#self-eestem

[exidtual]

crying at work because i was serving this customer and after asking her if she needs anything else she said why did i disfigure myself & i look ugly like this. who else cant look in the mirror without rage and disgust 😂😂😂

[saw-bathroom]

I wanna die everytime I think I’m not enough

[punkeropercyjackson]

Lore of Lex de los Santos,my Pjo s/i

As asked by @comfortabletogether !!

Lex's full name is Alexandria and their chinese name is Xiá,they're blasian because i implemented so many asian aspects into their character it felt right

Specifically they're black-greek because Demeter is one of the many black gods and their godly parent and their mortal parent is Emil 'Xiaoyu' de los Santos,a chinese-dominican man who works at a boba shop chain called 'Bubble Buds'

Lex was born and raised in San Francisco but moved to El Barrio,New York in the beginning of Botl due to Emil's job transfering him and grew up taking guitar lessons

Lex is the same age as Percy,with a December 27th birthday,and got to Camp Half-Blood at 12 too.This is one of the many things they have in common:Lex and Percy also have the same sense of humor,poor social skills,merciless tendencies,emotional regulation issues,self-eestem problems,boundless kindness and uncorruptability.The difference is their attitudes-Lex is soft and shy with a hardcore inside,Percy is tough and mean with a soft inside.Their nicknames for eachother are 'Blue' and 'Bubbles'

Lex's powers are ultra chlorokinesis,geokinesis,built-in botany expertesee and eventual terraportation and they're the strongest mortal Demeter kid.They're as strong as Persephone herself

Lex's special interests are boba,dogs,video games,pastel things,kidcore,swords,the sea,nature and anarchy and they love fucking around with their friends and they're also a mom friend,a rollerblader and a guitarist because they took lessons and their colors are pink and green

Lex got to Camp Half-Blood a month before Percy,during The Gym Incident at Marigold Middle School when earlier that day Zach Matthews got rumors to spread about them by provoking them into punching him hard enough for him to bleed and a basilisk attacked at gym class later so Lex's powers activated to kill it on instinct,their eyes closed tightly as they did.They finally realized they have plant powers and Nona Peters,another bully of their's,started shrieking about how it's proof they were a freak all along so blinded by rage,they choked her with their vines until Coach Wilson snapped them out it and she sobbed in apology as they commanded for her to be released but didn't mean it.Teary eyed,Lex dashed to Principal Gonzalez's office to call Emil to pick them up and ask about their powers since they knew he'd know

Emil drove them to Camp Half-Blood as he exposition dumped about the greek mythos world and his past relathionship with Demeter,who did divine intervetion to get them there in just two hours instead of two days,and the first camper Lex met was Katie as they approached her asking for help.Katie guided them to Chiron then to Cabin 4 to meet their siblings:Konrad 'Kon' Henders,Luke's best friend,Billie Ng,a nonbinary grunge kid and Miranda Gardiner,who came in a bit late due to her hatred of demigodhood.Kon did a little joke about his and Lex's names which flashed them back to the gym and he profusely apologized but they refused to touch upon it again.Lex's things were brought to them in a box the next day in the morning by Hermes as Emil had been in such a rush he forgot to pack for them and Lex learned the daily routine of CHB

With an extra for them:Isolation.Lex was ignored by almost everyone at Camp Half-Blood due to their quiet nature and 'off' looks(read:blasian)so they settled into hanging out by themselves in the forest.It hurt them a lot but it wasn't like there was anything they could do and at least they had their siblings.Percy finally arrived once the month passed and they met at the strawberry fields,just the two of them,where he jokingly asked if the strawberries came in blue and Lex responded they could make them blue if he wanted and he was taken back and asked if they really could so they placed their hand on a large bunch and they slowy changed color.He asked what the difference was and they said they weren't sure as they hadn't eaten one before so they eat their first bluestrawberries together,them being mostly the same as regular strawberries except sweeter and juicier,and Percy asked Lex to hang out and spar with him later and they enthutiastically agreed and once he was out of line of sight as they waved goodbye,they squealed and jumped happily as they reached for their hair to stim,only to feel yellow roses in it that had bloomed-Another Demeter kid trait,symbolic flowers that meaned their strongest emotions.Yellow roses mean 'friendship'

Percy and Lex became official sparring partners and after a week of best friendship,Percy asked about everybody's treatment of them to try to help them show everybody how great they are and Lex melted down and a huge wall of flowers appeared inbetween them to seperate them.Percy managed to talk them down after they revealed the Gym Incident and comparing it to his own problems with bullies did the trick and their feelings turned romantic after that convo.During the week,Lex was also sent a celestial bronze heart shaped hairclip transforming sword called Rhodon and they always wear it or as they got older,have it cuffed to their battle jacket,and they got Miranda to chill out by talking things out with her and it's revealed she's just upset at being away from her stepmom and dad and dosen't want to be a half-blood so they help her get along with their siblings and Miranda in thanks shares an Erika and Annalise from Barbie Princess and The Pauper dolls set with them

