#this is extremely important to me /lh

[asterionstarryeyed]

COULD THAT BE AN INTENSIFYING 'WICKED' I SPY??????

[kindahoping4forever]

Via Luke IG Story

[srjlvr]

[ LET’S GET MARRIED ! ] — lhs <3

PAIRING. lee heeseung!student X femreader!student !

SYN. the uni is giving away free dorms! under one condition, in order to save your desperate broke ass student’s life, you’d have to get married. and who’d be the lucky person to marry you if not your childhood friend? no feelings involved of course!…..right?

GENRE. he fell first but she fell harder, basically being in denial for feelings at first, childhood friends to a married couple, fluff fluff fluff !

WARNINGS. mentions of getting married(obv), rest of enha and lesserafim’s yunjin & chaewon are in it too, mentions on having kids(no, there will be no kids here its nothing serious!!), mentions of food, being broke because of uni student life. (pls do lmk if i missed something!) || NOT PROOFREAD AND VERY POORLY WRITTEN!!

WORD-COUNT. 5.1k+ (damn!)

NOTE. this is me being extremely sorry for not continuing my heeseung smau by releasing a heeseung oneshot yay!! i actually got the inspiration from HAPPINESS (one of my fav kdramas!) please leave some feedbacks!! i really wanna know what you thought about it<3

when you were younger, you’ve made a wishing list to you in the future, as soon as you turn an adult.

three important wishes were ;

first, never go broke while being a uni student.

second, never get married before the age of 25.

third, never ever fall in love with your best friend since childhood, aka lee heeseung.

first one is already being a huge failure. younger you would be definitely disappointed in uni student you, not that you care that much, but being a broke student sucks.

“my parents are literally about to kick me out, i get that, i’m a 22 years old uni student who’s still living up their asses, they probably want some peaceful and quiet life” you smacked your head over the lunch table, both of your friends looking at you concerned.

“maybe it’s time for you to pay for the dor-“

“never! yunjin, tell her how broke i am”

“she has like 1 dollar in her bank account, she’s still taking loans from her parents” yunjin nodded and you rolled your eyes.

“you didn’t have to go that far”

“oh i did”

“oh i know! what if you just start working?” chaewon raised her voice a bit.

“i have no time!”

“excuses excuses blah blah blah” she mocked you.

“look at heeseung for example, he works in a part time job at the convenience store right next to uni” yunjin pointed out.

you searched through the lunch hall and found the one person you’ve been looking for, lee heeseung.

you’ve been stuck to him ever since childhood, with your mothers being the biggest best friends you’ve ever seen, it was pretty hard to not see him every day in your young days.

both of your mothers even got pregnant at the same time, and gave birth around the same time, you’re two days younger than him.

your photo album is full with pictures of you and him, and so are the hanged photos on your house wall.

your mother and his mother were your biggest shippers, forcing you both to hug each other and even wear matching clothes.

your elementary school memories are filled with heeseung next to you and the whole class shipping you two.

highschool days weren’t better either, guys who wanted to try a move on you were always so scared of heeseung, they were so sure you and him are dating, with the amount of glares they got from him it was really hard to think otherwise.

your highschool crushes rejected you, always giving the excuse of not wanting to be in a relationship, hiding the fact that heeseung warned them that if they’ll say yes he’ll make sure they never see a daylight again.

he was joking, really. he’s not the violent type, and he couldn’t really explain why was he feeling so jealous whenever he saw you confessing to a guy who isn’t him.

heeseung got used to watching you from afar and protecting you, and you got used to search him everywhere you go even in crowded places and having his company ever since childhood.

“hee!” you called and waved at him, he waved at you back with a smile on his face.

“i swear if i didn’t know both of you were childhood friends i would’ve think you’re a married couple or something” chaewon rolled her eyes and you scoffed.

heeseung continued his way to his usual table with his friends.

“thinking about ways to confess your love to her?” jake smirked and heeseung shook away his thoughts.

“hm? who?” he asked.

“it’s obvious who! don’t play dumb come on!” sunghoon playfully pushed the older one.

“we’re talking about Y/N! everyone in uni are talking about you, even those who know nothing about the two of you” jay remarked.

“there’s nothing between us, we’re just friends” heeseung shrugged.

“and i’m queen elizabeth” sunoo tsked.

heeseung rolled his eyes and began to eat, “you know, even if i did have a crush on her, why would she even accept my confession?”

“ohhhh~” his friends teased.

“it’s kind of obvious she likes you, we’ve watched her ever since we became friends with you, and the way she looks at you is just different” jungwon shrugged and ni-ki nodded.

“she’s always searching you in a crowded room, as if you’re her guardian angel and she only needs you in her life in order for it to be perfect” ni-ki then stole a few bites of heeseung’s meal.

“hey! not cool” heeseung scoffed and ni-ki giggled.

“it’s not bad to have a crush on your childhood friend, you know?” jake smiled, “sometimes all you need is a miracle” jay added.

“hey, let’s go on a work search for yo-“

“no no no yunjin not you too!!” you sobbed, “i have no time to work and i need to search for the cheapest dorm, a one i can actually afford as soon as possible”

“why don’t you just go and ask heeseung for help” chaewon shrugged.

“it’s not that easy, i don’t want him to worry about it too much, he works hard for his money too” you pout and they nodded.

“by the way! how’s the money for the uni dorms is going?” jake asked heeseung who was busy fighting with ni-ki over his food.

“i’m just a few shifts away from getting enough money, i’ll ask y/n to become my roommate as soon as— what?” he noticed his friends looking at him.

“y/n and you? being roommates?” sunoo teased.

“hey, me and y/n spent all our childhood together, my house is her house and her house is mine, it has been like that for a while” heeseung sighed and they all nodded hesitatly.

“still, you said y/n’s parents told you about her not being able to pay for the uni dorms, are you really willing to pay it all?” jungwon asked.

heeseung shrugged and took a bite from his food again, “it’s either that or she’ll get kicked out by her parents”

“you really are her guardian angel” ni-ki whispered.

“good morning! you have afternoon classes today right?” your mother woke you up with a smile smeared all over her face.

“mhhm” you hummed, still trying to adjust the bright sunlight that hit your face.

“i need you to bring some medicine for ms lee! she’s been sick and i bought her some things” your mother helped you to get up and shoved you a bag, “here”

“can you please just let me get—“

“you can get ready at theirs! quickly quickly go!” she pushed you outside of your house. damn, she really does hope you’d get out as soon as possible.

she was right though, heeseung’s house is your house, and your house is his. you have a few clothes and even a toothbrush at his house and he has the same at yours, getting ready there was never a problem to you.

a walk to their house is even less than 5 minutes so you weren’t worried about someone from your neighborhood getting a jumpscare and thinking you’re some kind of a zombie.

you took out the keys and opened the door, heeseung was sitting in the kitchen and eating his breakfast.

“don’t ask, been a rough morning, where’s mom by the way?” you asked him and he pointed at her room. you got used to call his mom your mom too.

you saw her sleeping so you left the bag and the medicine next to her, leaving a note saying good morning and instructions of how to take the medicine, as if she doesn’t know all of that.

“you have afternoon classes too?” you asked heeseung while getting ready. he was in his room, lying on his bed while playing some games on his phone.

“not really, i don’t have any class today” he chuckled.

“since when don’t you have any classes today?”

“ever since i decided that im too tired to go to uni”

you rolled your eyes and threw one of the pillows at him, “don’t be stupid! get up and get ready to go!”

he giggled and shook his head, “i’m joking, i took evening classes for today”

you pressed your lips together and nodded, you don’t know why but hearing him giggling always made your heart skip a beat, but you don’t have any feelings for him, like, at all. right?

afternoon classes started and before you knew it, it was already lunch time.

