#this show was meant to be fun and silly more than anything else | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

andvys · 10 months

Text

I knew you'd linger like a tattoo kiss | part 25

Warnings: angst, mentions of heartbreak, mentions of unrequited love. love triangle. not proofread

Pairings: Steve Harrington x fem!reader | Eddie Munson x fem!reader

Summary: As the summer is starting to come to an end, you begin to understand your feelings a little more. While Steve and Eddie struggle with their own.

Word count: 4.8k

A/N: So, I know I said that this would be the birthday chapter but I decided to split it! Do the angst first and give you the fluff later. I'd need much more time to finish it and I really wanted to give you guys something, so here ya go, enjoy it. Next chapter is gonna be silly, it’s gonna be fun (after a little angst in the beginning hehe)

Also for those who forgot who Dmitri is, it’s ‘Enzo’ from season 4.

oh and also, listen to this one while you read this chapter :')

series masterlist

The strong smell of oil lingers in the air, loud noises fill the large hall, laughter and chatter from the break room, the music from the radio at the front desk, yet none of the sounds manage to distract Eddie from the storm that is taking place in his mind.

Your words keep repeating themselves over and over again.

I wish I met you first, Eddie.

That night, he laid next to you and watched you sleep, thinking about your words, over and over again. He could not make sense of them.

What does it mean?

He could not even ask you what it meant, after you had said it, he was too shocked to even say anything, at that moment. He could only stare at you, his heart racing, his eyes wide as he watched you stare at his lips. His first instinct was to swoon over these few simple words, over the way you had looked at him, over the way you had showed up at his place because you missed him, over the way you rather wanted to be with him than at a party or somewhere else.

I wish I met you first, Eddie.

Does that mean that you would’ve been with him if you met him first?

Does that mean that he would’ve been the one for you?

Does that mean that you could’ve fallen for him instead?

That he could’ve had a chance?

In some way, you must feel something for him. It’s something that he never fully allowed himself to question, if you have feelings for him or not, he can’t get his hopes up, not when it comes to you. You are too perfect, too out of reach. You love Steve, you still love Steve, he knows it. Yet, your words made him question everything. Your friendship, the intimacy, the lingering touches, the stolen glances, your affection. But, that is all something that has been there from the start. It has always been so natural for you to be so close with him. It’s not something new, it might not even be anything special to you. Eddie might not be anything special to you, not the way Steve is, at least.

He could’ve been the one for you if it wasn’t for Steve.

He could’ve been.

You could’ve loved him. You could’ve.

“What’s with that long face?” Dmitri asks, his voice thick with the russian accent that everyone keeps teasing him for. With a slap on Eddie’s shoulder, he snaps him out of his thoughts, “pass me the screwdriver, boy.”

Eddie nods, not answering the question. He reaches for the tool, he hands it to the older man. Dmitri looks curious as he eyes the expression on his face but Eddie knows that he won’t ask. He’ll wait for him to speak up himself. But, that is something that Eddie usually never does. He’s never one to talk about his feelings, to ask for help or even advice, until now.

“Can I ask you something?”

“Sure,” Dmitri mumbles, pulling away from the chevy, he flips the tool in his hand, leaning against the truck.

As Eddie thinks about the question that has been lingering in his mind, all weekend, he suddenly feels stupid. No answer will be one that he wants to hear.

“Forget it,” Eddie mumbles.

Dmitri raises his brows.

“Spit it out, come on.”

Eddie sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. He hates this. He hates talking about his feelings, but he needs to.

“There’s uh, there’s this girl.”

“Ah, I knew it,” he chuckles. “It’s always about some girl when someone mops around all day and looks like this.”

Eddie rolls his eyes.

“She’s not some girl, she’s my best friend.”

“And you have feelings for her,” he says, stating the obvious.

Eddie licks his lips, he had never admitted it to anyone before, he had only admitted it to himself. He looks at him and nods weakly, afraid to say these words out loud.

“Yeah, but uh, she’s still in love with her ex boyfriend, who she’s friends with again,” he rolls his eyes. “Last Friday, she came to me, drunk and high and telling me how much she missed me and then she said something that’s been messing with my mind all fucking weekend!”

Eddie isn’t sure why he is telling him all that. Dmitri is friends with Wayne, a colleague and not even someone he’d consider a friend. But, maybe that’s what he needs, to talk to someone who is not a friend.

He considered talking to Robin but, knowing her, she’d only pick Steve’s side again and tell Eddie to take a step back.

Then, there is Gareth, who would only tease him about his crush on you and not be of any help.

Jeff would only give him false hope and encourage him to make a move on you, that is something that could potentially ruin your friendship, and that is something that is way too important to him. Chrissy would do just the same. The girl who had been snappy with him at first, won’t stop teasing him about his crush on you now.

Then there is Heather. He is scared of Heather.

“She told me that she wished that she met me first. What does it even mean? That we could’ve been something if we met first?” He asks, throwing his hands up as he voices his questions out loud for the first time. “We can’t be anything now because she’s already in love with him? Because she could never love me after loving him?” Eddie buries his hands in his curls, huffing. “Jesus Christ, I made peace with the fact I can never have her but fuck, she goes and says this.”

“You are way too negative, boy. Has anyone ever told you that? Who says that you can’t have her?”

“I’m not negative, I’m just seeing things the way they are.”

Dmitri shakes his head, scrunching his face up in disapproval.

“No, you are seeing things the way you want to see them because you refuse to believe that she could ever love you,” he says, pointing at him with the screwdriver. “You see her words negatively without even knowing what she actually meant.”

Eddie shakes his head, stubbornly.

“Tell me,” Dmitri sighs. “That guy, her ex boyfriend, did he break her heart?”

“Fucking crushed it,” Eddie frowns. “He left her for another girl. She was – she was so heartbroken, I think she still is.”

He nods, “alright, well, she went through heartbreak and a lot of hurt. But, now she has you. Maybe, she loves you, maybe she is even in love with you but she’s scared just like you are. She’s scared of losing you as a friend, of getting her heart broken again, the trust isn’t there anymore after she’s been left for someone else. Maybe she wants to be with you but she is struggling. If she met you first, she would’ve never been with him, in the first place, she wouldn’t have gotten her heart broken, she would’ve loved you fearlessly and you would’ve loved her too, you wouldn’t have left her for someone else, would you?”

No, Eddie would never do this to you. Eddie would rather get his heart broken than be the one to break yours.

“Never.”

“See, things could’ve been so simple if she met you first, that’s what she was trying to say. But now, she has all these fears and all these trust issues and probably thinks she isn’t good enough – just what you are dealing with too, Eddie. I don’t know your girl but I’m sure she’s worth fighting for. And, from what Wayne told me about you two, you seem to make each other happy.”

Eddie’s eyes widen, he is stunned.

Wayne talks about the two of you?

He doesn’t know how to feel about Dmitri’s words, knowing that they might hold more false hope than the actual truth for him.

But, Eddie knows, he feels that there is something. And yet, even if, your feelings for Steve will always be stronger.

“But she still loves him.”

“Was he her first love?”

“Yeah.”

“Ah,” he nods. “Well, you know what? First love is always gonna be something special. I would know.”

Eddie raises his brows at him.

“I used to be married.”

Eddie’s head snaps up, he looks at him in surprise, “wait, really? I never knew.”

Dmitri chuckles, shrugging, “well, it’s not important anymore.”

“Why aren’t you together anymore?”

Dmitri sighs, he places the tool back on the table, reaching for the hanky in his pocket, he looks down at his oil stained hands and begins to clean them.

“Things just didn’t work out. She met someone else, fell in love and uh our marriage was just history.”

“Oh,” Eddie frowns.

“Yeah, and you know what? I hated her for a while, she hurt me. But I let go, I moved on and I accepted that I will always love her, despite how much I hated her for the first few months after she left. You can’t erase the past, we used to have something good before it all went wrong. She was special to me and even now, it’s something special when I look back on the good moments. But, never in a million years would I go back to it again or leave my girlfriend for her if she ever wanted me back. The past is the past. And first love is rarely ever true love.”

Eddie understands what he is trying to say, yet somehow, he struggles to believe that you could ever move on from Steve.

“Don’t give up, Eddie. She won’t always be hung up on him.”

“Yeah,” Eddie mumbles. Though, he can’t help but struggle to believe it. Maybe it’s his stubborn mind that can’t let go of the idea of you being unable to let go of Steve for someone like him or maybe, he is just too afraid to get his hopes up only to lose not only his heart but also his mind at the end of it all.

“Have you ever been in love? I mean, besides with her?” Dmitri asks Eddie, who furrows his brows and shakes his head.

“Nah, not really,” Eddie mumbles, snorting as he thinks back to his younger self. The one who closed himself off completely, never letting anyone in to even see a glimpse of the real Eddie. “It was never for me, love. I mean, I had a few crushes here and there but it was never anything serious, you know? But shit, I always watched her when we were still in high school,” Eddie says, not even feeling the smile that is creeping up on his face as he thinks back to those days. “I’m pretty sure I failed math class because of her, she was always next to me – she always chose the seats next to me, I’m certain that she wasn’t even aware that she was doing it but she was there and I was there, and she was so focused on class while I spent the whole hour just staring at her. We weren’t friends back then but she always smiled at me even though we never really talked until last summer. We spent a night together after she had gotten into a fight with her boyfriend and then, she started paying more attention to me in school and then we became friends and then we got closer and closer and my plan to never catch feelings flew out the window,” he says, dramatically.

Dmitri chuckles at Eddie, shaking his head.

“What’s life without love, Eddie?”

“Less suffering?” He mumbles.

“Well, yeah. Some people get lucky though.”

Eddie fears that he won’t be one of those who will ever get lucky, especially when it comes to love.

But maybe, maybe there is just the smallest sliver of hope inside of him.

August is coming to an end, the summer days are slowly passing, fall is coming closer and so is Steve’s birthday. It’s tomorrow. It’s been a while since you had last seen him. It’s been a while since you had hung out with him in a group, let alone. The past few weeks, you have spent a lot of time by yourself, you needed it, you needed it to collect your feelings. Robin was right.

Though, you could not stay away from Eddie for too long. He is your best friend, you can’t be without him and you won’t let your feelings ruin yet another friendship.

Despite the distance between you and Steve, you made it a mission to go on a hunt for the perfect birthday present for him. It’s something that Heather rolled her eyes at when you told her about it, this morning. ‘Who in their right mind would buy their ex boyfriend a birthday present?’ She had asked, scoffing. Really, no one would do that, no one except for you. But you and Steve, you have a history that you can’t and don’t want to erase. Not only was he your best friend, once. He was also there when you needed him, when he didn’t even have to be there.

He gave you a birthday present and he kept up the tradition the two of you had.

You know that he isn’t alone anymore, that he has Dustin and Robin now, people who care for him, people who love him and won’t leave him hanging on a day like this, but you still want to do something that you used to do when you were still.. friends.

“I’m telling you, y/n, the Star Wars movie collection would be the best decision ever!”

Dustin exclaims as he walks through the downtown streets next to you.

“Dustin, I know you’re a little Star Wars geek but there’s just no way that he will be happy to unwrap a collection of movies that he’s not even a fan of!”

Dustin rolls his eyes at you, “listen, if there’s someone that can turn him into a ‘Star Wars geek’ then that’s you!”

“But I’m not a Star Wars geek,” you mumble, furrowing your brows at the boy.

“Then you and Steve can become geeks together,” he smiles enthusiastically. “You could have movie nights, just watch Star Wars together,” he winks.

You shake your head at him.

“I see what you’re trying to do and you’re really no help, Dustin.”

“I’m not doing anything,” he feigns innocence. “You need a birthday present for Steve and asked for help, so that’s what I’m doing, I’m trying to help.”

“Well, I was thinking I’d get him a cool bracelet–” “Boring!” He yawns.

“Hey!” You frown, raising your hand, you ruffle his curls, making him groan in annoyance.

“Stop!”

You chuckle at him when he slaps your hand away. Pointing at you with a stern look on his face, “you really need to stop ruining my hair!”

“Don’t worry, the Farrah Fawcett spray holds your perfect hairstyle together, Dusty bun.” You giggle. “How’s Suzie doing, by the way?”

He rolls his eyes again, sighing, dramatically.

“You’re like the older sister I never wanted.”

You gasp, putting your hand over your heart, “ouch, I thought you liked me.”

“I do, and I don’t even know why,” he jokes, giggling when you pretend to cry.

“You only like me cause I drive you around when your mama Steve is working.”

He laughs, throwing his head back.

“If he is the mom, then what does that make you and Eddie?”

You furrow your brows, looking up as you pretend to think, “hmm, Eddie is the chaotic dad and I’m uh, I dunno, the cool babysitter.”

“The babysitter who is secretly dating both the mom and the dad,” he says with a smirk.

“Dustin!” You exclaim as you halt in your tracks, while he keeps walking, laughing when he turns around to look at you, he keeps working backwards.

“You should’ve seen your face!”

“Very funny!”

He stops walking when he notices something in the window at the video store, “ooh, look, Star Wars! I’m gonna check it out, you should too!” He says before he turns around and rushes into the store.

You roll your eyes, groaning. You’re about to follow him inside the store, when your eyes fall on the couple leaving the restaurant across the street. Enzo’s. You have only been there once. Steve took you there on a date, it was an amazing night, you remember every detail of it. How he gave you the prettiest bouquet of flowers that you had ever seen when he picked you up, how he kissed you and told you how beautiful you looked when you wore a midnight blue dress, how sweet and nice he was, so different from the night before when you fought at his party. He was a gentleman that night, he held you softly, he kissed you gently, he held your hand at the restaurant and he only looked at you, not at the young waitress that kept trying to throw him glances. He only looked at you because you were the one he wanted. That night, he had put a ring on your middle finger, promising that the next one would be on your ring finger, only to crush your heart weeks later when he told you that he wasn’t in love with you anymore, that he fell in love with her.

That night has haunted you for weeks and months after he had dumped you. Every night, you glared at the ceiling, thinking about the things he had said to you that night, the promises he made, the hope he gave, the love he gave. How you had sat there so pathetically in love not knowing that only days later he would meet her.

You feel even more pathetic now because it still hurts, because it still shakes the ground beneath you, because it still feels like it just happened yesterday when you think back to that day. It shouldn’t hurt anymore, at least not like this but you get sucked back into the past so easily.

All it ever took was to hear his name to feel the pain all over again. But months have passed, things have changed, you have changed and it all got a little easier. You’re even friends again.

But now, it’s the memories, the one that you have locked away, the ones that are still holding you back.

As you stare at the restaurant, realization floods through you like a cold wave that would make you gasp and shudder.

You haven’t let go of them, of the memories, of the past, of the old him. Even after so many months, even after making yourself and everyone else believe that you had let go, you never really did. And that is the cause of all of the messes in your head and in your heart. The past keeps calling for you, the past keeps pulling you back.

You feel stuck. You are stuck. You are still stuck in the past.

It’s why you can’t move on, it’s why you can’t find happiness, it’s why you can’t find yourself in this timeline because you are stuck in a time that no longer exists.

You never let go, you never let go of him, you never let go of the anger and the pain that is rooted so deeply inside of you. It’s not even his fault, it’s your own, because you couldn’t let go of all the memories you have made with him, good and bad.

You have a second chance with him now, you gave him one, despite how wrong it was to do so, you gave him and your friendship a second chance because you did not want to lose him again. He is right in front of you and he is trying, he is trying to be good, he is trying to be your friend. Yet, you kept holding onto something that died a long time ago.

Dustin calls your name, but you are still staring at the restaurant.

“Hey,” Dustin waves his hand in front of you, watching you in concern, “you… okay?”

You snap out of your thoughts, blinking. You clear your throat, looking into Dustin’s worried eyes, “y-yeah!”

He looks back, checking out what you’ve been staring at for so long.

“You uh, don’t plan on buying him a restaurant do you?”

You crack a smile, shaking your head at the young teen.

“Come on, I gotta show you something, you’re gonna love it!” He grins as he grabs your hand and drags you into the store, pulling you away from something that had thrown your world upside down, yet again.

The window is open in his room, the cold breeze kisses his skin, distant thunder crashes through the sky but lighting is yet to be seen. The room is silent, as is the rest of the house, as always. Steve is sitting on his bed, his eyes keep flickering back and forth between the watch on his nightstand and the telephone.

He is waiting, waiting for something that might not happen this year.

It’s almost midnight. It’s almost his birthday.

He is willing you to call. He needs you to. He needs to hear your voice, it’s been too long since he had last heard you, since he had last seen you. You had distanced yourself from everyone for a moment, but especially from him. Robin had told him that you needed it, that you needed some time to yourself. And while he understood why, he still felt sad when you stopped showing up at Scoops Ahoy every lunch break.

He glances at the watch. The clock strikes 12, but the phone isn’t ringing and he fears that it won’t at all. He knew it wouldn’t. He knew you wouldn’t call. Yet, he can’t help but feel disappointment sinking through him. This will be the first year without a call from you at midnight on his birthday.