Post-Tlt Som Lex is a lot happier than the Lex before and Emil notices it and chalks it up to their demigod experiences,which is very true in a way but not entierly.Kon however is the reverse and is majorly depressed because of Luke's betrayal and private reveal of what he was actually like the whole time i.e His grooming of Silena and brewing plans to destroy everything out of his own selfishness.He refuses to say what happened but turns out he didn't need to as Luke puts Percy on blast and Kon blacks out in emotional distress,Lex screaming out his name in terror for him.Earlier that summer,they'd been helping Percy care for Tyson as the only people at camp who liked him(wtf was Rick thinking with having Percy not like Tyson,it makes zero sense??????)and later,they become Thalia's best friend,giving her a tour around camp with Clarisse's help and approaching her at the Zeus Cabin specifically to befriend her out of hating seeing her so dehumanized by the campers into a paragon instead of a teenage girl

Thalia had instantly assumed Lex was a perfect prissy popular girl because of their aesthetic,Lex always dressing in pinks and greens with feminine hairstyles and tween makeup,but after actually talking to them,knew they were just a weird black girly girl so as a weird black trans tomboy,she decided to open up her time to them and they nicknamed eachother 'Thunder' and 'Petal'.Campers were afraid to be mean to Lex now with her and Percy constantly at their side but did ask them invasive questions about her they informed her about and so they stopped.Lex's egg was cracked by Thalia and they'd been going by they/them for years but never thought to research their gender and as it turns out,they're transmasc genderfluid and bigender and they came out to her and Percy as they hung out by the creek and once to him,Emil hit up Demeter to ask Aphrodite to give Lex their ideal voice for the one thing they wanted for a physical transition with the rest staying intact(Lex's original voice was Stephanie Sheh but now it's Nika Futterman for that rocker girl vibe)

Lex stayed over for winter break in TTC and stayed in touch with Percy and Thalia over the phone,the former also true for inbetween Tlt and Som,but all of them were flip phones because 2000s LMAO(Lex's was a Barbie one,Percy's was blue and seathemed and Thalia's was black and all convered in edgy stickers).Kon wasn't able to properly lead Cabin 4 so Katie took over and this summer is when Drew had arrived so the heads of Cabin 4 and Cabin 10 had a flirtatious pretend hate rivalry going on that flew over the heads of most campers but not Lex,who instantly clocked them upon witnessing extended interactions between them pretty easily.Drew latched onto Lex after finding out they're trans like her and Lex offered to be Nico's new big sister after briefly meeting him and growing some lavenders for him and handing them to him as they sweetly asked him to be nice to Percy and he happily agreed to and finding him sobbing his heart out at the kitchen to comfort him.They also made him strawberry milk tea and they chugged several cups together

Him running away and Thalia joining the Hunters broke their heart and they felt like a failure and unloved and had a hard time enjoying their birthday party but did manage to,it being helped by Thalia sneaking in that night to leave them a gift:A bag of stolen junk they'd said they wanted but couldn't afford and a sticky note that says 'I still love you,Lex.Always will but right now,i need to be away from what could give me power.Please understand and i didn't say it to your face because it hurt too much to - Your girl best friend forever,Thalia'.We finally get to the moving to NY part and Lex arrives a month early to the core plot once again,reuniting with Percy and the de los Santos and Jacksons become close as a whole and Lex helps Percy fight and later save the empousi and befriends Rachel instantly and there's a running gag of Lex and Percy talking on their Barbie flip phone and sea flip phone throught the Labyrinth quest and Lex actually lends a hand on it twice as they also and the rest of the camp help Kon put himself back together.Nico asks 'Is that...blue birthday cake?A-And.....Is Lex here?' in the last Botl chapter so Percy tells him to come in and says it looks like the three of them have a lot to talk about and Lex bolts into a now taller than them Nico's arms the second they saw him again and Nico hugs them back just as fiercely,laughing as they pepper his face all over in big sisterly/motherly kisses

Percy,Lex and Rachel attend Goode High together and it's widely know how close they are so they get dubbed 'The Loser Trio' and they reclaim it for themselves as a friendship name.They do charity events,go to riots/protests,on beach trips both for fun and cleaning,to the skatepark,to Bubble Buds,to the arcade,to thrift stores,to underground parties and shows,on petty crime sprees,on platonic study dates,on aquarium visits,have cartoon/movie marathons and do meme challenges.There's always a romantic edge to Perlex's moments together that dosen't exist with Rachel and she's more than happy with that because she's out there having lesbian adventures and ironically enough Annabeth makes the same mistake she did in canon only Lex is the object of Percy's affections and she's oblivious to Perlex out of her own cisheteronormativity and internalized lesbophobia hence why she dosen't bully Lex ever.Rachel is also how they found out about solarpunk although Thalia was Percy and Lex's introduction to punk culture as a whole but Rachel is who got them to GO punk and The Loser Trio is an afrosolarpunk friends trio too

