#some of these are more vibes than anything but its just my truth

[mike-haters-dni]

The Michaeleven Playlist ♫

[gilverrwrites]

Hi friend!

Would you be interested in doing a NSFW alphabet for Bruce? Just read your black mask one and damn heheh

Bruce Wayne: NSFW Alphabet

AN: Thank your so much, glad you enjoyed! And yes I would be interested.

As always readers; please take whatever you vibe with and leave what you don’t. It’s all in good fun.

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

It really depends on your existing relationship, and its level of intimacy.

A hook-up is getting the bare minimum to keep his image where he wants it to be. He’ll help you get clean, offer you his bathroom, and if he can, he’ll help you redress and get you out asap. If you decide to stay, he’ll be cordial; he’ll do the pillow talk, let you wear his shirt, make sure you’re fed and watered or whatever but he won’t hold you, and he won’t be there when you wake up. He will however leave a note with some half-truth about having to leave for business, and money/gift cards for a coffee and an Uber.

If you’re more than that (dating/married/so on) then it depends on how well you’ve voiced your needs to him, and how much time he has. Let’s be real Bruce is a hypocrite, he wants you to tell him in explicit detail how you need to be cared for, and if you don’t he’s profiling you until he gets it right, but he ain’t saying anything about himself.

So provided he doesn’t have to run off to save the day, or your escapades haven’t coincided with a routine patrol, Bruce is excellent at aftercare.

B = Body part (their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Him: Bruce is highly critical of himself. He’s not blind, he knows he’s physically fit, widely intelligent, and highly attractive, but there’s also always room for improvement.

But if he had to choose, it would be his brain. He enjoys being able to look at you and knowing in an instant that you want him. Knowing if it’s a right here right now, or a tease me till I’m begging kind of want. Knowing exactly what you need to hear or where you need to be touched. Being able to predict and acclimatise to your desires is such a big thing for him.

As for you: It’s all in your eyes. You may or may not think you’re quite stony-faced, but not to Bruce. He just loves how expressive your eyes are. Yes, when he’s analysing you; looking for those dilated pupils and heavy lids. But also just the delight when he surprises you with sneaky kisses, when the skin around them grows crinkly as he growls something totally scandalous, or how they grow wide and doe-like as he’s stretching you out, or when they twitch and roll when he’s fucking you just right.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He’s not particularly vocal about it unless he’s really lost in the heat of the moment but; breeding kink. He wants his cum buried as deep inside of you as your body will allow. He wants you so full it’s spilling out and leaking down your thighs, soaking into the bedsheets. And then he’s gonna scoop all those stray drops up and push it all right back in.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

At his age, he doesn’t really get the terms that people use in sex nowadays. That information wasn’t easily obtained in his prime but if he had to identify with something he’d claim soft/dom and/or a brat-tamer, and he’d be right.

But sometimes he likes to switch roles.

He’d never admit it, because he’s a goddamn control freak, he considers (his own) submission as weak and at best he’d be a power bottom but damn it’s so comforting and so hot to be at your mercy or just taken care of sometimes.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Ooh ho ho. Brucie has been around many blocks, and back again.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

I have no explanation for this, I just feel it in my bones but he’s so into doggy. Especially when it’s a hook-up and/or a quickie. By extension, the flatiron because it offers that really deep penetration that has him cumming right against your cervix.

Also the eagle and the leg lock/missionary, specifically with a pillow under your hips and one of his hands pushing on your stomach so that he can keep you in place as he punishes your g spot.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Very rarely goofy, at least not until he’s at a level of familiarity and intimacy that would allow him to let those walls down. He’s not without a sense of humour, it helps if you’re goofy first.

Blow a raspberry on him, and he’s pinning you down and giving you 10 back. Give him a ridiculous nickname and he’ll start testing new ones out on you. “Ohh Brucie boo boo, that feels so good.” “You like it when I bend you over and fuck you like this honey bunny?”

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

It’s thick and dark, but well-trimmed. In his younger years, he waxes off his happy trail and chest hair, but from his mid-late 30s, he starts letting it grow.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

This again is widely dependent on your relationship.

If you’re a hook-up it’s just about fun really. It’s sensual, borderline pornographic but ultimately impersonal.

But if you’re more than that, then sex is very intimate for him, and he’s surprisingly passionate.

He struggles with voicing his emotions so this is how he shows you his appreciation for all that you do. It’s how he apologises for being gone so much, for making you worry. Your body is where he takes out his frustrations but also where finds respite and comfort.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Not something he particularly enjoys, but it is a necessity. He’d rather the real thing, but if that’s not accessible when he needs to let off some steam then so be it.

There have been many, long frustrating nights that have ended with him beating it in front of the batcomputer, unable to focus, and wishing it were you.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

As previously mentioned, breeding kink. (See c for cum)

Bondage: I’m specifically talking about him being the rope bunny here. Nothing extreme, soft ropes holding his wrists to a chair or a bed frame while you grind on him. Yes he could break out at any minute, but he doesn’t, that’s part of the submission, the fun.

This can be flipped, he’ll tie you up if that’s what you want but he prefers to pin you down with nothing but his own strength and body weight.

Roleplay/primal play: His interest in the whole cat and mouse (or bat and cat) has never been subtle really. He likes being the predator, catching the prey and taking his reward. Ties in closely with the brat taming too if you’re a fighter or mouther.

Extending on prev, I think he’d also like interrogation play: again both ways but primarily he likes to be the interrogator. To hold you down, tease, and question about whatever subject matter, probably what you want to have done with you, until you beg him to make good on all your confessions.

L = Location (favourite places to do the do)

He’s boring in this regard; the bed. It’s a comfortable, safe environment where he can let loose.

If you wanted to do it in the cave or the Batmobile he’d comply, but explicitly when off duty with low risk.

But if it was up to him, he’d keep you all locked up in his chambers, squirming in his sheets, eyes rolling back to look at his ceiling. It’s like he’s claiming you, inside and out, full and scented by him and his bedsheets.

Maybe, with the certainty that nobody will be home, he’ll find other places to fuck you; the marble stairs, the hot tub, in front of the fireplace.

But be prepared for the unmitigated guilt and humiliation of traumatising at least one of his kids when they inevitably stop by unannounced.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

He often comes home in the early hours of the morning still full of adrenaline and looking for relief.

Outside of that, he’s highly receptive to teasing and shameless levels of flirting. Clothing too; he likes skimpy, short skirts low cut tops but that’s not always necessary. Just knowing you’ve got nothing on under that flowy outfit, or that he bought you those shoes, or that’s his button-up will do it for him.

And then there’s domesticity. When you bring him food during a long and intense research session. Seeing you be really good with Damian, or helping Cass with her ballet hair, or scheduling dinner for the two of you with Babs and Dick.

Just you clicking so perfectly into his life, predicting and meeting his needs without being asked, makes him want to show you just how much he appreciates it.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

If you want to call him daddy that’s fine, he can be your baby daddy, but you are not his baby.

You can be his baby momma though. He wants to fuck a child into you, not fuck a child, even in a fantasy capacity.

If he wanted a child he’d be adopting you, not sleeping with you.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

50/50

He rarely gives oral when hooking up, because he’s a fucking beast at it. Wet and sloppy, just going to town, which affords him a lot of women wanting to ride again. But in that same vein, he doesn’t expect these people to give him anything. If they’re gasping for it, he’ll oblige but otherwise, he just avoids the whole oral thing.

But when it’s his love, there’s no stopping him from spending an afternoon worshipping those perfect hot, wet folds. Drinking you up until your fluids are dripping down his neck, until his scalp aches from your grip and you’re seeing stars.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

It varies of course but preferentially 70/30 rough/sensual with a lot of crossover.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

As mentioned in J for Jack-off, if he needs to release some tension quickly, and you’re available then he’ll take you. Bend you over the nearest surface, bruising you with his vice grip, no sound but for his grunting and the salacious slap of your skin against his until he’s got everything out of his system and can get back to the job at hand.

But otherwise, he’d rather take his time with you.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

If you’re an adrenaline junkie, then sure he’ll take risks for you.

That said, the risks he takes are calculated, and he is good at maths. He won’t bore you with the statistics, just know that he’ll always find a way to give you what you want.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

No average human can keep up with Bruce Wayne’s stamina, let’s be real. But that’s okay, when you’re all spend and cock drunk and too weak to move, he’ll make sure you don’t miss out on anything. He’s strong and fit enough to do all the work for the both of you.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Holy utility belts Batman!

For all his gadgets and tech, I want to say he has sex toys galore but honestly I really don’t think he does.

He probably has the classics: retrains, cock ring, remote control vibe, plug, dildo and/or strap.

And some more out there things: electro collars/low impact tasers, clamps, a swing.

Heaven knows he can afford anything and everything. But beyond that, I don’t think he reaches for them often, nor does he seek out or experiment with new ones. Not unless something sparks it.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Are you kidding? The moment he sees his opportunity he’s laying the teasing on thick. Sneaking touches when nobody is looking, speaking to you in that voice, calling you while you’re busy to tell in explicit detail what he’s been thinking about doing to you since he saw you in those pants this morning.

And when he finally gets you alone, he’s 100x worse.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make)

Noisy but not loud. He has such a low, deep voice. So when he groans and coos in your ear it’s certainly clamorous to you. All the filthy things he says bellows.

But nobody outside the room you’re in will hear him, not unless he wants to be heard anyway.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

With time and experimentation, Bruce knows what turns you on better than you do. Kinks you’ve never thought of. Subtle touches you barely notice, getting just close enough for you to smell his natural musk. He moves his body in precise ways, and uses really specific words that have your mind racing.

He’ll play you like a fiddle and have you thinking it was your idea.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

He’s packing, and we all know I don’t mean guns.

And that's when it’s soft and in the cold. At full glory, I’d say at least 8 inches, above average girth. Cut, with some very prominent veins.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Fair to moderate, adrenaline heightens the senses and emotions and can be an aphrodisiac which is where a lot of his drive comes from.

But removing that from the equation, he’s trained himself not to think about you or anything that turns him on when he needs to focus. So when he gets to relax or when he sees you again, all that pent-up denial comes running back to him.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

It really depends on his mindset. More often than not, by the time post-climax hits, after an already long night, he’s out like a light the moment you’ve signalled that you don’t need him any more. Sometimes sooner.

But if something’s on his mind, a series of clues that aren’t adding up, a villain that shouldn’t have gotten away, when he’ll be up all night thinking about it. In this scenario, it’s not uncommon to find his side of the bed empty within an hour or two.

[everythingne]

you have me and I have you -- DR3

Taking the twins to meet Daniel at a race nearly ends in disaster for the youngest, luckily you remember a little saying that goes a long way for when her emotions get too big for her all weekend away from her favorite person on the planet.

daniel ricciardo x wife!mother!reader

warnings/notes: probably inaccurate f1 information (specifically with where they live but idc its my fic), i'm not going off any actual timeline of real events dude this is just vibes, maxiel content bursting out of this fic, might make this little family a series i dunno, i don't have the most knowledge of daniel's career so mind some gaps

--

You and Daniel lived an exceptionally private life--surprisingly. Alpha Tauri's home base was in Faenza, Italy. And when Daniel was announced to be driving for them, you both tossed around a few different city names until Max of all people found you both a quaint little house just outside of the main touristy parts of Ravenna.

Somehow the world champion knew the both of you would find it was a perfect spot to nestle in for the time being. You knew that once the girls really got into school, like proper schooling, you'd have to settle them near Daniel's family. That's what you'd agreed to do when you planned to return to teaching full-time, but for now, Ravenna worked beautifully.

And it was beautiful too.

You had moved and traveled a lot with Daniel due to his career, it had never bothered you in the near decade the both of you had been together. The two of you never fought, sure you argued, but nothing hateful. It was usually a 'stop overthinking this' or 'stop overworking yourself on that' and with two perfectionists who adored their careers and families it could get a bit tense. But, you loved Daniel more than anything, and he loved you just the same. So it always worked out in the end.

Three years dating, one year engaged, seven years married, five years parents. Parents. Two beautiful twin daughters, you hadn't not been trying for kids, and though the girls were a surprise, they were happily welcomed by the Ricciardo's and your family when announced. And of course their loads of F1 uncles, like Max, Yuki, Lando, and of course Pop Pop and Grannie Horner, who had just about died when the youngest of the two twins--Rosella, called them that without you or Daniel prompting her to.

"She speaks the truth!" Daniel had laughed when Geri scooped the little girl up in her arms and squeezed her, kissing her forehead. Max had just laughed for like ten minutes at Christian's face before the man finally made some remark that he was "finally old enough for that title."

And then a few months later little Penelope would do the same, with a quite similar reaction.

Life in Ravenna was perfect, and you had been blessed with a remote job that allowed you to work anywhere making your life a breeze of constant travel, love, and spending nights alongside your husband or his family and friends in lavish hotels for grand prix.

Speaking of Grand Prix, it was time to get the girls moving. The two of them, Rosella Grace Ricciardo and Sienna Michelle Ricciardo, are currently settled with their suitcases beside them in the living room as you finish unplugging the necessary items and locking up the house. Rosella was playing with her stuffed bear, idly singing some song her grandparents had been trying to teach her, and Sienna was currently trying to repack her bag that you had so meticulously put together.

"Si, stop messing with your bag, sweetheart." You try to not let any annoyance sink into your tone but fail a little as you make your way to the foyer.

"Sorry, Momma." Sienna pouts and hides in on herself, her big brown eyes and bouncy curls making you think of her father--who was currently in a car going god knows how fast on the track. Max had been the one to invite you to Miami, saying it would be good to get the girls there to surprise Daniel.

What he hadn't thought of was how hard it is to get two twins through the airport, who look exactly like Daniel Ricciardo, without raising any eyebrows because this was their first appearance at the track since they were toddlers and didn't look like much of anyone except for having Daniel's undoubtedly huge smiles.

"Hey," you say, but don't explain the sentence that brings both of your daughters immediate calm, "You have me and I have you."

The sentence, something from the night before you married the girl's father basically equated to 'we've got this, don't freak out, I'm not mad and you're gonna be fine.' and whatever else it needed to at the moment and it had been a constant in the past seven or so years of your life.

And Sienna calms herself immediately, nodding at you.

You peck a kiss to Sienna's hairline as you repack her bag, "All better, nothing to be sad about, okay?"

She nods, taking her bag and helping her sister grab her stuff as you get them out to the car. The two are pretty well-behaved by now and have learned when to do as you ask and when it's okay to play around a little. You thank Daniel for that, he'd always set a good example. Once everything is in the trunk, you secure the girls in their seats and then thank one of the women you'd become close with down the road for driving you to the airport.

Natalie grins, patting your shoulder as you settle in with a big huff, "I just wish you luck getting them through the airport by yourself! Usually, you have Michelle with you."

"Well, Michelle's unable to come to Miami because she's working, so it's just me this time!" You try to hide your annoyance at the whole situation already, but Natalie just laughs as she starts to drive through the streets of your beloved town.

"Don't stress it, those girls are too well-mannered to cause a fuss."

"I hope so." You sigh, glancing over your shoulder at the both of them.

--

The airport in Italy is a breeze, it's the Miami airport that gives you trouble with the girls because one file isn't filled out correctly. One fucking file. You end up leaving poor Geri Halliwell in the pick-up lane for like an hour while you scramble to fix it so you're not shipped off back home with the girls, who are tired and miserable and just wanna go to bed.

And you'd run out of snacks on the plane, which was another level of catastrophe as Rosella complains every two seconds she's starving and going to die while Sienna complains her feet hurt and makes you carry her around.

Luckily, the airport staff seems to take a bit of pity on you and push you through as quick as possible. You stumble out to the pick-up line to find your ride, the warm Miami air making the girls want to play a bit. Setting down Sienna you make both girls keep one hand on your suitcase as you meet Geri halfway to the car and she kneels down to give the twins hugs as they scream her name.

