#source: me and my qpp today

[beansforwhat]

Remus: Oh, what's this? A comedically large lollipop-

Janus: A comically large lollipop you use to chop people's heads off?

Remus, in a high-pitched voice: It's mistew Guillotine, owo-

Janus, laughing and mortified: Dear Lord-

[xiaolumi-love]

i felt called to do a reading with my Starseed Oracle deck for the first time in like... years, today. i got three cards, which is a number of communication, opportunities and unlimited creativity.

the first card i got was Karmic Relationships. it speaks of relationships being a source of learning, an opportunity to grow. i'm wondering where i can learn at this point in time. is it speaking of my past relationships? my current ones? my future ones? i think it means a mix of all of these. i've always found it extremely rewarding to grow with people, to learn and communicate and collaborate. i strive to be better at it everyday. it's premised on empathy and emotional intelligence, kindness and generosity, nuance and meta thinking.

i feel like i've been learning from my past relationships a lot lately, through therapy and unpacking them on my own too. healing trauma allows me to become something i wasn't before. it allows me to reach new heights.

i feel as if the relationships i had with my biological relatives and my exes allowed me to reflect on how i could become more. they incidentally allowed me to perceive how i could realise my potential. i didn't know the true extent of my potential in the past, but now i know it's truly infinite. the more i seek to understand myself, accept myself, treat myself with kindness... the better i will be able to navigate the world around me.

the second card was The Blue Flame. this card talks about the beings that allow for spiritual growth, DNA healing and activation. it means i may be going through a period of intense expansion of my senses, and mystical experiences.

and that's very true. i feel like following my instincts makes everything feel so rich and right and alive. even the simple things like cooking, cleaning and showering, just taking care of myself -- it feels divine. it feels so good to treat myself well, in a way that i haven't felt before. all because i've emotionally understood that i deserve this.

when i watch anime or talk to my Soul Tribe i feel just as fulfilled -- like i'm receiving information downloads from the Universe in all things. there's signs in everything, it's just a matter of interpreting it astutely. i'm adapting and transmuting from one element to another, and i always had this potential. it's rough at times, it can get messy, but i feel so utterly safe and protected and cherished so it's okay. more than okay, it's wonderful.

the third card was Hiraeth. this is a welsh word, and in the context of the Starseed Oracle it means a longing for the stars, a homesickness derived from your soul originally being of a different origin than Earth. this is a card that reminds me that if i ever feel this way and attempt to seek to fulfill this feeling, i can remember that my soul consciously chose to incarnate on Earth, and chose to commit to life on Earth.

i'm not entirely sure if i have been feeling this way or not. but i do feel at home with my Twinflame. i think what this card is calling me to do though, is to balance this feeling with the rest of Earth. meeting and getting to know my Twinflame qpp was what first allowed me to feel connected to the Earth, but that's not the end of the story.

i need to remember that while i can have my home in my Twinflame, Earth is also my home. i am grounded and happy and safe on this planet. i am secure, and loved and cherished by all the spirits and guardians and angels of this world. and all my allies and Soul Tribe, even those i am yet to meet, adore me. all of these beings, all of Earth, is my home.

[patches-and-her-selfships]

everyone thinks i’m crazy...

crazy for you, oh boy...

* = i use a different s/i to ship with this f/o (usually when i ship with a minor and an adult in the same source)

^ = i ship with this f/o in an au

foster's home for imaginary friends

-wilt (status: romantic) (sharing: no) (tag name: sorry i like you 🏀)

-coco (status: romantic) (sharing: yes) (tag name: it's a bird! it's a plane! it's the love of my life!)

poly ship tag: the palm trees are really tall today! 🏀🌴

-eduardo (status: platonic)

-frankie (status: platonic)

-mac (status: platonic)

-bloo (status: enemy)

monster prom franchise

-stu (status: romantic) (comfy sharing: yes) (tag name: i'm high on love! 🗿)

-wanda (status: romantic) (comfy sharing: iffy) (tag name: don't you know that you're toxic? ☣)

poly ship tag: i'm not at the beach this is a bathtub! 🗿☣

scott (status: platonic)

polly (status: platonic)

papa louie

-kingsley (status: romantic) (sharing: iffy) (tag name: king of my heart 👑)

-mr. bomboloney (status: romantic) (sharing: iffy) (tag name: mr. bomboloney tag tbd 🎙️)

-kenji^ (status: romantic) (sharing: iffy) (tag name: hotto dogu! 🌭)

-tohru* (status: romantic) (sharing: iffy) (tag name: wanna share this bubble tea with me? 🎮)

-bruna romano^ (status: romantic) (sharing: iffy) (tag name: bruna tag tbd 🎼)

-timm (status: crush)

-quinn (status: crush)

-marty (status: platonic)

-mitch (status: platonic)

-carlo romano^ (status: familial) (brother-in-law)

-gino romano^ (status: familial) (cousin-in-law)

-edoardo romano^ (status: familial) (father-in-law)

-olga romano^ (status: familial) (stepmother-in-law)

pizza tower (i am aware that the game has some problematic elements and that the developers are not good people, i am critical of the game)

-peppino spaghetti (status: ex)

bfdi

-balloony (status: romantic) (sharing: iffy) (tag name: but when he loves me i feel like i’m floating 🎈)

-cloudy (status: romantic) (sharing: no) (tag name: i’m on cloud nine! ☁)

poly ship tag: boyfriend collector! ☁🎈

-eraser (status: romantic) (sharing: iffy) (tag name: all cake is good cake if i get to share it with you 🧁)

-blocky (status: crush)

-donut (status: qpp)

-gelatin (status: platonic)

-teardrop (status: platonic)

-leafy (status: enemy)

-pin (status: enemy)

nichijou

-mai minakami (status: romantic) (comfy sharing: iffy) (tag name: don’t go prankin’ my heart 👓)

-nano (status: crush)

-yuuko (status: qpp)

-mio (status: platonic)

-hakase (status: platonic)

-sakamoto (status: platonic)

-yuuko's mom (status: emeny)

discolotl! (original work)

pan tera (status: romantic) (comfy sharing: iffy) (tag name: pan tag tbd 🐆)

jam n. jelly (status: romantic) (comfy sharing: iffy) (tag name: jam tag tbd 🚦)

poly ship tag: pan + jam tag tbd 🐆🚦

leche (status: familial) (child)

you gotta keep your cool! (original work)

-miles z. cooldude (status: romantic) (comfy sharing: iffy) (tag name: miles tag tbd 😎)

-nerdy mcdorkface (status: crush)

romance chateau (original work)

-wrench (status: romantic) (sharing: iffy) (tag name: fix this fixer-upper up with a little bit of love! 🔧)

-plume (status: romantic) (sharing: iffy) (tag name: pet the fluffy chicken 🐓)

poly ship tag: motor oil and apple pie 🔧🐓

unnamed source #1 (original work)

