#this had no business being as funny as it was

[sunrizef1]

What happens in Vegas pt 12

Pairing: Charles Leclerc x fem!driver!reader

Warnings: Cursing, briefly mentioned puke (referenced), panic attacks (referenced), the NFL

Authors note: wanted to get this out before the race tomorrow, I actually quite like this chapter

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yourusername

📍Austin, TX

liked by logansargeant charles_leclerc16 and 2,309,099 others

yourusername happy to be back in Austin, ready to recharge 🔋

Tagged: logansargeant, l/nranch

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user1 the speed with which she left china is honestly so funny

user2 the race was two days ago why’s she already in America 😭

user3 why’s she at a farm???

user4 her grandpas family got rich by owning a really successful agricultural company so both her grandparents decided to buy a ranch outside of Austin, which is where y/n grew up

user5 her dad being English always throws me off when I think about her family tbh

user6 her grandpa went to a race once and made the joke that the Americanism skipped a generation lol

user7 wait I’m new to y/n, how’s her dad English but the rest of her family’s American?

user8 her grandparents were based in England when he was born but they ended up really busy so they sent him to a boarding school from the time he was really young, hence the accent

user9 they’re so confusing 😭

user10 my favorite cowgirl

user11 she couldn’t wait till cota to go home???

logansargeant your grandma likes me more than you

yourusername no she doesn’t

user12 I didn’t know Logan went with her

user13 where’s Charles???

yourusername added to their story

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yourusername added to their story

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yourusername

📍Las Vegas, NV

liked by killatrav taylorswift13 and 3,980,756 others

yourusername had a great time at the @/patrickmahomes charity golf gala this weekend! Grateful for the opportunity to show all these boys how it’s done out on the green and support charity at the same time! ⛳️

Might have to get you a different hat though 😉 @/killatrav

Tagged: logansargeant, killatrav, patrickmahomes

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user14 are those Porsche golf balls!?!?

user15 THEY EAT SO HARD

logansargeant I 100% beat you

yourusername I was 5 under par. You were 5 over. You lost.

logansargeant ☹️

user16 what a crossover

killatrav don’t hate the player, hate the game 🤷‍♂️

yourusername i dont hate the game, I just hate alpine

pierregasly ???

yourusername see you next week, Frenchie

user17 her and Pierres fake beef is genuinely so funny to me

user18 where's Charlesssss

user19 he liked the post, at least

user20 omg they're in Vegas! Remember what happened last time they were in Vegas…

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yourusername

📍Bellagio Hotel & Casino, Las Vegas

liked by charles_leclerc16 donnakelce and 6,989,870 others

yourusername Last night out in Vegas 😵‍💫

I'm, once again, honored to have been invited to the 15 and the Mahomies Charity Gala! Got to auction off a few paddock passes and also got to spend a great night out with friends!

Thanks so much Vegas, you were a lot better this time than you were last time.

Tagged: logansargeant, taylorswift13, killatrav, patrickmahomes, charles_leclerc16

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user21 CHARLES CONTENT?!?!

user22 she seems happier than she has before

user23 Logan and Taylor swift in the same room is not something I’d ever expect tbh

patrickmahomes thanks for coming! ❤️💛

yourusername thanks for inviting us! ❤️🖤

user24 this is just so American

taylorswift13 🫶

yourusername 🫶

user25 more Logan content this week than Williams gives in a month

user26 they’ve been to like three different states already lmao

user27 I need the home field advantage from Miami for these two this weekend

logansargeant I’m so tired

yourusername at least it was fun 🤷‍♀️

logansargeant lol, it definitely was

user28 the first pic is so sibling coded

user29 “Mon ange” CHARLESSS 🥹

user30 the fact he’s tagged on the messages 😭

user31 THE LAST LINE ABOUT VEGAS?!?! IM SCREAMING!!!

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[angel5ofp0rn]

PT 1 / PT 3 😋

ExHusband!Price x f!reader

more fluffy this time heh 🙂‍↕️

just Price being a dad

*haven’t proofread :-(

You wake up in John’s arms. Your heads are at the foot of the bed, and your feet near the head.

Last night didn’t stop at one time.

Of course not.

How could you two just hook up once when you’re the only ones who know each other’s bodies the way you do?

When you’ve gone two years without someone knowing worshiping your body just the way you like it?

You slowly remove John’s arm from where it was hugged your bare waist so you could sit up and stretch a bit.

God, you were sore.

You could hear the faint sound of John’s soft snoring from behind you as he laid there, still asleep.

Even in this moment of post-hookup clarity, you’re just still so connected to his presence in a way that you can hardly understand.

You lean down and kiss his cheek, your lips brushing against his prickly stubble.

You don’t know how things are going to be when he wakes, so you’ll take what you can get for now.

He lets out a small grunt as you kiss his cheek, and his body begin to shift slightly.

He’s waking up, and you know that it’s any moment before his eyes are on you again, and God knows what will happen then…

John’s eyes open.

You’re holding your breath.

His sleepy eyes still hold that same level of passion that they had last night, and your own glance back at him is just the same.

The intensity that’s in the air between you is only growing, only getting more potent, in a way that neither of you would like to let go of just yet.

“Hey.” You smile a little bit, your voice still soft and sleepy.

“G’mornin’.” He looks up at the soft smile on your face, matching it with his own lazy smirk. His gaze soon drifts back to your neck and the hickey he knows is still there.

Your eyes flicker down to his neck as well, seeing the matching mark you left on his throat.

“I should get the kids up soon.” You sigh softly. “You should… get dressed, and get to the couch. I don’t want to confuse them.”

John nods, getting up from the bed to find his clothes. The realization that this really has to end soon sinking in.

“Gonna be honest, love. Wish it didn’t have to be like this.”

You tilt your head to the side a bit. “What would you prefer, Johnathan?”

You smirk a tiny little bit as you call him by his full name; you used to do that to bug him when you were married.

He shakes his head, a breathy chuckle at how you’ve reverted to his full name now. It was always funny just how much that used to annoy him.

“I’d prefer jus’ to pick up where we left off.”

This time he lets the silence hang for a while, not bothering to fill it in. Both of you knew how complicated things were. Neither one of you wanted to be the one to acknowledge it.

Until you do.

“Where we left off was an ugly, screaming, crying argument.” You try not to sound too sour as you recall this.

John looks down as he hears this, trying to seem more busy with buttoning his jeans instead of acknowledging just how true that statement was.

The memory of that argument between the two of you was fresh in his mind as you brought it back up. He couldn’t argue with you, your point, or even the sour tone you had in your voice. You were right.

“And we didn’t fight. That was our rule.” You remind him of the severity of your last fight.

“I know.” John sighs, a hand now rubbing over his beard, not bothering to argue or deflect.

The rule had always been to never fight. To talk everything out. To work through your problems in a civilized manner. But that last time, that last night, things got too out of hand.

He wasn’t proud of the way things ended.

You wipe your eyes, not realizing that you were starting to feel those intense emotions again, two years later.

You announce that you’re going to shower and then get the kids up, that John needs to get back downstairs to the couch.

After your shower, you get dressed and go to your youngest child’s room, but found the bed empty.

You quickly go to your oldest’s room, finding their bed empty as well.

“John!” You run down the stairs. “The kids-“

You freeze.

In the kitchen, you see John holding your youngest on his hip, the oldest on John’s strong back, their little arms and legs clinging around their father.

John tried not to laugh as he looked up and saw you standing in the kitchen now, seeing just how panicked you were.

“I’ve got ‘em.”

“Daddy knows how to make Mickey Mouse pancakes!” Your youngest grins widely. The normally grumpy-in-the-morning toddler was smiling like this was the best day ever.

“Anything f’r you, love.” He smiles at them, giving a kiss on the cheek before shifting his attention over to the oldest, who was still clinging to his back like a monkey. “How y’doin’ back there, buddy?”

“Awesome!” Your oldest cheers, their arms hugging around John’s neck.

Your heart aches.

Look how happy they are with their dad being home…

For a moment there, you forget all of your worries once you see those smiles on the kids’ faces,

John’s fatherly attention is getting to you.

You see how much your children are enjoying him being here, how much they love him.

How much he loves them.

You take your older child from John’s back and cover their little face with kisses, making them giggle like crazy.

“Help me set the table, little monkey.” You set the child to their feet and then handed them some silverware, while you take the plates.

“Dad’s gonna eat breakfast with us?!” Your little looked up at you with big blue eyes, as if it just clicked that John isn’t leaving right away.

“ ‘course I am.” John says, looking down at the little one and smiling as he sets a large plate of Mickey Mouse pancakes on the table.

“I wanna sit next to daddy!” The youngest says now, their eyes gleaming with the idea. The oldest had already reached their dad’s side, leaving you to finish setting up the table by yourself.

During breakfast, you notice how John is actively engaging in the conversation with the kids. He’s patiently listening to every story about a cartoon they’ve watched, answering every question about God-knows-what that they seemingly pulled out of nowhere.

Watching the love he has for them, as well as his playful nature with the both of them make you smile a bit. He’s still the same John you’d married all those years ago.

Isn’t that something.

After breakfast you have to fight to let John allow you to wash the dishes yourself.

He took the kids to the playroom and kept them entertained while you cleaned up.

Once the dishes are drying, you’re about to walk into the playroom. You pause in the hallway when you hear the kids talking to John in a hushed tone.

“Are you and mummy friends?” The youngest asks quietly.

You hear him let out a soft chuckle.

“Friends, yeah… We’re friends.” His soft tone of voice makes it evident that the subject of you two wasn’t exactly easy to talk about around the kids.

“Best friends?” The oldest pushes, the cheeky little kid.

“Yes, your mummy is my best friend.” John answers simply, unaware that you’re listening from the hall.

“Do you and mummy kiss?!” The oldest giggles, their little hands covering their mouth as if this was a question that could possibly get them in trouble.

You hear a nervous laugh escape John’s lips. He’s clearly flustered by the question from the five-year-old.

“Just what are you two cheeky kids talking about in here?” You ask as you walk in to save John, causing the two kids to burst into a giggle fit.

The youngest buries their face into John’s shoulder, not able to respond because of the giggles.

“Kissies! You and daddy have kissies! I saw it in a picture!” Your oldest says, their little voice filled with a matter-of-fact tone.

“Oh my god.” You cover your mouth, stifling your own nervous laughter.

They had seen your wedding photos that were still in an album in your home office.

You don’t know why you kept all of those, anyway. The past was the past. Why did you feel like holding on..?

John was now also filled with amusement when he heard how the little one had known all along. He knew there wasn’t really much way to go around this one, so it was probably best to just own up to it.

“You caught us. Mummy and I used to give kissies. We used to kiss a lot actually…”

You throw a stuffy from the floor at John, cutting him off.

The kids can’t help but laugh at John’s reaction as he pretends to clutch his chest out of pain when the plush, pink teddy hits him before bouncing off of his chest and onto the floor.

“Do you like-like mummy?” The oldest asks, their curiosity getting the best of them, not being able to move on just yet.

“That’s enough, little one.” You scoop your mini-John up and hold them in your lap as you sit on the playroom floor across from John.

“We wanna know!”

John sighs, seeing the way you’re looking to him for help in the matter. He decides to intervene.

“C’mon, monkeys. It’s time we’re all done playing and we start cleaning up now, yeah?” He says, trying to get them off the topic.

“Mummy, do you like-like daddy?” They shift the question to you now, since they know they’re not getting an answer out of their daddy.

You sigh.

“I love your daddy a lot. Just like I love you two a lot.” You answer simply, hoping that will end that.

More giggles.

“Mummy loves daddy, mummy loves daddy!” They sang in a teasing way.

You and John meet eyes. You shake your head. “Our children.”

He just grins.

“Do you love mum? Yes or no.” The older asks their father now, this time more demanding.

John takes a deep breath as he finally answers.

“Yes. I love your mum. Always will.”

The kids burst into more laughter, as if their parents like-liking each other is hilarious

Eventually John sends them off into the kitchen to get snacks.

The two of you stay sitting across from each other on the floor of the playroom.

“So…” You start, feeling the tension in the air. “Are you heading back home today, then?”

John shrugs his shoulders, a tiny smirk on his lips.

“Was thinking I’d stick around. It is my weekend with the kids, after all.”

Your eyes involuntarily roll, but there’s a smile on your lips.

It’d be easier, he said.

