#this was all i got from it

[weirdly-specific-but-ok]

pt V good omens S1E1 summarised but i understood nothing but the queer

this is me back to summarising because if i think too hard about crowley and aziraphale watching each other i'll break down and i've only watched three episodes what does this say about me

without further ado, good omens episode one:

It opens with narration by God who is morally grey and tells us Earth is a libra. I see tarot cards. It could be a hallucination.

Cut to the garden of Eden. Crowley is a snake. I assume Adam and Eve ate the apples, but I am too busy looking at David Tennant.

They talk and say important things, but I am too busy looking at Michael Sheen. Aziraphale gives fire to the humans and adopts the gaslight gatekeep girlboss method of explaining it to Crowley and the folks at heaven.

Heaven consists of uncomfortable close-ups. I hear nothing they say any time a scene is set in heaven because I am counting skin cells on the angels. They like Sound of Music. I am growing to hate Sound of Music. Thanks, heaven.

Cut to modern day but not the present, 11 years ago. Zombies emerge from the ground, but they are not zombies, not yet. One of them looks like a dead blobfish. His face decomposes later.

Not-yet-zombies hand the Antichrist baby to Crowley, who catwalks through the graveyard with the basket swinging on his hand.

God starts talking about the ol' switcheroo, intercut with an American politician who loves the Y chromosome, as one does.

There are Satanic nuns, and they are bad at their job, but they really like toes. Not in a sexual way. We think. We hope.

There is a lot of baby switching and inaccurate wink interpretations. I understand nothing. It is fine. The plot is unimportant.

The Antichrist does not raise tropical fish. An easy mistake to make.

Crowley and Aziraphale try to balance the Satanic tendencies of their adoptive son Warlock, who is not the Antichrist. Crowley serves us more gender as she becomes the nanny. Aziraphale is the gardener. I hope it is not him. I hope it is someone else.

I hope in vain. It is him. It is always him.

They raise not-Antichrist for eleven years.

A scheduled dog delivery from hell does not arrive on time, which makes Crowley and Aziraphale realise they did not raise the Antichrist. Contrary to sensible interpretation, this is not good. They abandon their adoptive son, which is normal.

Cut to the Antichrist, whom I immediately want to adopt. There are friends, and I am told they are important, but all I know is Brian is just Brian and the others are foils for the horsemen of the apocalypse.

There is an apocalypse upcoming. I do not realise it until this point.

The Satanic dog delivery arrives as scheduled to the Antichrist, and becomes a puppy. The Antichrist, with boundless creativity, names the Satanic dog delivery Dog. I continue to love him.

Contrary to sensible interpretation, this is not good. The Antichrist naming the Satanic dog delivery Dog is such a tragic blow to the world of scientific nomenclature that the apocalypse is now set into motion.

The end.

[blairwitchapologist]

has anyone else been seeing the tweets about a lotion from sephora that attracts spiders

[tariah23]

The manga industry, especially JUMP, needs to hurry up and do away with weekly scheduling for mangaka. There needs to better regulations put into place for their health and safety because this is pitiful. Two weeks - monthly updates should’ve already been the standard for the manga industry at this point. These money grabbers will only continue to put the lives of these artists at stake for the sake of capitalism unless some serious changes are implemented.

[july-19th-club]

seriously have been thinking about this all night long. call me autistic but the fact that 90% of workplaces the point is not to get your work done and then be done doing it but to instead perform an elaborate social dance in which you find something to do even when you're done doing everything you need to do in order to show your fellow workers that you, too, are Working . because you are at Work . disgusting why cant we all agree that if there is no work immediately to be done. we just dont do anything

[webberwoof]

finch fancam❤

[astrhae]

crowley used the metal tool in season 1 to start time, and we learn that he's used it first to start space. to create the stars -- he still remembers how. he still remembers all of heaven's passwords: in the book crowley is described as an optimist because he has the "utter surety... that the universe would look after him". not god, but the universe. and of course he does: he helped create it and he's looking after it, too.

think about it: aziraphale had a sword, but crowley is about to face satan who wants to destroy the world, and crowley's only weapon is a tool of creation

[cozylittleartblog]

what if there was a plague doctor that was so so so cute (and was also secretly a bird themself)

[puphoods]

[ydteus]

The Third House | Book One

Coronabeth Tridentarius | Ianthe Tridentarius

[reineydraws]

i dont have a caption for you lol i'll let shanks's heart eyes speak for themselves 🫶

(source)

[lieu-rey]

first meeting

[chloesimaginationthings]

Deep down, FNAF movie Vanessa and Michael are siblings

[toxooz]

also been thinking abt pooki with his cunty scarf💅

if my next drawing post isnt the comic update take me out back and shoot me like a sick dog

[astearisms]

part of a sadness

[floccinaucinihilipilificationa]

[moonfableflor]

Bonus: explain who your cats are and how you got them in the tags