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#which i suppose is a comfort to know. a little odd maybe but definitely better than the alternative
supercantaloupe · 9 months
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i think probably the funniest thing that my dad said to me today was when he was remarking how different me and my sister are and he was like. she prefers being in out in the wilderness, you're happy in the middle of the city; she's training to fight wildfires and you're this crazy skilled musician; she would jump out of a plane and you like to work in the library; she's even gay
and i was like. Well,
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tranquilpetrichor · 2 years
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perfectly imperfect
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synopsis: in which yunho helps you let go of your fears, one 8-count at a time.
cast: dancer!yunho (ateez) x dancer!reader, mentions of other ateez members.
genre: comfort, some fluff, friendship with implication of a mutual crush
wc: 1.7k
warnings: some negative self-talk, descriptions of physical exhaustion, cursing, some parts not proofread
a/n: sometimes we do indeed get lost in our own heads. there's so much to think about when you dance for a class/career lol but honestly at its purest form (for me) dance should make you feel good. also. there's such a fun feeling fooling around with people after dance practice. anyways enough from me! this one is a little rough, sorry y'all. school is annoying.
taglist: @restlessmaknae
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remember what yunho told you. try not to rely on the mirror.
your arm glided above your head, creating an invisible semi-circle as you went through a choreography your friend, yunho had taught you. after finishing the routine, you collapsed on the floor near your phone, and with a bit of effort, stopped the video that was recording.
time to review the footage. having exerted yourself to your last breath, you were more than happy to have a reason to sit down.
"oh? what the hell," you frowned at your screen and made a disgusted face—anyone looking at you probably would have thought you ate something rotten. you might as well have.
your angles weren't clean enough. that part should have been smoother. right arm, not left! yeah, you spent a good few minutes rewinding that damn video. just to make sure you weren’t missing anything, you watched it again while you were rolling out the arches of your feet with a tennis ball.
you hoped that you'd execute yunho's choreography well enough to use for an audition, but right now things weren't looking great.
the door opened, and yunho walked in, noticing how tired you were. he still appeared upbeat, even though you knew he was probably exhausted too. "y/n! thought we were, uh, taking a break."
a sigh escaped your lips. "well, i was. but after you left, i just wanted to run the dance one more time. for myself."
he began to stretch some more, and you couldn't help but always be quietly amazed by how graceful he was. "i expected that," he said with a shrug. "you've always been a perfectionist. one more minute to rest, and then we'll run the choreography again."
you went over it in your head, methodically addressing your mistakes and praying there would be no stupid gaps in your memory when it was actually time to dance.
yunho walked over to the laptop and pressed play, with "hymn for the weekend" by coldplay blasting out the speakers, and then he went to go sit in the corner.
okay, what do i have to remember?
for one, the dance started on an odd count—leave it to yunho to make things unpredictable for you. and he choreographed it mostly to beats in the instrumental, so that's what you were going to focus on this time.
"1, 2, and 3!"
flick, flick, 6 and 7, 8. through, down, 3, 4. fuck, is this even supposed to be the hand detail? whatever.
and before you knew it, you were finished. everything felt practiced, and you thought the dance went slightly better than last time.
perhaps you could chalk it up to muscle memory—thank god that existed! still, there was always something you could fix, but for the moment, you took a sip of water from your bottle, grateful for its cool temperature.
yunho went over to stop the music. "alright, so that was better. definitely! maybe a few details that still need a bit of work, but you definitely know the dance. the major comment i have is relax, y/n. please. i can see you’re not dancing in the moment.”
that was still one of your major flaws—that your brain refused to be at peace. your thoughts felt like a constant whir, hyper-focused on the nitty-gritty of whatever you were doing. that was nice and all when you were reviewing someone else’s dancing, but it seemed to hinder your own.
“i guess habits really are hard to break,” you said, laying on the floor with a groan.
he sat beside you, and you instinctively steadied yourself using his shoulder, almost all of your adrenaline gone. you began to think of all the things you forgot to do during the dance, and remembered yunho's comment about not dancing in the moment.
what am i, a deer lost in headlights?
your thoughts were interrupted by him, probably for the better. “don’t beat yourself up about it. i know you, and you’re trying. you wouldn’t be here if you weren’t. and you’re improving—anyone with eyes can see it.”
instinctively, you looked away from him, down at some speck of dust on the floor. “maybe? i think? i’m not as good as you though, great yunho-ssaem."
humor always diffuses a situation, right?
yunho gently turned you to face him and laughed, but it wasn't out of malice. “don't discredit yourself like that! none of us are perfect—i’m still learning, myself.”
for his youthful energy, he was actually quite wise in his mindset, which is why you trusted him a lot, along with the fact that him being almost a year older wasn't so significant for you.
“i mean, i know you’re right, but clearly i still can't fix my problem.”
he gave a mock gasp. “but of course, i’m right, y/n. no, but seriously. knowing you have a problem is half the battle. some of us never get to that. give yourself time to grow."
you gave yunho a fist bump, and a quick hug. "god, you're the best. what the hell would i do without you?"
it was his turn to look slightly embarrassed, cheeks slightly flushed from the compliment.
"haha, thanks y/n, i try my best. anyways, forget that shit about me being perfect. did i ever tell you about the time i did a duet with mingi but started my section a few counts too early?”
you shuddered and gave him a sympathetic look. "i would rather start late than early, honestly. everyone can see an early start.”
“hey, i did just fine after! and at least it was just a practice. mingi sent the video to me. i'll show you," he said, taking out his phone.
you never missed a chance to learn from other people’s work when it came to dance, and watching videos was a great way to learn.
he stood up and lifted his hand way above your head with a teasing grin. screw tall people.
you jumped, but it didn't get you that far off of the ground. “yun-hoe! oh my god, stop being tall.”
“you’re not even that short,” he said, laughing at you. “but i’ll still always be taller than you.”
“i hate you."
after you gave one more playful attempt to swipe the phone, he finally sat down, scrolling through his camera roll. “look, now you can see how unorganized and chaotic everything is. there's wooyoung twerking, you and san trying to flip—ah, found it."
"haha, you can send me that video of wooyoung later."
yunho laughed. "maybe."
he clicked the duet and the video began to play, starting off with shakiness as a pair of hands attempted to adjust the camera’s position.
you could hear yunho’s laugh. “mingi, stop touching it. i think it’s good now. let’s go!”
“i guess you're right, fighting!”
the two stood side by side, with shared smiles. you knew that feeling well. dance friends were the best.
and then there was the part yunho had mentioned: his early start. it was sorta cute, as he realized he was off the counts and jumped back to his starting position. it would easily be embarrassing for you, but he laughed it off easily.
mingi slapped him on the back in the video. “damn, dude. you got on my ass for missing the timing and here you are.”
after, yunho went to restart the music, grinning. "just remember that i’m older than you, mingi. shut it!”
“it's only by a couple of months!”
the two returned to dancing, this time, starting perfectly in sync. you could feel joy radiating off of the two, and it was clear they loved every second of what they did. you clapped eagerly for them, amazed by how in command of themselves they were.
yunho turned to you after the video ended.
"look, that was only the tip of the iceberg of my embarrassing mistakes. and that wasn't even that bad so far." he laughed sheepishly before continuing.
"but at least, there isn't a person in the world who's perfect. why worry so much about that when you could enjoy yourself? it naturally makes your dancing that much better, too."
he went to grab his laptop, typed some stuff in and handed it to you. "remember our playlist? let's shuffle it and have a freestyle battle! and we could get bbq after. my treat.."
you perked up, especially at the thought of food. he was definitely trying to distract you from your endless thoughts, but you didn't mind, not today.
"you're on. rock-paper-scissors, loser goes first!"
"one, two, three, shoot!" you both yelled, and you shrugged, as you'd lost to him.
"see, rock always wins! do your worst," yunho said.
“i will.”
to your delight, the first song that came on shuffle was a childhood favorite of yours—umbrella by rihanna. it had gone on your shared playlist as soon as you rediscovered the catchy tune.
you started to dance, and although your moves were somewhat slow, they still had a fervent energy to them. everything moved of its own accord. really; the only way to describe it was that there was an amazing sensation you felt every once in a while, when the music could guide you to become a different person entirely.
that was stupidly cheesy, you knew. but it was good to feel so free. it was possible for you.
"okay, then!" yunho yelled after your two 8-counts were over, hyping you up. "that's what i'm talking about! but i'll still kick your ass."
you laughed, glad that you could tease someone, but all in good fun. "we'll see about that."
it was his turn to show off, and he didn't even need to do anything fancy. whether the audience was ten, a hundred, or there wasn't one at all, he performed. the energy he had electrified the room, every kick and flick of the hand holding meaning.
no one's perfect. give it time. you'll get there, you reminded yourself. normally, you'd try to compare yourself to dancers like yunho, the ones who seemed like they had it all. their skills wouldn't stop you from becoming the best dancer you could be, enjoying yourself along the way. there were always going to be things you wished were better, but worrying ate away at your mental health.
in the background, the music continued, its beat making you sway with ease, and suddenly, all that mattered was this moment of two imperfect dancers sharing their craft.
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jaidasstuff · 1 year
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“Best Friends” - Chris Motionless
Summary: confessing his feelings for his best friend
It was a Friday evening, Chris and I met had up at 6 pm, like every week. You could say that it was a kind of tradition between us and usually we did it every week, except for when Chris was on tour with his band. his band is called motionless in white and to be honest i’m quite a big fan girl. Him and I have been friends for basically a decade now and we both consider us best friends, at least i think we do. Lately he's been acting strange around me but I guess it's just some odd phase going on. don’t get me wrong we’re both acting strange sometimes but this time it’s something else, i can tell. I know he's a pretty busy person since he's famous and all, but I really miss the old Chris, it's a bit selfish i know that but I wish he would've never gotten this excessively famous. Things changed between the two of us these past weeks and I hate that. I'm a person that always despised change, because of my social anxiety. although it’s not just that, if I'm being honest I fell for him a while ago but never told him anyway. I won't consider it now, since there's a lot he could lose from being in a relationship at this point. chris loves his fans and they would be furious if they knew, or at least i’m fearing they will. "Y/N!" He loudly said, confused as to why i was zoning out, it got me back to reality real quick. "Oh gosh sorry, I was just lost in my own thoughts" I apologized, feeling guilty that I didn't listen to what he was actually saying. i didn’t even know what topic he was speaking about.. Gosh I must've been out of it for quite some time. "I guessed that already, Y/N" he replied smirking at me which made me roll my eyes, that little fucker always being sarcastic, which only made him even more attractive to me "but seriously we need to talk now" he said and sat up since we were both laying on his black king sized bed. "Sure what's wrong?" I asked nervously since I didn't really know what this actually was about. To be honest I was scared that he'd say something along the lines ‘i noticed your little crush on me, can’t have that so i’ll be going now’ but you never know until you do talk about it and maybe it’s just my anxiety speaking up."So I've been meaning to talk to you about something or well uh rather tell you about something" he stuttered, not looking at me but the movie that was muted and still on. "What's this about Chris? You know you can always talk to me if something is wrong or you need someone, we're best friends" I reassured him, giving him a sweet comforting smile. At least I tried to hide my nervousness which seemed to work at least a bit. Wow am i good at hiding stuff?! "I know Y/N but that's exactly what i'm talking about it.. that's the actual problem!" Chris sighed and i was confused as hell. What was the fucking problem? Us being best friends? I really couldn't think about any reason why he'd say something like that as a reply to what i just said. "Huh? I don't quite understand what the problem or well our problem is. Aren't we fine? Are you mad at me? Did I do something wrong? at least tell me what i did before you stop being friends with me?" I asked him shaking my head, i’m getting even more nervous now. "No that's not what I meant at all!" He sighed and i knew he was getting frustrated by now "then tell me!" I replied, now looking at my best friend. I really felt bad seeing him like this but what was I supposed to do when I literally don't know what's going on.
