#we have 3 new holes in our walls now

[karvakera]

drawing gojo every day as stupid pet memes until THE shibuya incident: day 22

[in1-nutshell]

Hello! I am SOO sorry that I have been cramping you with asks, so feel as free as you can be to push this one alll the way back, or deny it, I am not desperate at all. I just want to type this before I forget this. So after the Megatron with a daughter who was his opposite post, I, too, am in love with this opposite personality daughter series. Like just all of our favourite men as fathers of daughters with individual personalities of themselves but also more or less all resonated their fathers one way or another, or someone they knew! I LOVE IT! And I realized how this formed a perfect trilogy now.

So I am real curious. What if the three daughters exist in the same universe? And, may or may not interact? (would we need individual names for them all? Or Buddy 1 and 2 and 3 like Spider-Man: No Way Home and no one questions it?)

Hello!

I've actually been thinking about continuing the 'daughter with different personality' thing. Maybe in the future you'll see more!

Originally the plan was to have all the Buddy's to be in the same universe, but I ended up scrapping the idea and decided to create separate universes for each one (unless the plot tells me otherwise :))

When I saw the Spiderman part my mind went to this.

(Who knows for the future)

Hope you enjoy!

Optimus Prime, Ratchet, and Megatron's daughters meeting each other for the first time.

SFW, Platonic, Familial, groundbridge and relic shenanigans, Cybertronain reader

TFP

In TFP Rats universe.

Buddy was just minding her own business cleaning and wiping down her father’s tools.

It’s a nice day on base.

There was low Decepticon activity for the past few days, the children were playing their games, Bulkhead and Smokescreen were trying to get Bumblebee and Arcee to play Lob with them, Ultra Magnus and Optimus were reviewing plans for something, and her father, Ratchet, was with Wheeljack looking at a new relic they found in the Artic.

“It’s not another scraplet trap, right?”--Raf

“Nope! Completely checked it with the scanner. We should be good now.”--Buddy

“We ‘should’ be good?”--Bulkhead

“There is always a percentage of things blowing up, I’m not counting that out.”--Buddy

Without warning, the relic whirled to life jumping and shaking onto the floor.

Everyone jumped and backed away from the whirling sound it made. Bright light came out of it as the shaking intensified. The noise was loud enough to get everyone to come to the main room.

The machine scanned the closest bot, Buddy, and opened a portal, shooting out tons of air.

The children nearly flew back, but thanks to Ultra Magnus and Optimus, they were caught before they flew off the ledge.

“Hey Ratchet! What’s it doing?!”--Bulkhead

“Oh, it’s putting on a rock concert. OBVIOUSLY, I DON’T KNOW!”--Ratchet

Machine whirls louder.

“Buddy! Hide behind the med slab!”--Wheeljack

Buddy already behind the slab, clutching onto dear life.

“With all due respect, WHAT DO YOU THINK I’M DOING?!”--Buddy

Meanwhile in megs dimension

Buddy calmly walking down the halls of the Nemesis with some data pads.

“Hmm… wonder why they need so many data pads…”--Buddy

Sudden portal pops up on the wall next to them.

“What in the—”--Buddy

Portal starts sucking her in.

“AHHH—”--Buddy

Portal sucks Buddy in leaving the discarded data pads sprawled in the middle of the hallway.

In op dimension

Buddy is resting her arm on the handrail while talking with Miko.

“How’s the playlist going?”--Miko

“Haven’t been working too much on it. Patrol has been up my tailpipe lately. Do you have any more recommendations?”--Buddy

“Yeah! How about—”—Miko

A sudden portal opens.

“Umm, I don’t remember Ratchet opening up a groundbridge.”--Miko

Buddy grabbing a grenade from her subspace.

“That’s because he hasn’t!”--Buddy

Buddy chucks a grenade at the portal.

BAM!

Nothing happens to the portal.

“What!”—Miko and Buddy

The portal starts sucking them in.

Buddy grabs Miko as she starts to get dragged in, pounds a hole in the ledge and places her in there.

“Buddy? Buddy what are you—”--Miko

Buddy groans as she tries to keep her footing but gets sucked in and the portal closes.

“BUDDY!”--Miko

In Rats dimension

Two figures pop out of the portal and slam into Ratchet’s daughter.

The portal closes.

The two figures groaned.

Op Buddy sits up rubbing her helm.

Meg Buddy sliding off the med slab and onto the floor on her back.

“Urgh… my aching helm…”—Megs Buddy

Rat Buddy gently massaging her helm before looking at the two strangers.

“Who are you?”—Rat Buddy

Op Buddy looks at the others.

“Who are you?!”—Op Buddy

Meg Buddy looking at all the Autobots in the area.

“WHERE AM I?!”—Meg Buddy

Optimus carefully approaches the younglings.

Megs Buddy quickly moves back while the other two just stare widely.

“Buddy—”--Optimus

“Yes?”—All Buddy’s

All Buddy’s turn around and point at each other.

“Your name is Buddy! I’m Buddy!”—All Buddy’s

Meg Buddy standing up pacing a bit.

“Maybe this is some alternate universe…I always thought something like this was possible from what he said… It’s the only logical explanation for this…”—Megs Buddy

“That seems to check out. Which explains why Dad hasn’t started giving me the ‘speech’ again.”—Op Buddy

“Dad?”--Kids

“… Oh, this is going to be fun.”—Op Buddy

“This is not going to be fun…”—Meg Buddy

Everyone is confused.

Come to find the relic would scan someone and find ‘alternatives’ of them. It could mean alternative of the bot or by their names.

To avoid confusion the Buddy’s are labeled.

Op’s Buddy would be known as Buddy 1.

Rats Buddy would be known as Buddy 2.

Megs Buddy would be known as Buddy 3.

“How come she’s Buddy 1? Why not our Buddy? She was hear before you guys showed up.”--Miko

“Cause I’m older and cooler.”—Buddy 1

“Yeah right.”--Miko

“Don’t believe me Miko? Watch this.”—Buddy 1

Buddy 1 transforms into a monster truck.

“I take it back! That’s so cool! Can I ride you!?”--Miko

“Of course!”—Buddy 1

“Miko no!”--Bulkhead

“Miko yes!”--Miko

“Then why is our Buddy number two?”--Raf

“Because I’m the second oldest. Three is the youngest one here.”—Buddy 2

“Guess it makes sense. You she is kind a smaller than you two.”--Jack

“Hey! I’m a minicon! Of course, I’m smaller than everyone here!”—Buddy 3

“You’re a minicon?”--Arcee

Buddy 3 shrinks back a bit at Arcee’s gaze nodding.

Buddy 1 made the Team guess who her father was, bets were on the table and ready to be thrown. Buddy 1 managed to get Buddy 3 to get in on the guessing part. Buddy 3 guaranteed that no one would guess her creator.

A part of her didn’t want them to know either.

“All right we are ready.”--Miko

“Wow so soon?”—Buddy 3

“Too soon if you asked me.”—Buddy 1

“We’ve narrowed down three bots for each. If we win, 1 needs to take me out dune bashing in her alt mode.”--Miko

“Miko!”--Bulkhead

“I can stand by that.”—Buddy 1

“And if you don’t guess right?”—Buddy 2

“You’ll have to tell us.”--Miko

“…”—Buddy 3

“Lets get started!”--Miko

“Okay these ones are for Buddy 1.”--Smokescreen

“Got it, lets hear them.”—Buddy 1

“First one… Wheeljack!”--Miko

Buddy 1 laughing at the response.

“HAHAHAHA, Sorry, its just, just that Jackie here is more like my Uncle. Definitely not my dad.”—Buddy 1

“All righty then… Bulkhead!”--Miko

Buddy starts laughing at that one too.

“Nope! Bulks also like my Uncle!”—Buddy 1

“The last one… Smokescreen!”—Miko

Buddy is now on the floor laughing her tanks and near crying.

“…I’ll take that as a no then…”--Raf

Buddy finally stops laughing.

“You lose.”—Buddy 1

“Got that. Now spill it! Who’s your Dad?!”--Miko

Buddy stands up rather stoically.

“One shall stand, one shall fall.”—Buddy 1

Everyone stares at Optimus, who looks equally as surprised.

“Your—your Boss Bots kid!? How!?”--Miko

“A question everyone has been asking since we met.”—Buddy 1

Miko turns to Buddy 3.

She hoped that they would have forgotten her, but alas here she was.

“Your turn!”--Miko

Buddy 3 nervously sits next to Prime and Ratchet

“First one… Arcee!”--Miko

Buddy 3 looking terrified.

“NO! I mean no.”--Buddy 3

“How about… Ultra Magnus!”--Miko

Buddy shakes her helm while looking at Magnus.

“Sorry try again.”—Buddy 3

“Okay… Optimus!”--Miko

Buddy 1 looks at Buddy 3.

“Are we siblings!?”—Buddy 1

“I mean aren’t we all in a way?”—Buddy 3

“Buddy.”--Ratchet

“Sorry, the answer is no.”—Buddy 3

“Dang it!”--Miko

“Then who is your Dad?”--Raf

“…Megatron…”—Buddy 3

“…”—Everyone

“HOW!”--Jack

Buddy shrinks back at the sudden movements.

Buddy 1 and Buddy 2 immediately stand by Buddy 3

“Hold it now. Just because 3 dad is Bucket head, no offense.”—Buddy 1

“None taken.”—Buddy 3

“Doesn’t mean she’s bad. Right?”—Buddy 2

“No, no I’m not.”—Buddy 3

“Really and how can you prove it?”--Arcee

“Arcee—”—Buddy 2

“Well think about this. If I was truly bad, why haven’t I hurt you.”—Buddy 3

“Because your short?”--Smokescreen

“… Okay that one’s asking for it… but beside the point, I could have easily hurt the kids, yet I haven’t. I could have attacked or given any other hint that I had malicious intentions. But I haven’t, have I?”—Buddy 3

Pause

“I stand by 3.”—Buddy 1

“And I stand with 1 and 3.”—Buddy 2

“I will stand by her as well.”--Optimus

“Prime!”—Most of the team

“Prime?”—Buddy 3

“She is our guest and so is 1. We must treat them with the respect they deserve.”--Optimus

“…Thank you Prime.”—Buddy 3

After the confrontation a little more research is done on the machine.

Thanks to Buddy 3’s expert decoding skills, she was able to read the full effects of the machine as well as how to reverse it.

The good news was that the effects were reversable.

The bad news was that the machine needed time to recuperate before usage again.

The Buddy’s decided to kill time by hanging out with each other and the team in the meantime.

Aka shenanigan time.

1 tries to start a conversation with her alternate family especially with Prime.

She is curious to see if there are any differences between her father and her alternative father.

“You always did have a thing for the Halls, didn’t you?”—Buddy 1

“The Halls of Iacon was where I worked.”--Optimus

“You mean, where Orion worked.”—Buddy 1

“…Yes.”--Optimus

“Sorry, but I see Orion and Optimus as two separate bots sometimes.”—Buddy 1

“It is understandable.”--Optimus

3 tended to stay with 2 for the most part.

2 was a soft soul and was quiet for the most part.

2 did entertain 3 with the occasional story here and there.

Buddy 2 and 3 talking to each other near the med bay.

“What do you think they’re talking about?”--Smokescreen

“Beep boop bep bop boop. (Probably about medical stuff.)”--Bumblebee

“Yeah, probably.”--Smokescreen

“So, then Arcee raised her blasters at the wannabe Cybertronians and started blasting.”—Buddy 2

Buddy 3 listening intently.

1 likes to place 2 and 3 on her shoulders.

1 being the tallest and bulkiest of the Buddy’s could support the weight, not that they did weigh anything to her.

The other two Buddy’s liked feeling tall.

“Hey! Hey! Look at this!”—Buddy 1

Buddy 1 supporting Buddy 2 on her shoulders while Buddy 3 was on top.

“We are Buddy Supreme!”—Buddy 2

Buddy 1 has a bright smile on her face.

Buddy 2 has a wobbly smile trying not to laugh while carrying 3.

Buddy 3 is just staring in amazement.

“So, this is what it’s like to be tall… this is nice.”—Buddy 3

Soon it was time for them to leave.

3 really doesn’t want to leave her new friends behind.

She certainly doesn’t want to go back to the dark halls of the Nemesis.

But this pleasant experience was soon to be the spark to ignite the flame for peace between the two fractions again.

She was going to do everything she could to end this war with peace.

Whether Megatron liked it or not.

“It was lovely seeing you all and knowing there are alternative versions of myself out there. I hope we meet again on much pleasanter terms in the future.”—Buddy 3

“Same goes to you 3!”—Buddy 1 and 2

Buddy 3 walks through the portal.

A flash of purple shines before returning to its natural color.

“It’s your turn kid—”--Wheeljack

“SEE YA!”—Buddy 1

Buddy 1 back flips into the portal before a flash of blue shines.

The portal turns off and all is still.

“…Well, wasn’t that an eventful Wednesday afternoon?”—Buddy

In megs universe

Buddy bounces off the wall of the Nemesis.

Literally.

“For once I’d wish for a smooth landing…”--Buddy

“Buddy.”--Soundwave

Buddy looks up to see Soundwave.

Buddy waves.

“Hey Soundwave.”--Buddy

Soundwave starts walking forward.

“Sorry about the data pads—”--Buddy

Soundwave is in front of Buddy.

“I swear I meant to go straight to the room when—”--Buddy

Soundwave gets down on his knees and pulls Buddy in a tight hug.

Buddy freezes for a moment before hugging back.

None say anything, just holding onto each other in one of the empty halls of the Nemesis.

In op universe

Buddy gets thrown at Bumblebee and Smokescreen.

“OW!”--Buddy

“BEEP! (BUDDY!)”--Bumblebee

“BUDDY!”--Smokescreen

Both bots hugging Buddy’s sides tightly.

“We heard from Miko that you go sucked into some groundbridge or something!”--Smokescreen

Buddy patting both bots helms.

Bumblebee digs his helm further in Buddy’s neck cables whirling in concern and relief.

“Boy, do I have a story to tell you guys. But let’s wait till everyone gets here, I can’t wait to see Doc bot’s reaction to his daughter.”--Buddy

“HIS WHAT!?”—Smokescreen and Bumblebee

“MY WHAT!”--Ratchet

[afterhourwriting]

Mini Glossary at the end. Words in red will be in glossary.

TW: Lots of Scottish phrases; choking; spanking; praise and degrading; talk of making the reader pregnant (or literally just breeding)

2/3 update: Just now reading this back and realized this was supposed to be a ‘first time having sex’ thing… but I’m sure it’ll be fine. I think

“Please be gentle..”

Were the words you remember saying at the beginning of all of this. But now look at you; fucked dumb and fucked rough underneath the man that had promised he would keep it slow and sweet for your first time. Johnny whispered each and every dirty thought that came to mind in his ear, letting you feel his hot breath against your neck as he panted like a wild dog.

“Feel so fuckin’ good. So damn tight! Fuck, lassie, li’ah’?” He groaned as your wet walls clamped down around his girthy cock as he mercilessly pounded into you, not stopping for anything. This was his favorite pastime whenever he was on leave and hadn’t seen you for quite some time. You always managed to get tighter with your time apart, and it was fucking incredible that Johnny had the chance to stretch you out again.

The Scotsmans hands gripped your hips tightly as he pulled your ass back to meet his thrusts. “Mokit.. fucking hoor. You were practically gantin’ fer it, eh? Say it, c’mon. Lemme hear you. Say you wanted me!” Johnny growled as one of his hands flew to wrap around your throat, squeezing just enough to let you feel that delicious sensation of his fingers wrapping around your neck; but not entirely enough to outright knock the wind out of you… at least not yet.

“I-I wanted you, Johnny! I wanted you s-so fucking BAD.” You cried out, gripping onto the sheets beneath you as you felt your boyfriend’s hand curl tighter. If you weren’t close already you certainly were now! Johnny’s cock twitched against your walls as your words rang through his head. “Good girl. Shite! Gaun cum all inside this pretty lit’le hole. Gaun make you a maw n’ have you carry my bairn. Our bairn.” This kind of dirty talk from Johnny wasn’t entirely unexpected, nor was it anything new.. but something about tonight felt he might go on with his promise. You moaned as you felt his hand come down and slap your ass harshly before returning to your neck.

“You gonnae let me cum inside you? You’d look so fucking bonnie carryin’ our kid. Please let me, lassie! Please let me get you pregnant, hen.”

Now how could you say no when he asked so nicely?

Mini glossary:

Li’ah’ - ‘Like that’

Mokit - ‘Dirty’

Hoor (could also be hure, hore, hooer or whure) - ‘A whore’

Gantin’(or gaggin’) fer it - ‘Begging for’

Gaun - ‘Going’ could also be ‘go on and’

Maw - ‘Mum’ or ‘Mom’ if you’re American.

Bairn - ‘Baby’ can also be used for ‘Small child’

Hen - Term of endearment, like ‘Sweetie’ or ‘Darling’

A/N: Can we please have Soap say more Scottish shit during sex? 🙏🏽 also, I said I was gonna do gay butt sex but I changed my mind. And I’m not that great of a writer, sue me, at least I tried ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[4pfsukuna]

Love love LOVE the asexual drabbles and headcannons! Could you do one with Gojo & black asexual woman? Like she teases him ‘i’ll only mess around if you give me a dollar’ as a snarky joke and he’s like ‘i’m rich baby hell yes’ and keeps the joke running🤭 I know i’ll enjoy anything you write! Thank you in advance!

OMG, thank you im glad you love them because i actually love writing them.

• You met him at the mall…the prada store to be exact, you weren’t necessarily shopping more so just debating on a purse or a pair of boots.

•You were a stylist in japan and your clients loved your American style although they had way cooler clothes. Safe to say business was flourishing.

•Yet here you are trying not to blow through money too fast so you were Legit window shopping.

.•The last thing you expect is a white haired man to stand next to you and startle you, you assume he’s going to say something about your hair as most people had done i mean you were a black person in japan.

• He’s holding a few bags and a cup you initially assume he’s blind because of the blindfold but when he begins to talk about the shoe, your slightly confused but you have decorum so you don’t say anything.

• “I’ve had my eye on the bag for a few weeks but they just dropped the new boots so I’m debating” you say and what’s $950 To any normal person its like a penny to him.

• “How about i buy both and you wear them on our first date” he says smoothly leaning up against the glass window and you laugh at first until you realize hes dead serious. You weren’t use to men here flirting with you and it makes you nervous.

• “Usually people start off with their names” you tell him before introducing yourself as you hold out your hand which he places a kiss on.

• “Gojo Satoru” lifting his blindfold revealing the brightest blue eyes you’ve ever seen

• You also notice he has a tag hanging off his shirt and it cost $1500.

• You decline him buying the stuff for you but accept his offer for a date. What’s the worst that could happen?

• He doesn’t know what he’s expecting when he sees you, he thought you were already gorgeous at the mall but looking at you right now it makes something… stir.

• He told you to dress cute but casual he was taking you sight seeing— he never mentioned it would be in a helicopter over the city.

• It’s obvious this man has money to blow and you contemplate looking him up to figure out just who he is.

• He also brings the shoes and bag as a gift, he couldn’t resist! Plus he likes loves the way your face initially lights up before trying to be humble and give it back.

• He lies and tells you its rude to not accept gifts.

• “Gojo i cant accept this without you knowing all about me…” you speak pouting knowing the good time was coming to an end and while the shoes and bag looked perfect you had to confess.

• “Its the wrong size?” He asked looking at your foot and back at the box on the table.

•“What? No strangely enough you got the right size…im asexual” 

•“…thats… cool. I can write with both hands too”

“Gojo thats ambidextrous! Asexual means—“

• “Im just kidding sweetheart, of course i know what it means”

•He definitely did not and googled it under the table.

• You know the meme “we hung out once and weve been together ever since” that was you two.

• The next few weeks he finds time to either take you to breakfast, lunch or dinner and on days hes completely free he’ll take you on some one of a kind date experience. 

• Hes a kid at heart so when you take him to a virtual reality place and literally fight to pay, you have to distract him by kissing him and biting gently on his lower lip.

•He loved it nobodys every paid for anything for him and the fact that you planned the date, paid and had a great experience hes lovestruck.

• He ended up paying since he put a hole in the wall fighting demons in the game mentioning something about it feeling to real.

•Its when 3 of his students run into you two and their shocked he’s not harassing you and actually enjoying voluntarily spending time with him, mainly because he has no idea who you are.

• Nobara follows all of your socials loving your day in the life videos, style advice videos even when you have your celebrity clients in the videos.

•Its megumi knowing who you are and thinking you’re cool that seals the deal for him.

•Gojo loves your cooking so the day you pack him leftovers with a cute smiley face and a note hes literally on the desk kicking his feet in the air… weirding out his students. This was next level even for him.

•They beg to bring you around loving seeing him happy with you.

•Its a collective though and nobara who wants to enjoy regular teen things breaks the ice officially by asking 

“Take this dollar or have sex with Gojo-sensei?”

“Give me the dollar” at the same time he shouts her name. Hes also taken aback cause what do you mean youre going to take the dollar.

“No babe i dont think you heard the question take a dollar or—“

“Give me the dollar”

•For the rest of the day Gojo chooses to be dramatic from the grocery store to the hair supply store where guess whos short $1 of buying hair supplies. You turn to him seeing hes fascinated with the hair clips and different color edge controls.

•“Hey sweetheart i think you should get all of these” he suggest ready to pick them all up waiting on your command. 