They have a shared instagram account they use both for personal posts and activism and The Loser Summer™️ included Percy posting him piggybacking Lex and them grinning and Lex doing a peace sign and a plain pink heart emoji in the caption,them at Dairy Queen sharing food captioned 'at Dairy Queen with my Dairy King' and even a slideshow of them swapping clothes and hugging.There's even more of all three of them together and Nico gueststars sometimes as him,Percy and Lex spent the year between Botl and Tlo reconnecting and some of their fans even think he's their kid because they didn't reveal their ages for online safety and Rachel posts her girlsaga and girlbossing and girlfailures all around.Zach and Nona reappear,now a couple,at a Goode High and their school Lex refuses to remember the name of vs basketball game and apologize to them and they respond they'll never forgive them but can let them go.Tlo had Lex,Katie,Miranda,Billie,Kon,Drew and a-just-quit-the-Hunters-Thalia working as a team against the Titans Army in Manhattan with Lex as the leader and earning the reputation across Camp Half-Blood as Percy's righthand and equal in strength as they worked together too and they near biblically unleashed their Demeter powers,getting to meet their mom face to face at the end too and were given a gift in the form of Demeter blessing Rhodon as they kissed Lex's forehead,calling them 'The Heroine of Olympus' and Luke had been slayed by Percy briefly beforehand as Percy was the actual hero of the prophecy

Lex is bubbling with happiness until they see Percy and Annabeth are together now and it shatters them for a long while as their insecurities spill over.They pretend to be okay for Percy's and their other loved ones sake but they really aren't and are kinda worse than ever in fact and wilted flowers bloom where they step.They try to appreciate what they do have though and that includes Percy himself,still best friends til the end with him.Post-Tlo but pre-Percy dissaperance,Lex and Kon are sent on a quest by Demeter for Persephone's sake and it's to travel to Greece to retrive their Roots i.e Unlock their powers to their full potential and calm their agitated and hurt minds.The quest is succesful and includes all your usual Percyverse quest beats,the humor,the mythos shout outs,the aesthetics,etc and Persephone starts visiting CHB in the summer thanks to developing real siblinghood with the other eldest child of Demeter and the daughter of Demeter most similar to her and this is it's own solo book titled 'Lex de los Santos and the Persephone Times'.Once Percy is kidnapped by Hera,Lex resorts to an Animal Crossing addiction to distract themself at the same time them and Annabeth take over camp as co-leaders

This is when Lex learns the full details of her and Percy's relathionship and realizes she's abusive to him and is shocked to say the least.They don't tell anyone because Percy should be the first to know and make sure to keep their guard up around her and Tlh comes along so Lex forms friendships with The Lost Trio:Piper(onsight click and Lex helps her embrace butchness and Piper admires Lex's self-confidence),Leo(silly4silly weird4weird latino4latino but platonically and Lex is Leo's hypemanwoman while Leo is super appriciative of Lex)and Jason(had a crush on them that was extremely awkward for everyone involved and Lex didn't have to reject him outright because he got over them as he saw how much they love Percy and moved onto Leo).The Second Great Prophecy said 'Eight Half-Bloods Shall Awnser The Call' and those eight half-bloods are Percy,Lex,Annabeth,Jason,Piper,Leo,Frank and Hazel and Lex hops onto the Argo || without anybody knowing who The Eight are officially.Drew got her redemption-healing arc completed in Tlh and the quest for Buford has Buford running into her and Katie on their first date and Clarisse and Thalia lead CHB while Lex and Annabeth are gonna but follow the praetor route iykwim(they end up together at last since they'd been flirting since TTC)

Percy didn't remember anything except Sally at the beginning of Son but Lex slowly came back to them,once they bit into a strawberry at Camp Jupiter and it didn't taste quiet the same,a sadness she didn't yet understand washing over her.Hazel instantly went to talk to Lex when she spotted them in Moa due to Percy's talks of them and brought her over to Camp Jupiter's cat cafe for coffee and kitty playing and chatting.Once the whole gang borded the Argo || was when Percy and Lex reuinited,at night as Percy took care of the stables and Lex went out looking for her because not getting to talk to her all day and she ran up to them,squeezing them up into a hug and they yelped but hugged back in surprise.'Hey Bubbles!!' 'H-Hey Blue!*Laughs*Together again!' 'And not apart again.Wassup?'so they flopped down onto the hay and caught up.Nobody caught them because they woke up before anybody else and Annabeth got mad at Percy and scolded him for not staying the night with her and almost everyone found it funny except Lex,cringing to themself the whole time in silent panic at what she'd do after.Percy is jealous of Jason's attraction to Lex as a turned tables moment for the Lex and Annabeth situation and his insecurities come how he's darkskin and Jason is lightskin and how Percy's always branded a troublemaker to the point of convincement while Jason's a lifelong golden boy

No Hazel love triangles and Sammy and her didn't know eachother so Lex accompanies them on their Echo quest and thinks 'Super Sized Mcshizzle' is peak comedy and actually gave themself a stomach cramp from holding back their laughter.Percy is determinated to save Nico as there were no useless retcons between them and Lex and Hazel feel the same so the three of them sneak off to save him and they succeed and the four of them are an official certified quartet by the end of Boo with how close they are,them being 'The Outcast Godlings'.Lex gets the chance to tell Percy what's going on between her and Annabeth in the pre-climax of Moa and Percy's first reaction is denial until Lex points out in explicit detail how abusive she is to her and he can't deny any of their questions to any of the non-existent improvement in how she treats her and this also leads to Lex confessing their own feelings on pure accident('You don't have to choose someone you DON'T want to!I'm happy you chose me as your best friend though.......That you chose me,even if it's not how i wanted you too')and Percy is shocked beyond words as her brain switches and connects the dots on her own Lex feelings.Hazel and Lex fall into Tartarus right after though so they don't have time to resolve things just yet

