#our last christmas

[supernaturalgirl20]

The Future

Pairings: Marcus Pike x f!reader

Warnings: Smut 18+, explicit, unprotected sex, mentions of therapy, mentions of infertility, Marcus being handsy, fluff.

Summary: it’s Christmas time once again in the Pike household as we skip a year ahead.

Series Masterlist

A/N: ahhh ok so this is it, the end. Thank you so much for following along and supporting me with this. I love you all 😍 (sorry it’s a bit late I’ve been nursing the flu 🤒) I’m also gonna take a little break but I’ll be back in February with a new series and some Joel content ✌️

Comments and reblogs really appreciated 🥰

The house smelled of Christmas.

Of the spiced orange candles that were lit throughout the house. Of the mulled wine Marcus had made earlier and the pine from the tree that was fully decorated in your living room.

You stood staring at the fire that was blazing in the fireplace when a pair of arms circled around your waist pulling you into the hard chest of your husband.

“Hmm, what are you thinking about, baby?” Marcus asked as he nuzzled his face into your neck.

“Just how I can’t believe we’ve never hosted Christmas before. I’m glad your mom finally gets a break from all that cooking.” You twisted around in his arms and wrapped your hand around his neck. His brown eyes staring down at you, full of warmth and adoration and you can’t believe how differently things could have been.

“I love you so much, baby. I’m so glad we made that trip home last year. It was the wake up call I needed. Now look at us,” he says as his eyes drift around the room, taking it all in before they meet your gaze again.

“I think you mean only for your mother,” you beamed up at him and the smile that spread across his face sent a spark straight to your core.

“Ok, I’ll admit it was her meddling that finally gave me the slap across the head but, we would have come to the same conclusion all on our own.” He says, kissing your neck, the slight stubble rubbing along your skin.

“I don’t know,” you say teasingly, your fingers playing with the soft curls at the back of his neck. “We were pretty much done for.”

“We were, were we?” His hands move from resting on your hips up along the curve of your body until his fingers begin to tickle you. You had tried to keep a straight face but he wouldn’t let up and you began to laugh loudly.

His fingers stopped their assault and you both listened for a beat and when the house remained quiet you reached up and kissed him softly.

You swallowed his answering moan and his hands worked their way down over your hips, slowly pulling your dress up over your thighs. You shuddered under his touch when his fingers ran along the seam of your underwear but you quickly pulled away.

“Marcus, you rasped. “We can’t. We have to make sure everything’s ready, your parents will be here soon.” He shook his head as he inched closer, his arms pulling you back into his embrace.

“Got everything under control, baby. We have time.” His lips graze along the skin of your neck and you moan when he nips you gently.

“I don’t….what about….oh god,” you moan as his hand squeezes your breast. “Easy, they're a little sore.”

“Sorry. I’ll be gentle, promise,” he whispers into your skin as he peppers kisses down along your neck and the curve of your breasts. “Ok,” you breath out raggedly, “but we gotta be quick.”

“I can work with that,” he says as he pulls you along behind him and up the stairs towards your shared room.

***

He’s gentle. Fingers brushing softly against your skin as he slowly removes your clothes, laying you back on the bed as he leans on top of you, his arms balancing his weight.

He kisses you passionately. His hands gripping onto your waist as his mouth moves down along your neck. “What…Marcus,” you whimper. “What are you doing?”

“Wanna taste you, baby.” His eyes are hooded as he looks up at you, his mouth leaving a trail of light kisses along your stomach. You reach down and grab him with a shake of your head.

“Please…just fuck me. We don’t have time,” you breath raggedly as your eyes drift to the nightstand. He follows your gaze before his eyes drift back to you naked beneath him. “Ok baby,” he says as he lines himself up at your entrance and with one thrust, sheaths himself inside you.

“Jesus…fuck, baby. Still so goddamn tight,” he breaths as he stares down at you. “Move Marcus,” you plead and he begins to rock his hips against you. Slowly at first but then you move your legs to wrap around his ass, urging him with your body to move faster.