•“Hey babe im short” you tell him and he scoffs not paying you any mind looking at the conditioners catagorized by hair type.

“I knew that when i first seen you… what’s your hair type? Does 4b mean 4 everyone? Like your down for interracial dating… how do they know that by hair type? Like hard wig soft life?” He rambles and you almost lose it.

“No im short $1” and he sends you the most devious smirk as he holds open his wallet repeating the question Nobara asked.

“Give me the dollar” you smirk back watching his smile be taken over by a glare as he gives the cashier his card to pay for everything  instead.

“Dont give me that look baby, im rich now come on i ordered a package for you” he loves to buy you things he jokingly ask siri how much the world cost one time.

“Satoru it better not be another pair of prada shoes” you scold as he carries the bags, his silence tells you everything you need to know though.

“Babe I’m running out of space to put all the stuff you bought me, please” you pout loving that this was a problem in your relationship and not anything else.

“I have enough space… You can live with me instead”

[lousypotatoes]

Let The Stormy Clouds Chase

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9

Song Recommendation:

Killing Butterflies - Lou Bliss

Present Day...

Y/N, Angel Dust, and Vaggie were sitting in the living room, listening to Charlie rant about the new extermination date.

"Okay. So, the extermination is coming in six months instead of a year," Charlie ranted, pacing around the room. "No big deal. Just a little setback. Nothing we can't handle. Just angels cutting our timetable in half. But who needs a whole year to save souls? Am I right? And next time when they cut the time in half again and again, we'll just handle it right?!"

"Yes, we will," Vaggie said, grabbing onto Charlie's suit.

"Oh, please," Angel said while scrolling on his phone. "Ya had less than half a chance when you started all this salvation bullshit. And now...ain't no silver lining this time toots."

"Sure there is, Angel," Y/N said. "We just have to look a little harder for it, that's all." Charlie sent her a grateful smile.

"Well, while she's lookin'," Angel said. "The rest of Hell is going nuts. People are already freaking out about the news. Look at what's happening in the Doomsday District." he said, showing them his phone. Suddenly, a message from Angel's boss popped up on his phone.

"Uhhh, what is a donkey show?" Charlie asked, confused.

"Ah, heh, nothing!" Angel panicked. "My boss, Val, is just freaked out about the news too."

At the mention of Valentino's name, Y/N scrunched up her face in disgust. "Like I said, everyone's losing their shit." Angel finished.

"Yeah, that's true. Sinners are desperate," Vaggie said thoughtfully. "Maybe desperate enough to try anything to escape the extermination?"

Charlie gasped. "This is the perfect time to recruit more sinners for the hotel!"

"Good idea, Vaggie," Y/N chuckled.

"Cute idea and all," Angel said. "But you really going to go out in all of this?" He showed them his phone again, there was fire everywhere and demons were getting killed left and right. It made Y/N cringe.

"Well, it's not like people are just going to show up on our doorstep."

As soon as Charlie finished her sentence, there was a big explosion outside that destroyed the wall.

"Alassstor! Assasssin! Show yourssself!" said a voice from outside.

"Who the fuck could that be?" Y/N mumbled, getting out of her seat and flying out of the hole in the wall. When she got outside, Alastor was already standing out there.

Above the hotel, stood a steampunk looking blimp. Looking up, Y/N saw that the person who was piloting the aircraft was a snake demon.

"Face my wrath!" the snake shouted.

"I'm sorry, but who are you?" Y/N asked.

"Who am I? Who am I?" the snake repeated. "I am the great Sir Pentiousss! Inventor, architect of dessstruction, villian extraordinaire!"

By the time he finished talking, Vaggie, Charlie, and Angel Dust had made it out of the Hotel, they were now looking up at the blimp.

"Isn't this the guy who attacked us last week?" Angel asked.

"I would of loved to see that," Y/N said.

Nifty gasped, suddenly appearing on Alastor's head. "Ooh, he's a bad boy," Nifty said, a wicked grin on her face.

"Huh, well if all that's true, you'd think we'd have heard of you," Alastor said, setting Nifty on the ground.

"I attacked you literally last week," Sir Pentious said. Alastor tilted his head in confusion. "We've done battle like... twenty times."

"Well, you must have been really bad at this,"

"Yeah, I don't recall fighting with you, like ever," Y/N said, feeling bored.

"Silence!" Sir Pentious shouted. "Now cower! For when I've ssslain you, the almighty Vees will finally acknowledge me as their equal!"

"Almighty Vees my ass," Y/N said under her breath as Nifty crawled on her.

"Ooh! Wait, who are the Vees?" Nifty asked.

"No one you need to worry about, Nifty," Y/N said.

"Enough!" Sir Pentious shouted. "Alassstor! Assssassin! Feel my wrat-"

Sir Pentious never got to finish his sentence. Long black tendrils sprouted out of Alastor's back and grabbed onto the steampunk blimp, shaking it around. Alastor began to laugh manically.

"Oh! Please! Stop!" Sir Pentious shouted.

"Um, Alastor?" Charlies said, concerned. "I think he's had enough."

"Nah, he's got a few more hits in 'im!" Angel said, smirking.

"Yeah, let him have his fun," Y/N said giggling.

As the blimp started to shake around more, Sir Pentious finally fell out, landing flat on his face.

Looking up, Y/N saw that there was a drone right next to the blimp, the camera pointing towards the hotel.

"Fucking Christ," Y/N mumbled. "I swear, I'm gonna kill Vox." Nobody heard her.

"Thanks for another forgettable experience!" Alastor said, twirling his cane. An egg thing fell right next to Y/N and splattered. Grossed out, she stepped away from it.

"Thank... you..." Sir Pentious said weakly. "For letting your guard down!" Suddenly, using his tail, he ripped off a piece of Alastor's coat. "Haha! Yeah! Oh, shit."

Suddenly, Sir Pentious was blasted away.

"Well, it looks as though I need a visit to the tailor," Alastor said cheerfully. "Would you like to accompany me, Y/N?"

"Hm?" Y/N said, taking her eyes off the drone. "Oh, yeah, sure. I've been meaning to stop by there anyway."

"Excellent!" Alastor said, beckoning her to follow him. "Best of luck chums!"

"Wait, you guys can't leave!" Vaggie said. "We need your help. We need you to do your job."

"We need a wall," Angel said, gesturing to the big hole in the wall.

"Of course. We can't let our new project fall into disrepair already, now can we, Y/N?" he said, nudging her. "What would the papers say?"

The two of them snapped their fingers. Alastor summoned some construction demons and Y/N summoned some tools for them to use. The two of then walked off.

"I couldn't help but notice," Alastor said as they walked. "What was in the sky that had you so distracted, my dear?"

"You didn't see the drone?" Y/N asked.

"Ah, that's what you were looking at," Alastor said. "Yes, I saw the drone."

"It's probably from VoxTech," Y/N grumbled. "Knowing him, he's gonna take every opportunity he can to spy on the hotel, especially 'cause me and you are there."

"Ah, you seem to know Vox quite well." Alastor said, jealousy knawing at him a tiny bit. "Why is that?"

"We were acquainted for a little bit," Y/N said. "That's all I'm gonna share for now."

"If that's all you would like to reveal, that's fine," Alastor said, his smile seeming a bit more forced. "It's rude to pry."

"Say's you," Y/N said, a playful smirk on her face. "Your one of the most nosiest people I know."

"You say that like it's a bad thing, dear," Alastor said, she chuckled.

"I swear, if I see that man again, I'm rippin' his pathetic head off,"

"He was only complementing you," Alastor laughed lightly.

"He was doin' it in a way I didn't like," Y/N said, looking across the street at the electronics store. "Ugh, I hate seeing Vox's stupid face every time I walk past that store."

"Top of the hour and we're discussing a certain has-been who has been spotted cavorting around town after a seven-year absence!" Vox's fake cheery voice came from the T.V.

Even hearing his voice pissed Y/N off, especially since he was talking about Alastor.

" I'm sorry, dear," Alastor said, a smirk on his face. "I'm afraid I have to cut this short, I have some business to take care of regarding a noisy picture box."

Y/N grinned, knowing he was talking about Vox.

"No need to say sorry, Al," she said. "Do me a favor, embarrass the hell outta him."

Alastor's grin grew wider. "I'll do my best, my dear."

With one final look at her, he melted into the shadows, no doubt heading to his radio station.

Wanting to see what was going to happen, she walked closer to the electronic store. The crowd didn't pay any attention to her, too preoccupied listening to flat screen demon.

Otherwise, the crowd of people would of ran for the hills.

"Alastor's a loser, he's a fossil, and I don't mean to sound hostile, but the demon is a coward!" said Vox's voice from the T.V.

Y/N laughed, knowing what really went on that day.

"You can play that as gospel, folks. He thinks he can take my viewers?" he laughed. "Impossible. Stop giving him the time of day. Don't listen to anything he says. Alastor should have stayed away!"

Y/N hoped that whatever Alastor was planning would be good.

"Hell's been better off since he disappeared," he said. "Wondering where he's been? Who gives a shit! He-"

Suddenly, a voice came from the radio in the window from the radio store next door. Y/N's eyes lit up in anticipation.

"Salutations sinners!" Alastor's voice came from the radio. "It's good to be back on the air!"

Hearing the Radio Demon's voice, the crowd moved over to the front of the radio store.

On the TV, Y/N could see Vox's shocked and angry face. It made her giggle.

"I know it's been a while since someone with this much style treated Hell to a radio broadcast," Alastor said. "Sinners rejoice!"

"What a dated voice," Vox said.

"Instead of a clout chasing video podcast," Y/N could hear the smirk in Alastor's voice.

Deciding she didn't want to be surrounded by all these sinners, Y/N immediately unfurled her wings and flew back to the hotel as fast as she could.

Landing on her balcony, she ran into her room, turned on the radio, and turned her phone to the broadcast, hoping she didn't miss too much.

"Is Vox as strong as he claims or is it merely based on support?" Alastor said, making Y/N laugh. "He'd be powerful without the other Vee's."

"Oh please," Vox snarled.

"There was once a time when Vox asked me to join his team, I said no and that's why he's so pissy," Alastor said. "That's the tea!"

"You ØŁʥ timey prick!" Vox shouted. "I'll show you şµʩʩɞʁʁɨŋɠ!"

"Uh oh, the T.V. is buffering," Alastor said smuggly.

The T.V. signal started to break up. "ⅰII ʤşɫʁØʏ ʏØØ-Ø-⋃-⋃ ʏØ⋃ Įiɫɫɩɚ-"

Looking out the window, all the power in Pentagram City started to go out. Y/N was glad that the hotel was hooked up to a generator.

"I'm afraid you lost your signal," the Radio Demon said.

Satisfied, Y/N turned off the radio, heading downstairs.

"When'd you get here babycakes?" Angel asked when he saw Isabell coming down the stairs.

"Just now," she said, sitting next to him. "I came in through my balcony."

"Uh huh," he said, wiggling his eyebrows. "So what did you creepy voice do hmm?"

"All we did was go to tailor, you have such a dirty mind,"

"It pays off,"

The two of them talked a bit more until Vaggie and Charlie came in. Charlie flopped on the couch with and groaned, a disappointed look on her face.

"So how'd it go?" Angel asked.

Vaggie sighed. "Not a single new recruit,"

"Yeah. Well, who would want to use their last days not fucking and fighting?"

"I'm sure there are plenty of people, Angel," Y/N said, elbowing his side.

"Sure there are," he replied as Vaggie went to go answer the door.

Y/N heard a thud and Vaggie yelling.

"You should probably go check that out, Charlie," Y/N suggested..

As Charlie walked over the front door, Y/N peered over her shoulder and saw that the snake demon who attacked them earlier was there.

"Holy shit Angel!" she exclaimed. "It's that guy who attacked us earlier."

"No fucking way," Angel said, getting up and walking over, Y/N followed him.

"Are you fucking nuts?" Angel said, standing in the doorway. "This chump was trying to kill us, like literally six hours ago. And now you want to bring him in here to live with us?"

"Absolutely!" Charlie smiled. "This place is about second chances, and who deserves one more than this...slithery...slippery...special little man."

"This could end up in a pile of shit," Y/N muttered. "Aren't you like, the protector of this place, Vaggie?"

Charlie did puppy eyes over to Vaggie.

Vaggie sighed. "I...guess he's not much of a threat without the war machine," she said, making Sir Pentious smile. "Or even with the war machine."

Sir Pentious' smile dropped into a frown.

"Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you!" Charlie exclaimed, hugging Vaggie tightly. "Sir Pentious! Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel!"

"Oh, no darling, thank you," Sir Pentious said, as Y/N eyed him up and down suspiciously. "You won't regret this."

"Eh, I give you a week tops," Angel said, as they all walked back into the Hotel.

Upon further inspection, Y/N noticed that Sir Pentious was wearing a high tech watch. The kind that Vox Tech sold.

"Don't worry, if he tries anything, I'll kill him," Y/N muttered over to Angel.

"What do you think about our newest guest, hm?" Alastor asked.

Alastor and Y/N were on Y/N's balcony, staring out into Pentagram City, something the two of them did quite often since she arrived at the hotel.

"There's somethin' about him that I can't quite put my finger on," she answered, leaning on the railing. "But whatever it is, I don't like it."

"Maybe you're being too quick to judge, dear," he said softy.

"Says you," Y/N said, playfully nudging him.

It was quiet for a moment, Y/N thought about what to say to clear the awkward tension.

"Can I ask you somethin', Alastor?" she said. "You don't have to answer if you don't want to, I'm just curious."

"Ask away, my dear,"

"How in the world did you get shot in the head by a hunter?"

Alastor didn't say anything at first. Y/N couldn't tell if he was annoyed at the question or not.

"I was burying a body in the woods," he said. "At the time I didn't know, but I was on hunting grounds. This idiot man thought I was a deer."

Y/N remembered the day she got the call like it was yesterday.

"I guess that explains why you're a deer," she snickered.

"How did you die, Y/N?" he asked. "You don't have to answer if it makes you uncomfortable."

"No, no, it's fine," she waved off. "It's not as gruesome as yours, but one night, about a year after you died, I was cleanin up some bodies in an abandoned church, when all of a sudden, a cop came barrelin' in. He shot me at least nineteen times."

"Nineeten times?" Alastor asked, his eyebrows raised. "That seems like a little much."

"Oh well," she shrugged her shoulders. "It doesn't matter anymore, now that I'm stuck down here."

It was quiet for another moment.

"I'm sorry for leavin' you, my dear," Alastor whispered. "I can't imagine what it must have been for you."

"Why are you apologizin' for?" Y/N asked, turning to look at him. "You didn't do anything wrong. It's not your fault you got shot."

"What was it like?" he asked. "After I died."

"It was hard," she admitted. "Really hard. It took me a while to get out of my house and do simple things like go grocery shoppin' or run the flower shop."

Alastor took her hand in his. "I swear to you, dear, I will never leave you alone, again."

Y/N smiled, giving his hand a gentle squeeze. "We're in Hell, Alastor, we're not goin' anywhere."

The two of them laughed softly.

"We should probably head back down there," Y/N said, removing her hand from his. "Charlie said she wanted to show us somethin'."

"I suppose you're right," Alastor said. "Care to walk down with me, my dear?" he said offering his arm.

Y/N giggled "Why, it would be my pleasure," she said, interlocking her arm with his.

"'Oh, I'm a bad man on the streets who never got enough hugs." Angel said sarcastically, reading off a script

Angel was currently wearing a large trench coat and a tiny hat, while Sir Pentious was wearing a white and yellow sailor shirt and a black hat, and a licking a large lollipop.

"'Now, where's an innocent kid I can sell crack to?'" Angel said.

"Wow. Who wrote this?" Angel said in disbelief.

"It's great right?" Charlie said, a smile on her face. "Keep going!"

Y/N giggled.

"'Hey, you," Angel said, pointing to Sir Pentious.

"'Who, me?'" Sir Pentious said, batting his eyelashes.

"'Yeah, you look like a kid who could use some devil's dandruff,'" Angel said, a bored look on his face. "Oh, for fuck's sake."

"'Not me,'" Sir Pentious shook his head. "'I have to go home and study."

"'Come on kid, it'll make you cool like me...'" Angel said. "The crack head.'"

"'The only cool thing here is to say no drugs,'" Sir Pentious said. "'Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to not have sexual intercourse before marriage!'" Sir Pentious announced proudly.

"Yes! Oh bravo, bravo!" Charlie exclaimed, standing up and clapping. "Wow, Pentious, at this rate you'll be redeemed in no time."

Y/N looked over at Angel, seeing a look on his face that she had never seen before on him.

"I...I'm going to bed."

"I am so proud of you, Sir Pentious." Charlie said while Angel walked off, ignoring him. "That was amazing!"

"Hey, Angel?" Y/N said, walking over to him. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah I..." he said, turning away from her. "I'm fine."

"Hey," she said, touching his arm. "Y'know if you need to talk, I'm always here."

"I said I'm fine Y/N," he snapped, jerking his arm away from her.

As Angel walked up the stairs, she couldn't help but feel sad.

"Everything okay, my dear?" a staticky voice asked.

"Yes, everything's fine,"

It was late at night.

Tossing and turning, Y/N couldn't sleep. Her mind was on a variety of things. The hotel, Angel Dust, Vox...

Alastor...

Deciding that sleep was no longer an option, Y/N got out of bed and started to walk around the hotel.

As she walked down the stairs, she heard voices.

"I hated that song! Why are you so lame?" came Nifty's voice. "Not a bad boy!"

Y/N laughed silently. She loved it when Nifty said the most out of pocket things.

"Good first day," said Charlie's voice. "Let's get some rest."

At the sound of footsteps, Y/N hid behind a pillar, not wanting them to see her. She knew they would ask questions.

When she knew they were gone, Y/N came out of her hiding spot, walking into the room that they all came out of.

Walking into the room, she saw the watch that Sir Pentious was wearing on the ground.

Somehow, she knew that this had something to do with Vox. No wonder Sir Pentious randomly showed up.

Smirking, she picked up the picked up the watch, turning it on.

Vox appeared on the watch screen.

"What!?" Vox's angry voice said.

"Hello there, Vox, missed me?" Y/N grinned seeing the surprised look on his face. "You're gonna have to try a lot harder than that next time, hun."

She laughed, hearing Vox scream out in rage. She dropped the watch and, crushing it with her boot.

She walked back to her room, laughing all the way.

Little did she know that a certain Radio Demon was in the shadows, watching her interaction with Vox, thinking to himself.

i am so excited for the new episodes of helluva boss

i hope they have striker

i want to get on my knees for that man so bad

stay safe and drink lots of water <33

xoxo, Izzy

Taglist 💋

@maksdust

@trippoverrt

@slytherin4ever

@lucifers-silhouette

@a-small-tyrant

@mo-0-o

@cutiebimbo

@mommymilkers0526

@mikariell95

@al-of-the-stars

@martinys-world

@bibliophile-yomna

@mysticwitchcraftco

[raineandsky]

The Villain's Housekeeper

(part 1) (part 2) (part 3) (part 4) (part 5) (part 6) (part 7) (part 8) (part 9) (part 10) (part 11)

tw: guns, death

“Just tell me,” the superhero spits, and the villain laughs in his face.

The hero is free. The hero is free, and nothing the superhero does to the villain can change that. The villain admitted too much whilst the superhero was listening in, and they’ve rectified it. The hero will never have to see him again, and the villain will die here to make sure of it. The superhero has nothing.

“You’re such a piece of shit,” he continues, as if this is a new and particularly heartbreaking insult. “Tell me where they went.”

“Out, I’d presume.” The villain’s face twists into a snarl. “Do you really think we laid out exact plans in the middle of a prison break?”

The door squeals open behind the superhero, and he whips to the entrance with a growl before remembering himself. “What?” is the nicest tone he can manage.

“You, uh,” the guard starts uncertainly. She doesn’t look particularly happy to be the one bringing him news. “You might want to come see our… visitors.”

And with a bark of orders and a step of raw fury, the superhero is gone. The villain is left with only silence for company.

The silence only lasts for a couple of minutes. Gunfire, far off. Running footsteps. The villain swallows nervously and twists their hands testily in their cuffs.

They were prepared to die to keep the hero safe. Kind of. They wouldn’t have liked it, and they’d probably have embarrassed themself by going out crying and begging for mercy, but they would’ve died with the hero’s safety in their hands, and that’s all that would’ve mattered.

This, though. This isn’t the hero. A bullet plinks off the door loudly and the villain flinches. Gunfire sprays closer. They pull at the cuffs a little more desperately. Please, please, just break—

The door is flung open with a strong kick, smashing a hole into the opposite wall. A breath of a whimper escapes their mouth before they can think to stop it. They screw their eyes shut and wait for the feeling of the bullet searing through them. They’re trembling, but they can’t find it in their last moments to care.

There’s no feeling of metal tearing their flesh. No blinding flash of gunfire. Low voices exchange incoherent words. The villain doesn’t want to open their eyes in case the people here are cruelly waiting for them to face their killers. They can’t. They won’t.

Something touches their arm. They flinch a lot harder than they thought they could.

“[Villain],” says a familiar voice. Soft, worried. The touch on their arm solidifies into a gentle hand. “You’re safe now. You’re with us.”

The villain opens their eyes slowly, as if this is a trick they don’t trust. The hero throws them a lopsided smile, genuine and exhausted. This is definitely a trick. The hero isn’t stupid enough to come back.

