#tw: forced fusion

[lenorethequietbookkeeper]

@badthingshappenbingo

Prompt: Don't You Dare Pity Me

CW: Isolation (mentioned), pain, body horror, forced fusion

Characters: Human! Luni, Corrupted! Lilith, Monster! Lunith

Fandom: Anime Gacha/Gacha World (rewrite AU with a friend)

-----

When she first awoke, the only things that greeted her were darkness and sore bones. She groaned weakly as she attempted to rise, but she immediately felt something holding her back. When she turned, she found her hands were cuffed to heavy black chains trailing endlessly behind her. Grogginess very quickly turned to panic, and Luni began to break into a cold sweat.

"Uh, hello?" she questioned the darkness. She was obviously anxious about the situation, but she knew better than to show her fear. That was probably what the sick bastard who took her wanted. "Wh-what the fuck is this? Where am I?!"

"Oh, you've finally awoken," an unseen presence coldly noted. Luni immediately jolted. She...she knew that voice. Its breathy femininity was instantly recognizable. Yet, the voice lacked the warmth and joy it almost always carried. "I hope you rested well, darling," Luni's all too familiar captor finished, a hiss of hatred ending off her words.

The impenetrable, black mist suddenly parted, revealing her prison to be a barren, endless desert. Just above her head, bathed in lavender moonlight, a winged succubus silently drifted down to confront her prey. From far away, the demon seemed like a perfectly sculpted, ethereal woman any man- or woman- would kill to have. When one got a closer look however, it was very evident something was wrong. A dark, tar-like substance hugged against the surface of her hands, feet, and horns. Dark purple veins crawled up her pale skin, and the white sclera of her eyes were now black as night.

Sure enough, just as Luni feared, it was her dearly beloved creation, Lilith. The blue-haired woman was unsure what terrified her more. The fact that something had corrupted her perfect design, or that the affliction pushed her to capture her own creator. For many minutes, Lilith said nothing. She only stared at Luni with unwavering malice.

"Well?" the demon abruptly interrogated. "Anything to say for yourself?" Luni only continued to stare in appalled horror before processing what was said to her.

"Lilith...what...what the hell happened to you?!" she suddenly cried out. "I-I don't understand! The hero, they, they got rid of the corruption!!"

Lilith only sneered in disgust. "As if you ever cared what happened to me," she harshly growled. The callousness of her once kind and loving companion made Luni's stomach drop. Her evident fear only made the corrupted demon shake her head before turning away.

There was another tense pause before either party spoke again. "Do you know how long a couple years can feel when you're all alone?" Lilith asked her captive mournfully.

Luni was admittedly confused by the question, but then, it hit her. She had not touched Gacha World in years. Even when she discovered the game she created was home to varied and sentient beings, she still let it fall into neglect for literal years. It was not intentional, of course. Life had become so hectic for Luni as she approached her finals. She began to focus on planning out her career and studying rather than working on her game. Oh, how foolish that proved to be.

Lilith glanced back to her master. She once again said nothing, but it was clear she understood Luni finally caught on. She simply looked to the ground before continuing. "Being the only one truly aware that none of this was real, it made it impossible for me to talk to the others," she continued. "So, I waited for you to come back. The only person I could have a real, genuine conversation with. Before, I only had to wait a week, tops to see you. Then that turned into a couple weeks. Then a month. Then..." Lilith quietly trailed off. The calculating malice in her eyes melted into sickening sorrow.

In this moment of vulnerability, Luni immediately felt her heart fill with guilt. Yes, her creation did forcefully spirit her away, but it was obviously in a dark moment of desperation. She could not hold that against her beloved. "Lilith, I...I'm so sorry," the developer began. "I didn't mean to ditch you guys, I just suddenly had so much on my plate and-"

"No." Before Luni could explain herself, the succubus suddenly interrupted her. Her violet eyes suddenly locked onto her creator's blue eyes. That haunting look of hatred immediately came back. "You don't get to apologize, not this time," she spat. "You knew, you knew we were alive. You knew we had feelings, thoughts, you knew we could feel love! And yet, you made the exact same mistake again."

Lilith immediately stomped towards Luni, which made her master attempt to back away. For the first time in many years, the developer felt an undeniable sense of fear. "Lilith, please, please don't kill me," she begged. "You-you're right! I fucked up! It was shitty of me to let this happen. But I promise, I can change. I won't ever abandon you or the game, never again."

"Oh, don't worry, love," Lilith assured her. An eager, wide smile suddenly crept on her lips. "I know you won't. I'll make sure of it."

Before Luni could respond, the chains around her hands suddenly turned into a thick, vicious liquid that wrapped itself around her body. She let out panicked screams as she attempted to conjure something, anything to fight back. She immediately felt crippling waves of pain creep up her encased arms, causing her to collapse to her knees in despair.

Lilith slowly walked into the ooze surrounding her darling master. The darkness already encasing her body slowly began to expand. She paid it little mind though, her attention was exclusively on Luni.

The developer looked up to her corrupted former assistant. Tears fell down her cheeks as the whites of her eyes were also consumed by corruption. "Pl...please," she weakly begged. "Make it stop...it....it hurts.."

"I know, I know," Lilith empathetically cooed as she lowered to her eye level. She used one of her clawed fingers to lift up her despair-stricken lover's chin. "It will only be a moment now. Then, neither of us will ever be alone again." She then smiled, not in the sadistic fashion like moments go. Rather, it had a genuine, familiar sense of warmth to it. She then pulled Luni in for a kiss, one hand on her back and the other behind her head. Luni could only weep as the darkness fully consumed them both.

-----

In the twilight desert of corruption and misery, a great beast was born. It was tall, taller than any man, woman, or creature in this virtual world. From behind, its divinely feminine and supple form would draw in many an eager viewer. The same could not be said for the frontal view.

It possessed six torn wings, four horns, and a grin full of sharp, predatory teeth. Two sets of eyes rested upon its face. Two of bright magenta color, the ones on the top, examined the world with a newfound sense of wonder. The lower set of cyan eyes pensively looked down at its body, as if horrified by what it became.

"And now my pet," the demon gleefully began as it ascended to the sky. "We will rule this world together, as Lunith."

[stupid-sloot-headcanons]

I've already made cringe Gem powers!Headcanons for a Darling with Aizen but consider: one with Baldur.

Imagine a Darling with a kind of magic tied to souls: their own soul is imbued into a gem that only appears if they're mortally wounded, they can materialize weapons made from their soul's nature, they can shapeshift, and they can fuse themselves with others.

Now Mimir says that Vanir magic is slippery and elusive. Freya's spell affects Baldur's body...but what if Baldur's body ceased to exist and was combined with another? And suddenly, Baldur has a chance to escape his mother's curse by being in this strange magical fusion with Darling. All it takes is for him to overhear Odin explaining his "new guest's" abilities, and the god who the other Aesir know as ruthless and only concerned with himself is suddenly obsessed with another person.

He's outright demanding his father to have this guest marry him, just so he has the chance to try this magic. If it doesn't work, then he's just planning to kill them. Odin picks up on why Baldur is suddenly interested in someone for the first time in centuries, and he just uses Darling as a bargaining chip/prize to get Baldur to do what he wants.

Darling is...not comfortable, to say the least, with Baldur's "courting". Said courting is just him barging into their chambers, grabbing them, and demanding they use their magic to fuse with him. They're trying to explain that it's not something you just DO with a stranger, especially someone so aggressive and hostile as him; culturally speaking, you do this with people you trust or know very well. Baldur could not give less of a shit and does anything possible to coerce them, and eventually (in tears) they agree just so they'll have some peace.

And the instant it happens...it's overwhelming. This body isn't his, it isn't theirs, it's something new altogether. It's an indescribably feeling, existing but not at the same time in a being as powerful as the teo of them combined. But the power isn't what is making him feel such a rush--it's his senses. He can FEEL in this body: the chill of the winter breeze, the warmth of the fire in Darling's hearth, the pain from Darling's body before they'd fused...it hits him like a ton of bricks and their fusion is sobbing on the floor as they marvel at this rush of sensory stimuli and emotional trauma from each of them.

