The next fucking weirdo I see using the "#incontinence" and "#adult diapers" tag for fucking porn or "kinwky baby rowlepay uwu" I'm hunting them for sport. Have some damned basic respect. Jesus.
If you want to call yourself "madpunk", "cripplepunk", "neuropunk", etc, your activism better not stop at the things you find "bad". People with no empathy. People with personality disorders. People who need their aids in daily life. People who have extreme fluctuating emotions. People with paraphilias. People with dissociative disorders. Psychotic people. People who have different modes of eating, excreting, having sex, etc. Homeless people. People who wear diapers. People who have violent urges/thoughts. People who you think are "dangerous". People who use drugs. People who need medication to survive and live. People with physical deformities. People who have delusions. People who struggle with feeding themselves, cleaning, working, etc.
If you think any of these factors make someone "abusive", you are ableist. Abusers are abusive. None of the above things make someone an abuser.
Madpunk and cripplepunk aren't just "adhd and autism punk". Or "mobility aid user punk". Keep that in mind.
This summer, SVTHUB is coming to a venue near you! From Tokyo, Italy, and Hong Kong to Brazil, join us and check in at your favorite cities all around the world! Our special guests have worked hard to prepare their performances, and we can't wait to share these chart-topping hits!
parental advisory warning: you must be 18+ to attend the show. some songs on the setlist are explicit. see each individual city for more details and warnings.
Get your tickets now before they sell out - click here to join the taglist!
now playing: "when in rome" by @highvern
NSFW 💿 0:08 ─ㅇ─────── 4:05 ⇆ ◁ II ▷ ↺
> vocals by: 최승철 choi seungcheol
> genre: pop, r&b, elevator music, jazz — smut, fluff, comedy, romance
> key: E minor, G major — friends to lovers, idiots to lovers
> instrumentals: synthesizer, electric guitar, harmonica, xylophone — non-idol au, happy ending, drunken confessions, tbd
> lyrics: "After months of no contact, Seungcheol isn't sure what to expect when he sees you again at Jeonghan's wedding. He's prepared to apologize, to grovel, to bear the weight of a cold shoulder. Whatever it takes to have you back, his best friend since diapers; or whatever will ensure the last third of your trio has the best day of his life. But when he overhears the most recent development in your relationship, he must come to terms with something he was never prepared for, or risk losing you for good."
now playing: "somebody" by @onlymingyus
NSFW 💿 0:08 ─ㅇ─────── 4:05 ⇆ ◁ II ▷ ↺
> vocals by: 최승철 choi seungcheol
> genre: pop, r&b, indie, jazz — smut, fluff, angst, romance
> key: E-flat major, G minor, G major — neighbors, fake dating, idiots to lovers
> instrumentals: synthesizer, electric guitar, clarinet — non-idol au, happy ending, single parent au
> lyrics: "When you need someone to help you out of a bind quickly you pick the first person you see to be your 'boyfriend', you just didn’t expect it to be your single hot dad neighbor, Choi Seungcheol..."
now playing: "ashes seattle, left behind" by @synthetickitsune
SFW 🎧 1:00 ───ㅇ───── 4:05 ⇆ ◁ II ▷ ↺
> vocals by: 윤정한 yoon jeonghan
> genre: indie, electronic, punk — angst, supernatural, horror
> key: D major, B-flat minor — strangers, unrequited love
> instrumentals: synthesizer, cello, trumpet — non-idol au, flower shop au, reincarnation/soulmates au
> lyrics: "Everything eventually comes to an end. Life. Love. Even marriage only lasts until death do us apart. So why should a soul bond be any different?"
now playing: "the mirror blue night" by @neoneun-au
NSFW 💿 1:23 ────ㅇ──── 3:05 ⇆ ◁ II ▷ ↺
> vocals by: 홍지수 hong jisoo
> genre: indie, jazz, pop — angst, romance, suggestive (not explicit) & mature themes
> key: D major, D minor — strangers, forbidden love
> instrumentals: synthesizer, xylophone — non-idol au, infidelity/affair au
> lyrics: "After the discovery that your husband is having an affair with a woman in your building, you run into her husband. At first you simply cling to each other in mutual destruction and betrayal, but as your lives entangle further you think there might be more there than just misery between you."
now playing: "when we met in venice: half past five high prologue" by @multi-kpop-fanfics
NSFW 💿 1:23 ───ㅇ───── 3:05 ⇆ ◁ II ▷ ↺
> vocals by: 홍지수 hong jisoo
> genre: r&b, pop, elevator music — fluff, smut, comedy
> key: D major — strangers to lovers
> instrumentals: synthesizer, electric guitar — non-idol au, happy ending
> lyrics: "In the world of fashion, social media and influence, you're one of the game changers. But you never knew that a smaller player in the form of a freelance photographer would be able to change you."
now playing: "ocean view" by @junkissed
NSFW 💿 0:06 ─ㅇ─────── 6:10 ⇆ ◁ II ▷ ↺
> vocals by: 文俊辉 wen junhui
> genre: r&b, jazz, pop — fluff, romance, smut
> key: D major — strangers to lovers
> instrumentals: synthesizer, electric guitar, trumpet — non-idol au, happy ending, soulmates au
> lyrics: "An all expenses paid trip to Greece for your friend's wedding seems too good to be true, but it gets even better when you meet a handsome stranger on the beach. With the help of a mysterious old lady, her magic deck of tarot cards, and one too many coincidences, you're starting to believe things really do happen for a reason."
now playing: "tracing time" by @wooahaeproductions
NSFW 💿 0:06 ─ㅇ─────── 6:15 ⇆ ◁ II ▷ ↺
> vocals by: 권순영 kwon soonyoung
> genre: pop, r&b, indie, jazz, elevator music — smut, fluff, angst, romance, comedy
> key: D major, F major, E-flat minor — strangers to lovers, enemies to lovers, neighbors
> instrumentals: synthesizer, cymbals, electric guitar — non-idol au, college au, happy ending
> lyrics: "In order to cope with your mother’s death, you decide to study abroad in Rio for the summer just like she did. You come upon the diary she kept during that time, following all that she did 20 years ago. However, you didn't expect finding love would be part of that process."
