#we need an escape goat

[idrewagiraffe]

when the study group is trying to find out who the new pierce is after he left the group, shirley is like "what about abed, abeds weird". and everyone turns to look at him, and they're all just like "nahhh it's not abed he's alright".

it's just like such a good moment for me because on any other sitcom or show the objectively "weird" character probably would have ended up being targeted and ridiculed. but abeds just a funky guy who likes tv, and everyone in the study group recognises that and instantly rules him out as a threat or 'new pierce". it's very cool.

[chalkrub]

svanhildr my beloved returns

[the-busy-ghost]

Warning- this is a very petty post, but I think I'm entitled to at least one petty, pissed-off reaction every time I finish a classic novel that hit harder than I expected so take this as my quota for the year.

Also spoiler warning for a book that came out over a century ago but still, I didn't know the plot going in so don't want to ruin it for anyone else, if you haven't read it shut your eyes. (Also Local Tumblr User Going Wild Over Book Published a Hundred Years Ago That Everybody Else Already Read should probably be categorised as akey part of indigenous tumblr culture at this point).

Anyway I just finished the War of the Worlds and in between studying I've thinking about Themes and Motifs as you do, and idly looking for further analysis. I then accidentally ran into an article called 'A Quiet Place II Succeeds Where the War of the Worlds Failed' and:

Now I haven't seen any of the Quiet Place films, this is not a rant against them and of course everyone is entitled to their own opinions. But re: the ending of The War of the Worlds, I have to ask, did this guy somehow miss, uh, the entire point of the book or am I just utterly insane?

[noble-kale]

I'm going to start with a cow. Let's see how balanced of a farm we end up with 🚜

And please share and donate to help rescue a mother and her 2 young children from a genocide that has already taken the children's father and has made all 3 sick from unhygienic conditions.

art raffle + personal items raffle + flyers

[lynxgriffin]

Eldritchrune - Dreemurr of Jokes

1 | 2 | 3

Story Setup Eldritchrune Masterpost

Toriel stops by Sans' shop for some goods, and for some more cheery distractions! Unfortunately, all this time later, it's still too difficult to escape reminders of what's been done.

It was fun finally getting to do some stuff with Sans in this universe! The last part for this trio of scenes will be up sometime next week!

Alt text for these pages is under the read more:

Page 1 Panel 1: Interior shot of a small store, with displays of goods, loose plywood, sacks of things. Two circular woven hangings bracket the door through which Toriel enters, a heavyset woman in a polka-dotted dress with a basket over her arm. Sans watches her enter, though we see only the back of his head. 

Panel 2: Toriel enters the shop and we see more displays, mostly food. There are large potted trees as well, and the shop’s counter, draped in patterned cloth and decorated with candles. Toriel: “Well, hello again. I was wondering if you had-” Sans, a jovial, bearded man dressed in loose robes and always smiling, waves a hand and cuts her off. “Hold on, you hear that?”

Panel 3: “...Hear what?” Toriel asks, nonplussed. Up close, her face is soft but distressed.

Panel 4: Sans leans over his slightly messy counter, still grinning. “I HERB that you needed some more cinnamon cloves, and look what I have here!” He offers a handful of herbs. Up close, the cuffs on his robe sleeves are patterned with little bones.  

Panel 5: “Just what I needed! How did you guess?” Toriel exclaims, reaching out with a real smile to accept the herbs. She and Sans are framed by other mysterious shop wares- jars of things, open sacks, rolled-up mats. Things you might find in an open-air desert market. 

Page 2 Panel 1: Sans: “Was just thinking it’d been awhile since I saw you making the neighborhood rounds with some of those pies of yours… Figured you were planning to start this month’s soon!” Sans gestures up at Toriel in explanation. 

Panel 2: Toriel smirks, setting down a handful of coins.  “And perhaps hoping that I would stop by your place first with them?” Sans: “I pride myself on my forward thinking, y’know.” His grin is conspiratorial as he leans towards her and he taps his temple with one finger. 

Panel 3: Toriel, eyes sad despite her smile: “All right. How about this: Tell me a good joke, and you have my word you will have the first and freshest one.”

Panel 4: Sans: “Just a good joke?” He raises an eyebrow. 

Panel 5: Toriel clutches her chest- we don’t see her eyes. “I find myself in desperate need of levity these days.” 

Panel 6: Sans waves his hand as if to keep her from feeling like she need say more, scratching his chin in thought with the other.  “Sure, I got one…” 

Page 3 Panel 1: Sans, with the smug grin of someone about to tell a terrible pun: “Why was the empire soldier happy to get demoted to horse groomer?” Toriel, with her hand on her chin in thought: “I do not know, why?” 

Panel 2: Sans shrugs widely like the answer is obvious. “Because he finally had STABLE employment!” 

Panel 3: Toriel laughs in genuine delight, although maybe a little harder than expected. 

Panel 4: Toriel: “Thank you, I needed that.” She smiles a relieved little smile. Sans: “No problem. So hey, aside from the pie… Can I maybe get an invite to those little get-togethers I see some folks around here doing once a month?” He steeples his fingertips together. 

Panel 5: San’s dialogue continues: “I’m so curious as to what goes on then!” We only see Toriel, though, shocked and dismayed. She’s thinking of the Ritual gatherings- townspeople gathered in their robes and animal masks- reindeer, fish, but most centrally, the goat masks she and Asgore wear. 

Panel 6: Toriel: “Unless you are completely enraptured by tedious talk of planting schedules and building repairs, I believe I can sate your curiosity by saying you would find them quite boring.” She waves a hand in front of her, dismissing the thought- her expression is once again drawn and weary. 

Page 4 Panel 1: Toriel turns to leave, waving goodbye. “You should look forward to your well-earned pie more!” 

Panel 2: Sans gives her a slightly skeptical look. “Alright.” is all he says. 

Panel 3: As she leaves, Toriel looks down and sees for the first time a small statue set by the door, surrounded by candles- it’s not a merchandise display, more like an altar. The statue is a horned figure holding a bowl filled with greenery- an offering of some type. The figure is rounded like a sitting child, and simple, with closed eyes and little other detail. 

Panel 4: Toriel’s dialogue over a close up shot of the figure: “What an interesting little figure you have. It does not look like it is for sale, is it?” The little horned one has three toes and four fingers on its stubby little arms and legs, and a detail on its forehead that could be a suggestion of hair, or it could be a symbol. The pillar candles surrounding it have been burned enough to have long wax drips pooled around them. 

Panel 5: Sans: “Nah, that’s just a holdover from my home country. Supposed to help keep demons out of your space.” He seems uninterested in this bit of lore, but Toriel, still facing away, is wide-eyed and shaken.

Panel 6: Toriel whirls back to him, sweating. “I-Is that so?” 

Panel 7: Sans’s expression intensifies, eyebrows dropping dramatically. “Sure thing. You know what happens when demons get in your grain stores?” 

Page 5 Panel 1: “They’re OATsolutely RYE-ined!” Sans holds his hands wide, like he’s waiting for the rimshot effect. It’s almost like his shop counter and back wall are suddenly a stage. 

Panel 2: Toriel hides a giggle behind her hand, relieved. 

Panel 3: “Is that something you have had to deal with previously?” she asks, stepping a little closer in her interest. Sans makes a slight gesture of dismissal. “Nah, I don’t really go in for that sort of stuff, honestly.”

Panel 4: Sans: “My brother, though… He’s all in on charms and wards and that sort of thing.” He gestures up, as if to point to wherever it is in the town that his brother might be now. 

Panel 5: “Keeping customs from your home country, I suppose?” Toriel asks, drawn again into the shop and closer to Sans. “Something like that,” he responds, leaning forward on his counter. On the wall next to him, there’s another woven wall hanging like the ones over the door.  Toriel: “Do you have any customs that have a reverse effect?” 

Panel 6: Sans looks as skeptical as one can while constantly grinning. “You mean like, if you want demons in your house?” 

Page 6 Panel 1: Toriel puts a hand up in denial. “N-No, that would obviously be undesirable! I meant more… just out of curiosity about your home.” 

Panel 2: Sans stares up at her, for a beat of silence. 

Panel 3: “Maybe? Again, this stuff isn’t my thing.” He leans back in his chair with his hands behind his head, nonchalant as can be. “And anyways, we left our country for a reason. Old customs aren’t relevant in this town, y’know?” 

Panel 4: Toriel once again turns to go, with a rueful smile. “Maybe not… but I cannot imagine letting go of your entire history.”

Panel 5: Sans shrugs and looks away. “There’s worse things to let go of, honestly.” 

Panel 6: Toriel, gritting her teeth, thinks of a happier time tucking Kris into bed. 

Panel 7: Close on Toriel’s expression, now more haggard and pained than it was when she came in. She clutches her chest tight. 

[ponderingmoonlight]

hi! how would gojo react to having a partner who struggles to walk sometimes (like needing a break if they’ve been up for too long or their legs randomly failing)

„I’m sorry, I need to sit down.“

You almost fail to understand your own words, ears ringing so violently that you feel like throwing up any given minute.

