#this is also something for myself cause I’m tired of trying to find a big list and not getting one

[roseytoesy]

Vore trope list

Screw it I’ve been looking for a list of vore tropes and stuff and can’t seem to find any! so you know what I’m going to make my own.

(Almost all of these I imagine as safe or has the option to be safe.)

Feel free to use this as an ask game too!

Story tropes:

Knight in shining armor (protection vore)

A heroic meal (protection vore but eating the bad guy)

Dragons sacrifice (poor soul(s) offered to a monster)

A bet (stupid idea + pride leads to shenanigans)

Feral/ lost to instincts (pred looses control of themselves)

Oh no you don’t! (Pred keeping prey from doing something stupid)

Tummy time out (prey annoyed/upset pred too much and ended in tummy as punishment)

Extreme cuddling (just as it says. both wanna be cozy together and what better way than inside a tum?)

dentist (thorough cleaning but with its own risks of being eaten due to being within a mouth)

vore spa day (covered in delicious smelling oils and products and given a deep massage deep into a pred)

magic! (Potions or spells making this small and safe)

sci-fi (aliens and other biological/scientific shenanigans leading to vore)

willingly “sacrificed” to a god

food play (from noodles to cakes and icecream get creative and have fun!)

Saved from drowning (merfolk or lifeguard making sure someone gets the air they need inside where they will be safe)

fearful (I don’t like the sound of fearplay)

cat and mouse games (pred having fun while the prey may or may not, depending)

hide and eat (hide and seek but the seeker is very hungry~)

Any taur vore (from nagas to centaurs, to driders, to anything you can think of!)

multiple stomaches (a safe one/storage and one not so safe one maybe)

slimes (pred or prey they can be both!)

edible clones (best way to remove extras is to eat them!)

high vore (they either got high from the prey or the pred was high and got munchy)

dinner dates (ending with an amazing prey dessert to finish off a successful date)

inexperienced/first time (weather it’s pred or prey is so good)

shy (either pred or prey struggle to ask.)

casual (just walk up to friend and say I want in. Or can I have a snack for a bit. Shrug and relax for an hour or two)

kidnapping (best way to ensure transportation and that they won’t get away)

object vore (from a small key to a fricken box tv. The bulges are always a fun plus)

Come and get it~ (pred ate item/person prey needs so they have to go down to get it)

sick (pred needs something to settle their stomach, or prey wants to hide away from the world and their troubles.)

comfort (help ground a pred during a panic attack. Help hide prey from anxieties)

A different form of love (other species licking and gently swallowing their loved ones as signs of affection.)

healing vore (stomach juices heal things alive and break apart anything dead.)

tough soft guy. (Scary/intimidating with a soft spot for one special prey.)

multiple prey (weather the pred was gluttonous or overwhelmed both are good.)

super willing and unwilling (pred excited to nom someone and they are not ok with it. And a super willing prey where the pred is somewhat worried/freaked out)

VIP (very important prey, gets a nice backstage show ending in a belly.)

sleep eating (pred had a nice dream about eating a marshmallow. Where’s their pillow/prey??)

another world (maybe somewhere where this is normal)

betrayal (prey gets gobbled up by friend and feels betrayed that they were nothing more than a meal/snack to who they thought they could trust.)

always close (pred hugging belly close or always having a hand over their precious cargo)

experiments! (Scientists doing things inside just because they are curious!)

overprotective (either pred or prey but they are possessive of their friend they aren’t allowed to be eaten by/eat anyone else!)

teasing (being charismatic or using double meaning words to get a snack or message across~)

domestic (a happy couple/ roommates sharing some nomes after cleaning together or getting things settled from the days adventures.)

robot (safely store items and prey at optimal temperatures and in a safe environment until threat has passed, or scans are completed, etc)

mine! (Hoarding things where NOONE can get to without their permission)

strings/equipment included (keeping prey on something to help them get out, though it may or may not fail depending on the pred)

demons deal (you got what you want and what they want in return is a nice meal~)

drink addition (prey floating in a drink and going down to their own special pool)

hot and cold (hot belly’s for cold days and cool belly’s for hot days)

It was an accident! (Took a tumble right down someone’s throat?! Or they didn’t notice someone in their drink)

Other:

Same size

half size

g/t

micro

cat size

willing

unwilling

squirming

switch

pred

prey

reformation

goopy/ painless digestion

fatal/perminant

oral

belly mouth

tail

Vore to endosoma

Half/full tour clean

dream vore

energy sapping

bulging stomach

hammer space stomach/ pocket dimension belly

[princeofyorkshire]

sigh

[sugarpasteltmnt]

I've been compleatly OBSSESED with neon void so far!!! It's by far my favorite fic of any I've read!! After every chapter I have to take a second to do the happy stimmies because you write all of the scenes so well. Whenever I see a new update I clear the next hour for reading it and the subsequent geek out sesion for how AMAZING it always is. You write extremely well, you convey the characters so acurately, the fight scenes are creative, the way you write Leo's perspective is AMAZING, love the font changes, the angst PALPABLE, and just over all I love everything you're able to do with this concept. The way you can see Leo's mental state deteriorating through out the fic is just *chefs kiss*. There's so much I love about the fic that I can't possibly list everything.

Also the established difference between teleporting and portaling is so great, it adds to the pure panic that void causes for the boys aside from, y'know, crazy dude capable of beating Big Mama within an inch of her life and STRAIGHT UP OFFING a buch of other yokai. It does wonders for establishing him as a threat even though he technically isn't for the turtles. Plus I'm sure that once they find out who Void really is, it will add a bunch of tension since they'll need to stop Leo from literally SCATTERING HIS ATOMS ACROSS SPACE.

AND THE CHAPTER PREVIEW ISTG I've never gotten so much serotonin from being in this much pain ;0; The gif is perfect to set the mood, I can't wait to see what happens. You're ablility to choose just the right thing to stab so many people directly through the heart is nothing short of super-natural. BUT PLEASE give the boi some happiness, if not for his sake, for mine-

ANYWAYS this is all a VERY long way of saying, I absolutely love this and I had to draw the silly boi being the silly boi. I needed to draw him happy for the health of my heart ;-; (don't worry though, I'm working on some tasty angst right now)

Can't wait to see where everything goes, GOOD LUCK TO CASEY but there only six chapters left so we're getting to the end game now >:D

Please have a wonderful rest of your week :D

THANK U SO MUCH ;w; I’m so so happy that my fight scenes are followable/enjoyable, and tho they are a binch to code I’m so happy you enjoy the funky fonts and formatting ;w; i know reading blocks of text can be intimidating/tiring for readers, so i try to break it up to help with the pacing and sprinkle in some fun, spooky fonts as treats 🩵

Something i really, REALLY loved about Rise was the fights. Not only was the animation amazing, but it was always so creative. I try my best to make the fight scenes as silly as the boys can be, while utilizing their adaptive skills to use their surroundings to their advantage.

And bruh trying to balance Leo’s insanity in a believable way has been such a (fun) challenge so it makes me so happy to hear you like it 😭🥺 and I’m so glad people seem to like the ‘teleportation’ gimmick I’ve got going on (and that it hopefully makes sense omg)

(And i will admit I’m a little proud of my chapter previews because they are so fun to write, and i like to reassure readers that 1) i have a plan and 2) I’m keeping myself accountable to finish LOL)

Also aksdlaskdhaksdh thank u for this art this part especially is SENDING ME WHEEZE 🤣🩵❗️

[oleander-nin]

Hey you~ YES YOU PRETTY PERSON ❤️

I was reading your stuff and see that wasn't nothing about my best baby boy in blue??? Like,wha- he didn't survive the prison dimension for nothing y'know?

Sooo,why not ask about him??

I making a fic with this troupe and i'd love to see another's person writing this so.

Rise Leo x reader....

*Dramatic pause of course*

Enemies to lovers

Yes baby,my favorite type!

The scenario? Well...she is a new villain in New York with some unsolved things with draxum,wanna make him pay for past stuff and all. The turtles find out about it and of course go protect their dad for abvious reasons and when they find the reader,they are more sassy and flamboyant than Leo lol.

Reader is a menance (villain arc goes brrr) but at some point (probably on the kraang invasion) they helped the turtles noticing their feelings for Leo and kinda confess or sum?

Damm. This is kinda of a big request, sorry for that lol

A/N: I adore this concept more than you can possibly know. As soon as this chapter is posted, I will be reading up everything you have on it. It just sounds so fun!(I didn't read it b4 hand cause I didn't want to accidently copy smth. Hope it still fits lol) Kinda took the post Kraang part and ran with it tbh. Also, in my defense, I have like 5 Leo WIPs rn, I just haven't gotten around to finishing them. But this seemed like the best 1st Leo post I could ever make, so it got major priority. And thanks for referring to me as pretty person! It made me so happy and I almost didn't want to answer this 'cause I just liked to re-read this ask a lot. I'm sorry it's so bad, I was really tired and wanted to get something out quick. Any criticism is welcome, constructive or not. This is supposed to be a gender neutral reader, so if I screwed up somewhere, please tell me.

Warnings: Post-Movie, mentions of kraang, Leo being bandaged and wounded, bad writing.

Words: 1325

Summary: It's two weeks after the Kraang invasion, and you haven't seen Leo since.

I stare down at the broken city, disappointed with the destruction the Kraang brought with them. Sure, I wasn’t exactly what could be called a stand-up citizen, but this was my home too. It had been two weeks since the Kraang invasion, two weeks since I had fought alongside the people I had known as enemies, two weeks since I had last seen them alive. After the Kraang ship exploded and the portal closed, I hadn’t seen any of the turtles or their friends. Not that I’m worried of course. They were all resilient, able to survive everything thrown at them thus far. Even if they weren’t okay, I was a villain and they were heroes. Something happening to them would just be a relief to the constant thorn in my side they insist on being. I couldn’t start caring about them, not now. No matter how much I was worried.

I turned around, facing away from the broken city. Repairs had started, but it would take a long time. People were missing, buildings had fallen, and morale had gone down. After all, an alien invasion wasn’t something even New York could instantly bounce back from. We would heal, but it would take months, even years. I start to head back to my home, jumping across the rooftops when I can and using the fire escapes on others. It was calming, the wind brushing against my face as I ran. I avoid the remaining rubble and the broken glass littering the rooftops, not wanting to slice open my legs.

I take a running jump, feeling myself being suspended in the air before gravity takes hold once more. Shifting my weight, I crouch down as I land, trying to lessen the impact on my still bruised legs. I use the momentum from the landing to shoot myself forwards, laughing as I feel the wind against my face. I get ready to make the next jump, my arms swinging backwards to help gain the right momentum, but I falter when I hear a voice in the distance. Leo’s voice. Slowing down, my arms sticking out to the sides as I try to not fall, my head snaps over to where I heard his voice. I knew I shouldn’t care, why did it matter that I heard him? We were enemies, I hated him, and he hated me. Right? I ignore my screaming brain, walking forwards and peering over the edge of the roof.

There they were, the four turtles and their human friends. Gross. I let out a grimace, watching as they waited in the alley, 3 pizza boxes in the orange ones arms. I continue to scan over them out of curiosity, trying to find Leo. His brothers were all there, having minimal damage done to them(Except the red one, but I already figured his shell wasn’t the only thing damaged the last I saw him.) I kept seeing basic glances of Leo, but the red one was blocking my view. I huff in frustration, moving along the edge of the roof to try and see him better. I could hear him just fine, but I wanted to see him.

I jump to a slightly lower building, keeping in the shadows so they don’t notice me. I had no idea why I cared so much, but I felt like I needed to see Leo. I wanted to make sure he was safe too. I duck down farther behind the ledge of the rooftop, the entrance to Run Of The Mill opening as someone stepped out. A very goat-like purple yōkai, stepped out. I groan, grimacing as I look at Baron Draxum. I let out a huff of air, frustrated. I give up on staying behind to check on Leo. I heard his loud voice, so he was probably fine. 

