#they are all in misery here

[osamusriceballs]

The Accident - Part XIII

Atsumu x fem reader

Warnings: None

Words: ~ 1,4 k

About: Still problems in paradise.

Part I II -> Next Part

7 missed calls from Atsumu Miya

3 new messages on your mailbox

25 new text messages from Atsumu Miya

"Looks like someone's really eager to talk to you," the taxi driver comments when your phone won't stop ringing, but you just snort and finally turn off your phone. "Seems like it, yeah." He raises an eyebrow at your resigned tone but tactfully keeps any further comments to himself, a gesture you appreciate at the moment.

Your whole body feels numb.

You're furious with Atsumu, that's certain. Part of you wants to confront him, ask how he could sink so low as to cheat on his girlfriend – heck, how he could marry you without telling her. Another part just feels sad and disappointed, just wanting to go back home and get some sleep, hoping things will seem better with time. Maybe you'll find out that all of this is just a bad joke, just a misunderstanding. Perhaps she's not his girlfriend – maybe she is someone who misunderstood that he's married and just had no idea that it's you. But why did she claim to have him in the palm of her hand?

You fight back tears and take a deep breath through your nose, thankfully almost home at this point. You won't try to reach out to him. Not after tonight. He'll either contact you tomorrow and explain everything, or you'll not see him again.

xxx

"He hasn't tried to contact you?" Yachi looks at you with sad puppy eyes while she applies a soft pink polish on her nails. You shake your head and hold your cup of tea a bit tighter. The TV quietly plays a movie in the background, something you two don't really focus on right now, especially not since you're finally talking about Atsumu.

"He called a few times during the night, but after that, nothing. Complete silence. I can't even see his profile picture anymore. I think he blocked me." You swallow the heavy lump in your throat at this words. He blocked you. Like you're some kind of obsessed fan or just a nuisance to him.

It's been a week now since it happened. You expected him to at least call again or maybe even visit your apartment after not seeing you for so long, but nothing. He hasn't bothered even giving you the slightest sign of life. But your heart clenched when you saw that he had updated his Instagram profile today with pictures of him at Onigiri Miya's – and you found the strawberry tiramisu that you both had shared the other day among the pictures, you just can't understand why he would do that.

Yachi closes the small lid and looks at you with anger coating her face while she carefully reaches for her phone. "I'll call Hinata and ask—"

"No!" You shake your head energetically, and Yachi lowers her hand. "Please don't bring him into it. It's embarrassing enough that I thought we had something going on." You bury your face in your hand and sigh, and Yachi quickly wraps her arms around you in a comforting way while making sure her fingers don't smudge her polish.

"I'm so sorry, Y/N. I never thought he was seeing someone. Hinata also had no idea, I guarantee it. He would have told me instantly if he knew. And Kageyama would have told me as well. They will give him an earful once they know."

You smile bitterly but still feel a bit better at the thought of cute sunshine Hinata yelling at Atsumu. "It's okay; it's not your fault. I'll forget about him. Just another year, and then I'll completely cut him out of my life."

You smile weakly, finally returning the hug with the mug still in your hand. It's time to forget about him. You'll see him in about a year, and that will be the last time. You'll make sure of that.

"Before I forget, Hinata asked if you received the cards for the Olympics match. You don't have to go, but if you want to, he'd be glad for you to come. He really likes you."

"I'll think about it. It's in a few weeks, right? I don't know if I want to see Atsumu so soon again. But maybe for some sort of closure?" You pull back and look at her with furrowed brows, and she nods at your words.

"I get it. But I'm still really disappointed in him. I really thought he's a good guy."

"Me too." You smile sadly, thinking about the pretty woman in the elevator, feeling a pang in your heart.

A part of you is still longing for him. He makes you feel good, he makes you feel desirable and beautiful. He makes you feel like you matter to him, like you're having a part of his heart. Yet, he hasn't told you about that woman, and it makes you feel dirty. The fact that he hasn't reached out after that night is enough to make you want to forget him and erase any foolish hope that this is just a misunderstanding. It's bitter reality.

You just need to make it clear to your heart that Atsumu Miya is no longer part of your life.

xxx

"Samu, she hates me."

"Yeah, and she has every reason to."

Osamu sighs as he watches Atsumu, a big pathetic clump of sadness practically lying on his counter. Atsumu is in no condition to drive home, and Osamu is well aware of that, already planning to drive to his apartment before he can finally go to his own bed. Since that incident a month ago, Atsumu has become unstable, getting drunk every other night, setting up a dangerous routine. Knowing he has an important match coming up doesn't stop him. Volleyball, always his top priority, now takes a back seat to his misery. Not even Bokuto can cheer him up, and Hinata is suspiciously avoiding him. He suspects Yachi finally told him what happened, though Hinata hasn't mentioned it.

"I even posted a pic of me being here tonight. She didn't come."

