#there is a music one so??? time to update

[spamgyu]

i know a lot of people say mingyu is so boyfriend coded, but i like pain and i want to challenge that idea by saying; mingyu is so ex-boyfriend coded.

he was the boyfriend you dated when you two were far too young to understand how relationships should be - maybe even first loves.

it was a relationship that ended because love isn't enough – because when you date someone that young, you two were still figuring out who you were and what part you played in the world.

mingyu was the ex boyfriend that you broke up with under the terms of 'mutual understanding', but god does it fucking hurt every now and then. especially the very first time you heard of him moving on.

she's amazing, by the way. the girl that he showed hints of on his instagram posts. and from what you've heard, she's everything he has ever asked for in a partner... maybe even more.

but that's besides the point. it's not like you want him back.

mingyu's the ex boyfriend you would occasionally check up on social media and see how much his features has matured – his cheekbones and jaw are much more prominent. he also gained that muscle mass he had always talked about when you two dated.

it was strange seeing him now, because although he looked familiar – pieces of the boy you once loved still very much evident whenever he posted images or videos of him smiling and laughing, he was nothing but a stranger.

his taste of music has changed, so has his style... the way he posted was no longer carefree.

you would occasionally watch the vlogs he posted, just to hear his voice again. not in a way where you missed him as a boyfriend... but as a friend.

his laugh still sounded the same, the way he got excited for meals was still very much how you remembered – but there was something different and you can't quite put a finger on what it was.

in the moments stillness, when you couldn't help but think back at how life was before you had reached your goals – your mind would wander back to mingyu. in moments when you are unable to get a full grasp of reality, you allow yourself back to the sense of familiarity – the one that once had him present.

seeing your past in the eyes of someone who you only knew behind your screen is a weird sensation but when the days felt long, and the world felt cold, he somehow made that uneasiness you felt at the pit of your stomach feel like home.

you don't dare to reach out, you two have grown past that.

the occasional updates from mutual friends in passing was more than enough.

mingyu was all just a part of your past after all.

PERMANENT TAGLIST

@thegirlwhoimagined @calicoups @ohmygodwhyareallusernamestaken @f4iryjjosh @akeminy

@yonabutnotyuna @tacosandbitch @aaniag @bettybotterboughtabitofbutter @xbaekcult

@alwaysalmostthere @ashkuuuu @morkswatermelonnnnn @isabellah29 @lottogyu

@bubbly-moon @lllucere @bo-fairykim @pluviophile-xxx

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@squashcolouredskies @viewvuu @black-swan-blog27 @got7svt6 @singulapity

[spicywhenspeaking]

If I'm There Chapter: Twenty-Five

read from part one here!

summary: Noah and Natalie met in high school and developed a relationship through their love of music and art. Falling in love, innocent and young, they think nothing can keep them apart. However, sometimes in the pursuit of your dreams the things we love the most get left behind.

this is a complete work of fiction, some characters while based on real people are totally made up. :)

Taglist: @lma1986 @cookiesupplier @notingridslurkaccount @thisbicc @laurpartyprogram @to-be-written @concretenoah @thebadchic @madomens @samanthasgone @myownthoughts12 @missduffsblog @jilliemiw86 @malerieee @hi-fancy-seeing-you-here @badomenslrh @robabankfuckmickeymouse @darknightstarryeyes @xxkittenkissesxx @mitchhbitch @sorrowsofsilence @blackveilomens

note: I'm sorry I've been gone for so long! I took a much needed writing break but am excited to get back into a schedule. I can't guarantee when I'll upload but I'm sure it won't be another 3 months between updates...lol sorry again.

“Oh shit!” Noah squeals as his roller-blades skitter back and forth trying to catch his balance as Erin circles the two of us as we stake alongside her. I’ve taken her skating several times and have figured out how to remain upright, although I’m no expert I can keep up with the other roller moms. Noah on the other hand is like an unsteady infant taking his first steps. Before he falls on his ass again he reaches out and grabs onto me in an attempt to remain standing. 

