#through some bad times. like i was obsessed

[formulawolff]

fanboy behavior - t.w.

pairing: female driver!reader x toto wolff

word count: 1.3k

warnings: an older man having an insanely large crush on a woman thirty years his junior, ONE-SIDED PINING (LOTS OF IT OKAY), allusions to smut/sexual fantasies, toto is a mess, mentions of divorce, common fic tropes, yadayadayada

a/n: this is sort of a prequel to alkaline! this is set one year before the events of the 2024 bahrain grand prix. toto is super down bad in this already, so expect lots of pining and him being a flustered mess hehe! i figured this would provide some context/background for the first chapter of alkaline <3 (ALSO PLS LISTEN TO ALKALINE BY SLEEP TOKEN!!! IT REALLY ENCAPSULATES TOTO'S YEARNING!!)

his mind is other places.

he should be invested in the current conversation with his engineers and drivers, discussing the current status of the car and the potential modifications that needed to be made before sunday.

but he's not, his foot tapping against the concrete floor absentmindedly, body on autopilot.

it's almost as if his brain was short-circuiting, desperately trying to compute any sort of coherent thought in correlation with the task at hand. yet, if he tries, it just sputters, trailing off, veering towards something else.

well, someone else.

he's thinking about a driver, merely a few paddocks down.

a williams racing driver, actually.

the american girl. barely twenty-one, a rookie in the second williams seat, preparing to compete in her first formula one race in approximately twenty-four hours.

her eyes were like starlight, bursting with a torrent of emotions and complexity, pulling you into their depths, begging for you to get lost within them. her hair was absolutely gorgeous, complementing her features no matter its state.

and her physique?

fuck, the team principal felt like a teenage boy very time he stole a glance, his slacks feeling a little tighter than usual.

with a smile that lit up every room she was in, a radiant aura brimming with kindness and humility, as well as a fiery determination to compete, she was comparable to the sun.

the woman who was starting to become routinely embedded in his daily pondering.

ever since that fateful day in december, when his eyes first drank in that photo of her, hand interlocked with james in front of that williams car, she was the last thing on his mind before he dozed off. and well, the first thing his mind wandered to in the mornings.

she even made an appearance in his dreams, the sound of her voice almost haunting him, so tantalizingly sweet and angelic.

fuck, he was a goner.

this was the third month now where she consumed every crevice of his brain. a continuous loop of all of the sins he wanted to confess, the ways in which he wanted to touch her, and the burning desire to take her under his wing, teaching her all of the ins and outs of racing.

was he obsessed with her? surely not.

not that he memorized every single one of her f2 stats or anything. not that he spent a majority of his free time lately invested in interview clips with her, jotting down all of her favorite things. not that he doodled her during meetings or anything.

not that at least twelve times a day he fantasized about her in a mercedes suit, his fingers carefully tugging down the zipper.

this was normal behavior after a recent divorce. completely normal behavior, actually.

the team principal clears his throat, "i need to step away for a moment. i can barely think straight right now. please, continue. i will rejoin the conversation once i get my shit together."

he can't help but notice the way his drivers exchange a concerned glance, lewis coughing slightly.

"um, all right. toto, is everything okay?"

not quite.

he was going absolutely insane, his mind already reeling at the anticipation of potentially catching a glimpse of her. he wasn't even sure if he would or not, but that possibility sent a rush of adrenaline coursing through his veins.

those endless possibilities are what kept him up at night. what sent the blood rushing in the mornings, the stiffness in his boxers nearly pulling him out of his slumber. what had him pacing some days in his office, desperate beyond belief for some sort of way to break this spell.

as he strolls out of the garage, a warm breeze rolls through the track, strands of hair blowing all over. he curses slightly, running a quick hand through the tousled mess.

just to his left, a flurry of voice catches his attention, his head swiveling, searching for the source.

besides james is the object of his every desire, the apple of his eye.

as the sun dips below the horizon, he can barely make out her expression. she appears frustrated, her brows furrowed together, a deep frown etched across her lips.

"i just don't fucking understand why that dickhead felt the need to ask me if i was on my period!" she groans, shaking her head, "what the fuck was i supposed to do? let that slide?"

there's a sternness plastered across james' face, yet his voice is soft, laced with sympathy, "i know, but you have to realize that you're going to be asked questions like that because there are misogynists within the sport. no matter how much you prove to us that you deserve this seat, there are going to be pricks out there. we can do a little bit more media training, if you'd like. or, i can hire a publicist for you."

"a publicist? are you fucking kidding me?" her eyes widen, her tone growing more and more frustrated, "i'm not fifteen. i can speak for myself, james."

"it was just a suggestion," he shrugs, sticking out his hands, "look, i know you had a rough day, but let's focus on tomorrow. all right? you're tenth on the grid. that's monumental for your first race. you could win us points."

"we'll see," she scoffs, the toe of her shoe scuffing against the pavement, "i'm sorry for getting upset with you. i'm just really nervous. and well, scared."

scared of what? you have nothing to fear, sweet girl. you're one of the best drivers i have seen step foot on the grid.

toto narrows his eyes, lingering for just a moment longer.