“Oh fuck Marcus…” You grip onto his shoulders as you clamp down around him. He’s suddenly lifting you as he sits back on his knees, thighs working to thrust into you. His hands grip you tight around the waist as he pushes you down onto him.

He pulls your nipple gently into his mouth as his hand squeezes your ass and the feel of his teeth grazing your skin has you shuddering. Your climax crashes over you and you have to bite your lip to stop yourself from screaming.“Don’t! Don’t…do that wanna hear you. Fuck I’m close where….where do you want me, baby?”

“Marcus fuck…please fill me up baby…please I want…wanna feel you.” His thrusts are erratic now as he seeks his release, thrusting into you twice more before he fills you up, spurting rope after rope of his come inside you. He rests his head on your shoulder as he calms his breathing, your hand running through his hair.

After a few minutes he pushes you back on the bed slipping out of you in the process as he moves to lay beside you. Marcus leans over and captures your lips in a soft kiss. “I love you, baby.”

“Hmm, love you….” The sound of the baby monitor crackling to life on the nightstand startles you both and you groan into his shoulder. “I got it, baby. Take a few minutes to rest, I’ll use the milk you pumped earlier.”

He hops out of bed and dresses quickly leaning down to kiss you again before he makes his way into your daughter's room.

Hey baby girl. Are you hungry? Come on with daddy and he’ll get you all cleaned up and fed. How does a nice bottle of mommy’s milk sound, Hmm?

You smile to yourself as you hear him on the monitor talking to Isabella. He’s such a great dad already and she’s only three months old. The last couple of years have been hard. The pressure of wanting a family and not being able to have one really put a strain on your relationship but you are so glad that Mary decided to intervene last year.

It made you both realised what you had in each other and that at the end of the day, that’s all that mattered. You still blush when you think about all the sex you both had in his parents house last Christmas but it gave you little Isabella.

Who knew that when you forgot about trying for a baby and stopped putting all that pressure on yourself, you would finally get what you wanted.

“Baby, mom text. They're nearly here,” Marcus shouted up the stairs. You hop out of bed and get dressed, fixing up your little bit of makeup before joining him in the siting room.

“Look, Izzy. Mommy’s here. Doesn’t she look beautiful,” Marcus coos as he leans over and kisses you.

“Will you stop,” you laugh, slapping his arm playfully. “Can’t a man admire his hot wife?” He says, waggling his eyebrows at you as he places Izzy gently on her mat.

“Behave, Mr Pike. We have a full house this weekend.” He looks at you then with a sly smirk on his face, that dimple you love making an appearance.

“When did that stop us, Mrs Pike?” He says suggestively, his hand resting on your thigh. Swatting his hand away you smile down at your daughter, her brown eyes wide with wonder as she takes in the toys dangling above her. She’s the image of Marcus, a carbon copy and she has him wrapped around her little finger.

“Did you reschedule our appointment with Dr. Crawford?” You ask, turning your head and meeting his gaze.

“I told her we’d come for a joint session after the holidays,” he says nodding his head. “Thank you for all this baby. For sticking with me and working on our marriage, for giving me Izzy.” His face is serious now as he stares at you but so full of love and adoration.

“And thank you for being committed to going to therapy with me and working out our issues. You’re an amazing father Marcus, and a great husband and I love you.” You kiss him again and he wraps his arm around you, pulling you closer.

“I love you too, baby. I love you both so much.” He gives you another quick kiss before the sound of a car pulling into the drive grabs your attention. Marcus smiles at you and looks down at Izzy. “Ok pumpkin, time to see nanny and pop pop.”

“You ready baby?” Marcus asks with a wink.

“As I’ll ever be. Now go on and let your mom in, she’s been dying to get her hands on Izzy.”