“Ah! No, don't! Noah!” I cry out as I lose my balance and my stakes fly out from under me and we both fall onto a heap on the floor. I end up on my back with Noah looming over me having caught himself with his hands before crushing me completely. He’s close enough that the short hair that falls in front of his face tickles my forehead. 

“Oh, sorry” he says and his breath caresses my cheek. My voice is caught in my throat. I know there is a blush creeping up my neck but I ignore it as we shuffle to get back onto our feet. Sliding and clinging onto the side of the rink to remain upright. 

Laughing loudly he looks at me with a smile that takes up half of his face, “guess I’m in need of practice.” I return a small laugh and nod in agreement. 

Erin continues to circle us with a quizzical look on her face, “y’all are funny. Let's go! A few more turns and then can we go get ice cream?!” Giggling she rushes off as we slowly follow with Noah refusing to let go of my hand.

“Sorry, I really don’t want to bust my ass again.” Squeezing his hand in encouragement we continue forward after our daughter. “No worries Noah, I’ll catch you if you fall again.” 

Noah’s POV

I almost stumble again at her words. She's using the same words I wrote for her all those years ago back at me. Does she even realize what she said? Probably not. Maybe? I shake it off for now as she pulls me forward. 

We go around the skating rink hand in hand and I selfishly hold as tight as I can, only letting go once we’ve exited the rink and sat down to take off our stakes. 

“So what's good for ice cream around here?” I ask while we turn in our stakes before we head out the door into the hot summer air. “I like Amy's! They have lots of yummy flavors!” Erin cheers. She’s walking between us, holding both of our hands. I was shocked at first when she grabbed my hand but it filled my heart with so much joy—more than I ever thought possible. 

“What do you like to get at Amy’s Erin?” I asked while seated in the passenger seat of the car. “Hmmm I like getting sweet cream with Oreos and rainbow sprinkles! It’s sooo good!”

Her excitement is contagious as Natalie’s smile is also spread wide across her face as she listens to Erin. “What about you Nat? What’s your favorite?” I turn my gaze to her and the summer heat has given her a glowy sheen of sweat on her cheeks causing her blush to shine.

She looks so beautiful. I want to kiss her. I wish I could.

“I like to get the Mexican vanilla with strawberries and chocolate chips, I think you’ll like their stuff. Lots of choices.” 

I turn up the radio and Erin squeals with joy! “This was in the movie Aunt Hales and I watched!” 

“Reaching for something in the distance..” 

Natalie sings along with her, “so close you can almost taste it release your inhibitions.”

The song is too good not to sing along, so as we drive to get ice cream, I find myself singing along as well.

“Feel the rain on your skin, no one else can feel it for you! Only you can let it in..”

Did I think six months ago I would be singing Unwritten by Natasha Bedingfield in the car with my daughter and the girl I've always loved? Not at all, but this is something I wouldn’t trade for anything.  I won’t let her get away this time, I’m just going to have to play the long game and hopefully, she will trust me with her heart again. 

Hours later, after some amazing ice cream Natalie and Erin are dropping me off at my Airbnb. I chose something that wasn’t too far from their house and there’s a pool. Erin was excited about that. She was running from room to room looking at all of the spaces.

“I got this place because it has lots of room, so if Erin ever wanted to spend the night she would have her own space,” I say to Natalie. She smiles softly, “she’d love that Noah. Maybe when she gets back from art camp?” she responds.

“And of course you two can come over and use the pool whenever, even next week Erins at camp? You could come over and hang out? The other guys will be here Thursday” I ask nervously. God, why am I so nervous, I’ve known Nat for years. It’s not weird to ask her to hang out…right?

“I would love that, I’m free on Wednesday?” She says looking out at the yard as Erin runs in the grass next to the water. 

So she knows the guys won’t be here until Thursday but wants to come over on Wednesday.. that’s good? right? Stop reading into it man, just live.

“Wednesday is amazing, I’ll grab snacks.” god I sound pathetic. 

She giggles while we watch Erin take off doing cartwheels now, “she is an endless stream of energy.” she comments quietly. “She really is, I’d like some of that. I’m exhausted.” 

Natalie’s energy shifts slightly, “oh you’re right. You’ve been on the move all day. We should get out of your hair so you can relax.” 