"So much for discreet." You huff, watching Geri happily interact with the girls. And you learn right then that she's always planning ahead (maybe it's the whole having four kids thing) as she pulls out two little baggies of packed snacks for the girls from her coat.

Once the girls spot Christian, it's game over as they sprint with their little suitcases bouncing behind them and he barely has time to kneel before they're trying to hug him.

"Lookin' good Mama," Geri grins as she picks up Sienna's discarded backpack and you laugh off the compliment as she stands, placing her hands on her hips, "I'll take it they missed us?"

"They wouldn't shut up about getting to see you guys all week after Danny left," You let her pull you into a hug as she kissed your hairline. She helps you get the girl's stuff in the car while Christian entertains the two who sit in the back seat and you end up between your daughters on the drive to the hotel.

"We rented you a room on another floor just for tonight, we figured you'd wanna surprise Danny at the race." Geri turns to talk to you as Christian drives and you nod, leaning forward so she can sit straight. Sienna's babbling to Christian about class, Rosella trying to butt in to get his attention too, and you lean your head on Geri's seat.

"Thank you guys, I'm serious when I say I'll pay you back."

"It came out of Oracle Red Bull Racing's pocket, not mine." Geri holds her hands up and you let out a soft laugh, finally feeling the weariness of the nearly twelve-hour flight.

When you make it to the hotel, Christian goes first to ensure the coast is clear, and you find they've already checked into the room so you're able to go straight up. Once inside, you thank the Horners one more time with tight hugs and a promise to bring them around to Italy soon before shutting the door.

"Momma!" Rosella whines as soon as the door is locked and dead-bolted shut, "I'm tired!"

"Me too!" Sienna copies her twin and flops on the floor and you laugh.

"Let's get you two ready for bed, yeah?" You muse, grabbing the suitcases and flipping them open, and letting the girls pick out the pajamas while you do the same with some loungewear. It's only around five at night, and you do still need to feed the girls a proper dinner, so you assume a short nap with a break for chicken nuggets before bed will be perfect.

--

You rouse from sleep to two sets of little hands hitting you, the girls giggling as they whisper, "Momma, momma!"

"Mhmn," You groan, rubbing your face, "Yeah?"

"Daddy called you, Rosella answered it like a big girl!"

"Mhm!" Rosella cheers, leaning to not-so-secretly whisper, "I didn't even tell him the big secret!"

"That's great--" You go to say sleepily and then you blink your eyes open when you hear Danny laughing over the phone and you sit up to your elbows and snag the phone from her.

"Both of you, shoo." You wave a hand and the girls shriek as you curl your fingers like you're going to tickle them and then sit up in bed.

"I swear I set an alarm." You laugh, rubbing your eyes as you check the clock--in Italy, it would be noon right now which would be typical for your afternoon nap with the girls.

"No big deal. I just wanted to call you when I was getting up for race day." Daniel yawns and you can imagine him rubbing at his face as he lets out a muffled groan over the phone, "How are you and the girls?"

"They're having a blast but being little tornadoes," You huff, "but I'm managing."

"Ah, that's my girl. Superstar mom." You can physically hear Danny's smile in his voice and it makes you laugh, when you ask him how he's doing he regales practice and qualifiers as you get yourself out of bed and grab the girls a change of clothes. Mouthing for them to get in the shower as you mute the phone so Danny doesn't hear the water as you turn it on. Walking back to supervise from the doorway you pop in a few questions here and there.

By the time the call is wrapping up, Sienna's gotten soap in her eyes, so you bid Daniel a quick goodbye as you scold Rosella for splashing her sister in the face and end the call. You double-check to make sure it's actually ended before you move into the bathroom.

It takes an hour for you to get ready, which means by the time you're bringing the girls down to meet with Geri, her kids, and Kelly and Penelope, all the drivers are making their way to the track.

But, of course, you have to run into Charles in the elevator.

"Didn't know you were gonna make it this weekend," Charles says as you step in, the girls shy away from him a little, especially Sienna who practically buries herself behind her sister. You laugh softly.

"Guys, it's just Charles." You say over your shoulder and they both peek up again before gasping and jumping over to hug him. He kneels down to the girls, accepting both of their tight hugs as you speak,

"We weren't until Max told me he got us paddock passes,"

"They're still that close, huh?" Charles stands once the girls release him and you shrug,

"I think Max feels bad for how it ended with them in Red Bull, kinda like how Lando and Daniel are still super close after McLaren because of--God, don't get me started actually." You pinch your nose, the wound of McLaren's drop of Daniel had been the most difficult part of your partnership with Daniel thus far. You hoped it stayed that way.

"I'm glad they're still close." Charles smiles and then bids you goodbye as a Ferrari employee starts scolding him in French--or Italian, or maybe both, as she drags him off in the opposite direction.

You cart the twins off to the little restaurant within the hotel, thanking the hostess who brings you to Geri and Kelly's table and you greet them with a happy smile. Once the kids are all introduced and settled, you relax and roll out your neck.

"I am exhausted." You announce and Kelly pushes a mimosa towards you, grinning, and you happily take it. Breakfast goes relatively well, Penelope wants to sit in your lap halfway through because she missed you, and Bluebell updates you on her applications for university.

The Halliwell-Horner kids are a mess of different parents, but all act just as loving as your own twins, it makes you smile as you notice Bluebell pause mid-sentence to make sure her sister ordered her food correctly and her brother has enough to drink when the waitress comes around to check on you all.

And then Sienna gasps and points at the TV, squealing at an ear-piercing decibel, "Dad!"

"Shh!" You hush her, both Kelly and Geri laughing as you try and handle the two kids who are excitedly pointing out their father on the TV. It's interviews from yesterday on replay in preparation for the race later. And the twins won't stop even with you, Geri, Kelly, and the other kids at the table (save for Geri's youngest) trying to hush them.

"Girls. Knock it off or we're going outside!" You hiss through your teeth, pointing at the two next to you, and Rosella literally screams 'no' at you.

"Good grief." You sigh, then grab her by the waist and wave for her sister to follow you. While Sienna's a little hesitant, a gentle tap from Geri makes the girl scoot off her chair and follow you and a screeching Rosella out of the small restaurant. The three of you settle on the floor as you try to calm a clearly upset Rosella, who curls into your side.

"C'mere, Si." You hold an arm out as you sit on the floor and Sienna curls into your other side. You wipe the frustrated tears off Rosella's face, she had always been attached to Daniel by the hip, you weren't sure why you assumed this would be easier for her than her sister.

"I know you guys are excited to see your dad, I know, I am too." You say to the two twins who sit in your lap on the floor in probably the nicest hotel in Miami, "I miss him just as much as you guys do but... we have to be quiet in restaurants. We can't start screaming like we're at home, okay?"

"Momma, 'm sorry Momma." Rosella sniffles and you pepper soft kisses to her hairline and wipe the tears from her face as Sienna gives her twin a hug.

"It's okay, darling, you know you have me and I have you, yeah? You just have big emotions you wanna get out, but we have to remember inside voices and that there's always a time and place for everything, okay?" You rub her back as she hiccups, big tears rolling down her face as she starts calming down with big gasps.

The girl nods, scrubbing at her face and you give her a little kiss on the top of her forehead before giving Sienna a kiss there too.

"Are we calm enough to talk now, Ella?" You say softly and the girl nods, you scoop her up and bring Sienna back in so she can sit at the table and eat, informing Geri and Kelly you'll be right back after you take Rosella on a little calm down walk.

And you end up in a little courtyard, bouncing Ella on your hip as she speaks softly as you pause at a fountain.

"And Daddy's always there when I'm sad." She recounts as she hiccups, still crying a little as you rock her and rub her back, "and I got sad he wasn't there, and then he wasn't there to make me happy, and it made me more sad."

"Oh honey, it's okay." You look over your shoulder, swearing for the third time you're seeing Lando out of the corner of your eye--which is impossible because he's at the track and you're just being paranoid.

"Big emotions come out sometimes, it's happened to me. When your dad and I got married, I freaked out on him the night before because I was so stressed something would go wrong. I screamed at him, like a full freakout," You sigh, pressing your lips to your daughter's hair before whispering, "You know what he did?"

"What did he do?" Rosella sits back so she can look you in the eyes, you bounce her up and readjust your grip.

"He held me like I'm holding you now and he said 'I know you've got big emotions and so do I, but you know what we also both have?'" You remember the way he'd pressed his lips to your hairline, hands tucking you into his body as he cradled you in the bathroom of the wedding suite in the hotel,

"And I said 'no' because I was having big emotions, and he said 'You have me and I have you.' Just like right now, Ella, you have me and I have you."

"Oh! That's why you and Daddy say that." Ella smiles, kicking one of her feet a little and you nod. She wipes the last of the tears from her eyes and you kiss her cheek, before walking back to the restaurant when she claims she's finally calm enough to eat and be a little quieter.

--

About ten thousand things are happening in the Alpha Tauri garage when you sneak in with Yuki's help. You see Daniel off to the side, talking with some engineers with a stressed expression, and instead of walking over to wrap your arms around him like you want to-- you cart the twins off to his driver's room and settle them in there.

"Should I get him?" Yuki asks once he's finally gotten Sienna to pry off his leg and you laugh, shaking your head.

"Surprise, remember?" You speak softly, hushing the giglging twins.

"Yeah, but he's..." Yuki makes a face and you roll the idea around in your head. The girls had never seen Daniel frustrated, any sort of negative emotions you and Daniel tried to keep away from them.

"How bad?" You ask, mouthing one to ten, and Yuki mouths back a solid nine. So you groan, dragging your hands down your face and holding up a hand for him to wait while you kneel down and wave the girls over.

"Listen, Ella, Si." You poke their arms playfully as they quiet down their giggles when you slowly lower your hands to the floor, "Quiet time, okay? Momma's gonna go out and see where Daddy is, and I might bring him back here, okay?"

The girls nod and you kiss both of their foreheads before leaving the driver's room with Yuki and speaking softly, "I'll come with you."

He nods and waves you along, making his way through the back hall and back into the main area of the garage where Daniel was standing with his back to you. Mouthing good luck, Yuki slips off to stand beside Daniel as they talk racing stats. You just stand for a while, watching your husband as he clearly fusses over some fudging of numbers and how the team seems to be running whatever tactic on a sort of hail-mary moment. You know he hates leaving it up to fate.

"Okay, well," Daniel groans, clearly wanting to change strategy but knowing he's unable to do so, "I don't even know."

Yuki suggests something, but it gets shot down, and then you slowly start to inch forward. You see the videographers and photographers readying themselves for the moments, cameras lifting up high as they wait for the moment or whatever line will come out of your mouth.

"This is literally just as frustrating as getting the twins to relax on a plane," Daniel complains, Yuki smirking and biting the inside of his cheek as you finally cross the room to stand behind your husband.

"I dunno, I did pretty well--"

"--Holy shit!" Daniel shouts, barreling himself into you as he sweeps you off your feet in a loud laugh, "Oh my god! Hello! What?! When did you get here?!"

He sets you down after a tiny spin and presses a long kiss to your lips before you can explain, his hands firm on your hips and your arms tossed around his neck, just like puzzle pieces.

"Max got me passes, we got in last night. Blame the entirety of Red Bull." You wave a hand and Daniel kisses you once more, arms now wrapping around you.

"Okay, fuck strategy for a moment, I need this." He says to the Alpha Tauri team who wave him off and laugh, and you let Daniel just bury his face in the crook of your neck, breathing in the way too expensive Dior perfume he'd bought you for your birthday, and sigh out his stress.

"You have me and I have you." You murmur to him, pressing your lips to the side of his head, since it's all you can reach at this angle, a very similar angle to which his mini-me had been held in only a few hours prior.

"I know." He steps back, then blinks at you, "Wait. The twins are here too aren't they?"

"How the fuck--"

"You aren't wearing your necklace you always wear when you have someone babysit them for the weekend." He pokes the necklace you are wearing, one of your last names written in one of the prettiest fonts you'd ever seen, the gold blackened and dirty from its constant wear. A wedding gift from his mother.

"You little shit." You whisper, before turning and shouting, "Ella! Si!"

And it's like they were waiting for it because the sound of the door slamming against the wall followed by the patter of small sneakers sounds through the garage as the twins sprint to find you and their father. Their joyful screams overlap as Daniel drops to one knee to scoop both girls in his arms, fawning over their matching sundresses (custom-made to be the same color as his racing suit, as is the dress you wear) as he lifts them up to your height.

"Look at my girls." Daniel smiles, letting the twins babble on about whatever as he turns to press a kiss to your cheek, "Thank you."

"Thank Max." You step up to take Sienna from his arms so he can easily hold Rosella, but the arm you've freed snags you by the hip and pulls you close.

"There we go!" He grins at you, "All three of my girls in one place, yeah?"

And it's perfect, a little slotted puzzle piece, and regardless of if they figure out whatever issues are going on with the car you know Daniel will be loving every minute of Miami this year. Just because the three of you are there as his backbone.

[fatale-distraction]

BG3 Companions Social Media Headcanons Part 1

I was bored at work and couldn’t stop. 🤣 I’ll make another post with Halsin, Minthara, Jaheira, Minsc, and some NPCs!

~~~

Astarion - Pre-Tav, Astarion's social media is mostly thirst-traps for some kind of nefarious, Cazador-related money-making plot. They barely scoot past the TOS on lewd content. Very little real personal content, anything that isn't a thirst trap is heavily doctored lifestyle content to make it seem like he's living a much more luxurious life than he actually is.

After meeting Tav and getting rid of Cazador, he deletes all of his old accounts and opens up new ones. They're not exactly private, but he's much more careful about who he follows and who can follow him back. The posts become much more genuine. Still a lot of selfies, but they're sexy in the way of a guy just finally living his truth and being comfortable in his own skin. There's more shots of his daily life; waking up with his partner's obnoxious pets strewn across the bed, morning coffee and his current favorite book, new outfits that make him feel more himself. Tav features heavily in most of his posts, and there are probably as many pictures of them as there are of himself.

Karlach - chaos. No rhyme or reason. Lots of parkour and Jack-ass parodies. Constant flood of pictures of her stuffed animal collection. Stupid filters abound. There's several videos of her just flexing. Lumberjack videos. Seven hundred pictures of Tav, tons of selfies together. Videos of her literally sobbing over some cute stuffy she found or a dog she got to pet. "How many times can I say the fuck word before I get suspended." Memes. Memes everywhere.

Lae'zel - She follows three accounts and never posts anything, but somehow she's constantly scrolling through. What does she even do? Her profile picture is still the default. She doesn't have any profile information filled out. It just says "No." Her screen name is just Lae_zel. Every single item in her favorites is a cat video. She has One photo and its a gym selfie. All of her comments seem really mean at first, but they're all weirdly supportive things along the lines of "your teeth are sharp and your visage terrifying".

Shadowheart - total E-girl influencer vibe. Everything is #nofilter. She doesn't need filters. She's god's most perfect princess. You can't even be mad because it's not vanity its just how she Is. Ends everything with Prayer-hands-emoji hashtag Shar'sblessings or Selune'sblessings depending on where she is in that journey. Hairstyle and makeup tutorials and she makes it look so damn easy. "Dye my hair and cut my bangs with me." "Get ready with me" videos nearly every day. Every picture has a comment from Astarion that just says "oh fuck off" because even he can never hope to be as perfect as she is. Or at least that's what her forty-five thousand followers think.

Wyll - The official Blade of the Frontier social media account(s). Fencing videos and promos. "How to polish your horns for newbies" video that's been taken down twenty-seven times for lewd content even though it's literally for polishing actual horns. Accidental thirst traps because damn. Lots of disability advocacy, especially for visual impairments. Weekly Demon/Devil PSAs. Constantly featured in Karlach's vids and vice-versa. Buddy selfies. Once in a while a pic of him with his dad. Pics with Tav are rare, but when he does post them they're the sweetest pictures and he gushes about them for paragraphs. It's a little gross how gushy they are. Astarion comments with vomit emojis and Wyll just replies with an angry face emoji. The purest content. He's so wholesome. Not a swear to be seen. Lots of gentle hype videos. "You've got this. You can do this. I believe in you."

Gale - oh my god he has the most pretentious social media accounts. He's worse than Astarion. "Well, actually" videos with multiple parts because they're too long. Tea and bookshelves. Tara. So many pics of Tara. Tara napping on a book. Tara swatting a fly. Tara in the window. Tara on the kitchen counter. Tara laying in the sun. Tara doing nothing. He has one of those fancy cat terrarium backpacks. Magic tutorials. Mystra simp. Surprisingly few selfies but the ones he has are IMMACULATE. Pretentious book reviews. His only saving grace is that he is HILARIOUS. He's the only one with a reasonable about of pics with Tav as opposed to almost none or way too many, but the captions are always really sweet.