You’re weak. No matter how you twist and turn it, no matter how supportive your boyfriend is, you’ll always stay weak. Is it an illness, was it an accident? You can’t put a finger on it, mind occupied by nothing but shame and dizziness.

“Don’t apologize for that.”

His arm keeps you from falling over the bench you collapsed onto, holds you in place while you pray for your wobbly legs to regain their strength.

“I’m sorry”, you mumble again.

This definitely isn’t what the strongest jujutsu sorcerer of your lifetime signed up for when he fell in love with you. No, you can’t even walk properly, legs failing you randomly from time to time. Your glossy eyes dart towards him, how he sits next to you with a gentle smile on his face. Well, Satoru doesn’t seem to mind.

But you do.

“Didn’t ya hear m-“

“I’m weak”, you finally blurt out.

Countless times, you put on a show for him, laughed it off when your body once again failed you. But you’ve had enough. Fuck, how much you prayed to be normal, that Shoko might be able to heal you. How are you supposed to be the girlfriend you want to be for him when you aren’t even able to walk a mile without almost breaking down?

“How dare you to say something like this about my girlfriend? She’s awesome”, he jokes gently while his arm holds onto your waist even tighter.

Not even his cute little jokes are enough to get you out of this hole today. You sink into yourself, hands covering your aching eyes. He deserves way better than that, someone who’s able to keep up with him, someone he doesn’t have to worry about? But you? Your throat gets tight with every passing second, tears glistening in your eyes.

You’re nothing but a loser.

“Hey, look at me.”

He doesn’t give you a choice. With a swift motion, he holds onto your chin, forces you to look up at him and reveal the shame of your tears. Will he even want you after seeing you like this?

“You’re not weak because your body can’t keep up, okay? You’re not a worse person because you need a break. If I had a sharp mind like yours, I’d literally sacrifice everything else. You are the love of my life, (y/n). And I know exactly that you’re tearing yourself apart with your dumb thoughts. You are great, okay? Fuck that little breaks from here and there. Man, I wouldn’t have noticed that goat standing right there between the trees if we didn’t take a break here. Like are you seeing this?”

A little giggle escapes your lips before you can stop it, eyes darting towards the animal.

“You’re right”, you breathe out.

“See? Now stop what you’re doing there and tell me when you’re ready to go again, okay?”

[sometimesanalice]

Like I Can (Part 1)

Summary: After yet another bad date and tired of swiping on apps, the Dagger Squad steps in to help you out by setting you up on a series of blind dates. Much to Rooster’s dismay.

Warnings: fuff, slight angst. Minors DNI

Length: 3.2K

Pairing: Bradley “Rooster” Bradshaw X Female Reader

Part 2

(We’re kicking of Valentine’s Day a bit early❣️ Enjoy!)

“I’m all for growing the sport, but Brady buying an MLP team is ruining the integrity of the league. He may be the GOAT of football, but he has nothing on Ben John’s world-class pickleball game,” your date Max passionately states from his spot across from you at the Italian place he had recommended.

Or was his name Mac?

He’d already told you all about the CRBN paddle drama. At this point, you wouldn’t be surprised if he had already prepared a PowerPoint presentation on the topic complete with transitions and color-coded charts. He seems the type.

And he had yet to ask you a single question about yourself all evening.

You can tell he is gearing up for the next part of his rant, when your phone lights up on the table, the ringer on higher than you realized.

“Oh! I’m sorry, I thought I had this on silent. It’s my mom, I should probably take this,” you apologize to him, your phone already halfway raised to your ear.

“Hey, kid, how’s it going?”

“Hi Mom, I’m with someone right now. Is everything ok?” You let a little worry tinge the tone of your voice.

“Seriously?” Rooster drolly rasps on the other end of the line, “Are we actually doing this?”

“Oh no! Is she alright?” You wouldn’t consider yourself actress, but you think you’re really selling the performance with the way you widen your eyes and how you make your voice go a little tighter and higher.

“Yup, seems like we’re really doing this. What’s it this time, kid? Did grandma slip on a banana peel and then get run over by a reindeer?” You can practically feel his eyes rolling as he begrudgingly goes along with you.

“Oh my goodness, that sounds serious! How would that even happen?” you ask, shaking your head in in faux shock determined to really sell the act.

“Is everything ok?” Max-Mac whispers to you from across the table. 

His profile didn’t raise any red flags when you’d swiped on him. If anything, he’d seemed a bit more of the beige flag type. Your chats had been fine, he seemed fine, so why not meet up for a date?

What you didn’t realize until it was too late was that “Sports Enthusiast” actually translated to “Pickleball Fanatic”.

“Hold on, Mom,” you hear Rooster scoff as you pull the phone away from your ear. “I’m so sorry, there’s been a family emergency. It’s my grandmother. I really need to go,” you announce to Mac-Max grabbing your purse from the back of the chair. “Thank you so much for understanding. And good luck at your pickleball tournament!” you call back to him as you hustle towards the front door.

“I take it you’ve made your escape?” You can hear the humor in his voice, your antics are nothing new to him.

“Oh my god, was that seriously only thirty minutes? He wouldn’t stop talking about pickleball, Rooster. Anytime I tried to change the subject, he found a way to circle right back to it!” You tell him as you attempt to dig your keys out from where they were buried in your bag. “And then, he pulled up the leg of his jeans and said, I kid you not: ‘Don’t worry, this isn’t an ankle monitor, I’m just wearing my ankle weights.’ Who does that?”

“Just come to the Hard Deck. You should have canceled like I told you to in the first place. Bob and Coyote got back the other day, so everyone’s here. Well, almost everyone,” he says pointedly. “We’re more fun anyways. And Hangman has been harassing me about you, something about your fluke of a win?”

You’d kicked Jake’s ass the last time you played darts with him. Although in his defense, he had been pretty drunk that night and it was a less than fair game since Phoenix would distract him while Fanboy moved your darts on the board.

You wouldn’t be challenging him to a rematch anytime soon. Not unless the odds were in your favor, it was better to keep him on his toes and his ego in check.

Thankful for the princess parking you managed to snag when you first arrived, you unlock your car and toss your bag into the passenger seat before climbing in. Breathing out a sigh of relief to be done with Mac-Max once inside.

“You back in your car yet?” Rooster asked. He was such a worrier, but you can’t say it bothered you. You liked knowing he cared.

“Yeah, just got in.”

“Ok good, see you in a few. Drive safe, kid.”

Thirty minutes later Natasha was sliding a cold, frothy pint in front of you with a sympathetic look.

It wasn’t too busy at the Hard Deck yet, but it was still early in the evening. You knew it would pick up soon, and before long Penny would be ringing her bell on some rowdy unsuspecting customer.

“Ankle weights?” She asked, trying and failing to keep from laughing at your expense.

“Seriously, Rooster?” you shoot a glare in his direction, “Where’s the loyalty?”

“What? She was right there when I called you. A request that was your idea, if you remember,” he said as he walked up to you, squeezing your shoulder before sliding his arm around you in greeting. “Plus, it’s not like you don’t already tell Phoenix about all your escapades. You really know how to pick ‘em, kid.”

You’ve known Bradley “Rooster” Bradshaw since before you had braces back when you were still wearing your hair in two braids. Your moms had been on the school PTA together at the time and had hit it off immediately.

He hadn’t been too happy about being forced to hang out with the kid who was couple years younger than him, especially one who was so clearly enamored with the cute older boy. While you’d outgrown that phase, for the most part, somethings stuck- like the nickname. 

And over the years you’d formed your own bond outside of the forced proximity of your mothers’ friendship.

He’d taught you how to throw a punch, the different ways to pitch a baseball, and to drive a stick shift. You’d taught him how to whistle with his fingers, to play Nerts, and to tie a tie (after asking your dad to teach you).

The give and take was easy with him, you both showed up for the other.

You were there the night he drunkenly fell through the glass patio door at Jason Cameron’s homecoming party. As one of the only sober people there since he wouldn’t let you drink, or let anyone else give you alcohol for that matter, you were the one to take him to the ER. “Don’t worry, kid,” he had slurred, pressing the Washington High t-shirt that you’d found in your trunk to his face to stop the bleeding, “Looks s’worse than it feels.” And you were the one to stay with him as he was stitched up. The evidence of that night still unmistakable on his face.

He was there for you when your parents had sat you down and told you they were getting a divorce. A hurricane of angst and grief, you hadn’t left your room for anything other than school for over a week when he’d let himself in your room one afternoon. Rubbing small circles on your back as he’d let you cry for a bit, he didn’t even tease you about the stains you’d left behind on his shirt. And then he’d herded you into his crappy car and drove you to the slightly sketchy amusement park an hour away with the Tilt-A-Whirl and the giant corndogs. And when he’d told you “It’s going to be ok, kid” on the ride back home, you believed him.

You had been there for him when his mom passed, and all during that dark period after when he was set on self-destruction after his fallout with Maverick. While he had tried to push everyone away, you were always the type to hold on tightly to the people that mattered.