"I fell for you, Y/N that's our problem!" He yelled and got up, trying to walk away from the situation. No that's definitely not gonna happen, he better not try to really walk away now! now I got up as fast as possible and got in front of him. Chris was very tall compared to me, it's one of my favorite things about this man. his height is something I've always loved. There are too many things i like about my best friend, it's ridiculous by now. if someone asked me to name one thing about him, i wouldn't be able to stop myself from listing everything, not just one thing. "Please don't walk away now! You know we have a rule about this" i told him as calm as i could, looking at his troubled face. Chris and me only have one fucking rule in our friendship, but it's the most important rule for me, he agreed to it because he knows why it's so important. We would never leave while fighting, it basically means we don't go to sleep while still mad at each other or walk away, anything like that practically. I'm so thankful that this promise was always kept and he never left me, so him trying to means it's troubling him a lot more than i thought. "I know, I'm sorry angel. i really didn't mean to do that, right now it’s just stressing me out so much" he softly whispered and looked down at me, he earned a small nod to reassure him that i'm not actually mad at him. "Also I do love you too you know that, right?" I admitted shyly trying to avoid looking at the man that i dearly loved. "What?" He asked, in disbelief, so I'm gonna prove it to him. I got on my tip toes and kissed him genuinely, at first he tensed up a bit since he usually doesn’t like sudden skin ship but he ended up kissing me back. that’s a good sign! It felt like fireworks exploding in my whole fucking body, i loved this already. "so what does that make us now?" i asked chris after a while of us kissing each other. "that means you, Y/N, are my girlfriend now" he replied cockily while pulling me down onto his bed "wanna watch another movie? that one was actually boring, wouldn't you agree?" he said making me laugh at his silly behavior "yes let’s watch another one! which one do you want to watch?" i asked him looking at my boyfriend. chris smiled sweetly at me while putting on some movie before replying "let's watch your favorite movie the emperor's new groove". gosh i really loved this guy!
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yoooespinosa · 3 years
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could you please write a draco x reader fic, where the reader is hopelessly in love with draco, and she's not afraid to show it. but draco doesn't feel the same. and draco being draco, he rejects the reader with no remorse. then when the reader finally comes to the realization that she deserves better, she started seeing new people (not necessarily dating, but more like talking), then that's when draco feels a bit jealous now that the reader isn't all over him anymore. the rest is up to you, love! just something really angsty, you could end it in any way you'd like.
also, sidenote. you're an amazing writer and i love you!!
a/n: Thank you for your request! ily <3
To say you had a crush on Draco Malfoy, was an understatement.
You couldn't help it, you couldn't just stop the feelings you developed every time he came around.
When he walked into the room it was butterflies breaking out of their cage, palms growing sweaty and your heart racing so fast you were scared you'd be able to see its indentions.
It was scary at first, to have such feelings at only thirteen years old. So you did your best to ignore them. You did your best to stay out of his way.
That only worked for so long.
When you are friends with Draco and the people that surround him, it becomes very hard to stay out of his path.
So it was only inevitable that your crush on him would become so much more. Especially as the years went on.
He hadn't made it much easier. Sometimes you felt as if, maybe, he returned your feelings. How could you think otherwise? With the way he walked with you to class, carried your books at times and spent time with you. Just you. Alone.
How could you not fall in love with him.
With all that simmering in you, you finally let it out. You made your affections obvious, not afraid to show Draco how you felt for him. You had thought it was welcomed. You thought that the feelings would be returned.
It seemed as though he could only tolerate you for so long. Yes, that was the right word for it, the only thing he had for you was toleration.
Your shoes sounded on the stone under you, on your way to the Slytherin common room. You had just got out of detention with professor Snape. You suppose it was well deserved, you had seen Draco almost put the wrong ingredient in his potion, so you being you had wandered to his table and helped him, much to Snapes dismay.
Whispering the password, you made your way through the dim passage. Chattering of people from all years and faint laughter was heard all around.
You spotted your friends right away, seated by the green flamed fireplace, as usual.
"She just can't take a hint." You heard Draco grumble, you paused your steps, you didn't mean to eavesdrop but it seemed as if your feet had a mind of its own.
"Wait," Blaise closes the book he had in his hold. "who are we talking about again?"
Pansy sighs, seeming they had been on the topic for some time. "We're talking about y/n."
Your brows furrow. Going back to the first thing you heard Draco say, she just can't take a hint, what was that supposed to mean. What hint?
"Why can't you just tell her how you feel?" Theo adds, his voice is laced with annoyance, maybe this isn't the first time they've talked about this.
"I thought how I felt would be obvious enough, without having to say anything." He huffs.
"Well," Theo sighs. "apparently not."
You were becoming anxious. What were they talking about and what exactly was Draco feeling? There was streak of hope in you, maybe he'd confess right here that he felt the same.
"What do you suggest I say then, oh-wise-one?" Draco asks teasingly.
"Easy, just say exactly what you tell us." He clears his throat dramatically, adopting a mock version of his voice, "Y/n, you have to be one of the most annoying girls, I have ever had the dissatisfaction of meeting. Please, oh please take the hint and leave me alone because these attempts at getting at me are getting more pathetic each time." He finishes with a clumsy curtsy.
The other Slytherins try to stifle their laughs.
You hadn't even noticed the gasp that escaped your throat until four heads turned to your direction.
"Y/n, I didn't kn-" You cut of Theo's words and apologetic stare.
"Is that true?" You ask Draco, your voice low, laced with hurt. Your nose was stinging and your bottom lip hung heavy, but you refused to cry in front of them. You wouldn't give them another weakness to laugh about.
Draco managed to keep his face blank, no emotions shining through. He shrugged, "Pretty much summed it up."
You almost flinched. He didn't even care about the hurt those words brought you.
You left without a look back. Leaving behind your friends call of your name. They weren't the ones you wanted an apology from. They had known how much you felt for him and didn't even bother telling you that it was definitely not mutual. They even laughed, like it was a joke, like your heart was a comedic topic.
The cold air hit your face, freezing against the tear stain tracks. You sat on a lone stone bench in the court yard, letting those tears make a home on your cheeks.
It wasn't obvious--his dislike to you. If it was, you would have gave up long ago. But a part of you felt that there was hope and you had chased after that.
Why couldn't he have just told you when you first let your affections known, it seemed that he had encouraged it back then, with lingering touches and soft smiles.
Looking back now, you notice that those advantages had slowly disappeared. You had been too caught up in his silky hair, those gray eyes filled with mirth and mischief, his angular face with high bones that no one could compare to, that you hadn't notice everything was unrequited.
A sick part of you even felt honored to have your heart broken in the hold of his beautiful hands, the part that saw him do no wrong.
Maybe that was the first problem, you put him on a pedestal, so high up you weren't able to see anything negative of him. You weren't able to see his cruel reality of his feelings towards you.
And he didn't even seem sorry. He didn't even look bothered by the damage of his words.
You were so nice and considerate to him. You would support him at every quidditch game, cheer the loudest even when he lost. You bought him presents for every one of his birthdays and even Christmas, each one sentimental and thoughtful. You had comforted him when he got those letters, that he despised, from his father. You had voiced encouragements when he showed a little tell sign of his insecurities. You had been there for him.
And he treats you like this, like you can be so easily dismissed. You didn't deserve that, you didn't deserve to be called pathetic for having normal feelings and then being laughed at for it.
The longer you sat on that cold bench, the angrier you got. A bitter feeling growing in your stomach, melting away those knots.
You wasted all this time and effort on some guy who didn't even deserve it, some guy who didn't appreciate you. It wasn't fair.
"Hey, you okay?" A familiar voice sounded through your revelations.
You looked up and met green eyes framed with circular glasses.
"Yeah. I was just thinking." You mumbled, the bitter taste was stuck on your tongue, you wanted rid of it.
"Mind if I sit and think with you?" Harry asked, he was nervously scratching the back of his neck, smiling warmly at you.
You offered him a smile, welcoming his genuineness. "Go ahead."
He sat there with you for hours. Surrounded by the sound of wind. It was nice and comfortable. The bitter feeling leaving you completely. You were content now, even if you could still feel the ache in your arms from holding onto Draco for so long.
Weeks had passed. Weeks of no signs of you. The first week Draco hadn't been worried, a little curious, but that was all. The longer it went on though, he became a little more than curious. Not because he cared, cause he didn't, just that if something happened to you, it would be his fault. His rejection was the reason you ran off like a fool to who knows where.
Which is the only reason he went looking for you. He already got a lot of shit from the others, he didn't need more problems stacking up.
He checked all of your favorite places. Starting with that tree down by the black lake that you enjoyed to lean on and watch the sun go down, the sunset wasn't near so he should've known you would not have been there.
He then went to the gardens, there was a bench there that was next to a small pond. It was filled with odd creatures and was home to your favorite flowers, lotus's. You weren't there either.
Lastly, he went to a certain abandoned hall. You had to be there. You went there to be alone with your thoughts, you had taken him with you there a few times. There was a big window there with a thick ledge, streams of sunlight beamed through and tiny rainbows would reflect on the opposite wall due to the cracks on said window.
He heard you before he saw you. A soft laugh reverberating through the empty hall, a laugh he had always found annoying. Hearing it now though, just made him want to get closer to you.
So he did, walking with light footsteps. He froze, you were not alone. Sitting there in the space he once accompanied, was Harry fucking Potter. What kind of sick joke was this?
Why were you sitting with him? And does that mean you just laughed at something he said?
Your laugh sounded through again, once piercing now melodic. It was a bitter feeling, Potter shouldn't have the honor of dragging that sound out of you, he shouldn't even witness it.
Draco left the hall before either of you saw him, he needed to get himself in check.
More weeks passed. Weeks of you hanging out with Potter. You were doing things with him that you had done with Draco.
It was on purpose, you had to be doing it on purpose. You were simply trying to make him jealous and it was annoyingly working.
But how could you be doing that when you didn't even look back to see a reaction.
Draco didn't know what to think. He didn't even know what to feel, or more like let himself feel. Something had changed in the weeks you were away from him.
A revelation of sorts. He missed you. Missed what you would do for him. He regretted what he said and what he never had the chance to say. Because maybe deep down those feelings had been returned, but he was just too stubborn to show.
