#then I might choose the wrong ones and need something else for a build I wanna do down the line

[nightmareonpeachstreet]

got my Alcryst up to +4 on the legendary remix today. he started at +1 so today I was very carefully mulling over who to give 3 sets of his skills to before merging him

happy to say that Kagero, Halloween Niles and Setsuna all got some very good skills

[hannieoftheyear]

sexting with Mingyu pt.2

how much does a relationship (more like a 'forced to coexist' acquaintance) change after sexting? the result may shock you.

this is part 2 of my sexting au! you can check out part 1 here

genre: kim mingyu x fem reader, pwp, smut with fluff at the end, MDNI!

warnings: switch mingyu, lotss of teasing, fingering, cum eating, protected penetration, he has a big dick, size kink if you squint.

w.c: 6k hehe

note: thank you so much for the support on the first part♡ I hope you like this, and I'm sorry if there are any mistakes

Kim Mingyu: guys I told Seokminnie to come at 9😊 [15:36 pm]

Kim Mingyu: come to my place at 8 so we can arrange everything🙏

Kim Mingyu: and don’t forget to bring the stuff on the list😁

The new text from the group chat made exclusively for tonight’s surprise party lights up your screen, taking your attention away from the tv show you were watching.

You have the urge to ask why he decided the time on the same day, but you don’t. You have a feeling that things are still a little awkward, and you never talked much anyways so it would be weird.

These few days, even if you tried not to, the only thing occupying your mind was your little chat with Mingyu.

Can sexting change your view of a person? That sounds so stupid. You were never mean to him, on purpose at least, and you would always think twice before going somewhere if he was going too. But now, you find yourself a little excited at the idea of seeing him.

You have about four hours to get ready and half an hour to get to Mingyu’s place. There’s plenty of time, so you finish the episode of New Girl you were re-watching and begin to get ready.

You absolutely do not think about seeing Mingyu for the first time since your… conversation. Not during your shower, where you shave your whole body. Not while picking a cute outfit you don’t usually wear that flatters your body and shows off your boobs. And absolutely not while doing your make up, you just happen to choose a red lipstick that has been sitting collecting dust since you bought it. There’s nothing wrong with trying different things sometimes!

Looking in the mirror, you realize that maybe you went a little overboard, not enough so that your friends would think it’s on purpose, but it is definitely noticeable.

Whatever. You’ll welcome whatever attention you might get. There’s no time to change anyway. You have to leave now, or you’ll be late, so you grab your purse and go out.

You were tasked to bring the cake, so you drop by the cake shop a few blocks from your home and take a taxi afterward. It was a simple two tiered pink cake that said “Happy Birthday," but looking at it, already seated on the cab, you can’t help feeling like you’re forgetting something.

Checking the list over and over again doesn’t help. It only says “cake" and your name beside it. You’re thinking about what could possibly be so obviously necessary that no one thought to write it down. And then you remember, CANDLES! Painfully, obviously, and pretty needed for a birthday cake.

It’s too late to go back now because you’re already 2 minutes away.

It’s fine.

It’s completely fine.

You’re sure someone else might have thought about it and will bring some. Mingyu has to have candles around just in case the power goes out. Maybe in the box there’s a candle the cake shop puts just in case.

The taxi leaves you at 8 pm sharp at Mingyu’s building. You try to calm down during the elevator ride, and it’s not until you’re at the door, knocking, that you remember at whose house you’re at. And realize that it’s just a little bit too quiet inside.

Mingyu opens the door, knowing it’s you on the other side. You’re always the first one to arrive.

You know you should be more put together, but you’re left without words at the sight of him. His hair is pushed back, a little wet still. He was probably on the shower while you were on the way. His outfit is simple, black jeans and a white t-shirt, but it somehow looks amazing on him. How does someone make a plain white t-shirt look so good? It’s almost unfair to everyone else.

Too lost in thought, you don’t realize you have the same effect on him. He’s left breathless by the sight of you. He thinks you have never looked this beautiful.

A door opens at the end of the hallway, and the sound takes you both out of your trance. He’s the first one to speak.

“Hey sorry, come on in.” Mingyu says with an embarrassed tone you almost don’t catch. He moves to the side to let you through and speaks up again. “You’re first like always.”

“Yeah, they can’t be punctual at all." You’re standing awkwardly looking at the cake in your hands while he closes the door.

“Should I put this in the fridge?" Your eyes point to the cake Mingyu didn’t register before.

“Sure let me -" He tries taking it from your hands, but you back away.

“I can do it.” It comes out drier than you want to, so you look him in the eyes and show him a little smile. Even if your “friendship” didn’t change drastically in a matter of days, you don’t want to still have a rocky relationship. That seems to make him relax.

“There should be enough room.” You hear him say as you’re walking towards the kitchen.

You know his apartment like the palm of your hand by now. It seems like he’s the only one willing to have many people over at once, so the hangouts are always here.

He follows behind you and stands in the kitchen while you try to figure out the best way to store it without getting it damaged.

“Oh I should tell you I forgot the candles, I’m sorry I don’t know why I didn’t think about it but I remembered on the way here and it was too late, but I thought maybe you had some here but if not we can just ask the guys I’m sure some of them aren’t even on the way yet and-" You turn around after you place the cake on the fridge and you blurt out the apology, only to find Mingyu standing right behind you.

He's so close you can smell his cologne. The one he always uses that you secretly love and wish you could steal, but he doesn’t have to know that. His body so close to yours does not affect you. In any way.

“I bought them don’t worry.” You sigh, relieved that you didn’t ruin anything with your stupid mistake.

“Oh thank God!" You start and look at him in the eyes, “Thank you, really. I was panicking on the elevator. I thought I ruined the cake because-"

“You should be a rapper." Mingyu suddenly interrupts you.

“What?” You look at him, very confused by his statement, and he just laughs.

“You just said 50 words in like two seconds.” He adds in between laughs.

“Don’t laugh at me!” You punch him lightly on one arm, “I was actually worried!” You really try to sound mad, but his laugh is awfully contagious and brings you to laugh with him.

“I don’t think you spoke that many words to me in years." He suddenly says, still laughing, but your smile dies slowly because you realize he’s right.

“Yeah well…” You’re looking at him directly in the eyes. His smile is still plastered on his face, a little faded but there nevertheless.

Your eyes move to the side, to not make eye contact with him as you say “Things change.”

The atmosphere shifts as fast as a heartbeat. You’re suddenly very aware of your body so close to his. Mingyu’s gaze wander to your lips a second too long before it goes back to your eyes. Slowly, he begins closing in the space between your bodies. You step back but find yourself caged in between him and the counter.

His warmth embraces you when he places an arm on your side to cage you in more. He has to crouch to look you right in the eyes. “How?” You barely register his question, his closeness making you dizzy. “What?”

“What changed?” For sure he’s trying to take a reaction out of you, and you hate that he’s succeeding. But you can have your fun too.

“You know… when you make a guy cum in his pants your relationship changes.”

He doesn’t seem affected by your response, quite the opposite, actually. He might be enjoying it, judging by the smirk forming on his mouth.

“You know damn well I did not cum in my pants”

“Didn’t you? Huh… I guess I wasn’t that impressed because I would remember otherwise.” Impressed you were. And remember you do. But you like annoying him.

He sighs, acting shocked as he puts his right hand on his chest. “How could you?” You giggle at his silliness.

But his arms are back to caging you in a millisecond. “I’ll have to make you remember then.”

You can’t resist it when your eyes drop from his eyes to his lips, suddenly calling to you like he’s got you under a spell. He seems to notice because his smirk makes a reappearance.

So slow, you barely even notice, his face comes closer by the second. It's so painfully slow he’s for sure doing it on purpose.

“And how would you do that, may I ask?” Now it’s your turn to smirk as your eyes go up back to his eyes, defying him.

His face is so close now that you can feel his breath on you. Your lips are only separated from his by bare millimeters. You’re about to tilt your chin up to connect them when someone knocks on the front door.

Mingyu drops his head as he sighs and separates from you a few inches. Your hands find their way to his chest and push him back a little to draw his attention.

“You should probably get that.” His head goes back up at your words and gives you a disappointed look.

His gaze goes down to your lips. “I don’t want to.” You smile at his reaction. You don’t really want it either, but more people are going to start showing up, so you need to get going. The person outside knocks again, and you push him one more time, a little harder this time, so he gives you space to leave his arm prison.

“Go! I’ll start putting up decorations.”

He gives up and let’s his arms go from the counter, but you don’t move. You watch his form as he turns around and walks to the door.

You were always amazed at how tall he was, his broad shoulders and strong back that somehow ended in a tiny waist. Somehow, what he was wearing today accentuated all of that.

The door opens, and you hear Mingyu welcoming whoever was outside.

The night goes as smoothly as it could have. When Seokmin arrives, everyone shouts happy birthday, and he looks genuinely surprised. But then you all find out he actually knew because Soonyoung accidentally told him yesterday. Wonderful evening.

After all the singing and shouting, someone you can’t see puts music, and the drinks start rolling in. You had no idea there was that much alcohol at the party to make like 15 people drunk, but you’re not complaining.

It's already 4am when you start feeling the effects of alcohol leave your body.

You’ve been sitting on the couch watching Wonwoo destroy everyone at Mario Kart. You don’t dare to try to play against him, so you just sat back to laugh.

Everyone eventually grows bored of the game. Some go back to their homes, but you and a few others stay to hang out.

Mingyu, on the other hand, started tidying up when people started leaving. He doesn’t mind people staying over, but he prefers cleaning now, so he doesn’t have to do it when he wakes up. He’s still listening to the conversation, though, throwing in a few comments here and there or laughing.

When he finally finishes it’s a little over 4:30 am. There’s no room on the couch, and he doesn’t want to sit on the floor, so he stands against the wall facing the group.

You’re sprawled out on the couch, resting your legs on top of Vernon’s who’s sitting at the other end. The guys are debating about… something. You stopped understanding a while ago. You just laugh when someone says something funny.

It’s when Mingyu comments about something Wonwoo said that you notice he finished with whatever he was doing, standing there in his full glory. Your eyes can’t seem to move away from him, and you don’t resist it either. His hair is now messy, and he's sweating a little bit. He catches you staring and raises his eyebrows. You shrug in response.

The chatter becomes background noise as you two play a staring game. You don’t dare move your eyes off of him, and he doesn’t either. After a few minutes, you motion a “What?” With your mouth.

He grabs his phone without breaking eye contact, but ultimately does to unlock it and starts texting someone. You realize that someone is you when his gaze is back at you, and your phone vibrates in your back pocket.

No one is paying attention to you. The guys are still debating, maybe about something else now, so you grab your phone without getting noticed. The only person who notices is Vernon because you move your legs off of him, but he doesn’t even glance at you, just re positions himself.

Kim Mingyu: so how long are you staying? [4:33 am]

You look up at Mingyu with an incredulous look, and he just motions for you to reply.

You: wow no emojis this time

Kim Mingyu: I’m being serious😔

When you look at him he’s actually making the same face as the emoji. Cute.

You: for how long am I welcomed? [4:34 am]

Kim Mingyu: you can stay however long you please

You: I was thinking I might leave when the guys leave

You: but they seem to have a lot of energy today

Kim Mingyu: I can tell them to leave [4:35 am]

You: you want me to leave that badly?

Kim Mingyu: I want you to stay.

Kim Mingyu: but I don’t want them to be here

You giggle at his response. That definitely draws attention to you because Seungkwan asks “Who’s got you giggling like that?”

“No one.” You rush to reply, and hope no one sees your eyes dart to Mingyu before adding “You don’t know him.”

The interest dies soon enough, but you know Seungkwan will ask you again later.

Your eyes find their way back to Mingyu’s to find him already looking at you, waiting for you to text him again. You raise your eyebrows at him before going back to your phone.

You: don’t be mean they’re your friends! [4:37 am]

Kim Mingyu: when I’m done with you you’ll thank me

You: done with me?🤔

Kim Mingyu: you’ll see…

Kim Mingyu: do you want to stay? [4:38 am]

You: only if you make me breakfast in the morning

You: I hear you’re a really good cook

He doesn’t reply. Instead, he starts subtly kicking everyone out, saying stuff like “hey guys it’s getting late," and “you’re all gonna be wrecked tomorrow."

Someone jokes “that’s him politely asking us to get the fuck out", and everyone laughs as they start picking up their stuff.

You also start grabbing your stuff and cleaning around you, although slower than everyone else.

It’s around 5 am. when the last few start heading out the door. You get asked how you’re leaving. You lie and say you called an Uber, and you’ll just wait here for it.

You’re back on the couch as Mingyu closes the door after the last person leaves, awkwardly sitting while waiting for him.

Butterflies show up on your stomach when Mingyu appears in the hallway, walking straight to you with a smile on his face.

The atmosphere feels awkward as he sits beside you. You want to say something, but your mind is blank. There’s really only one thing you can think about.

Mingyu opens his mouth to speak, but you get up and sit on his lap, one leg on each side of his hips.

“So what’s with all that talk earlier?” Your hands position themselves on his shoulders almost like they’re meant to be there.

Mingyu’s shocked for a second before he focuses his eyes on your lips and licks his.

“C-Can we talk about what h-happened the other day first?” He mentally kicks himself for stuttering. But his words contradict his actions. His hands are around your waist keeping you in place, and his eyes don’t leave your lips, like he’s on a trance.

“What happened was…” You grab the side of his face and get close to his ear to whisper “You got horny because of me, and I helped you.” Slowly, you go back so you can see his blushed face. “Is that right?”

But blushing doesn’t prevent Mingyu from teasing you too. “Acting like you weren’t practically begging for me huh?” His hands slowly travel from your waist to your thighs.

“Says the one who actually begged to cum.” You try your luck and grind softly against his growing bulge and he squeezes your thighs, closing his eyes lightly.

“You liked it.”

“I did, yeah." Now your hands are on his very firm chest. Mingyu sighs as you grind on him again, a little harder this time. Your faces are so close you feel his breath fanning over you, and you can’t resist your eyes when they focus on his parted lips.

When he opens his eyes again there’s only one thing on his mind, the thing that has been plaguing him since you arrived so many hours ago.

“Can I kiss you?” Mingyu says softly, almost in a whisper.

“I thought you wanted to talk?” You grind on him, hard enough to feel his already hard bulge, and you feel how your panties get ruined by your arousal.

“You’re funny.”

“I get that a lot.” Mingyu’s hands go back to your waist to make you grind on him again, setting a pace that’s not fast but hard enough to create more friction between your cores.

Electricity flows between your bodies. You wrap your arms around Mingyu’s neck, your faces barely millimeters apart. His lips are still parted, just like yours, releasing little sighs that almost make your lips barely touch.

“Please.” He pleas in a whisper, and you swear a million butterflies explode in your stomach. You can’t resist it anymore. You can't resist him.

You connect your lips with his, and Mingyu reacts instinctively. He wraps his arms around your waist, almost as if to keep you from getting away. As if you ever would.

The feeling of his lips against yours is addictive. He’s kissing you like he wants to erase any trace of anyone who has ever kissed you, making your lips his, so needy and hungry for more.

He thrusts up, making you moan in his mouth, and takes the opportunity to meet his tongue with yours, deepening the kiss and making you more addicted to him. If that’s even possible.

Mingyu’s hands start roaming your body, traveling from your waist to your thighs, and then up to your neck. Your skin burns everywhere he touches, and you want more. You want to feel him everywhere all at once.

Your hands play with the hem of his shirt. You lift it up just a little so you can touch his abs without fabric in the way. You feel him smile against your lips at your touch.

He breaks the kiss, and you chase after his lips. When you open your eyes, you find him smirking at you. His lips are swollen, and he’s stained red all around because of your lipstick. You figure you look the same. “Eager are we?"

“Yes very in fact.” You grab the hem of his shirt again and push it up. “Take this off.”

He obliges, but not before laughing softly at your eagerness. You follow his moves and also remove your tiny top. You can’t move your eyes away from his bare chest, and your hands immediately touch him, but he stops you.

“This too.” His hands sneak behind your back to unclasp your bra.

As soon as the bra is off, you push yourself against him and kiss him again. His hands are quickly on your tits, thumbs going in circles around your nipples.

“Ah! You’re making me crazy.” You manage to say almost in a moan.

The clothes in your lower bodies soon begin to annoy the both of you, and the friction is no longer enough.

Reluctantly, you get up, and now it’s his time to chase after your lips.

Mingyu understands immediately and also gets up. You remove your shorts while he gets rid of his jeans, and in no time, you're sitting on top of him again. Only your underwear in between you now.

You trace kisses down his neck, leaving marks, so that he has a reminder of you for a few days. His now fully hard dick presses against your clit just right. Your panties are so soaked they’re beginning to stain Mingyu’s boxers too.

He kisses you hard to quiet down both of your moans, as his hands sneaks down to your core and his fingers start stroking your pussy through your panties.

“You’re so wet already.”

“That’s because you’ve been teasing me for like 20 minutes.”

“Are you complaining?”

“No.” You roll your eyes playfully. “But if you don’t actually touch me in the next five seconds I’m going to lose my mind.”

He chuckles, and you think he’s about to kiss you again, but you’re starting to learn that Mingyu is a man full of surprises.

In a swift move, he turns your body around, your back now against his chest, and spreads your legs wide. One hand sneaks under your panties while the other plays with one of your boobs.

You quickly turn into a moaning mess as he starts circling around your clit and pinches your nipple. But it’s not enough. “Mingyuu.” It comes out more whiny than you’d like, but right now that’s the least of your worries.

“Tell me.” His finger slows down but also presses harder. You squirm under him, and he kisses your neck softly. “What do you want? Tell me.”

“I-I need your fingers.” Your words barely get out.

“But I am touching you” He feigns confusion. His fingers stroke from your hole to your clit, collecting your arousal and spreading it.

“Inside.” You grind on his fingers in hope of getting more friction, but he slips his hand away from you. You see his fingers glisten with arousal and feel a new wave gushing out of you. “Please.”

You don’t see, but rather feel Mingyu smile against your neck. “Whatever you want baby.”

His hand is back under your underwear in no time, playing with your hole and collecting your juices with his fingers. You grind against his hand as he slides two fingers in.

Not even your imagination could have prepared you. His thick fingers stretch you more than you ever could, and the slow but deep thrusts let you feel him in places your fingers could never reach. You can’t hold back the moans that comes out of you.

“Oh my God! Mingyu faster please!” You’re not ashamed to beg anymore.

His palm is creating friction on your clit while his other hand is still playing with your nipples, and he thrusts into you faster.

You pace your grinds to match his hand, and you’re sure this is what heaven feels like. You feel the tightness in your stomach close to snapping.

“I’m so close!” You breathe out.

Mingyu slows down his thrusts, and you’re about to complain when you feel him add a third finger. He’s stretching you deliciously, knuckles deep inside you. You can feel him everywhere.

“Cum on my fingers c’mon” He demands as he speeds up. His fingers reach the spongy spot inside you that makes you jelly and abuse it.

You’re cumming on his fingers faster than ever. Shaking on top of him as he thrusts his fingers in and out slowly, helping you ride out your orgasm.

When he finally pulls his fingers out of you, you’re still breathless. Mingyu surprises you again when he moves his slick covered fingers to his mouth and licks them clean.

You remove your panties once and for all and turn around. You feel his still hard cock under you and he winces at the friction.

“That was really hot.” You state, and his whole face turns red.

“I’m not done with you.” In one swift movement, you have your back against the couch and your head on the armrest. “I really wanna eat you out.”

And who are you to stop such a determined man? You grab his face and kiss him hard, tasting your arousal in him. “Okay.”

He starts a trail of kisses on your thigh, slowly going down until he reaches your cunt, but skips it and starts kissing your other leg. You whine in response as you grab his head and put it back on your core. You feel his breath on your bare cunt and shiver.

He looks at you in the eyes and barely licks your lower lips. You sigh at the little contact. “Stop teasing.”

His hands open up your legs and he flattens his tongue on your lips, licking in up and down motions and kissing your clit.

When he experimentally wraps his lips around your clit and sucks, you moan and instinctively close your thighs around his head, keeping him in place.

With his head now trapped in between your thighs, his tongue licks you from your clit and to your hole, tasting and savoring your arousal like it’s his last meal.

He toys with your clit and your hands find themselves in his hair again, pushing him more against your cunt. He moans when you pull at his hair, sending vibrations straight to your core and you feel a wave of arousal gushing out of you and to his mouth.

His tongue teases your hole, stroking the tip in and out lightly. You push his head into you again and his nose bumps into your clit, taking a moan out of you.

“Feels so good" You grind against his tongue as it keeps teasing your hole and his nose stimulates your clit.

Your orgasm hits you hard and fast and you’re cumming on Mingyu’s mouth in no time. He keeps his mouth on you, licking every last drop of arousal that gushes out. You have to pull at his hair to make him stop.

When he lifts his head up from you, his chin is shiny with arousal, and he’s smiling.

You waste no time and make him sit on the couch again, “Now it’s tour turn."

You kneel on the floor as you remove his boxers. Even after seeing him on video and feeling him under you, you were not prepared to see how big Mingyu actually was.

His cock springs out against his stomach, angry red and already leaking pre cum.

It barely fits in your hand, and he sighs at your touch. You give a few experimental pumps, but he stops you.

“I don’t have much longer. Do you have a condom?”

“You wanna be inside me that bad?”

“Yes.” He responds quickly. You chuckle as you grab your purse. You find the one you put while getting ready and open it.

He squirms under your hands as you put it on him. As soon as the condom is on, he grabs you and gets you on top of him again. You both sigh as your cores touch.

You grind on him, covering his cock with your juices and you both moan as he traces your neck with bites and kisses.

“Looks who’s teasing now.”

“It’s fun seeing you frustrated.” You stop your movements, and he looks at you frowning. You can’t resist his sudden cuteness and give him a peck as you resume grinding on him. His tip grazes your clit and you shiver.

“You’re making me crazy.” He breathes out, and you can’t help to chuckle.

“Can you cum like this?”

“I want to cum inside you.” His whiny response takes you by surprise.

His hands grab you by the waist and lift you up. With one hand you grab his cock and position it under your hole.

You steady yourself, putting your hands on the back of the couch, and slowly start going down.

If you thought his fingers reached places no one ever has before, then you’re sure his dick is creating more space for you to feel him. You can feel every vein dragging inside of you.

You suppress your moans by kissing him, and he sighs in your mouth when you bottom out.

You’re so full you’re having trouble breathing. He keeps you still, giving you time to adjust. Even the tiniest move makes him twitch inside of you.

“You’re so fucking big Mingyu.”

“I told you I'd make it fit.” He wraps his arms around your waist and brings you to him to kiss you. You moan, feeling him grind inside you, and he stills.

You start grinding on him slowly. You’re sighing on each other’s mouths, savoring every drag of his dick inside of you, feeling him reach deeper with every thrust.

Your hands travel to his chest and start playing with his nipples. He thrusts up when you pinch one nipple lightly, hitting exactly where you need it and making you moan louder, so you do it again.

“Yes like that Mingyu.” That encourages to start thrusting up harder and matching your pace.

One of his hands creeps down to your cunt and start playing with your sensitive clit, still wet from his spit, and the other plays with one of your nipples.

You start clenching around him, eliciting a moan out of him.

“You’re so tight around me baby.” He says almost in a moan. “I'm so close."

His thumb is still playing with your swollen clit, making you squirm and clench so hard it’s hard to keep grinding on him. You collapse on his chest and he embraces you as he fastens his moves.

He's thrusting so deep and hard. You're sure he's marking you as his. Ruining you for any other man,  spelling his name in your insides so you're forever his.