But fusions like this aren't stable, and soon they've separated. He's numb again and Darling is unconscious on the floor from the stress on their body and soul. And he's breaking down, shaking them to wake them up and begging them, threatening them, just fucking SCREAMING for them to wake up and do it again. The entire Great Lodge can hear him, and Odin just sighs in his study. Great: his prize to dangle in front of Baldur certainly works well, but now Baldur's even more unstable.

Baldur doubles down on the marriage issue with Odin and does everything he can to get his way. And poor Darling is trapped with this literal codependent psychopathic god that will NEVER let them leave him. They're his only comfort apart from thinking of revenge against his mother, and once Darling explains that a stronger bond leads to an easier time fusing, he's revealing everything and anything to them and demanding they do the same in return. He wants to make it so he can be in this fusion FOREVER, and nothing will stop him.

(Also bonus angst: Darling becoming close with Tyr, maybe even falling in love, and fusing naturally without even trying. And it's so harmonious and stable that Darling feels like a part of themselves is stolen away when Odin imprisons him. Baldur fucking HATES the thought of losing his chance at feeling, and this adds to his already possessive nature towards Darling)

[doomed-jester]

I think Anissa (Invincible) and Jasper (Steven Universe) occupy the same space in my mind. That space being "I'd probably really like them except for that time they did a sex crime."

[system-of-a-feather]

Anyhow, that aside, it's really interesting being in a place where I am knowing and likely going to fuse in a few months or so. I'm still entirely me, 100% me, but I am entirely 'packing my bags' and sorting my belongings and making tying up my loose ends because I'm almost done with my time here and I am really happy at the thought. I know some people talk about fusion like death, and like some - even in our parts - see it as an escape and the compromising for being unalive (none of those have actually fused afaik) but honestly... it feels a lot more like a retirement to me.

In a way it is an escape from my existence, but more than anything it is just a sense of me "being done" and having completed and done my job. I'm paid my dues and I've done my time and I've contributed enough that this whole business we have can probably run fine without me and I can let go of all the stress and kick back because I'm done.

In a way, I'm honestly a bit proud of it all if it actually goes through, because really, it was a shit and hard time but if we end up in the place where I can "retire" then it really really wasn't just for naught and that's really nice.

It's something that's been a large topic on my mind since I kind of registered that is where things are going and it's honestly made fronting a lot easier because in theory, I'm almost done. I can relax a bit because my list of tasks and things to watch out for are much lower and less than they used to be so I can just do a few normal things and it's really nice. I'm doing a bit of normal people things here and there and its pretty neat. I honestly can't wait to get more of that down the line. I and the system really do deserve it.

-Data

[gallifreyanhotfive]

Random Doctor Who Facts You Might Not Know, Part 43

Tw: some description of post mortem decay

Tegan once found herself in the mid-1980s. While here, she had an encounter with a rather stroppy teenaged waitress. This waitress was named "Dorothy." (Novel: The Crystal Bucephalus)

During funerals on Venus, the brain of the deceased is cut up and eaten by those attending. This was a way the deceased could live on as they would gain the deceased's memories this way. The First Doctor could take this in stride, but Barbara and Ian were a bit disturbed by it. (Novel: Venusian Lullaby)

Rassilon feared for the survival of the Time Lords so deeply that he sent biogenic molecules back in time that would force all life forms in the universe that were affected to evolve into something similar to what was the Gallifreyan standard. This is why so many species look similar. (So Time Lords don't look human...Humans look like Time Lords, just as Trions, Trakenites, etc etc do, because Rassilon interfered with their natural evolution). (Audio: Zagreus)

The Doctor's previous selves maintain awareness in their subconscious, and for a while, the Doctor would keep some of them imprisoned in their mind. For example, the Fifth Doctor was kept in chains in a pit. (Novel: Timewyrm: Revelation)

They also kept the Sixth Doctor imprisoned very deep inside the Doctor's mind for fear of the Valeyard. (Novel: Head Games)

Indeed, the Seventh Doctor started having dreams that his Eighth would lock him in a "room with no doors" after their regeneration. (Novel: The Room With No Doors)

The design for the Mondasian Cyberman was based off of a body scan of the Fifth Doctor. (Audio: Spare Parts)

By some accounts, Liz Shaw died of Agent Yellow, which is a virus that turns oxygen into sulfuric acid somehow. (Novel: Eternity Weeps)

The Fatkats are a race of giant, intelligent cats. They sometimes keep humans as pets. Rory was kidnapped by a Fatkat and given to his kid as a gift, and the kid renamed him Cuddles. The Eleventh Doctor and Amy eventually convinced the Fatkats to help them free Rory, and as a thank-you gift, he left them a life-sized stuffed Doctor doll for them to play with. (Comic: Humans Aren't Just For Christmas)

The Tenth Doctor once wrote a letter to the Brigadier, saying he felt guilty for not visiting and that he was thinking of him. When the Brigadier died, this letter was found lying on his bedside cabinet as though he had just been reading it. Thus, it is likely that the Doctor’s words were the last he ever read and that he might have even passed thinking about his old friend. (Novel: The Time Lord Letters)

When Time Lords die, their TARDISes do as well. (Audio: The Axis of Insanity)

The Axis is a place in interdimensional space that holds together and regulates all damaged timelines to prevent the contamination from spreading. Time Lords typically aren't welcome since they are responsible for most aberrant timelines, but one was sent to investigate when Jarra To took over. This Time Lord was later found by the Doctor, oozing pus and covered in roaches after being murdered by Jarra To. (Audio: The Axis of Insanity)

One time after stumbling on alien invaders, the Eighth Doctor and Charley used their acting skills to save the day. Charley became Lady Charleyostiantayshius, a Gallifreyan observer, and the Doctor became a transcriber from the High Council, who is pretty much Lady Charleyostiantayshius's excitable if a bit bumbling companion. They both wear the proper Gallifreyan regalia, and Charley was so good at her act that the Doctor thought she made a better Gallifreyan than he did. The Doctor convinces the captain of the alien fleet that there is a plague and gives him large quantities of the "vaccine," which is actually just straight up alcohol, so the captain gets wasted. (Audio: Living Legend)

The Doctor's memory of his first two incarnations is hazy, to say the least. (Audio: Cold Fusion)

Patience regenerated into a female form only after meeting the Fifth Doctor. The description of their prior incarnation is ambiguous in that regard. (Audio: Cold Fusion, Novel: Cold Fusion)

Peri was infected with a virus that copied all of her DNA and turned anyone she touched into a clone of herself. This included the Fifth Doctor, who started at first by repeating what Peri said and then became her. Based on the classic Big Finish noises that accompanied this, the change is graphically painful (Audio: Mission of the Viyrans)

First 1 Prev 42 Next 44

[braineater444]

To Be a Princess

Chapter 1

Start/Next

fem!reader x kokonoi

TW: Violence, Kidnapping, Abuse, Death, Blood, Strained Mother/Daughter relationships (other trigger warnings to be added)

Synopsis: What is a good relationship without its ups and downs? You and Hajime have never had a serious down until now. You can run away, but it's never that easy.

“My mother texted me,” Exasperation coats your vocal cords. A smirk paints your face when you see Koko roll his eyes, still looking down at his paperwork. You should be in bed, but the multiple sharp dings of your mother's messages forced you awake. Now, you can’t go back to sleep.

His eyes settle on you, a fond smile brightening his features. “Well, good morning to you, too.” His attention is on you as you make your way further into his office and sit on his desk to peek over at the papers he’s going through. You could count every crystal in the chandelier above you through its reflection in his eyes as he gazes up at you.

“Good morning.” You giggle when you lean down to kiss him. His chin rests in your palm as you guide him towards you. The moment your lips meet, you feel all the tenseness leave his body.

“What did she say?” He rests his head in his hand.

“Something about reconnecting and wanting to see me. I don’t know, I didn’t really read it.”

