#traumatic experience really portrayed this well for me

[lesbianshadowheart]

dont get me wrong cuz I DO appreciate Larian continuing to work on the game and trying to fix issues etc but like. mr Larian PLEASE stop responding to fan feedback. Theres like 2 million people playing this game ofc some of them will say character x should be nicer or cuter or do a little dance but that doesnt mean u gotta do it. you dont gotta call neil newbon or whoever up like come to the studio we need to rerecord everything bc a person on reddit said theyd like it better. You’ve worked on these characters for over 4 years and you are allowed to stand by your creation. None of what I said applies to Wyll’s underdevelopment btw but you all know that

[philsmeatylegss]

"eugenia cooney isn't the reason for my anorexia" like you aren't blaming her. honestly how dare you expect someone so sick, so thin they're practically disabled, and tell them they need to get off the internet because of how they look. not everyone who has had an eating disorder's experience is universal, and by treating it that way you shit on every eating disorder sufferer's autonomy. you can get off the internet if you feel that strongly about it. after all, you're an adult and it's your responsibility to keep yourself healthy right? lmao

Anyway Eugenia Cooney should get the fuck off the internet. She is abusing her severe mental illness for views, not considering who those views are from, purposefully and that is sickening <3

[vadlings]

Represention of Autistic Frustration in Laios Dungeon Meshi

Like many other autistic people, I related strongly to Laios Touden while reading Dungeon Meshi. This post isn't going to spend time disputing whether he displays autistic traits or not—while I could do that, I want to focus on why specifically his portrayal struck a chord with me in a way the writing of most other autistic-coded characters has not.

Disclaimer: as the above suggests, this post is strongly informed by my own experiences as an autistic person, as well as the experiences of my neurodivergent friends with whom I have spoken about this subject. I want to clarify that in no way am I asserting my personal experience to be some Universal Autistic Experience. This post is about why Laios' character feels distinct and significant to me in regard to autistic representation, and while I'm at it, I do feel that I have interesting things to say about autistic representation in media generally. This also got a bit long, so I'm sticking it under a read more. Spoilers for up to the end of chapter 88 below.

The thing that stands out most to me in regard to Laios' characterisation is the open anger he displays when someone points out his inability to read other people. This comes up prominently in his interactions with "Shuro" (Toshiro Nakamoto):

The frustration pictured above (Laios continuing to physically tussle with Toshiro, using crude language toward him) becomes even more notable when you remember that this is Laios, who, outside of these interactions, is not easily fazed and often exists as a lighthearted contrast to the rest of the cast. Then we get to Laios' nightmare.

In Falin's words: "Nightmares love emotional wounds. Wounds you hold in your heart. Things that give you stress, or things that were traumatic for you. They aggravate memories like that and cause the dreamer to have terrible dreams." (chapter 42, page 10.) (damn. i'm properly citing for this post and everything.)

Thus, Laios' nightmare establishes an important fact: even if he is unable to recognise social blunders while he's making them, he's at least subconsciously aware that other people operate on a different wavelength to him, and that he's an outsider in many of his social circles (both past and present). His dream-father's disparaging words stress the impact this has had upon his ability to live up to the expectations set out for him, and we also get a panel of kids who smirk at him (presumably former bullies to some degree). Toshiro's appearance only hammers home how much Laios is still both humiliated and angered by his misunderstanding of their relationship.

I've thought a lot about anger as concomitant to the autistic experience. When autistic representation portrays ostracization, it's generally from an angle of the autistic character being upset at how conforming to neurotypical norms doesn't come easily to them; as a result, they express a desire to 'get better' at meeting neurotypical standards, a desire to become more 'normal' (whether the writing implies this is a good thing or not). In contrast, not once does Laios go, "I need to perform better in my social interactions, and try to care less about monsters, because that's what other people find weird." His frustration is directed outward rather than inward, and as a result, it's the people around him who are framed as nonsensical.

The Winged Lion starts delineating Laios' anger, and Laios' reaction is to think to himself, "It can sense all my thoughts, huh?" (chapter 88, page 16.) This is the scene that really resonated with me. I'm not saying I have never felt the desire to conform to neurotypical norms that is borne from insecurity, but primarily, I know that I don't want to work toward becoming 'normal'—I don't want to change myself for people who follow rules I find nonsensical. It's the difference between, "Oh god, why can't I get it," and, "WHY CAN'T YOU GET IT?" (phrasing here courtesy of my friend Miles @dogwoodbite). And for me personally, Dungeon Meshi is the first time I've seen this frustration and the resultant voluntary isolation from other people portrayed in media so candidly. Laios' anger is not downplayed or written to be easily palatable, either.

The culmination of Laios' frustrations in this scene wherein we learn that Laios has fantasised about "a pack of monsters attacking a village" drives home just how alienated he really feels. I need not go into his wish to become a monster himself, redolent of how many autistic people identify/have identified with non-humans to some degree as a result of a percieved disconnect from society (when I was younger, I wanted to be a robot. I still kind of do.)

Obviously, wishing death upon other people is a weighty thing, but the unfiltered nature of this page is what deeply resonated with me. The Winged Lion is laying Laios' deepest and most transgressive desires bare, and they are desires that are a product of lifelong ostracization by others (whether intentional or unintentional). This is the brand of anger I'm familiar with, and that my neurodivergent friends express being familiar with, but that I haven't seen portrayed in writing so explicitly before—in fact, it surprised me because most well-meaning autistic representation I've experienced veers toward infantilisation in trying make the autistic character's struggles easy for neurotypicals to sympathise with.

Let's also not neglect the symbolism inherent to Laios' daydream. "A pack of monsters attacking a village". Functionally, monsters are Laios' special interest—he percieves everything first and foremost through his passion for monsters. His daydream of monsters attacking—killing—humans, is fundamentally a daydream of the world he understands (monsters) overthrowing the world that is so illogical to him, that has repeatedly shunned him (other people). I joked to my friends that it's an autistic power fantasy, and it actually sort of is. And in it, his identity is aligned with that of the monsters, while his anger manifests in a palpable dissociation from the rest of humanity. This is one manga page. It's brief. It's also very, very raw to me. I think about it often.

To conclude, I love Laios Dungeon Meshi. This portrayal of open frustration in an autistic character meant a lot to me, and I hope I've sufficiently outlined why. Also, feel free to recommend media with autistic representation in the notes if you've read this far—I would really like to see if there is more of this nature. Thank you for reading. I'm very tired and should probably sleep now.

[olderthannetfic]

A common anti talking point is that "problematic" content is fine as long as it's portrayed in a bad light, and I know this is mostly a way for them to say "porn bad", but, like... if we exclude stupidity, is this even a common issue at all?

I try to think of what they could otherwise mean, because I read a lot of things they'd hate, but even the cutesy stuff has dark undertones, or is clearly done with the reader meant to understand that at least one character involved is a freak. Even with porn, I'm not sure I've seen many that didn't lean into how taboo it is. The closest trend I can think of is age gap romances where the protagonist is 16 and going for someone in their 30s, but even those make sure you're extremely aware of the age difference the entire time since that's the appeal. Or an anime where the siblings are REALLY close and no one comments, but as a viewer I can still clearly pick up that these are codependent freaks.

Is this a me thing? Do I just not see these swarms of insidious positive portrayals and they're actually everywhere? I don't doubt there are bad writers that fumble their stories, and I'm less likely to read those long enough to find out, so is that what they're referring to? Or is it really always just porn is evil?