now playing: "rain or shine cafe" by @wonustars
NSFW 💿 0:06 ─ㅇ─────── 6:15 ⇆ ◁ II ▷ ↺
> vocals by: 권순영 kwon soonyoung
> genre: pop, r&b, elevator music, jazz — smut, fluff, comedy, romance
> key: A major — coworkers
> instrumentals: synthesizer, violin, xylophone — non-idol au, coffee shop au, meet-cute/divine encounters
> lyrics: "With no umbrella in hand on a rainy day, you felt like your life couldn’t get any worse. Losing your glasses while it’s pouring cats and dogs, well maybe your life really was the worst. Thankfully a faceless stranger was there to pick up your glasses and hand you his umbrella. You weren’t able to ever thank him for his act of kindness, but the sweet memory stays with you for awhile. Soonyoung was in need of a new job and on the first day of his interview he stumbles across a blind stranger with no umbrella, and no glasses. He didn’t think too much about the stranger then, not until his first day of work at Rain or Shine Cafe."
now playing: "strawberry wine" by @seokgyuu
NSFW 💿 1:12 ──ㅇ────── 6:22 ⇆ ◁ II ▷ ↺
> vocals by: 이지훈 lee jihoon
> genre: pop, r&b, jazz — smut, fluff, romance
> key: D major, G major — strangers to lovers, idiots in love
> instrumentals: synthesizer, electric guitar — non-idol au, happy ending
> lyrics: "After breaking off your engagement to your cheating fiancé, you decide to take the planned trip to Paris anyway. A vacation alone with the honeymoon suite all to yourself seems like the perfect distraction. Just that, due to an internal error at the hotel lost soul Jihoon, who still isn't over his first love's death five years ago, is staying in the same honeymoon suite as you."
now playing: "asellus australis" by @wongyuuu
NSFW 💿 1:17 ───ㅇ───── 7:17 ⇆ ◁ II ▷ ↺
> vocals by: 전원우 jeon wonwoo
> genre: pop, r&b, jazz — smut, fluff, romance
> key: D major, G major — strangers, idiots to lovers
> instrumentals: synthesizer, electric guitar — non-idol au, happy ending
> lyrics: "Wonwoo couldn’t possibly be the only person living in Sydney who didn’t know how to swim, so he reluctantly says yes to the lessons his friends signed him up for. When he learns that you are his instructor, he figures learning how to swim as an adult isn’t all that embarrassing after all."
now playing: "34.6037° S, 58.3816° W" by @the-boy-meets-evil
NSFW 💿 1:17 ───ㅇ───── 7:17 ⇆ ◁ II ▷ ↺
> vocals by: 전원우 jeon wonwoo
> genre: indie, pop — angst, smut
> key: D major, F major — strangers to lovers, enemies to lovers
> instrumentals: synthesizer, xylophone — non-idol au, tbd
> lyrics: "Your latest assignment has you jetting off to Argentina hoping to finally catch the infamous art thief that's escaped your agency one too many times already. You know what's at stake if you lose your focus. Enter: the beautiful stranger that has you questioning everything you know."
now playing: "prince of belvedere" by @drunk-on-dk
NSFW 💿 1:17 ───ㅇ───── 7:11 ⇆ ◁ II ▷ ↺
> vocals by: 徐明浩 xu minghao
> genre: pop — smut
> key: A major, F major, G minor — coworkers, enemies, fake dating
> instrumentals: synthesizer, electric guitar, cymbals, harmonica — non-idol au, happy ending, college au, drunken confessions
> lyrics: "As an architecture student, you couldn’t have felt more blessed than when you received the opportunity to visit Austria with the firm you’re interning at. The only shortcoming? The fact that you were stuck with your coworker and classmate Minghao for the week. He’s always been your main competitor in class, somehow landing the same internship as you, and did you mention, he’s also quite the art snob? However, regardless of the rift between you two, you both are all too similar. Can a trip to Vienna allow for you both to enjoy the finer things in life, together?"
now playing: "meet me in amsterdam" by @okiedokrie
NSFW 💿 1:17 ───ㅇ───── 7:11 ⇆ ◁ II ▷ ↺
> vocals by: 徐明浩 xu minghao
> genre: pop, r&b, indie, jazz — smut, fluff, angst, romance
> key: F-sharp minor, B-flat minor, G major — friends with benefits, unrequited love, idiots to lovers
> instrumentals: synthesizer, electric guitar, banjo, harmonica — non-idol au, happy ending, religious themes, drunken confession
> lyrics: "Y/N and Minghao are both artists who grew up together, feeling a connection to each other because of the subject of their work, they start a friends with benefits situation. Of course, someone falls in love and they break the arrangement. "If there is a 'next time', meet me in Amsterdam." "
now playing: "food wars" by @beomcoups
NSFW 💿 0:46 ──ㅇ────── 4:06 ⇆ ◁ II ▷ ↺
> vocals by: 김민규 kim mingyu
> genre: r&b, pop, indie — fluff, smut, angst
> key: A major, E minor — coworkers, friends to lovers
> instrumentals: synthesizer, electric guitar — non-idol au, happy ending
> lyrics: "You and Mingyu are rival but friendly chefs competing for a spot to be an executive chef at a new location in Madrid. This position would change your life; no matter how attractive he is, you WILL get that spot."
now playing: "i get to love you" by @millennial-fangirl
NSFW 💿 0:46 ──ㅇ────── 4:06 ⇆ ◁ II ▷ ↺
> vocals by: 김민규 kim mingyu
> genre: pop, jazz — smut, romance
> key: C major — established relationship
> instrumentals: drums, electric guitar — idol au, happy ending
> lyrics: "Y/N and Mingyu decided to spend both of your honeymoon in Glascow. This is the first time in a long time that you spent so many days together without interruption. Whatever will happen."
now playing: "head over heels" by @gyupremacy
NSFW 💿 0:28 ───ㅇ───── 2:18 ⇆ ◁ II ▷ ↺
> vocals by: 이석민 lee seokmin
> genre: r&b, jazz, pop — fluff, romance, smut
> key: C major — established relationship
> instrumentals: drums, electric guitar — idol au, happy ending
> lyrics: "Dokyeom decided to take you away for a fun week in New York City. With his career as an idol always taking center stage, it'll be a refreshing change of pace. You can't help, but think your boyfriend has something big in store."
