#sorry i had convo with friends and . wow

[mukuharakazui]

i sound like the youngest boomer on earth whenever i say this but it really was a mistake for baby gays to learn about the term fruit. idk what it is about the internet that makes kids see a derogatory term for a marginalized group they’re part of, or even just adjacent to, which they’ve never been targeted with and decide it’s just their new Special Inside Joke Swear Word. some 16 y/o online calling a picture of a celebrity wearing a gaudy sweater fruity or faggy isn’t “reclamation” it’s just parroting homophobia and not funny in the slightest.

speaking among onesself or close friends is one thing but when it gets to the point (and it has) where people are calling real life people they barely (or don’t) know homophobic terms, it doesn’t matter if the person saying it is gay or not.

[confetti-critter]

bruh I finally get over my debilitating anxiety about donating to gaza related fundraisers because theres so many ppl that need help and idk where to begin and i never feel like my money is helping at all and the

fucking website won't load 8D

[astrxealis]

good morning 🥺

[jjmaybankswifeyx]

don’t play with me princess

zach justice x fem!reader

warnings • smutty smut smut, zach : daddy, kissing, use of yn, pet names, oral sex, flirting, angst, jealous zach, swearing , 18+

summary: you went on dropouts after being friends for years and him begging you for ages to come the podcast , you finally give in and things kick off.

*zach has his own place in this*

you were messaging zach all last night about the podcast, what time to come etc he was being so sweet telling you he’s gunna be with you the whole time but knowing zach he will probably bully you for it tomorrow on the podcast “i’ll be fine” you mumbled before dozing off to sleep.

you wake up at 11:06 to zach phoning you making sure your awake as you always sleep in, unfortunately you had just woke up and had an hour to get ready and leave as you had to be there for 12:30 and it takes 20 minutes to get there “yea you just woke me up” you say rolling out of bed “good can’t have my star guest not come” he says, you hang up the phone starting to get ready doing a natural look as you didn’t have time nor effort to do a glam look, once you finished your makeup you chose your outfit then left.

you got there about 5 minutes before the pod started saying hi to everyone “omg yn” alyssa shouts across the room running towards you engulfing you in a big hug “alyssa ahh i missed you so much” you say with a massive smile “alright alyssa she’s mine calm down” zach says appearing around the corner with a smug little smirk on his face “oh shut up zach” turning around to face alyssa again and walking into the studio.

“hello welcome or welcome back to dropouts today we have an extra special guest, my girlfriend yn y/l/n” looking at u in shock “oh you wish” looking at the mic “i do i really do, so yn” your quick to answer as your nervous as what hes gunna say “yes zach” already dreading the question “how have you been” relieved with this you start to smile “yea it’s been great honestly i’ve started my own clothing line and makeup and it’s going great!” smiling knowing how far you’ve come “wow that’s great! any boys recently ?” jared says adding to the convo “oh jared you know” you say winking at him before you both start bursting into laughter, you look over at zach and he looks like he’s burning a hole into your brain, he looks mad ? you chime in “no guys i’m jk don’t clip that” you say with a nervous laugh zach still does not look impressed until he spits out “oh yn you wouldn’t even kiss jared on the cheek never mind do the devils tango with him” smirking you reply “oh and how would you know that” he stares at you for a second “okay guys if your not subscribed to the patreon you get a 7 day free trial, you get extra bits from these podcasts also you get them earlier plus extra videos like the drunk episodes when we get me and some other people drunk and try spill some secrets” you just look at him unimpressed as he carries on.

by now your on the subject of sex and relationships jared talking about this girl he is going out with tonight and how he would love to have something with her as theyd been speaking for months “yea jared i think you just gotta go for it, no woman wants a man who takes their time, and they don’t want to beg for it either ” you say giving him a woman’s perspective “oh yn you were begging for it last night” zach says smirking earning an oh and oh shit from jared and alyssa you just completely gobsmacked on what this man just said to you “oh please like i would go to you for that your probably not even as good as you make out zach, actually alyssa can you relate to this a man always says he knows what he’s doing yet he can’t get it in the right hole” jared and alyssa start laughing hesring a very quiet yes from alyssa as zach says “oh trust me i know what i’m doing” you didn’t look impressed “hm ye still don’t believe it sorry zach” he’d had enough at this point he wanted to throw you over his shoulder, take you upstairs and prove it while you were screaming out his name “don’t play with me princess”, jared just gasped and alyssa just started laughing you however just turned over and said “of course i’m gunna mess with you other wise your gunna wind me up so” looking over at him letting your eyes drop for a mere second you saw him readjusting himself seeing a massive bulge in his pants looking up with him smirking at you.

alyssa and jared start having a conversation about something i’m not sure what i was zoned out thinking about what zach said and his bulge until you were pulled out by zach coming closer to you wanting to whisper something “i’m gunna fuck you so hard after this your not gunna be able to even speak and say i didn’t know what u was doing, you understand me gorgeous?” you nod while backing away just smiling jared and alyssa obviously caught on “um guys what you saying over there” knowing you were caught until zach chimes in “oh i was just asking yn about something i heard about her clothing line and it’s true but not able to say sorry. it’s a secret” you sigh knowing zach just saved your ass and his.

after 1 hour of you and zachs glances you started you flirt with jared to get a reaction out of zach, must say he contained himself pretty well until the pod finished you said your goodbyes to jared and alyssa claiming you were gunna hang out with zach for a while as you haven’t seen eachother in months they believed it obviously as it is true you did miss him but you needed him now, as soon as they walked out that door you said “so you gunna prove it to me or what?” walking over to him looking up batting your eye lashes without a word he smashes his lips into yours quietly letting out little moans and gasps as he picks you up taking you to his room he throws you on the bed hovering over you “hm you look so good today” moaning while he’s kissing your neck “you too baby, wanted to have my way with you since i first met you” you moan against his touch not knowing this as you thought you guys were just friends with the occasional flirt “take your clothes off princess wanna see you” he says throwing his shirt some where across the room, after hearing those words you have never done something quicker you were lying there naked while zack still had his jeans on he slowly started kissing down your stomach reaching down to your bare dripping pussy “this wet already baby? hm someone’s needy” saying with a grin before you could answer he dived into your pussy sucking your clit making you scream out in pleasure “hm zach more baby please” he starts to pump his fingers in and out of you sucking and licking your clit, you could hear his tiny little moans and the vibrations coming off, “could jared eat your pretty pussy like this baby?” he says hint of jealousy in his voice you shake your head unable to focus “words princess” he says picking up his pace “no! daddy you do it better than anybody” you say about to come until he stops what he’s doing and looks up at you “what did you just call me?” you now are very embarrassed yet the words come out you couldn’t stop it “d-daddy” he smiles looking at you “fuck princess i cannot do this i need to be in you” you sigh then spreading your legs for him as he unbuckles his belt letting the cold air hit your core “fuck gorgeous such a good girl for daddy” he says slipping into you, he’s massive so much bigger than you thought “fuck daddy your huge” that just gives him a boost and he starts picking up the pace, “oh baby you don’t how long i’ve wanted to do this” he says moaning in your ear “me too daddy needed your cock for so long hmm” screaming without a care who heard you “your mine princess” you moan at the words nesrly making you cum alone “all yours daddy” you say trying to fight for breathe “what princess didn’t quite hear you?” ramming into harder and deeper “i’m yours daddy all yours!!” shouting even louder before he utters “good girl” as his thrusts get sloppy “where do you want me beautiful” without even thinking you say “in me daddy i’m on the pill” he does a couple more thrusts before you both are cumming the hardest you ever have, nobody has ever made you feel this way and you loved it, he pulls out of you now all cocky “that prove it to you huh” saying all confident “wasn’t even that good” you say smirking “hm i wish i could believe that but your moans and words say different gorgeous” he says before getting something to clean you both up.

as you were laying there he says “i meant it you know” you look up at him confused “your mine now, not letting you go” you just kiss him as you fall asleep tangled up together.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

hope you guys like this, i am currently on the ganja writing this so i apologise if there’s any mistakes or anything❤️❤️

[going-to-ikea-for-the-fries]

It's a Match! || poly!141 x Reader

[Chapter 26] || [Chapter 27]

Pairing: 141 x gn!Reader Words: 500~ (in the video + picture) cw: accidental exhibitionism/voyeurism, good natured teasing Summary: While overcoming recent heartbreak, you decide to join Tinder in search of a rebound. Your friends advise to just Swipe Right indiscriminately... What happens when 4 soldiers from the same squad match with you? a/n: This chapter is **different**. You can read it OR watch it live! So sorry btw that the video is not embedded 😭😭🙏 a/n #2: Also this chapter is 100% inspired by this fanart by @ramvur but with Simon, instead of Price.

Chapter pre-27: Away (UPDATED!)

If you'd rather watch their text convo: CLICK HERE

It's 6 A.M. when your phone start buzzing repeatedly on the night stand next to you.

You paw at it languidly, blinking away the sleep as you attempt to unlock the phone and rub the sleep out of your eyes.

johnny: baby guess what!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11 johnny: baby johnny: babyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy johnny: if ye dont answer my texts 🙄 you: jesus christ johnny its 6am what are you doing up??? 😑 johnny: good morning love!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! johnny: weve got training today 😙 johnny: guess what happened you: what simon: Good morning sweeheart. johnny: WAIT WHAT ARE YOU DOING ANSWERING? you: good morning si 🫶 you: wait what do u mean u were calling for me no? johnny: I MEANT SIMON HES IN THE INFIRMARY HES NOT MEANT TO BE ANSWERING johnny: HOW DO YE EVEN HAVE YOUR PHONE you: i feel like u need to stop asking how he does things you: uve known him for longer than me and im not surprised anymore you: also IN THE INFIRMARY? johnny: thats what i was coming to tell you!!!!! 🙄🙄🙄🙄 you: why did u frame it like its a good thing?????????? johnny: because he got put there by Kyle during training johnny: we were practising chokeholds and he passed out you: I STILL DONT SEE HOW THATS A GOOD THING JOHNNY johnny: HES FINE YE DON'T UNDERSTAND johnny: HE GOT ROCK HARD WHILE KYLE HAD HIS LEGS WRAPPED AROUND HIS THROAT you: WHAT??? you: tell me more 👀 johnny: 😏😏 johnny: he was wearing shorts and his cock just popped out you: LIKE OUT OUT? johnny: out out 🍆 you: wow 😮‍💨 you: did u get any pictures? 👀 johnny: i did bonnie do ye want them? 😏 johnny: even caught the look in prices and kyles faces when it happened you: send me send me send me you: wait it happened in front of them???? johnny: worse happened in front of everyone 🥴 we were training with other units you: oh shit you: that has to have been embarrassing you: is he okay though from passing out? you: johnny? you: wow imagine ignoring me kyle: johnny's a little occupied at the moment lovie! kyle: good morning btw! 😚 you: good morning ky!! 🫶 you: occupied? kyle: ghost's chasing him for telling you everything and johnny's running for his life 😭 you: 🙃 you: normal day then? kyle: normal day 🥴 you: okay then well hope the training went well kyle: it did! 😏 anyway got to go kyle: pls go back to sleep need you well rested lovie you: i will i will.

Sighing a bit, you set your phone down on the charger again and attempt to go back to sleep... unsuccessfully so.

After half an hour of tossing and turning, you find yourself grabbing the phone again and your thumb clicks on John's name in your contacts.

You don't text him often, the last time having been nearly a week before, but, right now, you felt like you should.

you: the lads just woke me up you: johnny more specifically 🙄 you: now i cant get to sleep again john: if it's any consolation john: I told him not to john: need help? you: how would u help? john: can call you and sing you a lullaby? you: pls dont john: then I'm out of ideas darling you: u could help in another way john: and what's that? 😏 you: remember how u said u had a house of ur own you: and if i ever needed a break we could go there? john: i see 😏 john: want me to take you away for the weekend darling? you: yes please

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

taglist (CLOSED! not adding anyone else, sorry!):

@daisychainsinknots , @bunnysdaydreams , @iite-cool , @lahniu , @pagesfalling , @tapioca-milktea1978 , @live-love-be-unique , @thelaisydazy , @littleghosthunter , @bossva , @emotion-no-hot-yes-hotel-trivago , @chamomiletealeaf , @ghosts-hoe , @kariiiel , @ltbarnes , @irregulardongyoung , @spacelia , @hayleybarnesx , @cod-z , @frescoisnotinthemilitary , @leeeenistop , @lucienbarkbark , @xxshadowbabexx

@severenswife , @enarien, @agoodmoviekiss , @l0lziez , @whos-fran , @greatstormcat , @openup-yourmind , @neoarchipelago , @sodavrr , @cutiecusp , @lilliumrorum , @c-nstantine , @kneelforloki , @comeonatmebruh , @codsunshine , @waiting-so-long , @captainquake42 , @gazspookiebear , @mynameismisty , @reap3erslov3 , @reaper-chan666 , @poohkie90 , @kitwithnokat , @stick-the-dumbass , @mothsdrabbles , @justanerd1 , @thesinsoflust , @thriving-n-jiving , @blckbrrybasket

[freak-accident419]

Good Tidings

Josh Futturman x GN!Reader

Summary: You and Josh barely have any time to yourselves due time traveling nonstop, trying to save the fate of humanity. However, being at the Futturman’s Christmas dinner party granted you two a fair amount of time.

Word Count: 2.9k

Content: 18+ Smut, MDNI, gender neutral reader (no genitals specified, it’s just vague penetration), cockwarming, lots of fluff, takes place during Future Man S1E6 “A Blowjob Before Dying”, too much shitty sex jokes n puns (im sorry) (not), giddy+silly+sweet love making, you think you are sooo fucking funny, more goofy than serious/lustful, you two are very much in love, more plot (high ass dialogue) than porn tbh

(A/n: Merry Christmas to those who celebrate!! Hope you enjoy this muahahaha and thank you all for your recent support! First smut written on this account, so be gentle with me please !)

-

You, Tiger, Wolf, and Josh were at the Futturman household, schedule disrupted due to the reluctance of Josh’s parents. They insisted that you all join them for their small Christmas dinner party. You were all sat down at the dining table, as well as the neighbors, Josh’s Uncle Barry, and Diane’s friend, Wanda (who was especially invited to perhaps keep Barry at bay).

