#these past few months also ultimately helped me realize what i want to do with my life

[harleehazbinfics]

Mine, all mine.

a lucifer x reader fanfiction.

inspired by this ask: link

wc: 1728

warning: suggestive themes!!

a/n: sometimes i wish i could just give the program my brain and let it write itself. my ass is not suited for writing at extensive periods of time in one sitting.

You were a sinner, made to rot in hell for all of eternity until exorcist end your miserable souls. However, you refused to lead that fate. You disliked how other demons would underestimate you just because of how weak and fragile you looked, especially with your wings. So, you improvised, you took this to your advantage, eventually one-by-one overlords toppled over from your powers, becoming your servants or souls you feasted on. You never sought to purge sinners or become an overlord in the process for that matter, it was just that you heavily disliked being underestimated by these narcissistic souls, that you couldn’t help but put them in their place.

After decades of doing the same thing over and over again, you decided you wanted something different to do, other than manipulating and devouring retched souls all the time. With Alastor’s recommendation, you find yourself in Hell’s Hazbin Hotel, a hotel that aims to rehabilitate sinners and help them go to heaven. You didn’t oppose to the idea and if there would be sinners that find this their calling, then you’d like to support them in their endeavors, unlike your pal Alastor. Besides, it would be a free meal if some jackass just wanted to stir up some trouble with both of you around.

So, that’s what you led you here to this moment.

“—and this is (y/n), our other host, they’ve been helping with the hotel just a few months ago, despite being a busy overlord and all,” Charlie introduces you to each other.

“It’s a pleasure to meet the King of Hell himself. How do you do, my lord?” you greet with a polite smile after dipping your head in acknowledgement.

However, everything flew past Lucifer’s head when he saw your figure. You had a pleasant aura with an angelic face paired with bright beautiful wings that had him thrown in a loop. You had a kind and gentle gaze, lips a luscious shade of pink and cheeks full of life. You were simply ethereal—you didn’t look like you were from hell. You perfectly fit the standard for heaven’s angels and their winners.

“Uhh, dad?”

“Yeah, huh?!” Lucifer startles awake from his daydreaming and pays attention to his daughter. Finally realizing he was on a balcony with Charlie and Vaggie, a long way from where he was lost in thought.

“So, what do you think?” Charlie asks expectantly holding her hands together.

“Uh, yeah yeah. They look great. Say, who was that little friend you had there down there, are they also an angel?” he asks straightforwardly with a finnicky undertone.

“What? (Y/n)? No, they’re an overlord here in hell and our host. Didn’t I already say that?” Charlie replied starting to get annoyed with her dad.

“Oh, I see. They were just very beautiful looking, especially with those wings. I almost certainly thought they were an angel,” he rambles.

Vaggie and Charlie look at Lucifer stunned as Charlie starts, “What? Are you--? No, wait, dad we’re getting sidetracked. I meant the hotel! What do you think of it?!”

Then Lucifer goes on a tangent on how sinners could never be redeemed, and that they were vicious people who misused the gift that he gave them leading them here in hell. Before Charlie could fully give on getting her cause across to her father, a crash interrupts them.

They teleport downstairs and see a bunch of loan sharks barging their way into the hotel.

“Everyone! Get somewhere safe! I’ll handle this,” Vaggie yells readying her spear.

“No, my dear, leave it to me. It's time I remind everyone why I am here,” Alastor announces transforming into his demon form.

You chuckle unfurling your wings flying close to him, “Don’t forget about me.”

Lucifer ultimately shuts his mouth as he watches you dive headfirst towards one of the sharks stretching your hand out to grab their faces. You slam him roughly on the ground as his strength drains from his body. The longer you placed your hand on him the more his body crumples and dries, slowly wilting away from your touch. Leaving behind a red pulsing orb, you unhinge your jaw wrapping your tongue around it before swallowing it whole.

Lucifer’s stomach drops to his feet from the realization of his misconception of you, but he undoubtedly receives a hard-on as he can’t help but sexualize your actions. Wondering how it would feel wrapped around your long tongue and enveloped by your lips as you swallowed all of him.

He smacks himself across the face to rid himself of his thoughts and fixes his eyes on you and Alastor finishing up your massacre and dusting yourselves off. As he sees you both banter playfully, he couldn’t help but be reminded of his irritation for the male and comment towards Charlie.

“Mhm, you see? What'd I tell you? Charlie, sinners are violent psychopaths, hell bent on causing as much pain and destruction as they can. There's really no point in trying.”

She angrily huffs and yells at him, “Dad! Stop! He's defending this hotel! It may be a bit more sadistic than I'd hoped, but he's doing it for me! How come he can have faith in me, but my own father can't?”

His face crumples as he realizes his mistake. Here was his daughter trying to realize her dreams but couldn’t even support her ideas and aspirations. He was no better than those elders that shunned him away for his dreams. He finally comes clean to Charlie and apologizes to her. Finally supporting her dream and agreed on setting up the meeting for her.

But before he teleports away, he glances at you which you only responded with a light smile and nodded your head at him appreciating his help. He couldn’t help but be expectant of the next time you’ll meet again. He wished that Charlie would give him a call again soon.

The next time you met was when the angels attacked the residents of the hotel. When the matter was settled, all of you—including the help you gathered from Cannibal Town, celebrated your win in the now more spacious hotel.

While the lot of them gathered sharing drinks on one side, he saw you by yourself on the other side. He stands next to you with a grin, tapping your shoulder and asks, “This seat taken?”

You get startled from his action unfamiliar with people touching you so casually and give a flustered answer, “N-no! Please have a seat.”

He chuckles as he sits next to you, noticing how you scooted a little further away from him. He feels saddened when he was trying to be close to you, but you pull yourself away from him. He couldn’t help but comment, “You don’t need to be so distant. I’m just trying to get to know you better.”

You give him a smile and wrap your hands around your drink before answering, “Sorry. I’m just not used to people trying to come close to me at this distance, with my powers and all.”

He tilts his head cutely making you giggle and continue, “I guess Charlie didn’t tell you. I have the powers to drain demon’s powers. The longer I touch ‘em they die, and their soul becomes mine.”

He lets out a sound of understanding and mutters, “So that’s what that was.”

You look at him with you chin on your hand on the counter looking at him in interest. “Have you been watching me, your majesty?” you couldn’t help but tease.

You were not disappointed as you watch his face turn red as he fumbled with his drink while he tries to reply, “W-well, I couldn’t help but admire how strong you were. Either in a fight or just casually talking to you, you just seem to be so confident that I can’t help but keep my eyes on you.”

“You’re beautiful,” he finishes with a dreamy sigh.

“Are you hitting on me?” you ask complemented with a seductive smile.

His breath hitches as he realizes what he did, as he panics trying to save himself, “I mean! Please don’t take this the wrong way! I was just admiring— whoops!”

He accidentally drops his drink in his flustered state, with both of your fast reflexes you caught the glass together. His hand covering yours, he tilts his head not noticing anything different with himself as he holds you.

Meanwhile, you hastily place the cup down on the counter and fretted over him, “Are you alright? Are you unwell anywhere?”

“No, I’m fine. I don’t feel much different actually,” he says looking at his hands.

You sigh in relief not expecting this man to throw you off your loop. You’re so composed all the time that having this man in your proximity just destroys your braincells with how cute and charming he was.

“Actually, can we do that again?” he asks with a serious look, to which you hesitantly accepted locking your hands together for a while. As time passes on without much progress to his experiment, the more your cheeks turn into a bright shade of red that he finally catches on to.

“What’s go you so flustered all of a sudden, angel?” he teases squeezing your hand a few times egging you on.

You cover your cheeks with your other hand and tightly held his hand to make him stop, “I’ve never held hands with someone before.”

He smirks inching closer to your face, feeling his breath on you as he tried to memorize every part of you with half-lidded eyes, “Never been this close with a handsome bloke before?”

You stand from your seat, evidently towering over him from the sheer height difference then caging him in his both of his hands above him as you pinned him to a wall behind him.

“Never. Would you like to change that?” you whispered by his ear, earning a shudder from him.

“Bet,” he grins letting his forked tongue slither out of his mouth introducing itself to you while letting himself loose and held your waist. “Let’s go somewhere quiet.”

As the two of you disappeared from the group’s sights, Angel drunkenly yells, “OH, SHIT! LUCIFER’S GETTING SOME ASS TONIGHT!”

“Ewwww,” Charlie cries in disgust not welcoming the thought of his father fucking someone in her brain.

[dc418writes]

•Daddy Dare Care•

✨Pairing✨: mechanic!Ari Levinsonxblack!reader

Summary🪄 : Ari’s bright idea to stay with the girls to give you a break may not go as smoothly as he thought (Operation: Rekindle addition)

⚠️: dad!Ari (truly a menace Lol), all fluff💕

A/N🎙️: Just something short and sweet. It started out a bit self indulgent since it was my birthday on April 18th☺️, but since that has definitely passed and it switched to Mother’s Day (which also has since passed🫠 lol). Either way, we now have a change in celebrations! Hope you guys like it! *If I can push myself, I have 2 other belated bday/self indulgent fics I want to put out but we’ll see!*

*DISCLAIMER!*: Although collage was made by me, I DO NOT CLAIM OWNERSHIP of any pictures used as they were all found on Pinterest

“Ari, you sure you’re gonna be okay?,” you ask in a hushed whisper daring not to wake your sleeping twins. As angelic as they looked at this moment in their matching bassinets, long lashes resting peacefully against their cheeks, you wouldn’t believe they were screaming like mad men an hour before.

Aliana was hungry, but wouldn’t take your breast milk from the bottle her father so nicely warmed for her. She wanted it from the source, which wouldn’t have been an issue if her sister Brynn wasn’t so keen on staying attached to you today.

So unsurprisingly, she wasn’t happy when you and Ari had to trade.

And sensing her sister wasn’t happy, Aliana therefore would not feed and instead cried in solidarity with her sister.

Like she’s done pretty much every other day since you’ve moved in, Mrs. Holloway shuffled her way across the hall knocking on your door to check on your little family and make sure everything was fine after over 15 minutes of wailing. Although a very sweet gesture, you really weren’t in the mood for her “what I used to do is…” at that current moment.

“I probably shouldn’t even be-,”

“Y/N it’s Mother’s Day. You deserve to get out the house and have a break,” Ari responds. “Go and have fun, we’ll be good.”

You honestly felt guilty how much you longed for more than the monotonous cycle that was your life these past months. Not a complete change, just a little twist in the routine if you will

Seeing your friends going out for dinner and on trips made you miss your college days of exploring the city or those around. Not caring about what time you came back because you only had yourself to worry about.

Yes you knew you needed a break - your doctor and the girls’ pediatrician always emphasized that during your respective appointments - but you honestly felt like you didn’t deserve it. As your mother said when you announced your pregnancy, “Say goodbye to whatever you consider fun and the life you had before. It’s now solely about those two until they’re good and grown. Heck even past that really.”

By the time you realize you’re crying, Ari’s already wiping away the lone tear with his thumb sweetly smiling at you as he caresses your cheeks.

“Baby I know it’s hard, but this is good for you. It’s okay to have a life outside of our girls.”

“Is it though?,” you whisper. “What if 20 or so years from now they need therapy because I wasn’t there?”

“…Well seeing that they’re infants, I doubt they’ll even remember this,” Ari lightly chuckles successfully making you smile - even if for only a few seconds. “Plus it’s only a few hours sweetheart. It’s not like you’re leaving for good. At least I hope not.”

His feigned suspicion and playful, narrowed eyes make you giggle as you lightly shake your head. “I’ll admit that was a bit dramatic.”

“But it’s just you being a concerned mama, which I understand.”

There he was being that grounding force you always needed. Helping quiet the noise from your brain to bring you a step closer to peace.

His warm palms still on your cheeks as you gazed into his eyes, you were happy to have him back - unfortunately only just for a short amount of time.

Ultimately, he was your center and from his absence you learned without him everything was off.