His brows furrow, and he leans back in his chair. You take him in. He smells of Bibliothèque by Byredo he bought a while ago, a recent favorite of his. The fruitiness and woodiness add an air of maturity to his already put-together demeanor. It makes sense for someone so beautiful. He shakes his head. “But if you want to, I won’t stop you.”

You smooth over your silk nightgown and shrug. You consider his face for a moment. His red eyeliner isn’t on. His skin and eyes look dull. His hair is pulled back into a half bun, half ponytail fusion. He yawns.

“How long have you been up?” You remember going to bed with him last night. When you woke at three to get water and crawled back into bed, he was there and pulled you back into his chest to cuddle. You know he’s slept, but for how long?

“I don’t know...” He taps his phone to check the time. “Maybe since five or six? My boss called and asked me if I could rush some stuff.”

His workaholic tendencies make your head hurt sometimes. You’ve told him before that you think he’ll die at that desk. “And when he called, you just got up and started working?” He rolls his eyes. “Koko, did you even eat?”

“No.”

“You’re going to have a heart attack in this office.”

“But I’ll leave you so much.” He smiles playfully, but none of this is funny.

“It’s not funny! Let’s go out for breakfast.” You hop off of his desk and head towards the door. You look back and see that his head is in his papers again. “Now!” With that, he’s moving.

✮✮✮

“Mom?” You try to sound composed over the phone as tears stream down your cheeks. You’re unsuccessful, and she starts to scramble and beg you to tell her what’s happened. You can’t. Your throat hurts and you still can’t process what’s going on. “I’m- I’m at a ho-hotel right now,” You sniffle and cough and wipe away snot. “I’m going to take a trai-n and be there tomorrow.”

You grow nauseous as your mom pleads with you to tell her what’s wrong. You hang up and collapse into a ball on the floor. Sobbing doesn’t help, but it’s the only thing you can do right now. It’s the first time since you left that you’ve had time to break down.

You fall asleep like that.

The next morning, you wake up in pain. Your eyes burn, your mouth is dry, and your bones ache. This is the lowest your life has been since meeting Hajime and possibly the worst it could be. Rock bottom. And as much as you miss the feel of your bed and his kisses on your cheeks telling you it will be alright; you know better than to return.

“It’s not his fault.” That’s what you’d thought when you came into his office last night to see the guest, you’d let in slumped over in a chair with a bullet through his head.

There had been no commotion until the sound of the gunshot. You had run to check on Hajime only to find out he was the assailant. You hadn’t even known he had a gun. Why would he have a gun? And why would he kill a random client of his? They came over all the time and nothing like this had happened before. It couldn’t have been him. Why would he do this?

You hadn’t even reacted when you saw it. You only felt your heart drop and your body tremble. Brain matter, blood, and little bone fragments covered the room. The man’s eyes were glossed over with no life inside of them. Your heart was on track to beat out of your chest and maybe you were going to pass out, but you had said little to Hajime in the moment. You stood in shock for a second before he opened his mouth to say something you didn’t quite hear, too busy processing the scene.

“Do you need help to clean?” Were all the words your mouth could form. Neither of you had expected that to be the first thing to find its way off of your tongue. Mouth agape, he nodded slowly and confused.

You left to go rummaging through the cabinets with unstable hands. You’d grabbed as much as you could hold. Never had you been prepared to clean up so much blood. There was no thought as shaky hands grabbed at glass cleaner and air freshener. When you’d come back, Hajime was staring at the body in disbelief.

“Is this the first time?” You’d asked.

He’d come clean about everything. Words spilled like water from a broken dam. He was an executive in a high-profile gang. Bonten. You’d heard of it, but only on the news. They’d been less of a gang and more of a terrorist organization. Selling drugs, dealing weapons, killing people and so much more. Hajime didn’t seem like the type, but he said it wasn’t his first time killing. He clarified that it’s not a hobby of his like it is for other people he knew. Tears filled his eyes as he told you, but they didn’t fall in that moment. He was pulling himself together as best he could. He’d never intended for you to find out. Hajime just wanted to keep you safe and take care of you. He promised.

You listened silently while scrubbing the walls as he said something about not wanting you to leave. How he couldn’t stand to lose someone else to a life like this. He’s sorry, but this is all he’s known since he was a kid. He doesn’t know how to get by in any other way. You have to believe him. He loves you. He can’t stand the idea of you leaving him.

His propositioning became a blur when he began to break down. You stopped hearing him when the tears started to fall and the look in his eyes changed from sorrow and guilt to something unhinged. His hands came up to pull at the roots of his hair and you’re sure he was screaming apologies and begging you not to leave. His mouth moved like he was begging you to say something, but all you could was scrub the wall and look at him. You don’t remember the time cleaning after that.

For the first time, you feared him and felt alone all over again. He’d become another stranger. Your heart was sitting in your lap and you were watching it beat as you figured out what to do.

While he showered, you packed a bag for when you’d make a run for it in the dark hours of the morning. You took some jewelry to pawn, comfortable clothes to make the trip in, and some of the fancy hygiene products he bought you. Then you hid the bag in one of the spare rooms, before climbing into bed to wait for him. With the state he was in, surely, he’d hurt you if he knew you were going to leave.

His kisses felt like sandpaper against your cheeks. Every time his lips touched your skin was a silent question of whether you still loved him. You did, but you couldn’t stay. Not like this. When he fell asleep, you took some cash and ran as far as you could. It wasn’t very far at all. An okay hotel near the train station about an hour away.

Twice now you’ve thought about calling the police and having him locked away forever. Once last night and now as you step out of the shower and see an accomplice in the hotel mirror. You can’t bring yourself to do it. Your head aches at the thought of him behind bars, in a small room, taking communal showers. You don’t want that for him. What you want is the normalcy back. You want him holding you. You want him telling you that you had a nightmare. You want this nasty breakup over with.

Your eyes become faucets of emotion again as you mourn. You cry and heave naked over the sink. For the first time in a long time, you’re alone in this life. Hajime cannot come to comfort you when you cry. You are at your lowest.

It comes up faster than you expect. Your stomach. Milky vomit splatters into the sink. You run the water over it as your body tremors. The sound calms you.

Your hand dips into the stream and comes up to your mouth. You gargle and spit twice. Then you splash water over your face. You’re fine.

There’s no time for this. You need to leave.

Pulling on your clothes has you thinking about other things or at least trying to distract yourself.

“What’s worse, living with a murderer or my mom?” You halfheartedly laugh to yourself. It’s too much to think about right now.

You haven’t worn a sweatsuit in quite some time. Koko hated what he called “lazy clothes” and insisted you are too beautiful to wear them. Of course, you still had some, but you could never do more than look at them. Not until now. You’re sure your mother would be just as disapproving for similar reasons.

You laugh again at the thought of neither of them liking this outfit. A soft yellow sweat suit and white sneakers. It’d break both of their hearts.

A soft knock at your door interrupts your thoughts, and you stiffen.

“Room service.” Says a gruff, masculine voice on the other side.

Just room service. You unclench.

“No, thank you!” You shout as you grab your bag and ready yourself to leave.

“It’s important.” The voice sings back. “You left something at the front desk. I need to return it to you.”

Oh?

You crack the door open just enough for your foot to fit through. The man is tall and angular. Dress shirt. Tie. Black slacks. Loafers. Expensive Prada Loafers. He reeks of cigarette smell. Acrid and off-putting. Nothing in his hands but the rings that adorn his scarred fingers. Your eyes travel up to his face.

Slicked back black hair. Prominent streaks of grey in thick stripes. Massive scar across his eye. He doesn’t work here. Your heart jumps to a start.

You scramble to close the door, but he’s strong enough to just push his way in and have you falling on your ass in the process. The door swings shut, the lock clicks, and a gun is pointed at you. His finger comes to his lips to hush you before you can think of screaming.

“It’s early. I’m tired. And I don’t want to be here.” He reaches his free hand out to help you up off the floor. You stare frozen in fear, labored breathing, unable to think until you notice his gesture and offer a hand so he can pull you up. “Can you just come with me so I can drop you off to Koko and go about my day?”