Won’t have to bundle the kids up.

Won’t have to pack two overnight bags.

Won’t have to worry about driving them on the icy roads.

He can just stay one more night, he suggested.

“Let me clear the driveway while you think it over.” He stood up, that stupid cocky grin on his face.

You met him in the mudroom about 10 minutes later.

“Go home and get your shit.” You said, arms crossed like it was against your will.

It’s for the kids, of course.

It was his weekend with them, after all.

“They were pesterin’ you, eh?”

“Didn’t take much convincing.” You blush.

With a light swat to your backside, John gets into his truck to retrieve his belongings.

* lemme know if u want me to continue 🥺 my asks are open if y’all want to suggest smth 🫣

[christinebloodwrittings]

Somebody that I used to know.

Request made by @white-00-7

Pairing: Alastor x Fem!reader Summary: Old friends turned into lovers under very distressing situations. Warning: Blood, Adam, violence.

After the Axe-man terrified the streets of New Orleans, there was the butcher of the bayou. A cannibalistic maniac, known to left no “crumbs” of their victims, so to speak. You knew that by being hunting season, he may be on the woods alongside you, what you didn’t counted on was the creep following you, rifle in hand.

A rustle was heard in between the bushes, you aimed at the bush with confidence, thinking it was probably a deer or a duck at least, the creep making haste to do the same, to your head. “Come out, come out” you whispered to yourself, seeing brown hair and antlers, there you shoot.

But the thud was lighter than a deer’s.

Moving the bush you saw a smiling man, “Holy shit!, no, sir, I’m so sorry, don’t die, help please!” you cried out, but as you turned around the lights were off as well. The sound of the trigger on the creep’s rifle was the last thing you heard.

The free fall was the least of it, but speaking of thousands of meters high, one does not think about the fall but rather the impact. However, it wasn't so hard for you, for the poor bastard under you, it was.

"Get off me!" he managed to throw you off his back, “I’m sorry, I didn’t meant to land on you” he dusted himself off as he regained his composure, clearing his voice when he noticed you were a woman.

“No, I apologize dear, here, let me help” He offered his clawed hand to yours, only by then both realized they didn’t looked like humans no more, “Interesting” he muttered, pulling gently on your arm.

He was looking at his new self when he heard a sudden laugh, “What’s so funny?” he questioned, then you pointed at yours and his little tail, “They’re so fluffy” he wasn’t so enchanted by the cutesy fact.

He was a deer, a white back at that. You on the other hand were a red one. A stag and a doe, how fitting both lifestyles of pride, more than anything.

“Why are you down here, dear?” you thought about it for a second, pride and rebellion was your first thought, then your taxidermy hobbies, “All I can think off is that poor man I killed as of a few minutes now, I mistook him for a…deer” he took a second to think about it, the click that made him stand up was a riffle trigger, your weapon.

He laughed, "You killed me," he continued his laughter, he took your arm to start walking towards the city, "I must say, my dear, that of all the evils in this world, you are the only thing I didn't think would send me to hell" It still made him laugh, "And it's even funnier that they killed you almost at the same time you killed me, life is a great irony" he smiled, one of the sweetest smiles he gifted you.

Now, don’t get him wrong, he was mad out of his mind, also slightly scared, not that he would admit that. Though the warmth of your arm linked with his brought him an anchor like feeling.

 After a few years of living together, Alastor disappeared without warning. "I will become stronger, soon the citizens of hell will know of my power” He used to take his place at your side and daydream about greatness and have everyone's respect, more fear than respect though.

“I will be able to protect you" that sentence lived rent free in your head, his voice a mere echo in your memories, after seven years you almost didn’t remembered his face anymore.

Alastor took care of the most bloodthirsty so that you didn't have to, without him there, you had to take measures into your own hands. The Pride Ring came to know you as one of the best snipers, the Overlord Ghost Shot, your elemental power to control the air could make your bullets fly up to lightspeed, also take away the oxygen off your enemies lungs.

You build up a company off the souls you began to own, you provided the fabrics that boosted businesses like Velvette’s or Rosie’s, known for the good quality and resistance. You didn’t worried yourself with planned obsolescence, there’s always a new design and a new trendy style that makes people keep buying.

And giving the amount of violence, clothes get ruin almost every day, Never in all the years you have been in hell have you been short of money, you managed to get a suite apartment in your own district, near the Morningstar district.

Eighty-four years of having Alastor by your side, and he just disappeared like he didn't care. Not a note, telegram, letter, anything in 7 years.

Until one afternoon when you received an invitation to an emergency meeting, it seems that Adam the first man brought forward the extermination half the time, having six months of preparation. Not one year you’ve lost a soul, but you weren’t going to start now.

“Asano, I need you to begin the preparations of the bunker, the winged rats will come down on us sooner than anticipated” you had souls knocking on your door, practically begging to make deals with you, giving that in exchange of their souls you provided safety, free housing, and a quality of life no other overlord did.

Although at the beginning some sinners wanted to abuse your good will, since you are a deer demon they tend to look down on you. They didn't find it funny anymore when they started to suffocate. Word on the street is that the air gets thicker when you’re in the room.

“I have the technical revision of my company Milla, if your plan is to arm yourself to fend off the attack don’t count on me, I have bigger priorities” Carmilla was one of your dearests friends, you made her gears laced with angelic steal fibers, and in return she updated your riffle, also gave you bullets made of angelic steal.

“I’m not saying we should, all we need is brainstorm a plan to lose as few souls as possible” she heard you made a pensative hum as she watched the overlords take their seats on the table, “You don’t wish to hide like we do, though you’ve lost more souls than I have over the years, so, do whatever you think is best, I’ll help if you want to listen for once” you hung up before Carmilla made herself aware of Alastor’s return.

 You didn’t owned a television, so Vox’s lovers spat never reached your way, and on the streets of your district no one really cared of other overlords, knowing they were under your wing.

"Y/n dear, how about you stop by the tower? They opened a new cafe on the corner, I bought cream cake and the tea that you like, it’s been a while since I saw you" said the letter that you received along with a new cell phone, Vox was more like a stone among the demons that courted you, and even though you sent his electronic junk broken back to his office, he didn't stop insisting.

“I’m so glad you came, how are your preparations for the extermination?” you brought the tea cup up to your lips, “It has been rather sudden; however I have managed to mobilize things on time, how about you?" he cut up a piece of cake, just as big as he knew you liked, “Oh we are fine, we aren’t the target anyway” your ears perked up in interest, his grin grew bigger on his face as he noticed.

“The princess is trying to redeem sinners, have you heard?” you nodded, “The Radio Demon is helping, but as useless as he is-” you began laughing, “The Radio Demon? What kind of pompous prick is named like that?” then sipped on the tea, “You know, Alastor” but as soon as he uttered that name, you choked on your tea and stormed out of his office.

And thank goodness, the air was too thick to breathe, Vox was having issues with it until you left.

“Mimzy, we know you’re in there you lousy bitch!” you heard the loan shark yell towards the  ‘Hazbin Hotel’, trying to knock the door down with a pry bar. “Gentleman, you’re in my way” you spoke, seeing a green glow wrapped the building.

“Not to mess with the Radio Demon!” taking another puff of your cigarette you watched the ten stories tall face of a man you used to know. A smile you didn’t recognized, stitched on the sides, holding his smile up. As soon as he finished eating the sharks he stopped on his tracks, merely centimeters away from your body.

“Y/n?” his distorted voice spoke in utter disbelief, “Good day Alastor, it’s been many moons, don’t you think?” He was frozen, the cute little deer girl he left all those years ago was nowhere to be seen. Replaced by a woman, wearing a dark black attire and tired eyes.

"Y/n, long time no see" he had to shift his voice a little, Charlie and the rest were right behind him inside the hotel. His chirp tone making it seem like he didn't disappeared at all, was a direct stab to your heart.

"You look..." you didn't know anymore, "Different" eyeing him from top to bottom with a disgust grimace in your face hurt him beyond his understanding, "Yes well, I told you I would get stronger" his eyes were different, they were empty.

"I see that, have a good day" you turned around in your heels ready to walk away from the place, "Y/n wait, that's it?" He was hurt? Why did he felt the audacity to pretend to be the victim when you were left behind.

"What else you want me to say?" Since he left, you stopped being joyful, the killing and the merciless torture you went through did that, and it was all his fault.

"A warmer welcome would be nice" you took out your rifle then shoot his shoulder with a dull bullet, "Warmer than that?" It didn't bleed but it hurt, so much it made Alastor take a few steps back.

"Alastor!" The princess cried out for him, "What do you think you're doing?!" Her little horns and red eyes made you snicker a little, "Is this what you've been doing all these years? Help this little girl with her hotel?" Alastor stood up, making seem as it didn't hurt at all, "Now, now Charlie, all is fine, no damage done" she tried to worry about him but it was no use, "Who is Alastor to you?" She asked you, distorted voice and hair flaring.

Alastor had his eyes on you specially when you locked on his dials flashing on and off, "Someone I used to know” the pain was real that time, Alastor didn’t even try to hide it, “Y/n please, let me explain” a small laugh escaped your lips, the first smile he saw from you in a while.

“Not a note, letter, smoke signal, nothing in seven years” he tried to make up an excuse, but you didn’t let him speak, “I had to find out from Vox, and as distasteful as he is, at least is a true friend to be in touch at least three times a week” the fact he told you sent a holy bullet up on his pride, “I can’t explain” he went again.

“I-don’t-FUCKING-care” you accentuated every word, “Woah, what is going on here?” the one and the only Lucifer Morningstar came next to his daughter, wondering wat was taking her so long after she ran out.

“They know each other” Charlie waved her hand in between the two. “Lover’s spat?” he inquired mockingly, which you replied with a straightforward and cold “No” making the devil choke on some saliva, “Makes sense though, with a face like that” when Lucifer turned his eyes from Alastor to you he saw the end of your rifle, “First one is a dull, will hurt, the second a holy one, apologize” internally Lucifer applauded your bravery, so with a smile that reached his ears he uttered “I’m sorry Alastor, I didn’t meant to bring out the obvious”.

He made you smile, “Good enough” you put the rifle strap over your shoulder again, “I’m not going to apologize for that, by the way” he didn’t expected you to.

Alastor watched the scene with jealousy, as in less than two seconds of interaction you received Lucifer in a better way than him, you even smiled at him better than him. If he had a reason to be angry that was one. When you turned your head he noticed a burn on your neck, then he went down and saw the scars on your hands, maybe how many more marks you had on your body, experiences  that took away the innocent friend he used to have.

"You're thin, you don't eat enough or what? What happened to your teeth?" you started making questions that made Alastor sweat, “What is this Radio Demon shit? Who do you think you are, huh?" “Somone that will take you down if you keep at it” “Baby, we’re not at the same level, you are the lowest of the overlords”

“She’s right” “I haven’t lost a single soul in all these years, I can steal air from your lungs by just wanting it” he started feeling at loss of breath, his lungs compressed forcefully searching for oxygen, “I offered you my life, my time, my love” you straightened his bow tie, ignoring Charlie’s pleas for you to stop hurting him, “And you just kissed me, and early in the morning after, you took off, seven years without a single signal you were alive”.

“And now I find out that you’ve been here for five months already, not even once you tried to reach me” your hands palmed his chest slowly, your warmth poring through his clothes, “I have my territory delimited by a black line, if you cross it, I won’t be so nice as I am now” you hovered your lips over his, returning the air down his throat.

Lucifer whistled an impressed tune, “Y/n please, I can explain” he heard Alastor breathing rapidly, getting off Charlie’s support to try to get you, his knees stopping on their tracks due to the lack of strength left, “Y/n right? He looks like he wants to make things right, please give him a chance” she plead, it getting to your head very quickly, damn that puppy face.  

“Y/n please, tea and tea” he dared to say, bringing Lucifer’s attention, “What’s that?” he looked your way for an explanation, “It’s where we drink tea and talk” you thought about it for a second then looked at his eyes once more, “Someday, not today, you seem preoccupied” with that you took your leave, feeling your heart heavy and lonesome as you did.

It wasn’t until Extermination day, that from your balcony you saw the horde of angels drop on the hotel, immediately seeing the flow of Alastor’s dark magic being shattered by Adam. Almost out of instinct you ensembled your long distance sniper rifle, setting it on the edge of the rail, waiting for a perfect angle to make the winged rat fall.