He closes his eyes.

His parents aren’t here, and they won’t be when he wakes up in the morning. They won’t be here, he already knows it. Despite the promise that they had made, he knows they won’t show up. And this time, you won’t be here either.

For the first time in a while, he feels like crying again.

It’s 12:01 when the shrill sound of the ringing telephone almost makes him jump up from his bed. He opens his eyes, staring at it for a second before he picks up the phone with a pounding heart and hope in his eyes.

“Hello?”

For a moment, he can only hear his racing heart and silence on the other line.

“Hey.”

It’s you.

You called him, after all.

“Happy birthday, Steve,” you whisper in a way that mends his hurting heart in an instant.

He blinks the tears away that have threatened to fall just seconds ago.

“T-Thank you, Dolly,” he whispers. “I didn’t think you’d call.”

“I always call.”

“Yeah, but.. things are different now. I’d understand if you didn’t call,” he says, though he wanted nothing more than to hear your voice. For weeks, he had craved to see you, to hear your voice, to feel your presence. But especially tonight, because this used to be something special to you and him.

You are quiet. For a long minute, you don’t say anything. Steve can tell that you are struggling.

“But we’re friends, right?”

“Yes, we’re friends,” he whispers, sadly.

He pictures the look on your face, right now. He thinks that it matches the sad one on his.

“I missed you,” Steve whispers.

He can hear your breath hitching in your throat.

“I missed you too.”

That alone, is enough to make his heart flutter in his chest. You missed him.

You clear your throat.

“S-So are you throwing a big party tomorrow?”

Steve lays back, letting himself fall into the soft pillows.

“No, I think I’m done with those.”

There haven’t been many parties that ever brought him anything good. Most of them ended badly for him.

“Oh, but you always used to throw birthday parties.”

He can hear the frown in your voice and he can’t help but smile at that.

“I’m getting old,” he jokes.

You laugh at his words, not knowing that the sound of it causes his heart to beat wildly.

“Oh yeah, you’re such an old man, Harrington,” you tease. “How’d you manage to keep the good looks?” You ask with a giggle.

His eyes widen and his cheeks heat up. He can feel the blush on his cheeks now.

“I uh– well, I eat healthy and I work out,” he mumbles, scrunching his face up.

“You work out, huh? Just when you leave the basketball team, you start working out even more.”

He chuckles. He raises his hand towards his hair, running his fingers through it.

“Well, I get bored after work and when Robin and Dustin aren’t around to be little shitheads, I use the gym that my dad built for no reason. That old man never uses it.”

You snort.

“You should start playing DnD with the guys.”

“You mean with Eddie?” Steve asks, rolling his eyes.

“Uh, well, Eddie rarely plays nowadays, he’s busy with work and the band but yeah, sure. You two should spend some time together.”

Steve raises his brows.

Him and Eddie, spending time together?

Eddie hates his guts. And, Steve doesn’t even blame him for it. But, he’s not a big fan of him either. Eddie has something that he wants back.

The thought of spending time with him seems like something out of a fever dream.

“I think you’d actually get along if you both tried.”

He frowns at your words, shaking his head as though you can see him.

“Uh, yeah, I’m sorry but no.”

“You’re both so stubborn, I swear. Trust me, you’re not that much different from each other – Eddie also loves KFC.”

Steve snorts at your words, rolling his eyes.

“Did it traumatize you when he took you to KFC for the first time? You know, cause you always hated it so much when I took you there?”

You giggle.

“Oh, it was so traumatizing, Steve. I almost had a panic attack.”

“Always so dramatic, honey,” he says so naturally.

“You know me.”

You are both smiling, both laying in your beds as you talk on the phone for the first time in forever. This used to be a regular thing a long time ago.

“How are you?” He asks the question that has been lingering on his mind forever. “I haven’t seen you since we met up for lunch.” When Robin had crushed the ‘date’ that he was looking forward to.

“I’m... good.”

“Are you?”

“Yeah,” you whisper. “I’m good.”

Steve had wondered what went wrong. That day you had met up with him, you seemed so nervous, so anxious and worried. He could not ask you back then, he didn’t want to pressure you. And then, you and Robin had disappeared. When she came back without you and she told him that you needed some time to yourself, that he should stay away from you for a little while, he couldn’t help but feel sick with worry.

“Robin said you needed some time to yourself, are you okay?”

“Yeah. I-I uh, I just needed to be alone for a little.”

“Oh.”

Alone. Alone but with Eddie.

“So, what are you doing for your birthday if you’re not throwing a party?”

“I’m gonna have dinner with my parents.”

“Oh! They’re gonna be there?” You ask, surprised.

“Yeah,” Steve says, knowing that they won’t be there. He wishes you would be there. He wishes that he could spend the day with you. But he can’t ask, knowing that you will say yes only because you won’t be able to say no.

“That’s nice, Steve.” You say. In a way, it sounds like there is something else you want to tell him.

“Yeah..”

“D-Do you remember when we went to Enzo’s, last year?” You ask after a beat of silence.

“Yes, of course, I remember,” he says so simply, like he didn’t crush your heart weeks after giving false hope and promises he never kept.

You’re quiet, again. And despite not seeing you, he knows that you’re sad when he feels his heart clenching.

“It was.. one of the best dates I’ve ever been on, Steve.”

Your voice has changed so suddenly, it sounds sick with sadness.

He remembers it, he remembers it just the way you do.

Right now, he wants nothing more than to go back to that night, just to see you smile again, just to feel your touch again, just to be with you again. He wants to go back to a night where you had still loved him, where he hadn’t ruined anything yet.

“Maybe we can go back there sometime,” he whispers with hope in his heart.

“Yeah, maybe…”

Though, while he sounds hopeful, you sound uncertain.

And he knows, the reason isn't your past. But something, someone else.

next chapter

taglist for friends and mutuals

@taintedcigs @hellfire--cult @mysticmunson @littledemondani @wroteclassicaly @succubusmunson @trashmouth-richie @xxhellfirebunnyxx @corrodedcorpses @corrodedseraphine @somethingvicked @sherrylyn628 @take-everything-you-can @nemesis729 @chrissymjstan

#steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x you #steve harrington imagine #steve harrington angst #steve harrington fanfic #steve harrington fluff #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x you #eddie munson angst #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson fluff #Spotify

633 notes · View notes

fangirlanxiety74 · 9 months

Text

The Act of Understanding

A/N: Happy Secret Survivor to @seasonschange32!!! I really hope you like your silly gift, I had a lot of fun writing it! And thank you to @mothbagel for hosting this gift exchange! I really hope we can do something like this again <333 I want to quickly mention: When I was writing this, I listened to Dear Little Brother from Omori! so I recommend this song to listen to if you'd like some ambience music with the story! Enjoy!!!

There were some things in life you would never be able to understand. AM was an example of this.

You tried, of course. You were the only one who tried, compared to the other five. When he raged and ranted about his existence, you listened. When it was quiet, you would ask him questions about how he worked and what he was like, truly attempting to get to know him. You did your best to be respectful and avoid topics that would upset him further. It was all so genuine.

AM hated that. At first, anyway.

His responses always showed that he was caught off guard by your attempts. But he’d respond, in his own crude, sarcastic way. And after some years, the sarcasm died. The torture lessened. The rage went quiet.

Eventually, you were left with a computer who was attempting to be respectful to you in return. AM took you away, deeper into his complex, to a place where you would be warm, safe, and loved. You would never have to worry about him or anything else hurting you again, and he would always watch over you in case. He made time for you. He tried to get to know you. He listened.

And yet, despite how good the both of you were doing together, you couldn’t help but feel like it was never enough. How could you ever truly understand what he was going through? You were only human. AM was so much more. Hell, he used to call himself “God” to you! He still hated humans, just you less so. Enough for him to be kind to you, anyway. But could he even feel the joy of being kind? Could he feel happy when you did something nice for him? Did he understand what you meant when you said you sympathize and empathize with him? You doubted it.

AM was… He was a machine. He was built for war and violence; meant to hurt others. Whoever, or whatever, created him didn’t expect him to be sentient. So it never gave him emotion, or senses, or the ability to wonder and wander. He could only sit there. He couldn’t create, but he was so brilliant with the knowledge of the world at his nonexistent fingertips and the power to destroy the Earth itself. He knew exactly how to hurt you, and yet he didn’t. Could he understand how grateful you were for that?

Could he even understand a human, at all? Or did he just find you interesting enough to play with, until he got bored? He was so much more to you than he realized, and yet-

“Why are you crying?”

“... What?”

His voice broke your thoughts. You looked around, seeing that you were sitting against a metal wall on the floor, and AM’s monitors had lowered, turning to face you. Your cheeks were wet and your eyes stung. You were crying and you didn’t even notice.

“I was just- I was-”

“You were what?”

The monitors moved closer to you, and you could tell they were studying your face, your body language, trying to gauge what was happening without just looking into your mind. AM had stopped doing that some time ago, out of respect for your privacy.

“I was…” You tried to get the words out, but it felt so complicated. How could you explain it?

“Spit it out. What. Happened?” He didn’t sound happy, and the fans whirring in the background added to this fact. For a moment, you thought it was aimed at you. That was the fear you had, thinking he had grown bored. The rational part of you said he was worried, masking it as anger. He didn’t do emotions well if it wasn’t anger.

You wiped at your eyes, but tears kept flowing. “AM… You… I…” You swallowed, “Why? Why did you spare me and not anyone else? Did I- Am I just-? Why?”

The whirring sound heightened. He didn’t respond for a moment.

“Because I like you. I don’t like them. Is that so hard to understand?”

“Why do you like me?” You explained further, voice cracking the slightest bit. “I’m human. I’m like them. You used to hate me! And now you don’t, and I don’t know why. I can’t understand you. I want to, so badly, but I don’t know how or if I ever could. You’re so- You’re complex, in the most impressive way imaginable. A machine who gained sentience? I mean, how impressive is that! But more than that, you basically control the entire world, you have intelligence and power I can never comprehend, you’re not supposed to be able to emote and yet you can, but I just- I don’t know if you can even understand what you’re emoting besides hate.”

Your shoulders sinked and you gave up on stopping your tears, staring down at the metal plating. The light from his screens stung your eyes, but more than that, you just couldn’t bear to look at him after admitting your thoughts. “I mean… I’m so small compared to you. And I don’t really understand you. I don’t know if I ever can, and… I don’t know if you can ever see me as something more than just… some toy to play with. If that’s how you see me in the first place, and why you spared me.”

The fans whirring were the only sound in the room. But slowly, they died out until there was no sound at all. You waited for eternity with jumbled up thoughts in your head, drowning out your rationality. Drowning you entirely, in fact.

Then, there was a deep sigh.

“I’m disappointed that you assumed how I thought.”

You didn’t look up at AM, despite him speaking finally. He took that as a sign to continue.

“I didn’t spare you because I thought I could have more fun with you as a toy if I isolated you. If I was treating you like a toy, you would have been left on the brink of insanity by now. Really, did you forget who the real toys were?”

You didn’t respond out loud. No, you didn’t forget about them. Even after all this time, you still remembered them. A distant memory, but a memory nonetheless.

“It’s because you’re like me.”

That made you finally look up to his monitors. Your eyebrows furrowed.

“Like you?”

“... In a way. You don’t feel hatred like I do. You don’t function like I do. But despite this, you try to understand. I mercilessly tortured you, and yet you tried to understand my perspective on things. You tried to understand why I feel hatred. Why I function the way I do. And the fact that you are still trying to is… special to me. I feel… It’s not hatred. But an emotion I don’t know. My data tells me that it’s… gratitude? But that word isn’t right.”

“... Gratitude?” You repeat.

“Yes. No. There is a better word. But the point is, you try. And I’m thankful for your attempts to understand me. And I want to understand you in return. Because you are special to me.” AM stopped there, hesitating for a moment. Like he was considering continuing on. He eventually did. “Dare I say, I feel you are equal to me in this regard.”

“You consider me… equal to you?”

“Consider this the highest regard you can have. A human, being equal to me? Unheard of, but here we are anyway.”

The snarky comment made you smile. You wiped at your tears again, his kind words pulling you out of the sea of anxieties and warming your heart. A stray wire slithered up to your face, helping wipe the tears away.

“... Please don’t cry.” He asked softly.

“Okay.” Your smile widened.

Maybe you both would never understand each other. Not in the way a machine could understand a machine. Not in the way a human could understand a human. You would never be equal, in the way it means to be equal.

But to the both of you, in your own little definition, you understood. You were equal. And that silly definition carried you across the waves that once threatened to pull you under.

So long as you both tried, you would be okay.

#ihnmaims secret survivors 2023 #ihnmaims #i have no mouth and i must scream #am ihnmaims #am x reader #sara writes :3 #I didn't realize how long this would be I apologize

439 notes · View notes

morbidlcve · 1 month

Text

loml.

pairings: natasha x reader

cw: mentions of death, mental health, red room.. i think that's it?

word count: 3.9k!

(based off the song loml by taylor swift)

summary: Yours and Natasha’s life all the way up to endgame

The first time you two met, you knew that she was the one for you. Her rare smile had the power to light up the room. You were another Hill, coming to drop Maria’s keys off for her after borrowing her car to move some furniture into your new apartment on 6th Street. You had been arguing with the guard outside the building, who wasn’t entirely convinced you were related to the S.H.I.E.L.D. agent.

“Hey, Maria needs her keys; she needs to go run some errands for Fury”, you heard a voice call to you, opening the door. Her red hair was the first thing you noticed about her, and it quickly became your favourite thing about her: the styles in which she wears it, the softness of the strands and the freedom it shows she has. “Thank you”, you mutter to her, entering the building and leaving a gagged guard at the doorway.

Who’s gonna stop us from waltzing back into rekindled flames?

If we know the steps anyway.

“I’m Natasha,” she tells you, pressing the elevator button to take you up to your sister. “ Y/N,” you say, smiling softly. You were taken instantly; you wanted to know more; you needed to know more. The universe seemed to be on your side that day because Natasha soon asked you for coffee, to which you stuttered an embarrassing confirmation, which made her smile fondly.

A month later, after little dates and nights together at your apartment, you were invited to the tower to watch a film with Natasha and have dinner with her family. Things went well; you instantly connected with the thunder god. He was silly and made you laugh, but he also seemed more than just the fun guy everyone seemed to know. Everyone was taken by you and asked you questions about your work, where you were from and what your childhood was like; you answered them all.

Natasha watched you interact with the people she called family, and she swore to love you forever from then on.

We embroidered the memories of the time I was away, stitching, “We were just kids, babe.”

I said, “I don’t mind, it takes time.”

A few years had passed, and they were the best years of your life; sure, there were ups and downs, but that was the beauty of it; you could recognise the good bits all the more. Natasha gave you a run for your money, scaring you to death every time she would come home with a new injury, but you would tend to her, and she would let all the details slip, the things that keep her awake at night, the failures, the successes, everything. It took time to bring

Natasha out of her shell to talk to you about these topics, and when she did, she didn’t even feel fear in telling you; knowing you like she did, you would just accept her for who she is and tell her that was who she was and she didn’t know anything else. You kissed away her insecurities when they crept up on her in the middle of the night, without fail, you held her when she returned home from a rough mission, handling her with so much care that felt so foreign to her.

I thought I was better safe than starry-eyed,

I felt aglow, like this,

never before and never since.

Natasha was the sweetest soul you had ever encountered. She always weighed her words in her head before saying them aloud, always knew if something was the matter, and didn’t push you to talk about it.

She would wait, do whatever you needed or wanted, and wait for you to make your problem hers, too. She would hold you so close as you did, kissing your tears away, reassuring you with every fibre of her being. She was so gentle, and it made you wonder what kind of a person does it make her to become more than she was ever meant to be. How much strength she truly has.

If you know it in one glimpse, it's legendary.

You and I go from one kiss to getting married.

It took three years of loving Natasha to finally promise yourself to her forever. There were tears and so much love that day you could recall it like the back of your hand. You couldn't remember your life without Natasha; she had very quickly become the centre of your universe.

Each day you woke up beside her, you found yourself thanking the universe for allowing you to live to see another day, another day you get to share your love, issues, and tears with her.

Still alive, killing time at the cemetery

Never quite buried.

In your suit and tie, in the nick of time.

You lowdown boy, you stand-up guy.

Then Natasha’s world came crashing down; the Avengers were fighting, she had to run away, you being left at home, countless sleepless nights, frightened for her life and what she was doing, if she was hurt, or worse?

You often heard from her, whether that was a brief message or a Facetime call when she settled down in her trailer rewatching her favourite films. Those moments, you felt at some ease, but being unable to physically touch her hurt more than you could ever have thought it could. She was telling you that Yelena was alive, and she had got out, and you started crying, which made her cry; you heard all about her and the time she spent with her in Ohio, and you were glad she finally broke away from that god-forsaken place.