Unknown to you, he felt the same way of your presence. During your time apart, he honestly thought he wouldn’t make it how his body seemed to crave more than your touch. To hear your footsteps coming down the hall. Feel you under the same roof even if you weren’t in the same room.

Your buzzing phone signals your best friend’s arrival outside making you both separate - and further miss having such an intimate moment with each other again.

“If you need anything please call. Don’t try to struggle through so I don’t worry.”

“I will.” Ari’s hands on your hip and lower back gently move you towards the door not giving you a chance to possibly change your mind. “And you try to have fun. I don’t even want you thinking about us until you get back. Okay?”

“Kay,” you sigh stealing one last look at your beautiful girls. “I’ll see you guys later.”

“Just be sure to call when you’re on the way so we can kick everyone out and have everything cleaned up from the party.”

“Very funny.” His lips on your forehead smooth away your worry lines; instead replacing them with a flush of heat and a soft smile.

Instinctively, he wanted to lean down and meet your lips as well but he somehow restrains himself. Flashing his adorable tilted smile as a last assurance everything would be fine before you’re out the door walking down the steps to your friend’s Lexus. After a final wave, you’re both gone and he’s left with the quiet apartment and two sleeping babies.

Definitely not secretly worried himself as he sits on the couch with both bassinets in front of him. His girls and the tv in perfect view.

“Alright ladies, looks like it’s just us,” he quietly speaks to no one in particular. “So far so good right? Yea I think so too.”

As if sensing her father’s anxiety and mother’s absence, Brynn begins to wiggle and whimper as she typically did before having a full fussy meltdown. Luckily he’s able to get her before she could wake up Ali. Gently holding her close to his chest as he slowly rocks back and forth quietly shushing her.

“Hey it’s okay, I’m here babygirl. Nothing to worry about we’re alright.” In a matter of seconds she’s back to sleep and Ari’s smiling to himself comfortably sitting back against the soft, decorative pillows.

What was he nervous for? He had everything completely under control and these next few hours would easily fly by.

Or so he thought.

~

A couple hours later and his little angels were wide awake loudly broadcasting their requests for new diapers through their tears.

“I know sweetheart, I know. Daddy only has two hands though, so he’s working as fast as he can,” he responds in a sing-song tone to Aliana using one hand to try and tickle her cries away while the other steadies her squirmy sister.

He never really realized how long this takes not having any help.

Now they sat, relatively calm, in their high chairs watching as Ari opened their containers of food to place on the small plates in front of them.

“Okay my loves, dinner is served.”

With a fist full of smushed peas and carrots, the nine-month olds each inspect their hands before deciding they’d rather not.

“What’s wrong? You guys love this.”

Brynn just smashes more veggies between her fingers while Ali fiddles with the side of her chair as if trying to let herself down.

“Cmon girls you gotta eat,” Ari states grabbing two plastic spoons in each hand. Expertly, he’s able to get something on each one before holding it up to the twin’s mouths. Ali whines moving her head away, and Brynn smacks the utensil from his hand finding it quite hilarious when it drops to the floor.

“Alright, if you don’t want that let’s try this then.”

With the clean spoon, he digs into the clear baby food container before holding the yellowish goop to Brynn’s lips letting her taste. Smacking her lips once, her face contorts in disgust as she holds her tongue out not wanting anymore of whatever that was.

Ali does the same with the addition of smearing the remaining food from her lips to her cheeks and nose.

“It’s chicken and rice guys, I know it can’t be that bad. Here, watch dada.”

Getting a healthy spoonful for himself, he quickly realizes that probably wasn’t the best idea once it settles into his tastebuds.

Whatever this was definitely did not taste like the chicken and rice he was used to. And why did it almost taste like medicine?

He’s quick to spit it back into the jar gagging and frantically searching for a napkin to wipe the remaining residue from his tongue. His two angels giggling the entire time enjoying the impromptu show from their father.

“Glad my pain could make you laugh,” he shakes his head sliding the terrible chicken and rice to the side so he’d remember to throw it away later - and any other food from that brand.

Sighing, he journeys back to the fridge wondering what could work for his extremely picky girls as his oceanic blues scan along the shelves.

“Well since those two were a no, maybe we’ll have better luck with this.”

He takes one small container of strawberry yogurt and scoops the pink substance on one mini placemat before taking another to do the same on the next.

Just as they did with the peas, the yogurt oozes between their fingers then is brought to their mouths where they seem to enjoy the cold treat.

They reach for more practically sticking their entire hands in their mouths trying to eat as much as they could. He even hears a “mm” come from Brynn while Ali gnaws on both hands with that adorable dimpled smile.

“You like it girls?,” Ari asks chuckling at his messy little ones who’d definitely need a bath when they were done. “Don’t worry we got plenty more.”

~

Returning to your apartment, you’re a bit nervous as to what you’d find on the other side of the door not hearing anything from Ari since you left.

Everything seems okay though, seeing the pristine kitchen and dishes drying on the pad next to the sink.

As you step further into the living room, the only noise is some colorful cartoon character running across the tv screen while Ari snoozes with his head on the couch’s armrest. He must really be exhausted how his mouth is parted letting his snores freely escape to the open air. There’s even a bit of drool glistening in the corner of his mouth.

And you’d still gladly give him another child if he asked.

Perching on the edge of the cushion, you turn to run your thumb over his thick brow while gently calling out his name until he’s shifting and mumbling. “Ari, I’m back.”

One eye squinted, he tiredly smiles as he stretches his limbs - and you try to hold yourself together watching his muscles flex under the black Nirvana graphic tee. You shyly turn away, busying yourself with one of the girl’s rattles once his tummy pokes out along with a bit of his happy trail.

“Back already?,” he asks with a yawn.

“Ari it’s almost eight,” you softly chuckle as he looks towards the window to find it completely dark outside. A short “hm” rumbling in his chest as he sits up.

“I was out longer than I thought then.”

“How was everything? Were they fussy when I left?”

“It was good,” he smiles instantly making your own form. “And no, they actually stayed asleep for a couple hours before they woke up. Then had diaper changes, ate, and played until they got tired. Before you ask, yes I took plenty of pictures.”

He chuckles at the way you giddily bounce as he hands his phone over. The screen already showing a photo of your babies with messy faces and hands as they ate their yogurt. How did they always manage to get it in their hair?

“How was your girl’s day?”

“Pretty good. We went to that new little area, Midtown. They have some cute shops and things so we stayed there, talked and ate.”

“And see? Everyone’s fine, no one in any emotional distress,” he adds nudging your side and making you roll your eyes.

“I know I know, the world didn’t end,” you giggle standing as you hand his phone back - trying to ignore those fuzzy feelings in your stomach for the second time today when his hand touches yours. “I’m uh gonna go peek in on them before getting ready for bed.”

“Okay, just uh let me know when your done so I can change and everything.”

It’s been months, and it’s still taking time for both of you to get used to the new arrangements of your “separation”. At least once a day Ari had to remind himself how it was your bedroom now. How he was basically the guest in your home.

You, on the other hand, would never get used to the cold bed though having had your own personal heater for years.

Secretly, you didn’t wash the pillowcase from his side for the longest not wanting to get rid of his smell. The last remnant of his former presence in your little apartment.

Nodding your head, your sandals dully flap against the carpet as you make your way to your girls. More than ready to attack those chubby cheeks with kisses and nibble on fingers/toes if you could. However stepping foot in the door, that excitement soon turns into dread.

“Um Ari,” you sweetly call over your shoulder, “come here please.”

In seconds, he’s by your side still yawning the residual sleep from his body.

“What’s-,” his words catch in his throat as the horrendous scent finally touches his nostrils. “What died?!”

In their crib, Brynn and Aliana sat quietly covered in green, pasty poop that seemed to have run from their diapers out onto their starry mattress cover.

More specifically, Brynn sat squeezing poop in her fists while Ali lied on her back staring at the ceiling as if saying, “why me?”

“Exactly how much yogurt did you give them?”

“…Two.”

“Two?!”

“A-and a half,” he adds nervously scratching the back of his neck.

“Ari!,” you whine with hands on your hips. “The girls don’t do well with lots of dairy or sugar. It’s why we have the ‘only one’ limit.”

“But they really liked it! You should’ve seen how cute they were doing that excited shake thing. Plus they wouldn’t eat anything else I tried to give them,” he explains hoping to make it to the twins first birthday.

Sighing, you kick off your shoes before leaning down to pick up Ali being careful to not get any feces on you. “Let’s get you cleaned up my love. Can you get B please?”

Hesitantly, Ari reaches over the wooden railing to get his daughter trying to control his gags as she joyfully reaches out wanting to be held closer. “Please tell me you didn’t try to eat it.”

~

“Sorry I messed up,” Ari whispers as the four of you lie in bed. The girls, now freshly cleaned and in new onesies, each on their stomachs gently breathing. “Now you’re never gonna want to leave again.”

“It’s okay Ari, it was an accident. Need I remind you of the trip to your mom’s?,” you both chuckle.

“I just don’t want you worrying every time you step out the door.”

“That’s gonna happen no matter what. I love you guys and don’t want anything to happen.”

That innocent admission had a bright gleam forming in Ari’s eyes and a warmth blooming over his body. He tried ducking his face deeper into the pillow, but that smile was hard to hide.

“Thank you for everything today. I feel like I don’t say it much, but I appreciate all you do for us.”

Luckily his blush was easier to conceal from how dim the room was. “Anything for my girls.”

[demonqueenart]

hi! first of all, i'm so sorry you're feeling the way that you are. you've helped open my eyes to things i admittedly didn't know (dan's comment at wad, for example) or didn't notice. i'm glad you're receiving at least some support from other phans! i don't know if this helps at all (and it's not me trying to excuse dan), but i wanted to add some context to his "third-world country" reference. as an american, i can tell you that we grew up learning "this"third world" as the proper term. most of my colleagues, friends, family members, etc. STILL use it casually to refer to developing nations/the global south - we were literally taught to use it in school. of course it has since become obsolete, as the wording is incredibly offensive. i know about this because of my time in academia, but this awareness hasn't at all spread to the general population (especially in dan's/my generation of millennials and older). as smart as i do think dan is, i wonder if that's also the case in england. he has the responsibility to educate and inform himself and he needs to acknowledge that he's hurt and alienated a large proportion of his fanbase, so i still hope he'll do that soon.

as for the tour, one of my my best friends is mexican (and lives in mexico) and she was really disappointed during ii when they had to cancel the announced mexico dates. they had assumed the dates would work out, but - if i remember correctly - were presented with a lot of visa/permissions issues. they tried to make it work but it didn't, and they waited much too long to tell anyone. my guess is that they wanted to avoid a similar disappointment this time and not give anyone false hope, nor accidentally say anything negative about those countries as they explain their reasoning (which, of course, just comes off worse - ignoring is never the issue).

other artists have had similar issues with asian and middle eastern countries as well, as there is increased censorship and visa requirements. i've spent four years of my life in asian countries (and a few months in south america) and know that there are phans there who'd love to see them, but it might not be feasible.

ultimately, however, dan and phil owe everyone transparency and need to acknowledge if they're having difficulties with bookings in other countries and why. they usually go back and add dates later, so fingers crossed that they're trying to work out some dates in latam and may yet still add them.

It’s the lack of transparency that is the issue here. How am I supposed to trust them when they won’t tell me anything in the first place? And if they expect me to assume for the best, I don’t think I can do that. Not with all the time they tried to bury their mistakes when people have been hurt as if it’s nothing. I’m sorry but if they’re choosing to look good in the public eye before choosing us, then I don’t think I can trust them anymore. And it’s not that they’ll look bad when they’re talking about this stuff, but the fact they have never once talked about it ever really makes it feel like they want to keep this shut. And that hurts a lot.

Thank you for your perspective tho. I think it helps seeing where they can possibly come from.