Lex does their best to protect and take care of themself and more importantly Hazel in Tartarus and Hazel is able to unlock her powers to the fullest as The Princess of The Underworld and The Unknown down there.Back on earth,Percy got the Hecate Mist storyline and is stressing out over Lex,over Hazel,over Annabeth,but does her best to lead and the Percabeth breakup comes when Annabeth insults Lex out of jealousy over how important they are to Percy as she realizes they're an actual threat the whole time to their relathionship and Percy is so infuriated she breaks up with her on the spot and stomps away(black and blue demonias gifted to her by Beckendorf pre-death btw).'I'm not letting anybody else tell me what path i should take anymore.I get to choose my own present and my owm future even if it'll never change the past.I was never meant to be restrained and now i know what really means'-Percy Jackson,House of Hades

Hazel and Lex get out of Tartarus and are instantly fussed over by Nico and Percy but also all the other Eight and Reyna except Annabeth,who keeps her distance.Percy and Lex spend Boo as a battle couple who flirt nonstop,subconciously on Lex's end and very intentionally on Percy's end,and after the final fight with Gaea,Lex dyes their bangs forest green as symbolism for their completed self-love arc and it's topped off by Percy asking them out right before lunch time as they sit at a unique table-The Poseidon table but with them,Nico,Hazel,Tyson,Grover,Rachel,Katie,Jason,Leo,Frank,Piper and Clarisse.Everyone can tell his intentions except Lex as they sideeye eachother as they follow him to the forest and they flop down on the grass together to eat the picnic he made and once they finish it all,Percy confesses to Lex and they're too stunned to interrupt him as he turns into a rambling mess of all he loves about them until they snap out of it and flop down on top of him,craddling his face and confessing back just as tenderly so they both grin and he initiates their first as they kiss back.Pink and blue roses bloombed around them

Sally adopted Nico and Hazel and Percy,Lex and Rachel went back to Goode High for their senior year together.A year passes and they manage to graduate but Percy and Lex also decide college isn't for them and Lex and Emil move into La Residencia Jackson due to Sally's eldest son dating Emil's only child and what good friends Emil and Sally already are.Instead of T.oa,we get Tales of Dead Seas aka Tods,a one year later Hoo sequel that's four books and takes place over four years for that og Pjo feel including the return of the chapter titles and has the Outcast Godlings as the mcs and the books are in order called:Elysium on Earth,Petallic,Arcane Rot and Unmythologizable.Nico and Hazel attend a Special ED school,Sally opens up a family bussiness called 'Familia Jackson Beach Shack',Rachel attends college but appears pretty often,Emil is the same as ever but in regular contact with Demeter and Persephone and Lex accidentally cracked Percy's egg as a transfem bigender he/she/they/neos femme and helps her transition.Eoe has it's plot with Percy killing Zeus in a fit of rage and kickstarting a greco-roman mythos world revolution,Petallic focuses on Lex's earthy bringings and self and heritage on both ends,Arcane Rot is central on the Underworld Siblings and exploring them even further,Hazel-Blood is a side bonus book that's a Hazel character study and full on kids horror with an ancient roman coating and Unmythologizable is the grand Percyverse finale and we're told in the future Percy and Lex have a daughter they name after Sally who goes by Sal.The Outcast Godlings' titles are 'Hero and Destroyer of Olympus','Prophecy Breaker','The Ghost King' and 'Princess of The Underworld and The Unknown'

Lex in the official Pjo art!!

Lex in the Pjo picrew!

An outfit Lex has canonically worn /srs

And Lexcore images!!

[squad-of-idiots]

Interviewer: what is something you like about your partner?

Kirishima: that he never gives up on me! always supporting and encouraging me especially when my self eestem is low with whatever it is i'm faced with. he really is manly and i'm lucky to have him!

Interviewer: and what is something y-

Bakugou: his smile.

[deathxwalkerxx]

We Are Equals.

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x F/Reader

Warnings: Ah I think none? Maybe a little self eestem issues? Idk if that’s it. 

Anonymous asked:

I have a request if you're taking them, I may also request this to a few other blogs, so don't mind that, I absolutely love your work btw!!

I was hoping for Wanda and reader

wanda recently invited her gf R to live with her, but R has a habit she doesn't know about. The previous person R lived with always made R do the laundry, make all the food, do all the cleaning, and do everything, and R doesn't realize how messed up that is, R thinks their ''lower'' than whoever they live with, therefore they should do everything.

wanda is heartbroken to see R waiting on her like that, making her meals and cleaning up after her, and doing it happily too, and is upset that her love thinks so low of themselves.

que Wanda reassuring R they will split the work evenly, and R doesn't need to do everything

thank u in advance!