now playing: "after nightfall" by @wonuvs
NSFW 💿 0:28 ───ㅇ───── 2:18 ⇆ ◁ II ▷ ↺
> vocals by: 이석민 lee seokmin
> genre: r&b, pop, disco — fluff, smut, historical au
> key: D minor — forbidden love
> instrumentals: piano, electric guitar — royalty au, happy ending
> lyrics: "Deemed as the goody-two-shoes of the palace by your sisters and friends, you'd never not abided by your parents' rules—but when your eyes met his in the turmoil of your older sister's wedding preparations, breaking every single one of them had never seemed more appealing."
now playing: "strawberry jazz: love on the train to tokyo" by @idyllic-ghost
SFW 🎧 1:16 ───ㅇ───── 6:16 ⇆ ◁ II ▷ ↺
> vocals by: 부승관 boo seungkwan
> genre: r&b, jazz — fluff, romance
> key: E-flat minor, D major — neighbors, strangers to lovers
> instrumentals: synthesizer, electric guitar — non-idol au, happy ending
> lyrics: "In an attempt to let go of your past, you travel to a new city and pretend to be a new person. On the train to Tokyo, you meet a handsome stranger but miss the opportunity to get his name and number before you part ways. Lucky for you, your fates seem to be intertwined as you meet again just a few hours later."
now playing: "fall from grace" by @kwanisms
NSFW 💿 0:18 ──ㅇ────── 2:18 ⇆ ◁ II ▷ ↺
> vocals by: 최한솔 chwe hansol
> genre: pop, electronic — smut, supernatural
> key: D minor — forbidden love
> instrumentals: synthesizer, banjo, xylophone — non-idol au, religious themes, guardian angel, demon au
> lyrics: "Vernon has spent the past 26 years following Seungkwan around, protecting him from harm and the forces of evil; such is the life of a guardian angel. His abstention is put to the test when he meets Y/N, an initially unassuming server working in a club in Shanghai where Seungkwan is currently performing. He soon learns that Y/N is more than what she seems and intends on taking Seungkwan's soul to Hell, even if it means she has to corrupt him along the way."
now playing: "continuity error" by @nebulousbrainsoup
NSFW 💿 0:18 ──ㅇ────── 2:18 ⇆ ◁ II ▷ ↺
> vocals by: 최한솔 chwe hansol
> genre: pop, r&b, jazz, indie — smut, fluff, romance, angst
> key: E-flat minor, F major, G major — neighbors, enemies to idiots to lovers
> instrumentals: synthesizer, cymbals — non-idol au, college au
> lyrics: "The dreaded film bros of 1104 are the bane of your existence, none so much as Vernon Chwe. You've shared courses for the past two years and kept your distance, and as you go into your junior year, you don't see any reason to change that. Fate seems to have something against you, though, as you soon find that not only is he your next door neighbor this year, but you're stuck in the same thesis course, filming together all semester. You're not sure how or when, but before you know it, everything has changed."
now playing: "fate" by @cheolism
NSFW 💿 2:11 ─────ㅇ─── 5:05 ⇆ ◁ II ▷ ↺
> vocals by: 이찬 lee chan
> genre: pop, jazz, electronic — smut, romance, supernatural
> key: D major — strangers
> instrumentals: synthesizer, trumpet, harp — non-idol au, reincarnation/soulmates au, magic au
> lyrics: "You never see his face; only the white hem of his robes, the way his hands grip the hilts of his dual swords as he twirls and dances alongside the river. You do not know him, this mysterious dancer; you know not the emotions that swell within you, that leave your chest sharp with pain. You do not know him, this river dancer, other than the fact that he is yours and belongs to a time before your blood turned black and the demon's mark was seared into your wrist.
Meanwhile, shrouded in mist, unknowing who is truly friend or foe, Lee Chan is set up for a blind date by his company's ceo. (or: a my demon au)"
Hi! you might see multiple requests from me in the future. Anyway can I request a IG AU for carlos Sainz and reader where her best friend took a photo of her holding multiple positive pregnancy tests and is in shock and posted it to the readers story so everyone is in shock thinking that the reader is pregnant, carlos + other drivers think she’s pregnant too. But it just turns out the bestie is pregnant and the reader and her bestie unfollowed the besties husband so the friends can know about the pregnancy and surprise the besties husband. Im so sorry if that did not make sense it was long. Ignore this if you want❤️
if you’re also able to tag me if you do post this it would be amazing?❤️ have a wonderful week
Carlos Sainz x wife!Reader - Social Media AU
y/nsainz posted a story
*y/nsainz’s story is no longer available*
y/nsainz
Liked by carlossainz55, f1wagupdates, and 372,865 others
y/nsainz surprise! i’m not pregnant. while i want to thank everyone for the well wishes, those pregnancy tests belonged to a friend and i have no idea how they even ended up on my story. carlos and i hope to extend our family in the future but a baby sainz has not yet been conceived. that being said, the outpouring of support that we and our hypothetical child received makes us more certain than ever that any child we bring into this world will be surrounded by love ❤️
View all 2,194 comments
carlossainz55 fingers crossed i find out about our baby before instagram does next time
y/nsainz you can’t hold that over me because there is no baby to find out about in the first place
carlossainz55 we can change that 😏
f1wagupdates the rollercoaster of emotions i just experienced 😵💫
carlossainz55 you and me both
y/nsainz
Liked by carlossainz55, landonorris, and 425,938 others
y/nsainz baby sainz coming soon (for real this time)
View all 2,867 comments
landonorris are you sure?
charles_leclerc maybe you should double check just in case, we don’t want a repeat of babygate
y/nsainz i’m pretty certain that the little feet kicking my organs every two seconds very much belong to the very real baby currently growing in me
f1wagupdates oh my god it’s really happening! we’re getting a baby sainz 😭
tifositalking i’m almost waiting for someone to jump out and yell “punked”
feralferrari right? i have trust issues after what happened the first time 🫣
carlossainz55
Liked by y/nsainz, scuderiaferrari, and 964,273 others
carlossainz55 fake baby sainz may have caused mass chaos but it also made us realize how much we want an actual baby sainz
View all 3,815 comments
scuderiaferrari congratulations to you both! maybe we should have kept the baby clothes for a little longer
landonorris my godchild 🧡
y/nsainz says who?
landonorris please, i already got them a miniature version of my race suit
charles_leclerc congrats mate! uncle charles reporting for duty 🫡
carlossainz55 thank you, lord perceval! we will make sure to remember that when it’s time to change diapers
Hello hello! I would like to request a Hobie fic if that’s okay! If the concept makes you uncomfortable in any way shape or form I completely understand if you delete this or refuse. But I think the idea of Hobie getting baby fever after babysitting Mayday is so sweet. Him envisioning a little you and him running around with both of your features and he just scoops you up in a kiss, and shyly tells you about how he’s been thinking about how he wants a baby with you (I hope that’s not too uncomfortable or weird or strange!! Thank you for reading and I hope you’re having a good day/evening!!)