Auto-message: This ask’s purpose is to acknowledge dnp’s past/present exclusivity, not to cancel them! But to embrace mistakes that they’ve made so that 1. we won’t exclude people in need in this community, and 2. we can normalize bringing up exclusivity so that improvement can happen. Hopefully this will one day help dnp realize that this is a safe space for them to talk about their mistakes, so that this space can become safe for people of all kinds too <3

*If you don’t understand what is happening, scroll through my blog for context. And I’ll be taking time to answer my asks, so don’t think I’m ignoring youuu*

[ao3-oner]

Update/Announcement on the We Keep Falling Apart Series + My Intended Worlds Sequel to Mad Scientist Incorrigible

Hi everyone! Thanks for stopping by.

As you may have heard, I have decided that I will no longer be writing a sequel for Mad Scientist Incorrigible during Worlds this year despite planning to do so for the past few months. I want to assure you that this decision did not come without series deliberation and perhaps an undue amount of anguish. With that said, if you're interested, I'll explain at least a handful of the reasons that I have decided not to write this fic:

I don't want the fic to feel contrived

For context, when I first started drafting this Worlds fic way back in May, I felt confident that JDG would make Worlds and I would be able to continue the series in the way that I wanted to. It wasn't until the LPL summer split started that I realized I shouldn't have taken as much for granted, and I started drafting my back-up fic just in case. No matter how you try to spin it, a sequel to MSI set in a universe where JDG doesn't make Worlds is a work-around, an exercize in "things didn't turn out how I wanted, but let's try to patch things up anyway". I feel like, with the narrative I set up, in this universe, I cannot properly address and resolve the conflicts that I set into motion in MSI while still paying proper respect to all the characters. This was the thing I was most worried about when drafting my back-up Worlds fic: that narrative elements would come across as forced or contrived and the characters would not seem genuine.

2. I am still mourning the loss of what the fic could have been

As implied, it was always the case that the fic I really *wanted* to write was the version in which JDG makes Worlds. If I were to write an alternate version of that fic, it would lack some of the moments that I've been brainrotting about for months, the scenes that I've been wanting to bring to you. It would just feel bad to be constantly reminded of what we're all missing out on, of what could have been. That was just one reason why it was absolutely soul-crushing for me to watch JDG get one game away from making it only to face defeat: that match was absolutely brutal, too, consisting of Ruler being head-and-shoulders above everyone else on both teams, but still losing only because his teammates (not Kanavi - we love you Kanavi and seeing him take on supporting champs rather than carries to help Ruler was inspirational) were playing insultingly poorly and he could only carry them so far. I wish I was exaggerating. I'm not. Ruler deserved to make Worlds - he deserved this fic. However, with things playing out how they did, I'm afraid I can't give it to him.

(Side note: one consideration I had was "If you like the fic idea where Ruler makes Worlds so much, then just write it anyway." I've considered this, but ultimately decided against it because it feels dishonest to what I've set up the WKFA series to be - fics that are grounded in what actually happened, also because of the next reason:)

3. Irl Ruler and Lehends have actually gotten their shit together???

This is the one reason on this list that is actually somewhat positive lmao - but yeah, if you haven't been following, ever since MSI, Ruler and Lehends have actually been pretty vocal about talking to each other. They both really wanted to meet at Worlds, Lehends said that he'd be interested in potentially playing with Ruler again in the future, and overall, they've just been very sweet. With all that going on, launching into an angsty narrative that starts out primarily vihends seems kind of silly to me. I'd feel overdramatic for writing something like that, and Idk, I've probably always been overdramatic, but I feel like it's much more apparent now. So, good for them! I hope they play together again soon <3

4. The fic would take a LOT of my time when I have other fics that I'm more excited to work on

It should come as a surprise to no one that writing longer multi-chapter fics is a significant time investment, and unfortunately, as I am a working person who also has other commitments and hobbies, I do not have an infinite amount of time to spend on writing LoLRPF. With that said, if I were to commit to writing a Worlds fic, that would consume nearly all of my LoLRPF time for the next two months. In that same amount of time, I could write a number of other fun fics, including more RuLehends - angsty, smutty, and/or otherwise - that I would actually enjoy writing. I was happy to delay all my other fics for the change to construct my grand narrative with JDG at Worlds, but now that we're stuck dealing with the knockoff, I feel like my time would be better and more pleasantly spent working on other projects.

5. I don't want to write the fic!

For all the reasons listed above and any number of less articulate ones, I have come to the conclusion as the writer that I do not feel like continuing this series. That, in and of itself, is justification enough not to, with no other explanation necessary.

I hope that clears up some of the questions/comments/thoughts you may have, but if you want to hear more, then please don't hesitate to DM me or shoot message to my inbox. I am also happy to share some of my thoughts about what the Worlds fic could have been, and I might even be convinced to share some snippets of scenes that I pre-wrote during my brainrot over the past few months.

With that established, I am officially marking 8 Seconds to Base as the last entry in the "We Keep Falling Apart" series and marking the series as completed.

I understand how disappointing it is to get excited for a fic or series only for it to get discontinued, so I apologize. Life happens. Unfortunately, my hype for this year's Worlds is almost entirely dead now. I'll take care of myself, though, and hope that you all do the same.

Thanks for reading, and have a great day <4

[raayllum]

For the commentary meme:

“I know sibling relationships can be complicated,” Soren meandered, pulling at his collar when Ez didn’t directly look at him. “But I’ve known you and Callum a long time, your whole lives in fact, and—”

“The world won’t end if my brother and I don’t talk to each other for a week,” Ezran said irritably. Callum might've been able to forget about the past oh so easily, but Ezran couldn't.

“No,” Soren agreed, soft and wise. “But you might regret it.”

It had been only with a day’s notice, after all, before their father had been taken abruptly from him. Only a few weeks before Claudia had garnered white hair and a staff and Soren hadn’t seen her for two years. Maybe it would be best to… even if Ezran was angry, and even if he wouldn’t renounce his choice not to help, he and Callum could still…

It was late that night, four days after their fight, that Ezran went up to his room with the intent on trying to hash something out in the morning if his temper didn’t get the better of him again.

There was a letter and the assassin’s bow lying on his bed.

Ezran, the letter read, his shaking hands nearly tearing it two before his eyes could focus on the word. Callum’s handwriting. We figured out the location of the Starscraper and we left a few hours ago. Maybe the time away will help. Help change his mind, surely, was the unwritten intent. Look after the prison while we’re gone. It shouldn’t be more than a month at most. Stay safe.

And then a blank space where I love you should’ve gone, a half formed letter like that was all Callum had been able to bring himself to manage.

Below that was slimmer, messier writing. Rayla.

Ez,

I’m sorry this is the way things have gone. I hope we can make it right once Callum and I have come back. I know this is difficult and I’m sorry… I’m so sorry for my part in it. I left behind Runaan’s bow as an apology; it’s yours to do what you want with. He won’t need it anymore. I’m sorry, again. I promise I’ll keep Callum safe while we’re gone.

All my love, Rayla

A tear smudged the ink before Ezran set the letter down and wiped at his face. The bow loomed over the cushions, blue against red.

He wasn’t sure why he was crying when he wanted to scream instead.

want commentary on a scene from one of my fics? send me the passage and i'll write up some meta/thought process stuff

Ah the ending of chapter 4 / where the brothers have left off until further notice!

This scene was really important to me to get right since it is that Great Schism for the brothers, ultimately. I thought it was very Ezran for him to still sort of think things could turn out if he just puts in the effort / has another conversation (he's angry and grieving, but he's not Bitter before this as much), only to not realize Callum already hit his breaking point 3 days prior during their fight — arguably at 'Callum stared at him with cold eyes. “Dad would be so disappointed in you.”' — and made a game plan accordingly.

Only then, because Callum feeling betrayed by Ezran already happened (“She’s our family, why isn’t that—”), does Ezran have his turn of feeling betrayed by his brother. Like Ez isn't being fair, but he's also not being entirely unreasonable. But being lied to / stolen from and then left with only a letter (and even Rayla being more guilt ridden / softer because she and Ezran weren't arguing directly) has got to sting.

I feel like partially because Callum is his older brother, even though Callum can be frustrating / meaner than needed sometimes... Ez has never known a time without his brother, y'know? They're not always on the same side (1x09 my beloved) but having Callum's care and priority is something that Ez has built a lot of his life on, even as the timeskip kind of chipped away at some of it because Callum was such a mess.

And at the same time while Callum is giving as much as he can while also holding space for Rayla, he's holding back and being unfair too, just like Ezran. Which Ez kind of knows, because he's crying instead of screaming because even though he Wants to be angry about all this, he is at his core mostly just Sad (which is the way grief usually works anyway).

Basically: I love situations where everyone's feelings are valid and understandably there even if what people are doing with those feelings is messy and wrong while also not being entirely wrong, either, and this scene was a great way to showcase this.

Other notes:

Throughout the fic Soren is almost always Right™ since I think Soren, due to the breadth of his personal experiences and what he's given himself time to process (or not to process), and he has a unique perspective here in regards to how everything's gone down (which gets explored more later). Here, he's thinking about how he and Claudia disagree on so much but still love each other, and seeing Ez and Callum being not nearly as splintered, of course (and they're not) but still at risk of splintering if they don't get some of their shit in gear.

You also have Rayla, who in typical "Rayla's internalized fashion" is constantly running damage mitigation and her goodbye letter, this time to Ezran, is full of it as well as her own assurances that Runaan can/will change upon release (which is not something Callum promised Ez earlier) because we love bias and Rayla's rare optimistic streak that mostly concerns her loved one's abilities to be Better than they necessarily are in this household.

[nakianshuri]

Based on a few posts against Stancy that I’ve read in passing that last few months, I realized that to ship Stancy, you have actually have to believe Steve and Nancy’s stories as they are being told. Specifically, you have to accept two things: 1) Steve and Nancy have changed and 2) they have shared trauma (Barb’s death), and to complete their arcs, imo, they (specifically Nancy) must dissociate themselves from the shame connected to that trauma. 

Dealing with shame

Yes, Vecna tells Nancy that she killed Barb, but that’s just as ridiculous as him telling Max thinking she was to blame for Billy’s death. Vecna’s not a reliable narrator here. He’s a manipulator and feeds off people’s isolation, secrets, and shame. We saw that most recently in s4 with Chrissy, Fred, Patrick, and Max, who were all struggling with negative self-images based on past trauma.

Nancy once also told Steve that they killed Barb, but again, that makes just as much sense of Max believing that wishing for Billy’s death literally led to his death. None of that is true, but it is reflective of the shame they are both carrying, and both Nancy and Max have pushed their partners away (Steve and Lucas) because that shame has led them to think less of themselves and their relationships. 

Ultimately, Max is not to blame for Billy’s death. Nancy and Steve aren’t to blame for Barb’s death. Both Max and Nancy need to understand that to free themselves of Vecna and move forward (assuming Max gets out of her coma).

Accepting change

This is the hardest part for a lot of viewers online who are against Stancy imo. I’ve seen a lot of posts that have said Steve deserves better than Nancy or Nancy deserves better than Steve based on how they’ve treated each other in the past, which is more fan projection than anything to do with the story being told. Nancy hurt Steve, but he literally thanks her for it, and Nancy got back together with Steve even after his friends publicly slut shame her after thinking she was cheating on him with Jonathan. People may not like that she forgave him after that, or that she forgave Jonathan for the photos, but all of the characters have moved on from those events.

The only thing haunting Steve and Nancy is the baggage left after Barb’s death. Just as Lucas says he didn’t truly see Max or what she was dealing with, neither did Steve in seasons 1 and 2. Steve did not help Nancy in the way she needed it. He wanted to comfort her and keep them safe; she wanted to take action. However, that’s not the dynamic at all now. Nancy leads the charge against Vecna, and Steve follows as support. Steve now leaps into danger every season to protect people he cares about deeply. Steve and Nancy as they are now would function entirely differently than Stancy of season 1 and 2, which is why Steve doesn’t yearn for the relationship as it was but thinks they would work because they have changed. 

