#theres a lot of sans sorry

[barnabybrainrot]

—-

[cherry-shipping]

ALSO. sorry for being lame but i think its fun to think about watching all these stupid romantic kissy scenes with my f/os 😀👍

[skeletalheartattack]

wat is your favorite video game skeleton!!!!!!!!!!!

hmmm that's a tough one really! the two skeletons that pop in my head right off the bat are: Manny Calavera and the Castlevania 64 Motorcycle Skeletons.

[inamagicalhallucination]

headcanon atsushi’s ability the tiger does not know what to do when it likes someone

like in general atsushi is bad with knowing what to do with the ppl he likes and showing affection -- like he tries to mimic others but he himself is still working on something that feels natural if that makes sense

but the tiger

the tiger is far worse becuz the only positive thing it can associate with positive emotions is food so every time it gets closer to the full moon the tiger starts whispering in the back of his mind that he should eat dazai and kunikida

then kyouka and junichiro

and ranpo and yosano and fukuzawa and kenji and naomi and haruno

at first atsushi panics (naturally) worries he’s a cannibal, thinks the tiger hates the agency, panics more, especially after dead apple when he and the tiger gained an understanding of each other and he realized that the tiger was protecting him so he’s like why r u trying to kill the agency members

but gradually he realizes that actually the tiger just doesn’t know how to deal with positive emotions and yeah

anyway:

atsushi: dazai-san is so nice to me :)

the tiger: yeah :)

the tiger: we should eat him

atsushi: NO????

//

kunikida, patting atsushi’s head: good job on ur report atsushi

the tiger: use his arm against him and eat him

kunikida: atsushi u look weird are u feeling unwell

atsushi: hahaha dont worry about no weird thoughts here hahahaha

//

atsushi, literally just working:

the tiger: the small candy one eats a lot of sugar. he would taste sweet. Eat him.

atsushi: NO??????????????

ranpo, looking up: i’ve actually always wondered what i would taste like-

//

and so on

is this incredibly dumb? yes but is it also funny, yes

atsushi realizes he likes akutagawa because at some point when he spots him the tiger immediately starts wondering what he’d taste like

atsushi, sees akutagawa: oh there’s that basta-

the tiger: i bet he’d taste really nice

atsushi:

atsushi: oh 

atsushi: oh no

//

akutagawa: how did you figure out you liked me?

atsushi: i couldn’t stop thinking about what you’d taste like

akutagawa, blushing: oh-

atsushi: yeah it was insane how much the tiger wanted to kill and eat u

akutagawa, slightly confused and horrified: oh-

//

eventually as atsushi learns to deal with his feelings so does the tiger but unfortunately it’s still an animal so its more like

atsushi: dazai’s so nice :)

the tiger: yeah :)

the tiger: lets hunt a deer for him 

atsushi: no??????????????

//

kunikida, petting atsushi’s hair: good job on the job atsushi

atsushi, not thinking about what he’s saying: kunikida i like u so much should i kill a bear for u?

kunikida, slightly confused, slightly flattered: uhh no???????

//

atsushi, at the store: lemme just get something for kyouka-

the tiger: we shall hunt until we find something suitabl-

atsushi: no.

//

atsushi: im sorry i transformed last night, snuck out of ur place, hunted down a goose, broke back in, left it in the living room table, and then climbed on top of u, still a tiger, and then fell asleep and only transformed back now, after u had to use rashomon to get tiger me off u 

akutagawa, dead tired: yeah i don’t know what the appropriate response is but ur cleaning the bloo-

akutagawa: wait wtf do u mean theres a dead goose in the living room

atsushi: do u not like goose :(

akutagawa: that is NOT the issue here

//

yeah

[yeotopiaa]

Ateez reaction to you crying

i hope you'll like it ! you can request anytime !

....................................................

Hongjoong :

Comforting boyfriend,

Hongjoong immediately move to comfort you, either by holding you, speaking kind words, or offering a tissue. He asks what's wrong and listen attentively to your concerns.

Seonghwa :

Concerned boyfriend,

He become immediately concerned and ask what happened. Seonghwa want to know if there's anything he can do to help or if there's something he can do to prevent you from crying in the future.

Yunho :

Affectionate boyfriend,

Yunho become more affectionate when you're crying, wanting to hold you or cuddle with you to provide comfort. He also offer words of affirmation or remind you how much he loves you

Yeosang :

Anxious boyfriend,

Yeosang become anxious when you're crying, unsure of how to react or what to say. He feel helpless and want to do something to make you feel better, but he's not sure what that is.

San :

Understanding boyfriend,

San become very understanding when you're crying, empathizing with your emotions and trying to see things from your perspective. He's being patient and supportive, allowing you to express your feelings without judgment.

Mingi :

Apologetic boyfriend,

Mingi become apologetic when you're crying, even if he isn't the cause of the tears. He apologize for any role he may have played in the situation, or for not being able to prevent your tears.

Wooyoung :

Empathetic boyfriend,

Wooyoung become very empathetic when you're crying, feeling your emotions as if they were his own. He may cry along with you or express deep sadness on his behalf.

Jongho :

Protective boyfriend,

In addition to becoming angry or upset, Jongho become protective when you're crying. He want to make sure that you're safe and secure, both physically and emotionally.

....................................................

I hope you liked it, you can request anytime, it helps me a lot !

Also i'm sorry if theres any spelling mistakes, english is not my first language

Stay safe, love y'all

[basil-does-arttt]

МАЖА

a CoD OC ive been working on and writing a fic for! Fic link here:

Some sketches with her and the crew as well sans. Laswell and Nikolai because i forgot

Some little infodump about her relationships with the crew as well:

Price - She trusts him + Laswell the most out of all the 141, if theres anybody she'd go to with a problem its him.

Gaz - Shes fine with him really, he's friendly to her so she doesnt mind the guy. She does appreciate his de-escelating of simon tho

Ghost/Simon - speaking of; the man, the myth and the legend himself. (As a heads up! I count Ghost and Simon as two seperate "characters" in the same body, not seperate personalities per-say but like 'Ghost' is an alter-ego of sorts.) She trusts Ghost on solely a "you're my ally during this mission" kind of basis, they keep eachother alive only because they have to. But when it comes to Simon, she keeps her distance only because he's a bit hostile toward her really, being salty over Soap's death. But they do get along sometimes.

Laswell: Like Price she trusts her a lot more than Gaz or Ghost, but gets a bit tense around her sometimes thanks to Kate's CIA background.

Nikolai: some days she wants to thank this man with chocolate covered in gold, other days she wants to saw his head off with a rusty wire. 'Nuff said.

Ah sorry for ranting anyways i hope she's liked, i hope people like the fic too okay bye :> <3

[mollymauk-teafleak]

can I go where you go?

I wanted to write something short, sweet and featuring old married navy pilots. Huge thanks to @hangsters who is my favourite person on the planet.

Please reblog and go comment over on Ao3!

------

Maverick knows theres a lot he isn't very good at. He's not good at following orders. He's not good at playing by the rules. He's not good at listening.

But one thing he was always good at was flying planes. And now, he's not a naval aviator anymore. He's a retired naval aviator.

So what the hell is he supposed to do now?

------

He was never Maverick in his dreams. 

In there, he was always still Pete Mitchell, even now, even after forty years. In fact, they were one of only two places where he still was. 

It was like real life but viewed on a screen that was blowing in the wind, things trembled and swelled and shifted in front of him. He reached for the throttle but missed it the first few times, groping blindly as the sky outside of the windshields shimmered in nonexistent heat. But Pete didn’t need to see anything to know the danger was out there, the black shapes hunting him down, faster and meaner than he could ever be. Pete was running out of time, he knew that with the cold, chilling certainty of a dream. When he was awake, he always saw that way out, even if it was one he had to make himself, but there was no winning against his own mind. They had minutes, maybe seconds. 

But those seconds didn’t just belong to Pete Mitchell. He had Bradley in the seat behind him, at least mostly Bradley. Sometimes things would shift and it would be Goose behind him, laughing and grinning, unaware of death standing just at his shoulder. But even when it was Bradley, he spoke with the voice of his younger self, a voice that sounded like it should be coming from somewhere around Pete’s hip, clinging to his leg, begging him for help. It’s not working! And it wouldn’t work, there was no ejecting from this. 

I’m sorry. Alarms were blaring, the wind was rushing. The blues of sky and sea condensed into smoke, a fire they were flying right into and couldn’t avoid. I’m sorry. Pete was talking to Goose, to Carole, to Ice, to Bradley and it wasn’t enough for any of them. I’m sorry. 

The moment the fire engulfed them, his eyes snapped open, same as every other time he had this dream, leaving him lying on his back in a tangle of sweat damp blankets. There were worse nightmares, that was for sure, he could at least instantly wake up and tell himself you did it, you pulled it off, you got the kid home safe. 

But the weight on his chest didn’t lift, even as their bedroom came into focus around him, as the sound of soft breathing beside him replaced the sound of the screaming alarms and whistling air that would run out too soon. The dream had let him go but the anxiety was still hissing in his nerves and churning his stomach. 