"You post pictures of being here almost every night. You can't tell me you expected her to come after parting like that? And you know that there's still the chance that she met her on her way downstairs." Atsumu sighs, slowly lifting his head at Osamu's sharp response. His face is red, eyes red-rimmed – a side effect of the alcohol. He looks horrible, and it actually pains Osamu to see him like this.

"Shut it. I'll call her. I got a new number today. I can call her now; I was just waiting for the right moment."

Osamu hesitates but decides it might be good for Atsumu to finally reach out, after being unable to do so during the past few weeks. Doubtful you'll answer, it's late after all, but maybe when you listen to the whole story and if Atsumu does a lot of groveling and explaining- then maybe you two still have a chance. Osamu still has no idea what kind of fate brought the two of you together, but he is certain that you'd make a great couple. If only his twin had a few more brain cells and a bit more luck.

Atsumu has finally managed to find your contact and started a call, which got directed to your mailbox after a few moments. He clears his throat and straightens his posture before he begins to talk, almost looking like his usual self.

"Y/N? It's me, Atsumu. I know it's been a while, but I'm sorry for everything. I couldn't call or text, but I miss you." He sighs and covers his eyes. "I miss you a lot, actually, I've been thinking about you every day ever since that night. I know it's all kind of messed up, but I can explain everything. Please, just let me. Please, y/n. I don't... don't want to lose you." Atsumu takes a deep breath and ends the call, his hands slightly shaky now.

"That was... corny." Osamu cringes, wiping the counter and putting Atsumu's beer aside.

"That's it – my last try of reaching out to her. If she's not answering, I'll just let her go." Atsumu's words are a bit slurred, but Osamu still gets it. He prays you'll listen – or else he'll be in trouble.

xxx

You wake up to a missed call and a message on your voicemail from an unknown number. Probably spam.

Without thinking twice, you delete the message.

[mimiscappinisideblog]

Me throughout 2020-2021-2022-2023:

Me the moment AO3 has been down for more than ten hours:

[wasabi-gumdrop]

oh

i am. unwell.

[weirdplutoprince]

Perhaps "fixed" would be a stretch but a girl can't help but think that a good PR team would have at least significantly improved Wei Wuxian's situation

[hua-liansimp]

the torture when you like a ship and you want to read fanfiction about that ship but you like the ship in a specific way and that way isn't the popular one:')

[liketheinferno2]

These aren't full ref sheets but I was trying to take some clear pictures of Hephaistos for later art reasons and then got side tracked doing all of the Pandaemonium bosses so here they are in order. Also for anyone following who doesn't play FFXIV and knows it as the catgirl game, enjoy this instead? VISUAL SPOILERS obviously.

Asphodelos

Warder of the Condemned: Erichthonios

Mythic Creation: The Hippokampos

Mythic Creation: The Phoinix

(+ familiars)

Hemitheos: Hesperos

(+ sexy fanfic redesign by Nemjiji)

To be brutally honest I never really liked either of these designs compared to every other Hemitheos we get, I think the really brutal black and red of the Phoinix is weakened by gold accents, but I still am always down for gay vampire surf rock. The Savage version kind of looks like Ultimalius as well if you've played XVI.

Abyssos

Mythic Creation: Proto-Carbuncle

Hrgrhhgrhrgrh

Hemitheos: Hegemone

^ My favourite detail on this is you can see the parasite's outlines in her robes and in her legs, then right through the eye holes on the mask to wrap around the torso. I'm convinced this version of Hegemone is functionally an ant being piloted by a cordyceps infection.

Hemitheos: Agdistis

She's very big

Perfect Imperfection: Hephaistos

I'm probably biased by Abyssos being the first raid I was there for day of release but these really are all fantastic. It's also when the story abandons all pretense of not being (at least partly) about family abuse and is loudly using the body horror and shackle motifs to talk about that. It's great. Hephaistos specifically is constantly bulging and twisting in and out of different forms like a highly unstable chimera and the more I look at these the more I notice parts that just should not be there. He's giving everything.

As for the Savage design It's a hard thing to rate as such but my favourite part is the veins that grow down from the eyeholes in his mask like bloody tears.

Thanks Abyssos I love you

Anabaseios

Mythic Creation: Kokytos

Dæmoniac Dungeon: Pandæmonium

It's really hard to communicate how huge this nasty tumor crab I zoomed out as far as physically possible in the game engine and subsequently ended up at a goofy angle staring up his nose.

Ephemeral Justice: Themis

Best boy. The double ended lance and second pair of arms are fantastic for this character.

Theos: Athena

In.. almost every final fantasy adventure you're fighting the real villain not at the very end but a little beforehand, the big iconic end boss is often more a metaphorical figure representing everything wrong with that first person's ideals. Athena cut out the middle man and became her own JENOVA.

I do like the moth angel, especially the hollow body full of dubious orbs, but with her eyes closed all the time it gives off the impression of this not even being the true body but some kind of anglerfish lure in the shape of a fairy... which might be true because this exists:

I really really love her twitchy anemone feelers and how the moth body ends up grafted to the rest of it waist down.