-rigel (status: romantic) (sharing: iffy) (tag name:the stars aligned for you and me 🌠)

-asuma (status: qpp)

unnamed source #2 (original work)

-rascal fukazawa (status: romantic) (comfy sharing: iffy) (tag name: i'll stop loving you when hell freezes over 🦝)

-mayonnaise paraguay (status: romantic) (comfy sharing: iffy) (tag name: oh jesus what is that? i think i’m in love with it 💕

-sapphire edwards (status: romantic) (comfy sharing: iffy) (tag name: a royal pain in the ass 🦚)

unnamed source #3

leopold a. d. bird (status: romantic) (comfy sharing: iffy) (tag name: leopold tag tbd 🐞)

minerva "tenny" bird (status: familial) (daughter-in-law)

inanimate insanity

-trophy (status: romantic) (comfy sharing: no) (tag name: you won my heart 🏆)

-pickle (status: romantic) (comfy sharing: no) (tag name: partners in dumbassery 🥒)

-soap (status: romantic) (comfy sharing: iffy) (tag name: you wash away my troubles! 🫧)

-yin yang (status: romantic) (comfy sharing: yes) (tag name: my scrungly boys ☯)

-paper (status: romantic) (comfy sharing: yes) (tag name: let’s be mentally ill together 📄)

poly ship tag: love and smooching in hotel oj 🎥

-cherries (status: familial) (sons)

-bomb (status: qpp)

-tissues (status: qpp)

-cheesy (status: qpp)

-paintbrush (status: qpp)

-lightbulb (status: platonic)

-fan (status: platonic)

-test tube (status: platonic)

-suitcase (status: platonic)

-steve cobs (status: enemy)

-baseball (status: enemy)

-knife (status: ex) (tag name: lookin' sharp 🔪)

-oj (status: ex) (tag name: meet me at the hotel room 🍊)

stardew valley

-elliott (status: romantic) (comfy sharing: yes) (tag name: i would sail the oceans for my love 📖)

-maru (status: crush)

-shane (status: platonic)

-pam (status: platonic)

-kent (status: platonic)

-linus (status: platonic)

-vincent (status: platonic)

-jas (status: platonic)

-morris (status: enemy)

-pierre (status: enemy

curious george

-the man in the yellow hat (status: familial) (dad)

-george (status: familial) (little brother)

encanto

-luisa (status: romantic) (comfy sharing: yes) (tag name: my love can move mountains 🌄)

-the madrigal family (status: familial)

splatoon

-spyke (status: romantic) (comfy sharing: yes) (tag name: screw off love 🪛)

-annie (status: romantic) (comfy sharing: yes) (tag name: you’re not a loser 🐠)

poly ship tag: the hot guy the shy girl and i 🪛🐠

-sheldon (status: platonic)

-crusty sean (status: platonic)

deltarune

-rouxls kaard (status: ex) (tag name: a puzzling loveth ♠️)

-lancer (status: familial) (son)

the sims 4

-johnny zest (status: crush)

-agnes crumplebotton (status: emeny)

cars

-guido (status: crush)

-flo (status: crush)

-ramone (status: crush)

-luigi (status: qpp)

-mater (status: platonic)

jujutsu kaisen

-nanami (status: crush)

saiki k

-nendo (status: crush)

mst3k

-tom servo (status: ex) (tag name: red as a tomato 🔴)

fnaf security breach

-monty (status: ex) (tag name: bogey boyfriend 🐊)

[somuch-4-stardust]

okay <3 today we r talking abt headcanons i hate!!! umm none of these have any basis i just dont like them i think they r wrong <3 obviously i dont hate people who enjoy these hc do whatever u want have fun etc etc etc i am not attacking u specifically

starting off w one of my least favorites. cwilbur is NOT transfem!! he is intesex and transmasc (source: me)!!!. all the minors in the server are NOT friends u cant just push cpurpled into a group w benchtrio bc they r all minors??????? (<- im totally about to do exactly that in a sec when i talk abt hc i do like. the real reason is i think cpurpled and cranboo would hate each other ^-^) ctommy DOES have wings BUT they r gold and if u say anything else ur WRONG!!! ctommy was not nine during the first lmanburg war!! cranboo and ctechno are not that close (<- this is actually kinda canon i do not care tho let me be in denial) ctommy is not the token straight please stop saying hes the token straight if he heard you he would be sad (<- on that topic. transfem ctommy is acceptable. i have to put it here bc im not putting it in the 'my fav hc' category but i think it needs to be said) ckarl and cghostbur are not as stupid as u guys make them out. ctechno is not the middle child he is not the middle child U R WRONG!! ctommy also was not focused on saving lmanburg bc 'omg city where ppl live im a hero' and more 'thats. my house bro also i dont want to die' hes not as selfless as u think!! hes also stupid like ctommy is genuinely just an idiot

and now. for loving <3 cpurpled and ctommy are qpps and they live together in cpurpleds ufo which is definitely totally not blown up. ctommy listens to saint bernard by lincoln too much. ctubbo and ctommy are not on speaking terms and honestly it hasnt upset either of them. ctechno is in that stage of trans where he like doesnt mind he/him prns and doesnt care enough to change prns. csbi totally is real and also includes hannah and niki and sally is married to niki and yes sally is a fish niki is like. a mermaid or whatever but sally is literally just a salmon. ctechno and cwilbur and ctommy and cniki and channah and probably csally are all autistic. cpurpled is autistic too but denies it bc 'really is it a big deal any way' ummm cquackity has a touch of the tism too mayhaps. oh and cslime is autistic. anyways back to cpurpled. he is a transman and also refuses to dye his hair purple bc hes an asshole and also he has abandonment issues bc i mean look at him. cniki is the coolest transfemme ever. ctommy is a pretty girl but hes a boy. cghostbur and lmanburg and alivebur and revivedbur and stuff all have different pronouns. they all listen to los campesinos actually los camp is always playing on the server and if for some reason not a single person was thinking abt los camp the whole place would blow up boom boom. ctommy is missing a limb or too (part of his hand, his foot, a little bit of the back of his head/skull, his ear) ctechno gives people he likes gold. like a lot of gold like his family just ended up w huge ass collections of gold jewelry. ctommy uses only neos but doesnt care enough to correct ppl cuz like ITS ALOT OF WORK U KNOW ITS NOT A BIG DEAL. cdream isnt transphobic but also did misgender ctommy on purpose in exile. ctommy had raccoon ears and tail which was. quite the combo w the wings. in the csbi family the order, eldest to youngest was: kristin, phil (<- obviously. they r old haha point and laugh) techno, wilbur, niki, hannah, tommy. cpurpled does kill people in cold blood and he isnt bothered by it for the most part. calyssa is transmasc. ctommy bites people. cbbh is evil but also dad shaped. ctommy is scared of swimming.