--

No, people being dumb as a box of rocks and not grasping that weird internet porn is not a how-to manual is not that common a problem.

However, being traumatized and having zero useful mental health support is.

A lot of anti talking points are coming from a place of toxic coping. mechanisms where someone thinks that if they can just control everything around them The Bad Thing can't happen again, to them or to anyone else.

Blaming the influence of bad fiction is a very common step for people who haven't had enough time or safety to accept that, no, actually, the person they trusted hurt them on purpose because they felt like it, not because Media Made Them Do It.

Or that maybe their dumb teen self handled some situations badly, but it's because teens often do that and/or because no decent adult was around to ask them why they seemed upset, not because it was fiction's job to teach them boundaries. It's a lot easier to blame the concrete experience of reading something that modeled bad behavior than the highly amorphous negative space where good offline role models who paid attention and gave a fuck should have been.

--

Some people are self-medicating with a rage high. A few are nasty ringleaders trying to power trip. Lots are just scared dumbasses who haven't grasped that it's okay to have dark fantasies.

A lot of it is just people with the hubris to say "Well, I have decent reading comprehension and can spot subtext, but what if all these other people can't?"

[probablyhuntersmom]

It's me again. The therapist/illustrator who can't stop squeaking and screaming about her beloved son Hunter.

I've been thinking nonstop about him finding the terrible grimwalker graveyard, imagining what would be going through my mind if I were him. Sifting through whatever moments, dialogue and frames that I can find from the existing material, along with references outside of the show, to formulate what an offscreen scene would've been like.. (And seeing if I can find editable and salvageable enough backgrounds so I could perhaps even depict this scene one day)

A soul like him who not only wants to help others, but also acquire knowledge:

heading back here to see the graveyard:

You can't tell me that this wouldn't still be on his mind, and he's even anxious while saying this below, scratching his face a little:

Whether he follows up on this or not, also depends on how he looks back on being shown this:

And is he just going to go cold turkey and totally drop these leads he was pursuing in the episodes before the finale? :

Three things prompted me to finally write this post:

@polyhexian's and @ashanimus's analyses of Hunter's fight scenes in Hunting Palismen and Eclipse Lake (links here and here, they're really cool to read!!), based on their years of experience with martial arts. Reading those was a revelation to me because learning about how high Hunter's skill level is, how in touch with his body he is by default, portrayed so well thanks to the crew...that allows me to make far more educated guesses about his mental health in the early stages of the pre-epilogue gap of about 4 years. Because he is so used to high activity and being on high alert, no thanks to having C-PTSD.

Observing how light and free Hunter's expressions are, and how transformed his demeanor became, in the epilogue sequence. That transformation is an indication to me of the magnitude of grief which had to be transformed within him. To be put back together, in order to be so radiant, generous and self-actualized in the epilogue...imagine how much had to be deconstructed and further broken beforehand. He wouldn't have room to fill his life up with all that amazing newness if the old isn't emptied out first.

This psychoeducational video by my fave author, also a practicing therapist, who specializes in traumatic grief: link. Hearing her address the topic of entering the second year after a bereavement vs. the first year, was interesting. Definitely confirms to me that Hunter wouldn't have carved Waffles until past the 2nd year of navigating his bereavement.

In the years that pass before the epilogue, Hunter will not be able to understand why the efforts he puts into all the rebuilding work, coordinating and leading others, and trying to have fun - only cycle back to him experiencing a mix of a restlessness and emptiness in the deepest layer of his mind. It'll exhaust his energy bit by bit. I bet he's going to generally look as tired as depressed Luz does below, even if he's had an acceptable hours of sleep per night:

That restlessness will be an awful psychological itch that he'll be unable to scratch, caused by losing Flapjack and now also Belos. This is the same as what happened with his anger in For the Future, except Belos was still alive back then. It will be harder to understand and messier to navigate the bereavement this time round. It'll be something gnawing into his soul which I really think only professional help can heal, especially since the show promotes that it's okay to not be okay, and more than okay to seek professional help (Steve and Lilith's conversation in Edge of the World).

He will be trying to claw his way out of that C-PTSD pit, but he'll be aware deep down that he simply cannot reach any emotional high points for long, and something will be blocking his feelings of connection with his loved ones. He won't feel nearly as free and easy the way he used to be in the human realm:

Having a routine like he used to in the Castle, and moving around a lot, was what helped him survive. However, he won't have the awareness that the shift resulting from Belos passing away has been at such a fundamental level: to the point that those old, supposedly tried-and-true methods no longer serve him in any positive way. At least, not until his mental health will be back in better shape.

As he puts in more and more effort to escape that restless emptiness, getting annoyed at himself because he doesn't know what's going on...he'll use up the rest of his strength and eventually crash. That itch won't be solved by going back to overworking tendencies, and like how it is with addiction cycles, he would need some kind of fix for the deep restlessness within. The answer? Productivity to feel useful, which we have seen even in his efforts to fix damaged clothing and well, making stuff in general.

Where the grimwalker graveyard comes in is...once he hears news about its existence, he will stubbornly insist to want to help in investigating it, saying he has already read a bunch of books about them, and can be useful, etc. Worse, if his offer to help to investigate is refused, he will do what he did in Eclipse Lake. Go to the location anyway, to fill that deep void within.

Old habits die hard.

I don't know if he may hear from King (who he'll be seeing fairly often, I think!), The Collector or even Kikimora about it. Since they were the three characters who went all the way down there in King's Tide, and The Collector already knew about these horrors for literal centuries. King and The Collector are also still young kids! Will they have the sensitivity and awareness about breaking this news to Hunter?!

On the other hand, I don't know how the timing will be with Darius, Raine and Eberwolf..Darius will want to get serious about investigating his mentor's disappearance. Once the searching and scouring extends to the location of the Head of the Titan, they will find the evidence staring them in the face. If they want to scour every inch of the Isles, there's also a high chance they'll find the godforsaken grimwalker lab.

Worst of all, Darius would be aware by then of how much Hunter loves to help out in operations like this to be productive. At the same time, Darius's own grief will surface even more, I'm not sure he'll be able to hide that, and Hunter is highly observant. If Darius is trying to hide his own priority of finding closure re: his mentor, I think Hunter will sense that.

Therefore I wonder if this will happen except it's Hunter with Darius:

and then this poor beloved skrunkly son of mine, who so famously said these words at the beginning of his arc:

is probably going to get reckless, and endanger his mental health...not unlike moments like this:

by venturing to the graveyard, whether stealthily or accompanying the grownups, because he'll rationalize it as "getting closure" and once again "being useful". Remember how used he is to moving around so much and being active, combined with growing up isolated so that asking for help can still be a foreign concept to him. He would be anxious about grinding to a halt, and he'd want to be on the move instead.

He may demand to see the graveyard, and holy Titan I'm not sure any dilemma will be as tricky for Camila and Darius to navigate as this one. Because preventing him from seeing something he already knows exists is, in a very twisted way, also an unhelpful form of avoidance. Avoidance is a hallmark criterion for diagnosing both PTSD and C-PTSD.

How far do they go in protecting him from himself? Where do they draw that line? They might reach a compromise where Camila and Darius accompany him there. Once he sees it, it'll hit harder than this:

Letting him see it means his new parents would have to fall with him, in the sense that they follow him to that emotional place: but while he figuratively does not have a safety harness when falling into this deep dark hole, Camila and Darius are equipped with harnesses a.k.a. higher maturity, less of a trauma history, and some tools to help him get better, navigate the trauma, and manage his symptoms.

