#this is basically an excerpt from a short story

[ettawritesnstudies]

Etta's Guide to Writeblr (March 2023)

So you fled here from Twitter/TikTok... Where to start?

Welcome to Writeblr! Pull up a chair, open those documents, and pour yourself a cup of your favorite tea, coffee, or cocoa. The first thing you'll want to do is start following other writers. Check out this post for recommendations! Search through the notes to find hundreds more. Since I made that post, a bunch of people mentioned they're lurking and still trying to figure out tumblr, so I thought I'd make this post to help people get settled.

How to set up your blog

Make your blog name something not resembling a pornbot - it can be whatever you want, anything fun goes, just not [name###]. If you include "writer" or "author" somewhere in the url it makes it easier to spot writeblrs at a glance but it's not a requirement

Change your profile to something that's not the default, Make sure you have a blog title, and add a little description in your blog header if you feel like it!

Make a pinned post introducing yourself (pls don't use your real name or any IDing information for privacy's sake, this isn't facebook), a short summary of your WIPs, and links if you have an author's website/newsletter/ao3/etc. You can check my pinned post for an example

Make intro posts for each WIP! You can spruce these up with graphics (canva and unsplash are both great free resources to make edits/moodboards), excerpts, lists of tropes, character intros, etc. Link to the WIP intro in your pinned post so it's easy to find! You can update these as often as needed

If you want to make character intros, go wild. If you can't draw, piccrew is a great option. Just start talking about your WIP!

Come up with a tagging system to keep your blog organized. I recommend individual wip tags or at least one for your original writing in general so it's easy to search for your work on your blog

Keep track of Taglists for your WIPs. Whenever you post a new thing about your story, tag the people who asked to be notified to make sure they see it! Only tag people who ask to join the taglist, but it's a good way to keep track of interest. It's normal to have multiple taglists for each story+ one general writing taglist.

How to make writer friends

Reblog their work and add nice comments, either in the tags, comments, or the reblog itself People notice regulars in their notes and appreciate the attention. I promise it's not weird to compliment a total stranger

If that's too intimidating, community events are your friend!

Weekly Ask Games: These are weekly events that are loosely themed where writers send each other asks about their WIPs! The most common are Storyteller Saturday (about the writing process), Blorbsday (aka Blorbo Thursday about characters), and Worldbuilding Wednesday (about the setting of your story). If you answer these late, nobody really cares, but it's a fun way to receive prompts and learn more about other people's stories.

Ask Games/Memes: These are posts with lists of questions you can reblog from other people, sometimes themed or listed with emojis. It's common courtesy to send an ask from the list to the person you reblog it from, then people can send you questions as well, so you can talk about your stories! You can search for dozens of them

Tag games: There's a ton of different types of tag games, but basically someone @s you with a challenge/question, you reblog with your answer, and then @ a bunch of other people to continue the chain. Some common ones are Heads Up 7s Up (share the last 7 lines of your WIP), Last Line Tag (share the last line you wrote), and Find the Words (ctrl+f the given words in your doc and share the results, then give new words).

Formal events: These are community wide participation challenges organized by certain blogs! @writeblrsummerfest is every July?? August? I think? It's run by @abalonetea a few years strong, and there are daily prompts and ask games! @inklings-challenge is a month-long short story entry for Christian writeblrs. I think there was a valentines event in February. @moon-and-seraph is hosting a pitch week soon! Since these are more organized, it's very easy to find similar blogs and support!

Misc. Notes on using Tumblr

Follow the tags #writeblr and #writeblr community to find other writers, as well as other tags that interest you like #fantasy for example

If you want to bookmark a post to read later, you can like it and/or save it to your drafts

The queue/schedule function is very useful if you want to space out posts or have a backlog to keep your blog running when you get busy. This is good for the community because it gives older posts a chance to be rediscovered! You can change the posting frequency in the settings.

REBLOG YOUR OWN STUFF. People aren't always on at the same times and so it's the best way to account for people with different schedules and timezones. If you're worried about being annoying, you can tag those #self reblog or something similar and other people can filter the tag, but otherwise it's a welcomed and accepted practice.

If your excerpt is pretty long, put it under a cut. On desktop you can do this by selecting the squiggly button on the far right when you make a new paragraph, on mobile type :readmore: then hit enter.

It's polite to add descriptions to images and videos for visually or auditory impaired people. If you don't know how to write descriptions, here's a good resource

In your dashboard settings, it's best to shut off the options "Best Stuff First" and "Based on your Likes". These function as the website algorithm and suppresses the blogs you actually follow, which defeats the purpose of the site, letting the dash be in reverse chronological order. Also turn off Tumblr Live because it's malware as far as anyone's concerned.

Curate your experience, block the trolls, and be nice

Update for March 2024

How to shut off AI Scraping on your blog

Go to settings and find the Visibility tab

Scroll down to the tag that says "Prevent Third-Party Sharing"

Turn that knob over so that Automattic can't steal your work for their language training model databases >_<

The other settings will just hide your blog from search engines so they're useful for hiding from nosy parents or other Tumblr users but if you're trying to build an author platform you can leave them off.

Again, welcome to the community! I hope you have a ton of fun!

[ronearoundblindly]

Sneak Peek 💜💚💜

frat boy! Ari Levinson x college student!Reader

At a party with your boyfriend when things aren't going well between you, your old classmate--the notorious jock and man-whore, Ari--catches you in a weak moment...

Warnings for drinking/partying but not much else in this bit. (That might be a terrible summary for this excerpt but I made there too much going on to explain succinctly. My bad.) WC 720

The compulsion to be kind and quiet continues as you follow him out, tucking your hands under your arms so Billy won’t try to hold your hand, but it doesn’t matter. He walks ahead of you a few feet to keep up with his friends on the walk down the road to the Kappa house.

The two-story, plantation-style home is packed to the gills, making it hard to maneuver farther in than the front door, and of course, the first person you recognize is a brother of the fraternity living there.

Ari Levinson stands halfway up the staircase overlooking the crowd like a king surveying his domain, hair grown long and a beard worthy of his fifth-year undergrad status. He’s wearing a button-up linen shirt as if he just walked in from the beach, perpetually sun-kissed skin glowing, the carefree blue fabric matching his eyes.

Asshole.

He probably showed up to his own damn house, cocked his head, and smirked.

“Y’all having a party?” he probably asked, chill as fuck.

Idiot…probably. You don’t know what happened to him after Women’s Studies two years ago, but you can’t imagine he got better. Nothing changes.

His queen-for-the-day leans into his ear, her top half covered only by a red bandana and not much below that hidden by a miniskirt.

What sluts. Both of them. They deserve each other.

He’s so sexy though.

His smile is bright while he doesn’t spill the contents of his red Solo cup on anyone below him on the stairs. Seems his drunk coordination has improved since your freshman year at the very least.

“Babe,” you hear yelled close to your ear, “take it!”

Billy shoves one of two cups he’s carrying into your hands and shouts for you to follow him. He wants to play beer pong in one of back rooms downstairs with no room to stand and watch. There are no chairs, but Billy asks if want to play with him. In no reality would he think you’d answer ‘yes’ in this chaos, but then again, he hasn’t noticed you won’t take a sip of the drink you didn’t see poured either.

You yell back that you’re going to find a seat somewhere. Billy gets pulled off for the next partnered game.

The only open spot that isn’t a squeeze beside couples going at it in public is a bench underneath the cutout of the staircase. You took a detour to dump your cup in crowded kitchen’s sink and sit alone for a while, people-watching, wondering vaguely about the king and queen above you on the steps.

Parties…are not all that fun when you don’t feel safe.

You’re not sure how much time passes before a light blue linen shirt invades your view.

“Thirsty?” Ari asks casually, offering the only cup he carries.

You wave it off with a ‘no, thank you’ even though that should be sketchier than your boyfriend getting you a drink.

Ari takes a huge gulp and shuffles his broad body onto the too-short edge of the bench beside you. He seems careful not to touch you or invade your space, the barest graze of a short-sleeve cuff brushing the skin of your upper arm.

Again, Ari tilts the cup toward you. “Jack and coke,” he shrugs, lifting his eyebrows, “mostly coke though. I’ve been here a while. You’re basically late.”

He wouldn’t drug himself with anything, you imagine, and worst case, Ari’s already much drunker than you.

You pluck the half-full Solo from his hand and take a small sip. He’s right about one thing; you can’t smell or taste any alcohol.

Ari smiles softly.

“Where’s what’s-his-face?” He scans the hall. “Probably getting you something better, huh?”

You can’t help but frown and sigh as Ari takes another swig of soda, his pink lips nearly hidden beneath the hair of his beard, but you remember they are quite plump.

“Where’s your girlfriend?” you throw back, and keep your guess silent. Perhaps knuckle deep in the toilet?

Ari contemplates for a moment. “Flying with the pigs,” he settles on.

“What?”

He repeats himself, and then, seeing your confusion, he leans closer to clarify, “she doesn’t exist. I don’t have a girlfriend.”

Poor bandana girl. That’s a little harsh to be fobbed off so soon.

“So—”Ari elbows you gently “—how you been, smartie-pants?”

A/N: I cannot express to you the sheer amount of internal screaming I have done while writing this. He's...he's too...uhhhh my gawdddddd. He's too beautiful.

[Main Masterlist; Ko-Fi]

[contemplatingoutlander]

This is an excellent article by astrophysicist Dr. Adam Frank and theoretical physicist Dr. Marcelo Gleiser about how information from the James Webb Space Telescope is changing physicists' perceptions about the standard model of cosmology. 😱

Since how we understand the universe seems rather important, the link above is a gift🎁link to the article, so that even if you do not subscribe to The New York Times, you can read the entire article. Below are a few excerpts:

Not long after the James Webb Space Telescope began beaming back from outer space its stunning images of planets and nebulae last year, astronomers, though dazzled, had to admit that something was amiss. Eight months later, based in part on what the telescope has revealed, it’s beginning to look as if we may need to rethink key features of the origin and development of the universe. [...] But one of the Webb’s first major findings was exciting in an uncomfortable sense: It discovered the existence of fully formed galaxies far earlier than should have been possible according to the so-called standard model of cosmology. According to the standard model, which is the basis for essentially all research in the field, there is a fixed and precise sequence of events that followed the Big Bang: First, the force of gravity pulled together denser regions in the cooling cosmic gas, which grew to become stars and black holes; then, the force of gravity pulled together the stars into galaxies. The Webb data, though, revealed that some very large galaxies formed really fast, in too short a time, at least according to the standard model. This was no minor discrepancy. The finding is akin to parents and their children appearing in a story when the grandparents are still children themselves. [...] Working so close to the boundary between science and philosophy, cosmologists are continually haunted by the ghosts of basic assumptions hiding unseen in the tools we use — such as the assumption that scientific laws don’t change over time. But that’s precisely the sort of assumption we might have to start questioning in order to figure out what’s wrong with the standard model. One possibility, raised by the physicist Lee Smolin and the philosopher Roberto Mangabeira Unger, is that the laws of physics can evolve and change over time. Different laws might even compete for effectiveness. An even more radical possibility, discussed by the physicist John Wheeler, is that every act of observation influences the future and even the past history of the universe. (Dr. Wheeler, working to understand the paradoxes of quantum mechanics, conceived of a “participatory universe” in which every act of observation was in some sense a new act of creation.) [...] The philosopher Robert Crease has written that philosophy is what’s required when doing more science may not answer a scientific question. It’s not clear yet if that’s what’s needed to overcome the crisis in cosmology. But if more tweaks and adjustments don’t do the trick, we may need not just a new story of the universe but also a new way to tell stories about it. [color emphasis added]

Image caption: "These six galaxies may force astronomers to rewrite cosmology books. (Image credit: NASA, ESA, CSA, I. LABBE)"

___________ Gif source (before minor edits)

[phobos-exe]

Reading Wolverine comics after watching the movies has me absolutely falling in love with the "man or animal" motif that follows Logan literally everywhere.

// Marvel Comics Presents (1991): Issue #75

My favourite read so far is the short 4 issue series, Wolverine (1982), which the 2013 Wolverine movie is based on. Bascially it being about Logan trying not to lose Mariko to an arranged marriage and the cultural powers at play to which he isn't privy to. Furthermore, it absolutely dense with character-centered narrative with Logan's inner conflict surrounding the balancing act he must preform between embracing his animalistic side and his desire to be more than the killer he's always been, whilst he struggles with fitting into japanese society and the japanese underground. I could not reccomend it enough. Issue #3 is such a standout for me, all the excerpts provided are from it also.

One of the scenes i think highlight what im getting at with the motif is how Logan actively interprets an event that took place previously in the story. Earlier, he had fought Shingen (Mariko's father) to defend his own honor and for him to overrule Mariko's marriage so they may be together again, ultimately he not only loses but he humiliates and dishonors himself in the process. In this scene, he has a dream about the battle in a sequence that showcases what that humiliation actually meant for him in relation to his internal fight to let go of the animal he thinks himself of.

Despite how undisputable his physical strength is, the defeat he endures against Shingen crushes him and defines his motivations for the entire series. The words Mariko says in his dream, bascially defining him as a fraud and unworthy of her love, and the panel that follows this one saying he is also unworthy of life, is pretty indicative of his fear that his primal instincts- what he defines himself as -negates his noble aspirations to be a better man, overshadowing his morality.

It's also interestingly delved into with how his relationship with Mariko and his following romance with Yukio is contrasted in how they have an effect on Wolverine's internal conflict: Mariko's influence makes him want to strive for self-improvement, to appease her, while Yukio is able to accept who he is

Mariko's influence makes him want to strive for self-improvement, to appease her, while Yukio is able to accept who he is and his nature. The growth and control vs embracing your supposed truth serves as a new perspective to view Logan from. Basically, it's a reflection of how Logan himself is struggling to not only balance both aspects of himself, but also his struggle to accept them in the first place.

Going back to the films, I think they do a good job of adapting this method of symbolizing his self-reflection. For instance, in the origins movie, one of the conflicts I love from it is how this exact concept is adapted to Kayla and Victor. Kayla, being the stand-in for Mariko, motivates Logan to move past his animalistic side, literally telling him "you're not an animal, logan", whilst Victor is the force that wants him to ditch assimilation and embrace his mutations completely, though in this case it's much more violent and psychotic than Yukio's approach in the comic. The film version is a whole new exploration of his characterin its own right since it's more like these two opposing ideas are telling him what he should be, and the consequent struggle between what he should choose.

Though, and this is just my interpretation, what I appreciate most of this theme is that it managed to be so confusing for Logan that it circles back to being ironic. Because yes, he failed Mariko and he failed Yukio, he failed to assimilate to societal standards and he failed to be true to himself- whatever that really is -but I think one of his biggest failings is concluding for so long that he is an animal and therefore not a man, when in reality he has shown nothing but human desires, ambitions to change, to choose. He is an animal, it's just that that animal is a man.

[whatdoeseverybodywant]

MASTERLIST

SERIES:

You're the Only Girl for Me- [ONGOING]

All I Want Is You - [COMPLETED 8/29/2023]

LOVE - SEQUEL TO ALL I WANT IS YOU. - After getting back together, Janelle finds out thats she's pregnant. Follow along with Josh and Janelle as they deal with the highs and lows of her pregnancy. [ONGOING]

ALL FALLS DOWN- Kiyana Fatu's world is now in shambles after her husband comes home and tells her he has been having an affair. [COMPLETED 03/25/2024]

REBUILD & RESTORE - SEQUEL TO ALL FALLS DOWN [ ONGOING]

Neon Hearts - Chantelle aka Honey is a 33-year-old stripper who works at The Blue Thunder. What happens when a blast from the past blows his way back into her life. (COMING SOON)

DRABBLES/ONE SHOTS:

You're the Only Girl for Me ; May 200 Word Challenge - A part of my You're the Only Girl for Me series. Set in the future

YTOGFM - May 200 Word Challenge (2)- A part of my You're the Only Girl for Me series. Set in the future

REQUEST:

Miss Independent - Can you do a story where jey starts dating this girl and she is veryyyyy independent and like to do everything her self but jey has to always tell her to sit down and let him do basically Ms.I can do it myself meets mr.sit tf down imma do it plz 🤭

4 a.m Cravings - a part of my LOVE series but also requested. Request: heyyyyy can we get a short lil page or story of Janelle’s pregnancy cravings pls🤍🤍🤍

Jey Rizzo - Okay so yk how the raw before war games when they were mentioning how they needed a 5th member? Well, this universe, it’s a mixed war games so Rhea is in. Cody makes his “call” Randy and a former NXT, newly signed Keiarie or Kabana Love for her ring debut with them. Mr. Main Event takes a notice to her and tries to yk, get his game on the whole night with her

SERIES:

Sorry [ONGOING]

DRABBLES/ONE SHOTS:

May 200 Word Challenge - An excerpt from a One Shot that I have been working on for a while

Untitled - Jimmy Uso x OC (Alani) *

REQUEST:

The Bridesmaid- I hope you’re having a good day! I wanted to request a fic with Jimmy (or jey, I love them both) where the mc is a bridesmaid at their sister’s wedding and she meets one of the groomsmen (Jimmy) and they start to really like each other. The sister warns mc that Jimmy is a playboy but things start to heat up quick between the two anyway! You can add or take away any aspects, have fun with it. Thanks, I love your writing!

ONE-SHOTS

Til Further Notice - (based on Travis Scott's song) - He's been gone for 4 months. 118 days without a phone call or a text. What happens when he finally shows back up to work? Will he give Kaela the answers she's looking for?

Til Further Notice - The Reactions: How did the WWE universe react to the first time Roman was seen in 4 months...

ONE-SHOTS

Tongue-Tied -

[avidabsurdist]

Every time a new Brandon Sanderson book is released everyone updates their suggested reading order but all you need is the patience to be uninformed and enjoy the book!

But depending on your preference the best story to start with will be different.