While Tiger was mostly impatient and displeased with every mindless convo and laughter, talk revolved around several topics like DNA kits or Wolf’s strangely fascinating culinary.

You sat beside your boyfriend, Josh, slightly nervous about the time you were wasting. Ever since you’ve been dragged into the whole ‘Biotic Wars is real’ and ‘kill or be killed’ shit, you and Josh have been dealing with the worst, unimaginable shit ever. With the two of your adrenaline wearing off, you gradually processed everything that’s happened the past few days since you were never given a break. Hence the hand holding under the table as you two would seek comfort from one another.

But you attempted to distract yourself from the deaths you’ve witnessed and the near-death experiences you’ve had to your best ability by indulging in every conversation.

“Gabe, honey, tell them about—about the recent fishing trip we went on,” Josh’s mother, Diane encouraged to her husband with her sweet, achingly kind voice. You had so much respect for Josh’s parents, so it was pretty easy for you all to hit it off well. They loved you. In fact, they were heavily relieved that Josh had finally found someone, let alone someone as amazing as you.

Gabe let out a hearty chuckle as he prepared himself to tell the table his story.

“So, a couple of days ago, Diane and I went on a small fishing trip. And I remembered an old trick back in the day that attracted a lot of trout,” he explained as you picked up your glass of wine, sipping some generously. Diane smiled at him with a nod as he continued. “One of the very efficient ways to go about fish bait is blowing worms.”

You choke on your wine, holding in a laugh, coughing a bit instead as Josh looks at you with a knowing smile. “I’m sorry, what?” You asked, trying not to grin too widely. Did you hear that right?

“Blowing worms,” Gabe repeated, getting a confined chuckle out of you and Josh. “You inflate the worms with air, which makes them float instead of having your bait be at the very bottom. It’s perfect, especially near the winter time. Worked like a charm.”

“Ohh,” you gasp in wonder. You chuckle to yourself before you spontaneously say, “Yeah, actually, I think I did do that a few times. Blew a-a worm.”

You looked at Josh, thinking you were being hilarious, but he looked at you with surprised eyes and parted lips of shock that slowly transitioned into a smile.

“Really?” Josh’s father expressed with intrigue. “I didn’t even know you fish. You have someone teach you that method, or—”

“Oh, no, Mr. Futturman, I,” you speak as you occasionally switch from looking at him to Josh. “I think it’s a very popular method. It’s a pretty natural instinct, you know? Blowing worms, that is.”

“Wow, really? Always thought it was an old-fashioned sort of thing.”

“Nah, far from old-fashioned, it’s almost contemptuous!”

You did pretty well at suppressing your laughter, because you sounded really earnest. Josh covered his mouth, amused by your subtle humor.

“Joshy, we didn’t know that Y/n likes fishing. We could’ve taken them on our trip. In fact, we could’ve all went,” Diane suggests as she looked at Josh and then you.

It was like everyone at the table was blind to your immature, yet humorous implication. Except, of course, your boyfriend.

“Oh, no worries, Mrs. Futturman,” you insisted kindly. “I don’t usually fish. Plus, blowing worms can be very exhausting.”

“Y/n—” Josh reacted, but interrupted himself with a suppressed laugh.

“You think so?” Mr. Futturman raised an eyebrow. “I just stick a syringe in them, inflate it, and bam, it’s all thick and ready to g—”

You and Josh burst out laughing, holding onto the table and each other. You swore there were slight tears coming out of your eyes as both of your faces were red. You felt overjoyed to feel happiness and delight for the first time ever since your involvement in the mission. And you felt even more glad that it was your boyfriend that you fooled around with.

“Sorry, sorry,” Josh says after his laughter died down as the entire table was confused. “I just—We just thought about a, um, moment when—Um… Actually, Y/n and I did go fishing once. Isn’t that—isn’t that right?”

You nod and go along with it, detaining your giggles.

“Well, anyways, we actually did that method, and yeah, you’re right, it works like a charm!” He exclaimed with joy as his parents smile at him with approval and pride.

“Bet the worm was pretty small, huh?” Tiger jumped in wittily, however, in a coldly nonchalant manner.

“And pathetic!” Wolf blurted.

“Hey, even if that might’ve been true—might’ve—it-it probably had a personality, you know?” He reckoned with a shrug, making you laugh again.

***

“You are—are fucking terrible, you know that?” Josh quickly muttered under his breath as you two continued to kiss each other deeply on his bed. “Those were my parents.”

“C’mon, baby, admit it, it was comedy gold,” you giggle, pressing your lips to his once more by tugging his black, skinny necktie towards you as you remained sitting on his lap.

The dinner party was still going on downstairs. After a long time of looking at each other longingly at the table, you two decided to excuse yourselves in order to “prepare gifts for Josh’s coworkers that he forgotten to wrap” in his room.

When you guys rushed in his room, you couldn’t take your hands off each other, immediately making out once the door was locked. However, you then had to close all his blinds before you met him back on the bed. This wasn’t new to you, none of it was. The soft, warm orange that his room’s light emitted strangely comforted you, as well as being back on his soft, spacey mattress.

Was it a good idea to leave Tiger and Wolf alone with Josh’s family and company? Probably not. But you’ve taught them enough shit. They tolerate Josh’s parents, so why not a few other guests as well? And you’ll only be gone for no longer than five minutes, you’d hoped.

You bring your hands to his pants, attempting to unbuckle his belt. “Shit—What the—What the fuck is this?” You grumble, Josh laughing at you as you struggle.

“I think it’s—” He giggled, bringing his own hands to his belt, trying to remove it, pulling. “I think it’s stuck.”

“What the shit?” You wheeze. “Fuckin’—Fuckin’ cock block!” You continue to mess with the belt, trying your best to unbuckle it.

“Wait, you—you’re almost there, you—”

“Oh my god! Holy shit! I got it!” You let out a surprised gasp, quickly unbuttoning and unzipping his pants right after.

“Oh shit! Flawless victory!” He exclaimed, making you stop in your tracks, looking back up at him.

“You did not just quote Mortal Kombat because I successfully unbuckled your belt,” you raise an eyebrow, nevertheless amused by his dorkiness.

“Maybe,” he answered smugly.

“You’re lucky I am in love with you, otherwise, I probably wouldn’t have let that slide,” you chuckle.

“Oh, come on. You’d love my video game references either way,” he insisted.

“I’m serious, Josh, the amount of things I’ve let slide because I love you is kind of crazy. Let me just say, I am so glad I met you after the ‘apple juice’ incident that Ray told me about.”

“Ray told you about that?”

“He told me a lot of things. Mostly the embarrassing things. I think he wanted to freak me out, you know? Always thought I was too good for you.”

You pulled his pants off, throwing it carelessly down on the floor. Your lips attached once more as he snickered as you then cupped his face with your warm hands. You look at your lover, his big, brown, desperate eyes looking at you with utmost adoration. “Well, jokes on him, he was entirely wrong. You are so good to me, you know that?”

He smiles at you softly, and you could sense how flustered he felt to hear that (the blushing patently gave it away). “You’re the one who’s been on my side since forever. Even when you got involved in all this shit that you didn’t even have to be in. You-You could’ve called me crazy, and-and broken up with me, but you believed me and stayed by my side, even knowing that things were gonna get dirty. And they did, get really dirty.” Rest in peace Janis and Carl? Or, rather, die, you evil perf-cocks? Eh, doesn’t fucking matter. “You’re so good for me, sometimes I can’t believe you’re even real.”

You giggle sweetly as you give him another kiss, a quiet smack caused by your lips deftly leaving his own to speak. “Well, I’m here and I’m real, and I’ll always be there for you, baby,” you reassure. You were perfect for him. Indefinitely.

He smiled blissfully. “I love you so much.”

You two made out passionately until you were laying under him, the lower halves of your bodies bare as you discarded the necessary clothes.

“Do you think your parents and everyone else knew about the worm thing or are they just that… I don’t know… clueless?” You asked endearingly under your breath as your fingers entangle in his soft, brown hair.

“Hmm. Possibly,” he reckons, raising his eyebrows as he thought about it. “That was still kind of evil of you, though.”

“Me, personally, I thought it was hilarious.”

“Blowing worms?”

“C’mon, your father set himself up for that.”

“Tiger called it small,” he muttered lamentably. “And Wolf said it was pathetic.”

“Jeez, whatever happened to personality?” You chuckle softly.

He sighed. “They still sort of called me out.”

“Shut up. It’s average, to say the least. Doesn’t matter either way, you’re enough.”

“But—”

“Josh, if it bothers you this much, then just prove them wrong right now,” you reply with a laugh.

“As in—?”

“Josh, c’mon, we don’t have time anyways. They’re expecting us any minute because of that shitty made-up story excuse. I love foreplay, dude, but I’m pretty sure we didn’t acknowledge the time at all. Quickies are definitely not our cup of tea. Y—” Your breath hitched as you felt his tip prod at your sensitive entrance. He gave you a soft, comforting kiss on the nose. You looked into each other’s eyes deeply, then your lips crashed into each other’s as the two of you stifled your moans once Josh finally thrusted in.

“Y-You know you’re p-perfect just the—mm—way you are, right?” You ask gently, wrapping your arms around his neck.

He smiled at this, kissing your lips once more, beginning to move. Your heart fluttered each second you felt him thrust in and out, slightly and satisfyingly stretching you. His hips moved quite skillfully, but also slightly clumsily, which was nonetheless admirable.

Your usual soft moans and gasps would be replaced by stifled grunts and sighs, due to the company downstairs. As much as you wanted the whole world to know that Josh Futturman was yours and only yours, you also had dignity—plus, it was his goddamn parents downstairs.

You giggled as you felt his nose against yours each rough kiss. “Y-You know, however, I think the only complaint I have about you is the fact that you hate Super Mario Bros.” You point out with a chuckle.

“Y/n, in my—agh—defense, it literally makes no sense. Like, why would there be pipes that are—”

“Okay, why rely solely on logic and rationality, hm, Futturman? I thought video games were all about escape. It’s all just harmless fun.”

“Yeah, well, I’m much more into games with thought-out plots and challenges,” he remarked, making you roll your eyes playfully. “Anyways, it pretty much just got ruined for me even more when Tracy at the video game store talked about Luigi having a very hairy, Italian cock.”

You raise an eyebrow.

“Baby, I love you. However, your goddamn dick is currently inside of me. Please do not talk about Luigi’s theoretic hairy penis.”

“Noted,” he assents, going back to kissing you passionately, while moving slowly inside of you, yet deeper with each thrust. You let out a quiet, pleasured gasp as you felt him fill you perfectly, his hands lovingly gripping your waist to keep you still.

Your eyes closed as you indulged in the feeling of his gentle thrusts, him peppering kisses on your neck, softly chuckling under his breath. He guessed he was still in disbelief that he had someone as amazing as you.

“I… I still can’t believe someone as perfect as you would ever go out with a loser like me,” he scoffed, pressing more kisses against your neck and jaw.

“Hey, seriously?” You frown, holding his face in your hands once more, stroking his cheeks with your thumbs. “You are… a lot of things, Josh. But a loser isn’t one of them. Okay? You are so kind and funny and caring and thoughtful a-and—m-mm—amazing i-in general.”

“I—Fuck. I—I don’t deserve you,” he panted.

“J-Jesus Christ, sh-shut your fuckin’ rathole. Yes you do, baby. You deserve me as much as I deserve you.”

It was becoming harder to focus on your words as you continued to feel an increased sensation and pleasure as his thrusts quicken and falter. You let out a small gasp as you tense things up by wrapping your legs around his waist to bring him in even deeper. You two had been speaking and giggling to each other constantly that you didn’t even notice the lewd, wet, slapping against the skin that came from each heavy thrust. Josh grabbed one of your hands, interlocking your fingers tightly on the mattress beside your head.

“J-Josh, I—” You begin breathlessly.

“I know, me too,” he grunts as soft, inaudible whimpers and whines leave his lips while the movement of his hips stuttered. His rhythm was becoming unsteady, but it was also increasing in speed. “I—Y/n, f-fuck, I’m c—”

“Sh-shit, baby, I—” You pant as you felt closer and closer over the edge, every mere feeling increasing your stimulation. You bring your hand to cover your mouth and suppress any loud moans as you finally released, the knot in your stomach undoing itself as you sigh afterwards once your hand left your mouth. Josh came exactly right after you as his hips jolted for the final time, spilling his warm, white seed inside of you, burying his face in your neck to muffle a high-pitched grunt and acute whines.

You two were breathing heavily, kissing each other’s lips softly and lovingly after you both came down from your high. You two never moved from your position, still fragile and sore. Josh caressed the side of your waist under your shirt, his head resting in your neck as you moved your hand to play with his hair, holding him in your arms.

“This is probably the only time we’ll have together alone before we have to continue with the damn mission,” you figured, tangling his strands of hair in between your fingers.

“It’s bullshit,” he mumbles, his thumb continuing to rub your waist.

“Enjoy the moment while we can?” You suggested with a small chuckle.

“Yeah, I guess,” he sighed dejectedly.

A beat.

“Hm,” you hum thoughtfully.

“Yeah?”

“Nothing, I just… I like it whenever you’re inside of me,” you comment softly. This was probably the most affectionately vulnerable and honest you have been with him. Your tone lacked any intention for humor or lust; you were genuine.

He lifted his head up from your neck. “Seriously?”

“I don’t know. It just feels right. You know, as if you were, like, made for me exactly,” you whispered lovesickly, looking down at his sweet, plump lips to his profound, gorgeous brown eyes. “I wanna stay like this a little longer. You’re so perfect for me. I love you so much.”

“I love you too,” he replied with a smile, kissing your lips soothingly.

Then suddenly,

“Futturman! L/n! Get out of there, we gotta go now! Operation Cameronium!” Tiger called from the other side of the door. “Goddamnit. The fucking—tiny man—baby thing—is, just, really starting to piss me off. Let’s go!”

You and Josh looked at each other for a while in silence before bursting out into laughter.

“We-we better go before she considers murdering little baby Wallace,” you suggest with a soft smile.

