Tumgik
#they pay offs were so worth it!
ramblingguy54 · 2 years
Text
     There’s a lot to be said, regarding how Thanks To Them handled what it managed to do in under almost an hour quite well, but what I specifically want to focus on is the colossal amount of emotional weight it gave in-depth for Luz & Camila’s relationship because holy shit it was great, overall. In the past, I’ve seen posts here and there attempt to slam Camila as a parent calling her irresponsible or outright manipulative in the way she wanted to balance Luz’s creativity or that knee jerk reaction at Yesterday’s Lie concluding on a somber conversation between these two. Some were quick to peg Camila as being dismissing of her daughter choosing to stay on the Boiling Isles, when in reality she was merely concerned for Luz’s safety and not to mention questioning her abilities to be a competent parent in all of this, as well.
    Thanks To Them fully puts into perspective just how rough Camila has had it as a single parent. It wasn’t just losing her husband that was painful, but also the consistent berating Luz would get from onlookers passive aggressively judging her antics, which were heavily implied to have been inspired by Manny. He seems to have been apparently a very silly father figure that wanted to inspire his daughter about vibrant imagination, hence that Azura book being the last thing he gave her before passed away, due to unfortunate health issues of some kind. Honestly, I know I sound like a broken record here, but I can’t further reinforce my point enough on these impressive ways the Owl House crew managed to salvage all this insightful characterization around the Noceda family tree. It masterfully makes any moment from Luz’s creativity throughout this series run have such deeper meaning. She was trying to keep her father’s faith alive and that can be said for a lot what Luz has done through compassion.
Tumblr media
     Went from simply loving Camila’s character to absolutely seeing myself in the way she struggles to stand up for Luz’s nature as a human being. Manny may be gone, but she doesn’t let that grief stop her from allowing Luz to live life the way her kid wants. The notion of parenthood comes in and out of my head often about how I would fair in the department of being a father. Would I make the right choices for my child? Could I prevent the same unfortunate stuff I went through not repeat for their new life? Camila was dealt an unfair hand by life and desires to give Luz a place she can call home. It’s why she sent Luz off in the first place to that camp at this story’s beginning. She never wanted Luz to do a 180 in personality, or stop having an imagination that makes her a vibrant child. Camilia’s main goal in all of this was to prevent Luz’s bullying at school from potentially increasing, the more she took her antics further.
     This in of itself portrays the issues of our education system with how it views other peoples’ learning capabilities. Attempting to put a label it all as grief for Luz’s acting out in their assignments, given Manny’s passing, is only a half truth severely exaggerated. Sure, losing her Dad had a huge profound change in Luz, but even when Manny was alive she has always done things differently. If anything, Manny’s sudden passing made Luz double down on the way she views things in general determined to stand up proudly for it, regardless of what anyone said. Luz was paying her respects to Manny, by living her life without regret. In this regard, it makes sense why Luz goes to such great lengths in trying to fix any mistake she feels accountability for whether it’s unintentionally helping Belos’ plans through time travel, regret for not coming home to Camila sooner, or Amity, Gus, and Willow being stranded from their respective reality.
    Luz’s compassionate nature is her strongest endearing trait and weakness all at once because while she is caring to others, it comes at the expense of her self-esteem. She blows any mistake big or small out of massive proportions. Part of me can’t help but think Manny’s passing plays a role in this, too. Luz is devoted to the memory her father so much that she weighs these mistakes on the grounds of, “What would my father think, if he knew about my own actions?”, and it is leading her down self-destructive tendencies. This was likely going through her mind, besides Camila’s advice about learning from mistakes.
Tumblr media
     Luz wasn’t using fiction as a way to escape her father’s passing. It was all about keeping the memory of his own unique personality alive. To show others applying your different touch to learning about anything can pay off. It makes Luz Noceda such a compelling and endearing protagonist, in spite of how rough she has had everything in childhood to the Boiling Isles conflict currently. Luz wishes to do right by Camila & Manny’s beliefs that it consumes her with overwhelming grief. You could feel so much of it in her reluctant resolve to stay behind forever. At this point, Luz has felt like everything she has wanted ended in failure. Wanted do well in school with grades at the top of her class.
Didn’t want Camila to worry about her well being all the time.
Wanted so desperately to become of apart of the Boiling Isles and share this world with her mother acknowledging it.
Wants to live a life with no regrets, like her father wanted.
