#there were like maybe 2 channels that were aiming to actually help art but like swear the amount of channels i saw in that time that were

[ubashaaa-archived]

does anybody remember that period of time where “art critique” channels just started popping up everywhere. and would like. go on DeviantArt and just poke at art, most of the time being art by kids. what the hell was up with that

[ygreczed-3]

The Red Guard and the Snow Angel

Summer Falls desert concept art

Hank and Connor

Gavin and Nines meditating + thunder, snow, fire and wind seal

Gavin and the thunder spirit

More concept arts - traditional art & inking

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5

When they go through the Summer Falls desert, Connor and Nines pass out fairly soon due to their intolerance to fire magic. They only get better at night, when the temperature drops, so they stay awake to watch out while the humans sleep. During the day Hank and Gavin have to take them on their horse/Sumo and walk beside them, even though the intense heat isn't making things easy for them either. They reach a village in an oasis where Connor and Nines get better, and when they realize there's a spring in it, they decide to go and rest a bit as the night arrives.

Nines and Gavin are gone meditating on a less crowded part of the spring.

Gavin : That's stupid… How can this make me stronger than my training ? Nines : Stop talking and focus on your breathing.  Gavin : Grmphh.. Nines : Can you feel the source of magic inside your body ? Gavin : … Yeah. Nines : You have to… establish a connection with it. Show him you don't fear it Gavin : But I fear it. Nines : The war spirit you host is an incredible source of power, and you can believe me, it is as bellicose as you are. It only needs a goal to aim for and you'll be able to channel its energy.  Gavin : … You know I'm your enemy… Why do you help me ? Nines, closed eyes : I know I can compete with you. I'm ready to be challenged. And it's funnier to fight a skilled warrior than a scared little boy. Gavin : … Fucker.

X

Connor and Hank in the hot spring

Connor : I think that's what your hug feels like. Hank : hm ? Connor : The hot water. I think it's what hugs feel like. Hank : You said my hugs... Connor : Did I ? I was just thinking… about how you hug Sumo sometimes. He loves it. Hank : Yeah, this big boy loves cuddles  I admit that. Connor : It must feel good. Hank : What… You've never been hugged before ? Connor : Golems do have… intimate behaviors, of course but it's not… I mean we're… not physically warm, so... (NB : I was thinking golems in this universe would be like vampires, not as freezing as actual snow but still colder than humans) Hank : ...Thought you didn't like heat that much. Connor : Warmth from human's touch is different from fire magic : it feels more… safe, less aggressive. I think I'd like that. Hank : … How do you know that ? Connor : I touched your back to heal it, remember ? Your warmth feels nice. Hank : Yeah okay, you touched me, but you don't know what my hugs feel like ? Maybe you'd hate that. Connor : I wish I could know.

They look at each other, but then Hank looks away and stands up.

Hank : It's late, I'm tired. I'm going back to the inn. Connor seems disappointed, but then Hank keeps going. Hank : You coming ?

When they enter the room they share all together, Nines is already in stasis and Gavin is snoring loudly.

Hank takes Connor's wrist silently, looking at him in the eyes as if tacitly asking for permission. Connor just lets himself be enveloped by wide arms, and rests his cheek on his collar bone.

Connor sighs, closing his eyes as he enjoys that nice bear hug. He feels that warm something in his chest growing in his body, invading his stomach with pleasing flutters. 

Connor : Hank… Hank : Shhh… it would be embarrassing to wake those two idiots up now.

Connor bites his lower lip as he silently reaches for Hank's hand, his skin turning white as he presses gently each of his fingers against Hank's. It's known to be a quite intimate gesture among golems, and the closest human equivalence to it would be a kiss. Connor is aware that it could even be interpreted as indecent given how close their bodies are, and that if Nines was to wake up at that moment he would probably choke on thin air. Of course Hank has no clue about that and just thinks it's funny.

Hank : What, you wanna dance ?

Connor realizes they're holding each other on the left side and touching hands on the right side, and it seems like they're going to waltz. He chuckles from the absurdity of the situation from a human's perspective. 

Connor : I wouldn't know how to. Hank : Good thing, I'm a terrible dancer. Connor : Ahah...hmm, Hank, I like it. Can we stay like this for a moment ? Hank : Sure.

X

One night in the middle of the desert, Gavin is on the watch as Hank sleeps in the tent. Connor is with him, but Nines inexplicably stays around the fire, silent. Gavin is bored out so he just starts the conversation. 

Gavin : I feel like the old man and your stupid brother are getting along. Nines : I have this feeling too. Gavin : Doesn't bother you? Nines : What can I do ? I asked Connor to be careful, but I'm not blind… He's shining with glee whenever Hank is around him. I can't… force him not to feel. Also, I think Hank isn't that bad of a person… for a human. Gavin : Still certain we're the bad guys ? Think about it : you were made to serve us.  You betrayed your creators and let us starve like dogs. Nines : Humans didn't create us. Kamski did, and if he had wanted to, he could have made unthinking, obedient golems. Maybe we were meant to break free. Gavin : Oh yeah, so why can't you even procreate ? Simple answer: you were not designed to be an individual species from the start. You were built with no other purpose in life than to help us survive.  Nines : Didn't that even occur to you that humans did bad things too ? Gavin : We're just trying to survive ! Nines : So we are. Gavin : … So what ? You're saying we're two evils ? Of course we are. But I have to protect my people, you understand that ?

Nines stays silent, exploring the surprisingly genuine glare Gavin throws at him. Of course he understands that. His own despise for humanity is only driven by his deep desire to protect Connor, Marcus, and his people. He looks back at the fire heating them, unconsciously processing how ridiculously similar they are.

And yet, something starts growing in his mind, the irritating sensation his relationship with Gavin has changed from the moment they met, and that he unexpectedly wanted to protect him as well.

Nines : Would you kill me ?

He can't even explain how this sentence even made it out of his throat. He already knows the answer. Gavin stares at him longingly, noticeably surprised by the question. He stays silent as he puts more wood in the fire.

Gavin : If I had to, I probably would. But I… hum… don't want to. Nines : … hm. Gavin : What about you ? Would you kill me ? Nines : I don't know. If lives were at stake, certainly, even if I'd find this decision… regrettable. Gavin : ... Oh wow, is that your way to tell me you like me ? Nines : … Don't set your hopes too high.

Gavin breathes in a laugh and goes back to silence, smiling smugly. 

X

They arrive in Nestlepeek and split in two teams, Hank and Connor go to the center of the town, where Connor hopes to find more precise information about Kamski and where he hides.

Gavin and Nines were supposed to go buy supplies, but as they head to the covered market, they are challenged by a man in the street to defeat his champion in a fight. As Nines realizes it's all for illegal gambling, Gavin accepts and finds himself in a cage, combating a birdman.

He thinks he's got the hang of it but as soon as the birdman starts flying Gavin can't touch him with his sword anymore and becomes vulnerable to his aerial attacks.

Nines : Gavin ! Summon the spirit ! Gavin : No way ! Nines : You'll lose if you don't ! Gavin : I know what I'm doing, alright !? Nines : You obviously don't ! Thunder magic gives you advantageous long throw attacks, you can't win against a flying foe with close combat techniques ! Gavin : I think I killed enough Golems to know how to fight flying foes ! Nines : You bastard…

Nines uses his snow magic to catch the champion in ice and immobilize him.

Owner : What the hell !!! Who did that ?! Nines : I did. I'll replace your champion, open the cage.

The owner is confused first but then he sees the opportunity and accepts. Nines enters the cage and gets ready to fight.

Gavin : … You wanna die ? Told you I could do it. Nines : We've been talking about this fight for ages. It's time to see what you're capable of.

They start fighting and they're pretty even for the first ten minutes. Their fight gathered a lot of gamblers and spectators.

When Nines starts to take advantage, Gavin's eyes suddenly turn bright yellow, and he charges at him : Nines can see the thunder magic halo surrounding him. He parries many strikes but Gavin has gained in speed and ferocity. Soon enough, Gavin throws him to one extremity of the cage, and as the crowd around them is screaming in excitement, Gavin holds up his dagger. He's trembling, electricity forming around his hand. 

Nines can make eye contact but somehow, Gavin isn't answering his glare.

Nines : Gavin- You hear me ?

Gavin doesn't say anything, and Nines is sure he's gonna die when the human warrior shoots down his dagger… only to hit one of the cage's bars just behind him. Gavin closes his eyes, and opens them, showing blue-green orbs again, and he straightens up, breathless.

The crowd boos them as Gavin takes a step back and drops the other dagger. He asks the owner to open the cage and leaves the place, Nines following him, still out of breath as well.

Nines : Gavin !

Gavin stops, letting Nines get closer, until they face each other again.

Nines : You did it. You mastered the spirit… Do you realize that ? Gavin : I could have killed you, then everyone around me. That's what the spirit wanted to do… Do you realize that ? Nines : But you didn't. With a bit more training-... Gavin : I almost killed you, Nines, for fuck's  sake ! Nines : … So what ? Thought you were ready to. Gavin : Listen, this beast wanted you dead, everyone dead so bad… How can I… How can I use this power when I know how dangerous and unstable it is? Nines : … But you stopped it, right ? You can control it. Gavin : You fucker, if it wasn't for you, I know I couldn't have stopped it. I would have killed all those strangers, I know that, and I'm not… I'm not a murderer. Nines : … What do you mean, for me ? Gavin : Drop it. I need some air, don't follow me.

X

Hank and Connor enter the library, Connor is looking for the archived events-records to see if Kamski came into this village (which is most likely given it's the first one you can find after the desert)

It appears that the local people can fly so the library is very high, and most scales don't even reach the top of the bookshelves.

Hank : How the hell can we reach the archives ? Connor : Wait a minute, I'll go there and take some volumes with me.

Connor spreads his wings, that widen to support his weight as he takes off to the highest point of the library. Hank is impressed by how graceful Connor looks in the air. When the golem comes back with a consequential pile of old, handwritten books, he's just there, mouth open in amazement.

Connor : Here we go… the last 10 years of history in this village… Ready to pull an all-nighter ?

Hank doesn't reply.

Connor : Hank ? Hank : You're beautiful.

Connor blinks once, his lips slightly parted from the surprise, his eyes conveying nothing else than confusion and yet, low-key content.

Connor: ..I'm sorry ? Hank : When you fly I mean… that's impressive… and beautiful. Connor : Huh… Thank you, I guess ? Anyway hum… let's… let's find a table… Hank : “Thank you” ? But do you even realize how beautiful you are ? Connor : I was created to meet some human ideal. Why would I be proud of something that isn't my doing ? Hank : Ah, don't be so modest.  Connor : … you know, I think I find humans more attractive than Golems. Each one of you is unique, and I love everything you call “flaws”.

Hank laughs halfheartedly at his last line.

Hank : You don't make sense, kid.

X

They read the archives until it's dark outside. Hank can't help but yawn as Connor lights the candles to keep reading.

Connor : You can go back to the inn, Gavin must be there already, and Nines can take over. Hank : Nah, I'm good. Connor : Hm… Hank : You okay ? You look… worried. Connor sighs : … What if we can't find Kamski ? What if… I was wrong, what if we had to go back to Detroit and Jericho with just nothing ? I don't want to return to a situation where I'll have to fight you… I just can't.  Hank : … Yeah, I understand that. I don't think I can remain a Red Guard after what we've been through… After I got to know you. Connor : If we were to fail… nothing will never be the same again. Without you.

Hank just looks at Connor with sharp eyes, as if he's got the urge to say something. At this point Hank knows he's falling for the Golem, but of course, he won't say anything, because he's sure it's only one sided, Connor is so young and handsome he can't possibly feel the same.

Actually the dark haired golem is totally in love with the man, but again, he thinks Hank can't reciprocate his feelings since he's probably into women (after all he used to have a wife), and definitely not into Golems anyways. It just feels so unfair to both of them to consider going back to their normal life when they just want to stay with the other so bad. They just wish they could stay together and run away in some romantic and lovesick lunacy. Again, they won't tell each other about it.

[amymel86]

Hello! Do you have any bits of your awesome writing to share for WIP wednesday?😍

I just saw this anon!

And thank you for asking <3

This is a bit more of this as yet untitled 'post-apocalyptic/fertility/modern arranged relationship???' fic. The first bit I posted on tumblr is here and as before, some things are not yet decided (like town names) and things may change...

“Are you sure this is what you want to do, darling?” Her mother’s voice on the telephone was a balm to her soul.

Sansa’s finger brushed the soft vivid petals of the small potted iris she’d bought at the store today. The iris symbolises hope, wisdom and courage among other things and she prays that the pretty purple and yellow bloom will lend her some of those. “I’ve got to try something, Mum,” she says, turning her attention to the two separate bundles of paper in front of her. Two men, two candidates, two different futures. Sansa had filled out all the matching service’s extensive questionnaires and scrutinised all the information she could find on the program. It seemed simple enough – you’re rewarded for helping to repopulate. In turn, the authorities help to pair you with someone who should be a good match dependant on all the information they have about you. The aim is that this new generation of children are raised in the traditional family unit. That had appealed to Sansa. “I can’t seem to find the right guy all on my own anyway,” she said into her phone.

“How do you know it will be safe, though?”

“It says here that my situation will be monitored by my own caseworker. I can call them any time I want. They’re not just going to drop me at the guy’s house and just leave us get on with it.”

“Hmmm... tell me about them? These men that they’ve narrowed down for you.”

“One’s called Waymar, he’s a financial advisor here in the Vale,” Sasna pauses, looking at the man’s photograph on his paperwork before fishing out the other. “And the other is called Jon, he owns a farm in the Reach.”

“None in the north then?” Her mother has been itching to get her back home. “I just wish there was a way to know that either of them were good men, Sansa. That’s all I want for you.”

Sansa put the two photos together. Two possible fathers for her child.

“That’s what I want too.”

***

“Shit! Holy fucking shit!” Jon says to himself, hanging up from his phone-call. “Mance!” he yells, bursting out of his trailer to find the old man. “Mance! It worked! It fucking worked!”

He’d relented. When Mance first put it to him that he should sign up for that weird government breeding program or whatever the fuck it was, he thought the old man’s last brain-cell must’ve fried up in the sun. But if they were going to make it easier for them and it meant Mance could keep the farm (and Jon could carry on living there rent free), then it was worth a shot. So he had relented. He’d filled out what seemed to be a gazillion and one questions about himself, his politics, his views on family and finances and education and fucking... art and shit. These damned government people wanted to know everything about him down to whether he scrunched or folded his toilet paper it seemed. He’d even had to lie. He didn’t like doing it, but there was no way that a fertile was going to pick him if he didn’t. So, he fished out an old photograph – one taken before the bar brawl that lost him his sight in one eye, and he’d also lied his asscheeks off by claiming he had ownership of the farm. He knew – he knew – that these lies are just more things that were going to trip him up one of these days but with Mance urging him on, he’d signed that damn form and offered himself up for the program.

And now a fertile had chosen him.

Him.

Fuck, he might throw up.

This can go one of two ways. Either completely up Shit Creek without a paddle – with his lies and reality crashing down on top of one another, leaving them exposed... or, his fertile somehow looks past his deceits and sticks with him and they-... well, shit, he could actually become a father. No-one becomes parents these days, especially not ‘round here. Fertiles flock to the big cities, to men with bigger pockets, or they work for couples who can afford to pay them off in exchange for a kid or two.

“It worked?” Mance asks, rolling out from under an old Ford pickup that needed a new exhaust. “They sendin’ us a peach?”

Jon shook his head. “They’re not sendin’ you anyone, old man. An’ don’t call her that – they’re-“ Fuck, what did the council call them on all that paperwork? “Reproductively abled.” He’ll have to remember that if he doesn’t want to offend her.

“Well, shit,” Mance grins. “What did I tell ya? Knew your pretty face was good for somethin’!”

Jon frowns. “Ain’t so pretty no more though.” He might have to go get himself a patch to cover his milky, sightless eye. It’s fine most of the time since Mance is the only one he sees unless he’s going to drink at Hobb’s, but he certainly doesn’t want to put off his ferti- reproductively abled friend who’ll be arriving in three weeks.

“She got a name? Your new peach?” Mance asked, earning him a glare.

“Sansa. Sansa Stark.”

Mance grunts and nods. “Sounds fancy.”

Yeah... It did sound kinda fancy he supposes. Jon’s first reaction had been that it was a mighty beautiful name, but now he thinks of it...

“Shame we can’t look her up – see if she’s a beauty or not.”

Jon can’t remember a time when that was an option. He was barely 11 at the highest point of the virus’s hold. Government officials had deemed certain channels on the internet were causing more harm than good by spreading false rumours, incorrect statistics and completely counterintuitive medical advice. The whole thing was shut down, now deemed illegal, only to be reconnected again three years later apparently looking like a foreign landscape from the one before. The internet was no longer a platform to socialise, only government approved informative sites remained. Mance says it’s better this way – that all people used to do was post vain images of themselves for attention anyway.

Jon wouldn’t mind seeing a vain image of Sansa Stark right about now though.

Not that it mattered terribly. As long as they get along and she decides to stick around she could be as ugly as sin. In fact, she probably will be, won’t she? Most pretty ferti- reproductively abled women stick to the cities and its high-fliers.

It doesn’t matter, he told himself. You just gotta keep her happy here and-

“Mance?” he asks, an issue coming to mind. The man grunts in acknowledgement. “Where the fuck is she gonna sleep? She’s not gonna want to stay in my trailer.”

The man grins in response. “I’m glad you asked, boy. I’m glad you asked.”

***

Her caseworker was meant to meet her at the train station. It was quite a drive to the farm and he was meant to pick her up, make sure she’s safe and happy and introduce her to Jon.

That hasn’t happened.

“Please accept my apologies, my dear,” Mr Baelish said down the other end of the phone. “There’s been a mix up with my schedule. We can set you up for the night at a local motel or ask your match to come and get you. Which would you prefer?”

Sansa eyes the dirty looking motel across the street from the train station. Everything here at [[INSERT TOWN NAME]] seems a little on the... rundown side. Maybe the sooner she gets to the farm, the better. Plus, her tummy is all a flutter with anticipation to actually meet Jon. She’d wound up swaying towards Jon as a match due to a few reasons; 1 – he does not live in, around, or anywhere near Harry or his crazy mother. 2 – he owns a farm, and that had conjured up hazy daydreams of idyllic country life. Sansa may enjoy big nights out in the city, drinking her dirty margaritas and feeling her bones vibrate against the base beat in a nightclub, but she knows that’s not what she wants to raise a child around. A child will want to run barefoot through wheat fields and chase chickens and milk cows and –

Let’s just say Sansa has a few ideas and that they all helped to sway her away from city pleasures and towards farmhouse life. And Jon

And last, but not least, reason number 3 – Jon himself. Put side-by-side, his and Waymar’s photographs looked rather similar if truth be told, but Jon won out on something that Sansa just couldn’t describe. Looking at his photograph gave her goosepimples along her forearms because it was like he was looking right back at her. There was something in the depths of his eyes – a kindness? A wit? A strength? She’s not sure, but she couldn’t find the same qualities when she stared at Waymar’s likeness. And his answers too. His questionnaire was full of how he’d like to teach a kid how to walk and ride a bike and fix a... a tractor for heaven’s sake! And so her head was flooded once more of this idyllic life where they got up to watch the dawn stretch over the farmland and they’d grow their own vegetables and she’d bake a pie every day and it would just be perfect.

Perfect, perfect, perfect.

Sansa glances around the near abandoned train station.

This doesn’t look so perfect right now.

“Could you please arrange for Jon to come and get me, Mr Baelish?”

***

It’s been an hour and fifty-six minutes precisely since Sansa last spoke to Mr Baelish to arrange her match coming to get her. An hour and fifty-six minutes of sitting on the curb, waiting, surrounded by her three suitcases. She’d started off by sitting at the nearby bus stop, purely because it was somewhere to sit and she had a clear view of the road, but after the rude bus driver insisted that if she’s sat there, she must be wanting to hop on his bus, Sansa decided to park her butt on the dusty, sun-baked curb instead. Her legs were beginning to numb and she was starting to get a headache from the sun beaming down on her head. The curls she’d styled into her copper locks have likely lost their hold by now. What a waste. Opposite, on the other side of the street, beside the dirty little motel, there was a tiny bar that advertised the fact that it hosted exotic dancers at the weekends with a blinking neon sign. Next to it was a hunting and fishing ‘emporium’ and beside that was a vacant store with an old dirty sign that read ‘Blouses & More!’. Presumably, the ‘& more’ still wasn’t enough to keep that fine establishment in business in this funny little town. At the end of the block was ‘Tarly’s Drugstore’ and Sansa had been debating with herself whether or not she should haul her suitcases over to go buy a drink and a magazine for about the last hour and fifty-five minutes.

But she hadn’t wanted to miss Jon Snow’s arrival.

Jon Snow, who seemed to be pulling up outside Tarly’s Drugstore in a dusty Ford pickup truck right about now. Sansa stood, expecting him to come right on over considering how long she’d been waiting for him, but she found herself wondering if she’d got it all wrong when she hadn’t caught a good enough look at him before he darted straight into the store.