“y/n! you won’t believe it!!” chaewon shout.

“what is it?” you shout at her back even though you were sitting right in front of her.

“i found you a solution! you can get a free dorm!” she shout back.

“what!” you shout.

“can you stop shouting! for god’s sake you’re literally a 1 cm away from each other” yunjin, who was covering her ears yelled.

you and chaewon shared an eye contact and froze. yunjin is so scary when she’s angry.

“continue please” she coughed and let chaewon continue what she had to say.

“it might seem crazy what i’m about to say,” chaewon sighed, “the uni is giving away free dorms—“

“no way omg omg omg please tell me i’m dreaming this is not happening right now right this is not real righ—“

“under one condition!” she cut you off and took her phone out of her pocket to read the terms.

“in order to get a free dorm, you have to have at least one option applied ;

one, you’re younger than 18. two, you’ve been scoring A+ on ALL of your exams and three, you’re between the ages 18-25 and got married, or engaged” she finished reading and turned off her phone.

“but chaewon, i’m not younger than eighteen” you complained and rest your head on your arm who was lying on the table.

“nor scoring A+ on ALL of your exams” yunjin added.

“thanks yunjin, i needed that”

“always here to help”

“then you know what’s left” chaewon smirked and you sat up, looking at her with innocent eyes.

“no” you let out.

“oh yes”

“i have no one to marry to” you argued.

“yes you do!” yunjin replied.

“i do not!”

chaewon and yunjin raised a brow and crossed their arms, “you don’t?”

as heeseung entered the uni entrance, you ran towards his direction and stopped in front of him.

“y/n why are you still here—“

“let’s get married” you said it out loud in front of everyone who was around.

your surroundings suddenly became quiet and everyone was staring at you two, starting to whisper and waiting for heeseung’s answer.

instead of answering he grabbed your wrist and dragged you out of the entrance into a place in the garden next to the uni.

the walk there was making you so nervous and anxious, what if you were a bit too much? asking your childhood friend to marry you just to get a free dorm? are you that desperate?

when he finally stopped, he let go of your wrist and cupped your cheeks, looking straight into your eyes.

“what did you say?” he asked, his eyes looking for any sign or answer from you.

“i said, let’s get married”

heeseung could’ve swore his heart skipped a beat because he for real felt like he died at that spot.

“let me explain!” you said before he could respond.

“the uni are giving out free dorms to anyone who’s between the ages of 18-25 and is married or engaged” you sighed.

heeseung let go of his hold and sighed, looking down and closing his eyes.

you really didn’t mean that genuinely, did you? something in him really hoped you did.

“hee?” you asked, biting your lower lips, suddenly feeling more anxious than before

“sure, let’s get married” he chuckled.

you broke your second main wish on your list.

heeseung was just a few shifts away from getting enough money to get the both of you a place to live in, he could have told you that too, but he chose not to.

only crazy people would agree to this idea, you were so desperate that you actually just asked him to marry you, and he guessed he was one of those crazy people, because he had no idea why he said yes.

he had other way, without marrying you, but something about the idea of marrying you made him feel excited.

“i knew it i knew it! only crazy people would agr— wait what” you blinked a few times after you realized his answer.

“i said sure, let’s get married” he smiled softly and you were about to faint.

“no feelings are involved….right?” you hesitantly asked him, hoping he wouldn’t agree with you.

instead, he nodded slowly and hesitantly, “no feelings involved”

you regretted that sentence so bad because the day after, when he kneeled on one knee and held a ring out for you in front of everyone and proposed to you, your couldn’t lie to yourself anymore, you actually broke your third wish on your list a few years ago, you were in love with lee heeseung for years.

“y/l/n y/n, i have loved you ever since i can remember, i watched you grow up and grew up with you as well, i got used to being with you 24/7, i can’t see the rest of my life without you in it, will you make me the happiest man alive and agree to marry me?”

even though it was an act(according to you), it felt so real to the point where you cried and sobbed so badly, while putting on the ring he bought for you less than 24 hours ago.

it wasnt planned. the proposal wasn’t planned at all.

the plan was that you and heeseung will go to the uni secretariat and request an application for the free dorm since both of you are engaged now.

heeseung had no reason to put on this whole show and show everyone that you’re now engaged. you have no idea why he did it, and instead of getting angry at him, you fell in love with him even more.

it felt wrong, it felt not right.

but you didn’t care, you always knew your feelings for heeseung were somewhere deep inside your heart. you tried to push them away all the time, because there was no way your childhood friend, the popular boy in your highschool, the kid who grew up with you, had feelings for you.

you tried to deny your feelings but now you realized thrre was no use anymore, so you let yourself love him as much as you can.

it wasn’t the desperation that lead you to ask him to marry you, because then you’d ask literally any other guy, it was your pure love to him, to the guy who was always there for you when you needed him.

“heeseung! explain what was that!” his six other friends gathered in a circle, surrounding him and not letting him go.

“what was wha—“

“you and y/n? married?” jungwon shout.

“have you gone crazy?” jake added.

“and she said yes! something is not right” jay joined.

“yesterday you told us you have no feelings for her!” sunoo remarked.

“you didn’t even believe us when we told you she’s obviously in love with you” sunghoon tsked.

“something isn’t sitting right to me” ni-ki gasped.

“explain now!” they all said at the same time.

“calm down!” heeseung coughed, “i’ll explain to you everything later”

by later he meant after classes, at his house, together with you and your friends yunjin and chaewon.

“yunjin, chaewon” heeseung nodded at your friends.

“lee heeseung” they glared at him.

“come on! both of you knew about it even before” you pleaded.

“doesn’t change the fact that he’ll be stealing you from us now” they rolled their eyes.

“i’m still so confused” ni-ki tried to quicken everyone and get to the point.

“me and y/n are getting married—“

“yeah no shit sherlock” sunghoon cute him off and heeseung glared at him.

“anyway, y/n would you like the explain why?” he turned to you and smiled.

“the uni is giving away free dorms to married couples between 18-25 so—“

“you decided to get married to get a free dorm” jay finished your sentence.

“have you gone mad? heeseung worked his ass to get enough money to get the dorms for the bo— mhhhhmmm!!!” sunoo roamed but jake covered his mouth before he could continue.

“sunoo!!” jake coughed and turned to you with a smile, “don’t mind him he’s been stressed from work and uni lately”

the rest of you giggled awkwardly and tried to ease the atmosphere.

after you yunjin and chaewon left, the boys stayed with heeseung, looking at him with concern.

“what?” heeseung looked at them back with his bambi eyes.

“i don’t know hee, it feels like….she’s kind of using you” sunghoon spoke, jay slapped his arm and he whined.

“he’s right though, marrying you only to get a dorm is quite crazy” jungwon nodded.

“he’s even crazier for actually agreeing to all of this” ni-ki said and jake shushed him.

“ni-ki is right, i am crazy, i have no idea why i said yes but she wasn’t forcing anything on me” heeseung shrugged, “besides, i’ve liked her for so many years so—“

“ah ha!! we knew it!” they all said at the same time and heeseung sighed. what have he got himself into?

after everyone left, heeseung texted you, asking you to meet him in your usual spot.

you got ready and for the first time, you took a while to do so.

you stared at yourself in the mirror a few times and even checked different outfits. this has never happened to you ever before, especially not when you knew that you’re going to see heeseung.

heeseung saw you at your worst, why are you dressing up for him now then?

“i must be crazy, crazy crazy!” you shook away your thoughts and got out to meet your soon-to-be-husband.

“hee!” you saw his back facing you and as soon as he turned around you froze.

did he dress up for you too? why does he look so breathtaking suddenly? his bambi eyes match the rest of his beautiful features on his face so much, you’ve seen this man grow up, you know every detail about his face and you couldn’t explain why it was so sudden that you got caught by surprise because of his beauties.

shaking away your thoughts, you walked closer to him and smiled.