I keep quiet as I climb up a building, leaping across the residential and commercial buildings. If I really wanted to, I could just cause chaos in a few weeks to make sure they all showed up. But right now? Right now I just wanted to sleep. I jump onto a building with a wider roof, looking across the skyline. The broken city still managed to be beautiful, the people on the ground scurrying to be wherever they were needed. I hear a small thud behind me, my ears picking up the familiar pattering of footsteps. I continued to scan the horizon, pretending I was oblivious to the figure behind me. I grip my knife and shift my weight slightly, waiting until the perpetrator was in range. Once I could hear the breath of the person, I turned around, sweeping their legs from under them and holding a knife to their throat.

The attacker lets out a small yelp and a groan as they hit the ground, a shaky smile on their green face as they look up at me. It was Leo. I quickly get off of him, pulling him up with me as I put my knife back into its sheath on my side. I take in his appearance, my mouth pressing into a tight line as I notice his bandages. His carapace was completely wrapped up, as well as most of his platron. Different bandage wraps were scattered all over him, covering most of his scaly skin from sight. 

“What happened to you?” I ask, a small frown on my face. Leo’s smile never drops, pulling me into a tight hug.

“I missed you too! You know, it’s been so boring without you stirring up trouble every other day.” Leo pulls back from the hug, a hand on each of my shoulders as he shakes me lightly, mock disappointment on his features. “You disappeared before my grand finale! You didn’t even get to see how awesome I was! You are one cruel, cruel frenemy, you know that?”

I roll my eyes, batting his hands off my shoulders. “Oh please, I had more important things to do. Like, oh I don’t know, making sure Kraang minions didn’t kill a bunch of people?” I jut my hip out, looking Leo up and down again. “Seriously though, what happened after I left?”

“Aww, does someone care?” Leo teases, a smug grin on his face. My frown deepens, knowing I shouldn’t be upset he was wounded. I shouldn’t care. I should be ecstatic he got hurt, the only thing I should be upset about is that he wasn’t knocked out of commission. We were enemies, they were friends of Draxum.

I turn around, trying to ignore the hole of despair growing in my chest. He was covered in so many bandages, new scars covering his visible skin. I felt sick just looking at him. Would he have been fine if I stayed? If I didn’t rush off? I couldn’t think of it right now, not wanting to come to terms with the fact that I cared for him.

Leo grabs my arm before I can jump to the next roof, pulling me back and putting his hands back on my shoulders, keeping me in place. “Hey, what’s gotten into you? Are you okay?” His voice is soft and his eyes are full of concern. It all just makes me feel worse. “You’re usually spitting back one liners and being all sarcastic, did something happen?”

I look back at Leo, chewing on the inside of my cheek as I try to figure out how to explain what I was feeling. I sigh, pulling Leo in for a hug, being careful not to put too much pressure on any of his wounds. I assumed I did a good job, as Leo just laughed and hugged me tighter against him. “It’d just be really inconvenient if something happened to you. You can’t just leave me with your brothers, they're boring.” 

Leo laughs at that, pulling away from the hug with a dopey grin on his face. “I knew you cared.”

[princess-of-the-corner]

Amnesia!Dabi

Once again, the ask has forsaken me- (Edit:and then this got away from me, holy shit-)

so like, the “half-baked plan to leave”-

Dabi, by this point, has spent - god, I don’t know how old he is - let’s say sixish years? essentially homeless, mostly without memory, and hiding as best he can from the law. And like, yeah, he wants to know who the hell he is, but he’s out of options, and by the time he joins the LoV … I won’t say he’s given up, but he’s getting real damn tired of not knowing things. It’s not like he’s investigated all of Japan, but he’s starting to wonder if that’s even where he’s from. Or even if maybe he should stop looking so hard, find somewhere he can hunker down, maybe see a therapist? Someone who could help him unravel all the blankness in his head, anyway. But, like, it’s not a concrete PLAN, so much as a thought experiment, at this point.

then he joins the LoV, meets Himiko, and goes “oh. huh. maybe this won’t be so bad?” Like, he’s under no illusions that these are the bad guys, but like. He’s remembered more bits and pieces hanging out with Himiko than literally anything else he’s ever tried. I doubt he’d trust the league as a whole with his memory loss, but if he says “yeah, I’m trying to track down someone, it’s sort of important and means a lot to me”, I imagine they’d all be pretty on board? Like, the League are all fairly nice people, really, so it’s going ok. Yeah, there are a few things that make him a bit uncomfortable, and he’s quickly becoming protective of Himiko (and worried, is she supposed to have random fevers?) but Dabi’s thinking maybe they CAN help him figure this out.

But he also isn’t a moron. He knows this kind of group could easily screw him over, so now he’s seriously considering back-up plans. Even if the group DOES screw him over, he’s met a few people now, made some of his own connections. He could pretty easily get papers to get himself out of country if he needs to. He’s also making plans to find a hospital or something to take Himiko to, because she’s starting to seriously worry him. I’m basing this mostly on myself, honestly - I have a pretty severe Iron deficiency - and before we figured out that was the problem, I would have dizzy spells, migraines, nausea with no explanation, my immune system wasn’t great so I’d keep getting sick, etc, So this is what’s happening to Himiko. And like, the rest of the League isn’t indifferent to Himiko clearly being sick, but as far as they know, this might be normal for her. Dabi’s the one really getting worried and starting to look at treatment. But this is still mostly theoretical. He doesn’t have a solid plan.

But then- then we have the Forest Training Camp, and Kidnapping Katsuki. And that’s our first big stumbling block, cause like. Dabi is not okay with hurting kids. Not at all. In any way, shape, or form. He’s taking solace in the fact that this isn’t, like, the goal - they’re just here to recruit, right? Only, wow, so many kids ALMOST DIE, this is NOT OKAY. Honestly, he might have dipped during the fight itself , except then he sees Shouto, and “Surprise!” he’s remembering baby Shouto, “Just one more, T****-n**!”, wait, what, who? What was that??? The whole thing makes him seriously disoriented and it’s all he can do to make it back to the hideout without passing out. Which, ya know, he does the moment he has a flat, safe surface on which to do so.

So he wakes up, all confused - he knows the Peppermint kid? Maybe? - and he’s thinking of a plan, walks out into the main room … and sees Katsuki chained up. And muzzled.

Oh. Hell. No.

Yeah, fuck that, fuck this, Dabi does not want to be a part of whatever bullshit this is. He’s honestly preparing to set the place on fire, when All Might shows up, everything quickly goes to shit, and we probably have some awesome back-to-back dueling going on, as Dabi tries to keep Himiko and Katsuki out of the line of fire.

Now, the moment Katsuki gets rescued, Dabi is grabbing Himiko and bolting. He might cover their retreat, might create some theatrical distraction, but then he is LEAVING. He is NOT sticking around to watch All Might punch the thousand year old man. And he does get away, but now-

Well, I would imagine during the fight, Himiko got hurt. And maybe if she was completely healthy, it wouldn’t matter so much, but Himiko (as we have stated, but I feel the need to reiterate) has spent twelve years being STARVED. So she’s hurt, probably already sick, and not doing too great. Dabi is, at this point, a wanted criminal. He doesn’t have a lot of money, he just betrayed what allies he had, and watched the boss of those guys throw down with the best hero ever born. He has NOTHING to work with.

Except …

He remembers Shouto. He remembers Shouto as a kid, a little kid, a memory that’s clearer than any he has. Shouto goes to U.A., where they have Recovery Girl, and are pretty outspoken about Quirk Discrimination and how they won’t tolerate it. One of their teachers even has a blood based Quirk. Yes, Dabi participated in helping kidnap one of their students, but he also helped that student then escape. If it was just his memory, or just Himiko being sick and hurt, Dabi might not have done it. He might have figured something else out. Laid low, or found an underground hospital.

But together?

Yeah, he’s taking that risk.

-

YEAH ITS

so re: the Timeline if we’re going with the Chaos Children timeline where he ‘died’ at 19 and he’s 23 when 1-A’s first year starts so it’s closer to just the three years depending on how long he was in coma-town(in CC it’s still a bit so he hasn’t been ‘awake’ for /too/ long, enough to get some bearings and to be manipulated, but in this AU we could have the coma being really short which is part of why he escapes.)

But even so the three years is enough for him to start looking into things and being incredibly frustrated.

Actually using the CC timeline might make things worse because it’s harder for him to figure out how old he is as he’s already a grown adult. Like still a young adult obvs he has some maturing to do still, but in terms of physicality he’s pretty indistinguishable and any other features that would be used to guess his age are obscured by the burns.

I think the rest of the League would notice and care about Himiko’s health, but it’s. None of them trust AfO’s doctor because the fucker’s playing frankenstein and taking her to a /real/ doctor would result in her (and whoever is escorting her) getting arrested. Like yeah she can shapeshift and disguise herself doctors /really/ need to know your real self to get a diagnosis and to prescribe meds so she can’t really just walk in as a rando even with fake paperwork.

So they try to help her as best they can with things they can get at a pharmacy(either over the counter meds or stuff they rob from behind the counter when the otc stuff doesn’t work). And Himiko kinda waving them off because she’s ‘always like this’ and ‘just needs to manage herself better’ doesn’t help. Because they don’t know the cause is because of her Quirk and being starved for 12 years, and even though she’s getting a decent supply of blood now (sometimes from them letting her have a bite of them, sometimes through whoever is the target of the day), it’s not enough to really make up for the years of neglect. But again: they don’t entirely know all of these details so when she says she’s used to feeling bad like that, they start to assume some kind of like chronic illness type of thing that yes she genuinely needs a doctor for.

But again that loops back to the above issue of getting her to a doctor without being thrown in jail. Doubly so because they doubt she’d really get proper treatment in jail either. 

I think the thing that keeps Dabi from taking Himiko and jumping ship earlier is mostly just Himiko herself. Because she doesn’t want to risk it and it’s pretty impossible to force her. And even on the days when she does feel awful enough to debate risking trying to go to a doctor, Himiko still hesitates because she’s grown friendly with the other LoV members and this might endanger them but also she’d never be able to see them again.

And then yeah the kidnapping thing happens and it’s. It’s a final push but even then Dabi might’ve hesitated more if Himiko hadn’t been hurt. And while he could patch her up on his own both of them REALLY need an actual doctor. so he takes the risk.

Himiko is probably mad at him for a while. Sure, she understands, so she’s not too mad and she’s not going to stay mad at him forever. But she’s at least gonna cry about it for a while.

[bbangsuns]

don’t break my heart again | r.c

warnings: angst, slight nsfw themes, rafe is just a little ooc but not much, terrible writing, mentions of drug addiction and overdoses, ward cameron. i think that’s it?

a/n: part 2 to this fic. this won’t have a lot of smut, but if you guys want a 3rd part with just smut i’ll write one <3

a/n part 2: i’m not happy with this ending at all i might redo it soon 🧍🏽‍♀️also this isn’t beta’d so sorry if there are any mistakes

word count: 1.4k

after your talk at the chateau with the pogues, you made the decision to head to your brothers house for the first time in a few weeks, wanting to rest as much as possible before you talked to rafe.

you knew it would be difficult to sleep after everything that happened, but you never expected it to be damn near impossible. after tossing and turning in bed for what seemed like years with the big red ‘1:37 A.M.’ taunting you from your alarm, you decided to go for a walk on the beach to hopefully tire yourself out. climbing out of bed and putting on your shoes, you opened your window as carefully as possible, trying to not wake your older brother up and slipped out, extremely grateful for the fact that you lived in a one story house.

the walk to the beach was peaceful, the sounds of nature soothing your nerves almost instantly. arriving to the beach in 10 minutes, your eyes were immediately drawn to the figure sitting near the shore, your body tensing up once again. however as you moved closer, you were almost positive you knew exactly who it was, and your suspicions were confirmed as soon as you got close enough and spoke.

“rafe?” his head whipped around so fast you thought the poor boy would get whiplash. he went to stand but you stopped him with a hand on his shoulder, opting to sit down right next to him. you could feel his eyes on you and turned your head, and even in the low light you could see his bloodshot eyes and swollen lips, assuming he’s been picking and biting at them all day. you went to softly reprimand him for his bad habit, but he beat you to it.