**** Putting this at the end just to say that I’m fully aware that fertility issues can happen to anyone and that it doesn’t always have a happy ending like this. I had a miscarriage myself before I had my three babies and my aunt couldn’t have her own children after trying for years so she adopted. You think it’s something you should be able to do because you’re a woman but it doesn’t always work out. That doesn’t make you broken or worthless. You’re stronger than you know. There are many ways to become a mother. Anyway, if anyone ever needs to chat or vent or whatever, I’m always here 🥰

Everything: @maievdenoir @amneris21 @hnt-escape @elegantduckturtle @harriedandharassed @jediknight122 @ayrusss @hayley-the-comet @sherala007 @alexxavicry @scorpio-marionette @donnaa @practicalghost @tanzthompson @beskarprincessjenny @littlemisspascal @icanbeyourjedi @thatpinkshirt @maryfanson @sunnshineeexoxo @misspearly1 @misspearlssideblog @athalien @its--fandom--darling @sara-alonso @doommommy @browneyes-issac @trickstersp8 @nembees @kaitieskidmore1 @mswarriorbabe80 @allthe-ships @tintinn16 @hungrhay @rosie-posie08 @manuymesut @all-the-way-down-here @iccedays @tusk89 @graciexmarvel @pedrostories @pedr0swh0r3 @musings-of-a-rose

[cliopadra]

Merry Christmas, don’t forget to kiss your ship’s unicorn for good luck

[yesloulou]

🎄 daniel in perth during the 22/23 winter break 🎄

[bakedbakermom]

txf + text posts (9/?)

[alabyte]

Just snipers having an overnight hangout with their onesies and some holo-simulators

That's what happens when you give two besties an opportunity to make their own RP with their own rules

[youryurigoddess]

Is this the right moment to mention that “Nothing Lasts Forever” is a title of a 1979 novel by Roderick Thorp, basis for the “Die Hard”? You know, that Christmas movie with Bruce Willis caught up in a terrorist takeover of a corporate skyscraper while visiting his estranged wife?

[the-irrelevant-trumpeter]

other people once november hits:

me once november hits:

[tortellinigirl]

i think the adult relationship to the childhood dog is something that is so tender and heart-wrenching and important. you are the last vestige of my childhood. you are the sacred keeper of the memories i hold dearest, but you can barely see or hear me anymore. who do i become once you’re gone? where do i turn to remember myself? you’re the last one sitting next to me at the door of a childhood home that no longer exists, waiting patiently for the return of a family that no longer exists. where can i live when you, too, no longer exist? i can’t let go. please don’t make me let go. i know you’ll leave soon. i wish you didn’t have to. but she’s just a dog. her life is short and i will witness her death and i’ve known this from the beginning. i didn’t think it would come so fast. am i ready? have i become someone yet? have i become unrecognizable to her yet? does she still see the child i was? i’m still the child i was. please, don’t forget the child i was. please don’t take her away from me.

[shima-draws]

Happy New Year to me, I have Covid :)))))

[cashmoneychiyo]

Gekkan Shoujo Nozaki-kun Chapter 138, Part 1

Part 2 here [x]

© Cash Money Chiyo (@grolia, candlejack, @maou-shoujo, shire, and @variationa!)

[disasterbiwriter]

I know we've all experienced the "I want someone to write the fanfic I want to read and I don't want it to be me" phenomenon, but it feels extra pathetic when it's a fic from your VERY SPECIFIC AU/canon.

[supernaturalgirl20]

Mischievous Elf

Pairings: Marcus Pike x f!reader

Warnings: Smut 18+, explicit, unprotected sex, PinV sex, oral (female receiving), cursing, jealousy, angsty, mention of fertility issues, mentions of separation.

Summary: Marcus’s jealousy has gotten the better of him and he needs to claim you as his. But his mother isn’t finished with her scheming and forces the two of you to relive a certain moment that make you both realise what you’re about to lose.

Series Masterlist

Comments and reblogs really appreciated 🥰

*** follow @supernaturalgirl20-writes and turn on notifications for updates on my writing. ***

Fumbling at the door with his keys Marcus finally manages to open it before pushing you inside. With the click of the lock, your back meets the wall and his lips find yours in a searing kiss. God, you’ve missed this. The way you both couldn’t keep your hands off each other.