People can enjoy Steve in non canon relationships, prefer him in previous seasons as much as they like, or ignore his character development as much as they please, and they can have fun with Nancy in other non-canon relationships or imagine her as feeling differently than what they’ve show onscreen. There are all kinds of ways to engage in media.

But the show’s only obligation is to be consistent in the story it’s telling, not the story other fans are telling themselves based on their own biases, desires, and personal experiences. What the story the show has been telling us so far is that Steve and Nancy is that have changed and that carrying shame and negative self-evaluation based on trauma is detrimental to the traumatized person, their relationships with others, and their growth. That to me makes for an infinitely more interesting story than two people whose feelings never change, who never evolve, who define themselves by the shame they carry, and who can’t see each other for who they’ve grown to be. 

[pinkmoondoll9shihtzu]

sorry if you already mentioned it and if you did you can link it np, but what is the significance of the chiron conjunction?

its no problem i havent rly talked about it other than today ^^ but its an energy thats been building for months since they're both slow moving. chiron is an asteroid named after a mythological figure who was a centaur exiled at birth. tho later in life he became a great teacher & mentor due to his experience & compassion. so chiron is nicknamed "the wounded healer" the asteroid represents that part of ourselves. childhood wounds (and past life pain) that hurt the most usually something to do w rejection or abandonment, but its where u have the most capacity to heal others.

north node is a mathematical point in the sky & directly opposite it is the south node. north node shows where our highest destiny lies, the lessons our soul needs to embrace in order to really Level up in this incarnation. south node shows what we're comfortable with, the type of role we already mastered from past lives, most ppl subconsciously cling to habits from their SN because it's too hard & scary & new to move towards their NN. but usually the NN says a lot for someone's secret ideal life they fantasize about at night.. the NN represents the future & how its ultimately ur choice to follow ur dreams or not.

so for them to be conjunct in aries rn on a collective scale has ppl addressing & healing their personal wounds (aries represents Self, the body, root chakra) but also feeling compelled to take action, since aries/mars really is about Doing It. And on a global scale in the past few months we've seen ppl working relentlessly hard to free palestine, as aries/mars also rules over war.. to me i feel the escalation of the genocide is part of the chiron wound, & people all over the world finally being unable to deny the reality of the carnage, the awful realizations the lead to action in ending this decades long nightmare once and for all.. that's how i see it. obviously its not over yet but seems to be at a boiling point. this is very simplified explanation so i hope it doesn't come off as insensitive, not my intention

u can see more about how it's effecting ur personal life by looking at the house placement of aries in ur chart, and any planets in ur chart being aspected by 16 degrees aries. if you've already been taking direct action in your life to heal your wounds, this day/few weeks might b rly nice for u ^^ if you've been avoiding It, there may b a reality check thats ultimately meant to steer u in a better direction for ur future. my advice.. dont try to hide from your pain or push it away, confront it n learn to live with it, forgive yourself, don't feel ashamed or embarrassed, nobody wants u to be perfect ! ! ! give yourself a hug for making it this far.. alchemize new ways to be courageous in the pursuit of your best Self. cus by being your best self you can do the most the help others, thats the highest vibration of aries enRgy. aries is so sincere & innocent & encouraging i rly love it.

Sorry for wall of text i probbly shouldve just made a video, hope it helps tho... Ganbatte anon !!! fearlessly heal your heart and keep your dream alive ! ! ! PMD9<3

[pyrorawr]

It's almost 5 am, been up since 4 am, because why would my brain want normal amounts of sleep, but at least the lack of sleep has allowed me to finally finish another Shenko! 😁

I still gotta run by and edit a few things but this piece has been months in the making but life gets kicking me on my butt but I am so happy it's done. But here is a lil snippet!

It's a little smutty, mostly feelsy but also lil smutty 😁

“Do you want to come up to my cabin?”

Shepard heard herself say the words, but suddenly felt her stomach anxiously churn and wondered if she should've spoken up. Her mind had acted from her memories of them from the SR1. Where they often spent nights engulfed in each other's arms and ventured into each other's past, what they felt for each other, and even shared moments merely sleeping next to each other. And that had been what she meant originally when she spoke. However, her mind couldn't help but play the memories of their bodies pressed tightly against each other. It replayed the pleasure that her soul radiated with when Kaidan would allow his biotics to engulf them as he would thrust deeper and deeper inside of her. With the feeling of her cheeks burning, Shepard quickly shook the memory away and desperately tried to ignore the rush of heat building between her thighs. Sure, they had reconciled back at Apollo, and knew that they still deeply loved each other. But she realized that it may not necessarily mean he wanted to make love to her as they hadn't been intimate since SR1 and while she still felt like herself, that she still had the same scars, same body, that Kaidan may not think so. Not after Cerebus had rebuilt her from the ground up. She also couldn't help but steal a glance at the lit up datapad, the unfinished report calling her. Ultimately, Shepard decided to mentally push the report away, and make time for them. Whether that meant snuggling next to her fellow Specter as they slept or hungrily devouring her former lieutenant, like her body intensely craved.

[neallo]

excerpt for an anon question, from an unpublished wip that i am not currently working on,

---

Mello keeps it a secret for almost six months. He thinks he should get credit for a longer time period, because he’s pretty sure he was keeping it a secret even from himself for about a year before that, but it’s admittedly less impressive to hide a crush that even you don't realize you have.

Like every single goddamn misfortune in his life, it’s all Near’s fault. Not just the crush, but also Mello’s ultimate failure to hide it from Matt.

His best friend figures it out when he goes to take their trash downstairs on the last Saturday of February, which he only does because Mello hassles him about it for like, an entire day. He kinda sucks as a roommate, even though he’s a good friend. As Matt is gathering Mello’s trash from beside his desk, though, he pauses and asks Mello—

“You want me to toss this?”

When Mello turns and sees what he’s holding, he freaks out. A little.

“No!” He blurts out way too forcefully.

Matt looks alarmed. “Oh, uh. Sorry. I just thought... it’s from Near, so I didn’t think you’d wanna hang onto it?”

Mello scrambles for an excuse. “It— I’m just keeping it to embarrass him with later,” he says in a rush.

Matt gives him a skeptical look. “Uh. I dunno how well that would work, ‘cause he gave the same Valentine to everyone.”

“He did not,” Mello insists heatedly. “Mine says dear Mello. Dear. Yours just says Matt.” He crosses his arms, triumphant, and suddenly remembers his excuse. “So— so it’s— embarrassing,” he finishes lamely.

The reasoning is pathetically flimsy and they both know it. Matt stares at Mello wide-eyed for a long, uncomfortable moment, dawning realization plain on his face.

“Mello,” Matt finally says, “do you... have a crush on Near?”

Mello laughs too-loud and too-long, sounding hysterical even to himself. “What? That’s crazy. You’re crazy.”

The denial is pointless, a futile attempt to try and retain some dignity though all is very obviously lost.

“Oh, Mells,” Matt says, expression stuck somewhere between pity and amusement.

Mello hates being pitied or mocked, and the rush of anger he feels towards Matt is better than the hot shame and panic that preceded it, so he lashes out. “Shut the fuck up. If you fucking tell anyone I’ll fucking kill you,” he seethes.

“Man,” Matt says, wrinkling his nose, seemingly unaffected by the outburst. “You sure make it hard to be nice to you.”

Mello groans and turns towards his bed, falling onto it face-first. It’s hard to stay mad at Matt when his best friend puts up with so much with so little complaint. Also, after the worst of the anxiety dissipates and he sort of despondently accepts that his secret is out, it’s kind of a relief. Mostly it’s still embarrassing, but Mello has been bottling his infatuation up for the better part of six months now, and maybe talking about it with Matt will help it feel less all-consuming.

After a few minutes of hiding his face in the mattress, he turns his head to the side and looks at Matt, who’s taken a seat on his own bed across from Mello’s. “I wish I was dead,” he says. “It’s horrible. He’s not even that cute.”

“Oh, don’t say that,” Matt says comfortingly. “He’s... kind of charming. In a small, frail way.”

“I guess,” Mello says, like he doesn’t constantly fantasize about protecting Near from harm and getting thanked with an unrealistically tongue-heavy kiss. “There’s something wrong with me. I can’t get past it.”

[iguessitsjustme]

To My Star - Music

It has been 6 months since @gillianthecat requested a music analysis of To My Star. I said I’d do it in a few weeks and I started it then shit life happened but I wanted to actually do the analysis so here it is…a million years later. I will say this might be a bit disjointed because some of my notes are from 6 months ago and the rest are from the past week so apologies in advance for that. I did want to make this a longer post since it’s been so long since it was requested so I might have gotten a bit carried away.

As always this is my disclaimer that I’m just an idiot with a somewhat decent ear and I enjoy soundtracks. I am wrong sometimes so take everything I say with a grain of salt.

Before I get into specifics, my general thoughts are that it’s a fine soundtrack. It’s not my favorite, but it does work very well for the show. It does a good job of keeping the tone that the show is setting. Most of the time the soundtrack helps set the tone of the show, but for To My Star it felt like the actors really set the tone for the show and the music followed. It wasn’t as cohesive as I really like, but it worked well enough that it didn’t stand out as not working. But with that said, I did really enjoy it. Overall it felt like they sampled youtube’s royalty free music catalog except for certain instances, but what they did choose to do actually worked really well but more on that later.

One of the main thingsI noticed when doing my rewatch for this, is that To My Star utilizes silence quite a bit. While there are some instances of music when Han Ji Woo and Kang Seo Joon weren’t around, for the most part, the music only followed their story. Other characters were mostly given silence when they were the focus, which was an interesting choice. It worked for TMS because it wasn’t the only time there was silence. There was always silence during Han Ji Woo and Kang Seo Joon’s important moments. The music waited until something was said before coming in and joining the scene. So it wasn’t as jarring as it would have been to have silence for the other characters. The silence being used for Han Ji Woo and Kang Seo Joon’s important moments made it so when it was silent for the other characters, the audience paid attention because their part in the story is also important. TMS is ultimately about Han Ji Woo and Kang Seo Joon but it’s not just their story as they are impacted by the other characters around them.

But as it is Han Ji Woo and Kang Seo Joon’s story, what were some of their big moments that were impacted by silence? There are a few but I’m only going to talk about what I think is the most important one. At the beginning, Kang Seo Joon hears a crash and has a panic attack as a result (been there my dude, it sucks). There is silence before the crash that leads into the panic attack and there’s silence at the start of the panic attack as well. Then we begin hearing a repetitive, dissonant note during the attack, but it’s backed by calming music that grows louder as Han Ji Woo cares for Kang Seo Joon. This worked almost a little too well for me. I don’t like being reminded of my own panic attacks like that, ya know? But it does a good job of using music to convey what Kang Seo Joon is feeling. We see the panic attack and we can hear it. It’s jarring.

The biggest surprise to me about the soundtrack was realizing that Kang Seo Joon and Han Ji Woo have different genres. Some shows do this and do it really well. A more recent example that I really loved was Never Let Me Go. Both boys had their own distinct genre that had to reconcile with each other when those two were together. That’s probably the one of the easiest shows to watch and pick up on the distinct music for each character. It’s far, far more subtle in TMS, but it’s there.

During the show, Han Ji Woo is a jazzy boy. It’s a smooth jazz, which fits Han Ji Woo’s character very well. He’s soft and subtle and his life should be formulaic and set in routine, but nothing has gone as expected. His routine has been thrown off. He still has his calm, almost stoic exterior, but inside he’s facing turmoil. Kang Seo Joon has come into his life and brought something new and unexpected. He’s facing feelings he wasn’t aware he could still feel and he’s willing to do things he didn’t realize he’s willing to do. Once his turmoil is settled though, he reverts back to what I believe his true genre is: classical. Han Ji Woo is a piano concerto. He’s soft and beautiful and strong. He can get loud and stand up for himself when needed and he can become muted when he’s feeling a little lost. Han Ji Woo settles into his new routine with Kang Seo Joon and he’s no longer a jazzy boy. He’s back to himself as a classical boy. The inner turmoil and struggle Han Ji Woo has felt is made so abundantly clear in this line:

At this moment in the show, Han Ji Woo’s jazz was slowly being taken over by Kang Seo Joon’s music. He was already scared because his genre was off but now even not-his-genre is being overtaken by Kang Seo Joon.