“Yeah… Wait. Do you really think—”

“No…” You answer before he could finish his sentence. “I know she seems all stoic on the outside, but I feel like the past few days, she changed a bit. Empathy-wise. Slightly, at the very least.” Josh nods.

“I’m really gonna miss this,” he sighs.

“Me too. But don’t worry, once we fix everything, we have all the time in the world together,” you assert.

“Okay,” he smiles sweetly, kissing your lips before slowly pulling out of you, leaving you to feel empty and slightly bummed.

The two of you, with your clothes back on and hair quickly fixed, you waltzed downstairs with no problem. Your hands had been interlocked, faces a bit flushed as you smile to yourselves.

“You two sure look happy,” Diane expresses joyfully. “You really got into the Christmas spirit, wrapping all those gifts upstairs, huh?”

You giggled under your breath. “Oh, yeah, definitely, Mrs. Futturman. Uh, very much so. I really love Christmas, you know? The gift wrapping Joshy and I did upstairs and, you know, all the Christmas traditions. ‘Specially, ‘specially the yule log.” You look at Josh with a knowing grin as he just listened in, suspecting nothing at all. “Really makes you feel warm inside, am I right?”

[moonstruckme]

OK so this idea is for like Sirius its the holiday and they’re exchanging gifts well siris gift to her it’s kind of meh not a lot of thought into it. So she freaks out because her gift to Siri is like really personal after she opens up her gift she snatches his away from him and runs(of course he gets her tho) Blah blah blah cute convo turns out he had another gift but was scared to give it to her blah blah blah

Xoxo love you 💕

Thanks for requesting sweetness! I am totally tapped out of gift ideas atm so you'll have to forgive the poor gift choice in this, just imagine them as whatever you like haha

Sirius Black x fem!reader ♡ 1.2k words

“Come on,” you tug Sirius over to your Christmas tree by the wrist, sitting in front of it eagerly. 

“I thought we were going to do gifts after the movie,” Sirius complains, letting you tug him down beside you with a reluctance you know has to be feigned. Sirius loves gifts, giving as well as getting them. You’d been just friends for years, and you’d held back from getting him anything too sappy that might reveal your humiliating mega-crush, but now that you’re dating you’ve finally given yourself permission to get him whatever you like. 

“Oh, don’t bother, I know you want yours already,” you tease, fishing it out from under the tree and setting the box in front of him. The resistance doesn’t completely fade from Sirius’ expression, but he gives you a small smile. 

“Fine, I’ll be generous,” he says. “You can open yours first.” 

You grin at him, leaning over to kiss him on the lips and marveling at the fact that you can. “Thanks! I’m so excited.” 

“I can tell,” he jokes, somewhat quieter than usual. It nettles at something in your nervous system, but you ignore it for now, taking the tissue paper out of the little bag with an enthusiasm you can’t bother to be embarrassed about. 

You peer in, and it’s all you can do to keep the smile plastered on your face when you see what’s inside. “Candies,” you say, imbuing your voice with as much pep as you can manage. “Wow, I’ll be well fed this year. Thanks, Siri!” You can’t stand to stay under his gaze a second longer, swooping in for another kiss. It feels stilted and awkward. 

“They’re your favorites,” he says with a tentative little smile. “I thought I’d better stock you up.” 

“You’re a genius.” You grin, unwrapping one of the candies and popping it in your mouth. “Mm, thank you, honey.” 

“Course.” He looks down at his present, starting to fiddle with the ribbon. “My turn, I guess.” 

Your heart turns to stone, dropping all the way to your stomach with a dull thud. “Actually,” your voice squeaks a bit as you reach forward, taking your gift back, “I think I gave you the wrong one.” You start looking under the tree, trying to find a replacement that won’t be too sorely missed. 

Sirius brow puckers. “Really? It had my name on it.” 

“No, I think this one is for Mary—”

“Babe, I saw my name right there.” He leans over you, taking the present from where you’ve stowed it in your lap. “See? Right on the top.” 

Your blood rushes in your ears, which is ridiculous, this is Sirius, you’ve known him for years, you shouldn’t be nervous around him—but fuck, how can you really be sure you know each other at all after what he just gave you? If he’s expecting something similar, you’re about to be so mortified. “I think that might have been a mix-up,” you say weakly. “I’m pretty sure yours has someone else’s name on it too—”

“Hey,” Sirius seizes your wrist when you grab for the gift again, holding it protectively to his chest, “what’s wrong with you? I know you didn’t mix up the names, sweetheart.” You strain against his grip for a few moments, but Sirius is surprisingly strong when he decides to be. It’s little effort for him to keep you at bay. He gives you a hard look. “What’s going on?” 

“I just…” You give up your attempts to steal the gift back, but you can’t look at him. You gnaw at your lip. “I’m sorry, I might have gone a bit overboard. It’s…you can open it, just, sorry.” 

Sirius' features soften, but he’s quiet, wary as he peels off the wrapping paper. Your heart climbs back up your throat when he opens the box. For a horrifying second, he’s frozen, but then his hand dips into the box and emerges with your gift, holding it all too delicately. 

“Baby,” his voice is barely more than a whisper as he admires the small clay ornament, a likeness of his animagus form. “Where did you get this?” 

“I made it,” you admit, shoulders gravitating towards your ears. “I couldn’t find one that looked right in the stores, so…”

“You made it?” Sirius sounds awed. “Fuck, it’s amazing.” His eyes move to yours, still holding your gift suspended in the air between you. “Thank you, sweetheart. I love it.” 

It’s like someone’s been inflating a balloon in your chest and has just finally let it deflate. You can breathe again. “I’m really glad,” you say, and your smile may not be huge but at least it’s not faked. “I was worried it was too much.” 

“No, this is perfect.” Sirius places the ornament back in its box with heartbreaking care, giving you a sad look. “Fuck, I’m an ass.” 

“No, you’re not—” you start automatically, but he cuts you off. 

“I am. I’m a total coward, too. I’m so sorry, doll, I just—I freaked out.” He puts a hand in his hair, fingers curling in the dark locks. “I have a better gift for you, just one second.” 

He stands, leaving you in confused silence. You hear something rustling by the entryway of your flat, and then Sirius comes back a second later with a nicely wrapped box. 

“What’s this?” you ask when he sets it in your lap. 

“Your real present.” Sirius seems almost bashful, looking down as he gets situated on the floor again. “Go on, open it.” 

You almost don’t want to destroy the wrappings on this gift, clearly done with much more care than the first, but you take the paper off bit by bit, opening the top of the box. 

“Sirius,” you breathe. “Honey, what is all this?”

“It’s, uh, it’s just stuff from our first few dates.” You look up, and he’s playing with his rings. “Pictures, receipts, ticket stubs, shit like that. I know you’re a sap for that stuff, so.” 

“I’m a sap?” Laughter comes fizzing up out of you despite the tears blurring your vision. “You’re the one who collected it all!”

“Oh, technicalities, I only—hey.” He finally meets your eyes, noticing your state. “Hey, don’t cry. Shit, I knew this would happen. I should have stuck with the candy.” 

“I don’t understand,” you warble as he chases determinedly after your tears with painfully gentle fingers. “Why were there two?” 

Sirius sighs, pressing an apologetic kiss to your cheek. “Like I said, I freaked out. I was planning on giving you this, but on the way over I started thinking about how we haven’t been dating that long, and maybe it was too soon for something so…relationship-y, you know? So I panicked and bought a bunch of candy at the store.” 

You’re laughing by the end of it, shoulders shaking with amusement even as tears continue to dribble down your face. Sirius coos and kisses them away. 

“I guess I am a sap,” you say cheerily. “I never even thought about if my gift would be weird.” 

“Not until I made you,” Sirius groans, pulling you in for a hug. “Pretty sure that doesn’t make you a sap so much as it makes me an idiot, sweetheart. I’m sorry.” 

“Don’t be.” You smile into his shoulder, curling your fingers into the material of his shirt. “We both got to give our sappy gifts, and if the apocalypse goes down, I’ve got enough candy to last through New Years’.” 

[luvrxbunny]

I need something borderline illegal. Like dark and twisted. Like I want to question my moral compass but read on.

Am I asking for dad’s best friend!Joel? pshhhhhh. Am I asking for bratty! reader?? Pshhhhhh. Am I asking for anything???

Am I asking for smutty smut?! Yes I am.

Ofc if you are uncomfortable with any of these don’t hesitate to ignore this and also no pressure ily ❤️

a/n: reader isn't bratty, im sorry! i forgot :((

sleep

pairing: dbf!Joel Miller x f!virgin!reader

summary: Joel can’t stay away from you any longer.  

warnings: 18+ MDNI, alcohol, voyeurism/somnophilia + dub-con, dry humping, cum in pants

wc: 4.0k

a/n: i hope this is dark enough!! the only reason the ask is a ss instead of the actual thing is cus i formatted the whole story then realized i forgot to put it in the reply to the ask (loosely proofread)

It’s 2 am and Joel can’t stop thinking about you. How you’re sleeping soundly in his room, in his bed, in his shirt as pajamas because you had “forgotten to pack some”, something you both knew was a lie. He knows you’re toying with him, you started a bit before, but since you’ve turned 18? It's just been on rapid fire. 

He pulls out his phone and scrolls through your text thread, scoffing at every other conversation. It was so apparent, in every text, how badly you want him. 

Mon, Aug 16 at 4:41 AM

bbg: big man! text me when u wake up i have a joke

You: Why are you awake at this time?

bbg: wtf why are YOU awake 🤨 

You: I have trouble sleeping, you know that.

bbg: aww poor joey 😢

You: Are you going to answer my question, darling?

bbg: im doing skincare and stuff

You: You have to wake up this early for that stuff?

bbg: can’t put a price on feeling bonita 

You: Why are you speaking Spanish now?

bbg: nevermind lmao

bbg: so have u tried meditation

You: What?

bbg: for your sleeping troubles

You: I’m not that kind of guy.

bbg: what about getting off

You: Excuse me? 

bbg: like masturbation n stuff

You: I know what you’re saying.

You: I don’t understand why you’re talking about this with me.

bbg: we haven’t even talked about it 😭 

bbg: obviously we can end the convo if ur uncomfy but its a very good way to fall asleep

He remembers needing a pause after he read that text for the first time. It had only been four months since your birthday and you were already drastically different. Joel never expected it, he always thought your feelings had already reached their limit but it turns out you were holding back because you weren’t of age. Now that you are… He doesn’t know what he’s going to do. His morals may not be strong enough for the thought of  “ his best friend's daughter” to hold him back. He’s already rationalized himself out of the “daughter's best friend” thought. You’re not even going to school together anymore. Sarah lives on campus so you guys never see each other and you barely ever text. 

You: I have not.

bbg: what? literally how? 

bbg: you should

bbg: it totally works

You: That’s good to know. 

You: Get back to your skincare, honey. I’ll message you later. 

Mon, Aug 16 at 5:03 AM

bbg: joel? 

Mon, Aug 16 at 5:37 AM

bbg: are you masturbating? 

You: Sweetheart. You can’t ask me things like that. It’s not right.

bbg: u didnt answer! i got curious

You: Still.

bbg: i dont see the problem we’re both adults 🫢

You: Barely.

bbg: dont be mean

You: Do you need something

You: I said I’d text you later

bbg: wow no punctuation?

You: Busy

bbg: getting off? 

He remembers staring at your text, unbelieving that you’d send him something like that, so forward, so dirty. He remembers the thought that you were joking. Obviously, you don’t expect him to say yes, that’s why you asked in the first place. Maybe his perverted mind was interpreting your behavior as flirting but you’re just being yourself around him. All these thoughts were swirling in his head but the feeling of his hand flying over his cock, pretending it’s yours, that you're in his ear whispering to him... That thought was stronger, that feeling was stronger. 

You: Yes.

bbg: good. have fun, joey

He gets up for his fourth beer, hoping to drown the impure thoughts, starring you, that plague his mind. It’d be so easy to have you, you’ve been throwing yourself at him since you turned 17. He’s been ignoring it, adamantly. It wasn’t right, despite the age difference, the fact that you’re his daughter’s best friend and his best friend’s daughter. On top of that, you only just turned 18. 

You’ve been staying at Joel’s for a month. He takes the guest room because you say that his bed is better. You haven’t gone home because your dad is still working on your birthday present/room renovations and he doesn't want you to see it until it’s done. He offered up Joel’s house to keep you, knowing his best friend wouldn't mind, unknowing that his best friend was corrupt for his daughter. 

Joel was trying to ignore the way his body was heating up, still scrolling through the texts. He remembers that conversation perfectly. He remembers the adrenaline that was coursing through him as he confessed. He remembers how hard he came at your response. When thinking about this conversation he also remembers the guilt, it’s the most vivid emotion he remembers, usually. But the alcohol seems to be drowning that part out, and Joel scrolls on. 

He finds a patch of texts that he actively avoids, usually. It’s picture after picture of you in the most adorable outfits in the most suggestive positions. There are plenty of you lying on your back, some with your head turned to show off your perfectly curved, unmarked, un-bitten, neck. There are a few where you’re sitting down with the camera angled up, giving Joel too many situations his head can come up with. Then there’s the worst one, his favorite- he doesn’t even know how you took this one. You’re sitting on your knees, hands rested on your thighs and you’re looking up at the camera with a shy smile. 

There are two things about this photo that really fuck him up. 

First, your smile, the way it lets him know that you’re trying to fuck him up, you know what you’re doing with this pose, this positioning, you’re even embarrassed by it, a little nervous about it but you still felt the need to take the photo, for him. 

Second, the height, and the way the camera is positioned shows him that these photos were specifically crafted for him because the height the camera is at is exactly how he’d see you if you were on your knees like that for him. 

You made sure that he noticed because the very next day, you needed him to tie a bow in your hair and instead of waiting for him to get off the couch you placed yourself on the ground, between his legs, in this pose. He had to hide his erection until you left and then fight the urge to get himself off in your room for the rest of the night. 

He glances at his room door, you’re sleeping so soundly in there.

She wouldn’t even notice if someone went in there right now. She definitely wouldn’t notice me… Hell, as if she’d mind either way… I mean- Would she?