Your bodies are so close together that your clit is rubbing against his abs, a friction you've never experienced but it makes the tightness on your stomach come so close to snapping you can almost taste it.

A few hard thrusts later you’re coming undone on top of him. But his thrusts don’t stop, chasing his high while you’re clenching around him, making him go crazy. You’re staring to feel the overstimulation when you feel him twitch inside you, and his thrusts come to a stop.

You stay like that, your head on his shoulder and his arms around your waist while you regulate your breaths. Your torsos pushed together allow you to feel the beating of his heart.

Mingyu relaxes his arms from around you, and you release yourself from his embrace. You wrap your arms around his neck and look him in the eye.

“So what did you want to talk about?” He chuckles at your question.

“I’m still inside you, and you want to talk?” His reply sends shivers down your spine, and you unconsciously clench around him. He drops his head back in a sigh, and his hands find their way to your hips.

“Are you staying over?” Mingyu looks at you with puppy dog eyes, and even if you wanted to, you couldn’t say no to him. You just nod as an answer, and he smiles like you just gave him a million dollars.

He surges forward to kiss you and you both wince at the stimulation from the sudden movement. “I think we should get up.” You chuckle with his mouth still on yours.

He helps you get up, and you instantly miss the fullness of having him inside.

While you grab your clothes from the floor, he disposes of the condom and goes to his bedroom. He comes back with one of his shirts to give to you. Your stomach gives a little jump at the idea of sleeping with his t-shirt as he shows you where the bathroom is so you can clean up.

When you finish and go to Mingyu’s bedroom, he’s waiting for you already inside the covers, a smile still plastered on his face. You sit on the bed and give him a peck, but he doesn’t let you go as he deepens the kiss and hugs you close to him.

“Mingyu the sun is about to come up. We need to sleep.” You manage to say with his lips on yours, and he smiles. You separate, but neither of you make any moves to go to sleep. You lay facing each other, admiring each other’s features in silence, when he suddenly says.

“Can I confess something?” That definitely wakes you up.

“You’re not a murderer are you?” You joke, and he shakes his head as he puts one string of your hair behind your ear.

“I know we didn’t really like each other until a few days ago…" He says, now with a serious expression on his face, and you listen carefully. “and I’m not saying this just because you made me cum on the phone…” He continues very seriously but you can’t help to chuckle lightly. Mingyu removes his eyes from you a little embarrassed by what he’s about to say, “and I don’t know why you sent me that photo the other day and I might be embarrassing myself saying this but, I think I kinda like you and I don’t want this to be a one time thing.”

You stay in silence a few seconds, processing what Mingyu just said. He doesn’t dare to look at you.

“Can I confess something too?” Your question makes him look at you again. He stares at you with those puppy eyes you’re learning you’re too soft for. “I sent that picture by accident the other day.” He looks worried, fearing that what you’re saying means you’re rejecting him, so you quickly continue, “but I don’t regret it.” You see a little smile appear on his lips. “I think we were very stupid not talking all these years, we could’ve save a lot of time if you just showed me your monster cock before!” You can’t help to joke to lighten the serious mood and he laughs with you.

You grab his face and give him a little peck. “I think I might like you too, but we need to see how it goes first.”

He smile grows impossibly wider at your words. “Let me take you on a date tomorrow.”

You chuckle at his eagerness. He’s too cute for his own good. “Ok let’s go out tomorrow.”

He hugs you and brings you closer to him again, taking his time sweetly kissing you while his hands sneak under his shirt to touch your skin.

In a swift motion, Mingyu traps you under him again, your back on the mattress, and he presses against you to let you feel his already growing bulge. “Oh my god you’re insatiable.” You say as you grind against him, earning a moan out of him. “Look who’s talking.”

note: thank you so much for the support on the first part♥︎ I'm sorry the ending is kind of abrupt

[tastesousweet]

⭒ the girl with the tattoo (iii) - pt 1 pt 2

matt sturniolo x fem!oc / reader

summary : no one frustrates and confuses y/n more than matt

warnings : smoking weed, alcohol/drinking (i headcannon everyone 21+!), tension, sexually suggestive

mickey speaks : THIS IS LONG AS SHIT!!!! ngl im not obsessed w this part but u guys r the sweetest thank u for loving this story so far and for ur patience. part 4 definitely won't have as long of a wait.

THIS IS PART THREE GO READ THE FIRST TWO PARTS NEOWW

MATT hates hosting parties.

now that he and his brothers have hosted three of these "get together"s to promote the warehouse, he’s realized just how much attendees dont give a shit about respecting the space they're in. he found it to be a cool concept for sure: give out free tiny tats along with food and drinks for more exposure and networking. nick came up with it and it sounded perfectly easy way to build their brand and get to know people in LA.

except the first one was a complete mess, with chris constantly promoting the party (he mentioned it to almost everyone he talked to, encouraging them to bring friends along), frequent instagram posts dedicated to the event, and natural word of mouth the warehouse was suddenly overcrowded and trashed within the first hour of being open. matt barely got through that night without losing his temper or calling the cops to shut down his own party.

that’s not to say matt hates attending parties as severely as he hates to have his own. he’s more than willing to go out when he has a set time to leave and good enough company. he’s trained his anxiety to behave within those spaces so that he's not ruining his or anyone else's time. now it seems his anxiety only spikes when it comes to (what feels like) hundreds of people surrounding him in his space with no intentions of leaving until well into the morning. at that point he’d prefer to be at home, completely alone.

just as he does now that nick has dragged him out to a nearby liquor store to buy “goodies” for the event later today.

matt’s face carries his typical dry expression as nick stands next to him, hands resting on his hips, eyeing the various vodka bottles.

“nick, it’s alcohol not the fucking newspaper,” matt grumbles.

“i know that! i just don’t wanna choose the wrong one.” he defends.

“if they don’t like something i think we have more than enough to choose from at this point,” matt sarcastically nudges his arms that hold onto a wide selection of alcohol that nick has impetuously given him with quips of ‘okay, hold this one.’

“matt, i wouldn’t have brought you if i knew you’d be such a buzzkill, jesus.” nicks tsks.

“alright, don't say that like i was begging to come here, nick. i had no choice and-"

nick cuts him off swiftly, noticing a few girls have joined them in the aisle, “matt, move." nick guides him backwards with his hand, "you’re like, in the way.”

matt turns his head to see what exactly he was blocking, before turning back to nick and scowling, “‘m literally not in the way at all.”

“they might need to see all the options,” nick shrugs, going back to narrowing his options down while matt stands in slight annoyance, zoning out.

until he overhears the two girls call, “yeah it’s over here, y/n! come!”

and matt can’t help but turn and look (at an embarrassingly quick pace that he’d blame on his brain's pristine sound recognition and not that he wanted to see you, necessarily).

and sure enough your frame comes into view (clad in a sweatshirt and small pair of shorts), confirming that he did not mishear and you unfortunately were in fact the y/n called for. not wanting to deal with small talk, he immediately turns to nick, “the second one is best, nick. alright, let’s go.”

nick looks over to him, throwing his hands up loosely, “ohh, now you wanna be helpful whe-" he closes his mouth when he sees you over matt's shoulder, "did you know y/n's here?” his eyebrows draw together and he swiftly grabs a tall bottle of Absolut and places it in matt’s arms before walking around him (ignoring his hand’s poor attempt to hold nick back).

you’re too busy discussing which vodka tastes best with a few of your friends to notice nick walking up to you guys. you only look over once you hear a snap followed by a hushed “matt!”

you host a tender smile when you recognize the two tattooed boys, “nick? what are you doing here?” you glance from nick to matt who seems to be holding a full bar's worth of liquor while nick holds nothing but a tote bag and sunglasses he enjoys fidgeting with.

“y/n, i have a party i’m hosting tonight why would i not be here? now the real question is why are you here at 11:30 AM?” he jokes, squinting his eyes at you.

“same reason as you,” you shrug then realize you haven’t introduced your friends properly. “oh! and these are my friends; i texted you about bringing along, remi, erin, and andrea.” they each wave slightly as you gesture to them.

after an exchange of greetings and smiles (though you could tell matt’s was so phoney), nick backtracks, “okay but actually why are you here?”

“did you think i was joking? i’m getting drinks for your party!”

“i mean this in the kindest way possible: why?”

“i wasn’t gonna show up empty handed! it’s common courtesy to bring you guys something whether or not you ask.” you insist and matt fights the urge to roll his eyes.

he knows you have no mal-intent but god damn do you make yourself look so fucking pretentious.

“yeah, we’re trying to figure out what would be the best kind to bring right now,” erin chimes in.

nick immediately agrees, “oh my god, tell me about it. i was just struggling with that too!” and he turns to matt to validate, see! it’s not stupid to care about possibly buying the wrong thing!

matt just rolls his lips into his mouth, trying to give anyone a fucking clue that the conversation should be wrapping up by now.

“we’ll probably just end up getting pink whitney,” andrea reaches for the bottle on a nearby shelf.

matt can feel your eyes on him but he chooses to keep looking down at nick's ugg boots as if they’re the most interesting thing he’s seen.

you shift your eyes back to nick who’s still talking to andrea before you begin to speak, “well, i’m sure you guys are busy, you know, party planning.”

suprisingly, matt speaks up to agree with you, "yeah, you’re right actually. we are pretty busy."

nick cuts in with a shake of his head, “well, we’re actually not doing much before the party starts, honestly. we’ll probably just drop this off at the warehouse and set up a little, then go home, right matt?” nick shrugs to his brother who's eyes only widen with a look of question, “oh that's so true, matt!" he turns back to the girls with a smirk, "if you guys want you should come hang out with us now!”

matt wishes he currently had a free hand so that he could slap it over nicks mouth and drag him away before he sells his own kidney next.

"oh that's okay, we still have some stuff at home to do before we even think to get ready, but we'll be there tonight," you smile and look over to the girls who each agree.

"okay, we'll see you around then." matt tilts his head to the side encouraging nick to follow as he walks away.

"you have my insta so just dm me if you need anything. okay, bye! don’t forget swimsuits!" nick smiles and waves before rushing to catch up to matt who has already left the aisle.

౨ৎ

“i still can’t believe y/n was there, like what are the odds?!” nick giddily sighs and looks over to matt as the two walk out of the store.

“yeah, how fuckin’ weird," he murmurs, adjusting the brown bags in his hands to reach for the keys hanging from his belt loop. "small world, i guess.”

౨ৎ

“how the fuck are you so calm?” you ask in shock from behind the bat squishmellow you hold while sitting on nick’s baby pink couch, legs crossed.

“y/n, it’s like the teeniest, babiest tattoo ever,” andrea almost laughs as she takes another bite of a miniature rice krispy treat.

this “get together” at the warehouse has been a hit as far as you can tell. when you and your friends arrived it was already rowdy with people everywhere, music pounding, and bottles of alcohol scattered on the counters of a kitchenette (where you placed your own bottle of pink whitney, tied with a dainty white ribbon). you all found nick early on dancing in a crowd of people. he gave out hugs and easily convinced andrea and remi to let him tattoo them. after looking over the flash sheet nick made specifically for tonight, the girls decided to get matching cherry tattoos.

nick’s work area was so soft. he had bright hues of berry hugging his walls in the form of posters and paintings and faint creamsicle colored pillows to keep his couch company. when you all first walked in he explained how much he enjoys when clients bring in a friend so he had to make sure they had a comfy place to sit. you found nick so endearing in that since, he’s very caring and thoughtful despite his attitude at times (a far more understandable attitude than matt’s).

“it’s soo small,” nick adds, “i still think you two should get one,” he smirks looking over to you and erin huddled on the couch.

“hell no, i think i'm good for like another year," you shake your head and look over to erin while you gently run your fingers over your tattooed lower hip.

"yeah, absolutely not. i'm not even close to drunk enough to do that shit right now." she laughs.

౨ৎ

matt finds joint rolling to be the most satisfying part of smoking. the precision needed to perfectly fill, wrap, and burn makes him giddy in his own matt-kind-of-way.

after working on his last client (who wanted a somewhat abstract piece for the lowkey means of a “free tiny tats event”) and successfully sneaking through the crowd to grab a snack then sneaking back into his work area, he wanted nothing more than to get high alone.

he begins to gather his spare weed, grinder, and rolling papers from a spot tucked away in a drawer. he stops by his desk to turn his speaker back on, playing hushed kendrick lamar thorughout the space.

he taps his fingers along to the beat before sitting in a chair and displaying the items in front of him. he begins to grind the weed while humming, only to be interrupted fairly quickly.

"matttt!" chris peeks his grinning face through the curtain before taking it upon himself to walk in, "what are you doin' all alone in here?" matt pauses his movements with a sigh.

"no way you were rolling up and not planning to share? what the fuck?" chris pries in jest, rolling a chair over to sit in front of matt.

"dude, 'm so over this fuckin' party. i was planning to just smoke this and go nap on nick's couch or something." matt explains as he carefully lays the weed in the paper.

"you were barely even out there! got all your clients to text you whenever they got here." chris mumbles a scoff. "that is not the fuckin' point of this by the way, supposed to be meeting new people." chris rolls his eyes leaning himself so far into the chair that his back has practically met the seat.

"at least i'm doing something, you've only given like a tat or two all night," matt mumbles, slowly filling the white paper with weed.

because chris knows he's right he deflects the conversation to the reason he even came searching for matt in the first place. he clears his throat, playing with his fingers, "nick wants to take the girls up to the hot tub."

"thought we weren't allowing randoms up there anymore?" matt smirks at the memory of nick just hours before lecturing the both of them on what ground rules needed to be set so people don't demolish their shop for the fourth time now.

"obviously if they're with nick they're not just randoms." chris shakes his head, "pretty sure it's y/n and some friends she brought along. you remember that girl, right? she was-"

matt stops sealing the blunt to respond, "uh huh, i remember her."

chris lets out a breath, causing matt to finally look up and make eye contact with his brother (after spending their entire conversation too focused on rolling) in surprise at his pause in speaking.

"yeah, she's cool." chris yawns.

"i guess." matt says while finishing off the joint.

matt then lifts his hand up to give chris a view of his rolled joint. "stellar." chris smiles and matt hands it him, "swear you have a gift for this shit or somethin'." chris holds it in different angles near his face.

matt just shrugs and reaches for the tiny red lighter in his back pocket, "light that bitch up," he encourages chris.

"wait, no, let's save it for hot-tubbing."

"no? let's not? i didn't roll it for anyone but myself, let alone a group of barbies."

"be nice, matt."

"give me it, chris," matt rolls his eyes and signals with his fingers for chris to hand it over. “also who says i’m joining you guys in there?”

chris hands the joint back over to matt who’s immediately putting it in his mouth and bringing it towards the lighter’s flame, “nick wants the both of us up there, he thinks it’ll be fun.”

matt’s words come out quieter now that he’s speaking with smoke held in his lungs, “is he shit faced?” matt exhales the smoke as he speaks, “you know he thinks anything is ‘fun’ when he’s drunk.”

he takes another hit while chris explains, “no he’s actually really fuckin’ coherent, hasn’t had anything compared to me.” he smirks knowingly.

“not too much of this for you then,” matt exhales and passes the blunt over to chris. “so who’s gonna be hosting this party if we’re all on the roof?” matt asks squinting at him while playing with the soft edge of his graphic tee shirt.

chris’ face hides behind the smoke he releases, “we have dontae and claire working tonight too, they know how to deal with shit. i’m not too worried.”

“cool, so nick has contradicted himself twice already tonight, what happened to ‘one of us three should always be keeping an eye out’?” matt questions.

chris shakes his head, handing matt the smoked down joint, “literally how am i supposed to know why that kid thinks the way he does?”

matt licks his lips with a smile at his brothers comment then goes to hit the blunt once more.

“but i do know you need trunks on asap, brother.” chris lifts himself up, feeling a little looser now that he’s quite faded, and begins to dig through matt’s backpack in the corner of the room.

“why the fuck are my trunks just casually in my bag?”

“i put ‘em in there knowing you wouldn’t listen when we told you to pack them.”

“because i’m never getting in the pool at a party, that sounds terrible.”

“you think everything sounds terrible,” chris rolls his eyes throwing the plain black swimming trunks at matt’s chest.

౨ৎ

“‘kay so the game is just called, “i dare you…” but we’re gonna play it like drink or dare,” chris explains before taking another sip of his pepsi (he’s attempting to ‘sober up’ before playing a drinking game). “assuming the crowd knows what drink or dare is..?” chris looks around to everyone to confirm. there’s quite a lot of people in the spacious hot tub: you and your friends, the triplets, asha, and two of the triplets’ friends nathan and cameron.

when everyone nods in understanding chris explains something about the order to follow and how to discard any used cards, but you only loosely pay attention. instead, your eyes keep an unfaltering stare on matt who sits across from you with the shadows of his face highlighted light blue from the water below and a warm amber from the outdoor lighting above.

he wears his hair messy and his signature silver chain that reflects in the water harshly. you find yourself focusing on his tattooed hands (large in proportion to the joint he’s just finished rolling), and his pink tongue that has slipped out a number of times to lick at the joint and secure its shape.

he’s so into his own task he hasn’t even acknowledged your presence really. somehow that bothers you and attracts you to him at the same time. his face is so neutral as well, it’s not easy to find matt without a resting bitch face and an foul mood to match.

you feel andrea’s hand guide up your back, carrying water in its trail. you still continue in your curious trance until she leans down to your ear, “don’t start drooling now.”

you immediately look up towards her (as she’s sat on the ledge of the hot tub, cautious of her new arm tattoo). she barks out a laugh and you try not to laugh as well, punching the side of her leg instead.

“what did i miss? what are we giggling aboutt?!” nick excitedly asks as he climbs into the hot tub and sits in the empty spot to the left of you. you turn and greet him with a smile and he immediately hands you one of the many beer bottles he holds, “here, take one, pass it down.”

“oh it was nothing, thank you.” you reply when handed the final bottle.

nick nods before swatting at chris who still stands in the middle of the hot tub, “kid, you can sit down now, i think we all got it.”

chris looks over to nick, “you go first then, nick. i’ll queue up a few songs.” he shifts a floaty that holds a set of cards in it towards nick before taking a seat next to erin (you can overhear him introducing himself even though your attention is on nick as he draws).

“who’s the bright one who chose a game with cards to be done in water?” nick jokes finally looking at the card.

“i’m sure you can guess,” asha laughs next to him.

you watch as nick’s face welcomes a large grin upon reading his dare. “okay…i’m reading this out loud, right?”

“i thought ‘we all got it’?” chris jokes and watches nick deadpan, “yes, nick just say it.”

“this one’s easy, ‘i dare you to make one of the group members crack a smile in less than a minute.’” nick adjusts himself to face nathan, “nate look at me.”

“oh come on nick, nate laughs at everything when he’s drunk.” matt talks despite his lips closing over the joint he’s just about to light.

“i don’t!” nate says before looking over to cameron, who elbows his side, making nathan giggle and cover his face. “no! for real, try me nick.” he adjusts his expression to be serious but just as nick opens his mouth to speak nathan explodes in sudden laughter causing the rest of the group to laugh as well.

even matt laughs into his arm as he passes the joint to remi, next to him.

౨ৎ

as the group continued playing the dares leveled in dirty extremity. asha nibbled on cameron’s ear like a hamster, nathan texted a friend asking to have a threesome, cameron licked sugar off of andrea (who very much enjoyed it), until finally it was matt’s turn.

matt’s been far more sociable and charismatic this entire time spent in the hot tub than you’ve seen him before. but you can’t tell if it’s the weed and alcohol or even just the fact that he’s surrounded by a group with some of his close friends that’s bringing this out of him. you’re shocked the only nagging he’s done was to break up a small argument between his brothers and of course make fun of you, mouthing “you scared?” after you denied hitting the joint for a second time. you mouthed back “no” and rolled your eyes at him but his playful smirk never left.

matt hangs his head and stifles laughter after reading his card, “i dare you to bend over backwards and let the rest of the group spank you, chose who’s best.”

“oh my god!” chris’ laugh is higher in pitch now that he’s extremely high.

“guys i really don’t wanna,” he sighs.

“matt, don’t be lame! you’ll be the first one who’s drinking,” asha encourages.

“fuck this game,” he mumbles under his breath before adjusting himself to lean over the hot tub, everyone laughing at the sight. it was fun to see matt so unserious for once.

after taking turns to hit matt’s ass, he decided the fourth person’s was the best, per his dare’s request, and nathan celebrates with a throw of his hands in the air.

remi then performs a trust fall with the person she trusts least in the group, cameron (who she told there was no hard feelings since they’d only met today), making it now erin’s turn.

she blushes at her card before reading aloud, “i dare you to give a lap dance to the hottest person in the group.” she bites her lip in embarrassment but nonetheless leans over to chris and requests a song in his ear.

chris smiles and taps his phone as erin adjust herself to standing. “this is gonna be hard to do in water,” she messes with her hair.

“you’ll be fine!” you encourage with a smile.

“alright, you ready?” chris looks up to erin and she nods in response.

body party by ciara begins to play sensually through the nearby speaker gaining a few “oouuu”s from the group.

what you don’t expect is for erin to lean herself in front of matt. and matt definitely doesn’t expect this either, but he’s not too mad about it.

“oh shitttt,” cameron grins, he and nathan occupied in their own awkward-laughing fit while watching with wide eyes.

she moves slowly and hovers matt in a straddling position to “grind” on him. you take a heavy sip of your drink while watching in an attempt to hide your odd feeling about this. it was like watching a car crash. you watch as matt’s eyes gaze up and down her body, not daring to touch her but unashamed of his attraction.

asha laughs and whistles in support when erin turns around to give matt a view of her ass. nick dramatically ducks behind you yelling, “i actually can’t watch this! oh my god!”

you laugh and to mess with him whisper, “don't worry, it’s over now.”

nick looks back and immediately goes back to covering his eyes and laughing with you, “you bitch!”

you look back to matt who tilts his head back with wide eyes and lips puffing out in humor. and finally, after it feels like the two have dry humped for hours, erin stands back up and bows. matt claps with a wide smile, everyone else joining in.

when erin sits down you look up to andrea who just stifles a laugh with a sip of her drink. “well how the fuck am i gonna top that shit?!” chris exclaims while grabbing a card.

“real question is how the fuck will matt recover from that?” you joke causing matt to look over to you.

“oh don’t worry about me, sweetheart. i’m sure i’ll recover fine. chris,” he lifts his head gesturing for chris to begin his dare.

your tongue travels along your teeth to stop yourself from ruining a good time with your confusing feelings.

“i dare you to give a hickey to the person to your left.” chris bites his bottom lip and blinks slowly before looking over to andrea who just smiles and playfully flutters her fingers at him.

“you’re cool with this right, ‘m not tryna make you uncomfortable or any-”

“chris, shh.” andrea says.

“'kay, where do you want it?” he smiles.

“let’s make this fun,” she adjusts her bikini top and presses her manicured fingers along her right breast, “right here.”

nick is extra dramatic when it comes to watching chris suck harshly on his new friend’s tit, “okay, why the fuck did we choose this game?!” he turns away.

when chris is finished andrea shows it off to the group as proof and pushes chris’ cocky face away with a laugh, “nice job, stupid.”

afterwards, andrea gets a dare to expose her search history with the group, which she does without a problem.

it’s finally your turn to pick a card. “i dare you to lick whipped cream off a person of your choice.”

“oouu who’s it gonna beee?” nick nudges into your side.

you look around the hot tub, wanting to pick someone unpredictable, “ashaaa, you haven’t had much to do yet?” you look over to the girl who now has wide eyes and a growing smile.

