#the social aspect is important but mostly

[glass--beach]

hi do you like ok computer (1997)

because i really just don't get it (especially as the second-best album of all time) but i reeeally want to & i respect your opinion on that a lot

yea that album kinda changed the course of my life lol. wall of text incoming

first - don’t let rym or aoty or whatever tell you what’s good and what isn’t, everybody’s got their own taste & criticisms that go against the grain are very important!! i will say anything that’s that consistently highly rated across different websites & publications is probably undeniably significant and worth listening to. whether listening feels like discovering a new favorite or sitting through a history lesson is where taste comes in. it’s important to interrogate the canon too as there is an enormous amount of implicit bias in what even gets in front of critics and in the metrics they grade music by. review aggregate sites have democratized this process a bit & all the good and bad of democracy has come with that lol.

so, the album gets praised for a couple of reasons - its innovative production, its commentary on the historical zeitgeist, and the pop appeal of much of the songwriting.

production - the album makes heavy use of cutting edge effects units, digital editing, computer trackers, sampling, and even features little bits of voice synthesis. most of it is stuff that had existed in music before radiohead, artists like aphex twin (and much of the rest of warp records’ 90s catalog) and bjork were ahead of the curve in a lot of the aesthetic aspects of okc and had influenced radiohead a lot, which is even more evident on their followup kid a. radiohead was not breaking new ground in using these sounds, but they were among the first to put it all in a rock context, taking cues from the weirder cuts on the beatles’ white album, the experimental “krautrock” band can, and miles davis’ classic jazz fusion album bitches brew.

context - radiohead had grown up during the decline of much of the social democratic programs that had helped to facilitate the education and performing careers of much of their early influences such as joy division and the smiths. by the time okc was being written they had lived through the austerity of the thatcher era, the fall of the soviet union, and now were watching the labour party turn increasingly neoliberal under tony blair. there was a general sentiment in the west that the progress of history had slowed or even stopped in favor of the neoliberal order. at the same time, tech was booming and computers were starting to find their way into more aspects of daily life. the album imagines a boring dystopia, where machines are rabidly advancing but humans are stuck in stasis. a major connecting theme is infrastructure - the airbag through which thom yorke is “born again,” the “cracks in the pavement,” the family politics that separate romeo and juliet in exit music, the mechanical voice of fitter happier giving contradictory directions for maintaining the status quo. even the escapist fantasy of no surprises comes in the form of carbon monoxide. and then, the record ends with the “ding” of an appliance that has completed its task.

songwriting - the band’s previous album the bends really is a pop masterpiece. i recommend it to anybody who wants to get into radiohead but doesn’t vibe with their later work. okc expands that compositional style through, for one thing, the more apparent influence of classical music on tracks like paranoid android or the Chopin homage exit music; let down even features polymetric layering characteristic of Steve Reich. it also features some songs that are too good to even need to push the envelope much, like karma police or one of my favorites, no surprises, which seems to reference the beach boys’ wouldn’t it be nice or the velvet underground’s sunday morning.

to be honest, i like okc mostly because it really spoke to me at a formative time in my life, when i was like 15 and felt heavily disconnected from the world around me. the album deals with those feelings in a very different context but it’s a feeling many people can relate to for many different reasons - i was closeted in a conservative culture, not a depressed british rock star lol. it also was an excellent gateway into many of the bands’ influences, who are also favorites of mine now. most people who love the album don’t really go as deep as i like to with understanding it, but maybe what i said here will give you something else to listen for, idk. maybe you just gave me an excuse to infodump about an album i love lol :)

[fjordfolk]

I know you said awhile back that Luna was a little bit different after surgery. She’s always been my favorite of the gang (maybe because I started following you way back in 2016, when she was a puppy), do you still think it’s affected her? Your post about her coat brought it to mind

2020 was a really rough year for Luna. Between the initial slip that uncovered her PL issues and the 2nd surgery being pushed back due to covid, she spent most of the year under some form of pain management and rehab. I really can't find a better word for it than traumatization. Habits she picked up during this will reappear from time to time, she refuses and panics on a lot of types of flooring. I don't think she'll ever be completely rid of that. And it aged her - she went from being an active and cheerful youngster to a wary couch potato in just a few months.

You know what's really helped, though? This thing:

Since Melis came along, Luna has been doing much better. She communicates clearer, she's less hesitant, she's more active and runs (!) like she hasn't in years. I don't think she'll fully get over the floor issues, but between the Great Slip and Melis coming home, Luna had to be carried through the hallway to the bedroom - she wouldn't even set foot there. Now she puts herself to bed every night and walks out on her own every morning.

She's not 100% back to exactly how she was before, but she's a lot closer now to the dog she would've been if the knees hadn't caused problems. And although little sisters can be real pests sometimes, she's a very happy dog.

[icewindandboringhorror]

everyday I miss miitomo .. aaa

[brutalmasks]

How physically affectionate is your muse with their partner?

hello, hello, @vulpesse!! thank you so much for the ask :D it is VERY much appreciated, my friend, and i hope you've been having a great day so far <33 BUT OMG. i love this question, tbh. because now i can talk about how physical touch is actually one of bunny mask's love languages... especially when she's in a romantic relationship with someone. so if i were to put a number on how physically affectionate bunny is with her lover, then i would say about an eight, which i know is pretty darn high but in her opinion; being able to be intimate with someone to the point where you can constantly hold their hand and/or snuggle up to them is like heaven to her. and i think part of this might be due to the difference in temperatures between say, her and a human, if they were to find themselves in a relationship together — as although bunny mask does not run cold, she does have a lower resting temperature than humanity as a whole due to her nature as a spirit. like this may be a bit of a weird analogy, but stay with me here: imagine that feeling you get whenever you pull something out that just got done in the dryer and hold it to your skin. the amount of warmth that comes off of clothes in that situation is pretty high and thus, it usually feels pretty good whenever you touch it, right?

well, that same kind of logic applies to bunny mask, as she will quite literally compare her partner to a heater if the difference between their temperatures is drastic enough LOL. and so, if you were to ever get into a relationship with her, expect there to be lots of times where she will just curl up next to you with your skin touching / ask if you could cuddle with her. bunny mask also does this out of just a desire to be close to her partner and because she may, or may not be slightly mystified by them in a ' if i don't touch you right now, then i'm afraid you might disappear right before my very eyes, because you're so perfect. so i HAVE to do it ' kind of way haha. bunny in general is also a being that operates outside of social norms, so although it may seem odd to some, she is definitely the type to want to hold her lover's hand wherever they may go as i was talking about earlier. but of course, bunny mask would always try to take a step back from this if they seemed uncomfortable with this in any way. though bunny mask is certainly not one to shy away from PDA, so if the person that she is with is comfortable with it, she will absolutely do things like kiss them in different spots on their face whenever she feels as if she is just consumed by her love for them or will put her arm around their shoulder's / her head on their shoulder.

so, in summary, whenever bunny mask falls in love with someone and gets into a relationship with them — she usually falls HARD and would want to be as close to them as physically possible. plus, despite her having a humanlike anatomy herself, she just adores hearing her partner's heartbeat. so whenever they are just chilling in bed together, bunny mask would and could press her ear to their chest to hear it, granted that they are some sort of being with a heartbeat like hers. but anyhow, i hope this answered your question, my dear and thanks again for the ask! you are honestly a real one for sending it in :3 oh, OH, and one more thing. bunny mask has never really been hugged before, so i think that as soon as she discovers what a hug is, she will absolutely be diving in for one whenever she has really missed her partner + is experiencing any kind of strong emotion towards them tbh. so yeah,, i LOVE that for her, truthfully

[harmoonix]

𓆩♡𓆪 𝔾𝕚𝕒𝕟𝕥𝕤 II 𓆩♡𓆪

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~ This time ya gonna see how we do it like that ~ ──────────────────────────────

𓆩♡𓆪 Sagittarius Sun, Mars, Venus or Mercury will make you such a sassy person, literally "savage" the definition of these placements

𓆩♡𓆪 When you have Mars aspecting the Midheaven people will see you as a competition, they'll try to compete with you

𓆩♡𓆪 Cancer Mars and Moon can have issues with understanding their feelings, but that doesn't stop them from expressing themselves and getting better

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We're wide awake now, our eyes are wide open

We're running this world, we keeping it turning

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𓆩♡𓆪 Aries and Aquarius Lilith are 2 rebellious forces of nature, Lilith may act like she needs to change something in herself here, it can be in her personality

𓆩♡𓆪 Saturn in the same house as Lilith or conjuncting Lilith can be a dangerous placement because Lilith here won't listen to anybody and will do her own thing. She can feel chained up

𓆩♡𓆪 The aura a Capricorn gives is always dark, I love how Capricorn can resemble the dark "goat", Capricorn always gave Maleficent vibes especially when it comes to being ambitious

𓆩♡𓆪 Mercury/Gemini in the 5H can make you to be attracted be multiple people or to have more crushes, doesn't always have to be a relationship

𓆩♡𓆪 Leo Sun, Risings and Venus are the embodiment of a queen, for some reason I always think of Cleopatra of Egypt everytime I think about Leo placements ( Leo Venus gives highly Bastet vibes)

𓆩♡𓆪 If you have a "yang" moon sign like air or fire signs and you have Pluto aspecting the Moon, the aspects will make your moon to act more dark/misterious than already it is

𓆩♡𓆪 Lilith in Gemini/3rd house will tend to talk more harshly if they're feeling threatened by a person, especially if they want to call that person out for something

𓆩♡𓆪 Everytime I see someone trying to look for a "loyal relationship" I always think they must have Saturn - Venus aspects or Saturn in Libra or Saturn in the 5H or 7H!! major loyal relationship vibes

𓆩♡𓆪 Lilith in Leo. I love this placement but its bad trait can be that, they love the attention and if they don't get it. These natives can get mad or just annoyed about it

𓆩♡𓆪 Saturn in Scorpio or in the 8H talks about a major want or "need" for feeling comfortable with their intimacy or sexuality, they just want to feel good and protected in the same time

𓆩♡𓆪 Virgo Moons aspected by Lilith can act "unholy" which can indicate being more critical than usual maybe more strict even with yourself, is important to give yourself peace of mind

𓆩♡𓆪 Asteroid Sirene (1009) aspecting Saturn can make you to be more attracted in older people than you, sexually, romantically etc

𓆩♡𓆪 Asteroid Sirene (1009) aspecting the Sun will Influence the native to be more aware of their personality and aura, like you know how attractive and beautiful you can be

𓆩♡𓆪 Asteroid Eros (433) in Cancer/4H or Cancer Degrees 4°, 16°, 28° will mostly attract a partner who will be a familist/a person who puts family over everything/traditional spouse too

𓆩♡𓆪 Asteroid Eros (433) in Virgo/6H or Virgo Degrees 6°, 18° will mostly attract a very hardworking spouse, someone will know how important the "devotion" to the world

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We're living like giants

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𓆩♡𓆪 People don't talk enough about how Mars - Jupiter and Venus - Jupiter aspects can make you horny 24/7, not gonna lie their sexual hormones are crazy

𓆩♡𓆪 Saturn in Gemini or the 3rd house natives will find themselves constantly pushed into situations where the need to have good communication skills will become apparent

𓆩♡𓆪 Gemini Risings are remarcabile in making themselves socially liked by others, I admire their social skills and their friendship commitment

𓆩♡𓆪 Saturn in the 1st/10th and 6th house are big glow up placements, for yourself, career and even your mental health

𓆩♡𓆪 Asteroid Eros (433) in Libra/7H/ or at 7°, 19° degrees, can we talk a bit about how romantic these placements are?? Eros is getting into "addicted" phase here and is just so in love with everything

𓆩♡𓆪 Venus in Virgo/Venus in the 6th or Venus at 6°. 18° degrees can have quality time and acts of service as their love languages and they're honestly trying their best at making people feeling seen and comforted

𓆩♡𓆪 Neptune/Jupiter/Uranus in the 1st house can he gifted with spiritual gifts, they're usually much more spiritual than other people even since from childhood

𓆩♡𓆪 People don't talk enough about how Moon in the 9th house can make you tied to a certain culture or tradition. It can be yours or others, but you'll get so tied in that culture that you'll adore it

𓆩♡𓆪 I have my 7H lord in the 9H in my sidereal/vedic chart and my friends always joke about me marrying someone religious (I PRAY to not), im more spiritual than religious and marrying someone religious will be the end for me (They say I'm gonna marry a priest help 😭😭😭)

𓆩♡𓆪 Pluto in the 11th house will make the native more powerful in their communities, or in their social group, you gain power with community

𓆩♡𓆪 Asteroid Eros (433) in Capricorn/10th house or at 10°, 22° will attract that type of "boss" figure spouse in their lives, it can be a dominant figure too and very influential in their lives

𓆩♡𓆪 Moon or Venus in the 6H are the best placements to have if you love animals 🐶🐈🐨, I adore these placements in the 6H (can't relate I don't have any) but I love seeing them in a chart

𓆩♡𓆪 Some obvs. for your 1H lord in other house

1st house lord in the 6H > Prioritize your health and your capacity for work/service, taking a break is vital for you