A/N: thank you so much for sending this in Panda!! I hope I’ve done this justice for you and it’s what you’ve envisioned the fic to be!! It’s my first time writing Wanda solo, so I hope again I’ve written this right!! Is it hot in here?? Cause I’m nervous lol.

They say you know what love is, the moment that you see the person you’re supposed to be with. Your heart would start thumping hard in your chest, your palms would become sweaty. All you could think about was when you’d see the person again, needing to see them again. Your routine would change just so you could fit them into your life. Your life wouldn’t no longer revolve around you, but your mind would revolve around your partner. That you would do anything to make them happy, and they would do the same for you. You’d never be able to look at life the same, and you’d feel like you finally woke up when you have met this person. 

Of course that wasn’t for you. Your first real relationship wasn’t like what they talked about. Of course for you, she was your everything and you’d do anything to make her happy. You didn’t think you deserved her, you found yourself thinking that you were beneath her, and that at any moment she would be whisked away by someone better, someone worth more than what you were. Of course that was a long time ago. You were now dating Wanda Maximoff, and she was everything that you thought no one should touch. Perhaps you put your partners on a high pedestal and never allowed yourself to be up there with them.

Wanda and yourself had been dating for a few months now, and everything was going swimmingly. Both of you learning about each other, and unable to stop touching each other. She knew just how to love you, and soon you were enthralled by her, needing her just as much as she needed you. One day out of the blue while the both of you were lounging around, watching a sitcom that Wanda loved she had asked you to move in with her. Granted it already felt like you both had been living together. At your place Wanda had a few of her things there and the same with you at hers. You liked Wanda’s place, it was more open than yours. The bedroom was a lot bigger and the bed was much more comfier also. 

Wanda didn’t mind which place you both picked to live in, though it warmed her heart that you picked hers, that you felt at home at her place. You found out that Wanda loved cooking, but while you were now living together you were doing the cooking. Wanda had to leave for work, and you began to clean up the place. It was clean, but you began to dust the place, and do the laundry. It was only the first week of living together so Wanda didn’t think anything of it. She was astonished when she came home and everything was sparkling, even the window sills were. She came home to a lovely cooked meal, and she wanted to savor it. She thanked you profusely, and even showed you that night how thankful she really was. 

Weeks went by and then months and it began to dawn on Wanda. She started to realize that something was wrong with this picture and she couldn’t believe that she let this go on for so long. You were doing the laundry every night, cooking, doing the dishes, making the bed, vacuuming, cleaning anything in this house. Wanda realized that she hadn’t once lifted a finger. You even made breakfast and then cleaned up while she was in the shower. You even cleaned the toilet. Wanda was mad at herself for allowing this to go on for as long as it had.

You were always like this? Thinking so little of yourself that you think you were some kind of servant to her? That you didn’t feel like you were an equal in this relationship at all? She couldn’t fathom how you would come to be this way, who made you like this? Why didn’t anyone stop you from being this way? It made her mad, that one day she knocked Natasha on her ass, before storming out of the training room. To say the assassin was surprised was an understatement. But Wanda didn’t have time to deal with that, she had something else on her mind. She had texted you that day, telling you not to cook, that she was picking up dinner on the way back. She needed to sit down with you and talk to you about this, she needed to set this right. 

She couldn’t be in a relationship with someone who thought they were beneath her, she couldn’t let you live like that, she couldn’t live like this. To Wanda you both were equal partners. You were not her maid, she was not royalty. No one deserved to be waited on hand and foot by someone that should be standing by their side. She never thought of you as below her, and she never would. It was driving her mad with how much this hurt her. Guilt was eating at her as she drove back to your home now, knowing that you’d be cleaning. She hated walking into this home and seeing how it was sparkling. She hated to see the look on your face like you’re proud of yourself for what you’ve accomplished. It just made her angry that you expect this to be a good thing. How could you not see how wrong this was? It made her feel dirty, though she wasn’t mad at you, she could never be mad at you for the way you had conditioned yourself to believe that this was what a relationship was supposed to be like.

Her eyes were burning with unshed tears as she brought the food into the kitchen, you leaning against the counter top with a mug between your hands as you peered into one of the bags. “Chinese for dinner?” You asked her a soft smile gracing your features as you hummed in approval before moving to grab some plates out of the cupboards. “Stop.” Wanda says, and you freeze at the tone she used. As you looked closer at her you could see the tension in her muscles and you swore that she was visibly shaking. You tried to rack your mind to find what made her this way. Had you folded the clothing wrong? Did you use the wrong washing powder? Did it make her itchy?

“I’m sorry. For whatever I have done.” You breathe out to Wanda now, and you could see her jaw clenching while looking at you, her eyes had tears in them and it had you canting your head, trying to figure her out. You had never seen her like this, you never wanted to see her like this. You wanted her happy, you wanted to do everything in your power to make her smile. “I’m not mad at you.” Wanda assures you, though it does nothing to make you relax. Something had her unhappy, and you were still trying to find out what exactly had made her this way. “Okay.” You say the word slowly, letting her know that you don’t trust her words. Palms began to sweat, but not in the way people told you about.