[blackwinged-soul]

I’ve apparently been thinking too hard about T|_T lately.

Maybe because I’ve explained Strong Reaction things from my kintype from that source to the QPP? Maybe I should blame my dash? Maybe I should blame my back (injury???) making me hold still and forcing me to Think about things, because that’s what my ADHD brain does when I’m understimulated?

I took a sip of drink. Today I picked the lime flavor.

It tasted way too strong and sharp.

I love lime normally. Disliking citrus is one of the hallmarks of a sensory H|arrow/hark shift.

Me at the brainshift mechanism:

[neon-zoologist]

i will do my assignment tomorrow. i am saying it here to hold myself accountable

[girl-with-cat-eyes]

Paperwork

 Part 3 of the Reba au. Pat one and part two.

Summary: The weekend comes and Janus deals with paperwork, one-night stands, and meeting his ex-husband's new boyfriend. 

A/N: So I went on a vacation to see @forever-forgotten-angel and took a break from writing. But I'm back and writing! Special thanks as always to @amazon-me-bitches and my qpp @forever-forgotten-angel for beta reading this fic! And now, without further ado, my fic.

~

When Janus woke up on Friday things seemed almost normal. He dropped Emile and Remy off at school, Patton agreed to pick them up. Virgil had ridden with Thomas, which meant that Janus didn’t have to worry about any pickups today. That was good, considering he was working late. He had a trial coming up in two weeks, a factory worker who’d been injured on the job due to company negligence of machinery. Janus had been happy to take the case. 

 Of course, it meant that he wasn’t leaving the office until 8 PM. Janus yawned as he left the office, ready to get home and sleep. It would be lovely. A full night’s worth of sleep and then the weekend. Not that he wouldn’t be working of course. But his home office was far superior to the one he had at work. Maybe he’d take the boys out for a picnic if he had time. That would be nice. Emile had been wanting to go to the park and see the ducks before it got too cold. They could feed the ducks.

Janus was interrupted from his thoughts by a loud clang. He reached for his pepper spray, better safe than sorry. There were clangs, seeming to come from a dumpster next to the parking lot. It was most likely a raccoon but Janus wasn’t taking any chances. He began quickly walking to his car, eyes trained on the dumpster the whole time. He was halfway to his car when the source of the noises showed itself.

 Janus prided himself on his eloquent speech but all he could find it in himself to say was, “What?”. Brilliant Janus, just brilliant. 

 It was a person, taller than Janus. They had dark curly hair from what Janus could see, and a mustache as well. They held a possum in their arms. Janus blinked, “What did I tell you about running off Tallulah? You’re not going to find any tasty treats in a law office’s dumpster. We have to go to taco bell for that. The only thing you’ll find in there is paper, office supplies, and-”, they looked up and made eye contact with Janus, “And the sexiest man alive.”

They’d ran up to Janus before he had a chance to react, “Hello sexy. Are you a lawyer? Because it’s illegal for someone to be as sexy as you are.”

 “Sorry about that. I tend to get over-excited.”, they offered a hand out to shake, “I’m Remus. He/him pronouns.”

“Janus.”, he found himself saying, “He/him pronouns. What exactly were you doing in the dumpster?”

“How dare you insinuate that Tallulah is merely a pet. She is my baby.” 

 “Oh! Tallulah here thought she could get snacks in that dumpster over there so I had to get her out.”, he held up the possum in his arms.

“Right. And Tallulah is your pet?”

 “Well, it appears your baby wants to eat office supplies.”, Janus reached out to pet the possum in question,  scritching her ears. He smiled as she leaned into the touch. He smiled at the sight.

 “Believe me she doesn’t want that. I’ll take her to taco bell. She enjoys their burritos. You’re more than welcome to join if you want?”, it was a stupid idea. They’d just met, Remus was a total stranger. He could be a serial killer for all Jan knew.

 Message sent to Patton at 8:23 PM.

 “Hey Pat, don’t wait up for me. I’m gonna get take out on the way home. Make sure Remy’s homework is done before he plays on the Switch.”

 ~

Taco Bell, Janus thought, was best enjoyed at night. They’d gotten fast food and now sat out in the parking lot, a feast of fast food laid out before them. He watched as Tallulah happily ate her promised bean burrito. It was nice, relaxing even. Janus smiled as he watched, “So how does one end up with a pet possum?”

Remus grinned, “I birthed her from my womb.”, seeing Janus’ unamused expression he turned serious, “I rescue animals. She was rescued from an exotic pet dealer. She can’t be rehabilitated into the wild, unfortunately.”

“I see. She’s very sweet.”, Janus continued petting the possum in question, “So what do you do with your time? Besides rescue possums and climb into dumpsters of course." 

 “I’m a midwife actually.”, Remus grinned. Janus looked over to where he had unhinged his jaw to deepthroat his burrito like a snake. He waited for Remus to finish before speaking. 

 “A midwife?”

 Remus nodded, “Yeah. I make bank. Which is nice cause it means I can foster lots of animals.”, he continued deepthroating the burrito.

 Well, that was unexpected. Janus stared at the man in front of him delivering babies and truthfully he couldn’t picture it. Remus seemed more like the type of person to go into a job that didn’t involve babies. He seemed more likely to own a demolition derby, “You don’t seem like the type. Can I ask a dumb question?”

 “Sure.”

 “Well, it’s not a question. I just didn’t know men could be midwives.”

 “It shocks a lot of people actually. Most people don’t think women would be comfortable working with me.”

“I’m guessing that’s not true.”

 “I work with trans men mostly. Having a trans midwife is reassuring. I know what they’re going through. And sometimes cis midwives can be judgy.”

“You’re trans?”

 “Is he?”

 “Yep.”

“Well then.”, Janus took a bite of his food, chewing thoughtfully, “My son’s pregnant.”

 “Yeah. It’s been super stressful because he’s 17.”, Janus sighed, “How much would it cost for you to work with us? Any resources would be helpful.”

 “For you? I’ll do it for free. I know all too well what it’s like to be a pregnant teen. And I think you’re cute.”, he winked and Janus felt his face warm in a way he hadn’t felt in years. 

 “You- you got pregnant as a teen?”, he forced himself to get out. Remus nodded and for a brief second Janus thought he saw a tear in his eye. 

 “Yeah but I miscarried. Lack of resources and all. So now I make sure that no one else has to go through what I went through.”

 Message sent to Patton at 11 PM

 “That’s amazing. You have to let me pay you though.”

“I told you, helping a cutie like you out is payment enough.”, he leaned forward, “I wouldn’t mind a kiss though. That is, if you’re agreeable?”, Remus leaned forward and Janus could smell his cologne. The warm, spicy, citrus scent drove him wild. It was like he was standing on the edge of a cliff, staring at the abyss below. And Janus was happy to fall.

 Don’t wait up for me. I’ll be back late.