~~~

Part 2 here!

Part 3 here!

Part 4

[officialspec]

What do you think gay men are attracted to in men that they can’t be attracted to in women?

It can’t be anything about femininity or masculinity obviously. That’s both sexist, and cultural so can’t be what drives men-only attraction.

It can’t be anything about stated identity because someone could lie just as easily as they could tell the truth in such a statement, and it makes no sense because homosexuality and heterosexuality exists in other species with no stated identities. It’s not like other animals without gender are all pan.

Saying idk it’s the vibes or some indescribable trait men have that women can’t but “I can’t explain” is a nonanswer.

Soooooooo what is it? Or do you think any sexuality but bi/pan is just cultural performance or an identity rather than an inborn orientation?

- [ ]

first off i hate this ask and i think youre a freak. in any other world i wouldve blocked you for this but unfortunately for both of us i actually like this type of philosophy. dont send this shit to anyone else though

i dont think its right to compare human sexuality to the same thing in animals, to get that out of the way. im sure until a certain point it comes from the same biological impulses, but human beings have way more complicated social structures and reasons for coupling that just do not exist in other animals. our social behaviours are what make us unique in the animal kingdom and that definitely extends to gender and sexuality. so theres that

people love to tout 'gender is a social construct' around like its a criticism in and of itself, which i think betrays a misunderstanding about social constructs in general. theyre the foundations we build language on to better understand each other, and affected by a whole host of cultural and historical factors. just because theyre subjective and complicated doesnt mean they arent real. in terms of the effect they have on peoples lives they may be the most real thing that exists

for example, 'kindness' is a social construct. the definition and ways it is enacted differ greatly across personal and cultural lines. but no one would ever suggest a world where kindness doesnt exist or loses meaning, because its an essential part of the way we interact with each other (in the same way i dont really see a world where gender entirely ceases to exist, mainly just one where people have more fun with it. im not a psychic though so who knows)

similarly, sexuality in humans is another social construct. i think the driving biological forces behind it are very real, but the labels people attach to those impulses are subjective attempts to express their inner world to the people around them if that makes sense. and those same biological impulses are ALSO subject to social ideas of gender, because those ideas are established at birth and reinforced over a persons entire lifetime

to use myself as an example, im a gay trans man. ive identified as other things in the past, because i was trying to pick apart feelings i had and express them to others in an attempt to find community. my identity might change as i get older and experience new things, or it might not. i identify as gay because im not attracted to the social concept of women, and someone i would otherwise be attracted to might lose all appeal after i find out they fall under that concept (this has happened before w transfems pre and post coming out lol)

of course, the real REAL answer to this is that trying to give queer identities rigid and objective definitions is a fools errand, and also lame as fuck. someone might identify as gay and be more attracted to general masculinity than men as a social category, maybe they fool around with a couple of butch women without considering themself any less gay. two otherwise identical people might be a butch lesbian and a gay trans man without either of those identities coming into conflict. they might even be the same person at different times of the week

the labels people choose to use are communication tools, not objective signifiers. if you dont understand them, they probably arent talking to you

social constructs are everything. we as humans have the unique ability to interpret our own messy desires and impulses into words that other people can use to form an idea of someone else in their mind. its how we build connections, and of course it isnt perfect because trying to squeeze someones entire personal history and the centuries of context that defined it into a handful of syllables is going to leave some room for error. but its all we have, yknow? so we keep trying. and i think thats much more human than any imposed objective 'truth' could ever be

tldr we live in a society dipshit. get with it

[igotyupls]

Hey I asked for the previous yunjin fic and I have another for a male reader x her it’s like when all of them go to New York reader takes yunjin to his home town of Boston and they have dinner with his parents and after they go back to a hotel in New York and have a bath together then have fluffy sex thank you

It had been a whirlwind few weeks for LE SSERAFIM promoting their latest comeback album all across Asia with their tour ‘FLAME RISES’, And even flying around the States for their abroad schedules. Though the girls were energized seeing their international fans, the grueling schedule was starting to take its toll.

One evening after wrapping up their final work day for the week in New York City, Yunjin collapsed exhausted on one of the couches of her and her members hotel suite.

"I don't know how much more I can take, unnie," she murmured to the leader of Lesserafim,

Kim Chaewon, who patted her back in a way she hoped was soothing, even though she's just as tired, if not more.

As the two groupmates are relaxing on the couch, Yunjin's phone suddenly lit up with a text from her boyfriend Y/N, who had come to several of the group's shows to support his girl.

"Wanna get away for some R&R this weekend? My parent's want to meet you" He wrote.

Yunjin perked up at the thought of seeing Y/N and the chance to recharge. "Unnie, do you think the company would let me take a couple days off if I went with Y/N to visit his family?" She asked Chaewon with pleading puppy eyes.

to which Chaewon smiled knowingly. "I think after this week, you've earned a little break. Let me talk to the managers."

A few hours later, everything was approved. Yunjin excitedly called Y/N to share the good news and make plans to fly out to Boston together the next day to meet his parents.

On the flight, Yunjin dozed contentedly against Y/N's shoulder for the entirety of the hour long flight, already feeling some of her tiredness disappear in her boyfriend’s comforting presence.

Touching down in Boston, Y/N drove quietly as the radio played a random tune while Yunjin finished her nap a little longer. Pulling up outside his family home, Yunjin took a deep breath, suddenly nervous as she walked up to the front door,

But all her worries vanished the moment she was pulled into a warm hug by Y/N's mother,

"Welcome, welcome! It's so nice to finally meet our son's girlfriend. I've heard so much about you!" She says genuinely.

And more into the night over a much needed home-cooked meal, Yunjin charmed Y/N's parents with stories of LE SSERAFIM and her own fun from her opera days. She was touched by their warm hospitality, feeling instantly at ease.

Later, curled up on the sofa, Yunjin sighed contentedly in Y/N's arms. "Thank you for bringing me here babe. This is for real what I needed to recharge."

Y/N pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead. "Anything for you, babe."

But as the night deepened, Yunjin began to feel the effects of her long travels catching up to her. "I think it's time we turned in, what do you say?" Y/N smiled down at her tired form nestled against his chest.

"Mom set you up in the guest room, but you're welcome to bunk with me if you'd like."

Truth be told, the idea of curling up beside Y/N under cozy blankets was far more appealing than sleeping alone.

"I'd like that," Yunjin replied softly. Hand in hand they made their way upstairs, Y/N pointing out family photos, his goofy smiles and random shots along the walls before reaching the door to his childhood bedroom.

The house had a vibe that was uniquely Y/N. Football posters and vinyl's lined the walls, knickknacks all over the place on the shelves.

She smiled to see photos of the two of them mixed with pictures of his past, of him growing up, of him playing and yada yada.

Stepping inside, Yunjin ran her hand along the old, scratched wood of his desk, imagining a younger Y/N hunched over doing homework.

The bed was neatly made, with his favorite colored sheets and 3 pillows, almost inviting her to lay on it.

Y/N watched her explore with adoring eyes, always loving being able to share parts of himself with her. "It's not a lot, but it's home i guess," he says with a shrug and a chuckle.

Yunjin turned to him, cupping his face in her hands. "It tells me so much about the great man my boyfriend is. I feel like I know you even better coming here."

Leaning in, their lips met in a soft kiss filled with care, trust and understanding.

Breaking the kiss reluctantly, Yunjin moved to unpack a few items from her bag as Y/N changed into his sleep clothes.

The familiar routine of her nightly routine brought her comfort. Sliding under the covers, she sighed contentedly as Y/N's arm curled around her slim waist, drawing her close against the solid planes of his body. Their breaths and heartbeats syncing as sleep takes over them from the long journey of the day

Sunlight was filtering through the curtains when Yunjin woke up the next morning. For a moment she was disoriented, not recognizing where she was. Then the memories of the previous day flooded back mixed with a rush of gratitude and happiness.

Rolling over, she saw Y/N still sleeping peacefully beside her. His features soft and slacking in sleep, lips slightly ajar as he snored softly.

Reaching out, Yunjin gently brushed back a lock of hair from his forehead, letting her fingers linger tracing the lines of his cheekbone, the curve of his lips.

Sensing her touch, Y/N began to stir, blinking awake to smile warmly up at her. "Good morning, beautiful," he murmured in a sleep-husky, velvety voice that sent a jolt through her spine.

Leaning in, their lips met in a lazy kiss conveying all the love and affection they felt.

As the kiss deepened, getting sloppier, Yunjin felt the familiar pulls of desire stirring in her abdomen.

It had been too long since they'd fucked, both of their schedules keeping them way too busy.

Y/N seemed to sense her rising horniness, as his hands began to roam with confidence over her curvy body still under the blanket and her sleep clothes.

A soft sigh escaped Yunjin's lips feeling his hands, her body arching into his on its own, wanting more contact.

Y/N took the invitation, flipping himself and her so she was under him, without breaking their kiss.

Through the fabric of her clothes, she could feel his morning wood pressing against her thigh, stirring a fresh wave of horniness in her.

Breaking the kiss breathlessly and swollen, Yunjin looked up at Y/N with lusty eyes. "Fuck me," she said, her own voice raspy.

That was all the initiative Y/N needed as he dunked in kissing her again, tongue sliding through her parted lips as his hands moved in tandem, taking her clothes off.

Yunjin shivered as the cold morning air touched her bare legs, tits and arms, nipples hardening to peaks.

She helped take his own clothes off, eager as fuck to feel his muscles against her.

At last as his boxer got tossed across the room, Yunjin wrapped her legs around his waist, while grabbing his dick and inserting it inside her dripping cunt.

Both moaning at finally joining after so long without sex, Y/N stayed still, blissed out feeling her tight, dripping hole clench his dick so snugly even after taking him a billion times.

Under him, Yunjin squirmed, impatient for him to fuck her stupid. "Please… fucking move," she begged, raking her nails down his back encouragingly.

With a hum in response, Y/N started to rock his hips in a slow, deep pace still a bit hazy having just woken up.

Lost in the feeling, they moved together lazily.

Yunjin met Y/N pump for pump, taking him fully to the hilt and clenching tighter with each thrust. The slapping of his balls hitting her ass mingled with their moans filled his small room.

Y/N began to redouble his efforts, picking up pace as his hips snap powerfully as he chased his and Yunjin's orgasm.

Reaching down, his fingers started rubbing Yunjin's clit in circles. That was all it took to break her, back arching off the mattress as jolts after jolts wracked her body.

Her walls clenching vice-like around Y/N's dick still pounding her into his mattress relentlessly, pulling his own orgasm from him with a groan.

Ropes after ropes of hot semen spurt inside her, painting Yunjin's inner walls white, as he fucked her through the aftershocks together, in a blissed out haze.

Collapsing in a sweaty, tired mess, they took a few moments to catch their breaths.

Yunjin turned her head lazily to press a kiss to Y/N's sweaty shoulder, murmuring lovey dovey shit. And him responding with a lazy dopey smile, eyes crinkling in the corners.

"That was fucking amazing. I missed being with you like this so much," Y/N mumbled sighing, as he ran his fingers up and down Yunjin's side.

She hummed in agreement, snuggling closer against his chest listening to the frantic thumps of his heartbeat slowly returning to normal. His arms encircled her holding her close.

Yunjin stretched luxuriously in the bed against his chest, enjoying the post-sex glow before reality set back in.

Glancing at Y/N beside her, having rolled off, she smiled at his messed up, lazy look. "Not a bad way to start the day, huh?" she teased, tracing idle patterns on his chest, As he chuckles.

But the spell is broken as A knock and his mom's muffled voice reminded them of breakfast waiting, "Kids, you up? Breakfast is ready whenever you are,"

Yunjin's stomach rumbled in agreement. "Food does sound good. And your Mom's cooking is no joke," she whispered to Y/N grinning,

"We'll be down in a bit, mom, thanks!" Y/N called back chuckling as he pats Yunjin's flat stomach after hearing the rumble, before rolling from the bed to begin gathering their clothes.

Over a hearty breakfast of pancakes, eggs, bacon and fruits, Yunjin chatted animatedly with his parents about their plans for the day.

"I was hoping to show Yunjin around some of my favorite spots, maybe catch a Sox game if the timing works out?" Y/N said with a mouthful of pancakes.

His dad grinned. "Take my car, it'll be easier than public transports with your schedule. And here, take some cash - I insist on treating my future daughter-in-law to a nice lunch out." he says passing car keys and some cash to Y/N.

Yunjin ducked her head, cheeks warming at the endearing term, far beyond grateful for the way Y/N's family welcomed her since the start of yesterday to now.

"Thank you so much for your generosity and hospitality Mr. and Mrs L/N," she said with a smile as Y/N's hand found hers under the table, giving her a gentle squeeze.

Once the breakfast came to an end, Yunjin and Y/N set off to explore the city Y/N grew up in.

Their first stop was the harbor, which was filled seagulls and fishing boats, not to mention the crowds of people.

Yunjin leaned over the railing to take it all in, breathing in the sea air, genuinely feeling the refreshment after months of being shut indoors and traveling to buildings, stadiums and back.

"It's so peaceful here," she murmured with a contented sigh.

Y/N slipped his arm around her waist, pressing a kiss to her temple. "This is nice huh? I used to come here to…. Think, relax, play, u name it." He says with a slight laugh as he tilts his head and looks at her

Turning in his arms, Yunjin smiled up at her loving boyfriend "Yeah? It really is nice.. Thank you, like really.. you know, for sharing your special places with me." She says, and the response she gets in the smile Y/N gives her more than any word he could’ve said.

And then as the time goes their next stop happens to be walking through the Boston Commons, taking in the leaves and families enjoying their afternoon.

Yunjin spotted a street performer juggling and doing tricks, laughing, she turns to Y/N,

"You'd give him a run for his money," she teased Y/N, who makes a faux hurt face, "puhlease, my juggling skills are elite, thank you very much."

As they continued on, Yunjin spotted a food truck selling crepes. "Ooh, can we try one? I'm starving." She says dramatically,

Making Y/N chuckle, "Sureee, Go pick the flavors." After paying, they stroll around, finding a bench to eat, while feeding each other bites and laughing at the mess they're making.

Yunjin savored these carefree moments away from the pressures of being an idol, the constant scrutiny and the lack of privacy, just enjoying life with the person she loved and adored.

Soon Their afternoon started winding down, with catching the last bit of a Red Sox game from the box seats courtesy of Y/N's dad's connections, and of course Yunjin’s status,

Yunjin cheered alongside the loud and roaring Boston fans, completely entertained by the atmosphere.

As the sun began to set, Y/N drove them to a hole in the wall near the waters.