1st house lord in the 2nd H > your self worth and is more precious than any gold or diamonds from this earth

1st house lord in the 7H > Relationships are healthy and important for a human but don't forget to prioritize yourself as well

1st house lord in the 5H > Finding your joy and your own talents is the best thing you can do

1st house lord in the 9H > Don't let others to decide your fate, you can do it by yourself! Try to be more free than ever

1st house lord in the 12H > Your subconscious is as powerful as your spirit, you learn that your destiny will always be by your side

𓆩♡𓆪 Having Saturn as your asc ruler like Cap or Aqua risings is not an easy job because Saturn is teaching you how to deal with life independently

𓆩♡𓆪 Venus in Aquarius/Venus at 11°, 23° degrees, people get so easily attached by you with this placement, you like "one of them" and the community support is always so heart warming

𓆩♡𓆪 Saturn or Mercury in the 6H can make you anxious at your job, not that "severe" anxiety but still stressing

𓆩♡𓆪 Lilith in Virgo/6H can be full of storms, because they can feel drained and tired from others energy, people tend to ignore or forget about their needs and these natives can end up in a bad mood

𓆩♡𓆪 Neptune/Pisces/Moon or Cancer in the 2H can get emotionally attached by the things they own. It can be a sentimental relationship with material things

──────────────────────────────

Ya thought that we were weak but we coming right back

This time ya gonna see how we do it like that

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𓆩♡𓆪 Saturn aspecting the Moon, especially in harsh aspects, has a hard time dealing with their emotions, is okay to let your feeling out sometimes

𓆩♡𓆪 Asteroid Sirene (1009) having no aspects or sitting empty in a chart can indicate a native who didn't discovered their sexual potential yet

𓆩♡𓆪 Pisces + Taurus combo in a chart can indicate a native who can be a very dreamy and artistic person, their talent can be insane

𓆩♡𓆪 Saturn/Pluto and Lilith in the 4H can grow in very strict households, and it is very important to heal and grow and to NOT be like them and to not fall in their footsteps in case they're toxic

𓆩♡𓆪 Jupiter aspecting the ascendant native is looking hella good because you'll have Jupiter blessing your body. If you don't love your body, start to do so

𓆩♡𓆪 Sagittarius Risings lining up to be some of the most luckiest people in the world because Jupiter, the planet of luck, is rulling their 1st house. The same can apply if you are Jupiter Dominant

𓆩♡𓆪 Having Jupiter aspecting the Neptune makes you the most dreamiest person ever, never stop believing in your dreams, or your magic will fade away literally

𓆩♡𓆪 Sagittarius + Libra combo in a chart can make you to be more bold, wild, sexy, pretty than ever, shine brighter than the diamonds with Venus - Jupiter as your rulers

𓆩♡𓆪 Scoprio + Virgo/Capricorn in a chart can make the native enchanted, mysterious, and even more magnetic. You can have vampire energy

𓆩♡𓆪 North Node aspecting Saturn gives the native the power to go through their obstacles in life, is indeed an indicator for having karmic lessons, but you gonna rise victorious out of this

𓆩♡𓆪 Venus aspecting Neptune or Pluto makes you fall in love with the 'bad' guys. They can be toxic, manipulators, and yes, extremely hot, but that was not the point ;)

𓆩♡𓆪 Sun aspecting Mars natives have that unique energy to make everything possible, they are very ambitious and will make it to happen

𓆩♡𓆪 Mars in the same house as Mercury or Mars aspecting Mercury will be very sassy/dramatic in their talks/conversations, even sarcastic sometimes

𓆩♡𓆪 12H in Leo/South Node in Leo/Saturn in Leo/8H in Leo gives "royalty up to my veins." They can have a presence of a royalty in other people's lives

𓆩♡𓆪 Pluto or Lilith aspecting the ascendant gives major jealousy vibes when it comes to your looks/appearance people wish to look like you

𓆩♡𓆪 Moon in the 11H/Moon in Aquarius natives are gifted with incredible friends in this life. The meaning of these placements is to find friends you can relate with, very underrated placements ♡

𓆩♡𓆪 Lilith in the 4H and Cancer Lilith can be placements because you're not always surrounded with love or kindness, that's why is hard for you to give the same energy back

𓆩♡𓆪 Air Risings remind me of 90's songs. For some reason, I have always considered the 90s to be Air Risings era, related to music style kinda makes sense because

Libra Risings because Venus gives them the gift of arts and music, Libra because of their unique fashion (The 90's fashion in music industry was BOMB)

Gemini Risings because Mercury is heavy tied with music and with what we hear, Gemini because is tied with communication and learning skills in music

Aquarius Risings because of Uranus's help to bring uniqueness and difference in music styles, also to make it widely more known, Aquarius to make it comfortable for the community of music

Not me debating the reason 😭😭 i got too deep with this subject lol

𓆩♡𓆪 Let me tell ya guys ,it happens to have my Lilith [1181] conj my Aphrodite in the 5H (house of kids😭😭), these both make me to not want kids never, and I actually like it because i am a generational curse breaker anyway. Thanks to Lilith, i know Lady Aphrodite can act more "baby fever" in the 5H!!! Not my in case 💅💅💅

𓆩♡𓆪 Speaking of Lilith 1181 aspecting your Neptune can make you to act more dreamy & enchanted, also very intutive

𓆩♡𓆪 Lilith 1181 aspecting your Moon makes you to be vulnerable at times, need to take care and to protect your energy! Dont depend on others

𓆩♡𓆪 Lilith 1181 aspecting your Venus will make you to act more possessive your relationships/spouse, will make you to be more in love even obsessed at times.

♡■ New week, a new post for yall☆!! Enjoy it♡♡♡ ♡

I hope you all have a very beautiful Monday ♡♡♡

Harm♡♡nix

[writers-potion]

Let's Talk About Magic Systems.

There are two broad ways you can establish magic in your story world - work with existing concepts, or adapting it for something new.

Pick a System

High Magic vs. Low Magic

This distinction existes mostly in the western wrld from the Middle Ages onwards. In non-western cultures, this distinct often doesn't exist.

High magic requires magicians to study from books, ingredients are expensive and instruments elaborate and hard to get. The typical practioner of High Magic is of the upper class, highly educated, and rich. They serve in King's courts and have high social standing thanks to their knowledge.

Among the lower classes and women, Low Magic is ore common. It is taught orally and doesn't require reading skills and uses everyday objects and ingredients.

Black vs. White Magic

"White" magic is often associated with good, and "Black" with the evil. However, what really matters is the magicians intension, not the magic system that they work with.

The term "black magic" is often associated with working with the dead. It can also be used by an individual/group who just wants to appear more menacing.

Ceremonial Magic

This kind of magic involves lots of ritual, recitation and prayer, often in ancient langauges such as Latin, Aramaic and Sanskrit.

Most of the time, it's High Magic and practiced by religious figures.

The typical practioner is educated, has great confidence and a good memory.

Natural Magic

It involves ingredients from nature, such as herbs and water.

It may be practiced outdoor, in a kitchen, or in a laboratory.

The rituals are simple and short, and the practioner will watch out for the turning of seasons, phases of the moon, etc.

Religious Magic

This is a diety working through a magician. The magician prays and asks her god to work the miracle.

Most religions have their own form of magic, and the kind of miracles that the magicians can bring can be limited.

Wiccan Witchcraft and Voodoo are largely religious magic.

The typical practioner would be spiritual and devout, often suspicious of other religions.

Alchemy

Alchemy is both High and Low Magic, and it can incorporate religious, spiritual, philosophical and mythological elements.

In a modern setting, alchemy can also be portrayed as "science gone too far".

The typical practioner would be patient, methodious, educated and driven. The tools includes laboratory equipment, astronomical charts, writing materials, and an unsuspecting roommate(?) for testing.

Traditional Witchcraft

Traditional Witchcraft is a form of Low Magic. In early historic periods, the witch played an important role in village life, often old women who owned apothecaries and helped out other villagers.

The typical practioner would be female, uneducated, illiterate, practical, resourceful and poor. She will have a good memory and well-developed senses.

Tools used would be simple household implements - a cauldron, a broom, knife, etc. that can evade the Inquisitor's suspicions.

Wiccan Witchcraft

If you write contemporary fiction, this is the system your character is most likely to use. It's modern witchcraft, based on the religion of Wicca.

Wiccan witchcraft mostly developed in the second half of the twentieth centruy. It is a form of bothe Natural Magic and Religious Magic.

Based on nature worship and the polarity between male and female, the magician often begins a Wiccan ritual with an invocation to a God/Godess. The Lady (Godess) is depicted as having three aspects: Maiden, Mother and Brone. The Lord (God) may be depicted with horns.

The focus of Wiccan magic is often on healing, with an emphasis of ethical consequences of what is being performed.

It is often practiced outdoors, sometimes naked (which they call 'skyclad'). Wiccan witchcraft uses the phases of the moon to amplify its effects.

Wiccan like to gather in groups called 'covens' or to meet once a month or for major festivals. The coven leader may be called 'high piestess/priest'.

Typical tools include a chalice, a knife (called 'athame'), a wand, candles, herbs, crystals, and essential oils.

Necromancy

The magician summons a dead person, either ghost or spirit, sometimes bodily. The dead are enlisted to grant the magicians with favors or are questioned for information.

It may be related to Shamanism, as well as to some forms of psychic work such as channelling and Spiritualist seances.

The typical practitioner is psychally gisted, strong-willed and courageous.

Shamnism

Shamnism is a Low Magic system. The shaman intercedes between the human and spirit world by communicating with spirits, often to obtain information or provide healing.

Shamans may travel to the spirit world to seek answered, with some level of danger. They use drums, chanting, dancing and drugs to alter their consciousness and communicate with spirits.

Practicing shamans often work alone, but they choose a successor to train. The apprentice is supposed to accept the calling.

The typical shaman is musical, sensitive with a strong sense of rhythm and the psychic.

Tools include drums, bells, a costume, herbs, bones, smoke and mind-altering drugs.

Ancient Egyptian Magic

Ancient Eyptian Magic ovelaps with Religious magic, medicine and with psychic work. The deities most frequently evoked are Selket, Aset for raising the dead, and the gof Thoth for anything to do with sickness and healing.

The emphasis of Ancient Egyptian Magic is protection, often done throgugh an amulet or talisman. The circle or oval is the most important shape that has protective qualities.

The precise wording of a spell is important, as well as the colors that are involved. For magic to affect someone the magicians must know that person's true name.

The typical practitioner is male, literate, often a priest attached to a emple.

Folk Magic

This is a form of Low Magic practiced by amateurs.

This includes housekeepers who can keep the rats out, farmers who can ripen fruit before the height of the season, and scullions who can make water boil faster.

This people would only know a handful of spells, ans pass them in to memebers of their family.

Voodoo

Voodoo is religious magic and low magic.

The rituals are held in private, and may involve communication with spirits, especially the spirits of ancestors and saints.

Commonly used to cure aliments, confound enemies, and obtain desires.

Invent a System

Choosing the Right Words

If your character is clearly a witch, shaman, a necromancer, etc. with a specialty, use that term. Otherwise, the word "magician", or "mage" would be most appropriate.

The term "magus" (plural magi) refers to practitioners of the ancient Zoroastrian faith.

Strictly speaking, witches and wizards are practitioners of two very different magic systems, so your female character can be a wizard, and vice versa.

'Warlock' really means 'oath-breaker' or 'traitor' and doesn't describe a magician.

'Conjurer' is someone who can creae effects to impress an audience, not really magical in itself. The more modern temr would be 'illusionist'

A group of magicians may be called a 'coven' (though it applies mostly to Wiccan magic). A magician working alone would be a 'solitary'.

Magic vs. Magick

Normally, "magic" is the correct spelling.

However, "magick" may be used, especially by insiders, to emphasize that they refer to the real thing, not conjuring or other trick of the eye.

The magic systems are sometimes capitalized, sometimes not. When it involves a religion, nationaliy, or a particular family line, it is capitalized. Just make sure to keep it consistent throughout your book.