 Suddenly Alastor few against the edge of the building, that’s when you shot, the bullet piercing the base of both of Adam’s wings, making him wince and drop against the ceiling in pain.

“Radio ain’t dead until I say so, asshole” you allowed wind to take your message, prepping another bullet in the chamber, aiming directly at his head, “Freaky face has a girlfriend?” he joked to pass a little of the pain, “Y/n?” Alastor whispered to himself, feeling the air shift around him, his body reappearing beside you after a swirl of air teleported him.

“When I get my hands on you-“ you didn’t let Adam finish, shooting the joint of his shoulder, leaving useless his dominant arm. “Y/n” that’s all Alastor could utter, seeing you so beautifully concentrated in your aim, “You think I’ll spoil it for Lucifer if I shoot him dead?” you gave Adam a warning shot on the leg, the next one being a holy one.

“Good riddance either way, mon coeur” he had carefully stood up, supporting his weight with a hand on the railing and another around your waist, “Oh never mind, six wings is beating the shit out of him now” you said a tad disappointed since your game ended, feeling Alastor hiss at his wound.

“Don’t touch it, let’s go, I’ll help” you sat him on your bed, helping him discard his clothes. “I’m sorry for leaving like that” he sounded so sad and weak, he was deeply angry at himself for how blind he was, for taking you for granted and abandoning you without explanations.

“It doesn’t matter anymore” you made haste to patch up the wound as best as you could, but there was so much blood blocking your way, “Y/n, please forgive me” he pleads as you try your best to stitch the would close, “Why do you care so much whether if I forgive you or not?” he cupped your face, a tenderness unknown for you, uncommon of him.

He wasn’t used to be gentle, not desiring to rip your flesh apart was new to him. Instead there was this fire that warmed him up from the tip of his ears to the tip of his hooves, “Because…I love you” that word felt right, as his hands  brought your hips closer to him, his thighs on each side of your knees, “The moment to say that, was seven years ago” you allowed your powers to wrapped his bandages in a perfect way, “I can make it up to you” he could think of a thousand ways to bring you back to him, unsure if in the way you were now, any of those would work, but he had the rest of eternity to find out.

“And who assures me that you won't disappear again? I felt so alone without you” his hands pulled down your hips, seating you on his leg, “Me, I promise you I’m not leaving you again, I can’t” you laughed, hands on his bare shoulders, feeling the thin layer of fur.

“Is it because now I’m powerful?” he didn’t expected you to think different of him, he couldn’t blame you, “No, because I cannot breathe without you, I missed you very much, mon amour” seven years of you in his mind, haunting him, missing the warm spot in his bed, refusing to sleep at all if it wasn’t with you.

“Please my love, my moon, my sun, my everything, let me rectify my wrongs” a chill it enveloped your entire body, “Or let your gun finish what you started” he reminded you of your set of words of earlier, his smile relaxed and lovely, “If you ever dare to abandon me again, I’ll prove that you in fact can die twice” your hissing at the last word made him sigh happily, then he moved to place a kiss on your cheek, inhaling your scent.

“You’re hurt” you whispered when his kiss traveled down to your neck, “I know, but I can bare it” you plead that he took a small time to rest, but he kept tightening his arm on your waist, then the other on the back of your neck.

When he licked the underside of your neck up to your chin, he suddenly winced, proving your point, “How about we try something else?” you saw him grin, he only did that when he had something on his head, “William found the bath a while ago” you saw the slippery friend crawl up the wall, a proud smile on his face.

“You sent him to draw a bath?” he chuckled, “I remembered it was something you fancied, the morning after us…” he remembered, you told him you wanted to wash his hair in the morning, but he left before even giving you an answer, “You know that means I’ll have to touch you?” his ears pinned down on his head so he could nuzzle against your neck, “Ever since that day, I’ve craved no one’s touch, just yours”.

His grin grew when he felt a certain movement against his forearm, “Damn thing” you cursed, “You’re not the only one” he was wagging his life off, he guided your hand to his lower back so you could feel him, “Sappy old man” you kissed his lips, “You’re not that younger than me” he continued the loving gesture, “The water will get cold” you heard the shadow groan thinking his efforts will go to waste.

“Let’s get to it then” you spent the rest of the night in each other’s arms, Alastor nearly passed out when you were massaging his scalp with the lovely scented shampoo, you told him you were never going to stop bragging about it. Then when it was your turn to get pampered, he couldn’t stop himself from kissing your shoulders, the back of your neck, arms, every piece of skin he could.

His hands just as yours were free to roam around, both delighting in the ministrations, to the point only moans of satisfaction were echoing in the bathroom.

“Just so you know, if you have a significant other, he’s dead, you’re mine now” you giggled at his possessive nature, now both dry but still naked on the bed, “Good thing I ended that relationship months ago” you sassed him, earning a small bite on your clavicle, “As soon as I’m better, I’m claiming you” his eyes shifted to have dials, “Sure thing, you have a lot of pain to make up for, ya’ know?” he knew that.

There were parts of your body that were burnt, others covered by patches made of steel, then there were the cuts, the scars, the lashes, everything he acknowledged it was his fault, “This, are they dead?” you shook your head, “Then my broadcast will have new voices” his voice took a low tone and the growl made you feel butterflies, “Thank you” you whispered, lowering just enough so you could have your head under his chin, legs intertwined, arms holding each other as close as possible.

“This is going to sound weird, but I’m glad I killed you” he let out a breathy laugh, “Me too”.

[thoughtidtry]

Dress pt.1 - LN

SUMMARY: Lando's best friend can't keep pretending he's not her everything. Not after missing seeing him in person for so long. PAIRING: Lando Norris X LongDistanceBestfriendfem!reader A/N: Inspired by Lando's race win and song Dress by Taylor Swift. First time publishing my fanfics so I’d love to hear what you think! Almost 2K..... I'll do a pt.2 cause I still have more thoughts on Lando with this song.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Our secret moments in a crowded room. They got no idea about me and you"

Lando couldn't stop smiling at his phone in the paddock, not when you were the one texting him. All the drivers knew about his best friend, who they never got to meet.

"She's a busy person"

He would declare anytime they teased him about meeting you or asked if you were coming to a race. It wasn't that he didn't want you to come or that he didn't want you to meet the other drivers, more he didn't want to share your time. He wasn't lying to them per se you were busy and had moved to America for university as soon as you both had graduated secondary school. It didn't matter he had never actually invited you to a race.

"I'm spilling wine in the bathtub. You kiss my face and we're both drunk"

He could remember the night or well day you left like it was yesterday. The night before your flight, he had stayed over to spend as much time with you as possible. The giggles you made sneaking back into your room after your parents had gone to bed were almost as intoxicating as the wine you had brought back. You both stayed up drinking and reminiscing over the years you had spent together.

Somehow you had both ended up in the bathroom attached to your room. Too drunk to sit let alone stand, you had made yourself comfortable in the bathtub while he was seated beside you leaning up against it. He doesn't remember what was said or how it happened, but he will never forget how soft your lips felt against his or how you sighed after the kiss with a dopey grin as if a weight had been lifted off your chest.

The next morning he woke up in your bed but you were nowhere to be seen. A note on the bedside table along with some pain meds was all that was left.

Tried to wake you to say bye before my flight, but you wouldn't wake up. I don't know how much we drank but I've got a killer headache and can't remember anything so thanks for that. Text me when you wake! Love, Y/N

You had always kept in contact but he never would tell you what happened that night. He didn't want to lose you even if that kiss would haunt him every time he closed his eyes. You managed the time difference well, never judging the other for being up or asleep at random times throughout the day.

Late-night calls when you wanted to tell him something funny between classes changed to funny things your friends had done once you graduated from university. Even the early morning drunken messages he'd get around the time he woke up were moments he cherished. He missed having you next to him. Wished you would come home, but you have your life now in America and found a good job after university.

"All of this silence and patience. Pinning and desperately waiting"

Little did Lando know, the other drivers had stolen his phone and gotten your number long ago just waiting for the right moment to use it. Daniel was the first to reach out and introduce himself explaining Lando had wanted to let you know his phone had died.

You had shrugged it off, with how much Lando talked about the other driver it didn't seem that surprising to you that Lando had given your number to him. It was no surprise to Daniel how friendly and kind you were, but how smart you were was a shock. He never would have imagined their little Lando was friends with a lawyer.

Carlos and Oscar followed soon after hearing more about you from Daniel. They both said they wanted to get some stories of Lando as a kid to make fun of him so they begged Daniel for your number and to not tell Lando. You had a laugh retelling stories to them both that you knew Lando would be embarrassed about.

Max and Charles on the other hand had respected Lando's privacy when it came to you until they were added to a group chat with you made by Oscar without Lando's knowledge.

You didn't speak to the other drivers much in the group chat so you had forgotten it existed most of the time. They would send you pictures of Lando doing goofy things every once in a while, but that was about it. Never once did you think to mention it to Lando, it was a little secret look into his world and the photos gave you a way to know he was having fun. They reminded you of all the good times you both had shared together.

"Flashback when you met me. Your buzzcut and my hair bleached. Even in my worst times, you could see the best in me."

Secondary school hadn't started out easily for you, having moved away from all of your primary school friends. As a farewell, you all decided to color each other's hair. You had ended up a platinum blonde which made you stand out even more on the first day of school. Making new friends was hard at first. Most of the time you felt alone in a sea of unfamiliar faces.

It was probably the worst time of your life looking back. At least until a boy with a cheeky grin and sassy comebacks made it his mission to befriend you. At first, you didn't know what to make of the boy. Turned out his friend group had done something similar to yours but had buzzed all their hair off instead of dyeing it. He saw the girl with good grades who sat alone every day not as a freak like everyone else but as someone worth taking a chance on. You had no right to fall as fast as you did, but you couldn't help it. He was funny, kind, and well perfect.

"Flashback to my mistakes. My rebounds, my earthquakes. Even in my worst lies, you saw the truth in me."

As secondary school went on, Lando changed, not as a person but physically. No longer was he the straggly, small, buzzcut kid. He got taller, grew his hair out, and even became charming in a way you would never have imagined. Looking back he could remember getting his first girlfriend and how excited he was only to have his heartbroken.

He dated around more from then on, never getting attached to another girl. By developing a confident and flirtatious appearance he could avoid being hurt again. It worked on everyone as he gained popularity, everyone except you. You saw him for who he really was, always there to catch him when the mask slipped off and he shattered on the ground. Something he would always appreciate you for.

"All of this silence and patience. Pinning and anticipation"

When the drivers had first approached you with their plan you were skeptical.

Would he even want to see me after all this time?

You thought. You two had always talked about meeting again but your schedules never aligned. He always had a race or you had a case that you could miss. They talked about how Lando had seemed down the last couple of weeks while you had been busy with a case, how they thought he missed you, and that they had a race in America soon. Blow care to the wind you agreed. How could you miss the chance to see him again.

Clutching the hem of your shirt as you walked into the paddock for the first time, Daniel was waiting past security to show you around. Oscar had been able to pull some strings and get you a Race Day VIP pass without Lando knowing. You texted in the group chat and Daniel had been sent to come get you so Lando wouldn't notice. He couldn't stop talking about how excited he was to see the look on Lando's face as you two walked.

"Say my name and everything just stops. I don't want you like a best friend."

Soon enough Lando's laughter fills the air as Carlos holds his shoulder while bending over in laughter as well. You stood still for a moment watching to carve this memory of him into your mind before moving closer.

You smiled a bit to yourself, he was always the life of the party, always finding a way to make everyone around him laugh, and as always oblivious to his surroundings. He was still the same Lando you had fallen for all those years ago.

"Hey, Lan."

You said once you were a few feet away. Lando froze for a moment before turning around to look at you in shock. He couldn't believe you were here. Really here standing in the paddock only a few feet away next to Daniel of all people. He decided he didn't care how it happened only that it did.

Your hands started to shake as he stared at you. You wanted to hug him, kiss him, do something, but you were stuck. Stuck looking at him with hope in your eyes that he would say something, do something. Anything.

Carlos chucked at Lando's state before patting him on the back.

"Well, are you just gonna stand there? You know it took a lot of planning to get her here."

Lando snapped out of his trance, looking in between Carlos and you before breaking out in a sprint straight for you with the biggest smile on his face. He lifted you up by the waist spinning around with you in his arms.