And now he's seeing you realizing that you deserve more than blurred lines and assumptions. And he's realizing maybe Potter is that more that you deserve.
Draco doesn't like that one bit, he can't even stomach the thought. So he promises to himself that he will do everything in his power to win you back. Even if that means saying that he was sorry and admitting that he was in the wrong, something he's never had to do before.
But if that makes you his again and gets you away from Potter, then its worth it.
Part 2
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angry-geese · 3 years
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OSHA Non Compliance
Nanami Kento x Reader
Warnings: nsfw/minors do not interact. shameless smut. fingering, oral (fem and masc receiving), face riding, praise kink (kinda), multiple orgasms, mutual pining. gojo slander. a little dub con due to the sex pollen stuff. afab reader
Notes: some sex pollen smut with Nanami. i have a post thats pretty similar to this thats a gojo x reader which you can read here
Word Count: 3.3k
If there's one thing you two can agree on, it's how this is all Gojo’s fault.
The job was supposed to be simple; get in, exorcise the curse, get out. It wasn't a particularly deadly one, but it was proving to be difficult for lower grade sorcerers. Anyone who had come into contact with it fell violently ill, suffering effects that lasted between hours to days. The symptoms themselves varied from person to person. Nobody seemed to give a straight answer.
In response, you two were sent out.
As odd as it was, you didn't question it. Curses are odd, things like this happen. Two grade one sorcerers should have been enough to take this thing out. One alone should have been enough, not to mention the army of sorcerers sent after it before. Gojo wanted you to take backup just in case, shrugging you off when you asked why he couldn’t do it himself. You were certain you could take this alone, but he was insistent.
Reluctantly you dragged Nanami along.
The two of you weren't officially partners, but most of your jobs were done together. It was a mutual agreement. He found you much less annoying than Gojo. That's not to say he didn't find you annoying at first, but you were more tolerable. Nanami wasn’t much older than you—only by a few years—but he acted as a mentor when you first started out. You quickly improved, nearly rivaling him in strength. It wasn't long before you became a grade one sorcerer, same as him. On that day he was there to celebrate with you.
He likes to think you’ve turned out to be a semi-functional human being. Maybe he’s gotten sentimental as he’s grown older. He hated for his work life to cross over into his home life, but he’s made an exception for you. Any time you’d call, he’d come running.
The curse had taken up residence in an abandoned school, only being discovered when the building was being surveyed for possible reuse. You’re not sure why nobody had noticed it sooner, but you’ve learned not to question a curse’s behavior.
It’s attack had a strange area of effect. You've never seen anything like it. The fact that such a non-lethal curse was considered such a high grade should have tipped you off in the first place. The curse released some strange sort of fumes. Or spores. You really weren't certain what they were. It was airborne and you knew that you needed to stay far away.
While the direct hit missed you, you were still affected. You took in a lung-full of the stuff before you managed to get away.
If it weren't for Nanami…
You barely make it back to the car. You’re not injured, so much as you’re lightheaded, and nauseous.
“I’m not going to make it back to the school.” You say.
“Are you hurt?” He asks.
Slowly you shake your head. It's not wrong, per se, but it's not right either. This is a strange type of hurt.
Your apartment is closer. The drive was twenty minutes on the way there; you make it back in about eight.
You’re not sure what to do once you get inside other than contemplate your life choices. You toss your keys and bag aside. There's not much you can do aside from flop down on your couch and pray. Not that you’re the praying type normally, but what could it hurt?
The effects of the pollen seem to hit you all at once. The sickly sweet taste in your mouth makes you gag. You fall to your hands and knees and retch, but nothing comes up. If you thought you felt bad before, you definitely do now. Sweat beads on your forehead. You feel jittery, yet lethargic. Heat radiates off your skin like a furnace. Your mouth has gone dry. Your clothes feel too tight. You’d claw them off your body if your partner wasn't sitting a few feet away.
You swallow hard as heat begins to pool between your legs. You shift uncomfortably, trying to get some relief.
While you’re slowly losing it, Nanami looks fine. As calm and collected as ever.
Nanami didn't seem to get the brunt of that attack. Or maybe he's better at hiding it than you.
He is.
He’s been dealing with an aching cock since you two left that building. He was all-too aware of every corner and bump on the ride home. You were too busy trying to escape with your dignity to notice him, and the tent that grows in his pants. He covers his lap with his suit jacket. You think nothing of it.
He studies every dip and curve of your clothed body. They cling to your skin with sweat in a way that makes his cock throb. Nanami knows how wrong it is. He shouldn't feel this way. You're his damn partner! Looking at you this feels so wrong.
In an attempt to comfort you, he smooths a hand across your back, gently squeezing your shoulder. Sweat beads in your hairline. Your chest heaves.
“I don't think it’s something we can wait out,” you say, swallowing hard.
“What are we-” it’s as if he didn't realize what he was asking. His eyes go wide, before his gaze shoots straight to the ground.
“‘Ken-” You say, hoping he can't hear the way your voice trembles, “I feel like I’ll die if you don't touch me.”
It's with a sinking, horrifying feeling that he agrees. Slowly you climb into his lap. It feels wrong. But your body fits perfectly against his. He’s your partner—your friend—you shouldn't be wanting him this way. He’s pliant against your touch, moving with you, paying close attention to each and every one of your movements. Every cell of your being wants him to fuck you.
“I know.” He says. “Me too.”
He hauls you into his arms, setting you down on the couch back-first. The sudden weightlessness you feel makes you gasp. There's nothing gentle behind his touch. Your hands work to undo the buttons of his shirt, but they tremble so bad it's hard to do.
“Don't worry about that.” He coos. "Let me take care of you."
With shaky hands he undoes the buttons on your pants, sliding them down your legs. His face heats up at the way your panties are already soaked through. All this just for him?
He tries not to stare too long. If you were the only thing he looked at for the rest of his life, he'd be content.
He strokes at your clit through the thin fabric of your panties. He almost seems afraid to touch you. For a moment he is, but that quickly wears off when you moan. He can't help but watch the way you squirm and writhe under his touch. How the delicate fabric clings to your skin from how wet you are. He hates how much he enjoys seeing you like this. It feels wrong.
“Please,” there’s a hazy look in your eyes.
He swallows hard. You’re not thinking straight, he thinks, this is so wrong.
He pulls down your panties, throwing them aside with your pants. You tug off your shirt, quickly tossing it aside. His hands come up to palm at your breasts through the fabric of your bra. He gently tugs the fabric down, exposing your breasts. Your nipples harden in the cool air. As wrong as it feels, you would be lying if you said your partner wasn't attractive. Not only is he handsome, and one of the most powerful sorcerers you have met, he was a close—if not your closest—friend.
Nanami’s touches are feather-light. It's not that he's worried about hurting you—though the fear of that is there—he doesn't want this to ruin your friendship. He doesn't want you to view him differently because of this. The two of you have gone through much together; he doesn't want this to make things awkward. He’s just wanted you for so long.
He never intended for his work life to cross over into his home life. That was until you came along. Nanami can't imagine a life without you around.
Two of his fingers press against your entrance, his thumb circling your clit. His fingers are long, and fairly thick. Only one enters you at first, but you’re wet enough he adds a second one not long after. His fingers curl, stroking against your g-spot. His touch feels like too much yet not enough. You desperately grind against his hand, chasing your own release.
If he can just get you to finish, maybe he can wait it out. You’ve clearly got it worse than him. Right?
He pulls you up into a kiss. His lips taste sweet. Your lips part, allowing his tongue into your mouth. His chest presses against yours. Your thighs tighten around his hand, though not in an attempt to stop him.
Heat pools low in your stomach, slowly building in intensity. You moan into Nanami's mouth. You're reduced to a whining, whimpering mess under his hand.
His free hand moves to cup your cheek, tilting your head so your gaze meets his. A sleepy grin spreads across your face. The pad of his thumb brushes over your glossy lips. In a moment of lucidity you wrap your lips around it, swirling your tongue around the digit.
Nanami almost forgets how to breathe. Nobody can get him nearly as flustered as you can.
The coil in your stomach snaps. If you knew how much you gushed around Nanami's fingers, you'd be blushing. Your cunt clenches around his fingers as you ride out your orgasm on his hand.
Your first orgasm provides no relief. In a matter of seconds—probably less time than that if you're being honest—you're ready for another round.
You work the last few buttons of his shirt open before he gets impatient and pulls the thing over his head. You let out an audible “oh!” at the sight of his chest. It's more toned than you expected; not that you’ve given it much thought.
“Like what you see?” He says in a sudden moment of boldness that it surprises both of you.
You nod. Now really isn't the time to be shy, but you can't help it.
He's painfully hard, his erect cock leaking precum against his thigh. The tent in his pants is impressive to say the least. You get on your knees, tugging his pants down his hips. You were right to notice his bulge. He's huge. Long and thick. Uncut too. The hairs towards the base of his cock are light—a similar sandy blonde as the hair on his head—and neatly trimmed. He always takes care of himself. A prominent vein runs up the bottom. A small pang of guilt hits you when you realize how needy his cock looks. His chest, the tips of his nose and ears, and the head of his cock are all dusted with pink. He looks at you with such adoration it makes your chest flutter.
You slide off the couch, getting on your knees. Nanami parts his legs just enough for you to kneel between them.
His eyes go wide the moment your lips touch his cock. You press kitten licks to the tip, watching the way his lip twitches in frustration. Nanami’s hands bury in your hair. The feeling of his nails raking against your scalp makes goosebumps raise along your skin. What you can’t fit in your mouth, you stroke with your hands. Saliva runs down your chin in streams, tears stained black with eyeliner streaming down your cheeks.
The only sign that he’s about to orgasm is the way he tilts his head back, cursing.
When he cums, he cums a lot. It's thick, but runny, and has almost no taste to it at all. His cum spills out the corners of your mouth when you pull off of him, releasing him with a pop!
Without thinking, you swallow.
With how long he stares down at you, it almost seems like you’ve done something wrong.
You can't stop the squeak you let out as he hauls you into his lap. He lays back, guiding your hips so you’re kneeling above his face.
“What are you-”
“It’s only fair that I return the favor,” he says.
No matter how hard you try, he doesn't let you wriggle out of his grasp.
“I- I don't want to suffocate you.” You say.
The amount of his testicles Nanami would cut off just to get a taste of your cunt… He’ll give you a hint, it's more than one and less than three.
“You won't.” He said. Even if you could—which you couldn't, he’s stronger than he looks—he’d die happy.
Your thighs cradle his head in an almost perfect way. There's almost no better feeling. His tongue dips between your folds, circling your clit. You taste sweet, he notes. A kiss is pressed to your clit before long, slow strokes of a hot tongue lavish it in affection. He kneads your thighs gently all while alternating between licking and sucking on your bundle of nerves.
He wants nothing more than to take his time with you. After all, he’s got years to make up for.
You can feel and hear him panting against your dripping sex. He can do little to hide the way he grinds his bulge against the couch. He grunts when you tug his hair, guiding him to where you need him most.