“I’m mad at myself.” She says now, her eyes glancing down at the kitchen counter that she was still standing beside, and your eyes stay glued on her, while you were standing in the middle of the kitchen, the counter keeping you both separated. “Why?” You had to ask, because you weren’t sure what was going on, and you wanted so badly to understand where Wanda was coming from, you wanted to be able to comfort her. “You don’t even see it.” Wanda says her voice cracking as she lowered herself into one of the stools, her legs feeling wobbly from the realization that you just didn’t get it. That you didn’t see how bad this was, how wrong it was.

“See what?” You ask softly, your own voice cracking as you made your way over to where Wanda was sitting, and you sat down next to her taking a hand in your own, your thumb brushing over her knuckles, trying your best to help soothe her, to be there for her. “How wrong this is, sweetie. You do all the laundry, the cooking, the cleaning. You’re not my servant. A relationship should be equal.” She says to you now, and you were frowning while looking at her, before pressing a kiss to her hair. “You do so much already, Wands. I just.. I wanted you to come home and just be able to put your feet up.” You whisper to her now, watching as she was shaking her head, her hand squeezing yours a little tightly though you don’t say anything about that.

“No. You do just as much as I do, Y/N. You work just as much as I do. A relationship should be equal, we should be splitting up the chores, not one of us doing them all. You’re not beneath me, baby. You should be beside me.” She says to you now. Your heart was breaking listening to her. All the things you were doing, you thought were the right thing. It wasn’t like you felt like you were her servant, you enjoyed cleaning up the place knowing that Wanda would just be able to come home and put something on tv to watch while you both enjoyed dinner. You opened your mouth to say something but nothing came out. Instead you silently move away from her, deciding for the time being to place the food on some plates. You could feel Wanda’s eyes on you, but you were focused on getting the food on the plates.

Once again you tried to open your mouth to say something to her, but nothing came out. You shake your own head while shaky hands place the food on the plates. “Detka?” You hear softly from Wanda now, and you shake your head a little harder now, your eyes not looking toward her. It broke Wanda, and she moved to wrap you in a hug, where you bury your face into her neck. “I didn’t want to lose you.” You finally say after some time, just breathing her in and letting her warmth calm your nerves. “I didn’t know that what I was doing was upsetting you, and that’s the last thing that I wanted to do. I love you, and I just. You’re very special to me, and deserve everything that I can offer you.” You say to her while Wanda was shaking her head. “Not like this, sweetie. This isn’t how a relationship works. We’re going to split the chores equally, okay? Because that’s what a relationship should be like. You’re my equal, you should always be equal in a relationship, not anything underneath.” She whispers before pulling back to place a soft kiss to your lips.

“We can start that while over dinner. Maybe we can also have every Friday be a takeout day.” She suggests, knowing that neither of you have to cook every night. And Friday seemed like a good night to have takeout. “I’d like that.” You whisper to her now, before pressing a kiss to her lips, and then to her forehead, lingering there before you were grabbing the plates only for Wanda to slap one of your hands, making you yelp and look at her in shock. “I can carry my own plate, detka.” She tells you now, though her words weren’t harsh, and you both move into the living room, sitting on the couch you wrap you both up in a blanket, legs curling underneath you as you grab your plate and turn the tv on. 

Wanda wanted you to pick something to watch, something that wasn’t what she wanted to watch, so you picked a comedy to watch while you both enjoyed the food. You got better over the coming weeks by sharing the chores, and you found yourself a little more relaxed around Wanda doing this. You came to realize that there was nothing wrong with being equal in a relationship, in fact. It just felt a lot better. You both took turns with cooking, one of you would do the breakfast, both of you would do lunch, and then one of you would do dinner. It always changed, neither one of you was just doing the dinner. Friday takeout became a thing, dishes were left until the morning. 

Both of you grew closer after doing this, the house felt more like a home, the relationship was stronger, and you showed how much you loved Wanda in other ways. When Wanda told you that she had knocked Natasha on her ass, you tried making her feel how she did feel on that day, just so you could see it again. But you haven’t succeeded as of yet. Maybe one day.

[0xochitlsketches0]

Here they are in a picrew!!

Their name is Alexandria Xiá de los Santos and they go by Lex!!They're blasian(chinese dominican on their mortal parent's side and black on their godly one's)and a child of Demeter!!Their weapon is a sword called 'Rhodon' that was gifted to them by their mom and can turn into a hairclip with a heart on it for sakekeeping!

Personality wise,Lex is very shy,kind and softspoken but has a sense of humor that's a lot like Percy's and self-eestem issues caused by growing up being bullied and being an outcast with no friends as a consequence of being a demigod.Their interests are video games,dogs,boba and stereotypical 'girl' things(they are transmasc genderfluid!)and their story is about learning to love themself and becoming a hero!

Speaking of which,in their verse,the Second Great Prophecy called for 8 demigods instead of just 7 and they're one of them!!They became best friends with Percy in TLT(arriving at camp a month before him)and they're head over heels for eachother!!Other important relathionships they have are their strong siblinghood with the other Demeter kids,being best friends with Thalia,an older sibling figure to Nico and Hazel and a platonic connection with Reyna over their similarities(dw though,Lex does get the guy and Reyna gets a gf eventually!).