“i’m so sorry, doll. you have no idea how much I regret saying those words to you. i was just so fucking frustrated after my fight with ward and i know you were just trying to help me feel better, and i know that’s no excuse but i wasn’t thinking.” he breathed out, his voice cracking at the last few words. staring at the broken boy in front of you, you couldn’t help but bring your hand up to his cheek, caressing it lightly. rafe’s eyes fluttered shut and his shoulders sagged slightly, leaning into your touch and you took this opportunity to speak.

“what you said really hurt me, rafe. it made me feel so small and belittled. now, i know you weren’t in the right state of mind because of ward and i tried not taking it so personally, but god hearing that from the person you love more than anything is something that shakes your core no matter how badly you wish it didn’t.” you said it with a voice so full of hurt that rafe felt a shiver go down his spine, hating that he was the cause of all the pain you’ve been feeling over the last few months. he went to open his mouth to speak again but you shook your head, signaling you weren’t finished so he closed his mouth, staring at you.

“i know you’ve been going through a lot with ward and the high expectations he has for you, but the way you’ve been coping has been hurting me and our relationship. every time you have a fight with ward and storm out of the house, i stay awake wondering when or if you’ll come home. and if you don’t come home, i imagine the worst scenario, asking myself if you got into an accident because you drove home high, or if you took it too far this time with the cocaine and you overdosed somewhere i wouldn’t be able to find you. it terrifies me beyond words, rafe, and i don’t know how much more i can take before it’s all too much.” by the end of your confession you were crying again, the tears spilling out of your eyes and your breathing becoming erratic. you removed your hand from rafe’s cheek, pressing your palms into your eyes harshly, attempting to keep the tears from falling anymore.

rafe didn’t know what to say, his heart breaking all over again at the sight of you crumbling in front of him. he felt his hands shaking, his own tears slipping out at the fact that he’d been neglecting you and making you sick with worry for so long. he truthfully hated himself for it, but he felt the desperation in him, the need to try and fix your relationship any way he could. wiping his face, he grabbed your hands and pulled them away from your eyes, using one hand to hold both of yours, his other one was now on your cheek, turning your face towards him. his thumb stroked the skin, wiping away the tears that continued falling.

“i’m sorry for never noticing how much you were hurting. i’m sorry for pushing you away when all you wanted to do was help me. i know i haven’t shown it for a while, but you’re truly the best thing that has ever happened to me and i’ll do anything to show you that. whatever you want, i’ll do it because i can’t stand to ever lose you.”

the way he spoke to you, the slight panic in his voice and watery eyes, you knew he was being genuine. but, there was a part of you that was still skeptical, scared that he wouldn’t be able to keep his word and he’d slip back into his addiction, and you don’t think you’d be able to handle that cycle again. rafe noticed your hesitation, his stomach sinking at the idea that you wouldn’t want to stay with him after what he’s put you through. as he went to say something else, you interrupted him.

“i want you to stop using drugs, rafe. if you can’t do it on your own, you can go to a rehab facility on the mainland and i’ll go with you, maybe find an apartment there or something. but i need you to do it, love. if not for me, do it for yourself. i wouldn’t be able to handle something happening to you all because of that shit you’re putting in your body.” you spoke with a certain determination, almost demanding that he stop chasing a high, and rafe wasn’t dumb. he knew that if he didn’t get his shit together, you wouldn’t stick around to watch him slowly kill himself, for fear it would kill you inside too. so, he agreed to quitting, not willing to risk seeing you walk away.

“i’ll do it. i’ll do whatever it takes to fix things between us, i just don’t wanna lose you.”

you looked at him, a small smile on your face knowing he would never truly lose you. you kept that thought to yourself as you leaned in, placing your lips on his to which he kissed back immediately, moving his hand to the back of your neck to keep you close. you broke the kiss only to seat yourself on his lap, and you connected your lips as soon as you sat down, wrapping your arms around his neck. biting your bottom lip, rafe took advantage of the small moan that left you and slid his tongue inside your mouth, taking control of the kiss. sliding your hands under his shirt, you tugged at it, wanting to remove it as fast as possible. he pulled away from your lips, quickly removing his shirt and attached his lips to your neck, nipping at the skin as he left a trail of wet kisses all the way to your collarbone. rafe moved you off his lap, laying you on the sand and hovering over you, one hand slipping under your shirt, his thumb and index finger grabbing your nipple and rolling it between them, causing a low whine to leave your lips.

“rafe, don’t mess with me. just make me feel good.” it came out as more of a whine, a small pout on your lips. after going so long with him not touching you, you just wanted to feel all of him, sand be damned; you’d deal with that annoying detail later. rafe just laughed at you softly, leaning back on his feet to look down at you.

“whatever you want, baby”

that night you didn’t leave the beach until almost dawn, not wanting to risk anyone seeing anything, but you both left feeling the happiest you’d ever been in a long time. pure ecstasy was flowing through your body knowing that you and rafe were going to be okay and that your relationship was going to be stronger than ever.

[tilvcei]

hi angel. i absolutely love your writing and i was wondering if you could write something fitting this trope with ethan landry and black!fem reader. maybe them getting in a fight bc ethan is drunk and her just being tired of the shit bc he does this every time. i think you have the skill to write this with the emotional depth it needs based on what i’ve seen. love you ! x

feel free to ignore this if you’re not accepting requests! i couldn’t find an faq or anything before i sent this so i’m sorry just in case <3

► 𝐁𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐏𝐎𝐈𝐍𝐓

⭢ In which: you haven’t been on the best path and try to hold everything in at once, but one person you care deeply for starts to notice. so, you just let the tears fall.

☆ | warning(s): angst, language, abusive household, alcohol,

☆ | note: request are open, actually! also thank you for the request because my inbox is empty 😭 also yes i made this very sad and I’m being truthful I cried myself while writing this, let me know if you want me to change it! thanks for requesting sweetheart <3 I can also relate to this one, I put some things that have happened to me in this writing— but other than that lemme stop rambling, enjoy :) [im not in college lol, that’s just an insert so the story makes sense] THIS IS SHORT, IM SORRY

☆ | gender: she/her (black!reader)

tagging 🏷: @ncllcraines

Today was rather a normal day. no killings or anything- well, not yet at least. you’ve been dealing with a lot. school, home, basically everything all together.

Not just that, you’ve been falling behind on college too. one of the teachers suggested you may need a tutor, which you lied and said you didn’t but they gave you one anyways.

And that tutor was Ethan thankfully. having to take care of your siblings was the only thing on your mind at the time. your mom is barely home cause of work. so being the big sister that you are you decided to step in and help.

you had stayed up overnight, working on everything without taking a break. this was a real struggle, your mom and step-dad were alcoholics at once, but then stopped when they realized what damages were happening since your step-dad had a mini stroke.

But other than that everything has been good, but for you? therapy was suggested from your mom.

on some days you were happy, some days sad. randomly out of nowhere you started feeling depressed.

Sleeping habits started changing, you started going asleep around 1:00/3:00 at night and when you’d wake up you’d still feel tired.

Working late shifts, just all of that was bothering you. and you were behind on exams, right now ethan was in your dorm, helping you with your work.

"So, do you know how many bones were fractured? it shows it on…let’s see, page 27. if we go back, we can find the answer on page 20." Ethan said, you sat there sulking.

You really didn’t understand the point of this, "do we have to do this? I understand this is important for my future but-" you were cut off by ethan.

"(Y/n). if you don’t want to finish this oh well, I’m going to help you. you’re going to be successful." Ethan said, you groaned in annoyance and looked back down at the sheet.

A sigh came from his lips, the only thing he wanted was the best for you. he could see how much you were struggling, he could see what you were trying to do.

"Are you sure everything is okay? you’ve been distant lately." Ethan said, when he asked that question you stiffened.

Why was he bringing that up now? nothing was wrong you were just extremely frustrated at the moment.

"I-I’m sorry. did I say something wrong?" asked ethan, you rubbed a tired hand over your face. the stress was evident on your face.

"I think I’m at my breaking point. you know how you just get tired of having to hold everything down all at once? if I’m being honest: I can’t- I…" you trailed off, as much as you were trying to hold your composure.

Then the tears started to fall, ethan wasn’t really shocked though, he knew what you were going through but waited for you to open up about it.

"You’re crying." Ethan said with a frown, he was startled when you wrapped him in a hug, "I’m just tired, ethan. of everything." you told him while sobbing.

"I know, I know. but it’s okay sweetheart, we could just put this to the side and lay down for a bit? if you want." Ethan suggested.

"Actually, that’s a great idea. I need a break anyways." You agreed, Ethan nodded and placed some of the books and sheets on the table.

Arms found themselves wrapping around your waist, maybe this was what you needed, some type of comfort. after all you’ve been dealing with a lot lately.

"Thank you, ethan. for being here." you said, he didn’t reply and instead placed a kiss on your cheek, "Anytime, love."

He was your safe place.

Im so sorry this was short, it was horrible also ik 😭 and this also felt rushed. I might fix some things up here, also if anyone would like to send request go ahead!! my inbox is open :D

[charmac]

helllooooo i am absolutely obsessed with your macden sugar daddy fic. i’m not kidding when i say it has become a household name for me (in the dms with my poor, dear friend who does not even watch sunny. i have, and will continue to, bombard her with messages such as: “the macdennis fic i’ve been creaming over hasn’t been updated i’m in shambles” and thankfully you did update after that).

i went through your tumblr for a bit and saw in one of your responses you mentioned feeling a lack of encouragement to write when it feels like no one is actively requesting so i suppose this is my formal request. i am quite literally so emotionally invested in this fic. this is my high class literature (as a lit major). this is my magnum opus and i’m talking about the experience of READING it, not trying to imply this work is in any way mine.

i have sooo much i’d like to say about it but i get so scatterbrained when i think about it. i read the entire thing in one sitting and was in agony when i finished. then you updated on christmas and i read the entire thing AGAIN and i keep going back to that most recent chapter where (spoilers ig!) mac calls dennis daddy because it simply /felt right/. because he felt /safe/? oh i’m on the floor and begging for mercy. you’re brilliant. this story is brilliant. i’m a mess.

if you ever feel like people might not be interested: listen to me when i say your writing has permanently altered the chemistry of my dna and has conditioned me to check ao3 every single day with bated breath HOPING there’s an update. i love it. that’s an understatement. i LOVE IT.

i would also like to clarify that if you ever run into issues with writer’s block or even simply losing the excitement over this specific story, pls don’t feel obligated to write something you don’t want to. it’s your life!! i saw your 2023 update post and it seems like a fucking fantastic one at that, so live it to the fullest and do what you want!!

i think you’re neat. i think your writing is what leads good men to ruin (like me. i’m supposed to be reading jane eyre rn and all i can think of is your fic) /pos. truly my favorite source of sunny content across all your sunny social media.

question that i do apologize for asking if you’ve answered: the title is a fall out boy reference, right? big fan of that band. if it is, can i ask for details on the inspo?

thank u for your service solider o7

p.s. this was so needlessly long so sorry for bothering lmfaoooo but i had to say this somewhere and i think my friend is tired of hearing about the fanfic on a ship for a show she doesn’t even watch

First off, thank you so much for this, and second off don’t apologise for writing too much to me after you’ve seen the word count I spew out at random. I really appreciate your words, and I’ll tell you I’ve been in so many similar positions where I’ve been obsessed with a fic and had no one in it to relate to and have just ended up spamming a close friend instead, so to hear that’s done about my fic is really, really cool.

About prior asks, etc. I think I get down on myself a little, when I say I don’t get why people are reading or what they like and it’s hard to find motivation, it’s really just kinda my own internal struggle with all of that. (Also, I keep answering those when I'm drunk, my bad.) I get what I’m doing and what I’m writing, but I wanna make sure the audience does too. But you’re reading my words, so you must, even if you can’t (or just, don’t want to) sit down and go line-by-line of a 23k word chapter and tell me what’s going on.

Cause, I couldn’t sit down and write a full detailed list of every new episode of Sunny like that. Like, I just straight up couldn’t when they dropped. My reviews were like ‘5 stars, keysmash’ So I think there is something to be said about people really liking something, really wanting more, but maybe not having the words to vocalise or not having the time to vocalise why that is.