There's a feeling of emptiness as you cum, your walls contracting around nothing where something should be. You ride out your orgasm with a series of short, high pitched moans, rocking your cunt against his mouth. Nanami takes all of it in stride, lewdly slurping at your sex. Your thighs shake, your cunt spasming as he continues to press kitten licks to your clit.
And god- the sight of his face; his lips wet and slick from your cunt, eyes hazy with lust, his hair a mess.
"It's no use." You say. It's in-between whimpers and moans. Even as your second orgasm approaches, you feel no sense of relief. "I need your cock."
He feels himself twitch with need. His cock barely went soft the first time he came. Nanami wants nothing more than to sink his length into your warm, wet cunt.
He doesn't bother carrying you to your room. He would have fucked you in the car if you asked. He’d fuck you on every flat surface of your apartment if you wanted him too.
His cock presses against your entrance, rubbing at your folds. He doesn't mean to tease you, he just wants to drag this out as long as he can. You're so wet you take his cock with no resistance. He groans at the feeling of your cunt as you sink onto him.
Cumming on his tongue is intoxicating, but it feels like nothing in comparison to his cock. Nothing substitutes for the hot, full sensation of his cock inside of you. You string together words in some desperate attempt to make a sentence. Being completely filled is making you woozy. Nanami fits just so well inside of you. It's like you were made for this. You're not sure if it's the pollen, or just him, but you can feel every ridge and vein on his cock.
"Can't believe-" he huffs, "can't believe you got tighter after cumming twice."
"Please Ken," you whimper.
It hurts, but it feels too nice to stop. Nanami can't tear his eyes away from the way your tits bounce as you ride him. The sounds of skin slapping on skin echo through the room, mingling with his grunts and your moans, creating a lewd cacophony.
"Fuck," he says, his seemingly calm demeanor fading, "you're so fucking pretty."
Gojo would give him shit about this for weeks if he knew…
You're starting to think he meant to do this.
"I'm going to kill him," you say, although it's hard to stay mad for long.
“Me too,” he says.
Your orgasm rolls over you like a wave, throwing you around and spitting you back out, leaving you an absolute mess. Tears prick at the corners of your eyes. Eyeliner runs down your face in streams, leaving black trails across your skin. It's the first time you've cum from g-spot stimulation alone. But it's also the same as the other two times you've cum: you're ready for another round instantly.
At some point in time Nanami gets on top. Your legs lock around his back, pulling him in. Maybe you blacked out. Exhaustion creeps into your limbs, leaving them sore and wobbly.
Nanami thrusts harder, trying to quell the fire that pits in his stomach. He doesn't warn you that he's coming. If he's being honest, he didn't know he was either. You just feel hot ropes of his cum fill you, spilling out, staining your couch. When he cums, his cock doesn't even go soft. If anything he’s harder. Almost instantly he’s ready for another round. He's never felt anything quite like this.
The sensation of his cum dripping out of you, running down your thighs in streams is bizarre. There's so much of it. You don't want him to stop. He brings a hand down to give your ignored clit some attention. His spare hand wipes your tears away, his thumb gently brushing across your cheek.
Even as he's made you cum for the nth time tonight he doesn't stop. The two of you can only fuck and cum until you're no longer sure where your body ends and his begins. It doesn't feel like enough. You’ve never been so full. He wants to cum in you and breed you until your womb is swollen with his child.
At some point he collapses from exhaustion—he thinks—and he's certain the two of you are going to die. No human can survive this, he thinks, that's impossible.
Neither of you died.
It could be minutes, it could be hours; by the time you wake up the sun has set completely. You're not sure what time it is, but judging by how long the sky's been dark, it must have been a while. Nanami snores softly, his drool pooling in the valley between your breasts. You card a hand through his hair, brushing it out of his eyes. One of his eyes cracks open. He can't tell if he’s dreaming or not. If he is, then this is too good to be true.
"You still with me?" You ask.
He nods.
You're cradled chest to chest, his heartbeat as steady and alive as ever. He pulls out slowly, admiring the mess between your thighs. Even in his sobering state he finds you truly beautiful. From the way your skin glints with sweat to the way you run your tongue over your parched lips. You stretch out, trying to work the stiffness out of your limbs. You’re certain you’ll be sore in the morning.
Nanami disappears into the kitchen, returning with two glasses of water. What you could really use is a shower.
If you want, he'll never mention this again. He's starstruck by your naked form, his cum dripping down your thighs. Part of him wants to see you like this every night. But that might still be the pollen talking.
He's sputtering out an apology; stringing words together in hopes of begging for your forgiveness.
"I didn't think that's how it'd happen," you say, shrugging, "but…"
You really can't complain. Everyone but Nanami seemed to realize how head over heels you were for each other.
"You… liked it?" He asks.
If you didn't like it, he would know. Nanami can't believe it.
"Minus the nearly dying part." You say. "I've spent the past year and a half trying to get in your pants. So yeah."
Instantly his face turns red. How has he not noticed? He's both mortified, and relieved that you feel the same—or at least similar to him. Then the embarrassment hits him. He didn't think he could be more embarrassed than he was standing naked in your living room.
"I'm gonna go shower." You say. He gives a nod in response, stopping dead in his tracks when you say: "join me."
460 notes · View notes
waitineedaname · 3 years
Note
"Accidently ending a phone call with your roommate with a casual ‘I love you’ seems like a very good reason to move out"
For benrey @ gordon?
“And can you pick up some oat milk while you’re there? I just realized I’m out.”
“Man, oat milk freaks me out,” Benrey said, pushing their shopping cart towards the dairy section anyway. “Like, do oats even have, uh. Others?”
“Others?” There was a beat of silence as Gordon attempted to figure out exactly what the hell Benrey was talking about. “You mean udders?”
“Yeah. Cow things.”
“Dude, that’s not how oat milk works.” Gordon’s laugh made Benrey’s cheap phone speakers crackle.
“Then how does it work? Huh? Mister scientician?” Benrey propped the phone between their ear and shoulder as they opened the fridge door to grab the brand of oat milk he knew Gordon liked.
“I don’t fucking know! I’m not a goddamn milk scientist.” Even through a phone call, Benrey could hear the smile on Gordon’s face. “They squeeze juice out of the oats or smush them into a paste or something. I don’t know. Stop making me think about how oat milk works, it’s going to make me not want to drink it anymore.”
“Cool, so I’ll buy milk with extra lactose then.”
“You will not, unless you wanna deal with me laying on the couch complaining all afternoon because my stomach hurts.”
“You do that anyway.”
“Fuck off, man.” Gordon’s tone of voice didn’t carry any bite to it. “Alright, I gotta go, I’m almost at the end of the queue to pick Joshie up. I’ll see you back at home, okay?”
“Mhm. Love you, bye.” Benrey hung up and shoved their phone back in their jacket pocket. They unfolded the shopping list and attempted to decipher the mix of their own chicken scratch, Gordon’s doctor handwriting, and the occasional misspelled request for snacks in Joshua’s six year old handwriting. Okay, they had to get those frozen chicken nuggets Joshua liked, another pack of seltzer, a can of black beans since Gordon was planning to cook dinner tonight-
Thinking about Gordon made them suddenly freeze in place as they realized what they’d just done. Did… Did they just say “love you” on the phone with Gordon?
Aw, fuck.
They’d been living with Gordon for a while now. It hadn’t always been an easy thing for either of them. When they’d been freshly respawned, both of them had been jumpy around each other at best, and at worst, they were at each other’s throats trying to kill each other. It took a long time and a lot of uncomfortable conversations for them to get to the point where they could interact without an unbearable amount of tension. From there, they were able to start rebuilding an actual friendship. Turns out, they got along a lot better when they weren’t in mortal danger. Who knew!
Living with Gordon involved a lot of rules, both spoken and unspoken. They involved stuff like “don’t ask weird questions about Gordon’s feet,” “if one of them gets too angry, walk it off instead of actually fighting,” and “no gross body horror in front of Gordon’s son.” It also involved shit like “please for the love of god don’t put empty juice cartons back in the fridge” and “don’t stain the carpets with Sweet Voice, this is a rental and that security deposit is worth getting back.” So far, Benrey hadn’t had too much trouble following the rules. They had been a security guard, after all; following rules was supposed to be their thing. Besides, they were a low price to pay to get to spend time with Gordon.
One of those early unspoken rules, however, had been “keep the flirting to a minimum.” That one had been a little tricky at first, but it had been necessary, especially back when they still weren’t on the best of terms. Benrey learned that when Gordon was already worked up, blowing a kiss did the opposite of diffusing the situation. This was news to Benrey. Who didn’t love a little kiss from their buddies? Lame.
That had been an early rule, though, and one that had kind of faded into the background over time. The longer they lived together, the more physically affectionate they both got, and a little domesticity is only to be expected when you share a household. It was nice. Comfortable.
And then Benrey had to go and say “I love you” on the phone. What the fuck.
That had to be crossing a line, right? Gordon was fine with some handholding and some cuddling and they’d make dinner together once a week, but this had to be pushing it.
Benrey went through the rote motions of buying the rest of their groceries without really paying attention, too busy panicking. There was only one option. They had to move out. This was fine. This was totally fine. They could just crash on Tommy’s couch until they find a place of their own because there was no way this wasn’t going to make Gordon freak the fuck out. As much as they loved fucking with Gordon, they’d learned there was the fun kind of freaking him out and the bad kind of freaking him out. They were fairly certain this fell into the bad category.
By the time that they were walking up to their apartment door, they were already mentally packing up all their things, resigned to their fate. They were so stuck in their own head that Joshua barreling into their legs when they opened the door actually startled them.
“Benny!” Joshua cheered, clinging to their jeans.
“Hey, li’l dude.” Benrey carefully tried to push past the kid without tripping over him on the way to the kitchen. Tragically, that’s where Gordon also happened to be.
“Hey, what took you so long?” Gordon asked, taking some of the grocery bags from them. “I thought you’d gotten lost in Costco again.”
Benrey grunted noncommittally and started putting away groceries instead of answering Gordon. Maybe if they didn’t look at him, they could avoid confronting whatever Gordon’s reaction was. Yeah, definitely, this seemed like a sustainable, reasonable decision to make. Yep.
“Dude.” Gordon’s hand suddenly appeared on their forearm. Benrey stared at it, then looked up at Gordon’s concerned face. “Are you okay?”
“Huh?”
“You’re putting carrots in the utensil drawer.”
Benrey looked down at their hands again. Oh. So they were.
“You’ve been acting weird ever since you got back from the store,” Gordon said, gently taking the carrots away from them. “Did something happen? You wanna talk about it?”
Benrey screwed their mouth up. No, they didn’t want to talk about it, but learning how to talk through things like adults was something they both had agreed to do. That had been a rule introduced by an exasperated Tommy, sick of mediating their bullshit. So, they sighed and looked away while Gordon put the carrots in the vegetable drawer of the fridge. “I was thinking about how I’ve gotta move out.”