Ajsljdldnlsnldnldn this ask got me feral™ Ilysm
The Pitter Patter of Little Feet
Soft!Hobie Brown x Fem!Reader
Because I'm tired of repeating myself: HOBIE IS AGED UP IN THIS FIC
TW/CW: Hobie being a secret softie, baby fever, NSFW, oral Fem! Receiving, punk with a heart of gold spray paint, Peter knowing things™, pregnancy mentions, babies, talk of babies, oh, and Mayday's here, too!
All characters stated in NSFW situations in my fics are all aged up or of age.
MINORS DNI: I AM NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR CONTENT YOU CONSUME
🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸
"Oi, like this." Hobie laughed at the toddler sitting on his chest, staring down at him as he laid on the carpet of he and his girlfriend's shared flat.
"Ho..." He started.
"Hoooo..." Mayday coo'd.
"Bieeee." He smiled, his mouth spread in a wide grin.
"Beeeeeee!" She squealed, clapping her pudgy little hands.
"Now say it: Hobie."
"Hah-buh." Mayday giggled.
"Ah, close enough ya li'le runt!" Hobie laughed, sitting up so Mayday was laying in his lap, tickling her little rolls on her tummy. "Ya lucky you're so cute, kid!"
Mayday grabbed his shirt and pulled herself up, looking at him with a happy smile, her unruly red-brown hair bobbing.
Hobie sighed as he looked down at her, huffing a small chuckle. "I swear, if I--"
"Had one of your own?" Peter B grinned, leaning on the pillar that was in between the kitchen and living room.
"Uh--" Hobie coughed awkwardly. "I wasn't..."
"Hey, man, I'm not surprised Mayday would make you want one of your own." Peter laughed, walking over and scooping up his young daughter.
"My little girl here seems to give people baby fever! Must be her mom's genes or something! Or maybe... Just that cute little face! Om nom nom!" Peter grinned, pretending to nibble on Mayday's cheeks, earning a loud squeal as she kicks and squirms from her father's affections.
Peter chuckled and tucked her safely into the chest harness, smirking at Hobie as he stood.
"You notice how Jess got pregnant not too long after I asked her to watch Mayday? I mean, it could be a coincidence... Or canon event."
Hobie groaned at his word usage, handing Peter the diaper bag. "Ugh, you sound like the ol' stiff at HQ."
"Hey, just making a joke. I gotta compensate for Miguel's lack of humor somehow."
Hobie shoved his hands in his pockets, sighing as he looked off to the side.
Peter put his hand on the taller man's shoulder. "Seriously... Are you thinking about having a baby?"
"I mean..." Hobie struggled, his jaw tensing. "I'd be lyin' if I said I didn't, but..."
"You're not sure you wanna bring it up with your girl?" Peter supplied, Mayday's tiny hand gripping his fingers.
"I mean, Pete, we're not even hitched." Hobie shrugged.
"Not all couples need to be married before having a runt of their own."
"Yeh, yeh..." Hobie sniffed, trying to sound bored.
"All right, I'm heading out. See ya, Hobie. I owe ya one." Peter grinned.
"That ya do, bruv."
🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸
When you came home, Hobie was sitting on the settee by the window, strumming idle notes on his guitar, bobbing his head to a tune only he could hear.
You dropped your purse and keys on the dining table next to the door, and slipped off your shoes.
Slowly, you dragged your feet over to the sofa opposite of the settee Hobie was currently perched on.
"You 'right, luv?" Hobie asked, setting the guitar down and walking over to kneel next to the sofa.
"Work sucked." You groaned into the cushions.
Hobie put his hand around the back of your neck and started to massage the tension there with the pads of his fingers, urging a gentle sigh from you as you turned your head to look at him.
"Better?"
"Very much so."
Hobie grinned at you, and barely gave you a moment before picking you up and swinging you in a circle, earning a shriek and laugh from you.
"Hobie! You shit!" You laugh, slipping your arms around his neck as he set you on your feet, looking up at him with those big gorgeous eyes.
"Had to see you laugh, luv." Hobie said, leaning down to bury his face in your neck, breathing into your perfume. "Laughter is the best medicine, as they say."
You sigh and relax into the embrace, a gentle pause in the conversation.
"Where's Mayday? You said you were watching her for Peter, today."
"He came 'n got her." Hobie mumbled.
"...What's wrong?" You ask, reaching up to flick one of his large fluffy dreads.
".... Nothin'."
"Hobie Brown, it is not nothin'." You say suspiciously, pulling back so he looked you in the eyes. "What's on your mind? You can talk to me, babe."
"Yeah, but..." Hobie looked at the carpet in hesitation.
"Hobie..." You prod.
"I..." Hobie suddenly felt a paralyzing feeling seize his gut. He could face Osborne's oppressive regime with a grin, can of paint, and a middle finger straight up... But this? This topic was...
"Sweetheart." You say, touching his cheek.
"Do y' wanna have a baby?" He blurted.
You blink up at him owlishly.
"What?"
"I... Shit." Hobie groaned, separating from you as he marches back and forth, a hand to his head.
"Hobie--"
"Nah, nah, forget I said anything. I just..." He stood, his back to you, his shoulders slumped defeatedly.
"They'd look good, y'know? If we had a kid. Cute. Your eyes, your smile. That giddy li'le laugh o' yours. I just... Dealing with Mayday feels... I d'nno. I just..."
"Hobie... Are you saying you... You want to have a baby? With me?" You ask softly, touching his shoulder.
"Yeah."
You chew the inside of your cheek, thinking.
Fuck it.
"...All right. We can handle it. I make enough money, we have enough room..." You start rattling off stuff, going into planning mode.
Hobie looked at you, his jaw dropped as you started muttering to yourself. It sounded like you were already four steps ahead, planning out budgets, where to get stuff for a baby, working on a schedule that you can juggle with work after the baby is born...