About wait times, updates, etc.. It is mainly about motivation, and like you’ve said I would never put out something just to put it out if it’s not reflective of what I want it to be (and know it can be). I mean, I’m not on a real deadline and I’m not getting paid, I'm writing this first and foremost for myself, so why would I rush it? Sometimes I can write thousands of words in a day, if the spark hits, but sometimes it can take months to fully form when it’s just me in my head and I still have to do shit in my daily life. And maybe I could do something to speed up that process, but I think my best work forms this way. But it does make updates painfully slow for you guys, and I apologise, cos I get that sucks.

Though, it is also spurred by external motivation: people pointing specific things out, telling me why they like something or what they see under the surface here, that stuff actually gets the gears in my head turning, back in focus. The ‘waiting for an update’ ‘pls write more’ isn’t motivation, it’s demand. (And understanding there is demand is definitely a motivator, don’t get me wrong, but that’s not a spark, it’s a push.) So the balance there is sometimes hard to match, I understand there is demand (though after Ch 7 or 8 whatever it was I genuinely thought maybe there wasn’t), and I appreciate being told that, but it can only go insofar as I have the motivation to bounce off of it. Sometimes, that’s literally just my own issue and no one can help me. You (not you, specifically, anon) just gotta trust an update will come... and if you fall out of care for Sunny in the meantime, oh well. Know I won't, lmfao.

About the Title, well, no one actually has asked me... I don't think (maybe 'cause it seems obvious?). I guess the answer is.. kind of? It is a lyric pulled from the Fall Out Boy song, but, well, a meme says it best:

The inspo is kinda what's written on the tin, wanted a title that makes it clear what it is. Don't read too much into the baseball metaphor though, it might hurt you a little in the spoilers department, if you think we're just purely having fun here...

Thanks for the ask, really really appreciate it, and knowing people like you are reading and enjoying my fic is awesome :)

[praxeus-13]

Chronic

Pairing: Dh!Master x ChronicallyIll!Reader

Word Count: 1180

Summary: The Master cares for you during a flare up

Warnings: kinda self-deprecating language/thoughts? Not the most positive view on chronic illness I guess? Also swearing

A/N: This one is very self indulgent because I recently got diagnosed with Fibromyalgia after suffering for 2 years, and I need this fic to cope :/

You sighed, sitting at the edge of the TARDIS porch, staring out into the universe. The stars, the colours, no matter how bad you felt they could always make you smile. This time, however, you were struggling to find even a small smile. Behind you you heard footsteps, causing you emotional pain alongside the physical.

The Master sat down beside you, and you couldn’t bring yourself to look at him, to face him. You’d let him down today, you knew that. You had started off the day with more pain and fatigue than usual, but you had pushed yourself for him, only to be the cause of his plan failing.

“I’m sorry.” You whispered, worried and tired, trying to stop your tears from falling.

“What for?” He sounded confused, and you could tell he was looking at you.

“For fucking up your plan, everything would have been fine if I’d just stayed on the TARDIS.” You sniffled and wiped your eye, still trying to keep the tears in, though the pain was making it difficult.

“I couldn’t care less about the plan, there are literally millions of other planets that I could take over whenever I want. What I do care about is you.”

Finally you faced him, confused about his statement. Your vision was blurred slightly by the unshed tears and you were finding it hard to focus, though you could see the concerned look on his face.

“What?”

“Y/N, you collapsed, I had to help you back here. I-“ He sounded close to tears himself as he took a breath, “I could feel your pain when I was carrying you. You should have said something, nothing is more important to me than you and your health.” He was giving you such an intense look with his big brown eyes, it felt as though he was staring directly into your soul.

“I just wanted to help, I didn’t mean to worry you.” You told him, your voice quiet and timid.

“I appreciate that Y/N, but I want you to look after yourself as well. If you’re not up to an adventure then tell me, please. I’d prefer to have 1000 movie nights on the TARDIS with you comfortable, rather than you pushing yourself and causing more pain and fatigue.” He was so sincere in the way he spoke, even though he was an expert liar you knew he was telling you the truth.

A few more tears fell, you lifted your hand to wipe them away, though The Master got to them quicker. His touch was always so gentle, he made sure not to apply too much pressure so he didn’t hurt you.

“Sorry, sorry.” You tried to apologise, unsure as to why but feeling as though you should.

“Love, there’s no need to apologise.”

“Yeah, sorry,” The Master raised his eyebrow, causing you to smile. “It’s just- I’ve never had anyone care about me the way you do. Most people expect me to just keep pushing myself through everything, to function as they do because I look fine most of the time.”

The Master’s face turned sour, “Well you don’t have to do that with me, I’m perfectly happy to do things at your pace.”

“Thank you.” You told him, deeply sincere.

For a few moments the two of you just gazed into each other’s eyes. It was enchanting, intense in a way that you’d never find suffocating, though you still forced yourself to look away before you did anything stupid. The Master coughed, looking away as well.

“Mmm, you should probably get some rest.” He commented, standing up himself.

In that moment the pain and fatigue that had almost turned into background noise throughout the conversation came back full force. You glanced behind you at the entrance to the console room, then to the corridors beyond. Your legs were certainly better than they had been earlier, but you knew they’d still be shaky and painful to walk on, and you couldn’t trust that you’d be able to get back to your room without collapsing again. On the other hand, your body was practically screaming at you with pain, and you knew you needed to rest as soon as possible.

Slowly, carefully, you lifted yourself up while gripping one of the wooden posts for help. Unfortunately, everything seemed to get ten times worse once you were standing, your legs shaking as you’d predicted. Everything hurt, and you wished it didn’t. As you looked down at your legs you remembered the days where you could walk or even run without aching, more tears welling in your eyes as you grieved for a few moments.

“Do you want some help?” The Master queried, snapping you out of your thoughts.

You glanced at him, opened your mouth to speak, though no reply came. Instead you looked at the open door again. It was only two meters away, if that, you could make it (hopefully). You took a deep breath and took a step forward. Unfortunately your legs went out from underneath you and you felt yourself plummet towards the floor. You desperately grasped backwards for the pole, but your limbs were tired and uncoordinated causing you to miss.

However, you didn’t hit the floor, The Master catching you instead and cradling you into his arms. Your heart was beating fast, the awful mix of fear and pain causing you to feel nauseous. The two of you took a moment to just breath and calm down, and you couldn’t help but lean into The Master’s hold.

“Is it alright if I carry you?” He asked quietly, murmuring the question into your ear.

You nodded in response, suppressing the shiver his action caused. To your surprise he shifted you so that he could pick you up bridal style, you weren’t quite sure what you’d been expecting when he asked, but it wasn’t anything as intimate as this.

As he started to walk to your room the fatigue really started to set in, not helped by the fact that you felt extremely safe in The Master’s arms. The walk seemed to be taking longer than usual, as though his TARDIS had moved your room further away, though that didn’t make any sense to you given the state you were in.

Soon enough your eyes were closing, and you were struggling to stay awake. The Master seemed to notice as he smiled softly down at you, placing a kiss on your forehead. Though he didn’t say anything you understood his message, allowing yourself to fall asleep knowing that he would take care of you.

Tomorrow you would wake up in a lot of pain, and you’d suffer through your flare up. It’d happened before and it would happen again, and in between flare ups you would still wake up everyday with some part of your body aching - just as you had for the past few years. However bleak that sounded, there was now a glimmer of hope within you. Maybe the future wouldn’t be so bad if you had The Master by your side.

[spidey-x-male-reader]

Simon 'Ghost' Riley x male!reader

Requested: yes / no

Word count: 1.2k

Warnings: light swearing, written at 1am, reader being really awkward (I'm tired. Cut me some slack), also proofread around 1am so I'm not even sure if that counts??

Summary: After everything that Ghost has been trough it's finally time for him to step back and enjoy a quiet life. His life seems to be getting interisting again however when he meets the man that lives across the hallway.

Masterlist

A normal, mundane life was unusual for ghost. And it was hard for him to finally get used to all of it again even if his life has never been really normal. And after all this time in the military, he had routines that he couldn’t quite get rid of.

However, in the last weeks he has been living in his new apartment already, a new routine seemed to form when he started to hear cursing out of the hallway almost every single evening until he finally gave in and decides to see what causes the sounds.

Opening the door, he wasn't sure what he would find, he definitely didn't expect a guy to kneel in front of the door on the opposite of him, cursing to himself, hammering against it a few times, which did not seem to make him any happier.

You were now sitting in front of your door for ten minutes, trying to open that stupid thing, when you heard a sound behind you. You slowly turn around to face a really tall guy, wearing a balaclava with a skull on it…alright…not the weirdest thing you’ve seen in this apartment before.  

You just look at the guy for a few seconds, not sure how one reacts in such a situation. "…Okay I know this looks really weird, but I promise I'm not breaking in right now. This is my apartment”

You don’t move for a few seconds before quickly getting up to your feet, realizing that it was getting difficult to stare up at him the whole time. “You’re the new neighbour who moved in some weeks ago, right? I think Stacy from downstairs mentioned someone moving in. I would have properly introduced myself before, but I was kind of busy”

“I really don’t have a problem with not getting a big welcome around here”, okay. So, he was keeping the information you got from him short. You could live with that.

“Yeah…you do seem more like the brooding type. Not that there’s any problem with that, of course”, you chuckle quietly to yourself, asking yourself how you could try to not make all of this even more awkward. Maybe this was just a talent that you had. “So…what are you doing here?”, you slowly ask him.

“I was seeing what was causing this noise in the hallway…that I’m hearing frequently by the way”

“Oh…Oh I’m so sorry. This is just…really frustrating. You can’t even imagine.”, you flush, looking a little embarrassed, stopping yourself from ranting and instead trying to explain the problem you had. “The lock is really shitty. It always takes me an eternity to open it. The landlord says that there’s some trick to it, but it doesn’t work for me, so I assume he just doesn’t want to swap out the locks”, you explain, even though he didn’t really ask.

Ghost looks past you, at the door, you have treated like it was your worst enemy just a few minutes ago. “Do you mind if I…try?”, he slowly offered. He didn’t want to get back to his apartment with the knowledge that there was some guy just sitting in the middle of the hallway, not getting into his own home.

“Oh…yeah sure, man. Knock yourself out”, you hand your keys over to a guy you’ve never seen before in your entire life who, for some reason, is wearing a balaclava when coming out of his apartment. But hey who were you to judge him. It did look cool.

He walked over to the door, trying to open it. Your hopes weren’t really high but only after a few seconds you hear a quiet ‘click’ and watch how your door swings open.

“What the…”, you watch him, your mouth hanging open. “How did you do that?”, that guy was a sorcerer or something.

He just shrugged as answer. “I just opened it”

“You just…”, you stare at him for a few seconds. “That’s about the most impressive thing anyone has ever done for me”

He just looks at you, before slowly handing the keys back. “Try not to lock yourself out again”, well you weren’t really locking yourself out, but you were too thankful to thank about formalities now.

“Will do my best…hey what’s your name?”, you don’t let him retreat into his apartment yet, way too fascinated by the other man to already let him leave.

You were probably annoying him. At least he seemed like it. On the other side…you couldn’t really see much of his face expression. So maybe that was just something you were telling yourself.

He stands there for a few seconds and for a moment you’re sure he’s just gonna go back into his apartment without saying another word. But he answers. “Ghost”

“Ghost?”, you want to laugh at first but then realize that the guy is dead serious. “Oh. Ghost. Alright. It’s a cool name. Suits you with the whole…”, you vaguely gesture into the direction of his face. “…skull theme. I like it”, there are a few more seconds of awkward silence, mainly caused by you because somehow, he’s cool while not saying anything. “My name’s (y/n). Just…in case you were asking yourself.”, he probably wasn’t,

He just nods slightly, slowly walking back into his apartment.

“It was…nice finally meeting you, Ghost”, you quickly say while watching him. “You know maybe we could do some…neighboury stuff at some point. Only if you’d like to of course. You know, what? Just ignore me. I’m just…gonna go inside.”, with that you quickly retreat back into your own four walls, shutting the door behind you, leaning against it.

How. How could a person be this awkward while talking to a handsome guy??