"i just don't know if i deserve this seat," he can sense the falter in her voice, how it shakes, "i don't even know if i deserve a spot in formula one. i mean, look at me! i'm this upset over a dumb question. and i'm just scared everything is going to go to my head tomorrow and i'm going to overthink it."

james wraps his arms around the driver, pulling her in for a tight embrace as a sob wracks her body, "hey, when you're in doubt, you have alex and i. we will always be there for you. i know you're nervous, but you have to realize how special and talented you are to be in this position. you've deserved everything that has come your way, and you will continue to deserve this. i promise."

his biceps flex as he folds his arms against his chest, every fiber of his being resisting the urge to just walk over there and casually sweep her off her feet, squeezing her against his chest as he murmurs in her ear how fucking special she was.

james, she wasn't just special and talented.

she was a fucking star. a star that deserved to shine and hold every ounce of that spotlight.

just like the sun, she deserved to cast her rays of light all over the world.

the world deserved to know who she was. where she came from. how she got here. why she was a worthy competitor and excellent driver.

and by god, toto wolff was hellbent on making that happen.

one way or another.

he just had to be patient. play the long game.

every move from here was to be carefully calculated.

as toto harbored a plan. one that had been brewing the second that speculations swirled around the world of formula one that the first female american driver would be signing to a team.

he was going to have her by his side at mercedes.

fuck, he had been yearning for her this long already.

how much harm would a few more months do? a year?

he could wait a year. he was a patient man.

well, he could wait that long.

as long as that hunger gnawing away at him didn't kill him first.

[icyg4l]

PAC: Messages from Your Deceased Queer Loved One

Hello beautiful people! Happy Pride Month! This month has come to an end quickly, but we live on forever! I wanted to dedicate this reading to the people we have lost in the LGBTQ+ community to violence, suicide, illnesses and more. They deserve to live long lives without disruption. As the small pieces of progress rise, there comes more regression which is why it is important to emphasize the safety of queer people everywhere. Any queer person you have felt a personal connection to will be sought out for insight through my True Heart Tarot Deck. Rest in peace to the beautiful angels that have suffered on this Earth. Let’s hope that they have a peaceful afterlife. 

Before I make my temporary departure from this community, I feel that it is important for me to give you guys a proper goodbye. I will drop a couple more PACs before this month ends. But I want to remind you all that I have a Five Dollar Friday Sale coming on this Friday! If you are interested in my sale, please refer to my guidelines. Remember, if you have more than one question, that is an additional $5. I will get to you in a timely manner. But without further ado, please choose the iconic queer film still that you feel most connected to. 🫶🫶🫶

Top Left-to-Bottom Right: (1-4)

TW// mentions of familial abuse, violence, suicide, addiction, illness.

Pile One: Hello, Pile One. Your loved one wants you to know that you do not need to be living the fast life. I feel like I am talking to people who feel like they need to grow up fast. Something significant could have happened to you when you were sixteen or to your deceased loved one. You still have time, there is no need to rush the process. I feel like your loved one passed due to an overdose or because they succumbed to HIV/AIDS. They want you to learn from what they have been through. You do not have to fit in with what the crowd is doing. Be careful when you are out with certain people this weekend. Everyone does not have the best intentions for you. It feels like you need to clean house. Your circle does not seem mature enough to understand the transformation you are about to undergo. You are being protected, specifically by a younger person on the other side. This person passed away about 10-15 years ago. Maybe even longer. They want you to start acting like you care about your life. Let’s change our ways for the better, shall we? This may go unheard until a later time, when you really need to hear it but you will get the message. 

Cards Used: King of Swords, 8 of Wands, The Empress, The Moon, 2 of Discs.

Pile Two: This pile feels very heavy in comparison to the last pile. Pile Two, this death feels very recent, like within the last year or so. This also has some romantic undertones. This could have been your partner, or a friend that you never confessed your true feelings for. This person could have expressed suicidal ideations to you. They admire the way that you took care of them while they were depressed. You took them out of their comfort zone and introduced them to a new life. I am channeling the movie ‘Perks of Being a Wallflower’. I think this person left you with a lot of questions when you died. But they want you to know that you did all that you could. There is nothing that you could have done to turn back the hands of time. What’s done is done. They don’t want you to become obsessive over their spirit, but celebrate all that they’ve done and accomplished thus far. Don’t try to save everyone because everyone doesn’t need to be saved. You will never fully heal from this trauma but you will get closure. It feels like you need to move far away from where you are. It brings up too much drama and bad memories. You deserve to be in a place where you feel safe and grounded, even if it means making the move alone. Focus on moving forward from now. They will always have love for you, even in the afterlife. Even if you move on. In fact, when you start dating someone, they will pull the strings behind the scenes for the union to form. 

Cards Used: The Hermit, 3 of Cups, Ace of Discs, The Empress, The World, 2 of Wands. 