Over plates of pasta, garlic bread and red wine, they talked about everything and nothing at the same time, laughing and joking like a bunch of tweens.

And after finishing their food, they wandered through the Public Garden, pausing to admire the swans gliding thru the waters. Under one of the trees, with little to no people nearby,

Y/N turns to Yunjin, taking her hands in his, and softly kissing her palm.

"Thank you for coming here with me babe, for letting me share this part of myself, even though you have this insane schedule to follow, " He says with a chuckle,

“I mean it really, I love you” he murmurs, leaning in and kissing her, soft and gentle.

And as the night grew colder they finally, got back in the car and headed home, fingers laced together on top of the console as Y/N drove them back to his childhood home,

but all too soon their little weekend getaway was coming to an end, Y/N and Yunjin’s flight being at midnight to fly back to New York,

Yunjin bids a sad goodbye to Y/N's parents, promising to visit again soon. His mom hugs her tight. "You're always welcome here, sweetheart."

In the car on the way to the airport, Yunjin rests her head on Y/N's shoulder. "Thank you for the best weekend. I really needed this."

Y/N kisses the top of her head. "I'm glad. I'll miss you."

At the airport, they linger in a hug. "I booked a suite at your hotel in New York. Want to come over after we land?" Y/N asks.

Yunjin smiles. "I'd love that."

They fly back to JFK, taking an Uber straight to the hotel.

There, Y/N checks into the lavish suite as Yunjin texts her manager and her members that she'll be with Y/N for the night.

Inside the suite, Yunjin sighs. "This place is amazing." she says, as She wraps her arms around Y/N's waist from behind, resting her head against his back. "Thank you for doing this."

Y/N turns in her arms, caressing her cheek. "You deserve to relax, Want to take a bath?"

In the massive bathroom, Y/N runs warm water into the jacuzzi tub as Yunjin lights candles and dumps bath bombs into it.

They undress slowly, giving each other gentle kisses.

Once Naked, Yunjin sinks into the bubbles, leaning back against Y/N's bare chest with a relaxed hum as his arms wrap around her. "This is perfect," she murmurs.

They soak in silence, Y/N occasionally pressing kisses to Yunjin's neck and shoulders.

His hands slide lazily over her skin, rememorizing her curves.

Yunjin turns her head to meet Y/N's lips in a deep kiss.

His hands move to cup her tits, thumbs teasing her nipples until she's whimpering into his mouth.

"Y/N…" she says his name breathlessly.

She reaches back to grasp his growing dick, stroking him to his full length.

Y/N groans, biting her shoulder gently as his fingers find her clit.

She gasps at the contact, grinding into his hand and pushing back against his hard on. "Please, I need you inside me…"

Y/N lifts her wihtout a sweat out of the tub, laying her on the plush bathmat.

He settles between her thighs, kissing down her body lazily until his tongue replaces his thumb, lapping at her slcik pussy lips.

Yunjin cries out, raking her fingers through his hair to hold him against her as the tension coils tighter.

When she orgasms, her back arches off the tiles, Y/N laps up her nectar like a starving man.

Once her orgasm subsides, Y/N positions himself at her pussy.

"Look at me," he murmurs, pushing in slowly inch by inch until he's fully sheathed.

Yunjin moans at the fullness, locking eyes with Y/N's dark gaze. "You feel so good daddy," she whimpers, wrapping her legs around his waist.

Y/N sets a deep, lazy pace.

Balls slapping against her ass as their breaths mingle in between their kisses. Yunjin runs her nails down his back, urging him faster.

He hooks her leg over his shoulder for a new angle, immediately finding her g-spot inside her that makes colors burst behind her eyelids.

"There, don't stop, Y/N!" she screams,

Her walls start fluttering around him as another orgasm starts building.

Y/N pounds into her relentlessly, chasing his own release.

"cum for me," he rumbles in her ear, "Cum for daddy jen" he says shattering her with a squeaky moan,

The grip of her walls draw Y/N's orgasm from him and he spills spurts of semen inside her with a groan.

They lay on the bathmat still connected as their frantic heartbeats slow down, sharing lazy kisses.

Y/N brushes the damp hair from Yunjin's forehead. "You're so fucking pretty."

She smiles in response, scratching his cheek softly, "That was perfect, baby"

After finally getting off the floor and dressing into the plush robes, Y/N orders a feast of food from the room service - sushi, steak, pasta, sweets, champagne, you name it.

They feed each other bites between kisses, playfully stealing food from each other's plates.

Later, curled half naked on bed with the remains of their meal, Yunjin traces patterns on Y/N's chest. "I don't want this night to end," she murmurs sadly.

Y/N presses a kiss to her forehead, smirking "One more round before sleep?"

Yunjin grins, straddling his hips. She takes him in her hand, stroking his flaccid dick to its full length ,

Before sinking down slowly as they moan in unison. Bracing her hands on his chest, she sets a steady rhythm, eyes closed.

Under her, Y/N watches her ride him, his hands roam her curves, rubbing and pinching her nipples.

When he feels her walls start fluttering around him, Y/N sits up to take one nipple in his mouth.

His suckling sends Yunjin over the edge for the third time this night with a cry, walls clenching down on him.

With a pleased hum, Y/N starts bouncing her on his dick holding her hips before following her over the edge.

As his dick grows soft again, Yunjin collapses against his chest as they kiss through eachothers aftershocks.

Y/N lays down onto the pillows, Yunjin still on him as he pulls the blankets over their tired, sweaty bodies.

"I love you so much," he whispers, nuzzling her neck.

Yunjin's eyes are already shut as she sighs contentedly. "Love you too."

In each other's arms, surrounded by the mixed heady scents of their orgasms and sweat, they slip into a nice, much needed sleep.

a- honestly how the fuck do people write so many words? jesus this took me two whole weeks, well in my defense i barely got time to write each day cause of training but holy hell, this is like w/c: 3300 maybe, anyway, i hope you enjoy man and reqs are open but i doubt i'll post consecutively

[demaparbat-hp]

I used to just think Zutara was cool because Zuko and Katara had that whole fire-water duality, had more chemistry with each other than their canon love interests, Kataang gave me this sexist pseudo-incestuous vibe while Mai was just way too under-developed to interest me (Zuko gets the most character development out of all the characters but they pair him off with the most boring character in the series?).

Now when I actually think about it more deeply, Zutara genuinely made more sense for the narrative and characters too. Aang was told he had to let go of Katara so he could become a fully realized Avatar but then he just gets a deus ex machina so he doesn't have to. They dropped an entire arc just for Kataang to get together and made it happen in the most stupid way. The lion turtle deus ex machina was already badly done but at least it sorta made sense with the lore. The rock was just beyond ridiculous. Aang solved his problems by randomly hitting a rock even though they already established how Aang had this unhealthy attachment to Katara because she was his coping mechanism for his lost people. Instead of letting her go, Aang keeps that attachment and becomes even more possessive of her. He never learns to prioritize the world over Katara even though it is his duty as the Avatar! He didn't have to sacrifice or learn anything to achieve his goals and the way he became a fully realized Avatar NEVER made any sense. Katara and Aand were not always intended to end up together if you look at the IP Bible. Katara goes back to the SWT to help rebuild it while Aang goes looking for the hidden Air Nomads. There's hints early on in Book 1 that the Air Nomads are still alive (like how Aang was able to get a bison whistle from some merchants but they never explain where they got it from).

Meanwhile the whole Maiko relationship seemed like it was a metaphor to represent Zuko's false destiny and dissatisfaction with his life since Mai encouraged him to sink into his bad habits and ignore everything else, and Azula actively encouraged them to get together so she could control Zuko easier and keep him in the Fire Nation. Zuko leaving Mai behind felt like him embracing his true destiny. This entire thing falls apart when they get back together though, and them being so toxic in the comics is just further proving how dysfunctional they are (like, do they think this is going to sell us on the ship?). I also thought it was strange that apparently Zuko and Mai liked each other since they were kids but Mai never bothered to write him his entire banishment, Zuko never thought about her, Iroh never mentions her, Zuko was totally fine with going on a date with Jin (which Iroh also encouraged), and Iroh thought Zuko and Katara would make a good couple as soon as he saw them interacting as friends. It makes me think Bryke just created Mai and put her with Zuko as a way to discourage Zutara shippers but then forgot to develop her properly. Zuko doesn't even think about Mai after she risked his life to save him lol.

I'm about to make this a long answer, sorry about that :)

I love narrative, and I love to analyze how it is built. Narrative is the way a story is shaped to express its themes. Narrative is using the events within the story to build metaphors. Narrative is the smart foreshadowing, the parallels, the foils. Narrative is intentional, until it isn't.

I am not a professional. I do not have a college degree on this subject. I just like to think about what can make writing be great or lacking. I am merely expressing my personal opinion on this show and these characters, not stating an universal truth.

ATLA is such a well-written show. It treats its themes maturely and builds the story and characters masterfully. Of course, it isn't perfect, as nothing made by human hands is meant to be. ATLA has issues with its storyline and characters and, ultimately, with the narrative itself.

Aang's character arc is different to Zuko's in that, while Zuko's is focused on change, Aang's ultimately ends with him standing his ground. (And isn't that poetic? That in order to grow they need to embrace the philosophy of their opposite element?)

Zuko was forced to change in order to survive from a very young age. He learned to suppress his true, compassionate nature, to become The Perfect Prince—that which Azula embodies. When Zuko fails to do this, he is burnt and tossed away and forced to change once more. He has been hurt and thus is the farthest he has ever been from his true self—Zuko almost forgets who he is.

Zuko's arc, in that way, is similar to Aang's. It's about staying true to himself, but also about learning, about opening his eyes to the horror and using that same passion he has always had to do the right thing. Zuko changes, not into the person he was, but into someone who could, in the future, turn into the better version of himself.

Aang is different. Aang is a child born into peace, who does not have the personal, terrible experience of his people's genocide or the hundred years of war that have left the world wrecked. Aang's arc is about changing and learning and adapting to this new reality, about accepting his role as the Avatar. But it's also about standing firm and saying, "This is who I am, this is where I come from—pain will not break me".

Aang's struggle to control the Avatar State was all about that. The Avatar State meant that Aang lost control. It meant the pain and the hurt had turned him into a thing of anger (righteous as it was) and instinct and awe. Aang needed to be at peace with himself in order to control the Avatar State.

That tiny rock at the final battle felt like an easy way out. It felt like taking from the sheer terror of watching yourself almost kill a man as if from afar. The real moment of triumph for Aang in the finale happened when he stopped. It happened when he took control back and ended the Avatar State, stopping himself from betraying what he believed in.

Was not killing Ozai truly the best choice? I won't get into that debate. I know where I stand on it, but it's not really the point I'm trying to make here.

Aang's triumph, character-wise, happens when he stands his ground and refuses to abandon who he is and what he believes in. And for someone whose flight or fight response almost always turns to flight, this is a huge deal.

Now, where do Katara and Mai stand on this?

It has always been clear to me (even as a Maiko shipper) that Mai was always supposed to be a narrative device. Her relationship with Zuko is supposed to give us, the viewers, and him, another reason to see that this isn't the life he wants, that everything isn't perfect even when it should be on paper.

Zuko goes back home. Zuko is welcomed by his nation with open arms. He is revered. Loved. His father tells him he is proud of him. Zuko has a doting girlfriend—a beautiful, noble girl who can kick his ass and is everything a Fire Prince could wish for. She is adequate and things with her are easy, untroubled. Zuko has everything he could wish for.

And yet he is not happy.

Mai and Zuko have issues that should not be pinned fully on either of them. They had trouble comunicating. They wanted different things in life. They had different ways to look at the world. Different ways to look at each other. Different ways to cope. Different ways to express themselves. Different expectations.

And that's okay. It's possible to make a relationship like that work. Nobody is perfect and no relationship is flawless. Opposites attract and it's possible to find a middle ground in which they can both be happy.

Except they never truly did.

Mai and Zuko's relationship was a plot device. One that did its job damn well... Until it didn't.

If your relationship with the girl is supposed to symbolize the lowest point in your life, and going back into being someone you don't like anymore, then why get back to her when the story is over?

As for Katara, well...

Many things have been said about the abandoned Letting Go Of Katara arc. I'd like to avoid that discussion right now, if that's okay.

I think Zuko and Katara's relationship would have made a lot of sense both narratively and thematically, but also (and most importantly) it would have made sense character-wise.

Give them a few years, let them explore the beautiful friendship they had at the end of the series. Let them find themselves and grow into their roles in this different, exciting new world. Let them reconnect.

If they fall in love in the process? Well, maybe it was a long time coming.

[hotdogdynamitezzz]

Astrological Hidden Gems

Disclaimer: This won't apply to everyone, astro police plz chill. Just have fun and vibe bitches, and if you don't relate that's totally fine just don't be rude. Comment your experiences down below 👇

Vedic Nakshatra Observations:

Idk much about vedic but I've learnt a little about some nakshatras, bear with me there will be more next time.

🪐 Anuradha Moons & Mercury's can see the dead, they are often familiar with paranormal experiences occuring because being the nakshatra of friendship, gateways, and unity. It's in Scorpio debilitated, which creates a spiritual unity with spirits and occult giving them clear intuition and many otherworldly experiences. They can most likely communicate with ghosts.

🌌 Chitra can be very critical and harsh, more so than most nakshatras. They are ruled by the tiger and are associated with jewels and royalty so their expectations are extremely high. They are the type to call you on your bullshit in front of whoever to assert social dominance in a strategic way. They could have participated in bullying or get into scandals involving their attitude. It's important for them to keep their image though so you won't often see them act out. The OG mean girl nakshatra in my opinion.

Tropical Astrology:

🕊 Scorpio moons aren't the nicest people tbh, in fact most often they're known for being rude or belittling people without even being aware of it. They are ruled by pluto the god of the underworld and traditionally mars the god of war. Putting two and two together you shouldn't expect this water moon sign to be nurturing and caring and that's why the moon falls in scorpio. However, they do care extremely deeply but instead of comforting you they will tell the honest hard truth from their perspective and will think they're always right even when they're not. They can become overly controlling this way and obssess over all your problems for you so set some boundaries. Their advice isn't for everyone.

🌌 I do have to say though, every scorpio moon I've met no matter how many layers or how matured they are. Everytime I've witnessed someone run to them for comfort and tell them personal problems, the scorpio moon will hold this over them as blackmail later or gossip about it to their other close friends. As much as they're secretive with themselves, they sure as hell won't be with you because being ruled by pluto and mars they crave power and feel unsafe if they can't maintain power over others. Therefore, the whole scorpio is so loyal stereotype isn't always true. They can often pose as the opposite sorry.

🪐 Fuckboy aspects are Mars - Jupiter. Every single time I've read a sexually active almost sex addictive with some commitment issues chart. Its always had this aspect, in greek mythology jupiter is associated with zeus and that man got every bitch pregnant like the earth was dying or sum💀 he was horny as hell, polyamourus as hell, and literally couldn't keep his dick out of anything. So honestly in combination with venus or mars aspects, 5th & 8th house jupiter, and jupiter dominant charts. You are looking at a sex addict my friend.

💗 The 4th and 10th house are associated with household names and royalty. Most of the british royals have major 4th & 10th house placements like king charles, queen elizabeth, kate middleton, and so on. Your 4th house is your legacy and household name, and your 10th house rules over what you achieved in this life, and the power you achieve and use over the public. Having planets such as venus in the 4th or 10th house means you are the standard for beauty and could hold power over others with it or in your workplace peoples looks hold authority over you. Celebrities considered the most beautiful will often have their venus in the 4th house.