Sansa is done with waiting. She grabs her smallest case and places it on top of her larger one, trying her darnedest to roll all her luggage across the road in a lady-like fashion. She could feel the eyes of several passers-by on her while her stiletto heels clip across the street. In turn, her own gaze fell to Jon’s cream-coloured truck. Its front bumper looked a little rusty and wonky too. There was a big gash in the leather of the bench seating on the passenger side. On the truck bed, there were a number of items, including a rocking chair that seems to have a couple of spindles on the chair-back missing, and a new double bed mattress wrapped in clear plastic. Sansa was almost done frowning at the state of the vehicle when the over-door bell of the drugstore tinkles.

“Holy shit,” he curses. And yes, it definitely was Jon standing right in front of her. Only... well... his hair was tied into a knot at the back of his head and.... and... he was wearing a black eye patch? “Uh,” he stood there, arms laden with bottles from the store as the gaze from his one good eye quickly darted down her frame and back up again. “You’re her, right? You’re Sansa Stark?”

Sansa found she could only nod, looking him up and down, like he was with her. He was in jeans with oil smears, some tough, heavy looking boots, a somehow pristine white vest and flannel shirt with the arms ripped off.

Speaking of arms...

Gods-damn! Sansa’s focus was momentarily derailed...

“Sorry, I-“ Jon starts before his grey eye drops to the floor and then returns to her, looking a little bashful. “I didn’t expect you to be so pretty.”

Oh boy. He may be wearing an eye patch right now but this man could win over a thousand girls with that smile, Sansa’s sure of it. She resists the urge to giggle like a schoolgirl. She’s here to find out if they’re well suited enough to start a family together – she needs to keep her head and think rationally, not allow herself to be swayed by his rugged country boy charm. It was Harry’s looks that enticed her in the first place – and look how well that turned out for her?

“Thank you,” Sansa says, blinking back at him before his words truly hit home. “Didn’t they give you my photograph?”

Jon shook his head. “No, ma’am.”

Huh.

“Did they show you mine?”

Sansa bites her lip and gives a nod.

Jon grimaces. “So I guess you weren’t expecting this?” He points to his patch.

Sansa shakes her head. “No... did you... did you do something to injure it?”

Jerking his head, Jon begins rubbing at the back of his neck with his free hand. “It’s a long story... but... it ain’t gonna get any better, if that’s what you’re askin’.”

“Oh.”

They stood, staring at one another for a heartbeat or five before Jon sucks in a breath over his teeth and glances down to the bottles he clutched to his chest with one arm. “I tried to get you some things to help you feel at home,” he says, “these are the nicest smellin’ soaps ‘n’ stuff from Tarly’s.”

“Thank you,” Sansa replies, knowing full well that she brought her Highgarden Floral Scents bathroom range with her.

Jon chews on his lip as he eyes her suitcases. “Lemme get those for you,” he offers before dumping the bottles in his arms into the truck bed and reaching for her luggage. Sansa’s heeled shoes seem welded to the spot. Jon notices. Scrubbing both hands down his face in resignation, he takes a step closer to her and Sansa realises for the first time, that he had dirt beneath his fingernails. She wasn’t sure how she felt about that. “It was a shitty thing for me to do,” he offers, his words low and husky. Sansa feels the timbre of his voice set off a trickle of gooseflesh down her spine. “I’m sorry.”

She blinks at him, momentarily confused.

“About this,” he explains, brows high on his head as he points to his patch. “I shouldn’t have sent that old photo of before this happened, but – fuck – even my ex-girl won’t acknowledge I exist anymore with this and I knew I shoulda been honest about it but-“

“This ex-girl...” Sansa suddenly found herself left with a sour taste in her mouth. “... does she still mean something to you?”

Jon licks at his lips, his eye falling briefly to her own. “No, ma’am,” he shakes his head.

[sweetside]

Cannon Muses

“Mad” Moxxie (Borderlands)

Female Human

Physical: 6′3 (191 cm) 220 lbs.

BMI: 27.5 | Overweight (It’s Mostly her cow tits)

Background: Owner of a Multi-universe spanning chain of Bars and Restaurants.

Extremely top heavy. Moxxie wears a custom made bra, with an antigravity system built into it, so she can carry her “girls” around.

Milf in her 40’s

Don’t talk to her about her past lovers, or the smell of engine oil in her hair.

Nurse Joy (Pokémon)

Female Human

Physical: 5′4 (165 cm) 140 lbs.

BMI: 24 | Average

Background: A member of the Joy family. Who followed her family practice of health care.

Her Major? “Heavyset Pokémon Healthcare” Which is focused on maintaining the health of pokemon over 330 lbs in weight.

Despite her fragile look, Joy is pretty strong.

Nobody knows how the joy sisters tell each other apart.

Professor Sycamore (Pokemon XY)

Male Human

Physical: 6'5 (196 cm) 183 lbs.

BMI: 21.3 | Average

Background: The Pokemon professor of the Kalos region.

He kinda get’s caught up in his work, and doesn’t remember to sleep.

Can’t hold his balance, or liquor.

He think’s you are beautiful.

Kyoko Kirigiri (Danganronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc)

Female Human

Physical: 5'6 feet (167cm) 370lbs

BMI: 65 | Morbidly Obese

Background: The Ultimate Detective. Who had a perfectly normal life at school, nothing strange what so ever. After her graduation however, the stress of her job and fading friendships made her eat to compensate.

She is in DEEP denial about her weight.

May or may not have crushes on most of her classmates.

Bad at communicating her feelings.

Maya Fey (Ace Attorney)

Female Human

Physical: 5'2 feet (158 cm) 130 lbs

BMI: 23.8 | Average

Background: The head current of the Fey family and master of the kurian channeling technique. She likes burgers

Has worked in a law firm for a few years, and still keeps in touch.

Doesn’t gain weight from eating hamburgers

Listen she just really likes burgers, okay?

Samus Aran (Metroid) (Samus Picture by Lewdsona)

Female Human

Physical: 6'0 (183 cm) 500lbs

BMI: 68 | Morbidly Obese

Background: A former bounty hunter who saved the galaxy at least three times. However she received very little fame from her exploits. But the galaxy was safer, and she ran out of work. Which lead to her lounging around to spend her fortune.

Likes spicy food, and Mexican cuisine.

She still wears her zero-suit.

She’s surprisingly strong thanks to being genetically engineered.

Frida Moffete (Wakfu)

Female Human

Physical: 6,3 Feet (182.5 cm) 190 lbs

BMI: 23,7 | Average

Background: The head of an undersea “steampunk-esque” empire’s navy.

Has a temper, and sharp teeth.

Repressed fat kink, do to her occupation.

Has a giant metal shark mech, that she fought literal demons with.

Dorothy Haze (Va-11 hall-A)

Female Android

Physical: 4,7 Feet (143 cm)

BMI: Non-Applicable

Background: An android designed to enjoy interacting with others. The more “complex” the encounter is the more pleasure she derives from it. So she works as a escort, for anyone who can afford her.

She’s technically a “Lilim” and prefers to be referred to as so. Android is fine for people not familiar with her product line. But ’*Robot’’ is an insult.

She is able to mod her body, for certain kinks.

If she were to die, the latest copy of her consciousness would be uploaded to a new body.

Miku Hatsune (Vocaloid) (Art By CuprumRus)

Female Android

Physical: 5,5 feet (165 cm) 123 lbs.

BMI: Non-Applicable

Background: A world famous Diva from the future! Or maybe from the past at this point.

Really likes chubby people. Due to a quirk in her programming.

She’s not shy about throwing her fame around, even if it causes problems.

Kinda a dummy.

Shirahoshi

Female Mermaid Giantess

Physical: 77 feet (2347 cm) 21000 lbs

BMI: 17,3 | Underweight

Background: A princess of the undersea Ryugu kingdom, and the youngest in line. Shirahoshi was born abnormally large for unknown reasons. Years after meeting the Straw hats, a live changing moment for her. She now swims the open seas, with a little bit more courage.

Even in her teens she was considered one of the most beautiful people in the world. Which led to her being kidnapped on multiple occasions.

She hadn’t actually left her tower much before she was over sixteen.

She is shy, despite her size and abilities.

Pearl Pygmy (Splatoon 2)

Female Inkling (Humanoid Squid)

Physical: 4'9 (145 cm) 90 lbs

BMI: 19.5 | Average

Background: The youngest daughter of an incredibly wealthy family. Pearl aims to become a musician who will change the world, with her partner and best friend Marina. She's doesn't like to use her wealth to flaunt over others, she'd rather help them out in anyway she can.

Has vocal cords that require special sound mixing as to not destroy the area tech near her music.

Has a foul mouth.

Is fiercely protective of those she considers friends.

TO BE CONTINUED AT SOME POINT

[hpdabbles]

Kindness and Remorse Part 2

The thing about being a toddler again is that Dudley finds it all rather embarrassing. He can’t walk correctly, his vocal cords are the bane of his existence, don’t get him started on the nappy changes and maybe worst of all, he had limited ability on his surroundings.

His parents, who he can’t help but resent, try their best to smother him in love and toys. He has to fight to keep Harry within arms reach, throwing the strongest tantrums his little body can produce the moment they so much as try to separate them. 

Dudley knows his mother is hurt by the way he squirms out of her hugs or the lack of smiles his father receives when the man makes funny faces at him. It feels like a cheap attempt to re-buy his love and he knows, on some level, that to these two people it’s not a son well into his mid-thirties their hatred and intolerance have pushed away but a toddler that doesn’t like mommy or daddy holding him.

But oh, do they try. They love him to bits even when he’s being difficult and always speak to him with such adoration it would be heartwarming had he really been a baby. 

There are times where he almost allows himself to start to forgive them but then Vernon sneers at Harry causing the poor little boy to start sobbing and Dudley remembers why he cut them out of his life.

It’s not easy, those first few weeks. Despite how hard he tries, and how many temper tantrums he throws some things he can’t stop. He managed to let allow Harry to sleep with him but it’s not every night and they are always quick to baby talk him into understanding the freak can’t be allowed in the good beds. 

He can’t stop the hissed words, the quick slaps and sneers they aim at Harry. He can’t make Vernon or Petunia return the toys they rip out of the little one’s hands. He can’t stop them from locking the boy, while he stands behind a playpen frustrated he can’t get the stupid thing open so he can let his cousin out of the cupboard. 

Even getting food or clothing is hard. Try all he might, stumbling around on his pudgy baby legs isn’t enough to reach the clothes or the food cabins. The moment the Dursley couple realizes what he attempts to do- “Oh my little angel is just too curious. No, no, no Diddy, you can’t go in there”- they start to buy those annoying baby gates and installing them at all major doorways. 

Nothing is more frustrating than being a mentally thirty-six-year-old man and losing to baby proofing of all things. 

Still, there are some small victories here and there. He shares the toys which bring him no joy with Harry, and the baby’s green eyes light each time. He always finds some excuse to hug his cousin or hold his hand. The temper tantrums do sometimes allow Harry to spend the night in his crib, safely tucked away in his arms.

Wherever Harry goes Dudley follows even if his parents are a physical barrier, he just makes himself so fussy they crumble after three or more hours of screaming which means Harry doesn’t spend too much time with them. 

Harry smiles at him too. Which makes all of this somehow worth it, if only so the baby has something to smile at.  

Weeks turn to months.

 Dudley does his best to make sure his parents understand that Harry is his favorite playmate, and there are times where they try to rip that away but he makes life very difficult for them each time. It’s not long that he starts to babble in broken sentences, and he stumbles a lot less when his legs start to get more strength. 

His speech is coming along better, by the time he’s two and three months old he’s able to make simple sentences. He tries to avoid bigger words because while he hates being talked down to, standing out for being gifted could mean he be place in higher schooling. 

Which means he won’t be able to help Harry. So he sucks it up and watches what he says, making sure to keep an eye on the telly for baby channels and repeat baby books his mother reads to him. 

He’s doted on by all of his parent's friends, who all coo and congratulate Petunia for such a smart and well behaved little boy. He guesses they like the fact he doesn’t grab everything in sight and actually stays where they tell him to. Heaven knows that when Daisy and Josh were tots it was like herding cats and there were nights where he passes out exhausted after trying to keep them from running around. 

All in all, he’ can say he’s nicely balanced. Some days he’s an angel and others he’s a screaming banshee. No one really bats an eye at it, thinking his good behavior out weights his bad. 

Dudley makes a face each time his mother starts spreading her lies about Uncle James and Auntie Lily, however, and sneers when the people of Privet Drive eat it up. It makes him sick to think their name is being dragged through the mud when they were murdered protecting their little boy.

“Oh, how dreadful. Drunkards dying in a car crash and then leaving you their problem? You must be so strong” says one lady. Dudley can’t remember her name but he’s fairly sure she lives at Eight Privet Drive.

Petunia preens just as Dudley stubbornly says  “Harry not problem”

Miss. Eight looks down at him with surprise on her face. “What was that darling?”

“Harry not problem.” He repeats daring her to say otherwise. Petunia hastily moves the conversation along with a quick  “Kids say the darnedest things don’t they?” even as his mother shoots him a long look. Dudley barely reframes form curling his lip back at her.

He looks around the little party that his parents have thrown for the neighborhood. They claim it’s to be friendly but Dudley knows that it’s his father's attempt to make good connections and to flaunt Harry’s money. Recently they bought a new state of the art grill which was wowing the group men surrounding the laughing Vernon.

The adults are scattered through the yard, some teenagers are giggling hunched over a table on the far right and much younger children who appear around Dudley’s physical age have all piled around the sandbox. There are four of them, and it takes him much longer to realize he knows two. It’s Piers and Dennis. 

He’s always known they were friends since young but had he really known them this long? The last time he spoke to Piers was when the man got married and moved away to Wales with his wife. Dennis was said to be released from jail in five more years with good behavior.

Seeing them now, felt odd. 

Staring at them he didn’t notice Petunia give Miss Eight a knowing smile before she gave him a gentle push.  “Why don’t you go over and play with them Popkins. No need to be shy.”

“Okay, mommy.”  He was halfway across the yard leaving the two cooing women behind when he realized something terrible. Where in the world was Harry? Stopping in the middle of the party, Dudley twist all around filling with distress at the lack of wild dark hair and green eyes, grabbing the attention of one of his father’s co-workers.  “What’s wrong, little fellow?”

“I no find Harry.”

“Is Harry one of your toys?”

“He’s cousin.” Dudley looks up at the man, his eyes tearing up without him meaning too. Curse his emotional body. “I no find him.”

“He’s inside, probably up to no good. He doesn’t behave well in crowds you see.” Vernon cuts in, smile tight against his co-worker's rapidly growing concern. His father's face pulls slightly and he adds on as if though it’s a great misfortune. “He’s mixed you know. His father was a gypsy.” 

Dudley faces clouds over in rage at the implication his father is attempting to make and he quickly gets very angry at the way the other man’s face twists with distaste. First of all, that’s not even correct. Uncle James was Indian, and gypsy is a fucking slur which is supposed to be about Romanian people.

Romania isn’t even on the same continent as India! 

Kicking both men in the shins as hard as his little body could, out of childish spite, Dudley bolts before he starts sneering at them for their close-minded awfulness. He hears his father apologize profoundly and it’s worth the stinging pain in his toes.  How could he forget how racist his father was? How racist all of this Drive were? 

He rushes inside, through the back door mumbling angerly under his breath. He needs to find Harry, the boy is only two now and he could get hurt if no one was watching him. 

Dudley finds him sitting in front of the washing machine in the kitchen. Harry is playing with some broken tin soldiers that his father had given him from Vernon’s old things. Pursing his lips, he tries to calm his rage as Harry happily babbles away to the little figures. 

Their tiny things, and if he were to swallow them, Harry could chock. Making up his mind he wanders over which caused Harry to see him for the first time. The toddler's face lights up, as he waves his tiny hands happily at him.

“Dudley, come play?” Harry asks offering the half-melted blue lieutenant to him with a cheerful smile. Dudley’s heart melts just a little and he pushes away his anger to sit down. He takes the toy in his hand before giving his cousin a stern look. 

“Play. No, eat.” He demonstrates the no putting this into your mouth by shaking his head when he makes the blue lieutenant tap against his lips. Harry repeats his head motion with a quick “No eat.”

Satisfied, that he understood, Dudley joins in on the game which turns out to be making the little soldiers jump up and down every so often. Harry is content with smacking his hands against them and making noises that could be considered sound effects. 

As they are playing, Dudley gets bored rather quickly and lets his mind wander. He hopes he can convince the boy to go draw with him instead since this toy waving is getting rather old, even if Harry waving the toys around rapidly is downright adorable.

Harry is in some of his old clothes but they don’t quite hang off his body as before. While before Harry used to drown in fabric, the clothing is now just simply lose in certain areas. Dudley is also happy to note that while he may have lost a few pounds, Harry is a little more filled out then he was the when he was a baby last go about. This time around Dudley isn’t nearly as chunky, mostly due to not demanding sweets from his parents as much. He’s thinner but he still has more meat on his bones then Harry or the other kids.  

Once upon a time, he would think about how disgusting his body was and how maybe that had something to do with him being cruel as well. After all, more than one person pointed out that he started to get nicer around the same time he started to lose weight. 

Tiffiny had been quick to beat that out of his head.  “You were mean because you chose to be mean. Your weight had nothing to do with it. It’s called coloration does not mean causation, darling.”

Sometimes he forgot his wife was raised by two therapists when said field was considered a joke. Other times, it just made him happy she was able to communicate her thoughts and emotions easier. She taught him a lot of neat tricks to do so himself. 

“Dudley? Come. Mommy and daddy outside” Harry says suddenly, standing up. He motions with his tiny hands to the noisy adults as he wabbles away into the yard.  Getting up and going after him, Dudley suddenly gets hit with a startling nauseating realization. 

Harry thinks the Dursley are his parents. He doesn’t remember Uncle James or Auntie Lily. Right now Dudley is most aware of them and he barely knows anything at all. Heck, Harry probably doesn’t even know he’s half Indian. 

....In his past, Harry didn’t know anything about that part of his culture, did he? Not a single thing. It makes the abuse they put him through more disgusting, adding a whole other layer.  How long did Harry feel out of place? Since in the future-past, it was said cousin that told him about Uncle James, at one point Harry had to learn what he was missing out on didn't he? 

Reaching out he grabs Harry's hand feeling very very sad. “Not mommy and daddy. Auntie and uncle.” 

His cousins stare at him for only a second and the baby bods his head obediently used to Dudley correcting him.  “Auntie and Uncle.” 

Giving the little hand in his hold a squeeze, he tries for a smile and it rewarded with another in return. Harry squeezes back his hand before they release hold. Together they go out in the yard where Petunia has been calling everyone’s attention for some cake. Dudley makes sure to pass his plate to Harry, after sitting the boy down at the sandbox. He keeps half an eye on the toddler who smears the treat half on his face, eating with his fingers in joy. 

Mentally, he starts to think of a way to help Harry learn more about his heritage. He has to admit that it will be quite hard when he knows next to nothing about it. Heck, he doesn’t even know what part of India, uncle James was from or what religion he took part in.

Did wizards even have religions? The Weasleys celebrated Yule and Daisy did say that Hogwarts did have Chrismas Feast but was that religion-based or merely festive based? Would Harry want to part take in these kinds of celebrations or would he prefer the Indian ones? Heavens was there a difference between them?

This was giving him a headache. He’ll think about it later he decides because right now he needs to focus on making sure Harry has fun while eating without chocking.  Just as he thinks that fate tests him. He looks upwards, asking for some patience when Harry drops his plate and attempts to still eat it covered in sand. 

“Harry. No, eat!”

“But Dudley.”

“No, eat!”

Harry's face scrunches up causing Dudley to mentally groan. He recognizes a two-year-old tantrum, after raising two children. Not to mention the party was long from over. Around them, people were throwing his cousin nasty looks, shaking their heads and doing nothing to stop the boy from eating the food on the ground. They're just feeling mighty tall for allowing it aren't they?  He sneers back at them the same moment Harry starts crying.

The adults' faces stiff and most turn up their noses.

What have they never seen a little boy cry!? Look away number Two! Look away. 

He feeds the rest of his slice to Harry to get him to calm down. After everyone leaves his parents lock up Harry in the cupboard for “embarrassing” them at the party and Dudley exhausts his lungs with all the screaming and crying this causes.

He’s straight-up dizzy from his tantrum but sadly his parents aren’t willing to let Harry out this time. He can hear the poor thing crying from his room well into the night. He wishes he could get out of his crib and go down there. Help him fall asleep because he knows Harry doesn't like the dark. The toddler always eyes Dudley's nursery night light with big green eyes the same way Josh used to be amazed by him shaking his car keys.

Or at least give him a teddy to hold on to since Harry was a cuddle bug to the extremes. 

He falls asleep thinking about how terrible it is that sometimes, no matter how hard you try, you can’t change terrible people unless they want to. His parents will continue to choose to be monsters it seems. He couldn’t wait for the day Harry got away from their toxic behavior. 

Unknown to him, his desire to just help Harry through the night bleeds through the floorboards and makes the little boy a soft large pillow that functions as a makeshift mattress. He calms down quickly since the pillow smells a lot like his beloved cousin. Suddenly his little cupboard is lightened up by dancing teddy bears and shaking keys above his head and the toddler watches them until his eyes lids are too tired to remind open.

In the morning, the pillow and lights disappear in a swirl of silver sparkles before Pentuina or Vernon could see it.   