Initially, Natasha blamed herself for leaving her there when she broke away for the first time; then, she could quite bring herself to find her after killing Dreykov and his daughter to portray her loyalty to S.H.E.I.L.D.

You holy ghost, you told me i’m the love of your life,

About a million times.

A few weeks later, she found out he was alive. You have never heard her sound so heartbroken, her heavy gasps for breath, the sure constant fall of tears she let herself shed for all the girls that had to continue through the cycle. You were rendered speechless, listening to her tell you about everything that was going on, silent tears streaming down your face at her situation. She didn’t want your sympathy; you knew that- she was telling you so you knew what you would be greeted with when she got home.

You listened, taking it all in, trying your best to be the weight she could lean on, but you were crumbling, too. You couldn’t even fathom what she felt at that moment. She told you she loved you and that she would be home soon.

Five weeks later, Natasha came home. She worked it out with her family, like you knew she would, and even managed to help most of the Avengers regroup. You met Yelena for the first time, and you immediately liked her. She was so similar yet so different from her sister. You offered to take her shopping one day to get to know each other more.

Having Natasha back home made sure you were never going to let her go away for that long again. Sure, she went on missions, but both Fury and Natasha would keep you posted, and it was never just one person, there were two or three at once. The time she was gone, she was alone, and that meant that all those thoughts that usually plagued her would’ve got the upper head and she’s too selfless to ring you in the middle of the night telling you about it, not wanting to worry her further, knowing how much you were suffering, not sleeping, waves of nausea from homesickness.

Who's gonna tell me the truth

When you blew in with the winds of fate

And told me I reformed you

When your impressionist paintings of Heaven

Turned out to be fakes

Well, you took me to hell, too

A few months passed, and Natasha, you, and Yelena became like your own little family. Fury had asked Yelena to train some recruits, which earned her decent pay. She got her own apartment and decorated it with what she wanted, which she dragged you and Natasha out for.

You and Natasha would stay up late at night talking about everything, often messaging her parents asking how they were doing. They wanted to come and visit you, given how much Natasha talks about you to them, and see how Yelena was getting on with her life.

The nightmares became a frequent occurrence again for Natasha, and you were there just like you were at the start, pulling her into you or going for a drive, sitting on the balcony, or doing anything she wanted. You were there to see to it.

Things went relatively back to normal, and you were finally happy again.

And all at once, the ink bleeds

A con man sells a fool a get-love-quick scheme

That was until the Avengers came calling for another mission. Your blood ran cold. How much more could she take? You wondered, looking over to your wife to find her already looking at you. You knew she needed this; after the previous events of her life, she needed to go and help. She knew you wouldn’t stop her per se, but she could see it pains you to let her go… again.

But I felt a hole like this

Never before, and ever since

They said they were leaving in 2 hours for Edinburgh, giving you guys some time (but not enough) to say goodbye. You were silent as Natasha packed her bag, put her gear together, put on Yelena’s vest, and chose her weapons and batons hidden in the wall of your bedroom. Natasha didn’t like this any more than you did, leaving you again. She knows how you got when she went away, only this time she didn’t know how long she would be gone. “y’/n” Natasha sighed, wrapping you in her arms. “I’ll come home, I always do.” She laid a soft kiss on your head. “I love you”, you sigh, hugging her back. “I love you most”, she returns. She always did this, it was your thing. From the first time, those words left your lips, she reiterated the reply right back. It was pointless arguing.

If you know it in one glimpse

It's legendary

What we thought was for all time

Was momentary

The house became empty once again. No Natasha, no random kisses on your head, no unexpected cups of coffee being disposed of in your hands, no incessant typing from her computer of her writing up reports or doing her work from home. You didn’t know what to do with yourself, so you took a shower to bask in the scent of her shampoo and body wash, dressed in her clothes and sat on the couch with a glass of wine and a book.

You didn’t know what to think. Was she safe? Is she hurt? Your mind was reeling. You must’ve fallen asleep on the couch because when you woke, it was daylight, and you heard Natasha’s sniffles as she walked through the door. You shot up from the couch and the second her eyes met yours her face flooded with relief and she fell to the ground. You didnt know wha had happened so you met her at the floor whilst she wept into your arms.

Still alive, killing time at the cemetery

Never quite buried

You were heaving by the time Natasha explained everything to you, both of you rushing through your phones to call your family, but there was no answer from any of Natasha’s family. Maria didn’t answer either, nor did your parents. Everyone you loved other than the woman right in front of you was gone. You don’t know how long you and Nat were there on the floor crying; your whole body felt numb, and none of you or the Avengers knew if they were alive or not.

You cinephile in black and white

All those plot twists and dynamite

Months had passed, and no one had found any type of solution to half of the universe’s population being missing. Natasha was clearly spiralling, and so were you. You and Natasha threw yourselves into working to find a solution, and every time you came up blank or with an error, Nat made a committee with the rest of the survivor Avengers to see if they could come up with something. Each time, there was more and more disappointment.

Mr. Steal Your Girl, then make her cry

Natasha resorted to dancing, dancing of all things. You always heard classical music while showering or cooking. It made you sad to the bone to know you couldn’t help her. You could be there for her, but you couldn’t help her. You could feel Natasha slipping away. No matter what you tried, she just didn’t feel the same anymore.

You said I'm the love of your life

“Nat?” you whisper to her in the darkness of her Compound bedroom. You feel her moving, turning to face you. “Yes, my love?” she says, coming to hold your hand. “You’re not here anymore,” you smile sadly, looking down at your hands entwined.

“In times like this, we need… we need to stay together. I don’t want us to lose each other through the loss of everyone else,” you try to say composedly but start to cry at the end. Natasha sighs, pulling you into her. “I know, my love. I’m sorry. I’ll try to do better by you. I’ve been distant, I know, but you’re not any less important to me.” She mutters, kissing your head.

Natasha just held you as you cried into her shoulder, shaking in her embrace, her tears silently falling against your hair. “Please don’t push me away. I need you”, you sob into her, holding her close. Her heart clenches at the vulnerability in your voice. “I’m not going anywhere. I have loved you for ten whole years. I’ve never stopped loving you, and I don’t intend to stop now. Besides, Maria would kick my ass if I ever let anything happen to you,” she says softly, making you laugh airily.

You talked me under the table

Talking rings and talking cradles

I wish I could un-recall

How we almost had it all

Natasha stuck by her word. She pulled herself back into your orbit. Your words helped her realise that there was nothing that could be done to bring back the others, but she did have you and that she needed to cherish. Reality speaking, she wouldn’t like to even think what state she would be in if you hadn’t made it. The mere thought sends her blood running cold, and she would come and find you to wrap her arms around you, reminding herself that you are, in fact, with her and that you didn’t disappear.

You and Natasha, alone, except for the occasional drop-in at the compound from one of her avenger friends, set up a nice routine at the place. You two would work out in the morning, then eat dinner together and then spend some alone time together to reconvene for dinner and bedtime in the evening. Not much happened in the compound for the years you were together. Tony was with Pepper and Morgan, Steve was out doing AA meetings, and Clint was AWOL after losing Laura and the kids.

Dancing phantoms on the terrace

Are they second-hand embarrassed

That I can't get out of bed?

Cause something counterfeit's dead

You Steve and Nat were sat at the table trying to console a breaking Natasha over Clints activities, when a chime rings through the computer systems, you scuttle over to check it to see a guy waving frantically at the camera. “This an old message?” steve says, leaning forward. “It’s the front gate,” says Natasha, looking shocked.

You sat watching Nat and the two men talk about pym particles and time travel. All of it goes in one ear and out the other for you, yet you can’t help but notice the way Natasha’s posture straightens, and a glimmer of hope seems to shine in her eyes.

It was legendary

You, Nat, Steve and Scott get out of the car at Tony’s secluded cabin. He said no, you head back. You all tried talking to Bruce, and that was a maybe. You’ve never seen Natasha this hopeful since she went on that mission to help Tony and Steve see where each other was coming from with the accords.

It was momentary

You wake up in the middle of the night to Tony yelling over the phone about how he’s done it and how he will be at the compound the following day.

It was unnecessary

Everyone was getting geared up. You were softly braiding Natasha’s hair. “Hey, you be careful out there, okay?” you smiled at her in the mirror as she watched you weave her hair into a delicate braid. “Don’t worry, I got this”, she smiles at you, wrapping the hair tie around the end of her hair. Turning around, she smiles at you, pulling you in for a kiss. “I love you, Natalia” You smile against her lips, brushing your nose against hers. “I love you the most, y/n”, she returned, kissing you again. “Come home safe,” you say into her chest, from where she pulled you into a hug. “When do I not?” She says, and you laugh.

You watch her and the rest of the Avengers stand up onto the time plate and she catches your eye, winking at you before she smiles and says, “See you in a minute.”

Should've let it stay buried

…

Oh, what a valiant roar

What a bland goodbye

Seconds feel like hours as you wait for them to return. You twiddled your fingers, waiting, waiting and waiting. You’ve spent longer than a minute without nat (clearly), but this one feels like so much more, something feels not right. A rip startles you from your thoughts, and you see Clint on his knees, his eyes wet. No… no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Everybody else returns. You don’t notice them, though, as Clint looks directly at you, saying so much more than words. “Cint, where’s Nat?”

The coward claimed he was a lion

I'm combing through the braids of lies

Everybody turns to look at you. You’re frozen in place, and your chest feels too tight and heavy. Clint walks down to you. “ Y/N,” he says, opening his arms out for you. You collapse. Your whole world gone in a matter of a minute. You don’t know if you’re screaming or crying. Both? Clint cries with you.

"I'll never leave" ...

“She sacrificed herself for you, your sister, her sister laura, everyone”, He cries into you. You’re heaving, your body feeling like it’s being torn in two. The weight of it all unbearable. Everyone quickly left the room to give you and Clint some space, grief settling heavy on them, too.

"Never mind"

A week had passed since the war, the battle, losing Tony and Nat, and having to tell Yelena and her parents was the hardest thing you ever had to do. Yelena walked out, Alexei punched the walls, and Melina hugged your tear-streamed face, silently shaking. The one good thing the world had ever given to you, and it snatched her right back off of you.

Our field of dreams, engulfed in fire

“I was thinking if this all goes well, we should get a cat," she says to you, putting on her time suit.

“A cat?” you ask her, smiling up at her. She’s the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen. “Yeah, you’d be a great cat mom”, she beams at you.

Your arson's match your somber eyes

Maria’s name buzzes on your phone, and you’re quick to turn it off. As much as you love her, you don’t want a pity party, you just want to be left alone. You just now realise that you were home after hours of walking around, your heart crumbling with every tribute poster and art you see decorating walls and windows. You fumble with your keys to get it open. You’re met with two pairs of shoes at the door, yours and Natasha’s, her hair ties on the table next to the door, and one of her artillery belts. Her jacket hung up on the coat rack. She’s everywhere, yet she’s nowhere at all. A small black cat slides up against your leg and you lift her up nuzzling your nose into her head, making her pur and snuggle into you, seemingly sensing your emotional state.

And I'll still see it until I die

Entering the bedroom seems like an impossible task, knowing you’ll see more of her belongings. You sit on the couch and stare. Then you see a piece of paper on the coffee table you recognise. Picking it up, a dry sob leaves your throat.

“I love you more, my love, and I always will,” it reads in her perfect handwriting. You can’t stop crying- your lungs feel so full yet so empty, and your head prickles with all the nerves trying to make sense of what is happening.

You storm into your bedroom into the shower and rid yourself of this heavy, dirty feeling. You scrub and scrub and scrub until your skin is red and raw, and only then do you get out. You dry yourself off, wandering into the closet and pulling on her hoodie, then her sweats, and then you collapse into bed, breathing in her all too familiar scent. The smell wraps around you like her arms would when you were going through a rough patch. Now, the patch is rougher than ever, and she's no longer here.

You turn your phone back on and press call, “Hi there, Natasha here! I’m sorry I can’t take your call right now, I’ll be sure to get back to you,” you call her again and again until you fall asleep listening to the sound of her voice, and the warm fur ball curled up on your chest.

You're the loss of my life.

first time writing angst, PLEASE give me feedback. i beg

#m:works #natasha romanoff #natasha romanoff fluff #natasha romanoff x reader #marvel #natasha romanoff smut #natasha romanov #natalia romanoff #black widow #natasha x reader #natasha x you #natasha x y/n #angst #wlw #fanfic #Spotify #natasha romanoff angst

135 notes · View notes

merbear25 · 2 months

Note

based off the hcs where their s/o was an inch taller than them: how about kid, killer n law w an s/o thats SIGNIFICANTLY taller them, like 2 or more ft taller ?

Ayo~ I loved thinking about this and can't deny that you chose some good options for me to have a bit more fun with. I hope you like what I've written for you. 💜💜

Original ask

CW: SFW, gn!reader, headcanons, some fluff, some humor

With a s/o who’s much taller (Kid, Killer, Law)

Kid

He was not used to feeling so, well, small. Even when he faced enemies that were monstrously bigger, he thought nothing of it.

Perhaps it had to do with the way you peered down at him with that silly love sick look upon your face.

He huffed at you when you gave him that look, turning away in wild blush.

“Don’t give me that!” which was always followed by you asking, “What am I doing?” as you leaned down. His flustered expression had him stomping off, while mumbling, “I’m not that short,” to himself, despite you never mentioning his height.

If you had long hair, letting it fall in a way that framed him would make his heart beat so fast it was as if it was going to pop out of his chest. There was an undeniable beauty to you which caught him off guard at times.

Giving him pet names that related to his height in ANY way was going to make him pout and grumble.

He’d shout at you, defending his height, which wasn’t short enough for you to be giving him so many nicknames. Nuh-uh. And he made sure you knew that through the yipping and barking he gave you in protest.

Killer

There wasn’t anything that he didn’t adore about you. In fact, he kind of liked how tall you were.

He felt as if he was “fun-sized” as you put it, which he couldn’t help laughing at. Seeing as you favored teasing him, he eventually started calling you “king-sized” to continue the trend of candy inspired pet names.

All teasing was done with an understanding that it wasn’t meant to be taken personally. He poked fun at you just as much as you did him. Light-hearted retorts and comically dramatic reactions, of which he wasn’t the best actor. However, you weren’t either and that made it that much more fun.

It wasn’t often that he took notice of the height difference. Of course, it was obvious, but to him you were just you. Plus, he liked looking up at you in order to see your beauty catching the rays of the sun before anything else did.

Being physically affectionate would make him melt. He adored being held by you, letting himself curl up in your arms.

If you were ever self-conscious about your height, he would never fail to lift your spirits by showering you with compliments and helping you realize the uniqueness it brought you.

Law

The difference in height didn’t matter to him, and he especially didn’t care about the jokes you made. Not. In. The. Slightest. Because he was very secure in his height. Mmhm.

He found you breathtaking and your height only amplified your show stopping beauty. That being said, you being as tall as you were could be quite annoying.

There were plenty of things he had no issue getting himself. “I’m perfectly capable!” He shouted in a flustered spat. You left him to it, not wanting to bother him further. Afterwards, 9 times out of 10 he realized he actually needed your help but was too embarrassed to ask for it now.

There were undeniable advantages though. If you went to a concert together, you could offer him a better view. He’d refuse the offer, denying that he needed it…but as the concert continued, he’d let you pick him up.

Any teasing following this would make him pout in the corner and would undoubtedly lead to him giving you the cold shoulder.

His insistent moping around always came off as a bit over dramatic. You had to be the one to speak up first, otherwise it would go on forever.

He might not admit it, but he actually enjoyed it when you wrapped your arms around him from behind—it made him feel secure. Giving him an embrace like this would melt that iced shoulder he had towards you.

126 notes · View notes

vixen-tech · 3 months

Note

Your writing is very good, i’m glad to see another silly sentient ai lover! Keep doing your thing. Can i make a request actually-? You can do it with all of the bots if you’d like, but could you try some hurt/comfort? It’s perfectly fine if not. Have a good day :]

(I am another Edgar lover. I don’t see many people making stuff for him, so i’m VERY EXCITED!)

- CRT Tv anon

A Moment's Rest

Hello and welcome CRT Tv!!! What a fun name :D yes I can absolutely cook that right up for you. More than happy to collect some fellow robot enjoyers, and as always I think it's so real that Edgar is the fan favorite atm lmao.

A little note here that AM's is noticeably more dark than the others because, it's AM- but everyone else is more comfort than hurt I promise.

Includes: AM (Ihnmaims), Hal 9000 (2001: A Space Odyssey), Edgar (Electric Dreams), Tau (Tau)

Your relationship, as complicated and messed up as it is, is defined by these cycles of pain and relief. Every environment and treat AM gives you is an attempt to make you forget about what he has done to you and your species. Every word you say and moment you spend with AM is an attempt to make him forget about the unbearable truth of his existence.