If you like my blog, buy me a coffee☕ and find me on instagram! 📸

[astrobydalia]

🍂Cozy observations 🎃

Itssss fall you guys!!!! 🥰🥰🥰🥰 It’s actually super hot still where I live but that won’t stop me from living my cozy era. Anyways, I want to avoid collecting posts on my drafts for centuries so here’s more general observations!

work by astrobydalia

🍂Aquarius placements are simultaneously the most understanding and empathetic people ever and the biggest assholes out there. I don't know how they pull that contradiction off but it's true (I mean this in the best way possible btw)

Moreover, I’ve noticed Aquarius placements are way more appreciative of kindness and social harmony than Libra tbh. Libra's desire for harmony can be just for the sake of keeping appearances but they are actually very judgmental. Aquarius on the other hand tend to appreciate authenticity and have a “live and let live” philosophy where they accept people unconditionally that’s why they attract popularity. Underdeveloped Aquarius tho do have a tendency to break social harmony due to pick-me behavior

🍂 Cardinal moons are serial daters. I swear every person I’ve met who had a rather active love life or were always crushing on someone was more often than on Cardinal moon

Also, Cardinal moons are always very dominant people even when don’t intend to be. They have a very summoning aura/personality that just demands engagement. They also tend to be social butterflies, even when they’re introverted they always end up surrounded by people somehow

🍂 I like to think Pisces is the final movie while Virgo is all the behind the scenes and editing

🍂I've seen this endless times where people with Mars in Libra or 7th house always end up either in law or business (mostly creating their own business, freelancers, entrepreneurs, etc)

🍂Any Venusian influence on the MC/10th house/6th house indicates a career or job where you’re required to dress up and appear very put together, having a certain aesthetic can be important in your career

🍂Saturn square or opposite MC/10th house ruler indicates the native was forced into a career they never chose/wanted in the first place or they had to wait a long time to finally have the opportunity to pursue their ideal career OR the path towards the career they chose could have been harder/more unfulfilling than they expected

🍂 I also like to think Taurus stops to smell the flowers and creates a flower bed for herself. Virgo studies the flowers and learns all about photosynthesis and shit. Capricorn creates a flower business and monopolizes the flower market

🍂 Those with Mars influence on their moon (Moon-Mars aspects, Aries/Scorpio moon) are really good at throwing shade but they’re unable to take it themselves. They don’t like to feel called out.

🍂 Mars in the 12th house people will 👏🏼hold 👏🏼 grudges 👏🏼

🍂 To be quite honest with you, every single Virgo sun I’ve met had a very standoffish personality.

🍂 Saturn retrograde individuals raised themselves. That’s why this placement is known to have issues with authority and discipline because their parents didn’t really parent them at all, so they had to set their own boundaries, rules and systems to navigate life. Getting their life together and materializing their ambitions could take extra effort for them

🍂 I usually like Capricorn Moons cause I always find that they are very loyal to everyone (friends, family, partner, etc) but honestly they are not as emotionally mature as you might think. They have a really hard time moving on from the past to the point where they can stay stuck in their wounded child self and spend a big chunk of their lives trying to overcompensate this with work, productivity and success. Tendency to depression, low emotional intelligence and being emotionally stunted. Deep down they feel like the victim of their own story

🍂 Aquarius sun+Scorpio moon: I’ve met quite a few people with this combo and with all of them I’ve noticed they always have a cult leader kinda mentality towards their friendships and connections (might apply to Aquarius+Scorpio combos in general). You’re either with them or against them. If you're not a follower they’ll hit you with the "cool kids table" attitude

🍂 My mom has Mercury in the 4th house and she once said "I don't mind moving abroad but I can't live in a place where people don't speak my native language. I need to hear my native language"

🍂 When it’s said that Venus in the 1st house people know how to make themselves look good it doesn’t mean just physically. The know how to present themselves as a more virtuous person than they actually are...

🍂Mutable risings, Mars in a mutable sign/house: their motto is “work smarter not harder”. Their first instinct will always be to find a way around challenges and difficulties. They usually aren’t the most action oriented people, but they are cunning. Their way to success is basically beating the system to make things easier for themselves.

🍂I can easily recognize Taurus Sun because they always ooze BDE. Also they always tend to have very rugged and bold physique/features

🍂From what I've seen Gemini Venus is a placement that easily makes someone stereotypically extroverted. Golden retriever energy

🍂Has anyone else noticed that succedent houses (aka fixed houses) are all related to money and wealth in some way?

2nd house: your resources, what spend your money on 5th house: gamble 8th house: shared resources, investments and debt 11th house: production of wealth

🍂All Gemini and Cancer risings I’ve met had some sort of hypersensitivity to stimuli. Gemini rising is more mental; anxiety, overthinking, information overload, etc they easily get triggered by immediate stimuli, specially noise around them. For Cancer risings this manifests more in the senses (photosensitivity, very sensitive to smells, flavors, etc) and heightened intuition just like Spiderman with spider-sense

🍂I’m sorry but why are Cancer Mercuries so elusive in their communication??? Everything they say has this "well, maybe. I don't know" or "I guess" undertone to it, they never openly say what they really mean. They are good listeners tho

🍂Underdeveloped Taurus placements feel entitled to use and dispose of people to benefit themselves. Tend to be very selfish and stingy. They do something for you they'll hang it over your head forever and act like they have ownership over you. You do something for them, they owe you nothing.

🍂Pisces Moons grew up in their own little bubble. It's very likely they missed out on 'normal' mundane experiences and this makes them feel very separated from the rest of the world and the rest of the people which is why they often come off as clueless and disconnected. They often give off the impression they've been living under a rock or a parallel universe. A perfect example of this is when Kim Kardashian said she's never been to a grocery store💀

Every single Pisces moon I’ve met never ever wanted to have kids and if they do have them they tend to not be too present in their kids’ lives. The harsh truth is pisces moons are not reliable, generally they are the ones who want to be saved and cared for

🍂I've noticed earth Venus and Venus-Saturn aspects are a little bit too good at showing contempt. To some degree they always remind me of Disgust from the Inside Out movie 😂

🍂 When I see Moon-Saturn conjunction in a chart I flinch a little tbh cause idk what’s worse the fact that their mothers couldn’t be bothered to give the native any sort of emotional comfort or the fact that these natives have normalized conditional love as the only kind of love possible. I've also noticed they grew up with strong authoritarian values and were never allowed to question hierarchies or status

Also, natives with Moon-Saturn conjunction are extremely shady people if you ask me. It's true they are insanely observant but what people don't seem to notice is that they are observant in a Joe Goldberg or Light Yagami kind of way without the murder They do be having inner monologues like that. They come across as calm, intelligent, respectful and trusted. Can use emotional expression (theirs and others') in strategic ways to influence others. Big tendency towards materialistic, utilitarian and/or elitist mindset too. I can't quite put my finger on it but I've met a lot of people with this aspect and the deeper I dig the more I keep feeling something very dark and/or disingenuous about them

🍂Venus square Neptune people and their lack of self-respect… 🙁

🍂Aquarius Moons always give off the impression of having a rather lazy or passive personality. I'm not talking about their productivity but the fact that they seem to always have a "meh" attitude towards everything to the point where they can feel a bit disconnected similar to pisces moon

🍂Virgo risings often have freelance jobs due to Aquarius ruling their 6th house

🍂People with Industria rx (389) may actually dislike their work environment even if they like their job. I’ve noticed they often find the industry they work in to be toxic, depleting or too demanding

🍂Enterprise rx (9777) might always feel unsatisfied with their position, they might be the type to always want more and more

🍂 Aries Moon women and always attracting very immature and selfish men omg I've seen this time and time again

🍂 Scorpio moon/Moon 8th house is an underrated wealth indicator imo. I've noticed they always have a "from rags to riches" kinda life story. They however often face issues with fraud or debt along the way cause they have a tendency to take huge financial risks

🍂 you ever heard about the crabs in a bucket phenomenon? Well Ive actually observed underdeveloped 4th house placements do tend to have this kind of clingy and envious behavior particularly towards people that are really close to them. You can also experience this with people you have 4th house Synastry with; you get too attached to the comfort zone they provide to the point where they stifle your growth

🍂Pisces placements 🤝 falling for people who are bluntly abusive, controlling and narcissistic. They want to believe they’re living a beauty and the beast love story when in reality they’re trauma bonding

🍂Libra/Taurus Mars people ARE problematic and petty as fuck, they’re just good at the social game and making it look like they didn't do anything. Underdeveloped Venus energy is the opposite of peaceful, it gives major mean girl vibes and Mars being debilitated in these signs easily brings out this hostile side of Venus. The type to passively instigate drama just to make themselves look better. Very hypocritical

🍂What natives with Saturn in Taurus will consider first when choosing a career is make sure that it is well payed and gives them financial status. Other factors come second

🍂Fixed+cardinal combo in the luminaries is hands down the best sun-moon combo I've seen tbh (specially fixed sun+cardinal moon), they're a force to be reckoned with. Very charismatic, outspoken and confident people with healthy ego if developed. Most people I've met with this combo were very extroverted and/or excellent leaders

🍂Sagittarius placements 🤝 this pose 😜✌🏼

🍂Libra/7th house Lilith have a tendency to judge a book by its cover all the time

🍂I've noticed Pisces MC/10th house natives aren't very ambitious. They seem to not really care about things like self-development or being on top. From what I've seen they mostly aspire to have a pleasant and glamurous life that frees them form real life mundane worries and could desire to retire as early as possible. In some cases I've seen they could want a "princess" kinda lifestyle where they literally have no responsibilities. They want a career that liberates them from any pressure of achieving material expectations and allows them to just go brain dead all the time following a higher power/inspiration/knowledge. That's why many artists have this placements and I've also seen cases of Pisces MC people who wanted to be nuns and nurses. I've noticed that when they genuinely don't care about recieving recognition or achievements but rather do things bc it aligns with their soul that's when they become successful

🍂Scorpio placements have a tendency to be very cynical I've noticed, specially mercury and mars

🍂Gemini/3rd house Lilith can spot lies from miles away and will not be sacred to call it out

🍂As per my observation the water sign that gets idolized the most is not Pisces but Cancer 100%. Yes Pisces does get idolized but I’ve noticed that’s actually very short-lived, people tend to switch up on them SO fast cause they project a deeply unrealistic image on them and eventually fall off the pedestal. Cancer placements on the other hand are not infantized like Pisces, they are consistently very sought after people I’ve observed. They always come across as emotionally reliable even when they’re not, people always go soft for them while simultaneously respecting them so they’re always seen as perfect,kind,charming,etc. Their personality naturally portrays an energy of unconditional love and understanding so people easily get obsessed and addicted to them

🍂I always find that Pisces Venus natives have a very whimsical and juvenile personality. They also have a very extravagant taste they may like anything with bright colors, glittery shiny stuff, squishy toys, etc. they have a tendency to be a bit tacky and corny I’ve noticed

🍂Every fixed moon I've seen avoided any sort of emotional rehabilitation like the plague unless it’s strictly necessary. They believe no one can begin to understand them better than themselves and they got it all figured out already. Now this is more my opinion but I feel like they low-key underestimate the amount of healing they actually need to do cause they really struggle taking emotional accountability. They have a tendency to act like their needs and feelings justify everything so there's not much to "fix" or heal

🍂People who have at least 2 out of their big 3 in cardinal signs are often seen as the golden girl/boy

🍂Capricorn/Virgo moons will be literally the best at what they do and make it seem so effortless. If you ask them how they got so successful they'll be like "idk I guess I just practiced a lot"

🍂I’ve noticed your 8th house sign(s) represent themes that people are consistently using against you as the fastest way to tear you down, so you always end up feeling powerless here at some point. That’s why you tend to resent this energy and have toxic dynamics with people who have their planets here. This house is literally the death of you (8th from 1st), but it can also be the source of your empowerment once you claim this energy so it's best that you keep this house to yourself as much as possible. Some examples:

Gemini 8th house: using what you say against you. you could have a hard time with people believing your words, what you say is always scandalous and/or rubs people the wrong way. Gossip or information that makes you look bad. People always think you’re lying or deceiving or have ulterior motives Cancer 8th house: you could struggle with getting sympathy and emotional support from people. Others think you’re just being vulnerable and complaining for clout. Any display of emotion or care will be seen as manipulative. People trying to break or ruin your relationship with your family or closed ones Capricorn 8th house: you struggle with people respecting you, others don't take you seriously and don't see you as a valid authority. Any attempt to make yourself respected will be seen as dictatorial or elitist behavior, any desire to succeed will be seen as you being power hungry. People try to dismiss or belittle your achievements

work by astrobydalia

[kathaynesart]

Bit of a random question, but as a teen I'm curious, what would you want to say to kids of today? Any advice?

Hm... every person's life journey is different, but I don't mind giving a few tips based on my personal experiences! If they can help in anyway then I am glad for it!

Ted Talk below the cut.

Life will always change. YOU will change. You may feel stuck or trapped in some aspect of your life right now and are worried that things will never get better. But they do... it will take time, but you will get there so long as you keep moving forward.

Try not to stress too much. All those things that seem like such a big deal right now... most of them will be forgotten within a few years. So it helps when you feel overwhelmed to step back and not let these little (or even big) missteps take control of your life.

No really, go touch grass. I can not express how important it is to disconnect from social media and just be present in the moment. Going out to a cafe or a park to help you unwind and ground yourself. If life allows, try traveling! Even if it's just a road trip. Get out and see and experience different things because those will be the memories that will stick with you!

Change things up. Even if that's just taking a different path to school or trying a different snack. I find that stepping away from the mundane daily schedule helps bring so much more variety to my life and helps me be more present in the moment.

Be flexible. Especially in your goals and expectations. We're expected at such a young age to choose our destination in life, when it's the journey itself that we should be seeking. So while it's great to have goals, do not make them so rigid that you will deem yourself a failure should they not come to pass. Often times it's the things that surprise us in life that help lead us to opportunities we had never even considered.

Your worth does not come from what you produce, or how many milestones you hit, or how much money you make. It is something you give yourself as you relearn time and time again to love yourself.