[raijinhasverybigpecs]

THE RE-UP: Tu’er Shen, the Leveret Spirit 🐇

“While other gods may proclaim endlessly over the power they have over their domains, causing no end of trouble for their fellow pantheon members and their followers as a result, Tu’er Shen patiently and quietly tends to those who request his services with unmatched loyalty and dedication.”

Name: Tu’er Shen, the Leveret Spirit​

​Pantheon: Chinese, Minor Diety​

Class: Hunter/Healer Hybrid, Medium Difficulty​

Positives: Healer, High Movement​

Negatives: Hybrid Specialisations​

please click on the read more for everything else lol

appearance details 🐇

old (above) vs new (below)

so perhaps i made him a bara rabbit after all lmao. blame the new outfit and how much better it’d look if tu’er shen has big ol bitties to work with :^) it’s still the same hair as the ears work really well with that colour but the basically the whole face has changed to be a lil more Dramatic(tm). the makeup skills have also improved with new tu’er shen rocking more subtle eyeliner alongside some very pretty and shiny pink liner. the eyes are also another major change, they’re a pretty grey as it goes nice with his hair. i still love the idea of his eyes changing colour according to his mood and grey is just a neutral mood :^) anyways, yes he looks beautiful, yes you can compliment him!

outfit details 🐇

tu’er shen now has an in-game outfit!! yay 🥳 it’s been a while coming mostly bc i have no art or visual character design skills but i’m pretty proud of how this turned out lol. it’s super cute and p goddamn chinese if i say so myself but it’s still very hoe and feels modern enough to fit smite’s standards i feel lol. big thanks to @izahunny​ (who is dead on that blog but a clown on twitter) for helping me with designing the outfit, the back layers and lil extra dress fabric for the front bottom left corner of the dress were his idea and they make everything much more balanced 🥰 i didn’t add a weapon but he’s just using a bow, i might update this later if i care enough to add that lmao

abilities 🐇

(please note that i am terrible with stats and don’t care about how viable in-game he actually is, these are just general ideas and the stats can be changed lol)

PASSIVE - Protector​

Tu’er Shen passively grants a medium range aura of regenation around him to his allies, increasing their HPS, MPS and magical and physical protections by 5% of their totals for each statistic. Additionally, Tu’er Shen gains a 3% movement speed bonus every 4 levels.​

40 unit aura radius, 5% increase of total HPS, MPS and protections​

3% bonus movement speed every 4 levels, total bonus is 12% at level 20​

ABILITY 1​ - Passion Arrow​

Tu’er Shen charges his arrows with passion, amplifying his next basic attacks with a small AOE on hit or at max basic attack range and causing them to go through minions. If Tu’er Shen hits an ally while Passion Arrow is active, he heals them for a flat amount. If an enemy is hit the charges deal increased damage on impact and if they are hit 3 times they are charmed and walk harmlessly towards Tu’er Shen for 1.5 seconds.​

Cooldown: 10 seconds

3/3/4/5/5 charges, Heal: 50/75/95/125/150 + 30% scaling​

Extra damage: 10/30/60/90/120, Mana cost: 55/60/70/75/85​

ABILITY 2​ - Matchmaker​

Tu’er Shen calls upon his matchmaking skills to select and connect two allied gods or one ally and one enemy god with each other in a 55 unit targeter. If two allies are linked then their damage is increased by 10% and they receive a heal over time. If an ally and an enemy are connected then the enemy is revealed to Tu’er Shen’s team and the enemy deals 20% less damage to their partner. Additionally, the connected ally receives 50% of their enemy partner’s healing.​

Cooldown: 20/19/18/17/16 secs​ 

Duration: 6 seconds, Heal over time: 20/25/30/35/40 + 20% scaling​

HOT ticks every 1 second, Mana cost: 50/55/60/65/70​

ABILITY 3​ - Bunny Hop​

Tu’er Shen hops in the direction he is currently travelling. If Tu’er Shen hits a wall, player-made deployable or god he bounces off the surface, doubling his movement. Additionally, enemy gods are stunned for 1 second upon impact. Tu’er Shen can store 1 charge of this ability.​

Cooldown: 14/13/12/11/10 secs

2 charges maximum, range of 55 with an amplified range of 110 units​

Damage: 100/150/200/250/300 + 100% scaling, Mana cost: 70/80/90/100/110 mana​

ULTIMATE​ - Romantic Rush​

Tu’er Shen, after a short duration, channels the full extent of his love powers, amplifying all of his basic attacks with the effects of Passion Arrow for 10 seconds. If an ally is hit and they are at full health they receive a a health shield equal to half of Passion Arrow’s healing. On enemy hit, the charm duration is doubled but they cannot be charmed again while Romantic Rush is active. The effects of Matchmaker are doubled and Tu’er Shen receives a 20% damage buff if he is linked with another male god.​

Cooldown: 80 seconds

Duration: 10 seconds​

Mana cost: 80/90/100/110/120 mana​

lore 🐇

While other gods may proclaim endlessly over the power they have over their domains, causing no end of trouble for their fellow pantheon members and their followers as a result, Tu’er Shen patiently and quietly tends to those who request his services with unmatched loyalty and dedication. For he is not a god who takes to the spotlight easily, but one who will see his responsibilities through to help and protect those who he serves, an opportunity he was once not afforded in his youth.​

​Such are the origins of Tu’er Shen, the Leveret God. ​

​Once a young man known as Hu Tianbao, he fell deeply in love with a handsome imperial inspector of Fujian Province. Such was the intensity of his love that he looked upon the inspector while he bathed, peering at him through a bathroom wall. Tianbao was caught in the act, confessing his sincere affections for the other man in hopes of reaching an understanding. The inspector was quick to retaliate in violence, sentencing him to death by beating.

Underworld officials, seeing his crime as one of love, sought to justify his death by appointing him the god and safe guarder of homosexual affections. A month after his death, he appeared in the dreams of a man from his hometown – not as Hu Tianbao but reborn as Tu’er Shen. From this came the erection of a humble shrine for his worship and Tu’er Shen has dutifully served those who seek him ever since.​

​The battlefield of the gods is a strange place to find Tu’er Shen, usually one so far removed from the world of ugly violence and mindless bloodshed. Even so, perhaps love can soothe and heal the wounds caused by the warring of pantheons, or maybe it can even help end the war in some way. Knowing firsthand the true cost of thoughtless hate and violence, Tu’er Shen picks up his bow in the hope that he can protect even one person of those who cannot protect themselves in the war of the gods.

voicelines 🐇

god selection

“Tu’er Shen!” (duh)

introduction

“Is anyone in need of my services?”

“Let’s see what I can do.”

“Wonder if there are any cute gods around? Wait, no! Work first, then play later!”

“In their own ways, everyone here is fighting for love.”

(this isn’t an official one but as a joke it was highly entertaining) “Come on Season 6 let’s get sickening!”

abilities

ability 1 - passion arrow

“Fallen for me yet?”

“I’ve got you!”

“Coming for your heart!”

ability 2 - matchmaker

self/ally match - male gods only

“Our connection is strong.”

“Let your heart speak to me.”

self/ally match - general

“Together we’re stronger.”

“I’ve got your back.”

ally/ally match

“You’d make a good pair.”

“Another successful match.”

ally/enemy

“Swipe left next time!”

“This’ll end badly.”

ability 3 - bunny hop

“Excuse me!”

“Coming through!”

ability 4/ultimate - romantic rush

“Feel the love!”

low health

“I will not give in just yet.”

“I don’t mind playing rough, but this is a bit too much even for me…”

items

when placing wards

“Reveal their hearts to me little ward.”

“Any romantic confessions I should be aware of?”

when buying consumables

“Isn’t this interesting?”

“The colour is lovely.”

when buying offensive items

“I don’t want to harm others but if I must.”

“Love hurts indeed…”

when buying defensive items

“Will this protect my ears?”

“Hope this won’t slow me down.”

“Even the gods have to use a little protection.”

kills

when in a killstreak

“I can heal them later on, right?”

“Love never misses its mark.”

when killing a jungle boss

“That creature was awfully big…”

“Thank you for your sacrifice.”

when destroying a tower

“Love conquers all, man and structure alike.”

“Ack, that’s so loud!”

death

“You’ll never kill my spirit…”

“Love is eternal…”

directed voicelines

Aphrodite - “It’s a great honour to finally meet the goddess of love, I have much to learn from you.”​

Cupid - “Speaking from... past experiences, it seems as though you should work on your aim.”​

Jing Wei & Xing Tian - “I admire your perseverance in the face of insurmountable odds, we are not too dissimilar in that way.”​

Loki - “If you haven’t already, I suggest you pay Chiron a visit at some point. He is single after all...”​

Bellona - “Any luck asking Amaterasu out yet? She’s still waiting for you to make a move you know..”​

Raijin - “I’m willing to bet you’re more satisfying in bed than you are an opponent on the battlefield.”​

Bacchus - “I’m not the drinking type... but perhaps you’d like to come in for tea?’​

Achilles - “How’s Patroclus doing? Maybe you should spar with him more often, you’ve gotten rusty.”​

Apollo - “Playing the lyre isn’t the only thing you make look easy.”​

Ravana - “When I see you, the term ‘rope bunny’ comes to mind...”​

jokes

“I hope Cupid doesn’t get jealous of all the time I’m spending with Aphrodite…”​

“Technically I’m not this closely associated with actual rabbits, but the aesthetic was too cute to pass up.”​

“Considering what I’ve been through, I think I’ve earnt the right to proud of who I am.”​

“It is technically homophobia if you hit me. Just saying.”​

“The Jade Rabbit? He’s certainly cute... but I think there’s another rabbit who’s cuter.”​

taunts

Animation: Tu’er Shen draws a neon heart in the air, shooting an arrow through it shortly after.

“[Yawns] I think I might have a nap, perhaps that’ll give you a chance to catch up.”​

“You have an awfully big weapon there, are you compensating for something?”​

“I’ll show you why they say love hurts.”​

“Fighting for your overblown ego isn’t a good reason to wage war.”​

“Take it from a matchmaker, I don’t think anyone’s standards are low enough for you.”​

skin concepts 🐇

new tu’er shen body

floral fairy

squeaky clean, night corps, bunny server

country cowboy, casual, devilish

old tu’er shen body

kitsune, spring revelry, leather bunny

hello nurse, debonair devil 

old notes 🐇

this concept is super inspired by Kaios’ concept for Tu’er Shen (which you’ll find linked in the description of this post), i loved his ideas for rabbit lad and wanted to add more to the concept. my final kit concept is a lil bit similar but i think i’ve changed enough for it to not be a copy lmao. anyways, i’ve wanted a hunter support since i played tyrande a while ago in heroes of the storm. she was super fun and the mix of dealing strong consistent damage and still being able to support allies is something i’d kill to have in smite​

​tu’er shen is also a really cool god, and recently I’ve been prokoved by my mutuals making lots of god concepts when i haven’t made any in a very long time lol (if you remember my other smite oc you’re a real stan). obvs i don’t think hi-rez would do him justice and gamerbros would totally complain about the Gays™ shoving their unsatiable need for Representation™ down their throats and what not but it’s still a fun concept regardless!

new notes 🐇

he’s back and 10x beefier and sluttier looking than ever lmao. the self-insert squad may be missing plenty of people (y’all better come back like...) but it’d be a waste of time and effort to not do more with tu’er shen. also i love him so! i’m still kinda sad over twink tu’er shen being replaced by bara tu’er shen but it’s for the best, he’s v handsome now and big ol bitties in that dress? iconic. he does fit better into the male cast, the added beef makes him more attractive to basically everyone (he’s serving taric teas now lol) and he was a soldier so there’s plenty of reasons to make him a hunk. anyways... i don’t have much to say about the outfit than it’s flawless lol. it was interesting and p fun to make although i always feel awkward about posting drawn stuff in a serious context. it’s weird but i’m happy about the final product 🥰 i’ll try to write more stuff about him soon but don’t expect too much lol

links/resources 🐇

personal

headcanons (they’re a lil outdated in reference to his body lol)

tu’er shen’s tag

original post

my smite oc tag

other

kaios’ super cool concept for tu’er shen you should check out as it’s cooler than mine lol. his art of tu’er shen goes full furry and it’s kinda cute ngl

other links you can read for more information about tu’er shen: 1, 2

a beautiful short film about tu’er shen helping a guy accept his sexuality, gore warning towards the end

thanks for reading if you got to the end! please send asks or whatever, i’m dying for any excuse to talk about him lmao 🐇

[iampikachuhearmeroar]

y’know the one thing I hated while I was doing my arts degree, and still hate after having graduated from it, is the condescending statement/belief from people that “oh why didn’t you just do a more useful degree like maths or science???? and not your useless bullshit mickey mouse arts degree, which was never intended to give anyone jobs outside of teaching, anyway!” or some other horrendous bullshit, such as: “why didn’t you just stay with communication & media studies and complete the marketing & PR major???? you would’ve had a job after all of the unpaid internships you do throughout the course!” or whatever. (media and communications is abbreviated to m&cs further down in this post, just an fyi).

but, meredith. do you know that even people with science & maths degrees struggle to find meaningful work that’s related to their degrees? do you know that some of those people will turn to teaching anyway just because they feel like there’s nothing else that they can do??? do you know that some people (mainly me and probably quite a few others) just can’t handle maths past like idk year 6 level??? I would’ve been completely and utterly fucked if I even tried to set foot in first year uni science or maths subjects. even though some of the content did interest me.... (also there’s the fact that my handwriting wasn’t good enough for diagrams etc etc in maths & science- but that’s a whole other topic not for this post).

like I had to totally skip out of psychology/sociology and even the PR major, bc they required you to do statistics subjects.... where no matter what level of study I would’ve/could’ve done for those subjects, i would’ve still failed them spectacularly because my mind really struggles with processing and working with numbers. but that’s besides the point.

hey earl, do you know some people simply do not suit particular fields of “real world” or “practical” study areas like business subjects? trust me. I tried that one sem of marketing 101 and intro to management/ business communications in first year. and you know what I found? that my mind just could not take the complete and utter dryness of the content of marketing theory and, again, numbers. and that’s despite the earnest encouragement of my tutor, who thought I had a knack for marketing. i literally almost fucking died in that business communications subject... even though the lecturer seemed to like me as well. but as i thought further ahead into my degree in comms & media, i dreaded it. I absolutely fucking dreaded it. the PR stuff sounded as equally dry & boring (besides the point that every project was group work lmao) and so did upper level marketing subs in advertising/marketing strategy/various fields of marketing etc etc. i couldn’t stomach that lmao. and besides the point, the analysing of media just bored the fuck out of me too, for some reason. I just didn’t like the subject. hell, even my advanced diploma in marketing from business college was a fucking hard slog for me.

but when i sat in my english, philosophy, (kind sorta) history and -further down the track- creative writing subjects.... I fucking loved them. I was writing like I’d always wanted to. okay yes I did get pretty dismal marks in most of my philosophy and english exams or assignments. but I don’t fucking care. I was there doing what my mind was built for. if id tried another business subject, like intro to economics or even gone back to redo that “intro to management”/“business communications” (or whatever it was called) as an elective/as electives, i probably would’ve dropped out of either of them in the first 2 weeks. whenever i read those subject descriptions, they literally put me to sleep.

also, for the media and comms point. do you know that there’s loads of media & comms students that don’t get jobs because there’s just such a HUGE intake of students in those courses??? do you know that that the most popualr field in that degree stream (at least when I started that degree at my local home uni in 2015) was journalism & professional writing??? where literally EVERYONE was aiming to be a journalist????

I was one of the very, very few people when I began in media and comms, to outwardly say that she was there to do marketing or maybe the marketing & PR double major.... and everyone looked at me as if I was insane. “why don’t you want to be a journalist? I think journalism is so cool and that I’m more likely to get a job in that than you are in marketing or PR. you actually engage with real people in journalism and do meaningful stuff with the community!” was one of the utterly dumb responses I sometimes got from people in that course, when I told them the above. but you know what kelsey, or, trent? neither one or any of us are “more likely” to get jobs in media & comms... when you’re both competing against people with “proper” straight journalism degrees who might have more media experience than you- if you didn’t do an internship or do some uni newsroom/magazine or whatever.... or maybe more streamlined (if that’s the right word) media &comms degrees.... as well as generally competing against each other, in the same field, for the fucking same exact jobs. while im competing against commerce students doing marketing and PR and people doing the PR & marketing major in m&cs.

also in relation to the above, doing multiple unpaid or even severely underpaid internships in journalism, or even marketing, probably won’t fucking secure your chance of getting a bloody job, adam. just shut the fuck up. those internships may have helped you. but they most likely won’t help most people, theresa. because there’s only a tiny freakin chance that the place that they worked for will actually give them a guranteed job at the end of their internship’s timeframe or at the end of their whole degree. it’s a fucking scam lmao.

and plus, (not to be as rude as you were to me).... but why the FUCK would you want to go into journalism.... when it’s been debased so fucking much by media outlets like buzzfeed; writing nothing but clickbait bullshit listicles.... and is polluted by internet virality.... so much so, that more than half of the people my course had the career goal of being a viral youtuber or an instagram influencer???? like i’m sorry. this is a dumb asf course, no matter the field you’ve chosen to study.... and there’s no way that a single one of you will be a successful viral youtuber or an instagram influencer???? what on fucking earth led you to believe that????

like no offence. but there’ll only be a lucky, lucky, lucky few who get to be the next jennamarbles, ray william johnson, pewdiepie, lily singh, tanya hennessy, jeffree star, james charles, etc etc.... or hell, even friendlyjordies (if you want some satire & politics). and for instagrammers.... idek know them. someone list some instagrammers lmao. but my point still stands.

being an influencer or youtuber- both with huge followings- is a fucking pipe dream- as much as me being a hugely successful author is. it only goes to the insanely lucky, lucky few who have the right connections and the right digital savviness/finesse to grow to be uber successful.... or who started super early, before it was even considered a job title (like jenna mourey/marbles and ray william johnson listed above, and several others not listed who have big fan followings on here) and eventually grew to be the first original titans of the youtuber job title.

or again, they already have some type of other successful media career (like tanya hennessy is an aussie radio announcer. jeffree star had a short lived myspace music career in the late 000s mostly, and made cameos in emo music videos and LA ink at the time also, for example) so that they can successfully fund their youtube channels and/or instagrams as side projects or whatever, as part of their media portfolio.... and they also know how to engage and grow follower bases etc. because they already have an existing one. so it’s twice as easy for them.

tbh i actually entered the m&cs course bc of my use of this hellsite and all the weird trends it had and stuff.... but I eventually got over that as I realised that I just did NOT fit into that field of study. I realised I was too shy... and I also just hated the fact that I had to learn how to use twitter and wordpress and probably eventually snapchat & instagram 😂

i had also gotten sick of follower counts and “growing a following”- considering that by 2015, I’d hit over 3,000 followers on here, I think.... and I realised just what energy and time it took to build this blog.... and my followers.... that I just didn’t have the energy to expend on other platforms for the same thing lmao. like it seemed like more wasted time. I was tired. in addition to that, i also realised that i didn’t want to waste my whole fucking career on the internet worrying over a business’s/company’s multiple corporate social media channel follower counts and image etc.... when i’d done enough of that for myself on this hellsite lmao. doing that stuff with other students in the m&cs course seemed fake asf, especially when it came to giving feedback comments etc lol.

but do you know that one place where you don’t have to give a flying fuck about followers, post views/comments, and blog views? philosophy and english. lmao 😅. no one gives a fuck what you say. unless, of course, you have the evidence and the force of argument to back your pov up. that’s what I was about and am still about. I loved reading and analysing the many books I had to read (contrary to the complaint posts that I made on here lmao)- whereas learning about media and who owned what and how media is manufactured- just made my brain freeze. and although I didn’t do my readings in philosophy (lmao)- i enjoyed a good bulk of the content I had and the issues it involved. doing media & journalism subjects in the m&cs degree, on the other hand, terrified me, bc it meant I had to get in front of a camera and speak- which also scared me bc i look & sound terrible on camera lmao 😂. but I didn’t have to do that almost throughout the entirety of my arts degree (im obvs not counting class presentations in this lol). but do you get my point???

and also the teaching comment. don’t get me wrong, i know a good bunch of people go into teaching after their arts degrees... including many of my friends; and a load of the people I was in my arts degree with. but that is mainly because with other degrees like journalism or media & comms or whatever other fields that they overload into uni arts departments- have taken our job titles away, in a sense....

so, then you’re practically forced to either go into teaching, or go into something outside of your expertise; like idek human resources management/a MBA via a masters.... or, again into something like librarianship via postgrad study- so, that for the love of fucking god- you have a job title to whack next to your name-!!!-instead of just “arts graduate” or “english major” or “philosopher” that all mean fuck all. and that’s because those labels sound vague, unhelpful, undefined and useless; as that’s opposed to something like “teacher” or “librarian” or even “information specialist”. all those titles/labels sound defined, and have actual useful concrete skills: like coding, database creation and maitenance & information retrieval (amongst other things), for a librarian/an information specialist, for example. these skills are then translated into something that you can physically demonstrate to people.... unlike with philosophy and english where people perceive that it’s just “all in your head” and “doesn’t produce anything worthwhile” bc of your very obvious skills that everyone has of communication and writing. like idk. anyway.

anyway here’s my rant for november.