“okay, yeah let’s do it,” she shrugs. “nate could you go get whipped cream, please?”

once nathan’s back you move closer to asha and decide to put whipped cream on her shoulder. “it tickles,” she giggles when you lick the entire dollop off of her easily.

you both laugh and you lick your lips as you head back to your seat.

౨ৎ

after another round it’s finally matt’s turn again, he draws a card that reads: give a kiss anywhere, on the person you’d “take home to mama.”

matt slowly stands and rubs his chin with a devious smile. “ummm,” he draws out, giving multiple looks at everyone before he walks over and hovers over you. you’re shocked by your body’s ease when his wet hand lifts to hold your face and his lips connect to yours. the kiss isn’t sloppy, but rather needy. you were just getting used to the taste of the bitter beer he’d just been drinking when he pulls away and steps back, unfazed.

you blink and wipe your fingers around your lips as matt wipes a hand over his eyes while laughing to himself.

“mom, would love y/n,” chris adds, calling back to the initial dare that led to that stomach turning kiss.

“'course she would, she’s a fucking saint.” matt sighs.

you squint your eyes and tilt your head, “i wouldn’t say that…”

“yeah, shit, my bad.” matt spreads his legs across from you, “forgot you have that little tattoo. i’m sure you’re not such a good girl anymore.”

you’re fucking annoyed now. you hate that he thinks you're inferior to him in any way. “hey where’s that ashtray, chris?” you ask, adjusting your seated position.

“uh, here,” he reaches behind him and places it on the same floaty as the cards, along with the lighter.

“you guys are cool to keep going,” you say and take the abandoned joint in your hand to relight it.

matt watches in spiteful anticipation.

“take it slow, and hold it” andrea explains to you in a whisper, knowing you’d never smoked in your life.

erin begins her dare to prank call a customer service line and dirty talk them when you take a hit of the joint.

matt eyes never leave your bothered figure as you inhale and cause the tip of the joint to light a bright red. he can tell you’re trying to prove a point which makes it more amusing to him when your eyes begin to water after you shakily exhale and attempt to hold back a cough.

“don’t hurt yourself.” matt quips under his breath.

౨ৎ

the group hadn’t realized just how long they’d been in the hot tub nor how drunk they all are until they struggled to get out and back to the main floor of the warehouse.

though, lots of giggles and piggyback rides helped them all stay together as they traveled back, cold and still damp. all partygoers were gone at that point, leaving the warehouse empty yet a mess.

nick (being the self-proclaimed good host he is) led the mass of drunk people to the bathrooms and brought extra graphic tee shirts and sweatpants to change into from the many boxes of merch sold in their tattoo shop. the boys had insisted that everyone just sleep at the warehouse due to their abundance of couches and chairs and their fear in sending anyone home in an uber at close to 3 AM.

matt is throwing pieces of trash in a large black trash bag when you step out from the bathroom near the colorful kitchenette of the warehouse.

he glances up when you approach slowly, feeling yourself sobered up quite a bit after peeing and washing your face.

“hey,” his voice is rough in tiredness.

“hey, do you have any water over here?” you ask politely, your lips taste salty when you lick over them.

“in the fridge,” he replies, crumbling wrappers and adding to his bag.

you notice how red and puffy his eyes truly are now that you’re this close to him and in better lighting. you walk past him to get to the fridge, almost completely empty after a long-lasting and full party.

“are you sleeping any time soon?” you ask, opening the water bottle.

“i don’t know.”

“i can always help you clean this if you need me to.”

“‘m good.” he analyzes a glass bottle to decide whether it’s worth keeping.

you nod your head, “cool.”

“you should probably sleep.” matt suggests looking over to you.

“i think i can decide that for myself, thanks.” you drink more of your water.

“you’re right i can only suggest. i’m suggesting you to go to sleep. and if you do stay up i'd suggest you don’t spend your time talking to me.”

you finish off your water and move closer to matt, placing it in the bag. “you truly know how to piss a girl off.”

“it’s my specialty.” he whispers and looks over your face now that you’re so close.

he’s so fucking hot that it genuinely upsets you at this point. you just back up and turn to go find the couch andrea’s decided to sleep on.

“goodnight, sunshine.” he calls after you, going back to his cleaning.

you're not too far away when you hear the bathroom door open and once again matt is greeting someone, only when you look over your shoulder you see erin approaching and matt leaning on the island counter with a smile.

you turn the corner with irritation. and you find yourself in the unfortunate position of having a problematic crush on matt while wanting nothing to do with him at all.

꩜⋆ ˚｡⋆🎱˚

[ohmygraves]

Hello, this is my first time jump into someone's ask box. May i have a request Gaz or any TF141 men you think would fit with reader who has big bruises on their body (they got it from mission or simply after training) but reader choose to hide it and tend the bruises by them selves. The man found this out by accident when they're changing clothes or whatever scenario you would put up. It's a bit angst but with a lot of comfort afterwards. You may ignore this if you feel uncomfortable with this trope..

Sincerely

Anon from Indonesia UTC+8

hello anon, thank you so much for requesting! i feel like they all would be concerned if the reader got hurt but refused to go get it checked with the medics (⁠ ⁠･ั⁠﹏⁠･ั⁠) so i will try to write some bits for all of them 💖 i hope you like it, sorry it took so long!

you got hurt on the last mission you went to with gaz.

you, captain price, and the sergeant were on the comms line together. you're in charge of backing up kyle when he infiltrates the building, and was talking with laswell and price. some dumb jokes, catching up with the station chief, stuff like that. the mission had been slow, and you're getting bored staying out there alone glued to the scope.

looking back, you probably shouldn't have joined in on the banter. you completely missed an enemy ambushing you from behind, and had lost communications for a few minutes as you got slammed against a huge boulder, tossed around by the man who attacked you. it was a miracle you got back in one piece, only bruised and some small cuts after the scuffle. you were lucky, so lucky that you're not sure if this were to happen again, you'd probably not going to be able to return at all.

you noticed how kyle, price and laswell was worried during your disappearance from the comms line, especially since kyle kept calling for you a few times and you wouldn't answer. after you shot the man down, you brushed off your clothes and returned to your post, apologizing to everyone and explaining what had happened. you assured everything is fine, and that you're okay and can still keep going. you didn't bleed out or anything.

oh, how wrong you were.

as you sat on the exfil vehicle together with price and gaz, you're starting to feel sore. the adrenaline coursing through your veins must've dulled the pain earlier, and now that it's gone down, you're feeling the pain.

honestly, pain might be an understatement, because you feel like you just got hit by a car.

god, your body hurts. every inch of your body feels like it's screaming for mercy. you're sure that bruises are forming somewhere under your clothes, but you honestly can't be bothered to even go to the medic for this. not when kyle is bleeding beside you and price is stressed because the target escaped.

it's fine, you can deal with it later. frozen peas and some painkillers will do the job.

you didn't realize that someone did notice how you're nearly limping around to go catch up with price for a debriefing...

john price

he'd noticed that you were hurt after you returned his calls on the comms, just after you finished shooting the guy who messed you up on the field. although, he was too occupied to even press you more about it, deciding to trust you that everything is fine on your end. thankfully, you did returned to the helo in one piece, which eases his mind.

still, he couldn't help but notice how off you're walking to his office, wincing slightly as you take each step. something must've happened back then when you were cut off from comms, and he needs to know. he quickly finished debriefing and dismissed everyone else, but told you to stay behind.

you feel your bones creak every time you move, even if that doesn't seem physically possible.

"are you sure you're okay?" price asked you, crossing his arms over his chest as he examined you top to bottom, "you're limping quite awfully, doll."

"'m fine, captain... gonna go check on kyle..." you replied curtly, not wanting him to make a big deal out of it. it's just a couple of bruises, nothing bad surely.

"get it checked with the medics. and i'll know if you don't." he sighed, "i know you think you can fix it yourself, but you should get it checked either way. you may be able to fix some scrapes, but you'll need to see if you broke any ribs or not."

"but—"

"it's an order, soldier," price snapped, "no ifs or buts."

you didn't say anything, simply nodding and turned back to leave his office. you might actually do it, given how sore your body feels right now. you didn't hear that price approached you, holding your hand over the doorknob. his eyes looked closer to examine you, his free hand moving to caress your cheek, his thumb wiping off the dirt on your face.

"take care of yourself, love. please."

"i'll try, captain..."

"good. that's all i asked."

simon "ghost" riley

you decided that you want to take a shower before going to see kyle at the infirmary.

he was bleeding a lot, it might take a while to see him anyway. and you were rolling around on mud that whole mission, you feel like you were covered in dirt from head to toe. gross.

the communal shower is just a few meters away anyway.

you took a small detour to your room to grab a change of clothes, thankful that you prepared it in advance. grabbing a cargo pants and a pair of clean t-shirt, you walked into the communal shower at the base, taking off your dirty clothes and setting it aside. it'll be cleaner if you wash them yourself.

changing was hard, your arms feel like it's so sore that it's about to fall off, and not to mention you can't even move freely. maybe price was right, you broke a rib because your chest is hurting slightly when you try to pull your dirty t-shirt over your head.

"what the hell happened t'ya?"

a rough voice called out to you as you heard someone stepped closer. you glanced to see who it was as you struggled to take off your clothes, seeing the familiar mask over the face and a bare, scarred chest. oh, it's just ghost.

"ya looked like a bruised apple."

you laughed, knowing how much your body hurts right now, you kind of feel like one too.

"got thrown around during the mission with gaz and the captain," you replied, trying to wrestle your t-shirt out over your head still as you wince slightly, "just... god, no big deal, really... gaz got shot..."

ghost hummed, nodding slightly as he sees you struggling to undress. "need help?" he asked, eyeing your bruises under the t-shirt peeking out while you try to peel off the fabric off of your body.

"please do, i'm losing my mind..."

"guess someone needs t'see medic after this..."

you rolled your eyes as ghost yanked the shirt off of your body in one swoop, making you groan and hiss at the sharp pain you felt. clearly he wasn't gentle enough.

"sorry," ghost apologized. you didn't really mind, brushing it off as you kicked off your boots and pants down, throwing it somewhere in the room.

"i'll live... thanks, ghost."

he nodded, giving your head a small pat as he turned around to his own locker, his fingers messing your hair up. "don't act tough, go see the medic after this."

you didn't want to tell him that you liked that he patted you on the head, so you grumbled up a response, pouting. "yeah, yeah... you're such a worrywart."

"i mean it. those bruises are messed up."

"i know, i know... geez."

ghost shook his head as he patted your head again, a little more roughly this time, messing your hair as he got dressed and left the communal shower.

john "soap" mactavish

the moment the water hits you, you couldn't help but groan out in pain. you weren't expecting hot water or anything, but at least not something that would literally freeze your arse up. you weren't sure if cold water is better since you're far too distracted from the pain by how cold your fingertips are.

you wondered if there's any way you could get some hot water, most of the time it's always broken.

your fingers started messing with the dial, fumbling as you tried to dodge the cold water hitting those sore spots on your body.

"jesus wit happened to ye, bonnie?"

you turned around seeing soap in his naked glory, somehow. having seen everyone naked at this point, you didn't care enough to mention it. it's the shower anyway.

"got smacked across the face by the enemy earlier on mission."

"yer like a bruised pear."

you shrugged it off, "lt said apple earlier, but same difference i suppose."

he chuckled, looking at what you were doing. he didn't say anything, simply moving to adjust the water for you. after fiddling for a while, he managed to find a good enough temperature that you could enjoy.

"need help, bonnie?"

"'m good, soap. you should go see gaz."

he didn't fight you, simply giving you some head pats, chuckling when he sees your pouting face. sometimes you feel like he's treating you like a kid or like a younger sibling... well, until he gave your butt a squeeze anyway.

"ow! soap!" you yelped in pain, knowing that a bruise has formed there too. soap laughed, giving it a small pat as he teased you again.

"careful, bonnie. can't get our star all bruised now~"

you rolled your eyes, sticking your tongue at him as he walked out of the communal shower.

kyle "gaz" garrick

after taking about an hour on your "quick shower", you get changed and decide to go see gaz in medbay. knowing that he got shot made you feel awful, so you just want to see if he's okay. you're sure he's fine, but he's going to keep bitching about it for weeks.

you made your way to the medbay, seeing if you could visit kyle. he was on the bed, pouting, so you decided to walk in and sit by his bedside.

"hey, you okay?" you asked him, seeing how he's wrapped in bandages.

"have a few extra holes on me, but i'd say i'm feeling better... you?" gaz let out a sigh as he looked at you, noticing the way you sit uncomfortably on the chair because of your bruises.

"i'll live."

"they got you too, huh?" gaz sighed, looking disappointed at you, "i'll call the medics."

you didn't want to bother him, so you tried to stop him.

"what? you're hurt. just because it's bruises doesn't mean that you can just brush it off." gaz shakes his head, taking your hand in his. "i don't like seeing you get hurt."

that made you blush, your heart thumping as kyle called for the medics to check on you too. you could feel his hand on yours, thumbs caressing the back of your hand as medics approached you.

[shiningmystic]

A peek into your soul PAC

If you don’t believe in souls then this isn’t for you!

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You may not know yourself as well as you think; Your soul is its own thing, separate from your ego and higher self but is apart of the whole that is you and your energy. It's also only a peek into it so don't be too hung up on the minor details, just have fun! If it doesn’t resonate sorry man! Maybe next reading :)

If you see me describing you, then your pretty aligned with your soul!

How to choose a pile: Pick your favorite superpower and head down to your paragraph. You can choose a second one too if you’re a multi powered superhero 😉

。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。°。° support me on my journey: [Ko-fi]・❥・[Tip me] commissions are open and limited! $6 readings sent through email. Channeled songs: My Love Mine All Mine by Mitski

Flight ➳

Channeled colors: Blue, white, grey

You're a creator at heart, a fool on his journey of awakening. I see hard work isn't for you or your soul. you're a slow mover, a trendsetter someone that holds an explorer's heart and the imagination of a child. you seek freedom in all its forms and a person who enjoys the finer things in life. you take your time and like to do what you want; you're not stubborn but may enjoy sitting around at times when things are going to slow and get boring. Your soul is actually full of surprises, and it advises you to stand up and work on the vision you want even if it may take a while; just feed your soul along the journey like going on adventures and you will be fine. Always keep building what makes your heart dance. Your soul sees through a lot of the ‘fake’ in reality, you do not lie to yourself if you can help it. A wisdom permeates from your soul, an old knowledge ready to be released through you, never be ashamed of the chaos for we are made by it. A beautiful wild mess I hear, and someone is laughing in my ears. You bring joy, speak your truth, wisdom flows out.

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Super strength ★

Channeled colors: the rainbow, yellow, orange and red

You have been wronged and your soul remembers; it fires up whenever something unjust plays out in front of you. Your soul is the flame, a fire that burns so bright that you are unavoidable especially in the darkness where you shout to the heavens how things should be different. Your soul desires unpredictability and a monotonous life is the complete opposite of what your soul seeks. Do you deserve a good life? it depends on you and no one else. you're the fighter, the warrior, you know you have the power you just need a direction to point it in. You're not afraid to be the thief and conniving villain if someone forces you in that position and your soul reminds you of this, that you hold destruction at your fingertips and also creation. Follow the sight of the unjust and see where your flame takes you. Your love is magical and to powerful that it even hurts you sometimes; you're explosive, a bloom of a different hue; never water it down to fit into the background. Your soul owns the world, do the same.

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Duplication ❋ ❋

Channeled colors: Bronze, blue, and black

Your soul is liquid fire, molten lava descending from a volcano. Your soul says you know where you're going, stop looking so far ahead that your brilliant mind clouds what is destined. I see a wise old old soul, something I can't even fully understand, but you do, you know it deep in your gut. your soul looks upon you like a child, but a child they feel conflicted by, as if the lessons from the past keep repeating, and the pain follows along. your soul absorbs it all but needs to be channeled properly out through physical action like exercise. Your eyes are powerful, have you heard your eyes are windows to the soul? well your soul is intimidating yet also very loving when given the chance, the energies are so flip flop it makes me believe you might not believe this. Psychic abilities might plague this pile, to the souls who understand take your time and see your tears are not unreasonable but come from a deep knowing, for your deep soul harbors many things for the people its loved and who it will love. Many witches will pick this pile and even if you aren't, you hold a dark kind of magic; not the one on T.V but magic that goes back to instinct, intuition true witchcraft type shit. A compass inside is leading you, but it doesn't mean it's always straight line and it may lead you somewhere unexpected; just know you aren't in the wrong place. Your soul knows you shouldn't rely on your foresight to know what will happen but your will to learn more about the world. your fear may hold you back, but fear isn't the one living with the consequences, you do; so, let your soul exist in the sound of music, the colors of the sky and the love in your heart.

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Telepathy ⚜

Channeled colors: pink, purple and blue

Your soul sings a melody that is irresistible, seekers of your love or presence will want a taste of your delicious soul. It may sound disturbing, but you feed the sick and lonely, the helpless and the needy. even if you may not like it your soul exists to radiate acceptance and healing, you may even be a sexual healer but that does not apply to everyone because it not even that exactly. If you enjoy music or like to sing or play an instrument, your soul expresses itself through it best; whatever helps you express do it more. Your soul is childish if you aren't, it is. it holds onto the precious things that you held dearly when you were young. your soul leaves room for everyone it can but this can be overwhelming. souls are learning along with us, accept what may be and walk along knowing you know what you need. I feel an excitement for the world, again your soul is young or has a beautiful and youthful understanding of reality that you may not even grasp yet. an innocence that wants to be shared. You are beautiful your soul says, you make me sing louder when you know it. Don't let the song lead you to far away from yourself but let it show you how amazing you are and to grow from there.

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Healing Factor ❤

Channeled colors: pink, red, yellow

Uh, I'm honored to come in contact with such a powerful soul. Your soul is stuck in the ‘in between’, a place of life and the beyond. It doesn't hate being there though, but you may feel it in different ways. I believe the dream walkers have picked this pile; you guys have some vivid dreams huh? Even if you don’t, your heavy sleepers. your soul is so connected to both sides so when you sleep it does its own thing and just dips into other realities. this may sound cool but I think many people here have physical ailments or issues that it's contributing too (not the cause but it’s contributing, just to emphasis). some of you have heavy mental issues that do not have to stem from trauma but born with it, even if you have been through something your soul carries a wound from your ancestors. i see your soul seeking something, going back ‘home’ and coming back to your body, trying to help you heal or find something to help. Your soul is happy when exploring and going back to ‘home’ its like going back to your roots so maybe that’s a message for some good back to your roots. There is a call from your soul to go back to reality as well and face something with you whatever it may be and accept what is; your strength, your beauty and that fear will not rule here, you’re not alone. you already know a lot about your soul (that’s what I’m hearing) so your personality is probably very aligned with your soul's energy. nice your souls are pretty chill and being the healing pile the vibes do add up.

Decks used: The Wild Unknown Archetypes by, Kim Krans, and The Original Rider Waite Tarot deck

[deesseshesca]

What truth must I accept to move on ?

What again ? No ! No ! No ! You swore it will be the last time…

Good night pretty souls, today we are checking on your situation. Why did it needed to happen ? How can you alchemise it ? 

Choose the image that’s speak to you and allow yourself to soak ONLY what’s reasoning with YOUR SITUATION 

Rules and Disclaimer 

I am the type of tarot reader to say as it is. Nothing is sugar coated but everything is sent with good intention. If you are not ready to face some truth, you should vagabond somewhere else. 

MINOR DON'T INTERACT WITH THIS POST 

MINOR DON’T READ THIS POST 

CHOOSE AN IMAGE 

PILE 1 

Ace pentacles, ace wands (reverse), page swords (reverse), chariot, 999

Good night to my type A people, welcome to your reading. So lately you have concocted the most perfect budgeting plan to attend to your goals in the most efficient and successful way. I am also getting that you brought cute little things to ensure to motivate you throughout this saving journey. You know you're going to need to make some sacrifice on the way. Which can be frustrating in summer, especially when you see everyone around you spending a bag. I want to congratulate you for the healthy mindset you have regarding your money. Most of you are saving for your first car or first apartment. Someother to fund a change of career, thinking of starting nursing school or just to survive college. While others are trying to start a side hustle like becoming a lash tech or a nail tech. While harboring this tunnel vision mindset, I'm getting that people around you are not very supportive. Going as far as mocking you. But the truth you must accept: the journey towards your goal will never go smoothly. Pile 2, you are the type to plan for hours down to the very second. Anticipating everything that can go right or wrong. And when it does not go your way, you say ‘’fuck it. It ain’t even  worth it anyway. If it was really meant to be it will be easy’’ BULLSHIT ! You are the problem. You are to focus by the end of the journey, that you forget that you have to walk through the journey. Not just fly to it. Sometimes on your path something might stings or feet might hurt. The real issue is that you are missing stamina and only want to feel good. Good job, you have your priorities straight. But girl, you ain't just saving for some Mcdonal meal or a new lip gloss. You want a car, a house, a new career. Since the goal is bigger it requires more sacrifice. Letting go now, wil be like taking a big ‘’L’’.Head up, discipline over motivation. Building muscle is hard and it takes time just like a habit. Plus you have to stop thinking that life is happening to you. Babygirl, everyone got issues, you are not the only. Imma touch your heart when I said this, you are not the strongest soldier, so pick it up and keep it pushing. Because this victim mentality is making you act sour with people around you. I’m afraid to announce it to you, but you are the bad energy, you are the negative vibes rn. Hold on, before you click off this reading after this beautiful drag (you must admit…) is you have too much potential. And is pissing me off that you are allowing it to slip away from your hands. You are capable of standing strong on your boundaries and to create an amazing plan. That’s some qualities one will take a lifetime to master and you are born with it. Don’t become forceful, be the amazing leader you are meant to be. Don’t give up ! You will be rewarded in your finances/career. Finish what you started. The worst is that you know all that already. What’s funny is that you keep saying you don’t care, but your mind screams for it, your soul keeps reminding you that it wants it and your pinterest ain’t giving up on the vision yet.  Do do everyone a favor and go get it.  Do a deep life clean so you can make room for some new energy. Reflect on your life choices.

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Super shy -Newjeans

PILE 2 

Death (reverse) , ace cups, magician (reverse), emperor

You were meant to read this. Now ! Right now is giving the biggest scam in history just like what’s happening in your life. I’m hearing the tiktok that goes ‘’ Ok now, where’s the camera now. I must be getting prank now’’. The reality…you don’t want to move on.  You yearn for a past that ain’t never coming back. You also don’t want to deal with anything that can trigger you. But you can’t claim you heal, if you have the same reaction when the universe sends you variation of the same problem. And isolating ain’t going to help your case. But the universe finally got the message. Lucky you, you are getting to send a friend. Someone that will bring the sun back into your life. That person will trigger you (in a good and necessary way ) and she will not allow you to sabotage the way of y’all friendship. I’m understanding : poor timing, don’t have resources, cocky, delulu, personality disorder, force = I think you are going to have a Karen moment in a shop close to your house. She is going to trigger a crisis in you. Instead of looking at you like you are crazy, like most people do. That person will play along. Y’all going to be 2 crazy bitches in the store. And instead of feeling cornered, you will weirdly feel valited because usually when you act out people call you crazy. You just found another crazy person. Everytime will go back into the store, she will always be there. You will try to avoid her , but nah she will jockly always go to you. That person will grow on you. I’m feeling the opposite aesthetic. I see her being a bimbo and loving it and you our little emo angel. Honestly, I fell in love with her energy while channeling her. I was trying so hard to stay serious but nah, I ended up having a dance break. How can u notlove her, she’s a sweetheart. Girl, you might THINK, that you ain’t doing enough. But your spirit guard, the universe, anyone that allows themself to see more than what you project and I can assure that you are on top of your game. Especially after everything you went through and put up with. Keep your focus and discipline. You got this babe ! I’m proud of you ! When you are ready, let go of the version of you that no longer serves you. You don’t need to pay the price of your mistakes. 