 ~

Patton Picani-Hart had never been a morning person. Sure, he wanted to be; but late nights at the restaurant and his sleep schedule meant that he had trouble pulling himself out of bed in the morning. It also meant he could barely function without at least three cups of coffee. He was currently standing in front of the coffee maker, staring at it as if he could will the coffee to brew faster. 

 It had been a long night. Janus had to work late, which meant it was up to Patton to pick up Emile and Remy from school and drive them home. Luckily Virgil and Thomas had agreed to watch them because then he had to rush back to the restaurant for the dinner shift. He got back by 11 to all of the kids asleep and leftover greek food waiting for him. He’d been so tired that he’d eaten the food and fallen asleep immediately, never seeing the message he had from Janus.

 He hadn’t seen it until the morning when he awoke to Emile sitting on his chest asking for food. A quick check of his phone revealed it was 9 am and Janus had stayed out all night. So Patton did the only thing he could do; he got dressed and went downstairs to make breakfast.  Six breakfast burritos later, and he was beginning to wonder where Janus was. Clearly, he’d had a good night if he was gone for this long. At least he hoped it was good. Regardless, it was good for Janus to start exploring romance again if he was ready. Hopefully, the relationship would be good for him. He couldn’t wait to hear the details. 

 Patton was considering calling him when there was a jingle of keys at the front door. Janus walked through the door. His hair stuck out in multiple directions, his suit was unkempt, and Patton could see multiple hickeys on his chest. It had been a good night after all. He handed him a cup of coffee, “Good morning. Looks like you had a good night.”

 Janus blushed and Patton knew exactly how good of a night he’d had. He grinned as he watched the man in question try to come up with an excuse, “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”, his ex may have had a silver tongue, but that all went away when he was flustered. 

 “I’m not mad. You seem to forget that we’re separated, soon to be divorced. Going out is healthy.”, Patton handed him a plate of food with a smile, “So who is he?”

 “His name is Remus and we met last night. He’s nice. I invited him over for dinner Tuesday night.”, Patton frowned. Having a one-night stand was one thing, heck dating was fine. But bringing this guy around the kids after one date didn’t seem like the best idea. 

 “I support you dating Jan, but don’t think you should date a little bit longer before bringing him home. Virgil won’t mind but it might confuse Emile and Remy.”, it was the truth. The boys would be confused if Janus introduced them to a new boyfriend and then it didn’t work out. Best to wait until it was serious. That was what Patton had done.

 Janus blinked as if it was a new idea to him. “Pat, I’m not introducing him as my boyfriend. He’s a midwife. I invited him over to meet Virge. I thought it might be a good idea to have a midwife as well as an OBGYN.” 

 Patton sighed in relief; he didn’t want to sound like a jealous ex, especially when he’d been the one to ask for the divorce. This Remus coming over as a midwife was different though. And it meant that he wouldn’t have to worry if the kids would be confused. Speaking of the kids, Emile ran in at that moment, practically bouncing in his shoes, “Is breakfast ready yet?”

 ~

 Janus smiled at their youngest, picking him up and balancing him on his hip, “Yep. How about you go get your brothers and then we can eat.”, Emile nodded and ran off as fast as he could. Janus nodded and went to leave the kitchen, “I should go change.”

Pat nodded, a thought coming to him, “Virgil wanted to come to help me prep for lunch rush today at the restaurant. Could you pick him up before the dinner rush? I don’t want to stress him.”, Janus nodded before leaving, leaving Patton alone to wonder what this Remus was like.

Janus hummed as he drove to Pat’s. He’d spent most of the day in the office today, getting caught up on his paperwork. He’d promised to take the boys to the park tomorrow for a picnic, which meant he had to get it all done today. Thomas had luckily agreed to watch Remy and Emile once Pat and Virgil left to prep for the day, giving Janus ample time to work. 

 Soon 5 o’clock came around and Janus was leaving to go pick up Virgil. He was sure that Virgil would be ready to go home. Janus had seen just how busy the restaurant could get during the dinner rush. Virgil may have wanted to be a chef, but he wasn’t ready for that. Especially right now.

 He pulled up behind the restaurant, parking in the employee parking lot. Inside he could see the kitchen was a flurry of work, prepping as much as possible before it got truly busy. Waving to the kitchen staff, Janus headed to the back office where he knew Patton would be finishing paperwork before he went to go work in the kitchen. Virgil would most likely be in there with him. Only he didn’t see Virgil when he entered the office. 

 Patton stood in front of his desk, kissing an unfamiliar man as if his life depended on it. Janus blinked before realizing this must be the Logan he’d heard about. He quickly realized he was staring and, unsure of what to do, coughed to announce his presence. Patton jumped and turned around, Logan blushing and looking down. 

 “Janus, hey, what are you doing here?”, Patton looked flustered, like they weren’t divorced, “This is Logan, I told you about him.”, behind him, Logan nodded, still blushing too much to properly speak.

 “Nice to meet you, I’m here to pick up Virgil. I said I’d be here at 5, remember?”

 Pat’s eyes went wide, “Is it 5 already? I need to go get started in the kitchen.”, he moved away from Logan and ran to put on his chef’s coat, “Virgil was taking inventory in the fridge. Janus nodded and left the office, hearing Logan saying he should get going as he left.

 He did in fact find Virgil in the freezer, stocking ingredients and taking note of what was low. Upon seeing his dad he handed the list to a cook before standing up to leave. They got to the car, Virgil getting in, and Janus was about to when he heard someone call his name.

 Logan stood in front of him, looking made together and not at all how he looked when Janus had seen him earlier, “Yes?” 

 Logan took a deep breath before speaking, “I just wanted to apologize that we had to meet like that. I wanted to meet you and the kids properly, not having you walk in on me kissing Patton goodbye.”, Janus nodded in understanding.

 “It’s fine. Patton and I were separated before you two started dating. Just treat him right. We may not be together anymore, but I still care about him. He has a good heart and I don’t want to see that heart broken.”

 “I never want to hurt him.”

 “Then we’ll have no issue. Goodbye then.”, Janus got in the car, giving the man a wave before driving off. He turned to Virgil, who was listening to music next to him, giving him a tap on the shoulder.

 Virgil looked up at him, taking off his headphones before speaking, “What’s up?”

 “How does Indian sound for dinner?”, Virgil nodded and Janus set off to get take out. There was a few moments of silence before he spoke again, “Virgil, you don’t mind if your father and I date again, right? I mean date people that aren’t each other.”

 Virgil shrugged, “It doesn’t bother me. You two are getting a divorce, dating seems to make sense. And I know you’ll both always be here for me and Remy and Emile.”, Janus nodded, comfortable in the fact that he knew at least one of his kids was ok with him dating.

~

A/N: We finally meet Remus and Logan. All that's left is Roman, who will be in the next part.

