#posting this scene because i just reread it after a few months and i still really love it

[idk-ilike5sos]

Halfway through, the game was paused for Mike to use the bathroom. Will expected Max to follow, keep up the act that the bathroom door was the reason they’d been inseparable all night. But, to Will’s surprise, she stayed close by his side.

With an unacknowledged tension, they stood at their respective end of the table. Meanwhile, Lucas, El, and Dustin were on the other side. A few feet away, the three laughed as they spoke over each other - heavily contrasting Will and Max hardly existing together.

Will combed a hand through his hair, wishing the stuffy air could do more for his flushed skin. As time passed, he’d adjusted better to his new-found dizzy disposition, but his hot skin was yet to go unnoticed.

As his hand dropped back by his side with a huff, Max’s elbow nudged into his ribs. He looked at her with eyebrows raised in question.

“You look awful,” Max said, in her deadpan way, “in an if-you-don’t-barf-you’ll-pass-out way.”

“Thanks,” Will scoffed.

“C’mon.” Max’s hand wrapped around his wrist and she started pulling him away from the table.

Will didn’t bother arguing or asking questions - instead, following his feet as Max guided him through the kitchen. Careful of the beer bottles and plastic cups abandoned on the floor, he watched his feet trudge through the room until Max suddenly stopped. He looked up to a door leading outside, which Max opened then continued to pull him through.

As the door closed, the music was significantly quieter, giving off the illusion of a far more contained friendly get-together. The grass, muted in the winter season, stretched to a brown waist-high fence that surrounded the area. In the back right corner, a tall tree overhung a square of the garden. The branches were all bare, and gray tinted the peeling bark while a patchwork blanket of leaves covered the ground below in shades of deathly brown. There weren’t half as many people in the garden, allowing the chance for something of privacy.

Max dragged him along the length of the wall - avoiding stretched-out legs and bodies hunched on the ground - until they reached the corner. The closest person was at least six feet away and halfway to being passed out. Will leaned against the wall, staring into the garden, and Max did the same.

At the end of the garden, some people were smoking cigarettes and, from the smell of things, weed. Just outside of the group, were various couples scattered around, making out as if there were no one else around to witness it. Leaning against the brick wall of the house were a handful of people with red faces and slow-blinking eyes - all with the same goal of sobering up. Or, at the least, not vomiting everywhere.

In his periphery, Will caught sight of two girls wandering over to the lone tree. They stumbled hand-in-hand with red solo cups sloshing by their sides. Then, grips tightened on each other as they awkwardly sat beneath the branches. Backs against the rough trunk, their shoulders pressed together - like it was natural and not something they had to second-guess - then they lifted their plastic cups and cheers-ed. A mouthful of each spilled onto their clothes, making their heads fall back with loud laughter.

In the back of Will’s mind - he pretended they were in love. Secretly together, as they used mundane acts of friendship as dates. He’d never admit it to his conscious self; he’d curse at himself for being stupid. But, in reality, it made him feel less alone.

“I see you and Mike are friends again,” Max said, her voice bordering on an accusation.

It grounded Will: shoving the garden, the two girls, beneath a blurry filter. His cheeks blushed as if Max had heard all of the thoughts playing in his mind and his heart twisted with guilt.

Weight shifted between his feet and he offered a pathetic shrug. “We never weren’t.”

The fresh air swept over his skin in the shape of a thousand prickling needles. Ice clung to his skin - to the back of his neck - as goosebumps formed and hair stood. His stomach churned as his blood turned cold, tingling up and down his limbs like nails ghosting his skin.

“Bullshit,” Max spat - Will could feel her glare.

Between the however-many beers he’d drank and the long night - long three months - he’d had, frustration oozed into his blood, and his face tensed with all the ice flooding through him. His brows twitched into a frown and his jaw set tight.

“And since when have you two been attached at the hip?” He peered through the corner of his eyes: Max’s body directed at him as she stared out of narrowed eyes.

She faltered a little. Nothing but silence attached to her tongue as she opened her mouth in search of an excuse. Her shoulders rose, eyes drifting; she might as well have held up a sign with “I’m about to lie” written on it. She seemed to understand as much, when her shoulders slumped with a huff.

Will looked away, but the blurred filter remained over his eyes like a shield. He didn’t try looking at the girls again - worried someone would notice and get the wrong idea, that he was interested in one of them. He swapped them in favor of the old, wrinkled grass in front of him.

“Look–” Max started again, her voice stern, “–I don’t know what game you think you’re playing, but Mike–”

“It’s not a game,” Will interrupted with a desperate whine in his voice, as he finally turned to Max. His eyes bat between hers for a second as she settled and waited with raised brows. His arms flailed, the whine merging with the pent-up frustration: “I get that you’re trying to help - but it’s just making it harder. If you give me five minutes to talk to him alone, all of this could be over already.”

“Why is this so important to you?” Max bit back - almost every bit as irritated as him. “Why right now?”

There was his chance. Confess. Get everything off his chest. Let Max know - let Max help.

It was perfect.

“Because–” Will started, but his voice cut off, strained. With his mouth hung open - waiting for every word hanging on the end of his tongue to fall off: to rush out of his mouth with the same urgency it had when telling Lucas - his wide, glazed eyes flickered between Max’s.

She was his friend. One of his best friends. They’d been through a hell of a lot worse together than Will confessing he liked boys. That didn’t loosen the lump clogging his throat, though.

He tried to remember the feeling he’d had earlier in the day when Lucas had brought it up as if it was nothing more than an inconvenient crush. He tried to remember that Max had grown up in California - somewhere so much more diverse - and that she’d never implied any negative connotation towards, well, people like him. He tried to remember the summer of eighty-five: how most days were just him, Max, and Lucas - getting new high scores at the arcade, or riding bikes through town.

All the while: Max waited, expectantly, but something softer suddenly hid beneath her exterior. Her eyebrows lowered, the frown a faint ghost on her features, but her lips remained pursed. Closed; shut; silent. She wasn’t going to say another thing until Will dared to finish that sentence.

But it could never, ever be so simple.

With a defeated sigh, Will’s shoulders fell as his head knocked against the wall. His teeth clamped the inside of his cheek - all the alcohol in his blood making it impossible to blink away the wet glimmer in his eyes. His tongue quickly coated his lips and he wondered if Max would let him borrow her “I’m about to lie” sign.

“Because he’s important to me.”

It wasn’t a lot - it was hardly anything - but it was something.

Max stayed quiet, her eyes boring into the side of Will’s face like laser beams.

“And–” so, Will continued with a wavering voice; an ounce of courage - but the end goal was too far out of reach: a smudge in the distance, “–I know the past few months probably doesn’t make it seem like it, but he is. I just want to fix this.”

“Well, I’m sorry–” Max replied, quiet and reluctant as she lacked the sharp teeth she’d had a moment prior, “–but he doesn’t want to talk about it.”

“Yeah, I know.” Will nodded to himself - then let his eyes wander back over to Max as his head turned. “But we’re gonna have to eventually.”

Her face had lost the harsh creases, smooth with sorrow and pity. Her eyes met his, guilt in the twinkle of light - likely the same thing she was seeing.

“It’s not up to me,” she said with a sheepish shrug, “if he says he doesn’t want to talk about it right now, I’m gonna be there for him.”

She pushed off the wall, her gaze dropping to the ground, then she started back towards the door.

“C’mon–” she said, “–they’re probably waiting for us.”

Will got to work at blinking down the tears in his eyes as he followed.

[This is a scene from the most recent chapter of my Sober Thoughts series, continue reading through the links if you enjoyed!! <3]

[yuurei20]

Hello, Yuurei! Do you know if there is a timeline for the main story and events that would make for the best reading order? Even something as vague as "Beanfest is between books 3 and 4" to make a nice little roadmap for rereading purposes? Thank you so much if you can answer this!

Hello hello!! Thank you so much for this question, this was all so interesting to look into!

Reading order for events can be complicated, as the game seems to be playing with the timeline! For every "this is the order of events" compilation I found there was a disclaimer of "except for these points, which don't fit into the continuity," and that might just be how it is until we learn more about what is going on behind the scenes :<

If that is all right, I have put together a rough list of a possible reading order! (Largely by cross referencing the events/main story with things like this graphic, this summary page, and several anonymous posting boards, to learn what theories are out there.)