Well…you didn’t know if he was handsome. But you were sure. There was something about his…everything that had already enchanted you. Well shit. Now you sounded like a lovesick teenager already.

That guy didn’t seem really interested tough. Well maybe he was just one of the silent brooding ones.

You quickly shook your head, trying to get those thoughts out of your head. You didn’t even know that guy. Could be a serial killer for all you knew……that would explain the mask actually.

You sigh, deciding to try to get your mind off the handsome neighbour, walking into your living room, letting yourself fall onto your couch only for something to land on your chest a few seconds later.

“Heyy. Missed you too”, you lightly pet your cat, who seems to be happy that you’re finally back and she has someone to pet her. “I met our neighbour today. You would like him.”, you just mumbled, now even talking to your cat, like a lunatic. Oh god you were becoming a cat person. Apparently, this was your destiny now.

You sigh to yourself, closing your eyes, slowly starting to doze off, thinking about the skull mask and the pretty eyes behind it.

[howdy-folks-its-showtime]

April Update!

Howdy! Cobalt here, as many of your guys know It’s Showtime and its characters/story are gonna be turned into a horror game by the same title. So for both Gamejolt and this blog I am gonna start trying to do monthly updates on development. I think it’ll be a good way to put into perspective how much progress is being made each month and keep you guys in the know about how things are going. These are gonna be formatted with work made that month going first and then afterwards any other small announcements or thoughts we’d like to share on development. That or things that weren’t created that month that I basically keep stored in case we have months where progress is slow or I can’t show much behind the scenes stuff. These logs will likely contain personal stuff too, since with me and my partner being the main heads of the project. Our well-being or IRL goals are relevant to how much work is being done. Also while developing Showtime I intend to create other games similar to it, to sort of learn and test the waters + Since those ones aren’t tied to an IP I can actually make money off of them. Something I can’t [or at least not without Mike n Meatly’s permission I suppose] with Showtime or its characters.

April was sadly, not my month, I found out I was vitamin D deficient and got a slight fever. So I spent a lot of days tired and recovering from that. Progress has still been made though, mostly on learning 3D modeling more, I’m almost done with a model I’m making for someone else actually and while it is not perfect by any means… I think it looks really awesome for being my maybe fourth or third model and it’ll be my first truly finished model as well. I also have made good progress on writing both dialogue and summaries of Showtime’s story. I did particularly get ideas for a good chunk of Showy's campaign however, which involves a character I was on the fence about including in Encore!... Until very recently... Art wise not too much has been done specifically this month besides some concept art for cycle designs and some progress on textures for the studio. But that’s okay cause we’re not really at a spot where major progress can be made art wise yet. There’s so much more I want to share but I’ll be doing my best to space out those things out between updates. So no update is too long or too short with nothing interesting in there. Also sorry this is all so vague and non-specific I’m gonna try and get in the habit of actually documenting what work is being done on Showtime monthly from now on, so I’ll be able to be more specific about what parts are being chipped away at.

So onto something that didn’t happen this month but is important we have decided to switch to Unity instead of Unreal Engine 4. I’d like to take some time to explain why and also make sure nobodies too anxious over the change. For one thing, not a lot of progress was made on Unreal Engine, you could hear footsteps as you walked, use a buggy animation to enter a miracle station and the map was just a room full of lights. This is due to the fact while working in Unreal Engine was interesting and I learned quite a bit, I found myself often feeling it was not a good fit for Showtime and that trying to make it so was fighting against the engine as opposed to working with it. Unreal Engine seems to be built for realistic, open world or multiplayer FPS type games. That’s not to say you can’t make anything else with it, but finding tutorials for things I wanted to do was. Basically a nightmare because youtube was flooded with videos on how to make those games specifically. Another big aspect however was the general style. Unreal Engine is great if you want very realistic lighting and have a computer that can tank the sort of weight of that too. Neither is true for me however, Showtime’s characters are all very stylized, our humans are cartoony have clear shapes and most of all, I just want Showtime’s overall style to pay loving homage to 1930’s and general 2D Animation. I think both are really underappreciated and god do I love them. Also I’m making this on literally a laptop, a new one and not a janky one by any means, but still not a desktop. Unreal Engine works great for those who know how to use it and want to create the games it was optimized for, but it’s not ideal for my purposes, Godot seems promising but Unity is just great at specifically doing what I want to do with Showtime. It’s great for beginners to Game Development, has plenty of tutorials for all kinds of games and is very flexible in style. Sadly nothing is better at being Unity than Unity right now. I’m still mad about what the CEO did, and I’m glad for those who were able to switch engines to those with better management but it’s not really an option for us currently. Of course, this will put things back a bit but I’ve already been learning how to build a basic map in Unity and so far have only run into a few issues. Still I would love any advice on how to do this, esp from those who had made games similar to BATIM and other mascot horrors. [I have been thinking of building the maps inside Blender first and then importing them into Unity, to see if that’s easier or practical, but mostly I would love to hear what others commonly do to build such intricate interior design in Unity.] Either way while this month wasn’t terribly exciting by no means was no work done, just nothing too fun to show off yet.

[my-only-way-tocooperatewithlife]

One more drink V - Pierre Gasly series

Hii, thanks for all the likes 🧡 it means a lot 🥹

If something is written like this then it means that the conversation is on Hungarian.

Pairing: Pierre Gasly x fem!reader

warning: swearing, language, mention of depression, alcohol usage

¤ Materlist ¤

-- Previous part -- -- Next part --

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Week have passed and I found myself trying to close up my suitcase that I definitely overpacked. I was bouncing on the top of them trying to close it up.

“Honey, you really have a problem” My friend Viki was laughing on the other side of the line. We were having a video chat on my laptop so we could discuss what should we pack for the trip.

“I told you, I need everything. We have to be prepared for everything.” I answered while sitting on the top of the suitcase trying to pull the zipper on it.

“Yes, that’s true but it’s August, and we are going to Greece, it will be boiling there why do you need that big jacket? “My other friend, Roxy laughed watching me struggling with the zipper.

And it finally moved and I could close it up. “Done! Gosh I’m so tired!” I let out a big breath, leaning back on my luggage. As I was laying on the top of the bag I heard my phone pinging. I sat up started to look for it and I found it under the big pile of clothes that I have not packed in. I saw the notification on my phone that I have got a new message.

“Oh is it that mysterious guy?” Viki was leaning closer to the camera wiggling her eyebrows.

“Are you guys still taking? Weren’t you saying that he left after that day?” Roxy asked while studying my face. I have had a stupid grin plastered on my face.

“Hope you have packed everything, have a nice flight. Soon you will see this beautiful view too.” The text said, and there was a picture attached to it also. It was a beautiful sunset, his back was facing the camera.

Since the Grand Prix in here, we were texting back and forth. First I thought he ghosted me because he disappeared for a few days, but after three days I got a call from him saying that he lost his phone, and he could not find my number in it, so he tried to reach me on Instagram but I was not answering. Which was true but it was because since the Sunday of the Hungaroring most of the drivers started to follow me there, which caused a huge following avalanche from the fans of the F1 so I muted the notification on my phone, and I was not checking it for days. Since then we were talking everyday, sometimes he even called me for a few minutes before he went out with his friends.

“Come on, you need to show us something. We need to see what does he looks like, so if he looks like he has red flags, we can talk some sense in you.” Viki stated.

“What about you guys don’t try to spy on a guy for once in your life?” I rolled my eyes at them and getting up from my suitcase.

“You are really no fun.” Viki pouted on the other side of the computer

“Anyway, stop thinking and talking about the guys in my life and gather your things. I will see you guys in an hour at the airport!” I started to close down the top of my laptop.

“Okay mum, see you there!” They shouted back at me laughing as I was just shaking my head. What have I put myself into?

When we arrived at the beautiful Greek island of Mykonos we were exhausted, so we just packed everything out from our luggage in the apartment, had a small dinner and we went straight to the bed.

“Come one ladies, we are having my bachelorette trip, you can’t just sleep the whole day!” As Roxy was busting through my door while screaming from the top of her lungs. I groaned and turned to the other side while pulling the covers on my head. I needed a few more hours of sleep.

“Roxy, it’s 8 in the morning. You can’t be serious that you are up with all of that energy!” I was mumbling under the covers while trying to force myself back to sleep. I'm really not a morning person, and usually until I don't have my cup of coffee, it's better not to talk to me. I would not tear your head off, I would just simply won't answer.

“Gina, get out of the bed. I tried it, it’s not working she will keep shouting till you get out. She even started to jump on my head and shaking me out of the bed.” Viki stated while she was walking in the room rubbing her eyes.

“I have already got breakfast for us, so all you have to do get your pretty butt out of that bed. Put on your bikini and come down to the kitchen. So we can eat and head down to the beach. I need to tan, I can’t be white as a bag of flour on my wedding!” She was pulling the covers off me and stormed out of the room. With a big sigh, I rubbed my eyes and got out of the bed

------------

We spent the whole day down at the white sandy beach, swimming in the crystal clear blue water, sunbathing and of course drinking cocktails.

As the night has come, Roxy decided that she wants to start her real first night in the island with checking out that beach party clubs. Because since we choose the destination of our trip, she would not shut up about how much she wanted to go some of those clubs. Even though I have had a huge hatred for clubs, I still agreed on it because this trip was really about Roxy and her wishes. This is the last trip when she is not married, we need to enjoy every little moment in it. And I can survive one night, I hope the music will be good, we can have some drinks, dance a little. It does not sound horrible right? We got ready, putting on some flowy dresses because even it was after 7 o’clock at night it was still warm and humid. We headed down one of those beach clubs which was close to our apartment.

Okay I have to admit, this type of club is nothing like the ones we have at home. It was much bigger with open spaces so you won't feel like that it was fully packed. They have had many bars around so you only had to wait for a little bit till you got served. Nice music was playing in the back ground as we were sitting and talking at one of the tables.

“I’m gonna get another round for us.” I got up from my seat walking to the bar.

“Bring some shots too!” Roxy shouted at me, she was already drunk. She was giggling at herself, laughing really loud. And she was way more clumsy as she would be sober. “Gina bring some tequila!” She squealed loudly while bouncing up and down in her seat. I laughed and gave her a thumbs up and turned around to face the bartender. I was about to open my mouth when I heard my name behind me.

“Gina? No way!” I would recognise that French accent everywhere, even if was woken up from my sleep. I totally froze down and I turned back slowly. When I saw those beautiful blue eyes, I felt my heart picking up it's pace.

“Hey there.” I smiled at him while leaning back at the counter behind me.

“What are you doing here?” He looked at me with a total surprised look on his face, which quickly turned into a huge smile. He had a creamed coloured linen button up shirt on, where top three buttons were left open so you could see his hairy beautifully tanned chest and his golden cross necklace. While having a white loose linen trouser on. He looked really hot, especially with that opened shirt. I was choking on my own saliva and I tried to get a sentence out of me. I was obviously staring him for a hot minute, but I wasn't the only one with that. He looked up and down on me, and started to grinning when his eyes came back to my face after slowly looking over me, lingering some parts on my body then the other. I have chosen for a night an emerald green dress with spagetthi straps. It hugged all my curves the right way, hiding some part that I was insicure about but highlighting the one that I was confident about. It ended at my mid thighs but on one side it had a slit which left my tanned upper thighs visible. I definitely choose my only dress that had a deep cut on the front, leaving me with a big cleavage.

“We have the girls trip now. We have our bachelorette party, we rented out a house in here. “ I pointed back at the table where my friends were sitting. And he looked through my shoulder checking on my friends behind me.

“Who would have thought that we will be at the same island at the same time, right?” He let out a deep chuckle. “What are you ladies having?” He was studying my face as I was looking deeply in his beautiful blue eyes.

“Where is my tequila?” Roxy shouted at my way and Pierre started to laugh.

“I can understand why they are your friends. Let me buy you guys a drink. And yes, I know you can buy your own. “He put his hands up in defence. “But it’s your bachelorette party slash girls trip. And it’s my holiday also, so it would be a missed opportunity not the cheer with three beautiful ladies.” He was trying to convince me. I nodded my head agreeing with him.