He felt his head catch in his throat as he watched you put your hand to your chin, a gesture you often made when you were putting serious thought into something.
He grinned widely, grabbing you by the waist and practically tackling you onto the sofa.
"Wha--Hobie! I was thinking!" You protest.
"I know." Hobie says, claiming your mouth in a hungry, heated kiss.
The passion of which he moved robbed you of breath. He pulled your hair out of its confines, rubbing his fingers through the silken strands, the healed callouses on his fingertips finding refuge there among the softness.
When he pulled away, he smirked at you, his dark eyes alight with a spark. A spark you knew well.
A spark that meant Hobie was up to no good.
"H-Hobie--" You gulp.
"Ay, you got me all in a sitch here, yeh?" Hobie grinned. "Can't jus' say all that, look at me with those big eyes and not expect me to wanna..."
His other hand went to your jeans, tugging the button out of the loop and pulling the zipper down, his body slipping off the couch to kneel between your legs, tugging the denim down your hips and tossing the fabric onto the coffee table. He didn't bother with your socks.
He smirked with satisfaction when he saw the damp patch in the lace of your panties.
"Been thinkin' about me, luv?" He hummed, looking up at you. "Work have you that stressed? Need a lil' relief?"
His fingers slid up your bare thighs, teasing the edges of the panties that hugged the plush of your thighs, and you shuddered.
"You... Ugh, I don't know what to do with you." You groaned, dropping your head back, sighing at the ceiling.
"Oh, but I know what to do with you." Hobie purred, pushing the damp fabric aside, blowing a cool puff of air over your damp slit.
You shivered. "You little..."
You wished your voice didn't sound so breathy.
"You always do that! Why--" The moment you looked down and met his eyes, his mouth latched straight onto your clit, growling and sending a wave of vibrations that made your toes curl and a shocked mewl tear from your throat as the piercing in his tongue added extra sensations.
One of Hobie's favorite hobbies was to eat you out. He could sit for hours and do it, licking and kissing until you couldn't feel your limbs from how overstimulated you became.
Your taste was probably the only hard "drug" he could ever imagine getting addicted to.
He licked a broad fat stripe up, then down, bringing his thumb to push against your clit as he delved his almost-too-long tongue into your hole, writhing and pressing, rolling and tugging as your muscles attempt to draw him further.
He pulled his tongue out and licked upwards, pushing not one, but two of his fingers inside of you, curling them upwards as his other hand pressed down on the lowest part of your belly in tandem with each crook of his digits and flick of his tongue.
You writhed, hands going to tug at the bushy dreads on his scalp.
"Hobie--fuck!" You cried out, rolling your hips to meet him, your orgasm already beginning to swell, burning low in your belly.
"Go on, luv. Cum f' me." Hobie growled, pressing his piercing up at your clit, his chin already dripping with your juices.
You whine, a hiccup bubbling out of you as he adds a third finger, thrusting them in and out of you at a pace that had the edges of your vision going fuzzy.
"Hobie!" You cry out, arching your back into him as he fucks you with his tongue and hands, pressing down on your skin to make the sensations more intense; your orgasm cresting and shattering your dam of restraint.
You dropped, limp onto the cushions as Hobie sucked his fingers clean, licking his lips and wiping his chin dry, licking up the remainder of your slick that was still on his face.
"Right, luv. Let's get down to business." He chuckled, climbing over on top of you, hastily unbuckling the belt, tugging his torn jeans down his hips, his boxers going along with, revealing how eager he was for you.
You know we need more little alt girls. Tattoos, goth makeup, torn fishnets, punk aesthetics... they all just go so beautifully with diapers and baby toys. The inherent clash makes them all the more fun.
*Hobie Brown (Across the Spider-Verse) x POC Reader
*Summary: You come home from work to find a little white baby crawling around your apartment. Cue the baby fever.
*Warnings: Swearing, sex jokes. Let me know if I missed anything.
Tip Jar
**********
Dating Spider-Punk was definitely a wild experience; you never knew what to expect from the man. You could tell he was definitely the “Cool Cousin” to the younger Spiders, especially with how often one (or more) of the teens would stop by randomly with him. What you definitely didn’t expect was coming home from work to find a little white child literally climbing the walls of your flat.
“Hobie?” You called out, putting your bag down as your eyes followed the movement of the random baby.
“Yeah, babes?” Hobie was busy in the kitchen, not paying attention to whatever Spider-Menace he had brought back this time. Gwen you could handle, after all she was a teen and could (mostly) handle herself, but a literal baby? Nah, he had some explaining he needed to do.
“Whose white baby is in our flat right now?”
“Don’t know whatcha mean.”
“What do you mean you don’t- Hobie, there’s a little red headed baby here! I think I’d remember if I’d seen her before. And I know for a fact I didn’t have her.”
“Oh, right, that baby. That’s Mayday, little anarchist,” Hobie said,
“That explains nothing, Hobie. Who the hell is Mayday?”
“Relax, babes. Peter asked me to watch her while he’s on a mission.” Normally you loved Hobie’s couldn’t-be-bothered attitude, but you needed a little more information here. You sighed heavily, cueing Hobie into your annoyance. “Right, right. Peter’s another Spider, Mayday’s his kid, he got sent on a mission on his wife would probably kill ‘im if he took Mayday on another one.”
“And she ended up in our flat how?”
“I was the only one available. C’mon, look at the little rebel. How could you say no to this?” As soon as he asked the question, Mayday dropped into his hands from the ceiling. He held her up to your eye level, and the little smile she gave you with those puppy dog eyes just made you give in.
“Alright, fine, but I’m not changing any diapers.”
“Told ya she’d let you stay,” Hobie told Mayday as you walked past him to get something to snack on. You shot him a withering glare, only for him to give you his small smile that always gave you butterflies. You couldn’t let him know that though, so instead you rolled your eyes at him.
**********
You always thought you were immune to the baby fever your friends always talked about as you got older, but you were beginning to see the appeal in this whole thing as you watched Hobie with Mayday. There was just something about the soft way he talked to her, the way he carefully watched her as she crawled around and up your walls. Don’t even get me started on the way he carried her on his hip when he went about doing things around your flat.
You kept stealing glances at him while you worked on your laptop. You’d been with Hobie long enough that you’d seen him interacting with kids, but those were mostly young teens. There was just something different about seeing Hobie with an actual bay that got your heart racing. He sat there with Mayday perched on his knee, bouncing her as he read some children’s book that Peter must have sent her with. No way. No way you were having baby fever. You didn’t even want kids, right?