⚠️JP-server event information included below!⚠️ ⚠️ Also, this is not meant to be a definitive calendar of events! Just an idea about a potential order in which to read things with the least amount of timeline weirdness ⚠️ (but there is still timeline weirdness)

#1: Prologue #2: Book 1 #3: Book 2 #4 Stage in Playfulland #5: Glorious Masquerade #6: Terror is Trending

At the beginning of Playfulland Ace mentions upcoming Halloween preparations and finals, but he doesn't mention the Interdorm Spelldrive Tournament, so it is possible that this event happens after Book 2 (which is specified as taking place in October) but before Halloween.

The biggest issue with this lineup is Ortho, who appears at the very beginning in his college gear, which he doesn't get until Book 6. But they mention Halloween so it must be early in the school year, and it cannot be October of the following year because Trey and Cater are still living in the dorm...if you can forgive Ortho's outfit in the opening scenes, Playfulland otherwise fits in nicely.

Things get complicated with Glorious Masquerade and Terror is Trending, as they seem to be taking place simultaneously: both events begin with two different characters announcing that there is one month left until Halloween.

I would recommend Glorious Masquerade first as we don't actually see Halloween happening at NRC (just Jack and Ace preparing for it), but both events are about lead-ups to two completely different Halloween celebrations being held on the same day and attended by many of the same people.

As the end of Terror is Trending connects directly to the start of Spectral Soiree, it might be less jarring to start with Glorious Masquerade.

The continuity curiosity that people generally point to with the Halloween events is that the prefect is present for multiple people referring to Malleus by name, when they don't actually know what his name is until Book 5.

But there is something consistent across both Glorious Masquerade and Spectral Soiree:

The prefect never calls Malleus anything but Hornton.

It is possible that the game is asking for some suspension of disbelief with this point? Was my theory, but the prefect also uses the "Hornton" moniker during Firelit Sky, so maybe that is just what they do?

#7 Spectral Soiree #8 Book 3 #9 Book 4 #10 New Year's #11 Book 5

Book 5 lasts over a month, with Vil scolding Epel for not practicing during what were ostensibly their winter holidays, so it may go from January to February (the day of the Culture Festival itself is specified as mid-February).

The snow on the main campus seems to completely disappear during the three weeks between Malleus being invited to the VDC and the day of the event, but they might have just cleared it away for the festival.

#12 Harveston

We know Harveston takes place during the winter but not exactly when. Epel recognizes the dwarves from Book 5, so reading it before 5 might feel odd.

#13 Book 6

Book 6 starts only a few days after Book 5 and might technically come before Harveston, but from a reading-order perspective seeing Idia invite himself along to Epel's hometown right after kidnapping several people might be jarring.

Due to the timing of Harveston's initial release Ortho wears his pre-6 archetype gear for Harveston, which is also a point in favor of Harveston happening beforehand (a very busy few days for Epel and Idia). It will be interesting to see if Ortho gets changed to his college gear for the rerun, coming soon to JP server.

#14 Beanfest (1 and 2)

#15 Fairy Gala / Fairy Gala IF

#16 Vargas Camp (1+2)

The only hint we have for the two Vargas Camps is the knowledge that they happen within two weeks of one another and the title of the original event: Spring Happening.

#17 Rabbit Fes

I wasn't able to find any reference to when Rabbit Fes might be happening, but Ortho in his college gear places it after Book 6, and it is heavily spring coded.

#18 Phantom Bride

I was not able to find any specific timing for the Phantom Bride event, but we know there is not any snow on the main street, so presumably it is not during winter.

It seems to be generally assumed by fans that it takes place in June because of the June Bride tradition, and everyone's reluctance to do anything for Idia makes even more sense than usual if it is post Book 6.

#19 Tamashina-Mina

Was also not able to find anything specific for the timing of Tamashina-Mina, but we know it is hot (Jack faints from heat stroke).

Leona mentions a rainy season and Japan's rainy season goes from June to July, so summer seems like a safe bet (it also makes sense to be separated far away from Book 2, considering Leona and Lilia's drama).

#20 Wish Upon a Star

The Starsending also does not seem to have a specified month or season, but it is generally assumed to be happening in July because the event was heavily inspired by Japan's Tanabata, which is on July 7th. (more here!) Tanabata is also referenced by name in the original game.

Like Playfulland, Wish Upon a Star’s main continuity issue is also Ortho: it is mentioned specifically that he cannot participate in the event because he is not actually a student at the school.

He becomes a student in Book 6, which seems like it should put this event before it, except for the Star Rogue subplot. Idia and Ortho discuss the discontinued video game in Book 6, a sequel is Idia’s wish for Wish Upon a Star, and at the end of the event this wish is granted, which hadn't happened as of 6. 

No matter where you read Wish Upon a Star there is going to be some weirdness, so it may be best to decide based on personal preference! If Ortho still not being a student despite having just enrolled is more of a deal breaker than the Star Rogue subplot, it might be better to read it prior to 6.

#21 Lost in the Book with Stitch

Floyd has a line about summer vacation coming soon.

#22 Firelit Sky

Interestingly there do not seem to be any references to Firelit Sky taking place in the summer, but it is generally assumed to be around summertime due to the climate and fireworks festival.

Najma has a line about being worried about Jamil, but the conversation wouldn't be out of place before or after Book 4. Firelit sky might be one of the more flexible events, capable of sliding in just about anywhere, but the atmosphere fits in well with the line up of the Stitch event and Portfest.

#23 Portfest

The Portfest event takes about a month overall, but the time of year is technically never specified, so we do not know what month.

The biggest hint we get might be Rook calling the portwear designs "summery and cool." The aesthetic might fit best with Stitch and Firelit Sky, for reading order purposes.

#24 Bonus: Tsumsted

I have no idea when Tsumsteds 1+2 are presumably taking place, but there is no snow on the main street. As they are light-hearted stories it might be best to enjoy them between events rather than the drama of the main story? Perhaps between Beanfest and Fairy Gala, or Vargas Camp and Rabbit Fest, etc.

I made a chart for reference while putting this post together! There may be better interpretations out there than what all has been listed above, so I will include it as well, for the curious:

(and as always if there is anything I have overlooked, please do let me know! ♡)

[literallyanyname]

Banana Fish Rec List

Here's a list of my favorite Bfish fics. I adore whump, so quite a few of the recs skew in that direction. Because Banana Fish whump tends to be particularly intense, I highly, highly recommend checking the tags and content warnings of each fic before reading. These aren't arranged in any particular order. Enjoy!

Love Letters by labingi

Status: Complete, 31,106 words

My Summary: Ash survives the stabbing by Lao, and goes to prison. He and Eiji exchange letters, and eventually emails, for several decades.

My Thoughts: This is one of the most nuanced, in-character BF fics out there. It is, at times, as painful as canon, but with a deeply satisfying ending. This work is a beyond gorgeous take on the BF characters. Probably my favorite on this list. Also, it is technically a Death Note crossover, but it honestly really isn't. DN elements are only mentioned a few times as a plot device.

Just Offscreen by @chaoslynx

Status: Complete, 6,728 words

My Summary: Foxx doesn't drop the cigarette in front of Ash. Foxx's men torture Ash, and he is eventually rescued by Eiji and Max.

My Thoughts: Read the tags on this one. Even for BF, it's pretty graphic. It's a really good fic though. It explores the implied elements of Banana Fish in explicit detail, and brings to the surface some of the underlying horror of canon. One common problem I see with fics and fiction generally is the tendency to use graphic subjects as a cheap shock factor. This fic does not do that. It handles the subject matter really well, and Ash's stream-of-consciousness POV is expertly done.

Eat the Elephant and its sequel, How To Walk Through Open Doors by Dodici

Status: Complete

My Summary: Ash makes it to Japan, and finds himself a little in over his head. Eiji is there to take care of him.