[muthaz-rapapa]

StarPre: Zodiac Forms

Now that I’ve got the good quality official art, c’mon, did anyone seriously think I would not ramble about the zodiac forms in another long post? :P lol

Crap, I should be studying my Japanese since I’m traveling to Tokyo next week (GONNA GO VISIT THE PRECURE STORE, WOOOOT~!) but I want to get this post out first cuz I know I won’t have time or internet access to do it later.

So let’s do this!

Taurus form – BRAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDSSSSSSSSSS

8D

This one I like best out of Star’s two forms (but Pisces is awesome too!) for that reason but I also love how they changed her short tutu-style skirt into an asymmetric, flowing one. And that cow pattern is to die for~! <3

The butterfly earrings and horns are a very nice touch as well! *chef’s kiss*

Pisces form – I can’t explain why or how Hikaru pulls off the mermaid look so well…but she just does, okay?

Maybe it’s the twintails.

Anyways, super cute! Adding a touch of blue and deep magenta to the overall light pink theme really makes her look more tropical.

Then there are the sea accessories and ugh! Sometimes when I look at this, I’m reminded of Mermaid Melody except the way Star is designed here looks a lot more fun.

Before I get into this, I just want to say that we can now celebrate Lala’s bubble shorts blooming into space dresses! Aaaaaahhh~ <D

Leo form – Y’know when I saw Lala go “RAWR!” in the movie trailer, I was like “This is it, if this is the last thing I see, I’ll be happy I lived”, hahaha!

Lion imagery is just so cool, y’know? (as Gelato can testify)

The wild hair, the crown.

Yeap. This pretty much confirms it. Lala is Space Queen. ;D

Cancer form – I’m simultaneously gushing over her crab hair, how much I love this shade of yellow green and giggling mad that she resembles a jellyfish more than a crustacean. xDD

*sigh* Really, I think Lala’s forms turned out the best. They faithfully captured the aesthetics of the Star Princesses while retaining Milky’s original design and without making it overly gaudy, too.

Lala, you are perfect! <3

Libra form – Normally, I would say that’s too crazy for even crazy magical girl hair but then I remember Felice’s Alexandrite form and how extra that was in all its Mother Nature floral glory…

…and I just shut my trap.

Still, it seems like Libra form had the least effort put into it.

I mean, yea, they moved some colors around (more like seeped the orange into the ombre of Soleil’s hair) and extended the reaches of her dress but it’s practically the same thing save for Libra’s hairdo…which looks more like a wig she put on that anything.

That’s just it. The dual cornucopia there catches your attention right away on how…fake it looks that it’s as if the rest don’t matter as much. Which is sad cuz the Libra Star Princess is perhaps one of the best Star Princesses based on what little personality we did get from each of them. And I just wanted to see something more creative for her form, that’s all. :(

Maybe it’ll look better in motion? We’ll just have to see if that happens in the movie. As of right now, this still picture isn’t really helping my impression of it.

Scorpio form – Much better. Absolutely adore the slimmer cut and my, does Elena look downright gorgeous with a ponytail! <D

I’m always reading about how “full of passion” Scorpios are and while I don’t let those descriptions get in the way of appreciating their characters, have to admit that “passion” was the first word that came to my mind when I saw Soleil in this form.

She literally looks like a goddess of sunsets. Beautiful.

Capricorn form – Still not sure if I’m the type of person who favors something just because I so happen to share a quality or trait with that one certain aspect of a character…

And I freely admit that the Capricorn form is not the best of bunch (though it’s definitely not the worst)…

…but it looks unarguably lovely regardless and I love it with all my heart because me is a Capricorn, after all~ <3

The tiny hearts themselves may be a bit much but it’s part of Capricorn Star Princess’s design so honestly, I have zero problem with it. They’re adorable~

Then I kinda squealed because Selene traded her umbrella/lamp shade skirt for a fancy bed canopy! LOL xDD

But most of all, it’s simply wonderful to see Madoka with wavy hair (AGAIN WITH THE HAIR!). Ooooo, gotta love that transition from light purple to fuchsia! X3

Like I said before, they made the Cures’ respective color schemes and the Star Princesses’ color schemes quite compatible. But that’s a given since they’re within close range of each other anyway.

Sagittarius form – Ok, I may have said Lala’s forms looked the best but I believe the Sagittarius form alone can blow everyone else’s out of the sky.

I mean, look at her! Isn’t she friggin’ STUNNING?!

The long side pony tail (*SCREAMS*), the mature vibe the long gown gives off and most of all, MADOKA HOLDING AN ACTUAL BOW AND ARROW AND LOOKING LIKE A WARRIOR MAIDEN DESCENDING FROM THE HEAVENS TO PURGE THE EVIL FROM THIS WRETCH WORLD!!

HAAAAAA……I dunno why I get so emotional over form changes, I just do.

Alright, first things first. This is not the place for me to spill my grievances about Cosmos in general so rest assured, I won’t do that. But I am allowed to say one thing.

Toei. I don’t understand your incomplete logic.

Cure Cosmos is a rainbow Cure. You either give her all twelve differently colored forms or you give her none at all.

Seriously, it makes no sense that she gets four zodiac forms, leaving the other girls with only two when we could have had:

1) the original starters with three zodiac forms each

2) Cosmos with either twelve (because SHE’S THE CURE OF EFFIN’ RAINBOWS!!) or one exceptionally glorified rainbow super form (with seven cat tails because RAINBOWS!!)

This is less about midseason Cure privilege (which Cosmos has heaps of) or the fact that they won’t be able to fit so many forms in an hour long special (it’s movie budget so piss off!) and more about not doing your math right to get the best, maximum output! xP

*sigh* Ok, petty raging done (for now). Moving along…

Aries form – As some of you may know, I’m not a fan of Cosmos’ rainbow skirt but I find I can easily overlook that (along with the cat ears, the flat top hat décor, the weird braids and the dorito clips) to appreciate the full picture.

And the Aries form may just be my most favorite out of Cosmos’ forms. Since Aries is the ram constellation, the white wool trim looks appropriate, especially against the crimson of her outfit. Frankly, I think Cosmos looks better in this red design than her normal blue-rainbow Cure form.

Then there’s the poofy (kyaa~!) hair that just acts so well as a backdrop to the ram horns.

Mm, yes, definitely my favorite. *nod nod*

Gemini form – Again, where the fuck were you when Met Gala was happening this year?!

Like, this would not only fit right in with the camp theme but could’ve won best dressed that night!

The only thing I’d consider getting rid of is the rainbow but then it’d probably look less campy so maybe not.

Anyways, I was the least fond of this form when I first saw it but the more I look at it, the more I’m learning to like it…??

The red cape (and cherry earrings) provides a sharp contrast to all the green going on, too.

Virgo form – Azure blue complements light pink and white in a very angelic sort of way. Pretty~

Cosmos’ hair also looks delightfully charming when it’s curled and has a flower decoration in it.

…That’s all I have to say, really.

Oh no, wait.

It’s extremely odd to me that Cosmos gets two zodiac forms that correspond to other Cures’ birthday signs and she doesn’t even get the form of her own birthday sign.

Hikaru’s is Aries and Elena’s is Virgo. Look who got those forms.

Yuni’s sign is Libra. That form went to Soleil instead.

…WHAT IS UP WITH THAT?! >:/

Aquarius form – Is it just me or do the rainbow pleats actually work here?

We’re dealing with water and the droplet beads attached to the ends really reminds me of the rain so that’s probably why.

Cosmos’ hair also looks mega good in waves, too.

And the stars~! Exquisite!