He was never Maverick in his dreams. But at least he always got to wake up and know he was Maverick, that he owned that name completely and earned it every day in the air. 

This morning, he wasn’t so sure. 

Maverik had opened his eyes to a perfect Saturday morning. He didn’t know what time it was, it was an hour late enough to honey the room with warm sunlight. Not quite the fierce San Diego heat, just the promise of it, not too much that he couldn’t turn and burrow back under the blankets. Not something Mav had ever actually done before. Navy pilots didn’t tend to sleep in on Saturdays. 

But he wasn’t a navy pilot anymore. And he had no idea what retired Navy pilots were supposed to do. 

He’d known it was coming for a while, disentangling from the bureaucratic monster that was the United States military took a hell of a long time, even when you were sleeping with the guy who was meant to be in charge of it all. There had been months between him and Ice kissing on the carrier after the Dagger mission, that moment where he’d realized he was done, that he wasn’t strong enough to live any more moments thinking he’d never see his family again, and right now. The morning after his last official day of service.

He was probably supposed to have spent those months processing everything, coming to terms with his decision. Ice had tried to coax him into conversations a few times over the last months. Not outright, they’d been together long enough for him to know better than that. But there had been strong hands on the small of his back in quiet moments out on the deck, a shoulder for him to lean on for a few minutes of silence after he’d finished his request letter but hadn’t had the courage to put it in the envelope yet. Spaces where Mav could have taken the lid off a little, shook things out at Ice’s feet and let him hold him in one piece if things went bad. 

And lying here now, no longer a Naval aviator, wearing a set of dog tags around his neck that were just a symbol now, Maverick really wished he’d taken those chances, stepped into those spaces. Maybe he’d know what to do right now if he had. Because all Mav had as far as plans went was to try and not throw up.

“I can feel you vibrating, Mitchell…” 

Mav started guiltily, only now realizing that he was tapping his fingers on the mattress and bouncing his heel, “Shit…”

Ice’s chuckle was rough with sleep, his eyes slightly clouded when he rolled over to smile at Maverick, though the creases around his eyes hadn’t changed since ‘86. He hadn’t wanted to wake him, finding the sun up before his husband must have happened only a handful of times. But he couldn’t lie and say the moment Ice wrapped his arms around him, he didn’t breathe a little easier. 

“It’s okay. Wanted to be up with you anyway,” Ice’s voice didn’t lose its rough edge, he always sounded like he’d just woken up lately and that was on a good day. But it was a strong vibration against Maverick’s ear as he burrowed into his bare chest, “You had a nightmare?”

It wasn’t a question really. Ice knew him too well, enough that he’d also know it wasn’t the nightmare that was upsetting Mav.

“Yeah…” Maverick’s fingers found the chain around Ice’s neck, the one that matched his own, letting the familiar coolness of it make him brave, “Ice…I don’t know what I’m supposed to do now.”

He felt lips against his forehead, pressing softly, “Sweetheart…”

Maverick sighed, “You can tell me I’m an idiot. I know I should have figured this shit out about three months ago.”

Ice snorted, shifting onto his back and bringing Maverick with him, letting his husband sprawl, cat like, on his chest. Roughened fingers trailed down his spine and softened the knowing smirk on Ice’s face. 

“Sweetheart, you wouldn’t have got this figured out in three years and we both know it. This was always going to hurt a little, even if you had listened to me.”

“Well, good thing I didn’t bother doing that then,” Mav muttered against Ice’s skin, still warm from the sheets, still smelling faintly of soap from his shower before bed. 

He could feel Ice smiling as he traced his spine up and down, “Well, we’re here now and there’s no time like the present. So what’s bothering you, sweetheart?”

Maverick tried to marshal the thoughts that were forming the small storm in his stomach. He felt the urge to clam up, lock down, to preserve some of the easy confidence that shielded him along with the sunglasses and leather jacket. But he had none of that right now. He didn’t need it, not with Ice, he never had. 

“I…I guess I’m not sure how to…not be a pilot?” he wound his fingers more securely in the chain of his husband’s tags, “I don’t remember liking myself a lot before I was one.”

Ice’s lazy grip on him tightened a fraction, “That wasn’t you. It was where you were and what was happening to you. You’re so far from that, sweetheart, and you’re sure as hell not going back.”

Maverick nodded, finding it so much easier to believe things when Ice said them, like there was some magic in his calm, authoritative voice that made things real, “I know that. I do. I mean, fuck, if you’d told that kid that one day he’d be wearing a set of dog tags that said Captain ‘Maverick’ Mitchell…”

“Not to mention the Admiral’s wedding ring,” Ice teased, hand slipping down to lightly squeeze his hip where he was ticklish. 

“That too…” Mav jerked, grinning crookedly, shifting so that hand could slip a little further, “But you know what I mean. That I’d have my wings, that strangers in the store would call me ‘sir’ without even thinking twice. That I’d be someone’s dad.”

“The best dad she could ask for,” Ice added, “But you know none of that goes away just because you’ve retired, sweetheart.”

“Yeah…” Maverick murmured, though it sounded like he wanted to put a question mark at the end. 

Ice made a gentle noise, rolling them so Maverick was pressed down into the bed, so he could find that anxious gaze and hold it. 

“Mav. All of those things you love about yourself, the Navy didn’t give them to you. You earned them. You worked hard for them and whether you’re a Captain or not, no one’s going to take them from you.”

Maverick exhaled softly, leaning into Ice’s hand, pressing a kiss to his palm, “But…what do I do now? Without the Navy telling me what to do?”

“As if you ever listened in the first place,” Ice flashed him a smile, holding Maverick’s face between his hands like he was something precious, “Well…if you need to be told what to do, then here. We’re going to get out of bed, we’re going to shower. I’m gonna go first because you say I take forever and you’ll sneak in with me and let me wash your hair for you…and then you’ll steal my shirt for when we go get breakfast together. We’ll go to the same place we always go, where the waitress flirts with you but she flirts with me more. And I’ll have to order an extra hash brown because for some unknown reason, you always steal mine rather than just order your own. And then we’ll walk along the beach, you’ll kick water at me because you always do…and then we’ll come home and watch the game, you can tell me all your incorrect opinions about the 49ers. And you’ll fall asleep on my shoulder and…and I’ll remember that I’m the luckiest man on the goddamn planet.” 

Maverick swallowed, feeling heat prickling behind his eyelids when he blinked, “Yeah? That sounds nice.”

Ice brought his forehead down to gently rest on his husband’s, “And after that…well, we’ll figure it out. Together.” 

Maverick put his hands over Ice’s, tangling their fingers together, feeling something unbreakable in that, “If every day looks like that one? Count me in, sweetheart.”

Ice’s lips were warm on his, sure, certain. From that one point of contact, Maverick could feel color flooding in, the sketched out, empty version of his body he’d woken up in suddenly becoming real, becoming completely his own again. He let go of Ice’s hands, wrapping his arms around his husband’s broad shoulders, following the chain of his dog tags again. He kissed him back, fingers tracing old scars on Ice’s skin that Maverick could map even better than his own, ghosting over freckles he knew like the constellations, until the breath in his lungs was more Ice’s than his. 

“Do have one…one small note…” he panted against Ice’s lips, “Any room in that schedule for you to rock my world, sweetheart?”

Ice flashed the smile that had been making Mav’s knees weak since the eighties and probably would still when they were in their eighties, “I’ll make time to do it twice...”

Maverick’s head fell back against the pillows, his grin crooked and wholly his own, “God, I love you…”

“I love you too, Pete Mitchell…” Ice left him with a kiss on the cheek before moving down his body.

The world became the warmth of the morning sun on his bare skin, the comforting weight of Ice against him, the brush of his lips trailing from his neck to his chest to his stomach to the inside of his thighs. A world he could feel comfortable in, one made with a space for him, one that Ice had given him and he’d earned himself. 

There were two places where he was still Pete Mitchell. One was his nightmares, where it was a way to cut him down, to send him spinning in free fall without his wings and shatter on the ground

The other place was in Tom Kazansky’s arms. And there it was only because Ice loved every single part of him, he would put him back together and not change a single thing. He could be Pete Mitchell, he could wear the name he’d been given before he knew he was a man. He could be Lieutenant, he could be Captain, he could be wearing whatever name and Ice would see the same person and love him the same. 

Pete Mitchell took a breath and started looking forward. 

[pigeonpeach]

Yandere academy Childe x Onee-san reader

A/n please read: hello! This is fanwork of another writers au aka @yestrday ‘s yandere genshin academy au. I heavily recommend binging their stuff its really good. In particular this piece takes on the sort of onee-san (big sister) route where basically y/n /reader spends most of their time taking care of the first years and overall just being a big ol sweetheart. I just LOVED how the author depicts the older students reacting and getting all jealous over not having y/n’s full attention so i had to write something. Of course i did put some of my own traits into y/n. My favs were Childe and Zhongli so i might write a version with Zhongli instead if i get the inspo.

Cn: not much really, childe is a lil creepy and touchy but y/n is kinda into it lowkey. I cant write make out scenes but theres still alot of it. Also minor mentions of hurt with bennett.