It felt so good to have you in his arms again after all this time. At that moment, he realized it didn't matter how long it had been you were his home and he wasn't gonna let you go again.

[exhuastedpigeon]

Inspiration Sunday?

My allergies have been ruining my life the last week and shit has been busy in real life, so I haven't had much time or mental energy to write.

BUT the video of the Diaz parents on set at the same time as Buck, Eddie, and Chris, coupled with the pictures of the actress who plays Shannon on set, inspired me to outline a fic that could end up being a beast - here's a little snippet from the first chapter.

“Morning,” Eddie gets out of bed and makes his way to the bathroom, kissing Shannon on the cheek as he passes her. When he looks in the mirror his breath catches in his chest because he looks older than he remembers. His temples have streaks of gray and there are lines around his mouth that he doesn’t remember, but the most jarring thing is the lack of lines around his eyes, like he hasn’t smiled enough to have earned them.  He finishes brushing his teeth and takes a piss before grabbing an Advil hoping it can fix his still aching head. When he pokes his head into Chris’s room he finds it empty, a full bed replacing the twin that he remembers. The room doesn’t look lived in, it’s too neat and tidy for his messy teenager of a son. “Where’s Chris?” Eddie asks when he walks into the kitchen. Everything feels slightly to the left, like it’s his life but through a fun house mirror. He still feels odd looking at Shannon, a weird sense of grief washing over him that he doesn’t understand.  “Probably at his apartment,” Shannon gave him a funny look as she poured herself a cup of coffee.  “His apartment?” “How hard did you hit your head yesterday?” Now she looks mildly concerned. 

tagged by @inell @shipperqueen6 @thekristen999 @theotherbuckley @wikiangela

@dangerpronebuddie @alliaskisthepossibilityoflove @acountrygirlsfun @cal-daisies-and-briars

no pressure tagging @sunshinediaz @spagheddiediaz @neverevan @jeeyuns @watchyourbuck

@rosieposiepuddingnpie @rainbow-nerdss @monsterrae1 @loserdiaz @thewolvesof1998

@daffi-990 @wildlife4life @devirnis @spotsandsocks @eddiebabygirldiaz

@steadfastsaturnsrings @actualalligator @underwaterninja13 @jesuisici33 @honestlydarkprincess

@tizniz @bi-buckrights @fortheloveofbuddie @sibylsleaves @loveyouanyway

@epicbuddieficrecs @ladydorian05 @hawkbutt @elvensorceress @herrmannhalsteadproduction and anyone else who wants to share!

[chaifootsteps]

Full Moon anon, ask 2/2

OK, let's go back to these so called defences of Stolas

Blitzo isn't entitled to the book

Blitzo could negotiate his way out of the deal

Blitzo could do another job

it's not coercive because Stolas will give him a month or two off if he's sick/not feeling up to it

Blitzo enjoys sex and is fine making transactional deals/treating sex like a trade to get what he wants

Blitzo should know Stolas cares about him for more than sex because of the list of things he describes Stolas doing in Oops

First one - Blitzo isn't entitled to the book. That's true; it's not Stolas' responsibility or his fault that Blitzo founded a business around having access to the grimoire after he stole it. But I also have seen absolutely no one suggest Blitzo is entitled to the grimoire.

What I have seen them suggest is that Stolas could have proposed literally any other arrangement for the book, or none at all. He could have just taken it back. He could have told Blitzo about the Asmodean Crystals way, way sooner or helped him get one. He could even have punished Blitzo for stealing. Bottom line is, no one forced him to handle the situation by extorting Blitzo for sex despite having no reason to believe Blitzo would have been happy sleeping with him once a month - they had a one night stand then Blitzo started ducking his calls. Stolas assuming Blitzo would be happy trading sex for the book is his own delusion.

Also like - it bothers me no one acknowledges the sketchiness of Stolas mentioning explicitly 'you know how I've been permitting you to access the mortal realm less than legally for some time now?' In Stolas' own words, he let Blitzo have the book with no strings attached for some time, despite knowing it was illegal, and then when Blitzo was starting to get the business off the ground with a client he called up to change up the deal (and again, he waited until Blitzo had no time to think and didn't make it a proper transaction/business discussion).

That's way crueller than if he had just refused Blitzo the book before he'd started the business. Stolas knowingly broke the rules and was irresponsible with the grimoire, presumably because lending out the book gave him an excuse to keep calling Blitzo to do dirty talk over the phone (and then get hung up on, at least back when the pilot was canon). He was already seeing his book as a transactional way to have a one sided thing with Blitzo. Whatever it is he even does with the book as part of his duties he doesn't even care to have it in his possession apart from once every month and he doesn't care enough for the grimoire to protect it. He consistently sees it as a way to get what he wants out of his 'affair' with Blitzo.

Second one - Blitzo could negotiate his way out. This argument is annoying to me, to be honest, bcause it rests entirely on framing the argument through how the writers treat Stolas now and not how they wrote him back in Murder Family. Murder Family Stolas cares so little for Blitzo's well being that he shows zero concern when a gunshot goes off right next to Blitzo's head - given where Blitzo was holding the phone, it should've been pretty darn loud in Stolas' ear but all he has to say is 'then let me keep it simple: give me sex once a month or no book'. Stolas so far has not developed into understanding this was wrong (anyone's guess whether full moon will see him take 100% responsibility for the way he pitched the deal or not), they've just magically retconned him into the kind of person who wouldn't have done that in the first place (or so they tell us, a lot of what we're shown Stolas is like suggests he still has the same classist neglectful habits as s1 - only now we're supposed to think that's funny or Via should shut up whining)

anyway, It's kind of weird to suggest Blitzo should negotiate his way out when Blitzo circa season 1 was dealing with a way crueller, colder Stolas. He had no reason to assume that Stolas would hesitate to punish him for trying to wrangle his way out of the deal, not when he spends the entire Loo Loo Land trip ignoring Blitzo's boundaries and even as late as Truth Seekers (one episode before Stolas goes from just interested in sex to suddenly in love with Blitzo) he hammers home the message to Blitzo that even his help comes with transactional strings when he asks for a thank you for saving Blitzo's life and doesn't balk at Blitzo's assumption that he wants sex. Why would Blitzo, knowing what Stolas is like in s1, even bother trying to reason with him? In Stolas' own words, he's the owl's 'plaything'. You don't negotiate fairly with playthings, you pinch their cheek and put cigarettes out on them.

Third one - Blitzo could do another job. He could, sure. But I find this a weird line of argument since it assumes that it's fine to question Blitzo trying to rise above his station by starting a business that requires access to the human realm, but it's never fine to question why it's OK for Stolas to just be handed the power to get to the human realm. Also, like - going off Blitzo's dialogue about the business not killing people in Hell anymore, it implies maybe the business was based around Hell hits originally but that didn't work out for some reason, so they pivoted to a new USP. And given the economic precarity most imps are in, it's pretty unempathetic to say Blitzo should just give up on his business and get another job when he has a daughter to support and 'another job' in imp terms from everything we've seen in the show likely means low paid menial labor. It's fine for Stolas to have all the money and power that gives him, but Blitzo should be non stop judged for being poor wrong, for daring to want access to resources that were just handed to royalty for no other reason than birthright and succeed past expectations. If he didn't want Stolas extorting him for sex he should have been happy being a farmer providing food for everyone else, or being a butler to someone like Stolas who likes to use them as stress balls when he's mad at his wife!

Fourth one - it's not coercive because Stolas will give him a month or two off. I don't even think this kind of argument deserves dignifying with a response tbh. If Stolas treats Blitzo kindly or cruelly in this arrangement, the arrangement itself is still coercive. If Blitzo cannot easily end it as and when he wants to due to his economic circumstances, it's coercive. The circumstances Stolas used to make the deal were coercive. Period, end of.

Fifth one - Blitzo enjoys sex and is fine making transactional deals/treating sex like a trade to get what he wants. Two things here. We see him seduce Stolas to get the book the first time, but he wasn't actually interested in sleeping with him - he wanted to leave. He went back out of pity; it wasn't his original intention to trade sex for the book. Second, Blitzo enjoying sex doesn't make the circumstances Stolas used to pitch the deal any less coercive. Also, Blitzo enjoying sex with Stolas is very much something written in to season 2. Where is it hinted he actually enjoyed sex with Stolas in s1?? He spends the Loo Loo Land episode rebuffing/being annoyed by Stolas' advances and he's outright indifferent post sex in Harvest Moon (and it visibly gets to him when Striker says he shouldn't have to demean himself to be able to run his business - why is that the case if he enjoys being exploited?). Even in the ending of Truth Seekers it plays more like he's clawing what little power he can back by being the dominant one in the relationship. We see very few instances of Blitzo actually being enthused about sexual advances from Stolas in s1, even in some of the instas covering the deal; I don't think it's good enough to just claim this is tsundere behavior. Also there's a difference in a one time quid pro quo one night stand sort of thing and having a sustained affair whether you want to or not to keep your job going. Blitzo freely and enthusiastically jumped into bed with Chaz, partly to get info from M&M. But he did want to sleep with Chaz. He didn't wince in revulsion when Chaz made a move on him, even if the sex they actually had wasn't great due to Chaz being a loser.

Last one: Blitzo should know Stolas cares about him for more than sex because of the list of things he describes Stolas doing in Oops. So this argument goes that regardless if the audience isn't shown anything suggesting Stolas cares about more than sex from Blitzo, Blitzo should definitely know because of all the stuff he listed when he was ranting to Fizz.

I'm gonna be blunt - this line of argument is just rewarding the writers for lousy writing.

They couldn't be bothered to give the audience the sense Stolas has ever given Blitzo the impression he wants more than sex because he refused to end the deal until s2, so they just have the characters polyfill all that in and expect us to judge Blitzo as cynical or unreasonable based on a new relationship dynamic they retconned in just that second. It's even worse when they have long scrolls of blink and you miss it text messages - not only is it lazy but stans act like they have greater media literacy because they paused to read each message, even though important information like that should be in the actual show and not treated like some kind of bonus easter egg.

And just to drive the point home - even if we want to count all these lazy retcons around what the dynamic between Stolas and Blitzo is, it wouldn't matter all that much because their entire relationship is founded on the full moon deal. Until Stolas does something to end it, it's entirely valid for Blitzo to feel Stolas ultimately just wants sex. If someone takes advantage of the fact you can't freely consent to get you to hastily agree to monthly sex then tries to act sweet after the fact, personally I'd be more inclined to feel annoyed that they want to have it both ways and feel like they're a good person treating me like a romantic partner instead of being honest with themselves about how they've treated me until now. And wouldn't you know it, that's exactly what Blitzo tells him at the end of Ozzie's. And if we're counting blink and you miss is text messages as being valid ways to understand their relationship, there's also a text message from Stolas where he says he's sorry 'if anything he said or did offended Blitzo'. He's not sorry for the actual thing he did wrong; he obviously doesn't understand the problem. So if we're counting the lazy text messages and offscreen phonecalls as 'fixing' their dynamic to being cute and sweet on Stolas' end we also have to count the fact that he currently can't bring himself to understand why what he's doing is wrong.

It'd be like if Fifty Shades of Grey followed up that scene of Christian getting Ana drunk on purpose while they're supposed to be hammering out the dom/sub contract with scenes of him being an asshole who doesn't care about her freely consenting to anything just so long as he gets sex, then they tried to 'fix' all that by showing Ana's text history is full of Christian trying to be lovey dovey (while ignoring what the problem is with him getting her drunk). It doesn't fix the fact that she can't properly consent to the dom/sub lifestyle he wants if he gets her drunk while they're talking about it. If anything the audience would probably feel he was more creepy, not less, because he's engaging in lovebombing behaviors while all we're being shown on screen is him not respecting her consent or her as a person. And then being supposed to judge Anastasia for it and not Christian!

sorry for the long rant, it's just - Stolas defending arguments are like hydra. every time one is dismantled a bunch more worse and disturbingly victim-blamey ones pop up in their place. I'm honestly glad I'm giving up on the show for good after the next ep - mostly I'm just rubbernecking to see how bad they're gonna mess the 'breakup' episode up

You don't know how cathartic every last word of this precious sanity was to read. Gonna keep it on hand, when I need reminding that the world isn't completely hopeless.