The alcohol clouds his thoughts, gives him bad ideas, and then convinces him that they’re good- this one being one of them. He grabs his almost-finished beer and heads to the fridge to grab a fifth one, knowing he’ll be in there for a while. 

He does this sometimes, you look so peaceful when you sleep… it’s the only time he can admire you without putting all his relationships at risk. He reaches the door and turns the knob slowly to avoid creaking. He enters the room, his socks padding his footsteps, and the darkness gives him no shadow. He moves one of your tops off of his desk chair and turns it to face your sleeping figure while placing his beers down. You’re already bringing a smile to his face. You’ve got your face shoved into one of his pillows, your arm tucked under it, and your leg is pulled up to your waist, sticking out from under his tan comforter. You’re wearing one of his hoodies for sleepwear—

Fuck.

and it doesn’t look like you have anything on your bottom half. It’s a little cold in his room so little goosebumps have bloomed over your exposed skin. He takes a swig of beer, finishing his fourth as he examines you. Your face twitches for a moment, your eyebrows furrow, and your nose twitches like a rabbit before calming back down. He opens the other beer and fills his mouth with it, hoping that the alcohol stops the fluttering in his stomach while he drinks it down. 

You shiver a bit but your leg doesn’t move, the goosebumps just become more prominent. His hand is reaching out for you before he can think, rubbing your calf gently to soothe and warm you up a bit. You let out a relieved sigh at his contact and your leg presses further into his warmth. He has to take a deep breath as his mind runs wild, convincing him that this is some sort of sign, that even in you’re sleep you’re trying to be closer to him, that he should just give in. 

No, she’s your best friend's daughter. Sure she’s her own person now, legally an adult, an’ can make decisions for herself… an’ yeah she’s not owned or controlled by anyone and just cause I’m friends with her father ain’t a fair reason to completely rule her out from being a potential partner… Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad… maybe it’s actually more fucked up for me to avoid her just cause of who birthed her. That’s totally not fair to her! I mean I know I wouldn't want anyone judging me based on who my parents are y’know? Maybe I should put myself in her shoes. 

His breathing speeds up as he breaks through his last piece of resistance. Now he’s just trying to figure out how soon he can have you. 

I’ll have to court her first, flirt with her a bit before asking her out to dinner, then maybe she’ll accept my offer to be my girlfriend by the third date… From there maybe she’ll have sex with me for the three-month anniversary… she might be a bit more timid than that but we’re looking at a four- five-month plan… That can work- I can definitely work with that.

You whine and stretch your body, your legs straighten and your arms spread out, you turn and rest one arm on top of your head before you lift your leg, bending it above your waist but with the other one this time. The new position leaves the blanket covering nothing but one of your inner thighs and to add insult to injury your raised arms lift his hoodie, revealing a beautiful sliver of your stomach. 

Or I could have her now.

The thought is too powerful to stop, his opportunity is too perfect, Ellie is out with whatever girl she’s currently entertaining, and Sarah doesn’t live here anymore. Your father would never be awake at this time and Joel is hard, wanting, and so so ready for you. He’s crawling into bed beside you after downing half his beer for the nerves. 

He shouldn’t. He knows he shouldn’t. 

He settles next to you and your leg presses into him again, searching for him and his warmth. You slowly turn to him as he stares at you, watching how sluggish your movements are in your sleep. You snuggle into the pillow in front of him and take a long inhale of its scent, a little smile resting on your lips while you breathe out. Your face is inches from his, and his hand is down his pants in an instant. 

The relief is heavenly, he’s been throbbing for you since he read those texts. He can’t help the way he reacts to you. He can smell your toothpaste on your breath as you gently snore in front of him. He wraps his warm hand around his cock and his soft lips part into an ‘O’. His eyes roll back for a second but he immediately focuses them back on you. He’s tugging at himself violently, not even thinking about savoring this moment, just needing to cum for you. He’s trying to hold in his sounds but you look so pretty, just seeing your face while he’s touching himself makes everything better, somehow you’ve turned his sensitivity as high as it can go.

Little whines and whimpers slip into your dream state. You’re confused by the sound, the rustling that coming from—? In front of you? Your brows furrow as you try to open your eyes. “Fuck” You hear someone say. It sounds like… 

You open your eyes just in time to see Joel yank his hand out of his sweatpants and scramble as far as he can get from you before falling off the bed. You’re still confused as you take his form in. His shirt has ridden up a bit, exposing the salt and pepper hairs on his tummy. His hair is sticking all over the place, he stinks of beer, and his eyes are wide, focused on you. “Joey?”

Despite the horrid situation he’s in, his cock is still leaking for you, pulsing at the nickname. He can’t answer, he has to bite back a moan as he feels himself leak into the fabric of his pants. “Joel? What—” Your eyes flutter, almost falling shut but you shake yourself out of it and— Fuck.

You move closer to him. 

You’re too snuggly when you’re sleeping, too cute, and too dumb. You’re not even questioning why your father’s best friend was in bed with you while you were sleeping. You don't want to risk him leaving and you don’t mind in the first place, you actually thought you were dreaming at first. Your heart almost stopped when your fingers actually latched onto his shirt after reaching out for him. He’s stiff as a board, deterring your touch so you pull your hands into your chest and bury your face in his. 

Joel is almost shaking in exertion as you press your soft little body against his. It’s just your upper half, leaning into him and finding wam solace in his chest. He can handle this, he thinks. He can calm down, and be with you like this. He’s supposed to court you first anyway, he can’t believe himself. Was he really going to just get off with you in the same bed? What kind of pervert would even try something like that?

You hike your leg up over his waist, half asleep, not realizing your motions. 

All his perverted feelings return with a vengeance. 

You wiggle around a bit, trying to get comfortable but his cock twitches, flicking into your soft lips for a moment. At first, you really didn’t know what it was, all you knew was that the sensation felt good. So of course you chased it. Your hips grind into his cock arrhythmically, trying to find that same angle again, not realizing that you’re basically fucking him through your clothes. His hands have to come to your hips, gripping painfully for your eyes to snap open and your hips to freeze. 

Your eyes widen further when you finally process the situation, and even in all your teasing and sensuality, at the end of the day, you’re still just a virgin. You never had any real intention of acting on your desires, especially if Joel wasn’t the one initiating. 

Oh fuck. What did I do? What do I do? He’s just staring at me… Maybe he didn’t notice, I didn’t! But it felt so good. Will he let me? Maybe if I—

Your hips tilt into his before you can process whether this is actually a good idea or not. His hand tense over yours, like another shock of clarity through your bones. You shut your eyes tight, not wanting to see the disgust or uncomfortable pity in his face. “I’m so sorry, Joel. I didn’t… I-”

You try not to let tears well in your eyes as you whimper and pull back from him. But he doesn’t let you. His arms tense, his muscles flexing as he keeps your body pressed against his. You open your eyes, a bit shocked at his refusal to let you go but still too scared to meet his eyes. Your gaze is on his stomach, the way his gray shirt rode up, exposing the way his belly keeps tensing with every breath. “I-” He manages to get out before letting out a shuddering sigh. You finally look at him. 

His eyebrows are pulled taut in between his eyes, his gaze is something you’ve never seen before, and he almost looks angry. It’s desperate, but sorrowful, with the added haze from his intoxication. He keeps biting at his bottom lip, worrying it red as he tries to form a sentence for you. His hands tense over your hips again but this time they tilt you into him again. His face is a hard grimace as he slowly presses you into his raging bulge. You watch him fight with his expression, it keeps breaking into something weak before he goes back to his angry pout. You can’t help the way you press into him, you want to feel it again, that fire in the pit of your stomach that spreads to your soaking pussy the more he pulls you in. You watch his face contort into something heavenly. His brows pull up, almost shocked at how good you feel as his eyes roll back and shut. His entire body shakes as he melts into the pillow. He’s breathing deep and slowly, trying to regulate the pleasure he feels. 

Now he’s focused on savoring the moment. He wants this to last as long as it possibly can. You’re making him feel incredible,  he’s so sensitive, it’s like he’s been edging himself for you. You whimper, high-pitched and muffled but it’s so beautiful that he forces his eyes open. You have one hand gripping the bedsheet like it’s your lifeline and you have the other bitten between your teeth to hold your sounds in. Your hips are grinding into him at an uneven, unsteady, desperate pace and he’s mesmerized by the sight.

He knew you wanted him. He didn’t know you needed him. You’re fucking yourself against his cock like you’ve been waiting for it your whole life. Your hand comes up to grip his shoulder instead of the bedsheet. He grunts and tilts his hips further into yours, a sadistic smirk coming to his face at the sound of exclamation that shoots from your mouth once you’re able to grind your clit against his shaft. Your thrusts start to stutter at that, your body constantly wanting to fold in on itself from the assault of pleasure but you try and will yourself to keep going. 

Unfortunately, your pace is ruined by your pleasure. Your sensitive body can’t handle how good his clothed cock is making you feel. You lose your pace and your pleasure becomes rocky and teasing. He watches as your face changes from pleasured to pouty. Little whimpers and whines of frustration slip from your lips, growing in volume and frequency the longer you’re unable to grind against him properly. Joel’s watching you through hooded eyes, fingers digging into your hips painfully at this point and all he wants is to not cum yet. He wants to make you cum first, he needs it, he needs to see it, to hear it. 

He’s been telling himself it’s fine because you’re grinding against him, not the other way around. You’re choosing this, there’s no way he’s manipulating you, or swaying your decision if he stays completely indifferent. But you’re begging him now. You’re gripping desperately at his shirt, removing your hand from your mouth to grip him harder and pulling yourself closer, wrapping your arms around and moaning right against his chest. He shouldn’t. He can’t. But he does.

His eyes shut tight as his hands leave your hips. You almost climb on top of him in protest, whining a loud “N- Please.” into his chest as your leg hikes higher onto his waist. One of his hands cradles your head, pulling you further into his chest, muffling the moans you’re already letting out at his touch. His other hand goes to the small of your back, pressing you against him perfectly and guiding your rhythm as your hips start up again. He dares to speak. “S’this okay, baby?”

Your reaction to his voice is visceral. Your hands shoot up to his shoulder and hair, pulling yourself up a bit to bury in his neck, getting a new angle from his cock, now fucking him against your leaking hole. “So good, Joey. Thank- Thank you s’much. Thank you, thank you.” Your gratitude is like a searing knife through him. His entire body is set alight as he tries to regulate his breathing. He can feel goosebumps break out on his skin, his pleasure filling every molecule in his body, ready to overflow for you. Fuck. He’s definitely going to cum before you. 

“Mm. Good, good girl. Just- Keep going, sweetness, take what— Shit. Take what you need, darlin’.” His breathing quickens and shudders as your hips increase their pace against him. He’s leaking continuously now, he’s getting in his head, trying to stop himself from cumming but every thought that pops into his mind just brings him closer to the edge. He can’t focus on anything but you. You’re moaning for him, grinding against him, this desperate for him. 

The hand on your lower back migrates to the back of your neck, gripping you there, holding you in place as his hips begin to thrust into yours. “M’gonna cum, darlin’. Fuck, I wanted t- wanted to last for y- Mmm oh fuck.” His entire body starts to tremble as your nails dig into him so painfully he’s sure they drew blood. Your eyes are comically wide as your body tenses in his hold before breaking down into a shudder that overtakes your entire being. You’re cumming. 

He explodes at the realization. In all his desperation, intoxication, and pure need… He was still able to make you cum first. He buries his face in your hair, huffing the scent as he floods his sweatpants. His eyes shut as tightly as they can as his orgasm tears through him. He’s been waiting so long for you to make him cum and now that it’s happening, it feels even better than he planned for. His low grunts turn into shocked moans when his orgasm doesn’t stop after shooting two ropes of cum against his sweats. You’re already coming down as he hits what feels like his second peak. You can feel his hands shaking over where they’re gripping you and you get an impulse that you act on without a second thought. 

Your hand slides down from his shoulder quickly, over the sliver of stomach he’s showing off, and right down his pants. You don’t know what you’re doing so you just grip him, wrapping your hand around his shaft but it seems to do the trick. He lets out a sound that resembles someone getting kicked in the gut. His face is pulled from your hair as his head is thrown back. He arches into you a bit before his hips start thrusting into your fist, desperately prolonging his already overwhelming orgasm. It’s embarrassing; how long he was cumming for, the way his body was violently quivering for you, the ludicrously large dark spot spreading over his pants, showcasing how much he came for you. 

He moans gently when he comes to. You’re stroking over his chest with a soft, sleepy, nervous smile. He pulls you in for a kiss before he can think about it. You guys haven’t discussed anything. Neither of you knows what this means for your relationship but you know that neither of you has felt more comfortable than when you’re in the arms of the other. So why question it now? 

You fall into a deep sleep listening to Joel’s heavy snores, getting rocked to bed by the way his chest expands. It’s the best sleep of your life. 

thank you so much for reading!! please please please give any feedback you may have! I want it all! also if you liked it please take a look at my masterlist!

psst psst. hey you!! i have a part 2 if u want 😏

[binnieceo]

Hello, kind strangers on the internet!

Oh, wow! Discord drama, huh? I never thought I'd be in the center of it all. Well, since she has shared her side of the story, it's only fair that I share mine.

So, if you aren't chronically online, allow me to explain: A teenager by the name of Tori (or Six) is accusing me of grooming her which is SO far from the truth that it is not even in the same plane of existence as the truth to begin with.

Some screenshots have been lost to time and I only have word of mouth to back me up, so you guys will have to just believe my (and others') words.

"Why?"

I don't screenshot every person and conversation I have. Tori keeps changing her profile, aliases, etc, so the things she's said and done a year ago have been lost.

Certain servers were deleted. Most of the bad stuff Tori said was on a server I made (which I will get into later) that was also later deleted. I only have a few screenshots from the server and most of them are EXTREMELY pixelated and low quality, so I'm sorry about that.

Most of our interactions pre-discord were on Twitter. And not only was Twitter banned in my country, but both me and Tori deleted our accounts.

"Why did you delete your twitter??? Are you sus??"

No actually. I was just getting bombarded with negativity from Twitter so I deleted my acc for the sake of my mental health. Tori wiped her Twitter (idk how? maybe she used bots) because she said she wanted to repurpose her account into a study account, which is fine.