“hey hubby” you grinned.

“hubby?” he asked.

“a new nickname for my soon-to-be-husband” you chuckled and he nodded.

“i actually thought about something,” he turned to you, “our parents will figure it out sooner or later, should we tell them the truth or—“

“no, let them believe we’re getting married without any reason other than being in love”

you have no idea why you just said that. but you hid your face as soon as you realized what just came out of your mouth.

heeseung felt too flattered and suddenly didn’t know what to say. you keep on making him speechless.

“ahem,” he cleared his throat, “you do know that they’ll probably rush out things and even take the wedding plan to their own hands“

i don’t care, i’d like to marry you and spend the rest of my life with you as soon as i can. is what you wanted to say, but you couldn’t bring yourself to do so.

“y/n?” he asked. he noticed you were too deep in thoughts and waited for you to come back to sense.

“i’m aware” you nodded, “i’ve also got a text from the uni, we’ll be getting our dorm in the next week, so we should start preparing”

heeseung nodded and looked at you. you were suddenly feeling so nervous and shy to share an eye contact with him, so you broke it as he just kept staring at you and taking in your beauty.

“hey y/n” he said, “hm?”

“i don’t mind marrying you and spending the rest of my life being married to you”

you looked over him and he had the genuinest smile you’ve ever seen.

it felt like the world had froze, and the snow that was falling suddenly stopped, it felt like it was just the two of you in this whole world.

“YOU’RE GETTING WHAT?” your mother yelled.

you and heeseung planned a dinner with both of your parents, to announce the big news.

things became quite awkward between the two of you, ever since your last encounter with him you could barely face him.

his sudden confession freaked you out and the only thing that came out of your mouth was “oh, okay” in the most dry way ever.

you wanted to tell him you feel the same, you wanted to tell him that you’ve been in love with him ever since forever. but one moment that caught you off guard ruined your chance.

you were stupid, stupid and idiot. heeseung probably thinks you hate his guts now.

heeseung in the meantime felt like he was breaking apart slowly. oh, okay?? that’s all you had to answer?

he felt dumb, he felt hopeless. the confession was completely out of the blue and unplanned, your beauty hypnotized him and he was so mesmerized by you that the words just came out of his mouth naturally.

what if you hate his guts now? what if he made you uncomfortable? what if you’ll regret it the last minute because you weren’t feeling the same about him?

all of those questions were eating him alive, and you didn’t help either. each time he came up to you, you were suddenly in rush and told him you have to go, it was breaking him inside slowly.

the dinner was one chance to finally talk with you again.

“married, mom. we’re getting married” you repeat what you already said a few seconds ago.

“when? where? how?” heeseung’s mother asked.

heeseung looked at you and smiled warmly, “it just happened, we’ve been together ever since childhood, it already felt like being in a relationship for so long, so we decided to marry each other” he chuckled and held your hand tightly, “to belong to each other until the day we die”

your parents looked at the both of you. you were sharing eye contact for so long, with heeseung smiling at you, looking deep into your eyes, and with you looking at him with nothing but pure love in your eyes that was making everyone in the room feel so jealous of you two.

“now kiss!” your mother said.

you and heeseung broke the eye contact and blinked a few times.

“what?” you asked.

“kiss then! i want to picture it and keep it in my photo gallery forever!” his mother added.

you were about to speak up until heeseung held your cheek to turn you to face him and it was only a matter of seconds until you felt his lips on yours.

it was your first kiss ever, your first time kissing someone, and it was his as well, but he lead you on so good that it made it look less awkward.

you were his first kiss. you, his childhood friend, stole his first kiss.

“we knew that it’ll happen one day!!” your mothers cheered, “we even have a whole wedding plan ready!!”

you and heeseung broke the kiss and shared an eye contact again.

you didn’t need to hear him say to know how much love he holds for you, and how he cherishes you so much.

and your eyes told him everything, they held the answers to all of the questions that bothered him. you love him as much as he loves you.

“i can’t believe you’re getting married, my little angels” your parents cried altogether which made heeseung let go of his hold on you and grab some tissues to wipe their tears.

“i love that ring by the way! heeseung you did a great job” your mother gave him thumbs up and he chuckled.

if only she knew that it was a ring he bought you in less than 24 hours and even rushed your friends to come with him and help him pick it only because he wanted his whole life to properly propose you.

it was a moving day already and your parents helped you pack every last thing, they even cried through the way, how could their princess leave them so fast?

“you can visit our house anytime!” you tried to comfort them.

“we’ll update you before that, we don’t want to catch you while doing the thing you know” your mother winked and you rolled your eyes, “mom!”

“i see you’re all packed and ready” heeseung came in to check on you.

“she is! take her away already!” your mother complained.

“not before you take this with you!” she went away for a few seconds and came back with a huge wrapped photo frame.

“don’t open it yet!! only when you get into your new house and get everything in place!!” she excitedly hugged the both of you and you nodded.

moving in was quite rough, you had a lot of boxes to unpack and organized, and you and heeseung never felt more awkward after the first kiss you shared.

you’ve barely spoke with each other and your friends were starting to get concerned.

“he told me he doesn’t mind marrying me and spending the rest of his life with me” you pout.

yunjin and chaewon shout and giggled, “girl! he’s more than in love with you!! he’s lovesick!!” they both said.

“what did you answer then?” yunjin asked.

“i told him okay” you smacked your head on the table.

“no way” chaewon gasped.

“yes way” you whined.

“you’re stupid!!” they both smacked you.

“then!!” you shout, “we had our first kiss on dinner in front of our parents” you whispered that part.

“what did you say? couldn’t hear you” chaewon said.

“oh she said that they shared their first kiss on dinner with their— YOU HAD YOUR FIRST KISS WITH HEESEUNG??” yunjin’s eyes widened.

“what happened after that?” chaewon asked curiously.

“we just finished dinner, and now we barely even talk” you sighed, “each time i see him i’m just blushing and running away, i can’t face him!”

“you have to!! you’re moving in soon!!” yunjin argued and chaewon nodded.

“it’ll be the death of me” you sobbed and they chuckled.

you were right at first, but slowly and surely heeseung made a joke and both of you got back to normal in no time, as if nothing happened between you two.

you even helped him organizing his closet and his room, and he did the same.

after a long day you and heeseung finally laid down on your now shared sofa.

“it’s been a rough day” you sighed.

“should we order something?” he suggested and you nodded immediately. you ended up ordering your favorite food.

“let’s open up the picture!!” you said and grabbed the picture your mom gave you earlier today.

you and heeseung both unwrapped it together and revealed an old picture of you and heeseung hugging each other with a huge smile on your faces.

“look at us then and look at us now” he giggled.

both of you hanged the picture right above your sofa and kept staring at it for a while.

“hey hee,” you spoke, “yeah?”

“i wouldn’t mind marrying you and spending the rest of my days with you too” you turned to him, “until the day i die”

“is that your way of telling me you love me too?” heeseung froze for a second. you caught him off guard for the countless time already.

although he understood very clearly your feelings after you shared your first kiss, hearing your words made his heart beat fast.

it was a confirmation for him that all of his feelings for you were actually mutual all this time.

instead of answering his questions you grabbed his shirt and kissed him.

he put his hands around your waist and pushed you closer to him, holding you tightly as if he’s too scared to let you go.

breaking off the kiss was hard, but the lack of oxygen was kicking in, you pressed your foreheads together, still with your eyes closed.

“does that answer your question?” you giggled and you felt him smiling.

“i don’t think so, i need a bit more of it to feel certain” he teased and you tsked.