If you want a crash course on the basics of The Cosmere's magic physics (Aka Investiture) so you can hypothesize on how other magic works I suggest the short story "The Emperor's Soul" as a starting point, it gives a solid overview of Realmic theory and covers Identity (a rather difficult idea to communicate) very effectively. (this is the start of the PhD route)

If you want something that's more like a traditional fairy tale as an intro I suggest Tress Of the Emerald Sea, which doesn't require a PhD in the shattering to understand. (though if you're going the PhD route I suggest reading this one later because if you're questioning the magic it's a far more confusing one)

Warbreaker is a good middle ground, if you're going the PhD route I suggest this second (it covers Intention which "The Emperor's Soul" doesn't), It's not a bad starting place either, it was my first book in The Cosmere and it's up for free on The Sand-Man's website. It's also all-around an excellent book.

I'm going to be (a tad) controversial and say I enjoy Elantris, it's certainly not Brando-Sando's best work but it was his first, and it's not a bad book to start with! just keep in mind that many of the issues in the book are things he improves on in later books.

Mistborn is two (soon to be 3) series, we distinguish them by 'Era' and they should be read in order if you want to make sense of what's going on.

Mistborn Era 1 (3 books) is also an excellent place to start, it's a YA-style series so you follow a teenager in a Post-(more like perpetual)-Apocalypse, but it's also an Epic high fantasy so if you like those and don't mind romance It's a good one.

"Mistborn Secret History": read this after Mistborn Era 1 if you're going the PHD route read anytime before The Lost Metal (Era 2 Book 4) for everyone else. (PhD track: if you want the most out of it I suggest also reading White Sand first)

Mistborn Era 2 (4 books) is a high fantasy Western set in the same world much later in time, 10/10 no notes, it's excellent.

The Stormlight Archive, TheBigOne™ It is planned to be a 10-book series with accompanying Novellas. I suggest reading in chronological order including the short stories, published so far that would be:

The Way of Kings

Words of Radiance

"Edgedancer" (novella)

Oathbringer

"Dawnshard" (novella)

Rhythm of War

Start with this series if you thirst for sprawling high-fantasy novels with page counts that would make grown men weep (the Audiobook for RoW was like 48 hours long)

The entirety of Arcanum Unbounded is not required reading, (unless you're on the PhD track) but it contains both "The Emperor's Soul" and "Edgedancer", you should probably read Elantris, Mistborn Era 1, Alloy Of Law (MB Era 2 Book 1), and Stormlight (up to Words of Radiance). If you enjoy Graphic Novels and dislike spoilers/rereading stuff when you haven't finished it yet I suggest skipping the White Sand excerpt.

White Sand is also not a terrible intro, it covers a theme in B-Sandy's work that isn't directly related to the cosmere but will give you a good insight into whether you'll like his work or not: the idea that skill is developed, not just inherent. if you're like me and dislike graphic novels GraphicAudio™ (actually a company not a joke) Has an Audio rendition that has some narrative differences from the Graphic novels (iirc at least one character is a different gender) But the Graphic novels also have a random boombox on a planet with no electricity so either should be fine.

Yumi and the Nightmare Painter is in a similar situation to Tress of The Emerald Sea except instead of a classic European Folktale Vibe it's got a Western Interpretation of Anime Vibe, ofc it's high fantasy like all Sandon Branderson's work so it's world is inspired by Japanese culture rather than just being Japanese.

The Sunlit Man read Shadows for Silence in the Forests of Hell (Arcanum Unbounded), and at least Oathbringer (Stormlight Archive 3) before this one, unless you like being thrown into the deep end, Mistborn Era 1 & 2 would also help.

There are other routes than Ph.D., there's also the Galactic Politics route, The Secret Society route, The Worldhopper Watcher route, The Ancient History route (Aka The Shattering route) ect

if you want specific reading route recs just tell me what you're looking for I can help!

[vilevenom]

Let's Be Us Again

Fandom: Dreamworks Trolls

Pairings: Hickory/John Dory

Summary:  Hickory was certainly the last troll John Dory thought he'd see after moving to Pop Village. To say it was a shock was a bit of an understatement. But they could pick up where they'd left off before, right?....right? Excerpt:

"John Dory," Hickory breathed, his eyes widening as they landed on John, the smile slipping from his lips.

"Oh! How do you two know each other?" Poppy asked, tilting her head slightly as she looked between the two, a curious smile on her face. Floyd glanced between them and shifted closer to his brother, as if he could tell that John was having a bit of an internal panic.

"That's a-uhm…a bit of a long story," John finally chuckled, his smile crooked as he spoke, "Probably, what? A couple of decades in the making?" Link to the fic on AO3 There's now a sequel! You can find it here or over on AO3

It was a day like any other, in John's humble opinion. The sun was shining, birds were chirping, and Poppy was banging at his door and shouting excitedly about her plans for the day.

Ever since they'd rescued Floyd from Mount Rageous, John Dory had been settled in Rhonda just outside of Pop Village. Poppy had taken this as explicit permission to bug the eldest brother with any and all tasks she felt could either "benefit from his previous experience as a band leader", or something she felt he'd genuinely enjoy. Which honestly, John was more than okay with. The pop queen had certainly grown on him, and he could easily see how she'd gotten his youngest brother wrapped around her finger.

Today, Poppy had requested John's help with some activities for aspiring singers that she'd set up at the community hall. She said she thought he'd be a great inspiration, and maybe he could help with teaching some basics about being in a band. He didn't really know how she figured that, given how he'd caused his own band to break up and not see each other for twenty years, but he supposed her heart was in the right place. She'd also managed to drag Floyd into it as well, so there was also that.

"I'm coming, Poppyseed," John laughed as he pushed open Rhonda's door and stepped into the sunshine. "Someone's impatient."

"Oh, I'm just so excited! The kids are gonna LOVE you guys! I made some of them listen to your old records and they got SO excited," Poppy practically squealed as she bounced on her toes. "I also thought we could stop by the market to grab some breakfast before we head over! There's a trading caravan from Lonesome Flats that rolled into town last night. There might be something new to try!"

John chuckled at Poppy's enthusiasm as he strolled over to Floyd, pulling his brother into a side hug. "Sounds like a plan, Popstar. How're you feeling, Floyd?"

The younger troll had been slowly but surely gaining his energy and health back since being freed from his diamond prison. When he'd first arrived in Pop Village he couldn't even leave Branch's bunker without an escort of at least two of his brothers to ensure they could get him back home if he collapsed. Now he simply needed a walking cane to help him get around, and a break every couple of hours to recoup his energy.

"I'm okay," Floyd sighed, smiling as he touched John's hand on his shoulder, "Feeling a little exhausted already just watching Poppy jump around, but I think today will be good."

John dipped his head in a short nod, giving his brother a friendly little shake before letting him go to strike a pose and point towards the market. "Then let's BRO!"

Poppy snorted at his antics, but skipped ahead of the brothers down the path towards the market, while Floyd rolled his eyes with a fond smile on his face.

~

Poppy hadn't been kidding about the caravan from Lonesome Flats. The market was practically overrun with country trolls - both those looking to trade or sell their wares, and those looking to bring something "exotic" back home with them. Children, both pop and country, ran amok through the crowd, nearly tripping just about anyone who wanted to move more than a foot through the area.

"Holy smokes!" John crowed as an especially rambunctious duo ran in front of him, causing him to stop fast and pinwheel his arms through the air to ensure he didn't fall over.

"Careful, old man," Floyd teased, poking his brother in the side with the end of his cane, "or you might be needing one of these."

"Shut up," John snorted, shoving Floyd lightly, making the younger troll catch himself with said cane as they both laughed.

"Oh my GOSH!" Poppy suddenly shrieked in front of the two of them, her shout causing a small handful of trolls to turn and look to see what she was yelling about. John and Floyd were among them - Floyd with a look of curiosity on his face, while John looked something like a puffalo caught in a searchlight.

"HICKORY!" Poppy screeched, before running off like a shot through the crowd, dodging around children and adults alike before practically tackling a troll to the ground some ways away from the brothers. The two glanced at each other, Floyd's expression changing from curiosity to one of worry even as John plastered a grin on his face.

"Let's go see who Poppyseed just put into the hospital, yeah?" John Dory said with a bit of a strained laugh, gesturing for Floyd to move ahead of him through the crowd.

Floyd narrowed his eyes at his brother, poking him in the chest before moving forward. "We're gonna talk about how you just looked like you swallowed a sour berry whole later, mister," he sniffed, before shuffling though the crowd, being mindful of his cane and the running children as he maneuvered around the other trolls in the market.

In the meantime, John rubbed absently at the spot Floyd had poked him while a million and one thoughts ran through his head. It couldn't possibly be his Hickory. The last he'd heard, he had gotten into some sort of accident on a mountain top and disappeared. At least, that was the rumor. He hadn't wanted to know anymore than that. He followed after his brother after a moment, bumping into and apologizing to a couple of trolls on his way as his mind wandered.

"-and then we had to fight some giants in order to get his brothers back! We totally hit the perfect family harmony and saved everyone." Poppy was just finishing a high speed ramble as the brothers approached, bouncing excitedly on her toes in front of a county troll with only two legs, his wide cowboy hat covering half his face. John let out a breath he hadn't realized he was holding. It definitely couldn't be his Hickory, then.

"S'at so? My, that certainly sounds like some adventure. Glad t'hear y'all got everyone back safe and sound. I'd love to meet all of Branch's brothers," the country troll drawled, a low chuckle leaving him as he tipped his cowboy hat back to grin at Poppy. John's breath caught in his throat.

"Well, you're in luck! I happen to have two of them here with me right now," Poppy enthused, turning with a flourish to gesture at the approaching duo. "The one with the magenta hair is Floyd, the one who was captured first and started our whole adventure, and the other is-"

"John Dory," Hickory breathed, his eyes widening as they landed on John, the smile slipping from his lips.

"Oh! How do you two know each other?" Poppy asked, tilting her head slightly as she looked between the two, a curious smile on her face. Floyd glanced between them and shifted closer to his brother, as if he could tell that John was having a bit of an internal panic.

"That's a-uhm…a bit of a long story," John finally chuckled, his smile crooked as he spoke, "Probably, what? A couple of decades in the making?"

Hickory visibly swallowed, letting out an awkward sounding laugh, "Somethin' like that, I s'pose."

"So, you got yourself a county accent, huh? Did you finally find what you were looking for in Lonesome Flats?" John asked, the tension in his chest loosening slightly. At least it was nice to know Hickory hadn't died. And, sure, perhaps they hadn't parted on the best of terms, but he couldn't exactly blame Hickory for leaving the way he had.

"Mm, not exactly," Hickory shrugged, tugging at his vest. "but I s'pose sort of somethin' to that effect. I mean…M'not a bounty hunter anymore, if that's what yer askin'."

John nodded slightly, taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly. It was like the tension slowly bled from his body as his shoulders loosened and a genuine smile curled his lips. He'd always worried that if he ever saw Hickory again that he would either be filled with dread, anger or unending sadness. But, in reality, he just felt a wave of relief that the other was okay and seemed to be doing well. "I'm…I'm really happy to see you, Hick."

The country troll blinked, surprise blatant on his face at John Dory's confession. Poppy rocked on her heels as the two older trolls looked at each other, obviously lost in their own little world. Floyd shuffled closer to her, biting at his lower lip as he watched the cavalcade of emotions wash over his brothers face.

"Uh, well," Poppy coughed, breaking the moment and causing all eyes to land on her, "It was super nice to see you Hickory. I heard the caravan will be in town for, like, a week? We'll catch up later! We're gonna have a big party to welcome you guys tomorrow, so I'll see you then! Right now we were actually just heading to grab breakfast before going over to the community center." She gestured over her shoulder towards the other side of town.

"Oh. Alright then, miss Poppy. I'll see you tomorrow," Hickory said, his charming smile coming back as he swept his hat off to bow slightly to the Queen of Pop. Poppy simply giggled and waved a hand at him as she rolled her eyes. Floyd wrinkled his nose at the gestured, still not quite sure how he felt about this troll from his brothers past.

"It was nice to see you, Hickory," John began, taking a step to follow Poppy and Floyd, before the pink troll shoved him back to where he'd been standing, a grin on her face.

"No, no! You two obviously haven't seen each other in a while! You should stay here and catch up," Poppy chirped, patting John on the shoulder before spinning away from him. "The kids'll understand if we postpone for a few days. Plus! I'm sure most of them will want to come see what the traders brought from Lonesome Flats. They'll probably be too distracted to pay much attention to anything else." She flashed John a grin over her shoulder as she manhandled Floyd into walking next to her, the magenta haired troll squawking indignantly as he was all but pushed away. "We'll go let them know, and we'll see you later! Enjoy yourselves!" She waved at them as she hustled Floyd away.

"Poppy!" Floyd grunted, trying and failing to dig his heels in as the Queen pushed him along. "What're you doing?! John looked so upset when he saw that troll! I can't just leave him like that!"

"We're not going to leave them."

"What? But you just said-"

"Yes. We're going to go to the community center to tell the kids that we're postponing the class, but then we're going back to spy on those two. You think I'm not also curious about how they reacted to each other?! For all that is trolly, Floyd, it looked like Hickory was about to faint when he saw John Dory. I need to know what that's all about."

Floyd let out a breathy laugh as he began walking on his own at Poppy's admission of curiosity and concern. He should've known better than to question her.

~

Meanwhile, John was staring after the two of them somewhat forlornly. Sure, he was happy to see Hickory, but being suddenly left alone with him? This was, perhaps, a bit much for his heart to handle at the moment.

"Uhh," John said unhelpfully as he turned back to Hickory, who looked equally as confused and unsettled as John felt. "Should we…go get breakfast?"

Hickory blinked at him before an easy grin split his face and he settled his cowboy hat back on his head and swept his arm out towards the market at large. "After you."

John snorted and rolled his eyes before gesturing for Hickory to follow him through the bustling market. He lead them to the opposite end of the market, where there were fewer trolls roaming around, and no caravan tents set up. There, a small bakery stand sat, where John ordered a couple of muffins and some coffee for the two of them.

"Thanks," Hickory hummed as the two of them sat at a small table off to the side of the stand, pulling his hat off and setting it to the side before picking up his coffee cup to inhale the aroma.

"No problem," John said with a shrug, picking at the muffin he had sat in front of himself. "So, uh…Lonesome Flats, huh? What made you settle down there?"

"Just gettin' right to it, huh?" Hickory chuckled, glancing up at John through his eye lashes. "It's a bit of a long story, though I s'pose we've got time t'spare. Also, just to clear one thing up right quick, I've lived there for 'bout a year, but can't really say I'm much settled there."

"But you're settled enough to have picked up their accent?" John prodded, Hickory wincing slightly at the comment.

"You know that's just part of blending in, mein freund," Hickory sighed, slipping into his natural accent easily.

"Ah, there it is," John snorted derisively, shaking his head as he popped a bit of muffin into his mouth, "who're you going after this time? Better be a real scum bag or I'm going to have to tell Poppy what you're up to."

"I already told you, I'm not a bounty hunter anymore," Hickory stated, shaking his head slightly, his ears lowering slightly as he watched John pick at his muffin. "Poppy and Branch helped me get out of that life. I don't think even Dickory is doing it anymore."

John paused in the destruction of his breakfast, looking up at Hickory with a light frown. "But your brother-"

"Said it was the only thing the two of us were good for. Ja, I know," Hickory shrugged, blowing hair out of his face. "But after the whole Rock Apocalypse thing, I just-" Hickory cut himself off as he took a deep breath and glanced up at the trees and sky above them. "Queen Poppy was the bounty. We were meant to bring her and the pop string to Queen Barb, in order to secure a safe place for the yodelers to keep their music. Dickory and I established ourselves in Lonesome Flats and spread a story about getting lost in an avalanche in the mountains so that no one would look for us. But, when we finally found Poppy and Branch…She was different from what I expected." He turned his gaze back to John Dory and smiled warmly. "We grew up hearing all these horror stories about Pop trolls stealing everyone's music, du weisst? But all she wanted to do was help everyone live in harmony. She wanted everyone to be able to enjoy each others music. And I- Well, it reminded me of you. And how, when we were younger, you said you wanted to travel and experience everything you possibly could. I wanted that. I wanted that for everyone. Not just the yodelers." He rolled his shoulders and took a sip of his coffee, his voice shifting back into the country drawl John had heard when they'd first come across Hickory in the market, "So, I tried to help miss Poppy get away from Barb with the Pop string. But Dickory-" he rolled his eyes and glared off to the side, "He blew our cover."

John sat enraptured by Hickory's story, unconsciously resting his cheek in the palm of his hand and leaning forward. He blinked as Hickory paused, wrinkling his nose. "How'd he blow your cover?"

Hickory's cheeks suddenly grew dark as he ducked his head and let out a nervous chuckle. "Well, y'know, country trolls usually have four legs? And my brother and I, we most defintely don't?"

John frowned, sitting back in his chair. "Yeah? What does that have to do with-" he froze, a slow realization dawning on his face, before he let out a sudden bark of laughter. "Oh my troll! Did you two make a freaking costume?!"

Hickory hummed abashedly and rubbed at his neck. "Yessir. Dickory may have been the back end o' the horse," he muttered as he cringed, grinning crookedly at John, "he heard me tryin' to warn Poppy to run and, well, he ripped the costume apart."

John couldn't stop the peels of laughter that left him at the mental image of Dickory angrily ripping himself out of the back end of a pair of pants, slapping the table and nearly knocking their coffees over. "Hooooboy, that is PRICELSS!" He hiccupped as his laughter subsided after a moment, wiping at his watery eyes. "He must've been so pissed at you."

"Bit of an understatement, I'm afraid," Hickory shrugged, "After miss Poppy saved everyone, I pretty much told Dickory off an' moved to Lonesome Flats."

"And he just let you go?"

"I threatened to sick Poppy on 'im if he tried to pull me back into huntin'. She knows about it, too, so if I suddenly disappear from Lonesome Flats or she gets wind that somethin' happened to me, she promised to come find me. She's sweet like that."

John nodded, an easy smile on his face. "Yeah, she is. I'm really glad Branch has her in his life."

"I'm still tryin' to wrap my head around the fact that he's your brother! You talked about your brothers a bit, but what a small world we seem to live in," Hickory chuckled. "I'm also kinda surprised you even wanted to talk t'me, if I'm bein' honest."