Kang Seo Joon has been consistently coming into Han Ji Woo’s life and overtaking his music. Kang Seo Joon is pop music. He is fun and upbeat. He is the music that so many people in the world listen to. I mean, it’s called pop music for a reason! At first it makes sense that Kang Seo Joon should have the more formulaic music. He seems shallow on the surface, but as always, that’s not the case as he has hidden depth and struggles. A lot of the pop songs that play are in English which was surprising, but they could be a hint at Kang Seo Joon being more than he seems. He’s not just the cookie-cutter celebrity that everyone, including Han Ji Woo, sees him as. He has hopes and fears and he has experienced his fair share of pain. And when he meets and starts falling for Han Ji Woo? Their music starts to blend.

When Han Ji Woo reaches for Kang Seo Joon’s face, about to take an eyelash off, but stops and walks away, leaving them both feeling like something has shifted in that moment, their music combines. It’s both poppy and jazzy. This is the moment that they both start to become aware that there are feelings floating around. 

By the end of the show, Han Ji Woo has embraced his jazziness because he realizes that his life isn’t going to go to routine now that he’s with Kang Seo Joon. When he’s alone, classical music follows him. But when he’s with Kang Seo Joon, he’s back to jazz. And in the very last scene, when those two are in bed and begin making out, the music is pop music but with a little jazz element thrown in. They’ve found their harmony and their balance as their two genres are able to meet to become one.

Here are some other things I noticed but they didn’t make it into the post itself:

-When Han Ji Woo is running to Kang Seo Joon at the end, it’s a pop song playing

-The music in the restaurant is smooth jazz

[creepercraftguy]

NAEGIRI WEEK Day 7 - Class

It’s the last winter at the academy, and neither Makoto nor Kyoko want to leave the best time of their lives behind with any regrets.

@naegiriweek

Full Story below the cut. You can also find the story on my WattPad - https://www.wattpad.com/1294292024-naegiri-week-2022-creepercraftguy-day-7-class

This was it.

Three years ago, Makoto Naegi had officially became a student of the 78th Class of Ultimate at Hope's Peak Academy, as the Ultimate Lucky Student. During this time, he had made some incredible memories.

Sure, the school certainly had some problems that it's prestige made people overlook, but he had made lifelong friends, despite everyone in his class being far more impressive than himself.

But now it was all over. He was nearing the end of his three year course and his last winter at the academy. He'd done his best to plan out his life from that point, preparing to leave the school and head out into the big world.

With so few months left in the school year, and with it being Boxing Day, Makoto was overcome with bittersweet nostalgia. He'd already done a quick scan of the school, running into many of his classmates, as well as underclassmen and upperclassmen alike. Aoi Asahina had invited him and Byakuya Togami to a late Christmas party. He'd had a hearty meal in the dining hall with Shuichi Saihara. He'd talked about his future with Tsumugi Shirogane. And now, he was just sitting by himself in the classroom, collecting his thoughts.

His life had changed so much over the past three years, he didn't know what or how he should feel. However, one thing he realized is that in his heart, he felt that something was missing...

And it wasn't until one of his classmates stepped into the room through the sliding door that he realized what it was.

The Ultimate Detective, and his fellow classmate at Hope's Peak, Kyoko Kirigiri arrived and immediately noticed him sitting down. Makoto was as surprised to see her as she was to see him.

"Oh! Kyoko! Hey!" he greeted her.

"Makoto?" she responded, "what are you doing here?"

"Well...not much to be honest...just...thinking about things," he smiled, "is something wrong?"

Makoto was one of the very few people, especially inside the school, that Kyoko was often honest with. She was usually very abrasive, and despite her willingness to participate, she was usually the quiet one of the conversation, never really chiming in with her opinion unless it mattered immensely. She was a woman with an air of mystery and many didn't understand her, but Makoto felt proud to be one of the few people she trusted to show her softer side. Kyoko grabbed a seat from a different desk and sat down opposite Makoto.

"Nothing, I just stopped by...But now that I'm here, I might as well sit with you, if you don't mind," she explained, "I've been so busy with work lately that it's hard to visit often."

"I see. You do seem pretty busy lately, Kyoko..." Makoto pondered, "You weren't here for Christmas. I thought...I honestly thought wouldn't see you until next year...If at all."

"Did that make you sad?" she smirked.

"Y-Yeah, very," Makoto blushed, "why, is that weird?"

"No...it's sweet of you." she chuckled, "to be honest, I thought that too. So what exactly were you thinking about before I arrived."

"You know what? I was pretty content with my time here, but today I felt like...something might have been missing," he said "my subconsciousness led me to the classroom and...now I know what it is. I think I was missing...You."

"Me...?" she frowned.

"I know how that sounds...And I know you're busy, but..." Makoto explained, "if there's something bothering you, you can tell me. I can help you. Maybe I won't be much help, but...I want to try."

Kyoko hesitated for a second, Makoto's words playing on her. After a brief, and honestly rather awkward, moment of silence, she responded.

"Then...tell me about yourself Makoto."

"Huh? Me? Why now?" he asked.

"I have told you stories about myself, so I think you should tell me yours now, right?" she asked.

"W-Well, I guess you're right..." Makoto stammered, "It's just...I'm so normal. I'm so normal that my story might be over real quick..."

Kyoko shook her head, "Your normal stories might be a nice change of pace for me. I don't really know how normal boys live..."

"Really?" Makoto inquired. She nodded.

"Ever since I was a child, I lived abroad. Afterward, I went to an all-girls middle school." Kyoko explained, "the only males I interacted with were other detectives or clients. Like Shuichi or my Grandfather. And as I've mentioned before, most of the interactions at my Grandfather's agency are...not so friendly."

Makoto recalled the story he had managed to coerce out of her before. Kyoko was the daughter of Hope's Peak's headmaster, Jin Kirigiri. He had been disowned by the family when Kyoko was young, and ever since, Kyoko had always been recognized as an outcast by those who worked for her Grandfather, Detective Fuhito.

"I see...Then my story might be new to you." he considered.

"And...I don't mind the story, as long as it's about you..." Kyoko smiled, "I should control my emotions better...and I shouldn't overstep my boundaries, but..."

With a smile like that, how could Makoto refuse?

They ended up chatting for a long while. Makoto gave Kyoko his backstory and then eventually started to update her on everything she had missed. He told her about Hina's get together as well, and Kyoko promised that she would go.

They also ended up talking about family. As to not cause her any discomfort, Makoto avoided talking about the headmaster for now. He started telling her about his own family and showed her some pictures.

"I see...so that girl I saw you with before was your sister." Kyoko considered, "you're her older brother...That's surprising."

"Yeah her name's Komaru. Why?" he asked.

"Given her height compared to yours, I thought she would be the older one." Kyoko stated bluntly. Makoto frowned.

"Was that an insult?"

"It wasn't intended to be one," Kyoko smirked, "also, I believe I saw a dog in one of the photos? Are you a pet person?"

"Oh, yeah, I got a picture of my dog to show to Mondo. Apparently he's really soft on them...D-Don't tell him I told you that though, he'll bend me in half..." Makoto chuckled awkwardly, "his name's Shinya. He's only a mutt but...he is pretty cute."

Makoto showed Kyoko a picture of Shinya, which she stared at for an unusually long time.

"He's very cute...!" she stated, her eyes sparkling and her face slightly blushing.

He's not the only one that looks cute... Makoto thought, but used every ounce of concentration to hold that thought in, praying Kyoko didn't read it on his face.

"He doesn't really like going out at this time of year because of how cold it is, but I recently got him this," he said, showing Kyoko another picture of Shinya, this time wearing a little doggy sweater "I got this out when I was shopping with my Mom."

"You go shopping with your mother?" Kyoko asked, "that's quite nice."

"Thanks...Usually when I admit that, people make fun of me..." Makoto giggled, "but she likes the company."

"He is very adorable," Kyoko smiled, "he's like a baby bear."

"Yeah well, you're pretty adorable too." Makoto smiled.

"Excuse me?" Kyoko flushed.

Crap...I said it...! Makoto cussed himself, oh well.

"I mean your reaction," he clarified, "I didn't think you'd be so emotionally attached to...well...Anything. Hehe..."

Despite Makoto's harmless comment, Kyoko bore a face like thunder. Realizing that he may have made a mistake, he hurried to apologize.

"I-I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to offend you!" he exclaimed, "I-I was just really happy is all!"

"N-No no, it's ok!" Kyoko shook her head, "you just...caught me off guard is all."

"Huh? With...what?" he asked.

"Is it really that weird to imagine me getting emotionally attached to things?" she diverted her eyes, "I'm...emotionally attached to you, aren't I?"

"Oh...uh...thanks..." Makoto blushed. They sat in an awkward silence, unable to make eye contact with each other.

"I also...think I'm rather emotionally attached to our schoolmates too..." she added.

"Well...that's a good thing, right?" Makoto asked, "we're all very emotionally attached to you too Kyoko."

"I'm aware," Kyoko forced a smile, "you've always been so kind and good to me, and so have the others. Hina never leaves me out, Sayaka always likes talking to me, even someone like Leon treats me as a close friend...I can't just lie and say none of you have had an impact on me, but...that's my problem."

"I don't think it's a problem! We like you! And we like hanging out with you...me especially..." he said under his breath.

"What was that last part?" she asked.

"Nothing, just talking to myself," Makoto shook his head, "my point is that despite your...coldness, if I may be so blunt, you just really, genuinely care about people. To be honest, I wish there were more people in the world like you."

"Thank you...That's nice and all but..."

Kyoko trailed off. She averted her eyes and stared down at her gloved palm, which suddenly became a clenched fist.

"Dammit!" she snapped.

"What!? What's wrong!?" Makoto began to panic. Kyoko was upset that she had alarmed him so much, so she composed herself, and decided to let the beans spill.

"I don't want to leave Hope's Peak," she admitted, "I don't want to say goodbye to everyone. I mean, sure, with my detective work, it means that I haven't been able to spend as much time with everyone as I would have liked...but...even so..."

This was an unusual moment of true honesty from Kyoko. Makoto didn't dare interrupt it.

"I attended Hope's Peak Academy with the intention of cutting all ties with my father as the Headmaster...but...I kept delaying and delaying the moment...And I think it's because I realized that...this place is where I belong," she continued, "I don't want to go back to living as a detective as part of an agency where everyone outcasts me, and there's no telling if cutting ties with Jin Kirigiri will solve the problems I face! I don't want to go back there. I want to stay here with you. And Hina, and Sayaka...Sakura, Mukuro, Leon, Mondo, Taka, Chihiro, Toko, Celeste, Hifumi, Hiro...Hell, I even want to keep hearing Byakuya's sarcastic and biting comments every day...And I even still want to keep listening to Junko ramble on about things that I could never hope to understand...!"

Kyoko buried her face in her arms.

"You're right to believe that I'm not the type to get emotionally attached...I never intended to put down roots and gain such invaluable cohorts but...I did. And now I'm more connected to everyone here than I ever was back home...Even my own Grandfather."

"Kyoko..." Makoto was unsure of what to do. Afraid it might be the wrong move, and ready to retract at any moment should she not approve, he reached out and placed his hand on top of hers. He said no words, but just used his actions to let her know that he was with her, now and forever. Kyoko raised her eyes from her arms and looked up at Makoto, who smiled a warm smile back at her, warming the air around them despite the cold winter making the classroom frigid.

"Sorry, I ranted for a bit too long there...I'm done now..." she sat up straight again, but kept her arms where they were so Makoto could keep hold of her hand. Makoto shook his head.