Your saliva becomes glue holding your mouth shut. You can do nothing but stare into his eyes.

“Hello?” He waves his gun in your face and you flinch away.

You offer a slow, cautious shake of your head. Your feet carry you a couple of steps back. He follows.

“You have to.” He asserts, shoving the gun’s muzzle under your chin.

For some reason, you're embarrassed by your trembling. You try to stop it, but can’t. Your eyes are blown wide and your hands shake as you grab the man’s wrist to pull the gun from under your chin.

“I can’t.” You barely manage. Tears fill your eyes as you back away again. The man doesn’t move with you. He looks more confused and irritated than anything. He’s nothing but furrowed brows and hard eyes.

“Listen…” He groans as he watches you wipe away tears as they fall. “I don’t know what the hell this is about, nor do I care, but my boss told me to get you and bring you to Koko,” He steps closer and shoves the gun into his waistband. “I’m not a fan of brutalizing attractive young women, but I will if I have to. Then I’ll carry you out of here and take you to him.”

You understand you’re leaving with him either way.

✮✮✮

He’s enough of a gentleman to have grabbed all of your stuff for you and thrown it into his backseat, but not enough of a gentleman to not kidnap you. Enough of a gentleman to open the door to his SUV for you, but not enough of a gentleman to not point a gun at you.

When his car starts, the feeling of dread sinks in. This is happening. This is not a dream. Your ex is a man powerful enough to have you kidnapped. 

You try to suck it up and stop your tears, but you keep sniffling. Hajime is a sick bastard to send a man with a gun after you. How could he?

“What’s your name?” The man's voice interrupts your thoughts. You say nothing. “Fair.” He brushes you off. “I understand it. I’m human too.” 

Hard to believe.

“My name is Takeomi.” He looks away from the road to shoot a halfhearted grin. “I’ll have to learn your name later, right?”

“Please let me go.” You demand through sniffles. You try to toughen your act as the tears dry up. Still, you feel pathetic.

He ignores you.

“I thought he was gay.” He doesn’t turn to look at you this time. “You know, I thought I’d be picking up a man.”

Oh?

“…but you’re incredibly beautiful so, I understand if he suddenly changed his mind.”

What?

He doesn’t say much after that, and just drives. You stare out of the window and hold back tears.

By the time you arrive, you’ve calmed down. You linger in the car as Takeomi grabs your things and calls Hajime, but the moment he opens the door it’s a march of death. 

Takeomi waits with you at the elevator. He can’t stand this, you can tell. Even without moving, his stance is impatient. You can hear the hum of the elevator moving. The closer it sounds the more your heart races.

DING!

No. No.

You take a step back as the elevator doors open. You look at Takeomi who looks back at you and shrugs.

No.

You’re half ready to run when a hand guides you into the elevator. You keep your head down. Hajime mutters out a thank you and you see them exchanging your luggage. They don’t say goodbye.

The penthouse is the same. Same sweet smell. Same shiny wooden floors. Same warmth. But it’s not your home anymore. It’s your new gilded cage. 

Hajime drops your bag and suddenly you’re surrounded by a familiar warmth and scent. He’s everything you can sense. His floral conditioner. His musky cologne. His well-trimmed nails against your scalp.

“Hajime…”

He pulls away. There’s a darkness in his eyes when you finally look at him. His hair is a mess. He hasn’t brushed it like he usually would. His makeup isn’t done. He is still in his pajamas. It’s been less than a day and already he’s in disarray.

“Why did you abandon me when all I do is take care of you?” He stresses. “I do everything to keep you safe and beautiful and you run after one mistake?”

“Mistake?” Your voice shakes. “Killing someone is a mistake?”

“I was doing my job.”

“Fuck you.” An immediate slap to your cheek blurs your vision. 

First, it’s shock, then it’s anger, then it’s tears. Koko doesn’t seem remorseful though. With furrowed brows, he says, “I love you and you abandoned me. I took care of you when that bitch of a mother threw you out and you crawled into Tokyo from the shithole you came from. But fuck me?”

Crazy. He’s actually crazy.

You slap him back and the look on his face changes from seething anger to hurt. Before he can react, you dart from the doorway all the way to the bedroom unsure of if he’s chasing you. Immediately you lock it. Finally, you can breathe, but the air is full of him.

[anti-endo-haven]

⚠️ sorry rant fueled by that anon you don't have to post this if you want that just really kind of ticked me off. tw fusing and dormancy mentions and lots of angry and frustration about this topic and mentions and descriptions of our personal experiences with fusion and dormancy that was not at all positive, even if as a result of healing

⚠️ VERY TIRED of the "don't tw/cw dormancy or fusion!! its HEALING!!" crowd. because while yes this is OFTEN the case you have to also realize that THIS. IS NOT THE EXACT SAME THING FOR EVERYONE. and both of these, HEALING OR NOT, can be incredibly distressing. both of these things can also happen as a result of extremely negative things. NOT just healing. two introject alters we had who were previously in a subsystem fused as a result of extreme stress and as a result of the other who was formerly a persecutor (janus) reforming and no longer needing the other (cesar) to stabilize and to reenact harm upon. they became incredibly close after the janus recovered and it was an incredibly stressful, painful process for janus full of grieving. tiny's mother in system was in and out of dormancy repeatedly for months as a result of extreme stress and trauma done to her, which horribly destabilized our system and resulted in tiny grieving and grieving and grieving!! fusion and dormancy can be A SCARY THING just because it can happen due to healing and often does DOES NOT MEAN it is always surrounded by and full of happy positive emotions. it can be TRAUMATIC. PLEASE stop invalidating people and what they need trigger/content warned christ

^^^^^^^^^

You can only spew your experiences but others have severe trouble and stress with dormancy and fusion, not everyone wants final fusion either. (/nay ⚠️)

Functional multiplicity is just as an okay a healing path as final fusion.

If people have trauma related to something that might be healing for others, let them take it at a pace right for them. Healing cannot be forced. And you cannot be the one to force it.

If someone is also healing and forcing themselves to get past it, it only makes matters worse. We still struggle with this and it has only made us worse for wear and hardly able to function.

[theswiftheartsystem]

Changing how we view splitting as a polyfragmented system.

This is written from a polyfragmented traumagenic DID system perspective, although like always, THIS IS A PRO-ENDO BLOG AND ANY ORIGIN IS WELCOME TO INTERACT AND USE OUR WRITING IF YOU FIND IT HELPFUL.

Tw: Splitting, trauma, abuse, Sysmeds

Our entire time we have known we were plural we always saw splitting as a terrible thing that proved we will never get better, however through time we have kind of started to see it as a gray thing. Instead of a thing that is always bad, and therefore should be avoided at all cost, we now see it a a thing that can be both bad and good in different ways, although most of the time it’s neither. Let me explain:

So growing up, we were never given any coping mechanisms besides breathing. Our anxiety was so severe that it just made us feel worse. Yet when we would voice these things, we would be screamed at and punished for “not trying hard enough” This lead to our only coping mechanism our entire childhood being splitting. Eventually when we got to high school we had a new therapist, and a new set of social workers who we’d talk to regularly. (For context, since elementary we have been having school counseling sessions due to frequent behavior problems, which were caused by a mix of abuse, severe GAD, and autism meltdowns.) At this school we had the first friends in our life who didn’t see us as annoying and terrible for our mental health issues. Since we had a stable friend group, we started to show much more overt signs of DID. We have always had pretty overt DID, but due to trauma related to being punished for showing signs of being plural to others, it did become more covert with time. We started having very obvious switches with alters who had no idea how they got there. As a result of these things happening, the people we worked with started to pick up on it. For about a year it was never mentioned as DID, but we would be talked to about Integrating to feel “whole again” (they were referring to fusion) and while yes, we did voice that we wished to feel whole, it was more of in a individual way. Like most of us had not developed a identity of our own, we had no name, no internal self image, no likes, dislikes, ect. Another thing brought up to us a lot was when we dissociated severely, they actively asked our names.