That doesn’t mean the villain can take their eyes off them, though.

“Let’s get these cuffs off,” the hero continues after a moment. They set their gun on the table to root through their pocket.

“Yes, please get those things off,” says someone from the doorway. Also familiar, less tight than they recognise. “I would like to leave as soon as possible.”

The villain’s gaze snaps to the supervillain, lounging in the entrance with her own handgun pointed into the hallway beyond. The slightest hint of a smile sits at her lips, something the villain hasn’t seen in years.

The hero jabs the end of a knife into the villain’s cuffs, earning a second startled flinch. “Sorry,” they say shortly as the cuffs click open. “I don’t have the key. We’re mostly improvising.”

“You’re telling me,” the supervillain says with a huff of a laugh, and once the villain is on their feet she’s off ahead of them into the corridor.

“Are you okay?” the hero asks as they swipe the gun from the table and set off after her. “Did that bastard… do anything to you?”

Of course he did. That seems to be the superhero’s thing. They don’t want the hero to worry about them any more than they already have, though. The idiot came back.

So they give them a smile that’s blatantly, tragically forced, and simply say, “Nah.”

The hero clearly doesn’t believe that but they’ve no time to question it. The two of them follow the supervillain into the corridor. Round a corner. Up a flight of stairs. The supervillain shoots someone and the top and the villain hates that they flinch at the noise.

The main doors are so close. The three of them waste no time running across the foyer. Something clatters to the floor and the hero yelps. The supervillain and the villain turn to find the superhero behind them, an arm around the hero’s throat and a gun to their temple.

“Now,” he says. His breath is short, panting. “Let’s not be stupid here, hm? Anyone tries anything and I’ll blow their head off.”

The supervillain hesitates. The villain’s stomach clenches with familiar fear. 

The superhero smiles, blood soaked into his teeth and staining his lips. “We’re all going to be good people and allow the law to win, aren’t we?”

The hero wriggles in vain in his grip. “[Superhero], please, you’re not—”

“Shut up,” the superhero spits. “I made you. You really think you’re better than me? You gave criminals information on us, you traitor.”

His grip on them tightens, delighting in the choked gasp that tears from their throat. He’s distracted. 

The villain lurches for the supervillain, earning a surprised yelp and snatching the superhero’s attention. He turns his barrel on them but it doesn’t matter. The villain tucks the supervillain’s gun under their own chin.

“Let go of them,” they say fiercely, “or I swear to god I’ll fucking kill myself.”

The hero’s eyes are wide with horror. “[Villain], no—”

The superhero’s grip on them stops them. His own face is contorted like he’s nothing more than vaguely pissed off. “What do you think you’re doing?”

The villain’s hand is shaking. They can feel that this thing is loaded. Their finger is hovering precariously close to the trigger. “You need me,” they say like it’s obvious. “If I die, you’ll never figure out what all my paperwork says. I’ll die with all that information and you can’t do shit about it.”

The superhero scowls, kind of. It's a much more enraged expression than the villain can put a word to. His gaze flits obviously to the supervillain. “She won’t tell you shit,” the villain continues. “Less than I would, in fact.”

The superhero’s arm loosens slightly on the hero, the reality of his predicament clearly catching up to him. The hero is only looking more grieved by the second.

The villain meets their eye. They let their gaze flick down, hoping to convey a semblance of a plan, to the hero’s abandoned gun on the floor. Back up. The hero’s own gaze follows theirs, almost subdued, and nods ever-so-slightly.

Everything happens so fast. The villain tips their gun down to the superhero. He doesn’t have time to react before they set it off with a deafening clap. He shrieks as the bullet buries into his thigh. His grip on the hero loosens and they burst free from his hold. They scoop their own gun from the floor, kicking the superhero’s out of his hand. 

The supervillain leaps forward to grab the superhero's gun before he can think to snatch it back, and suddenly he’s defenceless, surrounded by three armed people who hate him more than anything in the world.

No one needs to speak to know what the plan is. The superhero’s gaze snaps up at the loud click of a magazine disappearing into the hero’s gun.

A laugh bubbles out of his throat, the sound choked on fear. “[Hero], come on,” he says softly. “You’re not a killer. You’re better than that. You’re better than them.”

The hero glances to the them they’re supposedly better than—the supervillain, paralyzed by fear, scared for herself for also for her own; she who had leapt to her feet when the hero came to her with a way to fix things. She who grieved the whole way here that she couldn’t have saved more of those she cared about so much.

And the villain. The villain, who’d had a perfect opportunity to make themself something to the supervillain and let their humanity win. Who’d let the hero stay as a cruel joke and let them leave as a survivor. Who’d threatened their own life for the hero despite their terror of what lays on the other side.

The hero is no better than them. They don’t want to be.

The gun angles at the superhero in their hands. Defeat doesn’t even seem to cross his mind. Only painfully familiar frustration. “[Hero],” he says a little harsher. “Look at what they’ve made you into. You can be so much more than this.”

The hero sets their jaw and tilts their head up defiantly. “I don't want to be anything more.”

The gunshot rings in their ears. None of them have time to watch the superhero even drop to the floor. No time to mourn—no grace to even think about him. The hero is thankful for that as they burst through the front doors and into freedom. Freedom, freedom, freedom.

The supervillain, free to really grieve her losses. A new superhero will be put in his place, of course, but she can gather the villains around her and rebuild everything she’s lost.

The villain, free of the bindings of the superhero’s torture. Without the supervillain's fears hanging over them. Without their own.

And the hero. Free to live without their puppeteer tugging the strings. Finally free to live.

(last part!)

Taglist:

@runarelle @thiefofthecrowns @morning-star-whump @epiclamer @tekanparadiae @yourslimeologist @greengrassandflowers @subval01

[artists-ally]

{Flatline} Harvey x OFC {Pt. 3)

Uh ohhhh guys it’s Pt. 3 🤭🤭🤭 I am so excited for this. It’s honestly one of my favorite things I’ve written and I hope you all agree. There is a poll at the end so make sure to vote for that <3 enjooyyyyy p.s. I hope this does good justice for this series.

Pt. 1 Pt. 2 Character Playlist

Word Count: 12,795

Warnings: language, angst, anxious thoughts, one singular mention of sexual h*r*ssm*nt in regards to Harvey’s actions with Claudia, smut 18+, the tiniest bit of food play, dom/sub dynamics, praise kink go brrr

***Italic sections indicate flashbacks***

Summary: The aftermath of Harvey breaking his promise to Claudia.