Final note:A big point in their story is that unlike in canon,Annabeth's constant mistreatment of Percy is adressed and called out!Lex themself is the catalyst by realizing it inbetween tlo and tlh and manages to make Percy do the same at the climax of moa which causes a Perc///abeth breakup and leads to an Annabeth redemption!!

I hope you like them♡

I love, love, LOVE the name Rhodon for the sword, does it have a rose design on it? 👀👀👀 👉👈

Also, it being a hair clip is a PEAK character design, I'm going mad just thinking about it

Since they're a child of Demeter do they have a fondness for any plant in particular?

Either way, I like the character, and I'm happy they have a strong connection with their siblings, that is something I wish the original books touched on more, and their relationship with the other characters seems sweet. I'm all for Thalia, Reyna, Nico, and Hazel getting more friends.

We also love an Annebeth redemption arc haha 🔥🔥🔥

[unknown-internet]

The Miss Understanding

No matter where I go

no matter how much I work on myself

I will be misunderstood

I can only right my wrongs and go from there

but the growing pain still happens there

within me and I just have a hard navigating through it

from 'you are a bad person' to

'I am not because I am human'.

I'm sorry to my mom

the woman who gave me birth

and did everything to protect me

just so at one point be afraid of me

and I cannot runaway from the past

because I never intended to be

the person I tried hard to never be

or repeat.

From rags to riches

from fame to stillness

I wonder who I am

in the mix of it all.

I know I'm not the horrible person

my brain claims to be

but I can't help to wonder

that if I was all good

the thought shouldn't rise to the top

when the plate is full

why do I make it fit more.

Why is being a human so hard

when I have 70,000 thoughts a day

and most of them damage my self-eestem

when I thought I was the only person I can count on.

The battles my ancestors fought for my position today

my will continues to be tested

and even if I'm gone

I will cause a lot more damage than I intend do

the damn if I do or don't

I will still be misunderstood

when I simply want to be heard

but I find myself in the fog

of the unknown and the to be or not to be.

When the whole world is counting on you

because you love your passion

and you want to make a difference

you can't let the negative thoughts weigh more

than the sacrifices that were made for you.

I don't care to be misunderstood by the world

but I can't let myself be misunderstood to me

I am here for a purpose and have worth more

than any external validation I recieved.

The only safe net I find is the one I have within

and I need to always find that again and again

to never forget where I come from

finding people that help you see life in a different prespective

that the small talk I have with people

makes me feel closer and connected

it makes me realize that even if these people don't know me

that I am still appreciated

that I am not the words my brain tells me in passing.

I don't ever want to make any of my friends

or family to be worried about me

I know life is a whirlwind

I know my mother has a lot of other things to worry about

and I shouldn't be another thing

I always have to give myself courage during these times

to find a way to keep pursuing

to keep the dream alive

to talk to God:

please take these ugly thoughts with you

and help me find strengthen

I only want to be good

but why do I feel so bad

Dios todopoderoso

en este momento me acerco a ti

con humildad y reverencia....

I don't care if I don't make it to

the pearly white fences to your house

I know I'm not perfect

nor am I asking for validation from you

I'm just asking guidance.

[yandere-daydreams]

so what you're saying is that we should all not reblog, like or follow you whille still reading? understood.

Babe, just say you don’t think of writers as people and be done with it. I’m not up for the games today.

[the-queen-of-zones]

// also I might just reply by text sometimes, I hate my art style in general, but I won’t delete so don’t worry

[ladylucindae]

[Parallel]

Hello! I want to thank all of you for your support!

It’s a unofficial second part of my post about Hinata’s view on Chiaki and Komaeda. This time I want to show you how similar Hinata and Komaeda are and how it’s showing in Komahina & Hinanami. I used word parallel not without a reason. That’s why this time we will analyze in detail how Hinata cared about Chiaki and Komaeda about Hinata. Enjoy!

FIRST PART:

http://ladylucindae.tumblr.com/post/156740327682/comparison

RENDER: Nemi20

ARTIST: ???

HINATA’S PAST SIDE:

Hinata met Chiaki by accident. She got attached to him quickly because with him she was able to do something she always dreamed of - spending a time with a friend and have fun. Hinata couldn’t believed that his presence was the only thing she really needed. It was strange and rather... normal. He was lonely as her but it was a problem someone as miserable like him, not an Ultimate.

Hinata couldn’t accept himself the way he was at that time. He admired Chiaki becuase she was a part of Main Course. He tensed up in her presence and he couldn’t help being proud that she choose him as companion even if it was weird for him. Chiaki tried her best to help him and make him understand how being talentless isn’t wrong. In her eyes he was free. He could be anyone he wanted to be. He wasn’t bounded to games like she was.

Time they spend together were precious to both of them. Hinata at that point was even more frustrated to be a part of Main Course. Chiaki was there and he wasn’t good enough to spend time with her. Everyone looked down on him, even his classmate Natsumi Fuyuhiko who should understand his feelings.