And then life had sent you on different directions. First when he went to college and then when you did. Next for him the Navy, and then you with your own career, both of you always in motion. You two shared a connection the way people with a long history do, the kind where you could go months without talking but knowing the other person is always right there if you need them. Your camaraderie sustained by texts, email, and the occasional FaceTime.

A long-distance friendship for over a decade.

So when your boss had approached you about a promotion that was dependent on you relocating to the West Coast, you thanked whatever kismet in the universe had you packing for San Diego where he was permanently stationed.

The break up with your boyfriend at the time was entirely too amicable considering how long you had been together. He was nice, the sex was nice, your life together was nice. You had all but signed the paperwork for your promotion when you told him, but he didn’t see himself as a west-coaster and you couldn’t envision yourself as anything but. Whether you had stayed together all that time out of convenience or complacency, you still couldn’t say.

It was easy to fall back into the comfort of your friendship with Rooster. Although the lanky teen you had known was replaced with a mustache sporting well-built man courtesy of the Navy. One that had left you feeling confusingly flustered on more than one occasion, and forced to cycle through your mental highlight reel of embarrassing teen Rooster moments to keep from your mind from wandering.

He’d helped you find your apartment, taught you about avoiding the 15 Northbound, and showed you where the best place in town to get tacos was. The transition was made easy with him by your side as he introduced you to his team members who quickly folded you into their group as one of their own.

That was a little over a year ago. You liked this new life of yours in San Diego.

And while the dating pool of men you could swipe through was much larger, well, some things never changed.

“You don’t get it, Rooster. You’re surrounded by absurdly hot Naval eye candy all day,” you complained gesturing to Natasha, she raised her beer to you as thanks in response. “While you’re getting women throwing themselves at you because of the gold wings, I’m fighting for my life on these stupid apps where all the men on there are posing with fish. It’s brutal!”

You’d need to officially call things off with Max-Mac later, thinking to yourself how glad you were that you never gave him your real number, and instead signing up for a Google voice number. You were just not cut out for the competitive pickleball lifestyle.

“Bradshaw, why don’t you set her up? It’s not like we don’t know enough people who would be better options than these fish men,” Natasha asked, like it was the most logical thing in the world, raising an eyebrow at him.

“Yeah, Bradshaw. Tell Nat your super logical reasons for leaving your longtime friend to fend for herself.” You knew where this was heading, so you took a long swig of the beer Phoenix had brought you.

“Seriously, not this again.” His arm that was around you was removed in favor for pinching the bridge of his nose and looking up to the ceiling like it would spare him from the conversation.

“You started it, now tell her.”

“I need another damn drink if we’re going to do this,” Rooster mumbled.

“Me too,” chimed Natasha, clearly reveling in his misery.

“Make that three. I need to catch up.” You hadn’t even stuck around long enough to get a drink at the restaurant, and now you were ready to let loose a bit.

He grunts out some unintelligible thing and then stalks off to the bar shaking his head.

“I’m an upstanding citizen, I pay my taxes, I make a mean peanut butter brownie, and I always drive him around when the Bronco is in the shop for a tune up. It’s literally the least he could do,” you say to Phoenix as you watch him chat with Penny as she works to grab the fresh bottles.

“Oh, so this is thing,” Natasha says decidedly when she eyes the six beers he’s carrying back to the table, three bottles held by the neck in each of his large hands. His classic Hawaiian shirt fluttering with every step, your eyes briefly drifting down to his defined waist.

“Sure is,” you confirm, drawing out the word. Downing the rest of the beer from your pint glass before reaching for one of the new bottles Rooster was divvying out amongst your trio, “I’ve never asked him for anything-”

“That is a boldfaced lie. And you know it,” he cuts in, as he hands you a granola bar from his pocket, that he must have snagged from Penny. “You definitely asked me to set you up with Kyle Cooke from my baseball team in high school. I didn’t do it then, and I’m not doing it now,” he declared, pointing at you with an accusatory finger to further drive the statement home.

“Reasons being?” Natasha wheedled, a mischievous smirk on her face. You could tell she was eating this up, there were two things Natasha Trace loved most in this world: juicy gossip and giving Rooster a hard time.  

Ever the showman, he dramatically lifts up a finger, “First of all, everyone I know is an asshole.”

“I am offended on Bob’s behalf,” you countered, unwrapping the bar and taking a bite, annoyed. Hangman might fit the description, but certainly not Bob.

“Two,” he continues on, raising a second finger, and ignoring you completely as if you hadn’t just made a very valid point, “Let’s say I set you with a friend and then you end up hating them. Then you’ll judge me for being friends with them, we’ll argue, and eventually we won’t be friends anymore. Or even worse, I set you up with someone, you hit it off and date for a while. What happens when you break up? I’m left having to pick sides and walk on eggshells around you guys about the other person.”

“God, you’re such a overthinker. That all sounds totally rational, you drama queen,” you look to Phoenix for agreement, but she’s busy typing out a text message on her phone.

“And three, it’s messy as fuck. And I don’t need to hear about your trophy of a one-night stand.”

Now it’s your turn to roll your eyes, “That was one time! It wasn’t a trophy it was a gold medal.”

“Wait, what?” Confusion coloring Natasha’s features. 

“One time this guy gave me one of those plastic gold medal things on a lanyard, kind of like the ones they give out at kids soccer games, after we hooked up. I mean, kicked him out right away, but I did keep the medal. It was a good confidence boost,” you shrug.  It wasn’t exactly a high point moment for you.

After that encounter you’d definitely started scrutinizing every profile a bit harder before swiping right, or at least you thought you had been. In your defense, at least Max-Mac’s profile didn’t have a fish photo, but the bar was still clearly on the ground.

“I knew you when you wore those shirts with that big mouthed monkey on them. And that’s the kind of shit I don’t need to know about. I don’t wanna be involved. Not gonna happen, kid,” his declaration resolute.

“Well, that sure is something, Bradshaw,” Natasha states, giving him a curious look.

“What are y’all over here discussing so intently,” Hangman questions as he saddles up to your little group, tucking his phone into his pocket. 

“We were just getting into the finer details of the kid’s dating life and how I am going to fix it by setting her up with this great guy I know,” she pronounces, looking all too pleased with herself. A truly self-satisfied grin gracing her face.

Natasha Trace was probably the most bad ass person you’ve ever met, so the idea of her setting you up with someone had you sitting up straighter on the stool you were seated on, “Really?”

“Who?” Rooster demands, frowning at her.

“Yeah, I mean Bradshaw clearly has his convictions, and I respect that. However, I’m an excellent wing-woman. Seriously, I don’t know why I haven’t thought about introducing you guys before. You two would be perfect together.”

Hangman never one to miss an opportunity to rile up Rooster is quick to jump in, “Just because you fly in a two-seater doesn’t make you a good wing-woman, Phoenix. However, now that you mention it, I have a buddy who might knock your socks off. Unless you’d rather just knock boots, I’m sure he’d be up for whatever you wanted,” he shooting you a wink. “I think I’ll toss my name in the ring here too. After all, I’m very good.”

“You want to make it a bet, Bagman?” Her accent always got a little more pronounced when she went toe to toe with him.

“What’re you thinkin’, Darlin’?” he drawls suggestively with a sharp smile. That ever-present toothpick being rolled in his mouth from side to side.

“You guys are not going to be making bets around the kid’s love life,” Rooster snaps.

“The big dogs are talking, Bradshaw,” Hangman taunts as he waves him off.  

“$50 entry? The dates happen here and at the end the kid picks which date was the best. Winner takes all?” You can see the competitive gleam in her eye.

“Alright, alright. Works for me, Phoenix. I can’t wait to take your money.”

“The hell you are,” Rooster barks, still trying to regain control of the quickly spiraling situation.

Well, this had certainly taken a turn.

You find yourself reaching for your third beer of the night.

And you’re even more surprised when Hangman hollers for the rest of the team to join, and before you know it your dating life takes centerstage as the subject of the bet between the group of competitive naval aviators. Many of the others deciding to join in, never ones to shy away from a bit of rivalry.  

“What do you say? You up for it?” Natasha asks, wanting to make sure you were still on board now that her original offer had taken on a life of its own.

You look over and see Rooster looking at you like you’d be crazy to get involved in their kind of chaos. You know he can already tell what your answer will be.

“Why not?” you agree cheerily as he groans into his beer.

At least you would be spared from swiping for a while. It’s what you deserve, you are an upstanding citizen after all.

Get ready for some dates! Part 2

Written as part of @roosterforme’s #Love Is In The Air TGM Fic Challenge! 

Song Inspiration Sam Smith’s “Like I Can”.

Thank you Jordan (@gretagerwigsmuse) for letting me bounce ideas off of you!

Edit: I’ve started a tag list for Part 2! Just let me know if you’d like to be added!

[a-dauntless-daffodil]

in fear of what awaits from @val-the-bun's AU, i dream up were-harpy Vaggie chaggie FLUFF to prepare myself

and also Razzle and Dazzle are here. whether they wanna be or not :D

Big scary harpy Vaggie repeatedly trying to “nest” Charlie’s little demon goats whenever Razzle and Dazzle show up to help Charlie with the whole “Giant Murder Bird Monster” situation

First time she lunged at them Charlie’s heart STOPPED

bc Razzle and Dazzle are hellborn they won't pull themselves back together if torn apart and why didn't Charlie think of that and does harpy Vaggie know that and is she about to kill th-

Nope!