“i don’t need to be in a relationship with you to feel certain about my feelings and my willingness to marry you, i want to spend my life with you, i love you” you said and pecked his lips.

“i love you too, y/n” he pecked your lips again and it suddenly got into a fight between you two about who pecks the other more, until it ended up in a long, deep kiss.

“so let me get this straight. you and heeseung had been in denial for many many years and manipulated yourself into thinking that you don’t like each other at all at all, then when y/n’s desperate and broke ass heard of a chance to get a free dorm by getting married, she went up to you, heeseung, and asked her to marry you, you agreed to the proposal because at one point you stopped lying to yourself and realized you’re actually lovesick, and the rest is history” ni-ki finally breathed out after almost rapping this whole story.

“by history i mean y/n waking up from her denial and realizing her feelings to you” he added.

“yes, exactly” heeseung nodded and you chuckled.

you were sitting together with your friends on one table, yunjin and chaewon who were already aware of the story added a few notes here and there as ni-ki summarized your whole story.

“this is a story to tell your children” jay smiled and the rest nodded.

“we’re not planning to get pregnant anytime soon, we didn’t even have a wedding yet” you sighed.

“you never know y/n, you never know!” sunoo slowly nodded.

“why did you say that as if you went through something familiar” jungwon teased.

“you never know y/n, you never know!” sunghoon mocked sunoo.

“that was a good one!” jake laughed with him.

“children, literal children who found themselves in uni somehow” you sighed.

“at this point we won’t even need to have any children when we have them” heeseung agreed with you.

“it doesn’t matter, as long as i’m with you” you smiled and pecked his lips.

“get a room you two will you!”

PERM TAG-LIST ; @sungwhoonz @ohdudehesflirting @unlikelysublimekryptonite @deobiis @manooffline @miumiuoi @in-somnias-world @lovelovelovebts @filmofhybe @wonbinsnovia @daegutowns @aurumiee @soobywon @dhriti-stories @ariadores @firstclassjaylee @watamotee33 @moons-v (bold means cannot be tagged)

••• copyright © srjlvr all rights are reserved.

[burningcheese-merchant]

How on earthbread do you ship BurningCheese. Im gonna try to not judge you. This is 80% a non-rethorical question. like genuinely how do you ship them?? /lh

I was wondering when someone would come ask me this lol. It's ok though, you can be honest, I can feel you narrowing your eyes at me through the screen 👀

I could honestly go on for a REALLY long time about why I ship BurningCheese/GoldenSpice. But I'll try to distill/narrow down my thoughts the best I can so my answer isn't longer than the Bible

I adore the enemies to lovers trope and hero/villain pairings in general. I did long before Cookie Run and I will long afterwards

I like how they complement and contrast against each other, aesthetically + personality-wise + backstory-wise

I love how they interact with each other. I love how they talk and snipe at each other. Golden Cheese's frustrated yet unyielding confidence and wit VS Burning Spice's brash, raucous excitement is fun to see. (The back-and-forth they have during their fight in episode 6 is dangerously close to how I've written them in my fics, even before the episode came out. So technically, in a way, my fics have been canonized lol)

It's fun imagining them together in different ways. A one-sided crush/obsession on Burning Spice's part is fun in a dark way (my Yandere Spice). So is a mutual love and respect between them. Main canon for me is a slow burn romance and a slow redemption arc for Spice alongside it. I also have an AU where Golden corrupts and becomes a Beast herself, and they become an evil villain couple. I have another where Spice doesn't get better and Golden doesn't get worse, they just have the standard forbidden love affair that they hide from the world (the latter out of fear of judgement, the former just so no one can try to keep them apart). I've got a million story ideas with them. You can do all sorts of things with them imo. And I think it works because of how they bounce off of each other. Put them in different situations and see how their relationship changes/adjusts/adapts, see if love can exist and how

I like their size difference. Spice is significantly taller and wider than Golden and it's really funny to see lol

The way they and their relationship/dynamic parallel actual Egyptian and Indian mythology (the latter in particular) is absolutely unreal

Not kidding, I can go on about the symbolism and allusions and references forever. I could write an actual paper on it. How can a ship go THIS hard

Come on, don't act like they wouldn't give each other a fantastic time in bed lmao

They follow each other around in my kingdom almost 24/7. Literally every single time I log in they're next to each other or one is trailing behind the other while they walk somewhere. If they want to be together that badly, I'm not going to stop them

They are literally the cycle of life and death, they have the single most important connection of all the Beasts and Ancients, one simply cannot go on without the other for together they make up the foundation of the goddamn cosmos

It actually all started with me and someone irl joking about Burning Spice having a stalker crush when the very first trailer came out. Then I went "haha that could be a funny fic". Then I wrote it and went "wait this is an interesting idea". Then episode 5 came out and I went "wait wtf does he actually want her??? He's acting like he does in my fic!!!" Then I wrote more and got even more attached to the one-sided attraction dynamic. Then I started imagining them in an actual, normal relationship and how that might pan out. Then I started writing stuff for/about that and I got extremely attached to that. Now they have a fully fleshed out relationship and they're married and have two kids, and I have a billion side stories and AUs, and any other ship involving either of them viscerally repulses me. I unironically memed too close to the sun and immediately fell straight down into BurningCheese hell (but it's ok, I like it here and I don't plan on leaving ever)

I can and I want to and no one can stop me

I still wrote a Bible, didn't I lol. BurningCheese/GoldenSpice is perfect in every way, they are my ride-or-die and you can pry the ship from my cold, dead hands. The end, roll credits

[project-sekai-takes]

i feel like a lot of characters have undexplored/underutilized angst. this post is going to be extremely biased™️towards my favorites, but characters like ichika, kohane, and all of more more jump really but especially minori and shizuku are who i'm talking about. i'm not saying that proseka should be needlessly slapping angst onto their stories just for shock value and fun because that's just pointless and not enjoyable to read; i just think that the angst these characters already have is usually underexplored by the fandom and game itself.

i know that ichika and kohane had the majority of their angst material covered/resolved in the main story (kohane also had vbs wl2 so it's probably covered there too but i havent actually reaad it), but i think we as a fandom should dwell on what they were like and what they were experiencing back then more often fr 🗣️. i think this kind of angst allows exploration of certain character aspects that are usually left forgotten or undiscussed. (bro ichikas closest friends left her with no real explanation so she she thought it was her fault and was extremely lonely because of it man can we talk about that please 😭)

minori is another example. i know mmjs overall story and her themes especially revolve around hope and not giving up, but c'mon she had her auditions rejected 50 times and she still kept going strong. that takes some serious passion, determination, and willpower, and i feel like that should be acknowledged more often because if i was rejected like that for at most 10 times i would have straight up folded and given up. minoris first focus and airis first focus both have a lot of minori struggle that i just never see talked about?? (read: "sorry we're not hiring your team because of that faceless amateur. we'll hire everyone else individually if you kick her out though 😁) its just a shame because its so important to her character and the angst potential is crazy!! (ok im sorry lmao)

shizuku also has a lot of angst material in early game (main story argument with airi, masking perfection, the entire thing with her old group in general) that i was really surprised wasnt featured in like...those angsty tiktoks and fanfics LMAO. i did end up finding some for her but the roots of the angst were mostly fanmade and not completely applicable to her character. i personally don't have any issues with making up tragic backstories/angst material for characters (in fact i love to see it and actively do it myself) but like the canon material is right there, there's a lot to work with already it doesnt have to be completely fanon lol /nm /lh

i know the rest of leo/need is probably also lacking in good angst content, but honami and shiho already got a ramble from me so they're on standby for now smh /lh. (airi and haruka might also be lacking but iirc airis the most popular mmj character and the recent haruka events have some good angst coverage so idk about their current standings). saki has a weird situation where her angst content definitely isnt lacking but most of the time its only used to fuel tsukasa angst. i don't actually think theres anything wrong with that because so much of his motivations were initially based off of her (wanting to be a star and making other people smile), but once it becomes only about him and has nothing to do with her, who is actually the one suffering, i just dont feel like it's used fairly. angstkasa is wonderful and all but saki is her own character :[

anyway sorry that was kind of an incoherent rant about my favorite characters, but i really enjoy angst and would absoultely love to see more depictions of it for the blorbos. thank you for reading o7

-🕊️

.