Okay, so, starting:

First things first, I was 17 when I first met Tori back in April 2023. But I think I was 16 when we first interacted, because I have memory of interacting with her in the HJ server before I had my birthday.

She proceeded to DM me on Discord and I scrolled through all our convos and there really isn't anything worth noting there. We didn't talk much in DMs at all. There is just friendly talks about how our day went and how much we appreciated each other, so I'm not gonna put any of those here, because they are irrelevant.

Tori, at the time, asked me to DM a friend of hers (who was in the HJ server) and tell her that she wanted to end the friendship. I was confused but also didn't know how to say "no" at the time, so I just did what she asked and she seemed happy.

At some point, we started talking about fanfiction. We didn't talk about anything bad, just how much Tori liked my work and enjoyed being my friend. Later, she gave me her Twitter @ and that was the first time I saw her posting about NSFW.

She re-tweeted and followed NUMEROUS NSFW artists/fanfic writers (mostly Tower of God and Kimetsu no Yaiba) and made her own posts talking about it, mostly about just how much she wanted to rape Gyuu (a KNY character). Again, I literally don't have access to Twitter anymore + Tori WIPED her account, so even if you follow her, you won't be able to find anything like this there.

I didn't think too much of this at the time. It was just fanfiction, nothing more, nothing less. And yeah did she tell me she was 17 and not 18? Yeah but like. Teenagers are going to teenage and interact with porn anyway so I was like "this is fine" (it wasn't)

Then, at some point, someone in the HJ server brought up that they were 13 and I promptly banned them (the rules state that those below 16 cannot join). Which prompted Tori to send me the above message.

And this is where I made a grave mistake: I kept talking to her despite it all.

To be completely honest, I was feeling extremely awkward and confused when she first sent me that message, and just wanted to calm her down because I had the impression she was really shaken up by what happened.

"But why did you keep talking to her??"

I kept talking to her out of pity. She often vented to me and the others about how bad her life IRL was, how her friends irl treated her badly and how much she hated it all. I felt like I owed her my friendship because I was the one who messaged her ex-friend some time earlier, making her feel alone. So, I kept talking to her.

I'd also like to note that those were some of the last few messages we exchanged in DMs (the last were something abt Evangelion? I don't know what Evangelion is but she seemed obsessed with it at the time.)

Some time after this, me and Tori met my two best friends (whose names I edited out of the screenshots) and interacted on Twitter before moving to Discord (because Twitter DMs suck and Elon is a bitch)

And that Group Chat on Discord is where all of her screenshots come from. However, differently from what she made others believe, me and Tori didn't actually interact too much in that GC at all, and when we did, it was to talk about our lives/funny memes/Hand Jumper.

This is mostly due to time zone restraints. Tori studied in the morning/afternoon while I was at work, and when night fell (when she was active) I was in school and only came back home during midnight.

Did I talk about NSFW in the GC? Yeah, but Tori wasn't present when me and the others were talking about it, and she never replied or interacted with those messages so I never thought she even saw them. I was even surprised she took screenshots of our convos at all jhds

And also despite what she makes it look like, we didn't talk JUST about NSFW in the group chat, and I also never instigated them to talk about it. I actually had to scroll a LOT to find the conversations Tori mentioned. There are actually very few and far between who are buried below normal conversations and vents about our lives and interests.

The ones who usually started the NSFW convos were my two besties and Tori (when I was offline). Tori actually liked to send NSFW Tower of God (webtoon) fanfictions in the middle of normal conversations just to make the others acknowledge and talk about it.

She also makes fun of me for asking for help with my smut fanfics, but Tori also asked US for help with her own TOG rapefic (I think it involved a blue haired boy and his uncle?) because she also wrote NSFW (and especially fic-threads on Twitter). I remember she sent me the google docs she wrote the rapefic on but I don't have access to it anymore because I don't save other people's google docs.

And now you might say:

"Wait! You are a proshipper?! You just lost all of your credibility!"

And to that I say: Yeah, I am a proshipper. Proshipper just means I don't tell people to kill themselves or harass them if they like a ship I don't. That's literally it.

And even if you still hate me for using that word and decides to side with Tori because of it, just know that she also calls herself a proshipper (she used to have this on her discord bio as well, but deleted it. This only exists in her tiktok now.) and STILL talks about/interacts with rapefics/incest fics. I'm inclined to believe that she also writes Dead Dove fics but publishes them under a different alias, but that's just speculation.

So like, yeah. If you hate me for being a proshipper just know she is one too so like we're on equal ground here lmao.

Well, continuing.

At some point, Tori sent a long message in our group chat (screenshot below) saying she didn't feel comfortable talking about NSFW with us.

And you know what I did?

I... respected her boundaries.

(I edited the pictures together because of Tumblr's image limit. I hope you can read them. If it is too pixelated I'll just reblog the post with the standalone pictures)

She didn't want to talk about NSFW/Dead Doves with us? That's okay. I understood that. It was also around that time I finally started coming to my senses and realized that it didn't matter if I had any good or bad intentions towards Tori, me talking about those things with her in the first place was a bad thing, and I shouldn't have done it.

Tori said she didn't want to lose our friendship or leave on bad terms, so I asked the other girls to censor all of their mature messages (not only NSFW stuff, but also just bad/sad stuff/news from irl news sources) so she could talk to us without being exposed to any type of bad things (because she was also venting a LOT to us at the time and said she wanted to forget the real world for a moment.)

I also made a Discord server with just me, Tori, and our two friends. The server doesn't exist anymore, as my friend deleted it, but I basically divided the server into two sections so we could talk about anything we wanted as a group without bothering/triggering Tori.

But...It was also in that server that Tori started saying extremely concerning things.

Not only did she become progressively mean with time, but she also said she and her sister PROUDLY doxxed someone, and she was RACIST towards my friend, saying that she, a (probably) white person had the RIGHT to call my friend the N word because she wasn't (in her words, not mine) "actually black". Just for context, this friend is BLASIAN (black and asian) so she was being racist AND xenophobic at the SAME TIME. (Sadly, neither me or said friend have the screenshots to prove it, only the memory of it. But all 3 of us can back this up because we saw the conversation happening.)

She also, somehow, found out the school address of another one of my friends AND their ZIP Code, and sent a google streetview picture of said friend's school saying that she didn't live "too far away" which scared the shit out of me and the other girls.

I hope you can see the screenshots properly. I wasn't the one who took them, so they are pixelated.

Those are the screenshots where Tori says she doxxed someone, and tried to guilt trip my friend into giving her their address so she could doxx them too.

Screenshots of me and my friends talking about the situation, and about the fact Tori kept on posting NSFW on her (then) TikTok account and talked about it to her other friends who were probably younger than her.

Screenshots of Tori being mean to me and my friends out of nowhere and for no reason. (The blue line was an unrelated message I deleted for the sake of space)

And, well, Tori being racist to our friend was the final straw. Sure maybe she was exagerating/lying about the doxx thing but we couldn't accept her being racist. So, I, Aline, ghosted Tori, which angered her quite a lot.

But instead of deleting the server, I just left it with Tori and my two friends in it (which was a dumb mistake). My two friends were left with this teenager they didn't like and were AFRAID OF while she stalked both me and them. I don't know what her objective was with all this but if she wanted to scare us, well then she did.

Our friends were so scared of her that they were afraid of cutting off their friendship normally. One of them even told me they were afraid Tori would doxx her if she unfriended her, and we were all looking for ways to get this girl out of our life so we could be in peace once and for all.

However, Tori used to LEAK Sleepacross' Patreon.

And why is this important? Well, because she once sent a google drive link with said patreon images to us once (I wasn't online at the time (it was late at night and I was in school) so I didn't see it) but her drive was e-mail locked. So basically, she had to approve which e-mail would be able to see the contents of her drive.

And this is how she was able to get a hold of my friends' personal e-mails. She could've very well deleted them from the drive's history but she KEPT THEM SAVED and used them to STALK and HARASS my two friends once they blocked her.

And after my friends blocked her e-mail address, Tori started STALKING AND HARASSING my OTHER friends, block evading and asking them to message me about why we left her.

Above are screenshots about the entire e-mail situation, as well as a the very e-mail Tori sent my friends and the conversation I had with the friend who received Tori's messages.

Tori said she didn't want to be my hater but she didn't know why I blocked her. And well, the answer is simple: Tori is transphobic (more on that below) Racist, xenophobic, ableist, Doxxed at least TWO people and is PROUD of it, found out where our friends lived and THREATENED TO DOXX THEM if they ever got on her bad side.

So like, aside from the fact we shouldn't even have talked in the first place, we were just scared that this TEENAGER would doxx us online and do something bad to us.

And also, remember when Tori said she didn't like NSFW or Hand Jumper anymore? Well, turns out she was lying. Because not only does she still post about Hand Jumper, she uses pictures from the webtoon to say the most CRUDE AND AWFUL THINGS I've EVER seen someone say.

Above are screenshots of Tori being ableist and transphobic (this was back when the olympics were going on and she sided against the woman who was suffering transphobia without even being trans at all)

And remember when Tori nearly used the N word against a black person? Well it seems she isn't above using slurs at all because she (a cisgender girl) called a trans person a slur with no remorse and with no reason. (Just Tori suddenly turning on her friends and being mean for no reason, i guess.)

Yesterday Tori got her friends together and started calling me names and making threats against my life. And I don't care whether they are just joking and being teenagers or not, but what they are saying is extremely problematic, especially because I know some of the people in that server are adults as well and should know better

I personally don't care about their threats and what ill they have to say about me. Let them speak, I don't care. Nothing these children ever say about me will be worse than the things I have to live with on a day-to-day basis, so like yeah keep talking. Your words can't reach me.

However, I am still making this post anyway. And you may say:

"Woah Aline, but aside from Tori's server and friend group this situation was private! Why are you exposing this at all?"

That's simple. Because Tori decided to include my friends into all of this. She can hate me all she want, send me death threats and suicide bait me all day, but if she has something against me, then she should keep it between me and her only. NOT the other girls.

She sent them all screenshots of our group chat (which were the few times we even spoke about NSFW) and didn't even censor my friends' names, and is trying to get her friends to rally against them, even if they literally didn't do anything wrong.

And I'm so sorry but. If I REALLY was the bad person Tori is making me out to be, surely she wouldn't go out of her way to block evade, stalk and harass my friends to get back into contact, with me, right?

If I really was bad, then she would've thanked GOD that I left her life, but she didn't. She always found a way to stalk both me and the other girls. And it's clear from her message to my other friend (screenshots above) that she was clearly mad and upset that we left her, and this all culminated in her talking shit about me and giving people that never even interacted with me before the wrong idea.

ALL my friends, not just the ones who were originally part of our gc, are afraid of her simply because they INTERACTED with her in the past. They are afraid she will doxx them or get her friends to attack them.

And the thing that made me write this post at all is because my best friend is scared for her life and feeling extremely suicidal because of this teenager who just doesn't know how to get my name out of her mouth.

My friends have been suffering with terrible anxiety and paranoia all because of Tori. Afraid of her and her little friend group, afraid of being doxxed and attacked online. They are afraid of interacting with the Hand Jumper fandom altogether because Tori is seen as some sort of "celebrity" and her word is law, especially because since she is a minor, people will always side with her no matter what.

So I made this post to finally pull off the bandaid and put the spotlight on myself, not the other girls.

Yes, it was my fault for keeping a friendship out of pity and not love. I was wrong for talking about NSFW near/with Tori. It didn't matter if I was also a minor at the time, I was still older and should have known better. It was wrong of me to do so despite me not having bad intentions. Sure yeah my existence (or lack thereof) in Tori's life would not have changed whether or not she interacted/wrote NSFW things before the right time, but I shouldn't have interacted with her regardless. Sadly, I was naive then. I was wrong, and I apologize. Not to the strangers who are reading this, but to Tori, who I shouldn't even have been friends with in the first place.

And to Tori, this message is for you once someone sends you this post:

Despite everything you did, despite all the horrid things you've said about me, all the death threats and harm you've commited to me and my friends, I want you to know that I don't wish any harm upon you.

I'm sorry for ghosting you instead of sending you a proper goodbye. You must have felt very confused, especially because the others left you soon after. For that I am also guilty.

But I also acknowledge the fact that you know that you are wrong, and that you know your age doesn't make you innocent, but you still bring it up as a defense regardless because you know people will side with you no matter what you've done.

Was I in the wrong for talking about NSFW around you? Yeah.

But you were also wrong for saying slurs, for being racist, for doxxing someone and threatening to doxx your friends if they ever left you. You were wrong to leak the patreon and for making a harassment campaign against me. I know I was wrong too but doxxing, stalking, racism and harassment are also crimes in the USA.

You were transphobic on your Tiktok, said an absurdly ableist statement that I still cannot believe is real, and even without me in your life, you interacted/still interacts with NSFW posts both on Tiktok and AO3 (and I don't doubt you do so on Twitter as well, but I can't log on the website). So while you and your friends can call me disgusting for liking porn and dead doves, you are not all that different from me and you know that.

And I know you know that doxxing, racism, transphobia and ableism is worse than any fanfiction either I or you could have written, but you can't accept that.

You are probably what? 15 now? You aren't 8 years old. You are not a child. You know the weight of your words and yet you decide to speak them anyway because you think the word "minor" will get you a "get out of jail free card", but that only works for so long.

...

So, yeah. That's it. This is the post. I was wrong but Tori is also no saint. And if you are her friend and you are reading this, I think it's better you reconsider your choices before she starts harassing you, too.

And if you are a bystander and want to cuss me out, then sure, go forth. Shit on me for calling myself a proshipper, shit on me for doing something I knew was wrong, call me a freak and block me I DON'T CARE.

Just leave my girls out of this, because they are not guilty of anything. They just befriended the wrong person who had all the wrong intentions. Any hate and harassment should come to me and NOT them.

That's all I have to say.

I hope september treats you with kindness, and that everyone stays safe out there.

(Below are just a few screenshots of me and my friends talking about the situation, both during and after this entire debacle. I didn't have a place to put them in on the original post.)