Camila will have the warmth and sensitivity to catch and meet him as he falls (she interacts with animals in her profession, who don't have the capacity for human language, in a similar way to how serious trauma can't even be put into words at times: it makes you voiceless). Darius's shared past living in the Castle and grieving over his mentor will help Hunter not feel as alone once he has seen these horrors.

And because his heart generally became more open to receiving love and support,

I doubt he'll close himself off almost completely, the way he did in the first two-thirds of For the Future (god, remember these deleted storyboards??):

It wouldn't surprise me if he weeps and panics as soon as he sees the graveyard, and his parents give him maximum support through that breakdown. As complicated as it would be for Camila and Darius to give in to his desire to see the graveyard, a response like this from him - a child seeking attachment with proper timing - is a good sign of growing into healthy attachment with parental figures.

It is an arguably better response than one of the hardest aspects of C-PTSD: where the outpouring of grief only happens after a delay, sometimes a significant delay, at very inconvenient or strange times. Hell...if I were Hunter, I'd probably want Camila and Darius to just hold me close in wordless silence for half an hour until my initial distress and shock passes.

If I use King - a child who is securely attached to Eda, who's definitely had a more stable upbringing - as a control experiment here, he could have the appropriate response immediately in Echoes of the Past and expressed his emotional needs clearly enough:

Whereas this is what Hunter has to now learn, at twice King's age, as he settles in with new parents who take care of him instead of mistreating him the way Belos did. Hell, I can't imagine what kind of Belos punishment awaited him if he cried to demand attachment.

(I need to use more King scenes as a comparison to Hunter's upbringing in my next metas! I realize this can make my explanations clearer)

Anyway, what may happen next after he can't unsee the graveyard is...Hunter will then swing to the other extreme of high activity. I.e. being passive, physically inactive and psychologically crashing into depression, which may translate into habits such as oversleeping (catching up on all that lost sleep...but at what cost?). Supposedly sliding deeper into the C-PTSD pit. A place from which he has to express the desire to seek the forms of help he needs.

Remember that this kid has only known extremes for most of his life. Until he settles in properly with his found family and attends therapy, he has no clear reference point for more balanced approaches in living.

The trauma he went through is a quadruple whammy for a 16-year-old who just survived growing up in a cult. It would be so much. I can't see him not falling into months of deep dark depression, as unfortunate as this sounds.

Grieving over Flapjack, grieving over Belos, over his childhood/upbringing, and now a grisly memory of his predecessors who didn't make it (to add to what he saw in Belos's mindscape). I simply cannot see him handling a load like this without a highly-equipped and sensitive professional, paired with his support network of family, friends and even possibly the wider community at times. Especially now that we've seen him in action during the epilogue.

The epilogue sequence would've had a different feel (and in my opinion, a not-so-good feel) for me if Dana had established that the grimwalker graveyard was still untouched after those 3.5-4 years and if Hunter never found out about it. Something like that is different compared to Dana mentioning in the recent Post-Hoot that in the he does not know about Caleb and Evelyn, or that he is related to the Clawthornes. Mysteries like the Clawthorne heritage can remain an eerie secret that only us in the audience know about, but I wouldn't feel comfy if this were the case for the graveyard as well.

To quote @idlescree's video essay about Hunter's death (link), the show's writers didn't pull any punches when it came to Hunter's development arc. Which means they had to take his story to the "categorically appropriate place for him to overcome" his greatest challenges.

Something tells me that with respect to the grimwalker graveyard and the avoidance theme in C-PTSD recovery, Hunter would've had to put in more work to confront a number of terrifying foes even beyond his Thanks to Them speech. One of which was the graveyard containing the remains of his predecessors.

PS: This is a spontaneous post which branches out from my giant post-finale meta (link) that I pinned to my blog, I suppose.

[mochiimadness]

I wonder what it would be like for Splinter if he fell in love? This isn't an xreader thing, for obvious reasons. It's just a scenario I haven't really seen explored for his character, and I'm curious how you'd portray it.

Hello! I wasn’t sure which version of Splinter you wanted, so I did both! Also, I could write a splinter x reader if someone requested it (not sure what you meant by 'obvious reasons' /lh), I did not make this one a splinter x reader tho ^^

2012 Splinter

Oh Hamato Yoshi, a man of so little yet so many words-

It takes him a bit to actually fall in love

He is hesitant about pursuing another romantic relationship

Is genuinely traumatized from his last one

Rightfully so, he saw his wife die, daughter as well (or so he thought for years) all at the hands of someone he onced called his brother- only to get mutated soon after.

Yeah… not a very good experience…

But when he falls, he is absolutely devoted to his person

He is very formal, approaching his crush in a gentlemanly manner

Is kinda old fashioned

The type to bring flowers and open doors for his partner

When he was with Tang Shen, he ended up losing sight of what was important

And became very distant and dismissive

He knows better now, and makes sure to go out of his way to pay attention

He does still struggle though,

Often choosing to meditate over quality time

As his relationship grows, however, he becomes better at being present.

Makes sure to set time aside for his partner

He doesn’t mind doing whatever, but he does prefer quieter activities-

A drama show perhaps, or drinking tea together.

As he becomes more relaxed in his relationship-

His playful side emerges

And surprisingly- he can be very goofy

I mean- he has a cheese phone in a glass case. He chose that. It’s meant for serious emergencies- you can’t tell me he wasn’t making a joke about his current mutation.

He tells dad jokes- really corny ones too

And his laugh is a full-on belly laugh where he throws his head back

He enjoys making his beloved laugh,

Will sometimes even ask Michelangelo for any new jokes to tell!

Overall, he's very sweet, goofy and old-fashioned with his partner,

He is also incredibly protective- perhaps a bit over protective

But considering the fact that he and his family are being hunted down by the man who killed his last wife-

His over protectiveness is warranted.

Does NOT take chances- if his beloved is captured, he is going there and demolishing anyone who gets in his way.

Makes sure his beloved is okay, before taking them home to curl up and watch some old drama show

Cheese-sicles included.

Rise Splinter

This may or may not come as a surprise-

But I honestly think it takes him a while to truly fall in love with someone

I feel like he has some trust issues

Definitely has high walls when it comes to relationships

Being a popular celebrity back in day taught him a thing or two about letting people get too close

Most people were usually only after him for his fame and fortune-

Looking to use him to rise to the top themselves

So he made sure to keep a decent distance

Until Big Mama of course

Which only made his trust issues 100x worse.

If he were to fall in love again, it would only be after a long time

There needs to be a very strong, and very solid foundation of trust

He would like to avoid being locked up and forced to fight to the death again, thank you very much.

On top of his trust issues-

He has major abandonment issues

If he ever went through with trying to have another relationship,

There would need to be a lot of communication-

Lots of working on and assuring him that his partner isn’t going anywhere.

As for his behavior??

He’s very avoidant in a rather outgoing way

It’s kinda weird to witness actually

The second he realizes he actually has romantic feelings for someone- he’s panicking

Tries to avoid them but also makes sure to be nice

He’s nowhere in sight whenever his crush is around but if they happen to catch him?

He’s chatting up a storm, sitting them down for a cup of tea or some food

Casually handing them a slice of pizza and once their attention is on it

Poof- vanished from sight once they turn around.

Once he starts actually giving a relationship a try though??

Man is whipped with a capital W

THE BIGGEST SIMP EVER

Quality time??? Physical touch???? GIFT GIVING??!?!?!!