Who could possibly hate l/n y/n. A third year student with a great reputation and grades. Lots of friends, and lots and lots of admirers. But their kindness was their most beloved trait. Y/n always packed extra food for lunch in case a dear friend had forgotten or lost theirs. Y/n often helped out at the nurses office and seemed to have the most soothing voice as they’d patch up students who could be sobbing and shaking. In general they were a well liked and somewhat popular student so it was no surprise they had plenty of admirers. If only they had as much time as Y/n’s biggest flaw was also their kindness. It never felt good to turn people down. Especially when they themselves would love to spend time with their fellow seniors. However they knew Bennett would be sulking if he didn’t see them at lunch today. It honestly left a poor taste in their mouth having to turn down Venti’s offer of a picnic at lunch today. But they didn’t want to pass by the nurses office again and see him in there. Y/n’s heart was solid gold but gold itself is a weak metal that can easily bend.

What was supposed to be a picnic with Childe ended up getting canceled last minute as you held a bruised Bennett in their arms. Wrapping the bandages around tightly but not too tight. “I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to knock over all those chemicals in the science room!” No matter how exhausted you were though, you never seemed to get tired of Bennett, he was such a lovable little kid, you couldn’t help it. Taking care of people was just a natural instinct within you, which made you get along splendidly with Bennett who more often than not needed taking care of. “Its not your fault Benny I know. I don’t blame you one bit, I’m just glad none of those chemicals were dangerous.” You were finally finished with the last of the bandages and gave Bennett a little kiss on the cheek. “Now you’ll probably be in the nurses office for awhile, I’ll go bring you back some lunch okay? Just wait here”Bennett, his face turned a delicate pink as he eagerly shook his head.

You smiled as you exited out the door. Your tranquility was soon interrupted as you made your by a sudden tug backwards. You could barely blink before feeling your back pinned up against the lockers.

“You’re really messing with me aren’t you~ I hardly get to have any time with you nowadays and you go off to play nanny with that first year!” Childe’s fist was clenched tightly next to your head resting against the cold metal. “I was looking forward to our little date today, you had me thinking I could finally have a second of your oh so precious time and then you run off to comfort him!” He pressed himself into you trapping you against the locker.

“Okay I’m sorry about forgetting but you’re acting psychotic! What on earth are you trying to pull here huh? We’re still at school you dumb-aAH!” You barely got to cover your mouth as Childe eagerly bit into your neck. You bit your lip out of shock, you could barely focus on anything, you hadn’t exactly ever done this before. To witness Childe in such a primal and instinctual mood felt so intimate. You were almost flattered that simply forgetting a lunch hangout had been enough to get him so worked up over you... The sensation of Childe possessively biting into your neck,You could feel your resolve and hesitation melt as you try one last time to pry him off. Finally with a wet smack of his lips he gleefully pulled back revealing a big bruise right on your jugular, out in the open, unable to be hidden with the collar of your uniform. He grinned with a smile you could only describe as manic. Why was it kind of hot though-

“Y-you… You IDIOT! What am I going to do if the staff see this! Gosh I knew you were careless but i didn’t think you would be downright stupid!” Childe basked in pride at your reddened face. As you quickly opened your locker trying to find a jacket of something to cover with.

“Oh please, this wasn’t careless at all. I made sure no body was coming around these parts at this time. And besides, I have a scarf you could borrow if you’re really that insecure about it~” He pressed his mouth right against their ear. You practically died inside then.

“You better! I could get expelled if the school thought I was doing something indecent! I’m not wasting my scholarship just because you’re a little pent up you know?” You practically tugged the scarf off of his and lazily wrapped it around yourself. You were ready to chew him out again when he fixed the scarf to look more presentable. Your cheeks were warm and pink then. He chuckled.

“See? you really have been depriving yourself haven’t you, all this work just to keep that first year alive, you keep rejecting and rejecting my offers,saying you’re ‘just too busy today or maybe tomorrow’ when deep down I can tell you want nothing more than to let me take advantage of you~” He sneaked a quick peck at your cheek making you blush even more.

“Y-you’re wrong! Ah! Stop trapping me against the locker I’m trying to use it! Besides its super inappropriate!” Although, it did feel kind of nice being in his grasp. You spent practically your whole week helping Razor and Bennett prepare for some big tests in Chemistry, and your whole year so far was practically baby sitting the first years which as much as you enjoyed, wasnt always so... rewarding, it could get draining at times to be relied on too much, there was something about just pressing your back against the warm embrace of Childe that made those worries melt. You felt so… so.. desirable. You knew alot of your male peers sought after you romantically but you had no idea he was so desperate just to be with you, who wouldn’t be flattered to be so utterly wanted.

“My my, I didn’t think you would be this easy to wind up girlie, I thought you would have alot more fight in you but aside from your mouth you’re practically just begging for me. I can just tell you’re enjoying this. So why don’t you cut the talk, just let me spoil you for today hm? I’ll forgive you then for forgetting our picnic?” Childe’s hands ran up your curves leaving you to hiss in shock. His pelvis pressed oh so tightly as he pinned you to the locker infront of you.

“You..you’re really not giving up are you?” You turned your head around to weakly scowl at the smug ginger. Which he then proceeded to take the opportunity to kiss you on the lips, the last of your resistance practically melted then, worst case scenario the bell goes off and he HAS to leave then surely. He couldn’t be that dense as to continue past lunch surely! You hear his muffled chuckles as he deepened the kiss and tighten his grip on your waist. His other hand slamming against the locker keeping you from sliding out. You couldn’t help but just wrap your hands around his neck which caused him to jolt in surprise. He pulled away briefly just to look into your embarrassed face.

“I didn’t think you were that touch-starved! Don’t tell me those first years don’t know a thing or two about romance! You devote so much to them and they dont even know how to hold you right?”He laughed. You scowled.

“I-i don’t see them that way! Besides I just like taking care of people its just… I haven’t.. really.. had the chance to… be taken care of like this…you’re.. fuck just shut up and kiss me or I’ll find someone else to!” You practically dragged him back into the kiss much to his delight. He eagerly continued with the session as you let him devour you. However he pulled away a bit too soon for your liking.

“You’re perfect for me you know? Every little thing about you just enamors me sometimes. I know you feel the same too, I can tell you want this, you want me to pick you up in my arms and take you away from all thi-MPHHHff.” You pulled him by his tie back into the kiss. You didn’t have the patience to listen to his rambles. You’ve been deprived of affection for so long and if Childe was going to bother you then you might as well drain him for all he’s got to offer right? At least he seemed all the more willing. He pressed himself so tightly against you that you were convinced he was trying to absorb you. Your hands wrapped around his neck. It felt so… so

RING!!!!!!! Snapping you out of your touch starved craze was the lunch bell signaling the end of lunch and your little.. session with Childe. Catching Childe off guard, you pushed him off finally separating yourself from him as you got your lunch box and ran off to give it to Bennett. Leaving Childe a sweaty and riled up mess. Leaning against the opposite locker he grinned like a cheshire cat.

After dropping your lunch off to Bennett who luckily did not recognize your scarf, you raced to your class and made it just in time. You very shamefully sat down in your seat knowing at least a good chunk of the people here recognized who’s scarf you were wearing, but it was better than them seeing that bruise he left. You could practically feel Scaramouche’s gaze burrowing a hole in your head. You only hoped this class would be over before he decided to strangle you with the darn scarf.

[purgemarchlockdown]

On Muu for a bit: Id like to say theres a balance here of not…horrifically demonizing a teenage girl but also not acting as if she doesn't perpetuates some really shit power structures.

Muu T2 VD:

Muu: Wow, poor thing... I’ll teach you! Friends aren’t like that, you know. Rather than using each other for something, we just get along because we’re comfortable around each other. That’s all. Es: Well, I’m sorry about that. Muu: Haruka-kun is really nice! He accepts anything I say, he listens to anything I tell him. For me, that’s really comfortable. Es: And that’s… “friendship”? Muu: What do you mean? Of course we’re friends! Haruka-kun is happy with it, so it only has benefits for both of us! Es: I, as someone who has no friends, can’t judge, of course, but isn’t that just exploitation? Muu: Exploitation…? Um, I don’t really understand, but… I do help him pick out clothes [in return], and I recently gave him a hairpin I didn’t need anymore as a hand-me-down!

Now this isn't the greatest sign but Es and Jackalope have shown to be unreliable and while it might not be entirely Healthy, healthy relationships are like a wild unicorn in this place. I'm a 0308 friendship supporter I can't argue Just On This.

Except...

You know how Haruka's mother keeps tropical fish that showcases how her mistreatment of Haruka is even worse because she clearly has the time and money and doesn't invest it in her child? (Post found! It's this one by red-moon-at-night thanks to @/tokyogruel for informing me!) Muu T1 Interrogation:

T1Q14: Hobbies? A: Taking care of tropical fish. They're small and cute.

Haruka T2 VD:

Haruka: Muu-san is my mother.