 Disclaimer: Possums are not pets, they are wild animals. Furthermore, I do not know their diet but I'm taco bell isn't part of it. Tallulah is a magical possum and real-life rules do not apply to her. Do not inbox me saying possums don't eat bean burritos. 

Besides that, I'm taking prompts for this verse, so if you have prompts send them in! I'd love to see your hcs for this au. And as always, if you like this fic, leave a comment. Thank you for reading!

[private-snippers]

A Fog of Green

Soulmate September Day 4 - There is a trail of colour only you can see that marks out where your soulmate has been.

Pairings: Intrulogical, very minor anxceit (it’s mentioned in like two paragraphs at the very end

Warnings: blink and you’ll miss it self deprecation, talk of blood, gore, death (generally just Remus being Remus)

Notes: you can read Intrulogical as romantic or queer-platonic. I like to think of them as QPP’s, but there is talk of proposing at the end and I’m not sure if QPP’s get married?

ao3

Logan sighed, checking his watch for what must have been the seventh time in the past minute. If Patton has been in his position, he may have said Logan was checking his watch for the thousandth time, but he wasn’t, and Logan was not one for hyperboles.

Logan’s shift had started nearly 10 minutes ago, and they had been fidgeting endlessly ever since. He had been expecting a calm shift, looking at the fish and perhaps informing customers of a few facts. With this new disturbance, however, they thought it best that the customers simply inform themselves using the plaques attached to the walls nearby the tanks. The constantly fading trail of green smoke had their full attention.

It flowed in from the jellyfish exhibit, through the hall Logan was stationed in, and out past into the amphibians and beyond. Logan had come into the hall through the reptile exhibit, only passing the entrance to the amphibians, too engrossed in his thoughts to notice the green smoke. Even if he had noticed, however, he would have had to wait, as he did now, for the end of his shift. It was only his second day at the job, he could not afford to be flagged for missing his shift.

Instead, Logan spent their time pacing the hall, thinking of their soulmate and praying to the stars and the constellations among them that their soulmate would still be in their general vicinity when their shift finished.

Luckily for him, there was no need to wait.

Logan heard several pounding footsteps come in from the reptile exhibit, along with a few muffled apologies. His head snapped up, but not quick enough to dodge before he caught a flash of green out of the corner of his eye and someone slammed directly into him.

“Oh, fuck! Sorry! I’m looking for my–” they paused, looking at the air around Logan, “for you, apparently! Shit, that was a bad first impression. I’m Remus, she/her right now!”

“Logan, he/they. I presume that you are the source of all this green smoke everywhere?”

“So long as you’re the blue! Wait, I'm green? Please tell me I’m a good green!”

Logan laughed, “Well I certainly believe you to be. My apologies for not finding you sooner, I was planning to finish my shift before searching for my soulmate”

Soulmates. That’s what they were. Remus took a good, long look at the person standing in front of her– her Soulmate!–and grinned.

“I was too caught up in the exhibit’s to notice the smoke! They redid the reptile tanks after the last time I was here so I was reading all the new signs they put up!”

“You enjoy learning? Excellent. I am pursuing a degree in Astrophysics, with a minor in astronomy.”

“Ooh, fun! I’m gonna be a marine biologist, I’m writing a research thing on turtles! Did you know that alligator snapping turtles are a thing! They’re like alligator-turtle hybrids and they are insane! Nature is fucked! I wonder what it’d look like if they tore off someone’s head! Would it be like one clean snap, or maybe just a big, gushing tear–”

“Well I do not believe that an alligator snapping turtle would enjoy a human,” Logan interrupted, “it would certainly be interesting to research what effect their jaws and teeth have on their prey. Perhaps we could research it together over dinner?”

Remus looked up in astonishment, “You want to have dinner with me?”

“Why, of course. You are my soulmate, after all, and I do not believe that I would be given a soulmate I would dislike conversing with. The majority of soulmates develop a relationship together, do they not?”

“Well, yes, but– never mind. I’ll talk to Emile–my therapist,” Remus said after a questioning look from Logan, “about it next week.”

“If you are certain.” After a nod from Remus, Logan continued. “Why don’t you tell me more about Alligator snapping turtles? They sound intriguing, and you certainly seem to know a lot about them.”