“Oh, fuck!” Marcus moans as you grab his length through his jeans rubbing the palm of your hand over his hardened length. “We need to…need to get to our room or I’m gonna fuck you right here,” he say with a strangled groan. You bite into your bottom lip as you stare up at him through hooded eyes, “better get moving then.” Marcus growls as he twines his fingers with yours and pulls you along behind him to his room.

You can’t remember the last time Marcus has been all over you like this. It’s been months since you’ve felt his touch and fuck you hope things aren’t gonna go back to how they were, not after tonight. He pushes you inside and closes the door shut with his foot as he begins to quickly remove his clothes. Christ, he’s eager.

Once he’s completely naked he stands staring at you as his chest heaves with each ragged breath, eyes blown wide with lust. You can’t help yourself as you let your eyes roam his figure appraisingly, letting your gaze linger on the thick length of his cock. He growls as he approaches you slowly like a goddamn predator.

He towers over you, eyes tracing the expanse of your figure, taking in the curve of your breasts and your hips as his fingers trace along the skin of your neck and down over your shoulder, slowly nudging the thin straps of your dress off. Your body is on fire and the feel of his slightly rough fingertips trailing along your skin has a heat building between your legs.

He kisses the skin along your shoulders and neck and the feel of his slightly chapped lips burns a hot trail along your body. Pulling back a little, his eyes remain focused on you as he works the zipper down your back slowly until the dress crumples into a pile at your feet.

“You’re so beautiful, baby,” he breathes out, his eyes flickering down to the lace set you’d worn underneath. His fingers twitch slightly as they run along the lace that covers your breasts and you shiver in anticipation. “Remind me to thank Alex for this, after I smack him first,” he whispers into your ear causing you to gasp.

“As much as I love seeing you in this, baby. I’m gonna have to rip it off. Need to taste you. Been too long,” he breathes out raggedly as he pulls at the lace set, ripping it in the middle and tossing it onto the floor leaving you bare before him. “Fuck!” He curses before his lips meet yours in a passionate kiss.

He moves you backwards and when your knees meet the bed he pushes you back and you land with a bounce. “Move up,” he says, tilting his head in the direction of the headboard as he crawls up the bed towards you. Resting your head against the pillows you watch as he kisses a trail up along your leg towards your thigh and you shudder under his touch.

Nestling himself firmly between your thighs he nudges your legs open with his shoulders as his mouth works its way to your core.

“Ooh!” You moan as your back arches off the bed, hands finding purchase in his hair. He moves your legs over his shoulders and buries his tongue inside you. Fuck you missed the feel of his tongue devouring you. It’s one of his many talents.

He alternates between licking and sucking and shoving his tongue inside you so that you are a complete and utter mess on the bed below him. Writhing in pleasure. That heat begins to form and you can feel yourself getting closer and closer to ecstasy and cry out his name as the pleasure from your orgasm consumes you.

“Shh, baby. You gotta keep quiet,” he whispers as he pulls away from your core. His tongue licks around his lips as he moves above you completely. You reach up and kiss him, tasting yourself on his tongue. You can feel the tip of him nudging at your entrance but you push him onto his back.

Straddling his waist you grab his cock lining it up before slowly sinking down onto him. “Oh fuck”, he moans loudly, closing his eyes briefly in the hopes that he won’t come straight away like a fucking teenager. His hands grip your hips as you begin to move above him - your hips rocking over him, teasing him. Sitting up, he pulls your nipple into his mouth as he grabs you tight, pushing you down onto him.

His tongue circles your pebbled nipple before biting it, sending a shiver through your spine. “Oh Marcus I’m…I’m gonna..” you moan loudly, tilting your head back as the pleasure begins to build.

“That’s it, baby…come on my cock. Want to feel you soak me,” Marcus groans as he pulls your nipple into his mouth again and sucks hard. “Fuck, oh fuck!” You breathe out raggedly and you bite your bottom lip hard as you come, trying not to wake everyone in the house.