Through association we can infer that Muu probably thinks of Haruka as "small and cute, like a pet"

Here's a question: Why do abuse victims stay in abusive relationships? There's a lot of very complex answers for this because of the nature of the question but here's two possible reasons:

The victim feeling that the relationship is a mix of good times, love and hope along with the manipulation, intimidation and fear. The victim's lack of knowledge of or access to safety and support

We already Know Haruka is Willing To Let Himself Be Hurt if it means Staying Together With Muu.

Haruka: So what if she’s using me? Isn’t it a good thing to be used? For someone to think of me as worthy enough to use me… isn’t that something to be happy about? Es: Haruka… you… Haruka: If you don’t forgive Muu-san, I’m going to kill you. Es: You really have no learning ability whatsoever. You can’t kill me. Haruka: Ah, right… Then… I’ll die.

And We already know Muu has a history of participating in these sort of structures as the perpetrator of them.

I don't think Muu would PURPOSEFULLY mistreat Haruka. I don't even think Muu is a master manipulator or anything. Muu can be as Nice and Genuinely Helpful as she wants but, that doesn't mean she Cannot harm Haruka.

I'm not going to Say she is, but it is something she did Before, and I think we gotta keep that in mind when it comes to how she and Haruka interact.

[yearningandpatheticaboutit]

CHAPTER 15: A FAMILIAR FACE

warnings: smut, unprotected sex (wrap it), mentions of sa, mentions of violence, mentions of stalking, mentions of pedophilia.

wc: 6353

prev chapter

***

yaera

i wake up feeling the sun on my bare boobs. i didnt have a single dream last night, but i remember everything. my face feels stiff and puffy from crying but god, the rest of me feels like i just woke up from paradise.

san's arm is draped over my stomach. i look down at him and he's playing a game on his barely functional phone. i giggle seeing his fingers slide across the cracks and it makes him look up at me.

"oh you're awake. morning," he immediately sits up, taking his arm with him.

"morning," i mumble out and stretch my arms, and san's eyes immediately drift to my boobs. "you should really get a new phone."

san pulls his gaze away as if its a chore and looks down at his destroyed android. strands of his hair fall down his forehead majestically, and i cant help but stare. god every little thing about him turns me on.

"she's still up and running. i'll get a new one when she completely gives up on me."

i snort and sit up. "aren't you loyal? thats cute."

"not loyal, just broke."

i look at the money sprawled out on the floor, remembering how it fell out of my dress when he ripped it off of me. the flashbacks bring a smile to my face.

"not for long you wont be."

"so..." he awkwardly drawls. "last night–"

"we dont have to talk about it."

his face creases in confusion. "i thought you didnt want to pretend like it didnt happen?"

"we dont have to pretend like it didnt happen, but we dont have to talk about it now."

hes shirtless. frankly i know if we talk about what happened now, it'll open up a blackhole of conversations. like what happens next. and what about santo.

"we're gonna talk about it at some point right?" he presses, all serious suddenly. "because theres a lot of things...a lot happened last night. things im worried about."

i try to hide my discomfort with a smile. there are things i can easily talk about. my sister dying, how fucked up i am. but im not a fan of talking about my weak moments. i hate being weak infront of men. i know the position will stay that way after it all.

once they see you like that, weak and helpless, its all they'll ever see. i dont want san to see me like that.

"we'll talk about it. i promise. but what i want to know is...is it going to happen again?"

"is what going to–oh."

san's cheeks start reddening and he rubs the back of his head, exposing his massive bicep. his skin is so pretty. everything–everything is so pretty.

"it can happen again. as long as we dont get too carried away. i dont want to forget what this is really about."

honestly, i didnt hear much after hearing his first sentence. i move toward him and lightly stroke his chest with my fingers and his eyes darken. he clasps my wrist with his fist and i jump in my skin.

"im sorry–"

"are you trying to get fucked?" he asks, making my mouth drop open. but i catch myself quickly and smile.

"would that be so bad?"

"yes."

i pout. "and why is that?"

"because we both know once it happens, its not going to stop."

fuck, thats all i needed to hear. i sit up on my knees and inch closer to him, looking down at his pretty face. i take my other hand and stroke his face, lightly brushing the skin on his lips. he looks hypnotized.

"who says we have to stop, san?" i ask lowly. "we can do whatever the fuck we want."

"you want it now?"

"yes."

"fuck."

san pulls me onto his lap, making me yelp. in a second my thighs are wrapped around him and he starts rubbing circles on my nipples. he starts kissing them hungrily, occassionally grazing them with his teeth and sending shivers down my spine.

my core is pulsing in seconds. i go for his neck, sucking lightly and planting soft kisses all over. he reaches for the drawer in his nightstand and pulls out a condom. i stop midway and raise an eyebrow at him.

"so you're prepared huh?" i giggle. "i thought you were bitchless."

"and i am. i use them to clean my shoes," san mutters.

"wait, before you put that on," i slide back and plant myself between his legs, putting my finger on the band of his boxers. "may i?"

he nods wordlessly, his mouth parted erotically as i pull his dick from his boxers. its rock hard and fills my whole hand, the prettiest blend of pink and purple ive seen.   its warm and pulses in my hands, the veins just bulging out like its starving. fuck.

i lower my mouth onto him, softly sucking the tip first before taking him in fully. his hands immediately go to my hair, his grip gentle as he holds it back. fuck this, im sucking the soul out of this man.

i keep my pace slow and torturous while massaging his rim, fighting a smile when he hisses and grips my hair tighter.

"fuck...why are you so good at this?" he moans, almost in disgust. i harden my lips and quicken my pace, savouring his taste till lines of drool run down my jaw. san lets out unholy whimpers, only making me go harder. i love having him so weak, so helpless from nothing but my mouth. i force him all the way to the back of my throat, occassionally rubbing him up against my palette. his thighs start to shiver and he pulls me off of him, bringing me up to his face.

he kisses me harshly, desperately, like hes trying his best to stop me from going again, his grip only tightening in my hair. i retract from the kiss, wiping the wetness from my jaw.

"why'd you make me stop?" i ask innocently. "was i not doing it well enough?"

"shut up, i know you're smug," he says breathlessly. "you know exactly what you're doing."

my hand is still around his shaft and i start stroking and squeezing. san throws his head back and looks at the ceiling. i give his tip a kitten lick and a shiver goes through him.

"you're so easy," i mock playfully. "all i have to do is use my mouth and you're helpless."

"oh really?" he asks hoarsely, his voice deep and fucking sexy. "lets see how easy you are then."

san grabs me under my arms, making me yelp as he flips me over. he drags my underwear off and tosses it somewhere, not even looking back. san erotically slips his fingers into my mouth, before slowly inching them inside me. a silent gasp falls from my lips and it feels like my body is curving inside out. san starts slowly pumping, my wetness soaking his fingers till they shine in the sun.

he continues laying down hot kisses all over my torso, eventually dragging his warm lips down to my core. without warning he drags his tongue up my slit, making me shiver.

"and im easy?" san mutters smugly. he doesnt even give me a moment to process things before he puts his lips back on me, pumping inside me with his fingers and tongue-fucking me all at once.

"san..." pathetic whimpers are tortured out of me, my hands gripping his hair as i struggle to hold it together.

"mmmm?" he hums against me, practically making out with my hole. "you taste so fucking good."

san's words make me clench my thighs around his head, locking his tongue inside of me. at this point he doesn't care. hes eating like a man that's been starved in a prison camp. my body is hotter than a laptop running minecraft. tight sensations are rippling through my legs and i know im close. but i dont stop him. i hedonistically indulge in everything hes giving me, just because im greedy. i want more.

san abruptly stops, my ever-climbing high hitting a wall. a desperate whine escapes me. "why'd you stop?"

"you're not coming until i've had you," he tells me, coming up to kiss me again. i can taste myself on him and no wonder he was so greedy with it.

san, while his lips are glued to mine, pushes my legs apart and slowly pushes his pulsing dick inside of me.

i feel his warmth through the condom, his girth filling me up and making me shiver. its been so long, its like im a virgin again. he doesnt move, just staring me down as i squeeze onto him. his breathing is heavy, his eyes remote. it looks like hes enjoying himself with just the feeling, but he doesnt know what to do with it.

"you tell me when to stop, okay?" he tells me softly. "you tell me if im hurting you."

if i wasnt so horny i would cry at how sweet he sounds. but unfortunately for him, in this moment in time, i would let choi san do anything to me.

"i want you to tear me apart," i force out.

san doesnt destroy me like i thought he would. instead he goes with slow, deep thrusts that make me feel all of him. his chest is pressed against mine, his breathing rough at my ear as my legs wrap around him. i get drunk on him, the room filling with squelching sounds as his pace grows steadier, still maintaining his depth.

i start to feel his strength on me as he goes harder. im crashing under him, the moans and whimpers forcing out of me embarrassingly loud. i dig my nails into his muscular back, kickstarting a pace that threatens to make me burst. san's hand tightly cups my hip as he goes harder, holding me in place as i take it.

his bed is screeching. i couldnt mutter any words aside from my lewd winces. all i wanted to know was why couldnt this happen sooner. fuck.