[enposter]

++ ENHYPEN's HYUNG LINE HAVING A CRUSH ON ANOTHER IDOL °.+*

pairing: idol!enhypen hyung line x idol!reader

warnings: none as i know of. maybe mention of getting stuck in an elevator, food mention

a/n: i didnt rlly know what to name this reaction this was the best i came up w 🥸 also im sorry hee and jays r much shorter i will make them longer next time

reblogs and feedback are greatly appreciated <3

navigation.

lee heeseung — 이희승

i have a huge Huge feeling dude would Not know what to do 😭

esp if ur under hybe as well??? He would always see u in the hallways and would be so starstruck by ur beauty every single time so would you

poor baby would be too shy to start up a conversation with you and would end up longing from afar :(

BUT!!! you guys got stuck in an elevator together. while its not the most ideal situation to be in.

He!! Lee Heeseung!! had the chance to talk to you!!!!!

he was So gonna rub this in ni-ki's face bc little shit said he was never gonna balls up and start a convo 😒

and start a conversation he did

you guys ending up hitting it off and exchanged numbers <3

talking whenever and eating lunch together when you both can <3

imagine learning each others dances together :(( AFFGH

SINGING EACH OTHERS SONGS AAHHHH

the hybe family games together agshdjsjcj

after the hybe family games u guys are one of the cutest friendships in kpop and everyone loves you so much

sunghoon owes jake 10 bucks now since hee talked to you

park jongseong — 박종성

jay really just Screams friends to lovers to me it makes so much sense

you guys have been friends ever since you met at inkigayooo.

sunoo actually gave you a sandwich cause he was a huge fan of ur group wanting to be friends pleek TT

ANYWAYS,,, ur group and enha became close, seeing as you debuted around the same time and were all around the same age.

jay fell for you so easily, your humor and personality were charming, inviting. everything about you was perfect to him.

honestly you never really knew jay liked you because you thought he treated you like everybody else???

THAT IS !!!! until you heard the jakehoon talking abt it

you went complete 🚨🚨🚨 /pos maybe like 🚨😮🥰🚨

YOU NEEDED TO KNOW IF THIS WAS SERIOUS??? obviously who wouldnt need to know if jay liked them???

you never thought of him in that way. but it just felt so right when you did

you didnt wanna push so you just sat not so calmy with this newfound information until you couldnt hold it in anymore.

safe to say, you two are partners and so are happy <3

sim jaeyun — 심재윤

jakey jakey jakey jakeyyy

your group had debuted before enha and niki was a huge fan because WOW?? UR DANCING SKILLS?? out of this WORLD

niki soon introduced ur group to sunoo, sunoo introduced it to jake and jake introduced it so Everybody.

he was just so captivated by you. ur vibe everything about you was just so interesting to him.

he spent the first whole night he learnt abt ur group binging video and compilations of you.

jakey was a hardcore fanboy now

everything was fine and he was fanboying alone until you both were promoting at the same time

poor puppy was a Mess.

remember how he was looking at the wall instead of wony? yeah thats him but 2007382 worse because his ears are so red from looking at you One time.

but somehow !! someway !! he mustered up the courage to talk to you

cue kissin u by miranda cosgrove sparks fly its like electricity i might die when i forget how to breathe you get closer and theres nowhere in this world id rather be

you thought he was so cute because he was so sweet and shy talking to you. and you!! YOU!!! gave him!! your number🥰

jakey would send you dog videos any chance and if ur a cat person he'd send cute cat videos too but mostly dogs aka layla

itd be kinda hard to hangout since ur in different companies but you guys facetimed any chance you could get

AGGH i love sim jake so much i might cry

and

"baby did you know that i was a huge fan of you and ur group! :D thats why i came and talked to you"

"i know jakey" "HOW????" "riki told me"

absolute betrayal noises he'd be so dramatic goodness

park sunghoon — 박성훈

i feel like he first saw you at music bank since he was an mc

your group was promoting ur new cute concept mini album and goodness

you were just. So. Cute.

absolutely melted but kept quite composed yk how it is professional things

hoon would talk abt u all the time but would Not make a move toward actually talking to you. smh

our wonyoung and enha were actually the ones who pushed him to Say Something

so one day on ur groups last day of promoting wony gave sunghoon a stern look and Bro Booked it trying to find you

he was looking around, out of breath from running and didnt even notice that he bumped into and knocked you over

was so extremely flustered

he did help you up tho like the gentleman he is <3

apologized profusely would not stop until he literally made you push him over also 😭

you just tapped him cause ??? why would you push him over pls

you guys did not exchange numbers cause hoon was too flustered to do anything and bowed and walked into a wall away

you guys will be pushed together again one day i promise you

You just have to ask for his number next time <:]

enposter @ tumblr | 2022

[vbecker10]

On to my second request!

Pairing: Loki x Fem!Reader

Scene: One way or another, Loki is now part of the Avengers. Y/N isn't an agent at S.H.I.E.L.D., she works an ordinary job ( i.e. architect, consultant, or sales rep...etc.) but is friends/related to some agents.

Request: Y/N is set up on a fancy blind date to meet up with an agent her friend said was a perfect match for her and Loki is undercover for an intel gathering mission and needs a partner to look less suspicious. He's not her usual type, but she trusts her friend and decides to see it through. Could you please write about the two going through the blind date, she not realizing he is the wrong person until the end of the night. I'll leave the ending of whether or not they actuality end up dating or just stay friends up to you!

The Blind Date? (Part 1 of 4)

Part 2 | Part 3 & 4 in progress

Pairing: Loki x female reader

Warnings: none...? Loki annoying Thor, a vague history of terrible dates, mentions of mob activity (I guess)... idk I'm hoping for a bit funny at first then fluff in the second or third part

Summary: Your friend sets you up on a blind date with someone she works with at SHIELD but you accidentally end up on a mission with Loki

POV: This goes back and forth between Y/N's perspective and Loki's (and if you don't like how I call it Y/N POV and Loki POV... I don't care lol we've all had this convo before and you know damn well what I mean so here goes)

A/N: @soubi001 I love this idea!! I really hope you like this, I'm so sorry it took such a long time and I'm sorry it seems to be getting really long so I'm making it a few parts 💚 thanks for listening to me ramble about this one @michelleleewise

Word Count:

Dividers by: @harlequin-hangout

(Y/N POV)

"Oh come on, it'll be fun," Michelle urges but you shake your head then hide behind the flimsy plastic menu. "Don't you trust me?" she asks with a wide smile as she reaches across your other friend to tap on the back of your menu.

"Not even a little," you reply slowly in a serious tone.

She scoffs dramatically, leaning back in her chair as she holds her hand over her heart, "Wow Y/N, that really hurts." You stifle a laugh as she turns her attention to the woman sitting between you at the bar, "Can you believe her Jess?"

"Well... you don't exactly have a good track record with setting her up on blind dates," Jess answers, putting her menu down. Michelle rolls her eyes and she continues, "I mean, let's be honest, the last few guys you set her up with were-"

"Horrible," you finish her sentence, looking up from your menu.

"I was going to say not great, but horrible works," Jess agrees with a nod.

"Ugh," Michelle groans, clearly annoyed Jess sided with you on the subject. "Ok, so maybe there were a few duds here and there-"

"A few?" you ask quickly.

"I'll admit, Mark was definitely a jerk... and I guess I should have known Danny wouldn't be your type but they weren't all that bad. You have to give me some credit," Michelle says, not giving up.

"Let's see... Fred was an hour late with literally no excuse then he got annoyed when I didn't want to go to his place after. Kevin brought his cat to the restaurant in a backpack and talked to Mr. Pickles more than me. Derek kept eating off of my plate without asking and he took my leftovers. Toby was into all these weird conspiracy theories and thought Australia wasn't a real place-" you count each person on your fingers as Jess laughs hysterically at your string of terrible blind dates.

"I get it!" she practically yells, cutting you off before you can continue. "But seriously, this guy really is perfect for you. I promise."

"No. Absolutely not," you tell her, crossing your arms as you lean back in your chair. "You've set me up with enough weirdos. I'm not doing it."

"Just this last one," she pleads. "And if it doesn't work out, I'll never set you up with anyone ever again. Jess can be your witness."

You sigh and rub your eyes. "I'm not getting out of this am I?" you ask Jess.

She looks over at Michelle before answering than shakes her head, "Nope, doesn't look like it." She then adds, "Better you than me."

"Thanks," you say sarcastically. You can practically feel Michelle buzzing with nervous energy as you try to think of a way to avoid what is almost guaranteed to be another terrible blind date. After a few moments of silence you breath deeply then throw your hands up in defeat. "Fine... tell me what's so amazing about this guy," you tell her.

"Ok ok ok, so..." Michelle starts excitedly. "He's new to the city, he just moved here with his older brother a couple of months ago. He keeps to himself so he hasn't really made friends with anyone at work," she explains.

"Oh good, so he's anti-social," Jess comments and you can't hold back a laugh.

"What? No," she says then glares at Jess, "You're not helping."

"I wasn't trying to help," your friend smirks.

Michelle groans and looks directly at you, "Ignore her. He's not anti-social, I think he's just a bit on the quiet side. He reads a ton so you guys have that in common."

Jess interrupts again, "Unless he's into smut about fantasy characters I doubt they've read any of the same books recently."

"I read other stuff too," you respond, hitting her shoulder lightly but she raises an eyebrow at you.

"Can I continue?" Michelle asks and you both nod. "So he's super tall and he has a really sexy accent."

"Now those are two things you can definitely build a lasting relationship on," Jess comments and you cover your mouth with your hand to quiet your laughter.

Michelle clears her throat loudly and Jess avoids making eye contact with her. "Do I need to remind you that you are only engaged to Sebastian because I set you two up on a blind date two years ago?" Michelle asks Jess.

"No..." she answers sheepishly. "I'll be quiet."

"Good, now as I was saying..." Michelle's tone becomes excited again. "You're going to love him. Trust me."

You bite your lip then say, "Ok, I trust you. But if he's not totally amazing..."

"I'll never set you up with anyone ever again," she agrees to your terms with a smile. "I'll talk to him Monday at work to set it up."

(LOKI POV)

"Ah, there you are, brother," Thor's loud voice echoes through the small library. You sigh deeply, setting your tea on the small table next to you. You mutter a greeting in response but don't look up from your book as you turn the page. "What are you reading?" he asks as he settles into one of the leather chairs across from you.

"A book," you reply, "You have heard of those I assume."

"You know that is not what I meant," he says, you can't help but smirk in response to his annoyed tone. After a brief pause, you finally tell him the title of your book and he nods although you know he has never heard of it.

You continue to read, assuming he will grow tired of you ignoring him but after several minutes your curiosity gets the better of you. "Is there something you need brother, or did you truly come to the library to watch me read?" you ask, your eyes still fixed to your book.

"Peter told me you asked him to delete the dating profile he had set up for you," he says.

"I did," you confirm as you turn the page again. "I do not see how this is any concern of yours."

"You only had it for a week," he states.

"That was six days longer than I required it," you reply.

"Did you match with someone that quickly?" he asks in surprise.

You shrug, you hadn't opened the app once after the boy had installed it for you, "No and I doubt I would have. I do not need a computer to solve a problem I do not have."

He sighs, "Loki, you cannot spend all of your free time alone, hiding in the library."

"I am not hiding," you look up finally, closing your book. "And I do not spend all of my free time here, sometimes I read in the park or my room."

He puts his hand over his face and groans. "You know we are going to be on Midgard for the foreseeable future, brother," he reminds you unnecessarily. "It is not good for you to be alone all of the time. How about I ask Jane if she knows anyone you could spend time with? We could even go on a double date, that might be fun."

"As thrilling as that sounds," you say as you roll your eyes. "I am perfectly fine alone. Thank you for your concern, now if you wouldn't mind," you open your book again and wave your hand towards the door.

Before he can respond, the door to the library opens and a SHIELD agent with a tablet enters. She only takes a few steps inside and says, "Captain Rogers needs you to report to the briefing room in fifteen minutes."

You smile to yourself, hoping this new mission will occupy your brother for at least a few days. Thor rubs his hands together and stands up but the agent shakes her head. Thor pauses and she says, "Oh, actually... it looks like this mission is for Loki. Sorry Thor, maybe next time."

You chuckle at the obvious disappointment on his face as you stand up, your book vanishing into your pocket dimension with a flick of your wrist. "Well brother, it looks as though this uninteresting little chat of ours will have to wait until I return," you smirk as you walk past him.

(LOKI POV)

"Ok team," Stark says when everyone has taken their seats at the large oval table. "This is going to be strictly a recon mission. As most of you know the Sokovian mob has begun opening a large number of restaurants in Manhattan, Philadelphia and Boston. It's been confirmed that the majority of these establishments are being used as fronts for illegal gambling tournaments, money laundering and other criminal activities."

"Such a waste, cause the food is supposed to be really good," Barton says in a joking tone.

Natasha laughs while Rogers crosses his arms and gives Barton a disapproving look. Stark ignores the comment and continues, "Up until now we have been letting state and local law enforcement handle the mob as they normally would but there's been a new development that puts them on our radar. We just received intel that there is going to be a meeting between several members of the Sokovian mob family and two high ranking members of Hydra."

"That can't be anything good," Natasha says. "Does the intel give any details about what they might be meeting about?"

"No," Rogers answers. "That's why we need you and Laufeyson to go undercover as a couple on a date, so you can record their conversation." He opens a small metal case and continues, "You will also need to plant these four listening devices in various locations in the restaurant. Hill has mapped them out for you." You open the folder in front of you again, flipping to the floor plan of the restaurant. Hill added several notes and suggested locations for the devices.

"Since the goal of this mission is to plant the bugs, record their meeting and then get out without being noticed you'll both need to alter your appearance," Hill says to you and Natasha.

You stand up confidently, "That shouldn't be an issue." You hold your arms out slightly at your sides as a green glow surrounds you in a flash. "What do you think?" you ask, running your fingers through your unruly blonde curls. You adjust your dark rimmed glasses then roll up the sleeves on your deep blue sweater.

"Yea..." Stark says. "I'm not sure the professor look is quiet what we were talking about. You're still-"

"Incredibly handsome," you smirk.

"I was going to say tall," he rolls his eyes. "You only changed your hair and added glasses, you still look like you. Try becoming someone no one will notice."