The two continued to chat for the rest of Logan’s shift, prattling on about alligator snapping turtles, various other reptiles, and certain aspects of space that may or may not have involved explosions and flames.

~~~

It was a few weeks after the two had met, and their relationship was progressing nicely. They were texting or calling daily and meeting regularly as well. A few days ago, Remus had said that their brother wanted to meet Logan. Logan had agreed, as they saw no reason to wait any longer to meet, and as such had arranged to meet today.

Logan and Remus were standing in front of Roman’s door, a small two-bedroom apartment on the third floor of a building in the middle of downtown. Logan was nervously clasping and unclasping his fist, as he often did when he was anxious.

Remus grabbed their hand, squeezing it before whispering to them. “It’s alright, Lo, Roman’s great! Don’t tell him I said this but,” Xe lowered xir voice a bit, “he’s really helped me with, well, everything, and he’s a great brother.” Xe gave Logan’s hand one last squeeze before turning and knocking erratically on the door. “He’s gonna love you.”

There was a quick and sudden tapping of feet behind the door before it swung open to reveal Roman. “Remus!” He said, double-checking xir bracelet colour–a vibrant green almost identical to Remus’s smoke colour, much to Logan’s surprise and Remus’s delight. “And–Logan? You're my brother’s soulmate?”

“Wait, you guys know each other? What the hell?”

“Yes,” Logan said, “We were project partners a couple of months ago. Roman must have moved, as I did not recognize his apartment. Wait–You were the cause of the green smoke!” He said incredulously, turning to Remus.

“I–Yes?” Remus asked. “Were you not aware of my smoke colour which only you can see?”

“No,” Logan replied, a little frustrated, “When I came over for the project, I saw a faint green smoke drifting around the kitchen and sitting room. I asked Roman whether anyone had been in the house in the past few hours, and he said no. I assumed it had been a mirage of some sort, but you were there!”

“You snuck into my apartment?” Roman said, faking outrage. “Why?”

“I wanted cookies!” Xe turned to Logan. “Ro-bro has the best chocolate chip cookie recipe! You need to have some.”

“Actually, I’m all out. You ate them all yesterday, remember?”

“You had a whole day! And this is Logan, My Soulmate, remember?” Remus said.

“I was helping Janus plan for his date? With Virgil? He’s gonna propose?”

“Oooh, yeah! How’d the planning go?” Remus bounced around the hall as he spoke, mind running a mile a minute. “Is he gonna fly a giant banner with Virgil’s face on it across the sky? Ooh, no what about fireworks that say ‘Marry me, Virgil,” except they look like blood splatters and shit! Or or or! What about painting a portrait of Virgil in fake, or real, blood and then on the back it says “Marry me!” Yes, I’m a genius!”

Roman just shook his head. “I’ll tell you inside, c’mon!”

And if years later Logan uses one or more of those exact suggestions to propose to Remus, no one said anything.

[lil-demi-boy]

Eddtober Day 29 - Your Fandom Inspiration

This is gonna be long, so I’m just gonna put it under a cut

(But first, an honorary thank you to everyone in the ask-edd server; y’all make running the blog more than worth it <3)

So the whole point of today’s prompt is to give thanks to those who inspire you

So thank you @cola-losers for pretty much everything- For being a constant source of love and joy and brilliant ideas and dumb puns and a massive help in kickstarting ask-edd and getting it to where it is now.  You’re an amazing person, a wonderful girlfriend, and I don’t think I’d be here without you

Thank you @tashtoosh for being an absolute gem of a QPP - You pick me up when I’m down, you make me feel seen, and your appreciation for my appreciation in music makes me so happy.  I couldn’t ask for more in a friend <3

Thank you @dumbass-lane for putting up with CL and me being idiots for so long, and also thank you for showing background characters the love and care they deserve

Thank you @maybetoday4 for being possibly the biggest Dan simp I’ve met so far /j No but really, the art you submit to ask-edd warms my heart beyond words, and even after all these months, the picture you drew of Dan and Ryan at the railroad tracks is still my lockscreen on my phone

And although I don’t know you personally, thank you @purpaeshoodie and @dudcao for being such talented and amazing artists, blessing this fandom with your works - both of your styles have been very influential in helping me find one for myself that I’m finally satisfied with (and an apology if I didn’t draw your sonas right, I couldn’t quite find ref sheets for either of them-)

[theobsessor1]

Drunken Noodle

Summary: Deceit should know better, going through with another one of Remus’s ideas. He thought it would have been a one time deal, just something for them that night to experiment with his more reptilian side. But he’s starting to regret it with the growing nest of eggs, and horrible uncertainty of feelings swirling in his chest...he might be in some trouble here.

Pairings: mild intrulogical, qpp demus, hinting at Lociet

Warnings: drinking, alcohol. hinting at slight alcoholic problem.

Word count: 3087

previous chapters ch.1, ch.2, (read on ao3)

(wish to support me buy me a coffee :3)

Chapter 3 of “Say Something” series

Deceit huffs, sitting partially slouched over the dinning table as he sips from his wine glass, munching on gummy rats that Remus had summoned him to help brighten his sour mood. Said creative side was currently sitting across from him going on about something or another.

Deceit wasn’t paying attention, just enough to mindlessly nod when needed, letting the side jabber and get his energy out while the snake side sulked. Hmm...maybe he should pay Remy and Emile a visit. He hadn’t gone to see them since...well, it’s been awhile. 

It took him a moment to realize that Remus had stopped talking, The Duke had turned to stare at the stairs of the subconscious that led up to the mindscape...Standing at the bottom of them was Logan, he was just there! Casually looking around the room where he stood. It’s quite a surprising site to see, no wonder it drove Remus speechless. Well besides the fact that he’s obviously rather fond of the other side. After a moment, Deceit clears his throat. “Can we not help you?” 

“Actually, yes. I wanted to talk to you about something.” Logan straightens his tie and clears his throat, brushing off the fact he hadn’t realized the two sides were at the table. “Oh?” 

“Well more specifically, the events that occurred during our discussion with Thomas earlier today. I wanted to apologise on the behalf of the other. They were rather dismissive of you, despite you bringing up some rather valid points. I..” Logan coughs. “You can say I understand to a degree the feeling of being brushed over, so to speak, and that I inf act do not condone such behavior especially to someone who is actually contributing and trying to help.” 

Deceit has to take a moment to collect his thoughts and form proper words through the fuzzy haze of alcohol... This almost seems like some joke. “...Thank you for the apology, though it’s rather unnecessary. You're not the one that needs to apologise, if you want me to be honest you deserve an apology more than me” he points at Logan with an unimpressed lift of his brow. 

The spectacled side sighs “Regardless, I bring the apology and regret that I had not attempted to get them to listen to you.” “It’s whatever. I appreciate it I guess.” Deceit mumbles, waving a hand concedingly and taking another sip of wine clearly not very concerned with this conversation. 

“I could tear out their tongues for you!” Remus offers, way too excited at the idea. Logan frowns shaking his head “That’s...very thoughtful of you Remus, but I don’t think that’ll be necessary.” 

“It would be more fun to shove them down the stairs, like a couple of really annoying slinkies” Deceit adds mumbling into his drink Remus snickers nodding while Logan shakes his head “I appreciate your offer and suggestions, but that’s still a no. We want them to listen, not get them hurt.” 

Deceit stands from the table swaying almost like a snake influenced by a snake charmer. “Well, that is much easier said than done. They’re bound to get hurt before they start listening to anyone.” He picks up his glass intent to make his way to the couch “You’ve said your apology, you don’t have to stick around any longer.” Logan raises a finger, opening his mouth to speak only to close it as he squints at the snake side as Remus gets up coming behind Deceit and scooping him up into his arms, spawning tentacles from his back to help properly support the side in his arms. Using one of said tentacles to slip the wine glass away from the snake sides reach. “Is he drunk?” 