His crush is getting it all

Quality time is an absolute must, he always wants to be around them no matter what it is they’re doing.

Knitting? He’s there.

2am snacks?? He already has their favorite

Movie time???? He made sure his projector is completely repaired AND made the couch the comfiest spot ever.

Loves to cuddle and hold hands, generally likes to be in contact with his beloved in anyway he can

Will even wrap his tail around one of their limbs if his hands are full

*cough* or if he’s too lazy to move from his comfy position *cough*

And on top of that?? He actually has decent money from his time as Lou Jitsu

He can and will have his sons help him figure out online ordering.

His beloved is getting any and everything they want

Only the best for them, he makes sure to buy top quality items

A lot of the gifts are an eyesore to look at though- his personal taste is…. intense…

Thankfully, his family helps him out.

Overall a very attentive, but clingy, partner

Will proudly boast about his beloved to anyone who asks (or doesn’t)

Has one of those wallets with the long long photo strips

He shoves them in everyone’s faces

I hope you enjoyed!! Apologies for the long wait;;

[kenobster]

I dislike the headcanon that Anakin struggled to understand the difference between "master" in a slavery context and "master" in a mentorship context.

Even though it's usually held by Anakin stans, this headcanon actually robs Anakin of some of his best, most compelling traits. Anakin (at nine years old) is portrayed as compassionate (eager to help at great risk to himself with no hope of reward), competent (able to make tactical decisions and perform great engineering feats under a wild amount of stress), and wickedly smart (among other things, he regularly supplies ideas on how to work around Watto's bullshit). If you and I are able to comprehend the difference between "master" as denoting a cruel participator in the enslavement of another human being and "master" as denoting a wise mentor who has achieved expertise in both skill and ethical conduct, then Anakin, even as a child, can certainly figure it out. His admiration for the Jedi would inevitably lead him to ask the necessary questions. By virtue of his compassion, he would strive to see things from their POV. And his competence/intelligence would allow him to comprehend their answers. Not to mention, Anakin is an expert on slavery. He has been studying this subject for nine intense years. He knows exactly what slavery looks like. Thus, jumping straight from Watto's ownership and into the Jedi's care, Anakin would recognize in an instant that Jedi mentorship is not slavery. In short, he's smarter than you. (And don't tell me you don't get it. You're reading this post on tumblr(dot)com, so I know damn well you learned the term "sensei." Don't play dumb with me.)

Thus, I'm very disappointed that people overwhelmingly write Anakin, as a padawan, having a fraught relationship with Obi-Wan in regards to calling him "master." I see this headcanon manifest a few different ways: (1) the Jedi explain what "master" means, which results in Anakin being upset and choosing not to not call Obi-Wan or anyone "master" (at least for a time); (2) the Jedi (who, in these fics, are implied to be dumb at best or ignorant at worst) do not explain what "master" means, and Anakin silently grows up traumatized by having to call Obi-Wan or anyone "master"; (3) some combination of the former; or (4) the subject is never raised; thus, no contradiction to the former is presented. (Authors of fics that fall into the no. 4 category are obviously not to blame for the former three scenarios; I'm just making an observation that little alternative exists--at least, not to my knowledge... Feel absolutely free to send your recs.)

It's a really strange headcanon to appear so commonly because major canon contradicts it entirely. In the prequel trilogy, Anakin regularly calls Obi-Wan "master" as a term of endearment. Even at his most obnoxious in AotC, Anakin only ever says "master" in a tone better than or equal to neutral (which actually still defaults to respect purely by nature of the word that is being used). In fact, there are plenty of opportunities for Anakin to use the term resentfully (i.e. during the scene "You will pay attention to my lead" -> ">:( Why?"), but he never does. In contrast, he conveys enormous respect for Obi-Wan both to his face ("Then why don't you listen to me?" -> ":( I am trying") and in a private setting ("as wise as Master Yoda and as powerful as Master Windu"). The best evidence supporting otherwise is how he calls people "mister" in TPM. However, this happens prior to Anakin's indoctrination into Jedi culture, and we don't know why he is doing it. Nothing suggests an aversion to the way the Jedi use the term "master"; it could be something as simple as a custom-made-habit from Tatooine .

Based on these samplings, canon strongly suggests an alternative to the dominant opinion: Anakin experiences absolutely no distress from calling Obi-Wan "master" and he has been doing so of his own volition from a very young age.

I think the reason why the opposite opinion is so popular is because of how much Anakin's past is the catalyst for so many plot elements, including his characterization as Vader. Even as an adult, slavery is a giant source of trauma for him. Freedom and autonomy (or the lack thereof) are two of the central pillars to his character arc (all the way from "I'm a person and my name is Anakin" to "henceforth, you shall be known as Darth Vader" ... and then, back again to "just for once, let me look upon you with my own eyes"). It's clear that words are important to Anakin, and they can be weaponized against him--so it's easy to see how people got here. But I reject the notion that the Jedi (nurturers, peacekeepers, scifi buddhist monks) are doing any form of word-weaponizing, even unintentionally (when their whole thing is about being mindful/empathetic/compassionate, especially about alternate POVs).

I especially reject this notion when an actual emotional abuser is standing right there, next to Anakin, at all points in his Jedi life. Word-weaponizing is sort of what emotional abusers do. And you know who is responsible for blurring the line between "master" in a slave context and "master" in a mentorship context? Palpatine. Palpatine is the true culprit of the mechanism in this popular headcanon. He knows very well that Anakin is coming from a place in which "master" has, for a long time, meant wisdom/endearment/teaching/mentoring. He encourages this assumption and deliberately blinds Anakin to the fact that "master" in a Sith context actually means slavery. Vader becomes Sidious's slave in every aspect of the word. He calls Sidious his master, he bends himself to Sidious's every whim/command, he wears the cage that Sidious constructs for him--and he doesn't even realize it. Because Palpatine has twisted the word "master" into both a term of endearment and a term of superiority. Anakin can no longer tell the difference between learning and serving because Palpatine has made them the same thing. In the end, Anakin does become distressed at the word "master" but only because of Palpatine's abuse.

In short, enough of Anakin being dumb and incompetent and unempathetic as a padawan. Enough of the Jedi Order being either cruel or ignorant when it comes to Anakin's past as a slave. I get the urge, I really, really do (because Anakin's trauma post-slavery is super fucking addictive)... but friends. You're putting this urge into the wrong place. I beseech you--please come join me in this new playground, in this fun paradise!

Let the emotionally abusive Sith Lord emotionally abuse your darling!

Let. Palpatine. Make. Anakin. Suffer. :)

[1941-crowley-slut]

I just wanna say I really love that queer shows lately have started to cast people who aren't teenagers or in their early 20s. Even in the case of good omens where all the beings are technically eternal so their body is just a vessel, it's still so very refreshing to see queer love and gender non conforming characters that look about middle aged. It's such a nice reminder that queerness is not a trend, it's not new, it's not something only young people are experiencing. I would actually argue that seeing so much queerness in good omens (which by the way was incorporated very beautifully into it, without feeling forced or being made a big deal) makes it even better, because it shows how it has all existed since the beginning of time.

And I also love the actors who are totally alright with playing such roles. Don't get me wrong, they should be fine playing them, that's the bare minimum. But we are now just starting to get the bare minimum in that sense, people not being too insecure to play queer characters, in spite of if they share the same identity with their character or not.