     All of this resolve has come crashing down on Luz’s determination. She can’t live a life without regret because Luz is consumed by so much of it. The only way Luz believed she could atone is by robbing herself of any true happiness. This way the karmic value of what she had blamed herself for would even out. It’s absolutely heartbreaking seeing such an optimistic kid become utterly broken by these circumstances. Luz may hate Belos, but she in turn despises herself because of being fooled by his scummy tactics to achieve his goal. Throwing everything into chaotic terror when the Collector was freed finally by King.
Tumblr media
     Luz & Camila’s development was easily one of my favorite parts from the whole special. Thanks To Them is an all around great start to this three part series finale in general, but their emotional development was a serious stand out. This was the kind of stuff I wanted to see more of in DuckTales 2017 between Della & Louie with their chemistry and am so happy to see the concept thoroughly explored here. Loved what was shown off and can’t wait to see the last two specials in 2023. Welcome back Owl House. It’s good to see you again.
84 notes · View notes
puppyeared · 4 months
Text
i wrote this as a joke because I wanted to strangle a guy watching tiktoks without headphones on the bus, but im genuinely disturbed that we've gotten to a point where convenience comes first. and it depresses me even more that its used to justify and monetize greed
#like we have so many ways of doing things that could help us in the long run but because we're told it requires more work we just cant#its too resource intensive. or maybe its too much to maintain. we have to overlook benefits so money can go into more important things#we teach each other to do things a certain way so it works for everyone but who was it convenient for first? what abt who it might hurt?#i have to wonder if the rules our current system uses is worth listening to or following if it doesnt have our best interests in mind. u an#me and the ppl around us.. would we be better off if i ate my meals knowing the person who grew it wanted to feed others the way they could#feed themselves? and that isnt to say we're going to be happy doing it but i guess satisfied that its helping someone instead of quietly#accepting that itll eventually go in the dumpster behind a grocery store because it stopped looking appetizing or it wasnt on sale anymore#what about building homes so we can shelter each other? what if we were satisfied with what we did because we knew it would be paid back#with kindness? isnt that what we evolved to do?? heal each others bones and tell stories and help each other??#why dont houses come with solar panels or generators unless we find a way to make people pay to use the sun? why is our pooled money used#to fund genocides instead of education and hospitals? whose interests and convenience came first when we started this??#i wont pretend to know the answer because i dont. but we all know we're miserable and im sorry to say that i cant see myself fighting#for a world that wont fight for me too. why do we work if we cant live from it?? why did they stop us from plucking more teeth from our#bosses until they could build more walls around themselves and then go back to underpaying us??#im so tired. i cant even imagine making it to age 70#yapping#vent
76 notes · View notes
dairyfreenugget · 30 days
Text
(Going insane boinkinh one AU in my head)
Hey hey hey
May I interest you in
(Slowly slides my FaaF AU towards you but void just Disappears without a trace one day before the accolade)
Teehee
#thylacines can talk#faaf au#i love this au very yummy. a very fun twist on how Flower's dynamic with their parents would progress afterwards#the vessels live but the void exits their bodies in quite a violent manner (extreme pain and literally throwing up an entire person worth of#void). Flower was on guard duty and theyre found barely conscious in a pool of rapidly evaporating void. passes out seconds later#PK also had the displeasure of experiencing extene pain and burning as void forced its way out through his skin <3 And his moulds all melted#and evaporated. after the initial shock wears off theyre hit with “Oh No#the vessel“ and rush to find them. Well somebody else was already looking for the royal pair about this#Flower wakes up dazed and in pain in their father's workshop. their stomach hurts their throat burns and they feel lightheaded. the entire#place is considerably brighter than they remember and in they can hear two faint voices in the background but theyre too preoccupied with#examining their now pure white hand in shock to focus on anything else. until they hear their mother say “My wyrm they're awake” and#suddenly their parents are by their side. Now the two have no idea what void leaving their body might have done to them. Are they still#hollow? are they still dead? do they understand anything are they sentient? or was what was done pernament even without the void? do they#have the mind of a child if their sentience was restored? or do they remember anything? So WL stays by their side and helps them sit up#while their father goes to grab his tools. She's trying to keep them calm and comfort them but theyre still too disoriented to pay her much#attention. Until their father checks their breathing and they yelp audibly from the cool metal contacting their skin and suddenly they