"this was what you wanted right?" san whispers to me, finally making eye contact. i know i look so fucked and desperate. "from the beginning?"

"san i-" i gasp as he lifts my knee to my chest, hitting deeper. i toss my head back and san starts kissing my neck, gently nibbling. the sensations are eating at me. i feel it pooling in my stomach. san starts rubbing me and fucking at the same time, and eventually i cream all over his fingers and cock.

but san doesnt stop. i feel like im going to cry out of happiness. he pauses to flip me over on my stomach, arching my ass slightly so he can slip it in from the back. the overstimulation makes me lightheaded but i dont stop him. san pumps himself into me till i feel him laying on my back, breathing hard and going lame. by the time its over, my drool is all over his sheets and my vision is blurry.

"fuck." is all i hear him say. fuck indeed, and fuck we did.

***

i didnt allow for that awkward conversation to happen after. as soon as we were done, i got dressed and made for my way home. san gave me a blank stare when i left, his face trying to convey emotions but failing miserably. when i got home, he texted me and i felt my stomach turn.

sannie: you running away from me?

not from him. but from his questions. and what would come next.

i have issues with intimacy. major issues. i tried working on it, always thinking about it did nothing. all it did was make me realize how undateable i am. because ive never tried to date anyone ive never had a poor soul to inconvenience.

san and i werent a couple, fuck, we werent even exclusive. but i could tell that i was about to become his problem.

i stood in the foyer of my house, barefoot as i debated what i should send back to him.

me: nope, relax. just dealing with family.

he replies almost instantly.

sannie: OK. when can i see you again?

me: relax you horndog. you have one piece and now you're getting greedy

sannie: Don't call me that. i mean so we can take those photos back to my contact. dont you want to know whos been seeing your sister?

my eyes freeze at the message. getting my back blown out completely made me forget about that. even with the money we made off that deal i wasnt even thinking about it.

me: i probably wont be able to do today. monday?

sannie: I'll arrange it.

me: thank you

san leaves me on read after that and i find myself staring at my phone. at his contact. i finally got what i wanted. we slept together, i feel better. but why do i feel...weird.

maybe i wasnt supposed to do it right after santo tried assaulting me. but san was the only thing that made me forget. i didnt even know what i was going to do about him. i wanted to tell someone, anyone. but these people wouldnt care, or do anything about it.

my only choice was to make my money and get the fuck out. i snuck up into my room and put the money i made into my box in the wall and sealed it off again. as i come out of the closet, my mother sits on my bed analysing my entire body.

i jump in my skin. "hey...mama."

she gives me a deep frown. "i thought you said you werent feeling well. but you come back this time?"

"i slept over at a friends house. i took some pills and knocked out for a long time."

"i cant understand whats wrong with you, yaera. are you doing drugs?"

my jaw drops. "what? why would you ask that?"

she shakes her head at me with both pity and disgust. "i cant explain it. but you do not look like yourself. you look ill. please go in the shower and fix yourself."

maybe i look fucked up because i was almost assaulted by your business partner. i want to say it but i hold my tongue. what will she do? what has she ever done to help me?

"its almost her birthday," i tell my mother before she walks out. she pauses at the door and doesnt look at me.

guilt. i hate feeling it. but i'd weaponise it if i had to. its one of my few weapons against my parents that work today. its one of the things that never cease to effect. deep down i know they feel guilty, and it must be about a lot of things because anything silences them off.

"you mean its almost your birthday," my mother mutters. i see her force a smile as she leaves, still never turning back to look me in the eyes.

i go and take out my clothes to wear for the day when my phone suddenly rings. i dont recognize the number. i pick it up reluctantly, pressing the phone to my cheek with my shoulder.

"hello?"

"tesoro?"

i freeze when i hear his voice. my chest starts to stiffen, feeling like the veins and arteries under there are tangling themselves.

"im so sorry for last night. i dont know what came over me...i want you to want it. and im more than willing to wait for you, im sorry tesoro. i will not harm you again..." he says, all in italian.

my phone shivers along with my hand. my voice is clogged in my throat and it feels like the room is spinning.

i pull my voice from the depths, feeling my eyes burning as they threaten to gush. "go fucking kill yourself, santo. die and burn in fucking hell you scum."

i click off the phone and it immediately starts ringing again. i block the number like i blocked all the others and slide down my wall in defeat. im exhausted.

i dont hear from him after that. and when monday comes i've inhaled too much nicotine to care. my hands keep smelling like tobacco and i'll admit, its not the best ive smelled in my life.

i freeze when i see san in the parking lot. i dont know why, it makes sense that he should be there. hes always there. but its so weird now.

apparently im the only one that feels that way. san marches up to me, grabs my arm and pulls me aside a wall like hes trying to hide from someone. i look at him in confusion.

"some weird shit is going on, seriously," he tells me with a low voice. "you wont believe what just happened."

"what happened?" if something weirds san out then it must be weird as fuck.

"jongho," the way san breathes his name is heavy. i immediately tense up.

"is it about the party? did he try to fight you again?"

"no. he offered me money. for the pictures we took from him."

he wants his stalker pictures back. hearing that alone makes me want to taze him in the side of his head, hoping he never wakes up again. but the other part of me thinks smarter.

"what did you say?" i ask him. san looks at me like im crazy.

"i said no obviously. its your sisters pictures," he scowls at me.

i know jongho does anything to get what he wants. "how much money did he offer you?"

san sighs. "a lot. like a load."

"under 10k?"

"yeah, but not far off from it."

i go silent. with the money we made off the drugs and the money wooyoung stole from those other gangsters, san was almost at his target for the drugs he failed to sell.

"yaera, please dont tell me you're thinking of it," san scoffs, shaking his head at me. "those are your sisters pictures. and we still have to ask my contact to develop them to see who the guy in the pictures is."

"we're going today right? give him the pictures when we're done with it." i decide.

san stares at me in disbelief, but i've made up my mind. "i dont want those pictures. they might be of her, but i dont want to see her like that. i dont wanna look at her through his eyes. might as well get money out of it. that way you can pay off your drug debt and we can keep the rest of the rosies to ourselves."

"you know that isnt where it ends, right?" san checks me. "i pay off that debt, Miss A gives me another assignment, and then its the next thing...and another thing after that. this is my life, yaera. i cant just get away from it."

with the way he spoke, it sounded like he was trying to crush my hope. i wasnt aware i had any.

i say nothing and san sighs, leaning back against the wall. "top it all off, i still havent heard from wooyoung. since saturday."

that was ominous. wooyoung took off in such a hurry, the fact that he hasnt let san know anything is unsettling.

"wanna go around to his place then? after we see your contact?" i suggest.

san scrunches his face, i know he doesnt like the idea of me tagging along.

"i think its better if you hang back for that. wooyoung stays with other gangsters. i dont want them seeing you...you already know how that went last time."

ah, yes. our first meeting. what memories.

"we'll find him," i reassure him, but it doesnt look like my words are getting taken to heart. it starts getting awkward just lingering there, and i cant believe that san and i slept together.

we're standing here, just existing. we have no business with each other, none at all. not long ago he wanted nothing to do with me. then we went and did...that.

its going to happen again, i know it. am i wrong for wanting it to happen really soon? sooner than is appropriate?

san clears his throat and gets up from against the wall. "well...see you in bio, marino."

i dont greet back, and instead just offer a quick smile. its like he just read my thoughts.

i end up seeing san at lunch first. i get bored from existing by myself. funny thing is, yeosangs not at school. he must have gotten the shit scared out of him. the jocks that beat up san and wooyoung are also out of the equation, completely avoiding san's existence and steering clear with their bruised faces.

san is at the abandoned stairwell and i plop down next to him on the step. he jumps out of the daze he was in, turning to look at me with surprised eyes.

"hey," he says softly. san being soft?

"why do you sound so delicate?" i tease him. "is it because you saw my boobies?"

san jumps up and hides his face out of embarrassment. "oh my god, did you come here to terrorize me? im not being weird, you're being weird."

"all i did was ask a question," i feign innocence.

san turns around and tries to put on a stern face, but he looks like a tomato. i cant take him seriously. i guess now i can tell my mother that i DID in fact sleep with him.

i get up from my seat and plant myself infront of san, feeling devious. "wanna sneak off into the bathroom?" i test him.

"i dont have condoms here," he tells me. "also really? at school?"

"i dont respect this building," i shrug. "and they have condoms in the girls bathroom. they care about us being safe."

"of course you don't care about this school, you can drop out and you'll be fine," san says. "i, however, could get expelled and my life would be over."

agh. now hes just making me feel guilty. i want to tell him to forget about it, but san picks up his bag and heads down the stairs. he stops at the last step and looks up expectantly. "well, are you coming or what?" he snaps.

fuck this guy. i fight the smile as i get my bag off the ground and follow after him.