Deceit hisses, attempting to wiggle from Remus’s grasp and snatch his drink back “I’m not drunk...yet...I think.” 

“...Do you intend to get drunk?” The logical side crosses his arms, frowning at them. Deceit shrinks down on himself guiltily 

“...Maybe…” 

Logan’s frown deepens as he shakes his head “I’m getting you a glass of water, have either of you eaten anything?”

Remus carries a definitely not pouting Deceit over to the couch where Logan had pointed for them to sit as the snake side replies “I’ve only eaten a few gummies so far.” 

“I ate ass!” The duke enthusiastically answers plopping onto the couch and still holding the grumpy snake side protectively in his arms and tentacles.

“He means a peach.” 

Logan huffs heading into the kitchen, making himself at home as he goes about sifting through the cabinets and fridge “I’m going to make the two of you something proper to eat, do either of you have any dietary restrictions?” 

Remus nods with a bounce, he knows the answer to that! “DeeDee doesn’t like mushy stuff ‘n I don’t like citrus.” Logan nods, filing that information away for later. He has managed to find a box of noodles and some tomato sauce, spaghetti is easy to make and hopefully satisfying to the two sides. It grows quiet for a while save for the sounds of Logan cooking, filling a pot with water and setting on the stove to boil with the noodles. 

Remus plays with Deceit’s hair keeping himself occupied as they await the meal. Something must be up, why else would the logical side have decided to suddenly care to apologize to him, to care if he was drunk or for that matter make them food?? Wasn’t he the one that usually would argue that they didn’t need it?

Deceit can’t help but squint suspiciously at the side, “You’re totally not planning something?” he hisses flicking his tongue out with his words. 

“Well, I”m planning to feed you some spaghetti and try to get you to drink some water to help keep you hydrated from your consumption of alcohol.” The snake side huffs knowing that was the logical side's so called plan. But he wants to know the real one! He opens his mouth to say as much but Logan continues “Maybe re-discuss points from earlier conversation with the others and Thomas since, well, neither of us got to share our opinions on the matter...If that is what you are asking?” 

Deceit sits up, turning around on the couch and propping himself up on his elbows to look at the logical side, eyes narrowed. That can’t possibly be all. There’s gotta be something else here, he’s sure of it. 

Remus finishes the braid he’s been working on, wiggling happily at his work before starting another. “I could think of some tasty things to do instead off boring ol’ talk!~” 

The snake side sighs “Remu-” “Oh! I tried that mushroom thing from Hannible! You gotta come check out the corpses with me!” 

“Re-” “The roots really did spread through the whole body! I got one of them to be oozing-” 

Deceit huffed snapping his fingers to focus the creative side’s attention, the duke’s mouth clicking shut and heading whipping around to find the sudden source of noise.

“I know you want to talk to him about all those wild ideas of yours dear, but do you think you can wait till after I interrogate him?” 

“Oh! Yeah, I’ll wait!” Remus nods his head like a bobble head, stilling as he goes back to focusing on playing with Deceit’s hair, a third braid in the making...he might be attempting to stick an eyeball in it...or a tooth. 

Logan adjusts his glasses as his brows furrowed in confusion, the glasses fogged slightly from the steam of the cooking pasta “Interrogate me? What for?” 

“Well see Logan, you never come down to this part of Thomas’s mind. Nor really have you ever shown an interest in our care, save for Remus of course when he’s visiting you but that's just a given.” he makes an offhanded gesture to Remus “So tell me, what is your true motive for all this.” 

Logan pauses in his task of stirring the pasta sauce “My motive?” 

“Yes your motive, I may be intoxicated but I can still tell when something is suspiciousss.” 

Logan tilts his head at the snake side, beginning to absentmindedly stir the pot again. “Have I been acting suspicious. I do suppose a divergence from usual patterns would make something seem suspicious and put you on edge.” he thinks aloud. 

He shakes his head, turning the heat off the stove and mixing the sauce into the noodles. “I have no secret motive, no ulterior plan, I am merely tired of the treatment and order of things...of course that’s now paired with the fact that I am concerned about your alcohol consumption.” 

Deceit rolled his eyes “Well the whole treatment and order is going to be harder to change than just coming over for a visit…” he moves from Remus’s grasp to lean over the back of the couch “And my so called alcohol consump-consumption is fine! I didn’t have a lick of it for a couple of weeks!” Of course that was because he wasn't about to drink such stuff while he was preg- for reasons, wasn’t drinking it for specific reasons he will not ever talk about...yes.

...for a pink and yellow, brown speckled reason currently in his bedroom hidden with the other one. 

Logan hummed, not convinced as he made plates, putting the finished spaghetti on dishes before carrying them to the table “Either way, you two are eating and then getting to bed. No shenanigans or schemes, whatever it is you two do when left alone down here.” 

Deceit can’t help but pout at that, he doesn't have plans for the night but still, he doesn't want to be told what to do and be put to bed like some child thank you very much. 

Remus finishes with the sides hair and scoops him into his arms again. “I can walk myself!” 

“I know” :D

Stuck being carried it seems, the snake side just sighs, there’s no use fighting Remus, they’re both touch starved as is and the dukes pentiant for just snatching and carrying people around is a constant. 

He gets gently deposited into his usual place setting at the head of the table, Remus sitting by his side and eagerly digging into the food...he does notably try at an attempt to be polite and use a fork as he stuffs his face tonight. 

Deceit sulks conjuring himself a wine glass by his bowl, eyes widening when Logan snatches it away and puts a glass of water down. “Excuse me?” 

“No more wine tonight. Water” 

Remus giggles at his expression, the snake side not used to someone trying to boss him around like this. 

He can’t help lifting a challenging eyebrow at the logical side “No wine?” Deceit waves his hand over the glass of water turning it into a glass of whiskey on the rocks “Fine.” 

Logan raises an eyebrow back, clearly unimpressed and frowning. He gives a huff taking the glass, poofing it out of existence and putting a glass of water down once again. 

Deceit flicks his wrist changing the water to vodka, his eyes sparkling with amusement as he watches Logan. The logical side huffs “enough” he snaps turning the drink back into water “you will drink the water, eat and then we can assist you to your room for re-” “No!” 

Logan sputters to a stop startled by Deceit’s sudden shout and looking to the snake side with bewilderment.

Deceit blinks before flushing lightly as he looks down at his place sheepishly, he hadn’t even realized he had stood, now seating himself back down. “Apologies...I um I would just prefer not to be in my room tonight.” he pokes at his plate with his fork hoping Logan wont see through his lie

“R-right.” Logan clears his throat, adjusting his tie in that lil tick of his “Well, then um we can make you comfortable on the couch then? Will that suffice?” 

Deceit quickly nods “yes, the couch will be fine.” 

The dinner seems to be rather dull after that, Remus and Logan going back to discussing what Remus had done in the imagination inspired off of the Hannibal episodes they have watched together. Janus watches them chatter fondly, the two animatedly talking and gesturing back and forth...It’s nice seeing the two enjoy themselves like this. Especially Logan, it’s not often you get to see the logical side light up like this. 

With a small hum he stands with his empty bowl taking it over to the sink without a word, not wanting to interrupt. 

He tries to walk past the table without being noticed, if he can sneak past he may be able to make an escape to the imagination and to his two favorite traits. Of course things never go as planned, why would they. Remus immediately perks up and the creaking of his chair is the only warning Janus gets before the creative side pounces, pinning him to the ground.

Janus sighs with a groan “Really? Remus why-” they both pause with confusion and looking to the dining table, hearing a small giggle and a snort. 