[newgenspgfan]

THIS IS EXTREMELY IMPORTANT.

not really LMFAO. i just wanna ask..

WHERE are the good quality pictures of modern rabbit??

i go on pinterest ALL the time, and my spg board is FULL of pins. i have approximately 2 good quality pictures of modern rabbit there. and when i found my second one, it felt like i actually hit gold, just to not find any again.

WHERE ARE THEY HIDING?? cause i can sometimes find pictures of modern rabbit, but theyre always pictures from really far in the crowd, OR they dont show her face. AND I WANT TO SEE HER FACE. even in official video recordings i dont see her too well!! it peeves me just a little!! (its okay if you take those pictures thats just not what i’m looking for)

and when i FIND a GOOD QUALITY picture it is ALWAYS, without fail, VINTAGE rabbit. like awesome. amazing. but id like to see her now, not a decade ago /lh (i’d like to clarify by ‘modern rabbit’ im talking about rabbit from now-2 years ago, not like 2020.) is there a reason for this??

if anyone could reblog and show some cool GOOD QUALITY pictures they found of her, that would be pretty cool. or maybe link me to a photographer?? or something?? anything. i need to build my collection.

[xx-slug-xx]

Gravity Falls just made me read Flatland smh

Can’t lie, my sci-fi and science based autism enjoyed it quite a lot

If you haven’t read it, I do recommend since it has SO many parallels between Bill and Fords relationship. The pdf is free if you google it! Really cool part of science fiction literature when it was developing, so it’s a good read on its own anyway!

Plus, the part that’s really important, it really gives us a better look at Bill’s home dimension, how Euclidia’s society operated, and why it was oppressive for Bill! I don’t think Flatland IS Euclidia, but it shares so many similarities that it’s got to be extremely close at the least!

If you can’t read old timey sci-fi literature because it’s confusing (it’s confusing for most people who don’t have science autism lmao and I’m not trying to make it seem like only smart people understand shit like that /lh). Let me know bc I’m dying to translate it so that modern brains can comprehend it! It’s so silly but also really cool and I’m having a great time!!!

[tinylongwing]

Outlining the essay I keep threatening to write when I should be doing work, as spurred on by me thought-dumping on today's LH subreddit song discussion topic (The World Ender).

Pt 1. Cobb Avery and the War of US Aggression

Pt. 2. "East of the river, on Grove Street" - Los Angeles history as it relates to the World Enders, through the early 1960s

Pt. 3. Chicanismo and the will to exist - the World Enders circa 1967 and beyond

I just. I have so many feelings. I am also NOT a historian or a sociologist or like... I have never lived in LA, I am not Latina, and I feel so out of my wheelhouse with this but I feel like it's important. Especially given some discussions I've had with various folks recently re: the use of the World Enders' name by a large number of fans who don't realize they are a majority-Latino gang that arose out of capitalist violence on their community.

All of the chapter titles there are EXTREMELY preliminary and will definitely change but it gives me a place to start. I guess this will be my summer writing project now.

[quackity1999]

AVIAN EVENT — # PENNED BY PROPHET.

WELCOME TO LAS NEVADAS! THE PROUDEST ENTERTAINMENT CAPITAL OF THE WORLD. SO INDULGE YOURSELF IN THE LAVISH LIFESTYLE YOU NEVER KNEW YOU COULD HA— . . shit. wait.

chk—!

WE APOLOGISE FOR THE DISRUPTION.

PRES. QUACKITY IS CURRENTLY UNAVAILABLE.

[ REGULAR PINNED. ] <- this is a link. click it /lh

↓ IMPORTANT INFO UNDER CUT. ↓

you rn: UHHHH BIG P WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?

hi hi hello its me!! prophet. aka the fella who's writing this blog :3 here's the details for the few weeks (and a half) ahead.

+ c!quackity is an avian. duh. which therefore means he's got instincts/habits/routines: preening, nesting, mating season, what have you. all that snazzy stuff. this event is mainly to depict what happens when quackity has delayed nesting for months at a time, and how his instincts take over when his body has simply had enough.

+ send in asks as usual! there will possibly be literate snippets in replies, but please . try to keep it short i Cannot manage lengthy stuff with the amount of interactions this blog gets <3 the tag for this event is pretty cut and dry: #avian event :]

+ while nesting, quackity tends to return to a lot of primal instincts rather than maintaining his usual business persona. he's in what he regards to be his safe space— where nobody can bother him or place expectations on him.

+ this also means that las nevadas is . . lacking in their main figure. charlie is probably trying his best to manage, but for the most part quackity's nation is unmanned. (any charlie responses will be located from quackity's office, whereas quackity's will be from his nest.)

[ for some backstory; quackity has been nesting his whole life. huddling up in an amethyst geode or literally building one himself, spending a good amount of time in there to preen and catch a break from the world. cool! swag! awesome! woohoo!

when he married schlatt, it became evident that nesting was considered a disgusting trait— and schlatt banned quackity from nesting altogether. upon his engagement to karl and sapnap, quackity was extremely apprehensive to the relationship in general, and thus he refused to partake in his instincts until he learned to trust them. they were the only people who had respected his nesting boundaries until that point.

until he himself decided it wasn't worth it. now running las nevadas, quackity hasn't given himself the time to slow down and return to some semblance of self-care since leaving them behind. hence his recent decline in behavior due to the fact his instincts are forcing him to nest. ]

FOR ANONS: all regular quackity plots and asks will be kept safe in my drafts. i'll have responses for you after the event ends. thank u for ur patience!

WITH ALL THAT SAID!!!!!! i hope u all enjoy. you'll learn a shit ton of this blogs take on avian culture as well as a Lot of q's genuine vulnerabilities. it'll be fun, i promise <3

if u read this far. ily — xoxo prophet

[vividroseinfatuation]

It’s insane I don’t have a girlfriend when I’m this pretty 🙄💕 /j /lh

Happy pride!! I almost didn’t get a drawing done this year, to be completely honest I have been feeling a bit melancholy about it this month, but I was eventually able to pull myself together draw this. Being openly queer is so extremely important me, it makes me who I am! I love being able to say I’m a genderfluid demirose lesbian, it feels so perfect, it feels so right. Nothing can take that away from me. 🧡🤍🩷

[saltynsassy31]

I see in the Magnus/Swerve/Burr ask you briefly mention Blurr/Skids

Tell me everything /lh

👁 👁

DFKJFKJDK

Oh god why do the eyes look so much creepier on my computer than my phone wth- Okay, okay. I actually had to sit down for this one cuz how I even got to shipping them needs explaining a little XD

Leaving it all under the cut cuz this got LONG baby

Just know that there is a short fic drabble at the end if anyone's curiouse <333

So I'm working on this AU for Blurr/Swerve, mainly focusing on their fan kid. And - without going into too much detail - Skids becomes their kid's surrogate's sire because Blurr doesn't become involved until MUCH later on in the story

Skids... doesn't like Blurr all that much for many reasons, and kinda fights him a lot. But also was the driving force to have Blurr be involved in the kid's life (DON'T COME AT ME!!! I have my reasons why I went this direction that will be revealed and make more sense when I finish the story)

Anyway, I'm talking with my friend about this au as she helps me figure things out. And we start to talk about "what ifs" scenarios. One of them was "what if Swerve died?" And for more important context, there are two points of which he could have died, one being before Blurr met their kid and one waaaay after they already became conjunx. Regardless, in both these scenarios, Skids ends up being a bit of a support system for Blurr (one more than the other though).