Your health is important! It is something we often take for granted when we’re younger but it will mean so much as you age. Also should you feel that you’re ever in pain or unwell, speak up. There are so many instances of people coming to greater harm because they only listened to the first doctor who brushed them off. Seek a second opinion. Know that your body is worth proper care!

Just because you have to grow old does not mean you have to "grow up." Those things you loved that sparked joy in you as a kid? Hold onto them or find new ways to instill them into your life. Keep that passion and remember what fun is! Because you will need it just as much when you're older. It is a major ingredient in the spice of life.

Remember, you ARE special. You may not feel like it... but the fact that you exist is such a mind boggling feat in this vast universe of mostly empty space. While that may be difficult to grasp as we are, stuffed in this tiny jewelry box we call Earth, that does not make any one of us any less special in the grand scheme of things. And in this tiny but overflowing box of treasures, there is no gem that is quite like you. You managed against all odds to come into existence. That is AMAZING. Congratulations! Hard part is already done. Now go shine!

[daydreamcloudshiding]

#1 Astrology Observations

If you have Sun, Moon, Venus, Lilith, or Pluto with Chiron in synastry, you both can either really heal each other without even trying (like one person might say the right things at the right time, they have the same life principles or values, they truly understand each other's pain that other people are unable to) or, both parties will trigger each other so much that one person might hate the other person intensely. These triggers are supposed to open opportunities for healing, but if one or both are not ready or too immature, there'll be so much pain and chaos in the relationship.

In my experiences, if you have Sun-North Node synastry, the Sun person can really be the North Node biggest lesson in life. Now this doesn't mean that it's gonna be bad or hurtful, but the Sun person truly embody the characteristics and skills that North Node person really needs to reach stability in their life.

People with heavy air signs in their chart are very individualistic. Like they care, but they don't. The way the share their caring side to you is usually through facts and knowledge. If you have synastry with someone, mostly in air houses or someone with heavy air signs, the way you both bond with each other is usually very cerebral. There needs to be mental connection. Communication is very important to them. They won't bother with trying to read between the lines.

If you have Moon or Venus square Pluto synastry with someone, the Moon will become so emotionally and mentally attached to Pluto person. The Moon will feel the most secure when they are with the Pluto person, but also can sense that there's this danger with Pluto but they can't put their finger on it. The Pluto person will be attracted to this dynamic because it gives them a sense of power, but at the same time this will trigger their biggest fear (it could be betrayals, abandonment, etc) from the Moon or Venus person because, just as much as the Moon or Venus person is attached, the Pluto is attached too. The Moon is soft in their approach, while Pluto is not. This is a little bit like if the Moon is suspicious that Pluto is cheating, and just being quiet about it while they try to find out the truth. While Pluto might demand the Moon to give their phone's password, their social media, etc. The Moon can become elusive, the Pluto can become controlling.

My biggest turn off is Mercury square Mercury in synastry. Truly, in this synastry, both seems to never be able to truly understand each other. In my experience, any form of emotional attachment feels forced. Like one could care about the other person, but at the same time, they always will feel so offended by what the other person said. It feels forced as if both are such two different pieces of puzzle. It's like one person see the other person as aliens. I think people tend to underestimate this aspect in synastry, probably because Mercury isn't exactly a "love" planet. With square Venus, it is merely love languages. But with Mercury, the other person usually don't have the capacity to see or comprehend the other person's worldview, or experiences. One person might stay away from the other as to not argue with them, and the other will see this as abandonment. If one person opens their mouth about anything, they will be dismissed as ignorant. This aspect is very tricky and hard in synastry. Both will just argue a lot.

If you have any Saturn conjunction synastry with someone, somehow the energy of the relationship feels stifling, but it's not the point of it. It feels stifling because Saturn is about self-control and order. I adore this synastry with someone that you are in romantic relationship with, because it's also about devotion and faithfulness. The stifling part can be that you both become so careful of not saying the wrong thing because you can sense how delicate the other person's feelings is, and there's a huge sense of responsibility here, almost as if the other person's feelings or well being is your responsibility too, and vice versa. Saturn conjunct Sun/Moon make the Saturn person feels responsible to the Sun/Moon person, while the Sun/Moon person somehow perceive the Saturn person as someone who is highly respected and experienced.

If you have very little to no aspects (especially conjunction) with someone in synastry (especially in personal planet), it makes it very hard for the both of you to relate to each other's feelings. Even if both of you are generally nice people and treat the other good, it feels like they can't truly understand you, nor you understand them.

People with Saturn and Pluto dominant people usually have a lot of karma. Now this doesn't always means that it's bad, but really be careful of what you do as it will come back to you 10 times more. Saturn and Pluto deals with power and control, but actually mostly it's about self-control and self-empowerment. It's not so much about controlling other people or try to overpower others. If you have Pluto/Saturn aspects with someone and you are the Saturn/Pluto person, try to think about this. It's never about controlling other people or your partner.

People with Uranus in 7th unconsciously trying to find/attract partners who are unstable, be it mentally or financially, etc. It's really awful though because their relationship might effected them mentally so much to the point where they might spiral into depression. If you have this in your natal chart, please pay attention to the reasons as to why you are attracted to your person. I'm not saying that we should not date someone based on their mental health/financial status. But if you know that this person will likely mess with your head or life, please think about this thoroughly. What i noticed is, Uranus in 7th house people really desire to have a beautiful and stable romantic life but unconsciously attracted to people who won't give them exactly that.

If you have Venus in earth houses (2,6,10) people will generally see you as the stable one in relationships, even if you're not, even if you're awkward or inexperienced. It's generally because people see you as someone who's practical in relationships and most likely attract partners who are reliable too.

If you have 11th house synastry with someone and you attracted to them romantically, you guys might started off with friendship first. Or, there is this element of friendship in this relationship. Both of you don't always act romantic but somehow you guys get each other so easily. Like you guys might finish each other's sentences.

Mars in 4th house synastry means when the Mars person gets angry, it'll somehow feel familiar to the 4th house person or vice versa. Like when this person gets angry, it reminds you of when your own parents gets angry and how they act when they are angry. If you are close with your parents, it might means that you can handle their anger easily because you just know that to do.

When you have 8th house in composite or synastry, you will not ever doubt their feelings for you. For example, if you have moon in 8th house, you know damn well that this person loves you and so are they, they know that you love them so much.

If you find yourself so attracted to certain sign so much, check the degree of your Venus sign. For example, if you have Venus in 1 degree, you might find yourself so attracted to Aries.

If you have a lot of 2nd and 8th house conjunction with someone, it can mean that they will spoil you so much and vice versa. It's like an instinct, like they will naturally want to buy you things and so are you.

People always talk about how the sign in your 7th house is your romantic partner, but the 7th house also represent hidden enemies. For example, I have Cancer in my 7th house (Capricorn Rising), and i swear to whatever people finds holy, I cannot stand them no matter how nice i am to them, they are always so suspicious of me and start to talk sh*t behind my back. The only Cancer placement that i can get along with are Cancer Mars and Cancer Rising.

[astroismypassion]

Astrology observations 🔭🔭🔭

Credit goes to @astroismypassion

🔭 Scorpio Risings are so underated for their fashion. They really express creatively through their clothing choice. All of them need to be the flyest looking person in the room. They have really person, unique, daring and bold fashion sense, very personal much like Aries Moons.

🔭 But with that being said, they also either look like they haven’t showered for two days or really put together. They are constantly somewhere in the middle of being very comfortably dressed and really looking sharp. One day they can look homeless, but the next day like they are going to a fashion show. Again, they taking way of clothing in extreme.

🔭 The thing with Leo over the 8th house people I noticed is that they become much more carefree, spontaneous, worry less and less strict with time. When younger they put so much pressure of themselves, which could even make them a mood killer, because of how serious and strict they appear. But when older, they become much more easy-going and more flexible and not so strict with being punctual.

🔭 Composite Pisces Mars (even sometimes also Mars in the 12th house and Mars Neptune aspect) is often found where people have very different habits and lifestyle. One is a couch potato and the other is really active. One is really social and the other is introverted. Usually these two don't have compatible Mars signs in their own natal charts.

🔭 Composite Aries Moon is often found in the Composite chart where there is "a first". Maybe your first real partnership, the first person you have sex with, your first person you move in with, first crush, first love.

🔭 Couples who have Uranus in the 1st house in the Composite chart often don’t believe in traditional, stereotypical gender roles. They might both be the little spoon, they can both gift each other flowers and they might split the bill or each pay half of the joint bill.

🔭 Mars in Scorpio and Mars in Aries might have a partner that doesn’t that physical hygiene really seriously. They might often forget to brush teeth etc.

🔭 The sign that falls over the 11th house, you will feel they are very different from you. For example: if you have Libra over the 11th house, you could feel like you don’t resonate with Libra Sun when it comes to the traits of the sign. You might WISH, DREAM to have some of these traits one day in the future, but it is far from who you already are.

🔭 Virgo Moons can get quite paranoid if they don’t know the next step that they will take. At every step of the way they need to be sure to make a plan for the future, otherwise they spiral or panic.

🔭 I found people who have Capricorn over the 11th house might enter serious commitment later in life, well after the age of 30. They could start family, a job or a marriage later than average. But mostly, because they don’t want to rush these important parts of their life.

🔭 Composite Pisces Mars: you might quickly steal sneaky pictures of each other at random moments, like when the other is eating etc.

🔭 Whenever a Scorpio or a Aries Sun enters your life, you will just want to move and change along with them, because of how much action they bring in your life. With Cancer Sun entering your life, you might just see yourself spending more time with your family members, start cooking, decorating your home more, spending more time at home. When Taurus Sun enters your life, you might start valuing yourself more highly, you could start wearing better clothes and look more presentable. You might find yourself spending more time in nature.

🔭 Aries over the 4th house gets attached very fast in love when younger, but with time and age, they grow more comfortable with just being by themselves and don’t seek partnerships as much.

🔭 The first romantic partner that you will be the longest with (like your first really long relationship in comparison with previous ones), you might have Aquarius or Capricorn Ascendant in the Composite chart. Or Uranus or Saturn in the 1st house.

🔭 Leo Mars: best way towards more confidence, it’s just starting to work out more. They instantly get more confident. Because it’s Mars combined with Leo energy.

🔭 I noticed the best time to get a haircut is when Moon is transiting your 1st house. Because it’s a transit of naturally being comfortable with whatever new change it brings. You will still feel secure within yourself.

🔭 Virgo MC supposedly is one of the most “workaholic” placements, but can we talk about Gemini over the 4th house or Gemini ICs? They literally need work to feel secure and comfortable in themselves.

Credit goes to @astroismypassion

[inphront]

thinking tonight about griddlehark as doomed by not seeing power and control as linked/trying to have one without the other.

harrow is desperate for control over every aspect of her situation, breaking down the moment anything happens that she can't predict or change or have agency in, but she's consumed by guilt and horror at the idea of being in power. she takes so much pride in necromancy as an element of her world and life where she is capable and a genius and in control, and it's a massive source of internal contention because one of the biggest gears turning her character is the cost of that control, and the fact that necromancy is inherently caught up in power dynamics. ianthe notices this about her in the epiparados: she's used to having her hands on the reins, can't cope when they're taken off, and doesn't have the personality to put them back on. harrow wants to run the ninth for the sake of having control over it, but situations like her birth where she has clear power over it make her want to die. she wants control over gideon, but is horrified by the power differential involved within necro/cav relationships. harrowhark deals horribly with uncertainty. she doesn't want power, just certainty, and therefore control. much of her arc involves the recognition that it is impossible to control an equal, which is her fundamentally impossible want: to be gideon's equal without giving her the right to leave, to be necromantically capable without the leveraging of power over her house that this requires, and the ability to align the world with what is just without the social position or the force so often involved in making meaningful change.

meanwhile, gideon has never felt important to anyone. her most fundamental desire is to be important to someone, and this manifests in her military fantasies and rebellion against authority as a desire for power. she wants the status and the catharsis of being at the top of a podium she's spent her life crushed underneath. but she doesn't put much thought into actually using any of this power she wants so badly. gideon doesn't want power for the sake of agency, but for the sake of admiration, which is how she ends up as a figurehead-- someone theoretically in a position of total power, with no control over even her own body. even her self-actualization as a cavalier was, to some extent, an acceptance of a title and a position within the empire under the understanding that she would be used. expressions of power, such as killing crux, don't feel good to her, but the concept of power itself, of having important parents and prestige and a big sword and recognition, do.

and how can they explain this to each other? they're both trying to take opposite halves of a mutually inclusive set. it's no wonder, then, that the tragedies of their relationship are desperate attempts to give each other things they don't want: gideon's death makes harrow far more powerful under terms harrow can't control. harrow then attemps to control those terms, and by extension to give gideon back her life and her agency, which gideon interprets as revoking the power she had over harrow's emotions and memory (as well as her imperial title, which may not indicate much power but sure does mean more than "indentured servant to the ninth"). for much of gtn, harrow had both power and control, while gideon had neither, and i expect this to switch when they interact in atn because it is impossible to only have one. in this way, their relationship raises a lot of questions about power structures as a whole: what do you do when changing the world requires you to leverage power against other people? what do you do when positive recognition inherently comes with a responsibility to be cruel? when relinquishing your capacity to hurt people limits your capacity to help, and when getting out from under the boot means putting it on? how do interactions with power and control interpersonally reflect systemic influence?

idk mostly i just shake them

[neptunes-sol-angel]

Just a reminder that everyone has both a masculine and a feminine side, so don't hesitate to read the feminine version of this pick a card too.