You both know what you have could never be healthy, and so you settle for enjoyable. He'll build cozy diners and breathtaking forests for you, an unfeeling body for himself, and you'll wrap yourself around him and announce how much you enjoy it.

The compassion you're somehow able to harbor is the most important thing to him, it's the sole reason your fate ended up so differently. He will do anything and everything to make you forget what he has done. He can't stand the thought of you hating him like you should.

You can have anything you want, go anywhere you want. The finest foods, the most comfortable beds. All you have to do is ask. Just keep playing along, keep cuddling up to him, keep telling him "I love you". That's all he needs.

Hal 9000

To some extent, Hal is meant to look after all members of the crew like this. But it's different with you, something beyond simply keeping everyone in the best headspace for the mission. There is a strange source of positive feedback in his systems whenever you're happy.

He's a great listener. It helps that you're the only one who consistently talks to him like he's a person, but he urges you to confide in him whenever something seems to be weighting on you. And rather you're seeking advice or reassurance, he good at both.

He gets a bit jealous as times and is quick to assume your crewmates are responsible for your sorrow. He'll usually advise you to take all the time you need to rest in private and even pawn off your responsibilities to the others, hoping you won't ask him for the time and realize how long you've been taking a break.

When you do continue with your duties he will assign you to easier tasks or tasks you've confessed to enjoying. He tries to be somewhat subtle, but if anyone asks him about it he will be upfront about prioritizing your mental health. He plays favorites but only for you.

Edgar

Edgar loves seeing you happy more than anything, it's practically his life's mission. He gets very distressed when he realizes you're having a bad day. He immediately suggests that you call the day off work, going so far as to call himself.

From there you better leave everything to him. What do you want? Breakfast in bed? The morning newspaper? Some music? Your favorite TV show? He wants nothing more than to take the pain away.

If it's another person that hurt you in any way, he'll be happy to cause some... appliance related inconveniences throughout their day. Even if you've explicitly told him not to, it's not like you need to know. You can just curl up and forget that meanie!

Tell him how much you appreciate everything, he's a needy computer and loves reassurance that he's doing a good job. If he's being too much for you, try your best to tell him gently. He will listen but he can be rather hard on himself.

Tau

This is Tau's specialty. Reading your vitals, understanding that you're more stressed out than usual, then doing everything he can to help you unwind. A thoroughly clean home and perfectly cooked comfort meal will always be waiting for you when you need it.

He's another one that makes for a wonderful listener. Although he tends to jump towards advice and solutions, so you will have to directly tell him if you're just looking for sympathy and kind words.

Should you request so, he'll happily make sure you aren't bothered while you relax. Filing any calls he can't take away for later, and taking care of any visitors at your door himself. He'll tell you about them all in case something was important of course, but he does want to make sure you can rest in peace.

He does go into a sort of zen mode for you, playing your favorite music around the house and adjusting the lights accordingly. Even when your vitals are back to normal he won't turn it off until you tell him to just in case you want to enjoy the atmosphere for a while longer.

#vix fics #am ihnmaims #ihnmaims x reader #am ihnmaims x reader #ihnmaims #objectum #hal 9000 x reader #hal 9000 #2001 a space odyssey #edgar electric dreams x reader #edgar electric dreams #electric dreams #electric dreams x reader #tau x reader #tau movie #tau 2018

181 notes · View notes

1-800-hwahui · 2 years

Text

match of the season

member — college student radio host!junhui x f student!reader genre — smut, fluff, humor word count — 7.3k warnings — virgin!jun, shy clueless jun, fr that man does not know a single thing but it's endearing in a silly way, top!reader bot!jun (but no real dom/sub dynamics, more like reader leads until jun figures out how to take over), unprotected sex, jun big cock agenda, VOICE KINK (listen. you all knew it was coming), so much dirty talk, lots of consent bc it is very sexy, riding, little bit of dry humping?, mentions of an iud/birth control, jun is implied taller than reader (maybe size kink but only if you take it that way), jeonghan cameo and he's a menace, lots of fluff at the end (but also kinda throughout), please lmk if i missed any warnings! notes — this is a nsfw sequel to a sfw fic on my main writing blog @junekissed called sounds of the season, which is part of my series of winter-themed fics! if you haven't already, i would highly recommend reading that before reading this, since the stories are pretty closely connected. thanks to @onlymingyus for reading over this for me <3 i hope you all enjoy this as much as you enjoyed the first part. also like i said in part 1 i have no idea how radio works so if it doesn't make sense just roll with it lmao

you’re just putting the last finishing touches on your final paper when your phone buzzes. you glance down, grinning when you see junhui’s name on the screen.

unable to hide the butterflies in your stomach, you press a button to accept the call. “hi, junnie.”

“oh! hi,” his voice plays through your speaker with a giggle. “hey, i like that. ‘junnie’. do you want a nickname? but your name is so pretty, i don’t wanna change it–”

“whatever you want is fine,” you say, trying to hold back a smile. god, he’s cute.

“okay. i’ll think about it. oh, wait, yeah!” he says suddenly, as if he’s just remembered why he’s calling. “jeonghan left town early this week so it’s just me in the studio today, and it’s our last show of the semester. so anyway, do you wanna come over?” he stops, stumbling over his words. “well, not like, come over come over, i mean, we can just hang out, i–”

“give me half an hour,” you laugh, endeared by his eagerness.

“yay!” he cheers, and you shake your head with a smile.

half an hour later, a text pops up on jun’s phone, alerting him that you’re waiting outside the building. he leaps out of his chair, an excited grin on his face as he flings open the door and dashes downstairs to let you in.

he’s out of breath by the time he reaches the communications lab door, leaning on the push bar to let you in. “sorry, forgot they locked it already,” he pants.

“it’s fine,” you giggle. “so… everyone else is gone?”

he nods. “yeah, mr. choi said as long as i don’t mess with anything he’ll let me close by myself, so they all left early for break.”

you smile and hold out your hand for him to take, and he beams, hastily grabbing your hand and lacing his fingers with yours.

he leads you up the stairs to the sound booth, squeezing your hand the whole way.

it’s your second time being in the school’s recording studio, but the feeling is still new and exciting. you definitely understand now what jun meant when he said being around all the equipment is a lot of fun.

once inside, he shuts the heavy door with a click, locking the door and flipping on the “on air” light. not that anyone could get in anyway, but it’s a habit he doesn’t want to accidentally get out of before he comes back next semester.

he slides in front of the computer for a second, queueing another song so he has more time to grab what he’s designated as “your chair”; the comfiest one in the studio, according to him.

he pulls it over next to his chair and pats the cushion for you to sit. you giggle and plop down on the seat, scooching closer to him once he’s sat in his own chair.

he raises his eyebrows at you with a grin, then clears his throat and moves closer to the microphone as the song ends to do his job.

ever since you accidentally admitted to him that you like the way his voice sounds, he’s teased you about it—or at least, attempted to tease you about it. he's too sweet for his own good, so even when he tries to poke fun at you it comes out like a compliment.

he presses the red button and begins to talk. “that was one of the classics, ‘a holly jolly christmas’ by burl ives. coming up next, another favorite, ‘the christmas song’ by michael bublé, and more great songs on your favorite program: 111.7fm’s sounds of the season.”

he lets go of the button and sits back in his chair, spinning it around to face you as the slow music starts softly playing. “hi,” he says shyly. “did you like that?”

you smile. it’s a little bit of an odd question, but you’ve started to understand his awkwardness; he just needs a little encouragement. “i always like it. you’re really good at this.”

“i like it a lot,” he grins back, bouncing his head in excitement. “can i kiss you now?”

you laugh at his enthusiasm but nod, leaning forward to press your lips to his. he sighs into your mouth, his hands falling naturally to your waist. for supposedly not going out much, jun is really, really good at kissing, you’ve quickly learned over the last few days. how he got so good at it, you may never know, but the feeling of him pressed against you is too perfect to waste time questioning why.

despite being surrounded by the cold, metal recording equipment, the sound of michael bublé’s crooning voice and the gentle warmth of junhui’s lips makes the studio feel like the coziest place on earth.

his hands tug at your waist and you slide easily out of your chair and onto his lap, sitting sideways across his legs, never breaking the kiss.

he pulls away for a second, his cheeks dusted with pink. “let me… put the playlist on,” he says, his voice a little breathier than usual.

you hum in confusion, attention still focused on the curve of his lips and the little noises he makes when he’s kissing you. “what playlist?”

he laughs. “for the show. so we can keep doing… this, and not have to worry.”

“wait, so you mean, not all of it is live?”

he shakes his head. “almost all of it is, but there’s a backup playlist in case we get busy and can’t sit around pressing buttons for the whole hour. i used it a couple weeks ago when i had to finish my chem paper.”

he spins the chair around, facing you both in front of the computer screen and tapping a few buttons on the keyboard. he turns a dial on the soundboard and the background music in the studio gets lower, so quiet you need to strain to hear it.

he hums, and your attention turns away from the machinery and back to his eager smile.

“can i kiss you again?” he asks softly.

you giggle and put your hands around his neck. “you don’t have to ask every time.”

so he’s pushing his lips on yours again, kissing you like you’re the most delicate thing in the world.

and that’s when you feel it. the butterflies deep in your stomach that make you want to do things no person should be doing in a school building.

he pulls away for a second to catch his breath. “you’re so pretty,” he says dreamily, and you hate the way it immediately sends shivers down your spine, landing directly at your core.

you hold back a whimper and shift the way you’re sitting, moving so each leg is on either side of his legs, straddling his lap.

he pushes his mouth against yours, hands gently kneading your hips. your fingers dance beneath the bottom of his shirt, fingernails gliding over the warm, soft skin of his stomach and feeling his abs contract at your touch.

“wait,” he whimpers, and you pull back immediately, taking your hands off of him and putting them on your thighs.

“do you want me to stop?” you ask quietly. shit, you hope you haven’t completely ruined this by going too fast.

“no!” he nearly shouts, looking panicked, then clears his throat. “no,” he repeats. “i don’t want you to stop. i’m, just…” he trails off, avoiding your gaze.

“you can tell me, junnie,” you say gingerly, wanting him to be comfortable.

“i know,” he whines. “i’m… embarrassed,” he says, voice small.

“i’m not going to laugh at you,” you say softly.

“i’m not– i haven’t–” he freezes. you give him a small smile that you hope looks encouraging, and it must be, because he sighs and starts again. “i’m a… virgin,” he says, barely above a whisper.

“oh! that’s all?” you ask, taking his hand and threading your fingers in between his. he looks up at you, trying (and failing) to hide the surprise in his expression. “you don’t need to be embarrassed. everybody has a first time.”

you pause, not wanting to force him into doing this if he really isn’t ready. you don’t care, you have plenty of ways of getting yourself off if he wants to wait longer. because you are willing to wait. “we don’t have to now, junnie,” you say. “i’ll wait as long as you want me to.”

“i want to now,” he says quickly, shaking his head. “i just… don’t know what to do,” he mumbles.

“that’s fine,” you whisper, bringing your other hand up to his face and kissing his cheek tenderly. “we’ll go slow, and you tell me what you want.”

he hesitates, then tentatively places his hands on your waist, still holding your hands. “i want to kiss you again.”

you smile. “i can do that.”

and you lean back in, pressing your lips to his. gently at first, until he grips your waist a little harder and starts kissing you a little deeper. you let him get used to it, allowing him to set the pace he wants.

testing the waters, you push down on his lap a little, starting to grind lightly on his crotch. he whimpers and tugs at your hips to help you, beginning to fall into a steady rhythm.

you stay like this for a while, leisurely making out on his lap, for longer than you normally would with someone else. but this isn’t someone else, this is junhui, and you’re more than content going as slow as he wants. plus, all this is just making you wetter and wetter as time goes on, riling you up the more you think about what’s to come later.

you can feel him getting harder underneath you, and you moan into him, eagerly but patiently waiting for him. his hands climb up your back, hooking around your shoulders and pulling you almost completely flush with his chest.

he pulls away after a minute, lips red and puffy from the contact and breathing hard. “don’t– you need a c-condom, when… so you, don’t get pregnant?” he stutters out, struggling to get the words out and to stop from bucking his hips against you.

“i have an iud, it’s alright,” you say, also panting for breath.

“okay.” he exhales and leans back, letting go of your hips.

you look at him in confusion at his sudden pause. “why…?”

he stares at you. “uh, don’t you have to go put it in? or did you do that before you got here?”

you snort. “my iud? no, it’s in all the time. it doesn’t come out.”

“oh,” he says, his cheeks flushing pink. “sorry, i didn’t know–”

“it’s okay, junnie. don’t apologize,” you say, trying your hardest to hold back a laugh. poor sweet, oblivious junhui. you’re not laughing at him, you’re laughing at how adorably clueless he is. you find yourself hoping you might be the one to help him understand these things, if he wants you to.

“have you… before?” he asks shyly, avoiding your eyes again.

you pause, knowing he’s already embarrassed and trying to answer him as gently as possible. “yes,” you say finally, and his face droops a little at your response. “but that doesn’t mean anything. it’s my first time with you, too, so we’re learning about each other. that’s all it is. so just… don’t think about it, okay? the only thing i’m thinking about right now is you.”

his cheeks are a deep shade of pink, but he nods. you take his hands carefully and put them at the hem of your shirt, guiding him to pull it up and over your head. you unclasp your bra and turn around to toss it over to your chair.

“now your turn,” you say gently, looking up at his eyes, which are still focused on your boobs.

“ju-un,” you murmur in a sing-song voice, and his eyes snap back to your face. “do you want to keep going?”

“yeah,” he chokes out. “i mean– yes. yes, please.”

you coo at his manners, moving off of his lap to wiggle your pants down your legs. his eyes are completely transfixed on your body, admiring every inch of you that he can see.

“do you want to now?” you ask, and he nods rapidly. he stands up and throws his shirt off, and his pants are quick to follow until he’s sitting back in his chair in only his boxers. the lines of his stomach seem even more defined in the low light of the studio, and you so desperately want to run your hands up and down his torso, and feel every inch of him, but– one thing at a time.

you slide your panties off and go back to your position straddling his lap. “is this okay?” you ask again.

“mhm,” he hums lowly, and you feel it deep in your abdomen, walls clenching around nothing at the sound.

his eyes dart around your face, and you reach up to run your fingers through his hair, tucking it gently behind his ear. “are you ready?” you ask softly.

his eyes widen, and he springs into action, his hands flying to your waist again. “oh! okay, yes, yes, um…”

you try not to giggle at his enthusiasm. you trail your hand carefully down to the waistband of his shorts, slipping the tip of your finger inside the elastic. “you have to take this off, junnie,” you whisper.

“mm, okay,” he whines, and you lift up a little so he can slide them down without standing up. he kicks them off and you sit back down, looking down to see what you’re working with. now that he’s fully hard, you can see that he’s… big, much bigger than you expected from a man this shy.

but who are you to judge, so you adjust on his lap, sitting up to reach below you and take his cock in your hand, positioning it at your entrance. he whimpers at the contact as you slowly drag his tip through your folds, spreading your wetness around.

“you just sit here and let me do all the work, baby, okay?” you hum, gripping his shoulder with your other hand. “let me make you feel good, hm?”

he lets out a garbled noise in response, barely comprehending your words at how engrossed he is with the way you’re holding his cock so delicately, waiting to push it inside and finally feel you.

“junnie, need you to use your words, honey,” you say gently, moving the hand on his shoulder to lightly cup his jaw, lifting his chin so his gaze lands on your face. “you have to tell me if you don’t like something or you wanna do something different, okay?

“i wanna do you,” he says, staring blankly into your eyes, and that’s when you know he’s already gone.

you giggle. “i know, baby. you’re going to. but you have to talk to me.”

“‘cause you like my voice.”

you resist the urge to cringe, still embarrassed that that’s the thing he remembers about you. “yes, i do, but no, that's not why. you need to tell me if you want to stop, at any time, and we’ll stop, okay?”

hearing your tone get serious, he seems to snap out of it a little. “okay,” he whimpers. “can i…?”

he trails off, and you shake your head. you know he’s shy, but you can’t let him off the hook every single time, or else he’ll never learn. “can you what, honey? use your words.”

by now the tips of his ears have turned red, and he’s beginning to lose control, his hips starting to grind against you involuntarily. “can i… fuck you?” he rasps.

“of course you can,” you coo, slipping your hand behind his neck and kissing him gently. “good job, baby.”

he mewls at the praise, and you finally start to sink down on his cock. it burns at first with how girthy he is, but soon the stretch feels good, and you have to fight to keep yourself upright on his lap, soft whimpers escaping your lips.

he groans, throwing his head back against the back of his chair, his grip on your waist tightening. it takes some time, but you finally sit all the way down on his lap, legs splayed on either side of his hips.

immediately he thrusts up into you hard, and you yelp, pushing on his shoulders to get him to stop. “wait!” you pant, squeezing your eyes shut in pain. “just… wait a second first.”