I’m hearing: ‘’ You deserve this friendship’’ 

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POP - NAYEON

PILE 3 

Knight swords, ace pentacles (reversed), seven cups, High priestess, 1313 

Everything was fine until it wasn’t. When did it all go so wrong? It happened so unexpectedly. The only thing left standing is your BFF/sister. You never thought life would take u off overnight. I’m hearing you failed some important exams or your parents are very good but they badly gambled the finances and you have to pay the price for it. The truth is … it is always in front of your face. It’s been a while that you have been seeing and feeling that your studying routine is not working for you. But prefer to pretend that is everything else but what’s ahead of you. You always had a feeling that your parents were awful with money but did not dare to try to know how badly. Is not too late…yet. For a while now you pretend to be happy. Thinking that the more you fake it, you will finally feel it. Now you are down bad emotionally. You never thought you would ever be there. Babe is the the time to give in into distraction. Now you need to pull the rag under your feet and face your fears. You want to know what happiness is really about. You know it is time to do some deep healing. To question your self belief. From the silliest question to the most disturbing. ‘’Is my fav color really red ? What do I actually think about the government ? ‘’ You need some shadow work. Is not the time to act, is the time pounder. Also is your life. Babe nobody is behind you. If you want to take 1 year or 1 month at the crossroad nobody is coming for you. As long as you are confident about your choice. Is time to start fresh ! Step out of your comfort zone. You will learn a new skill that will get you some abundance and recognition. Be confident and trust in your decision. 

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What is love - TWICE

[cyborg-squid]

One of the many things that really struck me about Come Catastrophes or Wakes of Vultures is how Cliff's actions... really seemed to parallel those of the Lateran state? Like, he seems to be pretty clearly not affiliated with it and might be disconnected from the Sankta Empathy, but if you look at his actions and intentions, they pretty clearly parallel those of Yvangelista XI with the Summit of Nations. Both Cliff and Laterano aim to, in my eyes, use violence to control violence. Cliff puts it excellently when he says "Because if I can never end war, I have to settle for the next best thing. To hold its on-off switch in my hands." And Yvangelista basically tries to do the same, on a larger scale, trying to bring all the nations of Terra to the table for world peace, but such a meeting is only possible because of all the guns Lateran has. Cliff spent years building this mercenary empire of his, doing what sounds like black ops coup stuff for the American government.

And we see that the violence these two systems enact, in hopes of one day controlling it, isn't limited to physical violence. Wake of Vultures shows us very clearly how the bank is abusing and killing the people of Davistown, backed up by this idea of violence from mercenaries or government, but isn't called upon until the last minute. And in Lateran you have this literal ethnostate, in Guide Ahead you have these armed civil servants tripping over each other looking for this one mixed-race girl. And it's not directly in the Lateran events, but with the Lateran Church and the 'hands-off' approach it takes with regards to it's influence in Iberia, that's part of what ultimately allows for the Church of the Deep to infiltrate it. These systems, the Lateran government and Church, Blacksteel Worldwide and the Columbian government, don't need to be threatening you directly at gunpoint to get what they want, they hold enough power that simply the idea of them is enough to extort and influence people. And this is the type of power that Cliff and Yvangelista, two entirely different Sankta, independent of one another (afaik), spent years cultivating.

And this kind of brings me to something i'd been thinking about with Andoain (who also parallels Woodrow in his role vs the Pope). There's this Dorothy line, "There's no such thing as mad science", and that's a way you could certainly describe her as a good Mad Scientist, and it's in that way that I kinda think of Andoain, as someone who has, with whatever supernatural thing happened with the Lock and Key that drove him to try and kill his squad, gone Mad With Power, but in a way that's... not entirely wrong. Because so many of his critiscisms of Laterano are correct, and the way he's been building his faith and followers is this creation of the 'Sankta' Empathy, of understanding one another, just without the supernatural component. He's right! And even when he sees God in the Basement, when he realizes that his quest to change Laterano is fruitless, that still doesn't stop him from attempting to help and save those he can, with the power he has.

Similarly, you can see some of this with Woodrow, when Cliff hands him the tablet/phone and he sees the nature of Cliff's war and control, he knows he personally can't control this, but says that no one should. "...They shouldn't. There shouldn't be nobody else like you." Then he shoots the communicator. This is one of the moments that shows, despite Cliff's claims to have his hand on the lever of war, he is not the one in control, in this moment, Woodrow is, by choosing to walk away. And earlier, the bank manager demanding Franka and Liskarm disperce the crowd, they refuse, despite the bank and Cliff ostensibly being the ones in 'control', the possibility of violence at the moment didn't depend on them, but on the individuals, with Franka and Liskarm. And Jessica's "My gun will cry for their sorrow"! The system that Cliff is in 'control' does not do anything for the people of Davistown, in fact it is the one hurting them, but it is the individual violence that Jessica and the others commit through their robbery that enables change, for while they're not able to save Davistown as a whole from being consumed, they themselves are 'saved'.

And one last parallel on an already rambly post: the calls. I couldn't help but notice, the calls Cliff mentions getting from governments, from the ones ultimately in control of him, reminded me of the call Malkiewicz gets at the end of Maria Nearl where he's made spokesperson for the Chamber of Commerce. Here you have Cliff, the 'old', and the calls he gets and is beholden to, that he never thinks of just "letting ring" until Woodrow suggests that to him, and Malkiewicz as the 'young', not seeking power like Cliff did but having it thrust on him, feeling like he can't escape from it, and bound to pick up and answer the call. This idea of the 'old' feeling that they can change the system from the inside with the power they have, yet not doing so and instead perpetuating it, and this idea of the 'young' being so caught up and entwined in a system that they feel they can't move apart from it, and being unable to affect change with the power that he eventually has. I don't really know, but I just felt like there was something there with these phone calls that control.

[darcytaylor]

Isn’t it career suicide when at the peak of his fame (because it is rare to be the lead of such a huge show), Luke is not taking full advantage of the exposure?

Choosing to not attend Wimbledon, meanwhile going to fashion week shows, paying to attend an influencer networking event, and bringing his gf along to all of these?

Rationally I don’t think it makes sense. And had Luke been a person as determined and career-focused as Nic or Johny B, you would have seen him fully capitalizing on his success by making appearances everywhere and leading new projects.

But if we look at things from the angle that Luke is very sensitive and anxious (we know he suffer from anxiety and finds life overwhelming due to his ADHD), then forget about making rational decisions, all of his choices regarding work and people to keep close in his personal life would be almost 100% dictated by his anxiety.

For example, he might choose to attend events with clearer structures, less pressure on meeting and talking to others, and more welcoming toward plus ones, so he can always have a comfort person there to support him. I don’t think this is what Wimbledon is about hence he wasn’t seen there.

His choices of people around him seem questionable, but when someone is vulnerable (coping with anxiety in this case), they might appreciate qualities that normal people overlook. Most of us have got the impression that his friends/gf seem off, but perhaps they are the most tolerant toward his anxious nature while others take him for granted.

Perhaps they give him the reassurance and acknowledgment that he craves without any expectations. And from personal experience, those who display certain negative traits (eg narcissism) do thrive on relationships with vulnerable people. There is a dynamics in which the narcissist gives the vulnerable what they don’t usually get from everyone else in exchange for company and loyalty, which I have seen repeatedly in real life.

We love Pen for her intelligence and girlboss power, which match up well with Nicola’s personality in real life. However, I don’t think we are prepared to accept, in place of the dorky cheeky Colin, someone like Luke who is an anxious laid back dude who is pretty much trying to lead a life as free of nerve-wracking moments as possible.

When Nic praises Luke for being kind, supportive, hard working and having no ego, I fully believe she is not lying. She could easily be describing an anxious person who is just nice and trying to do his job well. Nic does have this motherly and assuring nature which allows her to build this great friendship with Luke and they clearly bonded via going through the experience of stepping into the spotlight. Nic has done such an amazing job with handling press and public attention; I think Luke was grateful that she was there to take most of the pressure while he could just happily sit there agreeing and showing support. There is nothing wrong with this. I am sure Luke did the best of his ability.

Realistically, I don’t know how romantically compatible Nic and Luke are. I feel that Nic is good for Luke as a more experienced costar who guides and supports him, and a smart colleague who knows how to work with Luke’s strengths and weaknesses in order to make them both shine. If Luke had chosen Nic as a love interest I wonder if this might be too much for him to measure up. Luke probably wants a relationship as something to complement his life and helps him cope with his anxiety, meanwhile Nic is likely only dating casually on the side while focusing on her career.

Wow, this is a great analysis thank you for sharing!

I do think that Luke not capitalizing more on his career is odd, but I ultimately don't think that it is career suicide. I would also need to know where Luke wants his career to go, in order for me to come to a conclusion. It has been fascinating to look on the sidelines and wonder what he is doing or where he wants to go.

I think that comparing Luke with Nicola or Johnny can be a hinder to Luke, because they are a tough competition and they obviously know where they want to go. Nicola and Johnny are incredible at what they do on all fronts of their career, they are powerhouses and you can see that they know what they want and will go the extra mile to get it. Not many people are like this. I just hope that Luke can look in from the outside and get a better idea as to what he wants and how to get it.

(or maybe he already does know what he wants and it's not the Nicola or Johnny level of fame, so he is stepping back. Or maybe because of PR moves he fucked up and is not invited to things - although I don't think that is the case, but at the end of the day I have no idea)

As far as the friends that he keeps - I can take a glance at their online personas and gather information about them to come to a conclusion, but I also know that social media can be very misleading and will never tell you the whole story about people. It may be ignorant of me to judge them, but then I also know that they are the ones responsible for creating what they put out into the world.

Luke has been friends with them for a while now (especially Rory) and that alone can be very comforting. Just knowing that they know you on a personal level and you can be who you are regardless of anything. Especially if you have anxiety (I suffer from this as well), knowing that you don't have to mask or hide a version of yourself, lets the anxiety fade into the background a little.

Luke has also stated that he is a very empathetic person. Even if he sees friends/people in his life have questionable actions, an empathetic person will/can try to look past that. A narcissist would thrive on that and easily be able to take advantage.

I completely agree that Luke was grateful to have Nicola on his team. To have her by his side in all of the craziness that Bridgerton can bring. Nicola is smart and compassionate, she knows what she is doing.

As far as Luke and Nicola being compatible? I have no idea. Since we only see a very small part of who they actually are, I can't say what their dynamic would look like if they were a couple or if they would/could thrive together. I do think that they compliment each other professionally and that could be a good sign/starter for a romantic relationship.

[aziraphales-library]

Hello and thank you so much for your work! Recently I was on kick for het!human!azicrowley and have read a lot of ones where Aziraphale is a women and Crowley a man (or, in one memorable occasion, genderfluid person). But I want to look at the other side! So maybe you have some recs for women!Crowley/man!Aziraphale? Preferable longish fics, especially great if it's hystorical au (any era will be great), and also I would absolutely love if fic plays with Crowley having reputation of some kind of fallen women (good play of words huh!), absolutely not suitable for respectable man as Aziraphale, but it's optional. Crowley also doesen't need to be strictly women, but preferable woman passing for outsiders for mist part!

Hi! We have a #female crowley tag you can check out. Here are some longer human aus, in a few of which Crowley is a woman and a couple where Crowley is genderfluid...

A Collar For Christmas by Quefish (E)

Aziraphale is a farmer in a small village in the country and his life is everything he ever wanted. But a bank snafu sends him into the city where he meets bank manager Toni Crowley. Is he willing to give everything up for a woman he just met?

Seeing You Home by TawnyOwl95 (E)

It’s time for a new start. And just how many of those has Crowley had since she found herself pregnant at seventeen? This time it will be different though. This time she has a job, and a house and she doesn’t need another boyfriend. Especially not one who lives right next door. Aziraphale Angel’s new start is proving tougher than he ever imagined. Eighteen months out of the Catholic Church and he’s still finding it hard to let go of certain beliefs about himself. And his new neighbour is determined to test every one of them.

Incorporation by Ack_Emma (E)

Best friends from rival wool merchant families, Antoinetta Crowley and Aziraphale Fell are shocked when their parents arrange a surprise marriage between them. But this new arrangement is a chance to be on their own side and to be left alone for a bit. Their lifelong friendship is solid, what could go wrong? As it turns out, plenty. Times are changing, and married life is harder than it looks when you're a pair of young, ineffable dorks.

More Than by NaroMoreau (E)

Crowley would like to spend another year without marrying, especially when thrust-forced to pick a husband. She refuses to cave in on a matter of principles. She refuses to cave in specifically on a matter of not wanting to be married to Lucien Morningstar. But she might need a hand to break free from such a burden. And who knows? She might even find something else along the way.

The Sometimes Wife by AgentStannerShipper (E)

It is a truth universally acknowledged that older brothers are the worst. As the youngest of three children, Parson Aziraphale Fell has been given an ultimatum: find a wife, or lose the family's support. The only problem? Aziraphale has never looked at a woman that way in his life. His attention has instead been captured by the family gardener, a beautiful young man who holds Aziraphale's heart in his hands. But when a mysterious newcomer arrives in the village, Aziraphale finds himself falling - quite unexpectedly - for her as well. Aziraphale knows he will have to choose. After all, it's not as if he can have both...can he?

Brave to Stay, Brave to Leave by ChristocentricQueer (M)

“Great, a pastor. Why does he have to be so bloody cute?” Crowley mumbled under his breath. A Human AU where Crowley and Aziraphale are both in their late fifties. Crowley is gender fluid and bisexual (He/Him and She/Her). Aziraphale is a transman and gay (He/Him). Crowley is a botanist who is agnostic. Aziraphale is a Protestant pastor in a fictional denomination. They live in Tadfield, a medium sized town in the United States. Slow build with a happy ending.

- Mod D

[theresattrpgforthat]

Have you ever come across a game with a deckbuilding element? I've seen deckbuilding games with some roleplaying adjacent additions (Like the arkham horror card game), but not the other way around.

THEME: Deck-building Games

Hello friend, so I think I have a few that are in the same kind of field as deck-builders, although your mileage may vary. I certainly hope there are also folks who see this and know of some more games to add to this little list!

This Ship Is No Mother, by Thomas || New Madras.

This Ship Is No Mother is a game about people in space, working jobs that are probably going to get them killed. Inspired by movies like Alien and games like Mothership and Dread, this is for fans of tension, creepy-crawlies, and general horror. Mechanically, it's a card-based Forged in the Dark game, first in the series of games currently called the Cardsharp Sonata.

In this game, players start with a full deck of cards and as you play, that deck will run down. When the deck ends, there is a climactic moment of panic as one of the characters is going to do something stupid and get themselves (and maybe everyone else) killed.

I’d say that This Ship Is No Mother is kind of adjacent to a deck-building game. You use a regular deck of playing cards to resolve actions, but the resolution system takes inspiration from Blades in the Dark. Your cards don’t stay in your own personal deck; but you can choose to hold onto certain cards in your hand so that you can play them in dramatically appropriate moments, or spend them to make sure your character succeeds when they need to. The game was originally designed to run Mothership scenarios in a more story-game friendly way, so if you like Forged in the Dark mechanics, you might want to check out this game.

Perfect Draw!, by Double Summon Games.

Perfect Draw! is a tabletop role-playing game based on the Powered By The Apocalypse framework that combines Trading Card Games with collaborative storytelling - allowing you to tell stories similar to card game anime like Yu-Gi-Oh!, Duel Masters, and CardFight! Vanguard.

In Perfect Draw! you can make any deck you imagine using our open-ended card creation system - then, clash ideals with villains and allies alike in tense card game combat. Your deck is an extension of your beliefs and the blade that allows you to change the world. Use your passion, skill, and friendship to get the upper hand on foes and save the people you care about most!

Perfect Draw is a game in which you design your cards as you add them to your hand. Your cards exist as physical objects in your hand as you play, but they also represent special attacks and moves in the fiction of the game. As you play, you’ll gain more cards, but rather than relying on symbols or text to tell you what these cards do, you’ll have to author them yourself, using guidelines and inspiration from the specific character playbooks. You’ll also be rolling dice in the style of PbtA games, thus combining the feeling of a card duelling game and a TTRPG.

If you want to emulate the tropes of card-collecting games while designing your custom moves as you play, you might want to try out Perfect Draw!

Cardsharps, by Pageantry Games.

Armed with a deck of cards, this game helps you to nimbly guide your cast of characters on a merry waltz from mishap to catastrophe. For the tone, think of an old-timey farce, or a Coen Brothers movie, or perhaps your own muddled and terrifying existence.

Another game that uses playing cards, Cardsharps looks like it can fit a number of settings, with the four suits representing your stats. You shuffle your hand whenever you enter a test of some kind, and draw a random one - if you draw the Suit you need, you do it, if you get the same colour but wrong suit you get a mixed success, and if you draw the wrong colour completely, it’s a failure.

The randomness that comes from the shuffle reminds me a little bit of deck-building card games I’ve played in the past, although you’re not really adding anything to your hand. I think the core concept is interesting though, and might be something you could play around with to make a game that suits your tastes.

Orchidelirium, by Æther Corp.

Take on the mantle of a grizzled and hardy orchid hunter in 1865, traversing the depths of uncharted territories in search of rare, elusive, and above all, expensive orchids for your shady employer, J. Carmichael & Associates.

For the Games Master, Orchidelirium provides a simple ruleset, an adventure, and improvisation tools to help build an adventure of discovery at the table.

Orchidelerium is another game that uses playing cards with some cards in your hand being used as resources, while others are pulled from the deck to represent obstacles. I don’t know if it’s exactly a deck-building game because your hand is so small, but it does have a few similarities, namely the fact that different cards have different values, and thus will be used differently depending on the nature of the obstacle. The game itself revolves around orchid-hunters in the late 1800’s, which means that colonial themes are going to be present - a good thing to keep in mind when introducing this game to your play group.

Parselings, by Smunchy Games.

Parselings is a modern Deck building RPG about using collaborative word magic and discovering your place in it. The game takes place in a world like our own, but with one major difference – to some, words have literal power. Parsecytes, swarms of ravenous ink-like parasitic organisms, have emerged into the world causing irreversible changes to society and our ecosystem. 

When a Parsecyte invades a human host, it forms a symbiosis with them, together becoming an entity known as a Parseling. At a glance, Parselings are indiscernible from most other humans except for the labels on their skin and the ink mixed into their blood. When brought together in groups, these individuals become greater than the sum of their parts. The infected hosts can use their tattoos to form phrases and sculpt the world to their desires. This power has come to be known as a Parse.

You will play as one of these beings. Struggling to strike a balance between appeasing the Parsecyte within, and proving you are a complex human being who cannot only be defined by a few careless words. This is both a curse and a blessing, but with the others that share your affliction, the world is your oyster. 

This is the first game I think of when someone asks about deck-building ttrpgs. Each player gets a deck that uses regular playing cards to represent core aspects of your characters. The game isn’t dice-less - you still need some d6’s and d10’s - but those dice will only be rolled by the GM. Card decks aren’t the only interesting mechanic in Parselings - you’ll also construct pieces of your character with words that describe who they are and how they fit into the world around them. I think this might be a neat game to check out if you want to explore questions of identity while mixing in a little bit of the supernatural.

Smunchy Games has two supplements for Parselings: Infer Memorial Station, which works as an introductory adventure, and Nominal City Guide, a setting for groups to pick up and explore.

[guardian5tiger3]

A reading about the person you're thinking of .

Groups-

1 2

3 4

5 6

Group one

This person's soul has called them to move in some sort of way in order to be able to build themselves up to be able to give to others and be ok within themselves. This is a very honest and I heard charismatic person. They were in some state of lack in some way and I feel now theyre going to come out and people will see that they're better off now, this very well could be financially.they might have many suitors. They might like to trip(on psychedelics) or have been wanting to. There's some negative and irritating energy surrounding them. 2 is significant. You might not know if you want to talk to or hear from this person , or something in yourself is confused . You guys may have stopped talking. You are more positive energetical than a lot of the people they deal with. It seems like your connection would be positive if you talked again. And any bickering would just sort of be petty and unnecessary but I don't even see that happening really. Only to work things out.

Group two

I'm seeing there's a possibility of you two seeing eachother in some type of more social setting. They might be pissed off at or hurt by you. They might not be open to you but it's like they actually really care. You guys , your best bet might be to try to show this person you care if you want a reconnection. Even then this individual is being weird. I wouldn't hope for too much regarding this person but for some of you if you see them or have the chance to talk to them and you want to try, it very well could be worth a shot. I don't think this person accepts that you care. And if you show it they doubt you.this is their own issues. If you feel that you love them, then I think they love you too. So you might have to pour your heart out. Maybe you need to do a lot to earn their trust or something. Even then this person might still choose to not entertain it. Cold. I can't see too far into the future for you or this person, though.

Group three

I'm literally envisioning something spinning or turning. It kind of feels like , dizzy. Someone might be very sick or have had a panic attack. I'm getting that this person is sweet and it seems like they can be involved with other people in a good way but they're still standing alone somehow because they seem like they don't need anybody. But right now they may be troubled and they need people to be there for them and nobody would assume that of this person because they are somewhat respected and or ignored because you wouldn't expect this from them. They almost seem like even if issues they're going through were to arise they wouldn't be so affected. I feel a lot in my heart so this person is loving they could possibly be motherly. People think they're doing good and continuously doing better and honestly they might be but something is wrong for them. This is your calling to show them support and love and offer them help. I saw a hand being offered someone else taking the offer and grabbing their hand.(softly) a sweet vision really. Whoever you came here for though needs support. For some of you this is really dire and I got a feeling in my stomach telling me what I just wrote is very true..

Group four

This person is trying to build up to something but might be having blockages. This person might have some hidden heartbreak or conflict going on but they cope well. They try to come off as super content but I feel like someone or something has been stealing this person's sunshine, or they did this to someone else . If so I don't think they knew what they were doing , but it's as if they felt the need to be weird about it so how do you not know..I'm getting something about a rabbit . This person might party. They might like to put on makeup heavy. They're coming off sort of egotistical or full of themselves. Some form of karma has been and is sneaking up on them and they've been trying to fight it off and or hide from it.

Group five

*roles could be reversed in this.

Is this a goddamn crush? Some of you this is a crush. OTHERS of you, this person keeps you up at night regardless. You guys there must be something you heard about them or even some type of rejection that took place. It could even just be something you're telling yourself in regards to this person. People the advice I'm being given to give to you all is to please make sure you're emotionally balanced. Not that you don't feel deeply. To feel deep is a super power. But make sure it's balanced. They might actually be pretty intrigued by you guys but you don't want it to be a scenario where you scare them away. With you guys your energy is deep like fucking Narnia in a person so the energy within you can be many energies , whatever youre feeling. So balance your priorities and I'm really feeling you need to metaphorically let the water settle and become still within yourself. You all are beautiful truly. It's just that this person doesn't seem to know you like that deep as you can be , and we're talking about first impressions of that level inside of you here. This person could also end up consumed by you. Holyy shit. You know if this person ends up not being able to handle you, which isn't even the case for most of you. But if it is, then there is someone out there who will love it and thrive being with you. I feel a lot of infatuation this person or someone has about you and it seems like it's just about your energy and a sense of mysteriousness. Regarding this person though, they seem like they're somewhat trying to analyze a situation most likely with you as to how and if they should approach in what way.

Guys this is not a negative message as I can relate to you guys a lot. 👍🏽Infact what you have to be that deep of a person is a gift.