On another note, again she always comes as a strange package because if cats in general hate water, then pairing Cosmos up with Aquarius is the biggest mismatch of them all, them both having a blue theme be damned. xD;

~~~~~

*SIGH* Finished!

…Or not. One last thing. There’s always one last thing.

It’s just a real shame that these forms are exclusive to the movie. I mean, I know we all have our opinions on whether or not Form Changes are actually useful in the tv series (I don’t care, I just like looking at them and that’s reason enough for me)…

But the stock footage was severely underwhelming for StarPre so having these in the show may have done some good to alleviate that feeling.

Also, the Zodiac forms have a much closer relation to the space motif than the Twinkle forms do. Seriously, the most noticeable things about the Twinkle forms are the tiaras and it’s weird because we already have the Star Princesses. So WHY do we need to put tiaras on the Cures? They’re not aiming to become princesses themselves, they’re channeling the powers of the stars (aka the Zodiac princesses!) so they should take on appearance respective of the star signs!

Again, I really don’t understand Toei logic.

……AND ONE MORE THING! OMGODD

Is there anyone out there who tried to draw what the first four Cures would look like in the forms that went to Cosmos? And if there is, may I see them? Please, pretty pretty please please please?!?!?

[yume-x-hanabi]

Fractured Lives, ch.2

four years overdue

Title: Fractured Lives Characters: Gaius, The Chimeriad, others Pairings: Gaius/Wingul Chapters: 2/? Summary: It won’t be like last time, Elle thought, looking at the king’s friends. They were already dead in the prime dimension, so why couldn’t she give them a second chance? 

aka my “let’s save the Chimeriad” (well, at least one set of them) fix-fic, which until now I’d been unable to update because LIFE and MOTIVATION and, well, if you’ve followed me for long enough to even know this thing exists, you probably know why it took so long. Anyway, I haven’t forgotten about it, and am finally in a good place to start working on it again. idk if people are even interested anymore, i mean it’s been so long But anyway, here’s chapter two! I’d recommend viewing on external sites because Tumblr formatting is bad :p

→ AO3 (French here) → FFnet (French here)

Just like every afternoon at this time of the day, Triglav’s central station was crowded. Gaius was sitting on a bench, observing the comings-and-goings while eating a delicious chocolate croissant he had bought at one of the station’s food stalls. Now was the time school ended on the fifth day of the week—Elympions called it “sylphday,” he recalled—and the main hall was packed with students hurrying toward the platforms or taking the elevator down to the subway station. They were all impatient to go back home for a two-day break that Elympions called “week-end.” Students in Rieze Maxia also had a two-day break, which covered the first and last days of the week—in other words, the period of time when spirits’ influence changed. It was apparently Dr Howe who had proposed this tradition in his treatise on spirit artes education. According to Presa, the aim was to cut down on channeling at a time where spirits were weaker, to reduce the risk of accidents. Gaius had not immediately understood why, as he had never had any trouble channeling, whatever the day, but Wingul—who had listened to their conversation from a corner of the library—had explained that it was because he was always emitting too much mana, but that normal people, on the other hand, could feel the difference if they paid attention. At the time, he had thought that Wingul was simply making fun of him, but a recent remark from Musee seemed to indicate that he had been right after all. Unlike his two subordinates, Gaius had never really cared about the theory of spirit artes and had always trusted his instincts when he was casting spells. His artes may not have been as refined as Presa’s or precise as Wingul’s, but he had never had anything to complain about.

Gaius finished eating his snack with a smile. He often thought about his old companions. At first, remembering them had been painful. His castle seemed empty without them. His room, in particular, where he had enjoyed so many intimate moments with Wingul, now felt cold and lifeless. He had not slept well there ever since he came back from the Temporal Crossroads. But life was going on, and, with time, he was now able to think about them with a smile. He missed them all terribly, but these memories were now something he cherished.

He was pulled back from his thoughts by the ringing of his GHS. He took the device out of his pocket and opened it. The screen was showing a notification for a new message from Leia. Careful not to press on the wrong button, he opened the text message, and immediately frowned upon seeing its contents.

cya @ Luds apt asap !!!!!1!1 =O =O =O 

At first, he thought that his GHS was broken, but then he recalled all the times Alvin had complained about Leia’s “text speak.” She must have sent him a coded message. If Wingul had been there, he would have most likely enjoyed trying to decipher it. Unfortunately, he was gone, and Gaius had no idea where to start. He considered calling her to ask her what she meant, but he realized that he had never called anyone by himself—Rowen was always dialing the number for him. His frustration must have been obvious, because the young Elympion who was sitting next to him while waiting for her train asked him if everything was all right.

“It’s just that thing…” he said, pointing to his GHS helplessly. “An acquaintance of mine sent me a message, but I cannot read it.”

“Let me guess… text speak, isn’t it?” she asked with a compassionate look. “Maybe I can help,” she proposed. Gaius felt she was kind of laughing at him, but he nevertheless showed her his GHS. After all, what mattered was understanding Leia’s message. Perhaps a girl her age was better suited to deciphering it.

“Oh, that’s not hard,” she told him, “It says ‘see you at Lud’s apartment as soon as possible.’ I guess Lud is someone’s name? It looks important, given the smileys…”

Lud… That was probably Ludger. And if it was important, it was probably about fractured dimensions. He hoped that nothing bad had happened. He got up and fished out a few candies from his pocket and offered them to the girl as a thanks, then walked out the station. Ludger’s apartment was fortunately not far from there, a mere 30-minute walk. On the way, he got a text from Rowen, repeating Leia’s message in correct spelling. He must have realized that letting Leia handle GHS communication was not the best idea if he wanted the message to be understood.

When he knocked on Ludger’s door, it was Leia who opened. But instead of letting him in, she went out and closed the door behind her.

“Hi Gaius. I mean, Erston. I mean…”

“Leia,” he nodded in greeting.

She looked worried and as though she did not know what to say. She was leaning on the door, her hands behind her back.

“You and Rowen texted me about an emergency. What happened?”

“Ah, well, actually… I think I should explain before you come in and…” She gestured toward the door and shrugged, an uncertain smile on her face. She took a deep breath and started talking. “So here’s what happened: Ludger and the others went to a fractured dimension. There, everything started like usual, looking for the catalyst and so on. But then, at the end, it was the same as with Milla. I mean, the other Milla, not our Milla. Do you follow me? Elle brought someone back again, except this time, it was… well…”

She did not finish her sentence and looked at him hesitantly, as if she was not sure whether she should go on. That was enough for him to understand. His heart racing, he pushed her aside and opened the apartment’s door. When he entered the room, all conversations died down.

He had gotten used to seeing them again in fractured dimensions. However, he knew that these moments were fleeting, and that they would not survive the destruction of their world. But now they were here, in Ludger’s apartment, in the prime dimension… He did not know what to think. The situation seemed so unlikely that he was expecting the world to shatter at any moment and to be pulled back to reality. But this was reality. He was not in a fractured dimension. They were there, alive, in his world. In a world that would not disappear.

Presa was lying on Ludger’s sofa, her leg bandaged. Agria was sitting on the armrest next to her, holding to her shoulder. Jiao was sitting on the carpet below them. And Wingul… Where was Wingul? Gaius looked around the room, but his right hand was nowhere to be seen. Had he not come with them?

Before he could ponder about it, Agria broke the silence.

“No way.” She started shaking Presa’s shoulder and continued in a small voice. “Presa, I think I’m dreaming. I’m seeing His Highness right there, in front of us.”

They were all looking at him with wide eyes, as though they could not believe it was him standing here before them. In truth, he probably had the same expression on his face. To his left, in the kitchen, Rowen, Ludger, Elise and Elle were looking at them awkwardly.

He wanted to speak. Say something. Call their names. Make sure they were real. Maybe laugh and cry too, but it would be unbecoming for a king to cry in public. But no word came out.

Eventually, it was Leia broke the weird mood. “I’m hungry!” she announced loudly. Everyone turned to look at her, and she reddened a bit under their gazes, but did not sway. “I’m hungry,” she repeated, giving her friends a meaningful look.

Rowen understood and sprang to action. “Oh my, it’s almost dinner time! But there are too many of us, and I doubt poor Ludger has enough ingredients in his fridge to feed us all. Come with us, Ludger, let’s go grocery shopping. I will help you cook us a little something, like one of those soups you excel at.”

“Ah, well…”

“Are you coming with us?” Leia asked the other girls.

“Oh course!” Elise answered a little too cheerfully. “Come, Elle. Let’s go shopping!”

Rowen turned to Gaius. “Please stay here and take care of our guests while we are gone. We probably won’t be back for a while,” he added with a wink.

Elle stopped before him for a moment and looked like she wanted to tell him something, but Ludger grabbed her hand and they went outside, the others following closely. When the door closed and the room was silent again, Gaius got a chair and sat down in front of them.

“So you’re from a fractured dimension…”

“Yes,” Jiao answered, “Well, at least, that’s what we were told. I must admit I don’t understand much about that dimension stuff.”

“They explained everything, but it’s a little hard to accept,” Presa told him. “We’ve lost all our marks.”

“Everything is different,” Jiao added.

“Which is proof that we are in another dimension. But I think we will need some time to adapt.”

“I understand. I imagine it must not be easy for you to be thrust into such a situation.”

Agria, who until then had stayed silent, suddenly spoke. “Is it true? Is it really you? You’re not a dream or an illusion from the bi—I mean, from Musee?”

Gaius smiled. She looked a bit shaken, but she was without a doubt the Agria he knew.

“It is really me. From the way you are addressing me, I suppose I was also your king in your dimension?” They nodded in response. “Good. This will make things easier.”

A tense silence fell over the room once more. He had so many questions for them, about the circumstances of their arrival, about their dimension, about the reason they were still alive… And they must have had many questions for him as well. After all, being taken from one’s world must not have been a fun experience. Should he tell them that they would not risk running into this world’s versions of themselves? How would they feel if they learned that they were dead in the prime dimension? Should he wait for them to ask? He did not dare speak, for fear of losing control of his own emotions. And they probably did not know what to say either. However, there was still one question he could not help to ask.

“Is it just you three, or…” He did not dare finish his sentence.

“Wingul is with us,” Presa replied at once. “He… There was a fight before we came, and he… He’s there, in the other room. That Ludger guy lent him his room. He’s just resting.”

Without a word, Gaius got up and crossed the room in a few strides. He hesitated one second before he opened the door, then entered Ludger’s room slowly, trying to calm down his pounding heart. He immediately recognized the blond strand in the mass of black hair, sticking out from under the covers. He felt joy fill his heart at this sight. The man laying on Ludger’s bed was definitely Wingul.

He silently walked to the bed and knelt down. Wingul’s face was gaunt. He was terribly skinny and so, so pale. With a shudder, Gaius recalled the year that had followed the implantation of his booster. “What happened to you?” he whispered, brushing a strand aside from his face.

Jiao, who had followed him, was the one to answer. “He had a rough year. Erm… You know, his booster. And then… Well, anyway, he’s seen better days.”

Gaius frowned. “Does he still use it?”

“Yes, sometimes. We try to limit it, but you know him, he never listens.”

That was bad news. The Wingul of the prime dimension had died because of his booster. If this Wingul kept pushing himself too far, he might end up meeting the same fate.

No, Gaius decided. Not twice. Not here.

The possibility broke his heart. It had been difficult for him to overcome the death of his partner, even if he had been expecting it in a way. And though tragic, destroying other Winguls in a fractured dimension was one thing. But watching one die here in his world was another, and he swore to do everything he could to prevent it. Even if this was not his Wingul, he was still precious to him, and he swore to protect him, whatever may lie in their future. Him, and the others too.

He would have to find a solution, but now was not the time. This Wingul needed rest. Besides, he admitted to himself, he did not really want to have to explain how fractured dimensions worked. It would be better to let the others do it. He went back to the living room, and Jiao followed him. Presa and Agria were looking at them with a questioning look.

“What happened to your leg?” he asked Presa to change the topic.

“Oh, that?” she said, pointing to her bandages. “It’s broken. I fell…”

“Yeah, right!” Agria exclaimed. Seeing Gaius’ curious look, she went on, “She flew through the air during the last battle.”

“You too, actually,” Presa retorted, irritated.

“Yeah. But I got back up no problem, unlike you.”

“I just hit the ground at a bad angle, that’s all. It’s not serious,” she told Gaius. “Leia’s a nurse—ex-nurse, apparently, Agria interjected—and she looked at it. She and Elise healed it with spirit artes. They said that Jude Mathis will come and have a look tomorrow to check if everything healed correctly, but it should be fine. I just need to rest a bit, that’s all.”

“I see.”

Gaius sat back down on his chair and decided to start addressing the main issue.

“I imagine that you would like to know how different this world is from yours, and I would like to learn more about it myself. Let us start with the bases: I am king in both worlds, and you are my Chimeriad. Is it correct?”

They nodded.

“Good. Let’s see how similar our circumstances are. Could you summarize what you know about how I rose to the throne of Ajur and how you came to work for me?”

One after the other, they recounted events from their pasts and told him what they knew of Wingul’s. As he thought, their stories were identical to his own experiences. They must have come from a dimension that had followed the prime closely for many years. He would have to ask Ludger more details about its coordinates and the catalyst they had fought. The divergence most likely lied in recent events, after their meeting with Milla and Jude, as they seemed to know them. History must have started changing during the battle of Fezebel, he thought while looking at Jiao. The big man had been the first of the Chimeriad to sacrifice himself, and his presence here today was proof of the difference between their dimensions.

“What happened during the battle of Fezebel?”

“Well, like we just said, a tsunami totally swept over the battlefield.”

“I think he means the most recent one, Agria,” Presa corrected, “the one against Nachtigal. Is that right, Your Highness?”

“Yes. In this world, we fought against Rashugal’s army and took control of the Lance of Kresnik, which Milla Maxwell wanted to destroy. Is it the same for you?”

“It is so far, but after the fight against Maxwell, strange things started happening.”

“Was the Lance activated?”

“It pierced a hole in the sky!”

“Then Elympion soldiers invaded and attacked our troops,” Gaius concluded. It was what had happened next that he was curious about.

“I can’t believe it. It really feels like we are talking to our Gaius. All our memories are the same,” Jiao said with emotion in his voice. Gaius did not comment on that, as he knew what he would eventually have to reveal to them.

“How did you overcome their assault?”

“You know Ivar, Maxwell’s handmaid or whatever? That moron created a diversion to allow her to flee, and we took the chance to get away too. Foolish bastard. But at least he was useful.”

“Agria, show a little more respect. He gave his life to save us.”

“Ivar sacrificed himself?”

That was unexpected. So it was Ivar who had saved them that day, instead of Jiao. That was a big difference, but it seemed that history had not really changed its course immediately afterward.

“We met with Maxwell in the Xailen Woods Temple… Ah, did Elympions take control of Khan Baliq here too?” Jiao asked.

“Yes. We cooperated with Maxwell’s group to take it back, then launched an attack against the enemy HQ.”

With Ivar, without you, he did not add.

“Then we fell into a trap.”

“And Maxwell sacrificed herself as well. Was it the same for you, Your Highness?”

“It was. We landed, and then had to face Musee’s attacks. She wanted to keep the schism’s existence a secret, even if that meant killing anyone who knew about it.”

“Wait a minute,” Presa interrupted. “Musee attacked you here too? I thought…”

They all looked surprised. And yet, both stories had seemed to match.

“What do you mean?”

“Well, Rowen and Elise seemed to consider her an ally, so I thought she was on your side in this dimension.”

“She is on my side. She eventually joined us. Is it different in your dimension?”

“Yes, completely.”

They were looking at each other meaningfully, but none of them seemed ready to talk.

Musee… Her behavior was always hard to predict, which was probably why she was often a catalyst. If she had not joined him and shared her power with him in their world, what differences could this have caused? Had he not been able to go to Elympios? What about his conflict with Maxwell? Was the schism still intact? Had Milla reincarnated anyway? His head was filled with many questions, but he could not get any answer now, for the apartment door opened and interrupted their discussion.

“We’re back!”

The group entered the room carrying many grocery bags. The kitchen soon turned into a battlefield, with young troops that Rowen was directing brilliantly, delegating the various tasks needed to make tomato soup for eight people (plus a special eggplant one for Elle). Agria and Jiao joined the fight as well, but Leia forbade Presa from moving from the sofa. Elle entrusted her with the guard of Lulu to make her feel useful and prevent the cat from stealing any food. Gaius chose to peel potatoes with Ludger, jumping on the occasion to ask him about the fractured dimension. Ludger confirmed his suspicions and explained what had happened.

“Where is Musee now?” he asked when Ludger finished recounting the events that had led them here.

“She’s resting at Leia’s place,” Rowen answered him. “Since the Chimeriad are currently viewing her as an enemy, she’d better stay on the low for a while.”

The image of Musee lying low was rather amusing, but Rowen was right, she should avoid showing herself for now.

Agria cried in surprise when Ludger turned on the stove. This was obviously the first time they’d seen a household spyrix. There would be many things to explain… They had been ripped from their world and were now lost in a country they knew next to nothing about. At least, they were not alone, and Gaius was sure that Rowen and the others would do everything they could to help them get used to their new circumstances. They would also have to think about what to do once they were more familiar with the place. But those questions were a little premature. The priority right now was to help them feel at ease. Starting with a good meal.

“Enjoy your meal!”

“Mmh, that smells good.”

“Not as good as my daddy’s soup!”

“Really?”

“But it’s still good! You’re number two, Ludger!”

“Do you like it, Agria?” Leia asked, trying to include their guests in the conversation.

“Why are you talking to me? Last time I checked, we weren’t so chummy with each other.”

“You’re as charming as ever, I see.”

“Are you looking for a fight?” Agria cried, rising up on her seat.

“Agria!” Presa immediately reacted. “Table manners!”

Agria turned to her, a mean retort ready to leave her lips, but her eyes fell on Gaius and she froze. Blushing, she sat down and apologized in a small voice, which surprised Leia, who had never seen her act so meek before. Gaius felt his heart ache. How many times had he witnessed such a scene before, when his Chimeriad were still alive? He thought of the other Milla, who had been so different from Milla Maxwell. These Agria, Presa and Jiao, however, were identical to those he had known. It almost felt as if they were never gone.

“…us? Gaius!”

Hearing his name brought him back from his thoughts. Rowen was looking at him with a slightly worried look.

“I’m sorry, I was lost in thoughts. What did you say?”

“We were wondering where the Chimeriad could stay. Our dear Ludger doesn’t mind lending them his apartment tonight, but we should probably look for another long-term solution.”

“Indeed, we should not abuse his kindness.”

“Don’t worry about us,” Presa spoke, “we’ll find a place to stay on our own. We’ll leave as soon as Wingul wakes up.”

“With what gald?” Jiao asked her. “We lost all our belongings with our world. Besides, we don’t know anything about Elympios.”

“We should go back to Ajur as soon as possible…”

“No!” Gaius interrupted, startling them. He continued more calmly: “It would be better to stay in Elympios for now.”

What would the citizens of Khan Baliq say if they saw them stroll through the city as if nothing happened? He would have to think of a way to tell the news to the population. The list of things to do was getting longer and longer. This situation was sure to give him a lot of extra work.

“Don’t worry about that,” he added. “Taking care of you is my responsibility.”

“Your Highness…”

“We don’t want to impose…”

“It’s my job,” he insisted. “I will find us an apartment nearby.”

“Us?” Rowen pointed out, his eyes twinkling. The old man had tried to convince him to acquire a permanent home in Triglav for months. He personally did not see the need, as the city and surrounding areas were full of cheap motels—they were admittedly a bit seedy, but much cheaper than having to pay rent. However, he could not impose such a life to the Chimeriad, especially since they were so disoriented. Besides, this would enable him to stay with them.

“I will start looking first thing tomorrow,” he added.

“Don’t forget your business brunch,” Rowen reminded him. “You are to meet representatives from the Skylark Exchange tomorrow morning. I will handle the apartment hunt.”

“All right. I am counting on you.” To be perfectly honest, he would have preferred to let Rowen handle the meeting instead, but he could not go back on his word. These kinds of business talks could have an impact on the relationship between the two countries.

After dinner, he went to see Wingul one more time before leaving. The man was still in a deep sleep and looked like it would be a while before he woke up. “Convalescence doesn’t suit you,” he whispered, touching his face lightly with his fingertips. “Get well, Wingul. I want to talk to you.”

He bade the others goodbye and promised he would be back as soon as he was done with his engagements. When he went out of the building, he noticed that Elle was out as well. She was sitting on one of the little park’s swings, looking down.

“Is there anything wrong, Elle?”

She looked up at the sound of his voice, and her eyes teared up. She quickly wiped her eyes and looked down again, avoiding his gaze.

“I’m sorry,” she murmured faintly.

“Why are you apologizing? You did nothing wrong.”

“Ludger told me that what I did was ‘irresponsible’ and that I caused you lots of problems. He said I should have thought about what happened to Milla before I acted…” She let her tears fall freely this time. “But I thought it would be different than with Milla. I just wanted you to meet your friends again…”

So she had deliberately brought them back. It was not an accident like had been the case for the other Milla. That was something he had wondered. She must have gotten the idea when she witnessed his painful reunions with other Chimeriads from other fractured dimensions. He had always been careful not to show any emotion, but her childish eyes must have seen through the façade and noticed his distress. He crouched down before her and delicately wiped away her tears.

“Do not blame yourself, Elle,” he told her gently. “I know you only had good intentions.”

“You don’t hate me?” she sniffled.

“Of course not! On the contrary… I would like to thank you. It’s true that there will be some problems, but we can overcome them. It’s nothing compared to the chance to see them again.”

Elle’s face brightened immediately.

“Oh, good! I was afraid you’d be mad. You’re scary when you’re mad.”

He laughed softly. It was true that his strict look was intimidating to children—and even to most adults, in fact.

“I’ll never be mad at you. Not for this.”

“Pinky swear?” she asked, presenting her little finger.

“Pinky swear!” he agreed.

She giggled, happy with her new promise.

“I must go! Ludger is going to worry. Good night, mister king.”

“Good night, Elle.”

He went back to his hotel, his mind full of doubts and hope. Whatever happened, Elle’s choice would probably have unexpected consequences. But all that mattered to him now was to make sure that these Chimeriad could find a place in their new world, at his side.

As he expected, his business brunch was extremely boring. Skylarks’ salespeople were going on endlessly about their company’s successes, and all he had to do was nod and speak a few words of acknowledgement from time to time. He would have much rather gone apartment hunting with Rowen. He wondered what his councilor would find. Nothing too grand, he hoped. The old man sometimes had very fixed ideas on how a king should show his influence. He just wanted something neither too big nor too small, where he could help the Chimeriad get used to their new world. The businessmen were now congratulating themselves on their victory against a competitor. He felt his GHS vibrate in his pocket and had to resist the urge to take it out and check what it was about. Had Rowen found something? What district would they move to? He hoped it would not be too far from the station… though the port district might be good too. They would then have easy access to the ferries bound for Marksburg, from where they could quickly reach Rieze Maxia. Although, it would be best to avoid Rieze Maxia for the moment. He really needed to come up with a way to explain the Chimeriad’s return to the population.

To his relief, the meeting finally came to an end. The Skylark executives looked very satisfied and were already promising to organize another one. In his mind, he already made the decision to send Rowen to the next one in his place. When the last man left, he sat back down and took out his GHS, curious about the message he had received earlier. Surprisingly, it was not from Rowen, but from Elise. It only contained one single sentence, but that was enough to make his heart flutter.

Wingul woke up.

[blancheludis]

Chapter 2 is online!

Fandom: Marvel, MCU Characters: Tony Stark, Steve Rogers, Clint Barton, JARVIS, Natasha Romanoff Rating: T

Summary: It was supposed to be a mission without surprises, but then a building collapses on top of them and traps them underground.

Tony is hurt but doesn’t tell anyone. Steve just wants Tony to give a damn for once. And Clint, who cannot run away from their bickering since he broke his leg, just hopes they do not kill each other before they get him out of there.

(- Since the End is almost upon us, why not return to the beginning of the Avengers, when everything was still mostly beautiful and they haven’t yet hurt each other so much. Simpler times!)

It takes effort to keep his hand steady. It would not do much harm to have the line the laser cuts end up a bit wobbly, but Tony is painfully aware of Steve watching his every move with narrowed eyes. Maybe it is disbelief at what modern tech can accomplish, maybe it is simple distrust – it does not matter. Anyway, Tony has learned early on to calm the trembling in his hand, otherwise two of his favourite hobbies – being drunk and wielding a soldering iron – would have been mutually exclusive.

So his aim stays true and he cuts them a way out through the concrete. He is disappointed when his scans prove true and they are still underground, but there is light and more space to put between himself and Steve’s judgement.

“So we got out,” Steve says, utterly unimpressed, and turns back to Clint. “What now?”

Tony should let it go but he cannot help the constant irritation, thrumming along with his elevated heartrate. “Thank you, Tony, for keeping us from blowing ourselves up completely,” he remarks with sarcasm dripping from the words, trailing after Steve despite wanting nothing more than to go ahead.

“We can pat your ego later,” Steve chides, never even sparing him another glance as he kneels down beside the archer. “Think you can walk, Clint?”

Which has Tony rolling his eyes behind the safety of his faceplate. Does Steve expect Clint to hobble after them on his broken leg? For some reason, though, Clint remains patient and simply shrugs.

“If I have to,” he says, because working for SHIELD has trained all self-preservation out of him. Not that Tony is one to talk. “But I don’t know for how long.”

When Steve looks around, likely for something they can turn into a stretcher or at least crutches, Tony crouches down next to them. “I’ll carry you.”

“Sir,” JARVIS pipes up, a hint of worry in his tone, but Tony cuts him off abruptly, making sure he can only use their private channel for now.