You could feel your face heating up, trying to focus your attention back on the work in front of you. You just needed to get this report done, and then you could deal with whatever feelings you were having about Hobie. Specifically, Hobie with a baby. Hobie with your baby? Your mind provided you with a brief flash of Hobie carrying a child with his hair and your eyes, maybe a little leather jacket. Now that would be cute, with little combat boots-
Woah, you need to calm down. You shook your head, your typing starting back up again. You just needed to finish this report and-
“You aight there, babes?” Hobie asked, shifting Mayday to stare at you with him. “Thought you were s’posed to be working.”
“I am working, what’re you on about?”
“Nah, you’re not working, you keep lookin’ at me.” His slight taunt sent a shiver through you, but your annoyance was greater right now.
“Maybe I’m just lookin at the baby, ever think that?”
“Nah, not with that look you got goin on.” Your face felt like it was on fire, so you did what any reasonable person would do: you shut your laptop and stood up, preparing to go hide away in your room while you tried to calm down and finish this report. As you walked to your room, you heard Hobie behind you. “Aw, c’mon babes, I didn’t mean nothin’ by it-”
The door clicked closed before you could hear the end of his sentence. You let out a heavy sigh, heavier than you’d originally intended. Right, all you needed to do was focus on your work and then you could go back out to Hobie and Mayday. Maybe working on client portfolios for a little while would help clear your mind.
**********
Eventually, your work was done and you couldn’t just hide from your boyfriend for the rest of the night. When you opened the bedroom door to find Hobie smiling down at Mayday softly snoring away in his arms. You had half the mind to just turn around and walk back into the room, needing to get away from the heart melting moment in front of you. It was too late though, Hobie had already spotted you. “Done with work now?”
“Yeah, just had to finish up some things.” Hobie hummed in acknowledgement, watching as Mayday slept. He looked back up at you, that softness still in his eyes. “Babes, could you do me a favor?”
You gave an exaggerated sigh, sitting next to him. “Alright, what is it?”
“Just hold her for a second, alright? I’ve hadta use the bathroom for ages now.”
“What? Hobie!” It was too late, Hobie had already placed the little redhead in your lap, leaving you with no choice but to watch as he nearly ran to the bathroom. You huffed, looking at the child in your lap, still snoozing away. “It’s kinda amazing you slept through that.”
You adjusted so you were holding Mayday the way Hobie had been before he abandoned you both, looking down at the sleeping child. Her red curls were mussed up, and you wondered just how your own kid would look fresh from a nap.
“Guess you’re not so bad, kinda cute if anything,” you mumbled to her as she shifted in your arms. For a split second, you were scared she was going to wake up, but your fears were quickly allayed as she settled down again. “I’m still gonna kill ‘im though, with his damn tricks.”
There wasn’t much you could do with this child just sleeping in your arms, so you let your mind wander as you just held her. You still had to make dinner, you didn’t know how long Mayday would be here for, you were really glad you had the day off tomorrow. Eventually, as you continued your rambling of thoughts, you started humming just to add some background noise to the too quiet flat.
“I knew you’d like her, you should see the headache having her ‘round gives Miguel,” Hobie’s voice jolted you out of the little bubble you’d managed to be in. You barely managed to control the little jump you had. “Love to imagine what kind of damage our kid would do.”
“Jeez, Hobie, give me a warning next time,” you said before taking a second to register what he’d just told you. Your wide eyes followed him as he hopped over the back of the couch, putting his arm around you as he settled in. “Wait, whatcha mean ‘our kid’?”
“You know, for someone with a fancy job ‘n all, you think you’d get the simple things. Y’know, a kid we have. Like, together.”
“You want a kid with me?” You asked, still dumbfounded by how casual he was about all this. Sure, you were pretty sure Hobie was endgame for you, but he wasn’t the type to normally talk about all this. Now that you thought about it, this was exactly the way he’d drop this kind of news on you. You really weren’t sure why you were so surprised at first.
“Yeah, course I do. I mean, long as you wanna have one. I know we haven’t talked ‘bout it much, but ever since this little menace popped up I been thinking ‘bout it,” Hobie started rambling, his normally cool facade cracking just the slightest bit until he saw the smug little smile on your face. “Never mind, I change my mind.”
“Oh c’mon, let me enjoy you being a lil sappy, it never happens!” You laughed, leaning your head on his shoulder. That was a lie, Hobie was soft with you more than he’d care to admit. And lord knows he wouldn’t admit it in front of anyone else.
“Alright, I change my mind back.”
“You never changed it in the first place,” you teased. “Do you know when Peter’s supposed to be back?”
“Why, you excited to start tryin’?” There was the Hobie you were used to. You just rolled your eyes, trying to ignore the heat rising in your face. You looked down at the sleeping child in your arms, only for Hobie to tilt your chin back up to look at him. The warmth in his eyes made your heart melt, even as he had that cocky little smirk on his lips. You leaned up slightly, trying not to jostle Mayday, as you gave him a quick kiss. “Right, yeah, I’ll see if I can get hold of Peter.”
//Reader is a mom of twins, Fluff, Domestic feelings, Punk!Miguel is called Miggy here, Mateo and Gabriella are both 1 year old.
A/N:Im gonna take a break from Child's Play and write simple scenarios for a while.
Juggling two jobs isn't always easy.
Your first one is to be a mother and the other a spider hero.
You love your family, you really do, but sometimes it takes a lot to handle twins who have endless energy.
Miguel and Miggy take notice of this, ever since you got pregnant with their baby, they do everything they can to make you comfortable.
Now you gave birth to two energetic children with bountiful energy left to spare, and sometimes they envy them for it.
Kids aside, you were their main priority.
So the next thing you know is that Miguel notifies you to go on a dimension where a hotel stands against luxurious sands of the beach.
You thought it's a mission, but you got surprise when Miggy said that you needed a day off and both him and Miguel could take care of the kids while you relax in the beach resort.
You almost cried from their care for you, and after packing some clothes and necessities, you bid them farewell and give each one a good luck kiss.
And good luck is what they desperately need.
"Mateo! You don't want to get set on fire, do you?" Miggy said as he rushed to Mateo, who was fiddling around the stove.