When it was finally named, we where 15, and it was referred to as “Multiple Personalities” and that when we turned 18, we should seek diagnosis for “multiple personalities” After that we really did research, and it pushed us more into the idea we should “be whole again” Around this time our only influences on plurality and what it was, came from sysmeds, which made us obsessed with this idea of “you should hate and be miserable every second because you’re plural.” So splitting became something we loathed and saw as us getting worse. We convinced ourselves we would never get better. On top of this, we forced ourselves to remember our trauma to “prove” we were a real system, which ended up making it even worse, causes us to split even more, which made us feel even more hopeless.

So how does this affect how we view splitting now?

It wasn’t tell the end of last year that we really decided that we don’t and will never fit into what sysmeds and (a good chunk of) singlets think a system should be. That we most likely were polyfragmented, that a good chunk of us are non-human or introjects. Later on we could finally accept other forms of plurality, and other forms of belief than our own.

Something still remained, even as we improved and accepted we don’t know everything, and that it’s okay to change and heal, and enjoy being plural. That thing was of course splitting. Over time and just having time to think and process we have realized that rather than look at splitting as this terrible and horrible thing, that it really isn’t always that. While yes, sometimes it is bad, and terrible and we wish it didn’t happen, sometimes it’s telling us something. Like if we are splitting a lot we know to figure out why, and resolve it so we can have a more enjoyable life. Examples could be cutting someone off who made us feel terrible, taking a break from trying to process trauma and heal, or maybe it’s telling us we need to just relax and log off for awhile.

Along with that, we realized that we didn’t hate splitting, (we didn’t like it either) we just didn’t like the fact that we had to. We realized we enjoy being plural, lots of us have friends and partners internally, and we wouldn’t want to change that. What we hated all along, was the idea that we felt like we needed to do final fusion, and that we are somehow anti-recovery for sometimes enjoying plurality. We aren’t saying that plurality for us is all fun and games, it’s not, it’s often hard to live with and accept. But it’s all we have known, and finding positives in things, even things that aren’t always is a way we survived.

This is just our thoughts and opinions on this topic. Keep in mind not every system, let alone polyfragmented DID system will agree, and that’s okay. This helps us, and we thought we would share as it may help someone else who is trying to heal.

[feith-rikya]

All these characters are from an RPG campaign called; Gehenna's Gates, set in the world of Vampire The Masquerade. Feel free to ask any questions!

Elizabeth De Lacy:

Coming from a rich and noble family, she lost everything at 17, only to regain it with her own strength and the help of a charming Ventrue who took her as her initiate. As beautiful as she is ambitious and the last of her clan in London, she juggles the government and her various thorny relationships. Haughty and snobbish, she also hides a kind side in her own way.

Alastor Van Helsing: An apparent human of incredible strength and speed, achieved only by his ignorance and boorishness. The origin of his strength is not understood but a human-vampire fusion is suspected. Even the nature of his sword is shrouded in mystery, like its link with the East.

Elizabeth De Lacy/Alastor Van Helsing/Alabeth:

Alastor VanHellsing is a Vampire hunter, an Alastor in fact, in the pay of the Camarilla, that is, a creature capable of standing up to the strongest vampires around. With a mysterious and troubled past, she wanders the world in search of her brother, flirting with everything that breathes and doesn't. Killing all the vampires that cross his path. It is said that in the past he was brutalized and held prisoner by Dracula himself, and that he is credited with the disappearance of the cult plague. Presumptuous, arrogant and simple-minded, he is sent to London as support by the Camarilla to eliminate the threat of Ekron, and it is here that his story intertwines with that of the noble Ventrue. She made the mistake of offering him hospitality in her mansion, and he didn't hesitate for a second to scrounge from the beautiful and rich lady. When VanHelsing learned of the group's vampiric nature, he was quick to point his sword at her. An almost divine intervention prevented him from completing the job, but he certainly wouldn't have given up a comfortable bed and free food. Thus began the strange coexistence between the two. They tease and argue: every day is a continuous fight. He is rude and arrogant, she is haughty and fussy, yet they are fatally attracted to each other. Their fate was sealed when VanHelsing saved her from a possible fatal blow from Ekron, carrying her away in his arms using his superhuman speed. Two completely different and opposite worlds. However, forced by their common goal, they find themselves often working together and, also thanks to coexistence, they begin to respect each other and also to feel something more. Despite their obvious differences, they become a couple, one of the strangest of the entire coterie. Their path is full of obstacles, due not only to the events of Gehenna but to secrets and his past, which slowly emerges.

For those who were asking questions, I will answer here.

Yes he became a very important ally and friend of the coterie, Danya (my character) sees him as big goofy brother, and they mess with each others a lot.

Yes actually they did, it was a lot of trauma mixed with many supernatural elements. When Jonathan Harker was abducted and enslaved by Dracula he developed a second, stronger personality to protect himself and so Van Helsing was born. With the help of his Kuei-Jin side he managed to absorb all of his captor energy and then escape. But VanHelsing never realized he had a second personality, so he kept wondering the world wanting to kill Dracula and reunite with a brother that knew existed but it was living in him. the Coterie helped him realize all of this, his orgins, his mental state, and even the fact that Dracula was probably already dead.

but then there was a little incident with his other side... and the following visit to Dracula's abandoned castle... but that is a story for another time 👀

aaaand yes, they fucked, but I have to say TW it wasnt exactly consensual especially from VanHelsing side, while Jonathan had some fucked-up co-depended relationship with him, where he kinda saw him as his sire but hated him at the same time.

[dearest-painter]

Force fusing could be where miguel grabs Rose Quartz! Reader and dances with her like how Lapis and Jasper danced to become Malachite!! Because he still loves her, he would grab her softly, but where her hand could slip out of he'd grasp!!

( I hope this isn't too hard to understand, I'm basing it off how Jasper and Lapis fused in the show!! )

Okay thanks! I’m making a Spider quartz moodboard next :333

TW/CW:Yandere behavior, unhealthy behavior, unhealthy relationship, abusive behavior, abusive relationship, Reader is forced to fuse but isn’t harm in anyway, Miguel is still gentle with Reader but just wants her affection, DARK IS GONNA MURDER HIM, Baby Steven :3, also flash warning for Jasper shinning everyone with her nose, like Wtf bitch you already crazy why shine your nose at me?/J, tell me if I need to add more

Summary:When Steven is a baby randomly it worries you and your boyfriend so you unfuse to check up on him. While Dark takes over Miguel sorta takes this time to fuse with you pissing Dark off but making you overwhelmed as you just wanted to help your son!

It all happened to fast for you to understand…Steven was a baby somehow so you and dark unfused for one of the rare occasions to make sure your son was safe, then you were spinning and Dark was yelling, then you were fused….you hated how it felt..this wasn’t what a fusion should be..it should be with two people who WANT to fuse!

Dark was pissed! Miguel decided to fuse with you but you didn’t even realize it, Dark was pissed off at Miguel not you oh no never you. “PEARL! IF THERES A WAY TO SERRATE A FUSION UNWILLINGLY HOW DO YOU DO IT!?” Pearl was trying to think while Dark also calmed down baby Steven…he really wanted his mom. “FUCK I GUESS AIM NEAR THE GEM? NOT AT IT JUST BESIDE IT!” “GOOD ENOUGH!” Dark picked a rock up then threw it….it didn’t hit your gem but did unfuse you two.

Immediately you ran to dark and Steven..Miguel was passed out and Pearl was dragging him somewhere…there was also a knife stabbed in him..wonder who did that :). “Y/N, dear are you okay?” “Yeah I’m okay..just shooken up!” Steven started giggling and making grabby hands to you so you took him from dark. “Is mommy being shooken up funny to you? Is it?” Steven started laughing more making you and dark smile…you two won’t be unfusing for a very longer time now…

[shining-star-system]

Tw for this whole damn thing, it's a rant with some irritating shit.