Group six

You guys I got super warm immediately and had to go turn on the a/c.i think the ice cream is trying to represent the same energy. This person might have had to chill out or cool off I guess and while doing that I see they have grown to a good but certain extent and they don't seem to want to move any further. Seems like they're stuck in a comfort zone. I heard pied Piper so I had to look that one up and it says someone who offers and then doesn't go through with it basically. and yeah this person might be greedy or weird like that in some way . They could be like a scam artist type. For a lot of you this is too harsh but somebody needed to know. I wanted to say capisce so I don't know maybe they say that or something. I don't talk like that lol. Spirit just wants to let you guys know that they're stagnant I guess. Especially for someone they ripped someone innocent off . Also‼️this could be someone who did this to the person you're asking about but that's definitely not for everyone, I feel like you'll probably know. I feel like there's a lot more to this but I'm not getting anything else. Hmm.

[tarotofzhivamoon]

Pick a picture reading

Why aren’t they making the first move?

Hi! Thank you for stopping by and reading my work. I hope that you’re going to find the guidance that you need🫶🏻 You can now book a reading with me! Visit my services here and just message me if you are interested in booking any reading.

Pause and take a big breath in, then choose the pile you feel the most drawn to🦋

Masterlist • P@tr30n • Personal readings

Pile 1

Your person isn’t making the first move right now because they feel extremely intimidated by you, by your energy but also by how you are making them feel when you are around you. There’s this nervous energy about them that is coming through really strong because you as a person, you demand respect from those around you just by the way you present yourself, the way you enter a room and how you navigate life and that’s simply too powerful and way too intimidating for your person. It’s almost like they feel as though they’re not on your level yet, they haven’t really explored themselves, but also the world the way you’ve done and they just feel really insecure when it comes to approaching you. It seems as though they’re really struggling because this person could be very domineering, energy wise, as well, but you’re far more powerful than they are and they haven’t really met someone who could actually stand up to them or is as sure of themselves, sure of what they want and actually taking the necessary action to get it. It could be that you’re the one who approached them as well when you’ve met, your eyes might’ve locked on them and you weren’t simply passively waiting for them to come to you because you simply give off that energy of “I want it, I got it” and you don’t really give up or stop until you actually have what you want. They’re simply impressed by you and who you are as a person, they are studying you but keeping their distance a little bit because maybe they’ve been used to be the one who’s in control or to actually make the first move in relationships, come up with the initiative to do something or take some form of action and you just flipped their entire world around by simply being this amazing you. This person is so into you that they just freeze when it comes to actually coming towards you, they have no idea how to act, how to react, how to respond because again, you’re a person who knows what they want and now it’s making them feel like they don’t want to do or say the wrong thing and lose your interest because they didn’t play their cards right with you.

If you enjoyed this reading, the full, in depth reading is available to read on P@tr30n which you can find in my masterlist pinned post. Thank you so much for your support💗

Likes and rbs are appreciated🦋

Pile 2

Your person isn’t making the first move just yet because they are feeling very disconnected from you emotionally, they don’t really know if you are interested in them just as much as they are interested in you and they really seem to be very self conscious about the way that they are showing up with you. They are looking at things from a higher perspective, debating, thinking, analyzing and honestly the conclusions that they have reached have been pretty unfair towards you. There might be some accusations in the end on you as well, that you’re not doing this and that, that you’re not showing up and you also could be the one to actually make the first move and they don’t have to be the ones doing that at all and they are just trying to assign blame everywhere else but on themselves where it kind of is necessary. The two of you really need to sit down and have and open and honest conversation about where the two of you are at mentally, emotionally but also in this connection so that the two of you can actually address the root cause of that resentment that they have been building and forget past mistakes in order for you to move forward with the connection. This person seems to be lurking in the ‘shadows’, from behind the scene and they are actually looking through your social media, checking to see what you’ve been doing, what you’ve been sharing, maybe even looking to see if you’ve shared something for them specifically that you’re not actually saying to them directly. Instead of messaging you and trying to be mature and act like an adult, they are actually choosing to play games and actively look for passive messages for them that you might be sending them. They might be the type of person who’s not very experienced in communication, they might struggle to initiate them or even talk about difficult things that kind of need to be addressed so their other options is to just avoid those conversations and try to find answers through other means that are very indirect and non-confrontational.

If you enjoyed this reading, the full, in depth reading is available to read on P@tr30n which you can find in my masterlist pinned post. Thank you so much for your support💗

Likes and rbs are appreciated🦋

Dividers by Kawaii-Lau on Tumblr🦋

[tarotofzhivasmoon]

Pick a picture reading.

Why aren’t they making the first move?💌

Pause and take a big breath in, then choose the pile you feel the most drawn to🦋

You can now book a reading with me! Visit my services here and just message me if you are interested in booking any service!

Pile 1

Your person isn’t making the first move right now because they feel extremely intimidated by you, by your energy but also by how you are making them feel when you are around you. There’s this nervous energy about them that is coming through really strong because you as a person, you demand respect from those around you just by the way you present yourself, the way you enter a room and how you navigate life and that’s simply too powerful and way too intimidating for your person. It’s almost like they feel as though they’re not on your level yet, they haven’t really explored themselves, but also the world the way you’ve done and they just feel really insecure when it comes to approaching you. It seems as though they’re really struggling because this person could be very domineering, energy wise, as well, but you’re far more powerful than they are and they haven’t really met someone who could actually stand up to them or is as sure of themselves, sure of what they want and actually taking the necessary action to get it. It could be that you’re the one who approached them as well when you’ve met, your eyes might’ve locked on them and you weren’t simply passively waiting for them to come to you because you simply give off that energy of “I want it, I got it” and you don’t really give up or stop until you actually have what you want. They’re simply impressed by you and who you are as a person, they are studying you but keeping their distance a little bit because maybe they’ve been used to be the one who’s in control or to actually make the first move in relationships, come up with the initiative to do something or take some form of action and you just flipped their entire world around by simply being this amazing you. This person is so into you that they just freeze when it comes to actually coming towards you, they have no idea how to act, how to react, how to respond because again, you’re a person who knows what they want and now it’s making them feel like they don’t want to do or say the wrong thing and lose your interest because they didn’t play their cards right with you.

The full, in depth reading is available to read on Patreon. Thank you so much for your support💗

Heart and reblog this post if it resonated with you🦋

Pile 2

Your person isn’t making the first move just yet because they are feeling very disconnected from you emotionally, they don’t really know if you are interested in them just as much as they are interested in you and they really seem to be very self conscious about the way that they are showing up with you. They are looking at things from a higher perspective, debating, thinking, analyzing and honestly the conclusions that they have reached have been pretty unfair towards you. There might be some accusations in the end on you as well, that you’re not doing this and that, that you’re not showing up and you also could be the one to actually make the first move and they don’t have to be the ones doing that at all and they are just trying to assign blame everywhere else but on themselves where it kind of is necessary. The two of you really need to sit down and have and open and honest conversation about where the two of you are at mentally, emotionally but also in this connection so that the two of you can actually address the root cause of that resentment that they have been building and forget past mistakes in order for you to move forward with the connection. This person seems to be lurking in the ‘shadows’, from behind the scene and they are actually looking through your social media, checking to see what you’ve been doing, what you’ve been sharing, maybe even looking to see if you’ve shared something for them specifically that you’re not actually saying to them directly. Instead of messaging you and trying to be mature and act like an adult, they are actually choosing to play games and actively look for passive messages for them that you might be sending them. They might be the type of person who’s not very experienced in communication, they might struggle to initiate them or even talk about difficult things that kind of need to be addressed so their other options is to just avoid those conversations and try to find answers through other means that are very indirect and non-confrontational.

The full, in depth reading is available to read on Patreon. Thank you so much for your support💗

Heart and reblog this post if it resonated with you🦋

[vaspider]

If you think that Joel was wrong, I don't want you anywhere near me.

Let's talk about the last episode.

I'm going to say right up front that I'm a parent, and I'm a survivor of medical abuse, so I'm not going to brook any bullshit or clownery in the notes of this post. I block easily and freely, and if what I say in this post makes you feel sad or defensive, I encourage you to sit with those feelings and interrogate why you're feeling so defensive, because to me, this is extremely cut and dry.

Joel was right. Marlene was wrong. There is no argument to be had here, because this is the Trolley Problem, With Zombies!

Let me be clear: there is no world in which I let them do anything like that to my child, but more importantly, there is no world in which I let them do that to Cat without her active, informed consent. That's where there's no argument to be had. That's where it is open and shut, no discussion, if you think that there is an argument you are just wrong.

There is no nuance on this for me, and that's probably because I am a victim of medical abuse, doctors doing things to me without my informed consent. I find it hard to empathize with people who think there's any nuance in it at all, however. You cannot build a new, just world on the abuse, medical rape, and murder of a child. You just can't. This is the Trolley Problem writ large, and the only moral answer is that the only way to do that would be with Ellie's informed, active consent.

There are decisions my daughter has made which changed her life forever, and made it (at minimum) much, much more difficult, and which might shorten her lifespan or kill her. I supported her in this because she made that decision. It was not made for her. So I have absolutely clear-eyed perspective on this as a parent, and I don't think there's room for another perspective.

Oh, so people might die if Ellie isn't at minimum lobotomized and at worst killed? Yeah, that's the same argument that forced birthers make. No one has a right to any part of my body or anything within it without my consent, and saying otherwise is exactly the same argument that the people who think that people shouldn't be able to get abortions make, it only differs in scale.

It reminds me of the old joke where a man asks a woman if she'd sleep with him for a million dollars, and she agrees, and he says, okay, so what about five dollars? The woman gets irate and says "what kind of woman do you take me for?" And the man replies, "We've already established what kind of woman you are, now we're just haggling over price."

If generic-you think it's okay to take Ellie's body and use it without her permission to save a million people, you're the same kind of person who thinks it's okay to force someone to carry a pregnancy to term. It's already been established that you think that people don't have a right to their body if someone else "needs" it, so we know what kind of person you are. Now we're just haggling over the price. I know that's wording it very strongly and I stand by it, because I've dealt with exactly this kind of paternalistic nonsense, and it did almost kill me. No one is justified in making any decisions about my body but me. Period.

And before we have folx coming in here talking about vaccines, etc.? Listen. If I choose not to vaccinate myself, and I'm excluded from things as a result, then that's a decision that I have made. I don't think people should be physically forced to be vaccinated, but groups of people get to consent or not consent, as a group, via laws, about being around someone who will physically make them sick. The key difference here is about who is doing what to whom, and whether someone is acting upon another person. Walking past someone in public in a leather harness isn't going to modify their organs via pathogen; walking past someone spreading a pathogen that hangs out in the air for hours out of your gaping, infectious piehole is actively doing something to other people.

Joel was right. Thank you, goodnight.

[lonewolfwrittenuniverses]

Thunder Wolf

Maria Hill x wolfshifter!reader.

Summary: reader is a kid raised between Hydra and Red Room lines. She saw at least two generations of Widows graduate from the program. Madame Hydra's favorite pet.

Would reader be able to build a normal life?

⚠️ Trigger warning: mentions of wounds, torture. Standard warnings.

Enjoy! Feedback is very welcomed.

🐺🐺🐺🐺🐺

Some would say that life can be an adventure, full of adrenaline, tragedy. But yours? You've covered all possible bases with an tad add of madness.

You don't have memories of a family, as you grew older some kids you lived with told you you arraived to small to the school. Barely a two year old, but there was something special about you. Training and lessons, many years of blood and tears smeared on the floor. The school you were in was a ballet one but, for some reason you weren't taught dancing. You were taught to fight and survival. At some point the other kids joined you on this lessons, but while they were instructed to dancing you were taken to a laboratory.

That's when you met a woman that became a somewhat mother to you. Melina, she was a scientist. She did a bunch of tests specially when you were on your animal shape. A wolf, well you were a pup so your size was a medium dog. They wanted to duplicate that ability of yours.

The worse was when Melina wasn't around, the other scientists were cruel.

You truly have no idea how many years you were on the Red Room. You saw at least two generations of Black Widows rise. You weren't one of them you were their dear Grom Volk, Thunder Wolf.

It's been at least two decades since the last time you spent time with Melina or went on a mission with her. The last time you somewhat knew of her was a little over a decade ago.

For some reason Madame Hydra left you on this facility since half a year ago, which is odd you used to be her main bodyguard. Your shifting ability allows you to pass as her exotic pet. Every few months a chopper comes and throws some food an essentials for you and the rest of the guards but, usually you go to hunt.

Tonight you are lazyly lying on the rooftop of the facility. The full moon shining brightly, you are enthralled by it. Full moon leaves you restless, small cracks of lighting scape your claws when you tap them against the concrete.

Taking your eyes off the bright satellite, your eyes scan the wooden perimeter, at first everything seems normal. Until you catch some odd movement. You quickly shift back to your human form and call for a status report of the agents, seemingly nothing out of normal. But, something is wrong... You tell them to keep alert and choose to investigate yourself. Jumping out of the building you shifted back into wolf form and barely made any sound. Now on the ground you quickly catched three unknown scents. And you growled in annoyance, bunch of incompetent guards you will bite their asses before requesting an exchange.

It didn't took long to locate the three women, one tall, two average. One of them smelled different, powerful. The other smelled... that smell, you got that smell somewhere else, it might be a traitor. You tuned your ears to pick up their exchange through comms.

"Hill, we got the intel. Maximoff found something else there's an enhanced, we need to get away fast".

If Madame Hydra finds about your failure she will skin you alive. You gather energy and grow up your form to double size, you weren't small to begin with being a northwestern wolf. And now you are the size of a nightmare.

Picking up speed you go around the taller one and block her path.

*Guys, if by enhanced you mean a massive wolf with sparkling white eyes. Is standing right in front of me* Maria can't help but admire the fur on the giant wolf grey and black like a raging storm.

("I suggest you three surrender, and handover the Intel you stole") she hides her surprise at the voice in her head, she is kind of used to by now thanks to Wanda.

*We are going for you* Romanoff says on her earpiece.

What you didn't know was that one of them went for the quinjet, while the other came running to the rescue. You heard the person coming, so you went to attack the one in front of you.

For your surprise she was agile and a good shooter, but your quick healing made it useless. The bleeding stopped immediately and years of training meant you didn't even felt the wounds, she would need better placement of her shots.

*Maximoff any time now, would be helpful* she shouted while she dodged your claw that end up stuck on the bark of a tree. The woman sprinted away and you yanked your claws back to pounce at the agent to end her when a force pushed you off against a tree. Rolling a couple of times you stand up and snarl at the other woman. She has some red smoke surrounding her hands.

"Come with us, we can help you".

("I don't need your help, I have my orders")

You go again against them.

"Hill! Go, I will stop them" Wanda orders and leaps to meet you half way.

----

You gotta admit, that brunette with red powers is one of the most powerful beings you have fought against. And for your shame she is managing to run away. While you fought she caught your knee with a boulder and you can barely make it move. Even when you called your agents she decimated them like flies.

*Wanda! Protect yourself I'm firing from the back gate*

You see their airplane hovering above, there's no way she can jump that high.

The shooting begins, and your get a little slower dodging in zig zag the shots. But that woman is a good shooter, she caught you a couple of times. Enraged you set off an electrical shockwave that burns her incoming rain of bullets, and you see the brunette raising up using her powers.

On a last ditch effort you use all your strength to jump up your sharp teeth latch on the end on the metal gate rattling the entire aircraft. You quickly scramble to latch with your claws and begin to hike up. When the brunette enhanced makes the mistake of stepping on the metal gate you electrocute her unconscious, Madame Hydra would enjoy having her on her ranks.

The woman on the cock pit begins to do some evasive manoeuvres but you latch to the metal panels like your life depended on it *Hill! Shoot them down!"

You try to pounce on the one they call Hill, but when the pilot turns around your brain freezes... Natalia? Is that- red energy blasts you against the aircraft side panel. Your body doesn't even touch the floor when is flung away like garbage out of the jet. The last image you have is Natalia's panicked green eyes.

"Bad dog!" Wanda sneers as she allows herself to collapse on the floor.

---

"Wake her up" a voice orders. The agents throw iced cold water on the wolf chained to the floor. The wolf's white bright eyes open with confusion.

Your master heeled boots is the first thing you see before she crouches. Letting you see her face "oh my dear Volk Grom. So many years of service. Remind me, why you got this scar?" She says caressing your muzzle her thumb running over the jagged scar that runs from the top of the bridge on your nose across your lips.

"I allowed Romanova scape" the woman hums "and guess what you just did again? This time she stole highly sensitive intelligence".

("Ma'am I didn't know it was her. I tried to stop them, they brought the enhanced, Maximoff-").

"Did you?!" She asks cutting you off at your confused expression she elaborates "did you stopped them?".

"No ma'am".

"I am a woman of word, unlike you. I warned you" her pristine nails dig deep on the skin of your muzzle, she stands up and walks to the exit door "Do not worry, I will make a good coat out of your fur. I might even give it to Vostokoff as a present".

---

Maria curses all the wrong intel collected by Tony that led her to this disastrous mission. She has no back up near. She is in the middle of Canada during winter, fucking cold. She has been running away from several Hydra squads for a week. No signal, the winter storms blocking off any chance of communication.

The temperature is getting lower, she opts to try to find a small cave where she can shelter from the cold winds.

Huge is her surprise, when she enters a small cave and blood smell assault her nose. At first she wants to backtrack and run the heck away, she can't afford to waste bullets. The only thing she can see is a huge lump laying on the stone, labored breath. Slowly she beings to shuffle back.

---

You are lying on the cold stone floor on a cave, Madame Hydra goons are stupid they were supposed to kill you and they only left you halfway to death. But they literally skinned you while you were outcold. You spent an agonizing month regrowing your skin on the abandoned facility, by now you have most of your fur. Took the chance and scaped the facility. Your wounds were infected your body put everything into regrowing the skin.

A faint sound of shuffling puts you on high alert. Then the smell, gunpowder. With a lot of effort you barely open your left eye and you see a human silhouette, by the sound a gun is trained on you.

("Riddle the skull with bullets") your voice is strained and groggy.

"What?" The woman looks around trying to find someone else inside the cave.

"Is anyone here?" She asks lowly eyes darting around.

("Me, the wolf dying on the floor") you answer again.

"Thunder Wolf?" She asks with disbelief, you hear her walking up to you with more confidence. The Intel they recovered also had some about you. Natasha was feeling bad, you were like a sister to her and she left you again.

("Now, I feel bad. You know my name. I don't yours") you grunt trying to raise you head, but fail you just lay back down with a whimper. ("Will you tell me, before you kill me?") You ask your voice getting weaker you ran a lot to make it up to this place.

"I'm not here to kill you. I am actually running away from two Hydra squads".

("Shame, I could use a couple of bullets in the head").

Maria kneels down close to your head, you feel her covering your eye as she shines her tactical lamp on the low setting, her breath hitches a little at the sight of fresh and dried blood soaking your fur.

"What happened?".

("No longer useful to my former master. But their goons couldn't kill me").

"Maria Hill"

("Y/N Volkov")

---

After some assessment from Maria, not that she could do much. She end up curling on your stomach to keep warm by your insistence. It hurted like a bitch at first when she put her weight on your body, but you said nothing wrapping your tail around her trying to give her more warmth.

Two days later, now you know that because Maria has some gadgets. You hear movement on the woods.

("Hill. I hear people") as soon as Maria raises up you do too ("they are far enough. But we need to go, now"). The two of you silently walk to the entrance. But Maria's boots make some sound, no doubt the scrunch of boots through the snow and the prints will sell out both of you.

("Hill. Get on my back. I know somewhere where we can lay low. They have signal").

"Are you crazy?!" She hisses lowly close to your face.

("Shut up and do as I say") you glare at her you bright white wolf eyes running through her soul.

----

In the end Maria did as you said. It hurted like crazy when her weight settled on your back and held onto your fur making your still sensitive skin burn. But you barely grunted ("lay across my back, or you will end up with frost bite").

With a quick walk you put a half mile distance before you begun picking up speed. Some of your wounds begun opening up, the cold luckily made the blood cloat quickly before it fell to the pristine white snow. Still you ran through the snow.

By night time you made it to the farm. A cattle farm "Are you sure is safe for you?" Hill asks the cattle doesn't seem faced by your wolf form and their guard dogs look actually excited to see you.

("Owner good man. He fed me after I saved his dogs from a wolf pack. He wanted to take me to a vet. I ran away").

You limp heavily and your body wobbles. Maria end up somewhat supporting your weight on your right side. Until you made it to the barn and collapsed by the hen stack.

The guard dogs came running first licking your face and muzzle like over excited pups. You barely grunted in annouyance some of them end up jumping and booping you with their snout making your body ache.

Maria was about to walk to the house when a man walked in, the dogs immediately moved back. He saw the gun on Maria's hand and the blood on your fur "did you shot it?!" He shouted aiming his riffle at the unknown person.

"No, no. I-she guided me here. I was lost in the woods" she easily lies, *she was already hurt when she found me" she says holstering back her gun raising her hands to show she means no harm.

"Her? My god, I thought it was a male. She is huge. I'm Adam by the way" he extends his right hand with a warm smile "sorry for aiming my gun on you".

She shakes his hand "Nice to meet you Adam, I'm Maria. I understand. Would you mind if I call some friends to pick us up? I can get her the best medical care possible".

"No problem, let me get you some blankets for her. You can spend the night inside the house".

"Thank you, but if you don't mind I can stay with her here. My friends should be here in the morning".

----

*Maria are you sure? My mother was sent a coat made of Y/N's fur a week ago. She is dead* Natasha says with her voice almost cracking.

*Nat, I'm no joking I'm with her. She is awfully wounded, needs medical asap*.

*See you in a few hours*.

Truth to her words Natasha, Wanda, Clint and medical team were at the farm right when the sun was raising. They came with new blankets for the man that helped you two.

The redhead walked to were you lay and kneeled in front of your face "Hey sis, I'm sorry. This time I will help you" Natasha says to you softly in Russian, leaning down she lays her forehead on yours, by now you are so exhausted that you barely open your eyes to see her blurry face. But that green gaze, no doubt is Nat. If the people you hear around are with her, then you can trust. While medical team made initial assessment. Natasha took the chance to hack into the surveillance system and erased the previous hours leaving a loop.

---

Now at the compound, a couple of days later the one and only Melina Vostokoff arraived with Yelena.

The Russian matriarch and Yelena simply walked in like they owned the place, they gave no warning to Natasha of their arraival. Agents surrounded them with guns drown as they made their way to the medical wing unfaced by the operative going on around them.

"Y/N Volkov, where is she?" Melina asked in the front desk.

"I can't tell you. Is classified" the nurse said.

"Yelena call your sister" Melina instructed as she jumped over the desk and put a gun on the nurse "I suggest you tell me" the Russian said as she hacked into the system.

"What the hell is going on here?" Maria stormed in right in time to hear the blonde on the phone telling Natasha to bring her ass to the medical wing of the compound.

"Who are you?" Maria asked.

"Yelena, Y/N's sister. She is our mom Melina" Yelena asked with a bored expression "Can you tell your agents to lower their guns, their are shaking. They will shot someone".

"Agents stand down. You two come with me" Maria instructed. Melina smirked at her, she holstered her gun giving the nurse a "sorry, it was not personal" she said walking off with the other two.

The deputy director took them to the private room you are staying in. You are still on your wolf form. Now clean and some wounds bandaged. Some missing patches of fur and spots with still raw skin, others also bandaged had raw muscle, those were still fighting infection.

"My beautiful volk. Who did this to you?" Melina gets closer to gently run her hand over the soft fur.

Yelena gets closer too and puts her forehead on yours "You are safe now" she says softly in Russian.