***

we sneak into the girls bathroom, with me going in first to check if its clear. when him done, i calls him in and i slip into the last stall. san follows behind me, locking the door.

we throw our bags down on the floor, a brief pause between us where we just stare at each other. san's eyes immediately drift to my lips and he leans in slowly, making the softest contact.

its soft and delicate, and of course i turn it into something animalistic. he gives me fluttery kisses and i take in more and more till im completely devouring his face. his body presses me against the wall, and san's hand reaches up under my skirt and gives one hard tug to my underwear.

it drops to my ankles, and so does he. san sits on his knees, lifts my skirt and drags his tongue up my slit. i shiver at his hot mouth, immediately spreading my legs like a whore. he gives me warm kitten licks that quickly turn into him sucking on my hole. i throw my head back and stare at the ceiling, feeling my soul slowly leaving my body. this is fucking it. this is the closest to heaven im ever gonna get.

the motion is rhythmic and neat and its not too long before my legs start feeling weak. san backs up and sits down on the toilet seat, unbuckling his pants. i hover over him and he pulls me by my tie, making me plop down on his lap just so he can make out with me again.

san grips my hair as he kisses my lips, and i can taste myself all over his tongue. i lift myself slightly so i can pull down his pants, and i slide myself across his throbbing boner. i moan into his mouth at how warm it feels against me, then slowly inch myself onto it.

san abruptly stops, a pained look on his face. "wait...i didnt put the condom on." he whispers.

"lets do it like this, just this once," i say, then plant a kiss on his lips. "come on, you know how it feels with one...why dont you see how it feels without it?"

san tosses his head back in sexual agony and i know i've got him. "you're bad news, marino. really."

san plants his hands into my ass when i start moving, his eyes squeezing shut as i clench on him everytime he thrusts inside me. i grip the sides of the bathroom wall, looking down at him like a god as i sink and rise on him slowly. i can feel every inch of him, our combined heat and throbbing causing the inside of my thighs to be a sloppy mess. when i move too slow for his liking, san bucks his hips into me, making me gasp emptily.

he feels so fucking good. and im not even ovulating. i struggle to hold back my helpless whimpering and san is forced to cover my mouth as his cock rams into me harder with each blow. san widens his leg so i sink down deeper with each thrust, putting his hand out on my clit to rub small, quick circles over it. everything is fast and messy and rushed, making me lose all sense of being. with stimulation coming in at all sides, it feels like im going to burst apart.

he fucks into me at a pace that makes me want to cry and all i can do is place my head against his chest, hopelessly taking it all. someone walking into the bathroom makes san pause mid-stroke, and the person hangs around for an infuriating period of time. they're not even using the bathroom, but its enough to take the energy out of san.

when the person leaves, he gives me a few lazy pumps that feel tame compared to the way he was aggressively slamming into me. i lean in to kiss him one last time, leisurely parting my mouth with his before i finally get off and slip him out of me.

"thanks for reading that i dont wanna take the risk. we can continue this another time," san whispers, pulling himself and his clothes together. i adjust his school tie and shirt, it has massive creases on it from me gripping onto him.

i smile as i fix myself as well. "you wanna continue later on, you say? looks like someone cant get enough of me," i smirk, and san gives me a subtle smile that says more than it needs to.

i know i shouldnt be surprised that san likes fucking me, because after all, hes still a man. its more of a compliment because its him and ive been dying to get in his pants since day one, and i wanted more than just to be in his drug pockets.

i go out and make sure the coast is clear for san to slip out of the bathroom undetected, thereafter i go pee and reapply my make up in the mirror.

***

san

the past few days have not been real at all. apparently im the kind of guy that just fucks in public bathrooms now. i know my mother would probably get a heart attack if she were here.

why am i acting like an animal? i feel disgusting. i AM disgusting. especially because i would definetely do it again.

this time it feels different. maybe because i get to choose the girl and it isnt some random woman Miss A throws at me. i cant rationalize it in my head, knowing that its yaera.

i swear, it wasnt too long ago that i wanted to punt her into the sun for blackmailing me. i think ive gone soft. yet somehow my dick hasnt. she got off me just in time, but my boner still hasnt subsided. its embarrassing and i constantly have to readjust. it barely goes away throughout the day because i keep having flashbacks to her gripping onto me and it drives me insane.

i almost forget about everything else. i remember to call wooyoung again and he doesnt answer. it makes me horrifically worried. hes never gone this long without calling me. i hope he hasnt gotten himself into more bullshit.

when the day ends, yaera and i take the bus to my apartment, where we walk to ningning's tattoo shop after.

yaera is visibly disgusted by the slums but tries to appear nonchalant. she stares too long at the homeless people, she narrows her eyes at the weird grafitti on the walls and absentmindedly holds onto my bicep when we walk. now that i know what she's running from, i dont question why she willingly puts herself in these situations. what she's running from is so much worse. its an internal hell.

the fact that she still hasnt spoken about it bothers me but i dont want to force things. but it would settle me on the inside to know how she feels in general. aside from sex, she's extremely emotionally closed off.

ningning opens the shop after we knock and yaera's eyes go wide when we step inside. ningning shoots me a shocked glance when she sees yaera. "wow, san, a girl? i thought you were gay. or are you just doing me a service by promoting the shop?" she says, making yaera suppress a snort.

i scowl. "you know those pictures you analyzed for me last time? i need one or two developed."

"alright. im ningning, by the way, and you are?" she ignores me and smiles at yaera.

yaera turns to me, checking if she can introduce herself. i nod. "im yaera. cool shop by the way. and sick tattoos."

"thank you!" ningning gushes as we start to walk. "you have any? or do you want any?"

"i'd like a dragon on my back."

"a dragon? wow, that's hot. does it mean anything?"

"it means i get to look hot during sex."

ningning and yaera start giggling and socially exclude me by talking about random things. i check my phone compulsively to see if i got anything from wooyoung but shit is still radiosilent.

"ningning, have you heard from wooyoung lately?" i ask her when we get down in the basement.

"no i havent...but shouldnt you know where he is?" ningning frowns at me, then plops down at her computer. "you know, i thought you'd go into hiding with some of the stuff thats happened recently. its not safe out anymore."

"what do you mean not safe anymore?"

ningning gasps. "you dont know?"

"obviously not, why else would i ask?"

ningning turns slowly in her spinning chair, giving me a dark look. "word on the street is that one of the worst black dragon got out of jail. and he's gonna make shit worse for the 105ths. after he got out of jail, a warehouse at the port got set on fire and a bunch of people died."

i feel the heat leaving my skin all at once. now i know i have to go see Miss A. but i cant go empty handed. i know what this is about and thats the worst thing. if wooyoung's fate is being debated in that garage, i need to at least have all her money to soothe the situation.

"maybe thats why wooyoung isnt calling," ningning offered, but her voice was awkward. "they probably need him to retaliate."

"he'd tell me," i told her, but i wasnt so sure about that. wooyoung could be handling this all by himself because he feels responsible.

i stop talking about it because i feel immensely unsettled. yaera gently rubs my arm and stands close to me, making me feel somewhat comforted. i cant hide how i feel on my face right now and i know it. more black dragon drama, fuck. like i need a gang war in my last year.

"now you just turn up the exposure..." ningning muttered, the picture of yaera's sister and the mystery guy was on the screen and it suddenly brightened. yaera's hand drops from my arm when she sees the man's face.

"im so fucking dumb," she whispers.

i immediately go to hug her. she puts her head in my chest and squeezes me tightly, as if holding me will stop her from bursting into tears.

"you're not stupid." i tell her. "if he could do that to you...who knows what he did to her?"

ningning blinks between the two of us in confusion. "is everything okay?"

"please get those printed, ningning," i tell her. "we're taking it to the police."

yaera shakes her head and pulls away. "no, we can't. it wont do anything."

"what do you mean? we know santo's been grooming your sister now and he probably killed her too!"

yaera squeezes her eyes shut and starts trembling. "it couldnt have been him because he was in Italy at the time. he was having a very public show. i cant believe its him, i feel so stupid. of course he didnt leave her alone. hes probably the reason she could never be with jongho. she was in LOVE with him. this is why i felt like i couldnt tell her he tried touching me...she was too fond of him."

yaera starts taking hard gulps and i think its time to go. i take out my wallet and give ningning her money and she hurriedly goes to print the pictures. yaera paces around the room and starts shaking her hands and i cant tell if she wants to cry or punch the wall.

"shes the reason he projected everything onto me," she mutters, sounding spiteful. "she LOVED that son of a bitch."

"you dont know that, yaera," i tell her. "your sister was a kid too. and you dont know when she started seeing him."

yaera stops and stares at the wall hauntingly. "i do. it had to be after i stopped being a model. after he touched me i dropped everything. then she started doing it and its like she wasnt the same. he went for her after he ruined me."

ningning returns with the printed pictures and i take them instead of yaera. i pull her out of ningning's shop with me and ningning shoots me a worried look. i cant believe we have to go see jongho after this. as if the night isnt bad enough.

when i get into the van, shes silent. shes staring ahead with an emotionless look on her face. i dont start driving immediately, reaching out for her arm instead.

"hey. i know this is heavy but now you have a reason to never go back. you can tell your parents, you have proof."

silence.

"do you still wanna go see jongho? i think you should go home, yae."