seem#much more alert. theyve never experienced true coldness before. PK quickly apologises and tries to be gentler with them. Theyre breathing#properly and they have a heartbeat. And he just pauses for a long while just. listening to their heart beating. Many emotions to be had#after the exam's over he asks them point blank how theyre feeling. And Flower looks up at him still seeming a little disoriented. and then#they lower their hand to their stomach and mutter 'My tummy hurts...a-and my throat burns'. It's to be expected after the way the void#left their body. so he goes to grab them some water and meds and they also ask for food and a mirror. And after he returns they just stare#at themself in the mirror and pull on their bangs for a while then blurt out 'I have your eyes' when PK asks if everything's okay. And he#and he almost chokes up as he replies 'Yeah...Yeah you do'. Flower eventually spins a lie that they remember everything but its all distant#and blurry. Like they were not aware until now. They figured it'd be better to not break their hearts#And now the three have to figure out how to be a family while PK is also scrambling to find a new solution to the infection#oops i meant to only give a brief rundown in the tags which is why it was in the tags. but i got too invested KDHDKFB
10 notes · View notes
madamescarlette · 10 months
Text
💐
#shocked with myself (maybe pleasantly surprised? is the right phrase)#at actually liking barbie a great deal more than i had prepared myself to#it was just a lot more sincere than i had expected; i was afraid it wouldn't be/be more on the snarky side of cinema lately#but it was strangely so much more heartfelt than that#of course some points felt rushed/too on the nose#but the girls and ryan gosling made me so happy#and her at the end saying (spoilers obvs) that yes YES she does want to take life by the hand and pay the price to live and live#also as a former representative of unrequited love the throughline felt a lot gentler than i was prepared for it to be#it was a lot more about emotion and the joy of growing up and growing old than i expected#i don't necessarily think its heart is as pure as a truly great movie??#but it didn't laugh AT you. it made you laugh and it also meant what it said#which idk idk in a sea of endless winks at the camera laughing obnoxiously loudly media i appreciated the at least#wanting to live and live well aspect of it all and how it took that seriously#like someone on my dash said. i don't really know if it was a good movie?? but the borders of my mind are stretched#something in me is dreaming because of it. so i think that at least is worth it all#also all the girls in the theater laughing their heads off did something to me!!!#there were countless friends (including mine) decked out in pink and it was so so so sweet to me#(anyway. you didn't need these thoughts and maybe I'll retract it later when I've come down from the high of hugging both my buddies)
25 notes · View notes
polyamorouspunk · 8 days
Note
MRI is finished! It wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it was gonna be. The worst part was getting an IV, and that's just cause I have deep veins. And they let me listen to rock hits inside the machine too :3 overall a good experience
-🫐
Oh god I didn’t know there was an IV involved 🤮 nevermind I don’t need an MRI
3 notes · View notes
be-good-to-bugs · 19 days
Text
i need to stop staying up so late when i need to work the next day augggg
#the bin#i work at 11am at least so i do still have awhile till i need to get up#usually i work 4 hours earlier so im lucky i guess. not exactly tho bc i much prefer morning shifts but whatevs#i texted my sister today to ask if she can come this weekend but she didnt respond. hhh. im gonna be so mad if she says no#i just realized im abt to be out of cat food too so she HAS to comw at some point soon#it doenst even have to be the weekend. thats just the days she has off but if she can stop by anotehr time then thats fine#or if just her boyfriend can come drop stuff off and pickup her card then thats fine. but idk. i even offered to lend her gas money if my#next paycheck is enough to allow that. i shoudo get it tomorrow or the day afeyr so. well. hhhh.#i hope my paycheck isnt too bad. i think tips were pretty good recently so. maybe it wond be so bad. hhhh.#im tired of being stressed abt this stuff all the time. im really pissed at my sister rn too bc she just bought $40 worth of unnecessary#stuff. like. decor. while she still owes me $300 which i only lent bc it was for rent and i knew i wouldnt need it back for almost a month#but its been that time now and i need it back and instead of sensing it back she buys a $20 wall tapestry apparently#hhh. last yime i ever ever ever lend her money. im only gonna lend gas money bc i need her here soon. but she also needs to amde the trip#bc she has a card here to pickup. and theres several other reasons shes supposed to stop by. it shouldnt have to be my responsibility to#pay for that trip. hhhh.#im so glad i wont have to deal with her in a month
2 notes · View notes
hella1975 · 1 year
Text
i don’t think my mum appreciates my bargain hunting
Tumblr media
23 notes · View notes
yourheartinyourmouth · 2 months
Text
being the only person you know who is struggling is so fucking humiliating.
we’re talking about getting me a job at a gas station. my friends all make $60K plus.
i have to work in a gas station.