The door opens to a very angry Natasha "Mother, Yelena. What's the meaning of this?" She hisses low to not startle you.

"I needed to see my daughter Natasha and make sure she is properly tended".

---

Yeah, mama Vostokoff took over, she gladly paired up with Helen to use her tech to heal the patches of still raw muscle.

Your waking up comes a couple of days later, the soft flip over of pages begins to pull you into conciousness. There's another sound, polishing... Someone is polishing a gun... The smells are familiar.

"She is waking up" the accent, you get spooked by that voice and the freight is reflected on the heartbeat monitor.

You open your eyes, the right one is still blurry the other is clear. Yeah, is the woman you fought against, your mind quickly catches the fact of her lack of battle suit.

Yelena takes advantage of your hesitation and puts herself between you and Wanda. Your sight focuses on the blonde only, could it be? With a lot of effort you raise up and get off the bed grunting in pain, your limbs trembling with effort, the blonde extends her right hand with a soft smile that image is such a mirror to the Red Room, Yelena was a pipsqueak still but fearless, in your wolf form she extended her tiny hand to boop your nose. ("sestrichka?") You ask, that smile and the bright amber eyes.

"Da, is me Yelena" you were about lean in her touch when the sudden opening of the door makes you react and put yourself between them and the intruders, your eyes light up like a thunder, and sparks run through your fur.

"Idiots! You spooked my daughter" a raven haired woman exclaims pushing through the group of people.

When you see her step in front of you, you try to back off, managing some steps but your back hinds end up against the bed ("am I dead?").

"No my daughter. You are alive" no doubt, Melina has aged since the last time you saw her, but it's been decades maybe. And she barely seems older. She still has that power and commanding aura.

Hesitantly you limp forward again, the electricity and static disappearing from your fur, to rest your wolf forehead on Melina's front, Yelena takes the chance to hug you by the neck. You cherish this little moment, taking in their warmth and smell.

The next day Melina makes you shift back to human form, which you immediately regret screaming in pain while you change, even the experienced Widow cringes at your agony screams, the wolf injuries translate to your human body but is like getting hurt all over again. The Russian is the first one by your side when the shift is over. Your human skin show every single scar. As soon as you feel Melina nearby you pass out again.

When you wake up two days later Natalia is by your side, looking at something on a tablet.

"You should paint it back to blue. It was badass" you say with a smirk. The redhead immediately raises up to hug you and rest her forehead against yours "I missed you sestra".

"I missed you too my solnishko".

Natalia, Natasha she now goes by that name, she lets you know what they are up to. Melina is pretty much commanding the medical wing and nerding hard with Helen and Banner.

Yelena dislocated Wanda's shoulder in your honor. Pietro, Wanda's twin wanted to kill her for it. But Wanda interfered and accepted the eye for an eye.

Now more alert, director Nick Fury and deputy director Maria Hill visit you at the hospital room.Wanting to know what happened.

"I used to serve Madame Hydra. I failed her when Maria, Natasha and Wanda stole the intel. It was my last strike, but her stupid goons couldn't kill me for good".

"What did you do for her?" Nick asks with a stern expression.

"Anything she commanded me too. I was her main bodyguard, fighter, killer, spy. You name it, I did it. I even got into dog fighting pits just for the sake of her entertainment".

After the conversation Maria stayed with you on personal note. She thanked you for helping and saving her. You shook your head and apologized for trying to maul her while in the battle field you stood as enemies.

From there slowly you met the rest of the Avengers team, your favorites to hang out with where the twins. Which after two months of living at the compound were like your little siblings. Which made Yelena a little jealous, but with a tight hug and a kiss on her forehead you assured her that no one could take her place. To make it up to her your time was split between Avenger duty, agent for S.H.I.E.L.D and helping Yelena finding Black Widows to free.

In one of those retrieval missions you end up going back to Melina's farm, since the Widow you rescued was hidden in Mongolia it was quicker and faster to go to the farm.

Melina welcomed you with a hug, it still amazes you how open she has become to showing affection. But is very welcomed.

It didn't took long to meet face to face with Antonia, and you immediately felt her amniosity, and the anger behind her blank expression. It was even more obvious when she hugged Yelena and glared at you. You chose to just silently take her treatment, you can't blame her.

Fury allowed you to stay two weeks on the farm, Melina needed some help building more space for the new ex-Widows. And her farm was expanding. Her beloved pigs were still there, but now she had some cattle, sheeps and chickens that needed better spaces. And Alexei the human, was Alexei... A lot muscle not many braincells.

They were careful to never leave you alone with Antonia and Lerato but, mistakes are bound to happen when Alexei is involved.

This morning Melina and Yelena went to the nearest town for food and basics. While Alexei and you stayed to go on with the new building, you need to hurry ending the rooftop before the snow begins to fall which is tomorrow.

"Y/N! We are out of planks!" Alexei shouts from somewhere down.

You sigh in frustration after securing the last screw on the row to keep this plank in place, you asked him yesterday to buy more but nope. He didn't, he got distracted playing and loosing in chest against his namesake pig.

"Better hurry your ass to get more!" You shout back "I can start the isolation on the part that is ready".

"Got it!" He shouts.

You jump down to go to the other barn for the outdoor isolation sheets. You hoist up the materials and begin working putting all your attention on the task, everything is going as planned until someone tackles you off the roof. When your back meets the hard ground, you realize you are fucked.

When your eyes open you see Antonia getting off you "Get up!" She hisses.

You cough a little bit trying to get air back in your lungs and raise up "Tonia, please. You don't need to do this" her boot greets your face and you groan, you simply roll over with the punch to stand up. Antonia and Lerato that joins her pound on you. You don't want to hurt them, so you do your best at dodging, ducking and moving away from their attacks. But is actually hard to achieve Antonia was the feared Task Master for a reason.

The other Widows try to interfere but you stop them, this very not their problem. After getting way too much damage from the two of them you manage to render Lerato out of the fight hitting central nerve central spots that render her left leg and left arm useless.

And that only makes Antonia angrier. The punch exchange becomes brutal and still you do your best to not hurt her badly. Landing punches your hard enough to slow her down.

Melina with Yelena driving the truck begin to come close to the hardware store "is that papa's truck?" Yelena asks a little unsure, Alexei red truck is not unique but that looks suspiciously like his. And the bed is already loaded with wood planks and other items.

When they stop close they see Alexei walking off the store with more stuff. The three of them lock gazes, the first one to say something is Alexei with a loud and clear "BLYAD!".

From there is a race back to the farm.

When the two vehicles skid to a halt close to the barn they see the escene of Antonia choking you on the floor her hands wrapped around your neck tightly.

Antonia's knee is painfully set on your sternum pressing with a crushing force and the placement is just perfect. Making you proud.

"Tonia-"

"Don't you dare to call me that!" She screams "you were supposed to protect ME! Look how I ended, a toy under my father's command!".

Your eyes get watery you never wanted that for her "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry Tonia".

"How did I survived? I no longer believe Dreykov's tale" her constrictor hold loosens and you gasp for air.

"When the explosion hit... I tried to shield you with my body. But I was on dog size, I could not shift fast enough to shield you completely from the impact...but I got on my biggest wolf size fast enough to shield you from the heaviest debris.

I stood over your unconscious body shielding you for about a week, until you father's agents found us. You were immediately taken to the underground facility with the best care".

"Why weren't you with me?! You left me!" Her voice sounds small and broken. You were her shadow for three years, you kept her safe from harm until that faithful day.

"I didn't left. Dreykov was angry beyond words for my failure. But, he couldn't kill me. After weeks of physical punishment he sold me to Madame Hydra. She brainwashed me for half a decade, when I was normal again Dreykov and the Red Room were out radar. I scaped two years. I did my best to find you, but it wasn't enough".

"Do you regret it? Saving me" she asks.

"No, I don't-"

Your speech is cut off by the onslaught of punches you do your best to cover, many land. Seems like it wasn't the expected answer.

When she grabs you again by the neck, you know you are out of luck. With a lot of effort you rasp what is seems to be your last words "I regret, not being able to save you from him. I'm sorry mor zvezda" her hold falters.

"Do you remember?...The nights I begged you to take me to the roof to see the stars and the full moon? You used to make your claws sparkle.

"The tiny lightings that hit empty cans. You loved that" you smile at the memory, those years guarding Antonia were some of the best. Sure they treat you like a dog, but well she used to hug you a lot. What she didn't know was that all those nights had a price for you but you gladly paid to see her smile freely.

Her hold on your neck tightens again, man you are done for.

A pair of boots halt behind Antonia "What a shit deck we were handed, huh?" Yelena says stopping close to the ex-Task Master "Antonia could you please not kill my sister. I just got her back and she still needs to finish the building" Yelena says with a bored expression "mother won't appreciate you killing her eldest daughter" Yelena's simple request have a warning intention.

Antonia relents and lets you breath again, you cough several times at first with a little blood. She is strong as heck.

"I can't say I'm sorry" the woman says still straddling your chest.

Yours eyes don't leave her "I know. I can't blame you" Antonia got off you and went to pick up Lerato to get back in the house.

Heavier boots halt by your left "Up! Up! That roof won't build itself" Alexei said with a chuckle extending his hand to lift you up "she got you good little pup" he pats your back harshly and laughed as he walked to unload the materials.

After that episode you got back to work, Alexei and you worked on the roof and isolation until 4am, the temperature begun lowering making your bruised bones ache, nothing a couple of vodka bottles couldn't fix.

---

After two weeks in Russia with your family, you came back to U.S where Tony being the billionaire that he is surprised you with an Harley Davidson 2021 iron 883 in deadwood green.

"What do you think sparky claws?" He asks standing behind you.

"Is this for me?" You ask confused, you told them about you escaping some decades ago, you managed to stay away for two years, joined a biker gang for sometime. But your former master found you killed them all and brainwashed you for a while. You still carried the guilt of their deaths, you were even dating a woman at the time she was killed too cruelly in front of you. That's why you never attempted to scape again.

"Why not? Don't you like it?" Tony ask a little worried, maybe he should have bought a crusier one?.

You walk to the machine admiring it, is beautiful, he even bought you a helmet and a badass leather jacket "what can I do to repay you? Is beautiful" you say as your hand delicately glides over the machine.

"You don't have to repay me anything Y/N, you are part of this disfuncional family now" you smile at the man, a little egocentric but, overall he is a good man.

---

You are aware of the gossiping going around the compound "Sexy Romanoff's older sister is fancing the deputy director" which is not that far from the truth.

Maria is a beautiful woman, yes undeniable. But she is also strong, loyal, quick-thinker. She manages to keep this oiled machine going with such a grace. She is a great leader, she wields your sister respect just like Fury, and that is not an easy feat. If your sister is willing to be on their ranks you will too.

--- (F/B)---

You are ending a training session of sparring with Bucky when you see Maria briskly passing outside the glass wall enclosing the gym. She seems stressed.

Bucky chuckles behind you "Go Romeo, Maria has been drowning on paperwork lately. I didn't saw her having breakfast".

You glare at Bucky but nod at his words, you move fast to get a quick shower and get to the common kitchen to cook some breakfast.

After half an hour you have to healthy stacks of home made oat flour hotcakes some with blue berries and others with chocolate chips. Super crispy bacon, chopped fruit and two mugs of salt caramel cappuccino on a insulated lunch box. You are still amazed of all the gadgets and stuff available on the kitchen. You had to ask Pietro if he knew what the hell was that, he had no idea. In the end Friday was the one to enlighten you both.

Reaching the administration wing you tell her secretary you are bringing Maria breakfast, the woman looks surprised but nods and let's you in with a relieved smile. At least Maria is not scaping the first meal.

You knock her door lightly to not startle her, hearing a come in you walk into her office to see quite the stacks of paperwork on her desk.

"Hello Maria, I brought breakfast" you announce with a small smile. She looks at you surprised and a little hesitant. But you have your little ace on hand "come on Hill, you wouldn't say no to a good home made salty caramel cappuccino, will you?" Gently you set the mug on her desk and she smiles "well, who am I to refuse" she carefully take the lid off to take a sip and a can't help the small moan at the good flavor.

At her acceptance you divide the four compartment box and set half on her desk "I hope you enjoy it" you give her a wide small and try to back off.

"Why don't you stay?" She says way too quickly even catching herself off guard.

"Well I didn't wanted to assume. I was going elsewhere. Group breakfast with the rowdy lot is not really my thing".

Maria gives you a crooked smile, you aren't wrong the whole team together can get quite childish "how about a nice calm breakfast here?" She says motioning at her coffee table by the couch.

You blush a little and accept her offer "I would enjoy that very much".

--- (End F/) ---

The next months Maria and you grow closer, working extra hours and going on small undercover missions to find intel.

Sometimes you two meet at cafes, restaurants. Traveling around. It basically feels like you two were dating. Because you were very physical from leaning against her side to sleeping next to her. When you felt her too stressed out you shifted into your wolf form for her to stroke your fur and relax.

Like right now, you two are on her office at the compound, she is sitting on the rug her laptop on the coffee table, her back against the leather couch.

Your wolf head is resting on her legs, she occasionally rubs your ears, making you purr. The first times she thought she was delirious but after the fourth time she was sure, she rubbed your left ear again and you purred "Are you purring?" She ask with a teasing tone.

You grunt a no, making her laugh.

"Aww! You are so cute. Will you shake your leg if I rub your belly?" She says with a teasing tone, you feel her hand skimming through your fur, and you give her a light zap with your powers "hey!" She protests. When her hand reaches your ribs your muscles tense, which doesn't go unnoticed "Are you hurt?" She asks worriedly.

"No" you grunt.

"Volkov shift back to human" she orders and you know better than fight her, you obey. Tony has made several clothing items that shift with you. And this branded S.H.I.E.L.D sweat pants and hoodie are some of those. Maria wastes no time to lift up your hoodie to see the massive darkening bruise covering your left side.

"Y/N! What the hell? When did this happened? is not from your last mission-" she read the report. That means you got hurt helping Yelena, you said nothing and still went on that mission with Natasha and Clint.

You zone out a little, thinking if you should tell her or not. Well, maybe you should.

"-Stay down" you laugh a little at her stern words she frowns as she stand up to retrieve her first aid kit that has a enhanced grade gel for bruising "Volkov this is not funny".

"It is" you argue with goofy grin laying on the rug "when you order me around like that, I feel like a dog that miss behaved".

Maria comes back to your side and you end up in the same position as before. This time she puts the gel, you simply close your eyes and enjoy her gentle touch.

"Don't fall asleep Y/N/N we need to figure out this data".

From that moment, it became a common ocurrence. You searching for Maria to help you tend your wounds, if they were minor. She new that the more concerning they were the more you tried to hid them. She kept a close eye everytime you went to help Yelena. Sometimes as freelance (not that she knows), sometimes to free a Widow.

----

To be honest with yourself you are falling for Maria, hard. And is not a simple crush as Natasha calls it. You feel it in your soul. Everytime you are with Maria you feel at peace, calm, you feel stronger fighting alongside her even in your human form. Nick requested to keep your ability hidden. Since it seems Madame Hydra is still sure you were killed.

You've been thinking about making an actual move with Maria, sure you two have gone together to eat or a coffee but, it has been as friends or co-workers. You wish to change that, you want to date her and call her yours. You are a daughter of Vostokoff, you don't shy away.

Since today is your free day. You ride your recently bought Shelby Mustang in matte black, having a salary from S.H.I.E.L.D and Avenger has its perks and the extra from free-lance even better. You go to town in search for flowers, Wanda offers to give you a hand, Pietro tags along to tease the shit out of you. Definitely they are the annoying little siblings.

You don't go overboard but with some of Wanda's input in the end you have a medium size arengement of violet and white chrysanthemums, white lilies, hybrid pink and white roses in vase. The arrengement is hidden by a simple pearl like white wrapping paper. Like if she says no, well... It can still make a good decoration... Like, um you hope she says yes.

With a slight knock, she grants you entrance and you smile at the sight of her in her reading glasses "Hi Maria" you greet her, by now you know only you and Nick have seen her using those reading glasses. She takes off her glasses and raises an enquiring eyebrow at what you are holding

"Maria Hill, you know I haven't shied away from showing my interest in you. I enjoy being in your company, I cherish your trust dearly. I love your touch and your presence makes me feel calm and safe. Would you grant me the honor of becoming my girlfriend?" You ask gently putting down the arrengement and lowering the wrapping paper showing her the flowers.

Maria's eyes widened as your speech grew, but a beautiful wide smile took over her surprise. She admired the flower arrengement, no doubts you were a sap, a giant soft wolf. Maria extends her right hand inviting you to walk up around her desk to be in front of her. Your heart leaps in anticipation and dread. Like she could throw you off her office window, she is strong as heck too.

She gracefully raises from her desk seat and craddles your face with a gentle touch, her thumbs gently smoothing off the tension. She searchs for deceit in your eyes but she only finds passion and love, anticipation even. She gently pulls in your face towards her and kisses you, shy at first but after a couple of quick pecks she deepens the kiss. Your possesive side doesn't take long to surface and you pull her to you by her hips and yet the kiss is firm and controlled.

Maria is the one backing off to take some air "Is this answer clear enough for you?".

You hum in thought playfully "no, I might need some reaffirmation my lady" Maria jiggles before connecting her lips again with yours.

---

The date was that same night, Natasha helped you booking in a small Italian restaurant, not over fancy. But you gotta admit your sister has a refined taste in food.

Maria was having such fun watching you try the different foods. It has been her small side mission with Nat and Wanda showing you different foods.

"Darling slow down, the waiters are already watching you funny" she takes a sip of her wine glass to hide her smile.

"Have I ate too much?" You ask confused, a ragú lasagna, one pizza, a pasta and salmon carpaccio, two wine bottles... Well now that you recall it might be.

"Yes it is, but fear not. I have a little surprise for you back in my place" she winks playfully and you almost choke on the last piece of pizza earning a good laugh from the blue eyed woman.

"Get you head out of the gutter, Volkov".

Maria ordered several desserts to take back home, to not alarm further the personel of the restaurant.

Now at Maria's place, you ride the elevator hand in hand. You can't help but smile broadly at her "what?" She asks mirroring your smile. Leaning down you kiss her forehead "nothing, just thinking how fucking lucky I am, you said yes".

In her apartment Maria store away the desserts on her fridge. However you couldn't help but walk behind her to wrap your arms over her hips and kiss her exposed neck, that beautiful navy dress made her look like a model, your upper teeth scrapped down her neck "if you aren't ready, tell me to stop darling" Her breath hitches as she turns around to face you but you keep gently assaulting her neck and exposed clavicle with open mouthed kisses "Maria?" You ask after a little while, worried that you crossed a line.

Maria looks at you with a hazzy look "I didn't tell you to stop" she says her fingers grabbing possesively the back of your neck.

"Neither you told me to go on" you say with a teasing smile.

She smiles broadly at you "if I tell you to stop?" She sees the way your pupils impossibly dilated, the eagerness. She just wants to tease you a little.

She sees the surprise in your eyes but you take it calmly "I obey" you lean to kiss her forehead then her cheek. Thinking she is serious.

When you try to step back, Maria pulls you flush to her "you know you are adorable right?"

Now you are confused and your head tilts automatically, Maria laughs again with such a glee, you begin to question all your years of training. Did you read bad the signals? Is your language comprehension bad? The hell is going on?.

"I'm sorry darling, I'm just messing with you".

"You don't want to date me?" You ask even more confused and your body confidence deflates a little.

"No, no, no hey darling not that. I want to be with you. Is just, I was testing how will you respond to me asking you to stop" Maria says in a hurry. Maybe it really wasn't a good idea to tease you like that.

Her worry makes you chuckle "Hill, you are evil. I almost got a heart-attack, thinking I overstepped" your demeanor changes again you push maria against her fridge trapping her with your body "but now? You won't scape" you growl lowly in her ear making her shiver before nibbling her earlobe.

Your hands wander up her back searching for the zipper of her dress, you slowly pull down the zipper, her surprised yelp at the contact of her bare skin with the stainless steel is replaced by a moan when you gently bite on the base of her neck and kiss down the valley between her breasts.

"Take me to bed, now" you didn't have to be told twice.

Now laying on Maria's bed, with her flush to your body is a bliss. Your slightly warmer temperature is enough to keep you both warm. Her face is hidden in your neck, you can feel her soft breaths caressing your skin. Sex with this goddess was an ethereal experience, making you regret calling it sex. You've had sex, empty physical act. This? Was beyond what words can describe, this was so human, so real, electrifying beyond your powers.

Eyeing the clock behind Maria on the beside table 3:34 am, your fingertips gently run along her back mapping the scars on her skin, not as many as you have, but the few you find makes you a little angry, who dares to hurt such an amazing and beautiful woman. You bow to keep her safe as much as you can.

"I can feel you overthinking" she groggily says kissing your neck softly, you hum happily, her lips on your skin is the best thing ever.

"How can I overthink, if the only thing my mind can't even process is how good your body feels against mine" you open palm replaces your fingertips gently running up and down Maria's back.

"Hmm I can agree on that darling, you feel so warm. I like this, being in your arms".

----

After a generous hearty breakfast at Maria's place. Both rode your car to the compound, being the gentle woman you are, after parking you exited the car to open the door for Maria, she smiled at your gesture and you kissed her knuckles. The two of you avoided the PDA but, you walked her to her office half way there Steve intercepted you "Volkov, all-hands-on-deck. Wheels up in ten minutes" he says passing with a light jog.

"Yes, sir" when he is out of earshot you look at Maria, for a fact you know she wishes to keep this private from the rest of the troops

Maria gives you a friendly hug instead "be careful, ok?" You hug her too "always".

Even though the mission required the whole team, it wasn't as hard as everyone was anticipating. You had the chance to fight side by side with Natasha, and you can't help but admire her. You saw her as a little kid, you even trained her. She always had a roaring fire inside her. But now fighting side by side with her, finally fighting for good cause. It makes you happy. For a fact you know that if you were in your wolf form you'll be wagging your tail.

---

The next two years are easily and by far the best of your existence. Maria is such an amazing partner, lover, friend and confident. She even got Melina's and Alexei's approval, she got the shovel talk though. Melina treathened her to turn her in one of test subjects if she breaks your heart and Alexei treathened her to feed her to the cows... That doesn't work at all but is Alexei.

Natasha's shovel talk was standard she trusts Maria to not break your heart.

Yelena, was Yelena to say the least "you break her heart, your short lifespan will be dragged with pain and suffering. You better not find out".

Date nights just lounging on the couch with wine and movies. Check.

Fancy date nights, hell yes. Maria's outfits were worth it. She looked like a goddess walking among peasants, you looked like a idiot drooling by her side.

Missions together? That's a big yes. Badass duo kicking major ass. You two even got into a undercover mission with you posing as her service dog. Which was fun, you had to get your fur tainted in greyish-brown and scars hidden, Helen and Banner had to come up with contact lens to disguise your white eyes to bright yellow. What you didn't enjoyed was using a collar with tag, the service harness was comfortable at least. You even bite one of the guys ankle for giving Maria dirty looks. The good thing of that mission was the public PDA, like ear rubs were heavenly, she used the excuse of service dog to constantly stroke the fur on your back. And it has been the two months were your fur coat has been on its best care.

--- (F/B) ---

You are laying on the rug of the rented apartment where Maria and you are staying, she is helping you brush your fur after a bath. Your back leg shakes when she brushes right over your ribcage making her laugh for your dismay, but you can't help it is reflex.

"Okay, we are done. Ready to look magestic tomorrow" she says patting your belly. You quickly shift back to human but you are bare ass naked.

"We eat now?" You ask, you are fucking starving. Keeping your body on large dog size takes a lot of energy and control.