You shudder in his arms as your cunt clenches around him - his thrusts becoming erratic- sending him over the edge. “Where? Baby where do you want me?” He mumbles into your chest before meeting your gaze.

“Inside…please. I want to feel you, baby. Wanna have you drip down my thighs.” He groans as he thrusts into you a few more times, his grip on you tightening as he nears his release. “Ngh! Fuck baby,” he cries out, coming hard and coating your walls with his hot seed.

He brushes the hair off your face and captures your lips in a soft kiss before laying back - pulling you with him. His soft cock slips out of you as you nestle into his side.

His fingers run along the skin of your arm and you shudder under his ministrations. “That was…amazing,” you say softly. He hums in agreement and you both just lay there for a while, wrapped in each other's arms.

You run your fingers along his chest and he places his hand over yours. Tilting your head so you can see his face, he’s already looking at you. He says nothing as he stares at you, his face soft and eyes full of adoration.

“I’ve missed this, baby,” he whispers so softly you barely hear him. “I’m sorry for how I’ve been…” You place your finger over his mouth, quietening him. “Let’s not do this now. We can have that conversation tomorrow. Please. Just hold me.”

Marcus smiles at you and nods his head as he squeezes you tighter. “Ok. Tomorrow.” You both fall asleep like that, wrapped up in each other.

***

The feel of Marcus’s lips peppering kisses along your shoulder wakes you from the best sleep you’ve had in months. “Morning baby,” he whispers into the skin of your neck as you turn over to face him.

“Morning,” you say with a smile spreading across your face. He smiles back at you before pushing you onto your back and moving his body over yours as he nestles himself between your thighs, pressing you into the mattress below.

You can feel the hard length of him pressed against your core and you groan as his lips capture yours in a searing kiss. “Need you again, baby,” he moans as he grinds himself into you.

“Please,” you beg as he notches the head of his cock at your entrance and slides in slowly. “Fuck..….your still so fucking wet baby,” he groans as he sheaths himself fully inside you.

You both gasp as your aching cunt stretches to accommodate his thick length and his hand reaches below your ass to move your leg over his waist. His movements are slow, languid and you can feel every ridge, every vein on his cock as he moves in and out of you. “Ugh fuck baby…so goddamn tight. Never wanna leave.”

Your hands trail along his back - nails digging into his skin as you feel your climax building. “Marcus…fuck baby, don’t stop….please I’m….”

The handle on the door jiggles and you turn your head towards it before meeting Marcus’s gaze. “Marcus, Marcus baby, did you lock the door last night?” You ask nervously. He halts his movements and turns to the door that is now slowly opening.

“Shit,” he curses as he quickly pulls out of you and covers you both with the blanket. “Oh,” Mary says, as she stands in the doorway, a wide grin on her face. “Did I interrupt something?”

“Seriously mom, you have to learn to knock,” Marcus chastises. “Yes yes,” she says with a wave of her hand. “The same way you two need to learn to keep it down.”

“Oh god,” you groan in embarrassment as you hide your face in Marcus’s shoulder. “Mom, you need to leave, please.” Marcus pleads as he holds you close.

“Ok ok, I just wanted to make sure you two were awake, I’ve something planned for today and then the whole family are having dinner at ‘The Thyme’ later tonight followed by a trip to the theatre.” Her eyes flicker between you both and she smiles knowingly at you before turning to leave and bounding down the stairs.

“Oh my god. I’m never gonna look her in the eyes again,” you say with a groan and Marcus just laughs at your embarrassed state. “It’s not like she hasn’t heard us before baby,” he says casually.

“Marcus. Your mom just walked in on us having sex for Christ's sake, I’m so embarrassed.” He moves a piece of hair from your face behind your ear and leans in and kisses you softly on the lips. “She didn’t see anything, so don’t worry about it. Now,” he says, his voice low and sultry as he presses a featherlight kiss to your breast. “Where were we?”