[fuck-customers]

This happened today and I found it so funny. My company sends out managerial reviews yearly to employees so that they can anonymously review their managers and it affects their manager’s bonuses/raises. Now I hate my manager and I could write a whole essay about how much of an asshole he is as a manager and as a human being so I left him a low rating. I didn’t leave any comments in the comment section because I had a feeling he’d tried to guess who left a bad review based on the writing style. Fortunately he had no idea who left him a bad review and he’s pissed and annoyed by it because it’ll affect his compensation. According to the one coworker who does like him, he feels hurt because he’s always advocating for us so he wasn’t expecting us to do this to him. I doubt that because advocating for us means extra work for him and he never takes our side when other departments blame us for stuff they did. So I’m glad he’s upset. I could tell it was really eating away at him because his petty ass forwards me an invite to a meeting that I originally wasn’t part of 9 mins before it starts while I was taking a customer call. So I arrived to the meeting late and the whole time I was the meeting I saw him fidgeting and squirming in his seat so I bet he wasn’t able to focus on the meeting. One of the attendees asked him if he thought a particular part of a slide was ok twice but he was too busy fiddling with his pen so I casually swooped in and answered for him and then asked if he agreed

Posted by admin Rodney

[ashethecoolperson]

🫶 requuuueeeesssssttttt : jealous dom x reader (honestly in any scenario) but picturing him jealous is so 😭🤭 (ur writing is soo good ik whatever u cook up will be 🤌)

Jealous

A/N: i love jealous dom hndhsjhsskb

Dom, hurry up! We’ll be late!” You yelled from the living room, still waiting for him to get ready after an hour. You guys had to go to a business party and you weren’t trying to be late. But you thought that Dom was purposely trying to be late.

As you groaned and went upstairs, you opened the door and saw Dom with a towel wrapped around his waist, his hair still wet from what seemed like a shower. You were lost for words as you swallowed nervously and kept looking at him.

God he looked hot.

“You almost ready?” You finally asked after what seemed like hours, and he nodded. “Almost, mi amor. Just lost my suit.”

You smiled slightly as he continued putting on clothes. “You know, we need to leave soon.” You said softly, watching him get dressed, trying not to stare too much at him. But Dom noticed anyway.

He stopped, turned, and looked at you, raising an eyebrow. You tried not to blush at his stare. “Whatcha looking at?” He asked teasingly as you rolled your eyes. “Nothing. Now hurry up, we’ll be late.” You said plainly and he scoffed.

“Stop rushing me.” He whined and did that little pout he always did, as you just laughed and left.

—-

After you two finally left and got to the business party, you immediately noticed how crowded it actually was. You weren’t complaining, of course, because you loved parties, but Dom kept glaring at every man that even came close to you. It wasn’t exactly surprising, though, considering how easily jealous Dom got. But it was funny for some reason. Not to mention how cute he looked, blushing and being angry at people who wanted nothing more than to talk to you.

But once Dom went off to get drinks, you felt a tap on your shoulder and turned around. Almost immediately you felt like groaning since it was the man you hated most, Logan Paul.

He was so snobby and a shit person, and yet he wanted to be friends with you.

You wondered why he wanted to be friends with you, probably because he wanted to get to Dom too.

“Hey, babe!” Logan exclaimed as he wrapped an arm around your shoulders and you stiffened.

Why did he always have to call you babe?

“Hi Logan.” You said plainly and tried not to get his drink all over you since he was practically swinging it around. He didn’t seem to notice though as he continued talking about whatever the fuck had happened to him recently. It was honestly annoying, but you weren’t going to say anything. He was the golden star of the company, and if you did what you actually wanted to, you’d probably either get fired or be in prison.

“Soooo, how’s Dom been doing?” Logan asked as he looked down at you, not like the good way that Dom did, but in a way that was uncomfortable.

“He’s been good..just doing normal stuff.” You mumbled and he grinned. Of course he wouldn’t believe you. He was a creep.

Just then Dom came back and you breathed a sigh of relief, shrugging Logan’s hand off of your shoulders and smiling at how Dom wrapped an arm around your waist.

Dom scowled as Logan scrambled for a reply. “Eso no es my fault!” He exclaimed, and Dom just stared.

Even you didn’t know why Logan did spanglish.

“Spanglish? Eso es bajo, incluso para ti.” Dom said as he rolled his eyes and glared at Logan. “Shoo.” He added before turning to you and walking away, dragging you with him.

As you two were outside, he looked down at you. “Mi amor, why didn’t you say anything? You know I hate him.” He asked as his hands were on your hips, gently pulling you closer. As you rested your head on his chest, you sighed contently.

“I wanted to beat his ass.” You said with a shrug as he started to laugh, rolling his eyes. “Can we go home?” You asked and he sighed. “Yeah. This party’s boring as hell anyways.”

Goddamn, you loved when he was jealous.

[akxmee]

★ 00. 𝗣𝗥𝗢𝗟𝗢𝗚𝗨𝗘.

"...and we are not certain of how long that would take. Please, hide at home and by under any means, do not open your doors to any animal. Thank you for your attention!"

You turned the television off from the sofá you were sitting on. It has been chaos these days, and you were so sure it was a matter of time until the government confined the whole city until they find them.

Them, the hybrids.

Humans with the hability of turning themselves into different kinds of animals.

Humans, if that's even a valid term to refer to them. Dangerous humans that think as animals and don't feel any remorse.

The lack of information the government was giving everyone about them was close to none, and it was making you mad.

God, you were so tired of this.

"Woof!"

The bark interrumped your thoughts. You looked to your left and before even knowing it, you were being assaulted by a huge and ridiculously fluffy dog.

Ah, satoru.

He was your adorable samoyedo, a beautiful and friendly canine breed that was licking your entire face the moment he laid his paws on you.

"Ew 'toru, gross. Get off!"

You tried your best to get your pet off you, reaching your goal after a few struggles. With the end of your sleeve you wiped your face as well as you wrote a mental note of cleaning your face before going to sleep.

Satoru kept wagging his tail, waiting for his rubs that he got not too long after. You pet him for a while until a yawn comes out of your mouth, looking at the hour.

2am.

Damn, that extra shift at work was long.

So yes, maybe going to sleep was the best option at this very moment. You got up and walked through the rooms, stopping at the bathroom to clean the sticky mess satoru made mostly on your cheek. Once your face was clean enough not to feel gross anymore you grabbed the nearest towel and dried your face with it, staring into your reflection's eyes in the mirror.

You had bags under your eyes, messy hair and your skin looked paler than usual; it was painfully obvious that you haven't had a wink of sleep lately.

There were so many reasons why.

For example, the fact that you were getting fewer and fewer clients with the pass of the time since the news of hybrids walking among humans were simply thrown to the audience's face. Some people were scared to go out and you were losing money, not a lot, but still money. Extra hours at the café were spent working just to get a few more clients, and you don't even know how to manage your time right now to get a proper bit of sleep.

But honestly? You could go with It just for your pets' sake.

Because they were the reason why you had your own business right now, and the only ones who listened to you rant about your shitty day at work at the end of the day.

So you shaked your thoughts away and went for satoru, patting the side of your leg as a silent order for him to follow you.

"C'mon, toru. Let's go to sleep, i'm sure suguru is there too."

The dog ran to your side in no time and you two went to your room. It was cozy, simple with a lot of photos pinned on a huge cardboard on the wall.

Some were of you, some of your friends and family. Your gaze landed on a specific photo, one of satoru and suguru dressed in some type of cheap pets costume you bought for a few dollars online. They looked adorable, satoru's fluffy hair looking so messy in the picture and suguru making a funny face that you got just in time. You were so sure they hated that picture, but you loved it.

As you looked over the bed you found out your assumption was right, since the black cat was already drowning in the softness of a pillow on your bed and sleeping. Much to suguru's dismay, satoru jumped on the bed to greet him and woke the poor cat up. They started to fight in a playful way, suguru's tiny paws hitting satoru's nose repeatedly.

You laughed at the scene, finding it kind of silly.

Soon after, you were already in bed with a dog sleeping soundly at your feet and a cat on the canine's tail, using it as some kind of pillow.

The sudden sound of scratching woke you up.

It came from your window, and you ignored it until it was unbearable. You angrily got up and rubbed your eyes while trying to find the light switch in the dark.

The sudden clarity hurt your eyes for a little until you got used to it, looking where the sound came. You thought that it was probably a bird or a branch being dragged by the wind and constantly bumping into your window, but it was not.

Something was there.

Something big.

Why didn't satoru bark? You looked around just to find not only he was gone, but suguru was nowhere to be seen too. It wasn't something new, sometimes it was too hot at bed and the pets went to the cold floor at some random room so you didn't really mind that. But still—

"Woof."

Was the sound coming from behind the window just now? You thought about it and got closer to it. The closer you got, the more you could picture the silhouette of a dog.

Okay, that had more sense.

"Toji?"

You said as soon as you opened the window. It was Toji, the stray dog you fed when he passed by.

He didn't have any owner, no home to go.

But he was fine, he didn't want any.

The times you opened your door for him to get in, he wouldn't. He liked you just because you gave him food, that's all. Sometimes he came with a few stains of blood on his dark furr but he wouldn't let you take care of him.

"You should choose better hours to ask for food, really. I don't think i have something left in the fridge, but let me give it a look."

The dog just barked again and sat down while you were gone looking for something good enough for him to eat.

That's what happened a few minutes ago now. You fed Toji and just like he always does, he left. Now you were going to your kitchen holding the dirty plate you used to feed the stray dog, careful not to wake your pets. You didn't know where they went, but your house isn't that big either so you can hear any loud sound even if you're in the furthest room.

"We need to tell her, Satoru. She will eventually find out, and you know that."

"Suguru, don't mess with me right now. You know what they say about us on TV! She will think we're liars and.."

The voices stopped talking as if they both knew what he was going to say next.

You froze.

You could feel your heart sink and your breath stop. Never in your life has someone broken into your home, and you only had a dirty plate that you were holding with a tight grip.

What was going to happen? Also, were your pets okay? Did they hide? Your mind raced with thoughts and doubts, not only worried by your safety but satoru's and suguru's too.

Wait.

Was it your pets' name you just heard them mention while talking to eachother?

𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓. 🌷

—𝗧𝗔𝗚𝗟𝗜𝗦𝗧

@kingshitonly @snake-lover-artist-blog @ashers-playpen

[ilikethisacompletelynormalamount]

Since Andrew is taking some well deserved time away from the public at the moment, let's revisit (or visit for the first time, if you're new here) this stunning photoshoot from Mr. Porter, October 2019, when he was doing press for Modern Love and his Ripley casting had just been announced (yes, it's taken that long for it to come out).

Mr Andrew Scott’s big brown eyes are open wide in amused disbelief. “That was not an Irish accent,” he says in his musical Irish brogue. “That was a West Country accent.” How embarrassing for an interviewer who thought to connect with her subject by lightly mocking Mr Ed Sheeran’s ­– again – not-Irish accent in his cameo in Mr Scott’s episode of Amazon’s upcoming anthology series, Modern Love. Panic sets in. “It’s all right,” he says, soothingly. “It’s all right. Accents are such funny things.”

You know what else is a funny thing? Sitting with Fleabag’s “hot priest” – 2019’s most unexpected sex symbol – in a wine bar in Bermondsey, southeast London, talking about vulnerability, romcoms and love stories. Or, to take another angle: sitting across the table from the deranged Jim Moriarty and letting him pick out a rosé. That tickles, too. Having Hamlet express the need for a mini-break in, he doesn’t know, Copenhagen? Amsterdam, maybe? Surreal.

But actually, Mr Scott, who is wearing what can only be described as a modified sweatsuit (shorts and a zip-up sweatshirt, no shirt beneath) after our photoshoot isn’t funny funny. No, Mr Scott is serious: reserved and contemplative, but with the energy of a theatre nerd who, every once in a while, rests his head in his hands, cupping his fingers around his eyes to form blinkers while he thinks about a question you’ve just asked. In this quiet wine bar. He’s not an evil murderer, an agent of a shadowy organisation, or an overly excited (wink) cleric. He’s just a nice guy who sympathises about the difficulty of parsing the subtleties of the many accents in the British Commonwealth (and beyond).

Mr Scott is still hot off his run in Fleabag, even though the show ran from March to April of this year. A few weeks ago, he received a GQ Men of the Year Award, and just a few weeks after that, was in Los Angeles at the Emmy Awards where Fleabag cleaned up, winning three awards.

