#realizing I’m autistic

[thealternatemind]

after realizing I’m autistic my whole life makes sense

[listles-s]

man laios and toshiro's/shuro's dynamic is incredibly compelling to me on multiple levels

when you look at them, you can see the cultural and personal barriers that drive almost every single aspect of their relationship, both positively and negatively. laios is incredibly outspoken and driven by his passions, which he expresses freely even in the face of annoyance and/or criticism- he's allowed to be as authentically himself as he pleases, and it's this drive that allows him and the others to survive as long as they have, especially due to the fact that these passions and interests are intertwined with his skills as a dungeon diver. toshiro, in contrast, is incredibly reserved, not only due to his eastern upbringing but also his status as nobility- a combo of cultures that both demand that one save face, to avoid conflict at any cost, even at the expense of one's own feelings and individuality. this, in turn, has made toshiro the perfect samurai, as he's politely-spoken, agreeable, and an honorable, skilled man. both are also incredibly devoted to falin on different levels, having come to accomplish the same mission of her rescue despite drifting apart from the party.

on the flipside, it's these same strengths that cause them to clash- laios is outspoken but unable to truly decipher the emotions of others, leading to a lot of false assumptions and frustration from those who interact with him. toshiro is stoic but to the point of complacency, leading to a aggressively neutral disposition that's ushered by the needs and wants of others, rather than himself. neither man truly knows where they stand with the people important to them in their lives, and hold the ones that they do know how they feel with a fierce admiration expressed in ways that aren't always traditional.

in the end, they both share a growing feeling of isolation from other people that comes to a head when they meet again in the depths of the dungeon, and they both have different ways of coping with the frustrations that arise, seeing the other as only the things they have seen face to face.

it's laios' ability to express himself emotionally without consequence that sparks jealousy in toshiro, leading to a physical fight born out of miscommunication and envy. while toshiro is a driving force in the conflict, it should be noted that the actual fight is started by laios, breaking the dam of indirect communication through force. nothing is more direct than a slap to the face, and it's only after they start hitting each other that toshiro's true feelings come to light.

however, at the end of it all, toshiro is the one who stops torturing himself, listening to laios and giving him the bell, allowing laios and his party entrance into his homeland should they need it, and ultimately giving him support in his mission to defeat the dungeon mage, albeit in his own way. despite it all, they're still good friends with a conflict that boiled over, but came out the other end with a slightly better understanding of each other. the fight was painful for both of them, but it was a necessity for their dynamic to improve, and for them to be made aware of their faults and improve as individuals as well.

but also, if you think about it, their dynamic is literally just this

[vyrewolf]

When I step away from the show and think about cap I get really wrapped up in his tragic gay backstory and of course I love that but then I go back and rewatch the episodes remember the other reason I love cap which is that he is so silly!!! He is so silly and so very autistic to the point that even though there is no evidence to suggest it was on purpose it feels so very on purpose that I can only lead to believe Ben’s portrayal was influenced by other autistic characters and they just. didn’t realize. because there’s no way captain isn’t autistic have you seen the way that man unapologetically stims and structures his entire day he is so silly and I love him.

[millenianthemums]

parents of disabled kids will be like “we know our kid is disabled but we just won’t tell them about it. we don’t want them to think they’re less valuable than other kids. we don’t want them to feel limited by their disability, we want them to know they’re capable of anything.”

meanwhile those kids are growing up thinking “why is everything so much harder for me than it is for everyone else? there’s no reason i shouldn’t be able to just do this. i guess i’m just a failed, broken person.”

[nanowatzophina]

Hayden appreciation post

[gods-jester]

i love you ayda aguefort. i love you gorgug thistlespring. i love you zelda donovan. i love you figeroth faeth. i love my dimension 20 autism representation

[silvermoon424]

I made a small mistake at work today that my manager wants to talk with me about and I keep thinking I’ll be fired and yelled at. I’ve been reprimanded so often at other jobs- usually for my neurodivergent behavior- that getting any kind of criticism makes me so anxious.

[smply-sktchng]

tori summer

[soullessjack]

boycott fatigue is actually the stupidest fucking thing ever because how in the ever loving fuck are you experiencing “fatigue” from not going to Starbucks. how is not watching rushed cgi on disney+ and not eating a breaded slime nugget at McDonald’s “fatiguing” you. genuinely how fucking dare this even exist as a concept. entire bloodlines, children, newborns are dying slow and bloody and all of these companies are giving Israel the money to do that. they’re using YOUR fucking money to do this. and look, practically every war has been funded out of our pockets by a means we can’t fight around. almost all of the food and drink we have in the states is owned by some large corporation that makes it fucking impossible to not give them money because they are the sole providers. I understand there are some things we can’t boycott because of our own needs. but this isn’t basic needs that we are being asked to boycott. it’s fucking Disney+ and McDonald’s and Starbucks and a whole slew of luxuries that you’re not only capable of living without, but would actually be better off entirely without.

there’s been a lot of talk about how privileged we are to only be witnessing this human rights atrocity through phones or news and being able to get away from it with a button click and that’s entirely real, but the fact that somebody out here just felt soooo inconvenienced by not going to a drive thru for overpriced garbage that they literally coined the phrase “boycott fatigue,” is probably the biggest load of privileged dog shit I’ve seen in the past few days. do you want to know who’s actually experiencing fatigue right now? the millions of displaced families in Gaza without homes anymore. without any clean water to drink because it’s either been poisoned by the Israelis or contaminated with their peoples’ blood. the children without enough food to get by, or without any food at all. the injured and sick and disabled Palestinians who don’t have access to any medical aid for themselves because their hospitals and fuel trucks are being bombed. these people who have absolutely nothing but each other, and not even that in the worst circumstances, who can only keep walking for days on end, hungry and thirsty and in pain and unable to do anything about it. that is real fucking fatigue.