My Thoughts: Honestly, I really like the prose. It's really well written and the language just naturally reads like Ash's internal monologue. He says, does, and feels things without really understanding or bothering to think about why he does them in this way. The author captures Ash's perspective really well. Also, love me some realistic Eiji. I have a particular fondness for fics that flesh out Eiji's character even more than canon does. (Honestly, I get really hung up on characterization. I will usually stop reading an OOC fic)

I'll Save Myself by kanekki

Status: Complete, 30,324 words

My Summary: Instead of arriving at Dino's mansion the next day, Ash doesn't show up until about a month later. Eiji and Yut-Lung are held captive during that time. Continues until a little after the ending of the show.

My Thoughts: This is one of my personal whump favorites. Eiji undergoes a major personality shift that feels entirely realistic. He is still very much Eiji, but his time as a captive has deeply lasting effects. He also learns Yut-Lung's skill with needles, which is just cool. Also, Ash as sporadic-and-inexperienced-but-determined caretaker is an added bonus. The gang element is something of a side plot, but it's well developed. This fic really reminds me of the scene in episode 2 where Eiji is about to jump the wall and says something like "I'd rather die trying".

porgi, amor, qualche ristoro by ADreamingSongbird

Status: Complete, 18,763 words

My Summary: Ash has a very severe panic attack. Eiji comforts him through it.

My Thoughts. THIS FIC. This. Fic. It does something to me, honestly. It is just so, so tender and sweet. It's really well-written and a truly breathtaking insight into AshEiji's relationship post-canon. I reread it fairly often. The discussions of SA are handled very carefully and sensitively. Ash and Eiji are both well-written. The large volume of physical comfort feels like catharsis after canon's minimal and scattered touches, but it feels realistic. Like Ash would actually be comfortable with it in this context. It's hard to summarize exactly how much I love this fic.

Offset by superbrightsunset

Status: Complete, 3,859

My Summary: 5+1 about Eiji's physical strength as an athlete.

My Thoughts: Short, but very sweet. I love the caretaking in this fic. The style is very similar to the comfort aspects of Bfish canon. It's a good read for a quick AshEiji fix. Also, Shorter! And a light sprinkling of humor!

Save Me The Waltz (Alternate) by crowsnest

Status: Complete, 12,181 wrods

My Summary: Eiji is bfished instead of Shorter.

My Thoughts: This fic stuck in my brain for several weeks. Ash, Eiji, and Shorter all have to really go through it, but it is immensely satisfying for all three to come out alive and mostly whole in a way that seems realistic. This AU spans a few years, and leaves a lot of possible scenes to the reader's imagination. I really enjoyed reading this, especially the caretaking aspect.

Drugstore Cowboy by suffragettecity

Status: Complete, 2,048 words

My Summary: Ash goes to Shorter for a brief respite.

My Thoughts: I am in love with the atmosphere in this fic. It's uniquely platonic-ShorAsh. It's a fairly short one-shot, but the language is very immersive. There are little pieces of information scattered throughout that are deliberately unexplained, leaving the reader to make connections on their own. Overall a good read.

Okay. I might add more to this later. There are other fics I really like, but am too tired to rec. If anyone has any fics they want to share, please do!

(Also, I'm new to Tumblr and don't know the authors' tumblrs. Please tag them if you do. And if anyone wants their fic removed, please let me know and I will.)

[red-hot-moon]

Five Fics

@ifishouldvanish tagged me to do some shameless self-promotion for five of my stories! Here goes:

In the darkness on the edge of town - Back to the Future, (young) Biff Tannen x Marty McFly, in progress - I started this to get out of my own perfectionism that stopped me from posting stuff and the response to it has been amazing. It grew from a James Dean film-inspired drabble to 4 chapters to 8 with a possible sequel... and it got me into a wonderful BttF fan community that is so inspiring and making me want to write so much more for these two! I sometimes feel like all I ever do is write angst and pining but the thing is, I'm good at it lol. And writing about time travel throws up such interesting situations and conundrums that I'm quite obsessed with it now!

Fishing in the dark - Miami Vice, Sonny Crockett x Larry Zito, complete - This was one that wouldn't let me go during my Miami Vice Summer last year. It's too bad the Miami Vice fandom isn't very active and that this is such a rare pairing, meaning it doesn't get much traction, but I loved writing this and especially Larry and Sonny's chemistry, which we see so little of on screen. Again, lots of angst and pining.

Green light - The D-Train, Dan x Oliver, complete - this was a strange drabble kind of thing that I wrote after seeing the movie which really captivated me. I was impressed with how this came together and I really like the metaphor of the colour green running through it. It seems only a few people have heard of the film so this is definitely the smallest fandom I've ever written for, but the responses to my fic have been ever so nice!

Stop all the clocks - The Pacific, Eugene Sledge x Sid Philips, complete - Sometimes I reread my own fics and this is one that even years later on I love to return to. The HBO War fandom for a long while was really comforting to me in how it portrayed young people who had been through something traumatic and were struggling to pick up the pieces afterwards. I really enjoyed the narrative device of exploring one scene from different viewpoints and I had so much fun writing Mary essentially as an OC.

The company of wolves- Sicario, Kate Macer x Alejandro Gillick, in progress - This is kind of cheating since it's a series, but part four of this has been in the works for about five years. Since I've been having health and mental health issues it has sadly taken a backseat because it was hard for me to write about something so serious while dealing with my own stuff (hence my pivot to BttF lol) but I'm fully intent on completing it. I still get lovely comments on it every month or so and that makes me so happy! These stories really pushed me as a writer and continue to do so, and I'm just really happy with what I've created.

---

No pressure tag: @mitochondriaandbunnies, @retro-hussy, @doesnotloveyou, @bg-sparrow, @jouissants, or any other (fanfic) writers who want to do this 😘

[moonshine-nightlight]

Will all of Dale out, I took the time over the past few days to reread all of it (pretty much all I did because sleep work and eat!) And oh man, I wish I could experience it anew again! To see how far you as a writer had come during the entirely of this, and seeing how sana and Dale grew and changed together.. it was just so well done!

Do you have plans to visit them again, in the future? Couldn't help but notice some things were left unfinished ;) and also I would LOVE to hear certain parts of the story from Dale's perspective. Those last few chapters when we finally *finally* got to peer into who he really is just made me want more!

And again, thank you for all the time and effort you put into this series. I don't think I'll ever forget it! (I also really like some of your shorter series, I went back to read them again too!)

@watch-out-for-them

thanks for sending this in! that's so sweet! i've hoarded this for a month because december flew by so fast

i do have some idea for little bonus stories and for full stories that take place in the same universe/setting (with a name-drop or mention of Dale and Sana etc), but no proper sequel is currently planned. One of the bonuses would be what you mentioned - specifically Chapter 6 (Walk in the Garden) from Dale's POV - as well as other ideas. it is hard to write companions stories from another POV if the main POV is 2nd person lol. I've helpful sorted my handful or ideas into categories because i lov to organize in excel instead of writing (the categories are: pre, mid, & post story; AU; Parody; and Outside POV)

one in particular i wanted to get out before the year ended, but i'm not quite done with it. originally after Chapter 24 (Assassin Aftermath) Sana was going to have a spicy dream about Dale, which is referenced in Chapter 25 as having happened, but which was originally going to be in the story proper. however, not only was a behind in writing with the story ending up longer than i planned, but it became hard to figure out how it would work since Sana thought Dale knew but he didn't and i didn't want be to get confused about that, also Sana wouldn't know the truth of how the Depths worked or Dale's backstory so i couldn't include much of that (because i didnt want ppl to think Dale could lik dreamwalk etc or something). It jsut got to be a weird balancing act that i didnt have time to figure out so i didn't. however, i decided to make a bonus/AU divergence where I changed the fight scene and did have Dale come to talk to Sana after the fight alone and stuff~ happens~.

this side path/AU story is what i wanted to get out over the holidays and which i have made progress on, but still isn't finished. i will try to get it out within the week (the modified end-of-fight to have an obvious reveal is done and i might put out today or tomorrow since its just a tweaked chapter 23). I've got over 3k for the new chapter and have been making progress, it just will not be done today lol

thank you so much for reading and sending in this ask! getting messages and comments and tags like this make all the effort worth it! ^^

[albatmobile]

Hiii I love the unconventional approach you’re taking with their relationship in Cardinal sins! I reread ARS recently and read Cardinal after and it really flows together 👏🥰 I can’t wait for them to kiss and makeup though 😙

Are we aloud to ask about your writing process or behind the scenes info? I’d love to hear your favorite parts about writing ((or least favorite)) and maybe a behind the scenes of Cardinal sins so far!