John blinked at the sudden shift in tone from the other, leaning back in his seat a bit and wrapping his fingers around his coffee cup. "Well," he sighed, "I wont' lie. I used to imagine running into you a lot, after you first left. At first I was really upset, then I just became angry." He scowled down at his coffee. "I imagined so many different scenarios. In most of them I told you off for everything. Sometimes I did something nasty to get back at you. But, when I finally saw you…" He lifted his gaze, his frown slipping into an easy smile, "I was just happy to see that you were alive and seemed to be doing well. I guess that old saying that time heals all wounds really is true."

Hickory stared at John for a minute, his breath catching in his throat. "I'm so sorry, Johnny…"

"Please," John rocked back in his chair, turning away with a rueful grin, while waving a hand through the air, "I don't think I ever really blamed you for leaving. You were young - we both were. And I'm not exactly-" he gestured vaguely at himself, "y'know."

Hickory shook his head adamantly at John Dory, sitting forward to slide his hand across the table and rest it over John's. "Don't ever say that about yerself, darlin'," Hickory crooned, gently squeezing John's fingers, "You are so much more than you give yerself credit for."

John Dory blinked at Hickory, a flush quickly spreading across his face the longer he stared at the other. He cleared his throat after a moment, pulling his hand away from Hickory to cover one of his flaming cheeks, while an embarrassed trill of a laugh escaped him. "Don't say stuff like that, Hick," he said through a strained chuckle, "You're gonna give me ideas.

A grin settled on Hickory's face at John's reaction to his touch, taking the opportunity of the other looking in the opposite direction to slide his chair around the table to sit closer to John. "Oh, yeah? What kinda ideas, darlin'?"

John all but squeaked when he realized how much closer Hickory had gotten to him, his cheeks growing impossibly brighter as he whipped his head around to stare wide eyed at the bounty hunter turned cowboy.

~

Meanwhile, Poppy and Floyd had returned from their quick trip to the community center, and were both currently crouched inconspicuously behind a bush to watch the two having breakfast.

"I can't hear what they're saying," Poppy whined under her breath, shifting to try and get a better view of the two.

"If we get any closer they'll know we're here," Floyd sighed, shifting to settle more comfortably on his knees. "John has ridiculous hearing, and if Hickory really used to be a bounty hunter, then I can only imagine how quickly he'd be able to tell he was being spied on."

"Yeah, but," Poppy flopped back down next to Floyd, a pout on her lips, "I really want to know what Hickory said to make John Dory blush like that."

"John Dory is blushing?!" Floyd quickly sat up, shoving a branch out of his way to get a better look at the table. He gasped quietly at seeing how bashful his brother looked as Hickory got close to him, his eyes wide at the sight. Even wracking his brain for every memory he had of John, he couldn't think of a time he'd ever seen his brother look so ruffled. That was certainly something. "I don't think I've ever seen John look so…bashful."

"I know! Isn't it cute?!" Poppy squealed quietly at Floyd, grabbing at his shoulder in her enthusiasm. "Wouldn't they be SUCH a cute couple?! Awww," she sighed, letting Floyd go to cup her own cheeks, "They have history, and they look like they get along so well! Ahhhh! We HAVE to get them together!" By the end of her rant Poppy was practically rasping to keep herself from shouting about the couple sat across from them.

Floyd had his doubts, however, about how the two would do as a couple. Especially after the anxiety he could feel radiate off of John Dory when they'd first come across Hickory at the market. "I mean, Hickory definitely knows how to push John's buttons. I don't know if that's necessarily a good thing yet or not."

"What do you mean?"

The two sat back, letting the bush block their view for the time being.

"Well…John tensed up pretty badly when he first saw Hickory. Maybe their history is more complicated than we can appreciate right now. I mean, they do look like they're getting along right now, I can't argue that. But, who knows how long that will last. John's never really been one to give up the reins on a situation, if you forgive the pun. Hickory seems like he might have a bit of a big personality, from what I've seen so far, and I can't imagine that will mesh well with John's, uhm…exuberant tendencies."

Poppy frowned lightly at Floyd, tapping at her chin thoughtfully. "Hmmm…maybe you're right. I guess we should probably just keep an eye on them for now. So we can at least be there if something happens between them. Be it bad," she wiggled her eyebrows at Floyd who let out a fond sigh of exasperation at her, "or good!"

When the two looked back out from behind the bush they both panicked slightly at finding the table where John and Hickory had been abandoned.

"Where'd they go?!"

~

"Sooo," John drew the word out as he and Hickory wandered through the crowded market place, snapping his fingers and slapping his hands together absently, "What've you been up to since moving to Lonesome Flats?"

Hickory chuckled at John's fidgeting, deciding to take a chance and catch one of John's swinging hands in one of his own. "Well, first I had t'make it up to miss Delta and the other country trolls for trickin' them. But, they were real nice about everythin', after I told 'em about Dickory and how I'd grown up. Got myself a nice little house, and a job workin' at one o' the shops there. Shortly after that, I heard about Poppy startin' talks with all of the troll leaders to work on this idea of a cross kingdom trade route. A way for all different kinds of trolls to experience each others cultures and music. Anyone who wanted to volunteer could represent their home kingdom and travel around. Took a bit a doin', so I think our group's only been at it for a few months? We've gone through Vibe City and Volcano Rock City so far. Pop Village is stop number three." He wiggled three fingers in the air to show the number of stops, grinning as he noted that John's hand was still firmly in his own without any signs of pulling away.

"You finally got your wish to travel wherever you wanted, huh?" John asked, a soft smile on his face. "I'm glad to hear it, Hick. After Pop village, where's your next stop?"

Hickory shrugged, dipping his head slightly to watch their hands as he gently began to swing them back and forth. "I think the caravan is headed up to Symphonyville next. Dunno if I'm really interested in headin' into the mountains, though, if I'm bein' honest." John gave his hand a little squeeze, causing Hickory to glance up at the other troll shyly. "I might be tempted t'stay in Pop Village for an extended amount of time."

John cleared his throat as he noticed the look on Hickory's face, finally pulling his hand away to tuck it into the pocket of his vest. Hickory's face fell as John hunched his shoulders slightly, but he accepted the reaction and tucked his own thumbs under his belt. He couldn't expect John to forgive him completely so soon.

"Well, y'know, there's plenty of room here, if you did want to stay," John finally said after a minute or two of silence between the two, shrugging his shoulders nonchalantly. "Rhonda and I stay just outside the village, near Branch's bunker. There's loads of room out there to expand living areas."

"Rhonda?" Hickory asked, his steps faltering slightly at hearing the name. Did John have a girlfriend? He shifted so they were walking a little further apart, now feeling a bit like an ass for his blatant flirting.

"Yeah! My armadillo bus," John said, his face lighting up as he spoke, grinning widely at Hickory, "I found her not too long after we split up, when I went back to the Neverglade trail. She's super smart, and really sweet. You wanna meet her?"

Hickory let out a breath, a sudden wave of relief washing over him at the knowledge that he hadn't been blatantly stepping on anyone's toes. "Yeah, 'course," he hummed, trotting along next to John as they headed towards the edge of town.

"She's a licker, I'll give you that much warning," John laughed, more bounce in his step as they moved away from the crowds, "She's also been known to try and eat people when she first meets them, but don't worry too much about that. I'm sure she won't try to eat you if you're with me."

A slightly nervous chuckle escaped Hickory as he followed John, starting to wonder if him meeting the bus critter was really that great of an idea. "If you say so, darlin'."

"I do say so," John chirped, snapping his goggles a little to emphasize his point. Hickory snorted quietly at the gesture, endlessly pleased that John had yet to call him out on using the endearment on him yet.

"Here she is!" John crowded loudly as the two stepped into a clearing, the large armadillo bus jumping up excitedly at seeing John. She wagged her tail, causing her whole back end to swing as she bound forward, smacking her entire face into John's chest, causing the troll to loose his breath and stumble backwards with a laugh. "Down girl," he wheezed, patting her face before her attention was caught on Hickory.

The ex bounty hunter froze as she stared him down, her tail freezing as her gaze bore into him. He swallowed thickly, shifting slightly to get ready to run, before Rhonda let out a sudden rumbling roar of a sound and licked Hickory. He gasped as he stumbled back, his hat going flying, as he found himself absolutely coated in glittery slobber.

"Awww, she likes you!" John laughed, patting Rhonda on the side as she purred and flopped herself down next to him.

"Yay?" Hickory shook the slobber off his arms, before wiping at his face, letting out little sounds of disgust as he did so. "I s'pose it's just a good thing she didn't try t'eat me," he all but grumbled, turning to look for where his hat had landed.

"Well, that might still happen. Rhonda's unpredictable like that," John chuckled, making a quick kissy face at the armadillo bus who cooed back at him, before looking back to Hickory. "You wanna shower that off?"

Hickory paused at the offer, blinking in surprise. "You comin' onto me, Johnny?" he teased, winking playfully at John. He knew he must look an absolute sight right now, but the mild flirt still managed to get John's cheeks flaming.

"No! I'm just offering you my shower," John scoffed, rolling his eyes as he rubbed at one of his warm cheeks. "C'mon, you. Rhonda's got a shower inside." He waved for Hickory to follow as he opened Rhonda's door and hopped inside.

~

"They could be anywhere! Poppy, please. Let's take a break," Floyd huffed, doing his best to keep up with the Queen of Pop, but his energy was quickly flagging. He stopped in the middle of a path in the market, doing his best to catch his breath.

Poppy glanced back at Floyd, suddenly feeling terrible for running the poor troll practically ragged as they ran around the market trying to find where John Dory and Hickory had gone. "Sorry, Floyd," she sighed, moving to support him as they shuffled over to a bench so they could sit down. "I just- well, you said so yourself. Something could go wrong while they're together."

"Hey now, I didn't say something might go wrong. I just think it'd be best to keep an eye on them in case John gets overwhelmed, or he starts a fight," Floyd muttered, stretching his legs out in front of himself as they sat down.

"Exactly. In case something goes wrong," Poppy said as she flopped herself down next to Floyd.

They both jerked slightly when they heard the tell tale sound of Rhonda roaring.

"Ah," Floyd laughed, nodding in the direction of Rhonda's clearing, "There they are."

~

John hovered outside the door of his small bathroom, wringing the towel he'd dug out between his hands. He could hear Hickory humming to himself in the shower and it sent a thrill down his spine. Maybe this time could be different? He jumped as he heard the water turn off, quickly hooking the towel onto the doorknob and stepping away. "Towel's on the knob for you!" he called through the door before moving to the couch in the larger portion of his living space.

"Thank you kindly, darlin'," Hickory called from the bathroom, the door opening ever so slightly as the country troll pulled the towel inside.

John flushed at the endearment. It's not like he hadn't noticed Hickory using it, it was just…well, it was nice to have someone be immediately kind to him upon reuniting. Perhaps the whole adventure with his brothers and their sour reunions were still lingering on his heart and mind. Just a little.

"That's better," Hickory sighed as he stepped out of the bathroom, pulling John from his thoughts. The towel was draped around his shoulders to catch the water dripping from his hair. Even damp the ends still curled up to defy the pull of gravity. "Nothin' against yer bus, but I'm not the biggest fan o' glitter. It gets in places it really shouldn't be," he said with a light laugh and a shudder, which caused John to startle into laughing as well.

"Yeah. Sorry not sorry," John snorted, waving for Hickory to sit next to him on the couch.

Once Hickory sat the two stewed in silence for a minute. John stared off at the board of Brozone pictures Branch had put together that he hadn't yet had the heart to dismantle, while Hickory fidgeted with his fingers.

"I missed you," Hickory finally breathed, breaking the silence and swallowing thickly after the admission.

John blinked, turning to face Hickory with a genuine look of surprise on his face.

"What? How's that surprisin'?" Hickory asked, a crooked smirk on his lips.

"If you knew my track record, it really wouldn't be so surprising that I'm surprised," John snorted derisively, shrugging his shoulders. "I don't know if you remember, but I broke up my brothers band before I started traveling. We did not part ways on good terms. And none of them were exactly pleased to see me when we met up again."

"A'course I remember," Hickory murmured, shifting so he was sat a bit closer to John, their thighs touching, "I'm sorry to hear that you didn't have the best a' reunions with 'em. But, from what Poppy told me, and the fact that yer still here, I assume thing's've gotten a bit better? Weren't you with one o' yer brothers when we met at the market?"

"Yeah. That was Floyd. He's the only one who didn't really seem to hold a grudge over everything. But, he's also sort of dependent on me and Branch right now, still. He got hurt pretty bad when he was captured. So, y'know, I don't really know if that's actual forgiveness, or just playing nice while he needs help," John said with a self depreciating laugh. He shrugged, turning a wobbly smile on Hickory, "So, yeah. It's a bit surprising that someone who walked out on me would miss me."

Hickory shifted back as if he'd been hit, biting his lip as he looked to his knees. "You know why I had t'leave, John," he breathed, twisting his fingers into the damp towel around his neck.

"Yeah. Still doesn't change the fact that it hurt."

Hickory nodded, letting out a breath. "Can we…can we try to start again? Believe it or not, Johnny, but ya mean a whole lot t'me. I'd really like it if we could-" he cut himself off with a startled gasp as arms suddenly wrapped around him, squeezing him in a hug.

"Of course," John breathed into Hickory's hair, "I missed you, too. Of course we can start over."

A warm smile bloomed on Hickory's face as he turned to nudge his nose against John's temple, chuckling quietly at the odd angle the other had pulled him into a hug at. "Thank you," he murmured, lifting an arm to awkwardly half return the hug, since the other was currently pinned to his side.

~

"Well, there's Rhonda," Floyd sighed, frowning as he looked around the clearing, where there was no sign of John or Hickory.

Poppy huffed, frowning as she skipped a little ahead of Floyd to peer around the clearing, but doing her best not to alert Rhonda of their presence. She had seemingly fallen asleep since they'd heard her roar. "Where did they go now," Poppy whined, tossing her head and arms back in exasperation.

"I don't-oh!" Floyd began, before grabbing Poppy and dragging her into some tall grass as Rhonda's door swung open. They watched as John hopped down from the bus critter, holding his hand up to take Hickory's as he descended from the bus as well. They seemed to be in a quiet conversation, smiling and laughing as they exited the bus and began to walk down a trail that lead further into the forest.

"C'mon!" Poppy chirped, her energy renewed as she tugged Floyd along by his wrist.

~

"Yeah, so after we rescued Floyd, I decided to stick around Pop Village. As much as I love traveling, getting to know my brothers is also pretty important to me. I missed out on so much, y'know?"

Hickory nodded as he listened to John, a fond little smile on his face as they meandered down the forest trail. He'd truly missed getting to hear John Dory's stories. Well, just him talking in general, really. He knew John liked to talk, but he liked it even better when someone genuinely listened to him, and that was probably one of Hickory's favorite things to do.

"So, you think yer gonna settle down here in Pop Village? Or just stay until Floyd can get along without a cane?"

John clicked his tongue and shrugged as he climbed up onto a fallen branch. He held his arms out as he began to walk along it like a tight rope, wobbling a little as it rocked slightly beneath his feet.

"Depends on how long it takes for Branch to get sick of me, I guess," he said with a derisive little laugh, causing Hickory to frown.

"What'd I say about talkin' about yerself like that?" Hickory scolded, shoving the branch slightly to make John stumble and catch himself.

"Hey!" John clung to a small twig as the base of the branch wobbled beneath his feet. "Trying to kill me?!"

"No. Just tryin' to redirect your stupid self depreciatin' bullshit," Hickory said with a thin grin. "Yer brothers love you."

"You say that-"

"I do!" Hickory cut him off, shoving the branch again, causing John to cuss him out as he stumbled to catch himself again. "I still love Dickory, even though he dragged me over hells half acre to hunt down trolls for plenty of not so savory folks. I still love 'im, even though if I were t'see his stupid face any time soon I'd punch him in the teeth! Yer brothers love you, Johnny, and they're probably more than happy to have you around, whether ya want t'believe it or not."

John snorted above him, but relented. "I guess you've got a point," he muttered, laughing as Hickory responded with a quiet, "a'course I do." He shook his head slightly, rolling his eyes with a grin and most certainly not paying attention to his feet and where he was walking. Because, if he had, then he would've noticed the patch of lichen growing on the fallen branch. He gasped as his foot slipped, nothing nearby for him to grab onto to keep himself from falling. He braced for the impact of the ground, but was pleasantly surprised when instead he hit something soft and a quiet 'oof' was breathed into his ear.

"Careful there, darlin'," Hickory hummed, grinning down at John as the other turned his head to peer up at his rescuer, "ya gotta watch where yer goin' if yer gonna be climbin' on things." He chuckled as John's face flushed, tipping his head forward a bit to properly get into the teal trolls space. "You alright?"

"Fine," John all but squeaked. He took a breath and cleared his throat at hearing how high his voice had gone. "Fine. I'm fine," he huffed, purposefully lowering his voice an octave, and pulling away from Hickory to tug at his vest and fix his askew goggles. "Let's, uhm, go this way," he added quickly, spinning on his heel to point down another trail, "I think the star gazing club has a meeting place up on a hill with a nice view over Pop Village."

Hickory followed with a self satisfied smirk on his lips, his thumbs hooked into the belt loops on his pants. "Whatever ya say, Johnny."

~

"Did you see that?!" Poppy quietly squealed, shaking Floyd's shoulder in her enthusiasm.

"I did," Floyd hummed, letting the over enthusiastic queen shake him. However, he really couldn't return the excitement she exuded for the two they were following. True enough that John seemed more than happy to be around Hickory, but he couldn't shake the strange feeling of dread in the pit of his stomach every time they had a "cute" interaction.

"Oh my gosh! Maybe we were both worried about nothing," Poppy sighed, stars practically in her eyes as she watched John and Hickory walk away, "Maybe we should let them finish their date in peace." She stood and brushed her skirt off, offering a hand to Floyd.

Floyd took Poppy's hand and help in standing back up, but shook his head at her suggestion to stop following them. "No. No, I don't think that's a good idea yet."

Poppy tilted her head, a frown on her face. "What? Why not?"

Floyd sighed, brushing hair out of his face as he watched his brother disappear up a trail. "I just have this awful feeling in my gut," he admitted, his shoulders drooping, "I don't know why. John looks happy, and they haven't had any sort of interaction that we've seen that should make me think something bad might happen. I just…" He waved a hand vaguely through the air, "I don't know. I'm worried about him."