I understand we’re all seeing war crimes and death and atrocities that nobody should ever have to see and yes it’s difficult to process, but the people of Palestine are experiencing these atrocities in real time, every day, every hour. every ten fucking minutes a child dies. They aren’t even asking for help anymore. They’re only asking to be witnessed and remembered and for us to stop going to places that actively fund their deaths and you’re saying you just can’t because you’re exhausted by not going to that place? I know we’re all born and raised in a consumerist hellscape but you seriously need to get a fucking reality check if offering the bare minimum support to a dying people is ‘fatiguing’ to you. Jesus fucking Christ.

[no1ryomafan]

I know that every genre to ever exist is really just a ever growing evolution process, every single thing within a genre is influenced by each other somehow just each thing retools things to make it its own identity, so seeing overlap between things isn’t shocking but I gotta say: Mecha’s influencing each other will always fascinate me because the tiniest detail will be used in something that was ripped from another show. What do I mean by that? Well it’s only DAWNED ON ME that Roger’s watch in Big O is CLEARLY inspired off of Daisakus in Giant Robo!

This is such a obvious detail given Giant Robo is the mecha influence Big O takes-it wasn’t just “Batman but mecha”, it pulled a lot from this-and the robot itself feels inspired by Robo, but I hadn’t noticed the watch detail because of how it’s retooled in Big O.

In Giant Robo, the watch is used to command the robot, but in Big O, since Roger pilots the robot, he uses it just to call his robot, so it’s way more minor in that show but it’s still so clearly inspired off of Daisaku commanding Robo in battle.

It’s not only a homage but it’s making something new, for potentially maybe another mecha to pull from, and more to come after. This genre is so fucking COOL.

[cherrysnax]

im very silly but sometimes it annoys me when people don’t enjoy something the exact same way I do. and it’s suuuuch a bad trait and I’m working on it 😭

[reamed]

FUCCKKKKKKK 💣💣💣💥💥💥

[theloststarboy]

“Kili is hot.” Steve muttered 1/4 of the way into watching The Hobbit, with Eddie

“Kili? Really?” Eddie asked

“Yeah.” Steve paused and continued watching Fili and Kili realize that two of the horses were missing “he looks a bit like you.”

“Is this your round about way of saying that I’m hot?” Eddie asked

“Perhaps” he shrugged pressing a soft kiss to Eddie’s cheek “definitely” he laughed softly

[toomuchdivergentformyneuro]

autistic realization of the day:

every one who has ever said that i don’t feel a certain way or that i wont feel a certain way when it comes to specific situation that is only slightly different from all the situations like it, have been utterly joking and know that i will feel the same.

for example since that was very vague:

today, i was talking to my mom about how i’m gonna be sobbing my eyes out when my boyfriend and i meet next week, because of how happy i am.

she then makes a (not so obvious to me) joke about how we’ll probably be sick of each other at the end of the week, and keeps insisting that.

and i keep insisting, getting slowly more and more angry because i think she doesn’t think my feelings are very real, that i most definitely will not be sick of him, and will be entirely sad when he has to go away again.

then she said, “nah, i know you guys won’t be sick of each other” in a way that sounds as if it would be obvious to me.

and now, that has made me take a look at all the previous conversations and situations where this exact sorta thing happened, and the person i was having the convo with just never clarified, so i would get pissed at them and done with the conversation.

is there anything else that people have meant jokingly that i just missed all these years?

[tsukimefuku]

I think one of the weirdest things I do as a non-native English speaker is writing down on my notebook words I hadn’t yet read anywhere and I think sound pretty. Like making myself my own little personal collection of words to pull from when I’m writing something.

[lumiereandcogsworth]

as an autistic person i can only WISH that we got to end phone calls the way people do on tv. like have you noticed how NO ONE ever actually Ends The Conversation? they just fully hang up. it’ll be like “i can’t believe steve did that!” “i know.” “what are you going to say?” “…….. i’ll think of something.” [hangs up]. LIKE FJSKDJ that’s considered RUDE in real life but gosh what a dream. social niceties my beloathed. it DOES drive me nuts too, though. like girl you DID NOT complete the interaction. i hate even more when there’s like a dramatic moment and the person hangs up to prove an emotional point. like ???? HELLO??? this is like. they’re living the autistic dream of not conforming to social etiquette, BUT my autistic need to Follow The Rules is also soooo angry with them about it. truly cannot win here.