ANON MY HEARRTTT sorry for sitting on this ask for a literal month- just wanted to make sure i answered everything! I was super self-conscious about posting CS in the first place bc of the conflict i wanted to portray between them. I really didn't want it to be like 'we all love each other and have no issues anymore bc we're together finally' because that's just not realistic with 3 very different personalities like they have! the kissing and forgiveness will come throughout the next few chapters as bigger threats present themselves :p

yes! definitely willing to talk about my writing process. dialogue always comes really easily to me (except in some scenes of parent teacher conferences and scenes with Lian for some reason) as hard as it is to believe (or maybe not!!) smut is very hard for me to write tbh like it either comes easy in a chapter or it doesn't but more often than not, it's the last thing i need to write in chapters that include it (aka rn with parent teacher conferences opps)

behind the scenes / CS spoilers

as i mentioned above, i wanted their relationship to be tumultuous to an extent as that's how it'd been in ARS but in CS you can tell they're trying to change for the better (think coping mechanisms, opening up to each other... etc) while they learn how best to support each other as lovers in a poly relationship

throughout, there is romance, but it honestly becomes a subplot which I kinda liked!

originally, reader actually was going to be pregnant but i decided against it bc i really wanted to show cardinal in the field and as her own person. i felt like it would've done her a disservice to have her be introduced into the field and taken out of it before she even had a chance to kick ass as cardinal

roy- i didn't want his challenges w substance abuse just to happen in ars and then never mentioned again. it's really core to how much he's grown and a shifting point in his character in ars and i wanted to continue to show that journey as he grows older but still deals with the some of the same struggles + the different approaches he takes bc of his growth. also, how to make him not an accessory to cardinal and hood / comic relief as i tried to do in ARS :D

jason- no one butts heads (lol butt head) like Jason and reader!! i love how crazy their realtionship can get bc they see themselves as so different, when honestly they're more similar than not. Jason plays a big role in CS as he represents the opposite views of Bruce and, coincidentally, the opposite views of reader on Joker (how they coexist / can those opposite views coexist and for how long?) + his views on the Bat Family and how Bruce treats them vs reader's idolized version of Bruce as a dad. redemption vs unredeemable is a huge theme Jason helps push forward in the sequel :p (also repentance and sins!)

cardinal- consistently has dealt with 'what is family/ who is family to her' and that continues in CS. Bruce is someone she looks up to and has said she considers a father. she still holds bruce on this pedestal and and how it contrasts with the warnings Jason's given her about Bruce- I really wanted to work with this angle throughout the rest of the fic. alsooo reader as a mom to Lian and her not wanting to fuck up like her parents did

i can go on more! lmk anything you'd like to know about ARS/ CS or if you have any questions about the above! asks like this make me so happy bc it gives me a chance to talk literary elements like a nerd lol

[ladytauria]

1, 7, 19, and 32 for the ask game please! ❤️❤️

aaah i forgot i hadn't answered this! i thought i had, whoops ^^;

i'm pretty sure these are from the weird asks for writers 🤔 so hopefully im right, lmao

1: What font do you write in? Do you actually care or is that just the default setting?

I use Crimson Pro; it's a free font I found on Google Fonts, lmao. However, I tend to cycle through fonts. One will capture my attention for a while and then I'll change it again. I do tend to prefer serif fonts at the moment, but I also had a phase where I wrote in nothing but Calibri!

That said, if I can't use my preferred font for whatever reason, I don't mind using either the default font or the closest one I can find in their offerings. The most important thing to me is generally paragraph spacing; I don't like trying to write with a wall of text, and I also don't like having to hit enter twice because I don't enjoy cleaning that up when I go to paste anywhere dfghjkl

7: What is your deepest joy about writing?

I looove when I come up with a satisfying turn of phrase or metaphor! Or just... playing with words in general; puzzling out how to describe things or how someone would phrase what I want them to say. This is also what I sometimes find the most difficult & exasperating too, though xD

19: Tell me a story about your writing journey. When did you start? Why did you start? Were there bumps along the way? Where are you now and where are you going?

I've been writing since I was small. I remember using construction paper to make a picture book about a dog who---if I remember right?---became a superhero, lol. I also remember using a previous year's calendar to create a picture book as well; trying to find a narrative to string through the pictures they used for each month. (It was a horse calendar, if you're curious.)

I don't have either of those anymore, but.

However, I would say that my writing journey actually started when I was 10-11. My parents had set-up a family/kids computer in the living room, and I basically lived on it dfghjkl I started writing my first book. It wasn't great and the concept was ripped off from the Inheritance Cycle since I was obsessed with it at the time. The second was a little more original xD

Mm... And then a couple years later I was working on something different and decided to look for a place to post it. I found FanFiction.Net, which wasn't really the right place, but it DID get me started writing fic. And THEN after a few years of that I decided to seriously focus on original fiction again, because it's always been my dream to publish, lol.

Where am I now... I'm very happy with my writing voice. I can read over my stuff and only cringe at the occasional typo or wonky phrase, which is really nice. I'm still working toward getting published... in theory. I've been putting off revising/refining/rewriting my first draft, lmao.

32: What is a line from a poem/novel/fanfic that you return to from time and time again? How did you find it? What does it mean to you?

This is a hard one to answer 🤔 While I do tend to find phrases and such that I like, I don't know that I return to them specifically a lot. It's more a whole body of work dfghjk

Hmm...

Oh! Okay. So, I used to read a lot of fanfic for the anime Ghost Hunt. And there's this one fic, Beneath the Lilac Tree, which has a scene in it that I just ADORE. Two brothers, twins, are eating dinner together at a hotel and as they're conversing, they---switch plates? Offer the other food off their plate? It's been a while and I don't remember the specific action BUT it stuck with me? And I think about it all the time. It struck me as just this lovely moment of familiarity and intimacy, and I remember coming back to that fic and rereading it a lot, in part for that scene xD

Thank you so much for asking!!

[asukiess]

Fanfiction Year in Review 2023

happy new year. I’ve never filled something like this out… but  as I published more fics last year than I did in 2022, and I have as many WIPs in the works right now, it seems like a good idea so I can reflect next year 😌

(thank you to kasienda and bbutterflies for tagging me in their posts!)

1 List of fics completed this year in the order they were finished:

sunblind - Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Luka Couffaine/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug/Kagami Tsurugi

hearth – adrinette, adrien & emilie

switching shenanigans - Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug & Félix Fathom

the clouds above (opened up) – emonette & emodrien

backwards walk – ladywalker bed sharing!!!!!!!!!

back to you (just one last time) – ladywalker bed sharing (spicy) !!!!!!!!!!!!!

a rose by any other name – loveydrien <3

2 Number of words written: 

Published: 47,661

Unpublished: 67,068

Knowing I’ve written over 100k words in a year is pretty cool! Especially since I only wrote 20k the year before that. I wrote all the wip titles down in a spreadsheet at least.

3 Your most popular fic:

I think the clouds above. I definitely did not expect that kind of reception when I first published it! I’m really thankful people still checked it out after the Paris special aired, too. It was one of the more fun fics I wrote, and I feel I actually don’t talk about how much of an Adrinette girlie I am. Even pre-reveal Adrinette is incredibly meaningful to me! I wrote this fic in a few hours and I was buzzing with excitement.  I have another Paris special idea, but it’s… very much an AU I feel. Like it would be somewhere between the clouds above characterization and more canon compliant. So I am not sure if it’s something worth pursuing.

4 Your personal fav:

BACKWARDS WALK SWEEP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I actually didn’t know if I’d ever write Ladywalker again after TBSYM? I had small ideas but something switched in me honestly after allowing myself to like… write them in a trope. I’ve reread this fic so many times and it still gets me at all the emotional beats, and I feel the prose is strong in this one. Sometimes I can get a little wordy…! Anyway. this is when I felt I could write them again, and write more.