Pile Three: Hello, Pile Three! This is exactly who you think it is. If you have been smelling certain scents or have seen things randomly fall, then this is definitely for you. This feels like a cousin or a sibling. I feel like you found out some stuff about this person after they died and it shocked you. “Well, what now?”, they ask. Are you going to look at them differently? I feel like they had a bit of a reputation, but they’re highly misunderstood. They want you to focus on making peace with who they were. Don’t try to justify their mistakes/choices. It is what it is. Instead, focus on more important things like attaining your goals in the physical realm. Some of you may be in the gym using it as a coping mechanism. Make a goal so that you can beat your PR. Something about your childhood is significant here. Unfortunately, I feel like some of you were victimized as a child by this person and because of that, you don’t know how to view this person through an objective lens. It makes you feel guilty because you feel like you should be focused on the good stuff. You have a complicated relationship with this person, even after death. I am channeling this book called ‘All Boys Aren’t Blue’. The author opens up about an inappropriate relationship he had with his cousin and he addresses his cousin with respect, but still holds him accountable for taking advantage of him. For others of you, I feel like this person is sorry for exposing you to the wrong crowd. I heard “the secret is out”. At some point in their life, they stopped caring about themselves and in return, this affected those around them. They want you to find room in your heart to forgive them. It will be a long and complicated journey, but they have hope. 

Cards Used: 6 of Cups (RX), Temperance, The Moon (RX), 7 of Swords, The High Priestess, Justice, The Star. 

Pile Four: Pile Four, your loved one does not want you to keep up with appearances. Be as true to yourself as you should be. Not all of us have the privilege of being able to come out and be ourselves. Some of us have to blend in and be like everyone else because that’s what we have to do to keep ourselves safe. If you suspect that anyone was in the closet in your family (immediate family to be exact), then you were right. This person was family oriented, so they chose to stay silent about their identity. Plus, it’s no one’s business. But once again, this was not a choice. They feared being exposed or treated as an outsider. But they see what you are doing and they want you to keep doing it. Keep making friends with other queer folks. Go to pride events. You may find members of your chosen family there. You are a bit naive right now, so you might not understand the full complexities of what they’ve gone through. They understand that you could be upset with them but keep the family close. Do not isolate yourself; even if it means talking to two family members, please keep in contact. It feels like this person was a bit of a mystery. So, you should ask about their history. Get in contact with people who were close with them and get to the bottom of their story. They want you to make an altar for them, so you can connect with them. It will make all the difference in the world, love. 

Cards Used: 10 of Cups, Judgment, The Hierophant, The High Priestess, 10 of Discs, 7 of Wands (RX)

[sepherinaspoppies]

I'll Follow You Until You Love Me

pairing: Armand x Daniel Molloy

summary: Daniel is tired of his stalker, hiding in the shadows. So he does something to get his attention.

warnings: 18+, MDNI, male mutual masturbation?, Armand being a underwear thief, mentions of stalking, some cum play? I think that's it.

wc: 865

notes: this is my first time writing for IWTV, I apologize if it sucks. I'm still new at this. haha! btw this was inspired by Lady Gaga's Paparazzi so pls give it a listen.

Daniel found himself quite exhausted as soon as a cab dropped him off at the nearest and cheapest motel.

If there was one thing else he needed the most besides some well needed shut eye, it was a hot shower after traveling for eight hours straight from Tucson to Los Angeles.

Not only did Daniel need to shower off the smell of public transportation but to overall unwind. 

He muttered a grateful thanks to whatever God that bestowed upon him functioning hot water and a clean towel. Well at least Daniel thought it was clean. However, as tired as he was, he couldn’t care less if it wasn’t. 

After traveling through every state of the country, he found that most cheap motels didn’t offer anything but a bed. Some even didn’t include a bathroom and Daniel had no choice but to walk to the nearest convenience store simply just to pee. 

Daniel acknowledged that he could just whip out his dick near a corner and piss. Quite frankly, it wasn’t in his nature to do that. No matter how bad he had to piss, he would hold it until there was a bathroom. 

After his shower, Daniel wrapped a towel around his hips, walking to his suitcase near the entrance about to grab a pair of clean boxers when his hand met nothing but denim and linen. 

Odd. 

“What the fuck?” Daniel cursed as he spilled his clothes all over the bed. His shirts, pants, and socks were there. However there was no sign of his undergarments and Daniel was one hundred percent positive he did not leave anything behind in Tucson. 

Maybe in his panicked state, running from his obsessive stalker, he overlooked packing them. 

Daniel was careless but not that careless. 

For a moment he thought about calling the motel back in Tucson as silly it was. Though, there was a fat chance he’d likely get them back. 

Great, so commando it is. 

He unwrapped the towel around his hips, throwing it somewhere across the room, preparing to sleep fully in his birthday suit. Until he heard a low growl coming from his window. 

It didn’t take Daniel long to figure out who those animalistic growls belonged to. 

He was here. 

Right on schedule. 

No matter where Daniel went, he was always there. Lingering behind the shadows with those creepy orange eyes. 

Honestly, it was getting quite tiring that he couldn’t fully show himself. He had been following him for years and not once had he come out to say anything which made it more creepier than stalking him. 

Of course Daniel was frightened in the beginning but around the ten month mark, he realized he wasn’t a threat. 

A part of Daniel wondered why he was following him out of all the others he possibly could. What made him so fascinating? So captivating? 

After some consideration, Daniel knew of something that might make him come out of the shadows. It was crazy yet worth a try. 

Daniel laid on the bed, positioning his body in front of the window right where he knew he was lurking and observing. 

He spat on his palm before rubbing his already hard-on. A whimper came from the window and Daniel bit his lower lip to hide the slight smirk of satisfaction. 