Hinata was inspired by her and that small light encouraged him to ask about what happened to her. It was the only one moment where Hinata was on the way to accept himself. “I’ll do it! I’ll find her and do something to help!”. He wanted to consider himself as Chiaki’s friend. He wanted to be her friend. Sakakura smashed his braveness without any shame. A wall beetwen Chiaki and him was too sturdy to destroy with his own determination.

Hope’s Peak Academy made him believe that this goal could be accomplished only by taking part in Kamakura Project. There is a high possibility that Hinata being always neglected or even abused by his parents never had an opportunity to develop a healthly friendship with anyone. He admired Hope’s Peak Academy becuase he tried to find a way to make impossible possible. It was a Hope’s Peak Academy after all, who would help him better than them?

His past self was cursed by admiration.

KOMAEDA’S NEO WORLD PROGRAM SIDE:

Komaeda needed someone who could accept him with all his flaws. It wouldn't be possible without Neo World Program for him to realize that he is able to find his happiness. He was self-loathing but he couldn't accept getting close to someone without talent.That's crucial part. Komaeda believed Hinata was Ultimate even better than himself - that's why was interested in Hinata and his bystander aura.

The difference between Hinata & Chiaki and Komaeda & Hinata was that Hinata in Komaeda's company didn't feel inferior even if Komaeda was feeling this towards him just not as strong as usual with others Ultimates. Komaeda's situation is the same as Hinata's in Chiaki's case.

Their relationship changed drastically after Komaeda's reveal. Yet, Komaeda couldn't understand why Hinata was different from all the Ultimates. He was still talking to him even if he was undoubtedly mad, he was checking on him and didn't say harsh words like Souda and he was clearly worried about him when he was in the Hospital. Again, a parallel with Chiaki's and Hinata's relationship. Chiaki was always concerned about their meetings, she was always trying to support Hinata and she was mad at him when he ditched her. This anger quickly changed into sadness and worry.

Just like Hinata, Komaeda was attached to Hinata as he was to Chiaki. The difference was in their self-awareness. Komaeda was conscious of nature of feelings towards Hinata while Hinata was admiring Chiaki because he felt he doesn't deserve her the way he was at that moment - talentless. Komaeda struggled because of those feelings and couldn't tell them directly but they were definitely there. It sounds familiar, right?

"I love hope. You admire hope. In some ways we're similar, but maybe that difference is what's making me so emotional."

And that's the whole point! Komaeda is saying those words to Hinata after realizing Hinata is Reserve Course Student. He is confused but he can't help still loving Hinata for all kindness and support he gave him. He deep down accepted Hinata the way he was, his true appearance not the one he was imagining. That's why he took his hand after waking up from Neo World Program. He accepted Hinata as he accepted his flaws.

“Ahh... Kamakura Izuru? No, you’re, uh, Hinata, right?”

He was in the middle of waking up and he bearly recognized anything but he heard Hinata’s voice and it probably reminded him about his dream in Neo World Program with Hajizuru. Yet, he almost already corrected himself and asked if person in front of him is the person he wanted to meet the most.

SUMMARY:

Admiration couldn't make a healthy relationship. Hinata was too focused on being equal rather on his own true feelings for Chiaki or her feelings for him. He almost made it. He almost was on his way to realize that in relationships talents don't matter but... he failed. His faith was crushed.

The saddest part of this comparison is Komaeda was able to understand his feelings and accept things way they were, while Hinata never did that in the first place. He never accepted himself or see real Chiaki - normal girl, who wanted to make a lot of friends and play video games.

Komaeda's and Hinata relationship could end up the same as theirs but Komaeda got the chance to grow up on his own peace.

I also believe that Hinata and Chiaki could develop healthly friendship or romantic relationship but only if Chiaki would survive The Most Tragic Event In History Of Mankid. Hinata was too immature in Despair Side.

TL;DR: Komaeda was in the same situation as Hinata but instead of neglecting real Hinata he choose to accept him.

[zayizzle]

Golden Deer Outfits: #4

Marianne

[sapphyhoney]

You deserve to take as much space as your heart pleases!!

[punkeropercyjackson]

Hobie around Gwen and Miles is literally 😏 personified

He knows exactly the effect he has on them and he loves flustering them on purpose but with best friends teasing and helping them with their self-eestem with no filter compliments and i love that for all of them.Hopefully by Beyond 'them' will include Margo because it's not complete without her and you can't tell me her and Hobie aren't a thing-They're eachother's type(black dorks)

[xchromiumx]

Anyone else ever think "one day im gunna be an artist" but then realize technically you aready are you just arent at the level you want to be but you dont like referring to yourself as an Artist™ cause only ppl that you aspire to be like are Artists™ but you know that's the wrong way to think about things and it's damaging to your motivation to create more?

[saebaragi]

my mom: lERN TO LOVE HOW YOU LOOK!

little sister: nO!

me:

me: heart shaped waffles :DD!! *excitedly shows pic*

[toonpai]

Ive gotten to the point where I'm keeping record of how fast an attractive person matches with me in dating apps and then either unmatched with me or stops talking to me