Poppy stared at Floyd for a minute, as if she was trying to see through him. He swallowed thickly and shifted on his feet, a bit worried that she would call him over protective and silly for his trepidation. But, he was pleasantly surprised when instead a large smile bloomed across her face and she took his hand and squeezed it lightly. "You're a good brother," she stated, before turning to follow John and Hickory again.

~

"Here we are!" John announced unnecessarily as the duo reached a tall hill at the end of the trail.

"S'quite the hill," Hickory laughed as John rolled his eyes.

"It's not the hill that's impressive. It's the view," John retorted, sticking his tongue out at Hickory, even as he grabbed the other trolls hand to tug him along. "C'mon! It's actually kinda impressive."

It was finally Hickory's turn to flush as John tugged him along, a slow grin making its way across his face as the two trudged up the hill.

Upon cresting the hill a spectacular view of Pop Village was exposed. Pods of every size, shape and color hung from the trees, while below you could see the hustle and bustle of the market, where trolls were going about their daily lives. There was a class learning how to manouver flyer bugs zipping around the walkways in the trees, while a heard of puffalo were grazing just outside the edge of the market.

"My," Hickory breathed, before letting out a low whistle, "That is quite the view, isn't it?"

"Yeah," John hummed, before suddenly flopping down in the grass next to Hickory, leaning back on his hands to watch the hustle and bustle of the community below. "I'm kinda surprised more trolls don't come up here for the view? But I guess most pop trolls are more interested in fun, games and parties than sitting quietly."

Hickory settled himself in the grass next to John, while setting his hat to the side. "Never been one to really stick to the mold, have ya, Johnny?"

John tilted his head to smirk at Hickory, shifting to nudge their shoulders together. "Nah. The mold is boring. Plus, I think all those years spent by myself sort of made me forget exactly how energetic pop trolls can be. It can get to be a bit…much."

"What do y'mean, by yerself? Ya never picked up a travelling companion? You always talked about all o' the things you wanted the two of us to do when we were together."

John sighed quietly and shifted so he could tip his head and rest his cheek against Hickory's shoulder. "Nope," he popped the 'p', watching a flyer bug and its rider do a flip in the air, "Between hiking the Neverglade trail, where there really wasn't anyone around, raising Rhonda and moving around so much? Anyone I did meet didn't really want to stay with me very long. Or it just didn't feel right, y'know?"

"Yeah, I know."

With a light frown John tipped his head back a little to try and get a look at Hickory's face, but only really managed to shove his nose into the country trolls cheek. It pulled a chuckle from Hickory, but wasn't really what John was going for. He sat up and leaned forward, catching Hickory's eye. "You didn't find someone out there for you?"

"When?!" Hickory laughed, this time it was his turn to sound sarcastic and self depreciating, "When I was bein' dragged from town to town with no set timeline for when we came or went? Or when I was workin' on a hunt with my brother?" He ran his fingers through his hair, leaving it sticking up at odd angles. "Plus, like you said," he shrugged, "Nothin' felt right."

"I'm sorry."

Hickory wrinkled his nose, turning a bemused smile on John. "What're you sorry for? S'not like you were the one forcing me t'live the life I did. Plus, isn't it some sorta unwritten rule that y'should be happy when ya hear yer ex has been miserable without ya?"

"That'd be a stupid rule," John stated flippantly, "You're not happy I was upset after you left, are you?"

"Course not."

"Then why would I be happy that you were unhappy? I might've been upset for a while, but I only ever wanted you to be happy."

Hickory felt his heart flutter in his chest at John's words, while letting out a slow breath. "Y'mean that?"

"Duh," John snorted, moving his hand to entwine their fingers together, a soft smile on his face. "You were one of the best friends I've ever had, Hick."

"John," Hickory breathed, shifting so he was more fully facing John Dory, "You were mine, too. I thought about ya, so much, when I was out runnin' the roads with Dickory. You have no idea."

John hummed, squeezing Hickory's hand. "I thought about you, too."

Without much warning, Hickory lifted his free hand to cup John's cheek, causing the teal troll to freeze up, a startled look on his face. "Hickory…?"

Hickory didn't answer, simply letting out a soft hum as he leaned forward and pressed his lips to John's while letting his eyes slip shut. He was completely unaware of the somewhat panicked, wide eyed expression on John's face as the county troll pressed close.

"Wanted to do that for a while," Hickory offered as he broke their kiss a moment later while pressing his forehead to John's, eyes still closed. He let out a breathy little laugh as he nudged their noses together, while John could feel his panic slowly begin to ebb away, even as his heart thundered in his chest. "Seein' you in the market today felt like my whole world came crashin' down around my ears, while also finally feelin' like it was all coming back together." He let out a low chuckle, brushing his fingers down from John Dory's cheek to push under John's vest and rest against his shoulder, relishing in the little shiver he could feel as his fingers moved. "The time we spent together, all those years ago, it meant the world to me, Johnny. I want ya to know that." He swept his thumb in little circles against John's shoulder, finally opening his eyes and leaning back a little to take in the flush and startled expression still on John Dory's face. "Thinkin' 'bout you, an' the courage you had to explore the world on yer own when you were still so young. It really helped me through some hard times."

John swallowed thickly, feeling like his skin was on fire while his heart was ready to beat right out of his chest. He was pretty sure his brain was flat lining at this point, as the only thing he managed to say in return was a breathy, "Hickory," before leaning forward to press his own lips to Hickory's. He untangled their fingers so he could cup both of his hands against Hickory's cheeks and pull him in close. That caused the country troll to loose balance slightly and push John a bit, which resulted in John falling back into the grass with a soft 'oof', his breathing quick and vest dislodged from his shoulder.

"Well," Hickory hummed, leaning over John with a grin, his own cheeks flushed dark, "Ain't you a pretty picture?" He trailed his fingers down from John's shoulder, tapping lightly at the flush that had traveled from the teal trolls cheeks to his chest. He then leaned down to kiss John again, pressing the other into the grass.

For a solid minute John was in bliss. It felt like no time at all had passed between them as Hickory's hands explored his fur unbidden and he had the life kissed out of him. He lifted his own hands to comb through Hickory's bright orange locks, pulling slightly as he maneuvered Hickory's face to kiss him more deeply.

~

"I don't need to see this," Floyd groaned, covering his eyes and crouching further behind the tree he and Poppy were hiding behind.

"Shhh!" Poppy waved at him absently, leaning around the tree and letting out a happy little noise as she watched John fall back into the grass.

~

But then reality had to come crashing down around his ears. He had obligations to his brothers. Hickory would be moving on with the caravan in a few days to head into the mountains. He was only just finally getting settled in Pop Village, would a fling with an old flame really be in his best interest? Not to mention, when Hickory had left him before, he's said…He suddenly pushed Hickory away by the shoulders, sucking in a sharp breath even as Hickory let out a confused whine.

"I can't do this."

"Wh-what?" Hickory sat back on his heels, a mix of confusion and hurt on his face.

"I can't let myself fall into old habits," John stated as he sat up, fixing his vest and settling it properly over his shoulders, before pulling his goggles down over his eyes. Hickory could feel his heart plummet at that. He knew perfectly well John's goggles were like a physical wall he could put up between himself and others. "I can't get involved in a fling right now. I've got too much going on." John stood, brushing dirt from his clothes, "And, quite frankly, I'm just too old to be playing games like this anymore."

"Games?!" Hickory shook his head, reaching out towards John, who stepped back out of his reach. "I'm not playin' games!"

"We had fun, yeah?" John stated, a strained smile on his face, "This was fun. Like old times, yeah? Nothing serious, just a bit of fun." John could feel his breaths becoming short and knew he had to leave before he started crying. "I'll see you around, Hick," he said, nodding towards the ex bounty hunter, before hurrying back down the hill.

Hickory stared at the spot John had stood, his breath caught in his throat even as tears welled in his eyes. He knew this was his own fault, but it didn't stop his heart from shattering in his chest.

~

"What just happened?!" Poppy gasped as she watched John practically run down the hill, only to turn and find Floyd already moving as quickly as he could in the direction John had gone.

~

"John!" Floyd shouted once they were a decent distance from the hill. He knew he'd never be able to catch up to John at the pace he could currently go, but wanted to catch him before they got too close to town, where he knew John would put all of his walls back up. His older brother stopped and turned, and Floyd could see tear tracks on his brothers cheeks below his blatantly fogged up goggles.

"H-hey, Floyd," John stuttered, sucking in a breath and obviously trying to compose himself as quickly as possible as Floyd approached, "What're you doing out here? I figured you'd be off with Poppy planning tomorrow's party."

"John Dory," Floyd murmured, dropping his cane so he could reach up and pull John's goggles away from his face and back up into his hair. The reveal caused John's face to crumple, a wretched sob escaping him as Floyd tugged him into a hug. "Shhh. It's okay. I've got you."

John wept as the two shifted to kneel in the middle of the trail, John clinging to Floyd like his life depended on it while Floyd rubbed soothing circles against his back.

~

"Hickory," Poppy said softly as she approached the country troll as he continued to stare into space, silent tears running down his cheeks.

"Wha-oh! Miss Poppy," Hickory gasped, quickly wiping at his face and plastering a smile on as the queen sat in the grass next to him. "What're you doin' out here?"

"Floyd and I were following you guys," Poppy admitted, "We were worried something might happen between you and John Dory. I saw what just happened. Or, well, the gist of it. Did you and John get into a fight?"

Hickory let his smile slip away as he shook his head. "Not exactly, no…"

~

"Do you want to tell me what happened?" Floyd asked after a few long minutes of John crying into his shoulder. The elder sat back to wipe at his face, murmuring a quiet "thanks" as Floyd handed him a handkerchief.

"Do you have time for a stupid story?" John Dory asked, his voice thick from crying.

"Hey now, with a reaction like the one you just had, I'm pretty sure the story isn't stupid," Floyd scolded gently, rubbing at John's shoulder. "C'mon. You can talk to me."

John nodded after a moment, pulling himself to his feet and offering a hand to Floyd. "Okay. But, let's get back to Rhonda. I don't feel like airing my dirty laundry out where anyone could come along and eavesdrop."

"I feel like that's a dig for obviously spying on you."

"That's because it is."

Floyd snorted, glad that his brother at least wasn't so upset that he couldn't still dish out sarcastic remarks where necessary. He took John's help in getting to his feet and the two of them made their way back to Rhonda.

When they reached the bus critters clearing it was as if she could tell John was upset. Instead of the exuberant greeting she'd given him earlier in the day, she simply rumbled sadly at him and nudged him gently with her face.

"Hey hey, baby girl," John cooed, rubbing at her face, "I'll be okay."

Once the two were inside, Floyd forced John to sit at the little table he had for meals, while he dug around in John's cupboards for the tea he knew his brother had picked up some time ago for when Floyd came by for a visit.

"Here we go," Floyd hummed as he finally set two mugs of tea on the table, settling himself across from John Dory, who had been staring at the table, obviously lost in his own thoughts. "You ready to talk to me?"

John sucked in a breath as if coming up from under water. He blinked rapidly at Floyd for a second, before offering a small nod and pulling his tea mug close to himself. "Yeah…Sorry, yeah. It's just-well, the story starts when I was in my late twenties. Maybe twenty-six? Twenty-seven? Something like that. I'd been traveling around for a while, already, but it was before I'd met Rhonda. I was hiking through he mountains, trying to find this little village I'd come across once before when I'd first started traveling, when I was eighteen or nineteen. It had been a really sweet little town, with a population of yodeling trolls. Since it'd been one of my first stops, I didn't really want to stay very long at the time, but as I got older I sort of regretted not sticking around. It'd been the only place I'd ever met yodelers. It was a really unique, niche genre and I wanted to go back." He let out a breath and blew on his tea, lifting it but not taking a sip. "And eventually, I did find it. It was sort of tucked away, so I was running low on supplies and was completely exhausted. The trolls I was staying with had a teenager also staying with them. He was a real sweet kid who helped me get settled in and offered to show me around town when I was feeling up to it."

"Not sure how this is relevant to you breaking down in the forest, John," Floyd muttered, scrunching his nose a little.

"I'm getting to it, ya brat," John snorted, offering a small grin to his brother, before looking back to his tea, "Anyway…So, in the morning when I'm up and about, this kid comes bounding over to me with all of the energy in the world and offers to show me around again. I couldn't really refuse, especially since I was being stared down by the lady whose house I was staying in. So, we went around the town and had a pretty good time. I stayed in the village for a couple of months, and the kid stuck by my side nearly the entire time. When I was getting ready to leave he admitted to having a massive crush on me."

"Oh," Floyd blinked, tilting his head, "this still doesn't-"

"It was Hickory, Floyd," John stated bluntly, cutting his brother off and giving him an unimpressed look over his tea. He then took a loud slurp of his drink, which he knew drove Floyd insane.

"Alright, alright, I'll stop interrupting."

"Thank you. So, anyway, he confesses to me and I have to break it to him that, one, I was planning on leaving in the next few days, and two, he was too young for me. We were at different points in our lives, and it just wasn't going to work. He took the rejection relatively well, I think, but I didn't see him again until I was literally walking out of town. He stopped me at the edge of town, gave me the tightest hug I think I've ever gotten, told me to be safe, and that he hoped our paths would cross again one day."

"Your breakdown leads me to think your paths definitely met up again," Floyd interrupted once more, earning another tea slurp from John.

"Yes, they did. A few years later I was back up in the mountains. I'd planned on hanging out with the classical trolls for a while, but after a week or so I found myself getting pretty bored of Symphonyville. Nothing against the classical trolls, but it turns out it's just not my thing. So, I went trekking through the mountains to find the yodelers again. If nothing else, they knew how to throw a great party. Speaking of which, the trolls I'd managed to convince to let me borrow a room from that time were hosting a party the night after I'd shown up, and they invited me to go." He let out a little laugh, his gaze far away as he relived the memories, "It was a birthday party for one of the trolls in town. It was his twenty-first, and I guess for the yodelers that's a big deal. A kind of coming of age, uh, age."

John paused to glance up at Floyd, who gave him an encouraging little nod.

"So, I went. Turned out that it was Hickory's birthday, but I didn't run into him at the party until a few hours in. To make a long story that you don't want to hear short, he cornered me at the party, alluded to the fact that he wasn't too young for me anymore, and…well, y'know."

Floyd cringed, wrinkling his nose at John. "Thank you for sparing me the details."

"You're welcome," John snorted, sitting back in his chair while swirling the remains of his tea around in his cup. He let out a puff of air after a moment, downing the tea and smacking the cup onto the table, making Floyd wince. "I stayed in the village that time for well over a year. Hickory and I were happy. And I thought…Well, I thought things were going really well. I'd even started making plans to permanently move there. It was going to be a surprise for Hickory. I'd been looking to have a house built, and was talking to a couple of trolls about where the best spot in the village would be to build it. But then…then Hickory's brother came back to town."

Floyd reached across the table to take John's hand, which had begun to tremble around his tea cup.

"Dickory came back to town and it's like Hickory's entire personality completely changed. He suddenly barely had any time to spend with me, and when he did, he started acting aloof to me. I confronted him about it, and he apologized and told me that his brother just stressed him out. I took him at face value about that, and it was okay again for a couple of days. But, then he just ghosted me for almost a week. I had no idea where he was, and everyone in town either told me it wasn't something I should worry about and that he'd be back soon, or just brushed me off completely. When I was starting to panic, he just suddenly showed up again." He paused, squeezing Floyd's fingers gently as fresh tears welled in his eyes. "When he did show up, he told me I didn't need to worry about where he'd been. And then, he told me that he had to leave with his brother to work, and he didn't know if or when he'd be back. He…he told me that since I was a travelling pop troll I should have plenty of other places I could go, but that he'd had fun while I was in town. That he wanted to find something serious."

John couldn't keep the tears back as he hunched in on himself, barely registering the scraping sound of chair legs against the floor as Floyd got up from the table to pull him into a hug.

"I had though we were serious," John sobbed, hiccupping before confessing quietly, "I loved him, Floyd. So much."

"Oh, John," Floyd cooed, running his fingers through his brothers hair. "He's a bastard who never deserved you."

"N-no," John pushed Floyd away slightly, sniffing as he shook his head, "He was the sweetest troll I'd ever met, Floyd. You don't understand." He gently shifted Floyd to the side so he could stand up and move across the room to a cupboard. He opened the door and pulled a well worn scrap book out, shuffling back to the table to set it down. He gestured for Floyd to open it.

Inside there were pictures of a snowy landscape with quaint little wooden houses, decorated with flowery trim, and trolls Floyd could only assume were the yodelers. The first couple of pages were like this - general photos of what looked like the village John had described, before the photos shifted to a young John Dory with a handful of trolls Floyd didn't recognize, and then to nothing but photos of John and Hickory. Dozens of pages of the two of them looking absolutely smitten with each other, and Floyd was relatively certain it was the happiest he'd ever seen his brother.

Floyd frowned as he looked back up at John. "This doesn't change the fact that he essentially called you a whore before he left you."

"Yeah, I've thought about that a lot," John admitted, his tears having subsided into the occasional sniffle again. He sat back down in his chair. "He wasn't exactly wrong. I've travelled a lot. Before I met him, I'd had a few other short term partners. And after we broke up, I had a couple little flings. It wasn't hard for me to find places to stay when I turned on the ol' boy band charm," he stated bluntly, a wry grin on his face. "I never told him I was planning on moving to the village. As far as he knew, I was liable to up and leave again at any time."

"Yeah, but you'd already been there for a year. He could've talked to you. And he approached you in the first place. That's scummy, no matter how you try and spin it, John."

John Dory simply shrugged, tugging the scrap book over to himself to flip through a few pages. "Maybe. Maybe he just said those things to me because of Dickory. Maybe he realized I just wasn't worth his time." John shut the scrap book, sliding it across the table. "I'll never really know the reason, because I left the village the next day. I didn't say good bye, and I never went back."

"John-"

"No. Floyd, look. All that, in the end, happened well over a decade ago. I can't keep holding a grudge against him for choosing to break it off with me. Even if he was cruel in the way he did it. All I can really do is try to keep my heart from breaking again." John heaved a sigh, slumping against the table top, his cheek squishing against it as he turned his head to look up at Floyd. "It's why I left him up on that hill. I know all I've really done is run away again, but he's going to be leaving with the caravan in a few days. Spending the morning with him, it just brought back all the feelings I had back then. It hurts."