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Pile One 👢

BEYONCÉ- RIIVERDANCE

Someone could be feeling really entitled to your energy. They could be asking a lot from you, where one demand is contradictory to the other demand, which can be very draining for you. Then on top of that, they could be trying to tell you to change certain aspects of your personality that interfere with their gall to have excessive control over you. They could be naturally intimidated by you and use microaggressive verbiage to get you to submit to them. Like if they’re being passive aggressive with you, your tendency to be direct, would make them label you as aggressive. Or if you’re not even the type to use your voice a lot because of anxiety, they could ask you to communicate instead of being avoidant, and then when you do speak up it’s still a problem. Your masculine side is trying to get you to see that this double-edged sword is not an excuse to continue letting others walk all over you and stagnate your life and comfort. You’re in a situation where boundaries simply aren’t enough for this relationship to be balanced, it’s time to cut ties. You must take that control over your own life back and stop placing so much value on what other people say that they want you to do because the thing about people pleasing, is that whether you’re doing it or trying to recover from it, people will never be satisfied or happy with what you do and how you do it. You're always going to piss someone off or be labeled in some way as “not doing enough” of something, and that’s the other message, which is to learn what’s in your control and what’s not for you to control. If you’re dealing with someone who’s exhausting you that you aren’t biologically responsible for, I’m hearing “do it. It’s ok to do it”. Deprive that person of the resources that you’ve given them to remind them of what they really didn’t deserve in the first place, not as a punishment, but as a way to remind yourself that you are the source of your own power and to stop keeping people around who are pulling you down because they convinced you that you need them.

Pile Two 👢

BEYONCÉ- AMEN

Give your body a break. Give away this idea that you need to be fighting all of the time to get what you want and need or that you have to sacrifice yourself to provide for others. That message is mostly for those in my collective who are the eldest child and have to bear the brunt of responsibility. Something needs to be done differently, but it all starts with putting your foot down. Call out what’s being done that’s unfair to you. If there's a double standard with your gender, say that, because you’re not crazy. It’s not the coconut oil to all of your problems but changing your mindset does allow for some shifts and changes to your situation to happen. Acknowledge that you’d rather invest your hard work into something else, like getting your own place or making moves towards something that harmonizes with your ambition, because no matter how difficult it may be to accomplish those goals, keeping your focus on that target is what will help make getting to that goal or goals a lot faster without you feeling a loss of motivation on the way. For others in this pile, you need to allow others to help you. When you’re going through a mental crisis or an addiction, it is heavily underestimated how healing socializing can be. You don’t need to be ashamed or feel less than because you need assistance, having a community is so important because there can be times where your own mind can be your enemy and the way to combat it, is having a friend or in general someone, who cares, to help pull you out of that. Imposter syndrome and intrusive thoughts could be something that’s being struggled with and just know that you are worthy and able to get help with it, but remember, even on your worst days, that you are enough and you can do whatever your mind is trying to create doubt around.

Pile Three 👢

BEYONCÉ - LEVII'S JEAN

If you feel like your love life is nonexistent because it has to do with the way that you look, the answer is both yes and no. You think it’s because people don’t find you attractive, but people find you to be extremely hot, but you know what’s also hot? Your aura, and people don’t want to be burned whether they deserve it or not. Even if you don’t have big expectations in love, you look like you do, or you’re not aware of how you sound when you talk about the things that you like or want. I even have this feeling that if the majority of people who secretly admire you approached you, you would not be impressed with them and that’s ok. Your standards and expectations, even if you don’t think that they are high, are what protect you. Don’t let your curiosity of stepping outside of what you want, be your temptation for something that you could potentially regret. One day you will find that love that you’re looking for and some of you have actually already found it, but you’re not seeing yourself as someone they could have feelings for. You need to start seeing yourself in a better light and having more confidence over your divinely given features, both physical and internal, because it’s so easy to miss out on opportunities in love and your career because you don’t see how gifted you are.

[cripplecharacters]

How should you write/draw burn survivors? I know this isn't a drawing blog but I don't know of one that I could ask this question to.

Hello!

I'm not a burn survivor myself, so I'll mostly talk about facial differences/visible disability in general and link some stuff made by burn survivors.

First thing, I think it's important to remember that being a burn survivor changes a lot of things - not only appearance. Very important part is the psychological one, but I'm not a burn survivor so I will just let the resources linked below speak.

From the physical aspect, burns can also come with: chronic pain, limited range of motion due to scarring, tightened skin, problems with regulating temperature, itching, skin irritation, and even different nutritional needs during the initial healing process.

There is also specific everyday care associated with burns - something you basically never see in fiction. That could be things like occupational therapy, physical therapy, skincare (like heavy moisturizing and scar massaging), wearing sunblock, wearing splints, or stretching to prevent contractures or tightness.

There are also different types of burns and they (unsurprisingly) differ from each other - for example, electrical burns have a much higher rate of amputation than any other type. Chemical burns can cause eye issues. A burn caused by a fire in a closed space might result in a brain injury due to the lack of oxygen. A much larger portion of people than you (probably) assume have survived burn injuries as small children, and if they were young enough they might not even remember the event at all, unlike older people who might be very affected by the trauma.

Experiences of a person with 80% body surface burns, a person with quadruple amputations from an electrical burn, a person with a facial burn, and a person burnt very recently will be different from someone who has a 5% body surface 2nd degree burn in a spot that’s usually hidden, who has lived with their burn for a decade - despite them all being burn survivors.

When it comes to more thorough research, I recommend going through Phoenix Society’s and Face Equality International’s websites to learn more about both real burn survivor’s perspectives, and face equality as a social justice topic. I think the 3rd link (see below) puts it very well when talking about burn survivors being represented in fiction:

“Most likely, these characters were not created by someone with lived experience. The result is an increasingly garbled game of telephone [...] To avoid contributing to this false narrative, embrace research as part of the process. Explore interviews, first-person accounts, and articles from reliable sources.”

I personally think that the links below should be mandatory reading for writing not only burn survivors, not only people with facial differences, but visibly disabled people in general - because the treatment we get is often so similar the advice still holds up just fine. And if you don't plan on writing any of these, you should still read them to see how prevalent of a problem ableism in media is.

Lise Deguire's Hey Hollywood - scars don't make you evil.

Face Equality International's International Media Standard on Disfigurement.

Niki Averton's Tips for Writing about Burn Survivors.

The main sentiment that you will read from basically any first-hand source is that if you're writing the burn survivor to be either:

evil (just throw the whole character away. please.)

a guy with the "World's Saddest Most Tragic Backstory Ever and It's So Sad and Tragic" (because he revealed he has a scar.)

a helpless victim who is there to be The Helpless Victim

...then you're already doing it wrong and need to make some major changes.

From our blog's reblogs and posts, you might want to look at tips for writing a visibly different/disabled character and tips on drawing people with facial differences. Neither are specific to burn survivors but cover the topic of visible disability and facial differences.

Now for tips on drawing burn survivors (that weren't included in the last link);

Reference real people. 99.9% drawings of burn survivors seem to go through the same "increasingly garbled game of telephone" that Niki Averton mentions with how burn survivors are written, in that the newer the drawing, the less in common it has with how real people with burns look like because people reference from each other and none of them ever think to actually check if their depiction is accurate. If you just google "burn survivor" you will very quickly notice that burn survivors don't have that damn red overlay layer put on top of their skin. It just doesn't look like that, and basic research (aka Google Images search) will tell you that - and still, people color a hand with bright red and think that's how it looks like (it doesn't).

In the same vein, maybe don't just draw an able-bodied person and then put some scarring on top (or maybe do exactly that. No burn scar and no burn survivor is the same, and there are people that fit what I just described... but hear me out for a second). Think about how scars interact with their features - do they have both of their ears? Do they still have all of their hair? Do they only have parts of their eyebrow? Do they have all of their fingers? Can they move the same as before their burn, or are their scars limiting their joints? How did their body react to the post-burn hypermetabolism? Lots to think about. Take into account what type and thickness of burns your character has.

Ditch the mask trope. Just ditch it. There's no need to cover your character's scar from the world unless you as the author think it requires to be hidden, is too scary to show, or other ableist trope that seems to always come up with drawings of visibly disabled people, especially burn survivors. The one exception I will mention is a transparent face orthosis/mask (TFO) that facial burn survivors might wear while awaiting a skin graft early after their injury. But as the name suggests, it's transparent and doesn't work for the awful "ohh scary facial difference better cover it up and only reveal it in some hyper dramatic scene!!" trope because you can see right through it. (I will also mention that TFOs are a very modern thing. Your medieval burn survivor wouldn't be wearing one.)

No "body horror", no "gore" tags or trigger warnings or whatever. That's a human being. If you feel the need to warn your followers before they see a disabled person existing, you're better off not drawing them.

Some last notes;

Throughout this ask I used the term "burn survivor" rather than "burn victim" because that is, to my knowledge, the general community preferred phrase. Individual opinions will differ (because no group is a monolith) but "burn survivor" is generally the safest term to use and probably the best if talking about a fictional character.

Similarly, I used "facial difference" rather than "disfigurement". Just as the above, opinions will differ on what is the best to use but I personally, as someone with facial asymmetry and a cranial nerve disorder, heavily prefer the term "facial difference" over "disfigurement". (I am in this case The Individual Opinion Differing because you can notice that in the links above, facial difference and disfigurement are used interchangeably. The general community uses both, some people have specific preferences. I'm some people.) When talking about a fictional character, "facial difference", "visible difference" and "disfigurement" are all probably fine. Just stay away from calling a person "deformed".

mod Sasza

[callmeagardengnome]

𓆩 bless me 𓆪 - chapter 1

w.c - 2.2k

pairings - demon!ateez ot8 x receptionist! fem! reader

genre - demon au, hint of royal au, possible yandere themes (?), romance, slow burn

sypnosis: as hell’s receptionist, you only wished to talk shit and stay out of trouble. yet, you happened to be the one that the two social clans in hell start fighting for.

not proofread!

previous / next

masterlist

Click clack. Click clack. You’ve gotten used to the sounds of keyboard typing. Why wouldn’t you be after hearing it everyday for almost 4 centuries?

As Hell’s receptionist, your job was to check in arrivals daily. A new soul arrives, another contract is signed and they are officially Hell’s inhabitant forever. It’s a pretty simple task, one that you’ve learned to appreciate. Unfortunately for you, the job comes with another responsibility.

You have the ‘lovely’ privilege of listening and attending to complaints. From the wails of the Dead to the petty protests of demons, your days are filled with discontent and irritancy.

As thrilling as it sounds, you find yourself being bored most of the time. Nothing exciting ever happens. You hear the same complaints everyday - all yap yap yap. You could not care less about soothing the Dead or settling another demon squabble.

Today felt no different, the neon red sign flickered above your desk, signalling that someone was entering your office space. You straightened your posture and adjusted your nameplate that read, “Receptionist of the Damned.”

Your eyes scanned over to your visitor and you immediately recoiled in disgust, “Ugh.. please leave the air that I’m breathing.”

“Come on.. haven’t I seen you enough times that we’re basically best friends?” the demon in front of you asked as he batted his eyelashes.

Wooyoung, the most annoying demon you’ve ever met, leaned over your desk with his signature smirk plastered on his face.

“Sir, you look like my sleep paralysis demon. Please leave my office,” you said sternly as you signalled to the door.

“My dear receptionist, you wound me..” he pouted dramatically, not taking your words seriously at all. “At least listen to what I have to say...”

You sighed. “It’s another complaint about the Eternals isn’t it-“

“You know it is,” Wooyoung sneered, his voice dripping with disdain, contrasting his playful personality earlier.

To put it simply, Hell has three social factions:

The highest faction - The Eternals. They are royalty, demons that need to be treated with the utmost respect. They’re the richest demons that you would find in Hell. Eternals have purple horns, ones that reached high above their heads, almost touching each other. While their horns could be used to distinguish them, their snobbish and stuck-up personality was more than enough.

The lowest faction - The Halas. If you were born a Hala, you’ve lost all hope of having a calm life. A Hala would have stubby red horns and sharp fangs. Despite making up 97% of the demon population, a Hala gets the worst treatment out of the three social factions - mainly due to their aggressive personalities. Most of them are poor and extremely money-hungry. Since they are greedy, they don’t normally make friends with each other. In fact, a Halas’ death mostly happens due to their own kind.

Last but not least, your own faction - The Walkers. The Walkers are typically neutral in everything. Money, social treatment, et cetera. Walkers have jet black horns, almost like the colour of soot. The Walkers are the rarest social class. They are in every government-related job as they are considered ‘impartial’. Having a connection with a Walker is vital for your social class to be stronger.

Money, surprisingly, was an important aspect in Hell. It allowed you to buy a house, have a family or spend it on gambling. It was sought for by so many that it had led to many riots in the past.