💡Afflicted 4th - 10th house axis like: Aries in 4th - Libra in 10th, Scorpio in 4th - Taurus in 10th, and Capricorn in 4th - Cancer in 10th denotes the responsibility of building your worth up through the value of you work. This is because no one valued you from birth, these I.C's never experienced encouragement or help from their family, instead most of the time their family was their enemy and they grew with these troubles into adulthood. People with afflicted 4th houses know they don't have anything, their own personal power is stripped from them at birth so they have to gain value from others and power in their career. This is why a lot of afflicted midheavens tend to be famous but come from awful backgrounds or have horrible mental health problems. However, they tend to value people much more strongly, they just to have a dark past and work from the dirt up. Their insecurities most often push them away from achieving their dreams sadly, but once they gain their own self worth you will see them flourish.

🌲 People can bring up the argument that these I.C's could be born into powerful rich families, especially Scorpio & Capricorn I.C's but as kids they still were never valued, only their money and reputation was. Overall, poor or rich the afflicted I.C 's - M.C's axis path in life is to find their own value through their work and gain personal power after. While the Benefic I.C - M.C axis use their own personal power they found through loved ones early on to give value to the work they do.

💗 Pisces are the most manipulative sign, neptune literallycreates illusions so they have the ability to create any confusion or misunderstandingthat will go unnoticed. Most of the time they are unaware they have this power but pisces is related to the higher realm and spiritual power so often times they just seem to KNOW everything about you even if you've never said anything before. They can sense it all unknowingly.

🌌 Scorpio risings are oddly chill and their presence isn't really felt unless they have pluto or mars their chart rulers in the 1st & 10th house. Other than that they're the misunderstood quiet kids with a rbf who are unexpectedly so accepting but you think they're judging the hell outta you lmao

💡 Scorpio risings also tend to be a bit paranoid and overthink everything, being ruled by the water element and mars they're sensitive to any change in their environment and quick to react. The only difference is their reaction is internalized by the water element so they may not lose their cool easily but you can seem them easily annoyed by even the smallest of things. Their habit of overthinking everything can also make them assume the worst in people but they just need to evaluate people before getting close, not the type to chat you up before staring you down.

I actually love Scorpio risings, don't take that the wrong way just explaining their behavior I've noticed

🌲 But those with Pluto in the 1st house- wow their presence most definitely CAN be felt once they decide to speak up. They go unnoticed until they decide to show themselves, then all of a sudden an entire classroom will be sucked into their words as they speak, it's almost hypnotizing like a snake.

🌌 Virgo risings make quick judgements on people but aren't the type to nag, more so secretly set things up for you in advance like appointments, reminders,even your morning coffee. They just know because they can feel the slight changes in you as virgo is associated with health and the body. They're pretty intuitive too just in a physical sense, the type to always get gut feelings about people. You can't play them period, those hard to get mf's lmao

🪐 The most underrated beauty indicator imo are virgo risings and virgo venuses. Virgo risings are the runway models and look nothing like how we stereotype them. They usually have slick thin straight hair, big eyes, and HIGH cheekbones. Their faces are sculpt to perfection in a heavenly angel sense while pisces risings look like dolls and capricorn risings look more intimidating and defined. But seriously virgo rising women are stunning and it's a common placement in models. They also have pouty lips?

🕊 Virgo venuses are gorgeous too but in a girl next door vibe. They are oddly mischievous sometimes which is unexpected but so witty and caring. I kinda hate how to astro community describes them as moms in every single post because I haven't met one virgo placement that actually nags and criticizes people lmao? Virgos are so socially aware they won't do anything that makes them look bad even if they're tempted. But they will try to do everything in their power to help you, they're more action oriented than people think it's just behind the scenes.

💗 Virgo venuses tho will act like they hate you if they have a crush on you and try to get involved in your life or anything you're working on, that's the secret code. They love hiding for some reason, they're just scared to let you see their flaws so they hate having crushes. If you want them to like you, just be funny and talk to them they love funny people because they're ruled by mercury and it stimulates them. Literally say the dumbest funniest shit and they will laugh their ass off, they won't criticize you yet

🌌 Leo risings aren't arrogant or confident, in fact they're the most insecure rising sign I've come across and its because the rising sign shows Leo's ego and heart on display to the public, if they feel as if they're lacking they will overcompensate and try to fake arrogance. They vakue compliments and genuinely kind people so much due to how delicate their public image is and how they feel on the inside, but this is why they always seem to be the best hype people. They just get others insecurities from feeling their own and know how people feel (leo rules over the heart)

🌲 Imo Leos are more individualistic than Aquarius from what I've seen. All fire risings have "I'm different & special" syndrome istg, their need for validation and to be liked IS REAL. If you wanna insult a fire rising especially leo just call them mid, they can't handle it and find it more offensive than cursing at them.

🪐 Aquarius placements believe no one is special because humans are all equal so they are able to dissociate from their egos. This is why they often seem unbothered, cold and sometimes mean. They just didn't grow up with parents who valued their differences and often blend into the community

💡 Uranus doms on the other hand...are like shocwaves, they are the definition of "I'm different" but because they're outcasted so often from being viewed as weird even though they're always 10 steps ahead. But their shocking factor isn't for everyone and they often cause disruptions and accidents without meaning too, it's just their presence and effect ya know. They're seriously hilarious tho

💗 Libra moons aren't people pleasers, they like to start conflict behind the scenes. They just call themselves people pleasers but like to start drama and pin it on someone else...hahaha they can be evil little shits. Their emotions do seem to depend on how much people like them tho, if aomeone dislikes them they will be SO upset because they view it as unfair judgment casted onto them.

🪐 Real talk - Cancer rising women don't get enough credit, they have the same charisma as Leo risings just in a more feminine approachable manner. People find them sooo easy to talk and rant to. They can gain the trust of anyone and have THE BIGGEST eyes ever omg. Girls in particular love being friends with them while guys seem to obsess over them a lottt like a lot. They can attract stalkers just because their moon energy pulls people in it seems and magnetizes them. People become emotionally attached to cancer risings its concerning actually.

🌲 The 8th house shows your DNA regenerated as this is the house of regeneration and blood, so look at your 8th house if you're curious about your future children. The 5th house has to do with YOUR personal childhood and how children perceive you, the 4th house will be your home environment, your moon sign and house placement will indicate how you act as a mom and the home environment you seek to create.

🌌 As someone who had been offered to be in a polyamourus relationship with a girl even though I've never dated before, I have uranus conjunct my descendant in aquarius exactly. I've had more lgtbq+ experience in romance than hetero and I think most with uranus in the 5th, 7th & conjunct venus, ascendant or descendant will relate. I just feel comfier in that environment tbh guys scare me LMAOO

That's all for today, this post was long due and I have a true crime post coming up next cheers 🥂

[catcze]

here me out.. so like i was scrolling a pinterest and i found this one song on spotify called “cigarettes out the window x dangerously yours” and the first thing i thought about is neuvillette!! LIKE THE BRAINROTS IN MY HEAD RN. reader and him are in his office 😱

OH OH OH OH OH OKAY HOLD ON HOL D ONNNN 👀👀👀👀 The way i opened YT so fast!??! HASKJDNA but my GOD do i see what u mean anon—

I'm getting vibes of reader who is, perhaps, from the fatui? or from some other hostile organization (idk im workign on it 💔) and they get assigned to be a double agent at the Palais Mermonia and acquire sensitive information for the organization they work for. Initially, they weren't supposed to do anything complicated— they certainly weren't even supposed to ever cross paths with the chief justice of Fontaine. But what do you know, Neuvillette falls for you first and invites you out to a meal, and you can't necessarily refuse.

Your superiors are delighted by the change in plans— if you get closer to the chief justice, you could easily get your hands on all sorts of information! So, although you're hesitant, you're forced to go along with getting closer to Neuvillette. But over time, you find that he's much, much more than most people think he is. He's more caring and gentle that most realize, and he's so sweet. Gods, he is so sweet. The way he cares for every single melusine is adorable. The way he enthusiastically encourages you to try water that he imported from gods-knows-where, just because he says that it taste fresh and clear like no other. And the way his eyes shine when you take a sip and tell him that he's right, that it's sp distinct, and he smiles, and you don't have the heart to tell him that in truth, it just tastes like water to you.

Before you know it, you're actually falling for Neuvillette. Not for the mission, not for the files. You're genuinely becoming head over heels for him. You can't tell your superiors this— you know you'd be pulled out and disposed of immediately now that you're compromised, but you can't go along with deceiving Neuvillette anymore. But if you tell him... no doubt he'd turn you away, like the double-crosser you are.

But you still find yourself in front of his office anyway, a heavy hand and a heavier heart knocking on his doors.

"Come in," he says.

And it's hard. Gods, it's so hard to come clean to him. You stutter and you just can't seem to spit out the words, so Neuvillette decides to talk first. He pulls something out of a drawer and sets it on his desk, opening its contents for you to see. And you gasp, because these are the files that you had been told were the highest priority. If you ever got your hands on them, you were to risk your life to get them back to your organization.

"Why are you showing me this?" You ask him, voice quiet, brow furrowed. Your hand reaches out to touch the papers, but you hesitate. Neuvillette just watches you, smiling mysteriously.

"Because you have my wholehearted trust," is all he says, and it's enough to break you.

The tears come flowing faster than you can help them. There's a lump in your throat, making it hard to breathe. Even as you splutter out the words, the confessions to why you're here, why you got close to him, and everything else in between, Neuvillette listens patiently. He doesn't yell, doesn't glare or curse you out. He doesn't shout for guards to come and toss you into the darkest pits of Meropide. Instead, he's calm.

"I know," he says as a means of explanation, and you still. His hand reaches across the desk, holding yours gently. "Since the very first day we met, when you stood beside me drenched in rain on the balcony, I've known. And my heart is yours anyway."

You shake your head, still crying quietly. "I will betray you. If not, I will be killed."

Neuvillette's hand squeezes yours. "Do you think so little of me that I would allow any harm to befall you, my love?"

"I think the world of you," you argue, and he smiles.

"There is no safer place for you than by my side. Should there be any threat to your life, I would use every ounce of my power to dispose of it, " Neuvillette vows. "Your organization has made a great many mistakes, but the greatest of them all has been sending you to me, and expecting me to ever let harm befall you."

HAJSDSAJKL LISTEN the monologue in the clip that i found (hopefully we're talking abt the same mashup ?!?!?) was longer + had more drama but OUGH my brain craves soft sweet tender romance without too much drama and life-or-death haksdkajs

[omegalomania]

What are some of your favorite aro-/ace-coded fob lyrics?

oh fuck yes a little bowl of seeds just for me

boycott love from disloyal order of water buffaloes is a personal favorite of mine. its a lyric i really really want tattooed at some point. that's not the only lyric i latch onto from an aro perspective but it's probably the biggest one

basically the entirety of it's hard to say "i do" when i don't but a special mention goes to you are appealing to emotions that i simply do not have as well as the only ring i want buried with me are the ones around my eyes

it's true romance is dead / i shot it in the chest and in the head from the music or the misery is also a favorite of mine, also just that whole song in general

i thought i loved you but it was just how you looked in the light in hum hallelujah resonates with a lot of queer folks i've found, and it's no different for me

same goes for it's a strange way of saying that i know i'm supposed to love you from g.i.n.a.s.f.s.

i'm outside the door, invite me in / so we can go back and play pretend from alone together brings me back to when i was trying to perform heteronormativity/amatonormativity even if it was making me miserable

i also hold to a very similar vibe with she said "i love you 'till i don't" / i am just playing house, no idea what i'm doing now from sunshine riptide and also most of burna boy's verse, frankly. i fell in love but i didn't fall down and feel like i'm bulletproof, baby in particular

american beauty/american psycho, particularly the first verse. i think i fell in love again / maybe i just took too much cough medicine

golden is a big one for queer folks in general i've found. the chorus especially hits hard from an aro and/or ace reading. and i saw god cry in the reflection of my enemies / and all the lovers with no time for me

i've got a dark alley and a bad idea that says you should shut your mouth is a heavy song no matter how you slice it. but that chorus gets to me in particular: we can fake it for the airwaves / force our smiles, baby, half-dead / from comparing myself to everyone else around me

the kids aren't alright reads to me as one big anthem for platonic love above anything romantic, which resonates super hard with me. the second verse has a lot of good lines that i latch onto from an aroace lens too. your love is anemic and i can't believe / that you couldn't see it coming from me

pretty much the whole chorus of HOLD ME TIGHT OR DON'T does it for me, and those verses have got some good aroallo vibes too! i never really feel a thing... confidants but never friends...

the whole of fake out is a gimme. that chorus rings real true. starts with love is in the air, i just gotta find a window to break out and finishing with but it was all a fake-out

i've got all this ringing in my ears and none on my fingers is one that has another highly applicable title but the whole refrain of the truth hurts worse / than anything i could bring myself to do to you paired with the one-two punch of that second verse REALLY gets under my skin

and of course, the culminating one: you are what you love, not who loves you from save rock and roll. obviously there are a LOT of ways to read that line

there are a couple other songs i latch onto - wilson (expensive mistakes); a little less "sixteen candles", a little more "touch me"; the (after) life of the party to name a few - but the ones listed above are the big lyrics that resonate with me on a personal level

just in general i have a shitton of fob over on my aro playlist (which doubles as a general aroace/queer playlist but has a lot of emphasis on aromanticism) in case i forgot to mention anything but like i said those are the big ones

[promptthebear]

Kissmas Day 9

Prompt: Distracting kisses from someone that are meant to stop the other person from finishing their work, and give them kisses instead

Pairing: Sandor Clegane x Reader

CW: Female reader, lots and lots of swearing (It's Sandor c'mon now), reader is pregnant, some mentions of canon typical violence. If i forget anything please let me know!

A/N: Hello! This is a little different from the last few fics I wrote. I was going for like something cozy? So the pacing is a little slower and it's sort of a "not much happens but there's vibes" kind of fic. Hopefully you all enjoy it. I just really wanted to give my boy a story where he's safe, well fed, well rested, and doesn't have shit trying to kill him for like five minutes.

It was still dark when Sandor awoke, and colder than a wight’s arse. He could see the earliest light of dawn, though, through a nearby window. Pale yellow rays were starting to kiss the tops of the large, gloomy pines that encircled your cottage, and he knew it would be several hours yet before the sun would provide any proper warmth.

Grumbling and cursing under his breath, Sandor pushed back the furred hide that served as a blanket and swung his legs over the side of the bed. He hissed when his feet touched the floor, the chill so fierce it bit at his soles, even through the two layers of woolen socks he wore. Everyone, from great Kings to common fools, knew that Winters in the North were bitterly cold. But it was one thing to hear the tavern stories and another thing all together when you were trying to live through it.

He wondered, as he tugged on his boots, why he didn’t make for the Free Cities and Dorne like the few remaining knights did when the whole world finally fell apart in flame and ruin. Yes, the stories of the fine wines and glimmering cities where even beggars could be Kings might have been exaggerated, but it couldn’t be any worse than here. At the very least, it might be nice to live somewhere your piss didn’t freeze midstream and your cock didn’t stick to your hand each time you used the privy.

Sandor turned the idea over in his mind, finding that its appeal grew with each passing moment. However, any thoughts of leaving vanished the instant he glanced over his shoulder and caught sight of your face peeking out from under the edge of the blankets. Your expression was peaceful, almost serene.

He leaned over you, his hair falling around his cheeks like a curtain, and placed a quick kiss against your temple. You stirred slightly in response, your eyelashes fluttering as a soft moan escaped your lips.

“Whassamatter?”

Sandor chuckled and reached out to deliver a gentle pat to your side before answering.

“Nothing. Gonna go cut some firewood. I’ll be back before you’re up.”

You mumbled something in reply, too faint for him to make out, before sleep’s embrace claimed you once more. He chuckled again and fondly shook his head.