Floyd sighed through his nose, tugging his chair closer to John and settling himself back down. "You still love him, don't you?"

John squeezed his eyes shut, nodding against the table. "I do."

~

"So, if it wasn't a fight, then what was it?" Poppy asked, sitting herself down next to Hickory.

Hickory sniffed, grabbing his hat from where it had been discarded on the ground so he would have something to fidget with. "Gettin' my comeuppance, I s'pose," he said with a shrug. "John and I, I'm sure you could tell, we used to be a thing."

"Hard to miss, with the way you guys were looking at each other half the morning," Poppy nodded, getting herself comfortable as Hickory spoke.

"Yeah…We broke up on pretty bad terms, back then. I…I treated him pretty badly."

"What?! How?"

Hickory laughed gently, rubbing at one of his eyes, "You really want to hear the whole story?"

"Uh, duh! Tell me everything," Poppy enthused, sitting forward eagerly.

"All right," Hickory sighed, a small smile on his face at Poppy's never ending enthusiasm. "John'll tell you that we met when I was seventeen, but that's not entirely true."

"Ooooh, I can already tell this is gonna be good," Poppy cooed, resting her cheek on her fist.

"When I was about ten, a pop troll came to the village that me n' my brother grew up in. It was kinda rare to see travellin' trolls, and honestly no one had seen a pop troll since before I'd hatched-"

"Because of the Bergens," Poppy helpfully interrupted.

"Because of the Bergens," Hickory agreed, patting her knee, "So here was a traveler all the way up in the mountains, where few trolls ventured, and a pop troll t'boot? He was an enigma." He wiggled his fingers through the air, making Poppy giggle. "My ten year old brain was immediately obsessed. I wanted t'know where he was from, how he found us, where he was going next - everythin'. But Dickory didn't like that. He didn't trust the traveler and made me stay inside near the entire time he was in the village. Then a couple weeks passed, and he was gone."

"So, I mean, you really didn't technically meet until later," Poppy hummed, frowning lightly.

"True. But I thought about him endlessly after that. It made me realize there was more to the world than our little village. That I could leave," Hickory enthused, gesturing out towards the bustling town below the hill. "It opened up my whole world when he came to town." He paused, letting his hands fall back into his lap. "But I was stuck under Dickory's thumb. At least, that was until he started workin' as a bounty hunter. I dunno when or how he found out about the line o' work, but he started disappearin' for long periods of time an' leavin' me with random folks 'round town. Eventually, when I was seventeen, he left me with this real sweet older couple, who occasionally had the rare troll that passed through the mountains stay with 'em. Low an' behold, one day I'm mindin' my business puttin' dishes away, when none other than John Dory walks through the door. I nearly dropped the dish I'd been holdin', but I managed to keep it together enough t'ask 'im if he wanted me t'show him 'round the village after he'd rested up. He took me up on the offer, an' we spent a good couple months together."

"Awww! That's so sweet," Poppy cooed, grinning at Hickory.

"Yeah. Real sweet up until I told 'im I had a crush on 'im," he said, smiling crookedly as Poppy's smile fell, "He let me down real sweet like, explainin' that he was headed out of town soon, an' that I was just too young for 'im. Which, valid points. I was still heart broken, though, an' avoided 'im after that. I even nearly missed my chance to say good bye to 'im. But I'd given his rejection some good thought, an' he was right. I was too young, an' he was a drifter. I was gonna be sad for a while, but I treasured the time we'd gotten to spend together. So I said my good byes, and he went on his way."

"But I thought you said you broke up with him?"

"I did," Hickory nodded, turning his gaze out towards the village, "John came back to the village a few years later, right on time for my twenty-first birthday. He appeared at my birthday party like some sorta specter. I turned 'round an' he was just standin' there, sippin' at a drink against a wall, just watchin' everyone else havin' fun. I thought for a minute that I had t'be dreamin', but no. He was really there. An' it was my birthday, so I took a bit of a risk." He tipped his head to smirk at Poppy, "Took 'im home with me that night."

"Oh!" Poppy flushed, waving a hand at Hickory, "You scoundrel."

Hickory laughed, shrugging as he pulled his knees up and sat forward to rest his elbows on them. "I guess so. But John, he just…he makes me feel things I never thought I'd feel, y'know?"

Poppy smiled warmly at Hickory. "Yeah, I do."

"Cause o' Branch?"

Poppy giggled, flushing as she covered her face with her hands, muttering a muffled, "Yeah."

"You two're real cute," Hickory hummed, patting her on the knee. "But, anyhow…John an' I were real happy for a good bit o' time. I think he stayed with us for a year or so? Dickory'd been gone on some long ass hunt an' I honestly wasn't sure if he was ever gonna come back. I know it makes me sound terrible, but I'd kinda hoped that he never would. John an' I were happy." A bitter frown turned Hickory's lips, and Poppy dropped her hands into her lap, watching him curiously. "He suddenly came back into town one day, makin' me spend all this time with 'im as he talked my ear off about bounty huntin'. It put me in a right foul mood, which carried over when I finally did get to spend time with John. I felt right bad when he called me out on my shit, too. I didn't realize I was treatin' him different 'cause of my bad mood. I tried to straighten up an' get back to our usual routine, but Dickory was havin' none of it. One day, he pulled me aside an' told me that since I was of age now I shouldn't be foolin' 'round with some travellin' tart. I needed to get out an' work, an' if I wanted to see more o' the world so badly then he would take me with 'im on his next job." Hickory sighed and rolled his shoulders, stretching back out to lean back on his hands. "He got a little rough with me at one point when I told 'im I wanted t'stay with John, an' that we were happy the way we were. He dragged me into town to show me where John was talkin' to some o' the other villagers, then pinned me down so I couldn't get away, just so he could tell me about how John was apparently lookin' to build us a home. I asked him how he thought that would make me wanna leave, an' he just laughed at me an' told me that if I really loved John because of how he was free to go anywhere he wanted, an' be whoever he wanted, then why was I so willing to tie him down and force him to stay in our little village. Never occured to me that John and I could leave together. I just watched him laughin' with the other villagers an' kept playin' scenarios in my head about how he'd grow to resent me for keepin' 'im there."

"Oh, Hickory," Poppy hiccupped, tears welled up in her eyes, "that's awful!"

"Yeah. But it wasn't as bad as what I did to John after that."

"Oh no! What'd you do?"

Hickory let out a breath, looking ashamed of himself. "I left with Dickory for a week without tellin' 'im anythin'. Dickory took me out on a short job, an' when I got back John was in a tizzy. He was so worried about me, I felt awful. But Dickory told me he had a longer job lined up for us, an' we would be leavin' the next day. I had no idea how long it'd take, an' I didn't even know if Dickory an' I would even go back to the village after. So, I had to set John free."

"Hickory…what did you do?"

"I was cold to 'im. Told 'im I was leavin', an' didn't know if I'd even be back. Then - oh Poppy," Hickory rubbed at his face, "I told him since he was a travellin' pop troll, he shouldn't have any trouble findin' a place to shack up an' keep warm. That we'd had our fun, but I needed to get movin' an' find somethin' 'serious'. I was just awful to 'im. I really don't blame him for leavin' like he did just now."

Poppy looked devastated for a moment, before jumping up to her feet. "So, you need to apologize!" She stared down at Hickory with determination, her fists clenched in the air in front of her.

"Wait-what? Poppy, weren't you listenin'?"

"Of course I was! But, Hickory, for all that is trolly, you've loved John Dory since you were ten. And not even because he was in a band! Now that you're both in a good place in your lives, and able to make amends, you can't seriously tell me you're okay with just moving on with the caravan and leaving things the way they are, are you?!"

Hickory swallowed thickly, fiddling with his hat for a moment, before yanking it onto his head and smacking the ground. "Good gosh golly, you're right, miss Poppy. I can't give up now. I gotta apologize an' clear the air between us. I can't just let things fester like I did before. We gotta stop this cycle of one of us leavin' the other over an' over." He stood, face full of determination. "Let's do this."

"That's the spirit!" Poppy cheered. "And I have the perfect plan to help!"

~

"So, what're you going to do?" Floyd asked, the two had migrated from the table to John's couch, cuddled together under a blanket.

"I don't know…I could probably hide in Branch's bunker until they leave. That's always an option, right?"

Floyd rolled his eyes, flicking John Dory in the ear, earning himself a pathetic sounding whine from the other. "No. As much as I think that what Hickory did was absolutely deplorable, you're probably right that he did it because of his brother. And you still care about him. He obviously still has feelings for you. You two should at least talk, if nothing else."

John sighed heavily, pulling his goggles off his head to toss them across the room. "You know I'm no good at talking. Plus, I'm pretty sure after running off like I did, he probably doesn't even want to talk to me again."

"You just talked to me. I think you did really well. And if Hickory doesn't want to talk to you again, at least you can say you tried. Trying and being honest are the only ways you're going to find yourself any closure about this." Floyd gently ruffled his older brothers hair, "But maybe wait until tomorrow? After you've had some time to rest up. I don't think I've ever seen you cry so much. You must be tired."

John snorted and shoved Floyd lightly, shooting him a playful glare. "This coming from mister I used to cry when even so much as a slightly raised voice was in my general vicinity."

"Exactly why I know how tiring crying can be," Floyd snarked back, tugging at John's ear. "Don't be petulant. Get some rest. Hang out in Rhonda for the rest of the day. I'll bring by some dinner later and we can talk some more, okay? Maybe you can show me some other scrap books you've got stashed away. I saw a bunch more in that cupboard."

"Yeah, okay. That sounds good."

"I'll see you later, JD."

~

The next day started pretty similarly to how the previous had. The sun was shining and birds were chirping, but this time John didn't have an exuberant pop queen banging at his door.

John rolled out of bed and puttered around Rhonda, getting himself ready for the day. As he pulled his goggles on he stared at himself in the mirror. He'd slept relatively well, so the perpetual bags under his eyes weren't quite so prominent, and the redness in them from crying had, luckily, completely cleared up overnight. He hadn't picked out anything special to wear, just his usual fur lined vest and cargo shorts. Pretty well the same thing he'd been wearing the day before. He didn't think he looked like anything particularly special, but yesterday Hickory had looked at him like he was the whole universe.

"Hey now, stop that," he scolded his reflection as his cheeks began to darken. "Don't get your hopes up, and don't expect anything. You're just going to talk, and if we end up at least staying friends, that's good enough." He poked the glass in front of him with a stern frown. "Be happy if you even get closure."

He then turned on his heel and headed out of Rhonda, startling when he found Floyd just outside the door with his fist raised to knock.

"Oh! You're up," Floyd laughed, stepping back to gesture at Poppy and Branch who were standing just behind him, "Branch was convinced you'd still be asleep."

"What? And miss out on a party thrown by none other than the Queen of Pop herself? I don't think so," John laughed, trundling down Rhonda's steps and giving her a fond pat before stepping away.

"Oh, good. I was a bit worried that after yesterday, you wouldn't want to come," Poppy sighed, laughing nervously as she glanced at Branch who nudged her in the side. John raised an eyebrow at their antics and glanced at Floyd who simply shrugged.

"Riiiight…Well, I'm up and about. Shall we?" John swept his arm out towards the entrance to Rhonda's clearing, waiting until Branch and Poppy began to walk before following next to Floyd.

"Are you actually okay?" Floyd asked as he and John fell back a bit from Poppy and Branch, a light frown on his face.

"I don't know," John reluctantly admitted, rubbing at his neck, "I guess? I think I know what I want to say to him, but that all depends on if he's even around or wants to talk to me. I guess I'm a bit anxious?"

"It's okay to be anxious. And if you need me, you know I'll be there for you," Floyd offered, patting John on the shoulder.

"Yeah. Thanks, bro," John smiled, nodding a little as the group of four broached what most of the village fondly referred to as the 'Party Clearing'. The area was almost exclusively used for parties and events, and was currently decorated in country themed decorations for the visiting caravan. Fake cacti were peppered around the area, while what appeared to be hay bales were scattered around for trolls to sit on. A stage and DJ booth were set up at one end of the clearing, and twinkle lights were strung over the entire clearing with various colors of streamers hanging from them. John was sure they'd be amazing once night fell and the lights were turned on.

"Okay! I gotta go do some last minute prep, and make sure all of the tables for food are set up properly. Everything today has got to be perfect," Poppy cheered as she dashed away, the brothers visibly cringing as she said the word 'perfect'.

"So, wait…why're we here so early?" John asked, frowning a bit as he looked around to see a handful of trolls milling about and setting things up.

"Because Poppy likes to be early," Branch stated bluntly, folding his arms over his chest, "And she wanted to make sure you showed up."

"What? Why?"

Branch glanced at his brother, shrugging a little. "Because reasons," he replied unhelpfully before wandering away, leaving an incredibly confused John and Floyd in his wake.

"Uh," John blinked, turning to Floyd with a frown, "Do you know what's up with him?"

"Not a clue," Floyd shrugged while shaking his head, only to turn towards the stage as someone tapped on a microphone and started a sound check. He blinked in surprise and grabbed at John Dory to face the stage as well, as a green and orange troll walked forward with a guitar in hand.

"Hickory?" John gasped, dumbfounded as to why the county troll would be up on stage, especially when there were barely any trolls in the clearing yet.

"Howdy, y'all," Hickory said into the mic, tipping his hat and clearing his throat. "This, uhm…this ain't really for the party or nothin', but I heard grand gestures are real in right now, so uhm, here I am."

John began to walk across the clearing towards the stage in a bit of a daze, watching Hickory as he nervously fiddled with his guitar.

"This is for, well," Hickory laughed lightly, his eyes trained on John as he approached, "It's for you, darlin'." And with that, he began to sing. "Tell me what I have to do tonight, 'cause I'd do anything to make it right…" ((click here if you wanna listen to the song Hickory sings, and the namesake of this fic))

John was enraptured as Hickory sang, unconsciously clutching at the front of his vest as tears welled up in his eyes as the song came to a close. "Hickory," he sobbed with a hiccup, rushing the stage as Hickory jumped down, catching the country troll in a hug. A small smattering of cheering and clapping made John pull back and look around, flushing as he realized that all of the trolls that had previously been milling about were watching them.

"Oh, this is embarrassing," John muttered, burying his face in Hickory's shoulder, causing the other to chuckle.

"Why don't we go somewhere a bit more private so we can talk? How's that sound?" Hickory asked, nudging John's temple with his nose.

"Yeah, okay," John muttered, pulling away to drag Hickory from the clearing by his wrist, the cheers following them as they left.

After a beat, Branch walked back over to Floyd with a self satisfied smirk on his face.

"You and Poppy planned this whole thing, didn't you?" Floyd asked, raising an eyebrow at his baby brother.

"Well, Poppy did. She just used me as a sounding board and asked how I thought John might react to something like this." He shrugged, stuffing his hands into his vest pockets.

"Good job, Bitty B."

"Someone's gotta look out for that idiot now and then. Glitter knows, he won't ever take care of himself."

"He's trying," Floyd sighed, wrapping an arm around Branch's shoulders to pull him into a half hug.

"I know."

~

John tugged Hickory along until they were a good ways away from the party clearing, quite near to the forest trails they'd walked along the day before. He finally let go of the other and spun on his heel to face him, his cheeks flushed and a mix of determination and fear on his face. Hickory frowned lightly, reaching out to cup John's cheek.

"You okay there, darlin'?"

John let out a shuddery breath, leaning in to Hickory's touch for a moment, before wrapping his fingers around the country trolls wrist and pulling it away from his face. "You hurt me, Hick. No amount of sweet ballad performances are going to change that," he began, holding fast as Hickory turned his face away and tried to tug his wrist free, "BUT. But…I am willing to talk about this and clear the air between us. I think we really need to discuss what happened all those years ago."

"Yer right. 'Course, yer right," Hickory nodded, "I wasn't tryin' to avoid a serious conversation with ya, I promise. I know I gotta explain myself, an' you don't owe me any sorta forgiveness."

"No one said I was unwilling to forgive you, sweetheart," John said, returning Hickory's earlier gesture and tilting the country trolls face towards him, brushing his thumb over his cheek. Hickory's face lit up as he stared intently at John. "We just really gotta clear away the old baggage, first."

"Right," Hickory nodded as the two moved to sit beneath one of the towering trees. "Where do ya want me to start?"

"I don't think we need to go that far back. Just…tell me what happened when Dickory came back to town. Where did you go for that week, and what made you decide to try and make me hate you before you left."

Hickory fidgeted, swallowing thickly as he tucked his hands between his knees. "Okay. Well, when Dickory came back an' saw the two o' us together, he was not pleased. The reason I kept bein' so waspish to ya was because he was bound an' determined to make me miserable before he knew I was gonna meet up with ya. An' then he dragged me on a job with 'im without any warnin'. I didn't get a chance to even think about tellin' ya where I was goin', cause I just woke up one mornin' in a wagon that was headin' down the mountain. When we did return, he got real nasty with me when I tried to go back home to ya. I wasn't thinkin' straight, an' he put this thought in my head that I was keepin' you trapped, instead of letting ya be yerself. He told me you were lookin' to move to the village, permanent like, an' I didn't want that fer you. You were always meant t'be free."

"…That's stupid."

Hickory let out a bark of laughter, tilting his head to smile wryly at John. "I realize that now. But at the time, Dick had me all messed up an' I thought the only thing I could do was let you go. Well…force ya t'leave. It wasn't fair, what I did, an' it weren't right. I know that now. I've known that fer a long time now, actually. I should've just talked to ya about it. I've imagined, so many times, how we could've just up an' left in the middle of the night an' been happy and together for all these years. I wasted so much of our time, bein' stupid."

"Yeah. You did," John breathed, watching as Hickory winced, "But there's not much we can do about the past, is there?"

Hickory lifted his head, watching John with hope in his eyes. John couldn't help but reach out and brush his fingers through Hickory's hair, relishing in how the country troll practically melted into his touch.

"If there's one thing I've been trying to learn and come to terms with myself, it's that the past will leave scars behind, whether you meant to hurt yourself and others, or not. But, you can work to help heal them. It'll take time and effort, but I think it'll be worth it if we try."