"Don't apologize," he said, "you should never have to apologize for the way you feel. Ever!"

"I...ok..." Kyoko nodded.

"But hey, if it makes you feel any better, I feel the same way," Makoto confessed, "oftentimes I forget that you're very busy, and that by the time we graduate, I may never see you again. And...it makes me feel a lot of shit...But mostly, it makes me glad that I met you when I did!"

Kyoko's eyes widened with surprise at hearing these touching words. With her gaze making him feel awkward, Makoto released her hand and leant back in his chair, trying to be casual.

"I mean...it also makes me want to punch something, but...that's a tad less poetic."

"Well...I think it depends on the narrative and character," Kyoko smiled, "but...regardless...thank you. For listening...I mean..."

"I will always listen to you...now and forever," Makoto assured her, "you don't have to thank me."

"But...As busy as I might be in the future, I'll be sure to try my best to stay in contact with you and...let you know how I'm doing whatever chance I get," Kyoko smiled, "same goes for the others too. I can't make any promises, but if you want me to come to whatever get-togethers we have after graduation...I'll try my absolute best."

"It's going to feel so weird without you here," Makoto thought, "who am I gonna make fun of Byakuya with?"

"Well...we ALL make fun of Byakuya, don't we?" Kyoko asked.

"Yeah, ok, that was a dumb question," Makoto laughed, and so did she, "but...you get my point."

"Yeah..." she smiled and nodded, "I understand...It was fun Makoto."

Makoto's heart was warm from hearing her be so open, but...something still didn't feel right. Something was still missing. Though he knew it wouldn't always be the case, Makoto felt that if he let the chance go by now, he'd never get it again.

So he decided it was his turn to spill his guts.

"Kyoko?" he spoke up, his face completely flushed red. Kyoko looked at him in surprise.

"Wh-What's wrong?" she asked, "are you coming down with a fever? You look very hot."

"I definitely feel hot, but...it's not because I'm unwell...I think?"

"You think?" she parroted, "what are you talking abou-"

"I just...! I don't want us to go our separate ways!" Makoto cut her off, "because...Because I think I might be in love with you!"

Time seemed to freeze in this single moment. Kyoko's face was blank as she processed his words.

"...What...?" she gasped.

"I know how that sounds...And I know what it means for you...If you accepted my confession and I became your boyfriend, then your life would change in a way you'd never be able to deal with. I get that," Makoto had already confessed, so he refused to back down now. With confidence, he continued speaking, "but...despite how much I may alter your life's course, I really hope you'll allow me the privilege! I will take whatever responsibility is thrust upon me!

Kyoko was dumbstruck, but she gathered herself together and thought of a way to respond. Eventually, she did. She laughed and smiled at him warmly.

"If you're afraid of altering my life in a way that I couldn't comprehend, then I'm afraid you've already done that..." she spoke softly.

"Haha...I guess you're right...We were literally just talking about it," Makoto laughed awkwardly, "but I'm serious. I love you, and I want you to go out with me!"

"But...relationships like this are usually equivalent exchange...aren't they?" Kyoko blushed profusely, "I don't know if my work will even allow me to make time for you. Even if you gave me everything, there's little I could give you in return."

"I'm not doing this because I want a reward or something!" Makoto exclaimed, "you've long since realized this yourself, but a relationship between two people isn't just some obligation that can be retracted or reset at any different time. Especially not a romantic one! People who show up in your life don't just disappear and leave nothing behind. I won't, we won't, and you won't. And I'd like to keep my raindrop for as long as possible!"

Makoto cupped both of Kyoko's gloved hands.

"I don't need you to balance the books. I get that you would be busy, but I just want to be with you whenever I can. You don't have time? That's ok! I'll MAKE time! And I'll make you a life that you can enjoy! I'll give you anything and everything I can to make sure you live in a way that you're HAPPY with...So please...let me be a part of your future."

Kyoko was stunned. This kind of behavior from someone like Makoto, who was typically a wet blanket, was fascinating. Truth be told, Kyoko had felt a similar way towards him, but due to not being well attuned to her emotions early on in her academy days.

Kyoko responded as such. She got to her feet and walked around to the other side of the desk. She reached out a hand and pulled Makoto to his, making them level with each other.

"Are you absolutely sure?" Kyoko asked, "I'm hardly the best girlfriend material amongst our classmates, and I can be tiresome to deal with."

"Like I said already, I don't care if you can't always make time, or if you're tiresome," Makoto smiled, "I could even say that your astute nature to your work is something to be proud of."

This was all she needed to hear. Kyoko, still red in the face, breathed a huge sigh. She took a small step forward and rested her head on Makoto's shoulder, who wrapped his arm around her.

"Alright..." she responded quietly "you're mine...and I'm yours..."

[best-underrated-anime]

Best Underrated Anime Group B Round 2: #B5 vs #B8

#B5: Amateur college track team aims for big race

#B8: Middle school idol drama

Titles, propagandas, trailers, and poll under the cut!

#B5: Run with the Wind (Kaze ga Tsuyoku Fuiteiru)

Summary:

Former ace runner of Sendai Josei High School, Kakeru Kurahara is chased away from a convenience store for shoplifting. Shaking off his pursuer, he runs into Haiji Kiyose, another student from his university. Haiji is impressed by Kakeru's agility and persuades him to live in Chikusei-sou, the run-down apartment where Haiji resides along with eight other students. Having lost his entire apartment deposit at a mahjong parlor, Kakeru accepts the offer reluctantly.

However, Haiji reveals a secret during Kakeru's welcoming party: the apartment is actually the dormitory of the Kansei University Track Club. He unveils his ultimate goal of participating in the Hakone Ekiden—one of the most prominent university marathon relay races in Japan. Unfortunately, all the residents apart from Haiji and Kakeru are complete running novices. Worse still, none of the inhabitants are even remotely interested in being involved with Haiji's ridiculous plan! With only months before the deadline, will the fourth-year student be able to convince them otherwise and realize his elusive dream of running in the Hakone Ekiden?

Propaganda 1:

Okay so, finally a sports anime that isn’t set in high school. (There aren’t nearly enough set in college.) MC is basically Older Running Kageyama, in both looks and personality. He has to overcome his past issues with his old track team, and learn to open up. I love the relationships that form between the team members. There’s one who is just Not Here for It and struggles A Lot, who just wants to go home and read manga. (Hey it me.) There’s also a cute dog, and a lot of the bg music is by the same folks as Haikyuu.

Propaganda 2:

I genuinely think this might be the best sports anime out there. It’s an amazing anime in general, with good animation, a beautiful art show, and a great premise, though what really makes it stand out is the characters.

RWTW is a character-driven story at heart, with all the main characters given their time to shine. The main cast is very lovable, and their relationships with each other are depicted in a sweet but realistic way. The protagonist, Kakeru, goes through a great character development over the course of the show, from being a lonely outcast at the start to accepting the other team members into his heart as found family.

While I’m not a runner personally, I still found this interesting to watch, since along with the training there’s a lot of thoughtful discussion on the nature of running: what it means to run, to be a runner. There’s a very philosophical aspect to it, which makes sense considering that RWTW is actually adapted from a book. The last thing I’ll say is that as a college student myself, it’s really nice to watch an anime focused on people in college and not high school. Oh, and the soundtrack is incredible.

Trigger Warnings: Alcohol and Smoking

#B8: Pretty Rhythm: Rainbow Live

Summary:

Naru Ayase is an 8th grader who can see the colors of music when she listens to it. For Naru, who is extremely good at decorating, becoming the owner of a shop like Dear Crown was her dream. One day, she finds out that the manager of a newly-opened shop is recruiting middle school girls who can do Prism Dance, and immediately applies. Naru begins to Prism Dance at the audition, and an aura she’s never experienced spreads out in front of her. At that moment, a mysterious girl named Rinne asks her if she can see “rainbow music.”

Propaganda:

WHERE DO I START.

First off: Lesbian activities. Ayase Naru and Rinne Amagi are very close friends and even end up living together. Naru is also only one of the few characters without a proper love interest which really helps further the Naru/Rinne ship.

Otoha Takanashi: often talks about fairy tales, but the only characters she ever sees as Princes are women. Baby lesbian, I love her.

Second: DRAMA. So two of the characters (Ito and Kouji) actually start dating, but their parents do not approve for reasons they are evasive about until it is later revealed in the story—[This part of the propaganda has been cut by admin due to possible spoilers]

Third: banger music. This series includes many covers of popular 90s dance tracks from band TRF, which I am fond of. It also has a lot of unique music written for the show itself which is also good, especially for a children’s show.

Trigger Warnings: It might need the emotional abuse tag for specifically one of the characters’ parents, who is a pretty extreme perfectionist when it comes to her daughter. But nothing else aside from that. It’s a kids’ show, so it never goes that far in terms of actual harm. Most things also get resolved peacefully.

When reblogging and adding your own propaganda, please tag me @best-underrated-anime so that I’ll be sure to see it.

If you want to criticize one of the shows above to give the one you’re rooting for an advantage, then do so constructively. I do not tolerate groundless hate or slander on this blog. If I catch you doing such a thing in the notes, be it in the tags or reblogs, I will block you.

Know one of the shows above and not satisfied with how they’re presented in this tournament? Just fill up this form, where you can submit revisions for taglines, propaganda, trigger warnings, and/or video.

[the-therapist-is-ace]

HERE IT IS @sappy-detective HOPE YOU LIKE IT

-Also if Shuichi feels like being irritated and less patient than usual it's because I was almost done and the thing erased itself so I had to rewrite it all x(

Shuichi was nervous. Which was, for those who knew him well, a fact thay wasn't exactly surprising. Still, he would like to think that here it was understandable.

His uncle had dragged him into one of those charity galas, where everyone was pretending to be but a humble person wishing to help. Where everything was a sham, and where the amount of money being thrown in those were enough to make the detective dizzy.

But unfortunately they didn't had a choice. After the Tragedy, numerous corporations got back together, or others emerged from the ground through... questionnable means. And Future Foundation finally made the Ministry of Justice bend to their will to get those groups investigated. But who would take care of such a heavy task? Take a guess...

Needless to say, his uncle's agency had been extremely busy these past few months. Not only that, but the fact that he was now recognized as the Ultimate Detective pratically pushed him to also be considered the Kirigiris' legacy's successor (why him?!)

But even after the Ministry of Justice agreed to help, in reality they didn't really intervene much. His uncle and himself were still denied the authority to investigate, and it was seriously becoming a problem, as they were hitting dead ends after dead ends because of being denied access to valuable informations.

And that was why they were here this evening. This charity gala was the best option for them to be able to approach the only person capable of giving this authority on so many cases and against corporations.

The Minister of Justice himself, Ken Saito.

Since he will be of attendance, that was why Shuichi was in a suit that his uncle gave him. -which was seriously itching his neck too...- He nervously reajust the collar at that.

He didn't even had his hat with him, he had to leave it at the agency (but by god did he wanted to have it right now. There were too many people, too much lights and too many eyes to avoid.) so he avoided eye contact as best as he could. Letting his uncle do the talking and following him close.

At first it wasn't much. Mundane talking, false politeness and the hypocrisy of the upper classes. You know, the usual in such an event...

That was until the minister arrived.

Immediatly, a crowd started to appear around him, as everyone was trying to greet him, or ask something, or try to get a favor... Nothing surprising really. It was always better to be on the side of the person who's literally responsable for every cases in Japan after all. But...

"Shuichi. his uncle said. I'm going to try and talk to the minister. You stay here, I'll be right back."

"What? But I want to help-" he frowned.

"I know, but be honest with me Shuichi. Do you really think you will be alright in a crowd like this? upon seeing the amount of people he grimaced and his uncle chuckled. I thought so. he pat his head. Why don't you help yourself with the food here in the meantime? I'll try to be quick."

After that, he left in the direction of the crowd. And since his nephew didn't have much to do and was invited to do so... Well he went towards the buffet.