Tagging: @rosedpetal @maxdamax @ashcosmo

~~~~~~

HARVEY'S POV

My legs were numb. That sort of numbness when something happens that you can’t explain. It felt like my life just flashed before my eyes. That image of Claudia’s shaking lip… hearing her broken voice… I don’t think I’ll ever get it out of my fucking head. 

“Harvey, I requested those trades be made an hour ago. Do you wanna tell me why… Harvey?”

I could see Jessica in front of me, but I couldn’t hear a damn thing she said. 

“Harvey, what’s going on?” She closed the door, and I put a hand out to steady myself so I wouldn’t fall on the floor. “What happened?” “I fucked up,” I whispered. 

“Yeah, no shit. You tanked our only opportunity to get a leg up on this Gustoson case. You’re damn right you fucked up-”

“No no,” I sat on the arm of the chair. My hands began to shake so I folded them together. Jessica saw. 

“What the hell did you do?”

“I yelled at Claudia…”

She just blinked at me. “Is that seriously what you’re concerned about? Yelling at an associate? Okay, you yelled at an associate, what’s new? That might as well be in your job description.”

“No no no I didn’t just yell at her I threatened to do the one thing that I promised I would never do and now she’s gone. She left. I can’t- I don’t- I never meant to hurt her but she suggested that we file a motion to dismiss and I got so caught up in my anger about her accusing me of using her that I lost my-”

“Using her? Harvey, what is going on?” “I’ll tell you what’s going on,” Donna barged in. 

“Donna please don’t-”

“Harvey and Claudia have been ‘working together’ for the last month and a half, when in reality he has been a selfish, lying, arrogant brat who has crossed so many lines it’s beginning to look like a Rorschach Test.”

“You know?” I felt my heart suffocate myself. I thought I was gonna throw up.

“In all honesty Harvey, no I didn’t. Not until Claudia just broke down in the elevator and told me everything. I cannot believe that you would use her like that. For your own personal satisfaction are you out of your fucking mind?” “Harvey, what the hell is she talking about?” Jessica’s voice was full of hostility. 

“He thought that it would be a good idea to boost Claudia’s confidence by getting into her pants.”

“Donna it wasn’t-”

Jessica scoffed, covering her face. “What the hell is wrong with you? This has got sexual harassment written all over it, Havrey. Could you really be that delusional?”

“For fucks sake it wasn’t like that!” I screamed. Genuinely screamed and paced around. “I didn’t use her, not intentionally. God dammit I haven't been able to think clearly since the first day that I saw Claudia. She is an incredible lawyer and all I wanted to do was give her something else to focus on because she was afraid to be in a room with me. I just- all I wanted to do was help her find a little bit of confidence and oh my god this sounds so much worse when I say it outloud.”

Donna and Jessica exchanged a look while I slowly felt like my heart was being ripped out of my chest and stomped on the floor with cleats. 

“Okay Harvey, sit down and tell us what happened,” Donna steered me away from putting a hole in the wall to my desk.

“I don’t even know, Donna.” “Well while you two enjoy going down memory lane, I’ll be fighting for our firm's life. If you two don’t get your shit together, and by you two I mean Harvey, then… I don’t even know then.”

She all but slammed the door on her way out, patrons on the other side sending worried glances our way. I turned my chair so they wouldn’t see me. 

“How long has this been going on?” Donna asked. 

I dug my nails into my skin. “Almost two months.”

“Two months? Harvey, how could you not tell me?” “Because I didn’t want to,” I admitted. “And partly because I kind of thought you already knew. You know, the whole ‘Donna superpower’ shit you do.”

“I know I can’t believe I missed it,” she took the chair in front of me. I glared at her so hard I thought I’d light that hair of hers on fire. “Okay bad time for a joke. So, bachelor, why don’t you start from the beginning. And please, I don’t need to know the dirty details, despite my curiosity. Claudia is like a little sister to me and I really don’t want to picture you and her and oh my god I already am. Ugh, please start talking so I don’t have to be tortured.”

So dramatic. I was good looking, and so was Claudia. Why wouldn’t anyone want to picture us together? Then my eyes snapped to the chair she was sitting on. Oh god. Donna was in the chair that I was the first time Claudia and I-

“Get up,” I blurted out, reaching for her and placing her in my desk chair. God dammit we used that one too. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.

We sat down on the couch and I rubbed my strained eyes. Here goes nothing. 

“When Sheila first sent over the recruits from Harvard, I interviewed all of them. Except for one. There were thirteen associates but I only had twelve meetings set up. So I asked Louis if he was interviewing any of the newbies and he said just one. Obviously this person was some sort of idiot to be going to Louis instead of me, so I popped in.”

“Well, Claudia I think that you have some unbelievable potential at this firm and I’d just like to- Harvey, what are you doing here I am in the middle of an interview.”

“Oh I know, I just wanted to drop by and see how it was going.”

In front of Louis was this warm, chestnut brown head of sleek, silk like hair. She was wearing a lavender blouse and a black maxi skirt with a slit to the knee. She had on these black flats with pearls on them. Summer had just ended, and there was some remaining sunburn on her nose and cheeks. Her eyes were surrounded by prominent lashes and eyebrows, a fine line of makeup between the two; lavender, to match the top. 

“It’s going great, now will you get the hell out and tend to your own interviews and stop barging in on my only one?”

“Harvey Specter,” I introduced, sticking out my hand. She looked from it over to Louis, who was just shooting me daggers. 

“You just can’t help yourself, can you?”“Louis, I’m not trying to woo your associate, I’m just introducing myself to her. We are kind of name partners, you know. It’s the courteous thing to do.”

Again, all she did was look at my hand before slowly standing up. I didn’t miss the way she tried to subtly wipe her hand on her skirt. 

“I’m Claudia. Claudia Martin.”

God dammit that was a pretty name. It sounded so sophisticated, so mature and would sound really nice next to mine. Or with mine. Harvey Specter and Claudia Martin. I don’t know why I thought of hearing or seeing ‘Claudia Specter’ one day, but I did. And I didn’t hate the way it sounded. 

“Welcome to Pearson Specter Litt,” I gave a nice smile. It was clear she was already intimidated to be here, I didn’t need to add to that fire. She barely looked me in the eye for two seconds, but those two seconds made my head spin. 

She had the most gorgeous eyes I think I’ve ever seen in my life. They were amber in the middle but had this ring of hazel around the outer rim. It was just… not something I’ve ever seen before. I didn’t want her to look away because I just wanted to keep looking at them.

And that blush… that I knew wasn’t her sunburn. Not the way it creeped up the side of her face, or at the base of her neck. 

Jesus Harvey, stop staring at her. You’re probably giving off major stalker vibes.

“Well I’ll be around if you need anything, Claudia. Don’t be shy,” I smiled, the best charming one I could. Her full lips were in a tight line, her fingers picking at each other before she sat back down with Louis.

“Okay so you sabotaged Louis’ meeting with Claudia and thought she was beautiful? Why didn’t you just say that?” Donna interrupted. 

“Didn’t you ask me to start from the beginning?” She snapped her lips closed. “So let me tell the goddamn story. Yes, I thought she was stunning. I mean, no one in their right mind would think otherwise. She is so pretty and so smart and twice the person I wish I could be. There is just something about her that I can’t shake from my memory.”

“Yeah we get it, you’re head over heels for Claudia. Now on with it I don’t have all day.”

I rolled my eyes. 

“That was the first time I met her. It wasn’t long after that she started working here when I talked to her again. She was just sitting at her desk, Griffin and whoever else crowded around the opposite end of the bullpen. She was excluded and it made me feel bad.”

I’ve always thought Griffin would be at the top of my list for top associates. He was like me; only shorter, not as good looking, and had blue eyes instead of brown. Did I mention he wasn’t as good looking? Anyway, I had only one intention: get Claudia alone so I could talk to her.

Every day since she started a few weeks ago, I have watched her get off the elevator, walk through the office, and disappear around the corner. It wasn’t fair that she got to look like that, walk like that, and no one was around to appreciate it. 

She was so fucking eye catching. And I didn’t want the other slobs at this firm to get to her before I could.

“Claudia, do you mind helping me with something for a few minutes?” I asked, voice just loud enough for Griffin to hear. 

She looked up, pen cap between her rosy lips, and blinked. That flush creeped onto her cheeks. I tried not to smile. 

“Sure,” she nodded once and stood up, following me out. 

I was not so subtle with the look that I gave Griffin, and he wasn’t so subtle with the way he spoke.

“Is there something you need, Harvey? Claudia is in the middle of a very important depo documentation. I’d hate for her to fall behind.”

What a dick. “No, Griffin. It seems like you’ve got more important things to do with your book club than working on whatever Louis assigned you, so Claudia will work just fine. I prefer an actually hard working associate to someone who’s discussing whatever mediocre steak dinner you had at Texas Roadhouse last Wednesday.”

“Griffin’s eyes simmered and shot daggers into Claudia. But he didn’t open his mouth. I thought about punching him in the face for looking at her like that, and that’s when I realized I was fucked. That I was willing to do that for Claudia when it was literally the second time I’ve ever talked to her.”

“I’ll say,” Donna huffed. “What happened next?” “I just had her deliver some letters for me to the courthouse. I asked her something about Griffin, if they were ever acquainted with each other.”

“And what did she say?”

“She told me that Griffin was a total douchebag and tried to use his social status to get a leg up on her in class discussions, cutting corners to discredit her. It was so unfair and I just-”

Donna put a hand on my knee. “Relax, Harvey. Griffin isn’t here, stop looking like you want to put him through a wall.” “Well, Donna, I do want to put him through a wall because he has been an asshole to Claudia for no other reason than she was good at her job. It makes me sick.”

“When did you start becoming so protective of her? I’ve never seen you like this with anyone other than Mike, Louis, Jessica and myself. You must… really really care about her.”

“I think it was during the mock trial. She was always off to the side, always attentive, but never spoke up. I couldn’t stop myself from glancing over at her every once and a while to see if she wanted to be included. But she never did.”

“This case may seem simple, but the husband is a grade A asshole. He has done everything to cover his tracks and is gonna come at us with everything he’s got. Find me some evidence and make it good.”

They all branched off, heading this way and that. Claudia went to the only logical place, right to me.

“Hi, Mr. Specter-sir. I just have one question about-about the case if you’ve got a minute. If you have somewhere to be I understand and I can ask later,” she said quickly.

“Of course, what do you want to know?” I couldn’t help but think her stuttering was cute. I knew she was nervous, specifically around me; she always seemed so tense with me, so I made sure to always speak quietly and calmly with her. 

“Was Mr. Saros the one who paid off that investment banker? Did the money come from his account directly or a different one?”

God she was so good. “It came from him and his wife’s joint account.”

Claudia had a slight grin to her lips, and she nodded before striding away. She was going to crack this wide open. I just knew it. 

I went back to my office to wait it out, to see if any one could come up with an idea before Claudia. Before I knew it, it was three o'clock and I had a meeting to go to for another case Mike and I were working on. When we got in the car, Mike was looking at me with a knowing smile. 

“What?” 

He shook his head, “Nothing, just wondering how long you’re going to pretend you’re not in love with Claudia Martin.”

“The first year associate?”

“Don’t pretend you don’t know who she is. I see you watch her like a starving animal every time she comes into the office. And every time she leaves. And every time she asks Donna something.”

Uh oh.

“Oh please, I have far better things to do than get involved with a first year.”

“You didn’t deny that you were in love with her.”

“Do you want to get smacked? Or I could kick you out of this car at sixty miles per hour, see how you like the taste of asphalt.” Mike did not know when to stop pushing my buttons. 

“I think you just proved my theory.”

“What theory?”

“That you are in love and you are incredibly protective of Claudia. I heard about what you said to Griffin when he offered his help because Claudia was ‘too busy’. You know he pawned that work off to her, right?”

My eyes narrowed and my jaw clenched, as well as my fists. I fixed my gaze out the window and took some deep breaths. Jesus… he had a point. A huge point. God dammit I’m in trouble.

“Mike knew before I did?” Donna sounded mildly offended. 

“Well, not really. I never told him what we were doing. But I did tell him that I liked her. And when he told me that Griffin was pawning off his work to Caudia it sent me into a spiral. Shit, Donna… I am in so deep with Claudia. I really fucked up. I mean really bad. I made a promise to her that I wouldn’t treat her like the other associates because she wasn’t like the other associates. She was Claudia. And Claudia was- is- so much better than the rest of them.” “Why would you make a promise like that if you knew you wouldn’t be able to keep it?” “I had every intention of keeping it, but then all the shit with started happening when Louis found out about Mike being a fraud and he took that fucking case with Gerard and I couldn’t hold it together.” “Why did you even make it in the first place?” Donna asked, but I really didn’t want to tell this story.

I sighed, the type of sigh that fills your whole body.

“I was going off on Griffin one day, for being an asshole to some of the other associates, about pawning off his work to Claudia and she saw.”

“Griffin, I don’t care whose idea it was. You were the one to destroy his work, so you’re going to face the consequences.”

“It was just a prank, the entire document wasn’t supposed to be deleted.”

“You think tampering with another associate’s work is a prank? I hope when you go home tonight you think long and hard about who you wanna be as a man because as of right now, there isn’t going to be anything for you to come back to tomorrow. And you better pray to whatever you believe in because if there’s one person you don’t want to make an enemy out of, it’s me. Do you understand that?”

He clenched his jax, shoving his hands in his pockets. “yes.”

“You are going to be Louis’ personal associate.”“No, no way you can make me work for that man. He’s a total airhead.”“Yes, he is, now you two have something to talk about. You can bond over your selfish, outrageous egotistical behavior, it’ll be just like looking in a mirror.”

“Harvey I’m-”

“I don’t care what you are Griffin. You have no right to treat the other associates like that, especially Claudia. If I ever catch wind of you throwing your work load on her again so help me God I will make sure it is the last thing you do at this firm.”

If my point wasn’t clear enough by my words, the look I gave him would certainly do. He left my office without another word and I followed his movements all the way. But my eyes met Claudia’s. And they were wide and panicked. She quickly scurried away, head down and steps fast. She looked so afraid. 

She wasn’t afraid of me was she? I mean, all I had done was rip Griffin a new one for being an asshole. And he deserved it, Claudia would never do something to deserve that kind of lashing. 

“And so I promised her. I fucking promised her that I would never flip out on her and then I went and did exactly. God Donna… I am so fucked up.”

Her slim hand rubbed up and down my shoulder, but I only wanted it to be Claudia’s. I wanted her right next to me so I could go through all of this with her and explain that it wasn’t just some fling. Not to me. Never to me. I never wanted it to be temporary, she was… she’s it for me. 

The familiar prick crept into my eyes, my nose, and the tears fell. Donna has only seen me cry a handful of times, but never over a girl.

But Claudia wasn’t just some girl. She wasn’t just some hookup or some prize to be won. She was Claudia Martin. My Claudia. The quiet, shy first year associate I had worked so hard to get out of her shell. It wasn’t just for my pleasure, I truly didn’t want to see her fall behind just because she couldn’t ask me a question.

I saw that look in her eye; hunger and determination. Just like mine. I wanted it to shine brighter than her smile. Which was equally as devastating as her work in the courtroom. But I just wanted her to feel comfortable around me and I didn’t know what else to do. She was like a frightened baby deer around me. A constant nervous wreck at the drop of my name. I didn’t want her to be afraid of me, I wanted nothing more than to be a safe space for her. 

And maybe it’s just because I’m an idiot, but I’m realizing now that maybe I’m the one who needed the safe place. To just have someone to go to all the time. To share all of my proud moments and sneak little kisses and touches here and there. 

I need Claudia. I need her.

Maybe I took it too far. Started at the wrong place. I should’ve offered to take her out to dinner instead of inviting her up for a drink in my office after her first case. I shouldn’t have done it so backwards, and it kills me that I’m only drawing that connection now. Why couldn’t I have thought of that earlier? She would’ve been so much better off without all the backwards, fucked up shit that I did.

But it was so nice. To finally have the one thing I have been craving for so long. She was so soft, and she was so sweet under my touch and I couldn’t help myself. As soon as I first kissed her it was end game. I didn’t want to kiss anyone else. I wouldn’t ever kiss anyone again, not the way I kissed Claudia. More than lust. More than just a desire. 

Her lips on mine made my head go blank. I had an awful habit of having work thoughts creep their way into my head every once in a while. But never with her. Even when we were only talking about work, I couldn’t think about it. I only thought about her. About how brilliant she was, about how soft and warm and perfect her lips were on mine. About how she always made me feel at ease and comforted. I doubt she could ever make anyone afraid. Except maybe an opposing counsel. 

If I ever had to face her in court… I know I’d lose. For one, I’d give her anything she wanted simply because she could put me on my knees with a single look. And normally I’d hate to let a woman have that much control over me, but for Claudia… I’d let her do whatever she wanted. And Second, she knows what to do. All the time. She never misses a beat, and is always listening. Even when you think she isn’t.

I am so in love with Claudia. I felt my heart crack open. My voice more or less does the same. 

“Harvey…” “I am in love with her, Donna. And I think I have been for a long time.”

She was quiet, and a throat cleared. Mike was there in front of me, his hands in his pockets, a look of worry on his face. “Is everything alright?”

I saw Donna shake her head out of the corner of my eye. She didn’t say anything, but I knew she wanted to. 

“I broke my promise to Claudia.” That was all I said. I heard his sharp inhale, and he came and sat in front of us. “God dammit Mike… I really messed up. I hurt the one person I couldn’t afford to and- and I don’t know what to do.”

“Go talk to her,” Mike said. “If you’re serious about how you feel about Claudia, then you need to go tell her that it was never… whatever you were doing before. She has anxiety, Harvey. She is going to let her brain tell her things about you that aren’t true. And you need to be there to soothe the fire before it does irreversible damage.” “Well, what do you and Rachel do when you get into an argument?” 

“Harvey,” Donna said, “You aren’t Mike, and Claudia isn’t Rachel. Whatever they do might not work for you. You need to do what feels right for you and your relationship.” “I don’t know if you know this Donna, but I haven’t done something like this before. I don’t know how to talk to her. How to not make her anxious around me.” “We’ll help you,” Mike nods, as well as Donna. “We can come up with a plan but right now we’ve got a bigger problem on our hands.” What could be more devastating than hurting Claudia? 

Nothing. The answer was nothing.

____

CLAUDIA’S POV

I toed off my shoes, leaving them in the growing pile by my front door. I sighed at it. Why couldn’t they just put themselves away? 

My splitting headache was doing nothing to help either. 

Before I could even get a thought about what I could cook for dinner, the doorbell rang. I swear to god if Greg was here asking me about those flowers on my wreath again I was going to smack him with it, throw it over his head and shove him back inside his apartment and-

“Claudia, it’s Mike. I know you’re here, can we talk?”

Mike? What the hell is he doing here? 

I seriously debated giving my best housekeeper impression and deadbolting the door. But it was Mike, and he hadn’t done anything to deserve a cold shoulder. Oh god, what if Harvey was with him and I was getting set up? Oh shit.

“No, Harvey isn’t with me. I promise.”

I stalked to the door, pulling it open and glaring up at Mike. “The last time someone made me a promise I regretted it.” He just pressed his lips in a flat line. “What are you doing here, Mike?”

“I’m here on behalf of Harvey.” “Why?” “Because he’s worried about you.” Why is he worried about me? He made it very clear he didn’t give a shit about me. “He’s beating himself up over what he did.”

“Good,” that I didn’t restrain. 

“Claudia, he is really shaken up right now. He didn’t mean to do what he did. Now, I’m not going to stand here and pretend I know all the details about what he did but-” “He used me, Mike. Plain and simple.” All I got was a raised eyebrow. “He told me he wanted to ‘build my confidence’ which I was actually naive enough to believe, and it led to my worst fucking nightmare. But he just got what he wanted, to get his dick wet and then was done with me.”

“Claudia, trust me, it wasn’t like that. Harvey would never use you like that. He wouldn’t dream of it, trust me.”

“Are you sure because it seems like that’s exactly what he did. He saw that I was hard working, manipulated me into working with him, and treated me like shit when I was just trying to find a solution to his goddamn problem. I have more self respect than that. To let him continue to get away with that.”

“Can I ask what he did?”

My throat closed, and my palms began to sweat. I knew my annoying blush was there by the way his eyes dipped to my neck. 

“After I won my first case with him, he invited me up to his office for some drinks. Said something along the lines of wanting to get to know each other so I didn’t have to feel so nervous. So I went up, and one thing led to another and… I don’t know why I let it happen. I knew it would end badly. I can’t believe I let myself believe that he would be into me beyond anything other than his pure primal satisfaction. But he seemed so genuine and so caring. Like he genuinely wanted to help me, and some part of me obviously thought it was a good idea because it happened again. And again. And again. God, I sound like the biggest loser right now.” “No you don’t,” Mike gave me a soft smile. “If it means anything, those feelings weren’t one sided. I know it doesn’t mean much of anything coming from me but… Harvey is really really fucking sorry about what he did.”

I was physically shaking. Through my trembles, I managed to speak, despite my thoughts trying to shut me down. “It hurt so bad, Mike. I really like Harvey, and I thought he might feel the same way. I guess I was wrong. So… so wrong.”

“No, Claudia you’re not wrong. Harvey is a grade A asshole but he wouldn’t-”

“If there is any chance of Harvey sorting this out, you need to tell him to grow a set and tell me himself,” I have no idea where this confidence came from. “He needs to stop getting other people to do his job for him. If he can’t recognize that now, of all times, then… then I don’t think he deserves me.”

Mike blinked long, rubbing his fingers over his mouth. “Harvey didn’t ask me to come here.” “What?” What? 

“Yeah,” he sighed. “I knew Harvey wouldn’t come tonight. I’m not sure he’ll come at all but… Claudia, he talks about you like I’ve never seen him talk before. He gushes over you to the point where it’s annoying. And when I went to go and talk to him about what our next move was for this case… Claudia, he was crying. He was sobbing with Donna in his office and-”

Good, I wanted to say. But it kind of crushed my soul. Harvey was crying over what he did to me. 

“I’ve never seen him cry before,” Mike looked hurt, too. “He regrets what he said. I know he does.”

“I believe you.”

“Good,” he nods. “I don’t want to do his job for him and I think-”

“But that doesn’t mean I will forgive him for what he said,” and with that, I closed the door, locking it for the night.

_____

Saturday and Sunday were so agonizing. The last thing I wanted to do was go into an office after a weekend of anything but rest and relaxation. I was tired and hadn’t showered and needed some restful sleep. Not to be woken up three times a night by dreams of Harvey touching me. Those certainly didn’t help. 

My mind kept replaying our first time together. Specifically when he said 'Oh, Claudia, you really are that innocent, aren’t you?’ Innocent and naive… just like he said that night. Who was I to think that Harvey would take any interest in me besides the fact that I was good at being a lawyer? I wasn’t special in any way, I think he just knew that I was easy to manipulate into doing what he needed. 

There was no way in hell I’d ever do another thing for Havrey, the all powerful jackass, Specter again.

As I set my stuff on my desk, Griffin walked up. Great. Just great, what did this prick want?

“Hey umm… Hi Claudia,” he rubbed the back of his head. “I just- I’m sorry. About all the things I’ve done to you. You didn’t deserve it and I want you to know that you have always been six-times the lawyer I wish I could be. I was jealous and took it out on you. And I shouldn’t have so… I’m sorry.”

Did I just hear that right? Did Griffin Harper just apologize to me? What the fuck is going on?

“Oh,” great way to start, idiot. “Thank you, Griffin.”

He just gave me a short nod before scurrying away. Well, that was… unexpected. Certainly I couldn’t ever let us be friends, but it was nice to know he wasn’t my mortal enemy any longer. 

I went about my business, plagued with thoughts and reminders of Harvey ever which way I went. Louis and Jessica sent me an email with some files to print out so I scanned them, proofed them, and sent them to the printing room. 

God it sent a shiver down my spine to be back in here after he… don’t finish the thought don’t finish the thought-