"Come here, Gabriella, come to Papa pleasseee." Miguel begged Gabriella, who's crawling upside down on the ceiling. They love their kids, but they sometimes wish they didn't get their spider genes.
The house was a mess, and children toys scattered around where Miggy and Miguel stepped on Lego too many times to count.
Diapers were scattered on top of cabinets and the sofa.
A random banana peel is on the floor, and poor Miguel slipped on making Miggy laugh but was cut short since Mateo tried to eat the peel.
They wished you were here to give more good luck kisses.
Both Miggy and Miguel looked at the time, and it was only starting on lunch, meaning they still had bathe and feed the kids.
"Dibs on making the food" Miggy started
"Wait Wha- Since when did we do dibs?" Miguel questioned
Miggy looked him dead in the eyes.
"Since now." With that, he gave a babbling Mateo to Miguel's arms and head straight to the kitchen.
He sighed, too tired to fight back, so now he's stuck with shower duty.
While he carried Mateo, Miguel summoned a web to stick at the back of Gabriella.
"Where do you think you're going, young lady? come on now" he said as he smiled when Gabriella tried babbling a response.
While Miguel made sure the water was warm, Miggy was busy trying to fry egg while trying not to burn it too much, but it's getting difficult with flying oil trying to attack him. He may be spiderman but spiders ain't immune to frying oil.
Maybe he should have stuck with shower duty.
Miguel was doing better than he thought, kids love taking a bath, especially with their glowing and squeaky bath toys.
Miguel chuckled as the two started babbling at each other as if having a conversation, which, in their case, their probably are.
□■□■□■□■□■□■□■□■□■
A few minutes had passed, and Miggy called him down for lunch, Miguel then took the towels hanging beside the bath and dried them both with a bit of difficulty.
Miguel wrapped Mateo with a towel as he put a diaper on Gabi.
But as he took off his focus on Mateo, He saw this as a chance to run butt naked downstairs.
Miguel noticed it too late and tried calling Mateo back, but as he was busy trying to get him, Gabriella started crawling up against the wall again.
"Mat!- wait no- Gabi come down! "
As Miggy sets down the baby plates, he hears a commotion uptairs, deciding to check it but instead getting surprised with Mateo running up to him with nothing but a towel on his head.
Miggy chuckled as he connected the dots on what's Miguel panicking about.
"Come here, Mi pequeño alborotador." He took Mateo in his arms and wrap him properly with his towel.
Miguel went downstairs with a fully dressed Gabi and set her down on the baby chair, while Miggy volunteered to dress Mateo up.
Miguel took the fry egg and smashed apples with yoghurt in the side, and lay it down on both plates of Gabi and Mat. Since teeth are starting to grow, they might as well experience using them.
□■□■□■□■□■□■□■□■□■
"On three," Miggy started
"One..."
"Two......"
"Three!" Both Miggy and Miguel exclaimed as they race each other on who can put the diaper on the babies the fastest.
The siblings laughed at their dads fiasco.
Mateo on Miggy's side and Gabi with Miguel.
"I WIN." Both Miggy and Miguel exclaimed, showing off their work with his other.
"You? Win? the sticker isn't even stuck well." Miguel commented on Miggy's work, and he was right since the sticker on the side of the diaper is loosely coming off.
"Ok, Mr. Perfectionist, how bout you spread the baby powder next time?" Miggy retorted back. And he was also right seeing there's still baby powder scattered around Gabi's legs.
"But you know what? Maybe try not burning your eggs next." Miguel stated, thinking back about the scorch marks on the eggs.
Gabi and Mateo started giggling at their fathers bickering.
"YOU WANNA GO AT ME OLD MAN?" Miggy challenged
"HAH! YOU WOULDN'T EVEN STAND ONE PUNCH"
"YEA? TRY M-"
□■□■□■□■□■□■□■□■□■
"Here's your cocktail ma'am." A waitress from the resort offered you a drink while you sat down by the beach, nothing but a bikini on.
"Oh! Thank you so much. " You received the cold drink in your hands as you thanked the person as they left and started sipping on it.
You sighed out in relief. You should really thank your husbands again for scheduling this day off for you. You're sure their doing alright since your spider-mama senses didn't go off.
With that reassuring thought, you went back to relaxing, enjoying the breeze, the caws of seagulls, and the warm sunlight.
□■□■□■□■□■□■□■□■□■
"Twinkle twinkle little star, how I won-"
"That's the best you could do?" Miguel interrupted Miggy's singing
"Got better ideas, old man?"
"Yea, how bout you shut your big ass mouth, for all I care your voice makes them cry even more." Miguel deadpanned as he bounced Mat in his arms, trying to make him sleepy.
After the two stopped their bickering, they knew it's time for the babies to sleep.
After endless crying, both twins finally slept, and after a few hours, they knew you'll come back soon from your vacay.
And come back, you did, since they see a glowing portal opening in front of their bed, and out you came from, you see both Miguels waiting for you.
"Mi vida! How was your day off?" Miguel greeted you with a kiss on your lips.
"It was amazing! the food was great and so was the view!" Miguel beamed at your comment, happy that you enjoyed yourself.
"That's nice to hear, tesoro. The kids are fed and asleep soundly. " Miggy greeted you with a hug.
You praised them for their hard work and dedication to give kids a good time.
With that, the three of you prepare for bed, you in the middle as usual, caressing both heads of your husbands, until the three of you finally closed eyes.
Maybe you have three jobs
A Hero
A Mother
And a Wife
Nonetheless, you were happy with what you had and you couldn't ask for anymore.
*bursts out laughing* Oh my god, they didn't! They actually made you ask your parents for permission to babysit you? *wipes tear from eye* That's the most hilarious thing I've heard all week! *chuckles*
I can just picture the look on your parents' faces when you came to them with that request. *smirks* Their grown-ass college son, begging for a couple of young punks to be his babysitters like he's some kind of helpless toddler. *shakes head* They must have been so proud of their little boy, all dressed up in his tighty whities and ready to be supervised by the big kids! *laughs*
*leans in close* And the fact that you actually went through with it, champ? *tuts disapprovingly* That just shows how completely under their control you are. *smirks* I mean, really - what self-respecting man would ever agree to be babysat by his own cousin and some random friend? *scoffs* But I guess when you're as easily embarrassed and submissive as you are, you'll do just about anything to avoid making a fuss, huh sport?