He shuddered when he gave himself a hard squeeze from base to his glistening tip, releasing some soft moans he hoped he could hear behind the glass that separated them. 

By all means, not only could Armand definitely hear the sounds of self pleasure but also the echo of his heart pumping wildly. His beautiful boy craving some release he desperately yearned to gift him with. 

And it took everything in Armand not to break the window and claim his body, heart and individuality as his right fucking now. 

Gods, he was beautiful. 

His eyes. 

His smile. 

His aura. 

Him. 

Only him. 

Watching his beautiful boy pleasure himself made him absolutely hard. Armand’s fingers slid to unbutton his trousers, freeing his tall erection and carefully beginning to stroke himself at the same pace his beautiful boy moved in. 

Daniel’s gaze fixated to where he stood. Staring straight into those creepy eyes of his as he was nearing his end. He was close, so goddamn close he could feel the small waves of euphoria slithering in at the bottom of his spine. 

“Fuck, I’m almost there.” 

Armand groaned as he continued to stroke faster and faster until finally his beautiful boy let out a drawn out moan, coating his sheets full of his release that soon when he fell asleep, Armand would have a taste of. 

He already kept his undergarments while he slept, so there was nothing wrong with that. 

Daniel basked in his release, continuing to watch the silhouette of his body writhe in what he assumed was self pleasure. 

Though, he assumed right as he heard low feeble whimpers closer to the window. 

He had come too. 

That alone made Daniel feel more aphrodisiacal. He waited a few more moments before he loudly declared:

“Well are you just gonna stand there? Or are you going to fuck me?”

Armand had done just that. 

tagging my bestie @dreaming-for-an-escape

[penkura]

You have no idea how happy I am to finally find someone who writes for penguin 😭 he’s so fucking handsome and I love him sm!

Anyways onto my request, could you write a scenario with Law, Penguin, Zoro, and whoever else you’d like, of reader being hit on and then protecting her?

Thank you so much I am obsessed with your writing 😭💛

Yesss more love for Penguin!! He deserves it so much, omg, he's so good!

I've never been hit on before to my knowledge, so I'm just winging it here, but aahhh protective men. <3 I decided to add Shachi to this since he's started working his way into my circle of blorbos, so this my first time writing him in a romantic light lol. I hope you like it!

I'm sorry this took me SO LONG TO DO AAHH. I got back from vacation and life took over again.

Law

Law understands fully that his crew needs time off the Polar Tang every now and then, and that most of the time, that leads to everyone taking over a tavern when you dock, drinking their cares away while he watches to ensure no one does anything stupid. After the one time a fight broke out because Penguin unknowingly hit on the bar owner’s wife was enough, your captain keeps a close watch to cut off anyone who needs to stop before they do something to get you all in another fight.

Still, he has no problems letting you all have some time to relax and unwind, enjoy some drinks and the bad karaoke some of your crewmates partake in, as long as he keeps an eye on you specifically, Law is totally fine with the bar crawls that happen. He isn’t watching you because he doesn’t trust you, it’s the opposite. He trusts you more than anyone else on the crew, that’s why he watches you so closely when you’re out, to make sure you stay safe. There’s too many people out there, men and women, that are willing to lie or take advantage of you to get to him, Law understands that very well.

None of it has to do with the tiny little secret crush your captain has on you, nope. Not at all.

It has nothing everything to do with the guy flirting with you at the bar, it’s definitely not the reason his grip on his glass is so tight to the point you could hear a slight crack. Law can tell you aren’t entirely comfortable, by the nervous smile you have on your face as you inch back a little at a time, but the guy doesn’t seem to get the hint, moving closer, with a drunk grin on his face. Law doesn’t step in right away, just watching to make sure you’re safe. The second you let on that you feel unsafe, or the guy makes the wrong move, he’ll intervene. He has to keep his crewmates safe, small crush or not.

It's not even a minute later when the man puts a hand on your thigh, causing you to stiffen up, that you see the familiar blue from Law’s Room, and suddenly you’re sat in his lap as the drunkard jumps up when you disappear. Law’s arm wraps around your waist as the other guy looks around for you, too drunk to notice where you’ve been placed before he downs his own drink and asks for another, your captain almost sighing relief that he seems to be ignoring your sudden disappearance now.

“Uh, captain…?”

It takes just a moment for Law to realize you’re still in his lap, but he doesn’t bother to push you off or anything, not when he catches the eyes of another patron on you, instead pulling you a bit closer.

“Just stay here. I can keep those drunk idiots off you.”

You feel a bit weird sitting on his lap, but still nod, thankful Law watches out for you all.

You may have to talk to him later though, based on how touchy he seems to be while he keeps you with him, but that can wait. You’ll enjoy it while you can.

~~

Penguin

Penguin trusts you, sometimes he thinks more than he trusts Law and Shachi. He knows that no matter how many people try to flirt with or hit on you, you aren’t leaving his side. You two have been through far too much for you to even think about leaving Penguin at this point, and he does recognize that.