Tears slid unbidden down Hickory's cheeks, even as he smiled warmly at John. "Lookit you, gettin' so wise in yer old age."

"Shut up," John laughed, shoving lightly at Hickory's shoulder, only to tug him back in close to plant a kiss on his cheek. Hickory chuckled, quickly tipping his head to catch John in a proper kiss, a shiver running up his spine at the surprised little noise the teal troll let out.

"You wanna head back to the party now?" Hickory asked as they pulled away from each other, John taking the opportunity to duck down and snuggle into Hickory's chest.

"Not yet," he sighed, letting his eyes drift shut as he curled around Hickory, "Let's just stay here for a bit."

"Whatever you'd like, darlin'," Hickory hummed, letting his fingers comb through John's hair as they basked in each others company and the warm sun shining down on them.

[rezqrecovery]

https://rezq.space/wp-content/uploads/2021/02/REZQ-Excerpt-Earth.pdf

Hi everyone

i realised I never posted this here - anyone who has been interested in the worldbuilding and hypertext storytelling I've been doing over at rezq.space may be interested in this excerpt from a longer form story I am working on.

The overall story broadly concerns Thom, a depressive young doglike guy trying to work and live in the dystopian hypercapitalist spacefaring future where gravity is rationed, the value of money pinballs unpredictably from second to second, and patent trolling causes shortages of basic staples. Originally a gig worker for a last-mile space courier based on what was once known as Earth, he becomes a deep space rescue worker by default when the entire business that he was contracting for is bought out and shut down by REZQ, a new breed of ruthlessly profiteering company. REZQ putatively provides recovery services to people whose spacecraft get into trouble in deep space, but they are more controlling, ruthless, and . Alone and untrained aboard the giant empty vessel Angel Fish, can Thom keep his job - and his mind?

This excerpt concerns a short bit of context and scene setting on Thom's home planet (we would know it as Earth, but its name changes according to who happens to be sponsoring it at that time). I'd be really keen for any feedback or thoughts on any element of this. I'd like to continue it but it's obviously early days, and it's always hard for original setting things to find an audience if they don't conform to things that are already wildly popular. Thank you!

[secretthegriffin]

A MOST RESTFUL NIGHT

summary: crosshair often fights his exhaustion, but tonight proved to be a little bit more difficult...

pairing: crosshair / fem! jedi ( can be seen as reader as they're unnamed)

A/N : so this is basically an excerpt from a story I'll never finish. I don't usually post what I write but I felt this is special. I also would like to point out I am in no way shape or form a professional writer so I'm sorry if there's mistakes but anyways this is mostly in cross' pov. and its super fluff. with softie and slightly touched starved cross. so no warnings. :)

He sat alone in the darkness of the shuttle. All of his crewmates have been asleep for some time now so the ship was especially quiet. He held his fire-puncher with his supplies, ready to relax and clean the weapon. Most of the time his rifle hardly needed it. Alas he cleaned the damn thing so much though it turned habitual. Often avoiding sleep entirely he would indulge himself with said habit until complete exhaustion. It is so cleaning his rifle, he found himself entirely lost in the activity. He didn't even notice the hesitant figure approaching him from the shadows of the ship.

"How can you see? Its so dang dark" she sighed.

Almost startled, he looked up from the gun speechless. There the jedi stood as breathtaking as ever, standing before him.

"I don't need the light, I can see in the dark". He replied sarcastically.

Avoiding the jedi's sleepy eyes, he took her in. she wore her regular jedi robes, except she had a tightly fitted tank and shorts on as if she threw the robes over her sleep wear.

"figures" she yawned stretching her hands above her to the ceiling. cross was thankful it was dark, she wouldn't see his hawk like eyes devour every inch of her as she stretched. From her pretty face and soft curves down to her beautiful breasts and long smooth legs. Cross would be lying to himself if he said she wasn't attractive. Maker, she was down right the most stunning jedi cross had ever laid his eyes on. He keenly watched as she carefully made her way through the dark to the opposite side of the sofa he sat on. yawning once more she gestured to the rifle.

"Well, go on" she proclaimed.

"What?" He was taken aback a bit to be honest.

"Don't let me stop you from cleaning the damn thing". Gesturing once more to the rifle, but with a smile.

That damn smile. It made cross's heart flutter a bit. She could never know what she does to him. She made him felt things one never thought could exist. He hated it. Hated she made him felt this way. And yet. He hated how much he loved it. oh so much. With heat rising to his face, he smirked. going back to his business. Basking in the warm feel of her watchful eyes as he silently cleaned the weapon. He didn't quite understand why she watched. But he also didn't really care. He loved the idea of being the very object of her interest in this moment.

"Its soothing". She whispered. as if reading his mind.

"Excuse me?" He whispered back.

"The noise. Watching you...its.. Meditating" she hummed, closing her eyes.

"hmm". He didn't really know what to say, she must be especially tired.

"Can I get a better view?" Her bold question surprised cross a bit, making him stop suddenly to directly look at her.

"What do you mean?"

She huffed. her cheeks going pink as she smiled at him again, turning his insides to mush.

"Like this". She lifted his arm off his lap and gently adjusted herself to lay across his lap so her head rested on his thigh, looking at the rifle and his hands.

"Now I can watch closely and comfortably." she said quietly lifting her hands to snuggle between her head and his thigh.

"If I didn't know any better, sweetheart, I'd think you're looking for a different kind of entertainment tonight". He teased with a chuckle. Though he was not so subtly trying to hide the fact he was entirely flustered by the closeness. He couldn't take his eyes off her beautiful face. The warmth of her body on his thighs sent shivering chills through his body. Maker what he wouldn't give to wrap his arms around her and pull her closer to him, into his lap.

she giggled at his response but playfully smacked his leg.

"shut up. now c'mon, I'm trying to meditate." she insisted.

Looking down onto the gorgeous jedi, Cross gladly went back to his rifle, but not without a stupid smug smile on his face.

She watched intently as his skillful fingers cleaned the rifle. His hands were so carefully delicate as he took the weapon apart. She was surprised the mean marksman could care enough about something to treat it so. Watching as if he was an artist, it relaxed her. Sighing as she slowly fell asleep to the soft clanking of the metal.

As soon as Cross noticed she was soundlessly asleep, he thanked the stars for such a moment. His gun long forgotten, Cross silently studied her features and the gentle rise and fall of her chest. She looked so gorgeously peaceful and so serene. and so perfect against his lap.

"Mesh'la". He breathed. Gently brushing loose strands of hair from her face. His hands trembled as he ever so lightly with the tips of his fingers traced her face. they ached to reach out and hold her, but he could never let himself do that. After some time she began softly snoring. So with a tired and heavy sigh Cross tucked his arms under her, lifting her to his chest bridal style. He slowly and carefully made his way to her bunk. Softly laying her against the cot. But as he turned to go to his own cot, her hand reached out to his wrist stopping him.

"Do you wanna lay with me?" she whispered. She sounded so tired, and so beautiful. Cross sighed another heavy sigh, he too was tired. hesitating, he slid next to her, not touching her, but sitting awkwardly just next to her. He eyed her as she lazily curled herself next to his side, falling back to sleep. for a moment he thought about going to his own bed. until she reached out in her sleep, wrapping her arm across his chest to snuggle into his side. cross's heart completely stumped. He completely gave into his feeling he was never going to beat, he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her as close to him as possible. He curled into her, almost melting. Soaking in the warmth of everything her. He felt so undeniably comfortable, he wished the stars this wasn't a cruel dream. As he held her tighter to his chest he succumbed to the drowsiness he'd been avoiding for so long. Loosing another internal battle. Falling oh so deeply into a blissful slumber.

-----the end---- <3

[literary-illuminati]

Book Review 57 – Pale by Wildbow

I have been reading Pale as it released from the very beginning in 2020 until the end. As such I am clearly suffering from a severe and acute case of Stockholm Syndrome, and you shouldn’t trust a single thing I say. But to try and step back a bit – Pale is the best 4 million word serial I have ever read, and very nearly even good.

The story follows Avery, Lucy and Verona, precocious and for various reasons marginalized teenagers in a decaying Canadian ski town. They are recruited by a council of the various ghouls, ghosts and goblins who live in the shadows of the town to be its Official Witches and investigate the mysterious death of the Carmine Beast, the greater spirit who stood as judge over all contests of struggle and violence in the region (less in the hopes that find anything and more so that any nosy outsiders can be truthfully told it has already been handled). Being of a protagonist-ey bent, they rapidly exceed their new patrons’ expectations, especially the ones among them who had a hand in the murder. After that it’s basically just literally several million words of things escalating further and further out of anyone’s control.

Or, I kid, but it really is impossible to talk about Pale without forgrounding its length and medium, I think. This is a serial which ran continuously with at least one update a week for more than three years, and (to grab another story about child wizards to compare) is roughly four complete Harry Potter series’ in length. Beyond being an entirely superhuman accomplishment as far as writing productivity goes, this had unavoidable effects on the story as it was being told. It also makes it literally impossible to provide anything like a complete plot summary in a review short enough that anyone will read it. So just take my word that there’s a lot of it, and we’ll come back to the others length-related issues.

This is an urban fantasy book, and a kitchen sink one at that – it’s clearly one of the underlying principles of the setting that it should, insofar as possible, be able to fit every type of storybook monster and horror movie plot and twilight zone episode within it somewhere. Underlying and ordering it all is the axiom that (almost) nothing magical can lie. The world will only respond to your word if its actually worth something – contradicting or gainsaying yourself harms your karma and sets the universe against you, breaking a sworn oath is an open invitation to fates worse than death. The natural consequence of this is that every practitioner (wizard, basically) worth shit has been trained from birth to be an asshole genie and most of the really powerful Others (catch-all term for supernatural creatures) come by it naturally.

None of which is new – this is the second serial Wildbow has written in the setting – but they do combine to make a bunch of amateur detectives investigating a murder really, really fun. The heroines POVs also offers a great way to introduce the setting to the reader, or, at least, provides an excellent justification for in character exposition dumps – and to be clear, this is a series with lore. I consider this an absolute win, but if you don’t like elaborate asides about random monsters or marginal otherworlds that clearly exist only because the author thought they were cool, then this is not the series for you. (On the other hand, most of them are absolutely cool). The world is vast, and the story is full of asides and tangents about things that could easily sustain a novel in their own right.

The other way the exposition is provided is through occasional Extra Materials mini-chapters (quite regular during the beginning of the story, less so as it goes on), which are just excerpts of in-universe documentation – specifically things that the protagonists or occasionally another major character would have been reading. Everything from class notes to chatlogs to investigation summaries as written by one of the girls to local social media posts to a dozen other things. Surprisingly good graphic design on most of them too, which really helps sell them as in-universe artifacts and as ways to characterize the implied authors/readers. It’s very much to the serial’s detriment that these fade away as it goes on.

The series has three protagonists, and chapters alternate between each of their POVs and internal narration. It actually does an excellent job differentiating between Lucy, Avery and Verona and giving them their own distinct voices and making each compelling in their own right (not that I don’t have my favourite, but). While the book’s not perfect about it, on the whole they mostly feel like unusually bright and dedicated teenagers (and increasingly incredibly traumatized child soldiers with variably healthy coping mechanisms), rather than short and legally disabled adults.

As is fairly common with web serials, the normal chapters are intercut with interludes from the perspective of some more minor character. Across all Wildbow’s works, these are honestly where he really shines most, I think. They’re each essentially short stories introducing and providing the history and characterization of someone from their own point of view, in the process more often than not totally recontextualizing their role in the story so far, with how they advance the actual plot almost incidental half the time. If I wanted to sell someone on the setting with as little investment as possible, I would probably just link them the first interlude – the first 90% of the chapter is a really quite good standalone horror story about a totally normal kinda shitty kid getting drawn into and being consumed by an occult living ritual (with its own creepy song! And cannibalism!)

Wildbow is actually an incredibly gifted character writer - both as a web serial author (but on the whole that’s not really any great accomplishment) and just, generally. Despite having an absolutely comically sprawling cast (like, dozens, minimum. If you told me hundreds I’d believe you), he manages to give the vast, vast majority of ones that matter their own distinct aesthetics, voices, and even their own little character arcs and plotlines. Even as much as I complain about bloat and pacing, it never stops being a joy to just spend time in any of the three protagonists’ heads, and I was deeply invested in them achieving their dreams in a way I rarely if ever am for fictional characters.

Now, the complaining. Wildbow is, as I said, one of the best character writers I know working today. The same cannot be said for his skill writing action scenes – which is incredibly unfortunate, because there are so, so fucking many of them. Some serve a real narrative purpose or showcase some bit of characterization, but most could honestly be cut by 90% and you wouldn’t lose anything except wordcount – even the ones which should be there tend to drag on past their natural end because of the book’s love of making things as desperate and hardwon as possible. Which I wouldn’t necessarily mind but like, there are individual action set-pieces that are longer than some published novels. At a certain point exhaustion sets in. If I had to guess, I’d put this down to the fact that when you’re writing 10k words a week and don’t have any concrete ideas of where to go next with the plot worked out, just extending the action scene and throwing some new monsters or puzzles or reversals of fortune at the heroes can eat up a chapter and buy you some time – but just because it’s an understandable consequence of the serial format doesn’t mean I need to like it.

Perhaps reading far too much into it, but if I had to guess, I would say the story’s more structural issues stem from the same thing. Pale was originally planned as a (relatively) short and (relatively) light serial, but in the process of writing rapidly ballooned past all planning and expectation. Which like, as I said, I just enjoyed spending time in the various protagonists’ heads and seeing them develop, but at a certain point you can absolutely start to see the plot starting to outpace all planning and spinning off in multiple entirely new directions that were pretty clearly informed by whatever idea Wildbow was turning over in his head at the time. Sometimes this worked out very nicely – I still love Avery’s whole Thunder Bay/accidental love triangle arc. Sometimes it’s a bit mixed – Wonderkand is a very fun idea, but tonally and aesthetically is kind of a mismatch with 90% of the rest of the setting. Sometimes, well – did anyone like the extended Aurum/Dark Fall trial sequence? But even aside from individual arc quality, if you are someone who cares even slightly about things like ‘pacing’, ‘narrative discipline’, or ‘plot points/foreshadowing not going in weird directions or fading in the background because the author just forgot/kind of lost interest in them in the course or writing a novella weekly for three years’ then oh boy is this not the story for you.

A similar sort of thing happens, I think, with the story’s themes. Pale is from the beginning very explicitly concerned with ideas of punitive versus rehabilitative justice, an already slightly fraught use of the subjugation/binding of magical creatures as a metaphor for oppression and colonization, and just generally with the idea of building a better world in the hidden corners of the current one. The story, well, remains very interested with those subjects, but having any coherent viewpoint on them falls to the wayside compared to coming up with ways to advance the plot or dilemmas to throw at the protagonists or just vivid bits of imagery in the moment. This more or less generalizes – I kind of get the sense that Wildbow set out wanting to write something that goes against his narrative reflexes/habits, but as the story went on and the writing piled up they just kind of crept back in. Certainly for a story that take pains at first to emphasize how hellish and cruel long term binding and confinement are, the happy ending involves a lot of various cruel and torturous prisons that are portrayed as somewhere between necessary and just. The big final villain also more or less works on a character level, but thematically is basically the single worst choice of anyone the protagonists faced down across the entire story.

I’m accentuating the negative here, and part of that is just because I’m a miserable husk of a human, but it’s also just that Pale’s real problems tend to be structural, while its high points are much more particular and specific, and hard to sell without immense amounts of context – there are so many random side characters who get more compelling stories than the actual protagonists of some books I’ve read this year, and a half dozen scenes that are pretty permanently burned into my memory. My favourite dynamic involves a character whose only present for, like, 3% of the story max.

At one point the story was intended to end with Arc 13, followed by a hiatus and then a sequel. I still think this would have been the correct choice, even that ending would rip my fucking heart out and also possibly get Wildbow literal bombs mailed to his house. Still – if you can stand that sort of ending and also are the sort of person to read million-word web serials to begin with, that would be my recommendation. Get to that point, and then decide for yourself how invested you are in spending time in the heads of the protagonists and in the world. Or read Pact, which is like a fifth of the size and ostensibly set in the same setting – though leans so much further into horror than urban fantasy for tone that functionally there’s a lot of discrepancies.

All of which said, Verona Lucy and Avery are going to live in my head for the rest of my life and I make no apologies about this.

[bettsfic]

18 and 19

18. Choose a passage from your writing. Tell me about the backstory of this moment. How you came up with it, how it changed from start to end. Spicy addition: Questioner provides the passage.

passage below the cut! this is from Skinless when Layla and Henry meet. by this point we've mostly been in Henry's POV, where his coworker Layla seems like a nice young woman with whom he is foaming-at-the-mouth obsessed. we get to her POV (second person because that's just how she thinks, and also this is a flashback because her pacing and story structure is entirely separate from Henry's because i hate myself i guess) and find out she's been totally deranged for Henry from the beginning. this is the first time we see Henry from outside his POV.

backstory:

the career fair scene went through many iterations but has become an unfortunate foundational turning point of the story, despite the fact that a commercial underwriting department of a bank would never be at a college career fair

i did once research every question of every exam for a class where i thought the professor was being cruel. i also went to the dean about it, and there was an investigation, and every single student in the class went from a C to a B. (that's how bad it was: we all had the same grade, based on basically nothing, which was deeply ironic considering it was a statistics class)

like Layla, i've also had the Kids in the Hall theme song stuck in my head for most of my life

ultimately Skinless is a light-hearted rom com about two walking red flags who are trying to make their relationship work even though one of them is not who he says he is and the other is plotting a murder

the ethics test at the bank was really only 10 questions

19. Tell me a story about your writing journey. When did you start? Why did you start? Were there bumps along the way? Where are you now and where are you going?

the first thing i ever wrote was a series of stories in my diary when i was 8 or 9, and they all had the same premise in different settings: a child lives in a community but everyone hates him (they were always boy povs) and eventually the child runs away or is killed by the townspeople and everyone is much happier with him gone. the end.

a wrote a bit more here and there until i was 14 or so, at which point i seemed to forget writing fiction was even a thing. i kept a journal from 14 onward and that was the only creative writing i did besides the occasional poem until i was 24 and started writing fanfic.

i'm now 34 and i have an MFA in creative writing and half a PhD, and i've had some short publications and won some awards and i do artist residencies sometimes and have an agent. i'm hoping to put two manuscripts out on submission later this year or early next.

one of which will be Skinless, an excerpt of which is below the cut.

from Chapter 5:

In your final semester of college, you attend a career fair. As you wander the booths, you begin to consider that there might be industries more suited to people like you. You spot a bank. The man standing at the booth is talking to someone. You notice immediately that his congeniality is feigned, proven when the applicant walks away and his face returns to apathy. 