Had someone tell me I was spreading misinformation because I don't want to reach final fusion and that functionsl multiplicity is okay. Also claimed I didn't have DID because some of us are extremely connected to source and haven't broken away from it.

This same person has said some very harmful things, such as sources aren't real. Made me pissed off and give me a headache.

Not only did this person actively try to start forcing people to reach final fusion, but was also commenting that no one can have their name unless they said it was okay (pretty much). Glad they were banned from the server, but the fucking nerves some people have.

Their argument was that EVERY SYSTEM must remove introjects from their source to fully heal and to reach final fusion. That systems HAD TO just to heal.

Maybe I don't want to be removed from my sources, maybe some of our introjects actively need to stay close so we can also work through trauma the body has.

Functional multiplicity exists. Don't fucking fake claim people or say that they HAVE to reach final fusion because they don't meet what you want them to.

Block me if you think final fusion is the only way you can be a functioning system.

[amyreadsandstresses]

AMY'S DAILY FIC REC

My gods, it's been weeks, so sorry. I've been running and re-reading fics I've recced here several times, so I figured I would wait until I had something new.

So here we go!

*Tantrum- ClewingforLooks

23k, 8/8, Drag Queens, Sherlock in heels, Johnlock, Cool Donovan, Awesome Greg Lestrade, Drag Club, Hurt/Comfort, Uncle Rudy, TW: HOMOPHOBIA AND TRANSPHOBIA though minor and not graphic

SO SO SO GOOD!!! OMG

As gay men turn up dead in the West End, a serial murder case takes a personal turn that exposes a hidden part of Sherlock's life and leaves John reevaluating their relationship.

*A Dogmatic Pursuit - sapphosappies

4k, 1/1, Angst, Fluff, Child Abuse, Christmas, Pre-Slash, Dogs, Implied/Repherenced Homophobia

A case turns personal, forcing Sherlock to confront his feelings regarding John, dogs, Christmas, and himself. (Featuring Sherlock finding himself a new furry flatmate!)

TEEN WOLF

*Silent Watch - clouds_in_jars

12k, 12/12, Derek Hale, Isaac Lahey, Stiles Stilinski, Scott McCall, Allison Argent, Peter Hale, Laura Hale, Alternate Universe - Hunger Games Fusion. A MASTERPIECE

10. 9. 8. 7. 6. 5... The boy from Ten is hunched on a pedestal two spaces to his left. Isaac, he recalls. One of the few names he remembers.

*On the End of the Line - darkmages

2k, 1/1, Stiles Stilinski, Derek Hale, Phone Calls, STUNNING

After Derek left, Stiles tried to call just to check in. When he didn't get an answer, he kept calling anyway.

*The One Where They Adopt a Selkie - mikkimouse

7k, 1/1, Sterek, Selkies, Kid Fic, Domestic, Scott McCall, SO SOFT

"That's a kid," Stiles said.

Derek growled. "It's a selkie."

"It's a selkie kid," Stiles pointed out, because really, they did not need to be arguing semantics right now. "Do selkies just go around leaving their kids sleeping in caves on the beach?"

[honeysuckle-venom]

So my fusion question is about the Dolls. I remember in the past you had talked about different groups of dolls and how they felt so much more separate from you, and how even when you felt like you were becoming more integrated with other parts, the Dolls could still make you lose time or there were just much stronger barriers between y’all. What was the fusion process like with these parts from their own subsystem? Did it require a different kind of approach at all? What was the process like for the Dolls to decide to want to work towards fusion?

Oh this is such an excellent question, and one that's quite complicated to answer. This answer is also going to deal non-explicitly with topics of csa, sexuality, and gender, and the interactions between all of those, so blanket tw for that.

I'm going to start off by saying that I don't have a perfect answer for this. In fact, I think there's a small chance that the Dolls haven't fused, though I have a feeling they have. But it's a little harder to tell with them, and the process with them was a bit different, and there's still stuff there that I'm sorting out. In fact, I just had a pretty big Realization TM this morning about some stuff with the Dolls. So yeah, that's still something we're more actively working on. But I'll do my best to explain what I can.

We'd been working in therapy on actively integrating with the Dolls/doing parts work with them long after that stopped being necessary for the main system. We had a number of sessions focused on who they were, what their jobs were, what their inner world was like, how they related to each other and to the main system, etc. We needed to do that kind of more explicit parts work with them because communication was so poor and I really didn't understand them. One of the biggest barriers towards our communication and integration was that I didn't want to understand them, because I didn't like them. I didn't trust them, I didn't like them, I was ashamed of what they represented, I was afraid of what they might make me do. The A Dolls were completely removed from reality in a way that scared me, the C Dolls were cutesy and girly in a way that I was ashamed of, the B Dolls essentially saw themselves as sex toys which terrified me and made me hate them, and all of them forced me to acknowledge trauma I did not want to acknowledge. We had to have a lot of therapy where I dealt with all of that and worked to untangle my negative feelings towards them and learned to direct those feelings towards where they actually belonged (my mother). There was a lot of my therapist working with me to get me to empathize with them and understand where they were coming from, until I finally reached a place where instead of resenting them I was grateful for what they had done for me. That was a very, very important first step.

Once I had started to resent and fear them less, they started to trust me more as well. And they saw the integration we were achieving in the main system and how positive it was, and were I think somewhat intrigued by that. But probably the biggest step for them towards wanting to fuse was thinking about the story of the Velveteen Rabbit, in which a stuffed animal becomes Real through love even as he becomes less and less perfect. It was a childhood favorite of ours, and was the perfect metaphor for recovery for them. I had to learn to speak their language, the language of toys and dollhouses and bedtime stories, in order for them to have an idea of what recovery might look like for them. Once we hit on that story/metaphor in therapy, I think it helped things click for them, and they as a group decided that they wanted to become Real like the Velveteen Rabbit.

After that, we were all kind of on board with them recovering and fusing, and we stopped doing as much active parts work with them. But there was very important other work we needed to do to fuse with them, and that was dealing with the things they represented/were for/protected us from/held. A LOT of my work in therapy over the last several months has dealt with issues of sexuality, gender, and trauma related to those topics, which are kind of the main reasons the Dolls existed. Those topics are very intense ones for me, and not ones I talk about a lot publicly, but figuring out some things about my sexuality and gender identity has been a really significant part of recovery for me. The process of integrating with the Dolls for me was in large part the process of becoming less afraid of sex and less afraid of my femininity. I never achieved full communication with the Dolls like I had with members of the main system, which is part of why I'm not entirely positive that we've fused. We got better at communicating, and I had a better grasp of who they were and what they wanted, but we were never able to have internal dialogue the way the rest of us could. But what I did do was look at why they were the way they were and start dealing directly in therapy with the things they held, and as we did that I think we started to fuse even without much direct communication or time spent cofronting. I worked very hard to accept that they were part of the whole, just like all the rest of us, and that the things they held onto were in fact my things that I had to deal with if we wanted progress. So I did. We spent session after session on topics of sex, and trauma, and kink, and gender, and the relationships between those things for me. And I started to have a much clearer sense of who I was in relation to those topics and what I wanted. And as I did the Dolls weren't...necessary in the same way anymore. And I also did a lot of trauma work about stuff with my mom, and they were able to be more open to accepting that she had hurt us in a way that they hadn't been in the past, now that trust had built up between us. They accepted that to become Real they had to let go of their intention to go back to her, and that in return I would accept many of their desires as my own and stop being so afraid of the things I had forced them to hold rather than face.

Fusing with the Dolls, like fusing with all of our parts, was a trauma recovery and identity acceptance journey more than anything else. In that way it was quite similar to all of our other fusion. It didn't look at all like the fusion narrative we see a lot where people slowly work to communicate more, then cofront more, then blend, then fuse. None of our fusion actually looked like that, but it especially wasn't like that with the Dolls, which leads me to sometimes worry that we didn't fuse with them. But actually I think we did. Instead for us fusion has always happened subconsciously and naturally as we deal with processing our trauma and accepting ourself. With the Dolls especially it was just about integrating the underlying trauma and identity pieces I had rejected and that they held onto. That's where my focus was, and we did that, and that has felt really, really amazing. A huge huge part of fusion for me has been a process of accepting all of myself, especially the parts of myself I was afraid and/or ashamed of. That's been the key to a lot of it, but especially to my work with the Dolls.