Anyway there's the gang I did not specifically intend for this to be design reviews I just wanted to have clear photos because when you actually see them in game there's other things to focus on. In hindsight I can appreciate more the theming of each tier and then the series as a whole, but my only (extremely obvious) observation for now is that every character Athena had a personal hold over is decorated in chains somehow and so I should have seen the Hegemone thing coming lmao. Heph and Aggy are still my favourites I don't think that's changing any time soon. I'm also noticing that Anabaseios is now just old enough for random DF parties to fuck up severely and I find that fun so I'm going to go fight the crab mansion now.

[rendevok]

twitter fluff requests! 💞

[samuraijacksoff]

HELLO i have finally finished putting together a little book of cross stitch patterns made w minecraft. for free on Internet Archive !! :)

[kenobion]

Andrew Garfield for Audible UK

[sysig]

Light and darkness, but mostly darkness (Patreon)

[faxxmodem]

tbh without eric matthews being a bog-standard shitty cop like. nothing that happened in the course of the saw movies would have happened

if he doesn't frame amanda on drug charges then she never goes to prison, never becomes addicted, never pushes cecil to go through with the robbery that ends in jill's miscarriage

john's terminal cancer is inevitable but without gideons death he has his family and he has a reason to persevere. probably still a classist bootstrappy kind of guy, probably still resentful of those that he thinks don't appreciate their lives, probably not the leader of a small torture cult

and i don't say this to strip amanda or anyone else in the universe of responsibility for their actions, just to appreciate how this reflects the ways the carceral system can radically derail someone's life and create entire networks of suffering

[intheholler]

I'm a many-many-generations-Appalachian, and when I was a teenager, everyone assumed I'd leave, so I thought I should. And then when I did leave, someone called my mama and told her I was the most homesick child they'd seen in decades, that she should come get me. She didn't, because she wanted me to succeed that badly, but I got myself back to Appalachia PDQ. And then I never left again, because Appalachia is where I belong.

I know the stereotypes, but we can be happy here, too. I've got a good life, with a well-paying job I love, a silver anniversary spouse, wonderful children, and a nice house. My mama lives with us and that's just how we like it. Our quietly queer little family is proud to be Appalachian, and our children learn our history, like the recorded story from their great-grandfather who saw the Baldwin-Felts get off the train in Matewan.

Are there problems in Appalachia? Sure. But that doesn't mean we are all living in misery. Appalachian lives are more than poverty porn and strip mines and drugs and Dew mouth. We have our own festivals and music and art and foods and books to celebrate our shared heritage. We have our own holidays, too, like the first day of deer season. There can be a lot of joy in our Appalachian lives, if we let it.

And of course, we can all join together to remind folks that #heaintfromaroundhere ;)

.

[catocappuccino]

He got a sweater WITH A DOG ON IT?! So happy and joyous

[petrichoravellichor]

I have come to the deeply unfortunate conclusion that being a member of the Supernatural fandom is a lot like being a hunter: no matter how many times you try to walk away from The Life™, it just keeps on pulling you right back in

[our-inspire-verse]

I always feel so out of place even in system communities. Does anyone else relate at all??

Like, idk some system memes are cool and relatable bc obviously not everything is gonna line up, but so much of it doesn't click with us.

We've almost never been put off by the voices, we all wanna communicate, we don't think less of each other or think 1 deserves more front time than anyone else, etc. Idk, there's so many memes about denial and eating each other's food and all this distress. Which is i know, a major part of many system's lives. Part of what makes a meme is the repeatability and a lot of systemhood IS struggles in that area.

But what about systems who do everything right (in the sense that we have healthy coping and such)? What about systems who unconditionally love each other and dissociative barriers are something we work around instead of fighting? What about the systems who love the voices?

[zeb-z]

I just think Tallulah gets to be upset about this. “It’s not Wilbur’s fault” “He’s not a bad dad” “He loves his daughter so much” yes! These are all true! And it’s not his fault! But he’s still not there. And Tallulah has gone through so much and still hasn’t seen him, the one time he was around was the one time she wasn’t, and all she has are letters and “I’m thinking of you always” and things that used to be theirs together, but he’s still not there. She’s waited and she’s been patient and she’s loved him all the same, and he’s still not there. Like yesterday, and the day before, and the day before, from the happy milestones to the traumatic events, he’s still not there.

She knows that it’s not his fault, but it doesn’t change the fact that he’s absent. That in and of itself just adds to the sorrow, because she knows why he’s gone, and she’s been told time and time again it doesn’t mean he doesn’t care, she knows this - it doesn’t mean it doesn’t sting, that it doesn’t hurt, that she doesn’t yearn for her father to be there more than anything in the world, and he’s just not there.

So yes, she gets to be upset, and be caustic, and stomp her feet and write bitter messages, and be angry and vitriolic, because she’s a little girl missing her father, who feels things with her whole heart and soul - and that means she gets to feel the ugly parts of it, too.