“Oh- no that’s-” I try to catch her but she’s already at the backdoor quietly calling for Erin to head home.  Why did I say that?…idiot. 

“Noah! This house is awesome!! I can’t wait to come over this summer! After my camp next week I’m totally coming over to swim!” she says as she runs up to give her a goodbye hug. 

I return the hug, wrapping her tight in my arms. “Can’t wait for it kiddo, I’ll grab some floats this weekend. It’ll be a fun summer for sure.” I say looking up to see Natalie snapping what I’m sure she was hoping was an incognito photo. “Send that to me please?”

She nods and they move to exit, “Nat, wait.” I reach and softly grab her arm, pulling her quickly into a hug. “I’ll see you later, I had fun today.” 

“I had fun too Noah.” her hands squeeze my sides briefly before she releases and they head to their car. They pull out of the driveway and a thought hits me.

I rush to my guitar and sit down to get the idea out while it’s fresh in my head. 

I can wait for you at the bottom I can stay away if you want me to I can wait for years if I gotta Heaven knows I ain’t getting over you Can we try again? When we’re not so different Can we make amends? Why can’t we just pretend?

I jot down the slightly altered lyrics on a random scrap of paper I see in my guitar case and shut it. 

I finish unpacking and jump into the shower to rinse off. I hop out at the exact time I see my phone ringing, Erin is calling. 

“Hey, kiddo! What’s up?”

“Hey, Noah! I was wondering if you would come with us on Sunday to drop me off at camp. It’s a couple of hours away though so if you have plans I understand.” 

“I don’t have anything going on, I’d love to tag along.” 

“MOM! HE SAID YES! - sweetheart I thought we agreed we’d call tomorrow? Noah’s had a long day - I was too excited…I’m sorry Noah.” 

“Hey, it’s no worries kiddo! You can call me whenever you need too.”

“Mom?! Did you hear that? Noah said it’s okay!”

I hear Natty’s laugh on the other end of the phone and it kills me that we’re not just all together laughing. Lately that’s all I can think about. All I want. 

“Well I am supposed to look at what clothes I’m packing for camp right now but I’ll see you on Sunday!” 

“I’ll see you Sunday kiddo.” 

Natalie POV

“So is it like a date?” Haylie asks. Were sitting on her bed later that night after having packed Erin’s camp bag and her going to bed. 

“It’s not a date! It’s swimming. We’re just two old friends hanging out.” the moment the words are out of my mouth I know it’s bullshit. I don’t know if it will ever feel like just two old friends with Noah. 

“I’d argue with you but I know you don’t even believe what you just said so it’s pretty pointless.” I throw my head back onto the pillows and sigh in defeat.

“I wish I believed it. I wish I could just be normal around him. It’s like I’m a teenager all over again…do I remember everything bad that happened? Of course..but I also remember all of the good things..ugh! Why are feelings so complicated?! Like am I a horrible person with no backbone if I forgive him for everything and just let him back into my life like no time has passed? Or am I a bitch if I keep him at arm’s length for the rest of our lives despite my feelings for him because of mistakes we made as kids?” 

I feel the bed dip down as Haylie sits down next to me. “Unfortunately I don’t have the answer for you, but I know you are not a horrible person or a bitch. Life is complicated and confusing and all you can do is consider what is best for you and Erin. I’ll support you no matter what you choose to do…but what I will say is that since you two started talking again…you’ve been different. Happier than I’ve seen you in a long time.” 

She’s right. I’ve felt happier than I have in years since I reconnected with Noah. That has to mean something. 

Maybe it’s time to just let myself be open to what could happen.

Could we even have anything like that again? 

Under the same Texas moon, two lonely hearts thought in tandem if the other may be open to loving them again.

[vinylfoxbooks]

June 15 - Release | @jegulus-microfic | wc: 1,575 The environment is inspired by this tiktok The premise of this is inspired by this tiktok and I can only hope that I properly portrayed the pure emotion that this tiktok gave me The songs that James plays are as follows: Moonlight Sonata 1st movement (Beethoven), Fur Elise - Dark Version (Toms Mucenieks), Beauty in Betrayal (Lennard Kastner)

Regulus is in and out of the building they're hiding in: an abandoned thing that might’ve once had many rooms but has since lost many of its separating walls. He thinks it might’ve been a hotel or a hospital, an open lobby with what was probably once a garden in the center of it, an old, out of tune piano that might not even work surrounded by debris that few of them have the confidence to climb around in. Around it, on several floors, are mezzanines to walk on, leading to a series of doors. There’s a desk in the back. 