“Hey, Claudia,” Donna snapped me out of my heated thoughts. “How are you?” “You can cut the bullshit now, Donna.”

She sighed, “it was a genuine question.” “And that was a genuine answer. I’m not in the mood.”

“Claudia-” “No, Donna. What Harvey did wasn’t okay, and I’m not going to stand here and pretend like what he did didn't hurt. Because it did and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it ever since. I don’t need you here to remind me.”

“Have you ever considered that Harvey may want to fix it?”

“No, Donna. I haven’t. And I’m not going to,” I stood my ground, squaring off my freshly printed papers before making more copies for Louis. 

“What are you talking about?”

I scoffed. “Do you really think that I wouldn’t figure out what was going on?” “Again, what are you-” “I know Harvey just thinks that I am gullible and naive and easy to push around because he makes me nervous. And it’s true. Whenever I am near him I can’t keep myself composed and I’m sick and tired of being walked all over. I can’t believe I was stupid enough to let myself see otherwise, but I’m even more upset that you didn’t come clean and tell me.” “Claudia, no one is walking over you. And I didn’t know about any of this until you told me on Friday. Harvey came to you because he knew can rely on you and your abilities to get things accomplished. He wanted the chance to work with you and get you to trust him a little. You have to know that by now,” Donna was standing right next to me, blocking my way out. 

“Maybe I do, but that doesn’t mean that I believe it. Donna, I am not some corporate power house that is gonna bring firms to their knees. Not like he does.” “Nobody does what Harvey does.” “And that’s my point,” I grit my teeth. “Harvey was trying to make me into a mini version of him, just like he did with Mike and it’s not what I want to be. Donna, I am not assertive. I am not reckless and willing to go behind peoples backs to get the job done. I like rules and regulations and the law. They are there so people abide by them, and Harvey, more often than not, doesn’t do that. Yes, I look up to him as a role model because I admire his tenacity. But that doesn’t mean I like or agree with the things he does.”

“And you think that I like it when he goes and cuts someone’s legs out from under them?”

“I didn’t say that. But that means you know how I feel. I can’t- I don’t… I don’t want to be around someone like that. It makes me feel like I’m suffocating. And worst of all he gave me his word that he wouldn’t lash out and treat me like the other associates. I cant believe that I was stupid enough to believe that Harvey would-“

Both of us stopped as someone pushed through the door. 

Harvey…

“Donna,” Harvey’s mouth was pressed in a flat line. He jerked his head over his shoulder. Donna gave me a sympathetic look and turned on her heel. Where was she going?

“Wait, Donna don’t-” I whispered.

“You’ll be fine,” she gave me a firm look, patting my shoulder as she walked around Harvey. Oh my god… she set me up.

My heart felt like it was ripping out of my fucking chest. The last thing I needed right now was to be in an enclosed space with Harvey.

He stared at me, fussing with the cufflink on his shirt. “Claudia.” “I’m sorry, Mr. Specter, but I have to get these to Louis.” I tried to go around him, like Donna had, but he just let his body fall against the wall. Blocking the way. I couldn’t bring myself to look up at him and ask him to let me go. 

“I want you to listen to me.” His voice was stern, in a demanding way, but not in a pissed off way. 

“No, I am in a rush. Now if you’ll excuse me-”

“No,” he said with a shake of his head. “Come on, Claudia. Please just talk to me. I tried to call you but you didn’t answer and-.”

“I know, but I don’t want to talk to you. I want you to get out of my way so I can go do my job.” 

“A little feisty today, aren’t we?” He pushed off his shoulder, taking a step towards me, I took one back. And another as he took one. 

“No, I need to-” “Get those copies to Louis, I heard you,” Harvey acknowledged, but didn’t stop walking closer to me. My back eventually hit a copier and I almost fell over, but Harveys arms came to either side of my body, blocking me in. “And I don’t care.”

His face was inches from mine, chest inches from mine. I felt desperate for a breath. I forgot how to think, how to appear unphased. Everything he’s taught me has vanished from my mind. His eyes, much darker in this low over-head light, seemed to pierce my soul. 

“What… What are you doing?” My voice was barely audible. 

“I want you to know that I wouldn’t ever, ever, take advantage of you like that. I can’t even believe that you would think that. You think I enjoy making you a nervous wreck? Well, I don’t. It honestly makes me sick that even after all this time, you can’t trust me.”

“It’s not that I don’t trust you.”

“Then what is it? Because clearly I am not understanding,” his tone deepened, voice scratching in his throat. 

I couldn’t- I didn’t know how to admit to him-

“I- I umm… Mr. Specter I can’t-”

“Stop calling me that, please, Claudia. Stop seeing me as your boss for one second and see me as literally anything else.”

I swallowed. Nothing went down. “Harvey… you are… you scare me more than anyone else I’ve ever met.” “Why?” his brows knit together. “What is it about me that makes you so afraid of me?”

“Everything.” I was shaking, visibly shaking in front of him. I looked anywhere but his eyes because I knew if I did I’d crack open and bleed my heart all over him. 

His exhale was sharp enough to rustle the small hairs framing my face. “Claudia just-”

“I can’t be around you without feeling like I’m gonna drown in your presence.” 

He was stunned silent for a beat too long. “What is that supposed to mean?”

“Harvey I told you I didn’t want to-”

“Please, Claudia, tell me why you are so afraid of me.” He was begging. Begging for me to explain.

“Because I know that if I let myself think for one fucking second that you actually like working with me I’ll drop my guard around you. And I cannot afford to do that because there are things I keep locked inside that I would rather take to my grave than ever let someone know.”

“And what, you don’t think I’m equally as terrified to have these feelings for you?” “Not like mine.” Harvey gave me a very concerned glance. “There, you asked me to tell you. Please just let me go.”

“No, not until you tell me what is haunting you so much you’re willing to let it eat you alive rather than just let it out for once in your life. Look, I get that you’re a private person, and it’s hard for you to trust people, but that doesn’t mean you need to keep everything bottled inside and let it rot you from the inside out-”

“For the love of guard Harvey it’s you,” I shouted, far louder than I meant to. “It is you that is driving me insane. I cannot go a single moment of my day without thinking about you. I am terrified that you are going to see right through me and figure out that every thought that goes on inside my head has to do with you because for some reason, known only by some sick and twisted higher power, I want you to see me the way I see you. I want you to want me as much as I want you and-”

I stopped because I ran out of air. And then it hit me so hard I saw stars. What the fuck have I just done? My vision began to black out, my heart beating too fast for my lungs to keep up with. 

Harvey had backed up a step, mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water. 

I was going to throw up, I was sure of it. I tried to speak, but my mind had melted and oozed out of my ears. 

I ran, I left the copies on the floor; at some point I dropped them. And ran. His hand caught my elbow and I shrieked, whipping around just as Harvey slammed the door closed, pinning me, yet again. 

“You do not get to drop that ball and run away,” his voice had a darkness I’ve never heard. “Claudia, in what way do you want me?”

Frozen. My mind was utterly dysfunctional and useless. I couldn’t think, I’m surprised I remembered how to breathe. God his eyes…

“Claudia, please answer me.” Now his voice was tender, filled with warmth. His fingers tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear. “You have to tell me in what way now or I’m… you have to tell me.”

“Why does it matter? I've already ruined everything I’ve had going for me.” I was meek with my words. Wimpy. Cowardice. 

“Because it matters to me.”

“I want you, I want Harvey.”

“As in you want me, and not as your boss, Claudia?” He clarified. I had to shut my eyes, to turn my cheek to him so I wouldn’t see his reaction when I nodded in confirmation. “Fucking hell…”

“I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry. Just… just let me go and I can hand Jessica my letter of resignation right now and you never have to see me again-”

“Are you out of your mind?” Harvey’s caramel eyes were wide. “Claudia, I don’t want you to go. Not for one fucking second. Why do you even have a letter drafted?”

“But I just-” 

His fingers gripped my chin, forcing me to look up at him when I spoke. God dammit… Harvey’s thump caressed my lip, pulling it down and watching it spring up. Slowly, ever so slowly, he dipped it inside my mouth. I couldn’t help the soft noise that startled out of me. 

“Claudia… you have no idea how much I have been praying to hear you say those words. I have been driving myself out of my mind with what to say. How to say it and I- I don’t know how to tell you everything I’ve been wanting to. For weeks now.

“I have been thinking of you nonstop. I keep making up excuses and things to come see you during the day. I want nothing more than to get the chance to treat you right, and I want you to want it too. I promised myself I wouldn’t make a move unless you made one first because I knew how petrified you were of me. I can’t- I won’t have you be afraid of me if we do this.

“But I fucked up. I got ahead of myself and I didn’t go in the direction that I should've. I should've just asked you out to dinner, been a true gentleman rather than selfish. You have no idea how long I have been practicing what to say. I just made everything so much worse. And I wish like hell I could take it all back and do it all again because I am so so so fucking sorry for breaking my promise.”

I stared up at him, at the tears spilling over his lashes, and the flush on his cheeks. His lip quivered. He looked so vulnerable. So open and honest. Every part of me wanted to take it to heart, but that voice in the back of my head was telling me not to believe it.

“Harvey I-”

“Please, Claudia,” Harvey knelt to the ground, sitting back on his heels. “I will do whatever you want to gain your trust back. Anything… anything. But I can’t let you walk away from me. I want a real chance to make you happy, to give you every part of me. I will do or say or answer whatever you want but please do not leave me. If you truly don’t want me, tell me, and we never have to talk again. I will make it like I was never here in the first place if you told me to, but I don't think you want that. And I don’t want it either.”

Harvey was on his knees. Begging me to open my heart up to him. 

“Please don’t make me regret this, Harvey…”

He let out a breath, and a smile accompanied the tears that fell down his face. He reached for my hand, and I let him grab it. His fingers were warm and smooth in mine, familiar and comforting as he gently tugged me towards him. 

“I'm so sorry, Claudia. I will regret nothing more than the words I said to you. But I want to fix it, I want to be better. Not just for you, but for myself. But you are what makes me want to be better. I need to learn to control myself and take a page out of my own book to make that happen.”

Harvey rested his head on my stomach, and I let my fingers thread through his spiky hair. 

“But I don’t want you to be afraid of me anymore. I can’t- I won’t let you be afraid to ask me a question. I want to be there for you, work related or not, but I can’t do it if you don’t meet me halfway. I do remember you making me a promise back, to not see me as a monster.”

My hand stopped, and he looked up. I wanted to agree, but I was still upset, and he must’ve seen that. 

“Okay, that was a bad time to bring that up.”

“Yup.” 

Harvey huffed a laugh, standing back up. His smile was sweet, his finger gentle as it swept some hair away from my face. 

“You are the most beautiful girl I have ever seen, Claudia Olivia Martin.”

“How did you find out my middle name?”

“Donna,” he smiled wider. I just rolled my eyes. “I don��t really know how to do any of this, so I asked her for some help. I knew I had to do it myself. I just didn’t really know where to start and she’s… well, she’s Donna.” “Yes, she is Donna,” I smiled up at him. “But it’s gonna take me more than that to convince me.”

“Oh I have like seven other things lined up and ready to go. If you'd like to hear them. First, you are the most stunning, breathtaking, gorgeous woman I have ever met in my life. Second, I admire every part of you. All your good habits, your bad, your anxious thoughts and brave approach to life. Because they all make you you. Three, I am the biggest fucking idiot. For starting all of this off wrong, for yelling at you. For leading you to believe that I just wanted to get in your pants.”

“You’re also an asshole. A bit of a coward and a bitch. Did I say that you were an asshole?”

“Okay okay,” he placed his hands on my hips and I let him, doing nothing to hide the giggle that bubbled out. “Yes, I am all of those things. And, for the record, I did want to get in your pants, just not that way.”

“Of course you did, who could resist all of this?” My heart sped up when he looked at me over, a huge grin spreading his cheeks wide and bright. 

“Looks like you’ve gained a little confidence, huh?”

“Well, I did have a not so awful teacher. That was before he betrayed me.” “Are you gonna stop rubbing salt into the wound?”

I faked a ponder, “Nope.”

“Claudia,” he pressed a tentative kiss to my cheek, then gauged my response before placing one on the other. “Olivia,” another kiss. “Martin.” He kissed my forehead, then the tip of my nose. “I will never be able to take back what I said, but I hope you find it in your heart to give me a second chance. Even good people are great at making bad decisions. I know I can be a better man, and I know you know that too. Just one,” a kiss to my left cheek, “More,” right cheek, “Chance.”

His lips hovered over mine, waiting for permission before he pressed them into mine. My heart was beating so fast. So strong, all because of him. All for him. 

My eyes met his, “Okay, Harvey.”

Those devastating eyes ignited. His smile grew so wide I got lost in it with my own. I was pressed flat to him, my hands on his shoulders, his hands on my lower back. My ears were buzzing with my pulse and I hoped he felt how fast it was. Who knew Harvey had such a way with words? I wondered how long he practiced all of this in the mirror. Who knows, maybe he was secretly a hopeless romantic and-

“Claudia,” Harvey snapped me out of my daydream. 

“Hmm?” “Please tell me I can kiss you.”

Oh. Right. 

“And what if I say no?”

“Then I won’t.”

“And if I say yes?” “I’ll make sure it is the best damn kiss you’ve ever and will ever have.”

Sounds pretty good to me. I pressed up on my toes, arms wrapping around his neck, and finally let our lips say hello. It had been too long, It felt so right, so perfect. And I realized it felt like all the other times we’ve kissed; I didn’t want to kiss anyone else. I wanted to kiss Harvey. Harvey goddamn Specter. 

I should find out what his middle name is from Donna to surprise him. 

“Come over tonight,” he blurted out.

“What?” “Come over, let me cook something for you. We can make it our first date. A real date. Let me start this off on the right foot. Unless tonight is too soon and you need more time to heal and process or-”

“Just stop talking,” I literally put my fingers over his mouth. “I’d love to come over for dinner, Harvey.”

If I hadn’t been in his arms I’m sure he’d jump up and down out of excitement. He kissed me again, and again, and again. The slight stubble on his chin tickled my neck enough for me to tuck down into my shoulders when he kissed below my ear. 

“Hey, Claudia, I just want to make sure- oh. Well, this seems to be going well,” Donna had a proud smile on her face, arms crossed over her chest.

“It is,” Harvey beamed down, never taking his eyes off of me. 

“Good, I’m glad to hear it.”

“How much of this was your idea?” I asked. 

“I suggested he get a horse and carriage to surprise you on your way out but he knew you wouldn’t want a grand gesture,” She said. “So I think that should say it well enough as to who came up with all the ideas.” When I looked back at him, he had a flush to his cheeks, and hid his grin. 

“Wow, Harvey, I’m impressed.” “Well,” he shrugged. “I don’t know… I wanted it to be authentic and special. Something that you would take to heart and genuinely appreciate. So it’s the best I could come up with over the weekend because if I didn’t do it soon I was going to explode.”

“Seriously, Claudia. This idiot wouldn’t leave my house for two days. I had to kick him out so he could get a shower and change. Did you even sleep?” “You haven’t slept?” He shook his head. “Harvey, what- okay. We need to do our dinner another day because if you try to cook you might set your house on fire and that would-” “Nope, too bad. I’m fine, really Claudia. I can handle making dinner. I’ll leave early and take a nap if that would make you feel better.” “Yes, it would,” I sighed out, looking back at Donna who had a look that meant trouble. “What?” “You guys are adorable.”

I blushed. “Oh, wait! Before you go, what’s Harvey’s middle name? I mean, he went to you for mine so it’s only fair…”

“Don’t you dare,” Harvey pointed at Donna who all but melted the Wicked Witch of the West with her smirk.

“Reginald.”

“Reginald?” I repeated. “Seriously?”

“It’s a family name, alright?” He defended. “Now, if you two will excuse me I have a very important dinner to plan for an even more important girl. Donna, can you-” “Already cleared your schedule.”

“Remind me to give you a raise.” “Oh I’ve already written a bonus check, it just needs your signature.” “I’m surprised you didn’t forge it,” I snickered. 

“I would’ve but having Harvey do it makes it that much more satisfying.”

Harvey just shook his head, but smiled at us both. “I’ll see you tonight, is seven good?” “Sounds perfect,” I nodded, relishing in his warmth as he pressed one more kiss to the top of my head before leaving. 

“So,” Donna swayed on her feet. “I take it that things went well?” “Yeah, yeah it did. I was surprised, today has been so weird. Even Griffin apologized to me.” “Griffin? Really?” “Yeah,” I followed in step behind her towards the bullpen. “He genuinely apologized to me. It was so unexpected. Now this… I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t dreading this happening. But it turned out way better than I expected so I can’t complain. I need to stop expecting the worst case scenario all the time and believe that I can handle anything that comes at me.”

“Now that sounds like true growth and confidence,” Donna slung her arm over my shoulder. “And definitely something Harvey couldn’t have taught you.” “No, he didn’t. That was all on my own.”

___

As I packed up to head home for the day, my stomach was on fire with nerves about tonight. Not nerves, excitement. 

“Hey, Claudia,” Griffin caught up to me right before the elevator closed. “Do you want to join us for drinks tonight?”

I just smirked. “Sorry, Griffin. I can’t, I have a date with Harvey Specter.” And I let the door shut before he could get on.

____

This building. For fucks sake his front door cost more than what I make in a year, probably. The door man had given me a bit of a side eye when I asked to be let up to Harvey. Well, here I was. 

The bottle of wine in my hand wasn’t getting any colder as I paced outside of his apartment. Was I making this a bigger deal than it needed it to be? Most definitely. 

I knocked. 

Harvey opened it a few moments later, a smug look on his face. “I was wondering how long you were going to just stand there.”

God dammit. The heat rose up my neck and I looked away. “Just shut up and take the wine.”

He chuckled, plucking it from my grasp before stepping aside to let me in. I gazed up and into his hallway, following it down to the kitchen. Woah… holy windows. The already set sun lit up the sky with blues and purples, making all of this feel very cinematic. 

“You didn’t need to bring this, Claudia,” Harvey smiled nonetheless. 

“I just- I don’t know, isn't that what people do when they’re invited over?”

“Why are you still so nervous?” 

Right to it, I guess. “What makes you say that?” “Well,” he sighed, shoving his hands in his pockets. He was wearing all black. He looked… too good for his own good. Or mine for that matter of fact. “For starters, you’ve clearly been running your fingers through your hair. Second, I’ve watched you fiddle with that string on your sleeve at least four times now.”

My fingers ceased their motion. I had been toying with it. “I like to keep my hands busy.”

“I call it a nervous habit.”

“Did you invite me here for dinner or just to pick on me for being anxious?” 

“You have no reason to be anxious here,” he crept closer, taking my hand in his. Harvey gently kissed the back of my fingers. “There is no one here to watch, no prying eyes to hide from. It’s just me, Claudia.”

“And that is precisely what makes me nervous,” I did let a laugh bubble up. “But, you’re right. I guess there is no reason to be so… terrified.”

“Good,” he smiled, placing his hands on my hips. I let mine fall around his shoulders. “Dinner will be ready in a few minutes.” I turned to look behind me, a few pots and a pan of vegetables on the stove. Harvey’s hands still lingered on my sides as I peered over to look inside.

“I didn’t know the great Harvey Specter could cook,” I jabbed, making him roll his eyes playfully. “It looks lovely, thank you.”

“Told you, there’s more to the name than the title it comes with.”

From the table, I watched him plate the stir fry dish and bring it over. I was starving, and I made sure to eat my lunch a little later so I wouldn’t be ravenous by the time this dinner rolled around. I wasted no time taking a forkful and practically inhaling it. 

“I’ll take that as a good sign?” 

I nodded, “It’s amazing. Where did you learn to cook like this?” “Here and there. My brother owns a bar and restaurant back home, we used to like to cook together all the time.” “I didn’t know you had a brother,” I tilted my head. “That’s amazing, though. Glad you put those skills to good use.”

“Do you have any siblings?”

I hummed, “Yeah I have two brothers. I’m the baby of the family.”

“Am I going to have to win their trust one day?” 

My laugh echoed through the spacious dining room, “No, they’re pretty cool. Vince, my oldest brother, is married, has two kids who are in college. My other brother, Caleb, is the one you’ve gotta watch out for. He’s my twin and very vocal about the men in my life, especially when he doesn’t think they’re good enough for me.”

“I see,” Harvey gave me a look I knew all too well. 

“Yeah, he can be a pain in my ass sometimes. But I love him, he always stood up for me when I was too afraid. Whether someone was picking on me in school or tried to get one up on me at a bar, he was always there. He’s just protective of me, they both are, but Caleb… he’s always had my back.” “It’s good to have those types of people on your side,” Harvey’s smile was so bright. 

For about an hour we ate and had dessert. I don’t know how, he probably asked Donna, but he had my absolute favorite chocolate cake. Coated in a thick butter cream, it practically melted in my mouth. I wasn’t shy about telling him how delicious it was. 

“I could marry this cake,” I knew I was being dramatic, but I didn’t care. “If I could take this cake, and mold it in the shape of a man, I would.”

Harvey grinned, looking from the cake on his plate, back up to me as I spooned another mouthful. He dipped his finger in the frosting and swiped it across his cheek. I blushed, so hard, and he just laughed and laughed. 

“You think you’re funny, huh?” I had to put my face in my hands. 

“I do, actually. Why don’t you come over here and clean it off for me,” Harvey spoke dangerous words. I raised my eyebrow in question, but he merely scooted his chair back in response, palms turned upward. 

Now or never, I thought. 

I stood, my bare feet padding quietly to Harvey. This is where I had confidence. Could use his own game against him. Because up until this point, all Harvey knows about me is that I am a nervous wreck in front of him. 

The cards have no longer been dealt in his favor. 

I swung my leg over his, perching on his thigh. I took my thumb and ran it across his face, collecting the decorative icing off his cheek, licking my thumb clean. His eyes tracked my movements, especially when I stuck out my tongue and showed him the mess.

His throat bobbed, and his eyes darkened. 

“Where did that shy, blushing Claudia go?” Harvey’s voice sent a chill down my spine. 

“Away, for now,” I smirked. “There are plenty of versions of Claudia you haven’t met before.”

“And who exactly is this version?” He asked.

“That depends,” I huffed. “Are you going to let me have what I want or are you going to make me earn it?”

Harvey’s hands crept up my thighs, cupping my ass gently. “You’re gonna let me choose?”

“You better choose carefully.”

“And why is that?”

“Because,” I said. “You can either let me take what I want, or try to take what you want. But I’ll let it be known, that isn’t possible. You won’t be able to resist me long enough to uphold that promise.”

“Oh, you think I’m that easy?” Harvey countered, tightening his hold on my body. I let out a whine, enticing him into my game further. 

“I don’t know, Harvey.” I ran my hand down his chest, grinding back and forth on his thigh. I leaned close to his ear, “I can be your every fantasy or your worst nightmare.”

I pulled away from his body, taking a few steps back and towards another hallway. I assumed that’s where his bedroom was, and judging by the screeching of the chair against the floor, I was heading in the right direction. 

The first door I pushed open was, thankfully, the right room. His clothes were hung up neatly in the closet on the opposite side of the room, the city below shining onto the walls. Harvey shut the door quickly, turning on a lamp beside his bed. 

Harvey grinned like the devil and crushed his mouth to mine. I didn’t waste any time letting his tongue tangle with mine. Harvey kissed like the god he was, like a true emperor. He tasted like pure sin, like the cake we were just sharing.

My hands went to the buttons on his shirt, fitting them through the tiny holes and pushing it off his shoulders. 

“Mmm wait, sweetheart,” Harvey broke our lips apart. “I don’t wanna do it this way tonight. Let me take care of you. Please.”

Well, when he sounded like that, who was I to resist him? I let him lay me down, his body between my legs as he placed the most tender kiss on my lips. He moved down my chest, slowly lifting my shirt and placing his mark on my stomach. Up my chest, and my neck. 

“You are so beautiful, Claudia. And I can’t believe I get to have all of you to myself. I can’t wait to make you feel so good.”

I sighed out, letting my eyes close as he explored my body. He was forward with his choices, but he wasn’t ever harsh. He was so soft. So loving and so caring. No one had ever made me feel equally nervous or excited as Harvey did. But now… I wasn’t afraid of him. I don’t think I could ever again. 

“Is it okay if I take these off?” “I wasn’t sure you knew how to ask for permission,” I giggled. He just scowled, but I nodded. “Of course, Harvey. Do whatever you want.” “Don’t-” he swallowed. “Don’t say things like that when I am trying to be sweet and nice to you.”

