#source: fleabag

[mdzs-owns-my-ass-i-guess]

At the monthly MXTX red-and-blacks meeting

Wei Wuxian: i wanna fuck a monk

Luo Binghe: Lan?

Wei Wuxian: yes.

Luo Binghe: a good one.

Wei Wuxian: yes.

Luo Binghe: looks good in the... *gestures indicating the forehead ribbon*

Wei Wuxian: yes

Luo Binghe, sagely: i understand

Hua Cheng: do you want to fuck a monk or do you want to fuck god?

Wei Wuxian: can you fuck god?

Hua Cheng: oh yes

[team-iceflower]

Yang: "How are you? What's going on with you?"

Ruby: "Erm. I met someone!"

Yang: "What? Really? Oh my god, that's amazing! What does she do?"

Ruby: "She's an Heiress."

Yang: [Slowly pinches the bridge of her nose]

[acidicalkalia]

Vox: I love you.

Alastor: It'll pass.

[incorrect-tmnt2012-quotes]

“I am not a bad guy! I just have a bad personality, it’s not my fault. Some people are born with fucked personalities.”

— Karai, at some point

[moonah-rose]

Crowley: I love you.

Aziraphale: It will pass.

Crowley, on the drive away: Bastard angel fleabagged me!

[selfship-quotes]

S/I: I wanna fuck a priest.

Platonic F/O: Catholic?

S/I: Yes.

Platonic F/O: A good one?

S/I: Yes.

Platonic F/O: Looks good in the... uhm?

S/I: Mmmm yes.

Platonic F/O: I understand..... do you really want to fuck the priest or do you want to fuck God?

S/I: .... Can you fuck God?

Platonic F/O: Oh yes.

[incorrect-malfoys]

Narcissa: Just thought we were hanging out...just as friends

Bellatrix: We're not friends. We're sisters, go get your own friends

[spiltinksky]

Jeonghan, sobbing: I’m okay! I’m fucking okay. I’m excellent.

Wonwoo:

Jeonghan, still crying: I know I seem mental, but I’m FINE!

[andrews-jort-loving-pipe-dream]

A fan: I love you!

Andrew: *smoking a cigarette* It'll pass.

[hawkinsincorrect]

Nancy: I don’t know what to do with it.

Robin: With what?

Nancy: With all the love I had for Barb. I don’t know where to put it now.

Robin: I’ll take it. I’m serious. It sounds lovely. I’ll have it.

[totallycorrectsailormoonquotes]

Naru: I don’t know what to do with it. Umino: With what? Naru: With all the love I had for Masato Sanjoin. I don’t know where to put it now. Umino: I’ll take it. I’m serious. It sounds lovely. I’ll have it.

[team-iceflower]

Winter: Is it running through the airport kind of love? Weiss: I'm not going to the airport. She'd think I was insane. Winter: I'm just sayi- Weiss: The airport. How would I even find her? You can't get through security without a boarding pass. Winter: No, I wasn't suggesting- Weiss: I'd have to buy a dummy ticket just to get through the gate. I don't know when her flight is or which terminal. Imagine if I knew that. Imagine her finding out I knew all that. Imagine if she was just in her boots buying a pair of tweezers in terminal 5 and suddenly I was there. "Hello Ruby." Winter: *Nodding* That would be intense. Weiss: *Sighs* The only person I'd run through an airport for is you. Winter: Go out the side door. Now.

[adasknife]

ada: i love you

reader: ... it'll pass

[incorrectuksies]

davey: *says something awkward*

race: is that a joke?

davey: ...i don't know.

[moonah-rose]

Rhaenyra: Is everything all right, Your Grace?

Alicent: Oh fuck you, calling me 'Your Grace', like it doesn't turn you on!

[incorrecthogwartsmysteryquotes]

MC: I love you.

Talbott: It'll pass.