Skids comes to see Blurr as family, too. Ricky (the kid's nickname, btw) wanted Blurr in his life, and Skids was going to make that happen one way or another, or try at the very least. It takes a lot for Blurr to gain Skids trust, but he comes around to caring for him eventually. And when Blurr is struggling with the life of a single parent, just like Swerve did beforehand, Skids isn't going to just sit and watch (that is part of his trauma, after all whole ass other discussion focusing more on just Skids-). I could go on for hours about these two scenarios, but it requires context for the au, and I'd love to rant about it (and I'm weak and would totally answer questions about the au if prompted-), but then at that point I just gotta sit my ass down and finish the god damn fic gjsldlsd.

Anyway

Because of this conversation, we were sorta forced to talk about their relationship more. And it helped in the grand scheme of things because Skids is a permanent part of this family unit, and they have to get along for it to work in the end, you can't remove Skids from it. And he also would never budge.

During this conversation, my friend started to point out a couple neat things.

Blurr is a Wrecker and Skids is Spec Ops, the two groups have been known to have some rivalry between them. Even though neither really hold these titles to much regard, it's still a neat little parallel for their rivalry;

Following that train of thought: Wreckers are usually seen as brutes, forceful in their ways of fighting. While Spec Ops are more calculated and tactile. The main reason they fight, really, they have too different of styles despite doing somewhat similar jobs. But, although both have their reasons and skills to be in each group, they still end up being the opposite of what you expect of them. Blurr is more calculated in the way he carries himself and doesn't (often) resort to violence first. Skids, on the other hand, seems to almost punch first, ask questions later, and becomes extremely violent when people he cares about are involved.

They kinda just mirror each other perfectly! Though this wasn't the final straw for me to start shipping them, it was the seeds plantet.

No, the thing that cracked me and made me start shipping them was thanks to a drabble I wrote on a whim to my friend when we were in a cuddling mood. We were discussing what would it take for Skids and Blurr to cuddle just the two of them, because by then, the only times they'd be involved together would be for Swerve and Ricky.

And my brain came up with said drabble, and by the end of it I was like "Awe shit, I ship them, don't I?"

They won't become canon in the AU, cuz I really want to focus on platonic love being just as important and as strong as romantic love. I need to spread my propaganda of friendship not being lesser than other relationships! Because it seems like you can't have a devoted friend without it being "siblinds" or "romantic" in stories, so I gotta fill my own agenda... But I'm not immune to ship propaganda either, and I totally see the potential of the two, even though they'd only ever interact in very specific scenarios because the two both die before even getting the chance of a proper interaction (seriously, they only even co-exist in the same space during issue 27, and that was when Blurr talked to Swerve and then dipped, Skids never once talked to the guy-).

But I guess that's crack ships for ya, born out of what ifs and roleplays. Take your pick XD.

Idk where else to add this in, but I just think they'd have the funniest dynamic too. They butt heads constantly, but unfortunetly are more similar than they bargain for, which causes them to fight more. But they also (annoyingly so) care for each other. I don't think they'd like each other at first and only tolerate each other if they were forced in a room together. But slowly grow accustomed to the other's presence and - dare I say - enjoy it.