It still doesn’t help the pang he feels in his chest when someone starts to flirt with you, even thought you never reciprocate and instead bring up your boyfriend in retaliation. Most of the time that makes people back off, usually with a dejected look at the fact you’re already taken, and appear to be happily so. Rarely do people try to push and tell you to just forget about him, and when they do, it makes you angry enough to start yelling at them about how awful they are for trying to make you give up the best thing to ever happen to you, it never fails to make Penguin blush and give you all the love and affection in the world later.

Still, this time, he feels like you’ve bitten off more than you can chew. An older man flirts with you at the bar, but you of course aren’t interested, making that apparent as you sit with her chin in your hand and barely respond. He doesn’t seem to get that you have no interest in him, even when you say you’ve got a wonderful boyfriend that you’re madly in love with. When you get up to leave, the guy grabs your arm and tells you to forget Penguin, which just makes you mad and your boyfriend quickly gets up to try and stop you from doing anything to get you thrown out.

“Excuse me?! I’m not gonna just ‘forget him’! He’s the love of my life, he’s been with me for years!! You’re insane if you think I’m going to just leave him because you think I’m easy or something! And another thing, I—”

“Okay, that’s enough!” Penguin hooks his arms under yours, lifting you up as you keep yelling and start kicking your legs, he gives a nervous smile to the man and the bartender, “Sorry about her! My girlfriend gets a little angry when she’s had too much to drink! Come on, sweetheart, let’s get back to the hotel~”

Even though you agree, the whole walk there you complain to Penguin about the man that was hitting on you, how he couldn’t take no for an answer, and it makes your boyfriend sigh with a smile.

He’s always the one to pull you from starting a fight, he doesn’t have to protect you most of the time, but he’s always glad to pull you away before you hurt someone.

~~

Shachi

Shachi knows, he knows, that you and Sanji are just friends. You’ve been friends since you were children, your moms were best friends, you and the blond were just very close and spent a lot of your time playing together back then. You’ve told him, multiple times, that Sanji’s flirting with you is a joke, he’s never had romantic feelings for you and vice versa, you’ve always viewed him as a brother.

He just can’t help it and ends up giving Sanji the slightest of glares every time your dear friend flirts with you, even as you laugh and shove his arm, it doesn’t really help your boyfriend in feeling less jealous about it. Does he feel bad about it? Most of the time, yes, but he still ends up putting an arm around your shoulders and either ignoring Sanji’s comments or glaring at him to the point your best friend feels a little awkward.

Shachi is just very protective of you, even about Sanji. He trusts you, but he doesn’t want someone to steal you away and you’re the best thing to happen to him in recent years. You notice it quickly, when Sanji takes glances from you to Shachi and back, so you smile and tell him that Nami could probably use his company, which always gets your friend to throw his flirting and heart eyes to the true object of his affection, and Sanji runs off to her. You feel Shachi physically relax, still keeping his arm around your shoulders though, as you look up at him.

“Shach. He’s my best friend.”

“I know, I just…I’m sorry…”

“No need to be sorry,” you give him a quick kiss that makes Shachi bury his face in your shoulder and wrap his other arm around your waist in a hug, “Just trust me, okay? I love Sanji like a brother, but I love you.”

Shachi nods, telling you he loves you too, and feeling so grateful he has such an understanding girlfriend. He doesn’t feel like he deserves you sometimes.

He tries to not let Sanji’s joking flirting get to him after that, but it can be hard for him at times. At least you know it’s just because he loves you and doesn’t want to lose you.

~~

Zoro

Zoro has never worried about you being hit on by others. You rarely ever reciprocate, only if you really are interested, and that’s only because your swordsman has yet to make a move on you.  Literally everyone around you can see the fact you both have feelings for each other, but neither of you wants to ruin your friendship, so you’ve not even tried to say or do anything to change your status.

So when he sees other bar patrons flirting with you, Zoro doesn’t do much apart from keep an eye on you. He knows he has no real right to, but he’s always ready to jump up and help you if needed, keeping his free hand on his swords just in case someone gets a little too friendly with you. There have been a few times he’s almost jumped up and helped you, but you’ve been able to shake off the people flirting with or touching you easily, normally saying you’d get them another drink but never going back. They’re normally too drunk to notice anyway as you sneak back to your crewmates.

That normally works, but tonight, it seems the man who’s attention you’ve grabbed is a little more stubborn than others. He sits closer than anyone else has, and keeps touching you, even as you remove his hands from you or shrug him off, he still does it. The man has no sense of personal space or your rejection of his touches, it makes Zoro grip his swords a little tighter as he watches. He really wishes he could just go over, tell the guy you’re his, and get you away from him. So at first he doesn’t, Zoro knows you can handle yourself well enough to stop anyone that make you feel uncomfortable, you’re not his partner either, you can do as you please.

But the second he sees the guy’s hand move further up your thigh and you almost seem to freeze, he’s up and by you in a second, pulling you out of your seat and behind him, sending a harsh glare to the patron that dared touch you without your consent.

“She pushed your hands off multiple times, how much does it take for you to get the hint?!”

“Hey man, she—”

“Leave my girl alone or you’re dealing with me next time.”

Zoro doesn’t wait for a response and takes your hand, leading you over to where the rest of your crew is still seated, placing you beside him and not letting go of your hand, even when you try to bring it up. None of them say anything either at first, until Sanji smirks just a bit.