2 notes · View notes
the-trans-dragon · 1 year
Text
Hello "use Firefox" entities. If anyone would have fun expanding upon the suggestion, my phone came with like 20 google apps and I would prefer to have 0. I'm doubt that is 100% possible because there are very few default programs. Example: no default calender or photo app--just google calendar and google photo. But good lord there are too many of them
Is there a "use Firefox" suggestion for email/calendar/map/file viewer/anything?
<3
#i almost got a plain flip phone to avoid Advertisements but the cheapest was like....$100.... so i got a $200 smartphone and its#moderately adequate. i am still figuring out how to answer calls. you swipe to do it but if you dont swipe with a specific velocity it just#wiggles things around. im not sure how im supposed to lock my phone bc the lock button is also the “reads your fingerprint and unlocks your#phone“ button. so ill lock it and then it immediately registers my finger (which i need to use to press the button to lock it???) and then#it unlocks.#humans are not designed for this. we are crafty and clever and cunning but this is beyond my established skill#i miss my first “phone.” everything customizable. app. font. brightness. scheduled volume changes to silence my phone#during school hours. keybind any key to anything. double-press volume-down to pause audio without looking#i had a “swipe down menu” before they were default :3 i picked exactly which options i wanted in it. i remember my first#real phone had the swipe down menu. i was kinda mad because i knew the original designers and programmers hadnt been#compensated. it was open software. but its different when apple uses the programming in hundreds of billions of dollars worth of products.#gah and then they took SOME of the ideas and locked them behind subscriptions 🙄 like when youtube decided that you#had to pay for Youtube Plus or it pauses media if you turn off the screen. why does this app even know if my phone is locked or unlocked?#its annoying... i stay very far away from any work-arounds that could have consequences. so im stuck hopping#from newly-found method to the next. they vanish as soon as the wrong person discovers it and someone codes it out of existence#i love my little mp3player. no wifi. no bluetooth. no google. the few features it has require non-intuitive button pressing.#but....no ads. just music. purchased music! no subscription. it has a headphone jack. fits in my palm. the exterior isnt glass lol.#wow sorry i am raaaambling. oh well. its my post lol.#sorenhoots
8 notes · View notes
welldonekhushi · 1 year
Text
I had the opportunity to experience Comic Con for the first time in my place today! My college hosted this trip so I went there with my friends and I enjoyed it so so much!
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Got to see many things — let it be merchandise, cosplayers, games.. everything! ✨
AND GUESS WHICH COSPLAY LEFT ME SHOOK??!! I SAW SOMEONE COSPLAYING GHOST AND I NEVER SCREAMED SO HARD IN MY LIFE 🥹✨
I was really hoping to see a CoD cosplay in the comic con once I enter and FINALLY, I got to click a photo with them,, the rest were anime-related but it's fine 😭
STILL, I HAD SO MUCH FUN! I hope I'll find time to visit it again 🥺💕✨
20 notes · View notes
Photo
Tumblr media
is this actually that uncommon? I don’t even unpack just the DAY I return from somewhere, but it’s literally the first thing I do. I do nothing else until I’m unpacked, I have everything organized back in it’s proper place in the house within an hour of getting home lol.. I thought this was typical??? What’s the cultural norm?