He is wearing a sharp black suit. Black dress shirt. Black tie. He is in his late twenties, perhaps. He has light brown skin and his hair is buzzed close to his scalp in a way that makes you eager to touch his head, feel it against your palm. He is tall and broad-shouldered, but he holds himself like he isn’t, slightly slouched, the way people stand in public transit to give others more room.

Something about him piques your curiosity, and as you walk toward him the small spark of your initial question mark grows into something that consumes you. You can’t even tell what exactly is drawing you to him. It’s not his beauty—although, aesthetically speaking, he is quite pleasing. It’s not his attire, though it’s strange to see a businessman in all black. It’s not the bored blankness of his face that reflects how you have felt these past four years pretending to be a peppy sorority girl. But it’s something, and suddenly you’re standing in front of him and handing him your resume.

He takes it and scans it. This is a bizarre interaction, this not speaking and not acknowledging each other thing, but he doesn’t seem to notice. Without even looking at you, he says, “Tell me about a time someone blamed you for something that wasn’t your fault, and what you did about it.” 

His voice doesn’t match him at all, this enormous man with this soft yet vaguely robotic voice. When you say nothing, he glances at you expectantly. You feel small and young. He doesn’t even see you. You are just one student among the many he will speak with today. 

“Last semester I had a professor who didn’t like me so he tried to give me a B,” you tell him. “I guess because I kept finding errors in our exams and proving it by cross-referencing the textbook. And it was outdated, so even if the exam matched the book, I’d be able to find newer research that conflicted with it. In a fifty-question exam, he would have to throw out almost half the questions and everyone got a way better grade.”

“You researched every question of every exam?”

“Yep.”

“Why?”

“He called a girl stupid and made her cry. And anyway, it’s not really ethical to be teaching outdated research.”

“So you—”

“Got him fired.”

“Fired? Really?”

Not exactly. He just didn’t get assigned any sections the following semester. You shrug. “Adjuncts are expendable.”

“And you don’t consider any of that underhanded?”

“I’d rather be underhanded than complaisant.”

Briefly he looks you dead in the eye. It ignites something in you like a match being struck. All the stupid princess movies you hated growing up and which Candy still makes you watch are right: love at first sight is real, and it happened to you, the person least qualified to do anything about it.

When Angie from the bank’s HR department calls you to schedule a formal interview, you begin your preparations. You buy an interview outfit. You ask Candy to teach you how to do your makeup and hair. Then you study. Common interview questions. How to answer them. What the fuck underwriting is. 

You arrive at the bank certain that the beautiful career fair man won’t be there, but he’s the one who greets you in the lobby. He’s once more wearing all black.

“Hi, Layla, good to see you again.” He holds out his hand to you. “Henry King.”

“Henry King,” you say back, awed as you shake his big, beautiful hand and look into his big, beautiful eyes. You’re going to be Layla King one day. You promise yourself you won’t go home and practice your future signature, because that would be ridiculous. 

Now you are in an elevator with Henry King, going all the way up to the thirtieth floor. He opens his mouth to pop his ears at floor sixteen. 

“Mr. King?” You wait for him to say, Call me Henry, but he doesn’t. “Do you have any tips for me?”

“Wouldn’t that give you an unfair advantage?”

“Don’t you want me to have an unfair advantage?”

He looks down and away, scratches his head, and even though he’s not smiling you get the impression he’s pleased. “As long as you don’t admit to being a psychopath, you have nothing to worry about.”

“I would never admit that.”

The elevator doors open and he holds them for you to step out first. “Just be honest,” he says, “and be yourself.”

When you arrive on your first day, Henry King is waiting for you in the lobby again, and he’s still not smiling but there is something in his eyes that tells you he’s glad to see you. He holds out his hand and says, “Congratulations.”

You won’t be shaking Henry King’s hand. You hug him and he goes oof. Tentatively he pats your back. When you pull away, you say, “Thank you for getting me the job. It really means a lot to me.”

He seems to be short-circuiting, like you have suddenly initiated improv in a well-rehearsed play. It’s fine. You have the job now, and after all, he did tell you to be yourself.

During your training, you’re required to read the corporate ethics guide and take a ten-question test. The questions are so obvious that you don’t really have to read the guide. In fact, you only need an eight out of ten to pass—which has frightening implications for the state of ethics here—but you read it like you’re studying for the MCAT. 

The section on dating in the workplace is a single paragraph. Should two employees engage in a romantic relationship, it says, it must be reported to HR. It also says that a manager dating a direct subordinate is grounds for termination.

You hail Henry over to your computer and show him the company policy on dating. Any other person would see how obvious you’re being. Not Henry. Henry says, “The ethics guide is a CYA document.” 

He uses that acronym a lot. It means Cover Your Ass. More specifically, it means to analyze all documentation from the perspective of the documenting party, whose goal is, above all things, to avoid a lawsuit. And in the event of a lawsuit, to avoid losing it.

“Look,” he says, pointing at your monitor, bent over your shoulder as you sit in your desk chair, so close you can smell him. He smells so good it makes you angry. “It says you have to report it. It doesn’t say what happens after you report it. That means the decision moves to the manager of the employees in a relationship. Then HR can wipe their hands clean of it, and the manager can fire both employees, citing that a potential breakup would create a hostile team environment.” He points to the next sentence about managers and subordinates. “It says ‘eligible for termination,’ but it doesn’t say who gets terminated. Again, probably both.”

You look up at him. “So we really can’t date?” 

Given his lack of a reaction, he seems to take your “we” to mean all employees of the company.

“It’s unprofessional.”

 

Every day the stakes grow higher. You study Henry, in part, thinking that if you dig deep enough you will find nothing, you will discover he is like all the rest, boring, bearing the sad burden of existence and merely passing the time until death. Watching television. Picking up a hobby. Sports. Disgusting.

You decide that you must first befriend Henry King. You have learned that people like talking about themselves, and for the most part they love being asked questions, because it is the status quo in the world to be self-interested. For all your faults, at least you are not self-interested. You’re very interested in others, and you’re so glad to be able to see this, in some ways, as a strength. You are at once perfect at everything but also somehow have no admirable qualities. You ask Henry King many questions and he tells you, simply, “I’m not answering that.”

You take a different tactic: you tell him about yourself. You try to be interesting. The cool stuff you learned in the classes you took, the drama of Candy’s vocational school love life. He listens and goes “uh huh.”

Next, you try to make him laugh. You are a funny person simply because, like all things, you’ve trained yourself to be. You have watched many hours of standup comedy and sketch shows. You’ve had the Kids in the Hall theme song stuck in your head for most of your life. 

One day, you’re busy looking at a client file while returning to your desk and run into the cubicle wall. Henry King laughs at you. That’s a start. 

After many months being his personal court jester, you conclude that Henry King exists in the infinitesimal Venn diagram overlap between having a dry sense of humor and being totally unable to understand sarcasm.

You’ve been looking forward to your first annual review, seeing evidence of your excellence. You’ve spent this past year learning quickly, working hard. You work through lunch sometimes. You arrive early and stay late. You take on as many deals as you can, some weeks more than Henry. You make sure everyone on the team gets a card and a cake for their birthday. Finally, you enter Jerry’s office with a notebook and a smile.

Fifteen minutes later, you return to your cubicle with a single sheet of paper marking you adequate. In every category, you “meet expectations.” No raise. No bonus. No promotion. 

Henry has a bad habit of offering hard truths in a way that is not at all gentle. “Look,” he says when you slump down into your desk chair. When he begins a sentence with “look,” you know you’re about to hear something horrible. “You’ll never get an A at work.”

He goes on to tell you the worst of all truths—that banks thrive on inefficiency and hard work is rewarded with only more work. And if you do too much work, employees will start to get fired, because it’s clear the workload isn’t high enough to justify paying so many people. You’ll also set a new standard for yourself, and if you set that standard too high, if you burn out and stop meeting it, you’re the one who’s going to get fired. The only reward you’ll ever receive is the privilege of returning to work the next day. 

To prove it, he pulls a manila folder out of his desk cabinet and hands it to you. You open it. Inside you find eleven identical sheets, each one declaring Henry has met expectations for the year, each signed off by the revolving door of bookrunners.

He’s the hardest worker you’ve ever known. You have a crush on him, sure, but even if you didn’t, you would still admire him. He’s diligent and patient, level-headed. He’s at least as smart as you, if not more. In every way, Henry King has exceeded your expectations. 

After work that day, you cry in your car. You haven’t cried since the time you watched Lacey torture a squirrel, and you witness it with interest and confusion. You’re not crying; crying is happening to you. Henry passes your car on the way to his. He pretends not to notice.

The next day, he asks you to lunch. You tell him no thanks. He does what you do: leans on your desk and stares at you for so long that you can’t ignore him, which is actually super annoying. You can’t believe he tolerates you. And since you’ve never taken no for an answer, neither does he. 

“I’ll pick you up and carry you out of here,” he says, nudging your shoulder. You’re always touching him but this is the first time he has touched you. Your face feels very hot.

You enjoy the thought of him picking you up and carrying you. You like how big and strong he is, even though he doesn’t seem to know that about himself, like a giant dog that thinks it can sleep in your lap without crushing you. 

He might be flirting with you. You’ve never actually been flirted with. You go to the copier to get your printouts. They’re still printing. Suddenly you’re swept up into his arms. You yelp.

“Put me down,” you say.

“Not until you agree to go to lunch with me.”

He holds you like you’re no heavier than a big client file. You know you’ll get in trouble if anyone sees you, but everyone’s at lunch. He takes you to the elevators. 

“Okay, okay,” you say. “We’ll get pizza.”

At lunch, in a roundabout, somewhat evasive way, he tells you what a good job you’ve been doing and that he appreciates your hard work. 

“Thank you,” you tell him, choking up but refusing to cry in front of him. “I really look up to you, so that means a lot.”

A silence follows that would be awkward to anyone else, but you understand that Henry needs these occasional pauses. For him, silence is not something that stretches across time but must be carved into it. He makes spaces for feeling, for thinking, for simply being in the company of someone else. 

These traits make your crush grow to unwieldy proportions, but after a year of trying to get his attention, you’re still just a plucky young apprentice to him. You don’t know anything about him. You’re close to giving up and you’re shocked by how badly that hurts. A boy you like doesn't like you. Your broken-heartedness is so clichéd, so conventional, so boring, and yet it’s the worst thing you’ve ever felt. 

One day, you tell Henry a story about a high school friend, nameless, and he says, “Wait, is this Michelle or someone else?” 

You stop dead in the middle of the sidewalk. He listens. He’s been listening.

“Yes,” you say, “it’s Michelle.”

Another time, waiting for a table at lunch, you accidentally stand in the path of someone making their way to the host station. Henry puts a hand on your lower back and guides you closer to him, out of the way. 

Every once in a while, he plucks stray hairs that cling to your wool coat.

A new thing begins to grow, so nebulous and strange you don’t at first allow yourself to acknowledge it. Over time, it becomes too big to ignore, and finally you look right at it: 

You love Henry King. 

You no longer just want his attention, you want him to touch you, curl up on the couch with you and watch TV each night, have children with you, grow old and die with you. It’s disorienting to know something in your head immediately but not actually feel it until a year later. You wonder what other things you have only thought but not felt. You wonder how long you have confused thinking for feeling.

[phaedraismyusername]

It's been forever since I've mentioned any books so I just wanted to shout out a few of my favourites from this year so far

Mapping The Interior by Stephen Graham Jones

This little 100ish page novella was my very first read of the year and I truly could not have started with better. It follows a 15 year old Native American boy who believes he sees his dead father walk through their house one night and his mission to recreate the experience to find answers. It's an exploration of grief and trauma, and whether or not these cycles can be broken

Horror Movie by Paul Tremblay

This is so not for everyone lol. I've read four of Tremblay's books this year and this is my favourite. This book is about a horror movie that was never released. A couple of decades later, after a few scenes and the screenplay made it onto the internet, the film has gained a cult following and the only surviving member has agreed to be a part of a much anticipated remake. This is told through excerpts of the original screenplay, the autobiographical audiobook by "the thin kid" and the current timeline of the film getting made. It's weird and uncomfortable and I ate it up in a single day

Sea Change by Gina Chung

Obligatory sad girl seeks peace entry in the list. Ro has just turned 30, works at a mall aquarium, and her boyfriend has just left her to go to Mars. Estranged from her family and sidelined from her best friends life as she plans her dream wedding, Ro spends her nights drinking sharktini's and generally making bad choices. The only light in her life is a giant Pacific octopus, Dolores, who she sees as her last real connection to her missing father, and what happens when Dolores is put up for sale. It's sad and melancholy but with a throughline of hope that slowly blossoms into what my heart needed to read lol

Siren Queen by Nghi Vo

I loved this so much. This book follows a Chinese American girl named Luli Wei as she breaks into 1930s-ish Hollywood and her journey to becoming a star as the monster known as the Siren Queen. I know that's a short summary in comparison but that's because the sale is absolutely in the vibes which are basically 'what if classic Hollywood was Faerie and make it sapphic' and if any one of those words appeal to you in the slightest then I beg you to try this one. I took out an American library e-card just to get my hands on this and it's best decision I've made all year. Please read it lol

Nothing to See Here by Kevin Wilson

This audiobook y'all. The book follows Lillian as she reconnects with her childhood sort of best friend from boarding school who has written to her begging for help with her politician husbands two children when their mother suddenly passes away. Lillian, living the life of the persistent down and outer, agrees easily, it's just for the summer and she can't turn down the money, after all how hard could it be? There's one little catch though, sometimes the kids burst into flames. When I say this audiobook broke my heart and then healed my soul I promise you I am barely exaggerating. I'm sure you could just read it and it would still be good, but Marin Ireland's narration brings so much heart to this story that I physically cannot bear to recommend it any other way lol. If you only listen to one book this year then this is the one it should be

[a-forbidden-detective]

Recently, Akira Amano’s “travelling” editor Yuta Momiyama had an interview and he talked about RKDD and AA and of course The Characters exhibition.

An excerpt.

On the question if editors and manga artists also talk about personal things.

It also depends on the case, but in the course of meeting with Amano-sensei, the specific title I saw recently may be mentioned in the meeting. For example, at the time of Ron Kamonohashi Ron’s Forbidden Deduction, Ms Amano watched overseas dramas, which was the trigger for (the) creation. In this film, detective Sherlock Holmes and crime king James Moriarty are deeply involved. Specifically, Ms. Amano was also influenced by the drama SHERLOCK (BBC) starring Benedict Cumberbatch, and also from “The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes” series starring Jeremy Brett. She said that she learned the image of reconnaissance (the act of surveillance and observation).

Hahahaha. Benedict Cumberbatch and Sherlock BBC. I knew it. Thank you Editor sensei for this confirmation.

“Kamonohashi Ron's Forbidden Deduction" was animated on TV and also recorded a hit. It's a work with a lot of fans.

It was probably me who consulted her half a year after the completion of “El Drive [ēlDLIVE]” and said, “Would you like to do a mystery next time?” However, at the stage of the story, I had no idea exactly what kind of mystery she would make or what kind of protagonist it would be. However, I thought that one of the great things about Akira Amano was the illustration, and when the visual of the main character Ron Kamonohashi was completed and I saw it, I felt that it's an attractive detective. According to Ms Amano, Ron has been a shut-in for 5 years, so he is not well-groomed and wears indoor clothes. However, when it comes to deduction, it is an image that his eyes shine with a super-detective inspiration. On the other hand, Totomaru Isshiki, a detective who belongs to the Metropolitan Police Department and a partner who speaks for Ron's deductions, can’t work, but he loves his job, so he wears a suit, which is a uniform, and shows his youth and motivation for work. That’s it.

It is also a highlight of various cases and events that occur every time in this work.

There are short cases, and there are cases that take time to unravel. … We discuss ideas such as setting of the possible locations roughly at a meeting, why the victim is like this, and what kind of a person the criminal is, etc. Together with Mr. Asami, we also discuss who and what produces the trick. Actual cases and criminal cases from the movies you have seen and heard may be talked about, but basically there are many discussions to make them not look like them. Instead of a case happening on the same level, the situation is scattered, and the characters, new culprits, and new people who are involved will appear.

[ineffable-opinions]

Fumi Yoshinaga is known for her big hits including Ōoku: The Inner Chambers, which depicts the rise and fall of the Tokugawa family in the world where the Ōoku becomes a harem of men serving the female shogun, Antique Bakery, a story about a bakery where only men work and What Did You Eat Yesterday?, a slice of life series focusing on a gay couple. 

Excerpts (emboldened - for my own benefit)

Ever since I was a little girl, Patarillo! has been my favorite, so I enjoyed reading stories about male and male relationships. I didn’t think of it as a homosexual story at the time.

However, when I was in junior high and high school, bullying was a social problem, and I thought that if I stood out, I would be bullied. So I tried my best to hide the fact that I was an otaku so that it would not be obvious. Although I read major popular manga to keep up with everyone, I tried to avoid talking about the manga I really liked outwardly.

I had friends who were otaku, but when I graduated from high school, not only me but also all of my otaku friends “mimicked” normal people by reading the atmosphere. I dressed as normal as possible so that I didn’t look like an otaku, and I didn’t join manga club. I would go to coterie events, though (laughs).

Since then, I have not been able to do anything other than creating fan-fictions, and I even went to graduate school to continue my doujin activities for as long as possible. During that time, various BL magazines sprang up. A friend I met through doujin activities became the editor of one of the BL magazines called Hanaoto. And the opportunities I have been given to be involved in it have helped me build the career I have today.

Also, at the time of my debut, the term “BL” was coined and there was an atmosphere in which the entire market was gradually gaining momentum.