“I think you’re forgetting that I like it when you manhandle me,” I smiled up to the ceiling before looking at him between my legs. “Sorry, carry on.”

He laid a not so gentle tap to the inside of my thigh before removing my skirt. The chill of the air spread goosebumps across my skin, even more when he placed kisses from my ankle to my hips bone. 

“God I could spend all day between your legs. They’re so perfect,” he praised, spreading them wide so he could fit his torso between them. “You’re so fucking hot, Claudia.” I flushed, beet red, and turned away from him. But his fingers brought me right back. 

“You don’t get to be shy now, sweetheart. Not tonight, let me see all of you.”

“I’m all yours Harvey.” Our eyes locked, and the sparks flew. His lips were on mine, hurried, but not starving. It was intense and passionate and everything I could’ve asked it to be. He lifted my shirt over my head and slipped off my bra from behind. Thankfully his chest was warm against mine.

From one second to the next, Harvey swooped me on top of him and rolled, tugging the sheet with him. When they were freed, he laid me back down and put them over his body. 

“Oh, guess I should get these off,” he grinned, pushing his jeans down his thighs, his briefs going with them. Man… what a sight to behold. Harvey wasn’t shredded, but it was clear his boxing habits kept him in good shape. 

There was something about him that just made me want to crumble and fold. 

Harvey’s lips were hot as they moved all over me, nipping and biting and leaving tiny marks here and there. Before he could lose all his resolve, he reached over to his bedside table and plucked a foil packet from a little jar. Classy. 

“Doing okay, sweetheart?” He smoothed down my hair. 

“Yes, Harvey. I’d be better if…” I locked my legs around his middle, pulling him to me. “You just got on with it.” “Such an impatient little thing,” his grin gave away his facade. 

“Oh please, don’t act like you’re not craving this as much as I am.” “You’re right,” he smirked, lining up and pushing all the way in. a low groan escaped his flushed lips. “But I know you can’t get enough of this.”

I breathed heavily, clinging to him. His hips stirred, slowly pulling back, and sinking all the way in. Harvey rested his head on my shoulder, tongue making patterns on my ignited skin. I tugged at his hair, lips working on their own to find all his sweet spots. 

I raked my nails up his back, not missing when his hips slowed and he moaned. So I did it again. His thumb found its way between my legs and circled around where I wanted it most. He wasn’t kidding when he said he was going to take care of me. 

Harvey took his time, making sure that I was feeling good and got what I wanted. This was so different from the feverish moments we’ve had in the office. But it was somehow way better. Well, it could use one thing.

As he laced our fingers together, I moved our hands up. He stopped kissing me for a moment to give me a puzzled look. But I slipped his grip from mine and placed his hand on my throat. 

“I don’t need you to go all ‘sir’ on me tonight, but just give me this. Please.” I did the best I could with my eyes to lure him in, and it worked. It tightened, but it was never tight. It was just there, a reminder of the part of him I was going to get to see whenever I wanted. 

He started to let his control slip, and I knew it was hard for him to be so gentle. But I appreciated it so much. I let some of my control slip as well, just because I wanted to rile him up. His breath quickened, and so did his hips. His thumb was relentless between my legs and I could feel my high approaching.

“Come on, sweetheart, let go. Make yourself feel so good for me.” There it was, the Harvey that kept me up at night. That has plagued my dreams for the past few days. 

I met his hips with mine, and my release crashed over me when I wasn’t expecting it. I shook in his arms as he continued to move, chasing his own time. 

“Fuck, Harvey,” I gasped. “Let go for me, you did such a good job making me feel good.”

He cursed, tucking his head down momentarily before crushing his mouth to mine, not shy about how I was making him feel. His body went rigid, and the praise streamed out of his mouth.

“Fuck fuck Claudia… god you feel so good. You are so perfect for me. So soft and warm.”

My lips would surely be bruised tomorrow morning, but I didn’t care. All I cared about was being here with Harvey. About carrying him through the aftershocks of his release. I rubbed at his back, kissed his neck and cheeks. When he lifted his head, he had this dreamy look on his face. 

“You look so hot,” he ran his thumb across my cheek, bringing me in for another kiss. “Thank you for giving me a second chance.”

“I’m glad I decided to do it. I can’t decide which Harvey I like more. This one or the one who calls me sweetheart.”

“Did I not call you sweetheart tonight?” “You did, but not the way you do when I call you ‘sir’.”

“Ahh, I see,” he smirked. “As much as I would like to think that I could flip a switch right now, I don’t want to spoil this moment with you.”

“If you don’t want to spoil it, then you should take us into the shower.”

And then I was in the shower. Hot water streaming between us from the rain shower head. His hands were soft as he kneaded my body; they particularly felt nice on my ass, especially when he added his lips to the mix. 

“You are so amazing, Claudia. I cannot stress that enough.” “You’re doing an amazing job,” I smiled, kissing him. “You’re not so bad yourself.”

“I know,” he grinned, smacking my ass before lathering up his hands and running them through my hair. It was hard to not fall asleep standing up. “Sweetheart, if you keep making those noises it is going to be very very hard to not take you right here.”

My eyes flew open, his very apparent arousal pressing into my backside. Well, alright then. Go Claudia, you sexy son of a bitch!

“And who’s to say that I wouldn’t want that?” “I am trying to hold back, you know. I wanted tonight to be different, to be special. I didn’t want it to be heated and rough and-”

“Harvey,” I turned, pressing a hand to his chest. “I know.” “I wanted to ‘make love’ or whatever they call it in those cheesy romance books you read.”

I laughed out loud, picturing Harvey curled up on the couch with a book in his hand, a fire in the fireplace. “Nobody says ‘making love’ any more, babe.” “Babe?” “Yeah, babe. I figured you wouldn’t like sugar, or honey bun, or baby for that matter.”

“Don’t make me sound older than I am, please. For fucks sake I passed the Bar when you were in highschool.”

“It doesn’t bother me all that much anymore,” I admitted, wrapping my arms around his neck. “I thought it would, but it doesn’t really make a difference to me.”

“Good, I’m glad it doesn’t freak you out,” he smiled. “And, for the record, I hope it doesn’t freak your folks out.”

“It won’t.”

He lifted up a brow, “How could you know?” “Because I already told them about you.” I felt him go tight. “Relax. They knew who you were already and they couldn’t have been more excited that I found a caring, respectful, well respected man.”

He let out a sigh, “and your brothers?” “They don’t know yet, but don’t worry about them, either. It will be okay.”

“When did you become the consoling one? It’s weird.” “I know, right?” I giggled. When I looked into his eyes, there was a fondness to his gaze. He was looking at my body, but not in a way he had before. “Why are you looking at me like that?” Harvey shrugged, “I just love you so much, Claudia. And I am so proud of how far you’ve come in just these first couple of months.”

My heart hitched in my chest, then beat so wildly I wasn’t entirely sure it didn’t burst through my skin and land in his hands. I froze. Mike had been right. Harvey wasn’t just some cock, high strung New York attorney that couldn’t decipher his own feelings. He seemed incredibly in tune with his emotions and that couldn’t be more attractive. 

I just kissed him. I didn’t know what else to do other than kiss him. He had to take a step back to support our combined weight. Harvey’s arms were strong around my waist, his lips reassuring and just as firm as his grip. 

“I love you too, Harvey. So fucking much.”

____

The comforters pulled tight, Harvey's body pressed behind mine… I couldn’t think of a more relaxing way to end the night. Especially after I slipped to my knees in the shower and showed him just how much I loved him. 

“You don’t know how long I’ve been dreaming about having you in my arms one night. All night long.”

I hummed, scooting back so his chest met my back, his legs molding with mine. “I may have fantasized about it once or twice as well.” “Have you now?” “Again, there are several versions of Claudia you haven’t met before.” “And I look forward to coaxing every single one of them out with my mouth… my tongue… my hands… my-”

“Tomorrow,” I whispered, letting my eyes lull shut. “We can do it all again tomorrow. On the table, on the counter, on the couch-” “You’re not helping the situation here, you know,” he tugged at my half-dried hair. “Don’t get me started, sweetheart. I just might not let you get any sleep tonight.”

I clenched my thighs together. This was going to be such a sweet, tortuous game to play. And I got to play it every day. Every night, if I wanted. He wouldn’t be able to resist me. I had a secret weapon.

“Whatever you say, sir.”

His hand was wrapped around my throat, forcing my head to turn back to look at him. He clicked his tongue, eyes more awake than they had been a few minutes ago. “Oh sweet, innocent little Claudia. I guess you haven’t learned your lesson yet. It’s okay, I’d be happy to give you more instruction. I think I recall saying that eventually I would break you down over and over again until all you could remember was my name and how to breathe. Well, sweetheart. What do you think? Because I think you can still form coherent thoughts. I think it’s time we change that, don’t you?” I nodded, “Yes.”

His grip tightened and tightened and tightened. “Yes what?”

I smirked, climbing into his lap and taking him into my hand. “Yes, sir.”

[rottenpumpkin13]

Mass text from Director Lazard:

Attention! According to my sources, the Department of SOLDIER is getting a surprise inspection by the President in less than 2 hours. Please wear your uniforms (shirt included!) and be on your best behaviour. If you have to, you can use the storage room 4903, but please no human or animal corpses this time. Use the incinerator in R&D. Please remember to pick up all your belongings after the inspection, let's not traumatise our cleaning staff again.

The Fire Olympics scheduled for Saturday is an unofficial event and we are NOT going to mention it to the President.

Kind regards,

Lazard

Inspection Day

• Lazard sends the email, then casually goes back to work, reviewing some documents, the norm. The SOLDIERs are a handful, sure, but trusts his men. They're good people and that's why he's letting them have the fire olympics. After all, they deserve it. They've been on his best behavior lately and—why does he smell smoke and hear screaming?

• He gets up and rushes out into the main hallway.

• First thing he sees is Sephiroth running from a determined Angeal and four other SOLDIERs. Angeal has a uniform shirt in his hands and the others are all holding tranquilizer guns.

• Angeal is laughing manically while chasing him, screaming "HAHA WE GOT YOU NOW BITCH" and Sephiroth is heard replying with "I REFUSE. NEVER. OVER MY DEAD BODY."

• Genesis is crying. He's playing tug of war with his red coat while two 3rds try to wrestle it away from him.

SOLDIER: Commander, I understand why you're upset, but it's not part of the issued uniform!

Genesis: But I'm the Crimson Commander! The Red Mage of ShinRa! How else am I supposed to show that I'm special!?

• Meanwhile Kunsel stumbles out of Genesis's office looking dazed and petrified.

Kunsel: The amount of illegal shit in this man's office OH MY god. Zack! Hey Zack, help us drag some of this kerosene, gasoline, fireworks, Molotov cocktails, Dynamite, Sephiroth cardboard cutout filled with bullet holes, and what I hope isn't drugs down into the storage room...Zack? Zack, where are you going?

• Zack ignores him. He's holding a box of leashes and cages and looks as white as a sheet.

Zack, mumbling to himself: I knew this was going to happen one day. Okay, Zack, you got this. You got this, don't panic.

• And then Cloud stumbles out of Angeal's office holding a.... suspicious..plant.

Cloud: CODE RED. CODE FUCKING RED. HEWLEY HAD MARIJUANA IN HIS OFFICE.

• Angeal, who was passing by holding a struggling Sephiroth with duct tape over his mouth, stops cold in his tracks.

Angeal: I had WHAT in my office?

Genesis, hopeful: Oh! It grew!? <3

Angeal: YOU WERE GROWING WEED IN MY OFFICE???

• At that moment Zack walks buy with about 8 dogs on leashes and a cage under his arm that contains a feral hamster.

• But no one pays attention because Sephiroth has freed himself, tears away his shirt, and is running away screaming through his duct taped mouth.

• Angeal and the other SOLDIERs run after him, nearly crashing into a dispirited Roche coming in

Roche: Bad news, guys. How are we gonna cover the hole in the lounge wall from the time I drove through it on my bike?

• Zack walks buy with 3 pigs on leashes and an exotic bird on his shoulder.

• Angeal walks back in dragging Sephiroth. Sephiroth has his hands and feet bound. They put him in another shirt and are now left with the arduous task of tying his hair up.

Sephiroth: #$*@&!

Angeal: Woah! You kiss your mother with that mouth?

Sephiroth:

Angeal: Ah shit, man, sorry.

• Zack rides by on a horse.

• Genesis walks in wearing the standard SOLDIER uniform without his added accessories.

Genesis: No, no, noooo! I look so boring! How am I supposed to—ACK!

• Kunsel crashes through the ceiling and falls on top of Genesis. Genesis is now partially unconscious on the floor covered in white dust, and there is now a gaping hole in the ceiling.

• Kunsel: Guys, quick, someone help me burn these illegal documents I stole from the turks and was hiding in the vents!

• A few SOLDIERS run out of the elevator hacking and coughing with watering eyes.

Luxiere: Commander Rhapsodos's illegal items broke the incinerator.

• Zack runs by chasing 7 chickens.

• Cloud runs in.

Cloud: You're not gonna believe this! Remember the stolen materia the Turks were investigating a few months back? I found the stash here. The culprit is a SOLDIER!

Genesis: Well they're not going to confiscate MY loot!

Cloud: IT WAS YOU!?

• Zack passes by with what could potentially be all of the Chocobos in Midgar.

• Angeal finally gets Sephiroth into the complete, official SOLDIER uniform sans accessories. Sephiroth looks severely miffed and wants to run away, but Angeal is holding a tranquilizer gun.

• Zack walks by with an Alligator. It's notable to mention that the alligator has a name tag that reads Lacoste.

• And then Roche walks back in.

Roche: Im gonna pass out. Did you guys read the handbook? Article 38 says all SOLDIER operatives cannot have hair that exceeds 30 centimeters.

• Angeal looks at Sephiroth.

• Sephiroth looks at Angeal.

• Angeal pulls out a razor.

Sephiroth: OH NO YOU DON'T

• Both he and Roche run away screaming.

Genesis: Oh, I almost forgot about the stripper pole we installed in the gym. Better go take that down.

• Zack rushes by riding an ostrich.

Lazard: I'm going to get fired.

[archie-sunshine]

So, What Now?(Rehabili/Cohabi-Tation)

CHAPTER 1: In Which there is an Announcement and an Offer Between Friends Ex-Enemies

FIC TAGS: Eventual Whirl/Cyclonus/Tailgate, Cyclonus/Tailgate, polyamory, slowburn romance, mutual pining, slice of life, fluff, comedy, eventual smut(planned for later chapters), sappy mushy lovey stuff, polycue, May eventually have illustrations

The Lost Light has a brand new universe to explore! But everyone's still tired from the old one! In the interim between wacky hijinks, a solution is offered to those bored to death by peacetime- Why form a club about it or renovate your hab suite of course!

Whirl doesn't know how he feels about all the pep. And even worse, he doesn't know how to feel about Cyclonus and Tailgate wanting him to join in on their clean slate.

Chapter 2 Here! Chapter 3 Here! Chapter 4 Here! Chapter 5 Here! Chapter 6 Here! Chapter 7 Here! Chapter 8 Here!

_________________________

Author's Notes: I think about Whirl Cyclonus and Tailgate EVERY DAY. They deserve the world, and so I'm going to give it to them.

“So! As we enter our new universe, and plunge into a world of endless possibility, there’s some important things we’d like to take the time to discuss!”

With a world of infinite possibility and endless promise stretching out before them, one would think- rather one would hope, pray even- that it would be impossible to be bored. 

But apparently, once the lost light ripped a hole from one universe to the next, anything was possible. And Whirl was truly, deeply, madly bored. It had only been a deca-cycle and a half since the big jump, and for him, the promise and possibility was waning. It seemed like the crew was set on ‘taking a beat’(ugh) before jumping into anything too risky. Something about healing and resting up after such a climactic series of battles (snore) before running headfirst into more danger. In all honesty, during Rodimus’s disjointed address informing the crew of that matter, Whirl had found it more interesting to do literally anything else. 

Like people watching. If there was anything good about the break, it at least gave him the time to take stock of the new energy in the place. There was a denta rotting saccharine cloud of hope and joy in the air. For the first few cycles Whirl had taken part in it as well, the partying, the smiling, the laughing, the dancing, et cetera. But now it was getting a bit old. A bit old was an understatement even. 

It seemed like every other bot was hand in hand with someone, or standing a bit too close. Hell even the captain’s balcony reeked of love and joy. Whirl wasn’t a stick in the mud, but it felt like the ~positive and loving vibes~ were pinging off his plating like a constant series of annoying flicks and pokes. 

He shuffled a ways back deeper into the crowd, offlining his optic for a brief moment to let the mumbles of the crew wash over him. When he onlined it again, it was in response to a familiar voice-

“Whirl! Hey- Whirl!” Tailgate chirped, waving at the taller bot from his spot sitting next to Cyclonus. They’d been attached at the hip recently, disgustingly cute, a set of words Whirl never thought he’d use in reference to Cyclonus. 

Whirl raised his servo, letting him know he was heard as he shuffled on over towards the loverbots. “What’s up?” He asked, cocking his helm and leaning against the wall next to them. 

“Isn’t that super exciting- what Rodimus said?” Tailgate whispered, craning up to him. Whirl leaned down a  bit to close the distance. Frag it was kinda hard to have a politely hushed conversation with this height difference.

“Huh? The break? That's the opposite of exciting- sitting on our skidplates for ages? Gimme a break.” Whirl snorted, crossing his arms. 

Tailgate gave him a confused look. “What- No! He said we could do renovations since there are some empty hab suites- were you paying attention?”

Whirl squinted at him. 

Tailgate continued to look confused.

Cyclonus cycled his vocalizer. “I don’t think anyone but you expects Whirl to listen to a speech longer than a klik.” He said quietly, placing a gentle servo on Tailgate’s shoulder pad.

“OH- yeah-” Tailgate nodded quickly, a bit embarrassed. “Right- So you know how there’s less people onboard now than there were at the start-”

“That’s an understatement.” Whirl muttered.

“-There’s like a ton of uninhabited hab suites now, so he said after the whole announcement meeting we could go claim some to make a whole hab UNIT out of if there are any empty ones around us!” He was giving Whirl a look like it was the most exciting thing in the whole universe. Tailgate was. Tailgate who had stuck his finger in the forehead of a tyrannical dictator. Whirl glanced at Cyclonus. Cyclonus gave whirl a meaningful look. The kind that said something like ‘Humour him?’

Whirl nodded slowly. “... And thats… Exciting.” He said.

“SUPER exciting. It’ll be nice to stretch our legs, maybe do some decorating- OH! Hey, aren’t you lonely?” Tailgate cut himself off. 

Whirl, taken aback by such an abrupt observation, glanced around. Cyclonus, too, was blinking a bit incredulously at his conjunx. “E-Excuse me??” Whirl asked.

“NO- I mean- y’know- because you don’t have a suitemate-” 

“OH! I mean- I wouldn’t put it that way, flying solo suits me just fine.” Whirl shrugged.

Tailgate cycled his optics. 

“I’m fine with being on my own, Tailgate, I like having the space.” He said, turning his helm away to scan the crowd. 

Out of the corner of his optic, Whirl could see Tailgate turning his gaze to Cyclonus, grabbing his hand. Cyclonus shook his head sagely. He could hear the near silent whirr of them conversing in their heads, trading thoughts so he wouldn’t eavesdrop. 

Whirl turned his attention back to the speech. 

“-Next on the docket, we turn to Ultra Magnus with some important morale building updates!” Rodimus announced, sweeping a servo out to the larger mech. Whirl sunk back against the wall. Primus, just when I start pretending to care again.

Polite applause filled the room as Magnus took his place at the front of the group. He cycled his vocalizer, lifting up a datapad and beginning to read. “Hello everyone. As you all are well aware, during the past deca-cycle we conducted a survey regarding your thoughts on the brief ‘adventuring hiatus’ as our co-captain has decided to call it.” He began, briefly glancing at Rodimus, who offered a prideful nod at his expert naming strategy. “The results have been published, and your resounding, collective answer was, unsurprisingly, a pervasive feeling of boredom.” 

There was a rumble of agreement that rippled through the crowd. 

Ultra Magnus nodded, not looking up from his datapad. “As a means of quelling discontentment, we have come to a decision. In the halls and communal spaces within the ship you will now find holoboards which are available for advertisement as part of our new…” He paused for effect. “Communal Bonding and Engagement Initiative.” He paused again, looking out over the confused crowd for an excited reaction. Rodimus threw his servos in the air, giving a big enthusiastic double thumbs up to gesture for more of a response. After a few kliks of murmuring, Rodimus stepped forwards.

“We’re now actively encouraging you to form clubs and/or recreational sports teams! With the new unused space from our uh… lessened crew, we encourage you to begin construction on whatever spaces you might need-” Rodimus explained over a growing, more enthusiastic din. 

Whirl glanced around, noting the reaction. Bots glanced around at one another, growing smiles on their faceplates and loudening chatter filling the room as they traded excitement about the idea.

“WITH- Proper clearance and permits-!” Ultra Magnus thundered over the growing noise. Soon enough the room was filled with excitement and chatter. 

Whirl rolled his optic. If this was their idea of fun he might just start making problems on purpose. He turned his gaze to the two bots beside him. He had no doubt that Tailgate would be pinging off the walls at this concept- and he was correct, what with the way he was vibrating violently and gripping Cyclonus’s hand so hard it might as well have crumpled like foil. What he wasn’t expecting was the quiet, approving nod that Cyclonus was giving the idea. He wasn’t even doing it for Tailgate’s benefit! Tailgate wasn’t even looking at him for approval!

Magnus had resumed chattering, something about proper procedure for requesting space, and holding a workshop on how to properly take down walls for renovation purposes and Whirl was already bored of it. He was… preoccupied. It was hard to focus on most things for Whirl. But somehow, there was something about Cyclonus and Tailgate’s stupid relationship that held his attention. Maybe it helped that he’d kind of encouraged the two of them together, maybe it was all the gazing at Cyclonus’s constant pining that got him invested. But it was something he couldn’t help but watch. 

They were chatting with one another again, meaning Tailgate was babbling faster than Blurr and Cyclonus was gazing lovingly into his optics with an expression like normal energon, rather than the spoiled version he usually looked like. 

Whirl vaguely heard the doors of the hall open, and Rodimus eke out another ‘Til all are one!’ over Ultra Magnus’s continued reading of the CBEI rulebook that he had no doubt Ultra Magnus had relished in writing. The room was already starting to empty. It felt like Whirl’s audials were a million miles away, the whole room a little muffled. 

Finally, as the room was almost completely empty, Tailgate popped back up onto his pedes, still chatting with Cyclonus. 

“-ly if we’re going to grab the rooms around us before someone else gets their servos on them.” Tailgate’s voice came back into focus as he helped Cyclonus up off the bench. Cyclonus chuckled, which might have just sounded like an apathetic grunt to anyone else. 

“Aw, slag, everyone’s already got a head start!!” Tailgate wailed, grabbing his own helm with both servos as his optics flashed with despair. He began to jog out the door, rolling into his alt mode clumsily and speeding off down the hall, swerving between bot’s legs and around a corner. 

Whirl laughed to himself as he watched Tailgate’s tiny frame disappear off into the ship. “He’s a bit of a servo-full, huh?” He quipped, turning to face Cyclonus. 

Cyclonus nodded with a quiet hum. “You’d be too, in his place.” He said. 

“What, like I’m not a servo-full now?” Whirl grinned- in his own way. “I could be a bigger pain in your plate than he ever could.” He prodded a claw into Cyclonus’s chest. 

Cyclonus raised a brow ridge, folding his arms and cocking his head. “I don’t know, Whirl. You’ve mellowed out from my perspective.” He said in that infuriating tone, humor dry as a desert. 

“Mellow? I’d better up my game then.” He sneered, leaning his optic right up to Cyclonus’s head to leer at him. As usual he gave little reaction, gazing off down the hallway Tailgate had escaped to. 

“You spend too much time in your hab suite.” Cyclonus didn’t turn his optics to face him. “Even if you had upped your game I’d never have noticed.” 

Whirl was quiet for a long moment, turning his helm back down the hall. “... I like the privacy, what can I say?” 

“Tailgate was planning on asking you to join us in our ‘soon to be luxury habitation unit’.” Cyclonus stated bluntly. “He said you seemed lonely.”

Whirl’s optic twitched.

“And sad.”

Whirl’s optic narrowed, flicking down to glance at Cyclonus. He was glancing back at him.

“And it was making him feel lonely and sad-”

“I get the picture, Cyclonus.” Whirl snapped.

The two held each other’s sideways glance for another long beat. 

“I don’t need Tailgate’s pity, I’m doing just fine. Cool as an ice crystal. Never been better.” Whirl added.

Cyclonus let out a quiet ex-vent, taking a step down the hall. “Think about it. The door’s open to you. You know it is.” He tossed one last look over his shoulder. “And I’m not only saying that on Tailgate’s behalf. I can feel it too.” He opened his intake to continue, but shut it, turning back down the hallway. “It doesn’t suit you.” 

Whirl watched the ex-con walk away. That quiet feeling washed in again- Envy? Annoyance?... Longing?- dulling the constant whirr of the ship. Whirl looked down at his servos, clicking his claws together for a moment before glancing around the room.

Yep. Alone again. 