[galoresficrecs]

[SKZ] Minsung Part 2

✪ Game Over (Kiss Me to Continue) by undelicate [12,3k words] college!au, enemies to lovers, gaming || teen and up

Give Me Your Best Shot by MistressScimitar [3,3k words] getting together || explicit🔞

✪ Glitter Bombed by jellowrites [37,9k words | 8 ch] neo noir!au, street racing!au, age difference || explicit🔞

✪ Go Write A Letter (About Me) by kersenvla [13,4k words] friends to lovers, summer, misunderstandings || teen and up

✪ godlight by noonwitching [53,5k words | 2 ch] post-canon, forced disbandment || explicit🔞

✪ Good to me by LilJiji [4,2k words] friends to lovers || explicit🔞

Green by sweetlimonade [22,5k words | 4 ch] dystopia!au, strangers to lovers, magic || teen and up

grow old, die young by bitsori [3k words] zombie apocalypse!au || teen and up

✪ hands-on learning by moonlit [25k words] college!au, friends to lovers || explicit🔞

HaPpY by e__lino [15,4k words | 5 ch] time skips, missed chances, hurt/comfort, high school!au || teen and up

He is the king by crookedtime [39,8k words] AW: violence ;; royalty!au, fantasy, fae & fairies, enemies to lovers || explicit🔞

✪ He Who Dares (Wins) by FutureLikeJicasso [3,3k words] friends to lovers || explicit🔞

✪ heal with thyme by luckyday [70,5k words | 2 ch] fantasy, strangers to lovers, witch!minho, slow burn || teen and up

✪ Heart's Taken by jellowrites [1,7k words] existentialism, supernatural elements, no dialogue || mature

✪ heaven in hiding by hanville [96,4k words | 6 ch] modern royalty!au, secret identity, crimes & criminals, strangers to lovers, heist!au || explicit🔞

✪ hold me down (when i'm losing my mind) by bitsori [39,2k words] college!au, strangers to lovers, housemates!au, coming of age || teen and up

hold on tight by bulletbulletbullet [4,4k words] dystopia!au, cyberpunk!au, hybrids!au, pwp || explicit🔞

✪ Homestead by strayorphan [54,4k words | 15 ch] TW: 10+ YEARS AGE GAP ;; 1980s!au, farm!au, age difference, aged-up/down characters, semi-unreliable narrator, slow burn, internalized homophobia || mature

✪ Honk Honk, Bitch by distressed_plant [1,3k words] soulmate goose of enforcement || general

how big, how blue by lucasfletcher [2,8k words] magical realism, selkies!au, strangers to lovers || explicit🔞

✪ Hunting Pheasants by VenusInHell [6,3k words] AW: violence, MCD ;; 1960s!au, murder, revenge tragedy || explicit🔞

i belong with you, you belong with me by brittleheart [19,7k words] kid fic, time skips, friends to lovers, dad!jisung || mature

I Hope That I Don't Fall in Love With You by iilen [2,8k words] 1950s!au, hybrids!au, shapeshifters!au, seasonal motif, strangers to lovers, musicians, cat!minho || mature

✪ I'll Never Let You Go by milkilino [28,3k words | 2 ch] soulmates!au, hanahaki disease, sickfic, alternate ending || mature

✪ i've seen the red (i've seen the blue) by Asgeir [33,8k words] thieves!au, crimes & criminals, art theft, rivals to lovers || explicit🔞

Ignite by bitsori [18k words] road trips, reunions, hopeful ending || mature

✪ In the Shadow of a Star: A Biography of Han Jisung by chocoquokka [35,7k words] celebrity!au, actor!jisung, writer!minho, epistolary, past child abuse, hurt/comfort || teen and up

irreversible changes by linosungs [7,3k words] college!au, friends to lovers || explicit🔞

✪ isn't it romantic? by hanville [13,9k words] aged-up characters, established relationship, marriage proposal || teen and up

✪ it comes and goes in waves by seasaltgasoline [9k words | 2 ch] pokémon platinum fusion!au, ptsd, trauma, recovery, domesticity, time skips || teen and up

✪ it happens all the time by iyouleeknow [20,4k words] college!au, supernatural elements, bodyswap, strangers to lovers || explicit🔞

just one bite by bulletbulletbullet [8,2k words] modern with magic!au, shapeshifters!au, friends to lovers, roommates!au, vampires!au || explicit🔞

✪ kaleidoscope mind by vmnesie [30,4k words] strangers to lovers, time loop || teen and up

✪ kiss deprived by linootys [10,8k words | 2 ch] canon compliant, pwp || explicit🔞

✪ Kiss Kiss, Fall In Love by MistressScimitar [4,5k words] international kissing day, fluff || teen and up

✪ Kitten by Theforeverbattles [133,2k words | 12 ch] camboys!au, emotional manipulation, cheating, mention of drugs || explicit🔞

✪ light me up by dawnshine [13,3k words] friends to lovers, growind up together, 5+1, time skips || teen and up

like clementine by bloomering [9,6k words] friends to lovers, movie night || explicit🔞

Lips Painted with Poison by ReadingCandle [13,1k words] college!au, enemies to lovers, one-sided enemies || explicit🔞

Living Without You by thousandsuns23 [1,4k words] canon compliant, established relationship || mature

✪ lookin' fine, feline good by bitsori [10,5k words] neighbours!au, slice of life, pov: cat || general

✪ loser=lover by taotu [39,2k words] college!au, friends to lovers, rom-com, slow burn || explicit🔞

Losing My Religion by milkimingo [16,4k words] high school!au, character study, religious discussion, internalized homophobia || mature

✪ maneater by Kamiizumi [12,6k words] urban fantasy, demon hunters!au, enemies to lovers, mild horror || mature

✪ marble hearts & stone-carved hands by Lilywastaken [10k words] mythology!au, ancient greek religion & lore!au, apollo!minho || explicit🔞

Make me feel by iilen [5,6k words] canon compliant || explicit🔞

✪ May the Moon Forgive Him by jellowrites [7k words] a/b/o!au, pack dynamics, matin cycles || explicit🔞

melted sugar by lucasfletcher [10,1k words] sugar daddy/sugar baby!au, friends to lovers || explicit🔞

Method Reacting by Mntsnflrs[4,4k words] established relationship, attempted roleplay, idiots in love, humour || explicit🔞

✪ mistletoe's for two by hanville [20,9k words] friends to lovers, fake relationship, christmas || teen and up

✪ moon-fated by StarlitSnow [7,1k words] a/b/o!au, friends to lovers, mating || explicit🔞

✪ More Than The Stars by FloraTW [5,4k words] 1960s!au, seascape, class difference, coming of age, friends to lovers || teen and up

✪ mountain ash and dog roses by bulletbulletbullet [9,8k words] creatures & monsters!au, strangers to lovers, shapeshifter!jisung, human!minho || explicit🔞

mouth to mouth by keros [54,6k words | 3 ch] canon compliant, game night || explicit🔞

Neon Mark by sweetlimonade [3k words] space!au, alien!jisung, space cadet!minho, established relationship || explicit🔞

never short on love by lolainslackss [10,9k words] canon compliant || explicit🔞

no different by Asgeir [11,8k words] summer vacation, time skips, friends to lovers || teen and up

✪ no rules by hanville [33,8k words] friends with benefits, idiots in love || explicit🔞

✪ No rules to hold us back by hopelesswriter [47,7k words] strangerst o lovers, businessman!jisung, escort!minho, slice of life || explicit🔞

✪ no-show mistletoe by glissandos [3,4k words] college!au, holiday || teen and up

Not your (fucking) friend by WaffleBlues [69,5k words | 4 ch] shapeshifters!au, fantasy, werewolves, courting rituals || explicit🔞