Of course, this is not Mr Scott’s big break. He’s been in the business since moving from Dublin to London 20 years ago to pursue acting. His dad worked in employment, helping young people find the right careers and his mother was an art teacher. “They were definitely into following your passion and doing that for the rest of your life,” he says. “Rather than, ‘You should be a lawyer,’ or whatever the fuck.”

And this has been a year for Mr Scott’s passions. Aside from Fleabag, and an episode of Black Mirror that landed on Netflix this June, he’s making a poignant appearance in the aforementioned _Modern Love,_­ which will drop all at once on 18 October. A series of discreet episodes, each one features its own starry cast (Mr Dev Patel, Mr John Slattery, Ms Tina Fey, Ms Anne Hathaway and, of course, Mr Ed Sheeran, among others), based on the much-loved New York Times column from which it takes its name. Mr Scott’s episode, which co-stars Ms Olivia Cooke and Mr Brandon Kyle Goodman, is loosely based on an early column written by the sex-and-relationships writer Mr Dan Savage about the unusual experience he and his partner had with adoption. “It’s just a really sweet little story. It’s not about a romantic relationship,” he says, (many Modern Love entries are not). “It’s simply about the relationships between people.”

He’s also currently filming in Cardiff for the BBC TV series of His Dark Materials. And maybe there’s a Marvel movie in his future? “Oh, fuck. Completely false,” he says. “Someone said, ‘Are you going to be in a thing?’ I said, ‘No,’ and I said, ‘There have been discussions.’ And it’s like ‘Andrew Scott has been in discussions.’”

That’s what happens when suddenly everyone wants you – to use Twitter parlance – to run them over with your car. The Priest, unlike his other characters, was a sex symbol, one that wears the hell (forgive me, Father) out of a cassock. But who could be surprised that Mr Scott turned a priest into the “Hot Priest” simply by saying “kneel”? (If you don’t know what that means, stop reading now, watch the show, come back.) In fact, he has been making words positively drip with meaning for nearly a decade.

Consider Moriarty, the insane criminal puppet master Mr Scott played for six years across four seasons of the BBC’s Sherlock, opposite Mr Benedict Cumberbatch in the titular role. This particular Moriarty – Holmes’ famous nemesis, who has also been played by Messrs Orson Welles, John Huston and Sir Laurence Olivier – is indelible and utterly idiosyncratic. “If you’re going to do it, I don’t see there’s any point in doing it without putting your own stamp on it. I never look at any previous incarnations,” says Mr Scott. The result of this thinking – in Sherlock, at least – was a Moriarty who is all sing-song eeriness, molten physicality, and questionable cutaway collars. “He was quite theatrical; he was grotesque, sort of the archetypal villain,” he says. Archetypal, indeed: the role propelled him into the world of maniacal superfandom. He might not have received a dedicated stan nomenclature like his co-star (ahem, “Cumberbitches”), but the role made Mr Scott a household name.

Of course, establishing yourself as adept at playing evil incarnate probably leads to people wanting to cast you in more Moriarty-like roles. “Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yep, yeah,” he says, six times. “Yeah, exactly right,” (one more). “I turned down a lot. The shadow of that character took over for a little while.”  The craze got to be so tiresome that he asked the interviewer for a recent profile in The Guardian not to ask him about Moriarty at all (two years after he last appeared in the series). But now he sees a bigger picture, understands how being the object of abject obsession can be a good thing. “I think to answer your questions,” he says, tapping his fingers on the table, “it’s been really good fun.”

Mr Scott demurs when asked what it’s like to be the quencher of many thirsts on the internet. “People don’t say that to me. People don’t say, ‘Oh my God...” He shakes his head and trails off, perhaps in horror of what fans could be saying to him. It’s a little hard to believe that he wouldn’t be mobbed as he walks down the street. After all, one major British publication declared that Fleabag and the Priest were the only couple worth talking or tweeting about this year. (We guess Meghan and Harry, and Kim and Kanye can relax.)

“If I’m honest, it’s only really just starting to dawn on me, the global effect the show has had. People like a bit of transgression, they just do.” Any follower of his career, though, understands that it’s more than just good writing that makes him so very watchable (though good writing, is, politely, what he puts it down to). His chemistry is electric with Ms Phoebe Waller-Bridge, as it was electric with Mr Cumberbatch, and palpable even if you weren’t lucky enough to catch his rendition of Hamlet and – like this interviewer – had to watch a clip on YouTube.

Mr Scott’s character, Tobin, in Modern Love is the most subdued we might ever see him. There’s very little shouting, and none of the wide-eyed glaring that has defined his roles to date. Instead, he plays sweetly, quietly off a tiny baby, and tells goodnight stories to an adorable little girl. Perhaps this is a harbinger of softer roles to come. “I’d love to be in a romcom,” he says. “I love watching people fall in love, and how mad it is.” And yet: it was just announced that he will be playing Tom Ripley in a new adaptation of The Talented Mr Ripley. So much for avoiding the nutters.

“What always amazes me is how innocent we are as human beings,” he says, sidestepping yet another probing question about being so irresistible right now. “We are very easily manipulated by stories. If someone puts scary music behind someone and they’re told this person’s eyes are absolutely terrifying, you go: ‘Oh my God, that person is scary, and his eyes totally freak me out.’”

“But then,” he continues, “[you’re told] ‘the priest is hot, wait till you see him’. And then you look at his eyes in a very different way and it’s the manipulation of the storytelling. It literally changes your character.” Hmmm.

“The success is the writing,” he tries, again, to argue. But it’s hard to be convinced that an actor who’s hopped from one iconic character to another is simply lucky with writing. He sees he’s not getting anywhere and changes tack. “Acting is just a way of experimenting with different parts of myself. Vulnerability is something I’m really, really interested in. I think vulnerability is at the centre of every character I’ve ever played even if they don’t appear or present as vulnerable.”

Throughout this conversation, his eyes have flicked around the bar, and he pauses from time to time to comment on the other patrons. At one point, a woman is coughing so vehemently, he stops mid-sentence to remark, humorously, on whether she might be dying. Now, he spots something on the bar. “Oh my God, she’s reading Brené Brown.” We both turn to stare at the book.

“She writes a lot about vulnerability,” he explains, excited. “[Being vulnerable] is how you get ahead. I really, really strongly believe that. [Vulnerability is] strong, it’s really strong.”

Perhaps this is the secret we’ve been trying to distil about his appeal: Mr Scott uses vulnerability to bring us all into a space of fear or sadness or lust or anger with him so that every character he plays – whether it’s the hottest priest in London, a gay man in Brooklyn trying to become a father, or a murderous villain – thrums with the heartbreak that comes with being human.

“The more I work,” he continues, “the more I just think every story is in some way concerned with love – or the lack of it.” He smiles an earnest little smile and we both know this is the place to stop. “That’s the way life is,” he says. “It’s so fast and furious.”

https://www.mrporter.com/en-hk/journal/fashion/the-softer-side-of-mr-andrew-scott-1052122

[bersqunk]

#3OAK

3OAK AU :

So Brandy, Viva, and Poppy are sisters (Brandy having a different mom from Viva and Poppy) Peppy being a single father raising his daughters, but since they are low income troll family. The sisters start a girl group to help make some money with their music. It all started as a fun bonding time as a family, but soon Peppy gets over his head and gets money blinded and then he starts pushing his daughters to become perfect stars which creates a strain on the family harmony.

Contrary to Brozone the sisters have a very healthy relationship with each other an they're very supportive, but having Peppy be The controlling strict father.

♦️ Brandy and Peppy: He just wants her to focus on practicing her singing and writing new lyrics for the "family business", but since Brandy was the main vocalist Peppy had her practice more in singing. They would get into many arguments over how she is the only troll in her grade who can't date or hangout with friends after school. As the oldest she always watches out for her little sisters mainly Viva who sneaks out of the house, but soon it becomes there thing. Brandy loves poppy and spoils her with food and sweet treats (she hopes to have trolling herself one day)

♣️ Viva and Pepe: When Viva threw down some fantamazing moves in there first shows Peppy had her focus on choreography and having her hyping the audience for each show with her signature move "sugar rush". Viva fights with Peppy on how she doesn't want to be the "hyper one" 24/7 instead wants to relax in making candy bracelets, braid hair with friends, or even going to happy book club. Being the middle child she doesn't get much attention, but she uses it to her advantage in sneaking out to go hangout with friends (and book club get-togethers) in which Brandy helps her and become super duper close. Viva adores Poppy that whenever together their giggling over funny stories and hair braided to the max.

♥️ Poppy and Peppy: He originally he didn't want poppy in the spotlight, but with her sad puppy eyes wanting to join her sisters he just couldn't say no. Poppy being the baby of the group she didn't face any pressure like her sisters in singing or dancing, for any mistakes would just be passed as cute. As the youngest in the family she is surrounded by love from Peppy, Brandy, and Viva. She had no issues in being part of the girl group the opposite she had lots of fun, but when arguments ensued Poppy would secretly wish to go back like they use to be.

[cottoncandyjojo]

Watched @cj-does-va on his live stream sadly had stuff to do so I couldn’t watch all of it however him putting nightmare in cat headphones was hilarious to me sooo I had to draw it✨

(Sorry if you don’t like being @)

Nightmare made by Jokublog

Vid I’m referring to lol

Very funny check it out

[brainrot-goes-brrrrrr]

Savannah Squad Presentation Night Headcanons/Drabble [2/3]

it has been forever :'D (everyone say thank you to @moonbiine)

ANYWAYS, here's part 2 :}

Part 1: Taylor & Logan Part 2: Ben & Tyler Part 3: Aiden & Ashlyn [WIP]

Logan's POV

Two hours and twenty-eight minutes. It has been two hours and twenty-eight minutes and we've been stuck at 76% complete for forty minutes. Whoever made Windows deserves to burn and I stand by that, cause what do you mean that they can push an update and force restart my laptop.

"Logan when was the last time you updated this?" "Logan, why are there fifteen updates that need to be downloaded?" "Bro, when was the last time you actually shut down your laptop?" ... "I've been busy, okay--"

So it might be my fault. Partially. I will admit that much, but the laptop's never given me a problem before and it was running fine. It's just old, and has a few odd... kinks? I mean, the left half of the mousepad is jammed to the point where it can't click, and, sure, the screen does go black every now and again, but just hit it a few times it works! It's character, charm even (and I can't be bothered to fix it...)!

It was, honest to God, easier for Aiden to run back to his place and grab his laptop.

"So we agree that Logan is off electronic duty right?" Taylor had asked as Ben was setting up the other computer to the television screen with Aiden helping. It was a unanimous decision. Ben and Aiden are the new tech guys.

"Yeah, that's probably for the better," I had conceded.

Ben Clarke

Ben goes next because he saved the groups sanity by suggesting that Aiden just gets his laptop. Everyone, thank Ben for the night not failing.

To address the obvious, Ben has a text to speech app on his phone, which is connected to a speaker, that he uses to present. I will say that there is a sort of humor in this for two reasons. One, the voice can either be monotoned like a typical text-to-speech program with funny pronunciation errors, or two, it will sound like one of those videos on tiktok where an AI is reading a tumblr post about SuperBats or something and gets progressively more expressive as time goes on. Personally, I want to hear exasperated robot Ben voice explaining to Aiden why "Life is a Highway" on repeat can and will be considered a torture method.

Ben's music taste is GODLY. And he's more of a eclectic listener too so he has experience with a good amount of genres. This man does not bash other genres of music that he doesn't care for, he thinks its rude to the person he's talking to and to the artist.

Aiden is the exception to this rule^^

DESPISES having to subscribe to music platforms. What do you mean that you can't listen to a song on repeat without paying, what do you mean that you will interrupt his carefully crafted playlist with a recommended song that does not fit the vibe. This end up derailing his presentation couple times.

He has a set criteria that he judges on: length, vibes, transitions, and replayability. Good playlists should at minimum be an hour, have similar vibes/sound while still being unique, the transitions between songs shouldn't be jarring, and the playlist shouldn't be painful to listen to after a month.

Taylor and Ashlyn helped him judge everyone's playlists by acting as secondary perspectives. Taylor is more open to everyone's music tastes while Ashlyn scrutinizes them more. They pretty much just took a playlist that everyone listens to regularly, one that they made but listen to it every so often, and their liked songs.