"no. lets get your money."

i sigh and start the van, and the drive is cold and quiet. i try to turn on some music but it reminds me of wooyoung and that makes me worry about him even more so i turn the whole radio off. we stop infront of jongho's house and i dont feel like going up his creepy vampire mansion so i make no move to get out. after a few minutes of standing he eventually comes running up to the car window in a navy gown and slippers with a folder to his side.

"if anything is missing in this, i'll send guards to come collect my funds." jongho says. he pauses for a second when he sees yaera in the passenger, she doesnt look at him once.

i give him back his file full of creepy pictures and his camera, having deleted none of whats on it. luckily yaera and i both transfered everything to spare usbs. just in case.

jongho passes me the folder and i hand it to yaera, who immediately starts counting the money. she nods, giving me the heads up that everything is there.

"i have a question for you," i tell jongho. he scowls at me like he doesnt have time for this but makes no budge to move.

"did you and yeosang attack me at the port?"

"what?" jongho scoffs. "why would we be anywhere near there? and why would we attack you?"

"because you've attacked me before."

"that's because you didnt know your place. you took what was mine and you were depriving yeosang from his hobbies."

so it wasnt them. that makes things worse, because i hoped it would be. jongho had no reason to lie now.

i roll up the window and jongho leaves back through his fancy gates. i stay parked for a few minutes, comprehending how fucked up this could get.

i pull out my phone and open the latest news. ive always had to do this to make sure none of the shit i did for Miss A made it into the papers.

but this is big. it doesnt even take me long to find it. with his big time lawyer, black dragon member hongjoong is out of jail due to half the evidence they had against him being inadmissable. now hes roaming the streets, after being suspected of seven murders.

i look at the date. hes been out since wooyoung and i got yunho killed.

***

NEXT CHAPTER

A/N: This reveal HAD TO BE OBVIOUSSS SORRY FOR TAKING SO LONG TO UPDATE GUYS IVE BEEN FCKING GOIJG THROUGH IT MY LIFE IS HORRIBLE RN BUT HERES THE CHAPTER HOPE U GUYS LIKE IT..ILYYY THANK YOU FOR EVERYONE THATS BEEN SUPPORTING THE STORY. OH AND FREE PALESTINE 🇵🇸

[blubushie]

(this got long, sorry. I DID say you couldnt stop me, significantly less sorry about that.)

Okay first of all, the characters are stupid thin. Yeah, its a stylized artstyle, I can get behind that, cool, Vivzie’s gimmick is that her designs are fun and bouncy and remind you of DeviantArt, good for her. But a gimmick shouldnt get in the way of quality! Not every character has to be stick-straight thin! Beelzebub is a character from Hazbin Hotel’s spinoff, Helluva Boss. One aspect of her character is that she’s extremely skinny due to her stomach being a lava pit. Except.. She doesnt looks skinnier than the other characters! Because they all look like they can fit a grand total of half their nervous systems in those scrawny torsos! AND more on Beelzebub, she lives in a hive, she’s referred to as a ‘Queen Bee’, theres a lot of bee/insect/honey/motifs about her… and she’s a wolf. A bee-wolf hybrid, sure, but functionally a wolf. The thing is, insect anthros exists, and they look good, and if you had any sense while running a show, you’d either ditch the heavy insect motifs or learn how to draw a damn anthro bee. Angel Dusts body is as thing as his arms and the other characters don’t fare much better. The buff characters have a bad case of ‘skipping leg day’ just so Vivzie can give THEM toothpick waists too. Give me Asmodeus with stomach fat or give me death. Actually, give me 75% of the characters with more body fat or give me death. I say 75% because the skinniness isnt an inherently bad thing, the whole show is stylized so its pointless talking about fat ratios. The problem is that ALL THE FUCKING CHARACTERS ARE BUILT LIKE THIS. Second of all, theyre way too overbearing. Take Husker. Cool design. Nice and simple. Digging the overalls-- oh god why does he have wings. Why does his tail look like that. I guarantee you if you take away the wings and give him a normal cat tail, his design would be good. But for some reason they keep on adding more details, more giant huge additions, more weird accessories that SCREAM “emo preteen who pathologizes their kinda strict parents”. Sir Pentious, now! Like that he’s a snake and remains legless. LIke the pinstripes. Aaand his hat has its own face. Why? It detracts from the character’s facial expressions because now you’re looking at his damn hat for the facial expression changes. At least the eyes on his hood are just tiny pupils, but his hat has a fucking mouth too! But even so, the eyes on his hood are still distracting, especially since Sir Pentious’ head is so small in comparison. Thirdly, SO MUCH GODDAMN RED HOLY SHIT. Cool it with the fucking red. Please. We get that its hell. We can tell because a character swears every other words and pulls the ‘>:D’ face every damn second. You dont need to make everything red. Please just fucking stop it. Its nothing but eyestrain and takes away from good character designs when so much of their colours are just black and different shades of red. Characters like Vox, who is mostly blue, was genuinely such a relief even though he still had some red because FINALLY something wasnt red or a light hue of red. Heres the kicker, that 50k video of Verbalase being chased by Charlie had better colour schemes than THE SHOW ITSELF. It was OKAY TO LOOK AT. The colours didnt give me a headache for once. None of the main cast’s designs work together. Husker looks like a cartoon character. Charlie looks like a “Sans’ Girlfriend” persona. Vaggie looks like a fantasy rpg character. Alastor looks like someone’s 2 edgy 4 u serial killer oc. And none of them work together. DOUBLE kicker, one character has a nose that isnt a pointy, anime girl, miniscule thing, its a hooked nose. And she’s themed after the 1920s. And she’s fat. And she likes money-- its a fucking jewish stereotype. 

You could make these designs so much better just by remedying ANY ONE of the points I made! Change the colours! Remove obstructive elements! Give them varied bodies! These designs only appeal to little kids cause theyre bright and move around a lot! But theyre functionally awful! There I said it. God.

Presented without comment (I have nothing to add cuz you said it all)

[sleepsacked]

all thanks to u (choi san) series update 2024

hi everyone~

idk how many of u all still have interest ? if at all, in my choi san series that i did back in 2022 (2.5 parts all thanks to you, because of you, all because of you) i jus wanted to say that im actually working on a 2024 revised/longer version of this so all the parts are combined and theres more filler story that i wanna get into between oc and san :3 as well as expand on the pt 3 that i initially had in the drafts back in 2022-2023

i am so sorry i havent updated in forever, i suck i know, but i definitely wanna get back into writing more on this page and i do have 2 other works in the making...

both were ateez but i think i might scrap one and make it ?? a svt/mingyu fic... ahhh much to think about

anyways i wanted to say that for this 2024 updated version of this series.. i wanted to give u guys a lot especially bc i did have such nice feedback and interaction on it when i had posted it !!

currently im at 15.5~16k words and im no where near finished with the story or editing... O___O

pls pls pls look forward to it im literally going to try and push it out sometime next week ?? im aiming for 20-25k which is probably the biggest fic ive ever . written . so pls <3 give feedback and if u wanna read the lil san series again head to my masterlist <3 ( i think i might have to fix the links so i am soososoosso sorry if it shows up weird omg)

okok that is all and i hope everyone is well mwa

[genderoutlaws]

(courage to present gnc anon) ty, tbh my main issue is the fear of reactions/backlash. i live in brazil, and while i dont live in the most homophobic/dangerous area, theres always the possibility of getting targeted. ig im also afraid of what my family will think, like id be crossing some unspoken boundary that will shatter the image they have of me of a sweet obedient straight girl, and therefore any respect that might have depended on that. not rlly sure where im going with this, Many Thoughts basically

aaa im sorry i just saw this part, but yeah that totally makes sense. i wish i had better advice :/ the reactions are the hardest part because its ultimately out of our control yknow. the reality of living like this is i’ve had people throw rocks at me before or yell slurs at me in the street (in san francisco no less). the reality is also getting the butch nod and being welcomed with love by strangers and feeling like i’m finally able to live a real authentic life. it’s both and it’s weird and it’s a lot.. many thoughts… if you ever wanna talk more feel free to reach out, and sorry if this wasn’t all that helpful, but i wanted u to know i saw the second msg and wish you the best of luck bud 😭♥️

edit: if u see this check the replies!! theres a fellow brazillian butch open to connecting with you :’) ♥️

[lex-the-lesbiann]

hmm do u have any particular scene or pose for future autumn/linda drawings im Scheming >:-3

@jayferins you’ve just made my entire week

okay this one is maybe a little weird ?? but picture this: a jar. and inside the jar? a comfy sitting spot. some flowers. maybe some vines. lotsa nature. some mugs with tea or coffee or hot chocolate in them. whos holding the mugs? Autumn and Linda. do you see it? theyre living a nice cozy life in the jar, Jay. it’s beautiful.

obligatory They Deserve A Goddamn Nap And Cuddles because holy fuck do they deserve a goddamn nap and cuddles

in an au where theyre together and are in contact with Henry and Ron, i think they would want to learn about their sons respective fields and interests so maybe a date to the San Dimas History Museum :]

i also like to think they’d be close with their grandsons, i think that Linda and Terry would get along well as would Autumn and the twins and honestly vice versa so i think they’d have pictures of them all around their house (not sure how much that counts as a prompt but yeah)

and for a pose theres this one panel with Harley Quinn and Posion Ivy that is just so adorable. I envision Autumn as Ivy (literally just bc plant magic, i am basic) but rlly it could be either way and this pose is just so cute and sweet

maybe them in front of and/or holding the lesbian pride flag? or the Pride pride flag? :3

I think Linda would want a cat but Autumn wouldn’t (idk she just doesnt seem like the type of person who would want to have a pet to me??)but they’d get a cat anyway with the understanding that its Lindas cat but bc i love tropes, the cat absolutely adores Autumn

I think Linda would name the cat Sprout maybe, honestly im open to name suggestions for the cat

I think that Autumn might take a lot of candid photos of Linda

Dancing! That is all

”She asked for no pickles” - Autumn

Maybe Linda braiding Autumns hair (and/or vice versa!)