New warnings pop up in front of his eyes, talking about stability and added weight and the estimated damage more pressure will do to his ribs. Tony dismisses all of them. Hawkeye might be heavier than he looks but what use is a metal armour that cannot carry a bit of extra baggage?

“Hop on, birdbrain,” Tony says, turning his back to the archer to give easier access. “And do try to not hit me in the face with your bow. I designed that to hurt.”

Clint at least chuckles as he pulls himself up and onto Tony’s back. It is neither elegant nor ideal since the armour does not exactly have convenient edges for someone to hold on to, but they will manage if they go slow. The whole time, Steve watches them with scepticism apparent on his face, arms half-raised as if he is just waiting for the moment Tony will let Clint fall.

“We need to get going,” Steve says, once Clint confirms his seat is more or less secure. “I doubt we’re suddenly all alone down here.”

They must look ridiculous, the robot and the archer with his splintered leg sticking out, but none of them feel like laughing. Tony turns slowly to the opening in the wall, taking a first careful step, all the while giving Clint enough time to adjust his grip.

“Why so pessimistic, Cap? Everyone else might have been crushed.”

Like they have almost been. Tony shakes his head. He truly does not want to go there. No more cave-in analogies if he wants to stay sane.

Shoulders tense, Steve walks past him, looking out through the hole in the wall, always expecting the next bout of trouble to find them.

“I usually don’t hope for buildings to wipe out people,” he then hisses quietly, causing Tony to groan. Captain Righteous naturally has to show compassion for the bad guys with a secret underground lab cooking up nasty things.

“I do,” Clint speaks up in a completely fake light tone, “when they otherwise try to kill us.”

At least one of them has sense, but Tony cannot let it go that easily. “Don’t blame Cap. All his murderous urges are reserved for Hydra and me.”

It is easier to keep talking than to concentrate on his steps. Carrying Clint does hamper his agility to the point where every movement jostles his broken bones. It is painful, but the pain will at least keep him on track.

“Silence now,” Steve orders briskly. And, with barely a glance back, he is gone, running ahead as usual.

The first hallway they find themselves in is deserted. Down here, everything is more sterile than on the upper floors. Tony notices the cameras mounted in regular intervals but is too busy with keeping upright to disturb Steve’s fixation on scouting ahead to suggest they find a computer and see what Tony can find out about their situation.

Right now, they are too loud – the suit whirring with every step, Clint’s bow clanging when it hits metal – and too exposed, walking aimlessly. If Steve hopes to just stumble over a stairwell taking them up to the surface, Tony thinks he will be severely disappointed. He is already sure that they are not underneath the original building anymore. The warehouse was big, but the hallway ahead spans a farther distance if his calculations are right – and they usually are. Still, he keeps quiet for the moment. Even he knows restraint and when he needs to stop pushing.

On their right side they pass a number of doors, each of which Steve listens at and pushes open to make sure they hold no surprises. They find machinery and dorms and store rooms but nothing out of the ordinary.

They stumble upon their first enemies a good ten minutes later: two men, both armed, one arguing with someone over his radio. So there are others. Tony thinks they should talk about this, make a plan before charging out into the open, but he holds himself back with a sigh when Steve raises a hand at them in a silent order to stay and crouches forward himself. The two guards never stand a chance. The first gets taken out by the shield – which makes too much noise when it hits a wall on its way – and Steve is on the second before he even realizes that his friend has just been taken out.

In a way, it is a piece of art to see Steve at work. The way his body moves, muscles flexing and hands reaching out instinctively, face pulled into a mask of pure concentration, not a trace of sympathy to be found. From an observer’s point of view, Tony can appreciate the flash of terror in the second guard’s eyes before he falls to the ground with a protesting gurgle, cut off when his neck snaps.

As much as Tony enjoys getting a rise out of Steve, he hopes he will never push things so far that Steve will look at him like this, impassionate and cold, with an intensity that burns through every armour.

Steve barely waits for them to catch up before he is ready to march on, new determination stitched into the line of his shoulders. It is like he needs to get out all the pent-up energy from being buried, however briefly. Captain America does not deal well with sitting around uselessly.

“Wait,” Tony calls, grateful when Steve actually stops, even though he turns around only reluctantly. “What are you doing?”

Annoyance flickers over his face. “We need to deal with whatever people are still down here,” Steve says slowly, as if explaining it to a child. “If we don’t find an easy way out, we can’t have them attacking our backs when we’re searching.”

Tony knows that. He also knows that he does not want to trail after an irate Captain America, who is put out by the fact that the mission parameters changed and turned his clean-cut operation into a mess. No one will say anything if Steve decides to wreck some punching bags once they are back home, but while they are still here they need to think more about how they want to go about this instead of just hitting everything until it stops moving.

“Have you ever thought about not barging in everywhere without a plan?”

Tony is angry, and hearing the somewhat even tone of his own voice, filtered through the armour, does not help, so he opens the faceplate to better glare at Steve who just stares back defiantly.

“We have a plan,” Steve says stubbornly. “Get out of here.”

If he did not have Clint hanging off his back, Tony would have thrown up his arms in frustration. “Great. So you want to beat up everyone in our path alone?”

Steve very much looks like he wants to do exactly that. “Last time I looked, there were at least two of us here that aren’t egocentric cowards,” he spits out.

Immediately, Tony regrets baring his face, because he is sure he cannot cover up his flinch quickly enough. Things would be so much easier if Tony truly were a coward. He would not have talked back at Howard so often. He would have kept doing exactly what Obadiah had wanted him to. Maybe Afghanistan would not have happened. But even if it had, he would have died there. And, who knows, maybe then he would have had peace, at last.

Well, he is not a coward. A great many other unpleasant things, yes, but never that.

Clint knocks on his armoured shoulder, likely in an attempt to get him to calm down. It does not help. Instead it makes Tony only more determined to not back down, to not keep running around without knowing where they have to go, expecting enemies around every corner.

“I’m not a battle horse,” he snaps. “If Clint’s going to stay on my back, I don’t know how much help I’ll be since my repulsors aren’t working quite right.” He sees the slight twitch on Steve’s face, clearly saying he is never of much use anyway, but Tony ignores it and simply goes on. “And if I put him down, one of us has to play guard dog anyway, since he can hardly run.”

Which would not be much of a problem. Tony can plant himself down like a wall to make sure nothing gets past him, but things have a tendency to explode around him and no one wants Clint to get caught in that. And Steve is all movement in battle. Forcing him to stay stationary will only dampen their effectiveness.

“Having your teammate’s back is also clearly beneath you,” Steve sneers, managing to momentarily stop all of Tony’s thoughts.

Tony almost groans in frustration, because that is not what he meant. Why does Steve always misinterpret what he says? Is it truly that hard to not always think the worst of him? Apparently yes, because nothing in Steve’s expression budges as he keeps glaring.

He feels his muscles go lax and his lips curl into a bitter, twisted thing that tries to be a smirk but falls horribly flat. “You really do think the worst of me,” Tony says quietly, almost to himself.

It surprises him, how much it still hurts. Ever since they first met all his fears of Captain America hating him have proven to be true, and still Steve manages to sneak past his defences and add to the disappointed pain amassing there since Tony was a child and still hoped for the Captain to become his friend someday.

Completely involuntarily, Tony takes a step back, unsure himself what use the motion has. It is not like he can actually go anywhere down here. For now, they are stuck together, until he can hide away in his workshop and lick his wounds.

“I’m so flattered that you’re fighting over me,” Clint pipes up, steel in his tone. “But I’m actually not, so could we please concentrate on the task at hand.”

Steve looks chagrined, making Tony glad that he cannot look at Clint, and that, in return, Clint cannot see the tightness of his own face. Because the archer is oftentimes more perceptive than people give him credit for, and all Tony wants is to wallow in his misery in private.

Before their Captain can say anything – likely an apology because everyone other than Tony gets those – Clint knocks sharply on the armour again. “What is your plan, Tony.”

It is somewhat mollifying to be asked this, no matter that Steve’s expression sours.

“We blow them to hell,” Tony answers, with heartfelt resentment.

He can already feel his fingertips tingling with the longing to create directed chaos. If he thinks about it, that is probably how Steve thinks about taking their enemies down one by one. The satisfying act of applying one’s mind and hands to get a step up. Then again, the tingling could also be nerve damage, because his arm is otherwise feeling rather numb. Still better than pain.

“What happened to no explosives?” Clint asks before Steve can, his tone much gentler, although he also lacks patience.

“We’re in a lab, right?” Tony explains, itching to get going. “It’s full of electronics. It’s a good thing then that you’ve got a tech genius at hand.” Steve radiates scepticism and even Clint is quiet, so Tony merely shakes his head. “Get me to a computer.”

It works wonderfully of course. Most of Tony’s plans do if he is allowed to follow them through. Once they find him a console and Tony’s fingers lower down on the keyboard, things start going right. For him, at least. First off, he can sit. He only notices he is out of breath once he does not have to press on; only feels the shaking of his legs once he takes the weight off them.

Clint sits in a chair to his right, settling his head onto his arms, and watches Tony work, although not with the same air of expecting failure as Steve does, who paces behind them, constantly keeping his eyes on the entrance. Tony does not remind him that he has hacked the cameras before he has even tried to get deeper into the system. No one will surprise them in here, but he guesses Steve cannot let his guard down any less than Tony can, so he does not comment on that, briefly thinking how much easier things would be if only they learned to be a little kinder with each other.

“What are you going to do?” Clint asks, purely out of interest it seems, so Tony flashes him a smile.

“Whatever I can.” He shrugs, for a moment forgetting that will only set off more pain in his shoulder.

It turns out, there is a lot he can do. With only a little bit of digging, he manages to pull up floor plans. Turns out he was right: the underground lab is much bigger than the warehouse upstairs. In fact, it spans several buildings. Unfortunately, it has few exit options.

Pulling the plans up on an extra monitor, he nods at Steve. “Look at these,” he says absentmindedly, not waiting for an answer before he turns back to his own work.

He does not miss the confused look Steve throws him, nor the short hesitation before he turns towards the monitor, but does not put in any effort to mull that over. If Steve wants to complain, they can do that later. He just thought Steve would appreciate getting a better understanding of where they are and where they have to go. Does he not always preach about strategy?

Next, Tony does simple recon. Scrolling through the cameras, he finds everyone still down here with them, adding their position to the floor plans. It adds up to twenty-three people, not all of them guards. Some are scientists, but Tony knows better than to underestimate people in lab coats. About a third of the cameras are not working, which he supposes is due to them being caught in the blast, so he strikes out the rooms on the floorplan.

He also finds their way out. It is caved in too, naturally, because nothing can ever be simple. Several people have gathered around the useless stairwell, gesturing, likely discussing how to get out. They have not yet started digging, but they do not look too distressed about it either.

Most of the others are working frantically, gathering data, collecting stacks of papers and notebooks. Where he can, Tony interrupts their tries to download from the servers, but while they are down here they should probably take care of the paper trail too. And once he is not busy scamming their signal, he should make a copy of their data to peruse later.

“All right,” Tony says once he is satisfied with his findings. He turns his chair around to face his teammates, ignoring how the movement makes him dizzy. He thinks he might be getting worse but does not dare checking with JARVIS. Surely the AI will inform him before he is about to drop unconscious – or dead.

“I suggest we go room by room,” Tony begins, pointing out a possible way along the rooms on the monitor. “I’ll start a distraction. You,” he gestures at Steve, “go in and take them out. That way Clint can stay back out of immediate danger, and we know exactly where everyone is at any time. Little room for surprises.”

Tony is ready to go into more detail, because he thinks this is a good plan, one they should not dismiss just because it is him who proposed it. He does not accuse Steve of being petty, but most of their arguments start because Tony has his own mind.

To his surprise, Steve just nods. “Let’s go for the ones we can take out quietly first. Keep the large group for last.”

It is almost fun; could be fun, if it were not for the fact that Tony is hurting all over and there is still no blue sky above him. But they work perfectly together. Tony waits until Steve is in position then does his special brand of mayhem: he sends high-pitched noises through loudspeakers loud enough to put the inhabitants of a room momentarily out of commission; he has machines clattering and throwing up panicked alarms; he hacks into the comms; he has consoles throwing sparks. Whenever he gives the word, Steve goes in. Watching on the grizzly screens is not as beautiful as the real thing, but he still gets to unabashedly watch Steve in action. Clint’s face of increasing disbelief is just a bonus. Really, they should see what he can do when he is not in pain and has time to spare.

Steve even comes back to them before tackling the large group, although Tony was half-certain he would simply plough on. It is better this way, since Tony is sure that a bit of adrenaline is just the right thing to keep him on his feet for a bit longer.

They must make for a hilarious picture: Captain America slightly ruffled but with anger burning in his eyes, a limping Iron Man with more dents than unblemished metal, and Hawkeye on his back, wielding his bow with a vengeance, barely hindered by being carried around. So, despite barging in without bothering with any secrecy, they have the element of surprise. The guards are looking at them slack-jawed before they truly realize what is happening. The fight is over almost as soon as it has begun, leaving them without enemies and still no way out.

Clint laughs as he slides down Tony’s back to the ground, poking one of the downed guards with his bow for good measure. Tony, in turn, staggers because of the sudden loss of weight.

“Everything all right?” Clint asks, noticing how unsteady Tony is.

Keeping his right arm very still, Tony waves him off. “Just missing a little victory drink,” he quips, wishing for something to numb the pounding of his head.

Unfortunately, they have talked loud enough to alert Steve, who has gone off to examine the rubble-blocked stairwell. His face morphs from worry into unmitigated anger. He takes in the shakiness of Tony’s legs and how he seemingly cannot quite keep upright.

“Are you having withdrawal symptoms?” Steve asks incredulously.

Tony cannot actually blame him for coming to this conclusion, because, yes, he does drink a lot, more again since Pepper left him, and one look into any newspaper paints an ugly picture of his unreliable ways. But he has tried to never let his vices interfere with Avenger business. He even implemented a security protocol that prevents him from navigating the suit while drunk. Tony is capable of learning from his mistakes, thank you very much. But of course no one gives him the benefit of the doubt.

“Nah,” he drawls lazily, steading himself against a wall, not caring how it looks. “The suit is prepared for that.”

If anything, Steve’s face turns more disgusted. “You’ve got alcohol with you?”

“Always be ready for a party.” They cannot know that, but he quotes his mother here. Maria, who was responsible of the ungrateful task of keeping up the Stark family’s reputation, who taught him how to make an impression. Because even a bad impression is better than going completely unnoticed.

Thanks, mum, Tony thinks as he watches Steve’s opinion of him sink even lower. He huffs in resignation and turns to inspect the cave-in as well, if only to avert his face so he does not have to see the look Steve and Clint are undoubtedly sharing right now. For good measure, he closes the faceplate again. He can always blame that on having to do more scanning.

This team thing has turned out harder than he has expected it to. Most of the time it is going well. They have regular slumber parties, watch movies and have food fights. That almost feels like family, like something he has been wishing for even before he realized that Howard’s opinion of him would never change. It is nice to stumble out of his workshop, pleasantly exhausted, and find someone in the kitchen to share a word or two with, who prepares coffee when they see him coming. The fighting, too, is a surprisingly coordinated thing. They just fit, and he never knew he missed having someone watching his back until they started deflecting bullets intended for him.

It is the moments in between that are difficult. All of them are damaged in their own way. Worse, they are all used to go on anyway, to pretend everything is fine. Settling into trust is not easy, especially not when one was taught to depend only on oneself.

So, Tony knows he is not the most compatible being. Social niceties usually fly right over his head. But for all his trying to be better, he sometimes sees it clearly in Steve’s eyes that he will never get there.

“Well, we won’t be getting out this way,” Tony mutters, staring at the results of his scanning. Digging here would just bring more and more rubble down on them. And he has had enough of that.

It takes a while for the other two to react, but Tony still does not turn around. He is giving them space, just like Rhodey does with him when he is in an explosive mood. It usually works, since Tony burns bright but quickly. Captain America, on the other hand, can simmer and hold a grudge for years if someone insulted his delicate sense of right and wrong, Tony is sure of that.

“Maybe we should just wait here until they break through from the outside,” Clint finally speaks, tone carefully neutral. Tony still whirls around as if he has been showered with more accusations. “Nat’s out there, she’ll get us out. And it lowers the chances of us making everything worse by digging blindly.”

Inwardly, Tony curses. What Clint is saying makes sense, but in an unacceptable way. Tony is not actually in a position where he can sit around idly, waiting to be rescued. At some point during the short fight, his vision has stopped clearing when he remains still, and he feels the kind of exhaustion tugging at his mind that has him fearing he will fall unconscious sooner rather than later. It is only the suit and decades’ worth of experience with stumbling around drunk that keeps him standing at all.

“Where’s your sense of adventure?” Tony quips, infusing humour in the hopes to cover the sharpness of the words. The voice modulator, at least, does not translate the slight trembling, so it could be interpreted as dismissive instead of an almost-plea.

“Must be buried around here somewhere,” Clint answers dryly. He leans back lazily against the wall but there is no mistaking his tiredness. He is pale and sweating and holds his broken leg gingerly.

“I’m with Clint,” Steve says, surprising no one. “I can make a sweep to see whether I can find something helpful, but we shouldn’t make things worse.”

He stands stoically to the side, close enough to Clint in case the archer needs assistance, but with a telling distance between him and Tony. Not that Tony is particularly unhappy about that. The more irritated Steve is with him, the lesser are the chances of him looking too closely and seeing something Tony does not want him to see.

Despite himself, Tony says, “You shouldn’t go alone.”

He has checked the cameras and they have taken out everyone he has found. But this is a secret underground lab, there are bound to be surprises. And while Steve is more than able to take care of himself, Tony does not want him wandering off alone. There is also the small concern that Tony does not know how much longer he will be able to defend Clint and himself if it comes to that.

“Do you suggest we leave Clint defenceless?” Steve’s voice turns scathing, and for a short moment Tony just wishes he could tell the truth, that their concerns align. “He is hurt.”

Tony wants to shout back I am too, but he does not because that would not change anything and he does not want Steve to think of him as even more of a liability. All they need is to get out of here. Everything else will fall into place. It usually does.

“I’ve got a broken leg,” Clint points out, annoyed at being discussed as a problem. “That doesn’t make me the damsel in distress here.”

No, Tony thinks, given a little more time that will be him. But he sees the wary line of Clint’s back and is, momentarily, ashamed. Steve and his bickering is thoroughly unfair on the archer, on top of him being all but immobile and in pain. But so is Tony, and he does not have the energy of keeping upright and thinking of a way out of here, while also keeping the peace with Steve.

Accentuated by the panicked red blinking of the HUD and the constant ring of warnings, all of Steve’s words and looks and twitches become more unbearable by the minute. Tony knows he is found lacking in the Captain’s eyes. But, well, he is lacking in his own too, but he is trying. He really is. And all he wants now is to go back to the surface so he can see the sky before he passes out. Or, preferably, not pass out at all until he is safely out of sight in his workshop, where he is not vulnerable. But there is not denying that he is fading quickly.

“JARVIS,” Tony says in the privacy of the suit. “We got another dose for the pain?”

It is not the smartest thing to do, dosing himself. Especially since the pain keeps him somewhat grounded in reality, but it also slows his mind. More so than the morphine does.

“Your breathing is already –” JARVIS naturally tries to argue, but Tony does not have the patience for fights on every front.

“I know,” he interrupts his AI not very gently. “Rib meet lung. Not ideal. But if I pass out and stop breathing, you are welcome to initiate countermeasures.”

By which he means for JARVIS to administer naloxone, to counteract the respiratory depressive morphine. He is not naïve enough, however, to believe that JARVIS does not take this as permission to finally alert someone to his battered state of health. Tony swallows and deliberately does not contradict him. Despite his self-neglecting behaviour, he really has no desire to die in what could just as well be a re-enactment of that cave in Afghanistan. With a significantly less amount of water, although Steve’s constant doubts are their own kind of torture.

“Just a bit, J,” Tony sighs, wondering for the umpteenth time why he has given his machines and lab assistants the ability to talk back. “We need to get out of here and I won’t be of any help if I can’t think.”

JARVIS is the one person who knows Tony best. One might argue that this does not mean much, since his grasp on human emotions is still rather tenuous, but he has grown so much since he first came online, surpassing even Tony’s wildest dreams. Where Tony is still wont to shut out Pepper and Rhodey, JARVIS has seen so many of his lows, has picked him up and given him something to hold onto, even if it is only the voice of his old family butler. He trusts JARVIS, and not just because loyalty to him is an integral part of his code. He likes to think they have grown beyond that.

Moments later, Tony feels the prick of a needle – a feature he has built in early on, when his heart used to give him more trouble, which could prove fatal in battle. Incidentally, he has not told anyone about it, knowing neither of his friends or teammates would approve of his portable med bay.

The morphine helps, if only minimally. It is mostly just the thought that he has done something to keep him going. It does not do anything against the crushing weight of Steve’s balled disapproval meeting him when he looks up again.

Tony sighs, still inaudible to the two men with him. What has he missed now? Yes, he has tuned them out for a moment there mostly because it is all but impossible to concentrate on more than one thing at once at the moment – which is truly ridiculous, considering how his brain usually works – but it was his turn in the argument, yes? And surely Steve appreciates his silence more than whatever snarky answer he would have given otherwise.

“Let’s keep going,” Tony says, as much to them as it is an order to his own body. Don’t fail me just yet.

He starts to make his way over to Clint to pick him up again, but Steve’s hand on his shoulder stops him. He does not feel the contact through the suit, but it is nonetheless jarring. Everything Steve does is when it is directed at him.

“We haven’t yet decided whether we should go on,” Steve bites out between clenched teeth, glaring.

Any other time, Tony might have laughed. This would not be the first time that Tony continued an argument within his own head only to think it resolved when he emerged. Steve has never appreciated that.

“Cap,” he sighs, drawing out the name like a prayer. “We’re in an underground lab filled with unknown machines and substances, and a building just fell on it. There’s no guarantee, but there could be an unwanted reaction – chemical leak, explosion, whatever. I just don’t want to be down here for it.”

He is likely exaggerating, but no amount of arguing will move Captain America if he has made up his mind, so Tony has to introduce new variables. For all he knows there could have been something volatile caught in the blast in some of the collapsed rooms, even though he did not find anything immediately alarming when he went through the surveillance cameras. So it is not a lie. Just an embellishment to heighten his chances to get out of here.

Rather stoically, Steve stares first past Tony’s shoulder then right at him before he jerks his head in what must be a nod, because he turns around and starts walking, leaving Tony to gather up Clint and scramble after him.

“You shouldn’t push him so much,” Clint says quietly while he climbs back onto Tony’s back.

“Someone has to,” Tony answers cheerfully, glad that no one can see his grimace. Half of their arguments are not actually voluntarily on his part, although everyone expects by now that they have just fallen into the habit of shouting each other as a valid means of communication. But Tony wants to get along with Steve, still carries that childhood wish in his heart to prove his father wrong. It is just not very likely that it will ever happen.

[letsdothistom]

Air Guitar and 85 MPH!

I was going to spend my second “blog” discussing pretentiousness in Santa Fe or New Mexican food and green chile in general.  But since I came up with something a little more fun, I guess I’ll save the talk about ordering water in a bowl and drinking it with a spoon for a different time.  On my drive back to Oklahoma I thought of a topic that always shows its face when I’m on a road trip.   I often forget about it until the next time I’m in the car or just don’t put much thought into it once I’ve opened the car doors and let the dog out to deal with his pent up energy as I unload the car.  Not to mention the obligatory hour I have to spend re-aquainting myself to the cat, who is certain that I have disappeared forever this time.

The topic that came to me is road trip songs.  

I love road trips.  You may think I’m crazy but settling into the driver seat, snacks on the passenger seat,  the basset hound panting in my face, his front feet on the console, anticipating our newest adventure, is the best.  Within a pretty short time, he tends to realize that this is just another day-long roady and roughs up his blanket in the backseat and settles in for the ride. Giving me weird basset hound glances in the mirror.  Not sure if it’s the music or he just wants some pork rinds.

Now these road trips of mine usually arent extravagant or exotic.  Unless you consider driving state highways through Kansas, Oklahoma, Wyoming or any other of the fly-over states I tend to travel as being exotic. (Personally I’d choose these drives over just about any other you could propose to me).  The great thing about these road trips, aside from seeing so many wonderful historically relevant places (as well as plenty of non-relevant places), and feeling a oneness with wide open spaces, is the time you get to yourself to hone your listening skills.  