"Our lovely elderly neighbor bought some nice kibble for you 42% salmon protein" she says with a teasing tone, but unfortunately is true... on wolf form you have no issue eating it. Like back in Hydra they used to give you shitty kibble or cheap almost rotten meat.

"Y/N! Don't even think about it. I made you some nice giant meatloaf".

---- (End F/B) g--

With Nick you have earnt his trust completely, he sees Maria as a daughter. He gave you a warning, borderline shovel talk. That man is terrifying when his eye sets blankly and sternly on you, you gotta admit that. But he is happy to see Maria thriving with you by her side. You even help her with paperwork and bureaucracy stuff to help her have some more free time.

This afternoon Maria and you are enjoying the sunset in Central Park, you calmly smoke a cigar while Maria reads a book. You see a family with kids and a dog, the canine seems to be too curious about you surely he senses the wolf in you, having nothing better to do you choose to mess with him and glare at it. The dog gets nervous before glaring at you and Maria chatises you "Y/N stop reeling up the poor dog".

"I did no such thing" you say in your defense.

"Yes you did" she says leaving down her book to raise a daring eyebrow.

"I-"

"Excuse me?" A little voice says behind you, a kid. You quickly turn around to see a girl that must be five at most.

"Can you help me find my mom? I got distracted and lost her" she says calmly, but you can hear her heartbeat, she is obviously nervous and terrified.

"Hi sweetie, I sure can" you answer looking at Maria that nods, you stand up slowly to not scare her, you are slightly taller than Maria, more built and you have scars in your face. You usually scare kids and dogs alike.

Maria and you split up, the kid stays with you. It takes you a couple of hours find her mom, well... More like the police found you. They tried to take the kid away. You didn't let them, you trust no police.

Another kid tried to interfere to vouch for you. Well not a kid, kid. She might be on her early twenties. The police tried to shut her up , you talked back. You tried to keep civil but unfortunately you have a temper out of nowhere the officers tried to wrestle you down and a fight broke out, this young woman managed to get the kid to be safe by her side. You were wrestled down to the floor by ten officers. And before anything scaleted further. Luckily this new kid mom stepped in, she seems to hold some authority. And half the officers eased back. So while you were still being held on the ground the woman had the little kid by her side and no police officer dared to tell her otherwise.

Maria heard the commotion, and since you weren't answering your phone she ran in with the kid's mom and saved you from being tazered. Turns out the kid was lost for almost half a day on the park, the mom thought the worse, and the police were on edge. The scars on your face and overall demeanor didn't helped your initial innosence plea.

Your girlfriend in her best authority persona played her Avenger Deputy Director credential which granted you an immediate release with an apology included.

"I will suggest you don't dare to tazer my agent" Maria's authoritative voice make you sigh in relief, and she quickly strolled close.

"Hello boss, would you mind? My hands are getting beyond numb" you say with your face being pressed heavily against the floor. Two officers holding down your head.

"Who the hell you think you are?!" One police officers shouted. And a knee was digged deeper between your shoulder blades painfully pressing on your spine, making you groan "duuude you are digging to deep, you fucking asshole!" You tried to wiggle them away but they pressed further.

"Deputy Director of the Avengers organization, commander Maria Hill" the officers looked at each other in panic "I highly suggest you to release my agent immediately".

They quickly eased the pressure and the tazer was tucked away.

"Fucking finally, you bunch of assholes" you greeted your teeth and kneeled ok the concrete moving your neck and shoulders trying to regain the feel on them.

You were very tempted to kick their sorry asses. But a pointed look from Maria made you think it twice.

The little kid mom was utterly embarrassed by what happened, you did your best to ease her mind. Like she wasn't at fault. You hugged the little kid goodbye.

You rub your swrists trying to make blood run back faster. The police and bystanders disperse and you look for the other woman and kid that helped you. Luckily the woman seemed to read your mind and she walked close after ending her chat with a captain of the police.

"Ma'am, thank you for your help" you say offering your hand. If you werent tazered or punched harsher was thanks to her. She shakes your hand warmly "Eleanor Bishop, from Bishop Security. it was the least I could do. You were helping out a little kid".

"Hi! My name is Kate Bishop, I'm pretty surprised you didn't kicked their asses!" The dark haired young woman said way too loud.

"Kate!" Eleanor chatises her daughter and you laugh waving off her mother's concern.

"I'm Y/N Volkov. Well, if I were to do that, it would mean A LOT for paper work for my direct boss" you say smirking at Maria, the woman shakes her head in amusement "Maria Hill".

Your brain catches a little fact "Wait a second, you are the Bishop kid. The one that is called the best Archer in the world, am I right?"

Kate blushes deeply and gets shy which kind of answers your question.

"I- umm- yes I am. I don't think I'm better than Clint Barton though.

"Would you like to put that theory into test? Clint will be down to it" you say it an teasing smirk. Clint will love that. Pietro has been giving him shit about it.

"You know Clint? Are you an Avenger too? Do you have powers? Are you a fighter too?" Kate asks looking at you with a wide hopeful smile.

"I... Yes, not really I fight alongside them, nope, yes. I answered them all, right? How about you go this weekend to the compound and get to meet the team?"

Kate's face light up like a kid on candy land "oh yes!!!" Her enthusiasm is notched down by her mother's stern gaze "I mean, yeah, yeah I would like that very much" she says much calmer but her heartbeat tells you how excited and nervous she is.

After some more chatting, and getting the small little fact Kate doesn't drive yet. You offer up to take her to the compound and back home.

When you and Maria are walking to your car, the blue eyed woman can't help but look at you with heart-eyes "Have you thought about it? Having kids?" She asks softly.

You look at her "well, I don't see myself getting pregnant. Maybe adopt? Would you like having kids?".

"You are good with the kids Y/N. I never thought of myself as mom material, getting pregnant is not on my soon to be list. Earth's safety takes up too much time and you are a handful" she smirks playfully at you.

"Me?" You say with an utterly offended face "Not my fault my face doesn't scream friendly, my scars make me look like a tug I will admit-" Matia cuts your rant with her lips and you smile on her lips "what about no PDA Hill?"

"Shut up".

---

A couple of months later what you truly didn't anticipated was Yelena and Kate getting close, closer than what would you like. But, by the other hand. Kate is a good kid, might be over hyper-verbal, drives Yelena nuts most of the time and the whole Avengers team too. A good kid overall. And she has been training with you all, specially Natasha on her words "if she will date our little sister, she better be capable of defending herself".

Currently the twins are using you as their giant pillow on the common room. They love cuddling with you in your wolf shape.

Your head is resting on Wanda's lap as she absentmindedly strokes your fur, Pietro is using your stomach as pillow, they are watching some t.v shows. You don't really understand them but they love it.

Maria walks in "sorry to interrupt guys, Y/N. Can we have a word?".

You nod your head but Pietro doesn't move, you playfully lick him on his cheek and ear making him laugh "ok, ok, I move".

("Can I dress, meet you in your office?").

("Is actually an off record thing") she says giving a side glance at the twins, it doesn't took Maria long to figure out she could telepathically answer you in your wolf form.

("Let's go to our room then").

Now dressed in your shared room Maria asks you what do you know about Madripoor and Valentina de la Fountain, at the mention of the woman you immediately go to fetch the vodka bottle you have there "that's a thread you don't wish to pull Hill".

Maria crosses her arms and half seats on your desk "She has been recruiting Black Widows. She uses them to manipulate governments and business men at her will. She is dangerous".

"Do you know that, to win a war. You must decimate the enemies army before cutting off the head?".

"What does that saying has to do with this?" You see the clear confusion on her eyes, you can't blame her. You are pretty sure the only one knowing the actual truth is Nick.

"Condessa Valentina de la Fountain is Madame Hydra, the actual Hydra boss, the very top head. Everyone else is just a front. Madripoor is her recluting place. The front face there is Power Broker since a few years ago, maybe half a decade" you take a cigar from your stash and cut it up to light it up, taking a couple of drags. By now Maria knows that you smoke because you are relaxed or if you are worried as heck.

"I'm very worried about your enquirement Hill. Those threads..."

Maria stands up to stand in front of you she threads her fingers through your hair trying to make you relax "flag-smashers" she says handing you the file she had on her hand.

"Sounds like a rap group" you deadpan making maria laugh you begin to scan the data, terrorists: they steal vaccines and medicines to give to refugees... does that make them terrorists? Seriously?... You get to the pictures, well no faces, only masks "I truly don't see this group of kids related to Madame Hydra.

The raven haired woman hums and sets a tablet on your desk. You put play on the standing video, at first you see no odd... Until you see one ripping off the door of the trailer bare-handed and other kicking the shit out of one cop to the other side of the street.

"Supersoldiers?".

"This is still out of radar. James thinks the answer could be in Madripoor. But we need a way in".

"I can do it".

Turns out you had to use Baron Zemo, in exchange for two dacades to lessen his sentence. He tried to tear the Avengers apart before you joined them but, luckily Tony saw through the manipulation and made up victims.

Zemo is your way in and out of Madripoor. James and Sam came too, the latter is quite nervous, which makes you laugh. After what he went through in the army he is nervous about this. You now go by the code name of Mauler.

The bar stunt is a disaster, suspiciously Sharon is there to back you up and save your ass. She acts uninterested about flag-smashers. Seemingly she is here on a undercover mission posing as art dealer... But your years tell you there's more behind or under. No way Carter is here without Madame Hydra knowing.

And you weren't wrong, after Sharon guided you to the scientist and Zemo blew up everything, the guy was killed. It was a disaster but within the hidden lab you found a kid.

You shield her with your body from a explosion. The freight made her shift into a wolf pup... Wolf pup?! She tried to run away but you catched her, she bit your forearm hard but you didn't budge "Hey sweetie is ok, I'm just like you. Ok?" The pup stops biting and tilts her head in curiosity.

"Yes I am" the rush of more bullets force you to shift into your standard size wolf form ("see? I'll keep you safe. I promise").

You shift back to human and the kid/pup relaxes in your arms.

The fight to get out of there is disastrous to say the least. The lack of uniforms tells you is not Madame Hydra, she most likely not here.

Seeing how Sharon comes on and off your suspicious get bigger. Something is off, she insists on you giving her the kid which you refuse.

Half way into scaping more shooters, this time better than the ones at the beginning "Hey sweetie, I need you to go with Sam, ok? I'll be right behind you keeping you safe" the pup nods.

"Sam!" You hand the pup to him.

And shift back into your standard wolf form ("James, she is like me. Say nothing, take her back to the compound. Tell Maria what happened").

("What about you?!") He glares at you.

("I can get out on my own. Go! Don't let Zemo scape").

---

You fought your way out in human shape, you only shifted briefly to give orders to James. Of course Sharon, your main suspect fooled you in and captured you.

In the basement of her mansion she shocked you to the point of making you shift into wolf form.

"Grom Volk" your former master still laments her decision of killing you.

("Madame Hydra you meant").

("What is this bout Sharon? World domination? Just as pathetic as any Hydra head before. Revenge?").

"Being the good guy doesn't leave you with a lot of money. You should know".

You shift back into human "Yeah, no lies about that" Sharon has the decency to hurl a blanket at you.

"So, Flag-Smashers. You personal little army? Seems they got out of leash".

"They know my face. A liability".

You crack your neck and move around your shoulders. It was a good fight. Until Sharon ran you over with her nice car. Groaning you shift to seat cross legged with the blanket covering your low parts.

"The pup? What the hell where you doing with her".

"I call my innocence on that Volkov, I didn't know he had her. I seriously thought it was a dog".

Pinching the bridge of your nose you think your options "tell you what. I keep the pup, she is off all this-"

"No super soldiers, no shifter. So just like that I am left empty handed? I can't let them run around knowing who I am, the Carter name-"

"I help you deal with them. The pup is off limits, I'll be your on call executioner. Just keep who I really am our little dirty secret, just like I'll keep yours Power Broker".

---

One thing is the arrangement you and Sharon reached after a lot of discussion. Other thing is Madame Hydra coming into play unexpectedly and with her own blondie super soldier boy.

And what a good fight he put up. Luckily he and his sidekick are way too hot-headed and cocky. You fooled them easily and stole their jet. Valentina still sent executioners to terminate your stolen jet, and they shoot it down. The last thing the recorded was the exploding aircraft.

---

"Barnes! Wilson! What do you mean you left Volkov in Madripoor!" Maria shouts as she briskily walk up to Sam's truck. The kid, Aileen is her name got scared and shifted back to wolf pup again, which didn't go unnoticed by Maria. At the sight, her anger simmered... Now she gets it... Damned you.

James takes the fraightened pup on his arms and jumps down the vehicle.

"What the heck I'm gonna do with Y/N?" She sighed pinching the bridge of her nose.

The pup wiggled to be let down which Bucky hesitantly did, luckily the pup just went ahead and hesitantly sniffed around the Deputy Director, her tail begun to wag nervously at first then happily.

Maria crunched down and offered her hand, hey sweetie "I'm sorry for scaring you".

("Is ok, are you with big wolf. You have her smell on you") the kid asks making Maria chuckle at her quick thinking.

("Yes, I am her girlfriend. What is your name?") Maria asks mentally "Barnes do you have a blanket?"

Sam gives a soft smile handing over a blanket. They had to keep one close, the poor girl tends to easily be spooked and shifts constantly to wolf pup.

----

A week later Yelena, Alexei and Antonia rescue your sorry ass from Batam. You were washed to the shore, the language impediment was a nightmare. Luckily after two days drying your cellphone on rice, yes that old school trick. The elderly couple that found you gave you a charger compatible and you could call your extraction team.

Yelena laughs her ass off at the sight of you, left shoulder is on a makeshift swing, you have a huge gash on the side of your head, cuts and bruises all over. And overall you look miserable. You are hungry, in pain and pissed as heck.

Of course the elderly couple offered you food, and you are greatful. But is barely enough to keep you awake, your wounds can't heal quickly without proper amount of food and that was way more than what the couple could offer.

Yelena, gave the elderly couple a good amount of money for helping you out. You took the time to help them doing some improvements on their house while they arrived.

Ten fucking long days since the Madripoor fiasco, the aircraft lands on the Avengers tarmac. And you sigh in relief, which is cut short when you see Maria's pissed as fuck face.

"How about we go to mama's farm? you can still call wheels up" you say to your papa who chuckles "Huh, huh, huh woman up. Your wife requested your sister to bring your ass immediately".

Antonia, the little shit opened the door for Alexei to push you off, you simply got along landing and regretting it when your shoulder throbbed in pain.

"Sent her on a ash box Hill, takes less space" Alexei shouts before sliding shut the door as Yelena immediately takes off "traitors" you growl.

When you turn around you are face to face with commander Hill. Before you can utter an apology she slaps you HARD, the agents around and your sister standing a few feet behind hiss in mockery.

Your offended face is priceless "what was that for?!" You shout at your woman.

"For playing idiot. Idiot!" Maria shouts, she suddenly grabs you by the face and harshly pulls you in for a KISS. Your initial surprise vanishes and you grab the back of her neck pulling her impossibly closer, getting possesive.

When the lack of air becomes too much you pry away "that is what I was hoping... Now the whole troop know" you wiggle your eyebrows playfully but the cut on the left side begins to bleed and your stomach growls in hunger.

"Let's get you tended and fed".

---

Aileen the kid was so happy to see you, she jumped in your arms and hid her face on your neck "thank you for saving me". You smiled at her warmly, wrapping your right arm around her, the left was out of commission.

You saw the way Maria looked at your interaction closely with a warm grin. She later told you Aileen has been living under her care. The kid only knows her name, she thinks, knows she is six. Have no idea if she has parents. But after a DNA test, what you suspected came true, she is kind of your minemee, but her wolf form fur is a lighter shade of grey and grey-ish eyes. And your main suspect is Valentina, that woman. One day you will rip her throat off.

Aileen was such a sweet, easy kid. Of course the first month the Intel team tried to locate her parents, suspecting it was a kidnapped kid that got her DNA modified somehow with yours. But none.

A month with the kid was a little challenging, mostly due to the schedules. But the whole Avengers team stepped in even the Bishop kid, that is earning auntie points with the pup for Yelena's dismay.

Maria and you are lazyly enjoying the after sex bliss, Yelena, Kate as Wanda offered to take care of Aileen to give you and Hill alone time. But still in alone time your bedroom has the prints of the kid, her blanket on the lounge chair, her teddy plush bear on the vanity. And the middle of the bed smells like her, she usually asks you two to sleep between you.

"We should adopt her officially" Maria says as her short finger nails graze up and down your abs.

"What?" You groggily ask, her caresses were lulling you back to sleep.

Maria raises leaning on her right forearm "Aileen, she is such a big part of us now. We should adopt her, to be our daughter" you look up at her with a smile "So, Maria Hill are you asking me to start a bigger family with you?" Maria grins before leaning down to kiss you "is that a yes?" She enquires on your lips before tugging your lower lip playfully.

"Stay here, please" you say before quickly jumping off the bed to get into Aileen's room, yes it already was her room, now it will officially be hers.

"Volkov! Is a little late for the walk of shame!" Maria shouts playfully making you laugh, while you search for the item.

When you return Maria is giving appreciating looks, loving how your muscles move "yes off the meat Hill" you say with a teasing tone, left hand is hidden behind your back you extend your right hand helping her seat on the edge of the bed.

"Maria Hill, my love" you get in one knee "I know it might not be the ideal context. But this moment feels so ought to be. You are my greatest love, my port, my shelter, my strength and my inspiration to become the best version of me. You command my heart with such a brave and kind leadership. I don't wish for anyone else but YOU to call me theirs. You took me in and love me for who I am, forgave me for who I was. In you I found a sincere love, I met a gentle loving touch, thanks to you I know how high voltage can love be when your bare skin glades on mine" you kiss her knuckles softly "will you do me the greatest honor to become my wife and be the mommy of our child?".

Maria's tears begun to run freely since the first half of your speech and yet her smile was the most precious thing you've ever witnessed. You enjoy the several beats that she stays silent, no doubt se will says yes, she just needs to process.

"Will you recite such poetry to me?" She says with a smile smile.

"Every day if my queen wishes me to" you say kissing her knuckles again.

"I've had no doubt in my mind that you are the only one for me Y/N Volkov" Maria's hand shake as you put the beautiful diamond ring on her finger, she leans in while you put the ring to kiss your forehead and you swoon in happiness.

From there it was several rounds of electrifying sex, you loved how her ring grazed your skin with her caresses.

---

The next morning you two went to the Avengers compound, her ring was now on a necklace hidden under her clothes. You hoped it stayed like that. But Kate having an actual keen hawk eye didn't took long to see the glint of the ring. And the dopey idiots grin you two had weren't unnoticed by your sisters.

"Sestra what is with that idiot grins on your faces?" Yelena straight forward asked.

"Yelena said a bad word!" Aileen said with glee "pay up! Up!" She extended her tiny hand to the blonde who grumpily gave the kid a dollar bill.

Wanda, the little shit just grinned "Maria is that a new necklace?" Maria glared at the Sokovian mind reader.

Natasha eyes you suspiciously and her eyes rack you up and down searching, you casually showed her your ring less fingers. Well you had a couple, but they were your usual black Damascus thumb rings and the wolf head in your index that Kate gifted you with a "I saw it, thought it was badass and you are kind of a wolf too, so" she whispered the last before giving it to you.

When your redhead sister found nothing on you she looked at Maria at the same time Wanda asked her about the necklace.

"I don't know what you are talking about Maximoff" Maria defended.

"You know I can read minds, right?" The twins shared a complicity look, damned Wanda she told Pietro already.

Pietro flashed you his best mischievous smirk before opening his big mouth "I bet the celebration got wild, right Y/N/N?".

Yelena shared a look with Kate who expressed her thoughts whispering in her ear, her surprised face was comedy worth it "Wait a second. Idiot grins plastered in your faces, you asked us to babysit the kid, take this kid. I'm about to say more" Yelena gave Aileen a 20 bill "You fucking idiots got engaged!".

You groan in annoyance, idiots, you live with worldclass idiots. You can't hide shit like this from spies, assassins, two idiots and a mind reader.

Maria only shakes her head and shows off the ring on her military tags necklace.

"Congrats idiots. Like you could hide that from us" Natasha said with her damned loopsided smirk.

"pay up auntie Nat!".

---

The wedding itself was small and private. Nick, the Avengers team, your Russian family, Antonia with her now officially girlfriend Lerato, Kate and her mom. Of course Aileen was there.

You two were meaning to adopt Aileen right away but, you two decided to give Aileen the chance to choose. All the Avengers loved and cared for the kid. She obviously had an inclination to be with Maria and you. But you don't wished to impose.

However life rolled around, missions came and go. Things with Flag-Smashers scaleted, which you needed and predicted. You couldn't erase them while they were seen as heroes, a martyr is not easy to erase.

But it didn't took more than eight months for their will to falter under the public pressure of being the heroes. Sharon did her part reeling Morguenthau and Valentina did her part with his blonde excuse of super soldier.

You had to be very careful on this volatile chess game. But even with all the work and missions you three, Maria, Aileen and you became closer. A small tight family, you personally trained the kid to control her powers and taught her fighting skills to defend herself.

Maria found adorable seeing you two in wolf shape, sometimes training, sometimes just hanging around specially in full moon, others just cuddling. Of course Hill did her best at being a mom, agent and directive. Aileen had no issue hanging out with her at her office.

As things scalated, your rivalry with Karli got worse.

The international organization begun pressuring the Flag-Smashers pushing Karli to get violent, showing off their power. Her last stunt was way too public and costed a lot of lives.

Nick turn off the t.v of his office "we are close to have them were you suggested".

"I don't like this Nick. But that Blondie soldier fucked up everything".

"Sam and James were so close" Nick half laments.

Your cellphone rings showing the logo of Flag-Smashers you raise your eyebrow and answer *What do you want Morguenthau?* You put the speaker on.

*Grom Volk, you better not get on my way. It would be a shame for your pup to get hurt*

Your jaw tightens in anger *Karli, Karli. You aren't one to threaten me. And I suggest you don't even try to mess with my pack. I know no mercy*.

*Stop getting in the middle of my plans then. Your deal with Power Broker-*

*Still stands, surrender Karli. We can work this out. You are one step from no return. You used to be better than a simple terrorist*.

---

Karli didn't listened, too young and confused. The submit was a disaster. Not only the remaining Flag-Smashers, Valentina's people got on the mix. The whole Avengers team went in even Yelena and Kate that didn't listened to stay off.

You went in to get your part of the deal done, while Aileen stayed safe by Nick's and Maria's side at the compound.

"Morgenthau!" You shout as you run up to her, she already scaped Sam's last try to stop her. By her recent stunt you know she is far too gone.

You get into a fight with her, but the last person you needed comes in, Walker. The asshole teams up with Morgenthau against you.

"I'm SO fucking done with you dude" you throw a punch fully charged making him fly off the building.

Karli got her hand in another handgun, the two of you stand face to face guns drawn on each other.

You let a breathy chuckle, Karli empties her magazine on you and you simply built up high voltage static to reduce the bullets to dust "Poor thing. Never, ever threaten a family of someone than can be merciless kid" you fire several shots, the silencer on your gun barely makes any sound. The young woman falls on the floor and begins to drag herself away from you, Sharon walks from behind you.

"She is Power Broker!" The kid tries her last card.

"Tell me something I didn't know" you say with a shrug.

Sharon looks at you then at the panicked kid "We have a deal Grom Volk" you nod and holster back the untraceable gun to grab your usual one "and a deal we have" you fire a last shot on her chest.

"What about Walker?" Carter asks looking the last breath leave the kid "such a shame".

"We had a deal Volkov".