Their age (the actors') is very important to me as well. Because though the younger generation tends to be more accepting, we see constantly a lot of homophobia and transphobia from the previous ones. And we often pin it on their age, "oh they were born in a different time, I don't expect them to understand". Yet there are all these people out there the same age as those you make up excuses for, who understand perfectly. If they can, then so can everyone else, even if they come from a different generation.

Lastly, I love how humane they are finally portraying queer people on the big screen. I love that there can be physical affection and canon events that aren't just subtext, I love that they can show a sexual relationship between two queer people without fetishizing it (because I've seen one too many queer movies hoping for a love story, that turned out to be borderline porn). I love when they don't include traumatic homophobic/transphobic events for every single queer character or don't load them with guilt over their identity. Not that these experiences shouldn't be shown, because a lot of us can relate to them and it's always so nice to be able to relate to a character, feel like someone understands what you're going through. It just gets a tad exhausting when every plotline eventually leads to that.

Generally, I 'm glad they are finally treating us like normal people. Because we are.

[aty-art-blog]

TWST MAIN SPOILER PART 6. PART 7 THEORIES. MASQUERADE EVENT DETAILS; SILVER CHARACTER ANALYSIS

And I posted this some months ago...and I'm theorising that Lilia might die, because of his age...and those words and also Silver words about his father not being so well anymore, make me think about it more and more...

MASQUERADE EVENT DETAILS:

...............................................

MASQUESLRADE EVENT SPOILERS BELOW.

SILVER MINI CHARACTER ANALYSIS below

An important note on Silver character:

In the fandom , obviously for meme, Silver is always portrayed as an himbo... I can't think of anything more wrong. Silver probably in whole twisted wonderland (with Ace) is the most emotionally intelligent , witted and belligerent person. We superficially see him as an himbo because he has not malevolence, he literally lived in the middle of nowhere with a fae trying to understand how to grow up a human... thus justifying Silever mindset to not take as evil malevolence. Faes are in myths and common knowledge creatures who, for fun, make a lot of mischievous acts, not to damage people or hurting but because of their very nature as beings whose live for centuries and have different perception of things, (Disney also portrayed it with Tinkerbell), so as result of living among faes is totally understandable why Silver has this kind of mindset where he doesn't see/ perceive malevolence as something threatening or enouth serious to give to it importance. Yet emotionally Silver, as told before, is really emotively intelligent (and we can understand that from all his vignettas, and cards and events; remarkable is the Halloween event of last year scary monster, if you don't remenber it please read it again expecially his interaction with Jamil);

Silver is really perceptive of others, here we see how through Lilia he understand Trein sensei circumstances, no one except him noticed and gave importance about this, so the "short-comings" we all in the fam give to Silver are misgiven, Silver's short comings are due his narcolepsy and through the fact that he lived more among other species than humans, so he only lacks experience, not intelligence, he's not an himbo.

In conclusion I want to make you notice how mature he is respect Malleus; Silver always noticed and told us plenty times that Lilia was aging and he tell it being aware and ready for what it will happen... following the natural flow of life, Silver is ready for it to happen, Malleus no, if Lilia pass away for Malleus it will be a traumatic strike, he is immature and for him, for faes being essentially immortal and infallible is a given, death is something that for him is way distant and evanescent...

Thus where my observations. Before part seven. I'll rewatch all about Silver's cards, events ect. And I'll make an exclusive character analysis about him. Because it's DEFINITELY not true that we have only few clues about his character.

I personally think that he is one of the most underrated, by superficiality, character in twst, when instead is a character fully studied and soo well written that deserve to have a lot more.

He is definetly one of my favourite characters, at the start I underrated him really badly, because to me he was the less outstanding character among the cast, yet he really managed step by step to grow on me, he is an amazing written character, my upmost respect to everyone who worked on his characterization🙇🏻‍♀️

I hope this may be , usefull, or at least interesting

If you may be interestd I also made a mini analysis about Cater Diamond(an other of my favourite characters in twst)

For a further analysis about Lilia you can also read these posts:

-Faes

-Lilia Vanrouge ssr birthday 3rd year bouquet

[time-woods]

I started following you on youtube a while back, and then i found you here on tumblr like a few weeks ago. While looking at your art today, i went on your youtube trough your tumblr, and my brain was like, ". . ." I hadn't realized you were the same person. I was so surprised, and it connected straight away. I got really, really happy. The two people whose art i find really pretty and nife are the same person! Your dhmis video introduced me to the dumb dumb song. I adore everything in the video, from how you portray feelings to your style and the colors.

I need to tell you. your videos, they helped me cope with me losing my home and the traumatic experiences that happen after. I really want to thank you. Thank you for creating art. It brought me happiness when i really needed it. Thank you for existing. You bring lots and lots of people joy. I hope you have a great day💜

Thank you so much! ! gosh i never thought my work would ever do something like that, i hope your doing well/ better now ! ! im glad i could help, thank you so so so much,, <33! !

[auncyen]

Same anon with the mira and bonnie ask, lobed your response but felt weird to just put it in w/o a question so if you don’t mind:

what do you think siffrin’s life was like before joining the party? Could be pre- or post- forgotten island. Idk to me its fascinating bc they were loved in some measure (cloak, jokingly running away bc of veggies) and are p in touch with their culture when they remember it, but at the same time siffrin’s mindset is pretty unhealthy. Like even before looping/during act 2 loops, they seemed unconcerned about serious bodily harm and death that would happen to them + just seems to have. A very strange relationship with people feeling sad instead of happy around them? Idk i just don’t think that’s from just the memory loss.

See I think kid Siffrin was pretty happy. As Isabeau notes whoever gave them the cloak and hat must have really loved them. When Siffrin recounts running away it's in a carefree way--he knew he could give his parents a scare and it'd go down as "just a prank". Basically their home life was really good. There are questions I have about the island's beliefs / values that might be troublesome, but I don't really think that sort of thing grates on a kid with a happy home life too much. (And also as a little note the only glimpse we get into the island's beliefs/values are through Siffrin and King, two individuals who cannot recall those things completely and are very traumatized, so like. Should probably take a grain of salt on how they portray the beliefs anyway.)

Post-island I admittedly read a LOT into how Siffrin finds Vaugarde's openness weird and had kept their hair dyed up until a few months pre-game.

In his experience, other countries are not as welcoming. So I imagine their teenage years were probably pretty lonely. This isn't to say other countries were completely awful--he obviously enjoyed Poteria's plays!--but they were juuust old enough where few would assume just by looking at them "uh, you're on your own, do you need help?" If they stayed long enough in a spot for people to figure out something was wrong it'd invite questions like "where are you from", "where are your parents", basically questions that'd make Siffrin's head hurt and probably lead to them cutting off the interaction if the other person doesn't walk away first because they're put off or alarmed by Siffrin's reactions. Basically, there probably WERE well-meaning attempts to help Siffrin. They backfired because people didn't know what was wrong with Siffrin (Siffrin didn't know what was wrong with Siffrin). Siffrin probably beat himself up for it when he knew the other person was trying to help and he was just too "broken". As a teenager he probably stayed longest in places where adults assumed he was a runaway that didn't want to talk about it and maybe helped him out in a more "hands-off" way--"hey, run this errand for me and I'll give you dinner and a roof for the night". Which, great! Because Siffrin finds a way to get by. But it doesn't deal with any of the emotional issues festering inside.

I also feel like, while this may be a bit dark for the fantasy setting, Siffrin probably got targeted at times for being a young traveler on their own. I mean I also headcanon that Siffrin was very good at escaping dicey situations, partially because they'd start Wish Crafting unconsciously if they were really scared, so they were never seriously harmed. But they weren't good experiences to have!