At one point, nobody wanted to spend a night in his bed, not even when he'd gone to a brothel. Those girls had been too frightened of his face to give him more than a few hours at most, leaving him to wake to a cold bed and empty purse the next morning.

You, on the other hand, were comforted enough by his presence to stay through the night. You even claimed you slept more soundly when he was with you. It had taken a while before Sandor believed you, but after over a year of waking with you warm and content beside him, he was starting to see that you’d been telling the truth.

The bedroom door squeaked as it opened, which made the large, shaggy dog the two of you kept leap to its feet and growl deep in its throat. Sandor shushed the animal, which immediately bounded over from its spot by the fireplace, tongue out and tail wagging at the sight of its master.

“Stupid mutt.” Sandor said, as he began to rumple and massage the dog’s ears. “Good thing you’re loyal, or else what use would you be?”

The dog, which you’d so cleverly called Nameless because Sandor had refused to give it one, eagerly leaned into his touch and gazed up at him in squinty eyed delight. You’d found the poor beast roughly around the same time Sandor had been able to walk again, where he’d been left to die in some abandoned crofter’s hut.

At first, Sandor had wanted nothing to do with the animal. As far as he was concerned, you didn’t need another mouth to feed, what with him still half crippled and you were only able to set the most basic of rabbit snares. There had barely been enough food for the two of you, let alone a walking gut disguised as a dog.

He’s a big, black dog you’d insisted on just like your crest. If that’s not a sign from the gods, I don’t know what is.

Bugger the gods had been Sandor’s reply, but in the end, he’d yielded, if only to have some peace from your griping. Since then, Nameless had followed Sandor around like a second shadow. He’d cursed the beast and the bitch that whelped him each time he got underfoot, but eventually this gave way to begrudging acceptance and finally a quiet sort of affection.

Whoever left Nameless behind had, whether they knew it or not, forfeited a skilled hunting dog. Despite his sweet nature with people, he could catch rabbits and squirrels as skillfully as any wolf, which kept you and Sandor well stocked with meat despite the North’s unforgiving climate.

Once again, Sandor found himself questioning why he’d chosen to live in the frozen arse end of the world as he tried to open the front door. A thick layer of ice had settled over the tiny cottage you called home, a parting gift from last night’s storm.

Despite ample shoving and force, the door was refusing to cooperate. With each attempt, the aged wood groaned and creaked as though in protest, but wouldn’t budge. Though he couldn’t see it, Sandor had a feeling the damn thing had frozen shut in its frame, which was a much more common occurrence than he would’ve liked it to be. With a muttered oath, he threw his shoulder against the wood, swearing louder at the shock of pain that came after.

A thin sweat had broken out on Sandor’s brow when he finally gave himself a moment to breathe, half slumped against the bastard door and wishing agonies upon whichever fool god made ice to begin with. He stole a glance over his shoulder, hoping the racket hadn’t woken you, and was greeted with the sight of Nameless. The dog was sitting a few feet behind him and watching the entire process as though it was a Mummer’s show Sandor was putting on especially for him.

“Are you just going to look? Or are you going to be helpful for once in your sorry life?”

By way of response, Nameless rose to his feet, stood for a moment, squinted at Sandor, and then let out a quick, loud sneeze that sent forth a spray of drool and dust motes into the chilled air. Satisfied, the dog sat down again with a bump, and stared at his master. He cocked his head to one side, and spread his mouth wide in a lolling, doggy grin, as if two of them were sharing some sort of secret joke.

Sandor couldn’t help but grin back, albeit a little lopsidedly, before returning to the problem of the door. Once upon a time, he could’ve split the bloody thing in two with the heel of his boot and a well-aimed kick, but he had been a different man then. The Hound, with all his strength and rage, had died with Gregor the day they both went over the falls. Now, all that remained was Sandor, who had to huff and puff and struggle with frozen doors just like anyone else.

When the door finally gave way, it did so with a mighty crack, which shattered the morning air in a flurry of loose snow that tumbled off the roof and bits of ice that shimmered like diamond shards as they fell.

Sandor stumbled outside, shoulder first since he was mid shove when the door decided to open. Instantly, he was blinded by the sheer, sterile whiteness of fresh snow and sunbeams that cut like yellow knives after the dimness of the cottage. For a moment, he had little choice but to wait and lean against the door frame while his vision cleared.

Despite the early hour, the woods were already awake and teeming with life. Around him, Sandor could hear all manner of birdsong, as well as the chattering of squirrels and the far off call of a solitary deer.

From behind the cottage came the sounds of the sheep, small, squat, shaggy creatures with more wool than brains between their ears. They bleated mournfully from inside their little shed, hoping it would get them fed all the sooner, but their cries stirred no pity in Sandor’s heart. He could hardly stand the sight of the fool things, with their empty eyes and the way they ran in panicked, useless circles every time they were frightened.

When you’d first asked Sandor why he hated the sheep so much, he told you it was because he had no patience for anything, man or beast, that was too stupid to know how stupid it actually was. You’d laughed at that, a bright, musical sound that made warmth bloom in Sandor’s chest, but you hadn’t left the matter alone like he’d hoped.

As far as you were concerned, there was no point in wasting time hating something so pathetic and harmless and so you persisted. If Sandor was stubborn, you were twice as much, pestering him with that unfaltering cheerfulness each time you went you to feed the damn things. Eventually, he relented, the name and reason tumbling from his lips like rain after a drought.

Mycha.

From the ashes of Sandor’s rage, shame had blossomed, and with it a thin, choking vine that clenched a little tighter around his heart each time he’d thought of the boy. He’d lived what felt like a thousand different lifetimes since that fateful day by the river, and no matter how much he’d drunk, fought or fucked, he couldn’t seem to shake that one particular ghost. It was as though a small part of Mycha had always been there, slowly poisoning what little shreds of goodness Sandor had managed to grasp hold of, and for a while, he supposed that was what he deserved. Until you came along.

You, who had dragged Sandor out from the water when he was little more than a half drowned corpse. You, who had set every broken bone, stitched every wound and fed him spoonfuls of broth even when he’d cursed you after each one. With your constant, stubborn, infuriating cheerfulness, you had talked Sandor into talking, smiled him into smiling, and somehow loved him into loving you back. You had become the sun that rose and set on each day of Sandor’s life. You were what got him up in the mornings and kept him working until dusk. The thought of losing you, or worse, having you cast him aside, scared him more than dragons, others, and his cunt brother ever had.

That was why, in the end, Sandor had chosen to tell you the truth. At least then you’d hear it from him, instead of whatever exaggerated horseshit the village gossips would invent. Ugly as it was, Sandor knew honesty would be his friend in this matter, and he’d had more than his fill of liars after spending so much time in service to the Lannisters.

And so you came to know the whole sordid tale, one dreary morning in the sheep shed. He spared no detail, no matter how gruesome it was or how poorly it reflected on his character. If you were going to keep loving him, it was best you knew the sort of man you’d chosen, lest the truth curdle what little affection he’d earned.

At first, Sandor wasn’t sure how you were going to take things. He half expected you to try to brain him with the bucket of sheep’s feed, then drive him off in a hail of shrieking and chunks of dung. Tears were also a likely possibility, though you didn’t really seem the type. But learning that the man who you’d let into your home and bed had the blood of an innocent child on his hands could make anyone behave strangely.

When he’d finally got up the courage to stop staring at his boots and look into your face, you, as always, surprised him. You were smiling at him, that same warm, gentle smile that Sandor remembered from the moment he’d woken up in your arms.

I know is what you’d said. I’ve always known, and I love you anyway.

You’d reached for him after, setting aside your bucket so you could bring your hand up and caress his scarred cheek. Sandor had leaned into your touch, like it was the only thing keeping him from breaking apart into a million pieces. Of course you’d known, who in all the Seven Kingdoms hadn’t heard the stories about King Joffery’s rabid dog and the things he’d done? He should’ve given you more credit.

From there, it had been easy enough to tell you why he hated those sheep. Their cries, the sheer terror in their eyes each time he approached? They reminded him too much of that boy, and regardless of how you felt about it, he was not entirely certain he’d ever be able to forget. It was one thing to have your forgiveness and another thing entirely to be able to forgive himself.

Give it time is what you’d told him And let me worry about the sheep. You’ve got enough to do around here, anyway.

The sound of Nameless’ barking is what suddenly tugged Sandor from his memories and back into the here and now. Somehow, the dog had managed to squeeze past him without Sandor noticing, and he was now diving face first through the fresh snow, on the hunt for grouse tracks and anything else that would provide a decent chase.

Sandor watched for a moment, unable to hide the smile playing about his lips. The sight of the big dog, now sporting a healthy dusting of snow across his shoulders and muzzle, was enough to brighten anyone’s mood. He supposed, after almost starving to death on his own, the idiot creature was simply happy to be alive long enough to see another day.

The two of them would go and check Sandor’s traps later. With any luck, they’d snag a rabbit or two that you could roast for supper and have plenty of bones left for Nameless to enjoy. But, in the meantime, you wouldn’t be cooking anything if there wasn’t any wood for the fire.

It hadn’t warmed up any by the time Sandor walked to the woodshed. The snows frozen crust crunched under his feet as he walked, while his breath floated away in thick, white clouds that dampened his beard. His axe, stuck blade down in the stump a few feet away from the woodshed, was a welcome sight.

It was by no means half the weapon his greatsword had been, but Sandor found comfort in the way its worn, wooden handle fit snugly into his grasp and in its blade that thirsted for pine sap instead of blood.

Before long, the sound of logs splitting filled the air, mingling with the soft creak of trees in the wind and an occasional bark from Nameless. Sandor quickly found his rhythm, letting the weight of the axe guide his arm on the downstroke and pushing aside each long with his other hand to be stacked in the shed later.

He went on like that for a while, cut, push, another log, and do it again. The repetition of the work was soothing, almost meditative. It brought a sense of peace to Sandor the way only busy hands could.

Cut, push, new log, do it again.

It was like the axe was an extension of his arm, with the beat of his heart matching each thud of the blade and his breath moving in time as the axe swung through the air. There was most likely going to be a fresh tree fall after last night’s winds, no doubt with plenty of new wood for Sandor to haul home. It probably wouldn’t hurt to bring a length of rope and the sledge when he went hunting with Nameless later. If they didn’t catch anything, at least they wouldn’t be coming home empty-handed.

The young pine he was currently working on was halfway gone by the time you’d made an appearance. Sandor hadn’t heard you at first, too absorbed in what he was doing. It was only after you’d said his name for the third time that he’d finally stopped and turned to look at you over his shoulder, squinting at you as though he wasn’t quite sure who you were or where he was.

“What are you doing out here?”

His tone, like everything about him, was gruff. You smiled at him all the same, knowing that for Sandor, gruffness and worry were often interchangeable.

“Came to check on you. You’ve been out here for hours.”

Sandor glanced upwards and was surprised to find the sun sitting squarely above his head. A sheen of sweat had also broken out over his arms and forehead, and he could feel where it was pooling in the hollows of his back. With a sigh, he set aside his axe and removed his heavy woolen cloak, before turning back towards you.

“Have you been asleep this whole time?”

The slight tilt of his chin in your direction indicated your odd choice of garments. Born to a wilding father and shepherd’s daughter, you always swore the North in your blood kept you from ever truly feeling cold. Still, a sleeping shift, boots, and knit shawl tossed hastily about your shoulders was a questionable choice in midwinter, even for a Northern girl.

You shook your head and gestured back towards the cottage where steam had fogged up the windows.

“I started the laundry, wanted to make use of the sunlight while we still have it. I figured it didn’t make much sense to change until my other clothes were dry, and then I could wash these next.”

Sandor listened to your explanation, his face unchanging save for an arched brow. When you finished, he raised his arm and pointed back at the cottage with a thick finger.

“You should be inside, you fool, woman. You’ll freeze your tits off out here.”

You laughed before wrapping your shawl a little tighter around your shoulders and closing the space between you and Sandor with a few steps.

“If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a thousand times. I’m a Northerner. I don’t get cold. We’re not as pampered as you Southern city types.”

Sandor grumbled softly and shook his head, something about “tongue lashing harpy bitch.” There was no venom behind his words, however, only affectionate resignation. Instinctively, he brought his hand to rest on the curve of your stomach, a protective gesture towards the child you’d been carrying for the last five months. You reached up for Sandor’s face, cupping the scarred side as you usually did against the palm of your hand.

Sandor’s eyes fluttered shut in response to the touch, and for a moment, years seemed to fall away from his expression. He turned his head slightly to the side and pressed a kiss against the skin of your wrist. You loved seeing him like this, vulnerable and content. It was like a glimpse into the past, when he was young and full of hope. However, his eyes opened all too quickly, and he was back to being the Sandor you knew. Older, grumpy, and entirely done with your nonsense.

“Inside. Or I’ll sling you over my shoulder like a sack of potatoes and bring you there myself”

You rolled your eyes, knowing he’d do no such thing, not while you were pregnant, anyway.

“Fine. But I want a kiss first.”

There was more grumbling, but Sandor did as you asked, catching your mouth against his while his hands snaked down to encircle your hips. You leaned into the kiss, pressing your body as close to his as you could get while still keeping your feet on the ground. His beard was coarse against your cheeks, and he smelled faintly of the woods and sweat. The heat of him seemed to envelope you, like a familiar blanket.

You stood like that for a while, the two of you bathed in morning sunshine and kissing as though you’d never get a chance to do it again. When Sandor tried to pull away, you chased him, closing the space between your mouths by wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling him downwards. This kiss was a little messier and rougher than the first, most likely due to Sandor’s surprise, but you didn’t mind. It was only when you nibbled at his bottom lip that he broke the kiss off in earnest, catching your two hands in one of his and trapping them against his chest.

“None of that. I told you, go inside.”

You stared up at Sandor and pulled your mouth into an exaggerated pout.

“One more? Please? And then I’ll go, I promise.”

Sandor swore softly under his breath and used his free hand to adjust the front of his trousers before leaning down to claim your mouth again. For a moment, it seemed as though you were going to get your way. Sandor had brought his other hand up to twine in your hair, which only served to deepen the kiss. You welcomed it eagerly, opening your lips and running your tongue against the seam of his mouth. He let out a groan in response, the hand that still held yours squeezing tight. You squirmed against him eagerly, trying to wrap one of your legs around his and haul yourself upwards, your hips seeking the friction they so desperately craved.

This, however, didn’t have the desired effect. Sandor began to laugh, and then placed his hands on your shoulders, gently pushing you back so you could no longer reclaim his mouth.

“I’m not a tree, you little minx, so stop trying to climb me. You said one more, you’ve had one more, and now you’re going to go inside or else.”

One look at Sandor’s face, and you knew there was no use in pushing your luck. With a long, suffering sigh, you stepped away, already mourning the absence of his mouth and hands on your body.

“Fine. But I better see you again before it gets dark. I’ll need to wash those clothes you’re wearing, and I’m not warming up your dinner twice.”

Sandor grunted, the noise vaguely affirmative enough that you took it as agreement. You turned to head back towards the cottage, only to stop mid step when you felt the familiar sting of an open hand strike your ass. You spun back around, your shawl spinning about your shoulders, and stared at Sandor, who grinned wolfishly back.

“That’s not fair!” you sputtered, your already pink cheeks flushing deeper.

“Nothing ever is,” came the reply.

You shook your head, turning once again to leave. Sandor let you do so without further torment, watching the way the sunlight made your hair glisten and the subtle swing of your hips as you walked. Nothing was ever fair, but sometimes things got close, even for an old dog like himself.

[caligvlasaqvarivm]

Do you feel comfortable with us recommending your blog to others or...?

Because there are blogs dedicated to analyzing homestuck and they are usually very good but the moment they talk about Eridan all the magic disappears and, I just want to know if it is acceptable to recommend you as like, homework i guess (?).

In the style of, if they are going to talk about complex characters then they should do their due research.