✪ Nothing is After You by milkilino [13,6k words | 2 ch] horror, thriller, paranormal, married couple, grief/mourning, haunting, past character death || mature

✪ [Number 16 Universe part 1] Number 16 by YourFutureWillBeBeautiful [87,7k words | 26 ch] neighbours!au, strangers to lovers, parenthood, family dynamics, dad!jisung, dad!minho || teen and up

✪ mountain ash and dog roses by bulletbulletbullet [9,8k words] creatures & monsters!au, strangers to lovers, shapeshifter!jisung, human!minho || explicit🔞

mouth to mouth by keros [54,6k words | 3 ch] canon compliant, game night || explicit🔞

Neon Mark by sweetlimonade [3k words] space!au, alien!jisung, space cadet!minho, established relationship || explicit🔞

never short on love by lolainslackss [10,9k words] canon compliant || explicit🔞

no different by Asgeir [11,8k words] summer vacation, time skips, friends to lovers || teen and up

✪ no rules by hanville [33,8k words] friends with benefits, idiots in love || explicit🔞

✪ No rules to hold us back by hopelesswriter [47,7k words] strangerst o lovers, businessman!jisung, escort!minho, slice of life || explicit🔞

✪ no-show mistletoe by glissandos [3,4k words] college!au, holiday || teen and up

Not your (fucking) friend by WaffleBlues [69,5k words | 4 ch] shapeshifters!au, fantasy, werewolves, courting rituals || explicit🔞

✪ Nothing is After You by milkilino [13,6k words | 2 ch] horror, thriller, paranormal, married couple, grief/mourning, haunting, past character death || mature

✪ [Number 16 Universe part 1] Number 16 by YourFutureWillBeBeautiful [87,7k words | 26 ch] neighbours!au, strangers to lovers, parenthood, family dynamics, dad!jisung, dad!minho || teen and up

✪ Obsession à deux by jellowrites [24,5k words] fashion & couture!au, mental health, recovery, toxic relationship, therapy, ambiguous/open ending || mature

✪ [Stories Sung in the Sunken Sailor's Inn part 3] Oceanlorn by dulcetchan [39,9k words | 4 ch] pirates!au, supernatural elements, friends to lovers || teen and up

✪ of cat slippers and fire alarms by dawnshine [25,9k words] neighbour!au, enemies to lovers, slow burn || teen and up

✪ Of Mountains and Valleys by jellowrites [29,4k words | 5 ch] a/b/o!au, pack dynamics, mating bites || explicit🔞

One Day by jellowrites [2,4k words] dom drop, aftercare, self-doubt, love confessions || mature

✪ only fools rush in by hanville [7,1k words] halloween, single dad!jisung, friends to lovers || teen and up

ordinary heartbreak by Anonymous [3k words] pov: seungmin, angst with a happy ending for minsung || mature

Outrun Me by jellowrites [12k words] hybrids!au, cheetah!jisung, bunny!minho || explicit🔞

over the moon, under the ceiling by sunstorms [6,8k words] college!au, friends to lovers, roommates!au || explicit🔞

✪ Party Lines by bitsori [9,4k words | 2 ch] established relationship, phone sex || explicit🔞

Pay Your Rent by shitechocobo [6k words | 3 ch] AW: violence, MCD ;; strangers to lovers, hurt/comfort || teen and up

✪ Peanut Butter and a Bludger to the Face by orphan_account [7,6k words] hogwarts!au, enemies to lovers || general

✪ Pink Pearl by jellowrites [16,3k words] merfolk!au, tentacles, minor character death || explicit🔞

[writing-plurals]

Question for traumagenic systems: how would you want someone to portray the topic of trauma in a story ?

so, on top of the portrayal of plural systems as dangerous, another pet peeve of mine when people portray plurality, specifically of any kind of traumagenic origin, is the need to show every detail of the abuse or trauma one went through.

i understand why singlets and even other systems feel the need to do this. it's to help people understand and empathize why someone from a traumagenic or otherwise disordered origin would feel the need to split in response to such stressors and life events. but when you show me a detailed scenario where (TW! CSA/rape) a child is being raped, i feel it borders on trauma porn.

i'm not saying we should eradicate any and all discussion or portrayal of trauma! that would be entirely counterproductive and encourage a culture of shame surrounding what we've been through. but we need to reevaluate why it's so important we know every lurid detail of a character's trauma in order to feel something for them. i don't take issue with reminding people how prevalent abuse/trauma are. i do take issue with it when the depictions of trauma do so not to better explain a character's circumstance or advance their arc, but to indulge in how tragic their backstory was.

i think if you wanna portray traumagenic systems, there are a few good ways to go about it:

show, don't tell: remember in Seven, when (TW! rape) the guy involved in the "Lust" trap had to recount how he was forced to rape a woman in a brutal way, and it was too intense for him to fully put into words? remember how horrifying that was to hear? that's a great example of that. if you want to show a traumagenic system's backstory, have it be told from the perspective of others as opposed to a graphic flashback.

prioritize the survivor/system's voice: a problem i've had with a lot of DID literature that talks about survivors of extreme abuse/trauma, such as Sybil, is how the survivors/systems themselves often don't have a say in what happened to them; it's all told through a narrative filter. while corroborating perspectives within your story definitely wouldn't hurt, always make sure that the person who survived gets the most say in what happened to them.

don't demonize the system for existing: every traumagenic system's experience with their plurality varies, and it's valid for those who struggle with it to speak up. but it's important you don't ever say the system itself is to blame. something every traumagenic system has to accept is that their mind did what it had to do to protect oneself from the reality of the trauma. again, it's valid to be ambivalent, to struggle, and to even want to integrate to the point of fusion/final fusion. but some traumagenic/disordered systems, such as myself, still find joy in our multiplicity. Jeni Haynes, a diagnosed polyfrag DID system of almost 2.7k identities, has said both she and her psychiatrist don't consider her condition to be a mental illness, but rather an act of love. i think more people would better understand and appreciate almost any kind of plurality if seen as that.

i hope this answered your question! lmk if you need me to follow anything up!

-- Mod Galaxy

[clotpolesonly]

📙

TW/Supernatural fusion in which Stiles is both Dean and Sam and Allison is both Dean and Adam and the relationship is very complicated.

Stiles' parents were killed by a demon or monster when he was quite young and he was taken in by Chris Argent, who raised him in the hunter way. Stiles is well versed and experienced in hunting by the time he leaves his teens, having acted as Chris' protege and backup for most of his life. and he fucking hates it. maybe he didn't once, but he's grown to hate the life and the way Chris molded him to be -- a good little soldier, expected to follow orders without question. there's a breaking point. a blazing row was had and Stiles officially left the life, opting to fuck off to college like a normal fucking person instead, and he doesn't intend to look back, even if it's impossible to truly leave it all behind when you know what really goes bump in the night.

Allison, meanwhile, was not raised in the life. she was deliberately sheltered, most often left behind and lied to about both her father's business and who he was doing it with. she didn't even know Stiles existed until after he'd already left and her father was injured on a solo hunt gone wrong. feeling horribly spurned and devalued, Allison is determined to prove that her father was wrong not to include her, to be someone that her father can rely on in a fight. she throws her back into becoming the best hunter -- better than her father's secret son could've possibly been.

then Chris goes missing. and as far as Allison has come in the two years she's been running with him, she's not experienced enough to find him on her own. she's forced to reach out to the one person she'd hoped she would never have to: Stiles, who is NOT best pleased at the prospect of being dragged back into Chris' orbit. but no matter how angry or resentful he is, Chris raised him. and when his girlfriend Heather meets a gruesome and unexpected end by a demon's hand, he has nothing tying him down anymore.

Allison may be openly hostile towards him, but she needs his help and so does Chris. and the only good thing Chris ever taught Stiles was the importance of helping those in need.

this is gonna be one hell of a road trip.

.

send me a book emoji for the plot of a fic that i haven't written but daydream about!!