He waited until Cyclonus was out of sight before beginning to walk through the ship back towards his hab suite. He noted the new holoboards, currently empty save for the advertisement for Ultra Magnus’s upcoming CBEI workshop. He figured they wouldn’t stay empty for long, there were far too many bots chomping at the bit in that room. They all loved that kind of community, leave it to a bunch of veterans to jump at the opportunity to get back on a team. Whirl liked it just fine on his side of the fence, thank you VERY much. Teams had a habit of… collapsing on him. 

He tapped at the buttons of his hab suite, the door sliding open with a quiet whoosh. The lights flickered on over his usual mess. He swiped some junk off his slab and laid down. 

After a while of relative stillness the lights flicked off, plunging him back into darkness. He tossed, shifting a bit in an attempt to get comfortable. 

He waited.

And waited.

And waited.

It was always a struggle to recharge. His frame felt restless and wrong. He squished himself into a comfortable enough position and focused on trying to pass out. Counted backwards, counted forwards, replayed the most boring parts of Ultra Magnus’s speeches.

Finally, as he started to power down, he was snapped awake by a tiny bit of text appearing in his comms frequency channel. 

A message from someone. Someone who’d signed their words, even knowing that the receiver would know whoever sent it.

TG: Don’t be a stranger! -Tailgate

… Maybe just visiting some time wouldn’t hurt.

[marlynnofmany]

Pro tip for anyone who lives in a building with a toilet: if the plunger isn't working, and you're tempted to leave the clog until the morning, make sure the water isn't still flowing into the bowl.

And make sure it's not on the ground floor of a two-story house, with a communal plumbing pipe that is now clogged deep enough for any water upstairs to come out that toilet.

...

Related tips:

Carpet that has been soaked in poo water cannot be cleaned by human hands, even with one of those steamer machines.

Drywall that has been soaked in poo water will need to have a one-foot "flood cut" carved into it, to remove the damaged area.

You know that part in ET where the house is covered in tarps because Biohazard™? The water damage people will need to recreate that, with zipper doorways and industrial dehumidifier fans roaring day and night for 3-5 days.

Cats can and will climb inside any holes in the wall. Yes, even that one. Yes, they can climb upward too.

Homeowner's insurance is GREAT.

This little misadventure will cost upwards of $17,000 to fix (but we only have to pay $1000 of it). That's still an expensive clot of toilet paper.

In other news, our new carpet is going to be a different color, and that's exciting.

[fivebrights]

Emotion Booth | Songs for Stanley, the Narrator, and many of the endings.

An expanded ver of the original fanmix, because I finally got to play TSPUD and it permanently rewired my brain the same way TSP did way back when. Happy 4/27; Let's Begin Again.

▶Listen (Spotify)

(tracklist & annotations under the cut)

[SIDE A] 1. Existential Crisis Hour! (Kilo Kish) [Intro/Confusion Ending] 2. Watch the Show (M. Ward) So tomorrow on your way into work, who will be wearing the emperor's clothes? 3. Soundproof Box (Ami Saraiya and the Outcome) Living behind these walls it feels like living in a soundproof box. 4. You're Alive (ANIMA!) [Apartment Ending] Sidewalk walkers, empty vessels, task completers / Go through the motions, keep repeating. 5. In the Glass (OK Go) [Real Person Ending] I tried to call out to him but the glass was perfect. 6. A.A.A. (Squalloscope) Can you do me a favor? Can you give me one cent for everything that doesn't make sense? 7. Crazy (Gnarls Barkley) [Mariella Ending] I remember when I lost my mind / Even your emotions have an echo in so much space. 8. Vein of Stars (The Flaming Lips) [Zending] They'll glow from above our heads / Nothing there to see you down on your knees. 9. Vertigo (The Guggenheim Grotto) [Powerful Ending] It's not that I fear the fall or crushing my bones / I fear the desire to heed the call of that unknown. 10. Humpty Dumpty (AJR) He said, "Screw it, I'mma smile right through it, and I'll scream when no one's around." 11. Why (Andrew Bird) Why'd you do that? You shouldn't have done that. 12. Complaint Department (Lykke Li) [Countdown Ending] Me oh my your luck seems to be no more / If you want to complain, I'm not the complaint department. 13. The Cruel, the Kind and the Bad (Psapp) [Museum Ending] He's taken all your best years away, but he's all that you can find. 14. The Great Escape (Patrick Watson) [Escape Pod Ending] Looking for a way home, looking for the great escape.

[SIDE B] 15. Good Old Desk (Harry Nilsson) [intro] 16. Honest Feedback (Saint Motel) Of all the illegal ways to take someone's life, there's one just as sharp and it's sharp as a knife / it's called honest feedback. 17. Longform (The Dodos) [Theme for the Memory Zone] To place an installation now for all to come and bring what they think about. 18. Eight Seven (Psapp) Though I call you won't reply / You watch me rooting through each door, you watch me lie. 19. Alive Alone (The Chemical Brothers) [Skip Button Ending] No way of knowing if [he's] ever coming back. 20. Here for Good (Jason Lytle) [Epilogue Ending] I'm here for good. 21. X-Rays (Gomez) We didn't turn it on, but we can't turn it off. 22. Since I Left You (The Avalanches) [Freedom Ending] Since I met you, I found the world so new. 23. The End Has Begun (Loudon Wainwright III) [Figurines Ending] We've been here before, you know the signs / The looks and the language, the gestures, the lines. 24. Helplessness Blues (Fleet Foxes) What's my name, what's my station? Oh, just tell me what I should do. 25. Lonely Town (Vulfpeck) He's the mayor of lonely town, population: one. 26. Hallucinating - Mariachi Ver. (Elohim) [Theme for the Infinite Hole] 27. ICE CREAM FEVER (Tomoyuki Tanaka, FPM) [Secret Disco Ending]

[lolahasmoxie]

our story will be different - E.M.

Pairing - Eddie Munson x y/n

Count - 988 words

Warning - angst, but ends in fluff.

Notes - Popped into my head and wouldn't go away. Also, thanks for loving the last couple of head cannons I wrote. You sure do know how to make a hyper-fixated gal feel special.

Cold sheets woke Eddie up at the ungodly hour of 3:27 am. He grumbled to himself as he got out of your warm bed. Peeking his head out of the bedroom, he could see a faint light in the kitchen. Well, that was one mystery solved. Usually, you slept like the dead; once you were out, you were out until the sun's rays started to burn into your bedroom.

He silently padded down the hallway, not wanting to startle you, and felt a slight smile on his lips as he spied on you. You were seated at the small table, a mug of steaming tea in your hand. You were wearing his old boxers and an oversized shirt you had stolen from your dad when you were a pre-teen. On your feet were the slouchy socks Wayne had gifted you for Christmas. His heart felt like it could burst; anyone who saw him would immediately peg him for the love-dumb fool that he was.

His happiness at seeing you was shortlived when he noticed the thousand-yard stare in your eyes. You didn't have that look when you came home, even though he could tell something was off. You had been out with some of your girlfriends. Your best friend had received a new promotion, and it had been a while since you'd all had the chance to let loose and catch up. You had come home shortly after midnight, buzzed and adorably affectionate the way you were when you had one too many. You had quickly given him the highlights of your evening, and after a short makeout session, you had both gone to bed.

"If you stare at that wall any harder, you're gonna put a hole through it," he said softly as he approached the table. His worry grew when your lips quirked up, but your eyes stared straight ahead.

"You should be in bed; it's late."

"Could say the same about you," he said as he sat beside you. He studied you briefly with an elbow on the table, chin in his hand. Messy hair and a sad expression on your face, he worried about what could be hurting you at this hour. "I didn't do something, did I? Cause if I did..."

"No, baby," you interjected quickly. Your eyes finally met his, and you gave him your best happy smile as you took his hand in yours. You brought his hand to your lips, gently kissing his knuckles before placing it back on the table but not letting go. "Just a lot on my mind."

"You wanna talk about it?" he asked. You knew he would never press you for information, and you sighed heavily before casting your eyes down to your joined hands.

"Kai thinks that Chris might be cheating on her."

Eddie let out a heavy sigh at the news. Your best friend had been with her boyfriend for five years, and they had been engaged for almost a year and were planning the wedding. Eddie liked Kai; she had always been kind and friendly to him, but he loved how protective she was over you.

"Jesus," he murmured.

"She's figuring out how she wants to confront him. I knew they'd been having some problems, but I never thought he would actually do something like that to her. I mean....". Your voice drifted off.

"What?" he asked gently. You paused, the intrusive thoughts plaguing you all night finally coming out.

"What if that's us?"

"Baby," he said as he gently squeezed your hand. "No way, that will never be us."

"You don't know that," you said, your voice on the cusp of crying. "I used to think that Kai and Chris were the one couple that would never break up, and now, shit, if they can't make it, what's to say that won't be us in a year?"

"It'll never happen," Eddie said, his shaggy hair moving as he shook his head.

"You have psychic powers I don't know about?" you teased.

"Don't need them," he said with certainty. "First off, we aren't Kai and Chris; we are us, and we will never end up like them."

"Fucks sake, you play guitar in a band, Eddie. You expect me to believe that you would never cheat?" Eddie chuckled as he scooted his chair closer to you.

"Princess, all other women became pussy non grata the minute I asked you to be mine. I love you, and only you." This time he was the one to raise your joined hands, and you felt your heart melt when his lips touched your knuckles.

"Really?" You should have known that Eddie's dramatic ass would never give you a simple answer. Your breath hitched when he got down on both knees before you, taking your hands in his.

"I would love you even if you were a worm. I will love you when we're old gray farts telling everyone about our grandkids. I will love you until there isn't a breath left in my body. I'll love in this life and the next. Understand?"

"Fuck, you really know how to make a statement," you said as you sniffled at Eddie's assurances. He gave you that boyish grin that made your heart swell as he reached out and brushed an errant tear from your cheek. He quickly stood up and held a hand out to help you up.

"Only the best for my baby," he said with a grin. "Now, I know it's late, but since we don't have to work tomorrow, maybe you could let me show you how much I love you." You couldn't help but giggle as he wiggled his eyebrows at you. How could you say no to him?

So you didn't. You simply let him lead you back to your bedroom and let him cover you like the night. He was right; your story was going to be different.

[gvfgal]

3. Debts & Destiny

Barbarian. Biker!Jake

18+, Minors DNI!

A/n: Back like we never left!!! Make sure to go back and read the prologue & first two chapters for a refresh!! Since it’s been awhile, I’ll be starting a brand new tag list for the story, so if you’d like to be added, let me know!! Pease remember that this story is a little gritty, and has a lot of darker themes, so please read at your own discretion. There will always be warning at the beginning of each chapter per usual! Thanks for sticking with me and I’m looking forward to taking this ride ;)

Content Warnings: Explicit language, explicit sexual content, smoking, drinking, Jake being a dick, dark themes throughout.

Word Count: 3.4K

2: Our Old Friend, Death

Jake spent the remainder of the weekend holed up in your trailer. It was by no means a romantic scene, he’d slept the majority of the time, as the stress of the last few days had finally set in. He only woke up every several hours to eat, have you change his bandage, or to have sex with you, only to crash back out shortly afterwards. When you left for work, Jake was there in your bed, and when you returned well after two in the morning, you’d find him almost in the exact same spot. Snoring lightly, his limbs weaving in and out of the thin quilt, hair; a disaster.

You’d strip out of your work clothes and climb in beside him, curling yourself into his warm naked body. Sometimes he’d wake up and throw an arm around you, sometimes he’d sleep through it, but either way, you enjoyed him being there.

There had been odder things happen in your life than having a stranger you met at the bar only a few days ago all but move into your house. But to you, Jake was no stranger at all. You’d gotten pretty close to the Barbarians during your time in Genoa, and you took a special liking to Ace. And since Ace seemed to be like family to Jake, he was alright in your book.

On top of that, you felt an odd sense of comfort and security having Jake around. Your days in that trailer had been lonely, and it was nice having his company, that was, when he was actually conscious. And you knew he appreciated your company too.

But the weekend had come and gone. It was now Monday, back to business as usual for the Barbarians after days of mourning. Their meetings were held in a small room in the back of the Tavern, all 65 members packed in like Sardines, dressed in their leather jackets adorned with the Barbarian emblem.

Jake’s eyes scanned the room’s walls that were adorned with faded photographs of fallen brothers, his eyes lingering on Jaxon’s photo before looking at the large empty spot that was reserved for Rex’s. Nicky came trudging into the room, his face turned up into a scowl and littered with bruises. Jake had a couple of scrapes of his own, but a side by side comparison would show that Jake had clearly been the victor. Jake watched as he slouched down into his seat and folded his arms across his chest, still clearly upset about the brawl.

At the front of the room, Ace called the attention of all the men, and many of them began taking seats, others opted for standing along the walls.

“Alright, listen up fellas,” his gravelly voice cut through the murmurs and clinks of beer bottles, “we've had a rough last few days, but we made it through, now we’ve gotta get back to business, We have two current situations that demand our attention.”

The room fell silent as everyone listened closely to Ace, including Jake, all too curious about the fate of the Barbarians now that Rex was gone.

“For starters,” Ace continued, his tone serious, “Bobby Thompson, that scumbag of a casino owner, has been dodging our payments. We’re out half a million dollars because of him.”

Murmurs of frustration rippled through the room. The Barbarians relied on those payments to fund their operations, and a betrayal like that was unacceptable to all of them.

Jake was very familiar with Bobby Thompson. He was some low life fraudster from Genoa who asked the Barbarians for a loan to build a casino a hundred miles north some years back. This request was made with the promise that in just a few short years, the club would be able to recoup all their earnings, and become official stockholders in the company. They’d be raking in over a quarter of a million every year for the first few years, and upwards of half a million as the years rolled on.

Jake was only 17 when the deal was made, but he knew even then that Bobby couldn’t be trusted. He’d tried warning his father about doing business with someone of his character, but Rex never paid him any mind.

So in the end, the casino went up, and Bobby Thompson, true to his nature, began lying about the amount of money the casino had been pulling in, therefore shorting the payments he owed the Barbarians, leaving them in the cuurrent predicament.

Ace’s gaze shifted, locking onto Jake’s hardened expression, “and secondly, the EDS wants their million dollars. We owe it to them after that arms deal incident we had back in December.”

EDS. El Dorado Syndicate, Jake was also very familiar with them. The Barbarians had been working for them as long as he could remember, smuggling drugs, weapons, and dirty money all up and down Route 95.

The EDS was run by two ruthless twin brothers, Alejandro and Antonio Ortiz-Fuentes (they felt the need to carry on their mother’s maiden name). The last Jake had heard of them, the much more sane twin Antonio was scentenced to prison for attempted murder, leaving the crazier twin Alejandro in charge of operations.

“Now since Rex is gone, and I’m standing vice president, I will reach out to Alejandro and set up a meeting. So be prepared for a trip to New Mexico in the near future,” Ace looked around the room, “any questions? Concerns?”

A single hand went up near the back of the room.

“Barbarian rules say that a vice president can automatically assume presidential position in the death of the leader. Are you gonna step in?” Ski Ball questioned, and a few others nodded in aggreance, waiting for Ace to respond.

“I have no intentions on stepping up as president, lord knows I’m getting too damn old,” the guys chuckled, “so the next step is to have a vote, which I plan on doing, but not yet. While we try to settle these situations, I’ll be in charge just as Rex would be, I just wont take the official title,” his eyes found Jake’s again, “I’ll pick three men for us to vote for, and that will be based off of everyone’s performance over these next few months.”

Jake blinked at Ace before turning towards Nicky, who was already staring him down, his right eye almost swollen shut. But he could still see the furious determination in his eyes, a silent warning of sorts that he had every intention on taking the title.

A few more pressing matters were addressed before the meeting was adjourned, and the Barbarians poured out of the small room and into the much more spacious area of the Tavern, where they spent the remainder of the afternoon drinking and playing rounds of pool and darts.

You were busy behind the bar, making sure that the libations kept flowing, but that didn’t stop you from stealing glances at Jake every so often. You watched as he won round after round of billiards, placing bets and collecting money from other Barbarians left and right. When his glass was empty, he’d make his way to you for a refill.

“Thanks Cherry,” he’d say every time, giving you a cash tip and a wink before returning to the men.

By ten o’clock, the crowd was much more tame, and Jake came to sit across from you while you continued to work.

“I have a question for you,” you spoke to Jake as you served Ace his drink. Jake lit the cigarette he’d retrieved and puffed it once, “talk to me Cherry.”

When Ace walked away, you leaned across the bar, lowering your voice to ensure no one else could here you, “is there a reason that you’re avoiding going to Rex’s place?”

Jake took another long drag as he stared at you cautiously, “what do you mean?”

You shrugged, picking up the rag that was on the counter and began wiping, “I mean you’ve been here for what, three nights now? And you’ve spent every last one of them tangled up in my sheets. Why?”

Jake placed his cigarette in the ashtray and smiled, “maybe I just like you.”

He was being smug, but you knew there was a lot more to the situation. You could see right past the mask he was putting on, all too familiar with that act.

You stopped wiping the counter to look at him again, “you don’t like me, Jake. You don’t know me. You just like how I fuck.”

Jake’s smile grew wider, “well that may be true. But I think you’re wrong,” he picked up his cigarette and placed it back between his lips, leaning back in his chair with his eyes still on your face, “I think I do know you.”

You tossed the rag into the sink, “oh yeah? Who am I, Jake?”

He was quiet for a moment as he assessed you, taking a long slow drag before blowing the smoke out in your direction.

“I think you’re a girl that’s running from her past.”

Your heart sank into your stomach and your face went blank. How accurate he was scared you, it was as if he could see it written all over your body. His face was smug again, knowing that he’d struck a nerve, and he picked up his glass of whiskey to take a sip.

There was no way you were letting him have it. “You know what, I think I know you, too,” you offered, placing your elbows on the damp counter top.

He nodded his head at you, “who am I, Cherry?”

A smirk crept it’s way onto your face, but it wasn’t a devious one. In fact, it was almost sympathetic, “a man running from his future.”

Jake’s face scrunched up as a sudden tension filled the air, his defensive walls rising, “what’s that supposed to mean?”

Your voice was steady as you continued to hold his gaze, “I mean, I think you know you’re better than this life, better than your father. But deep down, you’re too scared to leave it all behind because you’re afraid that maybe this is… all that there is for you.”

Your words hung in he air, sinking into Jake’s consciousness. The weight of your observation struck him harder than his had done to you, ad he coudln’t deny the truth behind your words, even if he hadn’t fully admitted it to himself yet.

By the way his face began contorting in anger, you knew you must’ve been on to something. He slammed his glass down on the counter, spilling whisky over the spots you’d just wiped down. He stood from his chair, glowering at you as he stubbed out his cigarette, “I stick my dick in you a few times and you think you have me all figured out.”

You watched motionlessly as he stormed out the front door, and once he was gone, you snatched the discarded rag and began wiping again with a heavy sigh.

After a few minutes, Nicky came snaking his way up to the bar, sitting where Jake had been previously.

“Trouble in paradise?” He sneered.

You rolled your eyes at him, “Nicky, fuck off.”

He raised his hands in mock defense, “I just wanted a drink, that’s all.” You paused, waiting for him to give you his order, “Miller Lite, from the tap.”

You grabbed a tall glass and began pouring his drink, trying your hardest to ignore the way his eyes were burning holes into your ass.

“What do you even see in him, anyways?” He pressed on. From the two weeks you spent with Nicky, you knew there was no way he would drop the conversation, but you hoped that if you ignored him, he’d get the hint.

Oh how wrong you were.

“I mean really, Jake isn’t the guy you think he is baby. You and me, we were good together.”

You turned around and sat his beer on the counter, not caring that some of it spilled and you’d have to clean it again, “Nicky, we were never good together. Nothing involving you could ever be good no matter how you package it, you know why? Because you’re not good.”

A sly grin curled onto Nicky’s face as he raised his glass to his mouth, “and you are?”

An unsettling chill ran up your spine at his words. You hadn’t told Nicky about your twisted past, but the way he’d spoken those words, it seemed as if he had glimpsed the cracks in your armor.

You were growing quickly tired of the men around you doing their best to pick you apart. You’d spent years running from your past, from the choices you made that led you to this point, and how Jake and Nicky managed to ruffle your feathers all in a matter of minutes was infuriating. They didn’t know you, none of them did, and you'd never let them get the chance to.

But still, as your gaze met Nicky’s, a whirlwind of emotions surged through you. Anger mixed with self doubt, the weight of your mistakes growing heavier by the second. You wondered if maybe he was right, if your actions had forever tainted your capacity for goodness. Could you ever be truly deserving of good things after what you’d done?

But deep in the recesses of your being, a flicker of defiance burned. Summoning your resolve, you narrowed your eyes at Nicky, crossing your arms over your chest, “how’s that black eye healing up for you?”

The smug look on his face was wiped clean, replaced with malice, “fuck you.”

“Never again,” you scoffed, “on to bigger and better. Or however that saying goes.”

You gave Jake enough time to cool off before going to find him. He was still out in the parking lot, sitting on his bike and lighting a new cigarette. Truthfully, you hadn’t meant to get under his skin the way you did, and you felt sort of bad for setting him off that way. The moonlight that illuminated half of his face showed that he was looking directly at you, his face still contorted into a frown.

But it did little to deter you. With slow steps, you made your way over to him, positioning yourself between his legs and placing your hands on his thighs.

“I didn’t mean to upset you,” you whispered, gently kissing him on the cheek, “I’m sorry.”

You took the cigarette from his mouth and situated it between your lips, and his expression immediately softened. His hands began rubbing small circles on the back of your legs as he looked at you wit those tired eyes.

“I’m sorry for what I said back there, I didn’t mean it.”

Your fingers began rubbing over one of the small bruises on his face, your features the softest Jake had ever seen them.

“I know you didn't. We all say and do things we don’t mean sometimes.”

Jake found himself studying you again, as he did so often. The pull he felt towards you was undeniable, but what you’d said back in the bar was true, he didnt know you. Not like he wanted to. He knew that you held unspoken secrets and depths, just like most people did. But that only furthered his allure, that air of mystery that followed you around was all too enticing.

Yet still, he wanted to unravel that enigma, he wanted to know those depths like he knew his own. He wanted to know your story, understand it, nothing but a genuine yearning to uncover the truths that lay hidden within you.

Jake put his cigarette out and tucked it behind his ear, his hands returning to your legs, “can you get out of here yet?”

You smiled at him, kissing him softly and tasting the tobacco and liquor on his breath, “let m go get my things.”

“God Cherry,” Jake groaned out, his sweaty body pinning yours to the mattress as he fucked into you. He lifted his head to smile down at you and the way your lips were puckered and swollen, tiny spurts of noises escaping from them with every thrust.

“I love when you do that,” he shuddered, bending down to kiss your forehead. The action sent you reeling, it felt so intimate, too intimate for two people in your position. You wrapped your legs tighter around his torso and he grunted.

“Fuck, so good, Cherry… You’re so good.”

His head was tucked in the crook of your neck now, so he couldn’t see the way you reacted to his words.

You’re so good…

You moaned as he dug into you once more, “you think I’m good, Jake?”

His hair tickled the side of your face as he nodded, “God yes. I do baby,” he kissed your shoulder sloppily, “I really do.”

“Say it again,” you urged, nudging him to look at you again.

When he did, you traced a finger along the cut on the round of his lip, causing him to sow his place briefly, his eyes holding confusion and the rest of his lust.

“Please… say it again.”

He’d almost slowed to a complete stop, trying his best to decode the cryptic moment. But your eyes were pleading with him, both to hear those words again and for sweet release.

Jake hitched your right leg higher up on his body before thrusting into you faster and faster, causing your mouth to fall open.

“Cherry,” his voice faltered only slightly, “you’re good. You’re so fucking good.”

With that you crescendoed, falling over a steep edge as you constricted around Jake, both of you wailing out in pleasure.