It’s old, it's decrepit, and several parts of it they’re too scared to venture into but it’s hidden. It’s secret, and it holds all of them without cramping them together. 

They’re upset about it, but James and Lily aren’t allowed to leave the building -- after all, when Regulus came to them and their friends, it was them that Voldemort was wanting, having been sold out by Peter. So, usually Regulus, Dorcas, and Mary are the ones to leave and get food and toiletries for everyone staying in there. Occasionally Barty or Evan will come by and give them proper updates -- Regulus can only do so much acting as a spy for both sides for the war -- but their visits have to be sparse and only occasional. 

Regulus has been gone for about a week at this point, having to travel and stay for several meetings with Voldemort and has just returned back to the hideout. It’s the middle of the night and Regulus has just gotten into more comfortable clothes and laid down, getting ready for bed. However, as he’s feeling the sweet release of sleep pull him under, there’s a noise. Or rather, a lot of noise. Music, maybe?

It’s faint, but just loud enough to pull Regulus out of bed and onto tired feet. He ventures out of his room, on the second floor of the building and leans against the railing, feeling his breath punched out of his chest because-

Because James is sitting at the bench of the out of tune grand piano sitting in what was once a lobby. There’s debris around him by some of the doorways -- Regulus wishes so desperately he could know what had happened to this building to leave it in such a state -- and he’s sitting at the piano and-

“It’s been a long time since I’ve seen him play.” Sirius says from beside Regulus, scaring him out of his reverie, “Sorry.”

“No it’s fine, I just- I didn’t know that…”

“That James played the piano?” Sirius finishes for him, watching his best friend with adoration, “He’s been playing since he was a kid, told me that watching Effie play made him fall in love with it. But as he got older, he stopped playing. Told me that he only ever plays when he’s stressed or worried about something, like a release.”

“And you’ve heard him play?”

“Once,” Sirius shakes his head, “It was right after he got the letter that his parents were sick, dragon pox. I was with him when he got it and he ran all the way to the Potter mansion. He sat in front of that piano with his parents nearby for hours, playing song after song. I think he just didn’t want us to see that he was crying.”

“He’s beautiful.” Regulus breathes, watching his ex-boyfriend play. Regulus regrets their break up everyday. He was the one that left James after taking the dark mark, deciding that he didn’t deserve James, and after he left James went with Lily. They had a child together and seemed happy, but since Regulus went into semi-hiding with them, he’s seen that their marriage was more one of expectation than it was one of romantic love. They sleep in different rooms and alternate which nights they take care of Harry, which room he sleeps in. Lily and Mary seem to be flirting pretty heavily, which Regulus is glad that they’re finding light in the situation but James-

Sirius sighs, “He’s not doing alright… he’s worried about Harry, about Lily, about Remus and I, about Peter coming back… he’s worried about you, Reg.”

“Me? Why would he be worried about me, I- I was horrible to him.”

“That doesn’t mean that he doesn’t still love you, Reggie.” The older brother shakes his head, finally taking his eyes off of James to look at his brother, “You were his light. He knew that you weren’t leaving him because you didn’t love him. And I mean, you were the ones that saved us. You found him, you told him what happened, you saved his life. And the life of his son.” 

“And you going around and risking your life, not saying anything to us for weeks is terribly stressful, even for someone that isn’t close with you.” Another voice says. Lily. Her hair is braided and her eyes aren’t shining like usual but she’s still breathtaking -- Regulus has always admired Lily’s beauty. The girl comes to stand on the other side of Regulus, placing a hand on his shoulder, a sleepy Harry resting against her shoulder and sitting on her hip opposite to Regulus, “We’re all worried about you. But James especially. I could tell that he never fell out of love with you. He was always checking the news to see if you showed up somewhere.”