I would also like everyone to remember that the series is set in 2016... they would have songs mostly from the 2000s-2010s with the exceptions of some 90s and 80s songs. I'm not saying that's a bad thing, I'm just saying that I looked up 2010s hit songs and I'm filled with nostalgia.

Overall, Ben's criticisms and recommendations are genuinely thoughtful. Especially the recommendations. For each person, after critiquing their playlists, Ben made a slide of genres and artists that each person should check out to expand their tastes.

(I'll probably make a bit about what songs were on their playlist, idk tho)

Group Reaction (how they ranked in comparison to each other)

Personally, Tyler and Logan getting the best ratings because their playlists are very consistent in their vibes and are replayable. I also think that Ben's music taste fits the most with these two for some reason, so they got the most song recs out of everyone.

Ashlyn is third in the ranking. She has one or two that she listens to occasionally, and they're pretty short. They are absolute polar opposites though. One of the playlists is rock, since she canonically likes Paramore (if you don't, get well soon), and the other is classical music for her ballet performances.

Taylor is next. Her playlist isn't bad, its just... a bit everywhere. Like it starts pretty good, but you can tell that somewhere along the lines of creating this playlist she just added songs that she remembered that she likes. It mostly fits the same genre. Ben makes her a more organized playlist after the presentation.

Aiden is dead last. It's not because his music taste is shit. Aiden actually has a pretty good music taste. No. Its because he only listens to his liked songs on repeat like a monster. It is musical whiplash. You go from a movie theme song, to crying, to listening to white girl club music, to rock, to crying again, and then for some reason the Home Depot jingle???? The only playlists that he makes are for jokes really. Do you know the John Mulaney bit where he plays "What's New Pussycat?" 27 times. Yeah, that's Aiden.

Tyler Hernandez

Tyler's next, and, I'm letting you know now that he sprayed the fuck out of Aiden for interrupting. Yeah, Ash pulled them a part.

Motherfucker is so pleased with himself, like its honestly so funny. Aiden had him by the collar and Tyler was just fucking smiling. Taylor does throw her slipper at him for being rude, but he could honestly care less.

The slideshow itself is the most soulless thing ever made, man used the Blank Google Slides template and called it a day. Like one stock image on each slide, and its so pixelated. He probably did it like an hour ago. That's why his presentation is funny because he's just jabbing at Aiden over and over with a basic slideshow that you'd see someone pull out in a Spanish 1-2 class.

You know what? He probably had another presentation about what piercing he think would suit the group best, and just did this one out of spite cause Aiden was being loud. I take back my previous statement about him doing it an hour before getting to Logan's place, he did this on his PHONE WHEN THE LAPTOP WAS UPDATING!!!! Like Logan was taking a walk, Ben was trying to fix the computer, the girls went to make sandwiches, Aiden was running errands, and Tyler made this in an hour.

His presentation is based off a tier system where it gets more effective with each method. Methods 1-3 are pretty basic where its just stuff like duct taping his mouth shut, 4 and onwards just gets funny

I'll be completely honest, each way he put is wild, and it gets progressively more deranged as the presentation goes on. These one's my favorite

"Number 9: Dying You know, I thought this would be the best way, but the bastard got crushed by a ceiling and walked it off. I want you to try and convince me that Aiden wouldn't crawl out of hell just to ruin my day. " "Number 10: Put him in a room alone with Ashlyn's mom and dad *insert a picture of Aiden sitting not so comfortably in between Ashlyn's parents* I don't even think I need to say anything else, I mean, I will, but like... look at him"

This is honestly the shortest presentation of the night but so far it's the most chaotic (he will quickly lose this title).

Tyler went through two spray bottles, mainly for Aiden, but he did spray Taylor once or twice. She threw a shoe at him. It's only fair.

Groups Reaction

Aiden is standing to the side with a towel around himself because Logan said his grandparents would kill them for ruining their couch. He's not exactly pissed but he is kind of sulking. Honestly this just makes his presentation so much better for him.

You know how Tyler asked for suggestions in the beginning, Ben and Ashlyn give him genuine ideas. Mainly Ben, just out of good humor you know. And Tyler's taking notes.

Taylor is giggling, but she does feel a bit bad for Aiden. At some point she gives him a consolation sandwich to raise his spirits.

Logan, however, doesn't and he's just quietly enjoying the scene that's unfolding around him.

The end of these two presentations are by far more chaotic than the first two, and it feels like its only going to get worse from here(/pos). Because right now Aiden is fighting with Tyler, getting him soaked too, Taylor is filming them while Logan provides commentary, and Ashlyn is standing with Ben setting up the next powerpoint.

While it was initially decided that Aiden would go last, Ashlyn suggested that she and him switch. Mainly so that he can drip dry while presenting, and sit down when he's done.

Aiden is following a presentation that was just jabbing at him, how do you think his is going to end up now?

[literary-motif]

Xanthus ans listener PLEASE I need their first time. Their first time love after knowing each other for months. Xanthus being so needy he waits till Dontis leaves his own house so he can overstimulate listener as they watch a movie… and yk how the love making ends

Sweet Love (NSFW)

Xanthus Claiborne x Reader

If you think he didn’t catch all the shy glances you sent his way, you would be mistaken. 

Xanthus took note of them all. Your dilated pupils and the slight hitch in your breath when your eyes met nearly drove him insane, desperate to lean closer and kiss you until you were left breathless. But alas, that would be improper.

Dontis had been kind enough to welcome you warmly into his home in New Orleans. Although Xanthus longed to be back in England, in his own mansion where he could do as he pleased without regard for the proper etiquette of being a guest, with the current situation, that was impossible. 

From the way you lingered a moment longer than what would be considered casual when he kissed you, to the sly smiles you sent his way, and biting your lip discreetly when his burning gaze settled on you, he knew you were yearning for this just as much as he was. 

The constant pull of your desires was only increased by the bond, made tangible through it and riling Xanthus up just enough that he considered throwing propriety to the wind and giving in. A look at your content face, the barest whisper of your sweet voice, was enough to discard that idea immediately. 

No, he wanted to do this right. Xanthus longed to do this properly. He had no intention of settling for muffled moans and choked-off whispers, needing to silence all the beautiful sounds you made so Dontis would not hear. That would not do. Xanthus wanted to hear you, plucking every sweet noise from you to the fullest until he had memorized them all. He wanted to give you as much pleasure as you could take, watch you closely as you came undone beneath him again and again until every thought of danger, the mission, the Trimedian was wiped from your mind and all that was left was his name, tumbling from your lips in a never-ending chant of ecstasy.

So he resigned himself to waiting, stopping your seemingly innocent advances immediately — trailing your hand over his thigh, nibbling on the sensitive spot under his ear, running your hand through his hair, and tugging gently — although his own impatience was eating him up from the inside out. 

Either Dontis had grown tired of the constant hints Xanthus would drop to get him out of the house — “Lovely day, isn’t it? Why don’t you check on that hunter friend of yours and take them for a nice, long walk?” — or he had finally become annoyed by the constant push and pull between you and Xanthus, the sizzling tension almost painful to watch as it seemed to take more and more effort for you to keep your hands off of each other. 

It had been funny at first. Dontis loved to tease Xanthus after all, pretending that he did not catch the hints and thinly veiled requests as he told Xantus that his ‘hunter friend’ was busy and he would much rather catch some rest in his home than go out. 

He knew Xanthus, and he knew what he desperately longed to do once he was alone with his love. Not that he minded, but it amused him greatly to see both of you squirm as your eyes met, Xanthus stilling your casual caresses again because every little thing was fueling his desire. 

Still, Dontis had seen Xanthus fight the expression of disappointment and slight annoyance from appearing on his face one too many times now, and this game had grown pitiful. 

“I’m going out,” he declared, stepping into the living room and fixing his shirt collar. Despite not being one for plans, he had made an exception to meet up for dinner with his hunter and dressed prettily for the occasion. 

Xanthus’ eyes widened. You perked up as well, turning your attention away from the black-and-white movie playing on the TV and towards Dontis.

“I don’t expect to be back before morning,” he said casually, checking his appearance in the mirror for the last time before glancing your way with a smirk. “Enjoy yourselves.”

“You too,” you called after him, immediately caught off by Xanthus’ lips on yours as the door closed behind Dontis, leaving you both alone in his mansion. 

“My love,” Xanthus murmured between kisses, wrapping his arms around you to pull you closer and deepen the kiss. You shifted on the couch to face him properly, roaming your hands over his white dress shirt before tangling them in his hair and looping your arms around his neck.

You had both waited so long for this. Now that you were finally able to satiate the desire that had been building steadily for weeks, it felt almost too good to be true.

“My love,” Xanthus whispered, lowering you slowly into the cushions until you were lying on your back, arms still wrapped around his neck as he continued kissing you against the couch. 

You moaned into the kiss, shifting a little until Xanthus was between your legs and you could wrap them around his waist, pulling his body against yours. He groaned, feeling his hard cock rubbing against you. It was aching already, and you had barely begun. 

“I wanted to ask if there is anything special you would like to do while we are alone,” he teased, kissing the corner of your mouth before he began nibbling on your neck, peppering wet kisses all over it. When reaching just below your ear, he whispered, “But I think that question resolved itself.”

Xanthus’ warm breath against your ear made you shiver. You could feel the satisfied smile on his lips when he continued kissing your neck, trailing lower and making you gasp as he left marks where he knew you could cover them up. 

Sighs escaped as he continued marking you, and you began rocking your hips, clenching your legs around his waist to make him grind on you. Xanthus moaned, melting against you as you tugged on the strands of hair at the base of his neck. 

“Feeling good?” you asked teasingly, tilting his head up so you could look into his blissful expression. 

He chuckled, leaning up to kiss you again. “I’d feel better with less fabric between us, love,” he said, hands roaming across your chest before lifting the hem of your shirt slightly. “Wouldn’t you agree?” 

You unwrapped your legs from around him, making quick work of your garments as Xanthus loosened the first few buttons of his shirt before giving up and pulling it over his head instead. 

“Impatient, are we?” you chuckled as he pushed you back into the cushions, spread out and naked under him. “Need help with that?” you asked, running a hand over his thigh, inching higher to the bulge in his pants. 

“You’ll help me soon enough,” he said, pulling down his pants and discarding them on the floor with the rest of your clothing before freeing his achingly hard cock. Xanthus leaned over you again, trailing a single fingertip from your lips, over your chest, and lower until he was right where you needed him most, teasing your hole. “For now, allow me to make you feel good.”

You moaned, rocking your hips impatiently. You were burning with need, and his drawn-out teasing drove you insane. “Xanthus, please,” you begged, pouting at his cruel game. 

“Pleading already, love?” he teased, slipping his finger in and making you groan. He leaned down, leaving wet kisses on your exposed chest and stomach as he added a second finger, working you open for his cock. “I’ve barely begun.”

“Xanthus— ah—” you gasped, arching your back as he picked up the pace, angling his fingers until he brushed against a spot that made your thighs tremble. You were unraveling fast, nearing your high from his fingers alone pumping in and out of you, and if it weren’t for the determination and burning desire mixing in his eyes as he looked at you, it would have embarrassed how quickly you were coming. “Mhm— if you keep— yesyesyes, right there. Don’t stop— ah—”

You could feel how pleased he was through the tilt of his lips against your skin. He had not stopped watching you intently, cataloging every twitch, every expression of pleasure on your face to keep the memory of you coming undone underneath him tucked in his mind forever. Feeling your walls clench around his fingers made his mouth water, patience finally running out as he burned to sheathe his cock inside you. 

He pulled out his fingers, allowing you to catch your breath. “Feeling alright?” he asked, brushing your hair back from your forehead and looking at you affectionately. You nodded, a shudder running through you as your eyes landed on his cock, precum already leaking from it.

“Fuck,” you cursed, mouth watering at the idea of Xanthus thrusting into you. “Come on, I’m tired of waiting,” you said, spreading your legs further. His eyes flickered down for a moment, looking at you carefully, exposed in front of him, and he groaned, not needing to be told twice. 

“Tell me if it hurts,” he requested, lining himself up, the feeling of his cock brushing against your entrance nearly overwhelming him already. He pushed in slowly, carefully not to hurt you as he stretched you out on his cock. You choked, wrapping your arms around his neck again to hold onto him as he entered you fully. 