Charlie’s weird new roommate grabs Dazzle by the scruff of his neck fur and shoves him deep into the pillow nest she spent two hours arranging Just So

Then harpy Vaggie chases Razzle around the room until she can do the same with HIM

By that point Dazzle had climbed free and when harpy Vaggie saw him escaping she SCREECHED and fluffed up

and THIS time after stuffing him back in the nest, she also herded Charlie over to “sit” on him

This was needed bc Razzle had taken the chance to escape too, taking off with a lot more speed than his brother, vanishing into the rest of the house while harpy Vaggie was busy

If he was hoping for out of sight out of mind he was wrong

Harpy Vaggie scents the air and goes hunting after him, making low soothing “coo” sounds and the occasional frustrate  SQUAWK when the “chick” keeps running away from her

Charlie relaxes in the nest with Dazzle, heart rate slowly returning to normal, smiling in relief at the noise of harpy Vaggie crashing into things and breaking stuff somewhere in the house during her determined pursuit of Snuggle Times

A grumpy Razzle is finally brought to the nest clamped FIRMLY in Vaggie’s jaws (not a scratch on him) (plenty on Vaggie though, feathers ruffled from getting hit with falling debris)  

And as Harpy Vaggie shoves her prisoner into the pillows before sitting over him (again very firmly) (sulking Razzle only kept in place by her weight while Dazzle snoozes peacefully under Charlie’s arm) Charlie risks reaching up to scratch the ridge of feathers over harpy Vaggie’s eye, making the demon bird monster slowly droop and fall over with head landing in Charlie’s lap

Charlie could get used to this~

She thinks, until Vaggie starts trying to FEED the “demon goat baby chicks”, and breaks out of a window to go eviscerate a sinner for their dinner

The sinner wouldn’t have minded so much

(vaggie swooped in from behind and made it quick so they honestly felt more surprise than pain)

but harpy Vaggie also insisted on taking their liver away with her afterwards

Charlie had leaped through the broken window after her, chased her down on hoof half way across the pride ring, and then spent half an hour trying to get her bird monster roommate to stop sticking her head into the sinners ribcage rummaging around for treats and come home already

Charlie did NOT have the energy to argue about the organ theft, but promised the sinner they’d return it soon

back home, harpy Vaggie tried feeding the liver to Charlie’s “kids”, getting more and more anxious and wound up each time they refused

Charlie’s solution was to plead for her plushie demon friends’ cooperation in a very gory stage magic trick

Razzle and Dazzle glumly pretend to ‘eat’ the organ, letting Charlie scoop it up and yeet it out the window while harpy Vaggie preened in satisfaction before stuffing the “chicks” back in the nest again

This horrified the Charlie, since harpy Vaggie was still covered in blood and gore

Charlie: “Noooooo no no no, Vaggie! Ew! We need to clean you up first before snuggle t- UGH NO DON’T LICK THE BLOOD OFF YOURSELF!!”

Sadly, giant bird monsters do not fit into your average sized bathroom for showers and scrubbies

So annoyed harpy Vaggie was herded up onto the roof by Charlie while Razzle and Dazzle connected the gardening hose

Charlie: “Oh stop hissing, I made the water the same temperature as a the, ugh, blood spray from earlier. You’ll be FINE.”

Harpy Vaggie: (clacks jaws and starts biting at the water)

Charlie: “That’s fine too. I literally don’t care HOW we do this as long as you Don't get guts all over the freshly washed pillow nest the moment Razzle and Dazzle take them out of the dryer.”

Harpy Vaggie: (SCREECH)

Charlie: “Look I’m SORRY we took apart your nest and you’ll have to spend forever getting it just right again-"

Harpy Vaggie: (SCREECH AGAIN)

Charlie: "I'm sorry! But I am NOT snuggling up with fresh bloodstains, Vaggie!”

Harpy Vaggie: (hissssss)

Charlie: “No! Now let’s scrub your talons so we can get this over with an dry YOU off!”

One traumatic failed attempt at using the hair dryer on Vaggie’s many, MANY soaking wet feathers later...

Demon Charlie: “HOLY SHIT IM JUST TRYING TO HELP YOU!!!”

Harpy Vaggie: (CAW) (CAW) (C- coo?)

Demon Charlie: “WHAT?” (deep breath) “What is it? The hair dryer not so terrifying after all?”

Harpy Vaggie: (edges closer)

Demon Charlie: “It’s okay, see? It won’t hurt- Hey!”

Harpy Vaggie: (snags hair dryer in jaws and bashes it to the ground)

Demon Charlie: “Fuck! Vaggieeee- Now how are we going to get you dry!? You’ll be miserable and wet all night like this!”

Demon Charlie: “…are you cuddling up to my angry hell fire flames, Vaggie.”

Harpy Vaggie: (coo)

Demon Charlie: “The hair dryer is too scary and has to die, but my literal demonic hellfire is nice and good for snuggling with? Really?”

Harpy Vaggie: (starts preening)

Demon Charlie: “I’d think that was so sweet, if my hair drying hadn’t just been killed before my eyes.”

Harpy Vaggie: (starts trying to preen charlie)

Demon Charlie: “Aww okay okay!” (laughs) “It’s cute even with the wanton destruction of personal property~ And I’m VERY honored to be your preferred method of getting all warm and fluffy again~”  

Next harpy time, Charlie boarded up all the windows and rigged a box of donuts up with some decoy clothes and string so she could make it “run” down the hallway while harpy Vaggie pounced on it

(both had been Vaggie’s ideas, once she heard what happened with the liver incident)

And while harpy Vaggie looked a bit confused at the meal she brought back to the pillow nest

(why did the guts smell and taste like raspberry jelly???)

seeing Razzle and Dazzle dig into the offering so hungrily made her puff up again with satisfaction, which made Charlie breathe a sigh of relief and then laugh too, and from then on a pretty comfortable routine for harpy nights got established

(and if normal Vaggie was once caught sandwiching a piece of very rare steak between two donut halves as a snack, well, it probably wasn’t the worst thing hell had ever seen)

(probably)        

Charlie really likes her weird new sinner roommate anyway~

(Vaggie stays awake at night after each de-harpy-ing, finding herself snuggled up with the princess of the people her every instinct is telling her to go back to killing and wonders if not being loose on the streets of hell regularly doing more murder is enough to balance out receiving so much kindness from the last person who should ever have to show her any)

(the person who would be fully justified in throwing her out or keeping her locked in a cage if she was ever told the truth of that Vaggie is- was- is no matter how hard she tries not to be-)

(coward. selfish)

(she wants to help Charlie redeem sinners)

(she'll be putting those sinners in danger of their immortal lives if she lives anywhere near them)

(except... when Charlie's there, making her feel safe instead of bloodthirsty...

(... maybe she can be safe to be around)

(maybe keeping quiet is her only way to have a chance to do something good for a change)

(she tells Charlie in the morning that it was being in harpy mode that wore her out so much, and left her with a smile so sad)

[theminecraftbee]

At this point, is Doc worshiping 2 Gods? The Goat mother, and Big Salman. We should get him to play VH and add 4 more to that

somewhere on tumblr there's this excellent post i don't know how to find anymore from the order of octa days about how one of doc's recurring character traits is really wanting there to be a god he can rail against and that will strike him down. it's not really atheism, because he absolutely believes those gods are there. it isn't even really the hubris to think he won't enrage the gods by trying to be better than them, or to think he'll escape their wrath. it's like he actively invites their wrath. having the gods be angry at him is proof he's doing what he wants, i think. if he isn't making a god angry, then he's not doing it correctly. sure, he can commit crimes against nature, but nature needs to hit back.

anyway what i'm saying is: yeah we absolutely need to get him to play vault hunters and end up with a bizarre relationship with the vault gods, you're so right.

[shapard]

Feather of Fate🕊️

Lucifer x seraphim!fem!reader

Soulmate arc

Soft Lucifer

They talk in honesty

A/n: When someone wants to request something, go on!

Eternal Sunshine

Chapter 10 > Epilogue

Saying that Lucifer got over protective is an understatement. He always was at least one feet away from you.

Lucifer created a little goat guardian for you, when he wasn’t there and able to protect you. 

You named her Lammy. 

Lucifer always said that it was a boring name. You should name her Shazam or something similar, which you gladly declined. 

Lammy may be a simple name but it is a cute one for your cute little white-brownish goat. She had two small pairs of fairy wings and a pink bowtie. 

You loved your little Lammy and hugged it 24/7 which made Lucifer a little Jealous. 

When Lucifer was there Lammy wasn't allowed on the bed.

Husk and Angel dust were more than happy that you’re alive. They didn’t even let you move an inch. 

And now you were crouched down to the medicine cabinet, because the pain on your back was too much.

“Luce! Where are the pain killers?” You shouted as you looked in the small medicine cabin, you couldn’t find your medications anymore.

A golden shimmer appeared next to you and Lucifer descended from it. 