“And you didn’t mind that?”

Lily shakes her head with a soft laugh, watching her husband -- they’re technically still married even if separated, “No. Because I didn’t love him like that either. Yes, we got married. Yes, we had a child together but both of our hearts were taken with other people. His was taken with you.” As she finishes her statement the song that James was playing comes to a close and another starts up, just as intense, just as emotional as the first. Lily takes her hand off of Regulus’ shoulder, “Go talk to him. Or at least sit with him.” 

Regulus nods and rushes to the stairs of the building, hurrying down them with the echoing music James is playing sweeping him towards his ex. Towards his lover. 

He climbs over the debris as quietly as he can, standing just behind James and watching the way his deft fingers fly over the keys. Even out of tune, the song that James is playing is breathtaking.

When James finishes with the song that he’s playing, he finally turns to see Regulus, offering a weak smile. His eyes are red-lined and tear streaks cover his puffy face. Regulus feels his heart drop into his stomach, “Hello Jamie.”

“Reg.” James says, the word coming out like a breath. Like a sigh of relief after a long, stressful day. James is too much of a worry. He wears his heart on his sleeve and worries himself nearly to death. If Voldemort doesn’t kill him in this war, James is going to work himself into his own grave. 

Regulus moves to sit on the piano bench with James, wrapping his arm around James’ waist, “I’ve got you James. I’m sorry.”

James shakes his head, “You have nothing to be sorry about, Reg. You saved our lives.” His voice is shaky and tears well up in his eyes as he speaks.

“I have everything to be sorry about, Jamie.”

“Let’s not focus on what we did wrong.” James smiles weakly at his ex, leaning into his body, “If we’re facing the end of the world as we know it, what good is it to focus on the bad.”

“You’re perfect.” Regulus breathes, feeling his own eyes well up with tears, “Play me another one?”

James nods, his hands reaching towards the piano again though he doesn’t stop leaning into Regulus’ body warmth, “Of course.” And with that, his hands set to work on a piece -- likely muscle memory which is incredible to Regulus. It’s beautiful, it’s melancholic. It’s their relationship, it’s the world as it collapses around them, it’s the worries that they all have -- worries that they won’t make it out of this war alive, worries about their future, about their loved ones. 

It's tragedy and it’s beautiful. 

Regulus never takes his arm from James’ back, however he does lift his head from where it’s begun resting on James’ shoulder and looks around the old abandoned building. Sirius and Lily are still standing where he left them, only having moved closer to each other. Remus has come out as well and is resting his head on Sirius’ and Harry is fully awake in Lily’s arms and they’re all watching the two of them at the piano. As Mary starts to walk over to the four of them as well, her own eyes trained to the piano, Regulus shifts his gaze to where Marlene and Dorcas are leaning against each other across the second floor from the others. Dorcas offers him a smile and a nod. 

He looks up for a moment, taking in the beautiful stained glass ceiling above them -- or what’s left of it as several of the coloured glass pieces has fallen from their frames -- and into the stars above for a moment before letting his eyes fall closed and letting his mind taken by the music James is playing, allowing those beautiful notes to sweep him into the night, into the stars, and into a better future.

[fence-time]

OKAY! EXPLOSION TIME

@wireman-au - you already know this one, but i think they updated since last time

Lifeline AU - by @/slash-magpie (sorry mags, unsure if you're ok with being pinged)! Good fic based off of a video game that i enjoy greatly. Changed my life nodders. llau!imp n skizz are very important to me they're so fucked up,, every mental illness ever about this au. Main characters... well, I don't wanna give too many spoilers, but let's stick with the first three: Impulse, Tango, Pearl! also joehills and zedaphplays are amazing human beings (COUGHS LOUDLY AT JOE IN LB) and i love them

Chasing the Horizon Line - by @nine-of-diamonds and @1watermelontea! Mers :3 they're fun and i also greatly enjoy imp n skizz here though it's less centered around them and more around gem... (first book, at least. also i inspired melon to add a Thing about skizz in this fic so im proud of that fact)

wanna break all the clocks and mirrors - very cute, pretty quick one-shot about imp n skizz and limited life!