Xanthus panted, not daring to move as your warmth wrapped around him was nearly enough to send him spiraling. You were clutching him tightly, moans and whimpers falling from your lips unabashedly as you grew used to the stretch. They only made him want to ravish you further. 

With a needy rock of your hips and a lewd whine, you told him to move, and Xanthus began thrusting slowly, relishing the breathless sounds you made as his cock filled you up to the brim. “Tell me if I get too rough,” he said, kissing your neck again, feeling the thumping of your heart under his lips. “Tell me if—”

“I’m fine,” you whispered, kissing the side of his face, “don’t worry— ah— I’m good. Keep going. Ah!— I love you,” you moaned as Xanthus picked up the pace, dragging his cock in and out of you with more vigor until you were writhing under him again, close to your release. “Wouldn’t trade this for the— ah— world. No— mhm— matter the mission and—”

Xanthus silenced you with a kiss, adamant about making you forget the danger hanging over your heads. “Don’t think about that now,” he panted, “I love you too” — your walls clenching around him and your twitching fingers pulling at his hair telling him that you were close again — “I love you so much.” He groaned, his own pleasure nearly at its zenith as his cock twitched inside of you. “Let go, love. I’m there, too.”

You came with a cry of his name, digging your nails into his back as you fell apart. Xanthus continued thrusting, riding out your pleasure for as long as he could until you were twitching from overstimulation. 

“Did you like that?” he asked after catching his breath, cupping your face and kissing your lips. “Would you care to give me one more?” 

You whined, shuddering at the thought of going again, but nodded your head, unable to satiate your desire for him as Xanthus began trailing kisses over your neck, making you moan. “Yeah,” you breathed, throwing your head back in pleasure as his cock entered you once more. “Keep going, please.”

He hummed, lifting your legs over his shoulders to thrust deeper inside you. The new angle stole your breath, the tiredness of having come twice already overshadowed by the desire Xanthus elicited in you. 

“Mghm— you’re so deep— ah—” you moaned, clutching the cushions of the couch to keep yourself anchored against the roll of his hips. “Fuck, Xanthus— ah!— can’t—” 

Xanthus kept going, edged on by the expression of pure bliss on your face as his cock brushed against the furthest parts of you. “Be good now,” he chided teasingly, voice breathless from how tight you were around him. “I know you can take it, my love,” he groaned, splitting you open on his cock as his hands caressed the insides of your thighs. 

“Mhm, Xanthus—” you whined as he placed his palms on your hips, keeping you steady and making sure he was not fucking you into the cushions too harshly. “Oh, Xanthus— gonna— mhm—”

“Close again?” he asked, leaning down to kiss your forehead as he felt you clenching around him. The feeling of your tightness and the sight of the daze of pleasure evident in your eyes made him groan, his grip on your waist tightening as he thrust his cock faster. “That’s right. You’re doing so well, love,” he panted, trembling a little as his own pleasure built steadily. 

The stutter of your breath and your hands fisted the cushions told him that you were about to tumble over the edge, and he could not hold on any longer as you clenched around him, falling apart with his name on your lips. His hips stilled after a long moment, making sure you were whimpering and squirming again before he pulled out, loosening the deathgrip you had on the cushion and bringing your hands to his lips to kiss them gently.

“Xan— uh—” you mumbled, entirely fucked out as you slowly calmed down. Your head was spinning, warmth engulfing your whole body. You felt Xanthus slowly kissing your neck again. “‘S enough, Xan. Can’t anymore—” 

He chuckled, laying down next to you and cupping your cheek to place a chaste kiss against your lips. “Alright, love. You did so well,” he praised, slipping an arm around you and drawing you into his side, “How are you feeling? Do you need anything?” 

You looked at him through heavy eyelids, nuzzling into his side. “Fine. Need a moment,” you breathed, burying your head against his shoulder until your heartbeat stopped drowning out the movie still playing in the background. Raising your head, you rested your chin on his chest and chuckled fondly. “Look,” you said, nodding towards the TV, “We didn’t find out who the murderer was.”

“Oh, it was the vampire,” Xanthus said nonchalantly, kissing the top of your head. Reaching for the remote, he turned off the movie just as the evil vampire was about to sink his teeth into his screaming victim. “Quite a misrepresentation, if you ask me. Anyway, care for a bath? I’ll take care of everything, don’t worry.”

“In a minute,” you replied, leaning up to kiss his lips again. “You haven’t truly tasted me yet, my love.”

Xanthus rolled his eyes in amusement. “What ideas has this movie given you?” he teased, but his expression grew genuine after a moment. “You’re tired. I don’t want to strain you too much after everything we did.”

“I’m fine, truly,” you said, laying on your back, making sure Xanthus was facing you as you exposed your neck for him. “Finish your meal, love.”

[blarshwritezz]

PPHI AGAIN its yours truly the anon with the ungodly amount of typos ken i just ask like a fic wuth the spy reader x mafia boss but its just the mafia boss in denial about his feelings for the reader? and funny interactions of the reader's mom and the mafia boss (she doesn't know about the reador or the mafia boss's occupation so they just hide it by saying their co workers in a normal office job and the reader gets called a mama's bou by the oc ty again)

typos hmm.. yummy😋😋😋

🦀

How cute!

Yandere Mafia Boss x Spy Reader p3

M yan x M reader

TW - general yandere behavior

Part 1 - Part 2

"And who's this handsome young man, sweetie? Your new boyfriend?" Your mom asked, pinching his cheek. If only she knew this man was one of the most dangerous in the country.

But it was a pretty complicated question. What was he exactly? You couldn't exactly tell her he was holding you hostage. That would only worry her. But you couldn't confidently say he was your boyfriend as he might get angry. You've asked him what you were before, but his answer was vague and he quickly changed the subject.

"Well um, he's my-"

"Business partner." He cut you off. Even in front of your mother his cold and menacing aura didn't waver, but she didn't seem to mind.

"Sure. Purely business. I totally believe that." She winked and chuckled a bit, letting go of your cheek. "Well don't just stand there. You two come in, get comfortable. I'll bring in some water."

Your mother left to the kitchen, letting you two sit down. He kept an arm around you possessively, trapping you between him and the arm of the sofa.

You were actually rather shocked that he agreed to let you come here. According to him, the less people were looking for you the better. But it almost seemed like he had some other motive.

Almost.

Because he did. He had to grow close to your family and find out what they were like. Not because he wanted them to be his in-laws, of course not! Just so he knew what kind of leverage he had against you.

"Alright darlin's, here's some water!" Your mom re-entered the room, seething down three glasses of iced water. One for you, him, and herself. "Now tell me, what's going on with my baby? You never call anymore!"

"There's been an important project at work. We've hardly gotten any free time." He covered for you. It wasn't surprising how he could easily come up with these things. He was able to lie so easily.

"Oh sweetie, please tell me you've been taking care of yourself."

"Don't worry ma'am. Your son is being very well taken care of."

Did he have to sound so sexy saying that?! There was no need for him to make it sound like the two of you were shaking up. Well, you were, but your mom didn't need to know that!

"Now sweetie, why isn't this kind man your husband yet?"

"Ma!" You exclaimed at your mother's sudden question, your face turning beet red. You could have sworn you saw a small smile and a light dusting of pink over his cheeks, but he stayed composed.

That was just the beginning of the night. It was filled with laughter, joy, and your mom embarrassing you more times than you could count. You swear she was doing it on purpose!

But you really did love nights like this. Nights when you could just forget time was passing and relax. Have a good, home-cooked meal and share time with the closest people to you.

"You know," He spoke, placing a hand on your thigh as he drove the two of you home. "you're such a mama's boy."

You let out a small chuckle and looked out the window, met with darkness broken by old streetlights. "Yeah...I guess I am."

Feels like it's been too long since I've written something SFW, thank you 🦀 anon 😭

[haikyu-mp4]

Monster

word count; 979 – gn!reader who is shorter than Tendo

I had the idea to write two different reactions depending on the reader being either more extroverted or more introverted, feel free to read both or either option:)

It was raining outside, which made your little stroll to the vending machine all the more pleasurable. The sound of the little raindrops falling on the buildings, lawn and concrete was quite therapeutic. All because you were under a roof, of course, you were not as excited to cross the lawn in a minute to meet your boyfriend after his volleyball practice in this weather. Typical of you to never bring an umbrella.

You put in some coins, clicked the button and crouched down to pick up your strawberry milk before straightening up again and turning back around. Annoyingly enough, you were met with a startling wall. Two guys were standing a bit too close to just be in line for the machine, and the looks in their eyes were mischievous in a bad way. It’s the kind of eyes people say Tendo has even though all you ever see in them is endearment.

“You’re the one dating that monster, aren’t you?” one of the guys said while the other one huffed as if it was funny.

Tough extroverted reader

“Can I help you?” you asked back with a confused expression, not seeing any reason why you’d discuss your dating life with these guys. You opened the milk and took a sip before tilting your head to await their answer.

“We should be asking you that. Someone so pretty stuck with such a freak. What’s he threatening you with?” The guy kept talking, truly stepping on thin ice. You scrunched your nose and took another sip, not exactly comfortable with the situation but not wanting to leave without defending your boyfriend either.

“You jealous or something? I’ll let you know I’m perfectly happy with my dating life.” You take a step closer to the guy who apparently did all the barking. “And his name is Tendo Satori,” you said in a clear voice as if trying to burn the name into their brains. If they were going to call him a monster, it better be because of how he rules the volleyball court. You had half a mind to tell them that as well, but the moment was interrupted.

Their eyes were slowly cast in a shadow before they could respond. If only you could see the reflection in their eyes of your boyfriend’s smirk behind you. “That was pretty hot.” Tendo finally says after letting you answer them yourself. It startled you a little, before relaxing into his touch stroking down your arm. You leaned your shoulders back on his chest, a cocky smile on your face from watching the other guys lose their confidence. Tendo leaned down and obnoxiously kissed your cheek to make a point before lifting a hand towards the boys and shooing them away. “You heard them.”

“Whatever, weirdos.” They put on some tough faces that weren’t very believable, and you turned around to Satori while they scurried away. Being weirdos together definitely wasn’t that bad.

“Satorii,” you purred, happy to see him.

“I’m sorry you had to deal with that. Again.” He said, obviously trying to be aloof about it, but you could see through it.

“I’m sorry too,” you said with a soft smile, knowing he knew what you meant, before grabbing his hand and tip-toeing to peck his cheek. “I thought I was meeting you?”

“I know you didn’t bring an umbrella,” he answered, finally showing a genuine smile. “My dorm? I’ll make you something sweet.”

“Yes, my prince.”

Soft introverted reader

You felt your pulse quicken with angst, eyes not meeting theirs but rather desperately hoping someone you know would pass by. “Can I help you?” you asked carefully, wishing that if they had to talk about your boyfriend behind his back, they would do it behind yours too. A blind person could see you were not the confronting type.

“We should be asking you! What kind of freak are you to be dating that?” he said, a cruel comment that didn’t make the situation any more comfortable.

“I don’t think that’s any of your business,” you mumbled, avoidant as ever. Why would they care about your dating life anyway?

“Won’t you at least look at us with those pretty eyes, monster-lover?” the other one said, taking an unwelcomed step closer.

“He's not a monster,” you said, making an attempt at defending your boyfriend but still feeling tears brim your eyes from the confrontation.

Finally, you saw your salvation, like a stream of light finally peering through the clouds and hitting your face. The two boys were about to turn around when they saw your eyes lock on something between them, but were stopped as Tendo grabbed each of their shoulders and pulled them back, giving you space to breathe. “But I can be... if you ever make them cry,” he said in a goofy albeit frightening voice. His eyes crept from one boy to the other as if making sure the threat sank in before passing them and taking your hand to lead you away. He pressed a kiss to your knuckles while you walked before letting your hand go so he could open his umbrella and hold it above you. “I’m sorry you had to deal with that,” he said softly, trying to seem like he didn’t care about himself, just that you had to hear it.

“It’s okay. They were being shitheads anyways,” you huffed, anger seeping in now that you didn’t have to face them anymore.

“Ooh, language, baby.” Tendo laughed and looked down at you with adoration flowering in his eyes.

“Shut up,” you giggled, pushing your shoulder into his before tucking your arm around his closest arm so you could walk together even if he held the umbrella. Safe to say that anger dissipated quickly.

“I’ll treat you to some A-class cuddles for standing up for me like that. My dorm?”

“Yes, my love.”

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