“They should be in here Apple pie. Why do you need them?” He asked as he crouched down to your level and helped to find the medications. 

“I have pain on my Shoulder.” The pain was on your shoulder blades reminding you of your missing pairs of wings, with a disappointed sigh you sat down on the red carpet. 

“Is there anything more you want to talk about darling?” Lucifer asked out of worry. Since a couple of days, he watched you closely as you sometimes looked outside with a sad expression on your face. You talked a lot less and sometimes you weren’t listening anymore to him. 

“It’s nothing Important.” That was a half lie. 

Even though you and Lucifer were very close and loved each other dearly, there was still a big elephant in the room. 

What was that with Lilith? 

And the way you thought about your wings, you missed them dearly. Now you know how Maleficent when she lost her wings from her own Lover, except it wasn’t Lucifers fault.

“I can see that you’re lying honey.” He snorted and chuckled and took your soft hands in his black clawed ones. “If you don’t want to share that’s okay. Only when you’re ready.” His voice was smooth like butter and his soft lips kissed your forehead softly. 

You take a deep shaky breath, “When I was in that Playhouse. Azrael showed me something.” Lucifer slit eyes switched onto your shaking hands, no doubt was that a very Traumatic event. 

He held them tight letting you know that he’s there for you and will protect you this time. “What has he shown you?” He asked carefully as he watched your eyes fill with sadness, a feeling that clenched around his heart in a hard force.

“You and Lilith, you two were kissing. Meanwhile I-“ A sob escaped your throat, and you laid your head on his chest. 

A pang of guilt resides in Lucifer as he stroked your back in circular motion. “I am sorry my Apple pie. I really hoped you didn’t see that accident, but I guess it was planned."

"She forced herself on me and right after I took care of her that she’ll never show herself back here. Please believe me.” His face was pressed on your hair and he took a deep breath in.

Well, you believe him. You believe him more than you do Azrael, you don’t even know him. 

Michael was dead, he was killed by his own twin brother Lucifer. 

How Ironic. 

You stayed in Lucifers arms a while until your cries calmed down. “Sorry to ruin your day.” Lucifer shook his head and chuckled, “You haven’t ruined anything! Besides we still have the whole night.” 

You started to blush, and your body started to heat up. 

A spark started to swirl on your back, and you felt something coming out. With a quick motion you grabbed some familiar soft feathers on your back and Lucifer whistled. 

“Seems you got your wings back cutie.” He bit his lips and brushed his clawed fingers softly down your Humerus towards the Manus and your body grew hotter every second. 

“Kinda Hot I gotta admit.”

A/n: I wanted to write smut in here but decided against it.

This is the most Pixelated image I've seen in my whole life. Neitherless a God piece.

💫

Sadly I couldn't tag you

@ayanazoldyck @marydragneell @lunaryasha @cherry-cola-100 @lxkeee @latersgaters-steven @fandom-crashlanding @cupidsgift @steadyconnoisseurnacho @crimsonflameproxy @stormz369 @wooleypeaches @fukingsad @starlitvenus @avadakadabra93 @itzabbeym @asmodeussimpnumber1 @sirenetheblogger @k1y0yo @i-have-no-life-charlie @angelicwillows @0puddleofgender0 @fallenh34art @v3r41ynn @froggybich @pank0w @roboticsuccubus83 @littlebear423 @anonymously-ominous @concentratedconcrete

[southasiansource]

AADUJEEVITHAM ആടുജീവിതം THE GOAT LIFE (2024) dir. Blessy Cinematography by Sunil K.S.

While filming abroad, we faced several challenges, but we were well-prepared. It was an amazing experience. We were all determined to do our best, and nobody wanted to compromise on any shot. Blessy sir was incredibly dedicated to the movie. Every frame, lighting, and other factors were planned and executed meticulously. The script demanded a barren and challenging terrain, so we used a colour palette that suited the desert scenes. The idea was to make the viewer feel they needed to escape the treacherous desert like the characters.

— requested by anonymous

[the-travelling-witch]

summary: i'm back on my "'i have more knowledge on x topic than all your advisers together, i just couldn’t progress through the ranks for one reason or another, so you should definitely make me your concubine, so i can gossip about your minister of finance’s stupid proposal while wearing expensive shit and fine dining and then we slowly fall in love' royal au" bs again, so have some rambles because there are a lot of possible constellations here

characters: shouto :: kenma :: inui/koko :: al-haitham/kaveh x gn! reader

general masterlist

𝐒𝐇𝐎𝐔𝐓𝐎

You could practically feel the daggers being glared into your skull. This entire meeting so far, the prince’s closest adviser had narrowed his eyes at you, a gesture which you only returned with a coy smile.

Really, just because it wasn’t common for a royal concubine to attend a meeting concerning safety measures at the upcoming masquerade ball, there was no need for such hostility.

Then again, maybe the adviser was so foul-tempered because of the physical position you found yourself in. But it wasn’t your fault they hadn’t prepared another seat for you or that Shouto was notoriously unbothered with social etiquette. So, if the prince ordered his concubine to sit on his lap instead, who were you to argue?

You doubted he glared at you because he was aware you had been investigating him or that you knew he and his fellow spies were planning an assassination attempt on the royal whose arm was currently lazily curled around your waist.

Surely, “concubine” was not exactly the title you had had in mind when agreeing to work as an intelligence agent on the Todoroki court but considering the former crown prince Touya had basically gone up in smoke after an attempt on his life, placing yourself right next to the prince where an enemy wouldn’t expect might not be a bad idea.

Besides, since you had taken the prince up on his offer, you had been able to enjoy many luxuries you could previously not even dream of. Delicacies practically melted on your tongue, the material of your clothes was of a quality so fine it was like dressing in air and the library held rare books you normally couldn’t get your hands on just like that.

You also had to admit, pretending to be Shouto’s lover wasn’t exactly torture either. Not only was he as handsome as they come but he was also very well-mannered towards you even in private. The clumsy side only few got to see when he let his guard down was also quite adorable.

So, to say you were quite comfortable where you were and had no intention of giving up your spot any time soon was an understatement.

“Your Highness is it really necessary to bring,” the adviser paused momentarily as he gestured at you, “this person to a meeting such as this? How can we be sure they are not working for an opposing kingdom, relaying our security measures to the enemy?”

You caught yourself before a snort escaped you. Seriously, how was nobody onto this guy before you came around?

“I have no doubt about their loyalty to me and the kingdom,” Shouto said, tone even as always, yet his hand around your waist tightened. “Besides, their safety might be compromised just like mine, so this information should be shared with them as well.”

“That’s right,” you goated, a sharp grin on your lips as you reached backwards over your shoulder to run your fingers down Shouto‘s neck as you held eye contact with the adviser. “I’ve shown my devotion to the prince in ways you never could.”

Soon you’d watch the light drain from his eyes as you ended his miserable life but for now you’d find amusement in how they widened in indignation.

𝐊𝐄𝐍𝐌𝐀

“Your Highness! I must ask you to stay in the medic’s quarters!” Said medic was fussing around you as you pulled the outer layer of your clothes back on. “I dressed the wound and used a minor healing spell but you need to rest! A-and your medicine—“

“I can rest in my quarters too,” you sighed, already halfway out of the door. “Someone will come pick up the treatment later.”

The medic was still stammering long after you already set out towards your room, trying not to put too much pressure on your side. You didn’t think it’d be that big of a deal but apparently the monster’s claws that had grazed your skin were laced in some sort of venom, the pain of which left you wheezing when you received another blow to the stomach.

Half stumbling, half falling into your room, you reckoned whatever spell the medic had cast hadn’t done much to rid your body of the poison, especially if you remembered how he had floundered once you first drudged into the infirmary. No wonder you had gone behind your parents’ backs to employ someone who actually understood his craft.

“Whoa what happened to you?” Kenma lifted his head from his magic-driven game board at the sound of the door opening. His sharp amber eyes studied you from head to toe, taking in the ripped clothes and collection of bruises and scratches. “You look like death chewed you up and spit you back out.”

“Thanks,” you retorted just as sarcastically, working to rid yourself of the rest of your armour, wincing when you strained the area around your ribs. “Must be the poison.”

“Poison?” Immediately, Kenma had perked up, already rounding the table, his game forgotten. “What poison? And where? And why didn’t you lead with that?”

Usually, the guy tried to make himself as small as possible, hoping to blend into the background. But whenever you dragged in yet another weird and wonderful ailment from out in the wild, your shy healer found himself in the habit of becoming a little bossy. Other royals might take offence if their concubines used that kind of tone but you had to admit you didn’t really mind.

“Well, it’s not like you gave me much of a chance to explain,” you laughed, pulling your shirt off and letting it pile up with the rest of your things, then wriggled your eyebrows at the blond. “So, where do you want me?”

“You are the worst, even when you’re dying,” Kenma rolled his eyes before a warm hand settled on your bare back and nudged you towards the bed. “For now, just lie down. And tell me exactly what the hell happened to you.”