The Haunts That Bind Us - *squints* im like. 90% sure rusty courage made this. it's good. phasmo :3 lots of angst and trauma and impulsesv

Birdsongs - OHHHHHHHH MY GOD THIS FIC. THIS. FIC. ranchers slowburn but subtle enough you can ignore it if you're not into shipping, people are correctly written for once, LATE 90'S-EARLY 2000'S MUSIC FESTIVAL AU. it's amazing. scott gets into a bar fight. jimmy steals something. first chapter is tango tek waking up from drunk music playing. skizz is amazing i love him. very very vague spoilers: weed + enjoys movies = pondering arson

i believe that we will see a better day - this fic has a special place in my heart for Reasons that i will not elaborate on as i do not want to have any personal information leaked don't think about it too hard <3 good fic

Natural Satellite - You probably aren't in this fandom but the fic is good i trust you can learn by context clues!! i love gay people!! this fandom is very good at visceral descriptions of love and also just visceral descriptions in general

Traveling Thieves - LOOOOOONG series but soso good! will not elaborate

And finally, if i may suggest some of my own headcanon/rarepair propaganda:

(how does it feel?) to be an expert in a dying field - i wrote this for mcyt aro week! grayro skizz, my beloved rarepair snowangel, title from my favorite band... yea :3 quite proud of it!!

...sorry if you've read any of these already

OH MY GOODNESS I’M SORRY MATE. ITS BEEN TOO LONG AUEEHHH OOPS? tho thank you so so much :O!!!

[phytine]

The results are here, one day late of course (thanks french administration you never disappoint) and I'm accepted. 198th for 598th accepted.

I'm a french teacher.

Goodbye unemployment after the PHD. I'm not a teacher in my speciality but that's all that matters.

[macksartblock]

could you do some gothcleats? pretty please

anyone else haunted by snowballs at school dances? no? just me okay

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

I was *not* longing, I swear.

[First] Prev <–-> Next

[damnation-if]

hey!! can i ask for a color palatte description for the ro's? like what their hair/eye colors are?

hope you're having a good week 💙💙💙

Hi!

I spent a long time putting together a graphic for this before I realised that you asked for just a description haha... oops. well. here is the graphic anyway XD

If you're looking for a link to the page with more general descriptions, there are some on the RO's page.

Very sorry for the delay in replying! My life is. hectic. smdnfgbsfgf

[oatbugs]

procrastination is starting to have its consequences finally

[skitskatdacat63]

Credits to @ayceeofspades, she was the director behind this, I was just the editor.(There's a full version of this, which I shall not be posting on main out of self preservation, but dm if you want to see it bcs I think the full version is truly a masterpiece :] )

[kindlythevoid]

Picture this:

Me, listening to some old-ish Tunes from the 2000s-2010s era, just minding my own business, not really paying attention but jamming out, finding a particular song delightful: *checks phone for band* Me: ... Me:

That is all.

[sonknuxadow]

how did sonic superstars get nominated for best family game at the game awards while sonic frontiers, an infinitely better sonic game, got nothing this year or last year aside from the players voice nomination .... also they nominated mario and a few other games for like 500 different categories while only one category had a sonic related thing AND they let genshin impact back in AGAIN........ do you think the game awards are specifically designed to torture sonic fans . whatever sonic frontiers game of the year to ME.

[duskandcobalt]

"hey didn't you say you were going to update your fic today?" yes but have we considered that i was so very busy laying on my couch and staring at my ceiling thinking about cassian knocking nesta's knees apart with his knee to spread her legs

[yangjeongin]

FINALLY finally got a JOB OFFER after applying to jobs nearly every day for like two months and in general job hunting since june and it's a full time job doing something i actually like i cannot Believe it like this does not feel real. and yet my single dumb bitch braincell is in the back of my mind like. how do i do a 30 day birthday countdown for hyunjin in these conditions

[yappacadaver]

guess who uninstalled bg3 to make room for inquisition. guess.

[tangirlisfangirl]

if anyone bought the dan avidan cover of everytime we touch when funding the touchstarved kickstarter, please hmu!! its the perfect song for the yandere playlist im making so itd be a huge help if you could send the download 🤗