***

A little while later - after having continued from where you both left off when you were rudely interrupted and then showered, you both make your way into the kitchen for some breakfast and a cup of coffee.

“I see the two horny teenagers have finally emerged from their sex marathon,” James, Marcus’s brother says as he claps his little brother on the back. “Gotta say. Didn’t think you had in you, little bro,” he jeers as he winks at you both before he slips into the sitting room.

“Did everyone hear us?” you ask in a whisper as you lean into Marcus.

“Yep,” comes the voice of John from the pantry and you can feel your face heat from the sheer mortification of it all. “So I’ll ask you both to kindly keep it down. Some of us want to sleep.” He says with a raised eyebrow and you're afraid you’ve finally pissed the man off until he winks at you and disappears into the hallway.

“Jesus. You’re not touching me again until we leave here.” Marcus groans as he wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you close. “You can’t say that to me, baby, only makes me want you more.”

“Ah, there you two are,” Mary calls as she waltzes into the kitchen. “You two are going on another last-minute run for me.” She hands you both separate lists and you sigh when you realise you won’t be spending time together again today.

“Can’t we just go together today? It would be quicker,” Marcus asks as he rounds the island to his mom. “It is quicker. Which is why Alex is going with Y/N and I’m going with you.”

“Mom,” Marcus groans. “What the hell?” Mary ignores him as she ushers you out of the kitchen and into the hallway where Alex is standing waiting with a huge smile on his face.

“Well if it isn’t my favourite Pike,” he says as he wraps his arms around you and hugs you tight. “Hands off my wife Alex,” Marcus commands as comes to stand beside you, resting his hand on your lower back.

Alex stands back, hands raised in surrender as he winks at you. “No problem man. My hands will be kept firmly to myself. Ah, is that the list,” he says, grabbing the piece of paper from your hand. “Perfect, let's go.” Alex turns to leave and with a quick peck on Marcus's cheek, you follow him out the door.

“What the hell are you up to mom?” Marcus asks as he whips around to face her. “I just want to spend some time with my youngest, is that so wrong?”

“No, I suppose not. Ok, gimme a second and I’ll grab my jacket. “Oh,” Mary practically shouts, startling him. “Make sure you grab your black one. You know, the one you wore on your fourth date with Y/N.”

Marcus eyes her suspiciously, “why?” He asks. “Just make sure you wear that one,” she says before disappearing. Marcus rolls his eyes before rushing upstairs. He wasn’t about to question his mother's motives. Lord knows she wouldn’t tell him the truth anyway.

***

“So, flour? That’s it?” You ask and Alex just shrugs his shoulders and nods his head. “Ok, what’s going on?” You ask, voice stern as you stand facing him with your hands on your hips.

Alex looks ashamed as he looks at you sheepishly. “Look. Mary has something planned but I can’t tell you anything so please don’t ask me. The only thing I can tell you is that you need to buy a dress for tonight.”

“Another one?” Alex nods, grabbing your hand and leading you into the nearest store. Jesus. What are these two up to? You think to yourself.

***

Marcus had traipsed through town all afternoon with his mom and she’d barely bought anything. He knew she was up to something but couldn’t figure out what exactly until they happened upon the local ice rink.

He turned towards her to ask what she was playing at when he heard his name being called from behind him.

“Marcus.”

His mom smiled up at him before turning to you and winking. Then she took off. He turns to face you and stands mesmerised. His thoughts go immediately to that night all those years ago when he’d brought you ice skating for the first time. Back when everything was so much simpler.

God, you look beautiful. You always do but there’s something about you right here and now that makes his heart flutter. He knew at that moment that he could never live his life without you.

Who am I kidding? He thinks to himself. Being anything other than your husband would never be enough. Ever. He had to fix this. If it was the last thing he ever did.

“Baby?” He says questioningly, as he moves closer to you. “I have to hand it to them,” you say as you smile shyly at him. “This was planned extremely well.”