Without any resistance, you settled down and watched as Kenma got to work. It was fascinating each time, even if you didn’t understand much of it and you were the one having to be treated. Whenever he focused on something, he adopted this no-nonsense expression, lips tightened into a line and eyebrows drawn together. You didn’t even want to start thinking about the way your skin tingled where his fingers touched you, well aware that the reason for it wasn’t the magic Kenma used.

“I told the doc someone would pick up my medicine later,” you spoke up once your healer had finished his work and both of you were just lingering within the same space.

As always when you told Kenma something he didn’t want to hear, he made one of the most expressive faces of disgust a human could muster.

“I’ll make sure to trip on the way,” he shrugged and you were aware he might actually do it too. “I didn’t spend all this time healing you just so that idiot can poison you again with whatever concoction he came up with this time.”

“Just what would I do without you?” Brushing a stray strand of hair out of his eyes, you didn’t miss how Kenma, the guy who used to flinch at people coming near him, leaned slightly into your touch.

𝐈𝐍𝐔𝐈 / 𝐊𝐎𝐊𝐎

The golden light of the sinking sun illuminated the balcony as birds chirped their last songs of the day. In the midst of the flowers blooming across the railing and the castle walls, three people sat around a table filled with fruits, cheese and many other delicious foods, eating and laughing together.

“But to come back to your Minister of Finance’s proposal,” Koko, who seemingly hadn’t taken his eyes off the kingdom’s budget sheet, spoke up. Splitting off a few of the coins from the stack in front of him to visualise the share he was thinking about, he offered his insight. “I think we should use a cut of the newly allocated funds to strengthen the army’s equipment. The knights could do with new armour, especially considering the neighbouring kingdom has been less than friendly lately.”

“What new funds are we talking about?” You inquired, not having been privy to the meeting prior this day. 

“The party we sent out recently was more successful than we expected them to be,” Inui clued you in with a small smile as he studied what Koko proposed.

“Ah, the expedition that was my idea and that I equipped with the right tools. In that case,” you said, a mischievous glint in your eyes, before you made the stack of coins levitate over your outstretched palm, “I think we should use it to build a magic tower. It would help more with defence than equipping the knights, considering what fun things I could do with one.”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Koko scolded, reaching over the table to snatch the coins back. “How should we justify the King’s concubine wishing for a magic tower?”

While you shrugged, Seishu took your hand and answered much gentler than the black haired man. 

“I have to agree with Koko. Not because I doubt you could do a lot of great things with such a tower but because we already had a lot of trouble explaining why the lightning only struck the enemy’s side in the last battle,” he sighed, giving you an understanding look he knew had you giving in already. “The public doesn’t know we have a magic user on our side and word of construction would spread fast. Don’t forget why you went into hiding in the first place.”

“Yeah yeah, I understand, no magic tower. But, how about,” you leant back in your chair, tossing a coin you had hidden up your sleeve before Koko could retrieve it, “one or the other magic tome? Nobody would even notice. Just say it’s for a new necklace or whatever else concubines usually get.”

“Are you suggesting we commit fraud?” Koko levelled his accusatory gaze at you.

“I don’t know, am I?” You innocently asked, batting your eyelashes at him. “It would be for the good of the people, after all.”

“How is you getting a new toy good for the people?”

“I could make the grains grow faster or whatever the people usually pray for,” you shrugged. “I’m at least granting their wishes.”

“I thought you were interested in necromancy recently,” Seishu laughed knowingly. “I’m no expert in the field but how is that helping with making the crops grow?”

“I’m sure a walking dead body or two would scare off the crows,” you said as seriously as you could. “It might also scare off thieves, now that I think about it.”

Koko just looked at you, horrified, while Seishu laughed at your nonchalance. When the former regained his senses, he reprimanded you again. 

“We are not using tax money, so you can experiment with the undead and unleash them on the public!”

“Eh, it was worth a try,” you relented before popping another grape in your mouth.

𝐀𝐋-𝐇𝐀𝐈𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐌 / 𝐊𝐀𝐕𝐄𝐇

You were well aware of the whispers that filled the halls of the castle when you weren’t present. 

Kaveh was probably a more conventional concubine to take, considering his innate kindness and striking beauty. Clearly, when he waltzed into the room beside you, it was like the sun was rising before everyone’s eyes. Yeah, he was probably an expected choice.

Al-Haitham, on the other hand…

It wasn’t exactly his physique which raised people’s questions. Moreso it was his gruff temper and apparent boredom with most topics, burying his nose in a book and brushing people off with less than a single word at times, that made your staff shake their heads at your appointment.

Not that it mattered much what other people thought.

What did matter, however, was that your country’s infrastructure had improved significantly since you made your peculiar choice of companions. After most critical meetings concerning upcoming construction, your subordinates believed your return to your chambers meant you just had to relieve some pent-up stress. Yet, those “steamy” nights were spent hunched over maps and graphs of your nation, pointing out the flaws in your advisers’ proposals and redoing blueprints of planned buildings.

Perhaps nobody else in the castle was aware of it, but Al- Haitham and Kaveh were a genius strategist and brilliant architect respectively, responsible for the projects the public praised you most for. And that had been the nature of your relationship in the beginning. They patched out your advisers’ proposals and you made sure they were compensated accordingly, unconventional as the methods may be.

Though, you supposed, after working together for a while, the titles you had given them may not be so wrong anymore. Long nights spent agonising over the ideal location for a new project had turned into quiet evenings lounging around your quarters, enjoying fine wine and lingering touches. Having the two around had become a great sense of comfort to you and running into them between meetings and stacks of paperworks waiting for you made a spark of fondness flutter in your chest.

However, running into both of them at the same time also meant the unlikely pair were probably bickering. This time, you could actually hear them before you rounded the corner.

“I’m telling you, if we use this type of wood-”

“It would rot under the environmental influences faster than you could complete construction.”

“Why, you…!”

Pinching the bridge of your nose, you exhaled ready to calm down the situation somehow. Then, you came face to face with them and had an entirely new idea on how to mediate. Haitham had his arms crossed as he regarded the blond with an unimpressed expression, the pose accentuating the way his biceps and triceps flexed. With Kaveh turned away from you, you had a clear view of his back, as always exposed by the flowy robes he wore.

Sure, they might not be the most usual concubines you could’ve chosen, but that didn’t matter.

“Strategy meeting in my quarters, now. Royal orders.”

© the-travelling-witch 2024 - do not repost, translate, copy or edit; do not copy into an ai

if you like my content, reblogs, comments and asks are always much appreciated ♡

➺ send in an ask to be added to or removed from my tag list

i think @ryuryuryuyurboat was interested in the idea? have some incoherent rambles then jsjsh

[xmalereader]

Miguel O’Hara x Black Cat! Male Reader || 4 ||

-

|| Masterlist ||

-

Authors note: Hello Everyone! I am back from another vacation…this boy be traveling a lot, but I was able to get part four done of this little mini series! I also want to thank everyone for 7.2k, because holy shit I gained 200 followers in less than a week. I don’t know how that happened but thank you! Also enjoy this new shot!

Summary: Miles and Miguel are a little stuck during a mission and Miles is hesitant to call for back up until a familiar anomaly changes things.

Warnings: No spoilers, fighting, language, parenting skills, hobie is the goat, fluff, black cat anomaly, protective reader and Miguel, some hints of Rio knowing about Miles and Miguel’s identity, short.

Word count: 2.0k

— || Part One || Part Two || Part Three ||

—

“Ah!”

Miles is throw against Miguel who catches him easily as the two tumble to the ground. The teen lying on top of the older Spider as they groan in pain. “How are these guys not giving up?” Miles grumbled out as he slowly gets up with the help of Miguel. The two have taken notice of an unusual Anomaly in the wrong universe. The two expected it to only be one only to encounter four on the other side when entering the universe. Both Miles and Miguel have been at it for hours, growing tired and restless.

“I think we should—“

“No.” Said Miguel, shutting down Miles suggest.

“I just think—“

“No.”

“Do you always say no?”

“No.” The sudden bickering catches the old Spider off guard as Miles grins under his mask, quick to dodge a piece of rumble heading towards them as the teenager swings after the anomaly and lands onto another building. “All I’m saying is that we should bring some back up!” Shouted Miles, grunting as he’s grabbed by the leg and dragged down from where he stood, causing a scream to escape his lips.

The teen comes face to face with Doctor Octavias, someone that he’s very familiar with in his own universe.

“We don’t need it!” Miguel shouts back as he attacks one of the other anaomlies, clearing not listening to Miles who struggled with his own problem as he used his electric static to try and malfunction Doctor Octavias arms. He escapes from his grasp and climbs higher up the building. “Lyla!” He calls out to the artificial intelligence.

“Yes, baby spider?”

Miles groans at the name.

“Can you call for back up, please?” His eyes widen when he’s pinned down a flash of black and white in front of him as a pair of claws dig into his neck and jaw, squinting up in pain as he grunts and makes direct eye contact with a familiar outfit. “Noir?”

The figure leans closer.

“Sorry, hun you must have me confused with someone else.” The voice is feminine as Miles frowns, noticing that the cat holding him down wasn’t Noir. This was someone entirely different but yet, similar to the one he knows. “Didn’t think a kid like you would be a spider—a bit clumsy.” She taunts, holding him down as her claws dig deeper into his neck, causing the teen to wince and glare under his mask.