5 Your fav scene:

Published: I think the last scene of a rose by any other name.

Unpublished: I think this takes the cake

6 A fic or scene that challenged you:

Honestly, almost all of hearth. I took like, a six month break from writing it. Came back to it because it kept itself burrowed in my mind, but I redid the beginning like, three times? And I feel the ending is not as strong as I want it to be. I don’t think I’ve actually ever reread it, either. I won’t say I dislike it, but I think it was one of the harder writing projects of the year for many reasons.

The good: the Adrinette is exactly my comfort flavor. I’m proud of the statue scenes.

The bad: the pacing, the plot is a little loose, the prose can be a little ‘can’t see the trees through the forest’ for me, the ending….

The comments on it, however, have been some of the most meaningful things to me, and I am endlessly grateful!!! I almost feel like this was such a tumultuous work for me, that every thoughtful comment that called it poetic, that they wanted to savor it, meant a lot to me.

7 A line of writing you’re proud of: 

I could not pick just one. I got lost in my WIPs for like half an hour.

8 A comment that touched you: 

how do I choose?

All the comments on hearth, as I said. I can’t put into words how I feel about this fic, but I see the reflection of the effort and love when I read hearth’s comments. I could not pick a single favorite out of all of those…!

sunny who has graced not just me, but a wide swath of creators and artists with their thoughtful, engaging comments. I could not for the life of me choose just one, but maaaaybe:

Everyone who left tags in reblogs like “NEW ASUKIESS FIC?” or when whiskers complimented my ladywalker.

When piso said the following:

And huey’s comment that just. It connected with me SO MUCH because they GOT IT. sometimes you just get a comment and all you can do is a funny little victorious dance and shake their hand because yeah. Yeah.

All of kasienda’s comments. Literally starstruck is all I can say hehe.

Oh and ALSO when rosekasa said this.

10 Your proudest accomplishment (that one scene; finally finishing that one fic; posting your first fic; etc):

honestly just creating through a lot of life bullshit lmao

11 Do you have any writing goals for the next year?

I really don’t know! Knee-jerk:

Publish as many fics while keeping them solidly confident. Things I’m proud of.

Write a fic in the shape/form that I absolutely adore: non-linear, short chapters. These are vibe-excellent fics. Need to write one like this.

Balancing angst with fluff.

That’s about it really! <3

12 Anyone you would like to thank?

All of the littlebugs for sharing all their behind the scenes of creating; for offering support; for always been a positive support system; for always sharing in celebrating others wins and comforting when things are bad. I’ve actually never been apart of a creating community like this, and it was not only eye-opening at several points, it was quite a turning point for me, creatively speaking.

piso and blu for creating Loveybug and sharing her; for being just as brainrotted about Catwalker; for always being such wonderful people; for pretty much…everything?

sunny for yknow. all the things I’ve told you in the past six months! <3

mostmagical, bbutterflies, neurovascularentrapta, for being SO supportive and going wild with me over ideas and being SO SWEET!!! I appreciate you all enormously.

Literally everyone who has sent me a comment, on ao3 or in my inbox, or even just shared my work for others.

[e-vasong]

🍰 and/or 🖊️!

OOH! I wish I knew what fandom you were from so I could target you specifically lol.

🍰 Name one of your fave comfort fics (doesn’t have to be your all time fave).

I have a few comfort fics, and they're from a whole assortment of fandoms - but, call me biased, I think they're enjoyable even if you don't know the fandoms. The entirety of the Eleutherophobia series by SoloMoon is an Animorphs fic that is perhaps my most-reread fic ever. Everybody lives + my traumatized faves getting a chance at healing? Say no more! Do not let the first person scare you, I promise it's GOOD. The Last Love Song & Testament of Charles F. Xavier (X-Men) is THEEEEE cherik fic to me. Got me back into the ship after a dry spell! Def. worth reading even if you don't think cherik is your ship of choice. gig officially gigged (DBDA) by @laiqualaurelote is super popular. And for good reason. I read that fic and am just kicking my feet and giggling the whole gd time! And while it's far too dark to be a comfort fic....I HAVE to call out how memory makes monsters into myth (IWTV) by @divineatrophy because it makes me insane. Insane, I tell you!

🖊 Post a snippet from a current WIP.

Since I don't know what fandom you're from...I guess you can have two lol.

From portrait of an angel (IWTV):

He might as well say it now. “I’m writing it, you know.” The other side of the line is quiet.  “Pardon?” Louis finally says. “The book. I’m writing it. Finished my first draft last week.” Well, mostly. Daniel keeps remembering more and more that he wants to add. Small details, full scenes. A fucking ocean of minutes, hours, and even days all blended together in a slurry of liquid memory—countless events spliced together with Frankensteinian irregularity or lost entirely in the mess. He’s starting to doubt that he’ll ever be happy with the result. And he’ll probably be even more miserable once the Talamasca does their edit. “Figured it was only right to warn you.” “I see,” says Louis evenly. He doesn’t ask how Daniel’s recordings and notes survived. “That’s dangerous.” “Yeah,” Daniel does feel a bit bad about the inconvenience, but well. Louis is the one who asked for round two, and he’s a big boy who regularly drops millions of dollars on a whim. The guy can afford a bodyguard.

And from my currently untitled DBDA fake-dating fic!

Edwin now went out of his way to give Charles alone time, constantly concocting research projects and cold cases that required his attention. Yes, just his attention, really—Charles, why don’t you and Crystal go and watch a movie?  It was clearly intended to be nice. It might have been, if Charles and Edwin didn’t know each other so well. And if Charles didn’t know Edwin’s moods by the way they flavored the air, he would have been oblivious. Even despite their history, he’d missed it the first few times. Edwin hid it that well, that cleverly. But he wasn’t perfect, and Charles always watched Edwin closely. He could do nothing else. Over the months, he’d glimpsed it a few times. The ache and discomfort that underlay those offers; there for a second and then gone, like glimpsing a great whale as it passed by underwater. And Edwin paused sometimes now, when Charles asked how he was doing. Sure, he’d never been wildly upfront about his feelings. That Edwardian stiff upper lip was holding strong after more than a century. But still, Edwin had always given responses that were honest by his reckoning, even if that reckoning was pretty distorted by his upbringing and time in hell.  Hesitating like he was trying to find the answer Charles wanted to hear? That was very new, and Charles didn’t like it one bit. And he didn’t need anyone, not even a client, making Edwin feel even more self-conscious about it.

Ask game

[arzuera]

If you’re okay sharing, how many chapters of Robin’s Egg are you planning? I lost interest in dpxdc for a few months and am just getting back into it and am delighted by the amount of chapters I came back to. Robin’s Egg was and still is one of my favorite fics that takes up a lot of brain space with the amount of love I have for it!

Hello! Also, I know you asked this a long time ago so I'm sorry that I'm just getting to this now.

First off, thank you! I'm glad you love my fic so much! It really means a lot to see that!

As for how many chapters... honestly, I have no idea. I've learned a long time ago that I'm bad at following my own outline. Take my first big fic The Call of a Mute Heart. The original plan for that one was supposed to be 30 chapters, give or take.

That MONSTER is 115 chapters long and took about 3 years to complete.

This isn't the only time this has happened but it is the most prominent one.

So I've learned to not try to keep it to a certain chapter amount because odds are I'm going to blow right past it. However, I will say that I have Robin's Egg planned in 3 stages.

Stage 1: Damian finds egg and he's flying by the seat of his pants in how to take care of Danny because he has no way of knowing if he's helping or harming

Stage 2: Danny is awake but still in egg form. He still needs to incubate a little longer. But Damian can now check in to make sure Danny is okay.

Stage 3: Danny has hatched and now he isn't just Damian's problem anymore

At this point in the story, we're really close to the beginning of stage 3 and from there the clock starts ticking closer and closer to the end. Which in all honesty? Makes me REALLY sad because I have had so much fun writing it and Robin's Egg marked my first attempt at coming back into the fanfiction scene after an almost 3 writing hiatus.