Those of you that know me, know that I have many preferences when it comes to music.  As Cheech says in Up In Smoke, “we play everything from El Chicano to Santana”.  I love it all.  Some more than others, but I probably have a song or two from every type of playlist or genre that you can think of.  Add to that the fact that if there is a specific location I’m aiming my car to (often there is not), I will jam songs from or about that location.  For instance, while driving the empty roads of New Mexico it will be Ennio Morricone and The Good, The Bad and the Ugly soundtrack.  Wyoming is of course Chris LeDoux country.  On my way to Kansas City to eat BBQ, it’s Joe Williams singing “Kansas City” or Charlie Parker and K.C. Blues.  Memphis is Sister Rosetta Tharpe (you can keep Elvis, I am not a fan.  Yeah, I said it).  West Texas?  Marty Robbins Gunfighter Ballads, of course!  Down south, it’s Big Maybelle, Lightnin’ Hopkins and Muddy Waters.  You get the idea.  It may seem strange but there is something that touches my soul in listening to those songs that are native to an area.  Whether or not I actually do learn anything, it feels as though I have.

With that weird little eccentricity out of the way, let me add that of course there are some staples of any road trip, for me at least.  These are songs, albums and artists that I listen to, to fill in all the  empty spaces of those relatively uneventful miles, musically or otherwise.  Maybe it’s Def Leppard or ACDC or Beyonce or Ariana Grande for you.  For me these are easy.  I can not even begin to guess how many miles have been eaten up by Merle Haggard, or The Count Basie Orchestra.  I am not scared of extreme opposites.  Hundreds upon thousands upon tens of thousands of miles have been chewed up by these two musical groups, and yes, I’m aware that I am probably the only person living who can claim that.

The millennials reading this will have no idea about this next category.  There use to be these things called albums.  Albums were a group of songs, recorded (usually around the same time), and released as a unit to the masses.  These units were sold as vinyl records, cassette tapes, 8-tracks, or CDs.  Those of us a little older can attest that 90 percent of these albums had 2-4 songs that we liked and a bunch of other average or barely tolerable songs that you listened to whether you liked them or not (if you didn’t have control of the radio in the car).  Sometimes, you even grew to enjoy a few of those songs.  On rare occasions though, you found an entire album, yes the whole thing! that you enjoyed.   For all of us oldies, these albums are near and dear to our hearts.  They vary from person to person, but these are a few I can put on and just let them play, enjoying almost every song:  Van Halen-1984, Blood Sweat and Tears-Greatest hits, Nirvana-Nevermind, George Strait-Strait From The Heart, Muddy “Mississippi” Waters-Live, Art Blakey-Moanin’,  U2-Joshua Tree, Miles Davis-Kind of Blue, Steve Miller Band-Greatest Hits 74-78, IceT-Greatest Hits to name a few of my favorites.

All of these categories are important to a good road trip.  You must have a combination of all of them.  Yeah, I know, all of you XM/Sirius users are claiming that you don’t need any of them.  You got genres on every channel, and all you ever need with all those fancy channels.  To those of you in that camp, I say “HOGWASH!”  Why Hogwash?  Well no matter how specific these channels are, or how much you enjoy the carefree toggling between your favorite genres, no road trip is complete without those irreplaceable, epic, nostalgic songs that nearly blow out your speakers and get your ears ringing whenever you choose to rock them.  And how the hell are you supposed to play these favorites 2, 3, 10 times in a row with your XM radio?!  You can’t. So without further palaver, I’m gonna lay my favorites out and would love to hear some of yours.  

Rich’s top 20 Road Trip Jams (if you have any sense, you will build this playlist!-yeah I know it’s not gonna float everyone’s boat but if nothing else, listen to it, you might find some music that you don’t normally dig.)  And for the record, none of these songs ever get bumped off the list, new ones just get added to it occasionally.  As weird as it may be, here is my list:

Honorable Mentions.  These songs get me thinking about all the great road trip songs and my musical wheels start turning.  It’s on when I hear any of these songs.

Runnin on Empty-Jackson Browne, Hello Walls-Faron Young, Blues in Hoss Flat-Count Basie, Night In Tunisia-Ella Fitzgerald, Gimme All Your Love-Alabama Shakes, Miles and Miles of Texas-Asleep at the Wheel, China Grove-Doobie Brothers, Come Down-Anderson Paak, Crosstown Traffic-Jimi Hendrix, El Paso-Marty Robbins, Ida Red-Bob Wills and Sunshine of Your Love-Cream.  Those get me started but here is when it gets real.

20-16  These are like the kindling for me.  Getting the fire lit, and starting my descent into the next hour of driving, without really remembering the road I’ve just driven or the scenes outside the window.  

20)  Suavecito-Malo   Ok, Ok, it wouldn’t seem like a fire starter, but...

19)  Magic Man-Heart This one should get your blood flowing

18)  Keep on Rockin’ Me-Steve Miller The best roady to choose from SMB

17)  Watermelon Man-Herbie Hancock You might not have soul if you don’t love this

16)  When My Train Pulls In- Gary Clark JR Great Long Jam.  incredible guitar riffs

11-15  These are a small step up, adding logs to my fire

15)  Me and Mrs. Jones-Billy Paul So there’s always a song that you love to sing while you are alone in your car, and you think you sing it just as well as the artist

14)  Stairway to Heaven-Led Zeppelin Ok so of course I have it, but this is a really, really great song no matter how many times it is played.

13)  Ev’ryday I have the Blues-Count Basie and Joe Williams The definition of a foot stomper.

12)  Luckenbach, TX-Waylon and Willie One of the best country songs translates to a great road song.

11)  The Story- Brandi Carlisle Not a song liable to be on many lists, road trip or not.  My sister introduced me to this years and years ago and it barely misses the top 10

6-10  Ok, we are really cookin with gas now.  These are legendary roadies in my book.  The dog gives me a look, here we go again.

10)  Rooster-Alice In Chains Gets my grunge on.  I love everything about this song.  Probably one of the biggest contributors to hearing loss in my right ear.

9)   Six Days on the Road-Dave Duncan All those over-the-road truckers can’t be wrong, this is the best of all truckin’ songs.

8)   Tonight The Bottle Let Me Down-Merle Haggard   My favorite country singer and a whole lot of my favorite country music instrument, the steel guitar.  Damn I love this song

7)   Ticket To Ride-Beatles There are tons of Beatles songs to choose from and this isn’t my favorite, but it is my favorite on the road

6)   867-5309-Tommy Tutone This is my favorite 80s song.  And when I hear that guitar riff at the beginning...Jenny, Jenny who can I turn to?

2-5  These are huge, the fire is roaring and I have no concerns as to what is going on at this point.  I’ll be singing, playing drums, air guitar.  The dog has now tried to cover his ears due to the volume.

5)   Jamie’s Cryin-Van Halen Im not sure why, because there are tons of Van Halen songs to choose from, but for whatever reason, this one is my favorite while on the road

4)   North To Alaska-Johnny Horton   Ok, another one you may not expect at all but damn this is a fun song.  I physically can’t help whaling “big nuggets they’re finding” every time!

3)   Pink Houses-John Cougar Mellencamp    Im not a globalist. ‘Murica!!

2)   Sweet Child of Mine-Guns and Roses    This should be on everyones list. Road songs or any other.  Simply one of the best songs ever.  

Number 1!!!

So all the previous songs are great.  I love them all, and many, many more.  This is an elaborate list for me.  If you know me, you know I love lists, and don’t make them without deep thought.  But Ironically, the battle for the top spot isn’t even close.  I LOVE Sweet Child of Mine, and Pink Houses.  I might play them 2 or 3 times in a row, but the battle for number one isn’t much of a battle.  Not because these others arent great but because number one is so unbelievably spectacular in the car.  I can’t help singing to it, playing air guitar, drum solo in my car, volume literally turned up 3 or 4 times during the song, ears ringing and can’t even hear myself singing, and just when you don’t think it could be any better, it gets better!!!  There are times I may play this song 5, 6 times in a row if things are cookin.  I can barely keep the needle under 85 mph! The number one song for the road is:

1)  More Than A Feeling- Boston  I really built it up, and with good reason. Rock ballad, guitar anthem, unbelievable vocals, harmony soft, loud, louder, high, higher, drums...what else can I say?  This is simply the best road trip song ever!!

Ok, that’s it.  Maybe it was anti-climatic for you, but I got jazzed just listing the songs.  I may go take a drive just to hear the playlist!  I’d love to hear everyone else’s playlist that they take on every trip.  Maybe I’m missing some good road trip songs!  

I hope the dog never figures out how to jump out of the car while it’s moving.

[lowkeyclueless5137]

5. The 5th floor

Going to the next floor, it was a surprise for you to see the absolute mess this floor was in. Paint, toys, flour, was that blo- nevermind... More stinky paint! This floor is chaos in a bottle as dubbed by the others. And it's understandable. 5 people are living in those 2 flats. And it doesn't help that they act like they live in one big house.

On the right side, there is a lovely duo of tired spiritual parents.

Trey Clover and Cater Diamond are neighbours since start. First it was to not pile up on water or electricity bills, but they grew comfortable to the point they already practically moved in one of the 2 apartments before making it official. Cater is an art major and a vlogger. He does study journalism as a hobby, liking to investigate the 'wierd ghost phenomenons' going on in this city. Trey, on the other hand, is the one with a more realistic vision. He is a baker at his roots, which shows on his little cooking channel he runs as a hobby. His family lives near, having a local bakery they run. The bakery initially resided in London, but they decided to move in here for business purposes and to be close to their biggest son. Trey works at the bakery as a normal employee while Cater works at a cafe near the college campus. Both tho have their magnetic influence upon the other residents on this floor.

On the other end, the landlord has mixed feelings about these 3 residents.

3 boys sharing one flat. The terror duo of the block and one stressed out college student. What can go wrong? A lot of things if you ask anyone. Ace and Deuce were dorm roommates before they piled up their economies so they can buy a flat. Ace wants to start next year on IT college, while Deuce is aiming for police academy. Ace is a streamer and vlogger, while Deuce started on streaming out of a silly dare. Now they both are dubbed by the internet as 'the peak oblivious couple'. Their 3rd roommate came mostly since Trey was in a funny mood. Riddle came a bit later, but still a sucker for order. Deuce doesn't really condamn him as their flat is quite messy. Meanwhile Ace is taking upon his 'I own this place' rights. That usually ends up with the laundry on the hall so Deuce would rather not have his underwear out in the public. Currently, Ace works at a Cafe while Deuce is a part timer at a car fixing garage(?). No one knows what Riddle actually works, but do they even care if at least he makes the money? And it seems he does eran the most as he is able to spoil his little bunny pet... But don't tell the landlord about it... Maybe you can pet it if you keep quiet.

Author is just petting the bunny. It's fluffy so she'll stay here for a while... So go ahead and explore more...

[thatyorkshireguy-blog]

It’s About To Get Chile

My apologies for the graphic photo that i’ve chosen to lead with here, but it just about sums up the emotions of the last 12 months and what i’ve put my body and mind through just to achieve what was required! To keep on going! 

For my first blog post I’m going to have to hang my ‘Yorkshire plums’ out a little and bear my soul to you. So apologies, but it’s going to one of some length (giggedy) for me to be able to give you a full idea of my story and who this blog is aimed at. 

My name is Liam Grady and i’m a 35 year old marketing and communications specialist. 

I am a born and bred Yorkshire man.... Doncaster in South Yorkshire to be precise. 

Here’s the big one........ in less that 3 weeks time, I will be moving my entire life to Chile, South America. 

Why? But of course people....I move for love... for a beautiful chilean woman called, Fran Díaz Abeleida.

(Here’s the night we first met in London)

I met Fran in September 2017 when I was working down in London for just three days. Turns out Fran was on the last two days of her trip around Europe and making her way back home to Chile.  What were the chances we would be stopping just one street away from each other in England’s capital during that time? Crazy to think about! 

Well after two incredible evenings with this lady, I headed 170 miles via car back up north (The land of Yorkshire Puddings and more friendly folk) and Fran headed 7500 miles via a plane back to South America, not knowing if we were ever going to see each other again. 

The face that you actually see in the one above with Fran was taken at a time when my life may have been at my weakest, from a mental health point of view. During this stage of my life I wasn’t happy with who I was as a person and I’d hidden that fact through the bottle and party lifestyle for many years.  I always loved the people in my life and loved the ‘job’ that I did as a communicator......I was just missing something in my life. I didn’t respect myself - I will elude to what contributed to this downfall further down the story. 

As dramatic as this sounds, just a few days after meeting Fran, I could have killed myself or someone else as not for the first time id stupidly drink drove my vehicle. The ‘straw that broke the camels back’ as they say, was when I nearly crashed my car into my house mates car, and my own house. I felt so lost and I didn’t know what the problem was to be able to fix it. 

After some very harsh but ‘said with love’ words from a few friends, I decided to take an even more dramatic step and actually fight to survive....and this very much ended up being in the literal sense. I’d been training in martial arts over the years, on and off, very much off... more than on! 

However i found emotional and physical comfort whilst I was training at a place called Charles Martin Martial Arts for a charity fight in 2016. It helped me very much, and it was a team mate that turned to me and said I should fight properly this time.

I thought this person was crazy, as anyone will tell you who is in the fight game, that preparing....even for an amateur fight in K1, Muay Thai, Boxing or MMA is one of the hardest things you will do in your life. You have to change everything.

In November 2017 my life changed.....

For two months I started to train three times a week and i’d told my coaches of my issues and where I wanted to be and how much I wanted to change. I knew this was going to be difficult but I had no choice. I needed this. 

At the same time I’d been talking to Fran over text and voice calls for a few weeks but i’d started to feel like it could be a bad focus of my attention or that there maybe no point in this communication, because how could we ever see each other. 

I remember ‘THE PHONE CALL’ with Fran. I told her that I was concerned nothing would happen, or how could it even happen for a while given the circumstances.  It was Fran’s turn to motivate and inspire me, as she was absolutely gutted that I didn’t think ‘the relationship’ would go anywhere and she proceeded to at first be very upset... but then the next 15 mins turned into one of the most beautiful talks i’d ever had. 

I couldn’t believe this beautiful South American was willing to take a risk on me and at least try to make something work between us. 

At this moment I stopped being a ‘wimp’ (not the best word but one I described myself as at that point) and I really started to fight.

Fran then took a huge step and booked a flight to see me in February for a two week break. I couldn’t believe it. But I still didn’t feel like I was anywhere near good enough or right for this woman. I also needed to dedicate my energy to this person as she lived so far away and to stop me from being tempted with other life distractions that made me hate myself in the first place.

So the training went from 3 days to training between 5-8 times a week. I was dedicated and so focussed and proceeded to change much in my life. My energy levels towards work improved and my whole outlook and positivity started to raise to places id never even been. I was actually starting to like to the person I was turning into. 

February 2018 was approaching fast and both myself and Fran were very anxious, scared and excited about seeing each other. Although we had spoken pretty much every single day since we met each other, we hadn’t seen each other for over 6 months and we had only met each other twice in person!  Yet again, this seems a little crazy doesn’t it. 

That day came when Fran took another 7000 mile trip. I will never ever forget she arrived on that train and looked at me. Our eyes both welled up and I knew at that moment I was already dreading the point of her leaving. We had the most incredible two weeks together. 

Doncaster isn’t the most beautiful of locations in the U.K (according to most) but during Fran’s trip we had some of the worst snowfall in recent times and it added something so magical to the two weeks. 

Awesome hey? 

Fran left during the first week in March and although devastated I just knew I wanted to be with her so badly but I also.... I knew realistically I might not be able to see her for some months to allow me to save up enough money to make the trip happen. 

April 2018 had arrived and so had my first fight. Everything I had worked hard for was here...my moment ... everything was set up beautifully. My opponent was over 15 years younger and was coming fresh from a victory.  What happened next I wasn’t expecting....

During that 1st round of my first fight I was absolutely rubbish and my opponent battered my for the first 2 minutes. I wondered what the hell I’d done. But one thing in life I had discovered is that I always had a big heart and it would take a lot for me to actually give up.  I might not have had the skills my opponent possessed but my mind and heart had become that of a warrior. 

Although physically shattered just after the first round, I came out the second like a totally different guy. I ended up winning that second round landing a good sweep and a good right hand which had my opponent rocked back. It was however too little too late and over the fight my opponent won a well deserved decision. That first fight taught me so much. 

After the fight was over I felt an emptiness inside and over the course of the next few weeks I could feel myself slipping back into my weak points because I didn’t have training or my beautiful Chilean with me.  It wasn’t long before I quickly realised that I needed to be with Fran ASAP!...but in her country and not in mine. I needed a change of everything. I just had no money to get there. 

My job that I was in at the time only paid me enough to cover my bills, just get by each month and it didn’t give me the mental or physical freedom to use my skill set to its full potential. 

In order to get me to Fran I know I needed to do two things, change something with my work life and go back to training straight away with the view to fight again. 

During June and July I did everything I could to improve my life. Work hard during the day in my normal office role (Communications Director), train hard for two hours every day straight after work and then any spare time I had would be dedicated to helping others with their social media/marketing - FOR FREE!!!! I wanted to pay my time forward with the hope that deep down something would come back to me. 

This is exactly what happen...

At the start of July, i’d produced a document on social media for one of the business members at a co-working studio called ‘Helm’. From that one document caused a ripple of actions. 

I’d received a call from the founder of Helm, a good friend and contact, Liam Swift. He asked whether i’d like to do a presentation on social media at the next ‘Doncaster Digital’ event, which takes place at the Helm studio every month. 

I agreed and put together a presentation that was true to myself and something that could help many businesses understand more about their social media channels. This event turned out to be one of the best attended Doncaster Digital events with over 40 different businesses attending my talk. 

(Here’s me giving the talk on that night at the studio and one quite happy straight after - I am the one jumping higher than the rest as you can see!) 

So I was told it went very well indeed. 

Actually....my phone would not stop with texts and calls of support that night. At around 11.00pm, Liam Swift dropped me a text message to say that there was a couple of people in the room who were watching very closely and that I may get a text in the morning from a business regarding help they required. 

The following morning I received a text message from the founder of football coaching brand, Mini Kicks. He wanted to meet me to discuss a potential opportunity about working with them and them helping me on my mission to get to Chile. This had me very intrigued.

I received that text message at 9.30am and by 12.00pm I was having lunch with the Mini Kicks founder. 

By 12.45pm I had received a job offer that again was a turning point in my life and by 2.30pm ....i’d handed in my notice and effectively quit my other job that day.

The offer at that time was just too good to refuse. It was only a short term solution but it allowed me to achieve what I needed to straight away and give me the freedom to build up a personal brand before I left for Chile. 

It is the first time, hand on heart that I have ever......ever shed tears of pure joy and emotion.  I phoned up Fran, burst out crying and just said....”I can come to Chile”. I just couldn’t believe this opportunity had happened! 

If truth be told I wanted to just fly there and then but I couldn’t leave the country until I had done a few things. The first was fight again and that came last month in October, and the second was to be a best man at one of my closest friends weddings. This happened last weekend. 

My life was finally coming together but I was still having to manage money and effectively start my own business and go solo again. 

Fran even came to see me again in September for a few days which although she became very unwell during her time here - literally as she landed, it was a chance to show her what a person I could be in times of illness. It was just great to be with her! 

How much can one person try and achieve in just a short space of time?

Ok, so now it was fight time once again! I’d trained so hard for this next fight, physically and mentally took me to places I hadn’t been, but due to a bad injury suffered in August I wasn’t able to do any sparring. Which was bad news for me because in October I fought an absolute beast of a guy.  I also had to come down to 70kg which I was 77kg when I started this journey the November before.  

Again fight day came, and with my closest friends and family there to watch, it once again seemed that everything was set up to go out with a bang and leave as a hero.  

We were ready...and I had unfinished business. 

From the first bell I wanted to show that i’d improved...and I had. I was calmer, better on my fight...just better all round. However i’d been matched up once again with a very powerful and skilled guy.  He caught me with an uppercut that badly broke my nose and for 10 seconds he knocked the sh*t out of me....and he went for the KO.  On shakey legs, I managed to quickly back off and then out of nowhere I landed a right of my own which then rocked my opponent. The commentators were going mad.  Another moment i’ll not forget.   

In fairness my opponent took the first round just on the better shots landed but we both exchanged some great punches and kicks which made it a great fight.

Then came a defining moment which I believe my friend and one of my corner men, James Hartley, put better on Facebook - which i’ll share with you now (Again another read, but it’s hard for yourself to put into emotions).

James’s (gent in the lovely shirt haha) word’s really capture what I went through on this journey of self discovery, on a journey of doing what I had to do to be a better person not just for Fran, but mostly for myself. I’ve had a crazy 12-18 months! 

If I didn’t love myself, how could I ever allow myself to fully love someone else or allow them to fully love me. 

To just bring it back to why I was in the mental state I was at the start of this story.....

Over 8 years ago, I ended up losing my best friend in a car crash and my dad through cancer, within 6 months of each other and all I did was pack all that pain up and pretend like it didn’t matter. Hiding tough times through drink and a party lifestyle, which was absolutely bullshit and I allowed that to start destroying myself from the inside out.  Up until I met Fran and my love for martial arts, I just never knew how to love properly....and thanks to both of those things, I now can.  I am so excited about life and in less than three weeks I will be flying to Santiago, Chile, to be with my lady.  

My mission is to make her happy, save lots of street dogs and help other people, whether that be in business or just in life. 

I wanted to share this story because it gives you an idea of if you truly want something, if you’re truly willing to improve yourself and get to where you need to be in life, it becomes fight or flight and you have to fight for what you want.....you have to!  And I did and will continue to do so.  Don’t hide grief and pain, and do lean on people for support, they give you the strength when you least expect it. 

Although this is quite a personal post, I want the people and brands that I will be working with moving forward to know the type of person that they are working with and I truly hope it helps people discover that they can achieve anything they want. 

Oh, I ticked of the best man duties as well....that was last weekend and it was one of the best days of my life, and a memory that will stay with me forever. 

So cheers to you U.K. Leaving my country, my life and especially my friends will be the hardest thing i have ever had to do, maybe even harder than my fight journey. But it is easiest the most exciting thing I’ve ever done.

Thank you so much to my friends and family who have supported me along the way.  A huge thank you to the people at Helm and at Mini Kicks.

One of the biggest thank you’s has to go to my coaches and team mates at Charles Martin Martial Arts, I don’t think they truly realise what an impact they have had on my life and how much it truly as changed.

Of course the biggest one goes to my girlfriend, my partner and the reason I am moving country...... Fran. You inspire me to be better for both you and for myself. I can’t wait to see you in three weeks time. 

And Chile....I am coming for you! 

Thank you for taking the time to read this. I know it was long (giggedy) but I am grateful for your time. 

Forever humble...

Liam Grady

That Yorkshire Guy. 

Please share this with anyone who might find this helpful and please follow me on Facebook and Instagram - just follow ‘THAT YORKSHIRE GUY’  - I will be sharing my entire journey via Instagram and I am hoping to collaborate with some amazing brands on this journey. Please get in touch on my IG page or lgrady83@gmail.com. I will get onto this more on my next post. 

[inky-thoughts]

How to Organize a Zine 101 #6

I think I talked a lot about planning out your whole zine that we finally can go on with the next step:

Phase 2: Applications

A zine wouldn’t be a zine (okay, yes it would because there are plenty of zines where only one artist contributes to it but that’s not why you’re here) if it wasn’t for the contributors of a zine. The application process is probably the busiest part of making a zine, and it’s right at the start so you basically are shoved into the cold water immediately without much of a pep talk.

Ideally, if you start open applications, you

have gathered some mods so you don’t need to go through this whole ordeal alone

created a web presence (tumblr, twitter, etc.) to spread the word and have people easily gather all info they need to apply (plus some kind of corporate design that makes everything look like a unit)

thought about what is a reasonable number of contributors for you to handle and what type of contributions you want to allow (writing, illustrations, comics, cosplay shoots, ...)

thought about your zine format (printed/digital, size, wordcounts, etc.)

have a budget + printing services (if you have anything printed)

have a solid, manageable schedule figured out (note it probably will change a little bit along the way but ideally really not much or not at all)

Some pointers of how you can figure these parts out are on previous parts of this series, so maybe read up on those if you have any questions. Others will come now as they are something that you kind of figure out at this stage or are simply a budget/taste or goal-oriented thing.

During this phase, you need to basically cover the following steps:

launch all your social media/web presence if you haven’t yet

write down exactly what your zine is about, what format you’ll use and any other specs

have a FAQ

create application forms or regulations on how to apply

gather contributors

weed out those applicants you don’t want on your zine

constantly answering questions people send you (even though you probably stated so in the FAQ)

confirm participation, backups, and declined applicants

The number of contributors

I think the number of contributors is something you kind of have an idea of in the beginning but it will flesh out more as soon as other things get settled and can highly depend on what kind of works contributors create.

Probably the most time-intense thing for mods to handle are fic-writers, which is why there are (sadly) so few zines that allow many or even any writers at all. Writers usually get the most pages per person, need a beta-reader, need their fics to be formatted properly in the zine file to make them look like a unit, and, if you allow collaborations with artists, may have illustrations that also need to be included to the fic. Artists are much more autonome as they just deliver their final file and you just insert it. While it sounds great at first because you as a mod seem to not have that much of a workload to do, I must also mention the fact that I found it harder to work with artists than with writers according to their reliability.