At the time, it was seen as pornography for adult women. Although I was embarrassed in the sense that I was creating erotic manga, I had no special feeling about the fact that I was depicting male/male love stories.

[...]can easily broaden my imagination as to stories starting from “comradeships,” “master-slave” relationships or the kind of friendship that becomes too passionate and then turns into romance.

Nevertheless, although I debuted as a BL manga artist, it was not at all easy for me to draw many variations of romance.

Even though I was drawing BL, love is love. At that time BL was basically short stories, characters in manga met and fell in love each time. I was troubled by the fact that they were another kind of love stories after all. Also, due to the policy of the magazine, I had to include sex scenes, which was very difficult for me. So I tried to move to a general magazine soon.

About All My Darling Daughters

In this work, I straightforwardly express the feelings I have had since childhood, such as the oppression I received from my parents and the speculation that I could be happy without falling in love. I didn’t want to use manga as a means to convey my ideas, but I was conflicted because I had to touch on these feelings in the creation of the story.

Sayako, who has no romantic feelings for anyone

She is what we now call “asexual,” but I didn’t even know that category at the time. I think it is very important to be named and recognized. It has certainly made life easier for many people.

It all started when a friend said to me, “I pay my taxes, I take out the garbage on garbage day, and I live a decent life, so why should I feel as if the world is blaming me just because I am not in love?”

I nodded deeply at her statement because I too had been uncomfortable since I was a student because I was not passionate about love. I guess I had to go with the flow of society, where people who have never loved others are considered to be living a pitiful life. I have been skeptical that loving someone is the highest good. If I say, “I don’t want a boyfriend,” people say, “Don’t try to act tough!” so I had to pretend to want a boyfriend, which is too much of a bother (laughs). I felt like I was mimicking them all the time in my life.

Gay people

I drew my BL and other works thinking that gay people might read them. So when gay people read my works, they may think “this is different,” but I was careful not to make them feel that they were being denied. I thought it was still okay to be unrealistic, but I never wanted to portray them in a way that might give an unusual impression to the readers.

But Ono [in Antique Bakery] was in a way the only exception. I had no intention of making him a laughingstock, but I felt bad if I had given readers a mistaken impression about gay people by portraying him in a funny way.

I have a gay friend who reads my works. When I apologized to him for how I portrayed Ono, he said, “If you get angry at every little thing like that, you can’t live as a gay person,” which baffled me. At that time, I felt very sorry. Since then, I have been careful not to change the attitude mentioned above. As for the depiction of gay men, I am not really conscious of whether it is realistic or not.

I think there are not many male-female love stories that depict realistic dramas. Rather, I enjoy reading them while thinking, “How could this happen? ” or “I hope this kind thing really happens in my life.”

What did you eat yesterday? & serialization of it in the youth magazine Morning

At first, I presented the idea to the editor of a BL magazine, but that person didn’t respond well to it. In the context of BL, the relationship of the two who have already gotten together was not interesting. There is no description of sex, no indication that the two are growing closer. For the readers of ordinary BL manga, there is no part of the story they want to read.

The editor-in-chief of the gay magazine also contacted me politely and said, “It is epoch-making for a story like this to be published in a youth magazine like Morning, so please feel free to ask me anything if you have any questions.”

I was just drawing what I wanted to draw, which was not much different from what had been published in BL magazine, so the objective opinions made me raise my consciousness and feel horrified at the same time.

One thing I changed was that I made sure to draw the recipe and ingredient quantities properly because I received a postcard from a reader saying that she had made the strawberry jam that appears in the piece. Although I was able to make some adjustments to it in the aspect of cooking manga, I thought I couldn’t change much about the setting of the gay couple, so I continued the manga as it was. However, the editor-in-chief of Morning changed around the time I published the second volume, and when I greeted him, I was surprised to hear from him that Morning is a conservative magazine for middle-aged men.

expressing yourself in a place where many people would see your work & fear of hurting someone

Doujinshi is simple; people who want to read it read it, but that is not the case with commercial magazines, so I was worried in the beginning.

When I was young, I once told an editor that I wanted to draw a manga that didn’t stand out in any way, and he admonished me, “That won’t make for an interesting work” (laughs). As long as it is a concrete expression, it will definitely hurt someone. So, in a way, I gave up on that point.

I think I am probably in a kind of trance when I am drawing. I am outputting what I wanted to read and reading it myself, so there’s definitely an adrenaline rush. That kind of pleasure is what keeps me going with this job.

Changing world, changing manga

I think that the range of content that we can depict has become much wider. Even in terms of BL, there are now not only love stories with sexually explicit descriptions, but also love stories in which couples gradually deepen their relationship. Manga featuring argumentative but attractive girls are also popular. The number of stories that do not depict romance has also increased dramatically. But as a reader, I also love romantic stories.

The range of manga I enjoy reading has expanded and now I like manga even more than before. As a reader, I look forward to the future.

[quietbluejay]

Betrayer 1

SO the books opens with a flashback to Isstvan III it's after the battle oh hey Skane that name is familiar so is Kargos the writing very well captures the quiet feeling after the battle

Skane tells Kargos that it's Kharn Kargos: I'll be right over I do enjoy ADB's prose at least based on what i've seen of The First Heretic and some of his short stories, it's something he definitely started out with on a higher level than all the other HH authors my main issue with The First Heretic and why I haven't read it yet, is, at least in the sample, it's all spectacle no substance Betrayer doesn't really have that issue, I don't think

like I love Haley's prose, you all know I love Haley's prose, but Valedor and Pharos (Valedor especially) were a lot rougher one of the fun things about reading BL books is you can actually see writers progressing in terms of their craft okay we have a date! it's been a year since Isstvan V

throughout the heresy, the ultramarines consistently are the guys who get slaughtered, tortured, and sacrificed and this book doesn't beat the trend lol i mean okay it makes logical sense in a lot of cases but it sure does feel like they're the go-to if you want to show traitor forces winning it's what at least 4 books where this happens? anyways

we get a bunch more excerpts from Ultramarine ship commanders that are basically in the same vein as this

Chapter 1 and that sure is something "relative" is doing a LOT of lifting here and "modest" lorgar is peacefully watching the chanting and shrieking when he gets magnus interrupt

okay so i know BL has never been the most consistent about character descriptions but last I saw Lorgar's skin was described as "golden" (over in A Thousand Sons) here he's "pale" and "gold-inscribed marble" the narration is, hm, biased in favour of Lorgar here describing him as an "aesthetically pleasing statue" vs Magnus being "red-skinned heathen idol" "the sort worshipped by primitive cultures in less enlightened ages" "the red of flayed muscles" is a zinger of a description, but it's interesting as a contrast to lorgar being described as stone especially since as i recall later in this scene lorgar is the emotional one Lorgar is apparently very open with his emotions, the narration says as he thanks Magnus Magnus mentions that Lorgar (and the WB) have changed a lot since Isstvan Lorgar: from angron that would be a compliment, from you it's not

Magnus sensed all the death happening at Calth because of the waves in the Warp Lorgar: regrettable but necessary Magnus: hm

i didn't really pay attention to this the other times but…man imagine being magnus here he's stuck on this side whether he wants to be or not and Lorgar is the only other one who really "gets it" so to speak w.r.t. the Warp and Lorgar is Lorgar it also gets mentioned that Magnus' sheer psychic might sets Lorgar's teeth on edge

and the next thing Lorgar brings up is "do you feel shame that Russ broke your back over his knee" Magnus: drop it

yeah it's pretty clear as we go through it that Lorgar is sick of Magnus looking down on him Magnus asks Lorgar about Argel Tal the two of them bond about their top dudes being kind of broken Magnus still gets the ick when Lorgar calls the chaos gods "gods" Magnus: they're sentient warp storms anyways Lorgar needs Magnus' advice

lorgar conjures up an illusion of what happened Lorgar: Angron is dying a good chunk of this conversation is the two of them throwing barbs at each other Magnus: so? Lorgar: I'm going to save him Magnus: your loyalty does you credit but Angron's death would probably be a net benefit for the galaxy

and the Fidelitas Lex and the Conqueror get back into realspace there's some fun description here

I especially like "hungry iron children"

magnus: i'm about to watch you guys get splatted magnus: anyways where's the rest of your fleet lorgar: oh all over ultramar killing people so how is lorgar planning on completely neutralizing armatura rather than just raiding? "you've got a nasty surprise up your sleeve"

so anyways on this third read, i don't actually feel like the writing is being unfair to magnus it was pinging me that way originally I think because of the way it describes lorgar and his reactions but…it never actually gets into lorgar's thoughts or genuine feelings

the descriptions of him really give him more of an uncanny valley feeling

this is why i compare him to that baby alligator there is something very deeply wrong with him Magnus asks if he hates Guilliman that much, and Lorgar laughs

uh huh

like look at this (re lorgar's reactions)

Magnus: I'm worried about your sanity like Lorgar's features repeatedly get described as "divine" and he's consistently described as things related to stone, soil, metals it all kind of adds up to give a feeling of someone who looks like a human and even emotes like one…but whatever is going on underneath works differently

yeah, I don't think Lorgar is overly fond of Magnus, somehow I'm remembering now why I felt like this was Magnus bashing a bit

Magnus is right here, though I may not like him, but he's absolutely right

Magnus did make the wrong deals but…none of it would have blown up the way it did if Lorgar hadn't done what he did Lorgar just goes :) as Magnus loses his temper a bit

AU where Magnus snaps here I mean, I want to strangle Lorgar a bit rn

there should really have been more Chaos infighting Lorgar tells Magnus to watch them Magnus: I'm not really interested in seeing you guys get massacred

yeah that's not ominous at all

we get a description of Armatura as you can probably guess from the name - it's a planet devoted to production of war materiel and soldiers anyways it's uh got a LOT of defences

lorgar: do you hear the people sing lorgar: singing the song of the despair

"lorgar drew in a shivery breath" he's going a little mad with power here lorgar: every death weakens the veil between hell and reality he's laughing and weeping

i really get the feeling that even without Chaos, Lorgar would be, hm, off

a little magnus POV in response to this magnus tells lorgar that whatever he's doing, he's still about to get splatted by the guns of armatura "lorgar looked back towards the black heavens"

lorgar: did you just call to insult me also lorgar: has been throwing a lot more insults

and a giant ship shows up out of a warp rift surprise!

yeah so like how exactly did Lorgar get three of these monstrosities built Gloriana class are hard enough to get built I'd imagine this is one of ADB's weaknesses imo sometimes, he's good at writing stuff that looks dramatic but when you poke at it it…kind of doesn't make logistical sense

also there's another checkmark for Lorgar being just as much of a drama queen as literally everyone else in this family and now time for our main characters to enter the scene

yess it's Argel Tal and Kharn hanging out on the Conqueror

that's a fun little touch

one thing this book is doing really well is in its figurative use of language to describe people the Nails are bothering Kharn right now

Argel Tal (who has not yet been named) asks about it "with rancid empathy" a big reason his use of language is so effective is because of the unusual descriptors he's using i'm a big fan of this, this is something i like to do when writing poetry, so it's nice to see other people use it empathy is pretty much never described as rancid there were a few other phrasings we've passed already that were like this but i don't want to scan through everything to pick them up again Argel Tal grips his shoulder (presumably in sympathy), which is described as "unwelcome"

now for Argel Tal's description

Argel Tal gets some pretty evocative descriptors too bleeding to death, graverobbing he echoes Magnus' thoughts about Armatura and their certain deaths a billion soldiers on armatura that is a Lot

to be continued

[maipareshaan]

Adam Lanza School shooter having dreams about school

-Adam Lanza youtube video (Pointless) CulturalPhilistine The Movie (Part 1/6)

'I . . . I actually have a lot of dreams about school. It’s strange but I still dream about middle school and, well, not my middle school but … I don’t know, I, I always, you know, that sense that you have in a dream when you actually know something, tha-the environment I’m in, I just know it’s middle school or high school or something like that but usually middle school.'

-Adam Lanza Youtube video Strange Dream #1: Beyond Dreams [sic] Door Is Where Horror Lies

Adam Lanza dreams about not doing something he was supposed to do in school and being put in jail. Escaping to be then be put through an obstacle course which he must ride in a tricycle and the person who is most entertaining will be allowed to be free from prison. The crowd is cheering except for one dude who says he sucks. He thinks he is going to win but then wakes up.

Excerpts from the video-

'~Dreamt on the lovely morning of 9/20/2011.

'I just woke up about ten minutes ago and I had a strange dream so I thought I would explain it. The background was basically, long story short was, I was in high school and I wasn’t doing what I was supposed to do and told the authority figures to fuck off and I got imprisoned.'

-Adam Lanza youtube video Strange Dream #2: Which side of the door, again?

He is talking about a dream he had of high school but not his school like a fictional layout of a school, where there was an assembly about how awful he is, he then got bullied by the principal and a teacher. He also is very assertive and defends himseld in the dream. He also takes plans to withdraw but is thwarted and also tries to escape from the school when a teacher starts mocking by being a barrier between him and the door but he is able to get past her and leave school.

Some excerpts from the video-

"~Dreamt on the lovely morning on 10/5/2011. Yes, the principal spoke to me in pseudo-iambic pentameter. Haters be hatin’. I’m back with another strange dream description … although when I woke up, I didn’t think “What did I just dream?” I thought, “That’s exactly how I feel” even though I guess the other one sort of applied in that sense too, but anyway .. . This part of the dream, I didn’t go through, I just knew it has the background. Apparently, I had been at a high school and the previous day there had been a … an assembly about how terrible of . . . [laughter] there’d been an assembly about how terrible of a person that I am. And .. . everything like that and how much everyone should hate me. And so, the next day I came in — into the school of course it, again it wasn’t my real high school, it was a fi-fictional layout along with fictional people. And I went up the stairs thinking how much I hated everything about the placeand entered a hallway, and wouldn’t you know there’s the principal walking down the hallway, he sees me. The principal comes up to me and grabs me and says: “Hi there, Smig,38 I wanna talk to you for a minute.” And I say that I just wanna go to class and I don’t want any trouble. Basically, I was saying that kind of thing. And . . . he said, “No, I wanna know what you thought about yesterday’s assembly?” And I basically expressed that it was . . . just slander and uh . . . that he was just being a jerk. Andhe — and he was saying, “I don’t like your attitude” or something like that; “Why don’t you come with me to my office?” and he was pulling me down the hallway, down to his office where there were some other students and there was a bench and he said, “Wait here, I need to deal with some other students first.” So I waited there, and he went into his office. And I had a short conversation with another student I think, and um, I entered the principal’s office intending to get . . . intending to withdraw immediately and there were a ton of students in there for all manner of reasons. I said to him that I wanted the withdrawal papers because I was going to be leaving that second, and he was mocking me, and he was skirting around the issue."

"So I started running down the hallway, and this is probably one of only . . . maybe at most, five times in my life that I’ve had this happen to me, but I was running in slow-motion trying to get out of there. And there were — at the end of the hallway, there was some teacher opening — holding the door that I could leave out of, open. Trying to mock me. And they were closing it and opening it again and closing it and opening it again..."

"...It’s pretty funny when you think about that dream … you would expect someone of my personality to be dreaming about how horrible … other students were to me and that I was being bull — that I had nightmares about being bullied as a child. But I never was bullied by other students. And in my dream, I had nothing but sympathy for the other students, in real life the bullies are the adults. Who would try to … impose culture?"

"And so of course in my dreams, I have nightmares about things like my parents, or school, or the police, or government, or really anything like that. Anywhere where I’m a child and there are adults around."

-Youtube video 'Done with Youtube'

I’m not lying, I actually do have these dreams, it’s just that the reason I’m posting them at all is not so much as a description of a strange dream as a description of what I feel. And it’s, and about that, it’s not that, I would be fine if one aspect of culture like school were removed. The reason why I have nightmares about school and my parents and all of those things are because they represent what culture is. I’m opposed to all of culture, to the extent that I oppose language itself.

-Youtube video 'Strange Dream #3: .. . Door'

Adam Lanza dreams of getting in trouble at the library, being wrongfully accused bcz he accidentally left with someone else's assignment, being told he is horrible, defending himself, getting beaten then reacting with violence and being told he's a brutish criminal and the he defends himself and rants about how adults are the bullies.

"~Dreamt on the beautifully gloomy afternoon of 10/15/2011. This Strange Dream description series seems to have taken on the form of “this dream I had illustrates how I feel,” which is fine with me because that’s more fun than just strange dream descriptions. Anyway, this dream st-started with me in a secondary school library. I was photocopying or copying something, and it was right before the last class of the day, so I finished what I was doing, and I was about to leave the library, and … I had two homework assignments that I’d completed on the counter in the library. I picked them up and some adult there told me that I couldn’t do that, that I had to — I don’t know what they were telling me to do. And I said, it’s fine, they’re mine, I just need to get to class. And the adult followed me out and halfway through the library they stopped me and a couple of them were inspecting my papers. And it turned out that only one of them was actually mine and one of them belonged to someone else. Heh, this seems to be a recurrent theme but … I can’t remember that actually ever happening in my life, I don’t know why I keep bringing that up. But I guess because it’s a way for them to say “look at how horrible of a person he is” because that’s what they started to say about me.

I said, um, well, I didn’t really say much of anything while they were chastising me, the adults left and came back with a bill. It had included hundreds of dollars for various things like the photocopying but there was a $2,500 fine for … leaving the library without following the proper procedure or something like that. I said how ridiculous it was and I was going to contest it to the best of my abilities and that really riled them up. They started … yelling at me and I eventually just said fuck this, I’m dropping out of school, do whatever you want. I started to get up to leave but one of them chased me and pushed me up against the wall and was screaming at me about how horrible of a person I was. And something I said must’ve provoked them into hitting me in the face because they did that eight times, and after the eighth time I slugged them — I slugged her in the face as hard as I possibly could and she backed off. And … started putting on a show of “oh I was just doing my job and this brutish criminal hit me” and I was saying, I was, I was shouting to everyone in the library: “oh come on, she’s, she hit me in the face eight times and I hit her once, how can you possibly say that I’m the criminal here?” And I put on my Tyler Clementi spiel about adults being the ones who bully children, not other children and I eventually just left the library … and the dream ended shortly after that."