I wrote off and on in between the two for various things but nothing this long. So to see my first attempt in a new fandom be so well received is just... so amazing to me. You have no idea how touched I am about it. You all have been so supportive in everything I've done. Even on chapters that I straight-up hated. Remember Chapter 3? Where Damian safety proofs his room and has the heart-to-heart with Tim and Nightwing at the end? Hated it. Wanted to take it down and try again. Couldn't believe that I posted such garbage. But you all absolutely loved it. Your comments put a new perspective on the chapter that I didn't see before so when I reread it, I could see where you all were coming from and I actually grew to like it.

So, yeah... I can't tell you how many chapters it's going to be though I do try to aim for like 10 or 5 at the end. So if it's like... chapter 51 when the end is starting, it'll fully end on chapter 55, etc. That's just an example, not a timetable. But I also don't want it to end yet as I'm sure that all of you feel the same. So we still have a ways to go as far as I'm concerned.

[utilitycaster]

I'm Reading the Drizzt Novels and You Can't Stop Me: Homeland (and some anticipated questions)

Welcome to yet another ongoing series from me, a person who should be doing other things and may abandon it but also frankly will do this for her own entertainment regardless of whether anyone else cares. Let's back up first; if you're not in this car with me, get out of the rearview mirror.

Until now I have pretty much only read the Drizzt novels in situations where I was unwell, tired, or without another easy means of entertainment. Specifically, I read the first few while quarantining with a mild but still unpleasant case of COVID in late 2022, and then some others while dealing with catching up at work/post-illness fatigue/the general vibes of December in the northeast and Midatlantic states of the US. This caught me up to book 6, which represent the scene-setting; more on this later.

I then read Book 7 on a long train ride with nothing else to do, while very tired and probably a little hungover, in January 2023. I enjoyed it, in part because Wulfgar, who I do not care for, dies. (spoilers I guess? I'm not explicitly avoiding spoilers because these books are 30+ years old, but I'm not seeking them out, and I believe he comes back to life eventually).

I then proceeded to read Real Books (TM) for the remainder of 2023, some of which I can recommend highly and some of which were dumber than Wulfgar. Flash forward to getting my car serviced in the tail end of December 2023. I intended to bring my laptop. I did not. I also intended to bring headphones. I did not. And so, with a phone with so-so battery and little interest in watching HGTV, I read book 8. And I thought "what if I started doing this, because I can knock out one of these motherfuckers in a day if I try hard enough." I then thought "what if I slam books 1-7 again and do a book a week in 2024?"

Clearly I did not do this, because again, I have other books to read and things to do. However, I have finally, after another long-ass train ride, finished a reread of book 1. And so, with an unclear but hopefully from now on twice a month at least (?) update schedule, I bring you: Homeland. The rest of these posts will probably be way shorter.

For anyone who is not familiar with Drizzt or Forgotten Realms or whatever: this is a weird choice you've made. Anyway. Forgotten Realms is THE iconic D&D setting; it's where both the Baldur's Gate series is set as well as the D&D movie plus all kinds of adventures. What's it like? Well, it's basically The Tough Guide to Fantasyland, for all my Diana Wynne Jones fans out there. Do none of these references work for you? You'll just have to pick it up as we go along.

The Legend of the Legend of Drizzt is basically, as far as I know (and I don't know much) R.A. Salvatore was hired to write some cool adventures in a D&D setting in the early 90s. The plan, per the suits, was to follow Wulfgar, who was big and blond and very Conan The Barbarian which is, I should note, way more the vibe of D&D than LOTR much as we (D&D players) are loathe to admit it. However, Wulfgar had brains made out of one of the boring adult cereals: dull, and only slightly more fibrous than the fun cereals like Honey Bunches of Oats. Meanwhile, Drizzt, his drow buddy, fucking ruled. And so, after writing three very sword-and-sorcery (or more accurately, scimitar-and-wizardry) books, Salvatore returned to fill in Drizzt's backstory. And thus we begin in Homeland.

Drizzt Do'Urden is a drow, or dark elf, which in this setting are almost universally evil because they worship Lolth the spider queen. Is this Not Great? Yes. I also am reading The Wheel of Time, which is Even Worse About Biology As Destiny. The main purpose of this book is to cover Drizzt's childhood from when he leaves the underground drow city of Menzoberranzan.

Drizzt's mother is called Malice, unironically. The naming of drow makes no fucking sense, while we're at it; Malice, Zaknafein, SiNaFay, and Alton DeVir are all supposed to be from the same language? I'm not buying it. ANYWAY. Drow society is matriarchal bc spiders and because, as this post says, Salvatore REALLY wanted to be stepped on. Drizzt was born the third son, and was going to be sacrificed to Lolth because third sons are useless. His birth was ALSO being used by Malice to fuel an attack on House DeVir, because if you slaughter a whole-ass house in Menzoberranzan it's admirable of you, bc ontologically evil; and Lolth powers are increased by childbirth or some jazz.

Several important things happen here, pretty much all simultaneously, heralding Our Chosen One (Drizzt):

The attack on House DeVir goes super well for House Do'Urden

The second oldest brother, Dinin, kills his wizard elder brother (known as the elderboy by the creative geniuses of Menzoberranzan) which means Drizzt can survive because they need a replacement wizard boy.

We learn that Drizzt's father (one of Malice's several consorts) is Zaknafein, who fucking hates his life and how shitty drow society is but also is really good at murder and so he kind of hangs out doing that for House Do'Urden

A wizard who melted his face off fails to kill Alton DeVir, the last of the house of DeVir, which means technically House Do'Urden's attack was illegitimate. However, Masoj Hun'ett, of another powerful house, kills the faceless wizard and Alton takes the wizard's place, but desires VENGEANCE.

Drizzt has lavender eyes but is not blind. His eye color will come up approximately a zillion times. I considered counting, but trust me it's SO many.

The rest of the book covers the following, roughly in order:

Drizzt is super good at everything from a young age; he is placed in the care of his only full sibling, Vierna. Zak manages to successfully argue that Drizzt's dexterity is SO good that he HAS to be a fighter and not a wizard, which permits him to train Drizzt, who is, as discussed, good at everything. He almost mercy-kills him before school because he'd rather his son die innocent than become a drow, but also he hates the idea of killing a child, and also Drizzt is a really good fighter, and so it doesn't happen. They depart on bad terms though.

Drizzt then goes to fighter school (instead of wizard school) and is an excellent fighter but not naturally deceptive and backstabbing because he is Pure of Heart; he is constantly skirting trouble by asking such questions as "why do we all want to murder each other all the time though" and "why is our graduation ceremony a drug fueled spider goddess orgy"

Masoj and Alton scheme; Alton eventually learns in a hoisted by his own petard way that the faceless wizard was also of house Hun,ett, and that house is willing to help him strike back at house Do'Urden

Masoj has a magic panther named Guenhwyvar who likes Drizzt more than him.

Drizzt goes on a surface raid and fucking loves the surface, and feels bad about murdering the surface elves, so he fakes the brutal slaughter of an elven girl. Lolth sees this and doesn't like it one bit and blames the whole house.

Drizzt proves himself on other patrols, and realizes Masoj Hun'ett keeps trying to fucking kill him, notably on a patrol where they run into deep gnomes (svirfneblin). Drizzt spares one of them as well. Dinin is growing suspicious.

Malice realizes that Lolth is mad and assumes it's Zaknafein, known problem, but Lolth tells her someone already knows

Drizzt tells her about Masoj, under questioning

Drizzt and Zak reunite and realize they are kindred spirits who are like "wait our society is MAD fucked up and miserable" and excitedly decide to run away and stop being miserable, BUT Malice is Scrying on them the whole time.

Drizzt goes out to clear his mind and gets cornered by Masoj and Alton. They try to kill him. Joke's on them! Drizzt kills Masoj, Alton's own wand blows up and kills him, and Drizzt gets the panther.

HOWEVER joke is also on Drizzt because Malice approaches Zak and tells him she's going to murder Drizzt, to which Zak tells her to kill him instead. She does so.

Drizzt learns of this and runs away.