*puts arm around shoulder* Well, I hope you're ready for a whole new level of humiliation now, kiddo. *grins* Because something tells me your new "babysitters" are going to have a field day with you. *chuckles* They'll probably make you do all sorts of degrading things, like wear a diaper and suck on a pacifier while they watch cartoons and drink beer. *laughs*
*winks* And the best part? You'll just sit there and take it like the good little boy you are. *smirks* Because as long as they keep you in a constant state of embarrassment, you'll be too meek and pathetic to ever stand up for yourself. *chuckles* It's the perfect system - they get to have their fun, and you get to be the butt of every joke and prank they can think of!
*pats back patronizingly* So buckle up, champ - you're in for a wild ride as the neighborhood's resident man-baby. *grins* And if you're really lucky, maybe your babysitters will even let you stay up past your bedtime and watch them play video games in your tighty whities. *laughs heartily* That is, if you promise to be a very good boy and not have any accidents in your pull-ups! *winks and ruffles hair*
Reader must leave for a work emergency and Hobie must remain in charge of his little daughter, will he have difficulties when the arachnid duty calls him or will it be a father-daughter adventure of which they will be accomplices?
I LITERALLY RUN TO WRITE THIS —🫀
This was so adorable! I changed some things around hope you don't mind ❤️ I tried making their names vague but it's literally impossible for this fic, I hope thats ok. thank you for the lovely prompt!
Pairing: Hobie Brown x fem! Reader/ Spider-Punk x fem! Reader
Tags: No use of Y/N, no specific physical description of the reader, they have twin baby girls, CW food mention, FLUFF.
It's Fluffy Friday!
ʕ·ᴥ·ʔ
"Are you sure you'll be okay?" You kiss Ramona on her chubby cheeks whilst Hobie juggles Billie and your work bag in his arms. Helping him immediately, you take the bag from him in exchange for his daughter. It's the first time in months since you've gone to work, maternity leave (unfortunately) ending. You dread it, already missing your girls.
Hobie sees your frown, bouncing Mona in his arms, Billie gurgles in her sleep. "We'll be alright, love" he would embrace you if not for his twins occupying his arms.
You huff, puppy eyes staring at Hobie. You want to stay home, unfortunately diapers don't grow on trees. "I don't wanna go" pouting, you peck Billie's forehead, careful not to wake her. Hands circling Hobie's elbow with a steady hand.
"It'll be over before you know it. The girls and I will just be here waiting for you. Right, Mona?" Hobie addresses Mona, bouncing her in his arm, curls bouncing with the movement. She blows a raspberry, spit bubbles forming on her mouth.
The adorable sight would usually make you giggle but now you look forlorn while you wipe her tiny lips. "Mommy's gonna miss you" cooing at the bundle, you take a big whiff of her scent, (not the weirdest thing you've done since you've become a parent) "And you too" moving towards Billie, you caress her cheek with your index finger, she crinkles her nose in her sleep. It's uncanny how much she looks like Hobie when she makes that face.
"Oi, you forgot somethin'?" Hobie pipes up, brows furrowed.
"No, I was saving you for last" you finally crack a smile, kissing Hobie, pulling away for a second to stare at his eyes before you continue attacking his lips.
"Alright, you'll be late" he says against your lips. Hobie almost couldn't speak with you basically eating his face.
You pull away, sighing, taking a mental picture of your family. "Okay, call me if anything happens"
"Yes I will, they won't cause me any trouble. I've got 'em, yeah?" He fixes his hold on the babies. They've gotten quite heavy the last three months. "Be careful on your way"
"Okay, byeee" walking backwards to the door, your eyes glued to Hobie and your girls. It clicks closed.
Hobie turns back around when the door opens with you peeking through the gap. "Love," he says with a chuckle.
"Okay, bye for real this time" you do a flying kiss motion towards Hobie. The door closes for the second time.
Hobie expects the door to open again but it doesn't, he's so proud of your self restraint. Ramona takes his attention with a small whine, hand gripping his jumper. "You hungry? I think we've still got some roast beef here" he jokes, forgetting that you're not in the room with him. You would've laughed.
Guess you're not the only one missing someone. Hobie brings the twins on their Bassinets, Billie wakes up almost immediately when Hobie takes his arm away. His senses warn him of an impending loud cry. Eyes watering, lips trembling, Billie lets out a wail before Hobie could calm her down.
He takes her out of her bassinet, careful with her head, the loud noise ringing his ears. He can handle it, right? Hobie is Spider-Man after all. Glancing at Mona, he sees her slowly change her face from content to sadness. She probably just heard her sister and now she begs for his attention too.
"Crap" Hobie hisses when Mona cries in tandem with Billie. As if some cosmic entity wanted to torture him, his bracelet rings out, Miguel's booming voice startles his girls, they cry louder in his arms.
Oh it's gonna be a long day for him.
—
"I'm home!" You happily trot over to the living room, eyes searching for your family. "Hobie? Mona? Billieee?" You call out to them in a sing-song voice. Rattling the paper bag in your hand, you spot the bedroom door open, tiptoeing inside, melting at the scene.
Hobie sleeps with the twins on his chest, hands secured over their small backs. He looks exhausted with his wicks standing in different angles, shirt stained with milk and baby spit up. He has one sock on his right foot, the other nowhere to be found.
Dropping your bags on the floor, Hobie opens his eyes at the sound. You wince, feeling guilty you've woken him up.
"Sorry" whispering, you sit down on the edge of the bed, wiping his drool with your sleeve. "I've got take out" you beam at him with heart shaped eyes. Tilting your head to check on your girls, finding them both fast asleep. "You okay?"
"Peachy" he yawns, Billie snuggles closer to her dad while Mona holds Hobie's shirt with a strong grip. "That better be shawarma" he says with no ounce of anger, just fatigue laced in his voice. Hobie thinks it's all worth it though, all for his girls.
You chuckle quietly, leaning down to kiss Billie on her little beanie, tiny curls peeking out of her hat. Moving a bit, you peck Mona on the crown of her head, curls tickling your nose. Lastly, you cup Hobie's face with both hands, carefully avoiding hitting the twins with your elbow.
"It's shawarma from your favourite place" you say softly against his waiting lips.
"Thank fuck, love you" He leans up, meeting you halfway. Hobie will tell you about their little adventure after you give him some food.