Logan was watching them, a hand covering his mouth to stifle the sound of a laugh, eyes full of amusement and fondness...they made the logical side laugh?!

Remus's eyes sparkle surprised that he got Logan to genuinely laugh! He beams excitedly at the logical side “You laughed!” 

Logan blinks, his cheeks turning a light shade of pink as he quickly lowers his hands “I-I um think you misheard.” 

Remus shakes his head quickly scooping up Janus and holding him out to Logan like one holds a feral cat away from themselves “No! I heard it! J-eh Dee-Dee did too!” 

Janus gives Logan a disgruntled look but nods, not appreciating how he’s being held “I did here it too. You do realize you can’t exactly lie to me right?” he flicks out his tongue at Logan as if to emphasize he can sense them. 

Logan sighs fiddling with his tie “Remus I don’t think it’s good for you to hold Janus like that. Why don’t you get him to the couch and I can get him some pillows and blankets from his room.” he suggests quickly in an attempt to change the subject. 

Remus nods, eyes still sparkling as he pulls Janus closer, of course it's a bit of an issue when the snake side is wriggling and squirming as if trying to escape. “No! Don’t you dare go into my room!” 

Remus takes a hurried step back conjuring his tentacles again to try and keep a hold of the snake side who's baring his fangs at Logan and hissing angrily. 

Logan flinches, face scrunching with confusion as he quickly puts his hands up “I apologize, I didn’t mean to over step! I won’t go into your room if it makes you uncomfortable.” 

Janus calms, going still in Remus’s arms looking a bit disgruntled as he gives one last soft hiss at Logan. 

Logan huffs and Remus turns around so Janus can’t look at Logan anymore “Welp I think Logan had the right idea, someone had too many silly drinks, bed time!” 

Janus whines “I did not have too many, and I'm not tired. Put me down.” 

Remus shakes his head dropping Janus right onto the couch “Nope, it's bedtime! I’m putting you to bed and ain’t nothing you doing about it.” Janus makes more unhappy noises before squeaking at the sudden weight of Remus flopping on top of him. 

“You're not even going to let me get comfortable?” 

“Nope” >:3

Janus huffs glaring at the ceiling of the living room resigned. 

Logan smiles making his way over “Maybe it would be best to let him get comfortable, I don’t think I’ll be able to sit with you otherwise.” he pauses “That is of course if it's alright if I stay?” 

Janus sighs as Remus quickly scoots off him “Might as well, you’ve made yourself at home thus far.” he sits up to move to the side so that Remus and Logan can probably cuddle, only to stiffen up when he’s suddenly squished between the two sides. 

Remus wiggles some before snapping his fingers and changing them all into comfortable t shirts and pajama shorts before wrapping Janus up in a blanket “You gotta wrap Dee up in a blanket so he can burrow and stay warm, otherwise you get a grumpy snek who can’t sleep.” 

Janus sputters glaring at Remus from his cozy blanket burrito“Don’t give away my weaknesses!” 

Remus ignores him, smiling at Logan “and squish him! He sleeps best when squished” 

Janus hisses as Remus leans on him more, and makes an offended noise when he is shushed by the creative side. And again when Logan leans on him next. He’s definitely squished between the two sides now. 

No escape! Damn it!

Remus snickers resting his chin on top of Janus’s head as Janus yawns, his forked tongue curling. Janus huffs giving a weak shove at the creative side. 

Logan watches fondly “You two seem...rather close? But I suppose that’s a given with the two of you living together down here for so long?” 

Remus nods “Something like that, and well-” he shrugs unsure what the right words would be “ I don’t know, I’m wild and feral and got no boundaries, and Dee’s the exact opposite, balance each other, I guess.” 

Logan nods, watching amusedly as Janus’s eyes grow heavy. 

“You would think that we would hate each other but we kinda just found our own system of things together that works for us…” Virgil used to be part of that too, but well...guess yeah win some you lose some or...whatever that saying is.

Logan hums resting his head near Remus’s “and...you don’t suppose...that I could possibly join this system? I um” Logan clears his throat looking away nervously “I um mean more so if its alright I keep visiting for the most part. You always visit me an-” “yes” 

Logan pauses looking to Remus 

“Yes, you can come visit, it’s not like we can stop you” Remus smirks at him “think of yourself as an honorary member here, i'll make ya a badge and everything.” 

Logan smiles before they both blink and look down, hearing soft sleeping noises coming from Janus, a lil bit of his tongue sticking out as he sleeps. 

Remus snickers at that, getting himself more comfy. "Heheh… sleeping snek…"

[courtroom-revolutionnaire]

i kinda forgot i had this blog but today sucks so i guess this is a good time to use it. cutting off the source of my stress and anxiety for the last month was nice, except a lot came up with my qpp last night and now my twin brother cut me off. he hates me so much and all i know is he’s taking it out on me because i’m “everything he wants to be but can’t be.” so that sucks ass. i’m trying to stay offline for a bit too which is hard for me because i constantly need to be around others but right now i just need to be alone and i know that. i’m in so much pain and god it sucks. i’m so tired.

[compositionnote]

9/23/17

Say what you want, I really like Watsky.

Today a lot of us talked out issues with memes, which was really great. I’m thankful for Sans to be able to talk to people. They let me out today. They let us out of work early today. We have two days left to clean the apartment and it’s freaking everyone out. I’m choosing not to think about it but all we can think about is that we’re going to fail somehow and be evicted. That we’re going to miss something or neglect something and that we just wont be able to see it, but it’ll be glaringly obvious and horrible. We keep hearing the grandma’s voice in our head shouting at us and screaming. A few of us feel hands on us in gross ways and Yami keeps feeling like he’s being held under water by cousin J---. He was just playing, but it set it in motion.

Someone keeps talking about how we should get pregnant, that our life will be better when we have someone who will accept our love easier. We aren’t going to listen to them, but we all have the thought in our mind somehow that we should. Except we all know we shouldn’t. It’s rough and we feel like we cant talk about that with anyone, because nikkleback may be unable to due to health problems and their host really wants to carry one day, and for memes its one of their top fears. Willowsystem likely can’t carry either due to past cancer treatments, so we feel horribly selfish even thinking of it, and Sam sometimes doubts his gender because of it, making him extremely dysphoric.

Natasha is excited to be so close with meme’s Barnes, it brings her some kind of wonderful feeling knowing that shes loved for who she is and not for what she can provide. She loves him a lot, like a brother, but won’t admit it. She wants to say big brother because he’s older but its more akin to the twin that was born first. first just happened to be a few decades.

Yami had to be muzzled today during a fit, and found that he, as well as James, finds the face pressure deeply comforting. He’s keeping the muzzle. Yami also keeps putting off asking Nyugi about being QPP’s because he’s nervous and shy.

Today we don’t know what’s real, and we keep thinking we’re reality jumping. Our head keeps getting hazy for no real reason and sometimes we’re spelling words completely wrong phonetically for some reason, simple words like “words” and “reason”. We keep getting dizzy and suddenly jarred and it feels like we’re somewhere else. for that reason we don’t know what’s actually real or not, what’s just make believe and pretend. Its hard to conceptualize horrors in the world and a few of us have taken to pretending that we’re in our source. Sam is hiding his head in his kinshifts but he feels fake in every one of them.

Speaking of Sam, he’s jealous of meme’s Sam and a little upset. With Winchester being a fictive of the character he’s kin with, who ended up venting using a song he cried himself to sleep to, he found himself being a little bitter about it, but feels bad. Today, Sam cried about losing everyone he loved, including Linear, TJ and Covin, who he misses dearly. He doesn’t know how to make friends. None of us do.

I worked really hard on the banner and icon and everything. I chose my name because I think Nixxiom from Planet Dolan is cool. I hope that tomorrow is better. Everyone can make their own small posts, but big posts like these are mine. Goodnight. 

-Nix