The entire book is threaded through with Drizzt's first person reflections, which are actually quite touching at times but also definitely kind of overwrought so I do keep reading them as if they are Sex and the City/Scrubs/Winona Ryder in the 80s (Beetlejuice, Heathers) diary entries

And so our stage is set. If I recall correctly book two is "you have your father's morals; and his tendency towards clinical depression" so we're going to have a rollicking good time (genuine).

[elektricangel]

Every couple of months, I reread parts (or usually all) of The Divine Comedy/ONQR, because it's just that good, and I always notice scenes or lines that have been changed, or even brand new scenes that have been added. I love it, it's always exciting to see what's new, and the new stuff is always great, but out of curiosity, what is usually the driving force behind these changes? Do you reread your fic and think of new things? Or do thoughts hit you randomly and you go back to change it?

First off, thank you so much for the ask! I love hearing from people who are still going back and rereading the series. It makes me feel like all the work I put into it didn’t just disappear into the aether after I stopped writing.

But of course you’re right, I didn’t really stop writing. I may be one of the few writers who actually enjoys rereading their own stories because I write what I want to read but no one else has written yet. So I do reread chunks of this series occasionally and notice changes (improvements, I always hope) that I want to make. I am incapable of leaving things alone. (Like I went back and forth on the name of the series several times, but I think I’ve finally settled on ONQR.) Originally, that was all it was, and I was glad it gave something new for rereaders to come back to.

But lately, I’ve been going back and giving the whole series a more thorough edit to create a manuscript for a print book. I wanted to have this thing on my bookshelf. I recently finished that big edit so there probably won’t be any more substantial changes from now on. But once I get the proof copy back from the printers, I plan to post the files here so anyone can print their own copy who wants one :)

[jazzythursday]

Tagged by @aphroditestummyrolls for belated end of the year questions. Thanks for thinking of me! 🥹💖

Tagging @stormkpr @waterloou @sparrowmoth @its-tortle if you feel so inclined

What is your favourite thing you created?

I’m going with Cutting Loses for this one, because it’s the first wesper thing I posted on ao3 and the fic I go back to reread the most. It’s also a really solid example of my favourite way to write Wylan’s inner monologue and characterisation.

Which work are you proudest of?

Everyday, Just a Little or a Little Bit—My baby, my child, my 40k love letter to wesper. And I am so so close to finishing it!

Is there anything you are proud of that you achieved this year?

For writing, I’m really proud that I completed all the wesper week prompts earlier in the year. I loved participating and I feel like it helped a lot in developing my writing.

And something I’m proud of outside of writing—I’ve always had a really hard time meeting people through fandom, but finding mutuals on here through wesper and talking to so many wonderful people on discord is something I’m so proud of getting to experience. (And Mutuals reading this, just know that you make my little corner of the internet so much brighter, and even though I’m not the best at reaching out I’m always happy to chat abt anything 💖)

Did you explore anything new this year? (A new way to be creative, a trope you didn’t write before, or an idea you hadn’t thought of earlier, etc.)

Writing Wylan and Jesper as neurodivergent—and exploring my own nurodivergence through writing—is completely new to me, but it’s something that I’ve really enjoyed and want to continue this year!

Which work gave you the most difficulty?

The 4th chapter of Everyday has been a big challenge, I think just because I had a clearer direction for the first three and I always knew where I was going. Because 4th is after the original arc I planned, it’s been harder to nail down what I want out of it. I kept fighting on myself about which sections were too long and what needed more, and feeling too tired/busy/stressed to make decisions about it before winter break.

What was your biggest creative challenge this year?

Probably not letting perfectionism and low self esteem stop me from writing? Getting myself to actually write, and then edit, and actually post things—feeling like my writing is actually worth beta-ing and caring about as much as I do, etc. I go through periods sometimes of not being able to even look at my drafts without feeling overwhelmed, and so not falling off the wagon completely even through my accidental hiatus the last few months has been a real challenge.

Which work brought you the most joy?

Hmm. As far as fics go I want to say it’s Everyday? Buts it’s also brought me the most stress lol. I think what’s really brought me the most joy is just talking to people about my fics. Getting feedback on ao3 and on all the drabbles I’ve posted on tumblr throughout the year.

Which of your works do you think people should check out?

All of them if they want to! But Everyday, Just a Little or a Little Bit, Cutting Losses, I Need to Leave (Please Stay), and Careless is The Fall are all personal faves of mine.

Do you have creative plans for next year? Is there anything exciting you’re currently working on?

SO MANY (if I can find the time and energy) that I’m really excited to get to! Even once I post the last chapter of Everyday, there’s still so many moments and scenes and ideas from it that I’ve wanted to expand into one shots. To name a few: an expanded scene from the end of ch 2, Jesper’s pov of some of ch 3, and an outsider pov with the bookkeeper from ch 1 (he has a name and his husband has a name and they both have backstories 🤗)

There are also still a lot of wips in my docs that I’ve been neglecting. The wylan whump fic, jealous jesper, multiple post-ck things, jesper character study, and so many more.

Lastly, any words of wisdom or anything else you would like to share?

Write what you want to read, and chances are that it will find other people who will be so happy you wrote it.

[bylrlve]

Rereading the posts by @galecstatic and @chirpsythismorning about the edits to the script for 3x08, and I want to articulate my thoughts - screenshots taken from their posts

There are two angles to this - very confusing scriptgate implications and what it may say about Mike.

1.) It would be very, very strange for Nick to post fake scripts on 8flix, then go back and edit out bits of internal character dialogue. Not impossible, but strange.

One could argue that he did this because scripts usually don’t contain internal dialogue and ‘filler’ stuff, and he wanted to make them appear legitimate, and I certainly am by no means ruling it out, but he kept that kind of stuff in for the fake 404 and 408 scripts he sent out last summer in exchange for money, and we know the Duffers do include that sort of thing in their scripts - the confirmed 209, 407 and 409 scripts have those things.

From 409, to demonstrate my point:

It makes one think that these scripts did originate from Netflix, and that he was contacted at some point to have these parts removed - but then, what implications does that have for the script debacle of last August? It’s hard to make a firm conclusion, but nevertheless the potential implication is that this script, at least, is is real. I’m refusing to get my hopes up, but i’ll 1% conclude they’re real.

Now, onto what this may, potentially, possibly mean for Mike, if this script is real - and again, I’m not getting my hopes up about any of this after Vol.2 lol.

In and of itself, these thoughts and actions - angry with himself, what’s wrong with me?, I’m such an idiot, appearing confused, remaining still, what the hell just happened here?- are not entirely inconsistent with the explanations given in s4 for Mike’s inability to say ILY.

One could surmise that he’s aware in s3 of this insecurity about being a nerd, given that he spends the season trying to be ‘cool’ and ‘not nerdy’, being a bit brazen in front of her dad, but one could also guess that he’s perhaps not self-aware about the ‘don’t want to say Ily bc it makes losing her hurt more’ thing, hence why he’s asking himself what’s wrong with him.

However, he does say it to a room of people in 306, and tries to say the words in the grocery store. I have no idea whether this is intentional, but s3 and s4 Mike? Do not gel.

Back to the point; it’s strange that he’s confused by ‘what happened’ as it’s pretty straightforward: she overheard him a few months prior, told him she loved just then, and kissed him, and what’s wrong with me? is supposed to reflect his thoughts as to why he supposedly won’t ‘say it’, it being ILY. However, he’s then confused when she says it? The script also doesn’t reflect that look of realisation on his face at the end of the scene - I assume him realising… that she loves him? When she just said it? .

It’s all confusing, but I’d be 100% willing to accept that these thoughts are supposed to be consistent with s4’s venting to Will and the monologue… if they weren’t removed, perhaps on request of Netflix. Because if they were, that has very interesting implications. Very 🏳️‍🌈? implications. And the timing of the edit could be meaningful, although I’m not sure when it was.

[thefourchimes]

🍌🍈

Wasn't able to answer this last night as I had passed out and then I got really busy the whole day today, whoops, my bad about that, but here we go!

🍌 In your opinion, what’s the funniest joke/reference/pun you’ve made in a fic?