“So…‘your girl’, huh?”

“Another word and I’ll tell Luffy the combination to the fridge lock.”

Even as they all laugh at the horrified look on Sanji’s face, you smile and look at Zoro, mouthing a ‘thank you’ when he looks back to you, before he holds your hand a little bit tighter with a nod.

You could’ve easily thrown the pervert that was touching you to the ground, Zoro even knows that, but he wouldn’t miss the chance to prove how important you are to him and that he can protect you from anything. Not like you needed him to show you that though.

[kingscourthouse]

YOU'RE ALSO DOING AN EPIC THE MUSICAL HERMIT AU?? :O

TELL ME ALL ABOUT IT /nf ofc I'm just really curious as to how our ideas compare and contrast :D

I'll be honest it's not really set in stone. It started as a joke concept of Boat Boys since I was talking to my friend about how they're obsessed but infatuated like how Odysseus is with Penelope in the Odessey.

<Massive ramble incoming>

It's very loosely based on Epic since there's some things in epic that would be hard to work around and also I feel bad putting some people in certain roles. Since it's loosely based on it, everything I post about it won't always be following the story because I had this really stupid idea of Grian following Scar to the underworld after he died bc he's in love. /silly

Over all its a very stupid au.

Mainly its Joel fighting in the war for years so he can return to Etho. Unlike Odysseus though, Joel carries an oar given to him from Etho everywhere he goes. The end is sharpened into a spear and is enchanted with fire aspect. The bands wrapped around his arms are from Scar who believes they will bring him safety. Throughout the journey, Joel will cycle through a lot of looks as he grows in age and changes. Near the end of the war and beginning of the story, he's inspired by his Stratos outfit. As he's in the underworld his hair grows out and covers more, he looks more like (my design) of Bad Boy Joel from Limited Life. Only difference is that instead of his hair being wild, it's long braids that he's never touched. And then when he finally returns home he'll look more like his skins in the early Life Series with long hair, long beard and obviously out for blood. He's a man with a trail of bodies and isn't afraid to leave more.

Beef takes the place of Eurlylocus, as Joel's second in command and a brother in arms. Beef is the one of the people always by his side and knows what Joel is fighting for. He makes the most level headed decisions but won't hesitate when he thinks it's time to kill or leave. While Joel wants a peaceful way out, Beef will do what it takes to make sure their men survive. When perishing in the storm, Beef is found with Scar in the underworld. Speaking of llamas-

Scar takes the place of Polites. Throughout the story the amount of scars he has grows from his working on the ship. Most on his face and chest are from the war, but a good portion of the ones on his arms are from working on the galley. He uses a bow and his sharp aim had gained him a title in the war, but he's actually fairly strong, tying ropes around his arms and fallen men to drag them across the battlefield. He'll tie the rope to multiple oars on the ship so people can have breaks. A lot of his scars are barely seen as scars now and more as his stories. A walking display of honour and comradery. Some say he was blessed by one of the gods for his silliness and bravery. Sometimes being near him you can hear faint laughter. Some think it's the messenger god. Others believe it's the vex that haunt the lotus eaters. Scar is a mystery to a lot of them.

Now that we got the boring ones out of the way (/that's a joke, I love them)

THE GODS

From what ones I've posted so far there's a few that I think I've finally settled on.

Skizz takes the place of Posiden. And yeah yeah I hear you, Xb would've made a great Posiden he's literally known for guardian stuff. But while I agree, I think Skizz would make a better fit to match the energy and motives from the musical.

Instead of Skizz having a son and that's what sends him into drowning Joel's ship, Skizz made a friend. Which is odd for the gods seeing as they're above everything. Skizz found a cyclops one day on the shores with his sheep. He would spend his days around it til eventually the cyclops just told him he knew he was there. Weirdly enough, he ended up becoming really attached to this cyclops. They became close friends and something that Skizz really cared about, even if he couldn't see him that often without being caught or seen. When Skizz returns one day to see that his friend is blinded and suffering, he goes into a rage and follows Joel to make him pay.

The cyclops is Impulse. He's kind, but if you wrong him then it's over. His sheep were a gift from Skizz and to have them slaughtered is a crime that won't go unpunished.

Gem is Athena. I actually struggled with who to make Athena because so many of them would make a great Athena. Honestly all the female hermits I've struggled with. Gem is Athena, the god of wisdom and war. She helps Joel until she realises the mistake she's made and leaves him to suffer his own consequences. Gem can take the disguise of a deer and sometimes owl when she's with Pearl. Pearl also gifted her two fish, Aylin and Lucien. One of the moon and one of light. They are disguised under her cloak as a part of the patterns she wears but are used as messangers and omens for those who look. Her fish are actually how she found out that Skizz had gotten attached to Impulse. She promised she wouldn't tell and mostly teases him about it.

Pearl takes the place of Artemis. Her post actually had more information on her than the others. She displays the current moon above her head at all times. During the day she'll stay in busy areas so she won't be noticed or hide in people's shadows or reflections. When she hunts she has her pack of wolves. Mortals say that when a blood moon happens, she had killed or avenged a god. And when a blue moon happens, she is mourning the loss of someone. During new moons, her eyes glow and like how cats look in the dark. New moons are most likely times that you'll ever run into her, even if you don't notice.