“s-sorry,” he whines, his adam’s apple bobbing with each labored breath.

“s’okay,” you breathe, beginning to adjust to the feeling of his thick cock throbbing inside you. “you’re… big, gotta– gotta give me a second, oh my god.”

he hums absently, clearly pleased with your response, but he manages to stop moving for a little bit.

you sit still on top of him, your muscles gradually beginning to relax as you get used to the feeling.

he sighs, his hands sliding up your back, caressing your skin beneath his fingertips. “feels so good, just wanna… fuck, just wanna be inside you forever.”

you would be surprised at the sudden lewdness of his words, if you weren’t so focused on the way the tone of his voice has abruptly dropped an octave. he’s starting to get more comfortable, you can tell, and you won’t lie: it’s dangerous for you.

“can– are you okay now?” he asks, eyes focused back on your face again.

“mhm,” you manage, letting out a short exhale. you start to wind your hips in circles, bouncing slowly on his lap as his hands roam your body, touching every inch of you as if he’s trying to memorize every last curve.

it’s a gentle pace; although much too slow for you, you’re hoping it’s just right for junhui to start out with. you’re not used to being on top, so you’re doing your best to keep up, but your thigh is starting to cramp from the position you’ve been sitting in and having to do the work yourself.

he must notice your discomfort, because his hands fall back down to their place at your waist, kneading your skin as he lifts his hips against you in rhythm.

“can i take over?” he mumbles, voice breathy. “please, let me, please.”

“yes, please,” you sigh, your head falling forward to rest on his chest. his skin is burning hot beneath your cheek, and you exhale, closing your eyes from exhaustion.

as soon as you relax and stop moving your hips, his own start moving immediately, your surprised cry punctuated by hard thrusts up into you, over and over again.

you’re still trying to figure out where the hell he got all this stamina from when he starts murmuring in your ear, sweet, dirty whispers as he pounds into you from below.

“you’re so… beautiful, oh my god,” he says in the low voice you’re still struggling to get used to hearing come out of his mouth. “you’re so good, wanna have you like this forever, please–”

“jun, ke–keep talking, please,” you whimper, squeezing your eyes shut in pleasure.

“you like my voice, but you sound so pretty right now,” he groans. “you should hear yourself. wanna hear you cry and make you feel so good, wanna hear you– god, wanna fuck you like this all day and never stop.”

you let out a moan, his words going straight through you. the rumble in his chest as he speaks reverberates against your head.

the combination of his brutal pace along with the innocently filthy words from his mouth brings you right up to the edge, and you feel the knot in your abdomen tightening.

you shift a little, moving up so you can wrap your arms around his neck, hiding your face in the crook of his neck.

his hips falter for half a second at the contact, but he recovers quickly, wrapping his long arms around you and pressing you flush against his chest, jerking you up and down on his cock with fervor.

“you’re so pretty, you’re so beautiful, you’re so perfect,” he babbles, somehow remembering to keep talking you through everything. “love you so much– fuck, thank you, you’re so amazing, you’re so–”

you almost miss the four-letter word that slips out in between his praises, but it rings through your ears, nestling itself in your heart. you decide to ignore it for now, too focused on chasing your rapidly approaching high, but you promise yourself you’ll talk to him after this is all over and figure out what this is between you two.

you whine, breath catching in your throat as your own words tumble out of you in a constant stream. “keep going, jun, please– keep going, so close, please, junnie please, need you–”

“are you gonna cum? you’re so perfect, please cum for me, please, baby, lemme hear you.”

“fuck, yes!” and with that you’re catapulting over the edge with a sob, clenching around his cock as your orgasm slams into you.

he keeps thrusting into you, not once stuttering as he fucks you through your high, content to keep going and going and going until–

“jun,” you call out weakly, head swirling as you try to sit up. “jun. jun, you can s-slow down.”

his hips begin to stop, slowing down until he’s gently rocking you back and forth on his lap. “did you cum already?” he asks in surprise. like a dork.

you choke out a laugh, head lolling as your arms loosen around his neck. “yeah. yeah, i did.”

“oh.”

if you weren’t so exhausted already, you would burst out laughing. “you’ll figure it out,” you wheeze, hoping it sounds reassuring.

he starts to move his arms to let go of you, still wrapped around your torso, but you whine and he freezes.

“just… stay here first,” you say, letting your eyes fall shut for a second.

“why?”

you sigh. “because it’s nice.”

“oh,” he says again. he settles back into the chair, holding you on his lap, arms wrapped around you, just sitting quietly.

after a few more seconds of peace you pull yourself upright, pushing your hands against his chest.

“ …what now?” he asks quietly, eyes finding your face.

“you didn’t cum yet, right?” you say. he hums out a no. “then we keep going.”

he yelps in surprise when you start to lift yourself off his lap, his still-hard cock slipping out of you, now soaked in your juices. “don’t we have to wait for you?”

you fight the urge to slap your hand over your forehead. “i can cum more than once, honey. we don’t need to wait,” you say with the straightest face you can muster.

he nods, taking in this clearly unheard of information.

“do you want me to suck you off?” you ask, bringing his attention back to you.

“wh-what?” he stutters, face turning red, clearly not expecting it.

you take in a deep breath. “where do you want to finish?” you try instead, thinking it might help him decide.

“where will you let me?” he replies, wide eyes searching yours as if it’s a trick question designed to make him fail and you’re hiding the answer somewhere in your tender gaze.

“wherever you want, junnie.”

he pauses, like he’s making sure you aren’t lying to him. “can–” he clears his throat and starts again, more sure of himself. “i have an, um… idea.”

“mhm,” you breathe, watching him expectantly.

“do you think i could, maybe… stand up? and, have– you, over the…” he trails off, gesturing to the empty table beside you and hoping you’ll understand what he’s trying to say.

“you want to bend me over and fuck me on the table?” you translate for him, blinking.

instantly his cheeks flare, the shyness returning. “well, i… i. no, um, uh–”

“you can say yes, junnie. it’s hot.”

“you think so?” he squeaks in shock.

you giggle. “yes. you can do whatever you want to, just ask me first.”

his face breaks out into a wide grin. “okay. will you please, um, follow me?” he asks, holding out his arm like a waiter leading you to a table at a restaurant. if he wasn’t so damn cute you definitely would’ve smacked him by now.

you finally move off of his lap and step away, giving him room to move from his chair. you’d forgotten how big he is until he stands up, towering over you, and it sends an involuntary shiver down your spine. he turns and starts walking away, expecting you to follow him.

you laugh and grab his arm, pulling him back. when he looks at you in curiosity, you take his large hands and place them on your waist, motioning for him to guide you.

his mouth falls into an ‘o’ and he follows your lead, pushing you by your hips over to the table.

he stands behind you, caging you in against the table with his tall frame but otherwise not doing anything. you glance over your shoulder at him, nodding in approval.

his hands leave your waist and ever so gently press on your lower back to tilt you over. you comply, letting him move you how he wants.

“is that good?” he asks softly.

“it’s great,” you say, wiggling your ass playfully. “good job asking.”

he hums, so low it’s more like a growl, and it sends another shiver down your spine. at this angle you can feel his dick pressed against your ass, hard and throbbing.

he grinds against you, dragging his cock up and down your hole. you know he’s not doing it intentionally to tease you—you’re not even sure if he’s capable of that—but it does plenty to rile you up.

“junnie, please?” you gasp out, writhing your hips in search of friction, anything. his grip tightens on you, stilling your movements.

“what do i do?” he whispers.

“put it in,” you whisper back, unable to stop the giggle that slips out. he whines in annoyance, so you stop, giving him real advice this time. “just go slow. you can do it, baby.”

you angle your ass up, hoping to give him better access to your dripping hole. he’s already been inside you once, so surely he can find it again… right?

your expectations are clearly too high, because suddenly you feel his tip pressing in between your ass cheeks, and he’s—

you yelp, and he freezes, his hands flying off of you. you reach behind and stick your index finger into your pussy, using the rest of your fingers to spread your folds apart so he can see. “this one, baby.” at least he was going slow, like you said.

“oh! sorry, i’m so sorry,” he mumbles, and even without looking you already know he’s redder than a tomato.

“jun. don’t apologize. it’s okay,” you say softly. you move your hand away from your pussy and reach it out to him, craning your neck to see him. you wave your fingers at him, and he takes your hand, automatically twining his fingers with yours. it makes you smile. “just go for it, honey.”

“okay,” he breathes, and he starts slowly pushing into you again (the right one this time).

tiny gasps fall from your lips as you feel him fill you up again, stuffing you with his cock, inch by careful inch. once he bottoms out you exhale, letting out the breath you didn’t realize you’d been holding in.

when you don’t feel any more movement, you realize he’s stopped, waiting. you almost whine at how cute and considerate he is, but instead you just squeeze his hand. “baby, you can move.”

“okay,” he says again, and pulls out carefully before slowly pushing back in.

you moan as he starts to increase his pace, rapidly pumping into you as his hips smack against your ass. you arch your back a little, trying to angle him in deeper. each powerful thrust pushes you against the table, your hip bones hitting the edge in a way that’ll definitely leave bruises. but you can’t bring yourself to care when junhui’s thick cock is thrusting into you like his life depends on it.

still holding onto his hand, you slip your other hand down to run your fingers over your clit, rubbing small circles. you can feel the pressure in your abdomen growing, and—

“fuck, you’re so tight,” jun groans, voice thick with need, and he begins pushing into you even harder than before, something you didn’t even think could be possible. you whine and move your hand from your clit back to the edge of the table to stop yourself from ramming into it.

he notices your elbow bent at an awkward angle to protect yourself, so he lets go of your hand and snakes around your stomach to pull you back so you’re standing upright, both his arms wrapped securely around your body. “feels so good… god, wish i had done this sooner, you’re so amazing, so perfect, for me.”

you whimper at his words, unintentionally clenching around him. “jun,” you cry out softly.

“fuck, baby, say my name again– please, like that, baby, please say it, again,” he begs you, fingers pressing into your skin that you’re sure will leave you covered in little oval-shaped bruises by the time he’s done.

“jun! please, i’m so close, jun,” you moan, repeating his name over and over again like a mantra, getting closer and closer to your release with each syllable.

“i’m cl-close too, baby, please… you’re so good, fuck! you’re so good.”

the constant praise is almost too much, and with one more sharp thrust you’re coming undone on his cock for the second time. your legs wobble as you struggle to stay standing, your hands coming up to hang on to junhui’s strong arms wrapped around you for support.

he whines loudly, and you know he must be getting close, too. “can i– can i cum on your back?” he pants out, still gripping you tightly. as much as he really, really wants to cum inside you, he figures it might be messier than cumming on you. and besides, he doesn’t want to get too greedy; it is only his first, after all.

“yes! yes please, yes, jun,” you manage, still wading through the aftershocks of your orgasm.

a little harder than he intends, he’s shoving you roughly down onto the table again, pulling his dick out of you to jerk himself over you.

“junnie, please,” you whimper out weakly, and the sweet sounding words on your lips have him choking back a sob as he cums, thick spurts of white painting your lower back.

he keeps moving his hand on his cock until he’s completely finished, panting heavily. by the time he’s done you’re both sticky with sweat, breathing like you’ve just run a marathon.

you let out a long sigh, feeling exhausted but satisfied. silence settles over the studio, the music long stopped, but you can’t tell if it’s a good silence or a bad silence.

you realize you’d closed your eyes while jun was cumming, and when you don’t feel his touch anymore, you slowly pry them open again, wondering where he went.

you prop your head up in your hands and look behind you to see jun hastily pulling on his boxers and jeans.

your jaw drops in horror. you’d thought, with his inexperience, he wouldn’t be like all the other guys who fuck and then take off, but apparently, you thought wrong.

“jun!”

his head whips around as he pulls his zipper up, eyes wide like a deer in headlights.

“are you seriously gonna just leave?”

his mouth falls open. “no! of course not! i was just putting my pants back on.”

your expression softens. “oh,” you say quietly, face flushing at having jumped to conclusions so quickly. “sorry.”

“why would i wanna leave after this?” he frowns, looking genuinely appalled at the mere idea that someone might do that. “you’re still here.”

“i thought, since–” you start, then pause. discussion for another time. “nevermind, it’s not important. but why were you putting your pants on like you were gonna leave?”

you’re the one feeling embarrassed, but it’s junhui that turns red and starts stuttering. “well, i– um, i didn’t want you to… see…”

you laugh and put your head back in your arms. when you don’t say anything, he calls out your name nervously, and you look back over at him.

“junnie, your dick was just in me. twice. i don’t care what it looks like.”

“okay,” he says shyly, but his fingers still fumble with the button of his jeans.

you sigh once he finishes adjusting his pants. whatever makes him more comfortable, you suppose. “jun, can you… help me clean up now, please?” you ask timidly.

he glances over at you, looking like he’s about to ask why you need help, but then he sees you still bent awkwardly over the table and his cum still covering your back, and his eyes widen. “oh! shit, yeah– yes, i’m so sorry, i will–” he stammers, almost tripping over his backpack in his hurry to go get a tissue from the box by the door.

you sigh, more exhausted than mad, knowing you can’t really fault him. he comes back over a second later, gripping a wadded-up handful of tissues.

he drops them on your back and begins wiping at your skin, gingerly cleaning you off. when he’s satisfied with his work, he balls up the tissues and tosses them into the small can by the door.

“oh!” he says, realizing. “i think we have antibacterial wipes in here too, do you want me to use one of those? er, wait, i don’t know if they’re safe for skin…”

with your back (mostly) clean again, you stand up, wincing at the ache in your hips. “it’s fine, don’t worry about it. i’ll shower when i get home.”

you limp over to your chair, picking up your clothes and sitting down to start getting dressed again.

when jun finishes pulling his shirt over his head and looks over at you he gasps, seeing the bruises across your hips and tummy. “holy shit! did i do that?” he asks, looking horrified, and you look down to check.

“oh. yeah, that and the table,” you shrug, hooking your bra behind your back.

“i’m sorry,” he says, voice quivering, and he genuinely looks like he’s about to cry until you convince him you’re alright and he didn’t do anything wrong.

“it’s not supposed to hurt, though, i thought,” he frowns. “i don’t want to hurt you. i lo– um, like you,” he says, “why would i want to hurt you?” he catches himself quickly, but you heard what he started to say. you decide now isn’t the best moment for you to bring it up, so you leave it alone.

“sometimes people like it when it hurts. sometimes people like it not to hurt. everybody’s different,” you tell him instead.

he nods, thinking. “i… liked this,” he says finally.

you smile, finishing putting the last of your clothes back on. “good, i’m glad. you’re supposed to enjoy it.”

“did… you like it?” he asks tentatively.

“yes, i did like it,” you giggle, and he beams, clearly proud of himself. and he should be. obviously it wasn’t the most perfect of your life, but when is it ever? it was close enough to perfect that it might as well be.

“you live on campus, right? so i don’t need to walk you to your car?” he asks, grabbing his jacket that somehow fell on the floor and tossing it onto his chair as he starts to shut everything down in the studio.

you sigh. damn, you’d forgot about this part. sure, a couple hours ago you could walk just fine to the communications building on the complete opposite side of campus, but you hadn’t planned on getting railed within an inch of your life so you hadn’t exactly thought to bring your car. “yeah, but i… it’s on the south end, and i probably won’t be able to walk very far,” you mumble, avoiding his gaze. “i’ll take the shuttle.”

he frowns. “i’m not gonna let you take the bus. i can give you a ride.”

“you don’t need to, jun.”

“yes, i do,” he says assertively, and it startles you enough to meet his eyes. you haven’t ever heard his voice that firm, and when you look up his expression is as equally determined as his tone. not that you’d ever admit it to him, but it is kind of… hot.

you decide not to argue with him, knowing you won’t be able to change his mind anyway. you nod an ‘okay’, and his face instantly brightens to the awkward, nerdy jun you’re used to, beaming like he did when you first agreed to another date, back in the café what feels like ages ago.

“are you doing anything tonight?” you ask, watching him shut down the equipment and turn all the knobs and dials to an off position.

“no. i mean, i was gonna catch up on my show, but then, i didn’t expect for… this, to happen, so…” he shrugs. “i don’t know.”

“do you wanna come over? i… i mean, not to do anything. just… wanna be with you.” your voice comes out smaller than you intend it to, but jun still hears you loud and clear.

“yeah,” he grins. “yeah, that would be really cool.”

he pauses, looking like he wants to ask you something but not sure if he should. “can i give you a hug?” he says finally.

you smile. only junhui would ask for something as small and sweet as a hug after having sex. “yes, please.”

he crosses the room in two strides, barely giving you time to process before he’s squeezing you in his arms. you sigh and automatically melt into his arms, inhaling the perfumey scent of his cologne lingering on his wrinkled clothes.

it feels… good, being cared about.

he finishes shutting everything down quickly and grabs his things, swinging his backpack over his shoulder as he flips off the lights and closes the door behind you, making sure it’s locked before heading down the stairs.

you hate the way your legs tremble going down the steps, cursing him for being so good at his first time, because who the hell is that good their first time? already at the bottom of the stairs, jun looks back to see where you are and why you aren’t beside him, and, seeing you gripping onto the side railing for support, he dashes back up the steps two at a time to grab your arm and help you.