#same with groceries or anything else I;m bringing home from outside -  i put it away or d o soemthing with it immediately#I just don't like looming tasks in the background taking up my mental space like 'oh i still have to do that later' etc.#I can't relax until everything is taken care of. If i try to relax or rest when I just got home from a trip there's just always the nagging#sense that I'm going to have to get up and do something else LATER (put the stuff away) so why not just do it now#It's the whole principle of 'be more uncomfortable in the present in order to help yourself in the future'#Samme thing with covid like. Follow the social distancting tules and wear masks and do everything extremely dillignently NOW no matter how#annoying or inconvenient it is at the MOMENT because the future pay off will save you more discomfort later (more vairants coming out - long#er lockdowsn because of wider spread - you or your family getting sick - etc.)#I am ALWAYS willing to inconvenence myself and ''suffer'' temporarily in the present if it will help my future self or get me a larger#benefit down the line. etc. etc. But to me that just seems like.. literally the only rational thing to do#what's more important? my temporary emotional satisfaction or my long term wellbeing ? always the long term#it might feel good to just come home and flop onto the floor and shove the suitcases aside but is that like hour or so of rest worth#the annoyance later when you realize you've still got to put everyhting up and now you REALLY don't feel like it and etc. etc. ?#just save your future self the trouble and get it out of the way#But again I just thought it's like... everyone would also do that??? If not then when do you unpack? days later???#Kind of like how in childhood I still had a lot of issues (hadn't developed cognitive empathy really at all - no affective empathy - don't u#nderstand social cues well or people at all - etc.. which is a recipe for frustration when Living In A Society since people are always#doing things you don't understand and you struggle to communicate properly or be understood like everyone's just speaking a different langua#ge than you) and worse anger problems and there were a few times I would come home from shcool or something and just freak out and#knock my shelves in my room over and break things or etc - and it's like OKAY that feels fine in the moment but.. consider the aftermath!#now I have to spend like a whole fucking hour cleaning my room and putting everyhting back together and etc. etc. and it's like a negative#feeling on top of a negative feeling. not only am I still kind of mad but now I have EXTRA work to do when I just want to go to sleep#So in a more minor way it's the same thing like.. If I feel shitty from traveling I don't want to DOUBLE the shitty by having extra stuff to#do later and some task looming over my head. I want to get all the bad out of the way first so I can just have uninterrupted peace later lol#if that makes sense? idk lol#The one exception is once recently I had been somewhere and got legit heat exhaustion and was throwing up by the time I got home so#I didn't unpack everything then. But after cooling off and having pedilyte and stuff I still shakily unpacked before I went to bed lol
22 notes · View notes
notjanine · 10 months
Text
i’ve submitted well over 50 job applications this summer. tell me why the one (1) position i’ve made the most progress toward is one i didn’t even apply for???* and THEN. yesterday. one of my preceptors from the internship i just finished emailed me out of the blue like Hey i'm gonna have an open position at my private practice soon, are you interested?** girl what the fuck is going on here***
#* i was interviewing for a part time gig and halfway thru guy was was like Oh we also have this totally different position you might like!!#(i'm two interviews in and it's got big pros and cons but it's full time with salary good benefits and great opportunities#but the job itself is not exactly my bag#but it also def wouldn't be a long term thing#the woman from the second interview said she'd have one of the current RDs in that role give me a call so i can ask more questions ab it)#** honestly a great opportunity but two things give me pause:#1. i really enjoyed my time with that rotation and my preceptor was SO kind and lovely but#it seemed like we were just communicating on different wavelengths. like i'd ask a question and then she'd give me an irrelevant answer.#she'd give me an assignment and it would take me two or three tries to get what she wanted.#it was all just slightly off. but maybe that's ok bc i wouldn't be doing ASSIGNMENTS if i worked for her. i would be seeing clients#and 2. the pay is weirdly not good. like SIGNIFICANTLY less than comparable listings i've seen#but i applied for all those and got rejected bc i don't have experience lol so maybe it'd be worth it for a little while#just to get my foot in the door#and i think it would be very flexible and i would start off with a small case load anyway so maybe i could just do it part time#while i do something else full time#bc tbh i also want to work as much as i can (without burning out) while i'm here in tx to take advantage of the lack of state income tax#and lbr if i learned anything from my internship experience it's that i hate being bored and i like variety#how great would it be to bounce between like inpatient acute care and outpatient counseling constantly. keep this brain ENGAGED!#*** the gatekeeping in this profession is unfuckingreal#like i KNEW this profession in particular was too much about ~networking~ and ~who you know~ but#i didn't think it would be this fucking bad
4 notes · View notes
maddy-ferguson · 10 months
Note
Sick of getting called homophobic for not enjoying or shipping byler. Sorry but will stans are right for not shipping him with a guy who said his life started the day he disappeared. There is no enjoyement here aside from supporting it to piss off actual homophobes. The ship itself sucks ass.