I also kind of headcanon that pre-canon with not knowing who they are like--they loved plays. But also, like. I can see them at times hurting when they think about plays, how they'd be portrayed in a play. No true name, no past, no home, no relations. At best they're the jester who mocks a King gone wrong and makes the audience laugh. At worst they're a side character killed off-stage in a tragedy, barely important enough to devote two lines to. What kind of play would have a protagonist with zero emotional stake in anything?

They try to be the jester, at least. Sometimes, when he's feeling brave enough. It tends to fizzle pretty quickly. (And then he meets someone who doubles over laughing at a bad pun.)

So yeah I feel like Siffrin pretty much mastered the art of getting by and also as in this post actually being pretty good at fighting pre-canon, but socially well. They can ask directions in at least half a dozen languages but can't be honest about how they're feeling or what's going on with them in a single blinding one. Then they meet a group that's in desperate need of another fighter and 2 of them are Vaugardians who are willing to accept Siffrin's eccentricities as just part of them and not ask questions and Odile's pragmatic enough to not rock the boat unnecessarily. I pretty much do view the group as being the first chance Siffrin remembers getting to bond with people without it going south by them wanting to know their background. Of course he loves them. Of course it doesn't really matter what happens to him, who's going to miss him?? They have homes and families and friends. They're the real heroes. He's just supporting cast.

...So yeah tl;dr pre-island vanishing I think Siffrin's life was just fine. post-island was an incredible amount of loneliness and the Universe putting his brain in a blender and idly hitting the pulse button every so often. This is not even getting into experiencing the physical side of puberty while not knowing who you are or who to ask for help, which, yikes.

[hot-take-tournament]

Yanderes aren't for everyone, so I've included a content warning.

HOT TAKE TOURNAMENT!

PRELIMINARY #223

Submission 720

yanderes are good, actually

i know for a fact this is hot because the inverse take was validated earlier. but i'm also gonna justify it just because.

the yandere trope is good and cool. people bash it for being a glorification of abuse or "toxic" or basically... bizarre and disturbing. but have you ever stopped to consider consensual yandere tropes? because the problem isn't ACTUALLY the "yandere" behavior, it's that in "classical" yandere media, it's portrayed as unwanted or frightening to the recipient. the problem is that it's portrayed as unconsenting. but that isn't a problem that's UNIQUE to the yandere genre.

whereas, if you were to consider a consensual yandere relationship...

what if the recipient WANTED someone to be a little obsessive, controlling, devoted to them? what if, in all their devotion, the yandere LISTENED to feedback and catered to their partner's wants and needs? what if "yandere" is simply a trope designed for the weird, the broken, the overinvested, the traumatized? what if to be loved possessively is not a sign of abuse, but a metric of security? what if a yandere is simply a person who is too broken to be well adjusted to the conventional levels at which society expects them to love? what if that love is so WARPED by their lived experience that it appears bizarre and shocking and frightening to the public, but warm and intense and unrelenting, unyielding and securely present, to its recipient? what if, such a person could exist, that would only feel at ease with such a devoted and intense form of love? what then? what if being a yandere were about jealousy and selfishness and possessiveness and control, but moreover, about devotion and care and dedication and conviction to never leave, to care deeply and passionately even when it doesn't seem acceptable, to love in a way that feels safe and ensured.

the yandere trope represents intense and broken lovers and i unironically love it. i WILL die on this hill.

Can I... tell you a secret? It's kind of embarassing, so... keep it between us, okay? I said this poll was for everyone, but really, it was only for you... so I hope you liked it!

Maybe this is a little too forward, but I'd love it if you posted propaganda! B-but you don't have to, if you don't want to! Just being seen by you, being able to be near you... that would be enough... for now, that's enough...

And it's okay for you to reblog our favourite polls for exposure... it feels weird sharing our special things, having everyone see my love for you... but it makes me happy! I want them to know - to know that you're mine... But if you don't reblog them, that makes me happy too! It's like I get to keep you all to myself...

[RESPONSES TO THE ORIGINAL TAKE BELOW]

[probablyhuntersmom]

Big "T" and Small "t" Trauma Portrayed in The Owl House

Warnings: abuse and trauma mentions ahead.

I thought of putting together a post of its own to highlight an aspect of trauma that has been incorporated into the show. This post will be added to my TOH-related mental health masterpost that will be uploaded after the S3 finale, Watching and Dreaming, is released.

Big “T” traumatic events are singular, standalone, life-altering events that don’t happen repeatedly. The type that replays in your mind weeks, months or years after it happens. They can significantly change your perceptions and physiology, and aren't necessarily just about physical harm. Examples are a car crash, a life-threatening injury, getting publicly humiliated, or a natural disaster.

Small “t” traumatic events are importantly still very distressing, and can repeat over time. One of my therapists described this as drops of water falling on a rock again and again, eroding the rock over time (while big “T” would be a single big smash against the rock that leaves a pretty noticeable crack or two). Examples of small “t” are emotional abuse, a loud noise along a street, and smaller scale versions of bigger events that aren’t an immediate danger or which happen after you have established/reached safety e.g. seeing something that reminds you of someone, that makes you feel distress. If you were a parentified kid, like Hunter (having to overextend himself in dangerous situations to be Belos's punching bag), you will have definitely have experienced small "t" trauma to some degree.

This concept was first introduced to me by the best therapist I had. Each of these two types would be treated in different ways. Both types can be experienced differently by each person, since we each have unique life histories and unique combinations of risk factors (that may worsen one’s mental health) and protective factors (that can improve one’s mental health).

E.g. a car crash may not actually feel like a big “T” trauma experience for some people, while certain incidents of more intense psychological abuse that don’t involve physical harm, could be a big “T” incident for other people because it is life-altering.

I’m pretty sure almost everybody has gone through both “T” and “t” trauma to some degree. If you have been affected by trauma, managing your symptoms, and the way in which you receive support from trusted loved ones (and if you choose to see one, a therapist), will be different depending on whether it is the aftermath of big “T” or small “t” events that need to be attended to. If you have experienced both types, you'd need to attend to each differently. This will manifest differently for each person.

Big “T” events can really quickly change the meanings you subconsciously give to things about yourself (e.g. how strong you thought you were) and things around you (e.g. How safe is the world I live in? In what ways does the world feel different now?), changing those into negative associations. With small “t”, the same thing can happen on a smaller scale but it may be easier to turn those negative perceptions around and nudge them in a positive direction. You may benefit from being equipped with reframing tools e.g. journaling, hanging out with safe people, creative outlets like dance or art classes, etc.

Hunter is written so darn well and the production crew have overall made good distinctions between the big “T” and small “t” incidents that he experienced.

Big “T” incidents in the show are the big reveal in Hollow Mind, watching Belos 'die' (I'm wondering what must've been going through his mind when watching his friends put up the drawings of their loved ones in the refurbished shack..), being possessed, and losing Flapjack. Can’t deny that they were life-altering:

Small “t” incidents he went through include, and there are..........so many of them:

(The number of them that are in Labyrinth Runners alone is bonkers)

but we need to remember that small “t” can still be very distressing to go through: we don’t wanna invalidate or minimize that.

Even in the therapy room, if I have a client who has experienced both types, I may not necessarily attend to a client's big "T" wounds first, even though at first that may seem like the logical formulaic thing to do. Because if the client finds that too painful, we could always start by working on small "t" wounds. That's how case by case things can be for mental health treatment.