Anyway, I'm not cruel, so I'm going to share the drabble I wrote that converted me and see if it changes anyone else's mind too, lol.

~~~

Basically they were at Blurr's place, getting the place ready for a surprise party for Ricky. Swerve was having a day out with Ricky while Skids and Blurr stayed back to set up the place. Blurr had called Skids to oversee what progress had been made, make sure it would be something to Ricky's enjoyment.

Before that, however, Blurr had been feverishly preparing things the day and night before wanting it to be perfect. And it showed.

After zipping across the livingroom area finishing up the finer details, he moved to the kitchen where he felt slightly dizzy and leaned on the counter while trying to rub away the exhaustion.

Skids had just been watching, unable to keep up fully with Blurr's speed and relegating to fixing his own corner. He walked in after Blurr in the kitchen. "Hey, you sure you need my help? Seems like you've got everything handled." He laughed slightly as he looked back, stopping once he gave a good once over at Blurr, smile dropping to a concerned frown. "Hey, you good, man? You don't look so hot."

Blurr jumped slightly, cursing to himself for not hearing Skids walk in and quickly straightened himself. "Oh yeah, I'm good. Just a little tired, is all. Might have overdone it." He waved at Skids dismissively, putting on a strained smile.

Skids wasn't reassured, his frown only deepening. He seemed to flick over a couple options in his mind before he strode over towards Blurr with new found determination. He took the speedster's rist in a firm, but gentle hold and tugged him forward.

"Uh, what are you-"

"We got 2 hours before the party actually starts, an hour and a half before guests arrive. I don't even know why you called me over when you have everything basically set up already. You can take a small break, no one wants a tired host."

Before Blurr could protest, he was being shoved towards the couch. He grumbled and made move to get up, but his efforts were thwarted by a heavy hand over his shoulder. "Rest."

"You can't seriously be asking I take a nap in the middle of preparations-"

"I am. And if you're not going to co-operate, then I'll have to use force."

"You wouldn't."

The smug smile on the superlearner's face told otherwise. "Try me."

Blurr glared and considered his options carefully. But it seems his hazy processor was slower than he would have liked or was comfortable with, because despite his fast movements, it lacked the coordination to accomplish his goal of freedom. And, before he knew it, he was being trapped by strong arms that pinned him against Broad chassis. The moment Blurr tried to make his escape, Skids had tighten his hold on his wrist as it slid away from Blurr's shoulder and pulled him back until he slammed against Skids.

With that, the larger mech, humming satisfied with his catch, sat back down oncthe couch with a squirming Blurr. "You're only making this harder on yourself, zippy."

"Don't call me that." Blurr huffed, but it lacked the usual bite.

Skids moved to a more comfortable position for the both of them without releasing his hold on Blurr. Tight, but not painful. It was almost reassuring.

"You really aren't letting me go, huh?"

"Not a chance. So do us both a favour and rest up. Don't worry, I'll wake you when it's time."

Blurr let out a dragged out, exasperated vent which soon followed up with suppressed exhaustion. He let his helm thunk against Skids chassis as he off-lined his optics, a small smile ghosting his lips.

Sure, he'll indulged Skids on this one.

[satanic-foxhole-court]

(Full TSC spoilers, as in to the end of the book) The contrast of Jeremy’s biggest concern is caring for his team, making sure his queer inner circle are healthy, okay, having fun and passing classes vs. Jeans biggest concern is the literal mafia debt, serious major trauma, PTSD and learning how to live again is just perfect.

It shows really beautifully in Jeremy’s approach to helping Jean. Jeremy seeks to know, to get Jean to open up and admit what happened. And hey it eventually works. But in comparison that never happened with Neil. The foxes knew to not pry and because Neil was able to integrate into the foxes without being an issue like Andrew is that was okay. There was more concessions, understanding and leaving things be.

I do wish for many reasons Jean stayed with the foxes if only because they fundamentally get it. But at the same time no it wouldn’t work, they’re pack bonded and Jean sees them as something he can’t be apart of.

A quote that stuck with me:

“That’s not fair,” Jeremy said, and when Jean opened his mouth to argue, added, “to you or us. For someone who seems so sure of what he deserves, you don’t seem to give any thought to what anyone else does. You’re forcing us to hurt you without giving us any say in the matter.”

And yeah that’s why it’s important to shove Jean more than one might with Neil or Andrew. Andrew is violently firm with his boundaries, Neil says he’s fine when he’s not but he can cope under high stress environments and has worked on accepting help. Even if that help is calling Andrew, running and exercise (fun fact exercise is a great ptsd trigger management tactic, peak the anxiety to bring it down through physical activity).

Jean doesn’t have boundaries, will not speak up at any point when something upsets him, puts himself in harms way constantly because he doesn’t have any self worth. Understandable given what he’s been through. And for Jeremy to feel he can help he seeks to know to understand - which isnt helpful! And that’s acknowledged at the end of the book!!! (Nora I love you)

Jeremy wants to put it into context, he wants so desperately to be told what’s going on, why Jean has this reactions, that it’s important to talk. But for someone who’s learned to stop biting back, to be quiet to have no harm come to them? That’s not going to happen easily. Jean does give ground and I really appreciate seeing him set boundaries too gosh. Him saying what he will and will not talk about, reaffirming that again and again throughout the book is perfect. And for Jeremy, Cat and Lalia to respect those boundaries too, or mostly. There are points when I think they shove a bit much but this book isn’t about perfect responses. It’s a queer household taking in an extremely traumatised person and learning how to support him while he learns how to exist.

Oh and also the power imbalance that exists accidentally by Jean not having context for what Jeremy, Cat and Lalia have been through too! He’s picked up there’s something but he’s always the one being pushed to talk about things, but he knows it’s not appropriate to pry about those things with them. It’s neat.

The coaches responses are interesting too. From the shoving Jean towards the water (I wanted to punch them omg /lh), to civil conversations, to showing Jean a Raven thing and just not understanding his response.

It’s nice to see how much the Trojan’s don’t understand, they don’t know how to respond, they have no idea what’s sensitive and what’s not. We love the foxes for how understanding they are and seeing a contrast of a privileged team is awesome to see.

I’m excited to see Jean and Bee’s sessions. Adore the book and Jean’s unhinged out of pocket self<3

[darkfictionjude]

Can I just say, separately from the plot going on and how much I could go on for hours about how I love your game. That I am so thankful for all the trans options and flavor texts you add into your game for it.

Yes, the comments are extremely infuriating, bcs they are so real to lived experiences. Like yes, Lorcan has to hold me back BCS I will attack Sally, maybe if he doesn't want to see me wear baggy clothes and get mistaken for a guy, MAYBE I should gauge his eyes out, that way he won't have to see it anymore.

But also it feels so good to read those parts BCS it's so nice to have those parts acknowledged in games, it's like you see me 🥺

All this to say, your writing is absolutely impeccable. Your characters and the world feel so real, that I wanna attack Sally the same way I wanna attack IRL ppl (/LH). Thank you for creating them and letting us read and enjoy it

Stop you’re going to make me cry and I don’t cry 💀

Yeah like this episode for me the most important crownies were the trans ones and enbys (sorry to my cis-es)

I like playing IFs that really acknowledge gender and that includes how others perceive it

[frozenjokes]

Hey, I binged read your cubscar(ian) hotguy au

And I LOVED it,

Cub's characterization is so precious, he's so autistic to me (I'm autistic so I kin heavily) the way you write him, chef's kiss and all that. Is Cub Demi? xx

Scar is so strong and yet so broken but he doesn't know it yet, I'm so glad he's in therapy now <3. I love that you wrote him this way, he's disabled (just like me) but he's not a child, he's whimsy but so life smart, I value so much when authors write him like this and his plurality is very relatable <3. And his friendship with Mumbo <3

Grian, well he's just so real, his need for a job ever tho Cub was happy looking out for him <3, his friendship just reconnecting with Mumbo so easily, warmth. I love how self aware he is, and the angst you wrote for him is heart strings shattering I loved.

Cub and Grian's relationship ahhhhh yessss. The commitment and devotion, how they are so connected they didn't notice it sliding from platonic to romantic. This just IS for me.

Cub and Scar, well (yes again 🤣) they are so sweet, and Cub holds 51% of the cards lol but Scar's 49% is really doing things for Cub wink wink. Some of the reasoning behind Cub's love is being loved. And Scar loving him because of his round edges and softness 🥹

Scar and Grian. I hope the flowers he got for them were poppies and lilacs /lh /nf; Scar's fear because of his sharp edges, Scar in other works has his weakness but he can always find in in himself to want to protect Grian almost as a superior?, but you write Scar so vulnerable and equal to Grian. They are enemies to frenemies to ... But really it's caused by the lack of knowing, eachother and their personal experiences. Again Scar and his plural view of people <3 I think Grian thought of Scar as stronger emotionally, physically, mentally then Scar ever was, and Grian used him because of this misconception. I'm glad they're getting there, truly. Did Grian feel dejected? when Scar didn't help with his wings? Angst <3

thank you!!! Cub could be Demi. So could Grian! They can be whatever your heart desires. Personally I don’t care to label any of them because it isn’t very important to me. I do think Cub would refer to both Scar and Grian has his friends even after years of being together and it drives Scar absolutely nuts. Why are you doing that. What do you Mean. Cub it’s been twenty years you can introduce me as your boyfriend I Promise no one here is going to judge you and cub just goes: ? oh right. and then he never does that. the word friend just comes easier. it’s cozy.

It’s very silly to me you pointed out scar’s friendship with Mumbo because they are not friends scar is Coping. /silly. I actually forget very often I write a lot of angst of these characters because that’s just not really how my brain categorizes turmoil. It’s always a jumpscare to see it pointed out /light hearted, joking. funniest instance of this happening 🔽

(from chapter two of the Jimmy decked out fic)

I was on call with a friend while reading this for the first time and for the life of me I Could Not think of what /nf meant and he didn’t know either so we came up with some ideas: NOT FUNNY. no fingers. non fungible. nut fart. NO FUN. no friends. Nice feet. never forget. nice flowers. new friend! NOT FAIR