“What?” Gordon stood up too fast and smacked his head on the freezer door. He swore loudly, and Benrey reached over to hand him a bag of frozen peas to put on the back of his head. “Thanks. But also, what? Since when are you moving out?”
“Uh, since now?�� Benrey said, confused. Shouldn’t it be obvious?
“Why?”
“‘Cause I said I love you on the phone? Dummy? You, uh, a fucking old man got bad brain disease, not remembering things?” They said, defaulting to picking on Gordon to avoid focusing on anything else. Gordon stared blankly at them for a moment, then, against all odds, a grin spread across his face.
“Benrey,” He said, and Benrey decided he didn't like that tone one bit, “Are you embarrassed?”
“Whuh? No.” There was no way they could be embarrassed. That definitely wasn't what was going on here. Nope. Not a bit, “...Maybe.”
“Dude, you don't have to be embarrassed about that.” Gordon laughed. “Do you know how often I've said stupid Freudian slips? I called my sixth grade teacher mom once and wanted to change my name and move to Canada. I've been there.”
“It wasn't, uh… It wasn't too much? Not crossing a line or anything?”
“Nah, man. It was kinda sweet.” Gordon flashed him a smile and finished putting away the last of the groceries.
“Cool.” Benrey relaxed, letting go of the tension that had been building in their shoulders. “That's good ‘cause I was gonna fight you for custody of your Xbox.” Gordon snorted.
“Good fucking luck, you’re too much of a Playstation guy to win that case.”
The evening passed relatively uneventfully from there. Gordon enlisted Benrey’s help in cooking dinner, and Joshua eagerly told them all about the cool dinosaur facts he’d learned in class that day. They went through the easy routine of watching just one episode (which of course always turned into several episodes) of Joshua’s choice of TV, then Benrey helped wash up in the kitchen while Gordon put Josh to bed. Gordon joined them as they finished washing dishes and squeezed Benrey’s shoulder affectionately when they were done.
“Alright, man, I think I’m gonna head to bed early tonight.”
Benrey nodded. “Cool. I’ll be quiet.”
“Don’t worry about it. G’night, dude.”
“Night, Gordon.”
“Oh, and Benrey?” Gordon paused in the doorway of his bedroom and waited until Benrey glanced up at him. Gordon smiled. “Love you too.”
He shut the door before Benrey could respond, leaving Benrey to stare blankly at the door. They let out a groan, careful not to wake Joshua. Oh, Gordon was going to be the death of them.
357 notes · View notes
justauthoring · 3 years
Text
The Words I Didn’t Mean
Prompt: Hi!!!! Would you be able to write a Bokuto x reader fic where they had an argument the night before a game. The reader ends up being really late to the game, so Bokuto is worried that they want to ends things with him and won’t be showing up at all. He is in his emo mode and the whole team is trying to help. Nothing works until the reader finally shows up and they have a happy ending!! Requested by: anonymous.
A/N: It got a lil rushed at the end :( but I hope you still like it! Pairing: Bokuto Koutarou x F!Reader
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"He won't want to see me."
Kaori sighs, her grip on your shoulders never relenting as she continues to shove you forward. "You're being silly."
Planting the heels of your feet firmly into the ground, you effectively stop her constant pushing (pushing around the big baby known as Bokuto has definitely made you stronger then you were before), spinning around to face her. "I'm not," you huff, voice sharp, before sighing at the look she sends you.
Crossing your arms over your chest, you bite your lip, looking down at your feet. "I'm really not," you whisper, voice cracking at the end of it despite yourself. You promptly choose to ignore the pitiful look the third year manager sends you, glancing behind you at the doors to the game, where you knew Bokuto was. "He was really upset with me last night. I've never seen him that angry."
"Then, why'd you come?"
Blinking, you turn back to Kaori, eyes wide.
She just shakes her head; "you say he doesn't want to see you. Well, then, why'd you come?"
Flushing faintly, you fiddle with your fingers, biting your lip. "I dunno," you mumble, voice barely audible. "It felt weird not to come to one of his games. I've been to every one since we started dating."
Sighing, Kaori lets her arms fall to her sides, taking a small step towards you. "Look, I don't know what happened last night, but he does want to see you." And at the look of disbelief you send her, she quickly adds. "He does. He'd been a nervous wreck before the game, waiting for you to come. And when you didn't, he got even worse. Coach literally had to swap him out."
Your eyes widen even further at that. Bokuto was known for having his 'emo' modes, but it was very, very rarely ever bad enough that Coach had to take the captain off the court. He was Fukurodani's star player, and when he did get into one of his modes, he didn't take very long to give him the determination to get back into it.
But to be sent to the bench?
Maybe Bokuto was more upset then you thought he was.
"I'm not asking you to choose, I just--!"
"That's exactly what it sounds like," Bokuto interrupts, voice harsh and cutting as he glares at you. "You know how important these next few weeks are. I can't slack off on training!"
"I'm not telling you to slack off!" You all but scream back, your emotions getting the best of you as you all but forget to think rationally. "I'm just asking you that you tell me what days you're training, so I can at least be there!"
Bokuto huffs, and the action is so odd for the normally exuberant and bright-eyed boy that even in your distress state, it has your heart panging painfully.
"You'll just be a distraction."
But nothing hurts more then those words.
Lips parting, you struggle to the find the words. Bokuto has never said such hurtful words before, nor do you both ever really get into arguments. However, what has you railing is the fact that up until this point, you'd thought that your presence at both games and training had been comforting to Bokuto.
He always talked about how he loved having you there, loved being able to show off what he'd learned or perfected. He'd always told you that you being there made him feel like he was at his best.
Was that all just a lie?
“Oh,” is all you finally manage. All anger and frustration from before just dissipates with a single blink of the eye, and your heart hurts as you step back, moving to turn. 
You don’t say anything. You don’t see the realization that dawns on Bokuto’s face, of what he said, of how he hurt you, and you promptly ignore the way he calls after you when you rush out of the school gym doors, wanting nothing more then to just be alone.
It’s why you came late to the game.
You spent over a half hour debating on if you should come, after having gotten ready already. When you’d finally managed to convince yourself to come, and had arrived at the gym, you’d been about to turn around and go back home when Kaori had found you. 
Bokuto had told you you were a distraction. So, you hardly doubt he’d want you at one of the most important games of the season.
Still, you couldn’t deny that it hurt your heart a little at the thought of not being there for him. 
“Just... Just please, go in and you’ll see.” 
Turning back to Kaori, you sigh. “Fine.”
So, mustering up all your courage and strength, you make your way towards the gym, this time of your own free will, pushing the doors open with a sharp inhale. The game is in motion when you walk in, the sounds of cheering and the volleyball being smacked around the first thing you hear. As you walk past the benches, Kaori right behind you, you’re steered towards Fukurodani’s side.
You’re not allowed onto the court, but Kaori is quick to rush towards the coaches and Bokuto.
You frown when you see him; his back is turned to you, but you notice the specific notions and features that you tell you everything Kaori had said was true. His back is slouched, and his arms hang pitifully by his sides. His hair drops at the edges, turning downwards, and even though you can’t see his face, you can imagine the pout and the disappointed look in his eyes.
Kaori reaches him, and you can’t hear what she’s saying, but she’s rapidly poking him on the shoulders, until he finally looks up at her and then in the direction she points; you.
You inhale sharply when his eyes meet yours, and you offer a nervous smile, terrified that he’ll be upset that you’re here. Or worse, he’ll be angry. The two of you never made up from the night before, what if you were the absolute last person he wanted to see right now?
Not to mention, he’d made it perfectly clear; you were a distraction.
But, instead, his eyes brighten, and he sits up and there’s an almost sparkle that radiates around him as a bright grin crosses his features. He looks ecstatic, and almost like he wants to bolt from his spot on the bench next to the coach to you, but Kaori holds him firm in the spot, whispering something to him.
You glance at the score board, wincing when you realize the opposite team was about to take the second set and win the game.
Turning back to Bokuto, you realize he’s standing and the coach is debriefing him; which means he’s going back onto the court. Swallowing thickly, you move to find a seat, easily finding one near the front, close to Fukurodani’s side of the court. And the minute you sit, Bokuto’s already looking at you, a hopeful look in his eyes.
Mustering up a smile, you nod at him, giving him a thumbs up.
They take the second set, and then, the third.
Everybody cheering for Fukurodani lets out a collective sigh of relief, and even though you hadn’t been there to see it; from what you’d gathered the first half of the game had been stressful to say the least. Everyone was in shock to see Fukurodani’s star ace so out of sorts and not on his a-game which left you feeling a little guilty.
What were you suppose to think, though? After what Bokuto had said to you?
But, when the games over, and you’re left wondering if you should approach Bokuto or just go home; you’re almost completely knocked off your feet by the large body that comes flying at you. Your name leaves Bokuto’s lips in a cry and suddenly he’s engulfing you completely, pulling you close against you and practically leaving you no breathing room.
“I didn’t mean it,” he all but spits out, as if rushed for you to understand. “What I said,” Bokuto pulls back, holding you tight by the shoulders as he looks pleadingly at you. “Please, I didn’t mean it. Any of it. I was just frustrated with it all and nervous for this game and I wasn’t thinking. And I hurt you. I really hurt you, and when you left last night, I didn’t know if I should’ve gone after you. But I thought, I should let you have your space and then you weren’t here--
“Ko. Ko!” You call, interrupting him as you desperately shake your head. He falls silent to a halt, and your hands fall on his chest, gripping his admittedly sweaty jersey inbetween your fingers, shaking your head. “It’s okay,” you whisper, meeting his gaze. “I’m sorry too. I... I wasn’t being fair.”
“No,” he adamantly shakes his head. “You were just trying to be there for me, and I pushed you aside. I’m sorry. And Y/N?”
Gently tipping your gaze up at him, Bokuto smiles down at you.
“You’re not a distraction. You never could be. You make me a better player, you help me do better. I need you.”
And honestly, that was all you wanted to hear.
Eyes watering slightly, you lick your lips; “you mean it?”
“Yes,” he whispers, “a million times over.”
Leaning into him, you let out a sigh of relief; “thank god,” you let out shakily. “Because I love coming to your training and games, I love being there for you, even if I can’t actually be with you. Just watching is enough for me.”
Squeezing you tightly, Bokuto nods; “it’s more then enough.”
502 notes · View notes
seijorhi · 3 years
Text
insidious
Hinata Shoyo x female reader (+ Miya Atsumu x female reader)
tw dub-con/non-con, yandere, voyeurism, nsfw, smut but like just a sprinkle
Atsumu’s never considered himself much of a relationship guru, but surely he can’t be the only one who notices there’s something real fuckin’ weird about your relationship with Hinata.
Admittedly, the first few times he met you, he wasn’t paying all that much attention. Sure, you were hot, and he’d be a liar if he said he hadn’t snuck a peek every now and then; but his focus has always been on the game, on his teammates. On himself as a setter. It’s why he’s got a strict no girlfriends policy during the season. Atsumu doesn’t do distractions.
And he likes Hinata. On the court, the little dude’s a monster for him to unleash and he’d love him for that alone, but somehow despite being a 5’7” excitable ball of crazy intensity off the court as well, the redhead’s impossible not to get along with. 