The music was starting to hurt his head also, so getting away wasn't that bad.

Anyway, the detective was looking at all those hors-d'œuvres with a frown. They all just looked needlessly complicated and he was hungry.

"If I were you, I'd try the ones with cheese!"

He was about to just mumbled a thank you and go on his merry way when he realized...

Wait a minute, I know that voice.

At that, he turned around so quickly he almost dropped his plate.

"K-Kokichi?!"

"Oh, did I scare you that bad? Oopsie! I didn't mean to! he chuckled. Or maybe I wanted to see you jump out of your skin! Who knows. I'm a liar after all!"

It was. The Ultimate Supreme Leader (whatever that means) was right in front of him, his hands behind his head and a grin on his face.

That wouldn't be surprising if they were at the Academy. That wouldn't be surprising if Kokichi wasn't wearing a suit himself (but he was using his scarf as a tie he noticed. Also were those purple socks?) and he wasn't looking as if being of attendance in a gala was a mundane thing to do every day.

"W-Wha- How- What are you doing here?!" he managed to sputtered.

"Hm? he cocked his head to the side. Is Shuichi telling me that I have no rights to be here? That I should be kicked out? So mean! Are you going to call security on me? How could you?!" he whinned, starting to tear up.

Saihara winced and nervously glanced around. He knew that crocodile tears were coming and that if it was like at the Academy, it would create quite a scene. Which would be uh, bad in a place like this.

But to his surprise, even though Kokichi had tears in his eyes he wasn't screaming. Or doing anything other than pouting actually. The detective blinked.

"Wha-"

"What? Did you really think I would be stupid enough to cause a scene in a place like this? he looked at his palm in disinterest, crocodile tears nowhere to be seen. Pleaaaaaase Shuichi give me some credits! I'm not an idiot like the Astronaut!"

...Right. He forgot that the other teen could be serious sometimes. But it happened so rarely he's still surprised to see that side of Ouma's personnality.

"Alright... he frowned. But you still didn't answer my question. What are you doing here?"

"Oh that? he grinned, putting his hands behind his head again. What can I say, I have powerful minions! They can even let me in a place like this. Lucky me right?"

The detective sighed and mentally put that in the "unanwsered" part of his mind. Because that had to be a lie. However the other wasn't done.

"Buuuuut... what about you? he put a finger on his chin. What are you doing here Shuichi? Because that's not the kind of place you like to be at." well he wasn't wrong.

"I had to accompagny my uncle to get investigation authority from the minister of justice." he answered, trying to keep it brief.

"Oh yeeeeeeeah right. So you don't get kicked out of your investigation." he said with disinterest, looking at his palm as if it wasn't a matter of the upmost importance.

"Y-Yeah. we keep hitting dead ends because we don't have the authority-"

"Weeeeeeeell seems to me like getting to talk to Kenny is going to be a bit hard you know?" he said, pointing at the crowd.

Shuichi winced. He couldn't even make his uncle in all of this mess.

"I-I know. It looks like it will be impossible tonight..." he sighed.

"If Kaito heard you he would have punched you for saying that. he again looked at his palm in disinterest. Hmmm... he put a finger on his chin again, thoughtful. I mean I could get you a one-on-one with my minion, but what can you give me in return Shuichi?"

The detective almost tripped at the statement.

"K-Kokichi you are not implying that you have contacts with the Minister of Justice." he sputtered, not even daring to say "under you" as the thought alone was too preposterous to be true.

But instead of just laughing it off as usual and saying "yep it's a lie!" the leader merely shrugged.

"Hmmm? Is Shuichi not believing me? So mean. he scoffed. Buuuuuuut since he oh so generously asked for my help, I guess I can bring you Kenny for a little talk! You'll owe me big for this one though. Bu-byyyyyye!"

Before the detective could even try to aligne a coherent sentence, the other waved and disappeared in the crowd, leaving a very confused Shuichi who was wondering what the hell just happened behind. _______________________________________

Not so long afterwards his uncle had returned. And Saihara didn't need him to talk to guess that from his expression, it did not go well.

"Sorry Shuichi... I couldn't get a word to him." he sighed.

"I-It's not your fault Uncle... There's a lot of people tonight." he tried, looking at the still crowd around the minister.

"That's for sure. But let's not give up. he tried a smile. Let's wait to see if we have an opening alright?" from his tone he wasn't even convincing himself, but Shuichi nodded.

"Alright..."

"Now come on, you went to the buffet right? Show this old man around, I'm starving!"

He quickly obliged, forgetting in the process that he ever met Ouma here of all places. He merely followed his uncle to get some food while they eat together and discuss detective work. (Not in front of possible suspects though. There were a lot of wealthy people here, including people from the corporations they were investigating, so they needed to keep a low profile.)

The evening passed quietly after that. Not much they could do, only checking from time to time if there were less people around the minister. There wasn't. If anything, as time went by it seems that more people where coming. It seems like tonight was not the day they would be able to speak to the minister... But if not tonight, then when?

However, Shuichi's thoughts came to a halt when his phone buzzed in his pocket. He shot a confused looked to answer his uncle's curious one before taking his phone out.

It was... private messages from Kokichi.

Kokichi: all done :p

Kokichi: if you want to have your talk, go outside and turn left

Kokichi: also you owe me a big favor now >:)

A frown. Wasn't that taking the joke too far?

"Shuichi? Is everything alright?"

"O-Oh uh, yes. Sorry uncle I just... recieved a message I didn't expected."

"Kokichi? Isn't that one of your friend?" he asked after reading over his shoulder.

"He's not a friend. a pause. He's uh... an acquaintance? A classmate."

Truth be told Shuichi didn't even know what Ouma was asides from their class' troublemaker. Asides from Gonta and Miu nobody could pretend they knew him well enough to be called "friends".

However before his uncle could respond, he got another message.

Kokichi: don't leave me and Kenny wait Shuichi! >:(((((

He was really going for the extra mile with it... Knowing him, he probably should go otherwise the other will bother him until he break. He sighed.

"I'm sorry Uncle but I have to go... If I don't he will continue."

"Oh don't apologize Shuichi. Actually, I think it's a good idea for you to take some fresh air, away from... All of that. he motioned to the crowd... which had dispersed? but no minister to be seen. Come to think of it, I think I will follow you too. Besides, I'm curious to see one of your classmates! You almost never bring them, I will start thinking you made them up!"

He sputtered at that. Kaede and Kaito aren't made up!

"I-I have friends! he protested. But bringing them to the agency isn't really professionnal..."

"Shuichi, you're just an apprentice for now, I will never tell you anything about it not being professionnal! he laughed. Now come on, let's not make your classmate wait!"

The Ultimate didn't protested, and merely followed his uncle to the door.

Once they were out, the detective let a deep breath out. It felt good to have a bit of fresh air... Especially after being stuck in a heavy atmosphere like inside the building for so long.

"Now Shuichi, where did you said he was waiting for us again?"

"He said to turn left." he mumbled.

However Saihara didn't know what to do. Technically he knew what to expect, it was just a bad prank even if it was a bit much.

But his uncle wouldn't be that understanding... Let's just hope the leader wouldn't get in too much troubles pranking an actual detective.

He sighed and took the turn with his eyes closed. Let's get this over with...

Then he stopped dead in his tracks, surprising his uncle who also stopped behind him.

"Shuichi? What's wrong-" when he saw what Shuichi saw, his voice died.

There was Kokichi alright. But he was talking to someone-

To Ken Saito.

He was talking to the freaking Minister of Justice. Casually. As if it was normal.

...

WHAT?!

Now, let him and his uncle the time to bring their jaws back from the floor in front of that unbelievable scene please. Thank you. Was there something in the food at the party to cause hallucinations like these? Shuichi wasn't sure but it would be worthy to check...

Anyhow, the illusion wasn't broken when Kokichi finally noticed them. Instead it continued, while he waved at them with a bright grin. Which also make the minister (the actual one. WHAT-) turn towards them as well.

Okay this is fine. Everything is fine. His classmate is with one of the most powerful men of Japan. Everything is perfectly fine. And why did they looked so friendly towards each other?

"Theeeeere you are Shuichi, I thought you ditched us!"

Nope, the minister was still here. That... probably wasn't an illusion then. But then how-?

A possibility quickly crossed his mind and he frowned.

"Kokichi, please tell me you didn't kidnapped the minister."

At his words, his classmate's eyes widden almost comically. Before crossing his arms.

"Shuichi really thinks I would kidnap Kenny? So mean! I'm evil but not that evil you know? I have standards!"

"Ahem, young man. the minister smiled at him. I can assure you, no kidnapping were involved here. I came here of my own volition."

Well, Saihara just embarassed himself in front of the minister of justice, this is fine. Perfectly fine. He felt his cheeks burning furiously. In the meantime his uncle was completely confused in the background.

"But if that's the case Sir. suddenly said his uncle. With all due respect, what are you doing here with a teenager, even an Ultimate?"

Mister Saito smiled at that, and the leader grinned.

"What can I say, it is impossible to refuse a favor to your little leader over here." he said, putting a hand on said-leader's head who giggled.

Aaaand that's it. We lost Shuichi. His brain just refused to compute what Ken Saito said. And did. Because it was impossible.

His classmate was lying... right?

This was all just an elaborate prank... right?

But why would the minister actually go with it? What would such a person, that is probably as rich as the Academy would gain from this? It didn't make any sense.

"I'm... sorry Sir but I think I misheard. What did you say?" his uncle was as shocked as him.

And in the meantime Ouma was just laughing in the background. Apparently the situation amused him a lot, which knowing the other teen is probably true.

"That's what you get for not believing me Shuichi! But I still did my end of the deal, you owe me a huge favor now! Also Kenny's kinda busy so hurry up and tell him what you need."

Right. Right they were at this gala for a reason, to get this damn investigating authority to be able to go further in their work. And his uncle didn't forget about that either, since he immediatly took the lead of the conversation with the minister.

In ten minutes they had a promise of getting the authority to investigate anyone they wanted, no matter how big the corporation, anywhere they needed, no matter the extraterritorial rights and the garantee to have the evidences they would gather protected.

While Kokichi was merely watching, a grin on his face and his hands behind his head.

"Is that all? the minister asked. Because I am afraid I have to return quickly..." he sighed.

"Urgh those old geezers are the worst. complained Kokichi. Can't leave you alone for a minute!"

"And yet you still asked to come." Ken Saito said with a raised eyebrow.

"Well duh, I couldn't let poor Shuichi complain about going nowhere with his investigation everyday! I'm evil, not heartless you know? he shrugged. Especially when my dear Kenny here have exactly what he need to finally stop sobbing about it!"

"I wasn't sobbing!" he protested.

Wait pause.

Did Ouma just admit that he came tonight just to help them -him-? What happened to the prankster that harassed -a bit too far by moment- Keebo?

"Besides my dear minion needed an excuse to have some fresh air from those jerks too."

"I can't deny that a bit of air did me a great good. he smiled and extended his hand to Shuichi's uncle. Well, since the little chief over there thought that my help was necessary, let me know if you need anything else. Or well, let him know, he will pass the message to me."

"I-Yes. Yes of course." seems like his uncle was just as shocked by the whole ordeal as he was.

"Well then, if you excuse me..."

He politely nodded before going back inside, leaving two detectives shocked and a leader snickering behind.

"Your faces are priceless! he laughed. I wish I had a camera to record that!"

"I- he shook his head. K-Kokichi, how?!"

"Sorry Shuichi! Noooooo telling! That's a super-duper secret. There's a reason why DICE never got arrested! a wink, then a pause. Aaaaaaand since this evening is so boring I don't see any reason to stick around! See you next time Shuichi, bu-byyyyyye!"

And just like that he was gone, sprinting until it was impossible to guess his form in the night.

When his uncle finally snapped from his shock to tell him they should go home, Saihara just nodded. But when they arrived there, other messages were waiting for him.

