#source: parks and recreation

[danganronpafakes]

The thing about youth culture is, I don't understand it.

Source: Parks and Recreation (“Pawnee Zoo”)

[overheard-at-hogwarts]

Percy: What are you doing?!

George: Burning these awful dress robes.

Percy: Those are mine! I wanted those back!

Fred: Well, frankly, you should have thought of that before we burned them.

[pool-spidey]

We’re all thrilled!!

[paperclipbracelet]

The Doctor: Jo, I'm here to rescue you from the Master.

Jo: Thank god, I thought I was going to be trapped in this cell he put me in forever.

Jo: *finishes hot meal, leaves bed made, puts book on shelf, turns stereo off, fireplace off, takes complimentary shampoo and chocolate*

Jo: Can we pass the gift shop on the way out? I've got a coupon to spend.

[kermitsleftnipple]

Eddie: Steve, if you have a secret, you have to tell me. That’s the whole point of dating! You get twice the secrets!

[incorrect-sheith-quotes]

Shiro: I know you’re going to take this the wrong way, but can I talk to you for a second?

Keith: You can do anything to me for any number of seconds.

[incorrect-nivanfield-quotes]

Chris: I know you’re going to take this the wrong way, but can I talk to you for a second?

Piers: You can do anything to me for any number of seconds.

[tf2-but-incorrect]

Miss Pauling: and I need you to give, like, even a 15% effort.

Sniper: 12%.      

Miss Pauling: 15. For god’s sake, I’m asking for 15% effort. It’s not supposed to be a negotiation

[sariahsue]

Marinette: [walks into an unexplained room full of animals]

Marinette: Adrien?

Adrien: Hey, Marinette!

Adrien: Good morning! How did you sleep? I adopted 32 cats. Do you want pancakes?

[incorrectbatfamquotes]

Jason Todd: If there is credit to take, I will humbly take it. But if there is blame, it’s Replacement’s fault.

[incorrect-losers]

Bev: So what do you think?

Eddie: Oh, I wasn’t listening but I strongly agree with Bill

Bev: …

Bev: He’s not even here

[incorrectrotgquotes]

Bunnymund: Don't call me 'kangaroo'.

Jack Frost: Ah! That's what you took away from this?!

[overheard-at-hogwarts]

Lily: Oh, James. You're fine, but you're simple.

[fandom-animals]

*Guillermo walks into the fancy room. Lazslo is in there sitting on the couch.*

Lazslo: Hello, Gizmo, how long have you been sleeping with Nandor?

Guillermo: W-What?

Lazslo: How long have you been sleeping with Nandor?

Guillermo: That's disgusting and wrong- I don't even get- I've never had sex with anyone, anywhere. It's none of your- This is an OUTRAGE! Who do I call!

Nandor, sneaking up from behind Guillermo to surprise him: Hey!

Guillermo and Nandor: Hey, hey, hey...

Nandor, notices Lazslo: Hey, Lazslo! You're just who I was looking for- are you- did you forget the, um- did you- c-can I get that thing? Can we just, uh, did you bring it? This isn't convincing.

[paperclipbracelet]

Dutch: Listen up, everyone! As you know, the Pinkertons seem to be watching our every move so from now on, we will be using code names. You may address me as Mango One!

Dutch: Miss. Grimshaw, codename Been There Done That.

Dutch: Molly is Currently Doing That.

Dutch: Javier! It Happened Once In A Dream.

Dutch: Kieran - If I Had To Pick An O'Driscoll.

Kieran: I ain't an O'Dris-

Dutch: And Arthur is.....Mango Two.

Arthur, relieved: Oh thank god.

[kermitsleftnipple]

[Morning after a party]

Eddie: Oh my God, I'm so hungover. I've never been this hungover.

Steve: I feel great. I ran 5K this morning.

Eddie: Really?

Steve: No, I threw up in the shower.