you're so funny for sending this to me like am i supposed to agree that it sucks😭😭 but yeah i know what you mean like are people not allowed to dislike a ship anymore as long as you're not being weird it's literally fine it's A STRANGER THINGS SHIP
#people were like no this is terrible why would they do this to will i kinda hate mike now after volume 2 so they literally KNOW#it's not for everyone and like. a lot of bylers who are will stans' tweets and posts read like they don't even like what's happening that#much since their mike is like...a different mike sometimes or is portrayed as not good enough for will and not as someone who was#struggling too. idk. i feel like you have more to gain from being a byler if you're a mike stan than you do if you're a will stan which#sounds weird bc i just said that a lot of people are always like mike sucks will is the bestest ever but like. if you watch the show its#definitely mike who has the upper hand and who's 'making will suffer' even though he's suffering too if you think he's gay too which i#obviously do. but it means that you have to accept that and like that this is the story for will and a lot of bylers who are will stans#(even mike stans tbh) simply don't! so being like no i don't like this anymore because will's my favorite and the idea of it paying off#eventually doesn't make it worth it to me is like...very normal behavior lol#and when i say mike stans have more to gain i don't mean that mike has more to gain from the relationship. in universe at least (like no#omgg mike you are such a lame person how did you pull will)#because for us as a character he gets depth and an oh mike hasn't had nothing going on for two seasons plot twist. which is always fun#does that make sense#ask
4 notes · View notes
karasimpno · 1 year
Text
Top ten biggest anime betrayals just happened to me
6 notes · View notes
sick-as-a-dog · 9 months
Text
×
#guess whos sis might be pissed off at them despite me begging for help and explaining that im struggling and in pain#nobody gives a shit about me and my needs do they i never ficmong asked for his bullshit it wasnt supposed to he like this#stepsis promised she wouldnt flake but that stupid fuckong asshole hasnt responded to any messages im so done#she hasnt payed me for taking care of her cat AT ALL even tho ive been holding her for longer than was agreed on#it was supposed to be a simple job only take care of them until they were weaned and rehomed#she was supposed to get her cat aleady she keeps saying she has homes for them and changing her mind why the fuck is she doing this shit#plus the damn cat chewed my headphones in half so she owes me a new pair but i fuckong know she wont pay that back#tempted to rehome her cat since she ONLY asks for kitten pics and doesnt contact me for anything else not even to check in on her cat#im so fucking tired and done with everything especially since its gotten so much worse since the toe infection#i tried and tried and tried and tried and tried and tried and tried and tried and tried and tried and tried and tried and tried and failed#and now moving at all is pure suffering so i definitely cant keep up cleaning after her asshole cat who apparently likes to shit everywhere#im tempted to hunt that stupid bitch down and force her to clean up every mess her fuckong cat made im so fuckong done with everything#doenst help i barly have any ebergy eber since he doent wanna be maets anynore xant even eat or sleep mucj cnat even love rogjy#so tired so pain juat eanna die i cant keep this shit up nothing is worth living for anymore tbh and now my sis is gonna make me feel worse#im going to lose my own cats befause of that atupid shitstain of a stepsister and uer cat im going to fuinkig vomit and kill so dnoe
1 note · View note
samwisefamgee · 1 year
Text
how does this week keep getting worse wtf
#this is. so fucking unbearable#the tinnitus makes me want to blow my fucking brains out i dont know why it got so much violently worse so fast#but i guess its like this forever now! and it only gets worse!#i thought id be able to deal with it but if it gets this much worse at this rate im so fuxking dead lol this is insanity#i cant take it on top of everything everything EVERYTHING else if god wants me dead this fucking bad she'll get it#life hasnt been worth it for 12 fucking years it CERTAINLY isnt worth it now that im blinder balder in more.pain and.crazier than ever#and the tinnitus makes the screaming in my head eternal#girl theres no point it just hurts to be alive#i cant pay to fix a single one of my problems and ill need tens of thousands of dollars to even kind of fix all of them#i never got to start my life#i never will. not as the person i was. or ever wanted to be. or even close. ive physically and mentally lost too much to do what id planned#and now i cant even live in peace normally even if i were able to 'fix' everything so much of this is permanent and degenerative#spent 24 years giving everything to my family and they returned the favor by leaving me in a rotting box to die and i let it work lol#only took abouy a year and a half too#my dad's family killed off their mentally ill youngest of six WAY faster than it took em to get to me so i guess they got rusty#anyway i love when the all consuming despair comes back im gonna go cry for a bit and hopefully fall back to sleep
2 notes · View notes