Miles tried to use his web against the black cat only to have his wrist pinned down, he struggles with moving as she chuckled at him and looks around. “Don’t make this your fight kid, go home before you get yourself hurt.” She warns. Miles huffs out a small laugh as he watched her closely.

Miles can’t help but think about Noir and how every black cat was the same but him and he’s able to tell the difference between her and noir. “Yeah, I don’t think so.” He looks over her shoulder, noticing the familiar portal opening up. “You don’t belong in this world and if I can’t take you back then my dad will.”

The women above him cocks her head with a confused look on her face. Before she can react a flash of black is quick to shove her off Miles, watching as she rolls with a grunt and is quick to stabilize herself. The sound of metal claws against the pavement gets Miles attention, sitting up slowly to see Noir in front of him.

He’s in a crouching position, cat like as he glared under his goggles at the women before him. “Touch my kid again and I won’t hesitate to kill you.” He growls out in warning.

It didn’t take long for the rest of the back up to arrive, both Gwen and Hobie landing next to Miles and helping him up while Noir focused on the black cat in front of him. “Help Mig with the others, this ones mine.” Noir instructs the teens, his eyes not leaving the women before him as she grins at him. “How cute, but I’m not going anywhere.” She states, launching herself at Noir as the two get into a brawl.

Miles steps back and grunts.

“Did he just punch a women?” Gwen asks when she noticed Noir punch the other black cat in the stomach.

“Equal rights, equal fights!” Hobie shouts as he jumps off the building, heading towards one of the anomalies and helping Miguel. As much we he hated it, he knew he had no choice but to help. The three teens worked together on taking down the villains, tying them up and getting rid of their weapons while Miguel worked on the one he was dealing with, using his fangs to inject the poison and numbing them from doing anything else.

“I told you I didn’t need back up.” Miguel grumbled as he drags the anomaly towards the pile of villains as Miles chuckles nervously. “Sure you didn’t, took us a few hours to try and take down one. We needed all the help we could get.” He explains, knowing how much Miguel hated admitting help when it comes towards missions like this. “Doesn’t matter—is it just you three?” He questions.

“Y/n is still dealing with a different version of himself.” Gwen points behind her back towards the roof top of one of the buildings as the four of them turned to watch the fight, noticing how Noir and Black cats movements are nearly in sync. “Five bucks that he takes her down in a minute.” Said Hobie, getting the other teens intrigued by the bet. “Bet ten that he takes her down, now!” Miles points at the scene before them as Noir grows angry, changing his way of fighting and using an old trick of his that Miguel taught him a long time ago.

“Stay down, for once!” Noir growls through gritted teeth as he gets her tied up with his grappling hook, keeping her claws far away from the wire and using the extra wire to tie her wrists together, finally getting her pinned.

Miguel hums, shrugging his shoulder. “I taught him that.” He mumbled as he swings towards the building, landing next to Noir and giving his husband a glance. “You know, I didn’t think you’d be able to take your own self down.”

“For the record, that is not me and second I learned a thing or two differently than everyone else.” Noir shot back as he leans against Miguels shoulder, feeling himself grow tired from the constant fighting while wincing in pain. Turns out that he got a few pretty good cuts from the anomaly. “We should have that checked out.” Said Miguel as his fingers touch the small wounds which only caused Noir to smile. “Nah, I’m okay I’ve been through worse.” He bends down to pick up the anomaly and carry them with towards the rest of the others as Miguel opens a portal back to base.

“Still, at least have it checked for me.” Miguel takes his own anomaly and drags them inside the portal while the others do the same. Y/n sighs softly and rolls his eyes when hearing how worried his husband is for him and knows that he shouldn’t argue with him. “Fine, I will get it checked out.” He walks through the portal that takes them back to base.

Getting assistance from the other spiders and taking the anomalies back to their own universe where they belonged while Y/n walks alongside Miguel and Miles. Y/n had noticed Miles limping with each step he took, causing him to raise a brow. “Hey.” His voice gets Miles’ attention and turns to face the older man who gently gripped his chin. “You alright? You’re limping—she didn’t hurt you did she?” Y/n’s voice suddenly growing protective as he glares, but Miles is quick to shake his head. “No, no, don’t worry this wasn’t her doing. I was dealing with one of the other anomalies and they pulled me by the leg, I should be fine soon.”

Miles give his leg a small shake and continued to walk alongside Y/n with a content smile on his face after he removes his mask when entering base. “Good, because I can’t have your mother hunting me down if she finds out what happened.” Miles groans, forgetting about his mother.

It’s been three months since Miles’ mother found out about Miles and Miguel being Spider-Man, catching the two in the act. Miles couldn’t forget the amount of laughing that Y/n did when he was told about the accident. Miles was panicking and Miguel was not happy with his husbands reaction with all of this. I took some time for Miles’ mother to grow adjusted with the idea of her son being the cities hero. She had actually threatened Miguel to keep a close eye on Miles whenever they are out on missions.

Technically, Miles is suppose to be under Miguels watch. But, he wasn’t doing a very good job at it.

“Just tell your mom that you pulled a muscle.” Y/n shrugs his shoulders when entering Miguels lab. “She’s a nurse, she will notice how I really got it.” Miles shakes his head already knowing how clever his mother was. His mother, Rio, knew about his identity along with Miguels, but she still had no idea that Miles’ mentor was the cities greatest thief. The same thief that his dad spent days trying to capture not knowing that so called thief was the same man who was invited to his families dinners.

“If Rio finds out about you, she will not be too happy to know that her son hangs around a thief.” Miguels words catch the cats attention as he gasps dramatically, placing a hand over his heart. “You wound me.” Y/n gives off a small show of being dramatic only to laugh in the end. “She can be upset about me being a thief, but she will for sure kill us back when she finds out that you married a thief and knew about it the whole time.”

Miguel froze, knowing damn well that Y/n was right.

“Then we are a very small, but dysfunctional family.” Miguel mutters out as he focused on his work, making sure that everything was left as a report regarding the anomalies and who was involved in the fight. It was very rare for Miguel to accept his feelings about having a family again, after losing his daughter and gaining another kid from Y/n was still something new to him. He’s slowly getting used to Miles and the teen was still adjusting to Miguel too.

They had their moments together and the rare times that Miguel grew protective over Miles. Y/n remembers the first time he witnessed such actions, noticing Miguels body language change. It happened when one of the spiders had the audacity to pick on Miles for being an anomaly, blaming him for the doom of universe 42 since they didn’t have a spider to protect their world. Miguel usually showed no signs of the matter of caring, doing his own job, but when the spider took things too far. Miguel stepped in and he was not happy.

Y/n still remembers the fear that he struck on the spider, telling them to focus on their job on protecting their own world and minding their own business and threatening to send them back to where they came from and cutting off access to allowing them back on base for picking on his kid.

His kid.

Even though Miles wasn’t theirs by blood, their time together made them feel like a family.

Y/n sighs softly, snapping back to reality as he approached Miles. “Alright, go on. Mama bird is waiting for you. I’d suggest heading back home before she gets worries and starts calling Miguel about your late return back home.” He gives the teen a nudge on the shoulder and tussling his hair on the way over to Miguel.

Miles chuckles. “Alright, I’m going. I’ll see you both tonight!” The teen gives them a small wave before opening a portal back to his universe and heading back home for the day, leaving both Miguel and Y/n on there own.

Y/n walks over to Miguel, standing next to his side and leaning his head against his shoulder. “I think we make great parents.”

“I don’t think sending a kid to fight off four villains is considered good parenting.”

Y/n laughs. “You were there weren’t you? That means that you were keeping an eye on him and making sure that nothing happens to him.” He points out, chin on Miguels shoulder as he watched his husband closely who rolls his eyes at him. Not saying anything and taking his silence as a small victory.

“See, we make great parents!” Y/n says with a huge smile.

Miguel can only sign deeply. “Rio is going to kill us.”

[sodaskateboard]

Ganyu NSFW Headcanons

AN: Sigh, thinking about my goat wife,, my precious princess, Gender Neutral Reader/ No Autonomy Given for Reader

Cannot dom to save her life

She will cry if you ask her to because she doesn't want to upset you but still just,, can't do it. Poor girl

Sex is very intimate and private for her, so she can't do hook ups or be with someone she doesn't love

She's also had very few, if any, sexual partners and wasn't very interested in sex before you so she's pretty inexperienced

You get to teach her the joy of "stress relief"

She needs it now regularly or else the stress just builds up again. Please. She physically needs it. Please, please, please

She needs constant reassurance and praise

It has to be romantic and sweet and soft

That said, you can tease her a little, but it has to be nice. Don't insult her even as a joke

"Is my sweet girl needy?" you ask her, already knowing the answer from how she sinks her body into your lap, trying to grind on you, without making it obvious. And maybe it wouldn't be if her breath wasn't so uneven, peaking around her small moans that she couldn't stop from escaping. She lets out a louder moan in response and leans back into your chest. It's clear what she wants, but she's too cute to pass up on. "Sorry sweetheart, you're gonna have to use your words." She whines loudly in protest and hides her red face in your neck, too embarrassed to say anything, only getting out her moan and pants and bucking into your hand.