It's okay if you're not comfortable with the idea, maybe I shouldn't be that interested either, it just hurts to know that they can do better, and they are not (on the contrary, its just worse).

Unfortunately, not with that attitude!

I actually have a pretty strict rule to never go out into the fandom in search of fights, and to never answer asks asking me what I think about another fandom member's interpretation of canon ("official"/semi-official works like PQ are exempt). This is because, if I go onto some other guy's blog with zero intention to change my opinion, and say "you're wrong," that makes ME the asshole.

Nobody likes it when someone rocks up to the discussion to tell them they're wrong and try to own them with facts and logic. It's actually kind of a dick thing to do! That's why I contain my takes to my own blog, which, thanks to the block button and blacklists, means that nobody has to engage with me if they don't actively want to.

I've had several instances on this blog before of either having to dismount a conversation where neither side will change their mind with "agree to disagree," told people I can't/won't comment on something because I don't engage with the fandom overall, or straight-up blocked people. I do this because I've made the mistake before of trying to be Correct on the Internet, and the truth is it's an unwinnable battle that makes everybody involved look like a clown. At the end of the day, we're all squabbling about what a webcomic "means," and it's impossible to be 100% correct. God knows I've been wrong, sneakily edited posts, and hoped nobody noticed (if you did, thanks for not saying anything).

If you like my posts and agree with my opinions - great! I wouldn't be doing this if I didn't like the ego boost. If you don't, I'm usually willing to hear people out, but I'm pretty egotistical and we'll most likely agree to disagree. I pretty exclusively reserve actual retaliation for people who rock up (especially while hiding behind anon) pretty much just to tell me I'm wrong. Like I said, the person who does that is an asshole! I try not to be that asshole.

If someone's takes are so "bad" to you that you can't stand seeing them, you have the power to banish that person from ever appearing before you again. Block they ass. You literally don't need a reason. But if you want to do the hard, thankless, joyless, unrewarding, and nearly always futile task of changing someone's opinion, then step one is to take a deep breath and trying not to think about it in terms of enemies and allies, right and wrong. This person is another human, just trying to make a living on this shitty earth, talking about this thing you both like. The vibe should be excitement that you can share an insight they haven't considered, not a tribal monkey instinct to hit another monkey with a big bone club.

If these blogs already do a lot of Homestuck analyzing, chances are, they're receptive to Homestuck. Instead of using me (some rando on the internet) as a source, you should use the comic itself. Lucky for you that I cite my sources, or at least make it easy to look up the parts of the comic I'm talking about. It's a little more legwork than just linking an essay, but you're trying to perform the nearly impossible task of changing someone's mind, so put some elbow grease into it.

And if that doesn't work, welp. Agree to disagree! Haha.

[torchstelechos]

just saw you saying you want to talk about The Characters (isat) what are some thoughts you got bip bap boppin around in the noggin about the Them

Ooooooooohhhh Anon,,,, Ooooooh, You have unlocked deep thoughts and long monologues.... have this piece of bullshit that I spat out in excitement

Isabeau: 

Ah yes, dear Isabeau, my most beloathed <3 (self recognition in other /derogatory). He’s one of the characters I’ve written the most meta for that's actually about his character in the game. I love him and hate him in equal measures but that's not what I want to talk about today! I want to discuss his morbid humor and fascination, I suppose. Also his rather interesting character type and how that's displayed in the game, specifically through his morbid thoughts and discussion choices. 

In the game we see plenty of times that Isabeau uses morbid word choices (killed them so that I could live friendquest quote) and brings up morbid discussion topics (what do we do if you die? What do we do if Bonnie dies?) that the others find disquieting. He also laughs at Siffrin’s time traveler joke, finds scary Siffrin attractive, and finds being paid attention too enough that they can harm you attractive. This brings me to my main point, which is that Isabeau is the cold scientist archetype character that tries to be the himbo fighter character. Of course we know that hes trying to hide himself behind the himbo character type, but the fact that he's analytic to a fault, morbid in almost every way, finds scary things attractive, and calls Changing killing his past self… this man is very much a scientist that was about to turn evil but decided friendship was the answer whose character was subverted into himbo fighter because those who are dumb are more liked than those who know things. It's interesting, and I think it’s one of the reasons I despise Isabeau POV fanfics. Most fanfics feel almost like his facade is him, and thats just not true and it bugs me so very much to read fanfics with his POV now. But! This isnt to say those fanfics aren’t well done! They are, I just find them lacking in canon Isabeau’s almost neutral analytical personality that was then filtered through therapy and self help books esque vibe. Fascinating character, hate him dearly for it though. 

Misc thoughts: 

I generally have a hard time nailing down everything I feel about him for a variety of reasons but I do want to say that I think he finds Siffrin’s big melt down appearance attractive after the whole thing blows over. I also think he doesn't have the best track record for what is okay to say or not? So he falls back on “I am dumb therefore I can say things that others find disturbing and frame it as something I just don't understand or misunderstood :)” which kind of backfires on him constantly because now no one really takes him seriously? I don’t know, I just find most smart characters have a hard time figuring out the social situation of certain things so they tend to either not care at all for tact or overthink everything and over compensate by not allowing themself to go for certain things. In this instance its him not being able to confess because he thinks he's bad for liking someone in a certain way and doesn't want to pressure them which backfires because he's otherwise a good communicator but failed hard with Siffrin. Speaking of, I don’t think hes ever gotten with anyone other than Siffrin. It took the world literally almost ending and a time looping induced trauma attack for him to confess he liked Siffrin, this man does NOT have game. So, lol, that kiss? Probably his first <3, RIP my man did not deserve that

Odile:

Strangely enough I don’t believe I have ever written a meta post for Odile? Or anything about her other than tags? So yeah, let's focus on her. She's a very honesty based character in a game literally about someone not being able to speak the truth, which is why I appreciate the sus route so much. She noticed something was wrong and went for it, leading her down rabbit holes best left untouched. Odile is a character that I truly think would have accidentally unleashed an eldritch horror on the quest if not for Isabeau stopping her. Mainly because she is smart but not academic smart, she's learned from her travels plenty of things that lend to real life experience but she's not much of an academic when it comes to how to get answers she wants (taking until the very last town to get a familytale while Siffrin took maybe three loops to do is. Certainly something!). Its fascinating, because if I were to actually describe her personality and how that lends to a character archetype I would say that she's a brawler character. Effectively, she and Isabeau are reflections of each other in a very specific way and I think about this often in her relation to the group. Its almost laughable how shes been put into this responsibility role of the group while Isabeau is off goofing around (and secretly plotting how to best respect his friends remains), shes not very good at knowing what is the best course of action and acts out in impulsive ways that harms others (Looking at you, hitting Trauma Big Siffrin moment) and that doesn’t… make her a good leader per say? I just find it funny, how others write her as someone who would go out of her way to research Siffrin’s home country and succeed when she barely succeeded in her own knowledge hunt. If anything, it would be Isabeau who would find the information and inform Odile rather than the other way round. I dunno, I just don’t think anyone is really considering the fact that she probably hasn’t set foot into a higher academic institution just based on her research skills. 

Misc thoughts: 

I’ve only seen one fanfic acknowledge the fact that Odile hit Siffrin? And did so in such a way that it hurt badly. I wouldn’t be surprised if it left a scar (which that little freak probably adores because he knows that it means he wont forget Odile ever again), alongside the others they gave themself. Speaking of said hurting, I don’t think it's really acknowledged how much Odile puts down Siffrin? Yes it's usually just a teasing moment here or there, but have yall thought of the fact that she compared Siffrin to an animal and has hit him? I think about this so much. I think about it when I'm trying to fall asleep sometimes. She did that to him, and he *remembers it,* he acknowledges it during act 5, he has that ingrained into his *soul.* I think people should write about it more, or at least acknowledge that Siffrin probably… doesn’t want to talk to Odile about feelings or be touched by her for a while? Honestly, if I was Siffrin’s position during the failed friendquest moments? I would have said worse. I would have done worse. Because can you imagine? Imagine with me, you just remembered that your country is gone, everyone you love either doesnt remember you or is dead, the only person who could possibly tell you anything is the man you must kill, and your family member is talking about how hard it is to be in the country her mother is from and not feel a connection to it. That you are both more than your heritage. I would start biting, kicking, fighting, hell I would probably find out what she looks like without her bun! I would be pissed. But yaknow, Siffrin is a nice fella and kind of only waited to go off the deep end when they were sure they wouldn’t be able to escape. Anyway, I think of Odile sometimes and get violently ill by the knowledge she no longer holds that would explain some of Siffrin’s reactions and word choices to her cause no matter what? She can’t take it back. She never even said it. It’s not even real anymore. God I love this game, it makes me feel sick.

Mirabelle: 

Big ol’ sigh, yeah the-bitter-ocean if your out there I think about your tags on my Mira post a lot. The fandom doesn’t really get her do they? Most of the time I see people write her off as not very understanding or oblivious to other people’s feelings, which fair for romance (she didnt notice the very glowing sign of what I believe to be a ginger blushing but yaknow I understand as aro) but shes very good at knowing when someone isn’t feeling well? She has several unique dialogue options after Siffrin gets up from the field after looping which Odile does not have (despite EVERYONE ACKNOWLEDGING THEY’RE NOT OKAY), and asks after their wellbeing despite being in a constant anxiety attack and morality stress issues induced panic attack in the house. The only real big character flaw is a very typical shonen main character flaw which is that she is too trusting to a degree that it let Siffrin get away with almost destroying the world, Bonnie dying, and the others stepping all over her own feelings (not that any of these are her fault, but she did contribute to the lack of communication which lead to the loops. I love her, I do, but EVERYONE had a hand in Siffrin getting stuck in the loops). Her trust is also what led to the big fallout and slap she gives Siffrin during act 5, she was already giving her heart to him and the others and was constantly checking in during the adventure to make sure everyone was happy and okay with what was happening so the sudden switch from her POV is a huge betrayal of her trust in them. This is basically someone you were already on edge about hating you suddenly deciding that yes, they do hate you and everything you stand for because *they know.* No matter what you think about the situation, Mirabelle’s trust (her biggest character flaw) was thrown back into her face after she thought they were okay with her (not even a few weeks ago they said that this was the happiest they have ever been and she *remembers this fully and utterly*) and broke her heart with all her insecurities. It’s a very hopeless situation when you don’t have context, which means I don’t really blame her for slapping Siffrin, I just wish that it didn’t happen because as a Player I know the full context. Betrayal of trust… its a funny thing in this game, because it wasn’t a betrayal specifically from one POV but from the other it was. Fascinating! I despise it, I love it, it makes me sick. 

Misc Thoughts: 

Oooooh Mira we are in it now, This endgame of yours has left you with insecurities and trauma you didn’t think possible. I love her, I do, which is why I also have a great idea for a fanfic that involves her getting some VERY bad coping mechanisms <3 teehee. Careful what you wish for darling! Things go bad if you don’t take care of what you love. Anyway, I don’t think it’s weird to have Mira in outfits that are contrasting too heavily from her personality in the game? I dont know how to say this, but I think it’s a tad strange that I’ve seen roleswap aus/personality swap aus where Mirabelle is different via aesthetic? Because thats her whole religion? Sure she doesnt want to change but I don’t think she minds much clothing or aesthetic wise? In fact i think she considers that the safest option? So I dunno, I think people should dress her in goth and emo outfits more. Also I do think its a tad silly people don’t focus too much on her journey trauma and rather focus on her romance trauma, yall know that was just a distraction and not her main issues, right? Like yall know this game isnt romance the simulator, right???? RIGHT???? God Mira, you would hate that the fandom boils you down to your AceAroness, I just fucking know it. 

Bonnie: 

Who let this sassy small child into this story???? God, dearest Bonnie, the literal best party member Imo. I love them dearly, they are one of the meanest fucking assholes in the game I adore them. Yall think about the longstanding issues Siffrin has with touch and reaching out and how the rotten adults route fucking annihilates them into smithereens lol. I think about the fact that Bonnie has harmed Siffrin soooo much in the loops, it leaves me breathless because this small child has killed Siffrin twice, slapped their hands away when they tried to help them (for the first time in Bonnies POV!! Thats huge!!), and yelled at them multiple times about how awful they are. I do wonder what would have happened if the rotten adults route continued without looping? Who would have spoken up and who would have had to realize that something is WRONG with Siffrin in that moment? Would Bonnie backpedal when they realize? What was Siffrin’s facial expression right then? What happened? I just. God. Fuck. No one talks about this AT ALL in the fandom and it drives me insane. Despite everything, despite what was erased, what was unmade, the effects stayed and will continue to harm Siffrin. Do yall think about the idea that Siffrin probably doesnt reach out until Bonnie does post loops? I think about this so much, Bonnie has harmed Siffrin so many times it would kill them if they ever found out, and I desperately need them to find out. I also kind of,, just assumed that Bonnie would be keeping a keen eye on Siffrin’s eating and remind them to eat and drink water (even if I dont think Siffrin needs that) after the loops because its an easy way to help and have some control over situations? I dunno, I think Bonnie is a very complicated kid who has harmed and been harmed and no one will ever know just how much has been done and undone. 

Misc Thoughts: 

I still think Bonnie should be able to make and throw bombs post bomb memory. I just NEED Bonnie to throw a molotov at the King, fuck, it would be so funny. Also as a side note, I do think growing up Bonnie has to deal with a lot of untreated Trauma and probably reacts very similar to Siffrin before someone comments on the fact that they are just like him and suddenly they start going to a therapist about it, I do not think they would take it as a compliment for even one instance. They would get sick so fast and go, me and them? Similar? No. I have to go to get a doctor. I cannot be a Frin Jr. the world could not handle it. And suddenly they have the second best mental health of the group (first goes to Isabeau because Isabeau was already in therapy before the game, I just fucking know it <3) which makes everyone fucking jealous as hell because seriously? The Kid??? Damnit. But yeah I do think the fastest way anyone could get Bonnie to accept help is to compare them to Siffrin because they do have a Recognition of Self in the Other (derogatory) thing going on with Siffrin in the game, which is probably worse by the fact that they grew up with him as a role model. Everyone that knows them is like, oh my change your so lucky! The saviors are your family that must be so cool <3, and Bonnie is like. They make me to go to bed on time and force me to eat veggies what the fuck are you saying. Anyway yeah I love Bonnie so much, the meanest fucking kid in the game <3. 

Siffrin: 

Aaauuuggghhhhh, the one everyone is waiting for, the Siff of the Frin. Love this fucking idiot, but yeah lets talk touch and how the family has hurt them over the loops <3. Okay so straight out the gate, Bad touch! Isabeau pushing them away after they kiss him, which is very understandable because yaknow Isabeau could tell that was a desperation kiss and is not okay for either of them but! Holy shit! Siffrin, my dear friend that was probably the worst thing you could have done, but yeah that did leave its marks deeply in them so I will mark that down as harmed. Then we get the bad friendquests, which yeah Isabeau hitting them with the “I thought you were also trying” hurts more than I can physically say, but we’ll mark that down as two. Then Odile hits them, grabs their collar, sus quest bullshit, and general disdain for Siffrin lying about the stars we’ll mark down as four more which leads to six. Mirabelle slapping Siffrin and letting him get away with lying about his health we’ll put at 8. Bonnie pushing him into a tear, pineapple, slapping hands away, and yelling at them multiple times we’ll put at 12. Then there's the “like taming a wild animal” teasing which Ill put at 13, all of which is just off the top of my brain and I know there's more moments that hurt Siffrin deeply. Yaknow, looking at this, typing this, it seems a tad silly but. How else could I describe the never ending pain at knowing that most of these wont be acknowledged as bad for Siffrin as it was bad for the others? I dunno, I think about Siffrin giving everything up for the party and no one knowing exactly what they did because how could they? It’s gone. It’s not real anymore, not until Siffrin says it. I just. I dont know where I’m going with this but Siffrin as a character hurts me deeply, and I think it’s because no matter what happens Siffrin refuses to acknowledge when the others hurt him back. Just. Keeping the cycle going because they dont know how to break it, and they never have until they break first. I just think of this a lot. Him being stuck, in circles over and over. 