“So good, so good,” he repeated to you, thrusting a few more times before pulling out and spilling himself onto your stomach. You watched his face as he did so, completely enraptured with him in that moment, for telling you exactly what you needed to hear, even if it wasn’t in the exact context that you needed it in.

Once you both had calmed, Jake made his way into the bathroom, returning shortly with a warm damp cloth. You both were silent as he wiped you clean, then himself.

He wanted to ask you something he wasn’t sure how to ask. He wasn’t exactly sure what to ask. So instead, he laced down beside you, wrapping an arm around you as you cuddled into him, his stare fixed on the ceiling.

“I’m gonna go,” he said after a few minutes of silence, you turned to look at him.

“Tomorrow,” Jake continued, “I’m gonna go to Rex’s tomorrow. Start going through some of his things.”

You began rubbing small circles on his chest, “okay. Do you want me to come with you?”

Jake thought for a moment before shaking his head, “nah. I’ll be good. I’ll be good.”

Silence found the room again, both of you laying there, but in two completely different worlds.

“I’m gonna go smoke,” you stated, “wanna come?”

“I’ll come out in a bit.”

You pulled yourself from the bed, putting on a pair of sweats that were discarded in a corner and stealing Jake’s shirt from the floor.

“I’ll be back.”

As you made your way to the back door, you scooped up a pack of cigarettes from the counter and a lighter from the coffee table.

Standing on the back porch, you looked out to the main road that ran from one end of Genoa to the other. You remember the day you first came driving up that road a couple years ago; twenty dollars in your pocket and two bags worth of belongings. Scared, no plan, no idea what to expect. You had no idea back then that this would be your home for the next two years, and though it wasn’t paradise, you were grateful for it. This was better than the alternative.

You thought back to your less than civil conversation with Nicky earlier.

“…you’re not good.”

“…and you are?”

Then, just moments earlier with Jake.

“You’re so fucking good…”

You wondered if Jake could see through you the way Nicky did, but if that were the case, would he still be so willing to say those words to you. Maybe he was clueless, or maybe he wasn’t, and simply didn’t care.

None of that mattered though. In your own mind, you weren’t good, far from it. You did good things often, but. You’d also done very awful things, things you felt eclipsed all the good.

And you didn’t deserve good things. You believed that too.

But hearing Jake say it so adamantly back there, even if it was more than likely about the sex you were having, it made you think different, if only for a moment. One fleeting, blissful moment.

4. Star-Crossed Strangers

[noya-noya-noya]

one of my favorite things about the whole buddie dynamics is the fact that while Buck is healing and beginning to choose himself (armchair scene) there's still a part of him that thinks he's only going to get love by risking his life, and that his life IS expendable. an "if I die, that's fine, but i sure would be sad if someone else dies" mentality.

it reminds me of that one line in inochi no kirawareteiru "Frankly, we don't care a bit if we, ourselves died but we'd be pretty said if the people around us died".

and Eddie... Eddie has been assuring him consistently that he is cherished, he is important, and he gets him out of his head when he's starting to spiral.

1...

Buck: I just, I wish I could- Eddie: Fix it? Buck: Yeah, yeah. I know I'm the guy who always wants to fix everything. Eddie: Hey! It comes in handy when you have a bunch of holes in your wall.

2...

Buck: They never wanted another kid. They just had me for parts. Defective parts, as it turned out.

Eddie: Hey, that's not on you.

3...

Eddie: I'd eat a couple extra slices. You look like you're wasting away to nothing.

Buck: Eddie--

Eddie:I will say, honestly, you being laid up is working out for me. I mean, you're no abuela, and you're half a Carla, but you'll do in a pinch.

Buck: You want me to watch Christopher?

Eddie: It's easy. He's not very fast.

Buck: After everything that happened?

Eddie: A natural disaster happened, Buck.

Buck: I lost him, Eddie.

Eddie: No, You saved him. That's how he remembers it. And now, it's his turn to do the same for you.

Buck: I was supposed to look out for him.

Eddie: And what, you think you failed? I failed that kid more times than I care to count, and I'm his father. But I love him enough to never stop trying, and I know you do too.

Eddie: Buck...there's nobody in this world I trust with my son more than you.

Eddie: Thank you for not giving up

4...

Eddie: Are you hurt? (shooting scene)

5...

Buck: Now, listen, I had an entire fire truck fall on my leg, and hey, look at me now.

Eddie: *shakes his head*

Carson: That sounds horrible.

Buck: No, horrible was the blood clots you get after. Mine was in my lung. I was coughing up blood. And they put you on these blood thinners and...

Eddie: Buck.

(I always saw this as Eddie shaking his head because Buck was making fun of what happened to him and not because Buck might scare Carson because Carson wasn't really that scared anymore at that time)

6...

Bobby and Buck arrives at the firehouse, Eddie is alone and opens his arms, waiting to hear the news.

Bobby: Clean bill of health from the docs.

Eddie: Glad to hear it.

Eddie: Show-off.

Buck: I had to do it.

Eddie: No, I know you did.

7...

Doctor: We'll do our best.

Eddie: Do more!

and of course 8...

Eddie: Because, Evan you came in here the other day and you said you thought it would have been better if it had been you who was shot. You act like you are expendable, but you’re wrong.

there's probably a lot more but these are the top ones that I can think of.

i think for someone who lived their whole life looking for purpose (and somehow putting themself in harm's way is something they are accustomed to do) and having someone who has their back, defending them not just from others but their own mind as well, consistently, is a match incomparable.

[battle-of-alberta]

Got a question for Drum to round out my camping trip themed asks! While dinosaurs aren't exactly paranormal, the current town of Drumheller does contain the hamlet and ghost town of Wayne. Have you ever brought Paula and Vulcan with you to check it out? For that matter, what's it like living by a ghost town? And what (if anything) does that do to the municipality representative that lived there?

to be continued...?

(wahoo answered in less than a year hooray!)

We did pass by Wayne on our way into Drumheller but didn't stop, by that time we were so tired and ready to go home hahaha. As usual, Drumheller belongs to @zomsaurus (and who has dibs on designing Wayne too hahaha) (let us know when you go on your research trip :) )

Some more notes...

Meta Stuff

this is kind of my feeling on what makes a personification exist. I think if a town's population was relocated or only exists in memory, their connection to our world starts to fade

(This is also why non-municipal personifications like nations would probably be a bit tougher and more resilient, to a point.)

(and I'm still concerned about something like Fort Walsh that was rebuilt as an educational tool as kind of a reanimated corpse? lol)

Wayne technically exists as part of Drumheller, like a microcosm of how Strathcona exists as part of Edmonton, so I think amalgamation is one way to cheat death also.

In Hetalia canon there has been one case where a micronation "gave up" and "went back to being a human", though I'm not sure that interpretation works with the way I do things. Interesting to think about, anyway!

A bit more on the Hetalia approach: Prussia is "retired" and it's suggested in this linked scan that he's slowly becoming increasingly mortal. Ancients like Rome will still appear in the dreams of their descendants as well.

the votes are in and the chat thinks Wayne should be half ghost like Danny Phantom

Some fun facts about Wayne

Last I heard, Wayne's population was 28 whole people! At its peak, it had about 2,500.

I think the Rosedeer Hotel / Last Chance Saloon is under new management now, but it's one of the big attractions. If you don't mind the shared washroom down the hall, perhaps the honeymoon suite is for you!

The saloon also has real bullet holes in the walls (framed), though they're from an incident in the 1970s rather than the 1910s

How is Wayne related to Red? Kid sibling? haha. Coal town origins, as is true of many ghost towns...

Waynestock is a big music festival/camping event in early September. It lasts 3 days and features about a hundred artists!

You might recognize Wayne in the movies. Shanghai Noon was partially filmed there!

Other notes...

I keep writing Drum as the "normie" or straight man of the gang even though next to anyone else he isn't normal at all, haha. He just is devoted to the scientific method, that's all! and also jesus

finally my knowledge of star trek comes through for me again on this blog B) remember, you can survive a shoot out at the OK Corral so long as you believe in yourself (though a mind meld doesn't hurt) :)

[weaper-reaper]

Eventuality Pt.7

Final Part 1, 2, 3+4, 5, 6

CW: Smut, Fluff, Angst, belly bulge, creampie, dirty talk, cunnilings, size kink, other dirty nsfw shit im sure. WC~3500

We stumbled back into the barracks away from the cold density of the night behind us. Emotions strung, frayed to the tips of our nerves. Electric shocks pricked up my back where Konig’s body pressed up into mine, urging me quicker down the hallway- his long legs unused to traveling at such a slow and torturous pace. A new kind of nervousness settled itself sharply between the joints of my ribcage as we crossed over the threshold to the front room of the small building. Something was off. 

Cedar and tobacco wafted through the hallways, it singed the inside of my nose and invaded the dry itchy depths of my throat. It wasn’t the anxious anticipation that pulled me away from Konig- it was Price. He sprung a hand out of whatever hole he hid in and jerked me by the bicep into his small office room. Konig dangerous entirety filled the frame of the doorway out behind us and blocked any light or peering eyes from seeping through. If he wasn’t his superior- I shuddered to think how he might have reacted. 

“Woah wha-“ I yelped in surprise before being tossed into a foldout chair. 

“Wait here.” Price's gruff voice held no real room for argument, so with a wary glance back over to Konig I shut my mouth. 

Smacking a hand over Königs broad shoulder, he ushered the two of them back out into the hallway, door creaking shut behind them. My thoughts raced, had someone seen us just now? ‘That’s it’ I decided, ‘Price is going to disband my practice and then murder me so I don’t retaliate.’ 

But he was back in the room within the minute, alone. I kept stealing glances back into the hallway thinking Konig was going to round his way back in. He didn’t. 

“What’s this all about, Price?” I asked, sitting up straighter in the chair and trying to seem as innocent and unlikely as possible. ‘No I definitely wasn’t just sucking one of your team members off behind the cafeteria.. don’t believe everything Soap says.’

“How’d you like a promotion?” 

It caught me off guard, my mouth hung a little agape and I squinted my eyes to see if he was lying or if it was some joke I didn’t quite get. 

“This isn’t home base, you know.” He began, as if that cleared anything up and leaned a shoulder against the wall in front of me. The cigar hung loosely between his lips, and the smoke made the room- and my eyes, go hazy. 

“I thought you didn’t want me out on the field?” I questioned, testing the waters of where our relationship stood. Last we really talked, he’d sounded disappointed in me for almost screwing the whole mission up. Which wasn’t really a surprise, seeing how Soap getting shot was completely my fault after all . 

“You do good work,” he complimented. Okay there was the surprise. “And you wouldn’t be out on the field anyway, but you’re the only one who knows my men. You’re good with them.” He said with full confidence as if I really was. 

I sat back a bit, strangely dejected by the offer. Besides a small handful- like a really really small handful, I hadn’t even made much of an effort to have a relationship with any of the others from 141. Besides Konig, Soap was the only one I had become relitivly close with, save for what some of his more stupid antics might suggest. I suppose Ghost’s warmed up to me as much as he was capable of- though I blame that on his gratefulness for patching up his previously mentioned partner. 

Then it made sense to me. Price didn’t have anyone else to ask. 

The last standby-medic seemed to have left things in such a hurry and half-done state, who knows what really happened to them? And because I knew too much about Specgru’s task force, it’s not like I could just retire and leave. No, I’d never be able to up and leave now- I’d either go AWOL or die here. 

Or die here. 

Then it made sense to me. 

Being requested by name, the effort they took to get me here, the mess with the lack of files and history that was left, my dad's sudden disappearance. Price knew him. Knew me. 

I raised a hand to the pocket where his photo didn’t sit. 

“You think this will make up for it..” my voice turned sour, unrecognizable to even me. “You were his captain.” I whispered out. 

Price nodded with conviction, the action like an admission of guilt- which it might as well have been. He took a drag of his cigar, the scent was seedy and seemed to only fuel my emotions. If he hadn’t been gone for years already, I would’ve almost let them run rampant. 

“Your old man was a hero.” He spoke softly, as if the anger boiling through my blood didn’t mean anything to him. 

“He-

“He was a father!” I shouted suddenly and stood, the metal chair clanged out from underneath me. “He was my father and you were his captain!” I don’t know why I stated the obvious again, like saying it out loud wouldn't make it any more real to me. Like I could scream loud enough and wake myself up from this dream-realization. 

“And you were supposed to protect him-

“Watch your mouth, kid!” He shouted, demeanor flipped. He scolded me with a point of his finger, cigar forgotten as it dropped to the floor. “Fuckin’..” he drawled out annoyed, bending over to pick it up and toss it on his desk with a heavy sigh. 

He turned and eyed me from over his shoulder. 

“I did everything I could, but there’s always someone who has to get dirty. That’s the job, kid.” 

I left before he’d even finished, letting the thick door slam in my wake. 

Tears didn’t brim in my eyes like I thought they would, and the grief I’d felt so long ago didn’t really rise up into my chest like it always had. There was just a silent and stale anger lingering over all the bones in my body. My skin was hot, and my fingers wouldn’t stop twitching, there were no breaths I could inhale that reached deep enough. 

I made it maybe three steps from my door before he was there, cocooning myself into his larger than life embrace. Konig shuffled us into my room and before I knew it my boots were off and we were crinkling my sheets, limbs tangled. He held me like that- my head resting on his chest, his hands playing with my fingers, until my breathing grew even and the pressure in my head dissipated. 

He kept inhaling through his mouth, in little gasps, like he was trying to find something to say. I rolled closer to him after a while, tipping my head up and fingering at the ripped holes on his mask.

“It’s okay,” I mumbled with a weak smile. “Everything's fine, I’ll tell you about it later. Okay?” 

“Later..” he mused thoughtfully like he wanted to continue, bright eyes searching mine. 

“Mmm.” I hummed and perked up to place a soft kiss on his chin over the mask. His stare held mine like they were itching to say something, and he shifted to hover above me. 

“What is it, König?” I asked, concern lacing my voice. He pressed his body closer to mine, and twisted a hand over one of mine, leaning the most of his weight on one side. 

“There’s some things I need to tell you, Maus.” His eyes drifted over to our hands- mine grew sweaty, and my heart began to race all over again. 

“Wh-“ I began, but he started before me. 

“You make my heart beat,” He confessed, low like it was a half breath or a whisper. Eyes trained on the skin of my nails, “You make my blood pump,” his voice was weak and his words trembled their way through his lips. “You make me lose control of myself, Liebling.” 

His hands shook around mine, and his eyes seemed to look everywhere around the place where I lay except my face- as if the moment he looked at me he’d never be able to form the right words. 

After a thick moment and a heavy breath he pulled at the hand he held and set it over the cloth on his face, pinching my fingers together and letting me drag it down over his skin. He was pale, and the lightest of freckles dotted the tips of his cheeks and forehead. The sight of him immediately made me swoon. This was him, and now I’d never be able to unsee it. I wanted to burn his face into every inch of my irises. I let my fingers dance over the bone of his nose, and it wrinkled under me when he scrunched it. Unused- probably- of letting anything but his mask touch it. 

I couldn’t really tell what color his hair was, in the dark of my room but it was light and cropped short, the tips barely fringing in curls over his forehead. A couple scars littered around the corners of his face, one in particular near his mouth drug up and twitched under the muscle there. 

“König..” I whispered and he finally let his eyes meet mine, they crinkled in the corners, and my stomach erupted in butterflies when he finally smiled above me. Crooked teeth and twitchy nosed. 

“Your German has gotten better.” He praised gently. Genuinely happy I could pronounce his name properly now. 

“I had a good teacher.” I pruned back, pulling his face down by his jaw to kiss him eagerly. Reaching for the comfort that only he had been able to provide. 

God how every part of me ached for the sweetness of his lips. His body untensed under my touch, and I slowly began to pull bits of our clothing off. His shirt.. my jacket.. his belt.. His body grew heavy over me, and I welcomed it. It was like an extra secure, six foot ten weighted blanket. I willingly let myself fold under him as he pressed into me. In no time our kisses grew intense and we were both pulling away to gasp for air. I tangled my hands in his hair and he moved to trail his mouth down the curve of my jaw, his hands wandered and slid down my body. I twitched when he ticked over sensitive parts, inching my thin shirt up and over my arms. 

He groaned, “I am in agony, little mouse. I need you, can you feel what you do to me?” He slotted his hips down into mine, the stiffness in his pants lined up perfectly in between my thighs and I couldn’t help the needy-sounding whine that followed. 

“The sight- the smell of you.. Scheiße, Liebling.” His touches became desperate, nails pricked against the soft of my skin and his calloused knuckles scraped down my waist. He slipped so easily in and out of German it made my head spin. 

I tugged at the fly of his zipper and he kicked them off as soon as they were loose, raising up off my body to slide mine down too. A pile of our mixed clothes formed over the dirty floor. His cock slapped up against our abdomens, it sat heavy and hot and wet between our bodies. I bucked my hips up against him- encouraging all the noises I could out of his raspy throat. His voice was muffled against my collarbone again, while he nipped at the skin there. I shuddered. 

“Please, let me taste you.” 

I bit at my bottom lip and nodded, holding eye contact with me and he licked and nipped down my body. Blatantly leaving marks and bright red bites as he went. He slipped his body down until it was completely off the foot of the bed and was kneeling on the floor. I hesitated for a moment but ultimately couldn’t feel bad for very long. 

His strong arms yanked me down the bed to his face, pulling the sheets up behind me; and my thighs snapped close over his head when his warm mouth instantly found my clit. He settled one large hand over my hip and stomach, fingers long enough to tease me while his tongue lapped up and down my folds. His other hand dug into the fat of my thigh, encouraging me to ride and grind up into his face. And I did so enthusiastically, chasing my rapidly approaching orgasm. 

He released my thigh, and sunk two digits into me, curling up immediately and rubbing harshly against the bundle of nerves that sat below my belly button. I moaned a mess of his name and curses. Suddenly it was like the room turned hot and my brain became fuzzy. 

“F-fuck König.. I’m already, I’m so close..” 

He found my clit again, and sucked at the flesh around it, three fingers scraping and rubbing the inside of my gummy walls. I trembled above him, and the cot shook- although I quickly realized he had his hand down underneath the frame of the bed, jerking himself to the movements he made his fingers mimick. 

Fuck that’s hot. 

“Wait!” I cried suddenly, pulling away. König stopped immediately, eyes flashing up to mine with eyebrows furrowed in worry- afraid he had hurt me. 

“I want to cum with you inside me.” I blurted out, too lust-drunk to even be embarrassed about what I was saying. I needed him. He hesitated, but rose up again to crawl over me, and I latched my legs around his hips, pulling him down against me. 

He kissed me again, and I humped up into him pathetically. Trying to maneuver his long torso lower so that he’d rub up against me properly. He chuckled a little at my desperate attempts to slide him inside of my slippery cunt. 

“Don't you want me?” I whined. 

“So fucking badly.” His whispers were harsh, and he let the tip of his fat cock notch against my entrance. I clenched and his grip bruised my hips in an attempt to steady me. It was silent while he pushed in until it started to burn and stretch, the both of us holding our breaths for any slight noise of uncomfortability from the other. 

A high pitched whine left me when he brushed against that spot in me again, and I felt myself tighten around him. 

“Maus..” he choked out, rubbing up and down my sides trying to soothe my body loose, “You keep p-pushing me out.” He fumbled over his words and I let my hips fall open in an attempt to relax. 

“Sorry,” I mumbled, throwing my body deeper into the mattress. “You’re so big I can't-“ I sighed and bucked my hips up suddenly, sliding him further into me. Groans from the both of us followed as he bottomed out into me, his heavy balls practically slapping against my ass. 

He cursed in German some more and I had to pry his hands from their death grip on my hips- so he opted on holding my palms flat down on each side of my head. 

He lowered his face and let his nose brush up against mine, lips barely even touching, “Can you feel it, Maus? How much my body craves yours?” 

I swallowed thickly and my core squeezed him in taut, the muscles in my lower stomach nearly cramping. I let my head fall to the side, avoiding his gaze as a new heat flushed up over my chest and neck. My wetness was clearly evident over his chin, and I shut my eyes tight. 

“Maus..” he teased, flexing his cock inside me, a moan escaped. “Please look at me.” I shook my head. 

“It’s too much.” 

“Too much?” He asked, and began to pull out. I sighed, and quickly grew the feeling of emptiness. 

I pulled him in again with my legs wrapped around his middle, slotting his hips right back down into mine. We both felt it as his head kissed the entrance of my womb. My head tossed back, and he removed a hand to place it over my stomach- up high where he sat inside of me. 

I heard him huff through his nose in a slight laugh, so I opened my eyes to peer down at where he was looking. There was a slight bulge just below my belly button. I gasped. 

“That’s not what you think it is, König.” I mumbled. 

“No?” He asked, reaching for my hand to place it under where his sat. 

“What is it then, Liebling?” He teased, pulling out and pressing down just enough that I could feel it under my palm when he pushed back in. 

“Oh fuck..” I whined, throwing my head back as he began a slow and steady rhythm. A deep rhythm that stretched me as deep and wide as I could possibly go. 

Groans and a wet slapping sound steadily began to fill the room. 

He pulled back once more to push my thighs up to my chest, almost folding me completely in half he tucked his palms under my knees. 

My muscles tensed as my orgasm approached me all over again. Konig pressed down over my folded body to smother me in rough and face paced kisses, mirroring his sloppily growing thrusts until he was rutting into me- shoving my womb up into my stomach. 

“Konig.. konig..” I cried, “Please,” 

“I know, Maus. Me too.” He grit out, teeth clenched and fingers digging into the sides of my knees. He dropped them then, and hoisted me up into his arms like a ragdoll, jerking up into me and holding me as close as he could. My arms wrapped around his face, and my legs hooked together at the ankles behind his back. 

His breaths grew rabid and his voice cracked when he spoke, “Where-

“In.” I half-shouted, half-moaned. “I have an IUD. In, I want to feel it.” 

His fingernails dug into the skin of my hips as he pulled me down one last, rather rough, time. And I came undone, spilling all over him. The waves coursed through me and Konig came under me with a guttural groan, letting my own orgasm milk his right through him. He huffed, sweaty head pressed into the center of my chest as we took out time riding out our pleasures. 

His warmth seeped down out of me, I could feel it dripping down the inside of my thighs. He didn’t press up into me so roughly anymore, but the sheer size and thickness of him still stood upright and deep inside of me. We both sighed after a minute, and he layed back-down onto the mattress with me uptop of him. Still plugged up inside of me and twitching every few minutes. 

“Thank you, Maus.” He giggled after a moment, face buried at the hair on the top of my head, a loopy grin settled over my face. I don’t know if I’ll ever get used to this. Quite frankly, I didn’t want to. I let my smile mimic his own. 

It faltered after a second, his own emotional mask falling away. 

“You okay, König?” I asked again that night and he kissed me so incredibly deeply before he answered. 

“It’s KORTAC,” he paused, eyeing me for any indication or sudden movement. His eyes held regret, “They're sending us back to Germany.” 

My breath caught in my throat, and I raised a hand to push myself upright off his chest. He slipped out of me with a wince, but he wrapped an arm around me to keep me close, the other wiping stray hair at my cheek away. 

“Germany?” I questioned, slightly stunned. 

He nodded, face falling. I racked my brain for a second. 

“That makes sense,” I said, “Price offered me a job, back at home base.” 

He eyebrows rose, then read over my expression and they quickly fell again. 

“Liebling.” He choked up, pulling me into him and rolling us over so he was smothered over me again. “My beautiful, sehr schön, little Maus.” 

Then it clicked in my overworked brain, SPECGRU and KORTAC. 

SPECGRU and … KORTAC 

And. 

Their joint mission. Price wanted me back with him at his home base, wherever that may be. And König was going back with his team. To Germany. 

“What will you do?” He asked, hovering over me slightly and covering me in kisses like it was the last time he’d ever taste my skin. 

Because it probably was. 

I lolled my head to the side and glanced at the photo that sat wilted and sad on the floor. 

A younger version of myself stared back at me, tucked safely in my dad's arms. He looked over at my kid form with those warm, inviting eyes. 

I mumbled weakly. “I have no choice, do I?”