"Present time Sharon".

"Steve insisted in arresting the others soldiers" she points out grimacing at the pain on the gun shot she got courtesy of Karli.

You nod holstering back your gun "I have that covered. Before you are in your nice penthouse, the job will be done".

"You have open pass to the compound. No one but Nick and I know your alter ego" you point at her gun shot wound.

She nods *Volkov, I heard gun shots. Do you have Karli?*

*She is dead cap. She shot Agent 13*

---

Everything goes hitch less when the police was taking the captured super soldier to custody the next day vehicle exploded, terminated them. It wasn't your doing per se. But you gave Baron Zemo the means.

You were with Sharon on her hospital room at the compound when the news were talking about the assesination.

"Impressive, I take our friend in common had his hand on this?".

You simply nod, Sharon gives you a friendly smile and offers you her hand to shake "word for a word Grom Volk".

----

The next years you were truth to your word. You were an executioner for Power Broker. Luckily Sharon, listened and her path to world domination was casted aside for money and power. Fury was up to date on everything, feeling a little at ease knowing Madripoor was mostly under Carter's control.

Aileen truly thrives with your's and Hill's care, as soon as she had full control on her shifting abilities she started school. And man the kid was brilliant.

The kid became a Volkov-Hill a couple of months after the Flag-Smashers were terminated. Tony and Pepper got everything arrenged and the sign of papers was at the compound.

Lee like you all call her now was super excited, she was shy to call you mama and Maria mom, but now that it was official she couldn't stop calling you both her moms.

Yelena, Natasha and the Maximoffs were already her aunts and uncles. Kate chocked in feels when Lee called her aunt too since she was officially Yelena's girlfriend.

Hate to admit the kid was a prodigy at fighting, keen senses, inhuman reflexes of course. She was absolutely good in everything sports and training related. Just for the sake of her being safe, you and Maria trained her. At ten she knew how to fire weapons and identify danger.

Her wolf form was big, she was almost three quarters your size at ten. Her thunder powers were powerful enough to zap the actual god of thunder at just ten years old.

But even with all the craziness around she was a kid. She was sweet, but hot-headed at times. Stubborn as heck and Kate's and Yelena's influence didn't helped much on that field but, Maria and you wouldn't change that for anything. You love your kid as she is.

What was quite surprising for everyone was first: Natasha and James end up rekindling their relationship, especially after a mission they found a baby that turned out to be born from their genetics. They named him Steve, Stevie as everyone calls him. Aileen was eight when this happened and she loved his cousin dearly.

Turns out that laboratory where Stevie was found had several genetic material from your Widow sisters, which made you angry as heck. They sterilezed them but kept their genetics for their wicked ends. You were about to go all war mode when Maria and Nick calmed you down.

Second was that even when they had quite the rocky relationship, not because lack of love. It was jus that Kate and Yelena had such strong personalities that they tended to clash, hard. But they loved each other dearly. When Aileen was ten, Stevie two. Kate decided to surprise Yelena.

And what a surprise, she begged Helen and Banner for help and she managed to conceive a baby, half Yelena and half her. In Yelena's words it was the best birthday present she ever had.

A very worried Eleanor Bishop called you to meet her at Bishop Security. Kate is already an active Avenger and now she is pregnant and mama Bishop was beyond worried, happy but, worried for her daughter and granddaughter safety.

"Mrs. Bishop, I can assure you. No one will ever hurt your daughter, not easily that is. My little sister loves your daughter to death. And I consider her my family too. I give you my word".

The woman smiles greatfuly at you but her face turns pensive and a little sour as she takes a sip of her own drink. "Do you think I did wrong? Letting her follow her Avenger dream?" The woman wondered outloud "I'm not getting any younger, and this company, it was meant to be Kate's".

You offer her a little time taking a drag of the cigar in your right hand as you swirl the offered vodka with your left.

"Your daughter is one of the best agents I've worked with, as quick thinker as her mouth-" Eleanor guffaws at your comment, she tries to hide her wide grin behind her hand, you only grin and take another drag of the cigar

"In all seriousness, she is really good and keeps improving, compassionate. She now carries the Hawkeye mantle. IT wasn't a mistake, she loves her job... If you are worried for the company future. Fear not, Kate is very aware that someday she will own and direct this. This is her legacy too".

"In the mean time if you ever need help Yelena and I wouldn't mind a couple of extra coins" your crooked grin makes the woman snort again.

"You Russians, all business".

---

How much you wish to sometimes just follow your gut and kill your enemies when you can.

A very worried Kate just called you telling you that Walker is stalking them, she is six months pregnant now and she has Aileen and Stevie with her. You told her to stay calm but keep aware. They were supposed to be having a fun and relaxed day in central park. Earlier, Mrs. Bishop took your word from the conversation a couple of months ago and requested your input for some jobs the company was taking.

Luckily you were already close when Kate's call came through your earbud, you give all the speed to your bike, you just skid to a halt the closest to were Kate and the Rugrats are. You run the rest of the way to intercept the now called US Agent. Maria is already sending backup.

"Walker!" You shout putting yourself between him and Kate.

"Grom Volk the Mauler" he says with a smirk "I come with a message, surrender your pup. And she keeps hers" the blonde quickly draws his gun on Kate and you literally growl at him.

"Oh? Did I made the dog mad?" He tauntingly says. With your experienced years and refined senses you hear the actual amount of agents he has, and knowing De la Fountain... Is gonna be a shit show.

"Is your mouth big only because of your backup? Last time you weren't that cocky".

You take off your cellphone, necklace, bike keys and hand it to your daughter, her hand shakily takes the items. Last but no least you give her your handgun "do not engage, got it?" You dare a glance back and the kid nods as she ties the holster to her hip.

You shift into your standard wolf white eyes sparkling dangerously. You hear Kate's collapsible bow setting in.

("KATE NO").

("KATE YES") she answers in your mind you look at her walking up to be standing beside you with a cheeky smile and arrow ready and pointed at a target behind Walker.

You growl at her in annoyance ("I give you an open, you and the kids run") you see hesitation in her eyes ("do it for your unborn baby and Yelena, please") she nods finally but she is still ready to fight.

("Aileen grab Stevie") luckily your daughter doesn't hesitate to obey, Stevie clings to her like a little monkey, you can smell the fear emanating from him and you feel awful, no kid should go through this.

The fight brakes out, and you manipulate the electricity and static beyond your body to keep them all safe. You know how accurate and good Kate is, so you keep your attention on Walker and the other agents daring to come too close.

Bullets do nothing to you and Walker gets into close combat, you claw at him several times. A couple of agents try to sneak behind John's attacks to grab your daughter. But you ram them away with your body fully charged ("Run! Now").

You keep between the attackers and your family when you are close to Kate's BMW SUV a bullet wheezes past you but you fry it before it hits Kate. Immediately you turn around and protect then with a static bubble, you dart your eyes and ears around to locate the sniper ("eleven o'clock, third floor").

("I can't hit it, is too far") you nod and begin to gather energy.

("I'll fry them up close, and shield you with my biggest form. Run to your vehicle and drive away. I'll be right behind you").

It goes as planned, you shield them with your biggest shape, as they run you but in the frenzy you lost Walker.

By pure reflex you saw the glinting of a knife and the scream from Aileen alerted you of the danger way too close to them.

When walker tried to swing his hunting knife at Kate's front. You jumped in tackling him off. On the rolling away he latched to your fur and blindly stabbed you on the belly. You growled and zapped him away. A vehicle tried to crash against the BMW but you jumped in and crashed your body against it before. Kate took the chance and revived the engine to drive away.

You tried to jump up to the roof of the car but Walker pounced on your back stabbing you on the back in the start of your upper back barely missing your spine by two inches, his falling body end up slashing all the way along your back. This time you growled in agony loosing your grip on the vehicle, as both of you fell off the BMW you let off a massive discharge that even knocked you out briefly on the asphalt. Luckily Kate put themselves first and drove away.

The sound of screeching tires woke you up. You saw Walker on the floor, no heartbeat. Raising up was a challenge, with blurry eyes you saw Kate's retreating vehicle, but two other non shield vans got right behind them. No time to lick your wounds. You tumbled a little but you raised up to get rid of the vehicles.

You had to be careful to not cause civilian fatalities which earnt you several wounds: a vehicle running over you, a bus impacted you and a couple of gunshots. But in the end you scorted Kate's vehicle along other two shield SUVs up to the compound.

Steve, Natasha, Bucky, Sam and Pietro took care of the remaining attackers in central park and along the way. Your sister wired the motorcycle to use it.

As the small convoy reached the compound you begun to shrink back to your usual size. Maria was right by the main lobby waiting for you all with a medical team. Kate called her on the way and told her what she could see.

With wobbly legs you made it to the lobby and collapsed belly down. It has been a long time since you fought in wolf shape and used your powers like that.

Maria had a hard time keeping up her profesional persona. She prioritized your daughter, Kate's and Stevie's wellbeing, making sure they were fine before going to your side.

But Aileen had other plans as soon as Stevie was in Maria's arms and handed her the items you give her, she shifted to hurry to go to your side and nuzzle against you licking your face worriedly. You did your best to rub your muzzle against her to apeace her.

The medical team lowered an stretcher by your left side, with a last ditch of effort you raised barely enough to collapse on the stretcher sighing in relief at the comfyness.

Maria finally came by your side "is ok Y/N. They will take good care of you" you noded and licked her hand before the medical team rolled you away.

---

Four hours later Yelena's aircraft landed on the tarmac, she simply strolled in, in search of her wife. She found her with her mother Eleanor by her side. Kate seeing her panicked state behind the guarded look, she raised up and let Yelena have a good look at her.

"Thank God. You okey?" Yelena says craddling her wife face gently pulling her down to kiss her forehead. On the side Eleanor just smiled at the sight, she might not always see eye to eye with the blonde Widow but, there's no doubt her daughter is loved.

"My sestra, where is she?" Yelena asked looking around in a borderline frantic way.

Maria was walking in when she heard Yelena "She is okay. She is out still, Helen put her down to avoid she moving around much" coming closer she gave Yelena a gentle squeeze on her bicep, trying to ease her down.

"She protected me from getting stabbed" Kate said kissing Yelena's head lacing her hands tightly.

"The Rugrats?"

Eleanor walks close and puts a gentle hand on Yelena's shoulder "Darling why don't you just sit and take a breath? Kate is fine, the little troop is fine, your sister had medical treatment. She is good now.

"I-sure, ok" the Widow relents, Kate directs Yelena to a chair and both sit down leaning on each other. A couple of minutes later Antonia walked in with Yelena's mission bag, she told her to stay. They will take the others back to the farm.

Antonia asked Maria to just let her see you, and she accepted.

Aileen pup form yipped excitedly at the sight of the Widow.

("Tonia!")

"Hey pup! She kneeled down to hug the little shifter "taking care of your mama?”

("Yes! Will she be ok?") She asks the last with a wobbly voice.

"She will, she is one of the strongest women I've ever known and she trained me when I was a kid" she winked playfully. Antonia went ahead and ran a gentle hand through your fur before leaving, not without hugging little puppy Aileen tightly.

It took you a week to recover from the largest wound, well recover to a point where you could move around without feeling like being thorn apart. You had to stay in your wolf form, which was the best thing for the kids, funny as heck for the team and not so fun to Maria, who just wanted to kiss you, she enjoyed the cuddling though and playing with the soft-velvet wolf ears.

Kate, being Kate was so happy of you being in wolf form. She and Yelena weren't stopping anytime soon on thanking you for keeping them safe. Truth to be said you enjoyed cuddling your head against Kate's belly feeling the baby's feet and hand pushing against you and hearing her strong little heartbeat.

Now back in your human self Nick called you to his office.

"Given that the public knows who you are and Valentina knows you are alive. Is up to you if you keep your powers hidden still".

And you didn't, it was a waste of power for missions, you were now known as Thunder Wolf basically and obviously your original code name but now I'm English. You are now an official Avenger. But the greatest thing about this was the pride in Aileen's eyes "my aunts and uncles are Avengers, my mama is one too and my mom is their boss".

---

Things with Maria have it's ups and downs specially when it involves certain off grid jobs for Power Broker... Like is really hard to fool Maria, she is a great spy for a reason, your soul aches and dies a little everytime you have to deceive her to do what it has to be done. But you remember you are doing it for your daughter and for Maria.

Nick trusts you completely to handle this side missions. And usually you are able to pair them or make them simultaneously to helping out Yelena at freeing Widows.

As Aileen has grown older it has been a little easier to have alone time with Maria, alone time as in to have glorious sex marathons. Specially when the kid sleeps at a friend's house or she stays with her cousins. At fifteen she even babysits Wanda's twin sons, who are an adorable mayhem. They are three years old now. Other times she goes to Tony's house to nerd hard with Morgan.

The house is silent safe from the loud and unashamed pleasure screams scaping Maria's mouth. You took her to a fancy dinner, at your return to the house your wife surprised you with a jaw-dropping set of lingerie. Like a predator, after admired her you went to attack, you fucked her senseless is was a little rough you left hyckies all over her skin, her nipples are deliciously sore. And her pussy is already over sensitive and swollen from the endless make out sessions. Hill didn't let you get off easily, at some point she handcuffed you to a chair and gave you the sexiest and dirtiest lapdance ever, your back is deliciously scratched, hickeys? Maria never holds back your neck is a constellation, that she loves to take pictures of, due to you enhanced healing they usually heal way too fast for her liking.

The dark haired woman is stretched over you, her left bare leg over your hips, her breasts on yours. Blissfully naked and a little sticky with sweat, but Maria claimed being to sore to stand a shower, and too comfy to ditch this moment for a bath. And who are you to disobey your queen?

"Darling, Aileen is dangerously setting her mind on becoming an Avenger" she plants several kisses on your sternum before looking at you.

You sigh in defeat you try to reach out for the half smoked cigar but Maria stops your right hand with her left intertwining your fingers with a gentle firm grip.

"Talk to me" Maria rubs her thumb over the back of your hand.

"Is not that I don't want her. She is absolutely powerful and a excellent fighter. I just-" you sigh again in a little frustration "I don't want her life attached to this because she knows nothing better".

"The things we see, the things we do... I'm pretty sure Kate regrets it sometimes. People calls us heroes and yet they have no idea of the villainous, atrocious things we must do when the cameras aren't focused on us to keep them safe".

You feel her nodding her head before she sets her face on your skin "where's the kid that just wanted to be a UFC pro and a rockstar?" Maria says with a fond smile.

---

Even with the ups and downs Aileen was a raising MMA star. The kid was dangerous on the mats and the octagon. Maria and you supported her completely, Tony being the eccentric uncle even equiped the gym were she trained with the best of best. She had to wear a power damper but still she was a prodigy.

You and Maria made sure she had a private coach to work on her skills. Your wife and you couldn't be more proud of the kid, she was an excellent student, a soaring athlete and yes, she still had that rockstar dream floating around, she is an excellent bass player, she has the keen ear obviously and a powerful singer. Like she can pull off a Lzzy Hale or sing clean voice beautifully.

Usually you blast rock and metal on your car which has been quite bonding for the two of you, while Maria pretends she hates it, she loves it. Which makes Aileen laugh, her mom supposedly don't like rock and Metal but is the first at buying tickets for concerts.

When she is set to do gigs you and Maria go, if by any major reason your can't always at least one of the team go. Usually is Nat, Yelena or Wanda, Kate tags along with anyone that goes.

If someone had told you that after all you've been through. Life will give you a beautiful badass wife and an amazing daughter you wouldn't have believe it. But is true.

----

Aileen's manager thought it would be a good idea to engage social media platforms. The young fighter uploads videos of her training sessions, cooking her meals, sometimes even some of the Avengers join her making her comment section light up.

Today is the third time you joined her. The two of you decided to hit the climbing wall on the training facilities of the compound. Both of you with cargo pants and sports bra.

Aileen's friends were the ones recording the shenanigans you both pulled off. First you got along Aileen's standard training with her coaches before finally hitting off the climbing wall.

You both got into several rounds of racing up trying to defeat the other but youth versus experience was proving to be quite the tie.

"Come on Lee! Your mama is kicking your ass" her friends were teasing both of you but specially Lee since she was too self assure she could easily win... Boy she was wrong. Even with power damperer.

You playfully flex your arms "Decades in the making pup" you tease her "Besides this is easy cake comparing it to climbing a treacherous rock side with full battle gear on".

"Let's spice it up" Aileen said with a smirk "we put weighted vests and see who hits the clock faster".

You smile broadly at her, you gotta give it to her she has confidence "if I win, you cook and do laundry for a month".

"Easy, done" she says excitedly.

You wear a 70lb vest and Aileen a 35lb.

The first to go is Aileen who breaks the record by 35 seconds. She lets herself fall celebrating a presumably easy win.

"Come on mama Wolf, show her who is the boss!" Her friends had their money on you, the little shits.

You get yourself ready and as soon as the whistle is blown you move. With strength and agility you climb up faster than Aileen with ten seconds left you playfully hang with your left arm to show off with a playful hang loose sign you smirk at your daughter before pressing the timer botton with two seconds to spare.

"HELL YES!" Some of her friends shout in glee.

Is dinner time, courtesy of Aileen cooking when you see her flexing her face in disgust.

Maria quickly asks her what's wrong and the girl just pouts "nothing is just. I'm pretty used to people commenting on 'how hot' I look" she says with quote marks "but is quite disturbing when they say that about your mother".

You raise a curiously eyebrow and motion her to lend you her phone, she hesitantly does and your begin to scroll down the comments, they are priceless.

'mama wolf rail me'

'you lucky gal, sexiest mom alive you got there'

'is it me or the scars make mama Volkov hotter?'

'i bet her strap game is strong, Mrs. Volkov I respectfully ask you to rail me against the wall'

You completely loose it a that last one you read, you laugh a little more and recite Maria that epic comment.

"What's your connoceur opinion at that last comment Mrs.Hill?" You ask with a smirk.

Maria gives you a mischievous smile "out of ten? I'll give you a twenty darling"

"Oh god no! I don't wanna hear this. I'm out" Aileen gets impossibly red, snatches her phone out of your hand "enough ego stroking"

You only give her a loop sided grin.

"You know what, forget it. I'm sleeping at Aunt Yelena's place".

----

And right know sparring with your daughter feels surreal. Both of you wear power dampers, to relay fully on your skill. She is eighteen barely an inch shorter than Maria, you still have borderline three inches more but the kid has you on your toes.

Kate, Yelena and Natasha are outside the ring coaching both of you. The little ones are on Aileen's side "kick her butt Lee!" Tommy shouts at the top of his lungs making you chuckle. They might be nonblood cousins, but sometimes they act more like siblings.

Oh the beauty of youth. Aileen has fast punches. But the her danger resides on the fact that her style shifts along the fight she can be stoic and brutal, evasive and graceful like her widow aunts.

And the ultimate proof is how she ends you. You see it coming Natasha's Widow iconic move, but she uses it like Yelena. She just hauls you against the wire cage. Before you can react she jumps on your shoulders, grabs you by the neck with her legs and flips you with the momentum. You smack on the floor hard, she doesn't let go of her hold and tightens. You try rolling to stand but she rolls with you, like a crocodile. You could only tap out before you pass out.

"YES!" Morgan, Billy and Tommy shouted at the top of their lungs.

You raspily chuckled sprawled on the mat, your pup indeed kicked your ass.

"Still alive?" Yelena asks hovering with a wide smirk.

Aileen was kneeling by your right looking at you with a nervous and yet proud smile. She tapped your stomach "you ok mama?".

In a sudden move you pull the young woman to you to hug her tightly "Man, I've never been happier at getting my ass hurled to the floor".

"Volkov! Don't smother my daughter before her big fight" Maria shouts strolling in.

The two of you laugh "Nah I just strangled her she can't scape ME anymore" Aileen said with a cheeky grin.

"You little shit" you grumbled as she helped you raising up.

"My dear sestra, you are getting old" Yelena said patting your back forcibly, you glared at her "put on your gloves little shit".

Kate cut in quickly getting between you too "No, no, no, no. Enough you two. I don't want my wife all banged up tomorrow, we must slay that front row".

The rest of the day was all recovery for Aileen, tomorrow night is her first big stellar fight.

Big fight, big crowd. The whole A-team and troop was there at front row. Courtesy of Tony. While the others enjoyed the fights Maria and you were on the prep room with Aileen. The kid was over excited and buzzing with energy, you are pretty sure that if it wasn't for her power damper she would have electricity running over her skin.

She is restless even when the coach tells her to chill out she is ready. Maria goes to her and gently holds her shoulders "Love, you are ready, you are one of the best, just think is your mama there and kick her ass".

"Hey!" Your smile shifts into offended mode making Aileen and the coach crew laugh.

Before Maria and you leave to take your seats you two hug and kiss the kid in the head wishing her the best.

You lean forehead to forehead with her "You got this mor grom shchenok give em hell".

Maria and you exit hand to hand the locker room, you offer her your arm in a chivalrous manner. Like you know she rocks the shit out of her high heels, but you love how she walks flush to you when your arms are interlocked.

The roar of the public when Aileen "Thunder Punch" Volkov-Hill is called to the octagon is deafening. Truly electrifying.

You see her stepping in with so much focus and confidence. Man you couldn't be prouder, and your smile tells it all. Maria interlocks your fingers and you can feel her pride. When you take the chance to look at her you see her looking at the kid with so much pride.

"You got this Lee!" The tiny twins, Stevie, Stella and Morgan shout at the top of their lungs.

"Kick her ass Lee!" Tommy shouts right after making everyone around laugh.

"That's twenty to the swear jar!" Steve says with a wink. Like you all doesn't give much a damn about the kids saying a bad word once in a while, none of you are better.

[generalluxun]

Miraculous Movie Character Headcanon

So I know I have zero to go on, and odds are this is wrong, but I have at LEAST until 2026 before it matters, so...

Chloé Bourgeois headcanon: This Chloé actually despises both of her parents. Her upbringing is largely the same as show Chloé, but she's made the connection that no, neither of them really love her as a daughter. She's a prize/trophy at best and an annoyance at worst. She openly resents them, but as with most kids she's powerless to do much about this fact, and so it comes out as bullying outbursts.

Some supports for this:

She neve mentions her parents, or calls for daddy on anything. The closest we get is a 'Do you know who I am?' which is a very general notion of self-importance, not the same level of parental-desperation.

Sabrina's far more independent around her. This is not a minion/master relationship like S4/5 tried to pedal. While it's still clearly more take than give on Chloé's part, it doesn't feel like Sabrina *has* to be there. She knows what Chloé is like, and that she can leave. She chooses not to. There needs to be more there under the hood for this to be the case.

The times Sabrina does look scared is when Chloé is raging out. This distinction makes me think she's mad *because* Chloé is raging and those outbursts scare her, perhaps as something abnormal. No Chloé's not a saint, she's a snob, but the intensity of these explosions is something abnormal.

What does this mean?

I dunno! It could lead to some very different interactions, and is mostly fun for laying around with.

Her path to change would be very different for one thing. Since a lack of self worth and feeling a loss of control in her life(parental inflicted) is the root. Heroing and learning to build her self worth by doing good things rather than by tearing those around her down seems like a solid path. This would be an interesting reflection of Marinette's own Journey in the first movie. Marinette believed she was nothing, and beat herself up for it. Chloé believes she's nothing, and beats everyone else up for it.

Zoé could be entirely different if she is brought in. Chloé might absolutely love the idea of a family member who is *not* her parents to be family with. If sisterly-conflict is needed you could have Zoé's absolute desire to be one big happy family clashing with Chloé's desire to have nothing to do with her parents.

Just some overall ideas that came to me and might be fun to explore in fanfic.