Kokichi: just tell me if you have any hard to crack cases! DICE will love to help

Kokichi: ...only if you join us tho! :p

Kokichi: and don't think i forgot about you owing me!

Kokichi: i want free grape panta for two months! or you could always join :>

The detective shook his head at that but couldn't help a small smile. He just prepared himself for the night, before sending a "I think I will just pay for your grape panta instead..." then went to sleep.

Well, seems like he knew what to do before coming back to classes Monday.

He'll need to ask for money to his uncle...

_______________________________________

To this day Shuichi still didn't know how the hell Kokichi got contacts with the Minister of Justice. (No he won't say working under him because it still feel too absurd to be true.) Because everytime he tried to bring the subject up, the other teen would just laugh and say "that's a leader's secret!" and refuse to elaborate, then change the topic. So Saihara had no choice but to drop the subject... If only the written document giving his uncle and himself the authority to investigate on his uncle's desk wasn't tickling his curiosity everytime he put his eyes on it.

When Kaede came to him exasperated, saying that Kokichi again lied about having one of her favorite musician in his organization, he couldn't help wondering if it had a part of truth in it...

If the Minister of Justice, why not a reknown pianist?

[robbierants]

THE FIRST OFFICAL POST OF ROBBIE RANTS

Todays Rant: Transgender Representation In Modern Anime

Hello Yall! I was reading fanfics pn A03 and that got me thinking about modern representation in anime of Transgender, Gay, Lesbian and Bisexual people. Specifically Trans Rep.

Alright, so I did some research on what everybody else thinks about this topic. A lot of people who were not trans thought that representation in anime was complete bullshit. As a person who identifys under the trans umbrella, I've actually been quite pleased by my representation in media. Everyone knows about Ouran High School Host Club, the story of Haruhi, who goes to a high school for the rich and bored. They (I see them as nonbinary) makes friends and explores their identity, and everyone looks like they were drawn in Ibis Paint, I found the anime amazing and have seen it many times (ive read the manga 5 times in. Row man) . If you want an intro into LGBT in anime though, this is your go to.

Now if we want to talk about something very cerebral and powerful, Black Butler/Kuroshitsuji's Ciel Phantomhive is our guy. I see him personally as nonbinary (He/they respective)

Alot of people see his romp through gender in the first few episodes as a reflection of drag, or an excuse for man-in-drag humor. Well, there's a lot more to it than that. When I was coming out to myself, I was incredibly transphobic (being raised by catholic parents also doesny help) to myself, saying that "I can't be anything but a girl. It's not allowed". This mindset kept me from my own truth, up until a few months ago.

Ciel is very opposed to many things he defines as feminine and un-manly. When he has to infiltrate the party of a perverted count (I love his design tho!) he dresses in a frilly dress and pigtails. We can see how uncomfortable with it he is at first, squirming and complaining. Later in the series however, he comes to embrace parts of it. He wears clothes that could be considered androgynous, embraces a feminine side, and becomes quite the diva (I love Ciel Guys)

I like to think of the first season as a reflection of Ciel's mental state. He lives the first couple episodes blissfully, as a Cisgender male. In episode 4, he "dons an evening gown", and allows the possibility of this other sex.

I remember doing this very briefly when I was 10 with a suit. To be perfectly honest? It freaked me the fuck out. I was terrified of being who I was, so I ripped the idea from my mind. This is exactly what happens to Ciel. The only difference is that when I thought I might be man, I wasn't almost sold on the black market like Ciel.

Later in the season Ciel allows the possibility again, through subtle remarks at his butler, servants, and peers. He realizes that there are deeper levels to his psyche, and without spoiling anything, he confronts his traumatic past in a number of ways. One major piece of evidence is when the theme song changes midseason. Originally, the opening lines of the song say, "The monochrome blows Through our colorless encounter. I shall entrust each of my pains to you." Later in the series, the opening lines change to, "Since then, I've actually come to like the night. In a sea of dependence I forgot even to breath." If that doesn't convince you, nothing will. Ciel is nonbinary (He/They) who likes to wear femanine clothing some times. Don't @ me

Another awesome example of a Trans female in anime is Chihiro Fujisaki of the Danganronpa franchise. This is a slightly more to the point story of Transgender psychology. Chihiro Fujisaki is one of the many students trapped in the hellish prison school of Hope's Peak. Chihiro is "the ultimate programmer", having created game changing software and programs. Chihiro is also biologically male. We don't know this until she turns up dead, and the only reasonable cause of this was someone in the Boy's locker room murdered her. Chihiro got into the locker room using her birth sex as an excuse.

Chihiro is also known for being very socially awkward, depressed, and kind. These are all characteristics very common of teenage Trans females. I know a couple of my trans femme friends fall under these categories. Chihiro is a perfect example of a passable Trans woman flying perfectly under the radar until being looked into further. If you knew how many Trans people would kill for this, you'd realize how truly rare Chihiro is as a character.

Chihiro notably built herself what is known in the programming world as a "Construct".

For those of you unaware, a construct is a direct copy of the users brain, rewritten via computer code. "Alter Ego", as she is called, is a version of Chihiro built to protect and inform the other students.

Now, if only I had an artificial intelligence to answer peoples stupid questions about being Trans!

Of course, on the subject of Trans anime, there's enough transmisogyny to go around. Let me show you some iconic anime clips you may not have known were transphobic;

Naruto's "Sexy Transformation"? Transphobic

Ouran High School Host Club's Over-explanatory Lines? Transphobic.

Black Butler's Pronoun Butchering of Grell? Transphobic.

(CMON BLACK BUTLER!)

I hope this has informed you on the potential of Trans people in anime. I highly suggest you check out shows like Black Butler, Ouran Host Club, and Danganronpa.

[marinecorvid]

2.21.23 (but actually drawn at least a month ago - and now posted 6.2.23) - some xy fic sketches. rambles beneath the cut

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in my Great Fanfiction Rewrite of the (X)Y plot because it was sadly lacking in some places, Calem/Xavier kinda sorta joins Team Flare! To be honest this isn't my 100% original idea, I saw someone post once on here somewhere how cool it would've been if your rival, frustrated with constantly losing to you, joined Team Flare in desperation to beat you. I have taken this concept and am running with it. Xavier in my story Did Not take kindly to losing the Mega Ring to Yvonne: a rookie trainer, a girl, a girl who doesn't fall into his preconceived notions of what a young female trainer should be like, a girl he initially assumed he would be in a relationship with and he'd be the tough trainer in contrast to her contest abilities, someone from a poorer family from his. He gets uhh a little wild trying to prove his might makes right (deeply sheltered child who was never exposed to anything that would upset him syndrome)

In my head Y is the canon, but I'm doing a ramshackle combo into a tentative Z in which Yvonne and Yveltal fight Lysandre together, but also Xavier and Xerneas at some point and Zygarde is there too as a result of Team Flare managing to find BOTH legendaries (who in the anime were depicted as being right on top of each other) but only figuring out how to use Yveltal in the Ultimate Weapon. Xavier steals the Poke Flute and uses it to wake Xerneas (willingly or not - he's irrational, but IDK how down he'd be for the "destroy the world" plot, but Xerneas DEFINITELY uses ~fairy powers~ to fuck with his mind)

Yvonne has vitiligo! Dyes her hair blonde for the first halfish of the game, lets it grow out to its natural brown as a symbolic representation of not wanting to conform to certain beauty standards. She starts wearing very snazzy suits post-game, avoiding short sleeves and skirts

My HC is that Sycamore is her da! He and Grace were an item back in the day when Grace was in Kalos Rhyhorn racing, and she only realized she was pregnant when she'd already left. Sycamore didn't feel ready at all to be an active father, and Grace didn't feel any strong need to be in a relationship with him/have him be a part of Yvonne's life with a strong circle of friends and family who'd help with childrearing, so he stayed in Kalos and continued his work on evolution and Fairy Types in Kalos, every other month or so receiving an email of an update of Yvonne's life in progress. Eventually Grace's racing injuries/chronic pain is too debilitating to continue racing, and Sycamore offers his grandparents' cottage in the starting town. Yvonne knows her father is an academic/scientist in Kalos but doesn't know it's him, and doesn't want to know until she's more comfortable in the region. She DOES start to suspect though, but only confirms it mid/post-Geosenge crisis (haven't decided how long that's drawn out) in a hospital bed. Sycamore (after years of watching his daughter grow up from afar, and has become more invested in her life in the past few years) is delighted that she's willing have a familial connection

a lot of people draw Yveltal as a bird (super cool, no judgement) but it's very dragon-y to me with the hands/wings, kinda like how bat wings are just elongated fingers with skin between them. The logic of the tail eludes me though. It's Yvonne's buddy post game! As much as she does not want it to be her buddy! But when a super powerful ancient deity of death decides it wants to be your friend there's not a lot you can do to stop it. She warms up to it eventually. They have a fun time threatening Malva together

Korrina is a sports lesbian

Shauna slight redesign. She and Yvonne become an item around Laverre. In my story there's a cool Ren Faire-ish thing happening when they arrive and they both get a little tipsy and kiss and spend the evening running around in semi-accurate reenactment dresses giggling and dancing and giving each other wildflowers

Gogoat =)

[bisluthq]

This is obviously a projection but after hearing the album, a part of me thinks that she actually never went to therapy until last year when she had that mental breakdown lol. But even independently of that, the whole album is her deconstructing an entire belief system and seemingly being determined to close a cycle that was jumpstarted by her rs with Jake G, which is her searching for salvation from love, using sex for control and/or communication, looking for a higher meaning in what happens to her romantically, believing that her lovers come to her life by fate. There's such heavy religious imagery throughout the whole album as well, and she always sung about Joe as a form of saviour that found her in her lowest moment, loved her and saved her, and eventually helped her heal. The Manuscript as the conclusion of the album is her making an argument that the higher meaning for her maybe isn't fate, but instead songwriting. Imo she's put lots of work (in therapy and elsewhere) to no longer view love as something that is fated to be for her or something that is supposed to be her salvation, which is why the Travis songs very notably don't paint him as a saviour or as something sent to her by fate, like most of all her previous love songs do (that also might be bc those songs were written when they were only a few months in though lol). She's very purposefully trying to not look for those sort of things from love anymore cos she's learned the hard way that it only leads to toxicity. She even begs for someone to change this fate in The Prophecy, only to realize that she's the only one who can do it; it's up to her and that's both empowering and terrifying, but ultimately very brave that she's determined to try. With Travis, she's very transparently looking for companionship and compromise, not for salvation or identity. It's why imo she really needed to put out this entire album as it is, completely raw, bloated, and unedited, in all of its glorious messines. As an art product, it's not as excellently curated and of the technical (cohesion, continuity, etc) quality as are folklore or Midnights, but that's not the point of this album. As a fellow pathological people pleaser, I find it very admirable that for once she decided to not cater to anyone's demands and expectations when in the past she has very obviously curated her work to be what the Recording Academy looks for (1989), what the public outside of her fans want from her (folkmore), or just to prove herself against critics (og Speak Now). She said "fuck that, I'm doing this for me because I need a fucking exorcism from this" and not only do I really respect that but I also love it as character growth and artistic evolution for her. And yeah, I know she's mad unhinged and there's a lot of ways in which she never grew up or matured and she tends to look for the thrill and excitement and thus often bolts from love, but I genuinely think this was a turning point for her and unpopular take maybe but imo Travis is a part of breaking that cycle. Obviously shit happens and nothing is ever perfect forever but idk I'm highkey a stan lol so I'm really rooting for her to continue being as healthy as she is right now and hopefully get all these personal things that she has always dreamed of.

eh except she did say Travis is something that comes along every couple lifetimes and he’s got her in a way no man has before. I’m not getting “Taylor’s been to therapy” from this album. I’m getting “Taylor did this instead of therapy”. I think she might’ve gone for her ED but she stopped and hasn’t been in ages. I do think Trav might convince her to go lol and is generally a very good influence.