“It was.” His eyes flicker over your head as he looks around at all the people skating. Families enjoying an afternoon out. Couples on a date and he’s reminded of that night when you both said you loved each other for the first time.

His gaze meets yours again and as he looks at you that same feeling he had back then rushes through him. Love. He loves you so fucking much. Always has, even when things got bad, he just forgot how to show you.

With a sly smile, he reaches his hand out towards you and you shake your head. “Come on, baby. For old-time sake,” he pleads.

Your eyes flicker nervously around you and you gulp loudly before meeting his eyes once again. As if knowing what you’re thinking he squeezes your hand in his and leans in to kiss you softly. “Remember, as long as I’ve got you, I’m never gonna let you fall.”

Your heart thrums loudly in your ears and you can’t believe that you almost let this man go. If this is all you ever have, you’ll be happy with that.

***

The time flies, spending most of it wrapped in his arms as he skates you both about the place. He never did let you fall. Not then. Not now and you hope that you’ll always have him in your corner.

“I enjoyed this,” you say as you both make your way off the ice and towards the kiosk. “We really should have done this every year,” he remarks as he takes your hand in his and leads you towards the small coffee shop.

“We would have if I didn’t protest about it all the time. I’m sorry,” you say sadly as you cast your gaze downwards. He reaches over and cups your cheek in his hand, his thumb rubbing gently against your skin. “I’m the one that’s sorry.”

His eyes shine brightly as he gazes into yours and a smile spreads across his face before he leans in and kisses you. “Let’s go inside and grab a hot chocolate. I think it’s time we talk, don’t you?” You nod your head and follow him inside.

Marcus orders your drinks and some blueberry muffins while you grab a seat for the both of you near the back. You know you need to have this conversation. You’d wanted to have this conversation for so long but now you're filled with nervous anticipation as you wait for him to join you.

“Here,” he says as he places your hot chocolate and muffin on the table in front of you before he takes his seat beside you. “Thanks.”

“Is it ok if I start?” Marcus asks as he pulls a piece of the muffin off and puts it in his mouth. Your throat goes dry all of a sudden and you seemingly lose the ability to speak so you simply nod.

“I want to start by saying that I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry baby,” he says as he takes your hand in his. “I know that sorry isn’t enough for the things I’ve said but I gotta start somewhere. I want you to know that even when we fought when we didn’t speak to each other, even when we decided to finally end it all, I loved you through all of it. You’re the love of my life and nothing's ever gonna change that. It’s just….I mean it all went to shit really when we started trying for a baby. I know how hard it was for you baby, but it was hard for me too. Shit, I’d be so fucking excited every month and then it just never happened and I guess I just forgot that we were in this together. I’ve always wanted a family. Always wanted one with you but honestly, if having a baby isn’t in the cards for us, then baby, I’m happy with it just being me and you.” His thumb rubs soothingly into the back of your hand as he stares at you with unshed tears in his eyes.

“So what I’m saying is, I wanna stay married to you baby. I want us to work this out, together. I’ll go to therapy, I’ll get on my knees and beg if that’s what it takes but I don’t want to wake up without you anymore. I can’t.”

You sit staring at him for a moment, trying hard not to cry as you let his words sink in. “Marcus I,” you say with a strangled sob. “I don’t want us to end our marriage, I never did. I just thought that’s what you wanted and honestly, I thought you hated me because I couldn’t give you what you always wanted. A family.”

“Hey,” he whispers as he places his hand under your chin, tilting your head slightly so you meet his gaze. “I’ve never hated you, ever. And I never will. I thought I was disappointing you because you started to grow colder, and more distant with every negative test and I suppose I just withdrew from you. Withdrew from us. I forgot to just love you and baby, believe me when I say I’ll never forget again.”

You're sobbing now and you can feel the eyes of some of the people who are sitting in the cafe but you don’t care. You smile at him as you begin to wipe away the tears. “We’re really bad at communicating aren’t we?”

“We were. We won’t be from now on. I promise you that, baby. Marcus leans in and kisses you softly and as he pulls away he rests his head against yours. “I love you, Y/N.”