There’s a few guys on the team that have partners – fuck, Meian’s even married, his wife five months pregnant with their second kid. But it doesn’t hit him until maybe three or so weeks after Hinata joins the team that he’s never seen any of them (or the ones that came before them) show up at every single training session. 
You do. 
Rain, hail or shine, no matter how early Hinata starts or how late he stays, you’re there, sitting in the stands, just… watching. It’s not a bad thing exactly. He knows Bo thinks it’s cute, gets all moony eyed and sappy about it and Hinata certainly doesn’t seem bothered by it, beaming up at you after every point scored, every successful spike, every receive. 
But it’s just– they train six days a week. It’s long hours and a lot of it’s just drills and exercising till they’re dead on the floor, and even hardcore volleyball fans would find it boring to sit through day in and day out. You don’t take a book or sit there on your phone; you just watch idly as they train. 
Day in, day out. 
There ain’t a rule against it; their practices are closed to the public but the team have a few passes they can hand around on the odd occasion. It’s more of an unspoken understanding; you can invite who you want, so long as you’re focused and they don’t make a fuss.
You never do though, quiet as a mouse as you wait for Hinata to finish up. 
“Don’tcha think it’s weird though?” he asks Sakusa one afternoon, wiping the sweat from his brow as he watches Hinata slump down beside you after practice wraps up, pulling you into a nuzzling embrace.
Sakusa makes a noncommittal noise, but dark eyes regard the two of you nonetheless. “She moved with him from Brazil, didn’t she?” 
Atsumu shrugs, “And?”
“She doesn’t have any friends or family here, no roots, no job, just Hinata,” he says – slowly, like Atsumu’s an idiot. 
And he tries to put himself in your shoes for a minute, imagine what it would be like to follow someone halfway across the world (further actually, because he’s pretty sure you weren’t from Brazil to begin with) but it’s not the same. Even without Samu, or his friends or his family, even in a country with weird customs and a language that wasn’t his own, Atsumu’s always been good at finding his feet. 
But he supposes he can understand why you cling to Hinata. Though it’s really more a case of Hinata clinging to you, ‘cause whenever he turns around, it’s the redhead who’s the one all over you, pulling you into cuddles, twining his fingers with yours, peppering your face with butterfly kisses. Like he’ll just die if he’s not touching you every second you’re together.
It’s either sickeningly cute or revoltingly excessive, and for the life of him Atsumu can’t figure out which. 
You’d think it’s his first relationship or something, that he’s stuck in some weird puppy love honeymoon phase, but from what he’s heard the two of you have been together for years now – that’s just the way Hinata is, apparently.
He shouldn’t be too surprised; the guy’s always first in line to jump on his back or try and tackle him to the floor after any successful play. Between him and Bokuto, he’s got more bruises littered over his body than a linebacker, but they’re a tactile team, and he usually gives as good as he gets. 
You’re not one for excessive PDA though. You never fight against the overbearing affection, don’t shrug it off or shrink away – at least, not from what he’s noticed – but Atsumu hasn’t seen you initiate anything more than a quick peck to his cheek when Hinata’s got you all bundled up in his arms.
And he gets that not every relationship has to be equal in that sense, different love languages and all that crap, but while you don’t fight it, you never seem… entirely comfortable with it either. Not in the ‘stop, we’re in public, please don’t’ kinda way, but–
He can’t put a finger on it. 
You smile at Hinata, cheer when he scores, let him pet and kiss and pull you around wherever he wants, but you never seem to relax properly, and it bothers him. He doesn’t know why it bothers him.
If he hadn’t met you, hadn’t known that you’d been with Hinata since he was dirt poor and moonlighting as a delivery boy in Brazil, he’d be tempted to think that you were only in it for the money. It’s not a bad plan, as far as these things go – find some up and coming athlete to place all your bets on, get him wrapped around your finger before success goes to his head. And he doesn’t know you all that well and has absolutely zero fucking justification to back it up, but you don’t strike him as the money hungry type.
You don’t strike him as anything, and maybe that’s part of the issue.
Hinata’s like a sun; he’s gonna eclipse anyone standing too close. That’s normal. The team; him and Sakusa, Bokuto, the others – they have their own talents to stand on, to push through and shine on their own, but you… 
Fuck, why does it even matter?
Why does it bother him? It ain’t his relationship. You never complain, you make Hinata happy – he’d have to be blind not to see how much that guy loves you – and he dotes on you, spoils the shit out of you, so why can’t he shake this feeling in his gut that something ain’t right there?
It ain’t his relationship, and Atsumu’s not stupid enough to stick his nose where it doesn’t belong.
It ain’t his relationship.
It’s not, and he has more important things to focus his time and energy on.
You aren’t his problem. Fuck, you’ve barely spoken more than a few sentences to him! There’s no reason for why he can’t get you and your stupid relationship with his wing spiker outta his mind. 
“Just admit ya wanna fuck her and stop bitchin’ about it,” Samu groans one night when Atsumu stops by the restaurant after training. “Yer looking for a problem between the two of them so ya don’t feel guilty about it.”
He scoffs and rolls his eyes, “Shut yer trap, wouldja, Samu? I said it ain’t like that!”
He’s not gonna stand there and deny that he thinks you’re hot, but that’s not what this is about. Never has been. 
It’s quiet between them for a moment, Atsumu angrily stabbing at the onigiri on his plate, but he feels it when Osamu looks at him. Really looks, dark eyes flickering across his face, reading him like an open book. Samu might enjoy giving him shit and winding him up just for the sake of it, but there’s nobody on earth who knows him better. 
Eventually he sighs, and the air feels different between them. Heavier, somehow. “What’re ya saying, Tsumu? Ya think Hinata’s hurting her or somethin’?”
Yes. 
No.
He knows Hinata. Well, for a few months at least, but peripherally for years. Ever since high school. And Atsumu’s had the displeasure of knowing guys like that, guys who liked to feel big and tough and strong and would gladly slap around some pretty thing just to feel all manly and shit, and Hinata’s not– 
He doesn’t treat you like you’re made of glass or anything, but every time he touches you, so much as looks at you with those bright eyes, it’s with this kind of intense, burning love that Atsumu just doesn’t understand, that honestly freaks him out a little. He’s never seen bruises littering your skin – at least, not the kind that Samu’s worried about. You don’t flinch away from Hinata’s touch. 
(You never look comfortable though. Never happy – not like Hinata is.)
No. He’s a good guy, he wouldn’t hurt a fly, and despite the lingering unease Atsumu has about the two of you, he doesn’t doubt for a second that Hinata is head over fucking heels in love with you. He wouldn’t hurt you.
He wouldn’t.
“No, ‘course not! I just…” he breaks off, shaking his head. And he chews on his lip for a moment, debating with himself whether he should actually admit what he’s been thinking the past few weeks or whether Samu’s just gonna call him a pussy or something and tell him to knock it off. “I get the feeling she doesn’t wanna be there. She’s smiling and sitting there all pretty, but it’s just… I dunno, it’s just weird.”
Osamu doesn’t say much after that, but he doesn’t really need to. He knows what his brother’s thinking. If you weren’t happy, you’d leave. If Hinata wasn’t treating you right, you’d leave. You’d tell someone. But it ain’t that simple, is it? 
Atsumu’s always had a problem sticking his nose where it doesn’t belong. 
The first game of the season’s a slam dunk, and while they’re usually pretty tame during the season, beating Kageyama and Ushijima, last year's undefeated champs is cause for celebration. He’s not surprised to see you there at the club, tucked under Hinata’s arm in some little black dress, all dolled up. You smile at him, a hollow, fleeting thing, and Atsumu hates how the sight of it makes his stomach clench. 
Sakusa, Bokuto and Inunaki arrive moments later, a drink’s shoved into his hands and he forces himself to think of other things. You aren’t his problem, you aren’t his girl, and he’s definitely not watching you dance, your back flush with Hinata’s front, the wing spiker’s hands splayed across your hips, his mouth trailing greedily along your neck. 
And for the first time since this whole stupid thing started, Atsumu recognises the ugly feeling stirring in the pit of his gut. It’s jealousy.
He’s played one of the best games of his life today, his team’s fucking amazing, the music’s good and the alcohol is free flowing – he should be happy. And there’s absolutely no reason he should be watching you out of the corner of his eye, waiting for an opening.
It shouldn’t make his heart skip a beat when Hinata leans down to whisper something in your ear, passing you his glass as he heads off to find the men’s. He’s midway through a conversation of his own with Adriah and Bokuto that he’s barely paying attention to, and there’s a voice in his head (one that sounds suspiciously like Samu’s) that tells him to just let it go, but his feet are already moving, a half hearted excuse spilling from his lips as he slips past them both to make his way over to you.
“Hey,” he says. His voice is too quiet, too breathless to carry across over the music, but he’s taller than you, taking up your space and he isn’t imagining the way that your eyes widen, a flicker of something passing your face before you school your features back into that same fake, pleasant smile. 
He doesn’t imagine the nervous look you dart over his shoulder in the direction Hinata walked off in. 
You take a delicate sip from your glass, the very same one you’ve been nursing since you arrived and he watches – watches – as you force yourself to relax, the tension easing from your shoulders, your posture softening. “Miya,” you greet, raising your voice just enough to be heard. “Congratulations on the win.”
It’s so polite, so fucking fake that it makes him wanna hurl. 
“Atsumu,” he corrects before he can help himself. Sakusa calls him Miya, but nobody else – nobody who knows him – does. He can’t bear the sound of it on your lips, like you’re nothing more than strangers. 
He’s talked to you before, right? Surely. 
You’re just standing there, perfectly at ease around him and the others – if not for the finger tapping anxiously against the stem of your glass, a tic he wonders if you’re even aware of. You might be able to fool the others – admittedly, they’re probably not paying you too much attention – but he’s used to picking up on the smallest details. 
And he’s become real good at reading you these past few weeks.
“So tell me, how’d the two of ya meet?” he asks instead, because he’s rushed in here with no game plan and it’s the first thing that comes to mind. He doesn’t even care about the answer; now that he’s finally here, finally has you to himself for a moment, he just wants to hear you talk. 
“Oh, um,” you swallow, ducking your head so you’re not meeting his gaze anymore. “It’s a little embarrassing–”
A familiar, bright laugh cuts you off, and Atsumu’s heart hammers when Hinata slaps him on the shoulder, “It’s not embarrassing, babe, it’s cute!” 
Deep brown eyes meet his; wide, glittering and freakishly intense and he fights the urge to recoil. He’s done nothing wrong, he knows that, but Hinata’s staring at him like every thought he’s ever had about you is written right across his face, plain as day.
And you – you look like a kid caught with their hand in the cookie jar, like Hinata’s stumbled on you shoving your tongue down his throat rather than just having an innocent, friendly conversation with his teammate. It’s a split second that stretches a lifetime, but when he dares to look over, you’re rigid, eyes wide and full of panic and he knows, he fucking knows that he’s right. 
“Tell him,” Hinata urges, wasting no time in slipping past Atsumu to take his place by your side.