"Ah, yes. One moment," you say then with a second flash of green your appearance changes again.

"Oh come on," Rogers says loudly. He throws his hands up and turns away from you then back quickly.

You look down at yourself and chuckle, you can't remember the last time you were this small. You crane your neck to look up at the Captain who is now almost a foot taller then you.

"What kind of game is this Laufeyson?" he asks.

You feign innocence, "I was merely following Stark's suggestion. I imagine very few people would turn their heads if I walked by as you, the pre-serum version of course."

Natasha and Barton try to contain their laughter while Stark steps between you and Rogers. "Very funny," he says sarcastically. "You get one more chance..." he warns and you nod, clearing your throat as a green glow surrounds you again.

"That's more like it," Hill says and Stark nods in agreement. You shrug, unimpressed with your current form. You reduced your usual height by nearly six inches, changed your hair color to light brown and shortened the length. Your features are different as well, your eyes becoming a dark brown, ensuring that you are completely unrecognizable.

"May I ask, what are your plans?" you turn your attention to the spy.

She smiles and takes a small device out of a pocket on her belt, placing it behind her ear. She taps the device and her face changes right before your eyes. "Its a Photostatic Veil, or Nano Mask depending on who you ask. They are nano-sized holographic cells that can change a person's features and even their voice," she explains in a flawless British accent.

"Impressive," you say with a slight nod as she turns it off. After an hour of discussing the minor details of the mission, you finally head back to your room to finish your book in peace.

(Y/N POV)

You close the door to your apartment and kick off your shoes then you walk quickly into your kitchen to set your grocery bags on the counter. You reach into your pocket and answer your phone.

"Hi Y/N," the voice on the other end greets you happily.

"Hey Michelle," you reply. You hold the phone against your ear with your shoulder as you begin to unload the groceries. "How's it going?"

"Fantastic," she says and you can tell by her voice that the date is on. "So... I talked to him at lunch today and he is definitely looking forward to seeing you this weekend."

"Great," you tell her, trying to sound enthusiastic. Maybe this wouldn't be a complete disaster like all the others, you think hopefully.

"He said he wants to try one of those new Sokovian restaurants," Michelle says. "I hear the food is amazing."

You laugh, "Me too. They seem to be all over the city all of a sudden."

"Perfect, so it's all set. This Saturday at 7, on the corner of 3rd Avenue and East 6th street," she says, pausing for a moment before adding, "Write it down, so you don't forget."

"I'm not going to forget," you mumble as you roll your eyes.

"I can practically hear you rolling your eyes at me. Look, we both know you have the memory of a goldfish. Write it down," she jokes but you know better then to argue with her.

You grab a pad and pen from one of the drawers in your kitchen and write down the time and address. "There, I made a note," you tell her. You tear off the piece of paper dramatically so she can hear it over the phone then stick it to your fridge with a magnet.

"Good," she laughs.

"So..." you pause. "Does the mystery man have a name?"

"He does," she answers.

"Do I have to guess it?" you ask.

"I'm not telling you," she says, "The last time I told you a guys name before a date, you googled him so much you could have written his biography."

"That's fair, I guess," you admit.

"Oh, I've got to go," she says, you can hear her dogs barking in the background. "I'll text you later."

"Ok, bye," you say just before she hangs up. You put the last of the items in the fridge and check your note.

(LOKI POV)

"Since Natasha got called away for a mission with Thor, you're going to need to find someone in the restaurant to use as cover. You'll be far less noticeable if you aren't sitting at the bar alone for hours. If you can, get a table as close to the targets as possible," Rogers instructs you.

"I doubt I'll have any issues finding a lovely young lady to spend my evening with," you respond as Hill hands you a small earpiece to use during the mission and the listening devices. After shifting into your undercover form, you straighten your tie and comb your hair with your fingers. Checking yourself in the small mirror you shrug, this is as good as you are going to look.

You reach for the door handle and Rogers stops you. "Remember Laufeyson, you're still on probation and this is officially your first solo mission. Stay on script and under the radar," he reminds you. "You don't want to give us any reason to reconsider the deal we made with Thor. Fury and Tony would have no issues sending you right back to Asgard if anything goes wrong."

You nod silently, not wanting to admit how well you understood the gravity of your current situation. You clear your throat then sarcastically say, "Its heartwarming to see how much confidence the team has in me."

"Just don't make us regret trusting you," he responds as you step out of the van.

Putting your hands in your coat pockets, you turn the corner from 6th Avenue onto West 3rd Street. The restaurant is visible roughly halfway down the street. When you step inside, you can see most of the tables full and the bar is crowded. The hostess walks over to you with a friendly smile and asks if you need a table.

"I'm actually supposed to be meeting a blind date here. Would it be alright if I checked to see if she was waiting for me at the bar?" you ask.

"Of course," the woman replies and you walk past her towards the back of the restaurant.

As you get closer you see several groups of friends, a few couples but only one woman sitting by herself. She is alternating between staring at her phone anxiously and looking around the room. Clearly she is waiting for someone, you think to yourself, but she is your best opportunity at the moment. You take a few more steps towards her and chuckle quietly as an idea quickly forms. You adjust your illusion so she will be the only one in the restaurant to see you as yourself and decide to go on a date, as your brother has so often suggested.

(Y/N POV)

You hold your phone nervously, seeing a new text from Michelle letting you know he was at the restaurant. You look up, scanning the large space but you have no idea who you are looking for. Suddenly your heart stops when you see Loki walking towards you with a smile.

This can't be happening, you think to yourself. Michelle worked for SHIELD but you knew she barely interacted with the Avengers or even the agents. She was on the technical side, working at least ten floors below them in the Tower. He had to be your date though, you quickly reasoned. Just moved here with his brother... really tall... sexy accent, that all sounds like what little you knew of Loki.

You look down at your phone and text Michelle, "I found him." You slide it into your pocket and get up from the stool as Loki approaches you.

"Hello darling," he says smoothly.

"Hi, I'm Y/N," you introduce yourself with a smile. You feel your phone go off but without reading the message, you put it on silent.

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Likes, comments and reblogs are always appreciated 💚💚

[maddiescinema]

first, your services are very much appreciated and i hope you have a wonderful day

second, here's what i remember about the fic i'm looking for (and if it's not real wow my brain is so good at coming up with stories)

lando norris x reader

pretty sure reader is female

its (freelance?) photographer reader and i think also best friend reader

reader was hired by mclaren to do photography stuff for f1 and of the drivers, thats where lando and reader first met and became friends

im pretty sure its part of a (ongoing?) series

part smau part written

financial issues & mclaren not being able to hire reader all the time or smth like that (maybe) lead reader to accept a contract or whatever its called to photograph a football team

its one of england's/uk's football teams (im not well versed in football so bear with me) i think

i think the team may have been manchester city? and i think i remember a jack grealish or someone like that

anyways

reader goes there and does readers job and becomes accquianted with the team members

there's this one member who has a fuckboy/playboy reputation, and keeps bothering reader to go for dinner and eventually reader says yes bc he promises its just between friends

dinner goes fine until the end where he confides in reader that the team is going to let him go if he doesnt get his act together or so he believes

then he asks reader to pretend to be his girlfriend so that doesnt happen, reader says no, he threatens reader and her career, so she gives in and he says lets kiss in front of the paps so word gets out and they do bc theyre outside having this convo and there are paps around and an article is posted and it goes to social media

anyways that dude is an asshole

reader just ignores him and tries not to be with him and interact with him going back to work, and reader is feeling really alone bc lando isnt answering her calls and she deosnt really have anyone at the moment to vent and talk about this situation to, also the internet gets to her a bit i think

reader is camping out in an empty conference room getting stuff done when she goes to get a snack and maybe the bathroom to cry & try to call lando again?

when she comes back theres someone there and its jack grealish(?) (not the relationship forcing asshole) and shes like oh im sorry i must have forgot our meeting

hes like we had no meeting i just wanted to check up on you, bc ive noticed you been down lately and the whole dating thing

readers opens up and vents about being forced into the relationship

he shares that the team is either waiting or looking for a reason to let the asshole go bc his behaviour is bad and the players dont like him and dont get along with him

and he promises reader that if she ever needs anything that hes there for her and that she can go him

and she feels safe and happy and not alone anymore

and thats all i remember, and since im 94% sure that this is a series or at least part of a series, i might be mixing up parts

if you can find it thank you! if not thanks for trying!

p.s. why is it so hard to find things on tumblr??? ive tried to look for this but im also weak and give up to easily

first of all, thank uu 🫶🏻 i’m happy to help!!

second of all, I SWEAT I’VE READ SOMETHING LIKE THIS BEFORE, like i’m so sure but going back to find it is actually impossible 😭 i’ll try again tomorrow cause i know i’ve read this one BUT if anyone knows where to find it PLEASE let us know in the comments, my inbox or my dms!! 🫶🏻🫶🏻

UPDATE:

“A Picture Is Worth A Thousand Words” by @f1byjessie

(thank you SO much to the comment and the anons who helped find this fic!! all the love to you guys!!)

[sebadztian]

If you don't mind me asking, can I ask your top favorite fics that you've written (feel free how much that you want to list)? Why they're special to you? Is there a specific inspiration when you wrote them?

Hello and thank you for the ask!

Oh, erm... I love everything that I've written, but here's probably my top five.

1. An Earl and His Demon Butler is and will always be special to me. I've always loved their master-butler dynamic, but at the same time, I want to explore how being in a relationship would change/affect that dynamic. It turned out much fluffier than I thought, but this is my first exploration in Sebaciel dynamic. I've written many other versions of them, but this fic is the basic foundation of my other versions/take on Sebaciel and how I write them. Sorry if I"m not explaining it very well...

2. The Spare. Inspired by a headcanon post on @teddylovestea old Tumbr (unfortunately the internet blackhole has swallowed that post 😭). This story taught me a lot about my own writing style and how to develop my characters, their struggles, emotional developments, motivations, and how they interact with each other (romantically or otherwise).

3. Ciel Phantomhive and the Prisoner of Azkaban. My first crossover fic. Inspired by a casual convo that I had with a friend irl. We were talking about putting various characters into the HP world and since I was (still am) into Sebaciel, I decided to send them to Hogwarts. It was very fun to write, but I kind of forgot just how dark the HP universe gets in the later books 🥲

4. Phantom P. I. series. Not exactly a single story, I know, but I just love this series. I'm a big fan of murder mystery (most esp a certain Mr. Holmes) and I've always wanted to write Ciel as a detective. That's what first drew me to the manga, the mystery (Book of Murder is my favourite arc for a reason).

5. Learning to Love. It's one of my current WIPs. What started as the 'buffer' in between writing other fics has become its very own story. I have so much fun writing this because this one is different from the others in the sense that this one is not bound by any rules or canon plot. I can do whatever I want with it.

Oh, wow! I end up listing most of my multi-chaptered stories! But that's exactly why I love them. I spend time working on them, develop the plot and the characters, and go through their journey with them.

Thanks again for asking! Have a nice day/evening!

[bump1nthen1ght]

Hello! I wanted to ask, in case you were free to write something about it,

I don't remember where i saw the prompt in but, it was about the reader, while being upset and seeking comfort (accidentally?) calling an Incubus/succubus hotline

I think your writing's very neat and i would love to see how you might fill the prompt, be it sfw or not. But also entirely understandable if you don't feel like it!

Wishing you a good day! <3

Sure thing Anon! Thank you for your patience, I really enjoyed this prompt! I also might do a part two to these head canons (if people are interested), as it's mostly first time meet-cute shenanigans and I'd love to do more fluff (and perhaps some NSFW 👀👀)

GN!Reader accidentally calling a spicy hotline SFW headcanons

- You had actually been trying to call your therapist’s office, ironically. You were halfway through an already terrible week and definitely in need of an extra weekend session

- So flustered from crying for the past half-hour, you didn’t think anything of it when the new “receptionist” had a voice like liquid sex.

- “____, huh? That's a nice name, can I get a description to match such a cute name?”

- Uh, weird way to word it, but maybe they needed you to confirm your identity?

- “Sure? I’ve come in to the physical office before, but my birthday is-” You ramble off some descriptors, hoping that's what they’re looking for.

- “Wow, in-person huh. You must be a special treat, dearie, most of my coworkers don’t offer in person services unless very specific circumstances. If you don’t mind me asking, what’s your type? I might know some of your past companions, it’s a small office.”

- Ok, this is sounding more and more like a HIPAA violation in the making. And “companion”? What does that even mean??

- “I’ve worked with Dr. Sadith before, but, uh, I’m just calling to meet with Dr. Robert’s today.”

- “Doctor?” The voice asks, slightly losing its extra flirtation. “We don’t have any doctors here, hon, do you know the name of the hotline they’re with?”

- Hotline? What does that-

- Wait, what number is this?? You know the office’s number by heart, so you didn’t save it in your contacts, but you always-

- You look down at unidentified contact number, just realizing you misdialed

- The sexy voice, the personal questions, was this- Oh god did you???

- I’m sorry but-” You rush out, “What is the name of this hotline?”

- “Lonely Nights, dearie, and just so you know we’re only $20/hour. I know some other lines are a bit more expensive, but me and my coworkers are plenty compensated in….other ways.”

- You’d heard of this one before; You think one of you’re friends had sent you the number half as a joke after a particularly bad date you’d had.

- But it is cheaper than your therapist

- “That’s good to hear. Wouldn’t want to support a corrupt business.” You twiddle your fingers, now fully aware of the sensuality of the situation. “What was your name again? I think I missed it.”

- “The name’s Drorgomoth, but my friends call me Drogo. Can I get your name, sweetheart? Or would you prefer I stick to pet names?”

- “Uh, ____’s fine. But the pet names are nice.”

- “Good to hear, ___” They all but purr. “Now, what can I do for you tonight?”

- The downpour of a rant comes before you can stop yourself. You started to feel guilty about 10 minutes in, remembering that this was in fact a very cheap incubus/succubus hotline and you were supplying no sexual energy for Drogo to feast on. Your comments begin to dwindle as you play with the bottom of your pajama shirt, throwing in a lot of “I don’t know, it’s silly” to try to give Drogo (and yourself) a way to end the convo without sounding like a dick.