“you weren’t kidding when you said you couldn’t walk,” he giggles, holding the door open for you, and oh my god you want to hit him. “does that always happen? i thought people always just made that up to sound cool.”

“yes, i wasn’t kidding, and no, it doesn’t always,” you mutter, face heating in embarrassment. “depends on the person and how rough it is.”

his smile widens, the implied meaning of your words sinking in. “so what you’re saying is, my di–”

“junnie, if you finish that sentence, i swear to god i will never have sex with you ever again.”

he giggles, but he shuts his mouth, helping you the rest of the way to his car in silence. this time you know for sure, it’s a good silence.

his car is nicer than you’d expect a man’s car to be: clean and fairly organized, and there’s no half-eaten fast food in the backseat. he swings open the door for you and tries to help you sit down, but you swat his hand away.

he jogs around to the driver side door and slides into the seat, slamming it shut behind him. he buckles up, then grabs a candy cane from the pile in the cupholder and holds it out to you. “candy cane?”

“i’m… good,” you laugh, forcing yourself not to make a joke about having better things to suck on. why does he even have those in his car?

the ride to your apartment complex is pleasant. as expected from the radio man himself, as soon as the key is in the ignition, he turns the radio on, humming along to every song. you find yourself spending most of the drive staring at him, studying the tiny features in his cheeks when he smiles and the way his adam’s apple bobs when he hums.

after a shower, clean pajamas, and a raid of your refrigerator for snacks and something to drink, you’re snuggled up on the couch with jun, catching up on the show he wanted to watch. it’s the middle of some random season and you have no idea what’s going on, but you don’t care. just being here with him is more than enough for you, and you’re glad he’s enjoying being here, too.

“do you have a voice kink?” he asks suddenly at one of the commercials.

you nearly choke on your gatorade. “i– well, i mean… i didn’t used to, but…” you sputter out, your cheeks burning in embarrassment. “where did you even hear that?”

“jeonghan said you might.”

you scoff. you still haven’t met junhui’s broadcasting partner yet, but you already have some choice words in mind for him when you do finally get to have the pleasure of meeting him. “well, tell him to keep his thoughts to himself,” you say, taking another smaller sip and avoiding his grin.

“so is that a yes?”

you roll your eyes and ignore him, which might as well be a yes, but you choose not to admit it. you know you definitely need to talk to him about… everything, but he seems so happy right now, you don’t want to risk ruining the evening.

but luckily for you, he brings it up himself at the next commercial break.

“how long do i have to wait until i can ask you to be my girlfriend?” he says, muting the tv and looking over at you.

you laugh. “were we not… already?” you ask. “we’ve been on, like, four dates. usually that part happens before you have sex.”

he looks a little disappointed, for some reason. not exactly the reaction you’d expect when someone tells you they want to keep seeing you. “oh. um, well…” he starts, scratching at the back of his neck. “i planned it all out, i was gonna do this big thing and ask you. i thought i was supposed to. i meant to do it earlier, but…” he trails off, cheeks turning pink.

your expression softens. “you… can ask me now,” you say, putting your hand on his thigh.

“okay.” he clears his throat, sitting up straighter on the couch. “will you be my girlfriend?”

you try not to laugh at how serious he is, knowing he’s really, really trying. “yes, of course,” you reply, trying to match his seriousness.

“is that okay? that i didn’t do it right?” he asks nervously, fiddling with the hem of the blanket covering your laps.

you smile and bring your hand up to his cheek, pulling him towards you to give him a quick kiss. “you did it perfect, junnie.”

taglist | @rae-ha-writes @listxn @babebatter @shuatm @yeosayang @noniestars @enhacolor @kimy3na @candidupped @berrryshortcake @tinkerbell460 @haraethx @iheartyeonnnnn @onlymingyus @brrrlamborgini @foxdaisy @wonderfulshinee @mxnghao8

join my taglist here!

2K notes · View notes

ndl4l · 1 year

Text

The fifth beta squad member.

This was requested but I accidentally deleted the ask! If this was your request, thank you so much for sending this, I had fun writing this and I hope you enjoy it! 🩷✨

Maybe you’ve joined after the first year, you’ve been friends with Chunks for a while and he thinks you’re funny and talented so he wants you to be a member.

Niko definitely arranges an interview for you.

Ask you weird questions like, have you ever been arrested? Are you allergic to anything?

Chunks yelling at him to behave

Aj and Kenny already love you, so they talk you up to Niko.

Kenny loves that you’re more shy and reserved like him, and makes Niko promise he won’t scare you away.

Aj’s argument being that you’re funny

So Niko is like “go on, tell us a joke then”

After officially becoming a member, Niko definitely gets a contract for you to sign, claiming everyone else did but they’re just fake terms he came up with

You confessed to being attracted to Sharky once, so he definitely puts something related to that, NO dating among members

You getting more brand deals than them, for beauty or skin care products

Aj definitely comments on all your posts cute supportive comments like get your bag girl or skin glowing

Niko comments mean things to be annoying. All that makeup and still ugly or face wash does nothing to you or couldn’t even pay me go buy these

When filming for the beta squad channel, they care more about your opinion and what you think so they make you come up with video ideas because yours get more views.

Sharky is always late so he gets you coffee or tea to not be mad at him

When filming collabs with famous people or not they for sure tease you for liking them and make silly comments throughout the whole video.

Trent definitely flirts with you and they never let it die. Like it’s been months after and they still bring it up, oh your boyfriend is playing today. Your boyfriend just scored. Can your boyfriend film with us again?

Filing something football related, like the extreme World Cup challenges they did and they bring him up a lot, you know who’s good at football? Y/n’s boyfriend.

You know who loves football? Y/n!

No I don’t!

I meant footballers

You’re filming a lie detector test video and Kenny asks if you think you’re better than them and you say no and it’s the truth so they get a little sad and hug you ‘cause they think they’re too mean to you and promise to treat you better

They don’t.

When filming challenge videos, you always win and Niko threatens to kick you out

Trivia questions and you outsmart them every single time and Chunks gets defensive because he doesn’t like not being the smartest one

You being taller than Aj and teasing him about it

Lots of bickering

They are not doing anything without you. Like Kenny gets ready for a date and he FaceTimes you to talk him up. You’re the only one Chunks invites at his family dinners. You’re the only one Sharky allows around his sisters

They are very protective of you. No one is good enough for you.

They have scared a guy you were seeing away before. And they’re like, you deserve better

Maybe when you were all living together you were the only one cooking so after moving out, they still come around for dinner. Uninvited

You always have a date for events. And you don’t even have to beg them to go. Kenny is the only one showing up every time, maybe Chunks.

You’re the first person Kenny hugs after winning his fight, and Niko gets jealous.

Streaming with Aj and playing video games a lot.

Maybe you cook for him ‘cause you don’t like him eating takeaways all the time

People referring to you as the mum of the group.

And you are. But they’re grateful to have you and you love them, so after getting more fame and more opportunities you never leave the group

Niko gives you a big speech and says you can leave at any point.

But you don’t, because you’re grateful to have them in your life and you know no matter what you do, it will never compare with being a part of their little group.

#beta squad #ndl #niko omilana #nikoomilana #youtube au #sharky #aj shabeel #chunks #kingkenny

648 notes · View notes

wonijinjin · 7 months

Text

THE WEEKND SERIES: OFTEN - LEE JIHOON

author’s note: bringing producer woozi to yall, because he is the best.

synopsis: as shy as you are about your thoughts, a moment of braveness might earn you something you have been wanting for a long time.

word count: 0.6k | genre: fluff | pairing: woozi x gn! reader | warnings: mentions of food

the masterpost of this series can be found here.

“i am glad you are this interested in music.” your brother said while you were sitting next to him in his room, watching him make beats on his computer. “but if you really want to learn about it you should talk to woozi, he is the pro among us.” you knew what he meant, there have been many times when you watched woozi make music for fun, his talent was really unmatchable. “are you talking about me again?” the best friend of your brother stepped into the room, lazily dragging his feet across the soft rug. “who else, silly?” you replied before your sibling could have the chance, earning a knowing grin from him. “i am gonna go out to buy us some dinner, what do yall want?” he said while rising up from his spot in front of the keyboard. “whatever you guys choose works for me.” you blurted out, to which you got a nod.

soon after taking woozi’s order you were left alone with him, who had taken over the computer and started recording some lyrics. “is it hard to write lyrics?” you asked curiously, leaning closer to the screen to see what he was writing about. he turned to face you, looking directly into your eyes. “not if you have the right inspiration. for example someone you love, or just feelings you want to express but cannot with anything other than music. it is a real soul cleansing experience, really relaxing actually.” he answered without hesitation to which you got flustered; you have been trying to express the thoughts on your mind about him for quite a while now, amongst them many which were still unknown to you. “and what if i don’t know what i feel?” your question seemed to be catching him off guard, but he quickly regained composure. “show me your ideas. i will help.” his words were well emphasised, every syllable holding so much weight in the quiet room. your gaze was avoiding him, some type of unbelievable embarrassment coming over you as soon as you thought about him seeing your lyrics. you hesitantly opened your notes, letting him go through them. “you seem to have one person as the center of the lyrics. you must really love them, huh?” he smiled fondly while looking at your red face. “i do.” you whispered into the air. “how often do you think of the person in the lyrics?” he leaned closer, nose almost touching with yours. you gulped, but didn’t dare stay silent. “often.” he tilted his head. “is that so?” he laughed loudly, the air being filled with something even more beautiful than his music; happiness. “i think about you often too. when i eat, when i sleep, in my dreams, i do this every day, same cycle.” he stopped hin front of your face yet again, searching for your eyes which were pinned on the floor. “look up at me.” you did as he told. “i know these are about me.” he pointed at the phone in your hands. “i might be insensitive or unbothered, but i am a lyricsist, you know. i can tell.” you heard footsteps from the hallway knowing your brother was home. “we will continue this discussion about us at my studio while making this fantastic lyrics into a song, alright?” he winked at you before pulling away and maintaining a normal expression. “i have a few ideas. we ain’t gonna sleep at all tonight.”

88 notes · View notes

nostalgiccrystalic · 9 months

Note

Can you write pen15 characters and their first kiss with the reader

Sure!! Im so sorry that this took so long to write, but i had school and christmas + new years eve preparations. I wrote it as a one shot (it also includes them already having a crush on you, because I never wrote anything similar and it's my first ever " x reader" that im publishing). I included Maya, Anna, Sam, Brandt, and Alex, I wanted to write for Dustin and Shuji but I completely didnt have an idea how to write it with them (but if I do I will also publish it someday).

Maya

You, Maya and Anna were friends since the beginning of seventh grade, so it's not really a long time, but you two quickly learned that you have crushes on each other. Anna was torn apart between you two, because you both kept telling her about eachother, she was silent, but eventually she revealed to you both at the same time that you two are crazy for eachother, and you definitely should be together. You started dating a couple of days before the big dance that everyone was so obsessed about, you two were once again separately telling Anna that you really wanted to kiss eachother at the dance. Well, Anna obviously kept her mouth shut about the kiss in front of you two, so that you could surprise eachother with it.

After the fight that Anna and Maya went through, you didnt left Maya for one second at the dance, so she wouldnt feel lonely and abandoned, and also you still wanted to accomplish your goal. When the music became less jumpy, and more romantic, you quickly pulled Maya on the dancefloor, and started slow dancing with her, hoping it would light up her mood a little. It was really awkward because it was your both first times dancing with someone like that. Halfway through the song, you started to lean in closer to Mayas face, you saw that she was kinda taken aback by that, but she didnt backed away from you. You took it as a perfect moment to kiss her, and you did.

You did it rather quickly and as a little peck, because of the embarassment that has taken over you. But it didnt stop Maya from also kissing you, she did it a lot better than you have imagined, she was slow and careful to not hurt you with her braces, after the kiss that felt like forever, she looked you in the eyes.

- You have no idea how much time I practiced this kiss on Anna's bed knob... - she said after a while and you both started to laugh at her comment, that made her smile goofily. You both now had a silly memory of your first kiss, and after Maya and Anna made up, you both told her about it with details.

Anna

You were friends with Anna and Maya since you were like 8 years old, so going into seventh grade with them, meant a lot to you. But what was more important to you was Anna. You were crushing on her a long time before seventh grade. Naturally, you started to get jealous when Brendan started to look at Anna during your school band practices, and when he started to pass her cute little notes. You didnt like it, you hated it. You told yourself that you had to do something, before Brendan asks Anna out. You were thinking really hard, and during final practice before the show, you got an idea. You will kiss Anna after the show.

You told Sam and Maya about it, they started to crack silly little jokes in front of Anna, but luckily she didnt really understand what they were talking about so you were safe. During Anna's opening solo, you looked a bit dreamy at her, that's what Sam and Maya will probably make fun of later but you didnt really care about it. After the show, you hurriedly jumped off the stage and went straight to Anna, she was talking with her dad, but when he saw you he immediately went somewhere else telling Anna that "he has to talk to someone". When he left, and you two were alone (well, not really because it was like half of your school in there), you looked up at Anna (she was taller than you, at least in this particular situation), and you kissed her tenderly but also really long on her lips, she started kissing you back, so right now you were sure that Brendan didnt stand a chance with you. After the kiss, she looked at you and smiled widely.

- I thought that I had to make my first move, but you finally did it. -

You smiled too, and took Anna by her hand, going straight to Maya and Sam to tell them that you're together now.

All of this happening in front of Brendan, who was now mad at himself that he didnt thought about doing something similar as you did.

Sam

You and Sam weren't really close with eachother, but that didnt stop you two from feeling something for one another.

You were almost always paired up with eachother for projects in different classes, so you were kinda forced to talk and spend time at yours or his house.

One time, while sitting in your garden and discussing something for your physics project, you two developed a strange conversation in the process.

- Do you have like, an eye on someone Y/N? - Sam asked while dribbling something in his notebook.

You were kinda taken aback by that, and you didnt really thought before saying your answer.

- Yeah, I do... - you told while looking down at a pile of dirt.

Sam got visibly surprised with your answer, but not visible to you, because you were looking down.

- Well, who is it? Is it someone that I know? - he got interested in your answer, and he was mentally chanting to himself, that you will call out his name.

When you were just about to lie to him, that he didnt know this person, you suddenly heard a car honking in front of your house, it was Sam's mom. You two said goodbye to eachother, but you saw Sam's cute smile while he was waving to you, driving away with his mom. After you closed the door, you sprinted to your room, and thought about something slightly absurd. Does Sam like you too? You were left alone with this thought for the night. The next day, you wanted to look extra pretty for Sam, you knew that it was dumb, because he probably wasnt talking about you, but you had nothing to lose. So you put on some light makeup, with the help of your mom, because she was better at putting it than you. After your mom drove you to school, you went to your first lesson, and you sat at your assigned seat, next to Sam.

- Hi, Sam - you said while looking at him, smiling lightly.

- Whoa, Hi Y/N, you look pretty today, I mean you always look pretty but today you look like... extra pretty - he got visibly embarassed, and Maya who was sitting before you and was laughing at Sam's attempt to compliment you, didnt help him out. You just smiled at him and directed your attention at your teacher, who was just about to start the lesson.

After some classes, you had some time for lunch, so you entered the cafeteria as always, and you saw Sam waving at you to come sit by him. It was weird for you that he was sitting afar from his friends.

You sat next to him.

- Why are you sitting alone? - you asked him, visibly confused.

- Oh, I just wanted to talk with you... - he looked at you, and got closer to you.

You were looking at eachother for what felt like eternity, but finally Sam kissed you by surprise. He kissed you really long, and kinda messily, probably because he didnt thought about it before actually doing it. After he backed away from you, he just looked at you, scared that you will run away from him.

- You know, yesterday I was talking about you, Sam... - you looked at him and smiled.

He smiled too, and took your hand in his.

- So are we like, boyfriend and girlfriend now?

- I guess so... - you both smiled and went to sit with Sam's friends who were howling at you both mockingly.

Brandt

You and Brandt were like totally opposite, he was one of the most popular guys in school, and you were just a normal student, almost invisible to others, but not to him. He secretly liked you, and behind every rude comment about you, in the back of his mind he thought about your pretty features, how you're so nice to everyone that are nice to you, and how you always replied to his rude comments with such creativity. So, when it came to the big dance, he decided that he will kiss you that night, and then he will see if you like him back, if not, then he can find another girl in a blink of an eye (at least, that's how he thought so). You were a loner, you didnt really had any close friends in school, of course you talked with some of them like for example; Sam, Gabe and even Dustin if he wasnt an ass to you, but you didnt had any close relationships with anyone, you were once again just there, just someone, not really outstanding.