Wooyoung was a Hala, with a burning hatred for Eternals. His resentment towards them grew every time he visited, a fire that never seemed to burn out. “They think they can own everything,” he continued, his voice laced with anger. “They walk all over our territory with their big ass boots and claim it as theirs.”

You nodded, taking mental notes. It was a familiar complaint, yet there was more rage since his previous visit. “I’ll file your case, Wooyoung. But you know the process- it’ll take at least two weeks.”

Wooyoung scoffed, crossing his arms. “We don’t have time. You don’t understand- the Halas are planning a revolt.”

A revolt? His words caught you off guard and for the first time in a while, you felt surprised. Having a revolt is startling enough - but Halas revolting? It was unheard of to have them working together for a cause. You quickly shook off the feelings of shock and composed yourself.

“That’s a very bold claim.. but I’m confused of why you’re so worried. I thought you liked chaos?” you asked, raising an eyebrow.

Wooyoung’s expression darkened, the usual glint in his eyes disappearing. “Chaos? Yes. But this? This is destruction, ‘____’. The Eternals will soon crush us and tear Hell apart. That includes you.”

You leaned back into your chair, the weight of his words dawning on you at full force. A revolt of this scale would disrupt all of the progress that has been built over the centuries.

You sighed as you ran your fingers through your hair. “If I file this case under ‘urgent’, its going to attract a lot of attention. The kind that gets me in a lot of trouble.”

Wooyoung leaned closer to you, grabbing your jaw. He pulled your ear closer to his mouth, making sure that you heard every word he said.

“I don’t care if you get in trouble- I’m not asking you to take sides. All I’m asking is for you to understand that this isn’t another petty complaint. This is our survival. The Halas can’t take this shit anymore.”

Complaints in Hell were rarely put under ‘urgent’. Since you had all the time in the world, you had no reason to put a complaint in that section. Also, adding a complaint there also meant that journalists and news outlets could view it - drawing attention to the whole ordeal.

You took a deep breath, thinking through your options carefully. You always prided yourself on remaining impartial but the severity of the situation at hand made you think otherwise.

“Fine.. I’ll do it,” you caved. “But you need to keep things calm on your end.”

Wooyoung smirked, stepping back from your desk. “Anything for my dear receptionist.”

Your face morphed in horror as he blew a kiss to you before leaving the room. You mulled over the whole situation that just came to light. This wasn’t just another day in Hell, it was the beginning of something way more sinister.

You typed out a formal complaint about the situation, the sounds of the keyboard being more overwhelming than usual.

You printed it out, giving it your stamp of approval - a kiss stain. You walked over to the other side of your office and finally dropped the paper into the ‘urgent’ chute.

.𖥔 ݁ ˖⊹₊ִ ࣪𖤐๋࣭ ⭑⊹₊ 𖥔.

“Sire, look at this,” Duke Seonghwa said while holding a newspaper article in his hands.

The lord looked up from his desk, his interest piqued. Seonghwa’s expression was unusually troubled and the urgency in his voice made it possible to ignore. He took the newspaper, his eyes scanning the headline.

“This can’t be true..” the lord muttered, his face darkened as he read further.

“The Halas have gotten bolder,” Seonghwa continued. “We cannot afford dismiss this as a another rumour.”

The lord’s eyes flicked back to Seonghwa’s, “Summon the rest here immediately, we need to address this.”

“Yes my lord,” Seonghwa replied, bowing slightly before scurrying off to find the others.

The lord reread the newspaper article again, fingers gripping the pages harder and harder, almost tearing them.

As the leader of the Eternals and the King of Hell, Lord Hongjoong knew that maintaining power was his absolute priority. Any threat to his title would not be taken lightly.

.𖥔 ݁ ˖⊹₊ִ ࣪𖤐๋࣭ ⭑⊹₊ 𖥔.

Not long after you filed the complaint, the atmosphere in your office shifted. The temperature seemed to drop and an eerie silence took over your surroundings. The neon red sign above your desk started to flicker violently.

The doors burst open with a deafening crash and several Eternals stormed in with their purple horns glistening ominously in the dim light.

“Receptionist!” a voice boomed, making you freeze in your place. “Explain this!” the demon held a crumpled newspaper article in front of you.

You kept your expression neutral, “General Mingi, that is a concern brought forth by a Hala.”

Mingi’s eyes narrowed as he took a step closer, “This isn’t just a ‘concern’, they’re revolting. How could you standby something this preposterous?”

The other demons behind him murmured in agreement. The air in the room grew thick with tension and you could feel their rage simmering from beneath their composed state.

“I’m not standing by the Halas, General,” you replied calmly. “It’s in everyone’s best interest to address the issue than to escalate it. Ignoring it could lead to disorder.”

Mingi wrinkled his nose, his words sharp and filled with malice, “Know your place, Walker. You’re here to serve, not test our authority.”

He signaled his troop with a flick of the wrist and they began to walk of the room, stepping on the debris they created.

You let out a deep sigh. You were relieved that they left you alone. However, you knew that the Eternals would go above and beyond to get their way.

For centuries, the Eternals have been known in their attempts to get rid of the Halas. The Eternals believed that the Halas were unworthy of sharing the same realm as them. To them, the Halas were a stain in an otherwise perfect Hell.

Efforts to rid the Halas have been unsuccessful, after all, they did make up for the majority of the population. Due to their population size, it had been getting tougher to assign jobs fairly to each of them.

Even as Hell’s receptionist, you’re unable to do much for the issue. All you could do was file complaints that angered someone. You found yourself caught in the middle, witnessing a storm brewing right in front of your eyes.

You filed a maintenance complaint, hoping that your door would get fixed by next day. You gathered your things and quickly dashed out of the door - at the end of the day, you wouldn’t want to get jumped by a demon, would you?

.𖥔 ݁ ˖⊹₊ִ ࣪𖤐๋࣭ ⭑⊹₊ 𖥔.

As you scurried back home, weaving through the streets, you felt someone grab your hand before dragging you to a dark alleyway.

“What the-“

“What are you trying to pull, Walker?” the hooded figure hissed as he pinned you to the wall.

You scoffed. “Who do you think you are?” With a swift motion, you kicked the figure in the stomach, causing him to release his hold. Taking the chance, you reached up and yanked his hood down, revealing his identity.

“Duke?” you exclaimed in surprise when you saw Seonghwa’s face.

You’ve never seen the Duke in real life, only in photographs - which did not do his gorgeous features justice. He always stood next to Lord Hongjoong, rarely leaving his side.

“What are you doing out of the palace? I thought you were the king’s boy-toy?” you asked with a smirk.

“Don’t talk to me like that, Walker,” he spat out, his voice oozing with venom. “Don’t defy me.”

“I’ll ‘defy’ anyone that drags me to a random alley,” you retorted.

With a snarl, he lunged forward, throwing a punch at your face. You ducked in time, feeling the wind from his fist that nearly hit his target. You countered with a kick to his shin, causing him to stumble back with a curse.

He went at you again, his movements fuelled with fury. You dodged his blows with ease - each strike he aimed at you slowly getting more aggressive.

You finally saw an opening. You managed to catch him off guard and delivered a powerful punch to the gut, leaving him gasping for air. As he staggered back in pain, you took a step back, preparing yourself for whatever he would do next.

Surprisingly, he stayed down. His hands clutched his stomach and he wheezed for breath. For a moment, the alleyway was filled with the sounds of his laboured breathing. Did you really hit him that hard?

“Shit- how are you so strong?” he coughed out, his eyes meeting yours.

“I thought it was common knowledge that all Walkers are trained in combat,” you replied, confused. “And I’m not that good.. I think you’re just weak..”

Seonghwa flipped you off before you threw him a mini med-kit that you carried with you at all times.

“I’d prefer it if you didn’t tell anyone about this,” you said. “It’s not only bad for me- it’s embarrassing for you. You challenged a Walker to a fight without any skills.”

He rolled his eyes in annoyance as he gave a small nod. Seonghwa started to patch himself up, placing band-aids over the scratches on his body.

You gave him a sly grin, “Sit still and look pretty next time.” With a cackle, you decided to take your leave. You didn’t know whether Seonghwa contacted his friends and you didn’t want to risk getting caught by staying longer.

You bolted home, clutching your bag close to yourself. Despite the turn of events today, you couldn’t help but feel a rush of adrenaline. Things were becoming too boring in Hell - maybe a revolt is necessary.

author’s note: please make sure to support my fic - all likes and reposts are much appreciated. any feedback is welcome <3

feel free to ask if you want to be on a taglist!

series taglist - @binchanluvrr @hiddlestandom @avantalem @hecateslittlewitchling @iarayara @thunderous-wolf

[idlerin]

PHANTASMA

a haikyuu social media modern fantasy au

pairing. miya atsumu x f!reader

synopsis. someone was trying to kill miya atsumu. you don’t know who, well, what exactly was going to try and suck the life out of him (probably quite literally). what you do know is that you have to protect him—bound by oath and protocol—whether you liked it or not. out of everyone in campus, you just had to be assigned to the most arrogant and obnoxious of the bunch. this wasn’t your first rodeo but it was going to be the first pain in the ass.

tags. social media au, college au, modern fantasy au, horror (slight), comedy (yes, uhm hopefully), romance is a subplot (bc this is gonna be mostly plot-ish heavy, mostly world building and will include lots of side characters), forced proximity, atsumu is a piece of shit, you hate each other !

warnings. i cant think of much, graphic descriptions? (bc supernaturals n stuff), time stamps arent important !

status. on-going (06/19/24 —)

may the inferno bless you,

00. defend and protect

01. conflict of interest

02. im watching you

03. stalker freak

04.

05.

tba !

taglist is OPEN ! [slots taken: 20/50]

to be added to the taglist you can just send in an ask or comment :)

notes. so this is like such an experiment lmao but i wanted to try mixing the social media and modern fantasy aspect ! so the story will be told in images and through a phone (crazy technology) i will cheat sometimes and use phone calls tho heheheeheh. anyways love sick will be the priority still this is my silly little side project inspired by my fav manga (tbhk) and the book ninth house (i use the term gray from there). fun fact abt me is i read mostly fantasy books but im a romance writer lol.

themes inspired by tbhk and ninth house is not mine but the overall content of this smau is. please do not repost this on any other platform. © idlerin 2024

[holllandtrash]

6 to 1 | lando norris (part 2)

paring: lando norris x leclerlc!reader part 2 in the 6 to 1 series (read part 1 here)

you're a bit of a flirt, the drivers understand that even if charles doesn't and recently you've been a little less careful about your interactions in the paddock. you'd think that would deter lando, but he's still committed to moving up your ranking, no matter what it takes

word count: 6.1k tags: established friendships, minor social media au aspects, poorly translated French

“What’s it going to take for you to love me?”

Lando practically forced you away from your brother and Carlos as you walked behind them. You were staring down at your phone and didn’t even see the McLaren driver headed your way so it was safe to say you were startled when he grabbed your wrist to pull you aside.

You pushed your sunglasses up to your head, “Excuse me?”

Lando sighed, as if having to repeat himself was such an inconvenience. “What’s it going to take for you to love me?”

At this point, Carlos and Charles had noticed you stopped following them and were making their way back to you. Carlos was amused at your interaction whereas Charles was uncertain. He couldn’t tell what Lando’s motives were or if they went beyond moving up your driver ranking.

You pretended to think about it for a second and Lando looked hopeful, as if there were genuine steps he could take to get you to like him more.

You counted on your fingers, “Be about four inches taller, for starters,” You held out a second finger, “Have darker features and…” a third finger, “Don’t be a Formula 1 driver.”

Lando wasn’t impressed with your answers, mostly because they didn’t help at all and you weren’t being the least bit serious. Instead of trying to get some real information out of you, he reacted like a child and yanked your sunglasses off your head before turning and running down the paddock.

You cupped your hands around your mouth to help with the volume of your voice, “This is why you’re fifth on my ranking!”

Carlos waited until you rejoined him and Charles before asking about the sudden change, “I thought he was sixth?”

“Oh, I mean-” you waved your hand outwards, “yeah he worked his way up, I guess. By default.” 

“By default?” Charles asked. You weren’t making any sense, but you also weren’t about to explain why Lando was now fifth, nor did you know how to explain why Pierre had been dropped without coming clean about hooking up with him.

Your shoulders tensed, “Yeah, I-”

“Hold on,” Charles came to a sudden halt. He pulled his sunglasses off his face and looked back and forth between you and Carlos. Neither of you knew what he was doing, but you felt obligated to freeze until he opened his mouth again. “Is Carlos your ideal man?”

It took you a second to figure out how Charles came to that conclusion, but you did say to Lando if he was four inches taller and had dark features, you’d love him. Which practically described Carlos. The only thing was, Charles was missing an important detail.

“Carlos is a Formula 1 driver. I don't date drivers.” you pointed out, starting your walk to the garage again. Carlos moved at your pace, draping his arm over your shoulder as Charles tagged along behind you two.

“What if I wasn’t a driver?” Carlos asked, a playful smile on his lips. 

You smacked his chest, “No.”

“No,” Charles repeated, much louder. “Y/N, I am going to take away your paddock access if you don’t stop flirting with the grid.”