His arm wraps around your waist, squeezing you gently, and after a single, tense beat, you comply. “O-on the first week of my trip to Brazil, I was mugged. Shoyo saw it all happen and chased after them – got my purse back for me, even walked me back home to make sure I was okay, patched me up and everything.” You pause, nibbling on your bottom lip as you gaze up at Hinata, “He was my knight in shining armour.”
Hinata preens as you smile, but it’s still wrong. Atsumu’s seen what hero worship looks like, what real love looks like, and he’ll hand it to you; you have the basics down pat, but you can’t fake everything. 
With bitterness and disgust eating away at his gut, it becomes suffocating, standing there trying to carry a conversation and pretending that whatever there is between the two of you is in any way fucking romantic–
It’s too much, like somebody has a grip on his lungs, viciously squeezing out the last of his breath, and he barely remembers to excuse himself before he’s shoving his way through the crowd, knocking Meian’s concerned hand away as he flees for the balcony.
The late summer night air’s warm and humid, but he gulps it down in big, gasping heaves, clinging to the rail like it’s a lifeline. 
You’re fucking with his head and he hates it. He hates that he can’t let this go, can’t get you out of his goddamn head no matter how hard he tries. Atsumu’s always been a selfish, arrogant bastard, why should he give two shits about some girl whose last name he doesn’t even know?
He wants to despise you. He wants to forget you, to shove you aside like he has every other distraction in his life. It’s not his problem you’ve found yourself in some fucked up relationship.
But he squeezes his eyes shut, and all Atsumu can see is your face. 
He stays out on that balcony until his body stops shaking, until the sweat on his forehead cools and he no longer feels like he’s gonna throw up. The beat of the music, spilling muted from the glass doors, wraps around him now that the pounding in his head’s subsided, tempting him back inside. Any other night, and he’d follow it, get absolutely shitfaced and party till he doesn’t remember his own name.
And as he stands there alone, staring up at the Tokyo city skyline, part of him almost wants to give in – to drink himself to oblivion. Because at least that’d be easier.
But he won’t.
Instead, Atsumu shoves his feelings down, musters up a lazy smirk and walks back inside. He has every intention of saying goodbye to at least a few of his teammates before heading back to the hotel room to crash, but as his eyes scan the crowded floor, he catches sight of something that stops him cold in his tracks.
Hinata has you pinned to the wall, his face buried in the crook of your neck, but that’s not what makes his heart skip a beat. It’s the way your dress is hiked up, your panties shoved to the side, Hinata’s hand between your thighs, fucking you on his fingers.
It’s the look on your face, screwed up in pleasure – or pain – biting down on your lip to stifle your cries. It wouldn’t make a difference. Nobody would be able to hear you over the music, and even if they could he doubts anyone would give a fuck.
His mouth dries out, every thought eddying from his head as he watches you cling to Hinata, your hands gripping his arms tight. Your makeup’s smudged, a tear spilling down your cheek catches the glittering lights of the club, but when your head tilts back he knows it’s a moan that leaves your lips. He can almost hear it, picture it in his mind. You’re shuddering, shaking your head even as your eyes are squeezed shut and the only sound Atsumu can hear is the restless thumping of his own heart.
And then your eyes flutter open and find his. He watches, frozen in place, transfixed in the worst possible way as mortification flashes across your features and your lips move–
Whatever you say to him, Hinata doesn’t stop. He just shifts a little, angles his body in a way that gives Atsumu a better view of your pussy and the attention he’s paying it. He can’t look away even if he desperately wants to, utterly enthralled by the slickness coating the digits, the way your thighs tremble and quake as those fingers curl inside of you, the little jolt you give when Hinata’s thumb rubs at your puffy clit.
Atsumu watches, equal parts horrified and mesmerised as he pushes you over the edge and you cum for him, a pleasured cry drowned out by the music, shaking and breathless and beautifully wrecked in his teammate’s arms. And as you all but collapse against him, Hinata finally turns to glance over his shoulder, meeting Atsumu’s stare.
And with his eyes fixed on the blonde, he whispers something into your ear that Atsumu doesn’t have a hope in hell of hearing, presses a soft, lingering kiss to your cheek and grins.
It’s enough to rip him out of his stupor, stumbling back with a gasp as his blood runs cold. Hinata knew, he knew he was watching – put on a fucking show for him, and suddenly the nausea returns, bile creeping up his throat and Atsumu can’t do a single thing but turn and flee.
Alone in his hotel room and not nearly drunk enough, he falls into a fitful sleep, the image of your face, tear stricken and beautiful as you fell to pieces on Hinata’s fingers, burned into the back of his eyelids. 
He doesn’t utter a word about it when Boktuo gives him shit for ducking out early the next day at training. He doesn’t so much as meet Hinata’s eye, though the redhead seems no different than usual, all but bouncing on his heels when the Coach runs through the game against the Adlers set by set.
He still gushes when Atsumu gives him a perfect set, beaming up at him with that thousand watt smile. He still offers to be paired off with him when they run two-on-two games, isn’t ruffled when Atsumu instead grabs Sakusa and goes up against Adriah and Barnes.
And you’re still sitting in the stands, fingers twined on your lap, smiling dutifully whenever your boyfriend glances up.
Atsumu tries his best to ignore you and focus on training. He can’t afford to let you distract him any more than you already have, but in the quiet moments between sets, on their breaks, every second he’s not thinking about the game and his performance and his team his thoughts drift back to you. The way you’d bitten down on your bottom lip. Your eyes, pupils blown wide as pleasure crashed through you. Your glistening cunt, swallowing up Hinata’s fingers. The cute little noises you made – the ones he couldn’t hear but spent all fucking night imagining.
And the moment those thoughts enter his head, he can’t stop himself from darting a quick glance towards you, like he’s making sure you’re still there, that you’re okay. Even if you stiffen almost imperceptibly every time he does.
He can’t help himself, and he’s not the only one who notices. 
“Dude, you good?” Bokuto asks, pulling him aside a week or so later during one of their water breaks. And for a second there, there’s a flicker of indignation – whatever’s going on with his head, his performance is beyond question; he’s killing it. 
It’s not until the wing spiker’s attention shifts, risking a glance over his shoulder to where he knows you’re sitting that he realises that’s not what Bokkun’s worried about.
“Look, I get it, she’s cute and all, but…” Bokuto trails off, awkwardly scratching at the back of his neck. Every ounce of discomfort is written clear as day across his face. “You might wanna tone it down a bit, you know? For everyone’s sake.”
The irony of it all doesn’t escape him. And he probably should feel some kinda shame, because if Bokuto’s noticed then that means every goddamn one of the others has too and they’re all just too uncomfortable to say anything, but he can’t seem to muster it. 
“Yeah,” he croaks out instead.
Two days later he’s halfway through a shower when the stall beside his bursts open and he hears that familiar, sunny laugh, the sound of two bodies clambering into a space too small, and his heart stutters in his chest.
“Sho, no. I-I don’t wanna–”
“Shh, be good for me, alright baby? Please?” 
A drawn out hiss followed by a breathy moan, and Atsumu’s bracing himself against the tiled wall squeezing his eyes shut.
The spray of the shower isn’t loud enough to drown out the sounds of you swallowing down Hinata’s cock. And he can’t move, can’t make a sound for fear of making this worse, but with every lewd, messy gluck from your throat, every obnoxious moan that spills from his teammate’s lips, Atsumu feels that telltale stirring in his gut.
His eyes are closed and the image comes unbidden to his mind.
You on your knees, looking up at him with those big, wide innocent eyes. You, pressing soft, teasing kisses to his cock, your tongue slowly trailing along the thick vein that runs along the underside of his shaft. The way it’d swirl around his flushed head, eagerly lapping at his precum. Fuck, his cock’s already throbbing, aching. 
He’s only human, he thinks as he wraps a hand around his member, teeth sinking into the flesh of his forearm to stifle his groan. You’re making a mess of him, he wants it so fucking bad. Wants you; to fuck you, have you, hold you, he doesn’t give a shit anymore, you’re driving him to the brink and he’s helpless to stop this.
He can see it so perfectly in his head, how you’d look with those soft lips wrapped around him, the way you’d massage his balls as he fucked your face, how you’d choke on it. You’d be good, so fucking perfect as you sucked him off–
Hinata’s chanting your name and Atsumu picks up his pace, strokes turning into pumps, his fist tightening as he hisses with pleasure. Distantly he wonders whether they can hear it too; his heavy breathing, the slick, wet sound of him jerking off less than a foot away.
He doesn’t care anymore, can’t hold himself back. It’s blinding, the pleasure that rips through him, shaking him to his very core as spurt after spurt of thick, hot cum paints the shower walls.
His knees buckle, his cock still twitching as aftershocks jolt through him, stealing his breath. For a blissful moment, Atsumu lets himself sag against the tiles, a lazy smirk coating his face as he basks in the afterglow, his heartbeat slowly coming down from it’s racing high. 
And yet as the warm water of the shower cascades down his toned body, his breathing returning to normal something unpleasant begins to unfurl in his stomach, toxic and cloying, seeping through his veins. All that bliss, that heady, addictive pleasure fades away and Atsumu’s left with the weight of what he’s just done.
Distantly, he registers that it’s quieter now in the stall next to his. Hinata’s murmuring something to you, but Atsumu can’t make sense of it over the dull roar in his head, the disgust and shame that coils like a noose around his throat.
He should hate himself. 
He just might, actually.
And it’s not enough to scrub until his skin’s raw and he doesn’t feel it crawling anymore, doesn’t matter that he stays in the shower until the two of you leave, until the water runs ice cold and it physically hurts to stand under the spray.
Hinata’s still in the locker room when he gets out, slowly gathering the last of his things and shoving them into his duffle bag. For once you’re not by his side, and Atsumu can only thank whatever godly beings might be out there for this one, tiny mercy, because he doesn’t think he can bear to see you after what he’s just done.
But Hinata just smiles, bright and cheerful and all too knowing, “Seeya tomorrow, Atsumu!”
And he feels filthy all over again.
886 notes · View notes
difx-writes · 3 years
Text
Wildest Dreams - In the Death of the Night
Masterlist
After turning 10 and losing her soulmate, Marinette would imagine how Damian Wayne would be.
Would he be tall or short? Did he have blond hair or brown or did he dyed it? Would he be shy or have a bold personality? Perhaps he was an artistic soul, a poet, a writer? Or would he be a baker like her parents? Why did his last name change?
The wonders and questions took over her mind for days with no end.
On good days, she imagined how he would interact with her friends, how her parents would take him in as their own son, how he would fit into her life.
She liked to talk to him, pretending there, alive, with her. She asked his opinion on what to wear, how she should do her hair, what colors with go well with the design. He was her voice of reason. Talking to "Damian" brought a smile to her face, even when she knew she was deluding herself.
On bad days, she pretended he was right there with her, comforting her, encouraging her, whispering that everything would be alright... Sometimes it worked and she felt better the next days but most times she felt bitter, she felt robbed of a future where he was in her life.
