#this is all /affectionate

[purrassicjet]

The Bad Boys are so lame without the Bad Girls is so fucking hilarious. Riz suggests that they throw stones in the river. Everybody keeps thinking Gorgug is injured. Fabian cuts a catantelope in half and tries to eat it.

[philzokman]

hey guys so the real reason why fyodor didn’t drown was actually because of science! oil and water don’t mix and so his body was able to create a shield from the amount of grease he had built up over the years thus protecting him from the water coming within a 10 mile radius of him hope that helps <33

[wrenqueenisboss]

ryker: i really miss wren. i’m so sad she’s gone

wren: i was just afk for a bit dumbass (/affectionate

ryker: sometimes i can still hear her voice

@ze-maki-nin

[brainrotcharacters]

the easy grip on the knife. the leg over the seat. the hand over the other seat. the sassy "come get it" move. you know the bitch is smiling behind that mask even as he said the line.

[kikipuff]

Kevin, leaning over Seth’s coffin: how could you do this to us, we’re so short staffed.

[xxcrystalinerose]

Going back to Zag's romantic relationships from Mel is extremely hilarious to me because of how comparatively well-adjusted he was.

Sure he done fucked up with Meg in the past and they had to kill each other as part of the job description, his sudden leaving seriously hurt Than while also having communication issues w/ each other, and there's the matter of Dusa being a lowly servant of the House. But in the end, he sorted everything out with 0 grievances from all parties involved (that one dialogue where Than admits Meg is the one who tells him to finally pursue Zag seriously warms my heart). Got the Mom(s) Seal of Approval™ even, and from Achilles too!

Meanwhile I look at Melinoë and she has a frankly criminal amount of situationships. Her rizz level is insane and she goes straight for the throat when flirting yet somehow her dating life is simultaneously a mess and nonexistent. Nemesis regularly kicks her into the dirt verbally AND physically but is the only person to acknowledge how fucked up it is that Mel is sent out alone in the hopes of killing an all powerful Titan that took SIX gods to kill in the past. "Fuck you and fuck your stupid frog in particular" then turns around and gives free Death Defiances. Her and Moros try to flirt with each other but they kept missing the mark because sometimes one of them says something totally unhinged like it was normal (I don't think watching people die is an appropriate bathtime conversation topic, my man). Her and Eris are a hot mess—literally with all those rounds she shot at Mel AND without a basis of workplace professionalism. Icarus is one shot nerve away from accidentally proclaiming his undying (literally) love to her but his guilt complex is hanging on to that nerve. And then there's Arachne and her not so little crush warring with the fact that said crush is family with and is helping the gods who cursed her.

Never have I realized how important it is that Zag has become a minor god of relationship counselling until I look at his baby sister and think, "yeah girl you definitely need help for all that shit".

[sopping-wet-cat]

idiot *kicks her into a wall and hits her with a rubber hammer*

[tubbytarchia]

so ranchers huh

[benevolenterrancy]

"If the original novel had given this thing more than ten words of description, there was no way he wouldn’t have remembered!"

[abnormalpsychology]

[mipexch]

i love animating these little freaks

[sully-s]

He deserves it

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt 271

“Grandmother is visiting,” Damian suddenly said with no warning and with his usual not-quite demanding tone. 

“Who?” Tim wasn’t the only one to startle, seeing as Bruce had practically froze, a downturn to his lips in a silent show of confusion. 

Damian scowled. “Are you deaf Drake? Grandmother is coming to Gotham to, quote, make sure I am being properly cared for.” None of them had known that Ras was with anyone actually. At least Tim was pretty sure that would have been in the files. 

“Oh?” Dick didn’t quite crouch to Damian’s height but it was a near thing. “She-” “He,” Damian corrected, interrupting him. They all exchanged a glance before Dick continued. 

“Is he coming to the Manor or…” 

Damian scoffed again, a tiny bit of a flush against his face. “No, Grandmother will most likely be staying with Akhi-”

Now wait one moment-

“YOU HAVE ANOTHER BROTHER?!” 

[haveihitanerve]

Ok so, idea. Damian says ‘i love you’ as a sort of goodbye/thank you. Like for example “This evidence will prove very useful on this case, I love you Todd.” or “this photo of Titus is most adequate Drake, I shall have enough to start drawing. I love you.” or “The meal was most delicious Pennyworth, I love you.” And everyone coos and is like “aww.” even jason and they look at dick because like obviously dick taught damian that, hes the golden child, the one damian looks up to the most, the most affectionate one…

But the truth is, Damian learned it from Bruce. Damian is there when Bruce calls his other kids, he hears Bruce go “I love you.” As a goodbye the second after the child at the other end hangs up. He hears Bruce say ‘i love you’ to alfred, quietly, when hes patching him up after a mission, hears the frantic ‘i love you’s’ after someone gets hurt on patrol, and he thinks thats how its done. But Bruce seems to think the same as everyone else, that he got it from Dick, and Dick looks so pleased, Damian decided not to correct them. Besides, who do they think Dick got it from?

[brainrotcharacters]

Mothers and fuckers of the ketchup and mustard household (I'm going even more insane than usual)

[lazycranberrydoodles]

hua cheng's patience: infinite

hua cheng's impulse control: zero