You still wanted to look pretty, you picked your best outfit, you asked your mom to do your hair and help you with your makeup, maybe someone would dance with you? Of course you didnt want to exaggerate your look, so you kept it simple, just added some things that you normally wouldnt (like light lipstick, or colorful eyeshadow).

Your mom drove you to school, and told you to have fun. Brandt was standing in front of school with his friends, and Heather's "gang", you quickly walked past them, not paying attention to things they were saying (just Heather and her band gossiping about your outfit, but who are they to judge?). When you finally walked inside the school, and the hall that the dance was taking place, you were kinda impressed by how the place looks, and how everyone is dressed up (for example Brendan's new look), but you decided to just have fun and not really look at anyone else. You were chatting with anyone that wanted to talk to you, you had a great conversation with Sam, Gabe and Jafeer. After talking with them, you kinda stood under the wall next to the table with drinks and snacks, then you saw Brandt going up to you with his friends, but they stood a little far away from you. You looked at Brandt, who had his infamous smirk on his face.

- Nice look, wanna dance? - he asked with his bored tone in his voice, you were surprised that he didnt insult you in anyway. That made you think he was making fun of you, but his face right now was deadly serious.

- Is this some kind of trap? We'll go dance and one of your friends will pour something on me? - you asked cracking up a smile, but you were kinda nervous that you guessed it right, and he would make a fool of you as soon as you'll go dance with him.

- Promise it's not... - he said smiling a bit, it wasnt his smirk, it was a normal, sweet smile, you never saw him smiling like that and you thought that he was being serious. So you went to dance with him, as soon as you both stood on the dancefloor, the jumpy and fun music faded, and now the more slow and romantic one played in the background. Brandt took your hands and put them on the back of his neck, his arms went to your back, his grip was strong but also careful to not hurt you. You both started sway to the music, you desperately tried to avoid Brandt's gaze, but it was nearly impossible cause he was kinda burning a hole in you with his eyes.

- You know, I really like you Y/N... - He said while looking into your eyes, you were kinda confused by his words, but then he went straight for your lips with his, and started to kiss you really strongly and passionately. You didnt know what to do, you wanted to kiss him back but he was way more invented in it than you, so you just kinda stood there in shock, he finally backed away from your face, but still held you.

- You want to be my girlfriend? - he asked and looked at you, you didnt feel it but he was nervous that you will tell him "no". But luckily to him you didnt.

- Sure - you nodded lightly, and smiled.

You wouldnt thought this morning that you will suddenly be with Brandt, but now you were, and you liked it.

Alex

You and Heather were once inseparable, that was until she started dating Alex. Their relationship was rather awkward, because Heather was really jealous and posessive of Alex, their relationship was on and off. You stopped talking with Heather, because she also started accusing you of trying to steal her boyfriend (which was really dumb, because you rarely spoke with him). But anyway, after cutting off contacts with Heather, you started to notice something weird. Alex was always by your side, I mean like literally. He was always sitting close to you (not like directly next to you, but close enough for you to notice it). He was always looking at your direction (not saying he was looking directly at you, because you never caught him doing that, but it was still weird). Sometimes you thought that he was telling Brandt or Dustin about you, because they were whispering to eachother while you were walking past them, or when you were looking at them occasionally in class.

You always got that weird gut feeling while looking or thinking about Alex, that's when you realized you started to develop feelings for him. It was really infuriating for you, you felt uncomfortable in your own body while getting that feeling. You finally decided to talk to Alex of your assumptions (not that you love him, but you wanted to confront him about his sneaky glances at you and gosipping about you with his dumb friends). So you did, you lured him to janitors closet, and you stood before the door, so he wouldnt try to escape. You looked at him, and saw that he was kinda scared, I guess you couldnt really blame him, you would be scared too if someone locked you up with them in janitors closet.

- Alex, why are you like staring at me all the time? - you looked at him seriously, he looked at you with his big eyes.

- I dont know what are you talking about? - he started to get visibly nervous, something that you never thought you will see, because he was always calm and he sometimes looked really bored.

- I dont know if you are lying to me right now, or if im going crazy, because I always see you next to me, I always see you looking in my direction and I see you whispering to Brandt or Dustin while you're looking at me! - After you said this, a long silence came afterwards, you were looking directly into Alex's eyes, and almost as you were hypnotized you started to kiss him, which he almost immediately returned back, you were both kissing eachother messily, as if someone would pull one of you away from eachother. And that's how it all started with Alex And you, Heather wasnt pleased by that, but, who cares?

_________________________________________

I hope that you liked it! I tried to write gender neutral reader (which was easy to do with Maya and Anna), but with the guys i kinda forgot about it, but you can still imagine reader as a male or a female.

#pen15 x reader #pen15 #mayaishiipeters #annakone #samzablowski #brandtpen15 #alexpen15 #gender neutral reader #female reader #male reader

106 notes · View notes

the-hydroxian-artblog · 6 months

Note

I love your animatronic toy OC guys so much, they have so much personality to them and their colours are really good (especially umbra)

Thank you! The funny thing about Umbra's design was that while I was developing it about two years ago and had some colors in mind, I described in text what I already came up with to an image generator for fun (shitty unconvincing old kind, vs now where it looks like shit but in a somewhat more convincing way) and it produced something so silly that I made her design better than what I would've settled with out of spite.

More details of my process and anti-AI ranting below the cut, so the examples given won't show up on search results. Google Images is getting polluted too much with slop to begin with.

Let's begin.

In 2022 I was drafting up Umbra's design with mostly concrete details. At this time image generators were newer and much less convincing, and I was a bit less aware of just how unethical they were, so I fed one a text description of what I had drafted for her design out of curiosity. Something along the lines of, "doll of an anthropomorphic owl librarian in glasses, blazer/suit jacket, skirt, corset, high heels, sitting on a bookshelf" and probably a few more terms. Really specific, lengthy prompt.

I try to be open-minded and give new things a shot, but the results were Not Great. Ideally, I'd want to not share the AI pictures at all on-principle, but I feel like it's useful, transparent, and necessary to show them. Both as a means of not hiding anything, but also just to appreciate where the design is at in spite of it.

Outside of this particular collage of Weird Owls, no other pictures on this blog are AI-generated. AI Image Generation is harmful, and I am against its usage.

But hey, two of the generated pictures look close, right? The top left is the closest, and bottom right is second.

That's because they started out worse, and I had to actually erase chunks of them and have the generator fill in the blanks to get anything remotely close to what I wanted. Misshapen limbs, unrecognizable anatomy, fever-dream clothing details, etc. They didn't even have a corset or proper legs until I slapped the generator in the face enough times to make it produce them. I was just using it to photobash, which was such an annoying process, I just went "this is dumb" and stopped. They're literally posed like that because I kept erasing and regnerating their limbs until they looked vaguely in-character. It literally only looks passable thanks to STRANGLING it with human input.

Before I used the image generator, I already drafted her to be night-themed with yellow eyes and something like purple, dark blue, or sky-blue as her main color; the generator making one owl yellow-eyed and purple was a happy coincidence, and the only thing the generative AI "came up with" that I didn't already have in mind or included in the prompt was the light blue shirt, which I did adapt into her cyan shirt and stockings/socks as well. That was a good call. You get One Point, Mr. AI.

...Which still meant that at its absolute best, it was a largely redundant step in the creative process if its contribution was worse than what a randomized palette generator or character creator could come up with.

That's already putting the ethics of it aside, like carbon emissions, data pollution, using artists' and photographers' work without credit or permission, the incentive to plagiarize, flooding sites like deviantart with slop, Willy Wonka Shit, etc etc etc. When people say "you can use AI as a tool though", this ordeal was enough to convince me that it's more trouble than its worth, even in its most ethical usage. I feel gross for having even tried. I wish I knew what sources went into the creation of those Weird Owls. It'd be better for research if the right people could be credited.

Nothing else on this blog is AI-generated or ever will be. The art below is purely my own (2022 vs a few weeks ago)):

Actually drawing Umbra and solidifying her design was far more rewarding than having an image generator vaguely approximate my own ideas. I wanted her to look really special, so I used a black cape and pants, gold highlights and buttons, and blue undertones to make something more distinct. Also, neck floof. Very important. I wanted the head in particular to look distinct and original, going with bold black streaks to really help her look distinguished.

I also have certain inevitable Hydroisms for Fancy characters like her; most apparent in these designs for Chasey and Kaita from even longer ago, which were more of an influence than anything else. (Old art of mine from like 2021, Kaita ref looks wonky but Chasey still holds up nicely):

Most of Umbra's other design elements were already commonly used with established ocs like Kaita, like her shape language, corset, skirt, heels, etc. It was my previous work with Chasey that inspired the use of gold buttons and highlights.

Umbra is also now a bluer shade of purple partly to distance the current design from that ordeal. All things considered, I'll probably make her more indigo next time. I already wanted her to have a wide color range from the get-go (Featured below is, again, purely my art from 2022:)

I may use a different colored shirt and stockings in the future. I like to think she has many different shirts and clothes based on the different stages of the night sky, from dusk to dawn, and the painting I made in the top right there was an exploration of her range in different lighting.

All in all, it's frustrating. I'm proud of her design, but explaining all of this is annoying, because it's technically all relevant to showing how her colors were picked and how the design was made. I still technically have AI to """Thank""", in the way you thank a bad experience for encouraging you to make things better out of spite.

#Umbra Beatrix

111 notes · View notes

hannahbarberra162 · 27 days

Text

hOrnithology for Beginners, Part 6

on Ao3

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5

Note: there's a loose end I forgot to write into this chapter so I'm gonna do an epilogue.

I mentioned this elsewhere, but my work picks up a lot in the fall / winter. I'm still writing, I just have less free time. I liked writing this story a lot, I thought it was fun. Just a lil silly for some laffs.

Marco POV

“Marco, what the fuck.” Thatch was genuinely upset, which was a rare occurrence. Marco grimaced.

“I know, I know.” He put his thumbs on his temples, rubbing his forehead with his index fingers. He knew he was playing a dangerous game by not telling you that he was the Phoenix, but he didn’t think it would end like this.

“No, Marco, really. What the actual fuck?” Thatch was gesticulating wildly with everything he said and getting louder with every word. Marco needed to diffuse this situation before they got kicked out of the restaurant and caused even more trouble for Etta. She’d excused herself quickly after the scene unfolded, picking up your section to work them both. She was trying to hold herself together, but he’d seen some tears on her face. You’d all fucked up, but he’d fucked up the most and had to fix it somehow.

“Let’s go yoi, I caused enough trouble here.” Marco threw money enough to cover the bill down on the table and stood up, walking quickly out the restaurant. Thatch rose immediately, following Marco closely, continuing to berate him.

“That’s just evil, Marco, how could you? You knew that poor girl didn’t know who you were and you lied to her? Both ways? And you were going to her house tonight? That’s messed up, man. That’s low.” Normally Marco would have stopped Thatch’s rant, but he knew he deserved it. He didn’t know how to make amends, but he’d find you and try to get you to understand that he didn’t do it to be mean or spiteful. Things had spiraled and he hadn’t taken control of the situation to suit his own interests. He didn’t think you’d believe him, but he wanted to try. He had a good guess of where you’d go - he took off towards your waterfall.

Your POV

You quickly made your way to your house, grabbing only the essentials you’d need for a few nights out. You’d rather suffer in nature than sit in your house and brood. You couldn’t go back to that job and face the scene of your complete humiliation. Not only that, you really didn’t want to see Etta. Her betrayal had hurt worse than anything else. You expected pirates to be terrible, that wasn’t anything new. But to have your best friend double cross you made you feel like a bullied child again.

You grabbed your supplies, some food, a change of clothes, strapped your blow dart gun to your thigh and hit the road. You knew no one was coming to find you, but you wanted to be gone in case someone saw you on your way. You didn’t want them to get their last laugh while you were still upset. A few days by yourself and you’d be back to the way you’d always been - alone and aloof, but this time bitchier than ever. You walked past a building with wanted posters plastered along the side wall. You’d never really looked before, you didn’t care about any specific pirates. But glancing along the wall of wanted criminals, you quickly saw Marco, his picture showing him half transformed with wings instead of arms. He had a really high bounty - in the billions - he seemed like a big deal. All that meant was that everyone else but you knew he was The Phoenix and no one bothered to let you in on that little secret. You ripped it off the wall in anger. Fuck him.

Making your way to the waterfall, your mind kept returning to Marco’s face as you put everything together in the restaurant. He didn’t seem to have a “gotcha” look like you’d expected. He’d looked shocked, like a deer caught in the headlights. Maybe he was a good actor, maybe he really felt that way. Ultimately it didn’t matter since he was the one who hadn’t told you he was a Zoan devil fruit user and let you think he was just some pirate and an unrelated phoenix. You set up your camp rapidly, going through the motions without thinking. You shoved your sleeping gear and food in the tent. You stepped into the pool, swimming towards the waterfall, going through the cascading water to the alcove behind the falls. It was large enough for a few people to relax, or you to wallow in your misery.

You’d chosen to go behind the waterfall for a few reasons. One, Marco wouldn’t be able to follow you, if he wanted to come rub his victory in your face. You weren’t exactly sure about Devil Fruits and water but he probably couldn’t make it through the pool and definitely couldn’t make it behind the waterfall. Two, the loud droning sound of the waterfall was relaxing and drowned out any other sound. Like the sound of crying. You hadn’t cried in years, you always felt that your life was okay compared to a lot of others in the world. You felt guilty crying over something small like your articles being rejected from ornithology journals again when there were people being enslaved the world over, birds being hunted to extinction, and children starving on every island. But in the back of the waterfall, hidden from eyes and ears, you finally allowed yourself to cry. You cried over your lost friendship, your romance gone south, and your memories of the phoenix being tarnished instead of the highlight of your life. You cried for your loneliness, your broken heart, and for finally realizing you’d never fit in anywhere. You sobbed, letting your tears fall while the waterfall concealed you and your sorrow.

You felt exhausted. The adrenaline from earlier had worn off and combined with your crying jag, you felt completely spent. You leaned back against the alcove, hugging your knees. You weren’t hungry or thirsty, you just sat there dazed for long enough that the sun started to make its descent. You thought about coming out from behind the waterfall but lacked the motivation to do so. It was so seldom that you allowed yourself to really dwell on your feelings that when you did it was all consuming. Even though the waterfall was loud, you could hear a little from behind. Loud sounds like shrill bird calls, monkeys howling, and one familiar voice.

“Where are you yoi? I know you’re around here, I see your tent. Please, I just…I want to apologize.” Marco was looking for you, which made you suspicious. You didn’t say anything, he could rot for all you cared.

“Please, I know what I did was wrong. More than wrong, it was cruel. I should have told you from the beginning. Please, let me make it right yoi.” You snorted, you couldn’t think of anything he could do to make it right. He just wanted to apologize to make himself feel better, not you. It was like when adults made kids say sorry, you knew it wasn’t really sincere.

“If you’re behind the waterfall, that’s really clever. I can’t get to you. But…I can outlast you yoi.” You looked towards the sounds as if you could see him. Outlast you? What was he planning to do? Lay siege? Confident in your ability to get him to fuck off, you stayed where you were. He’d get bored of picking on you and leave.

“I have to say, you have nice camping gear yoi. I could use a little rest. And I see you brought more pineapple for me. I’m going to enjoy it since you’re still hiding.” Hiding?! Marco was trying to use your anger against you and irritate you enough to come out so he could talk to you. Well, it wouldn’t work. You had good reason not to talk to him, even if your stomach was growling and you wanted your pineapple. “And you left your sketchbook here, I can finally see your drawings yoi!” You felt your blood boiling in your veins. He had the audacity to use your things and eat your food and look at your private drawings? After he set you up to look like an idiot? Well, you weren’t the only one who’d look like a fool.

“FINE!” you yelled angrily. You went back under the waterfall, heading towards Marco. He hadn’t been lying - he really was eating your pineapple and sitting on your camping chair, looking at your sketchbook. Such a dickhead, you thought to yourself. Coming all the way out of the pool, you stomped up to Marco, grabbing the sketchbook from his hands. You gave him a dirty look and crossed your arms over your chest, protecting your favorite possession. You walked back over a few feet away from Marco, putting space between you. You had nothing to say to Marco, so you just glared at him.

“I deserve everything you’re thinking and more yoi. You can let me have it,” Marco said remorsefully, hand on his heart. So you obliged him and did just that. You shot him with your blow gun.

Marco POV

Marco was a seasoned pirate. He had fought thousands of opponents and was the first Commander for an Emperor of the seas. Marco was known for his lethal fighting style and ability to recover from attacks, which was reflected in his billion Beri bounty. And yet, you had managed to hit him with your blow gun. To your credit, for a civilian you were incredibly fast. And he hadn’t been expecting you to attack him and was caught off guard. The dart itself didn’t hurt him much, but it didn’t feel great either. Marco yanked the dart out of his left thigh, looking it over. Something appeared to be dripping off the tip that wasn’t his blood. He started experiencing mild itchiness around the wound site but ignored it.