it means not forced. we had to look it up LMAO /silly silly silly. thank you for the laughs

Grian thought of scar as a piece of shit self absorbed celebrity and this is true however it’s not everything. inside is a deeply, deeply, extremely deeply, unimaginably kicked puppy. he’s sad and pathetic and has big wet eyes. also he cares.

Grian wasn’t too affected by Scar’s not wanting to touch his wings, and in general the experience was a little more overwhelmingly confusing? Neither he nor Cub expected him to have such a strong reaction, especially when things between all three of them are getting better, but Scar is still carrying the weight of a lot of Grian’s poor treatment of him for weeks on end, and even though Scar’s forgiven him and understands where he was coming from, those aren’t things you can just brush off, especially when many of Grian’s gestures (good and bad) are sweeping and intense and unpredictable, and people pleasing for someone as unstable as that (less so now, but before it was bad) is Extremely Stressful. dealing with cuteguy (evil version) for months beforehand Did Not Help. there’s a reason Scar views Grian as Sharp and that’s because they have both beat the piss out of each other hundreds of times.

To a point Grian is aware of this. It’s a thing he’s discussed in therapy a thousand times, and something he had to confront directly with Jimmy. In his eyes, his friendship with Scar (despite blunders on both sides) is an act of Scar’s good will towards him as given with Scar’s forgiveness, and if Scar is having problems, then it’s not really something Grian can hold against him. Obviously that doesn’t stop feelings from being hurt, but this was more a result of The Panic Attack than the wing touching refusal. Which Grian dealt with by Pushing Minigolf Pushing Pushing Pushing Pushing. Grian’s reaction to guilt and/or rejection is I NEED TO MAKE UP FOR THIS RIGHT MEOW!!!!! and in doing so often fails miserably to read the room, which is why Cub steps in in that particular instance.

as far as wings though, if I were Grian, scar would be The Last Person I want touching them. Clumsiest motherfucker alive who in the case of this au, tends to be rougher with his affection because he literally can not tell what is too little or too much. Having someone nervous at your back probably isn’t a great feeling either, and for an activity that’s supposed to be relaxing, Cub brings a Much steadier aura. Cub also has the capacity to focus. Scar would probably need at least three other sources of stimulation to do a good job. And it would still hurt. Regular wing grooming is not supposed to hurt 💔

my rambling service comes free, well, perhaps at a small cost of a seemingly benign question. normal about her ocs frozenjokes back at it again

[pinep-ne]

you absorb your anger and your anguish

I've been mulling on about a LH/Messy/Hannigram-esque Charthur for a hot minute and after scheming with a friend for a week or two I think I've finally been able to string together my own interpretation. Beyond just. Me wanting them to yell and scrap and pin each other down in the dirt like crazed animals.

One thing I tried to focus on besides their LH counterparts were the flaws that were already observable. Just instead making them freakishly extreme. Of course with Arthur, it was a lot easier. Dog metaphors and such. So control and obedience ended up being a big theme. But as Charles and Arthur's relationship in and out of canon is often held by a mutual respect, and undeniably deep understanding towards each other, it'd be inappropriate to toss that once under an evil-er.... context..... and create an imbalance.

Possessiveness and obsession leaned more upon Charles. I mean... crazy eye-contact canonically. He looks hungry as hell. And also bringing Dutch into the mix made for some great tension. This looming figure pulling Arthur's puppet strings, and the inner conflict within Charles, his desire for this seemingly unattainable thing. And I usually don't like portraying Arthur as this unwavering, obedient object being tossed around, because he does still hold some autonomy. But I think it's important to also get that a LH Arthur is centered and devoted to his purpose and his code. He is defined by his malleability, by his loyalty. So while tedious, I believe Charles would begin to make use of it. It'd be a lot of him shutting shit down, redirecting, maneuvering, and maybe not commanding, but instead testing Arthur's compliance. Not out of malice nor for selfish reasons, but still in that possessive manner where he can take the reins and do right where Arthur has been utilized over and over. Just slowly... veering the train off its tracks.

By that matter, it's a win-win that Charles can take what he wants and give Arthur what he needs. Receiving that attention, taking control by lending control, vice-versa, pulling strings. Eventually, having this little thread around his finger, finally fitting for both parties. To reform it, and offer himself instead. Veer that steadfast machine further, and giving him no choice but to make his own choices. Still heavily manipulative enough to be Evil, but ultimately something healing. The intention of lending that familiarity of being told what to do without the discomfort of immediately snuffing those instilled habits. And because I love #downbad Arthur i think he'd be very willing— regardless if such tactic went unnoticed, just because of the almost immediate trust he has with Charles. He falls back-first into it, and against Dutch's hand still very much at his neck, it is adrenaline inducing. Him and Charles' dance, solely driven by consuming hunger, and the violent desire to mend, rewrite over with a signature of love. To Arthur, this willingness is still a way of expressing that love without it feeling conditional. To take what he wants and trust Charles to do the same, to swallow what is said is needed, and lend it in return. You were given a choice to kill that poacher for a reason.

At the same time I think, especially in the midst of development, there is still that harmonic tug-of-war. A horrendous mix of manipulation and constant trepidation, but ultimately in appealing to this more innate thing— intimidation. Like two circling wolves. LH Arthur can be just as insistent. The difference of such can be paralleled to both him and Charles' hunting techniques I suppose. Arthur wouldn't be very patient about it. Never necessarily taking Charles for himself, but still scrutinizing his every move and snatching opportunities to find those flaws/weaknesses. Fan the flames and then smother them. Collide head-on just to settle into their slow-dance as if nothing happened.

Charles, tossing shrewd comments, never towards but instead as mere suggestions around Arthur. Gripes about his relationship with Mary, nit-picking on shameful habits, turning Arthur one way just to tug him another direction. Chipping at the armor till there's only a vulnerable, seething pair of jaws and fists left. An outlet of sorts. Breaking down every wall and pulling every nail Dutch has pressed into Arthur. And Arthur, simultaneously entertained by this destruction, feeding these delusions. Wrenching it away just moments after. Flirting with other folk when they go out to drink, presenting himself even crueler, as if to flaunt progress lost at Charles. At the same time in defense, naturally. A breaking point he never wants to reach, which just happens to drive Charles crazy.

All the while they both know Arthur is incapable of biting back. Charles is incapable of initiating outright. It is all there is until Arthur has that advantage, pinning down (either metaphorically or physically, I wont yuck your yum either way) with unbridled anger, fully set to end this affair one way or another. Coming to the revelation (oh my god this guy is a FREAK!) the moment it all shifts, and Charles offers a certain look; unfurling himself to Arthur, and releasing that control. And I don't think it'd be a heavy LH dynamic without some internalized shit; Arthur is physically revolted by it as if he hasn't been pulling the strings just as passionately. But it's not necessarily shameful. Just both of them sort of disgusted by this hunger, and yet indulging anyways. This of course is just another catalyst. They're so emotionally unavailable it all gets translated into seething frustration. Which definitely helps with the whole turning point.

I think that's honestly where it tips over the deep end. Everything is sort of fostered into this vulnerable existence between each other. Tender, not in a sensitive way, but burning greatly. Charles' anger a wildfire, and Arthur's a perpetual simmer boiling over. Pushing each other away and baring the violence of their pasts; colliding back like two galaxies to soothe it all over in the manners they know how.

[arnrdsjj]

welp. what if i say kokuto's normal ending is the best for me. what if i make it his one and only canon ending. then what /lh

unfortunately, i was only able to check it out just now,,, but anyway. a very short rant from me (that's the last one as regards kokuto's route, i promise)

i know it's extremely simple and short and doesn't give him as much closure with his dad as his best ending might seem to, but in my opinion, it does what it should and serves him quite well for one simple reason—it gives him time and space to free himself from the shackles of his past and thus to heal and grow at his own comfortable and healthy pace

as much as i love his monologue by the sea in his best ending, i must say i only love it on the condition that it happens at least a few months later. a year or two later, in the best-case scenario. it was too hectic and belittled the incidence of the trauma he didn't even try to deal with for so many years. to me, it felt like he replaced the great importance which he attached to his dad in his life with kisa's "perfect" existence. at first, he believed in god who died, his dad, and then he found another god who's alive, kisa, who he can now build his whole personality and carrier around more easily and, seemingly, less painfully. that's what i see in it

his normal ending, on the other hand, is triggered with quartz winning mere silver which, in contrast to gold, doesn't give that "i'm a genuis" feeling back to him. it's the opposite: it grounds him, it makes him human, it helps him realize he isn't perfect (which i also find incredibly ironic because that's exactly how we started with him ordering around like a know-it-all he is which the game itself presented to us as a hurdle he needs to clear to become something more than a husk lol). he made a lot of mistakes in his life and has a long way to go before he can finally deem himself worthy, special, and talented. that's the point of the character development i think he should've come to all long

honestly, if he proceeded to deem himself a genius, he'd probably end up like his dad—having no one around to understand, help, and support him, giving sense and paying attention to someone else but never himself thus sealing his own doom too soon which is... definitely not what i like him to be

and don't even get me started with everything that involves kisa. i'm so glad to see him just . leaving her alone. LMAO. he doesn't tie her to himself, to his ideas and dreams. he just lets her enjoy her life and growth in univeil realizing, most likely, he can't be everything to her and there're people around her who are more reliable, who are better for her, better than him, at this very stage of her life

yeah... this ending is thought (and imagination) provoking, and i'm completely fine with it. i'm great. it's great. it makes me love my blorbo even more