For a few other Hunter scenes it is less straightforward, e.g. his manic behaviour in Eclipse Lake:

And the haircut-related panic attack:

though I’m inclined to think these are small “t” because I don’t think he will look back on these incidents years later and become disturbed just by recalling them.

The kind of note I want to end on however...might not be what you'd expect.

One of the other Labyrinth Runners moments is a small "t" event that is not listed above. To this day it is my fave snippet in the entire show even after watching Thanks to Them, because from a clinical and thematic perspective I find it realistic, layered and powerful, so much contained in just under 15 seconds:

Because this little experience, while obviously unpleasant for Hunter (likely getting him to emotionally flash back to the moments where Belos almost killed him) for a short time, was also good for him because a safe trusted person was present to hold the space for him. There is both bad and good at play here, ultimately good because contact/connection was willingly made between them both (Hunter could have chosen to shut him out, but in the 3rd and 4th frames it is so telling how deep down this kid truly wants to connect...which is a basic need anyway).

We in the audience already know that Gus is a safe person - though Hunter doesn't believe that yet - who has come along at last to cross paths with him, outside of the Emperor's Coven and after Hunter has fled from that coven. And Gus asks out of genuine concern, "What's going on with you?" which breaks the icy layer of avoidance and detachment that Hunter has been trying to put up since he dashed out of the Owl House in the middle of his first panic attack.

Re-experiencing trauma can't be totally avoided, but the connection you could experience 1. with the people you trust while they support you, and 2. with yourself while using helpful tools and resources on your own.....especially when you have #1 and/or #2 while you are re-experiencing something difficult memories: that is the powerful stuff that could keep you going.

As you might be able to tell, I love this kid so muchhh 😭 He has helped me connect better with my inner child than ever before, on top of my past therapy sessions, he helps me as a licensed clinician to notice textbook stuff that is applied in a practical way, without me having to do as much guesswork on the go with real clients! And I have read on this site that his story has helped other fans to notice things about themselves that should be attended to with care and love.

[candyskiez]

Yo, what do you think about jasper, her arc and character as a whole?

(Also your explanation of pearl was so good I loved it)

oooo good question!

jasper, imo, is a very good portrayal of an abuser. she's so realistic, dude. she isn't evil, mustache twirling. she's a person who's abusive and THATS what makes her relationship with lazuli gutwrenching. because it's something you'd see in real life. it's not black and white. it's two deeply fucked up and traumatized people hurting each other. it's not good vs evil. it's two people who are horrible for each other.

jasper is just. extremely realistic to me. she's someone who hurts people around her to make them stay, to make them look at her and admit that she's strong. she needs constant external validation because nothing fills that void in her life of someone treating her better. she hurts everyone and then is crushed by them leaving. she's so interesting because she NEEDS people near her but shes the one shoving them out. she's the one constantly hurting them and they leave to get away from being mistreated. it's. she has so much pressure and experiences so much constant mistreatment and she's convinced it's what makes her strong, it's what makes her special. to admit she's hurting would be to be weak. she convinces herself anyone leaving is a sign of weakness. it's not because of *her*, it's not because what she's like is bad. because admitting how she treats people is wrong is admitting how SHE was treated is wrong. and she can't do that. she can't handle reevaluating her entire identity being the next battle and the next fight and how much pain she can take. she can't let herself even consider changing, because that means admitting she was miserable. and only a weak gem would hate how they're supposed to be.

she's a victim and an abuser, those things aren't mutually exclusive and I wish people wouldn't act like they were. she was hurt so fucking badly, and she also hurt so many people so fucking badly.

her "everyone I fuse with leaves me" was haunting, man. it's, again, a very accurate depiction of an abuser who was caught in the cycle. you want to grab her and shake her and say, stop you're hurting yourself you're ruining your own life. but she refuses to see it and she refuses to get better and it. hurts to watch.

I see her as a cautionary tale. nobody can force you to change. YOU have to look at yourself and ask if you're the problem. YOU have to look at how you treat others before you scream that they left you. YOU have to look at your life and ask, is this what I want?

she's a cautionary tale and works well as one.

there is one thing I don't really like and that's how her being shattered was handled? her being shattered completely and then some how brought back was. Cheap, ngl. although her reaction to being shattered was. fucking terrifying. obviously from stevens point of view but also it's just so fucking telling about her mental state. she romanticized being shattered. she romanticized the thought of dying gloriously in battle. she respected steven for shattering her. it's just. fucking *horrifying.* did she WANT to be shattered? holy shit, is jasper suicidal ? the implications are. Awful. I don't want her to be around the others because she keeps hurting them but at the same time I'm going "someone fucking HELP her!" but she doesn't WANT help and it's. it's fucking hard to watch. she's so set on her own destruction and it's physically painful. she can't get better until *she* decides she wants to. that's the only way her pains going to stop.

I also don't like the way steven shattered her. I wish it was portrayed more how his thoughts of shattering white was. his anger, his trauma towards her, his hatred of how much pain she gave him and the fact he's just supposed to be FINE with it now. shattering jasper, though it told us a lot about her, ultimately felt repetitive? because I mean, we already get steven's urge to shatter white. and it's handled a little better. maybe steven going too far and severely damaging jaspers gem and her still being impressed to make the audience go "jasper wtf are you good" and "OH SHIT STEVEN" at the same time, while also adding more weight to his anger at white diamond,, I dunno, this is my scattered ramblings.

I get why some people wanted a redemption arc for jasper. I don't think there was enough time to make a satisfying one. I do think she could potentially heal still, but she HAS to realize it herself. everyone keeps trying to give her tools to heal, she refuses to take them. she has to start working on herself. I'm not against a jasper redemption whatsoever, hell I think if done right it could be good.

a thing I do want to say though, FUCK the idea of her getting back with lapis. they are *horrible* for each other. and I mean this both ways. both of them hurt and traumatized each other. lapis was miserable with her and *jasper was too.* they both can heal but they need to do that completely separately thank you very much.

confession, I have an OC named jasper so I was VERY confused by this ask at first. was about to write a five page essay on him. oops 😭 I have to refer to this jasper as jasper (gem) with my friends. which is also hard considering a nickname for jasper (OC) IS gem. and ironically in the steven universe au me and one friend are working on, jasper (oc) is a pearl, not a jasper, and it's. Yeah! we are so good at this.

hope you enjoyed my scrambled ramblings ksgdldjdk. sorry for disjointedness this isn't like a professional meta or anything it's just me rambling about a cool show.

(ask me things!)

[ecivons]

Zosan/Sanzo Fic list

I just wanted to make a list of the fics I've read/Fic recommendations for anyone out there. The ones in bold purple are my absolute favorites. (A lot have M/E ratings and Adult language)

Falling by sorrowfulcheese - The dialogue.. the pacing.. THE CRUST I loved it all. One of the first zs fics haha, it's only tag is fluff. It barely feels like fluff fluff, this is just Zosans personal brand of fluff.

Liquid Courage by sabershadowkat (E) - Sanji experiences drunk Zoro once and keeps trying to sleep with him. (!! some dubious consent the first time). The last line is what got me.

[I saved a lot of shadowsaberkat works, just scroll through their entire account if you're okay with M+ fics]

Alongside All The Way by sabershadowkat (E) - I liked the Adventures going on in the background of the fic. Sort of a compilation of Zoro and Sanji becoming more and more important to eachother

Bit by Bit by sabershadowkat - Getting together type beat. A few moments of Zoro slowly dealing with his emotions for Sanji.