Autumn wouldn’t want a pet but i think she definitely has a lot of plants and flowers and regularly gathers bouquets for Linda

oh Sprout (the cat) might eat Autumns plants a lot so they have beef (not really, just like the silly kind)

Them in suits or dresses, I can honestly see both of them wearing either

Them as the Barbie mugshot meme, i think Linda would be Barbie and Autumn would be Ken but i can also see it the other way so 🤷

a picture of them with that one news headline like “DOES KINK BELONG AT PRIDE? WE ASKED LGBT ELDERS AND THEY ASKED IF WE WERE COPS”

im so sorry this took so long, honestly i could still write more but i didn’t wanna make this like way too much lmao

and you obviously dont have to do all (or any!) of these, i do not expect that at all, these are just some ideas :3

[moncey-imagines]

WDW Trip Headcanons | Sans x GN!Reader

Sorry this took so long, Thanksgiving week has been quite busy 🥲 but now it is done and out for all the world to see 🐎🐎for context, the reader is hyperfixated on the disney parks (just like me 😎)

!!THIS HAS NOT BEEN PROOF-READ OR EDITED!!

enjoy!!!

Also I added an intro to lead into the headcanons 😱

It started with a simple statement:

* WHAT?? SERIOUSLY???

* seriously.

This is the first time you found out that Sans had absolutely no idea about the pure magic and majesty of Disney parks.

* You've been on the surface for like a year...how do you STILL not know about Disneyworld...

* idk

* Do you even know about the Disney company at all??? You have to, they are industry giants in like every category of anything ever...

* i think so, are they the ones that have the princesses?

* Which princesses?

* you know, the ones.

* No I don't, you have to tell me which ones.

* the ones with the hair.

* WHAT KIND OF HAIR?

* long hair i think.

* Rapunzel?

* idk

* Okay yeah that's it, we're going to Disneyworld, lemme go book the flights.

* cool

Two weeks later, you and your skeleton boyfriend were off to Orlando so you could expose him to the wonders of Walt Disney World.

Once you two are there and walking around, he'd probably be more focused on you rather than the park. I mean, it's kind of hard to ignore how excited you get over being in the park. The amount of facts that pop up in your brain the second you're in the parks is abundant, so much so that there is no way to stop you excited rambling (not that he'd try, he thinks it's cute).

* Look!! Look at the windows!!

* im lookin.

* It's a tribute to Marc Davis!!

* i...sorry, i dont know who that is.

Expect a lot of Sans not understanding a single thing you're talking about.

* Sans!! Look at the rocks, it's shaped like the Nautilus!!

* yeah?

* Yeah!! That's cause 20000 Leagues Under the Sea was here before The Little Mermaid ride!!

* wow.

* Do you know what any of what I just said means?

* um...not really no, im sorry.

He'll still listen though, he likes seeing you happy and excited.

* i really don't think these guys have the guts to be in here naked

* They're fake skeletons, Sans, but there's a rumor that the skull on the bed in Disneyland if re- wait...they don't have the guts. I just got it.

* took you a minute huh.

* Shut it, bonehead.

* sorry, but a name like that won't get under my skin.

* These jokes suck, you must have left your funny bone at home.

* i know, im just a lazy bones like that.

Everyone around you two have to occasionally either sit through agonizingly horrible jokes or get up and walk away.

* Hey, Sans! Do you think you can solve the murder mystery?

* murder mystery? isnt that a little dark for magic kingdom?

* It's not too dark for the Haunted Mansion, that's what this ride is all about.

* ah, okay. i wont let it rattle my bones then.

* You're such a doofus.

* actually, in your own words, im a bonehead.

* Do you think you can do the puzzle or not? The lines gonna move...

* yeah, yeah, okay.

Sans also seems to really like standing in line to hear what other people are saying.

* people say some wild stuff here, (y/n).

* Like what?

* i just heard a little girl ask her mom what happened to Mickey Mouse when he went backstage and her older sister said that the staff skinned him.

* Oh my god.

* thats not all, after that her mom agreed and told her thats how they make the Mickey ear hats.

* these fireworks are pretty nice.

* Did you know that they have to set them off no matter what? For safety reasons, they can't let old fireworks sit back there unused, even is they cancel the shows.

* so theres technically always a show?

* ...I guess so, yeah.

* ...

* What do you think happens if an airplane flies to close to the fire works?

* what happens?

* It probably becomes a scareplane.

* that one's a stretch

* C'mon, I thought it was funny.

* you were close, but not close enough. maybe next time.

Driving the car to the hotel, you turn to Sans.

* Did you...like today's trip? I wasn't annoying was I?

* i liked it, yeah, and not at all, i thought all your little facts were great. im excited for what you tell me tommorow.

* Alright, I'll stock up on my facts for Animal Kingdom tomorrow.

* you better, ill even polish my humerus.

* I knew you were gonna make some kind of pun, I felt it in my bones.

* what, have you been spine on me?

* Okay, that one was knee-t.

Sans lets out a sigh.

* What's wrong?

* nothing at all, i love you.

I'M SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG AAAAA

also sorry if its more dialogue than headcanons, I've been coding VNs as of late DHFYSGADFh

I kinda wanna make this into a short visual novel...but I cannot at the moment, I must get this fic out DHGFIYFSG

I hope it was good, if anyone wants a part two in another part just send in an ask 😎

[d3df1zh]

HIIIII!!! my name is clover and this is my intro post. i WOULD make an about page but i really don't want to bc im lazy keep reading if u wanna know thingz abt me bc this will take a while trust

okay so, i go by he/she/they. I am a minor and i don't know if i'll post a lot but i got some heavy fandom opinions i might share bc i get kind of passionately rage-filled at some things.

i'm also aroace!! interests!!! ☆ there's a lot so be warned

any colored, bold interests are ones im REALLY into so you dont get bored reading - if you havent gotten bored already

only bold interests are ones i adore but aren't fixating on at the moment my interests are ANYTHING cuphead related (casino cups, etc.), gravity falls, splatoon, idv (i dont play the game bc i suck but i love the lore + chars), undertale/verse, HORRORTALE ESPECIALLY, silent hill, rdr2, resident evil, lego monkie kid, jttw, any mythology really, scott pilgrim, heathers, coroika.. kind of?, tmnt (2012 & 1987), white day; a labyrinth named school, the path (videogame), sonic, FNAF, madoka magica, serial experiments lain, MY OCS!!! (I HAVE DOCS ON ALMOST ALL OF THEM PLEASE ASK ABOUT THEM!!!!), um jammer lammy, hollow knight, fictional horror, PETSCOP, luna game, cookie run kingdom, REGRETEVATOR!!

i have more interests but they're more minute so its unnecessary to name ALL of them also theres already a fuck ton of text soooo ! oh i also like making my own versions of aus (especially problematic ones or poorly written ones (ofc im not bullying any creators of aus by saying them and their creativity sucks, they don't suck, but some popular aus are just..... ugeeeeehhh. also some creators are bad people so they kind of deserve it. I just want to make a better space for fans of said aus.)) byf ☆

i am anti-sanscest, i find it weird, im sorry

i really do try not to be super mean in a rant/opinion but i will be passionate and stern about it

i am somewhat a spicynoodles anti? i just don't like it, im sorry ^same with purecacao

i make sexual jokes sometimes, not very often in public though

i block whatever and whomever i want /lh

i dog on mischaracterizations of my favs a LOT (or just mischaracterizations of any character) (staring at you 'horror' sans fans) (i'll made a small rant on my main abt the mischaracterization of horrortale sans and i'll do it again. it'll be on my queue and be way firmer stg!!)

if i accidentally interact while im on ur dni list, PLEASE feel free to block me! I like posts mindlessly so I don't often check dni lists unless i want to follow someone!

dni ☆

basic criteria, vivziepop supporters, hazbin hotel/helluva fans, dsmp/qsmp fans, zionists/pro-israel mfs, pro/comshippers, whitewashers or ppl who think blackwashing is real, i think thats it just don't be weird

that might be it, i'll freely edit this if i want to make any changes!! :3 hope i can make some quality content (i will not)