- “That’s honestly pretty fucked up of them to say. It’s especially unprofessional considering they’re your coworker. How are you feeling about it?”

- (Ok so you know they’re being paid to be nice to you, but goddamnit that was good to hear.)

- “Honestly? Pretty shitty. You’re right, that was fucked up. And you want to know what else they did? They-”

- You banter for another 40 minutes, the conversation ebbing out from your work troubles and more to casual get-to-know you chit-chat.

- (“Alright, how do we feel about pineapple on pizza?” “Oh do not get me started-”)

- You check your clock, remembering the pie you had out in the oven and that you’d seen be moving onto a second hour on the phone line.

- “Well, I should probably let you go, probably some more eager customers that need your attention.” You chuckle, trying to play off how nice this hour has been. “Thanks for listening to me, I know it probably wasn’t what you signed up for on this job, but I really appreciate it.”

- “Honestly, it was really nice for me to.” Drogo says, their natural voice still sultry but far less affected than their performative phone sex one. “Don’t often get some proper chit-chat on the clock. It’s usually right down to business. Plus, you're fun to talk to.”

- “Well I’m glad.” You murmur, double embaressed by how flistered that got you.

- “And-” they add, drawing out their -n sound, “If you ever need a chit-chat buddy, off-the-clock, even, y’know what number to call. Have a great night, ____.”

- Seems like you have a whole new issue to tackle, a crush in a person you’ve never even seen.

[shiesan]

You at First Sip - Banzoin Hakka x Reader

You At First Sip - A Banzoin Hakka x Reader Fic. by shiesan.

Gender Neutral Reader x Banzoin Hakka

- just fluff, but there is a bit of swearing

(this fic is dedicated to one of my good friends, kana. Fuck you.)

I never proofread, I’m sorry. But ! I did my best.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It was a normal day in the land of Xenokuni. The streets were as lively as ever since spring has sprung. It’s usually this time of year when the citizens of Xenokuni love walking around the main town as it’s filled with flowers of all kinds.

Ah~ what a nice day to be outside

You’ve been stuck in your room catching up on work deadlines for weeks. It’s refreshing getting a breath of fresh air. You go down the streets to find your recent favorite coffee shop, Café Vanguard. It opened a couple of months ago and ever since then you’ve been going there almost every other day, well, at least when you’re not swamped with deadlines.

The bell chimes as you open the door and the familiar smell of roasted coffee beans fills your nose. You quickly search for the owner, with whom you’ve become quite acquainted, Josuiji Shinri. Shinri has been such a delight to be with! When times are slow he’d often chat with you and give you a pastry since you’re a regular. He acts like the kind and cool uncle you’re excited to meet at family gatherings.

But much to your surprise a different person mans the counter, someone you haven’t met before. He’s not too tall with beautiful purple hair. He doesn’t notice you come in as he’s screaming at Bettel, one of Shinri’s employees like he’s pissed off because of something. This makes you giggle a bit, he looks cute when he’s angry. You like his clothes and try to pick apart the details of his outfit, ‘He looks so stylish’ you think to yourself.

You don’t know how long it's been since you’ve been standing at the entrance but it’s been long enough for Shinri to call you over. “Y/n!” Shinri calls. “I haven’t seen you in weeks.” He said with a smile. You hurriedly place your belongings on one of the tables near the counter and walk up to Shinri. “Hi, Shin! Yeah, I know, work has been really rough and I barely had enough time to get myself groceries these past few weeks. But after working my ass off they’ll leave me alone for a few weeks, well I hope.” you say.

Whilst you and Shinri catch up, on the other side of the café chaos occurs. “Bettel, where the fuck did you put the opened carton of Almond milk?!” Shouts the purple man, Banzoin Hakka is his name. Shinri’s newest employee whom he hired a week after you started not coming to the store, which explains why you’ve never seen him before. 

“I don’t fucking know, Hakka! I already told you my last order needed *Oat* Milk. Not fucking Almond Milk. I did not touch that shit!” An angry Gavis Bettel replies.

“If you guys don’t stop arguing like a married couple I will personally ask Shinri to make you guys delivery men!” Shouts Flayon as he enters the front of the shop. You catch his eye.

“OOooh~ Y/n! Nice to see you again!” He walks up to you and gives you a small hug.

“Flay! Nice to see you too! Deliveries getting busier eh?” You smile at him.

“Yeah! It’s gotten more tiring but at least most people tip great!” He says.

Hakka and Bettel’s attention drifts toward you. 

Wow.

Is the only word running through Hakka’s mind. You’re just his type. And Bettel knows this, so as to attempt pissing off the exorcist even further Bettel says “Dibs on manning the register for them” with a sly smile on his face.

Hakka, who is appalled, raises an eyebrow. “Excuse me? Get your ass back to cleaning tables. It’s *my* turn.” He looks at you excitedly. Hakka notices how cute you look while Flay and Shinri are talking to you. ‘Damn what a smile’ he thinks as he dreamily looks at you, head resting on his chin and all. 

Soon your convo with Shin and Flay ends and you walk towards the counter. “Fuck” Hakka whispers to himself as you slowly walk to the counter and he struggles to make himself presentable.

“Hi!” you greet him with a smile. Holy shit is this cashier cute. You think to yourself.

“Hi~ Welcome to Café Vanguard! May I take your order?” Hakka greats you happily.

“Yeah, Hakka, I’ll have the hazelnut latte and an egg tart please.” You say with a smile.

Hakka sweats profusely, ‘how the fuck did they know my name?’ he thinks.

“Will that be all?” He manages to muster up. 

“Uhm, does your number happen to be on the menu?” You cheekily say while mentally digging yourself a grave and praying to the universe that they make your exit a painless one.

A small blush appears on Hakka’s face but he’s quick to recover, “u-uhm. Not for everyone, but for you I guess I can make an exception. That’ll be $5.60 in total” He smiles ‘What the actual fuck, Hakka’ He thinks to himself.

You hand him your money, “Great! You’ll just bring the order to my table right?” You smile at him.

“Y-yeah!” He smiles nervously. You notice a certain funny man behind Hakka,

“Oh! Bettel! How have you been doing?” You ask him. “Y/n! Been great! But I need to go back to the kitchen, take care of our little boy here for me ha? He’s a bit shy” Bettel says as he walks closer and puts a hand on Hakka’s shoulder.

“Okay, roger that.” You chuckle and give him a fake salute. “Well,” you turn your attention to Hakka who looks a bit more nervous, “I’ll be waiting over there.” you point to the table where your belongings are at. “Don’t forget the secret menu item that I ordered.” You tell him with a wink.

“Well, how could I forget something that someone as dazzling as you has ordered? Only the best service you~” He says and winks. With a light chuckle you walk to your table.

When he was out of your sight Hakka immediately turned to Bettel. “What the fuck man! You didn’t tell me you knew them! What was that fucking dibs for then?”

Bettel laughs. “Oh don’t get your bird briefs in a twist. Just a little payback for blaming me for the disappearance of the Almond Milk.” Bettel smirks and adds, “But hey, seems like they like you though, aren’t ya happy?” 

“IT SEEMS LIKE THEY DO! Did you see that Bettel, they *winked* at me. They even called me Hakka. How’d they know my name?!” Hakka says excitedly. 

“Yeah they like you but they didn’t fucking do a background check on you dumbass. You have a namecard? Hello??” Bettel says and heads into the kitchen.

“Oh yeah.” Hakka says in defeat. But that won’t get him down. You’re clearly interested in him! It shows!! He quickly assembles your order and prepares to bring it to you, making sure to look out if there are any other customers that he needs to tend to before he goes to flirt with you.

“You can go take a break, Hakka. I’ll be here at the counter for a bit” Shinri smiles at Hakka and winks. 

“Thanks, Shin. You’re the best” Hakka smiles and fixes his hair before walking to you.

“A hazelnut coffee, egg tart, my number, and the cutest and coolest exorcist in Xenokuni for the wonderful Y/N” He says as he places the items on the table one by one, apart from him of course.

You chuckle, “I don’t remember ordering the last thing on the menu.” You say as you reach for your coffee and take a sip.

Hakka smiles and watched you take a sip and enjoy the cup of coffee that he made. “Well, it's an ongoing promo for cute customers like you.” He winks and rests his chin on the palm of his hand. 

A slight blush appears on your face. “Oh yeah? Hmm.. Nice to know I’m special. Do I get to know more about this ‘Cutest and Coolest’ exorcist in all of Xenokuni’?” You say. 

Hakka chuckles and you guys talk for a solid 15 minutes. The rest of the boys gather at the counter and silently watch you both flirt back and forth. They found it cute that their little birbo finally found someone he likes, it was rare to see Hakka like this. They’re even happier that Hakka likes such a nice person like you, who they consider a close friend.

Shinri notices a big group of customers about to enter the shop and quickly calls Hakka over. “Hakka! Break time is over” He says.

“O-okay!” He shouts back at Shinri and quickly looks at you. ”Y/n, I had a really nice talk with you today and, only if you’d like, I’d like it for us to talk on another day. A date…maybe?” He looks you in the eye with a faint blush covering his cheeks.

“Sure.” You grab a tissue and write down your number. “Text me.” You say as you grab your stuff and wave goodbye to Hakka and the other guys.

Hakka waves back with the biggest smile on his face.

“He is so whipped for them.” Says Flayon.

“Yep. You could say it was love at first sip.” Bettel adds.

A chuckle emerges from Shinri, “O-kay everyone, back to work.” 

____________________________________________

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA finally finished it! Hope you guys enjoyed it!

[lunarsun12]

Don’t Touch My Kids - Part 1

Masterlist

Next Part

Felix and IN decided to visit their friends house, due to the situation they are in. Until of their hyung said they need to do all the bad things. To make them cool, IN only agreed to one prank. Until Felix got too carried away, and got caught by their Eomma.

How will Lee Know react to this suddden discovery ?

Back at SKZ Family Chat

Today 22:00

Lee Know🐰: So no one is confessing then huh? Who ever made my Lix and IN go wild are so dead

Bangchan🐺: Hun, didn’t we have convo to talk to the kids nicely 

Lee Know🐰: I did tell them nicely earlier

Bangchan🐺: Saying ‘confess or else I kill you’ is not being nice

Lee Know🐰: You have a problem?

Hyunjin🕺: Eomma you are overreacting, it wasn’t me!!

Lee Know🐰: Yeah sure! It got to be you, I see what you been teaching IN in secret

Hyunjin🕺: It could be Changbin, he normally is the culprit

Lee Know🐰: I already asked him, he said it wasn’t him

Hyunjin🕺: I was teaching them self defence!! Due to the situation they are in. I will never teach them bad stuff

Changbin🙄: Can you please not make a scene in front of wooyoung. He sent that video on the net and it went viral

Seungmin🐶: This I gotta see!

Seungmin🐶: Good thing, I stayed late! I don’t wanna be at home. When Eomma is this angry

Han🐿️: At least you get to go outside! Appa and Eomma refuse to let me out!

Bangchan🐺: You will thank us, one day…

Bangchan🐺: Hun, let’s just ask the kids ourselves. Instead of blaming hyunjin. You know he adores them especially little Innie!

Lee Know🐰: Fine…I’m onto you hyunjin. Don’t even think about leaving the house

Let’s have flashback to this morning of what really happened.

There was a large boom from kitchen, which lead to huge scream from Han. As his hair nearly set on fire, which lead to Chan holding the fire extinguisher in his hand to the kitchen.

Bangchan: Han? Are you okay?

Han: I- I just made toast and suddenly I see fire

Bangchan: Are you hurt?

Han: I won’t be anymore, if you and Eomma stop overreacting about me leaving the house

Bangchan: No can do!

After Han and Bangchan are busy, negotiating about Han’s right to be free. Felix and IN were giggling in the background, as they little prank worked.

Felix: Wow doing this prank is actually really fun!

IN: Our hyungs are the best! For teaching us how to be cool

After Bangchan and Han finally negotiated, to set Han free. Bangchan had no choice, as Han was about to bite him if it carried on. Then Lee Know entered and saw the kitchen in a state.

Lee Know: HAN! Why did you make the mess in the kitchen again

Han: It wasn’t me, the toaster exploded

Bangchan: He is right! I heard the boom and there was fire. I have to put it out

Lee Know: Whatever, I’m busy already with the cats

Later on in the afternoon, poor Han always in the crossfire. He entered the bathroom and got flour bombed. Which then lead to him texting the chat.

Back at SKZ Family Chat

Han🐿️: WHO HAS BEEF WITH ME! I AM NOT AFRAID OF YOU!!

Bangchan🐺: Hey hey calm down!

Han🐿️: First it was the toaster this morning and now this! Someone has it in for me!!

Changbin🙄: This is hilarious hahaha

Bangchan🐺: Okay guys, cmon and apologise to Han. Boy I thought keeping him indoors will be safe

Changbin🙄: It wasn’t me, I don’t live here

Bangchan🐺: Hyunjin, apologise to Han and say you are sorry

Hyunjin🕺: It’s not me as well!

Bangchan🐺: It got to be you, you are the only in the house. It can’t be Lix and Innie

Lee Know🐰: Hyunjin just apologise!

Han🐿️: Hey hyunjin, what have I done to you??

Hyunjin🕺: You guys it not me, I swear!!

Han🐿️: I will be th bigger person and let it go! Please stop with the pranks!

Hyunjin🕺: It got to Lix and IN then!

Lee Know🐰: Stop blaming them! Well it is clearly your fault!

Back at Felix and IN private Chat 

IN🦊: Lix! I feel bad hyunjin got in trouble because of us

Felix☀️: This is the process bro, our Hyungs said so

IN🦊: B-but Hyunjin treats us so well, it’s so wrong

Now for Felix and IN final prank, they were busy making the prank. They didn’t notice that Lee Know has walked in, checking up on them.

Felix: This will be epic *giggles*

Lee Know: I can’t believe this…

Felix and IN turned their head in unison and saw the shock / confused Lee Know standing at the door.

IN: Lix I told you no more pranks

Without hesitation, Lee Know bolted outside the door and immediately texted the groupchat. Knowing exactly who did it!

Next Part