“I love you too,” you whisper. Marcus finally pulls away to finish eating and your heart swells with love as you watch him look happy for the first time in months. When you’ve both done, he laces his fingers with yours and leads you outside.

“We should probably head back home and get ready for tonight,” he says as he turns to face you, a wide smile spread across his face.

“Or, we could head back and fuck,” you say suggestively with a wiggle of your eyebrows. Marcus groans loudly before pulling you into him and kissing you passionately. “Baby, you’ve read my mind.”

Part 5

[marzipanandminutiae]

i think it’s less that ppl are legit expecting a white christmas in boston every year and more that the probability for one used to be 20 to 30% and it’s now been almost 15 years without one and probability has dropped to 10% and will continue to drop. for someplace like worcester in massachusetts it’s even worse — probability was 67% ish for the boomers and now it’s a little over 30%. only 27 white christmases in boston since 1892 sounds small but when u consider most bostonians had 3 white christmases by their mid-teens on top of all the christmases where there was snow even if it wasn’t one inch and now there are teenagers who haven’t seen even one white christmas… it makes sense why ppl freak out every year it still hasn’t happened.

And that absolutely makes sense, yeah! I have immense climate anxiety too, like I said!

What I was responding to was more the people saying "it's 60 and raining in Boston and it feels like the apocalypse" or "this isn't how it's supposed to be ever; this never used to happen."

I don't know if you saw my longer post, but I went and looked at Boston weather records going back to 1893. Most Decembers from 1893-1903 had multiple days in the upper 50s, with many years getting into the 60s at least once. I didn't track every single year from 1893 to the present, but it seems reasonable to assume that that 10-year period wasn't just a weird fluke. December 1895 actually had more days in the 60s (5) than December 2022 (1).

That's not the full story, of course- December 1895 also had a couple of days in the 20s before that upswing, some with small amounts of snow. You also have things like overnight lows going haywire, and other reminders that climate change is real and it is happening now. I would never, ever attempt to deny that. It's the single biggest problem facing humanity at the moment.

However. There are multiple things to hold in our minds at the same time when thinking about its day-to-day effect on our lives, and one of them is "the effects are seldom as simple as It's Warmer Every Day Now Than It Ever Has Been, And That Will Continue Unilaterally For The Rest Of Our Lives." I'm not trying to deny or negate anything. I'm just trying to make people feel a little less despondent.

(I also just discovered that the metric for a white Christmas here in Boson states that it has to fall before 7 AM, which seems arbitrary and weird. We actually had a white Christmas here in 2017- we got 2.9" of snow -it just fell later in the day. So...it doesn't count for some reason? That's really strange to me. Anyway, the article where I learned this estimates our average yearly "one inch of snow on the ground at 7 AM on Christmas morning" chances nowadays at 19% as of three days ago.)

(I also think this demonstrates what I'm calling Reverse Environmental Amnesia- where, rather than thinking that the effects of climate change have always been normal, you tend to remember past weather in a way that fits the absolute direst interpretation of circumstances. Anyone who was in Boston on Christmas 2017 SHOULD remember the snowstorm...but I've seen multiple locals who don't travel for the holidays agreeing that we've had no Christmas snow at all since 2009.)

[anaalnathrakhs]

i feel it's so fucking stupid and ungrateful but it still hurts a little when someone gifts me something i just don't like. i don't know. i know it's dumb and inaccurate to astrain that much meaning to a simple gift, but it feels kinda like they don't know me. i guess it feels like people don't see me, like a reminder that the person i reflect and the person i feel like are incredibly different.

[be-the-glenn-to-my-maggie]

I've been complaining a lot lately about people not having enough media literacy but seeing some of ya'll's takes on this banger new season of Black Mirror has me wondering if you guys have... too much media literacy.

[darlenicy]

so it's my birthday today and the person i considered my real life best friend didn't text or call me. nothing. i can feel this friendship break again and that's just so hard