Falling Blossoms by sabershadowkat - I'm usually picky about established but I love the way they write <3. It's short and sweet. Just a lil Zosan date.

Things Unsaid (E) - Established Relationship. Zoro gets injured and they're forced to wait out a snow storm while working through their relationship. (I love this person's characterization of them wayy too much)

Rules of Love (E) - It’s one of those fics.. (conflict, sex, resolution) just the way I like my Zosan. A little internalized homophobia on Sanji's part.

when you say by bluewalk - Unrequited Usosan. Zosan from the perspective of a pining Usopp. (Beautiful, a bit confusing but I loved reading it)

tricks out of your sleeves by bluewalk - Zoro and Sanji are forced to learn a few things about each other's past. IMO it's written pretty gen. I love the character exploration.

Myalgia by Salmon_Pink - An exploration of how Zoro and Sanji talk about thriller bark (they don’t). They used the mood prompt so well the tension was welling up in my chest the entire time.

Understandable by Salmon_Pink (M) - Another short fic by Salmon Pink because they write the two of them amazingly. Zoro and Sanji who will never be emotionally vulnerable with each other out loud.

destructivity is a poison that runs through our veins by wasteofmind (M.. its E to me) - They want to kill each other.

Residue of a Rainbow by Narcissistic_Ninny (E) - Zoro and Sanji go through a traumatic experience and maybe fall in love too. This person has amazing fics, but this is definitely my favorite. Zoro is good at hiding what he's thinking but you just know..

green with envy blues by adietxt - Really short fic with jealous Zoro. I saved it mainly because the narration is a little funny.

it's a long way forward by donutsandcoffee - Sanji can't smile because of a devil fruit. The strawhats love his smile..

you got that something by adietxt - Sanji is forced to stick to Zoro. Nothing but a bundle of fluff and self-indulgence that I enjoyed all the same.

(failed) Stewardship by LibbyLune - Soulmate AU. Sanji's has been dead for a long time. Author has such an amazing take on soulmates I love it. I love Luffy's especially. P.S. The authors note at the end made me fall to my knees.

the universe told me by rudimentaryflair - Soulmate AU. Zoro desperately hides his soul mark while learning about his nakama's. I like how its almost the opposite of how Zoro and Sanji were portrayed in the previous fic I recommended (when it comes to their opinions on soulmates). I love both though.

blood, salt and idiocy by rosie_peverell - Zoro gets a taste of his own medicine. (Sanji gets injured trying to save him). It's short and cute.

and then the sun came out by demonzoro (shrinewreck) - Takes place in pre-ts, post-ts and future. Zosan realizing they're "friends". Extremely Tender idk what to tell you.

a catalog of non-definitive acts by demonzoro (shrinewreck) - Zoro pines. Nothing I say could possibly convey the emotions this fic makes me feel. You just need to give it a read I promise.

for poor and poorer still by rudimentaryflair - Modern AU. Short and sweet. Zoro finally finds the perfect moment to propose.

how normal people do by rudimentaryflair - Namivivi Pov. This is so funny. I love the best friend drinking buddy dynamic of Nami and Zoro. This fic has funny moments that I remember in public and start laughing to myself about.

paging mr. swordsman by rosie_peverell - If I had a nickel for every Modern AU Zosan ficlet that takes place in a grocery store..

The Fall of a Hundred Things by LibbyLune - Sanji sleeps with Zoro after a party one night and it messes him up. Franky is the MVP of this fic. I love him. (Check out author for more good works)

End On A High Note by thisislegit - Modern AU. Established Sanji and Zoro have problems they need to talk about. (Oh how I love the ups and downs of a mundanely domestic relationship)

In Your Warm Embrace by marimoliciousness - Sanji is an idiot and realizes something about Zoro (himself). They get caught in a snowstorm.

migratory animals by donutsandcoffee - Sanji is strong in a way that fascinates Zoro

that's all for now!! I might consider adding more in the future.

[cass-rambles]

Hiii guys, after my last .. uh theory thingy I'm back to ramble more. (About mostly Morty Prime this time). Because I'm very normal about R&M I promise. :D

Anyways! (Major spoilers for season 7 ahead!!!)

I've been thinking about season 7 again, as well as the earlier seasons, and I've got a few ideas/possibilities/plot bunnies of what the writers of Rick and Morty might do for Morty.

The thing is, season 7 had somewhat really juggled Morty's character back and forth between its development and regression for Unmortricken, giving more light to the rest of the Smith family and Rick. I don't mean to phrase this negatively, but compared to earlier seasons, Morty seems to more of just being there, not taking into mind the episodes w Rick Prime and episode 10 of the latest season.

And this brings me to my point: What will they do with Morty's character and development now?

Let's take all things into consideration:

Rick Prime is gone/dead (hopefully permamently but it could be an interesting throwback)

Rick C-137 can be now actively allowed to heal

There is nothing (particularly) endangering their whole family

Evil Morty returned to his paradise island and there doesn't seem to be a strong/certain reason for him to return to the Central Curve

So the new arc, by technicality, should consist of Morty's and Rick's healing, right? Right???

That's what I thought of at first, but there's a good chance it's not as clear as it may appear.

For example, let's talk about the last episode of season 7. Throughout all of it we have the dissection of Rick's and Morty's fears, even as far as having an accurate Diane in it. It portrays how many fears and worries Morty Prime has accumulated through the seasons, including, of course, not being accepted, his fear of being replaced (THANKS RICK <3🙄) and many more. My point here is, that his trauma runs deep, it's hard-rooted into his character and almost unmovable. The most fucked up thing about it in the ep, is that Morty receiveing positive attention from Rick, is what made him realize that he's the only one in the hole. Because he doesn't believe Rick would consciously describe him as an irreplacable person in his life.

Which brings me to one of my key-thought-out-problems. Can Morty Prime even heal properly, at least around his family?

Chances are: it might be a HUGE FUCKING ISSUE.

(To be fair here, I'm not an entirely objective theorizer, even though I'm trying to stay as neutral as I can, please take my ideas with a grain of salt.)

Morty Prime actively thinks that all healthy affection he receives from Rick isn't actually received from Rick (most likely paranoia from the Rickbot arc) or that he's in a scenario in which his family isn't real. His counsciousness has already started to agree and intertwine into his approach all of the things and actions that have previously hurt the teen. (For example, if his family lashes out at him, he's being ridiculed or hurt by them to some degree, then it must mean they're real. It is an objective truth.) And it makes me think that Morty may need to be away from his family to be able to acknowledge each of his traumatic experiences in order to attempt moving on from them.

I think that Morty in order to heal, will have to learn that he doesn't have to focus on others all the time and can learn how to depend on himself, because he lacks trust even in his own thoughts. And so far, Morty has barely digested his trauma, more of "shelving" it away for later or having occasional meltdowns once he's under too much pressure. He always seems to be stuck in survival mode in some way, meaning that his brain prioritizes keeping him alive, rather then caring for the damage.

So by those thoughts, it is a possibility that Rick's healing and Morty's healing, cannot partake side by side, and therefore may result in Morty leaving his family to achieve healthy progress.

Either way, this is all just speculating and my ideas, but I hope it helped some people in their own theories. (My inbox is VERY open to rambling about R&M in ANY WAY.)

(Side idea for my enjoyment: Morty leaving his family can play into the theory that Morty Prime may actively search out Evil Morty to understand how he can achieve a process and goal in which he doesn't "cling" to his family and Rick.)