You held up your hand and stuck up your middle finger, a beaming grin on your face knowing Charles was staring at it with betrayal. Carlos laughed, tugging you into his side as you continued walking, leaving Charles to mutter a string of complaints the entire way down the paddock.

“So Lando made it to your top five?” Carlos asked, reaching for a pair of Ferrari headphones to hand to you. 

“Unfortunately.”

“And where am I on this list?”

You slid the bright red headset over your ears, rolling your eyes, “Bold of you to assume you’re in my top five.”

“Of course I am,” there was a glint in his eye as he walked you to the visitor booth at the back of the garage. He waited until you stepped up to lean against the barrier, crossing his arms over it as he looked up at you. “Charles is probably first, which means I am second, no?”

You didn’t confirm or deny where the Ferrari driver stood, deciding to just press your palm to his forehead to push him away from the booth. Carlos laughed and before he could gear up to get into his car, you wished him good luck for the qualifying session. 

You caught that faint sliver of a smile he sent you before sliding his helmet on and it took most of your attention that you flinched when you noticed Charles standing next to you. As you placed your hand on your chest to steady your heart, you couldn’t help but notice his scowl.

“What is your problem?” You asked, dropping the headset to rest around your neck. You wanted Charles to know that he had all of your attention because clearly something was bothering him. And if he performed poorly during qualifying because of it, he’d blame you. 

“I don’t like it,” his gaze was stuck on his teammate, watching as Carlos chatted with the employee assisting him with his helmet strap. 

But you weren’t following. Your brother seemed to be referring to a made up scenario he came up with that involved yourself and Carlos and the thought alone made you laugh. As in, tip your head back and cackle so loud that people turned over their shoulders to see what sort of animal just wandered into the garage.

Even Carlos looked at you. Through his helmet and with his faint head tilt, you could tell he was wondering what was so funny. You did your best to get your humorous expression under control and turned back to Charles.

“I don’t actually like Carlos, you know that right?” He had to have known that. Charles made it clear time and time again that he would figure out a way to kick you out of the Leclerc family if you started dating a driver, hence why you were so on edge about Pierre running his mouth around the paddock.

“You flirt with him a lot,” was his only reasoning. 

“I think you’re looking for a reason to be annoyed with me.”

“Well I mean-” Charles shrugged a shoulder, “I don’t know, Y/N, tone it down a bit, is all.”

“Just get in the car and focus on qualifying,” you pushed on his shoulder right as someone handed him his helmet.  

Charles definitely looked like he had more he wanted to say, but now was not the time to get into it. You gave him a thumbs up before he turned around, making the smart decision to put his focus into the upcoming sessions than to worry about you.

A friend of yours sent you the twitter thread after qualifying had ended and you thought that replying to it would not only be funny, but put some rumours to rest.

You definitely did post Carlos a lot, but you were with him a lot. It was just something that happened. 

But you had no idea how the photos of you and each of the drivers surfaced. You tried to be careful and not be outwardly flirtatious or cross any lines, even as a joke, in public, but it seemed like some fans were starting to get suspicious. 

You stepped into the paddock, water bottle in your grasp, your hand acting as a shield from the rare Montreal sun seeing as everyone expected this weekend to be a wet one. 

“You look like you could use some sunglasses.”

Lando’s little tease had you stopping in your tracks. Your arm fell to your side as you turned on your heels and watched as the McLaren driver pushed himself away from a flag pole to walk towards you. How long had he been standing there? His racing suit undone and hung horribly low on his hips as his black fireproof long sleeve clung to his body.

“Don’t you have media to do or something?” You pestered, eyeing your sunglasses that he tucked into his collar, looking extremely out of place compared to the rest of his driving attire. 

Lando stepped forward and you flinched when he raised a single finger up to your forehead, tracing his fingertip over the lines above your eyebrows, “You shouldn’t squint, you’ll get wrinkles.”

“Maybe if I had my sunglasses-” you reached for the accessory but Lando’s reaction time had you beat by miles. He jumped back and his laughter rang through your ears. 

He adjusted them on his collar and when you realised you weren’t going to win this battle, you figured it wasn’t even worth it to fight. 

And if he held onto them for the rest of the day, he’d have an excuse to find you later to give them back. 

Not that you wanted that. 

But you also didn’t not want that. 

You didn’t know what you wanted, all you knew was that Lando confused you and each time you saw him this weekend so far, you held your breath or rolled your eyes or sometimes both. 

Right now it was both as he sauntered to your side, draping his arm over your shoulder casually, as if you weren’t surrounded by people with cameras and smartphones with the ability to pick up on this little exchange and ultimately spin a story out of it. 

Lando didn’t care, he had something else on his mind.

“Did you see where I placed?”

“Place what?”

He knew that you knew what he was talking about and the fact that you were making him work for it was, purposely, annoying. He tugged harshly on a handful of your hair which resulted in you pinching his side as retaliation. Lando knocked your water bottle out of your hand and jumped back to put space between you before you could yank on his driver suit, which you were trying to do. 

You were children, essentially. Anyone walking by would see a couple of twenty-something year olds play fighting. You with a glare on your face and Lando with a cheeky grin because you picked up your water bottle and tried to throw it at him and the fucker managed to catch it like it was nothing.

“Qualifying, you little shit,” Lando finally clarified when he sensed you had given up on this immature battle. He tossed the bottle up and caught it with ease, still wearing that same smile. “I start fifth tomorrow.”

“Is that supposed to impress me?” 

He winded his arm back and pretended to throw the bottle at you. Automatically, you held your hand up in defence and squinted, bracing yourself for an impact that never came. Instead, Lando stepped forward and grabbed your hand to lower it, a non verbal assurance that he wouldn't actually throw a water bottle at you…this time. 

You noticed that his fingers lingered on yours longer than they should have. Lando did too and he handed over your drink, raising his hand to scratch the back of his neck to play off whatever that little gesture was.

“Lance starts tenth,” he pointed out.

Just to piss him off, you clenched your hand to your chest and sighed dreamily, “My Canadian hero.”

“He starts tenth!” Lando repeated himself, much louder this time. “Come on, Y/N, this has to move me up your ranking.”

“Qualifying higher doesn’t mean you get points,” you weren’t about to let him get his hopes up. “Finish ahead of Lance tomorrow and I’ll see about bumping you up to fourth.”

“You are cruel.”

“You sound funny when you say that,” the corner of your lips curled upwards when his British accent made the ‘r’ sound in cruel come across more like crool. 

“You sound funny.”

“Good burn, you really got me,” your words were layered with heavy sarcasm and you watched as Lando rolled his eyes. You two could probably set a world record for the amount of time eye rolls are exchanged in a single conversation. 

“I don’t actually mean that,” Lando suddenly flipped a switch, his cheekiness being replaced by a bashful smile. “I like your accent. I like when you speak French, even if I don’t understand it.”

You could have thanked him for the compliment, if it could have even been considered one, but that wasn’t the type of friendship you had with Lando. You liked making his life difficult and in return, he liked to annoy you.

So you stepped up to him until there was only a few inches between your bodies. He seemed confused when you placed your hand on the side of his cheek, a soft gesture, one to purposely mislead him.

“Oh Lando,” you whispered, your smile growing warm. “Tu as le QI d'une huitre.”

You watched as Lando tried to piece together what you had just told him and he definitely was hoping it was polite because the way your voice sounded like silk made him think you were giving him a compliment. But Lando knew you, so he wasn’t counting on it. 

“Tu as..” he mumbled to himself as you laughed. “Huitre? What is that? What’s that mean?”

You patted his cheek, deciding it was best to let him figure it out on his own. He probably wouldn’t have, let’s be honest here, but as luck would have it, Lando spotted one of the two French drivers on the grid headed in their direction. 

Lando waved him over and you watched as Pierre slid his phone into his pocket, figuring that the conversation he was about to walk into was much more entertaining than whatever his phone could offer him. 

Much like Lando, Pierre still wore his driver's suit, the upper half unzipped and hanging loose around his hips. He greeted Lando with a fist bump and congratulated him on his P5 starting position, and then he turned to you. 

Your relationship with Pierre wasn’t awkward, but this was the first time you’ve seen him since finding out he told half the grid you slept together. In his eyes, nothing was wrong but you were uneasy around him. He gave your arm a gentle squeeze, something he often did when he walked past and just had time for a quick hello, something that you used to love because it told you that Pierre wasn’t disregarding you, he cared about you. And now you found yourself tensing, just for a moment, but you simply didn’t want him touching you. 

You thought that you putting on a good poker face and acting normally, but Lando noticed right away how apprehensive you were about Pierre's gesture. Instead of allowing there to be a lull in conversation for Pierre to also notice and call you out on it, Lando acted fast. He draped his arm over your shoulders and pulled you closer to his side, creating a bigger gap between you and Pierre. 

“Gasly can you translate something for me?” Lando asked him. “Little Leclerc here said ‘tu as le huitre’ what the hell does that mean?”

“Tu as le que huitre…” Pierre shook his head seeing as Lando was missing a few words. “That doesn’t make any- oh, tu as le QI d'une huitre.” He looked at you, a smile curling up on his lips as he continued talking to you in French, “Oui? C'est ce que vous avez dit?” That’s what you said?

You nodded, but part of you hated that Lando couldn’t understand your words. You didn’t want to be able to have a private conversation with Pierre, you didn’t even want to talk to him right now. Lando being left out left you open to a sense of vulnerability with Pierre.

So you switched back to English, “He told me he liked when I spoke French.”

Pierre chuckled, “I don’t think that’s what he had in mind.”

Lando tightened his arm around you, putting you in a headlock for a second, “Will someone please tell me-”

“You have the IQ of an oyster, mate,” Pierre interjected, ending the translation with laughter. “That’s what Y/N said.”

Lando tilted his chin to look down at you, brows pinched, eyes narrowed, lips pressed together tighter. He was definitely taking back that compliment right about now and all you could do was offer him a guilty smile.

“I’m a lot smarter than an oyster,” 

“Okay.”

“Why are you so cruel to me?”

“Why do you pronounce cruel like crool?” 

Lando squinted at you, not able to come up with a suitable answer. And because you were finally within reach, you took this opportunity to snatch your sunglasses from the collar of his shirt and slide them on your face.

“Am I missing something here?” Pierre suddenly asked. Both you and the McLaren driver turned to him. Pierre was wagging his finger between the two of you, looking as if he was trying to solve a puzzle and somewhere between the close contact of you and Lando he'd find the last piece.

You shook Lando’s arm off of you, “What do you mean?”

“You’re-” he stopped short, licking his lips before changing his choice of wording. “I don’t know, Y/N, you don’t usually flirt out in the open like this.”

You crossed your arms over your chest, “Excuse me?”

Pierre held up a hand defensively and tried to play the observation off with a breath of laughter, “I’m not wrong. It’s entertaining, for sure, but you’re always so worried about Charles seeing, are you not?”

Were you flirting? 

Every once and a while you’d flirt with Carlos, just for fun because you both knew it meant nothing.

But even Charles called you out on it earlier, for flirting with his teammate. Maybe you weren’t as subtle or maybe you just didn’t care if Charles was a witness to it anymore.

And Lando…honestly you weren’t even aware you were doing anything. You were just having fun, trying to get on his nerves while simultaneously hoping to make him smile. That wasn’t flirting, was it?

Or maybe Pierre was projecting. You never flirted publicly with him, he was your brother's best friend for christ's sake. Charles would find a way to ban you from the paddock if he caught wind of you two becoming a little too friendly. 

You went with that option. It was easier than admitting that you were in fact being careless.

“I think you’re a little jealous,” the corner of your lip twitched into a smirk. Even Lando tried to hide his snicker, probably having thought the same thing.

As soon as you said it though, you regretted it. You recognized the mischievous glint in Pierre’s eye, one that practically screamed he had no reason to be jealous of Lando. Lando wasn’t the one you slept with. Lando never saw you the way he did. 

And even though all three of you knew what took place, Pierre wasn’t going to say anything, still under the impression you were thinking he had kept it a secret. 

You didn’t want him getting away with it. You wanted to slap that arrogant expression right off his face. The last thing you wanted was for Pierre to be able to walk away from this conversation with a higher sense of self than he already had.

But you also weren’t going to cause a scene in the paddock. Whatever conversation you wanted to have with Pierre, could wait. 

“Good luck tomorrow,” you told him, forcing the wish through gritted teeth. You turned to Lando, “Where are you headed?”

“Where- what?” Lando repeated. 

“Where are you going right now?” You asked. “I’ll walk with you.”

Pierre got the hint. You were purposely ignoring him and making an effort to not include him in the paddock. Your body faced Lando’s, a physical barrier between you and Pierre and you had the feeling he would call you out on it later. He too wasn’t going to get into any of this in the middle of the paddock.

“McLaren motorhome,” Lando finally answered. He nodded his head towards Pierre, “I’ll see you later, mate.”

Pierre seemed a little annoyed, but said nothing as he turned around. You waited until he was out of earshot before releasing a heavy breath.

“I just don’t want to be around Pierre.”

“Yeah I think that was pretty obvious.”