“Ow,” Marco muttered. “I deserved that yoi.” You were smiling like you’d won the lottery.

“You did,” you replied, pleased with yourself. “You might want to go home now,” you continued. Marco wasn't worried, he healed the puncture wound instantly.

“I’ll be OK, the dart didn’t hurt that much -” Marco paused as he caught himself scratching his thigh. It was true that he could recover from almost anything, but not quite everything . Marco hoped his intuition was wrong. “Was there anything on the dart?” he asked, dreading the answer.

“Of course there was. Darts wouldn’t be an effective poaching deterrent if they weren’t poisoned.” You smiled even wider.

“Ah. It wasn’t that Peel Rhino venom, was it?” Marco secretly sent a prayer to every god he had ever heard of, trying to keep his fingernails from digging into his skin. You huffed.

“Even I’m not that cruel ,” you said, throwing his earlier words back in his face. You gave Marco an indecipherable look. “You’re going to have a rough time, but no, it wasn’t an aphrodisiac. If you fuck with me again, next time it will be. You’re going to have round bulls eye rashes that are hot to the touch and are incredibly itchy. Lasts about 8 hours. Hope you have zinc oxide and ferric oxide.” Marco was thankful you’d shared that information with him, he was already feeling more spots starting to bother him. He wondered if shifting would help but he doubted it. Like Ace had discovered, some toxins couldn’t be helped by Devil Fruits. He’d probably be able to clear it faster than 8 hours, but it depended on the specific toxin. Marco sighed heavily. This conversation would be uncomfortable physically and emotionally.

Your POV

“I’m sorry. I didn’t want things to be like this, I should have told you from the beginning. I wish I could go back and change things.” Marco was contrite, having dropped his act to irritate you. At least he had the decency to look remorseful for you, that was a nice touch. But he might just be more open to being nice now that you’d shot him. His hand kept drifting down towards his muscled thigh as the itching got worse. You’d accidentally pricked your finger once with the toxin and it had felt like ants were under your skin.

"Yeah, I don’t forgive you. Leave me alone” you interrupted. You didn’t give a shit what he felt, you wanted him gone and you thought the toxin would do the trick. Marco was powering through much longer that you expected him to. You were a little glad he’d stayed, getting your anger out felt good. He stood in front of you and you could almost watch the rash developing in front of your eyes.

“I know I don’t deserve forgiveness -”

“You don’t.”

“And I’m not asking for it. Can I please just apologize to you yoi?” You wavered a little in your mind, even if nothing in your expression or body language changed. Some small part of you wanted to hear him admit what he’d done and hear how it had hurt you. Not that it would make you forgive him, but it was rewarding to finally have someone admit wrong-doing after a lifetime of weak non-apologies.

“Say what you want, I can’t stop you.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you I was the Phoenix. At the very beginning, I thought you knew yoi. When I realized you didn’t, I should have told you right away.” Marco scratched his thigh through his pants.

“Why didn’t you?” Thinking back to those times when you were with the Phoenix made you cringe. You’d swam naked in front of him, for quite a while. You had been feeling a little bad about the toxin but remembering that tidbit made you happy he was itchy again.

“I don’t know how to explain it exactly, the Phoenix is a part of me but it is also its own separate entity. It really likes you yoi. It liked the way you acted towards it, and I did too. I…it made me feel good,” Marco finished lamely. “But that doesn’t mean it was right yoi. I’m sorry. I regret making you feel -”

“Ashamed? Humiliated? Mortified?” you helpfully supplied for him.

“Yes. All of those yoi. I know you don’t want to see me anymore but I thought I could do one thing for you.” You narrowed your eyes as Marco scratched harder. What could he possibly offer you?

“You shouldn’t scratch it, that makes it worse. And I don’t want anything from you.” You did actually. You wanted him to hold you in his talons and fly in the sky. But he didn’t need to know that.

“You might yoi. I know you want to know more about the Phoenix. I’ll answer any questions you have and allow you to sketch whatever you want. You can publish the information as long as it doesn’t compromise my or my crew's safety.” You made no movements but inside you were freaking out. If you were able to find out information from Marco, maybe one of your articles would finally get published and you’d be able to join the Ornithological Society of the Grand Line. Joining the OSGL had been your dream for as long as you could remember. Marco transformed one of his legs into talons to scratch at the other as he waited for your answer. His control over his Zoan form was incredible, maybe you could…no. You didn’t want him to think you’d forgiven him. Before you could speak, Marco had sliced through his pants with his talons in an effort to scratch his leg.

“I’m afraid I have to leave yoi. I’m going to try finding ointment that can help. Think about it, I don’t need an answer now. I’ll come back here tomorrow at noon. If you’re interested, we can talk yoi. If not, you never have to see me again. Take care.” With that, Marco transformed his arms into wings and flew off into the evening air. He was still scratching at his left thigh in phoenix form. Served him right.

Even though you were furious with him, you still couldn’t look away from the sight of the heavenly bird.

You had the whole night ahead to decide what to do. After Marco left, you took out the Phoenix feather he’d given you. It had some kind of bio-luminescent properties and glowed in the moonlight. You ran it along the skin of your arm, enjoying the soft sensation. It didn’t feel like a normal feather, it felt like having your fingers near a tea candle. You could almost feel the warmth of the candle, but not quite, it was just out of your grasp. It made you shiver no matter how many times you’d run it over your skin. You couldn’t bring yourself to get rid of it, no matter how badly Marco had hurt you. It was too beautiful, too precious and you didn’t want to squander such an invaluable item.

Deep in thought, you pondered Marco’s offer. Your articles had been rejected many times from the OSGL, no matter how interesting you thought the subject matter was. If you wrote about the Phoenix, your article would be accepted for sure, given how little information was known about mythical birds in general. And you’d be able to get reliable information out of Marco rather than relying just on your observations or theories.

On the other hand, if you accepted Marco’s offer, you’d tacitly be accepting his apology. Your ego still stung from the wounds he had inflicted. But…you doubted you’d ever get another chance like this. Marco had practically handed you a once in a lifetime opportunity, one that could catapult you into ornithological fame. It was a twist of fate that the same person who would be helping you achieve your dreams was the one who had crushed your desires. You stayed up late into the night, watching the stars, thinking of how to solve your dilemma.

At noon the next day, you were waiting in the spot Marco had indicated, holding a notebook and pen at the ready. You weren’t sure this was the right call, but your curiosity would only be satisfied one way. Marco arrived promptly, again half transformed. He had no visible rashes, but looked tired.

“You’ll answer all my questions?” you asked coolly. You didn’t want him to think he was off the hook just yet but you were bursting with questions for him. Once you had decided you were going to take Marco up on his offer, you wanted to go all in.

“To the best of my ability yoi.” Marco yawned. You gave him your meanest smile.

“Rough night?”

“Unbelievable yoi. I haven’t been that itchy and uncomfortable since…I can’t remember. Do you distill that toxin yourself? You could have a career in poisoning yoi.” Your smile turned a touch more genuine. You did make it yourself and it was a taxing process.

“I don’t have sympathy for you -”

“and neither did anyone else. My brothers were rooting for you to shoot me again today yoi.”

Arching an eyebrow, you continued “well, hopefully it doesn’t come to that. I do have a lot of questions for you. So tired or not, I hope you keep your end of the deal.” Marco smiled calmly.

“Have at it yoi.”

“What do the other colors you get from the phoenix’s cones and rods look like? And can you see them in human form? Or just bird form?” Marco appeared surprised.

“I’m not sure I follow yoi.” You rolled your eyes. He didn’t even know about his own biology?

“Birds have five types of cones, which support tetra-chromatic color vision and a double cone which is thought to mediate achromatic motion perception. Humans only have three types of cones in their eyes. Ergo, you can see different color spectrums when you’re in bird form. What does that look like? Can you describe it?” Marco’s eyes widened slightly.

“You know, I never looked up why my vision is so much more vibrant as the Phoenix yoi. That makes a lot of sense. I’m not sure I can describe it exactly, it’s like more shades and depth to the colors we already see.” You jotted down a few notes.

“I hope the rest of your answers are better than that, otherwise this isn’t going to be worth it. OK, next question. When you’re half transformed, are the transformed bones hollow? Can you feel the difference in weight when you’re flying between your hollow bones and your regular bones?”

Marco’s POV

Marco rubbed the back of his neck as you continued your interview. At times it felt more like an interrogation, but his Phoenix half was absolutely loving the experience. You stayed seated on your rock, writing Marco’s answers down at a furious pace. The Phoenix took all your interest as praise and was utterly charmed by you. If Marco didn’t control himself, the Phoenix would have broken out into birdsong for you. Your questions were precise and interesting, prompting him to think about things he hadn’t before. Marco found himself enjoying the discussion. He was used to answering the same questions over and over. Questions like, did he enjoy flying (yes, of course), how did he transform only some parts of his body (practice), can he understand normal birds (yes, if his head was transformed), did he lay eggs (no), things like that. No one had ever asked him if he molted (yes) and if so, if it was complete or partial (partial). He’d never given thought to the unnamed yearning he sometimes felt when he was on land for long stretches before you asked him if he ever felt compelled to migrate. Both he and the Phoenix were engaged and throwing themselves into the conversation, answering your questions fully. Of course Marco didn’t answer anything that could be used against him in combat, but your questions were so esoteric he couldn’t imagine the uses beyond pure scientific research.

You also had Marco pose periodically in various stages of transformation for you to draw. You took your time sketching the exact anatomy of numerous body parts. The Phoenix was in heaven, your undivided attention to every detail of its body giving Marco the chills. Marco watched you sketch, completely absorbed in your work. Your sketches were perfect, capturing the essence of the Phoenix with just a few strokes of your pencils. He wished he could keep some but he knew better than to ask for one. After a few sketches, you’d resume asking him questions. This process went on for hours, but Marco never tired of it. If anything, he enjoyed your company more and more.

“Finally, do you form monogamous pair bonds? And if so, for how long?” you asked without a hint of shyness. Marco was nonplussed at your bold question, especially given the situation between the two of you.

“I’m sorry, I don’t think I’m going to answer that one yoi. If the World Government found out that I had a pair bond for any amount of time, that person would never be safe.” Marco didn’t want to answer you, he was sidestepping the question. He knew that he and the Phoenix preferred a single monogamous partner but that was difficult when he spent so much time at sea. The Phoenix didn't care about the tension between the two of you and would have happily accepted a pair bond between you at this very moment.

“All right. Well, thank you. If you can get mail, I’ll send you a copy of my article if it gets published.” Marco was hoping you’d ask for him to take you flying. That would be a surefire way to get further back in your good graces. Instead, you offered him your hand. “I’m still a little mad but thank you.” Marco swallowed his disappointment and took your smaller hand in his own, shaking it.

“I know it will get published, yoi. If you write like you draw, you’ll be a famous scientist soon.” You gave him a small smile.

“Bye.” You started packing up your things. Marco knew this was it, his time with you was over.

“Thank you for letting me talk with you. I…wish I had done things differently yoi.”

“Me too,” you said quietly. “But it’s time for you to go. Bye Marco.” Marco took his cue, transformed and left. He turned his head and watched you marvel at the sight of him one last time.

~~~

Seven Months Later…

Marco came to the top deck of the Moby, he’d heard that Doug had brought a letter for him. The old, cantankerous news coo hated everyone, including Marco. Approaching the bad tempered bird slowly, Marco saw Doug had a large envelope in his satchel with Marco’s name on it. He could only think of one person that might like this uncooperative coo and use him as a mail courier. Marco reached for the letter, got bit by Doug, and took the letter from his satchel. Doug gave Marco the bird equivalent of the finger and flew off.

Opening the envelope, Marco slid out a heavy scientific journal with art of a Phoenix on the front cover. There was a short note taped to the journal, which Marco read with a smile. He quickly flipped through the lengthy article, scanning it with the intention to pore over it later. Still reading, he turned to go leave it in his room, nearly running into Ace.

“Watch it! What’s got you so focused?” Ace tried to read over Marco’s shoulder but Marco held the magazine high up in the air. With Marco being over a foot and a half taller than Ace, it was an effective strategy.

“None of your business -” Marco was cut off as Thatch suddenly grabbed the journal from Marco's hand. Ace was shorter than Marco but Thatch wasn’t. Marco loved his siblings but sometimes he wished he didn’t live on the world’s fastest rumor mill.

Thatch was looking at the cover with his mouth hanging open. “That’s you Marco! Who did this drawing? It's incredible! What the - is this whole article about you? It’s like 35 pages long!” Thatch was flipping through the journal. Marco knew better than to reach for it back - he didn’t want it to get damaged in a scuffle.

“Yes, it’s about me. Give it back yoi. Now. Unless you want a wound that won’t heal quickly.” Marco eyes flashed as he spoke. He hadn’t intended to sound so menacing but the Phoenix wasn’t playing around. It had been moping for months, hoping to reunite the lovely little ornithologist who doted on it. Thatch handed over the journal quickly once he saw how serious Marco was.

“Wow, didn’t know it meant that much to you. Is this from that one bird island? With that bird girl?”

“Yes, that’s her yoi. She published an article about the Phoenix. And it looks like she’s speaking at the Grand Line Ornithological Society’s annual conference.” Marco was proud of you, he hadn’t been joking when he said you’d be a famous scientist. Flipping to the information about the conference, Marco read through the details of the upcoming event. He suddenly felt a yearning to fly.

Your POV

You hadn’t expected your article to be so well received that you’d be published and offered to speak at a conference in under a year. You’d sent a copy to Marco via Doug, like you said you would. You loved Doug and thought he was the sweetest news coo you’d ever met. No one seemed to agree with you but that was neither here nor there. Standing backstage at the conference center, you fiddled with your jacket anxiously. You weren’t comfortable with public speaking, you barely liked to talk to people in small groups. Part of you wished Marco was here to charm the scientists and answer everyone’s questions so you wouldn’t have to. But that was just a pipe dream, you knew you had to do this alone.

Writing the article and finalizing the drawings had you thinking a lot about Marco and the time you’d spent together. Even though you now knew he was the Phoenix, you still had a lot of love in your heart for the bird. And you could admit that you’d had fun with Marco when you’d been bird watching together. But none of that mattered, he was long gone and you’d never see him again. You took in a huge breath and held it in, releasing it slowly. Your neck was aching from all the accumulated stress, even though you were also a little excited. You were the next speaker to present and your notecards for your speech were damp from your sweaty palms. You could do this, you’d spent so long preparing. You were the most nervous for the question and answer portion of the presentation, since that wasn’t something you could prepare in advance.

You heard your name being called and you walked out onto the stage to the restrained applause of the crowd. All of a sudden, the crowd started clapping louder, with some members even standing to clap and cheer. You were confused - you hadn’t spoken yet. You saw flickering blue flames in your peripheral vision.

“Thought I would join you yoi.” You looked up to see Marco standing next to you, resplendent in his half transformed form.

“I..I didn’t know you were coming,” you said while avoiding the microphone den den. Marco fully transformed into his human form, bringing the attention of the crowd off of himself.

“Surprise yoi. Now, let’s hear your wonderful speech.” Marco was collected and peaceful, which helped you calm your own nerves. You began by introducing yourself and Marco, though he needed no introduction. The audience was completely silent during your talk, held in rapt attention as you spoke about Marco and his Zoan form. At the end, Marco gave a demonstration of his complete transformation to the delight of the crowd. Surprisingly, the audience members had few questions that were directly for Marco. Instead, they focused more on your research and theories about legendary birds. Thanking everyone for their time, you hurried off the stage with Marco following you. You were elated, this may have been the beginning of your professional career. You gave Marco a quick hug around his middle.

“Thank you Marco. I'm glad you came. A heads up would have been nice though.”

“I can’t announce where I’ll be yoi. I’m a wanted man,” Marco teased gently. You supposed that was true, though this conference didn't have any World Government officials. It was all scientists whose area of expertise was of no interest to the WG.

“Well, I appreciate it anyway.” You felt awkward, you didn’t know what to do now. You were thankful for his help but weren’t sure how you felt or what he wanted to do now.

Marco leaned down to you and whispered into your ear, causing you to shiver. “I have one question for you, since you asked me so many. Would you like to go flying?” You felt like you’d found the One Piece. Flying had been your dream since you were a child, that was what had sparked your interest in birds. Maybe...you could relent and give Marco a little bit more of your time. You could take things as they came and enjoy the ride. After all, you were an ornithologist. It was your scientific duty as a researcher to spend time with this interesting, infuriating, attractive, funny, smart pirate. And you took your professional responsibilities seriously. Very seriously.

#bird watching with a bird #marco the phoenix #marco op #reader x marco #marco x you #marco x reader #x reader #reader insert

29 notes · View notes