Gets overstimulated easily

Loves having when you play with her tits. Massage them, kiss them, pinch her nipples, and suck on them

She's cummed just from having them sucked on while riding your thigh

Finds it embarrassing to finish and it takes a lot of energy from her

So it's even more overwhelming

Loves holding your hand while she finishes

She can't cum unless she feels safe

So hold her, pet her hair, whisper to her that's she's the most beautiful creature to ever exist, that you love with your whole soul, that you're going to make her your wife one day, how happy seeing her makes you

Her favourite dirty talk is the kind that if you just read it with no context, it could sound like wedding vows

Once you read her a love poem while fingering her in your lap and now she can't hear the poet's name without being mortified,, and a little excited

Her favourite place is in your or hers teapot. That way she knows no one can see you two

Imagine her surprise when you recreated her office in it. And several streets from Liyue outside,,,

She feels so dirty for imagining getting fucked somewhere like her work place or public, but she likes it so much

The first time you had sex outside in the teapot, she learned she was so sensitive even the wind's gentlest blow on her bare skin made her hot

She tastes very close to water, maybe with a bit of a herbal taste since she eats and drinks very healthy

She needs post sex cuddles more than she needs air. She needs a lot of emotional support during and after, so she knows you still like her after and are staying with her

"You work so hard Ganyu, I think you need at least one more. Just to be sure we got all the stress out of you." The half adeptus has her legs over your shoulder, the waves of her last orgasm still rippling through her body, making her head go back and her hips buck into nothing while her back tenses and all of her shakes. You place a hand her outer hip, gently patting her up and down until she can answer. You hum and watch her writhe.

She may be the divine being, knowing the Archon and adepti of Liyue for centuries and being raised them, but with the sight of her, you know you're the one truly blessed. To have Ganyu in your arms, to love and be her lover, there is not a mortal or immortal luckier than you. With her, you would stand in front of not only the adepti, or all of the Liyue, but all of Teyvat and its' archons and beyond. Even among Celestia, there is none more blessed than you, you're sure of it.

Your lovely girlfriend whines and squirms still. Maybe it was a little mean to make her finish four times. Or maybe what made it mean was that you planned to go for five tonight without telling her your goal. "You ready to go again pretty girl?" She whines loudly, either in protest or agreement. You softly giggle, "what does that mean?". She looks away from you, grabbing a pillow and putting it over her face. Then she starts to hump the air, wanting you to take care of her again. You were sure from the cry she let out when you began licking her heat again that making her cum five times was the meanest thing. Only maybe your cute little workaholic needed someone to be mean to her to get her to relax.

[gumsnail682]

Ugh I haven't had alot of motivation recently but this idea came to me when I was supposed to be doing school work and I finally wrote it! Enjoy.

~~~

MC: Hey Karasu call 'Dad'

Karasu: Calling 'Daddy'

MC: NO NO NO!

Diavolo-

Just laughs, he finds the situation very amusing. "You all look so shocked!" The shock on everyone's face only made it more hilarious to him.

Barbatos-

He'd chuckle before answering the call while looking you dead in the eyes. "Yes?" He wouldn't tease you too much but it would definitely come up again later.

Simeon-

He's just as mortified as you are in that moment. He sits there completely frozen, doing his best to keep smiling and acting as if nothing was happening. He wouldn't even look down at his phone, he'd just let it ring. "Simeon why dose MC have your contact name as Daddy?" You both wanted to die right there and then when Luke asked that.

Solomon-

"MC you know I'm right here, no need to call me." He'd pick up his phone before declining the call. He would tease you relentlessly and there's nothing you can do to stop him.

Lucifer-

He'd take this opportunity to show everyone that you're his. "Yes MC?" He loved watching you squirm uncomfortably, if you were close enough he'd pull you closer to his side.

Mammon-

He would throw his phone into the other room then drag you away before anyone could say anything. "Here's an idea MC, we move away."

Leviathan-

Dead. Passed out as soon as he felt his phone vibrate. like a scared goat, just freezes up and falls. 

Satan-

He will BRAG about this for the rest of your life. Especially to Lucifer "If you don't recall MC has me in their phone as-" 

Asmodeus- 

He would let it ring till it went to voicemail then, "Karasu call [dirty name]" and all eyes shift back over to you as your phone rings. 

Beelzebub-

It doesn't quite click until after he answers the call. "Hu?.. Oh!" You both just stare at each other for a few seconds before Beel takes you back to his room to escape the stares of everyone else.

Belphegor-

His phone is always on silent but the smirk on his face says it all. Even though no one could hear the phone ring he'd pick it up while staring at you. "Yes MC? Did you need Daddys help?" He would not be sorry in the slightest.

[lulublack90]

Prompt 14 - Climb

@jegulus-microfic August 14, Word count 810

Previous part First Wolfstar part

Regulus was hot, over hot, nearly sweating. The cause of the climb in his temperature was currently curled around him, locking him into his body so he couldn’t escape. He was in James’s bed with James. His heart did an odd little flutter at the idea. Teenage Regulus would be having a stroke if he knew this was in his future. 

He kept as still as possible. Cataloguing the way it felt to be touching James, the way his skin was smooth on his chest but scratching with unshaved bristles on his chin and neck, the steady thump of his heartbeat and his slow, even sleep-filled breaths. James stirred, he wrapped his arms tighter around Regulus, nuzzling his hair. 

“Mmm, lavender,” He sighed as he slowly woke up. 

“Sorry did I wake you?” Regulus’s voice was slightly muffled against James’s chest. 

“No, you’re alright. Did you sleep?” James asked, yawning and rolling his shoulders. 

“Yes, thank you,” Regulus whispered. He didn’t want this moment to end. 

James shuffled him but only so he could roll onto his back and drag Regulus back under his arm. Regulus almost purred when James’s hand stroked up his arm and into his curls. He carded his fingers through Regulus’s hair and gently scratched at his scalp. He’d never had anybody touch him like that. Not that he hadn’t fantasised about it. It was peaceful. He sighed contentedly and allowed himself the luxury of stretching his arm out across James’s chest and leaving it there. 

He wasn’t sure how long they stayed there, but their little bubble was abruptly broken by a loud pop and the arrival of Flitsy. 

“Breakfast,” She barked at them before popping back out of the room again. 

“She’s unnerving,” Regulus shuddered. He didn’t think he’d ever get used to the odd little elf. James chuckled and pushed the hair off Regulus’s face so he could press a kiss on his forehead. It had been so natural, like he’d done it a thousand times before. Regulus had no idea where they stood now after he’d thrown himself at James yesterday in the library, but James seemed more than happy to continue whatever it was.

“Come on, love, or she’ll come back, and she won’t be as nice.” Regulus jumped out of James’s bed and went in search of his clothes. They were clean and mended on his bed, ready for him to put on. 

He met James on the landing, and they went down to breakfast together, James taking his hand in his again as he led him back to the dining room. 

Huge bowls of steaming porridge waited for them. Regulus wolfed his down, feeling warm and full afterwards. They thanked Flitsy for the meal and wandered to the library to look up parselmouths. 

The search wasn’t nearly as fruitful as yesterday had been. It turned out that at some point a few Potters had the ability to speak the snake language, but it hadn’t been seen for five generations. 

“Gah, this is useless!” Regulus whined as he threw James’s great great great great uncle’s diary, telling the story about how he’d charmed a snake to curl up on his head like a circlet crown and that Morag Potter had called him a daft old goat. Apparently, he’d asked that same snake to sleep on Morag’s pillow and been severely punished by his mother for it, across the desk. 

“Well, then we need to think of a different solution.” James said, closing his own book, ‘Know your Serpents’. "What other parselmouths do we know of apart from Voldemort?” Regulus shoved his hands into his hair and tugged hard. 

“No one. The only ones I’ve ever heard of are Voldemort himself, Salazar Slytherin and now your four times great uncle Malcolm! It’s useless!” He let his head drop onto the desk, trying to get his brain to think of anything that could help. 

“Regulus?” James asked thoughtfully. 

“I know, I know, it’s never hopeless, blah, blah, blah, good always wins, blah, blah, blah, we can do it,” He said defeatedly, raising his fist in mock cheer.

“Well, yes, but that’s not what I was going to say,” James was grinning. Regulus could hear it in his voice.

“Go on then, what were you going to say?” Regulus said into the table. 

“Is it true there’s a portrait of Salazar Slytherin in the Slytherin Common room?”

“Yes, he’s above the fireplace. He’s a bit of a pain really always talking to the snake they painted him with. Sometimes the hissing gave me headaches—Oh Merlin’s beard!!!” His head snapped up. “There’s a portrait of Salazar in the Slytherin Common room!” He gawped at James, mouth wide open in an O. 

“There’s a portrait of Salazar in the Slytherin Common room,” James repeated, grinning from ear to ear. Finally, they were getting somewhere.

Next part