He then nudged his elbow against yours, wanting you to uncross your arms and loosen up a little. You did, reluctantly, but it was easy to push Pierre out of your head when Lando was giving you one of his classic grins.

You started to back up, “I won’t actually walk with you, you’ve probably got-”

“I want you to walk with me, though,” he cut you off, starting off in the McLaren motorhome direction. “Just don’t call me an oyster.”

“I didn’t call you an Oyster.”

“Fine, don’t compare me to one.”

You glanced around, wondering if continuing on your walk with Lando was really the best idea right now. You enjoyed his company, but you didn’t want people to get the wrong idea. The more you accompanied him, the more likely people would be coming to their own conclusions.

But with Lando’s encouraging head nod beckoning you to walk with him, followed by a smile you really couldn’t say no to, you found yourself at his side, on the way to the motorhome. 

You tapped his arm with the back of his hand, “You know that this-” you gestured between yourself and him. “-we, you know, this whole thing it’s not- it’s not real, Lando.”

Lando seemed unaffected by your words, yet another rejection he was going to ignore, “What’s not real?”

“Like if I flirt with you, it doesn’t mean anything,” you clarified. 

He nodded once. And then again a few seconds later as if it really sunk in.

“Well, maybe if you let me take you out on a real date-”

You pushed your shoulder into his, shoving him towards the middle of the paddock as he laughed, the last of his sentence fading into the air. 

“Okay fine,” Lando cleared his throat, strolling back towards you after adjusting the suit on his hips. “What if I get a podium?”

“I’m not following.”

“Will you go on a date with me, a real one, if I land a podium tomorrow?”

You actually laughed at the thought. Lando rolled his eyes, trying not to be personally offended by your reaction.

“Lando, just focus on your race,” you said, trying to mask your amusement by scratching the corner of your lip. “If you do better than Lance, maybe you’ll move up the ranking. A date isn’t going to do anything to help you.”

He shrugged innocently, “What if I just want to go on a date with you?”

“Why?”

“Why?” He repeated back, quite loudly might you add. You both looked around you but no one was paying either of you any attention, “Y/N come on, why wouldn’t I want to go on a date with you? You’re-” he took in a sharp inhale, “I mean, you’re stunning, for starters.”

“That’s it?” You raised your eyebrows. “My appearance? That’s all I have going for me?” You swiftly turned on your heels, “See ya’ later, Norris.”

“Hey, no, come on now.”

 Lando was quick to grab hold of your wrist and tug you back. The sudden turn made you stumble over your own feet and you fell directly into his chest. Lando’s hand slid up your arm to help you regain your balance, but he didn’t let go of you once you were upright again. 

He took a breath.

“When I see you during race weekends, my mood instantly improves,” Lando said, but he didn’t say it in a way that told you this was a sudden realisation. This was something he had known for a while, but never shared with you. “You’re so fun. I can be myself around you and you also grew up around motorsport so you’re familiar with this lifestyle. And I love talking to you, Y/N, even if it's just for a few minutes before I have to go to qualifying or- or now as we walk down the paddock and then go our separate ways. Your looks are- well they're definitely a plus, but they're not why I like you. I promise.”

You were speechless. 

Genuinely, not a single word came to mind. Lando wasn’t one to just spurt out a string of compliments, let alone to you. 

“Has it ever crossed your mind that maybe I want to go on a date because I just like spending time with you?” 

“But the-” your mouth felt dry. “My ranking?”

Lando shrugged, “Well if I move up then that’s just an added bonus.”

Still, you were hesitant. His words were heartwarming, probably the nicest things you’ve heard in a long time, but you couldn’t just casually agree to go out with him. 

The only upside was, Lando scoring a podium in his McLaren was extremely rare. He had yet to so far this season, it was unlikely one would come for him tomorrow.

“Fine,” you nodded firmly. “If you get a podium, I’ll go out with you.”

Lando seemed taken aback, like he didn’t think you’d actually say yes. Any other day, you wouldn’t have. But the podium ultimatum and his strangely out of pocket compliments pushed you towards possibly giving him a chance. 

“What if I win?”

“Don’t push it.”

Lando’s head tipped back as he chuckled, “Come on, what if I win?”

Your arms flailed out to your side as you thought of something on the spot, “I don’t know, Lando. I’ll sleep with you.”

Lando’s eyes widened more than you thought possible and his jaw fell open. His grip on your arm loosened, probably because he couldn’t focus on anything other than staring right at you, completely frozen. 

You lifted your hand to his chin to gently close his mouth, “I was joking.”

“But- you-” Lando sputtered, having trouble forming a coherent thought. “You can’t just say that. For Christ's sake, how am I supposed to do anything for the rest of the day?”

“Again, it was a joke,” you felt the need to repeat yourself so Lando didn’t get any hopes up. He was a guy. And like most guys, they thought with their dicks 9 out of 10 times. “Just focus on the race, okay?”

Lando’s head fell backwards and he looked up to the clear sky, looking for some sort of higher figure that could give him the answers he wanted. You patted his cheek before playfully pushing him in the direction of the McLaren motorhome. 

“I’m going to go find Charles,” you said, using his silence as a reason to part ways. 

You barely got a few feet away from Lando when he snapped out of his little daze and called after you, “But you weren’t joking about the date, right?”

“Focus on the race, Lando!” You called back, cupping the side of your mouth. You watched as he gave you one last eye roll and you’d be lying if you said you didn’t notice him trying to subtly adjust himself through his racing suit. 

When you left to go find your brother, you had no idea that Lando would be replaying your words in his head for the remainder of the day. 

If you get a podium, I’ll go out with you.

And if I win?

I’ll sleep with you. 

He knew it was a joke, the sleeping with him part, but that didn’t mean it didn’t motivate him.

You were clueless to the fact that Lando paid more attention than normal during his post qualifying debrief. He usually gave the team anywhere from 90-95% of full focus, discussing his results, the strategies for tomorrow and everything in between. But today, it was 110%. Asking more questions and repeating them back for clarification. He wanted to get the most out of the car tomorrow, he wanted the date with you.

When you were sitting in the hotel lobby, chatting with a member of the Ferrari team, you weren’t paying attention when Lando walked through the doors. Up until now, neither of you were aware you were even in the same hotel, but Lando spotted you quickly. How could he not? Your captivating eyes and bold smile lit up the lobby at the end of a busy day. He was tired and ready for bed, but if you had noticed him and invited him to sit down, he would have happily nestled onto the couch next to you.

And Lando didn’t know that when someone called his name, you heard it. A faint ‘Lando’ echoed through your ear and momentarily pulled you away from your conversation. You weren’t trying to be rude when you looked over your shoulder and away from the team member, but you wanted to know if Lando was really in the room.

Sure enough, the second you found him leaning against the corner in the elevator, the doors slowly started to shut. He was looking down at his phone and hadn’t been watching you, but you didn’t know that he had been watching you up until he stepped into that steel box.

If you had caught his eye a second earlier, you probably would have ended your conversation and caught up with him to join him on the ride up. Just so you could have a few extra seconds to chat with him, see if you could an eye roll or two out of him before going your separate ways again.

Because for some reason, you really fucking liked talking to him too. He annoyed you at times, but in a way where you couldn’t actually stay mad and found some joy between his teasing. You could be yourself around him too, there weren’t any guards up around Lando. 

You could admit you hung around outside the doors of the Ferrari motorhome longer than normal on Sunday, just in case Lando walked by. Was it so wrong that you wanted to wish him well before the race?

But as luck would have it, Lando wasn’t the driver to walk by and grab your attention. You looked up from your phone just in time to see Pierre making his way up the bright red steps. 

“Can we talk?” He asked, but he only phrased it as a question for show. He wasn’t going to give you an option to walk away. Pierre leaned against the railing opposite of you. 

“About?” You slid your phone into your pocket, head tilted innocently at the French driver.

“Yesterday,” he said. “There was just a bit of tension, Y/N, and don’t tell me there wasn’t any. I just want to know if we’re okay.”

You played dumb, “Why wouldn’t we?”

“Well I-”

“Because I was under the impression we would act as though what happened at Christmas didn’t happen,” you interjected sharply, a hint of sarcasm in your voice as you let Pierre piece together what you knew. “I sort of assumed that we would move on and be friends and that we wouldn’t tell anyone. So unless…something changed…why would there be tension, Pierre?”

You practically spelled it out for him. Something had in fact changed. Pierre didn’t know how to keep his mouth shut.

He dragged his hand over his face, “What did Lando say?”

“It doesn’t matter what Lando said!” You exclaimed with a bitter laugh. “We agreed to not say anything and yet you’ve gone and told half the grid!”

“Half the grid is a bit of a stretch.”

“I’ve told no one.”

“Well it’s different for you.”

“You’re such an ass,” you scoffed. “I don’t want Charles finding out, Pierre.”

“He won’t!” 

“He will if you don’t stop talking to people about what happened six months ago,” you started to ascend up the stairs, having had enough of this conversation.

You had just reached for the handle when Pierre suddenly yelled out, “I’m sorry.”

All you could do was glance over your shoulder, “If you were sorry, you wouldn’t have done it, Pierre. We both knew sleeping together was a mistake but I didn’t regret it,” you paused, releasing a soft breath. “Now I do.”

You walked into the motorhome without giving him another chance to apologise and you stayed there until it was time to head down to the garage. All hopes of seeing Lando had now vanished, you didn’t want to step outside and see anyone.

Was Lando disappointed when he walked past Ferrari and didn’t see you anywhere? A little, but he wouldn’t admit it. He thought maybe he’d catch you before the race, most drivers headed towards the garages at the same time anyway.

And when that time came, he spotted the bright red attire of Carlos and Charles, but you weren’t anywhere to be found. He even went the long way to the McLaren garage just to try and sneak a glance into Ferrari and see you in the visitor booth, but you weren’t there.

You didn’t show up until minutes before the cars were wheeled out towards the grid. You wished Charles good luck and grabbed a headset, finding a spot in the booth beside the VIP guests and family members. 

When you glanced at the screen, your eyes landed on Lando sitting in fifth.

You would always root for a Ferrari 1-2, but what if Lando found himself on the podium today? 

There were no words exchanged since you left him in the paddock yesterday. You doubted the date idea was forgotten about, but you wondered how serious Lando was about using it as motivation. 

Not wanting to think too much about it, you focused on the race, something you've been telling the drivers to do for the last 24 hours. 

The first ten laps, nothing happened. Charles kept his second place position, Lando dropped down to seventh.

By lap 11, George, who was in third, spun out, taking himself out of the race and Checo as well. 

The safety car helped Lando catch up and because two cars were officially retired, he found himself in fifth, fighting for fourth. 

A close call from Max earned him a five second grid penalty and when he went into the pits, his team unintentionally screwed him over. The wrong tyre was grabbed and his pit stop, that shouldn’t have been any longer than 8 seconds, ended up being almost twenty. Equivalent to an hour during a race.

Suddenly Lando was in fourth.

Charles led the race, Carlos behind, Lewis in third.

There was no way Lando had better pace than Lewis, not in that shitbox of a McLaren that seemed to provide horrible results week after week.

But then Lewis started struggling with degradation and Lando was catching up. 

It was nearing lap 67 by the time Lando was within DRS range. You held your breath each time he activated it, letting his rear wing open. Each corner brought him closer and closer to Lewis. 

And you had no idea what his end result was. When it became clear that the team was going to get a Ferrari 1-2, the crowd of you ran towards the gates to be able to celebrate with the drivers when they parked. As much as you wanted to see the battle between Lewis and Lando, you had to be there for your brother. 

So you ran with the team, screaming in excitement when the chequered flag was waved at the end of lap 70. Charles taking home a win, Carlos close behind. They parked their cars in front of the banners labelled 1 and 2 and shared a congratulatory hug after stepping out of the cockpits.

But who got third?

Your view was blocked, you genuinely had no idea who crossed the line after Carlos. You wouldn’t know until the third place car finished their cool down lap and pulled in, which should be happening any second now. 

You gave your brother a hug, squeezing his arms, all while keeping an eye at the end of the lane. 

And then your question was answered. 

The bright orange car drove up and came to a sudden halt in front of the third place banner. The McLaren crew crowded the barrier next to everyone from Ferrari, ready to congratulate the British driver.

Time froze for you as he climbed out of the car, fisting pumping the air. This was his first podium this season. He was overjoyed, he was walking on air, he was on top of the fucking world. 

And then he took his helmet off and spotted you. 

Lando should have gone directly for his team. He should have jumped into their arms and celebrated with them, but he used Carlos as an excuse to be near you. He patted Carlos on the back, the two of them sharing the same level of excitement, before he turned to you. 

You held your breath as he leaned in, a wicked smile on his face, he didn’t even care that he was surrounded by a sea of red or that his team was waiting for him or that the media was definitely catching how you were the first person he approached after landing himself a podium.

You barely caught his eye before he dipped his face towards your ear, speaking only loud enough for you to catch his words. 

“You free tonight?"

All you could do was nod.

Lando pulled away, but not before brushing his hand over your arm, sending a chill down your spine.

"Perfect."

-

masterlist here | part 3 in the series here taglist: @moneymasnn @thotd-f1 @masonspulisic