Misc Thoughts: 

I wanna chew him up and spit him out like a dog toy. No further comments (see my blog for further comments). ((I need to see a Self inflicted Achromatic animatic, pls, fuck plsssss))

LOOP: 

Loop time!! Loop time! I am physically ill because of this beast. You all know that one fanart where it says “You Won!” and Loop is dry heaving? Thats me at literally any moment when I think about Loop. 

I am a little shy to admit though that I didn’t catch their facade at first, mainly because I’m not very good at catching things like that at first? If a person acts a certain way, thats how they act! So Yeah, ya boy was confused by two hats lol. But afterwards I did do a bit of thinking and as I mentioned in a previous post i do think Loop is pretending/acting like how they remembered Siffrin acted like before the loops. Mira mentions that Siffrin is mean in teasing, enough so that it might have hurt if she didnt know that it was friendly teasing. Isabeau has a great monologue about his feelings on Siffrin before the loops, and Siffrin themself acknowledges some of their less than savory traits before the loops during the loops as well. This is to say, Loop is a fucking prick that tries to be floating and teasing in their comments while hitting where it hurts in just the right way that they can pretend that they mean something else. I genuinely think thats how Loop remembers themself before they were Loop, even if they got some things VERY WRONG. Of course, by the time they realize this it’s too late and that’s their personality now, which is kind of fucked up when you realize how much of their personality is them acting out a half remembered person who died many many many loops ago. But alas, such is the way of Loop. 

Also if we think about Loop in comparison to Siffrin. Well. We get an interesting picture. But the thought makes me too ill to continue. But I will say loving someone so much you destroy yourself for them… I don't think anyone in the family would be happy about that really. Theres a difference between destroying yourself and destroying the world… I wonder why that is for them, what made the difference between self and the world. A fool, and the world. Hmm. Interesting. Anyway, Loop’s facade gets me everytime and I want to use them as a stuffed animal. 

Misc Thoughts: 

Yeah that STAR CAN NOT EAT OR DRINK, lol get rekted they cant even fucking get drunk. Now for some HCs, I do think that Loop would wear a promise ring, even if no one in this Vaugarde understands what that means. I just. Think that Loop wouldn’t be able to let go of Their Fighter. Hahaha! I don’t really wanna go further into detail about this rn but I AM THINKING… Loop is one of the saddest characters I have ever fucking had the audacity to love. No I will not take comments on this further lol. (Me loving Loop and Siffrin while disliking Isabeau? Call me an Isabeau Kinnie at the rate lol)

[wh0refornikolailantsov]

Diminishing Returns - Kaz Brekker

Content Warnings: Canon Compliant Threat And Violence. Dangerous Attempts At Self Sacrifice. Explicit Language. Barrel Canon Compliant Trauma. Assassination Attempts. Poisoning. Angsty Vibes. Not Beta/Proof Read. Not My Best Writing.

Maybe I can write something not angsty after this one. Maybe.

Alkemi!Grisha!Reader.

"Someone wants you dead Brekker," you say, tracing the spider webs the bullets made in his glass window.

"What's new?" He asks. Kaz does not need help, or at least that's the illusion he has created for himself, the man is forever a skilful scalpel, cutting those precise lines so directed and meticulous that you don't always know he is doing it. You... you consider yourself more of an axe, or a fine cleaver, there's no subtlety to what you do, but it's definite, it's permanent. It's efficient.

"You need me," you start and the scowl you receive nearly shuts you up, but you don't let it, "stop that Brekker, you are not a one man army."

"I do not need you, I don't need-"

"Do not finish that sentence," you warn him.

Kaz doesn't know how to get you to leave, both lies and honestly he can only see ending poorly. If he tells you that he does not need your help, that you have nothing of value to offer, if he lies you will stay, and you will fight to protect him out of spite. If he tells the truth, if some how he can pull from the dark depths of his soul some shred of honesty to actually admit he is scared for you, that he does not want you hurt because of him, then you still stay because he gave you a reason.

"You are not playing this game with me Brekker," you tell him. "You don't get to play the you don't need me card. I am the best thing The Dregs never had, and you can use me, even if you don't need me."

Kaz moves the drink he has been not drinking across the surface on the table. It draws you attention, the fizzing, the frosted glass, the way it has been sitting there between the two of you this whole time. So glaringly obvious. So glaringly untouched. You pick it up and before Kaz can say anything, before he can show his hand you've already downed the drink.

"Someone tried to poison you," you tell him. He blinks, barely able to process what has happened.

"And now they've poisoned you," Kaz says, his hand curled in a gloved fist, that desperate reminder that he cannot reach for you. "You knew it was poisoned."

You falter slightly, and slip into a nearby seat. "Yeah, well, I suspected," you admit.

"And you drank it," Kaz says.

"It felt like a better point to make at the time," you smile. You can feel the poison rattling around in your body. You focus on it, knowing that when it comes down to it, poison is just complex compounds, and if you know enough about them, enough about chemicals within the body and toxins and poisons, you can make a balance out of nearly anything.

"You've-," Kaz cuts himself off, not willing to say the words. You give him a smirk. Did he really not know? Even after all this time? You were sure he had to have figured it out by now. You were certain of it. But the way he watches you, that look in those shark eyes of his, he thinks you're dying. You are, but you can fix that. "You're dying."

"Fixable," you say, focusing on your internal balances, the chemicals, the poison, focusing on breaking it down.

"You are sitting..." he pauses, and the flicker of disappointment on his face telling you exactly the moment it hits him. "Alkemi."

"Ding ding," you chuckle, filtering the poison through your system, breaking it down until it is no longer lethal, until it is barely even a nuisance. "Did you think the title I took was just aesthetical?"

"Monarch," he says. "As in the butterfly?"

"I'd be better of having this conversation with Wylan," you admit, knowing the feeling in your legs is about to return.

"The Monarch concentrates the toxins in its own body, consuming the toxin and converting it," Kaz says, and he notices your smile.

"More than a pretty face," you mumble. He gives you a scowl. You sit up straight and lean forward, resting your elbows on your knees. "Now we have all the pettiness out of the way are you going to let me help?"

"No," he says, "all you did is prove your foolishness," Kaz snaps, and you feel the anger but cannot tell where it is coming from, it seems to have spiked out of nowhere. You cannot figure why it is he is mad at you. "You are leaving."

"I am not... leaving," you say slowly, "and honestly? Fuck you for thinking I would."

"You don't owe me anything, and I am not asking-,"

"Brekker, we are friends, aren't we? That is what friends do-"

"No, we aren't friends, we have never been friends."

You stare at him, you know he is trying to get under your skin, trying to make you mad, upset, trying to make you leave. But you hate that it is working. "So what is this?" You ask. "A partnership?"

"An unwanted visit," Kaz says through tight lips. Too many missteps, too many people he never meant to care about, too much weakness. He cannot add you to the list, he cannot make you another chess piece, another casualty, another name in carved stone. Even if you seem half determined to jump right into the grave. "A low interest bet."

"You're being intentionally cruel Brekker, and I care not for it," you tell him.

"Then leave," he says. You want to dig in your heels, the more he protests, the move he pushes at you, you know he needs you, he is afraid to need you. You don't blame him. To need people is dangerous. Especially if you're like Brekker. Closed off. Caught in the cycle of revenge and wrath. But you can only fight him for so long.

"No," you say.

"I don't want you here," he states.

"Am I supposed to believe that, or to care?"

"Why are you trying to get yourself killed?" he asks. "There are simpler ways."

"But this way ruffles your feathers king of the crows," you say, keeping your lips as straight as you can, not breaking eye contact. He wants you to turn around, he wants you to walk out and leave and never see him again. He wants you to make it easier for him. But you won't do it. You won't. You know him better than he wants you to, which means you know him too well for that.

He looks at you, knowing you should run, knowing you should know better. Knowing that a reasonable person should have walked away from him by now, because they'd know they deserve better, they deserve to be treated with honesty and compassion. But you don't know better, or rather you do and are ignoring it anyway.

"Someone wants you dead Brekker," you state, "and I am not going anywhere while you're in danger."

[dontbelasagnax]

First, I love your art and your fics so much! Second, you seem like someone who has very good Codywan headcanons, and I’d love to hear some of them if you have any you’d like to share 🙂 (No pressure at all though!)

Tysm anon!!! I don't know what kind of headcanons you're looking for but I have soooo many always haha! They live in the nebulous realm of headcanons in which they are applied to every iteration of codywan unless they are not--for no reason other than vibes. All sfw but I always have thots (very intentional spelling) if anyone would like to hear about the nsfw things.

- Cody has spreadsheets for everything. It calms and organizes his mind. Helps him visualize and put the chaos to rights. When Obi-Wan notices Cody getting antsy and agitated, he gently asks him if he's made a spreadsheet recently. If that doesn't solve things, he'll offer to look over the charts together. If that doesn't solve the issue, he'll pull Cody into his lap, tenderly kiss any available real estate that needs kissing, and twirl fingers through his head of curls and massage away the tension. For all that Cody hates when his hair gets messed up, he does love being pet like a cat.

(the rest is going under the cut because I'm rather verbose)

- SPEAKING OF CATS! Cody is a cat person. This is nothing new, I just wholeheartedly know it to be true. It's only because he wants a cat so badly that he acts like he doesn't care for them. Obi-Wan sees through the facade. He saw how Cody looked at the stray tooka they rescued from the rubble one somber evening. How he cradled the lump of fluff and ran his thumb back between ears as if the lightest of touches would hurt the poor dear. How palpable was the anguish in his eyes after handing off the tooka to the surviving locals of the city. Even after he said, "Glad that's over with. Would hate to get cat hair on my blacks." Obi-Wan knows. So the next time he's on Coruscant, he buys a little orange plush tooka. It's tiny, only just bigger than his hand, but perfect. He ties a piece of flimsi reading '- OWK' to its neck with a ribbon and tucks it under the covers of Cody's bed so its head and front paws peek out. Perhaps he's a coward, perhaps he's just being gracious in letting Cody have some privacy in receiving his gift. What he does know is the next time he feels Cody staring long at the side of his face, he looks back and Cody blushes and smiles ever so slightly- shy. Oh, Obi-Wan loves him.

- Obi-Wan doesn't hate caf. It's simply not his favorite. When he does drink it, he likes it black. There could be many reasons for this but Cody thinks it's a superiority complex thing. Cody likes his caf with cream and two packets of sweetener. Sure, he'll drink any caf shoved his way, but what he truly enjoys? Yeah, it's not the shit coming straight from the dark depths of a Sith Lord's ass crack.

- Cody likes when Obi-Wan drives. Could be a ship, speeder--any mode of transport, really. It's not a secret that Obi-Wan does not like driving. With how calm and steady he remains at the wheel, there is tension in his jaw, bitten into his cheek, and clenched white into his knuckles. It stresses him out. But he is good at it. And he makes Cody feel safe. Cody doesn't get to feel safe a whole lot in the midst of war.

- Cody will never tell a living soul this (except maybe when he gets so sloshed he can't remember his name or all the reasons why he really should not lay out his honest bleeding truths) but his favorite color is not 212th gold. Yes, 212th gold is Cody's color. It's his. But blue is what he finds most aesthetically beautiful. It's the color of a certain Jedi's eyes in the sunlight and the unnatural glow of that same Jedi's lightsaber. It's the color of that Jedi's eyes in a dim room when he looks looks soft and tired, a blue that's more grey than anything resembling an actual blue. It's not one color and yet it is because he loves that color just like he loves that Jedi. He doesn't love the color just when it's pretty in one vibrant idealistic shade. He falls in love again and again when he sees it in new lights. Just like Obi-Wan.

- not to cozywan truth on main or anything but There's not a place Cody and Obi-Wan sleep better than in each other's arms. Or maybe not arms, per se, but sprawled across one another in some fashion. Touching. More often than not, in the tiny cots onboard The Negotiator, Cody ends up plastered to Obi-Wan's back, arm possessively wrapped round his front to keep him from falling off the edge. With the luxury of a bed actually made to fit two grown men, things aren't much better. Cody wakes to find he's being suffocated by Obi-Wan who, in his sleep, discovered the joys of lying directly on top of Cody. Cody's not innocent. He can count multiple occasions where he's buried his face in Obi-Wan's belly and woken up to being gently shoved away from his heated pillow because, oops, his resting place was a full bladder. Neither of them complain too much, not when it's so easy to be lulled into the warm, liquidy loose and easy clutches of cozy sleep in close quarters to the person they love. Something deep in the brain unlocks and says, 'everything's alright now, relax, let it all go--safe, safe, safe,' when Obi-Wan's cold nose finds the column of Cody's throat who's hand comes up to indulgently cards through silky hair. There's a resonating hum of rightness in their chests that says, 'home'.

[99corentine]

Afterword: Will there be a sequel to GHD?

After almost four years, GOL HAH DOV is finally a finished project. 50 chapters, just shy of 375K words (about 4-5 full novels’ worth of writing) and I don’t want to know how many hours of furiously typing, here we are at the finish line. As we started getting near the end a few people asked whether I was going to write a sequel, but the answer was too complex to put in an author’s note, so I thought I’d discuss it in more detail here.

Unfortunately, the short version of this is probably not, but let me explain why.

So, there are many things that could go in a sequel. Off the top of my head, I’ve yet to write about: the events of the Dawnguard DLC. The truth about Chrysanthe’s past. How they contend with Hermaeus Mora, who is still gunning for them. How the civil war unfolds when the First Dragonborn looks at both the Empire and Stormcloaks and says ‘nah, I’ll make my own faction’. How the Thalmor react to this. Miraak’s rise to power when he’s not allowed to use his mind control powers, and Chrysanthe’s general struggle to keep Miraak on a morally good path.

All of this could definitely make for another longfic but what I don’t have is any sort of romantic development. The trouble with writing a soulmates fic is that once the couple have overcome their personal issues, there’s very little further tension. Chrysanthe and Miraak actually got together very early in the fic (about chapter 12 out of 50) and the rest has been about them learning each other, becoming more intertwined… but I’m not really sure how they can get more intertwined, after the events of GHD. There are many external points of tension (politics, Thalmor, daedra) but there’s nothing internal - only Miraak’s dubious morality, but we already know that he’ll change his course for Chrysanthe, so what else is there to add?

Essentially, I can’t see how to further develop the relationship, and to me the romantic tension is what makes a fic worth writing. Without it, I just know that even if I started a GHD sequel, I wouldn’t have the enthusiasm to see it through to the end. Now that may change, and I might think of something new… but for the time being, I’m going to put GHD down and focus on other things.

Those other things are: 1) The Tav/Astarion Baldur’s Gate 3 longfic I’ve started, Tooth for a Tooth, which has all my attention at the minute. It’s darker than GHD but the protagonist has the same steely-stoic paladin vibe, so if you liked Chrysanthe you might like him too 2) A while ago I posted a fic idea in which the Last Dragonborn (Chrysanthe, or a totally new character) ends up in the past with pre-Apocrypha Miraak. Again this is a longfic that I’m not sure I really have the spoons for, but I’d say I’m more likely to write this than a GHD sequel 3) Various other bits and pieces, unfinished oldfics, etc.

I know that might be disappointing for some to read, but I hope my reasons make sense at least! And I hope that you still enjoy GOL HAH DOV as its own piece of work, and come back to read anything else that I might write in the future. Thank you again for coming on this Skyrim adventure with me!