“Sure, I’m getting way more tipsy to argue with you about it. And I also know that if I'm not getting her a tequila she will throw a tantrum.” I smiled and ask the bartender for four shots of tequila. “Where are your friends?” I was searching on the dance floor trying to catch his friends with my eyes.

“They are somewhere on the dance floor I was just actually trying to get a drink, I got thirsty.” He explained as he grabbed two of the shot glasses and walking back to the table of my friends. I grabbed the other two and I followed him.

“Finally what took you so long? I'm so parched!" Roxy was fanning herself with a napkin dramatically while she was leaning back in the chair. "Oh,you brought a hot one with you, I did not order that one, but I'm really happy for free gifts." She was fluttering her eyelashes at Pierre, who was just laughing. I buried my face in my hands as I was shaking it.

"Thank you ladies, to be honest I'm not comming as a free gift for everyone who orders a shot of tequila." He winked at them with a michevious smile on his lips. The two girls totally lost it, they were acting like blushing 14 years old little girls.

"Okay so if you are not comming with shots, it means you are not working in here. Oh, Gina can we take him home? Look at this greek sculpture body of his! It would definetly look perfectly standing in the living room!" Viki laughed while she was crying at the comment of Roxy.

"Roxy, shut up!" I looked at her trying to force her not to talk anymore. I was already feeling like I want the ground to swallow me. I was a blushing mess, and I did not dare to look up at Pierre, who was totally enjoying the situation. My forehead was sinking into my he"I'm sorry, she is wasted." I looked back at him with an apologetic look, but he just sook his head with a grin.

"What would you ladies say, if we are going to drink this one, and head down to for dancing?" Pierre asked as he grabbed his shot glass, and lifting it up to, while nodding his head to the way of the dance floor.

"Oh my God, I thought you would never asked!" Roxy jumped up, drank the shot immediatelly. She nearly tripped over the other chairs, but Viki got hold on her arm, saving her from faceplanting the floor. "Whoo! Let's go girls!" She grabbed Viki's arms and started to run down to the way there pulling our other friend behind her.

"So can I have a dance with you m'lady?" Pierre bowed infront of me, and all I could do was giggling. I nodded my head and we clinked our shot glasses together and drank the shot. "Cheers to us for this vacation." He winked at me.

"Cheers!" I smiled back and he grabbed my hand starting to pull me after him, following the way where my friends left. We were dancing for what it felt like hours. Somehow Pierre's friends started to mingle in with our group, started to dance with my friends. I was sweating, the weather was still hot and it was really humid, I could feel that my hair started to cling to my skin on my neck. When a song ended I felt like I need to get out of the crowd and sit down a little bit. I found a sun bed and plopped myself down on it. I was wathcing the waves licking the white sanded beach calmly. There were thousand of stars shinning on the sky, I even saw a few shooting stars in the dark sky.

"Is everything okay?" I turned my head back on the sunbed looking up at the tall figure above me. Pierre squatted down next to the headboard of the sun bed.

"Yes, I just needed some air." I smiled at him. "It's really warm in there, and I was just sweating"

"Maybe we should have some bevarage so you can cool down a little bit" He swiped some hair out of my face and tucked a string of hair behind my ears. While he was studying my face with a warm smile."Or we can go for a swim." He started to smile mischeviously while his other hand grabbed my ankle.

"No please, I don't want to get my dress wet!"I started to pull my leg out of his embrance, and getting up from the bed. "I like this dress way to much to let it ruined by salty water." He giggled while I tried to pull down on the edge of the dress, which travelled up from the movements.

"You do look incredible in this dress" He smiled and licked his lips. I tucked another sting of hair out of my face and smiled back at hime and looked down on the ground to hide my blush.

"Thanks, so you were mentioning something about a drink right?" I looked at him, and he started to chuckle, grabbing my hand pulling me after him to the bar. We were sipping on our drink when a really familiar song started to blast through the speakers. I have realised the song from the first 3 beats, and I knew that my two best friends also did because they were running out from the crowd to our way while they were screaming. It was the Super Trouper by ABBA. This song meant a lot for the three of us, we grew up on retro songs but definetly on ABBA ones. Roxy's mum loves ABBA and she was listening it allday long when we were hanging out at their place. We used to act like we were singers and had a full blown ABBA concert. We had coreographies and everything too, even we have had customs to be a full experience. This song was especially a favourite for us, and it meant a lot. So when I saw the girls running to my way, smiling and screaming I knew right away what is comming.

"Gina! Do you hear this?" Viki was pointing to her ears "You know what does it mean, right?" They were holding their hands out for me to grab it. I looked at Pierre who was sitting next to me on the barstools while his friends sat next to him. They were looking at us curiously waiting for what will happen. I smiled at him, and looked back at my friends.

"Sorry I have to have this dance with them, it's an obligatory tradition since we were six." I grabbed their hands and they pulled me down from the stool. We walked a few steps away from the bar, standing in a half circle, and as soon as the singing part started we were screaming it from the top of our lungs. The song nearly ended, we were singing, dancing the same choreography we came up as kids and laughin together, when the music got lower and the DJ started to speaking.

"Ladies and gentlemen, I'm sorry to interrupt the song but I have heard we have three ladies, who are huge fans of ABBA since they were kids, and as I could see from here they even got prepared with a full choreography. As I have heard they are having a bachelorette party, so please people let them do their performance." We were looking eachother confused while the crowd started to separate and everyone was looking at us. When he finished he turned the music louder again. We were getting closer on the last chorus part, and we were entitled and looking at eachother. I was the first one who woke up from the shock and I grabbed my friends arms trying to get their attention too.

"This is the last chance for us to have a performance of our lives" I laughed at them and waited for them to agree with me, they started to smile and both of them gave a high five to me. We totally lost ourselves in the music we just only paid attention to the three of us. It started as a fun activity but by the end of it, I felt like I'm getting emotional. This trip wasn't a normal girls trip, it was a closure. The thing that Roxy is getting married meant that our young and free life, our girlhood officially ended. We grew up, I know that we are adults, we turn adults legally as soon as we turn 18, we turn adults in our parent's eyes when we graduate high school. And it's normal, and totally fine. But swallowing that you turn adult when you are started to think about tying your life together with someone else, starting a family, it hits different. Also I know well enough that with this our relationship won't end, it will just change a little bit, and that is how life works. As I was singing the lyrics of the song my eyes started to water, clouding my sight. I looked at my friends and I realised they have had the smae thoughts in their heads, and they were getting emotional too. We reached the last three lines of the song, and I looked at Viki, and grabbed her hand while we stepped away from Roxy.

"Super Trouper beams are gonna blind me. But I won't feel blue. Like I always do. 'Cause somewhere in the crowd there's you. (x)"

As singing out the last word of the song we pointed at our best friend's way, and I winked at her. It was enough to look at Roxy's expression and the three of us started to cry, we stepped closer to eachother and hugged.

"Szeretlek titeket! (I love you guys so much!)" We said it at the same time, Roxy was crying and clinging to us really hard. We only separated when we heard clapping behind us, and we stepped away from each other. Trying to gather ourselves together, and I looked back and I saw Pierre and his friends cheering on us. All we did just grabbing each other's hand and bowed in front of the guys.

----------------------------------------------

It was later that evening when we left the club, the guys insisted that they are not letting us to walk home alone, so they left with us also. As soon as we stepped out of the club, I grabbed on Pierre's shoulder and I took off my highheels.

"Oh God, this is felling is nearly as good as an orgasm" I sighed as I felt the cold concreat under my feet. Pierre just looked down at me and chuckled.

"Come on small stuff, we have to get you three home. Maybe without those torture devices you can actually walk in a normal tempo with those tiny legs. " He giggled as he put his arms around my shoulder, pulling me closer to his body. I let my right arm wrapped around his waist as I was trying to find some support to have as minimum weight on my sore and hurting feet as it's possible. "Tomorrow we have rented a boat out. If you want to come we are happy to have you guys there." He looked at my other friends too who were walking next to us chatting away with his friends.

"A boat, just if you guys have jetskies!" Roxy pointed at him with a huge grin on her face.

"Then it's settled because we have actually four jetskies on that boat." Pierre answered back to her with a wink. We reached our rented house and I opened the door with my key and let the girls in. " See you tomorrow Chérie" He looked at me with a warm smile and leaned closer as he pressed a kiss on my cheek, again close to the corner of my mouth. As he stepped back he looked up and down on me again, and when his eyes connected with mine he winked at me.

I don't know how long I was staning in the door, looking at them to walk away, but I only realised that I'm still outside when the two girls grabbed my arms and pulled me inside.

"Okay so you have to tell us about this guy!" Viki was studying my face with narrow eyes, as Roxy was jumping up and down nodding while she was shaking my arm.

"So, do you guys remember that I mentioned about the Hungaroring and the Grand Prix?"

"Yes, and you mentioned that you have met a guy there too, who you were texting in the past few weeks nonstop. I mean I'm happy that you have multiple guys interested in you don't get me wrong, but ...." Viki continued "Roxy stop bouncing it's bothering me, and you will turn your stomach up and you will be sick." She scolded our smaller friend, who stopped bouncing and had a sad look on her face with her mouth turning downwards.

"Okay, that is true but I did not show you any pictures of the guy and I did not give away anything about his identity." I was looking back and forth the both of them, while I was trying to hide my smile. " This guy, who we have spent the last few hours with him and his friends, it's actually Pierre Gasly. " I stayed silent for a little bit waiting for them to run the name in their heads. They were not into F1 that much, they watched a few races with me any my brothers but nothing more. "He is an F1 driver for Alpha Tauri" I explained because I could see on their faces they had no idea what was I talking about.

"O, yea I knew that this dude was familiar from somewhere." Roxy stated. She had her index finger on her chin trying to act like she was really thinking hard.

"Anyway, so the guy who I was texing and the guy who we have spent the night with, is actually the same person." I rambled out fast and waited eagerly for their answer. I had my hands in front of my mouth hiding my smile behind it. They stayed silent for a few seconds looking at me with a blank expression on their face, their mouth was sligthly apart. After a few seconds Viki was the first one who got out someone from herself.

"What?" That was the only thing that came out of her mouth.

"No way, you went on a date, and had been texting with a famous F1 driver. Who is at the same island, at the same time as us. And we just spent the whole night with them? And they have invited us to their boat? " Roxy was rambling all over while she was grabbing on her hair. "Dude, she outmastered us! No fucking way" She squealed and hit Viki's arm who was still looking at me as I just had two heads on my neck. " Your story with that fake African prince is nothing compared to this" She laughed as she pushed on Viki's shoulder to wake her up.