Zine culture somehow established that there are more zines featuring more artists than writers, thus writers per say don’t have many zines they can work on, leading to a cleaner schedule than especially popular and high-quality artists tend to have. Depending on how professionally artists organise themselves, I had to run after quite a few artists for every deadline despite sending reminders via e-mail and our discord channel. The time and effort you save in the planned production you will most likely need to invest at a later point, so it’s not exactly that much of a difference as long as you have mods who work in the respective media themselves.

Generally speaking, having 1 mod per 10-15 contributors is probably a good rule of thumb, but yet again, there are exceptions, and if you split the general fields of modding between your mods, you probably could take on more contributors as you probably don’t need to care about your social media accounts in addition, and everyone works with contributors they can actually relate to due to the shared expertise.

Also, don’t forget that you also need to budget your whole zine, and if you happen to make a printed zine, this also means you should compensate the contributors with a free copy. Think about how many contributors you can afford if you don’t make any sales and how likely it is to get a good (printed) zine out of that number. Having an affordable number also means that you need to think about how many pages your zine should have. Usually, the binding is more of a cost factor than the number of pages, though it also definitely makes a difference if you have 40 or 60 pages (or 100). Be aware of that, too.

With certain themes also comes a specific number of contributors. I think my best example is the HQ Manager Zine I worked on as a contributor. Its theme was ‘Four Seasons,’ featuring the nine confirmed Haikyuu!! Managers, with the specific rule that per manager, in all four seasons was at least one art and one written piece included. Thus we were 36 contributors with a minimum of 9 writers and 9 artists (we ended up with 27 artists I believe.) With those zines, it is crucial to have a highly functional backup system because there always are a few who just drop out.

What kind of contributors do you want to have?

This pretty much goes along with what I mentioned above but also ... not.

There are zines that are about specific topics and where especially certain groups of creators are encouraged to contribute to give them a voice. Usually it’s about women/girls, trans and nonbinary people, LGBTAQ+ people, PoC, disabled, ... or any combination of the above and how those groups experience the fandom, characters, or topics featured in the zine. If you want to create a zine where you especially represent a certain group, make sure to explicitly say so in your Call for Submission posts, and also define it (for example want your contributors to be girls and women, specify if you also allow feminine-presenting nonbinary people as they usually have a similar experience as women if that’s what you’re aiming for), so that possible applicants know if they should even bother to check out your application form.

If you want to cover adult/NSFW themes in your zine, make sure you have an 18+ policy simply to not accidentally become a criminal.

If you have any more specifics because they are crucial to your content, incorporate them as early as possible so you don’t get somebody’s hopes up for nothing. It also helps you as a mod to check certain criteria when you look through your applicants. (And no, I don’t mean ‘must be actually good at art’ or something like that.)

Applications or Invite Only?

Above criteria don’t only apply to open-for-application zines, as Invite Only or a mixture of both need to handle their contributor numbers as well. However, the process of gathering contributors is different.

Invite Only zines have several pros:

you don’t need to justify why X got hired and not Y

you can assure a certain level of quality simply because you know what the contributors are capable of

you can better predict what kind of feel the zine will have

as they usually feature popular contributors, they are likely to sell quite well

you don’t need to dig through tons and tons of applications and can save some time

less time pressure as there are not over hundred people waiting to *finally* get their e-mail

However, there of course are some cons as well:

getting popular /contributors you admire interested in your zine might be difficult if you yourself aren’t very well-known/don’t know the contributors personally

your invited contributors might just say no, leaving you with fewer contributors than intended

the zine might come off as elitist

it’s more difficult to get people invested into your zine from the start as the first public phase (applications) is also hidden away behind closed doors and basically just pop out of the closet several months later with a finished zine up for preorders

I personally don’t really have much experience with Invite Only zines, but generally it feels more like a group project than “one is the manager and everyone else are just the employees” as it tends to be more with open-for-application zines. This can be both, positive and negative, this is something you need to figure out for yourself.

Pros of Public Application:

you don’t really need to worry about not getting enough contributors

you might discover many gems you didn’t know about at first at all because they navigate on different parts of the fandom

you have a big variety of applicants to choose from and find a tone of your zine later on if you’re unsure about it at first

no-one really feels left out because they could just apply

people can get pumped up about your zine early on and possibly save up for it

Cons entail:

there is usually quantity over quality and it takes some time to get to the Good Stuff™

it is a time-consuming process with usually a lot of time pressure because everyone just wants to know who’s in and who’s not

people might get dissappointed because they didn’t get in ‘despite being so much better than XY’

especially artists tend to juggle several zines at once and might not have the time and headspace for your project that you wish they had

you don’t quite know if it will attract more popular contributors

Public Appliations are currently the most common form of gathering contributors methinks, but as I mentioned, both have their pros and cons, and it’s something you need to figure out yourself and what fits your zine best. PA zines have a more democratic feel when it comes to who’s on it as basically everyone could have a chance, though that probably isn’t the case when you move away from the application phase. PA zines tend to be more rigit in their original purpose compared to IO zines.

What also is a thing that zines do is a combination of both. That way, you can target specific contributors that probably would get in a larger crowd, and get public applications too. The more popular contributors also might encourage their fans to apply simply by being named as an already set contributor because, really, who wouldn’t love to work on the same project as their idol (and maybe get senpai notice them)? The better and more popular the already set contributors are, the more quality contributors they might draw in. Stressing ‘might’ here because you can’t always be 100% sure.

How do you want to host applications?

Currently, most zines I have seen use Google Surveys to create application forms as it is pretty easy and intuitive to work with and lets you export all your answers into spreadsheets (plus it’s a cloud device so all of your mods can have access to it.) I personally can only recommend it. I don’t know if there are similar online services as I know that not everyone likes using Google, so if you have any which are similar, please let me know!

Another option is letting people apply via e-mail, though I would advise you to only do that if you know you’ll have very limited applicant numbers or have to deal with just the Invite Only traffic, otherwise it’s probably going to get messy as however small an nieche the fandom is, there will always be plenty to apply to, simply because they hope to finally be on a zine.

I also would suggest to have seperate forms for the different positions you offer (e.g. zine artist, bonus artist, writer, ...), that way you can already split up who’s covering which applications and you’ll be done faster.

I think the next few installments will deal with how to build up a functional application form, what to cover in your FAQ and the important specs on your Call for Submission, but that’s it for now!

Thank you for reading, I hope this is somewhat helpful.

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Masterpost

[maybeyoumissthisf-kingpost]

The Art of Discount (Part 1): Consumer Discount

Businesses often spend a lot of money to build programs to attract customers, typically using discounts. Because discounts - including all forms of discounts on sales - are one of the most obvious methods of creating value for customers to lead them to a decision to buy a product. However, not the more the discount, the more effective it is. With a consumer discount program , it's important to know where your audience is in their consumer journey. Thinking of a sales support program is not difficult, but how to make it effective is an artistic sky.

Discount and its benefits

Discount programs are generally used for three main goals: (1) Clearing inventory, (2) Attracting new buyers, and (3) Realizing revenue targets during off-season sales.

Why can discounting help businesses achieve these goals? Because it offers the following benefits:

Attract new customers effectively without launching a massive marketing campaign;

Encourage shoppers to make immediate purchasing decisions – especially effective when promotions are limited in time;

Push past period inventory or products nearing expiration date;

The product is highly likely to be promoted by the point of sale at no cost;

Pull inactive/inactive consumers to buy again.

The problem of discounting

Sales discounts have long been used to incentivize purchases and create a competitive advantage over other brand products at the point of sale. While discounting isn't a new tool, it always works – when marketers use it right.

However, an age-old problem with marketers is that they often apply discounts to every audience without considering what stage each audience is at in the buying journey.

Reference : Ladder model to analyze market share loss in the article What is the market? What is Marketing? Market share method to see which stage in the buying journey is the biggest problem causing you to lose market share.

So the solution is that we have to balance the timing - frequency of making discounts and determining the specific audience that your program is aimed at.

Build a discount program for consumers

Discounts should not be applied to everyone. I can't say which type of discount is best for your business. But I can suggest you how to implement those programs effectively.

There are countless ways to vary the discount program for consumers. But it has to be done wisely. At the same time, any discount strategy must be based on business goals and suitable for each buyer.

Plan before you make a discount

Before making product price cuts to achieve revenue goals, you need to make a detailed plan for the program. This is necessary to make sure that subsequent orders are still profitable. Accordingly, the issues you need to pay attention to are:

Know current gross margin, markup, breakeven point;

Calculate the best discount price to ensure profit;

Have an action plan to incentivize new buyers and boost purchase incentives for hesitant customers;

Survey programs and prices of competitors regularly;

Consider other selling options without cutting prices (more on that later);

Determining the time to apply the new sales price;

Monitor weekly, monthly, or yearly reporting metrics as sales decline.

How to set a revenue target when doing a discount program?

When adjusting the selling price of goods/services, it is important to know how this change will affect your gross margin and sales target. A successful sales program – that is, acquiring customers, while keeping profits – needs to be implemented with careful and careful calculation of gross margin, markup and breakeven point.

How to balance the above factors is not easy. Business Victoria, a business portal for the Victorian government (Australia) has released a spreadsheet that makes it easier for businesses to set revenue targets when making sales discounts.

HOLY RECIPE

If the price drops…And gross profit margin (%) is…

0%15%20%25%30%35%40%

5% 50.0%33.3%25%20%16.7%14.3%

6%150%66.7%42.9%31.6%25%20.7%17.6%

8%400%114.3 %66.7%47.1%36.4%29.6%25%

ten% 200%100%66.7%50%40%33.3%

twelfth% 400%150%92.3%66.7%52.2%42.9%

15%  300%150%100%75%60%

For example, with a gross profit margin of 20%, you reduce the price of a product by 10%, then the target sales need to increase by 100% to ensure a profit.

Suggest a discount program for consumers1. Discount for new customers

Sometimes when we need to expand product lines, enter new segments, or simply boost sales, we have to find a way to attract new customers. This work often consumes a lot of resources to "lead" this object to a purchase decision.

Therefore, a discount program to close the target at the Purchase stage needs to be properly implemented. When building a program for new customers, it's important to:

– Define target specific customer segments : We know we need to find new customers, but do not know who the new customers are. What's more harmful than a program targeting the wrong audience? What could be more wasteful and less effective than a program aimed at too broad a group?

– Personalize the program message: Once the target area is located, the next thing is to make sure that the target group realizes this offer is only for them, is their own EXCLUSIVE. This will motivate them to get closer to the buying stage. But it is NOT. You must also:

- Tell them why you discount: If you want customers to accept your deals, give them a reason. As Robert Cialdini writes in his book Influence: The Psychology Of Persuasion:

People simply want a reason for what they do. (People simply like to have reasons for what they do)

Remember that you only need to give them a REASON to lower the price, it doesn't even need to be convincing. This tactic works even if you streamline your discount as simply as “Teng teng… you’re new”, “Congrats on being one of our first 10 guests” (although maybe you were the 50th or… 500th buyer).

2. Incentives for loyal customers

If you already have a loyal customer base – which is best if you have or build it now – why not build a program to reward them? For example, give customers a coupon for their next purchase to thank them for supporting your product.

As reported by LoyaltyOne , up to 76% of customers want personalized offers based on their purchase history. Thus, a program to accumulate points to redeem gifts will be extremely effective to retain existing customers.

3. Holiday discounts

On major shopping holidays, such as Black Friday , is when consumers are willing to spend the most. This is when trade marketing programs work because it drives shopper purchase decisions immediately.

4. Discount for pre-orders when launching new products

When launching a new product, most of us want as many buyers as possible. Is it true? Pre-order discounts for limited quantities will quickly speed up a shopper's decision-making process.

However, it is also important to be careful because a pre-launch discount can reduce the value of the product in the mind of the customer. Therefore, do not reduce too much on the first day of product launch. In addition, showing the discount as a percentage or a specific amount must also be considered. For example, 20% discount doesn't sound as attractive as discount 1,OOO,OOOd right? Although the reduction amount of both is the same.

5. Sold in packs/sold in combos

Bundle/combo selling is a great cross-selling technique that encourages shoppers to buy multiple products to get a better price than buying each item individually. This form is especially effective when businesses "catch the trend" at the right time. Remember the trend of making Dalgona coffee that caused a fever in 2020? Large coffee brands such as Trung Nguyen and Nescafe have immediately launched coffee combos sold with milk to serve the needs of users.

6. Discount when buying in bulk

Why not offer a better price when customers buy a lot of your products? If you are an office worker who is addicted to milk tea, you are probably familiar with programs such as "Buy 3 cups, get 1 cup free", "Buy 4 cups, get 2 cups", etc. What are the results? That is, you will "inviting" the whole office to order enough, and the milk tea shop will not only receive orders of greater value, but also be "promoted" for free and recruit more new customers.

Not only helps increase the size and value of the buyer's order, quantity discount is also an effective way to move stock when the seller needs to clear the inventory of a certain item.

7. Discounts for suspended carts

You may have heard about this offer already, but it's such a great retargeting technique for online channels that I just can't pass up. According to Baymard , up to 70% of shopping carts are abandoned because of additional costs in the order. Thus, a discount program for shoppers who are hanging orders will help you regain a large number of orders that seem to have been lost.

This form has a major drawback. That is, if you continuously offer discounts on suspended orders, the next time the shopper will create a shopping cart and then exit, then wait until a promotional offer to buy at a cheap price. Therefore, you should only apply this program once per customer, or limit the duration of the program.

8. Discount when referring acquaintances

You certainly understand the importance of word of mouth marketing. Nothing can be more reliable than a recommendation from an acquaintance. According to ReferralCandy , up to 83% of satisfied customers are willing to recommend to their acquaintances, but in fact… only 29% actually do this.

Therefore, a discount program when introducing new people will encourage your customers to be more "active" in promoting your products to everyone around.

But discounting doesn't always work

Many people often look to discounts as the solution to all business problems, without understanding what the customer's problem is. Therefore, it is not surprising that people massively do promotions but in the end do not see any noticeable effect. Then we put in the report the reasons abc xyz that explains why the program doesn't work.

Discount blindly will kill your business. The more you abuse the discount, the more you lower the value of your product in the customer's mind. Don't compromise with customers. Find out the problem, then give them real solutions.

If discounts don't help boost sales, remember that there are always alternatives, not always a price cut. Here are some suggested programs other than discounts:

Service improvement

If you do not want to reduce the price of the product, the service improvement that comes with the purchase is also an effective way to attract buyers, such as:

Free installation

Free shipping

Free gift wrapping

Enhanced after-sales (warranty, maintenance, ...)

The most typical example is thegioididong.com, an extremely successful mobile device retail chain of MWG. By upgrading customer service to a new level, Mobile World makes buyers feel like they are no different from "God" right from the moment they send the car. As a result, they have risen to become the mobile device retail chain with the largest market share in Vietnam thanks to improved service, even though the selling price is always higher than other places.

However, service improvement needs to be harmonized before, during and after sales to achieve the best effect. Otherwise, this will be a double-edged sword if the brand previously created too much trust for buyers but was weak in after-sales service, possibly even receiving a series of complaints from consumers, affecting to brand reputation and reduce the ability of customers to repurchase the product/refer to acquaintances of customers who have purchased the product.

Packaging development

Have you ever thought that your current product packaging is gradually becoming boring to consumers? Why not think about "changing clothes" for products to look more eye-catching on special occasions?

Example : In the midst of the 2017 Sea Games football fever, Coca-Cola "caught the trend" very well to cheer the home team by wearing player shirts for three product lines of Coca, Sprite, Fanta at Circle K.

Comes with a gift

The word “free” always has a strong appeal, so GWP (free gift with purchase) will be another option to effectively replace discount. The "cheapest" items to give are usually cloth bags, stainless steel straws, glass vases, porcelain cups, etc., but make customers extremely excited.

Even free gifts sometimes not only aim to catch the shopper's attention but also support other marketing purposes.

Example : Trung Nguyen gave a sample of Legend Classic coffee in a bag of G7 3in1 coffee in the US. It can be seen that besides building promotion for the G7 series, they also intentionally sampled for their Legend premium coffee line and helped buyers identify genuine Trung Nguyen products among the parallel sea of ​​goods on the market.

Create an event

If you run a cafe-restaurant business, you definitely want to avoid discount programs. Especially when it's a premium brand. Think of a live music session, contest, social activity, etc. on a certain day of the week or month. Because entertainment is always an essential human need, it not only helps attract people, but also makes them want to linger longer, order a few more dishes or drinks to sip and enjoy.

Donate to charity/organization for the environment

Momo : For every purchase of movie tickets you buy at any CGV, Galaxy Cinema, BHD, Lotte Cinema, Cinestar and MegaGS cinemas and pay with MoMo, you have donated 1,000 VND for the program "Red lucky money". smile for 100 children”.

Ecosia : This search site uses advertising revenue to plant trees, on average every 45 searches will convert to a planted tree.

Instead of discount, these two brands convince customers to use this money to donate to charity or for the environment. Of course, the persuasiveness of this program is quite high and is often warmly received by consumers. Not only avoiding product discounts, but also building an effective CSR program to the community and increasing brand trust.

Conclude

Discounts have always been a story about sensible spending. If you use them properly – in the right place, with the right person (object), at the right time – then you will definitely get positive results. Again: Never offer a discount to everyone! And don't abuse the discount, because we always have other effective replacement programs that don't have to cut the price of the product.

Although brands are always encouraged to make programs for consumers, retailers are often not too excited about these programs of the brand. Why? Because it is a battle for market share between brands, while the point of sale does not receive much benefit from this competition. Suppose the sales point of sale for the category is 100 VND, in which brand A accounts for 40 VND, brand B accounts for 60 VND. When brand A does promotion, their revenue increases to 70 dong, and brand B doesn't do it, so it's only 30 dong. In general, the total revenue of the point of sale is still 100 VND.

Now do you understand why I said retailers aren't usually excited about brand consumer programs? Competition at the point of sale is another story that you need to pay special attention to, which is why I continue with Part 2: Discounts for distributors.

All credit goes to trantuansang.com.

[emilywoodsunit34]

EVALUATION

The requirements of the brief were to understand how image manipulation techniques are used in the work of others, be able to digitise source materials, be able to originate work using image manipulation hardware and software and be able to present own design outcomes. There was also to understand the potential of digital media in contemporary art and design practice, be able to select materials for digital experimentation, be able to produce work using digital art and design techniques.

We had to either redesign a book cover or turn a movie into a book cover. I Decided to do The Purge. We had to use some photography in our work however it was a creative piece and we had to manipulate the work to make it indistinguishable as a photograph in the end. Task 1 was to create a Tumblr and start researching. We began with Erik Johansson and had to outline his process and how he created his work. We then had to research 2 more artists of our choice and I chose Luisa Azevedo and Chema Madoz because I thought their work was very interesting and intricate. Next, we had to find multiple examples of different and intriguing digital illustration that have used photography in their work.  I found 3 I loved and explained why I chose them on my Tumblr. One of the last things was to experiment with photoshop techniques and I looked on Youtube for this and found examples on how to create fire and text on photoshop and also turn everything cartoon. Lastly, we had to create a small 200 word paragraph and explain how photoshop can help in the creation of art.

Task 2 of the brief was to show evidence and ideas generation which I did in a small sketch book and took photos with my phone and uploaded them onto my Tumblr. I then had to write a proposal with 400 words to explain what I was going to do and why. I personally didn't do a final small sketch with an outcome because to be completely honest I didn't know what I was going to do until it was done. I then finally did a diary entry that was updating what I was going so far and what I wanted to continue doing and what was working.

Task 3 was then just basically creating my final piece and taking screenshots of what I had achieved so far along with sending my final piece for marking. Lastly, we had to create a final diary entry however I am going to include this in my evaluation as I am going to explain how and why I did it.

The creative process I followed was just one big learning curve on how to create things. I wanted to experiment as much as possible so I did a lot of techniques and if they worked with my image I added them in. To create some of my ideas I decided to do a small mind map inside my sketch book and put different ideas on their along with potential options for other book covers. I took inspiration from having a quick look at the movie posters and also from older book covers as I wanted to keep it very simple and effective. The only planning I only really took was creating some mind maps before hand and viewing youtube videos to learn how to create new photoshop techniques. Some new techniques I learnt were how to create fire from nothing and also how to create something a cartoon.

Personally I didn't have a specific meaning for my photoshop final piece I just wanted to use this opportunity for myself to learn new techniques and create something I created myself. To create it I started with a photoshoot of the person of choice including the masks. I didn't do a huge photoshoot as I knew the basic style I wanted to shoot. Once this was done I went to photoshop and opened up my final image. once this was done I edited the shadows and highlights to bring the image out a lot more including the contrast so the image wasn't so flat. I started with just this to begin with as I wasn't too sure what I was going to create. It was at this point I chose I wanted to make it more of a cartoon; I then went onto youtube to learn how to create it. Firstly I opened my image onto photoshop and then copied it onto a new layer then made it invisible by clicking the eye next to it. Next, I went onto the background layer and converted it to a smart object by right clicking and then clicked the selected option, this was so any affect can be separated easily. I then went onto ‘filter’, ‘filter gallery’ and then onto ‘artistic’ and finally ‘poster edges’. I set the edge thickness to 0, the edge intensity to 4 and posterisation to 1. After that I went onto the filter option next to the effect and changed the opacity to 75%, then I went back onto filter gallery and then chose the ‘cutout’ filter. I made the number of levels 6, the edge simplicity 4 and then edge fidelity 2. After applying the effect I double clicked on the same icon and made it 75% again. For another time I went back onto filter and chose pixelate, colour halftone, made the maximum radius 4, and made all 4 channels 45. This created a dotted effect however once again I double clicked and made the opacity 75% but changed the blend mode from ‘normal’ to ‘soft light’. Once this was all done I made the first layer visible again by pressing the eye icon next to the image and chose ‘glowing edges’ from the ‘stylise’ folder. I made the edge width 1, edge brightness 3 and then smoothness 15. For the last time I went to filter gallery, sketch, and then torn edges with the image balance 4, smoothness 15 and the contrast 12. Above all of this there is a drop down arrow and I then changed this to ‘overlay’ which overlaid the images together and merged them nicely and changed the opacity to 40%.

Overall I am very happy with how the editing came out. To create the fire I first got opened a new page in photoshop and made the background black. Using the pen tool I made a random shape using 4 point creating a very simple flame like shape. Once this was done I went onto ‘filter’, ‘render’ and then ‘flame’. I then chose the first option ‘one flame along path’ and then it made a flame. I then copied it onto my actual image and used control + J to make copies and dot them around the page also making new flames so it wasn't too consistent.

For the text I couldn't manage to find any text or any way to create the same effect from scratch on photoshop and therefore I used the pen tool to cut out the actual Purge text and copied it onto the cover. 

I am personally very satisfied with my final piece because although I think it could look a lot more professional I am happy that I learnt how to do many new things and think for the first time doing them they turned out really well. My aim was to teach myself new things and although I had less time to do this assignment than others I think I learnt the most in this one. My strength was learning and teaching myself new things and my weakness was that it was my first time doing a lot of these things on photoshop and therefore they may look a little bit amateurish. If I was to do this project again I would maybe plan it out a bit more better and give everything a certain time so I can get certain bits done in certain times instead of winging it.