Ooooh...well, as mentioned in the previous ask, I haven't actually posted anything for Encanto yet, and while I probably have a lot of possible choices from my other fandoms, I can't remember any from the others off the top of my head atm oof

Plus most of my stuff is angst instead of crack AHSFUIHAFS but I'll do my best

So yes, a joke/reference/pun I've made for a fic...I honestly have a few in mind right now for Encanto, ones from the 233 page AU, but if I say it now, it'll lose its magic when I hopefully post it AHSFUHASF

I'll probably just mention this one scene I had written for the one All of Us Are Dead fic I have, one that still makes me laugh every time I reread it:

It probably doesn't help that my sense of humor sucks but it's funny to me at least HASUFHASF

My bad if I wasn't really able to answer this properly 😅

🍈 Who’s your blorbo and what are some of your favorite headcanons/ideas about them that repeatedly show up in your fics? Free pass to rant about blorbo opinions.

Ah, this question <3

I don't think I made it too obvious as to who my blorbo is before, besides a few posts and the fact that I love all the cool sisters so much, so yeah, guess it's time to "reveal" it

It's Isabela

I remember watching Encanto again all those months ago, the moment where my hyperfixation was about to rear its head and grab me by the throat, never letting go

As that was happening, the feral, chaotic, and unhinged cactus gremlin sister decided to jump me too

I can't remember exactly when I knew she was my favorite, but I just knew that she already was before I even fully realized it

I had WECID on repeat for a long while at one point

I think her exploring herself after everything hit me hard, I relate to her so much in a way, ngl... (except the hilarious thing is that I'm not even Isabela in this case, I'm the youngest out of my three siblings so I'm technically Mirabel in a sense ASHFIASF)

But anyway, I digress, my thoughts on her (along with my ideas for her that pop up in fics—er, will pop up anyway) are so wild that I'm not too sure on how to write it down in paragraph form, plus it probably won't be anything new since someone else in the fandom has probably already mentioned these, but I guess we keep going with it in a chaotic and wild way, true to Isabela's character (apologies in advance for the explosion of thoughts—except also not really sorry):

She's chaos incarnate, a force of nature that is so very extra and so petty as hell but it's okay because we love it sm

We don't get to see it all as much though because of her mask, but that just makes me even happier since she gets to be free post movie

She's acrobatic and athletic as seen in WECID, not to mention her skill with vine swinging, but that doesn't mean she didn't get at least a bit of clumsy genes from Agustin in some way, she just hides it pretty well due to her mask of perfection

She's always colorful and changing colors every time, experimenting with all the possibilities and she changes the color of her hair strand a lot too

She makes and discovers and explores all kinds of plants (ones she keeps track of to know what they are and what they can do), but we all know she has a soft spot for cacti <3

She knows a lot about flower and plant language, whether already having knowledge during the movie or learning after

She loves her family so much that she would and has sacrificed her happiness for them, that's something I admire so much but am also sad about because she really loves her family that she wants them happy even if she can't be happy, ow—

This seems to be a consensus the fandom has: she's one of the ones who will most likely murder someone and will kill for her siblings, very protective of her sisters and her family <3

Speaking of which, she has a ridiculously overpowered gift, one she has just as ridiculous control over as well, that I cackle and shake my head every time when someone just underestimates her and her gift

We know how she wants to be free but is feeling trapped as she's forced into perfection, half due to her own making and half due to others boxing her in, so there are lots of fake smiles and pretending on her part, but that does mean she's a pretty good actress considering she had everyone fooled for so long

I fucking love her bonds and relationships with her sisters and her cousins, but, as my PFP is indicating, especially the cool sisters

They weren't close with each other for several reasons for a long while, not even mentioning the strained relationship between her and Mirabel, but to see them have the chance to connect again and make up for everything was done and all that happened after the events of the movie? I love it so much aaaaaa

She teases the hell out of them in various ways, that's for sure, the sister vibes are so real <33

But that doesn't mean the cousins are left out here, ofc, the exploration of dynamics is always so nice and fun to see

I love all the grandkids so much <33333

I want to keep going so badly but I feel like I'd never finish this ask if I do AUISFHUIASHF plus I'm very sure I forgot something, but oof 😔

Ngl, this was me the entire time I was trying to answer this question:

Isabela <33

yep, that tracks HASFUIAHSF but yeah, thanks for the ask!! :DD <33

[palmofafreezinghand]

For Fanfic Writers' Ask: #7, #32, #35 and with that intriguing tag, #42 if no one else has also asked you about it! Seeing as you forced me to think about it and it turned out I had an answer however much I do not like the answer...

Thank you, @gisellelx !

Is there a character or ship you'd love to write for, but haven't yet? 

Renesmee. I’ve written her in the background of things but I really want to attempt to write her with more of a voice and discernible personality. I also really want to write about Emmett, but I have yet to find a plot or character question that feels right. I think he’s so fascinating and will probably be a fun challenge to write. 

And I’ve written for them before but I really want to write more of Rosalie and Esme’s dynamic. It's one of the more difficult ones for me but that’s what makes it fun. 

What's a fic you'd love to write, but probably never will? 

I think human!vampire alternate universes can be very fun to read and I have outlined a handful of scenes — most an attempt to see how far I can push Carlisle’s selfishness — and rough storylines but I doubt I will ever finish a whole story. 

There’s one specific plot outline I think of often of a 1927 alternate universe where Edward still leaves, I have yet to figure out the inciting incident or how to get him to leave, Carlisle accidentally runs into a human Esme (who’s son survived in 1921) in a small town he was passing through while wandering aimlessly. She’s going by a different name, as is he, his curiosity is piqued, he knows better than to stay after she recognized him and yet, he’s mad, grieving, impulsive, and slightly curious and in turn makes a very stupid decision. He’s already a “selfish monster” right, what’s the harm?  There’s so many hurdles and character choices that would have to be done just right to make the whole situation even slightly plausible that I doubt I will ever write it but I think about it a lot. 

What's your fic with the saddest ending? 

I think Sarah Bee has the saddest ending, although Oh Bill, I love you so… gives it a run for its money. 

Bride of Cullen gets an honorable mention. 

How do you get over writer's block? 

Anyone waiting on for appearances’ sake (last updated September 10, 2022) or a language of our own (last updated June 28, 2022) would argue I do not. 

In all seriousness I am starting to become fine with letting stories collect dust. I used to feel guilty but the fact I spent last month finishing up ideas I first jotted down two years ago is forcing me to begrudgingly come around to the idea that my interest in this series and fanfiction as a whole may ebb and flow but is not disappearing anytime soon. I do, however, now refuse to post anything incomplete on ao3. 

A few things (I think) help me get over writer’s block: 

I do really well with deadlines, this is probably because I’m only a few months removed from the cycle of writing thousands of words hours before 11:59 PM  that was college, but deadlines still work for me. I hadn’t written more than a few thousand words, which took weeks, from August to November, and then in November I wrote 30,000 because I had a self-imposed deadline of writing that many that month. Twilight Advent for example has forced me to finish two stories I was completely stuck on for years in a manner of hours the evening before they were slated to be posted. 

If I have not written in a while and I think of something for a current WIP, I do not allow myself to resume writing in the document. I can make notes but if I want to add to an already written section I have to retype it, which usually forces me into seeing a flaw I didn’t previously notice and makes me feel like I’ve written more new words than I have and encourages me to keep going. Sometimes I’ll retype a story even if I don’t have any ideas on how to better the draft or have any desire to write and it’ll force some words loose. 

I reread past stories. I have this bad habit of dropping references to things I believe have happened to these characters in the past without having a corresponding story written. Sometimes reminding myself of those little references will force my mind into thinking of another plot. 

Accepting I’m not writing (for fun) for a while and diving into other hobbies instead.  I can only crochet, cross stitch, hike, quilt, etc. so much before I think of some snippet of dialogue I must write down. Sometimes it takes a few months but I figure if that happens the break is needed.

But I think the biggest thing for me is ironically disconnecting from fandom. I’m unsure if this is simply a social media killing our brains kind of thing or I can’t write well if I’m thinking about dozens of other people’s thoughts on these characters and plot lines, but I seem to finally sit down and write when I’ve been logged out of Tumblr and ao3 for a little bit. 

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