[quokkacore]

eventual [rest]

hi guys. i’m sorry for never coming through with updates, but i’m kind of going through it at the moment.

ignoring the things going on in my personal life… i’m tired. i chose tumblr as my fanfic platform because of the community and how much i enjoyed being able to interact with others. it’s just not the same. recently there’s been a small influx of feedback (for which i’m extreme grateful and will be responding to soon!!!) but it’s just. maybe i’m asking for too much but it feels like too little too late. its so upsetting seeing “xyz has reblogged x post” and clicking on it, and AS ITS LOADING telling myself “don’t get your hopes up it’s probably empty”.

i deserve better. writers deserve better. i’m doing this for free and for fun and i get so little in return when i could be working or doing my homework and actually working towards my degree. not to brag, but i KNOW i’m at the very least, a decent writer. i’ve started setting my sights on traditional publishing despite how difficult it is to break through because i feel like i’m good at what i love doing. but i don’t want to do it on tumblr anymore. i don’t feel the drive to.

if you’d like to read about some of my other reasons, it’s below the cut, but a lot of it is me discussing triggering topics—pls be careful.

if you don’t feel like reading below the cut for my reasoning as to why i’m going to eventually stop posting, here’s what i want everyone to know:

i’m going to TRY to finish king & lionheart, with great power and the punisher anthology, because i love these stories so, so much. the updates will come when they come—i’m not changing my updates page, but i’ll at least try to give a few days heads up that they’re coming.

once i’m done with these fics, i don’t think i’ll write anything else on this blog. maybe, maybe not—i think it depends. i’m just all out of steam.

this blog will remain up mainly an archive, mostly because i know how upsetting it is to want to reread a fic and finding out the author deactivating. i’ll delete some posts, and if i post anything, it’ll be feedback for nsfw fics or answering certain asks. who knows, maybe i’ll drop something here and there.

i’ll eventually be going through my follower list and removing any ageless blogs or blogs who i know are minors on this main blog, something i should have done a long long time ago.

finally, i’ll be setting up an nsfw free side blog and using that as my “main” if you guys would like to keep contact with me. this isn’t just gonna be kpop but my other interests as well (but mostly kpop). i’ll also be posting sfw fic recs there. the blog is @threesrachas if any of y’all are interested!!

other than that, thank you so much to my mutuals and the ppl who made my time on tumblr so much fun. i loved getting to know and work with so many of you, you’re all amazingly talented, kind and funny people. thank you for being my escape from real life, i love you all so much for that.

tw: intense homesickness + generally bad mental health + self harm + hypersexuality

as some of you might know, i moved continents to study abroad last year. that’s a big part of what’s impacting me—i’m away from my main support system, i’m worried about issues within my family, as much as i want to deny it i feel like i’m losing my friends back home, i have to be financially independent and rely on myself to pay for things like tuition, groceries, health insurance, etc etc. it’s caused me so much stress and i feel like i’m being pulled in a MILLION different directions.

i kind of… don’t feel like myself. i wouldn’t call it disassociation because from the reading i’ve done my situation isn’t as severe. but i just feel so lost and disconnected from everyone around me. i feel like i’m unsure of where i want to go and how to move forward with things i know i need to do, but i don’t know how to bring myself to go through with them even though it’ll only be detrimental to me in the future.

i’m also realizing that my hypersexuality is becoming more and more of an issue as i go onward. and with this, i’m giving everyone a warning—i’ve been in the tumblr/ao3/wattpad fanfiction space since i was 12, and only at 21 am i beginning to realize just how detrimental that was for me. consuming so much nsfw content as a minor caused me to normalize and glorify certain sexual behaviors in an unhealthy way, and recently i’ve stumbled across more violent sexual content and the way that my brain has fixated on it terrifies me. i probably need to speak to someone about it.

as a result of these things, i’ve started self-harming again after being clean for like,, 5 years, and i hate myself so much for it. i thought i was finally better and i could finally put it behind me, but apparently not.

i just need more time for myself. my free time feels consumed because i get anxious for not writing, and i hate it. i need to take better care of myself and that’s not going to happen if i down scale back on my wips and unfinished fics. i want to get better. i miss being better, so so much.

tagging my mutuals: @doderyscoffee @iwishihadabettername @thegoodthebadandtheempty @always-wishing-for-rain @lix-ables @multifcndoms @lixesque @jl-micasea-fics @christallise @lixtokki @the7thcrow @sweetlemontart @heartcravings @itsapapisongo @lotus-dly @cherrydumpling @ohmysparkle @aliceu @milfgyuu @ncteaxhoe @moonctzeny @illicitfuck @lixhues @spilledtee @just-come-baek @feelsaesthetic @minthoodie @justhereinmydarkcorner @seulgiswhoreee @jeongvision @heejinnien @softcrescendo @sleepylixie @jenoentry @jaehyyns @chanluster @missskzbiased @smileyjaeminies @ynvngwolff @lamaiejeno @wonjaekook @moonbeamsung @puppywritings @danishmiilk @saturnznct @nightshade-minho @ncweab @ichigofelix @whosjunglejim4322 @nyctophilin and i’ll be tagging the rest soon </3

[tinisprouts]

The Façade of Happiness

Chapter Two - Forward They Persist

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Synopsis: Kel always seemed the happiest out of his childhood friends; back then and now, and maybe in a way, he was if he just didn't think too hard about it. But when he heard of Sunny's soon departure, Kel knew he had to try and reach out to him again. All is well, everyone had come back together again and Kel could say he was happy. Yet, it is falling apart once again after Sunny reveals the truth behind Mari's death. Kel wasn't there for his friends the last time, he didn't have the capability. It was different now, he would make sure he wouldn't lose his friends this time, not after finding real happiness.

Word Count: 2.5k+

Warnings: Basil talks about s*ici*e in the beginning of the chapter, proceed with caution!

Although Kel was not as keen on emotions as others, Basil found he surprisingly was a good listener. He also noticed how well Kel could keep a poker face despite the horrible things Basil told him. Basil wondered if Kel had always been like that. From his memory, he was typically very expressive, heart on his sleeve. His giveaways were when his hand would tense in Basil’s and the inflections of his occasional words.

"Why did you hold it in for so long? Why didn't you just tell the truth?" Basil thought and then thought some more, trying to find the right words, till his thought consumed him becoming darker. But before he could sink deeper, he was pulled out, by a firm squeeze from Kel while the boy called his name, worried.

"I- I never wanted to believe that Sunny did something like that. I wanted to believe it was something else," Basil lets out a strangled half chuckle, "So hypocritical, I know. How could I do something like that to Mari's body? At some point, it wasn't just about protecting Sunny; it was about protecting myself, from the truth, from what I did…."

Kel felt his throat growing tighter at Basil's words. Would he have done the same in Basil's position, he figured he would never know. "Is that why you and Sunny fought?"

"I think Sunny had come to terms with everything, but I was still in denial. I snapped; I wanted to get rid of the thing I thought was controlling Sunny, so I…. Kel, something is wrong with me; I need help. If Sunny didn't try to stop me, I was ready to end it. I was going to kill myself! But I don't want to die; I was just so tired, and I'm still tired." Basil couldn't stop the tears if he wanted to. Kel's heart broke, just how helpless and alone Basil must have felt? Why didn't he realize? Why couldn't he have been more perceptive? Why, why, why?! 

Kel could only scoop up Basil's fragile body in his arms, hugging him so firmly, hoping that if just for a moment, he could forget the feeling of loneliness. He repeated the words he kept close to his heart, the words he would repeat to himself every day before getting out of bed, the treasured words from Mari that gave him hope for the future. "It'll be okay, Basil. It's going to get better, I promise."

Basil clung to Kel like he was his only lifeline in a chaotic sea that was ready to swallow him whole. Maybe he would feel embarrassed about it later, but it felt good to let it all out, so Basil cried like a baby. Crying to exhaustion, till his sobs quieted to sniffles, till he could feel how good Kel's hug was and realize how much he missed them. The pounding in Basil's heart slowed, as he slackened his hold on Kel. He took this as his sign, and Kel oh so carefully pulled away till he could see Basil's face again, this time Kel was holding both of Basil's hands.

"I'm sorry, I got your shirt all wet." Kel looks down at his jersey, spotting a big wet spot on his chest.

"That's okay, we are matching,” Basil looks at his shoulder, and there on his gown is an equally big wet spot, which causes him to smile. Hesitant Kel brings up his concerns, “Basil, I don’t want to leave you alone right now, but I’m worried about everyone else. You saw how Aubrey reacted, Hero didn’t even say anything, and Sunny….” Basil’s smile became wistful.

“You can go Kel, I’ll be okay.” Kel searched Basil’s eyes to see if Basil really meant it, but he couldn’t be sure.

“I’ll call you. You have to pick up, alright?”

“Of course, but you should hurry if you want to see Sunny. I talked to his mom when she visited me a few days ago, she said she wanted to leave as soon as Sunny was able, and I think he’s ready to go now. I’ve already taken a lot of your time so you don’t have much left.” Kel is shocked he didn’t think they would leave so soon. Sunny had only woken up from surgery a week ago, but he had been in a dazed state since then like his mind was somewhere far away. He didn’t talk at all, till today; was he really okay to go? Kel was going to find out.

"Thanks, Basil. I'll call you as soon as I'm out! Let's give Sunny a proper goodbye." Kel was feeling now that he knows he was on a time crunch, maybe Sunny was already gone. Basil waves Kel off with a smile. When Kel was out the door his smile faded as he thought. He was alone now, but he didn't feel as lonely as before.

Basil occasionally wondered how his childhood friends would act if they knew. Worried they would hate him and he would no longer be loved by them. If they somehow still loved him, would it be less? Would he still be valued as a human? Would they still look him in the eyes?

Aubrey and Hero couldn't look at or speak to him and Basil could understand why. If he was them he wasn't sure if he'd have the capacity to forgive so easily. Yet, Kel looked at Basil, held him, and promised not to leave him; He couldn't understand that. But he wanted to take the kindness that was given to him. 

I lost Grandma, Sunny, Aubrey, and Hero…, but I still have Kel and Polly. Basil thought about the two; Kel still stayed despite everything. Polly, sure she didn't know, but she cared for Basil these past 2 years and he always shut her out emotionally, and she still comes to see him every day even though she is busy taking care of things at home. His parents only bothered to visit for one day before deciding it wasn't serious.

Basil thought it was enough, more love than he deserved. Still, Basil would try to be worthy of it, to love them in return. To live for tomorrow that would surely be better than yesterday. To love himself on days when it was hard. Despite everything, Basil would love. Grandma would've liked that…

The buzzing of his phone snapped him out of his thoughts, and Kel's name was displayed on the screen, causing Basil to smile wholeheartedly. Even though it had only been a few minutes, Kel was relieved when Basil answered his call. Starting their conversation about nothing in particular as Kel was speed-walking to Sunny’s house. Kel made Basil feel like they never even had their tearful conversation and he appreciated the normalcy of their interaction. 

"Basil, I see Sunny! You're right he looks like he's about to leave." Basil hears Kel call for Sunny and he tries to imagine what both of their faces look like right now. Kel laughed, "He looked. One moment Basil." He could hear Kel running to Sunny and the way he tried to catch his breath when he stopped.

"Kel?" Sunny's voice was only heard faintly through the phone.

"Hey Sunny, Hello Ms. Tokimitsu." 

"What ar-," Sunny is cut off by the loud voice of his mom.

"Oh my Kel, look at you, it's still so surprising to see how big you've gotten!" Kel grins. "You must be here to say goodbye to Sunny?"

"Yeah, me and Basil," he says, holding his phone towards them showing he was on call. Basil and Sunny's mom exchange a few words.

"Well, I'll just finish talking the rest in the car, you can stay here Sunny." She left before Sunny could even come up with a response.

"Why did you come here?" Sunny questioned.

"I said I'd see you later." So he really did mean it. "I didn't mean to send you off like that at the hospital…. Me and Basil wanted to see you off, well I guess Basil can't really see you but you get it, haha." Kel was determined to see Sunny, but now that he was in front of him he didn't know what to say. In the awkward silence, Basil spoke.

"Sunny…, I'm sorry. I wish I could take back what I did, everything. As selfish as this sounds, I hope one day you can forgive me." Sunny looked for the right words, there was so much between them, they had given each other lifelong scars that would connect them for the rest of their lives.

"I've already forgiven you Basil and I'm sorry too, for so many things. But we can't change the past. I think the best thing we can do is forgive ourselves and move forward…. At least I feel like that's what Mari would say." 

Mari, Sunny felt how her name rolled off his tongue so easily. He would never say her name before like it was a word that would burn his insides, just she, her, my sister. Now it came from his mouth as it should. He already made the decision to cherish everything that was left of Mari.

"Yeah, that sounds like something Mari would say. Then let’s both try to live happier lives. I don’t really know how to do that, but I have people that want to help me…. I hope you can find the people that want to help you too.” There was a loud creak and the shut of a door coming from Basil’s end. They could only hear one end of a short conversation before Basil spoke to them once again, “I should get going, but Kel can you hand the phone to Sunny I just need to tell him something.”

“Uh yeah, sure.” Kel was taken aback but obliged, taking his phone off speaker mode for the first time since the start of their call and handing it over to Sunny. 

“Hello?” Sunny questions.

“Sunny, I have a favor to ask.”

“What?”

“I don’t think I can do it right now, but can I tell Polly about everything? …I’d like it if she knew.” Sunny’s eyes widened as he connected the dots. Polly is one of the people that want to help Basil. 

“It’s just as much your secret, as it is mine. Besides, I already told everyone the secret without asking you, it doesn’t matter to me.”