GRIAN. Ough sorry but I LOVE how Hermes is depicted in Epic. There's no way I couldn't make him Grian. He has a habit of watching everything that's happening. Especially with Scar. He'd whiz through the battlefield unseen by the gods just to grant him small blessings at a time to aid his fight. When he returned eventually to the ship and found that a bunch of men had died, including Scar, he started taking longer trips to the underworld. It's not often he stops to sightsee. Always places to go, places to be, orders to be carried out and messages to be sent. But for once he doesn't take the quickest route. Will take detours. He won't get close, he never has and never will. But he'll spot Scar's spirit mindlessly singing and spreading hope throughout the underworld, and will enjoy it for only a moment before leaving. When helping Joel, he wants nothing more than to see him escape safely. Though he does mess with him a bit. Pulling a few pranks here and there until he reveals himself. After the underworld saga, Grian is seen carrying Scar's old bow that had been blessed by him and Pearl. If anyone asks he'd just say that he was taking back what was rightfully his. He has no use for it, but it is his none the less.

Circe and Aeolus are still in the works because as I said before, I keep switching the female hermits to and fro and can't decide. Though I've got an idea of who I want them to be.

Idk man this whole au was supposed to be a joke to teach my friend about the Odessey through Epic and it somehow became serious and I really like it and like designing it and oh my god I cannot wait for Thunder saga because then we get to see more of the full pantheon and I already have ideas of who's gonna be who.

But yeah. That's ehhh.... That's all I can think of off the top of my head. What's hard is not confusing this with my Hades au which is a whole 'nother can of worms I do NOT wanna touch rn XD

[felixcosm]

Thought about your Edgar post for like 5 seconds too long, and I wanted to say how much I think that it seems that Mike is really judging their characters based on personality rather than actions if that makes sense?

They've both done some truly awful and heinous things - Edgar especially - but when not caught up in time travel bullshit, Edgar is a genuinely kind and compassionate person. Something that, as his boyfriend, Mike sees a lot of. Mike on the other hand, can be a bit of a bitch sometimes. (said with all the love in my heart of course)

Obviously Mike Walters is the true champion at seeing his loved ones through rose-tinted glasses with Edgar being one of the two most blatant examples (the other being Anne imo), but I do think there's something about the Mikes saying that the truth is what they feel to be emotionally true. They have flaws that they don't like about themselves, whereas Edgar is someone they love, and someone who loves them back. They see a lot of cruelty from the both of them, but they also see a lot of kindness and love from Edgar. Therefore in the Mikes' eyes, they are a worse person than Edgar.

Not sure if I quite articulated this great, but your post got me thinking!

(also when I say Mike, I mean Mike Walters as a species)

No no you're absolutely right and I am obsessed with how Mike says things that feel true in the moment even if they are blatantly wrong or impossible to prove (him telling Matt he loved him may be a bad example since later Mikey says he was only trying to be nice but I feel like there is certainly more to that whole scene than Mikey was willing to admit to Matt or his podcast listeners at the time)

And I feel like even though Edgar has obvious personality flaws as well, like he can be petty and mean (re: Rugby) he often speaks over Mike as if Mike's feelings don't matter (making decisions for him, disregarding his opinions and emotions during missions, treating him like a warm body to be sent out into the field), or manipulating him (Dylan mentioned in the commentaries how often Edgar puts Mikey in a position where he's the "adult" and Mikey's the "petulant child" re: 118) - and it seems like the Mikes do sort of know about it. Like Michael's still holding a grudge about Rugby so he's clearly not blind to Edgar's less than savory moments.

But that won't matter to them because in the end they will look past facts.

I'm also fascinated at how much of an unreliable Narrator Mike Walters is. Even when we have an episode where he's speaking to other Mikes or to himself, we can't fully trust what he says because he will apply his emotions to a situation and make decisions based on that.

We rarely do see Edgar and the others alone in scenes where they are themselves without Mikey interjecting with his own narrative. Which makes sense, as this is WOE.BEGONE and its the story of Mike Walters, so we see the world through their eyes.

I think you can probably say Edgar is a better person than Mike though and I am completely agreeing with your points. But at the same time I do think its funny how Mikey leads us to believe that Edgar is perfect and holy while his boyfriend just can't fucking wait to get his hands dirty.

WOE.BEGONE is a show about power and how it can corrupt someone and I think Edgar is just as good of an example as Mikey. Mikey might've started as someone who was very happy to get into the time-travel murder game as he accuses himself of being in Episode 21, but Edgar goes from being scared and unsure to the actual leader controlling the fates of all of Base.

[eddiediazismyhusband]

So I’m a “new” fan. I watched S1 years ago and never got into it until the chaos of 7x04 which is when I gave it another try and watched the whole thing (met Eddie in S2 and became obsessed with buddie) by the time the mid season hiatus was over and in the course of 7B they’ve put me off the show so badly I’m not watching S8. It’s wild that they fumbled S7 so badly that it got me to watch the show and to then within a month have me never intend to watch another episode again (outside of S2/3/4 rewatch)

😬😬😬 yeah unfortunately this seems to be a pretty common thing happening….

i know i come off as very pessimistic BUT i am hoping that the new fans coming into the show who watch through for the first time and notice the palpable shift in quality are vocal enough that maybe the writers/network will see something and actually take initiative to fix it (even if it mean hiring some to keep tim in check and tell him when his ideas are bad) (AND THAT PERSON SHOULD NOT BE KR WHICH IS ANOTHER REASON THIS SEASON SUCKED WHY IS SHE STILL THERE— anyway…)

obviously i don’t mean like send hate to or harass the writers, i don’t even mean to DM them, but in general getting on social media to say “ehhh it feels like things are being rushed and/or not being planned out well enough in advance and it’s not a great end product” that might make them go “hmm” and possibly lead them towards the right direction

[operationslipperypuppet]

something about… mee maw’s burden. and it being of survival. of responsibility. of a sacrifice you made, of your own volition, and told no one about.

the first time we hear it, of course, the titular time, is when mee maw comes clean to moonshine about having crick rot. a burden she has carried for an indeterminable amount of time. one that she’s willing to shoulder, until it kills her, because she has to keep helping the cricks who are sicker. she knows it’s eating her alive, and she couldn’t tell anyone. until moonshine.

i’m skipping a lot here because of a point i’ll get to in a moment but one of the more prolific scenes it’s used under is “how long do half elves live?”. now, obviously, there’s an obsession with that moment for hardshine reasons, but moonshine’s point is about something much deeper. she took on an ability, quietly, that would extend her lifespan beyond the realm of comprehension. she’s doomed to survive that long if something doesn’t kill her first. and she’s willing to do work that takes time, things that will slowly rebuild the world, work that will make it all worth it. but she never wanted this. she was planning to learn a new type of magic to avoid it, the burden of living beyond all your friends, of knowing that there’s one day, sooner than you’d like, where everyone who ever meant anything in your early life is long gone. and she tells mee maw. who gets it, who has to get it, because she’s dealing with the same thing.

when we jump ahead to the far too many (for the part of me that doesn’t like weeping before 8am on a friday) uses for gowan kilde in campaign 3, it’s a little subtler. for the most part, it’s used as he’s talking to calder about his responsibilities as ranger general. the things he owes to the village. the things he owes to his mom. in retrospect, he’s talking himself into justifying his decision to make the deal with alexandrite. his burden lies with the protection of the village. his duty as leader (much like mee maw’s) to stand up and do what needs to be done for their at large survival. and maybe if he can explain some of it to calder, it’s off his plate.

most of the crick songs, and by this i mean the ones about crick people and not as much those from the elemental chaos, have an element of hope to them. some sort of positive you can spin from it. gunslinger’s girl is about reminiscence, the bittersweet aspect of it, and how there were good times once. greener shades has an aspect of looking to the future, one that particularly comes from its use with balnor’s letter, where things are unknown but will be better. hell, even prodigal sister, a deeply devastating death dirge, has that component where you can feel that this person is returning home to the crick. for mee maw’s burden, it tends to be an element of relief.

because a burden shared is one that’s less heavy. that’s the final element of the song, it’s not simply about the devastation of a burden of surviving, of leading, of making a choice no one else could. it’s about the relief you feel when you share it. moonshine and calder are the ones who directly stop the bad thing that their family member is going through. jolene is able to commiserate with moonshine, to reassure her, because she’s doomed to the same sort of life.

to put it through an evil twist, it’s what plays when calder asks ultrus for the deal. because he’s looking out at an impossible fight, where callie is practically alone and sol is seconds from death, a thing his friends are certain to lose. and he can’t lose them, even if they lose. so he asks ultrus for help. and ultrus provides that relief. he takes a lot, too, but the relief is there.

with mee maw’s burden, you’re going to survive. you are perhaps doomed to. that deal you made will crush you under an enormous weight. but maybe, just maybe, the person you talk to about it can supply just enough leverage that you can get free.

[takkamek]

only now finding out about my/sta graduating like.... finding out about nina was a shock to the system even tho i hadn't watched anyone from niji in months but to hear that mys' is graduating so soon after nina just feels wrong. he is to this day the one niji streamer i've watched the most (due to timezones & genuinely enjoying his streams). from what i've read, i totally get why & why now but its still so strange

[kirkwallguy]

reading da reddit discussions about anders makes me feel a little crazy because it's like oh you've never been a member of an oppressed group that got pushed around so badly that it made you violent. you can't conceptualise the bitterness and anger that brings and think only demonic possession could drive someone to extreme action. we live very different lives.

[velvetjune]

the need to talk about Alan Wake all the time has become a personal issue

[sammygender]

if zuko isn’t meant to be gay then why do they write him. like that

[mummer]

thinking about gerris and quent lately..........

[princekirijo]

Sorry for the Elden Ring spam this game has just consumed my entire being

[googlein1942]

ive been so into rdr2 lately and i keep thinking about public nations verse where people making historical games/movies/shows/etc. consult nation people on historical tidbits and accuracy and whatnot, so queue Alfred “Favorite era of the US was the wild wild west” Jones finding his way to rockstar studios to help them out with the game accuracy/go on about whacky people he met during those days while the studio is just like write that down write that down

[gibbearish]

yknow what bugs me is when ppls criticism of YA media boils down to them just not knowing how teenage crushes work