“Ah, thank you. Um, also, Kel was telling me how you don’t have a phone and he was really sad about that. If you can help it, keep Kel by your side, he really cares about you." A light flush spreads across Sunny's face without his notice as he rubs at the back of his neck.

"Yeah, I've been realizing that." Sunny steals a glance at Kel seeing he has his head turned looking at nothing in particular. Kel could feel Sunny's stare so he looked back causing Sunny to avert his gaze, his face becoming noticeably warm. Kel felt even more awkward just standing there, like suddenly he had become a third wheel. 

"Well, I really should go now, I want to spend some time with Polly. Bye, Sunny."

"Bye Basil." Sunny hands the phone back to Kel and exchanges goodbyes with Basil as well before hanging up, and putting away his phone. Sunny is the first to speak, "Kel, thank you for coming for me."

"Of course, I have to give you a proper goodbye!" 

"No, well yes this too, but I mean for knocking on my door. If it wasn't for you…" 

"Don't mention it. I tried at first but at some point, I gave up trying to be there for you. Just think of it as me making good on my promise to Mari." Kel smiled at the memory that only he, Sunny, and Mari shared. The corner of Sunny's mouth quirked into a grin as he laughed through his nose, recalling the memory as well.

"Do you think you can keep your promise after this?" Sunny held out his pinky, "It's going to be hard making new friends and-" Kel snatched up the pinky wrapping it with his own. 

"I already decided I wasn't going to desert my friends. Whenever you need me just call and I'll be there for you." Sunny let go of Kel's pinky but kept his hand raised, hesitation clear in his eye. He realized he would miss Kel a lot more than he originally thought and hesitation became longing. Doing the unexpected, Sunny's hand finally reaches out and he goes in for a hug, cherishing his friend. 

"Aww Sunny, you don't have to be shy about wanting a hug!" Kel wrapped Sunny up in a big bear hug. Joy and regret mingled if only he had knocked on the door earlier. If he could spend just a little more time with Sunny. He wished that Sunny didn't have to go, and he hugged him tighter like it could stop him from leaving. "You have to come visit, Sunny." Kel choked on his words, there was more, so much more he wanted to say but they were all stuck in his throat.

"Mmn, I'll come knocking this time." Kel chuckled, tears pricking the corners of his eyes. Kel pulls away first wanting to wipe away the build-up of tears.

"You better, or I'll come find you." Sunny shook his head at Kel's silly reply. As if on cue Sunny's mom came out of the house carrying an open box of stuff. The boys saw how she fumbled with the key while still holding the box. Kel ran up to her, taking the box from her arms. "Don't worry, I got it."

"Oh, thank you." Kel carries the box to the car while she locks the door for the last time. Taking a few steps back, she looked at everything she was leaving behind. There were so many memories that came with this house, the good and the bad, it would stick with her for the rest of her life. Her eyes landed on the roof where she spotted, Mari? Like a ghostly apparition, Mari was smiling as she waved goodbye to her mother.

She stared and stared until she couldn't see through her tear-filled eyes anymore. She shut them, wiping at her face, but when she looked back Mari was gone. Sunny's mother waved back at where Mari was, saying goodbye to her daughter. She walks back to the car where Kel has shut the trunk.

"Alright, now we are all packed up again. It's time to go Sunny."

"Wait, can I get your phone number so I can stay in contact with Sunny?" She smiles, thankful her son really has a good friend.

"Of course." After exchanging numbers she says goodbye to Kel before stepping inside the car and starting the ignition. Sunny and Kel looked at each other.

"I'll see you later." Kel holds out his fist waiting for Sunny.

"Later." Sunny lightly bumps his own against Kel's. Just like that Sunny gets inside the car. Kel watches as they drive away waiting till they are out of view and he sighs. I need to check on Aubrey.

Kel felt doubt in his own abilities, could he help Aubrey? Did she even want him to? Would he just make things worse? These were the same fears that kept him from going to her when they were younger, he wasn't going to make the same mistake twice.

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[the-teddy-bear-butch]

More Ronance music thoughts 4 u

“The Village, The Wolf, and The Boy” by Taylor Berrett is a Robin Buckley anthem, argue with a wall <33

I’m thinking so hard about her singing this to Nancy, or at least with Nance in mind, especially their shared fear of coming out in the 80s

The literal first line is “I wanna see the world”

Robin wants to get out of Hawkins and she wants to travel, and this line reflects that. It talks about chasing after a girl, something she wants but is scared too do, she can’t bear it

The song talks about giving up and closing eyes—closing off that part of herself, closing the door to the opportunity of love because she’s terrified of rejection or becoming a social pariah—until she meet Nancy

The chorus for one, is definitely giving Ronance

So if you've got an anxious heart

You're not the only one

And I won't let you fall apart

If you don't let me run

Robin has been shown time and time again to be kind of an anxious person. She has a cool and calm outward exterior in S3, but in 4 we see her let those walls come down and reveal the nervous rambling mess she is on the inside. She could be comforting Nancy, telling her she’s not alone in her fears (maybe after Nancy confesses her feelings, but says she’s scared because it’s Hawkins in the 80s). She comforts Nancy, tells her she won’t let Nancy fall apart if Nancy stays with her and helps her learn to not run away (operation Croissant, anyone?). The previous lyrics also could be her comforting Nancy, “hey, you’re not alone, I’ve been there, this is how I feel”

The song talks about breakdowns and laughing it off, which is such a Robin thing to do. “Romanticizing the cost,” perhaps the cost of baring her soul to one Nancy Wheeler? Opening her rib cage to offer her heart to the other girl, knowing it could cost her everything, but being so hopelessly in love that it’s worth it?

And the boy says something's wrong

But the people don't believe

And the wolf comes in tonight

When your mind is trying to sleep

The boy would be Robin and Nancy, saying this prejudice is wrong, because really, how can love be wrong? How can the soft sweetness between them, the warmth of holding each other through the night and comforting each other through nightmares, how can it be wrong? But people don’t believe—it’s Hawkins in the 80s. The wolf is their own internalized fears and self doubt, the comphet that plagues Nancy, the fear of being outcasted that haunts Robin’s dreams. But now they have each other to hold through the night, to chase the wolf away

Robin being a feral werewolf as a metaphor for her suppressed feelings and fears, anyone? This big, ugly, angry beast that wants to hurt those that might hurt her, but sees Nancy and calms immediately, because she’s so in love it’s bleeding out of her? Or even the opposite, with werewolf Nancy? Werewolf girlfriends even?

And I'll make up ways to steal my joy

And when it's real I don't believe it

And I swear it's just like being

The village, the wolf and the boy

Think about how many queer people NOW who have struggled with internalized homophobia and fear of coming out and comphet and tell me even seemingly cool and confident Robin doesn’t struggle even more in the 80s. She can’t help but overthink and imagine what would happen if she let herself feel, let herself be free to love who she loves. It’s like she has the boy, the homophobic words of her neighbors, and the internal fears of the wolf tearing her up all at once.

I wanna feel the sun

And find out what the truth is

And chase after a girl

'Cause no matter how it breaks me

I can't bring myself to hate this world

But despite all this, despite the constant inner battle, despite the way the world would view them, Robin is tired of hiding. She’s been tortured by Russians, fought literal monsters, seen the cold of the Upside-Down—and she’s felt the warm sun of Nancy’s smile, known the softness of her touch, drowned in the fondness in her eyes, and she knows

She’s knows it’s worth it. The world may break them down, but they have each other, she’ll tell Nancy. They have each other, and because of that, maybe the world isn’t so bad. They’ll be okay, they’ll put each other back together, and in the warmth of each other’s arms, they’ll each find it’s hard to hate the world the other lives in

[sirotterling]

Comforting Big Pup

Inu!Gonta x reader

I let out an exhausted sigh as I went up the stairs to get to my apartment, legs feeling heavy with each step I took as I reached the landing at the top of the steps, giving me only a short walk I needed to take to get to my door. As I was getting through the front door I was immediately greeted with hurried footsteps approaching me, and before I could react, two strong arms wrapped around my small figure; pulling me into a buff chest, bringing me into a tight hug. Struggling to move, I was able to see my tall roommate’s fluffy long green hair and ears as he nuzzled into my neck licking it happily. “ Gontaaa stop it that tickles.” I said tiredly trying to gently pull him away as he licked my neck happily from excitement. 

“Gonta, please I'm tired buddy.” my voice was muffled a bit as I practically pawed at his muscular back. It seemed to do the trick; cause he lifted his head immediately to observe my tired face, his tail wagging slow down from councern. “Miss y/n alright? Nothing happen to her did it!?” Gonta spoke worriedly, ears shifting downwards as he looked over my face for injuries of any sorts that could be making me feel so drained; however it wasn’t anything physical that was making me feel this way, no it was something deeper, more darker than that. My thoughts were interrupted by the feeling of the air coming from Gonta’s nastrols as he sniffed me, most likely sniffing for blood. Patting his back however seemed to do the trick, cause he stopped his action and looked at me intently, waiting for me to speak.

“Gonta, I'm fine. Well physically at least, however meantally i’m just feeling tired, drained even you know? Just not feeling myself.” Gonta’s head tilted in confusion from my statement, most likely trying to understand what I mean, eyebrows frowned as he thought of my words carefully. “Gonta not fully understand how miss y/n feel, but Gonat try his best to make miss y/n feel better!” His voice was determined and ready to do anything for me to feel better. A small tired smile sprouted on my face from how eager he was to make my day better, but he doesn’t even know that coming home to him waiting for me, so that he can greet me each morning is enough to warm my heart.

“Thank you Gonta, but you being here is helping me enough; my big puppy.” I reassured, reaching my hand up to pet him on the head and scratch behind his ear. Triggering Gonta’s ears to perk up along with his tail wagging happily from the physical affection, causing him to tighten his embrace on me. “ Alright Gonta you can cuddle me more when we get to the couch, cause I'm still tired big boy hehe.” I chuckled, ending my request by patting his back once again. He happily let go of me and quickly made his way to the living room while I followed calmly behind him.

By the time I got to the living room; i could already see him sitting at the end of the couch looking in my direction happily waiting for me to lay on the couch. I couldn't help but smile at his innocence. As I walked to the couch I didn’t notice the oversized knitted sweater that he was wearing up until now. It was the one I made him for Christmas, he was upset that he couldn’t find any sweaters that fit him, so I secretly made him one for the holidays so he wouldn’t feel so left out and of course he was enthusiastic about it. He would wear it almost everyday, that's how much he loved it. Heat rose to my face however when I saw that Gonta only had his briefs on with the sweater due to the fact i could see Gonta’s smooth bare legs closed together with his hands resting on his bare thighs,  this cuties gonna be the death of me.

Once at the couch I sat on the other end of the couch and lifted my feet up so that they may also rest on the couch cushions. I slid down the couch till my feet were touching Gonta’s thighs, this caused Gonta to crawl on top of me and lay his large head on my plush chest as he wrapped his arms around and under my body. He was heavy, but his weight was somewhat comforting. It felt like a big warm hug all over my body. I loved it. Past all of Gonta’s hair I could see his tail wagging excitedly as he nuzzled his head against my chest, I couldn't help but smile at his cuteness as I brought my hand up to play with his hair, gently combing his scalp.

His body completely relaxed from the light scalp massage, his eyes fluttering closed as he got s;leepier by the minute. “Hey Gonta?” Gonta lifted his head a little to look at me with sleepy eyes, “Yes miss y/n ?” He responded in a hushed voice,in response to his words I leaned down and kissed him on the forehead, “ Thank you, for being here for me.” Gonta gave a warming smile then leaned in to lick the tip of my nose, which is his way of giving a “kiss” so he says. “No need to thank Gonta. Gonta do anything to make Miss y/n happy, no matter what.” He says softly while nuzzling his head back down into my chest. I was almost in tears from how sincere he was; it just warmed my heart, but before I could say anything else to him about it, he was already sound asleep on top of me.

Letting out a sigh, I shifted a bit to get comfortable and gave Gonta one last kiss on the forehead before I myself drifted into the world of sleep as well and as I drifted off, I gave a soft final “Thank you, Gonta.”