The realization that the person she was supposed to share her soul with was no longer alive, that his death was painful, gruesome, and... lonely... It always ended with her taking a few days to prevent a breakdown...
When she turned 13, Hawkmoth appeared and Marinette became Ladybug, the hero of Paris.
Soon after, Marinette stopped talking with "Damian", she couldn't afford to wonder about him anymore. She couldn't afford the bliss of her own delusions. She couldn't afford to let herself grief and fall pray to Hawkmoth's manipulation.
As she couldn't fail Paris and its citizens, Damian Wayne mostly disappeared from her life.
But there were days when her “friends” demanded a lot from her, akumas were too violent and draining and everything was just too much, those the godawful days.
On godawful days she wished Damian was there to take her away to a place she could feel she belonged. Away from everything to a place she could call a home.
_______
Most nights Damian recalls a voice talking to him during the time he was dead.
His soulmate, he supposed, talked to him regularly, she started her day asking his opinion on her outfit for the day, when at home she would tell him how her day went, what she did with her friends, what she learned in class, etc...
At first, Damian was pretty much annoyed that he couldn't "rest in peace" with all the noise pollution but after a few weeks, he slowly started to tolerate her talking to him.
Unfortunately, he couldn't talk to her nor see her very clearly so it was a pleasant surprise when Marinette would ask his opinion to make a decision, she always picked what he chooses.
Perhaps it was their bond that allowed her to know what he was thinking without actually hearing each other's thoughts. Or maybe they were more in sync with one another. Most likely it was pure luck on her part. (Him being dead is enough proof of how bad his luck was.)
In the months he was dead, Damian learned a grand lot Marinette. He liked how she made him feel he wasn't alone, like how her voice calmed him when he remembered the family he left behind in his death. Marinette was his only lighthouse in the vast void of the afterlife
_______
Impotent, despair, and hopeless.
That's how Damian felt every time Marinette had to relive his death. He hated it so much. She didn't deserve that and it broke his heart every damn time.
Why did he have to die? Why did it have to be in such a painful way? Why did she have to feel it on repeat over and over and over again? Was it a twisted way the universe tried to make them reunited? If they can't find each other in life, then they can be together in death? That isn't right!
But it always hurts more when she wakes up and talks to him. Wondering if he was happy and in peace, in wherever place he ended up.
He was there but she didn't know.
He felt sick.
After being revived, Damian felt an immense sense of loss. Sure, he was kinda happy to reunite with his family and grateful for being alive again, but he missed her.
It was difficult to readjust to being alive again, it was crystal clear that Damian Wayne wasn't okay. What hurts him the most was how her name turned into a scar on his wrist.
During the day paranoia settled in making him always on high alert, lashing out when it got too much for him.
In the night, he couldn't sleep properly as a feeling of unease latched onto his every nerve and when he did sleep, nightmares plagued him.
Damian tried to calm down in various ways, but ultimately it was Marinette's voice that soothed him and lulled him to sleep.
It quickly became a habit to replay their one-sided conversations as he tries to fall asleep.
He went over what Marinette Dupain-Cheng spoke to him time and time again as to engrave her voice in his mind. Unfortunately, her voice was fading away, every time he recalled it, he hear his own voice.
At least some memories remained, which was relieving for Damian, even when important ones like what language she spoke or the name of her school were completely wiped out.
He never told his family his experience while he was dead, he guesses Jason was the most likely to know about it but he never brought it up to anyone, so Damian did the same.
Now he was lying in bed, remembering about the time Marinette tried embroidery for the first time.
She started by searching up what she wanted it to be and after much talking, she chose a Robin, Damian smile at the eagerness he felt for her to chose it. It was a fun day, with her making comments here and there about the work, he wishes he could see it.
A knock woke him up of his thoughts, Alfred emerging from the door.
"Master Damian, I'm here to inform you a guest will be joining us for tomorrow's dinner."
"Whose guest?" He didn't really feel like dealing with new people.
"It's Master Jason's guest."
Damian groans, perhaps he could go visit Kent.
"It would be in your best interest to participate, Master Damian." Alfred gave him a look.
He sighed, definitely can't miss tomorrow or he'll have to face Pennyworth.
So, I've written another chapter while listening to a sad song on repeat :') I know it doesn’t really connect to the last chapter but I wasn’t feeling okay and didn’t know how to continue from where I left off.
I hope y’all enjoyed this and have a nice day!
P.S.: The taglist is temporarily closed as some tags aren't working. Again, I'm very sorry if I missed anyone. If you no longer want to be tagged please hit me up.
Taglist:
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236 notes · View notes
pennylanefics · 3 years
Text
Space Heater - Theo Raeken
a/n: this was supposed to be a small fic about playing with theo’s hair, but it turned into more.
*gif is not mine, credits go to the owner*
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•••
“God, it feels so good to shower,” Theo sighs as he walks into your room. You smile and admire his exhausted figure. You found out he was practically homeless after being brought back from the ground, so you invited him to stay with you.
The two of you had never been really close, but you were the one to convince the pack to bring him back, hearing his cries of pain and cries for help. As much as you didn’t think he was a good guy, you could tell he regretted what he did. And the fact that he didn’t ask any of the pack if he could stay with them proved he was back to help and not take advantage.
“Yeah, you look a lot more comfortable.” He chuckles and runs a hand through his hair.
“My hair was getting so greasy and gross, it feels so much better. And I don’t have to rely on cologne anymore.”
“Yeah, I think everyone is thankful for that,” you giggle. Theo smiles and stands in your room awkwardly.
“Oh, uh, I came in to ask if you have an extra pillow? I would use mine but it’s kind of flat.” You nod and stand up, walking with him to the hall closet to give him one.
“If you need anything else, just let me know,” you tell him.
Before you can walk into your room, he grabs your hand gently and gives you a thankful smile.
“I really appreciate you letting me stay here. I know bringing me into your home probably isn’t what you wanted, but I am really grateful you were willing to.” His voice is soft and serious, and in that moment, all of your thoughts and assumptions about him went out the window.
“Of course, Theo. you’re still human, er, well…” you both share a laugh at your slight misstep, but he understands.
“You deserve a roof over your head, a shower, a warm bed, and food. I wasn’t going to keep you from that if I have the room for you.” He starts to respond, but opts to remain quiet.
Instead, he just silently backs into his room and shuts the door. You do the same, hopping into bed after a long day and falling asleep quickly.
Around 2:15 in the morning, you were awoken by wind against the house, then the incoming rain, thunder, and lightning followed. Seeing as you couldn’t get back to sleep after ten minutes, you head downstairs to get a glass of water.
As you were walking through the kitchen threshold, you bump into Theo.
“Oh, sorry,” you gasp, knocking into his chest. He grins and shakes his head.
“Are you alright?” You wonder. He glances down at his water.
“Uh, just came down to get a drink.” You could tell he was lying, and in this moment, you wished you could hear heartbeats. His slightly shaky hands and ragged breathing gave everything away.
“Hang on a moment. Let me get some water for myself and then let’s head upstairs.” He nods and stands there, watching you move around the kitchen swiftly. When your glass is full, you motion for him to follow you upstairs.
He is about to go back into his room, but you catch his wrist and nod your head in the direction of yours. You turn the light on just to make it a little warmer and brighter to contrast the storm outside.
“Come here,” you whisper, crawling into bed. Theo hesitates for a moment, but when a particularly loud gust of wind shakes the house, he is quick to join you, but still keeping his space.
“Did the storm wake you up?” You ask.
“Yeah. Usually I'm not phased by them, but when I was underground, they...they w-were, uh…”
“Hey, it’s okay. You don’t have to continue.” He inhales and exhales deeply.
“What's your favorite letter in the word monday?” You randomly ask. Theo is slightly taken aback by the odd question. He laughs a little, feeling the anxiety fade away a little.
“My favorite letter in the word monday?”
“Yeah. Like my favorite is the ‘y’ because it ends the word and just gives it a nice little ring.” He is silent for a moment, thinking over it probably too much.
“I’d say the ‘o’. It’s not the first, but it is an important letter.” He pauses. “What’s with the weird ass question?”
“I just figured you needed something to take your mind off of things. So why not throw an incredibly random and nonsense question at you.”
“Well thank you. It definitely helped and I thought too much about that question. And now I’m going to be thinking about what my favorite letter in every word is.” You giggle and rest your hand on his bicep.
You both were laying on your sides, facing one another. He stares right at you, his mind racing.
“You know, you’re the last person I expected to help me come back,” he whispers. “I always thought you hated me.”
“I did,” you admit. “But hearing your painful screams and cries for help, I could tell you changed. I had a feeling that you’ve changed as a person.”
“I have. And I can’t thank you enough for convincing everyone to bring me back.” Suddenly, a loud boom of thunder roars in the sky after a bright flash of lightning. The lights in your room flicker then turn off completely.
“Was that the power?” He wonders, sitting up.
“Yeah, I think so,” you sigh. Theo falls onto his back, staring up at the ceiling.
“You know, I’ve always thought you were cute,” he murmurs after a few minutes. “But Stiles warned me to not get close to you.”
You giggle and gaze up at him, admiring his features that were illuminated by the streetlight shining through your window.
“Yeah, he told me the same thing. If I were to ever get close to you, he would disown me as a friend. When I told him that I thought you were cute as well, he flipped.”
“Has he always been so protective of you?”
“Yeah, since we all got involved with the supernatural world. He said he didn’t want to see me go through what Scott went through, that he can’t lose another friend.”
“I never wanted to see you hurt either. You were the only person I truly cared for since we met. And I know you hated me, and I understand that. But now, I want you to know that I’ve always had feelings for you.” A smile slowly appears on your lips and you scoot closer to him.
Theo follows you and goes back to laying on his side, but he cuddles extremely close to you, his face falling into your neck. You are confused and a little bit surprised at his sudden action. To make things more comfortable, you turn into your back and Theo cuddles up beside you.
“You’re like a space heater,” you whisper, throwing the cover around your bodies to trap the heat in. Since the power went out, it was starting to get chillier in the room, so having him close to you was great.
“One good thing about being a chimera. Unlimited body heat.”
He peppers gentle kisses to your skin, making your face heat up at the feel of it. Absentmindedly, your hand behind his back comes up to play with his long hair. You thread your fingers through it, the silky strands falling between your digits.
“Damn, your hair really is soft,” you tell him. He chuckles and lifts his head to kiss your cheek.
“It’s a good thing I washed it then because it was not so soft before.” You giggle and turn on your side again, snuggling into his chest for even more warmth. He takes this hint and wraps his arms around your body.
But since you couldn’t help yourself, you sneak your hand back up to his hair and mess with it lazily. Theo smiles and closes his eyes, content with the current situation.
“Would you like to lay on my chest to play with my hair instead?” He offers. “In a more comfortable position.”
“No, I’m pretty comfortable and much warmer here,” you respond. Theo laughs and shakes his head, readjusting himself just a little to match your position. His arms were still wrapped around your waist, and his face was now buried in your hair.
“So, are you going to be gone in the morning, or are you planning on staying?” You ask him hesitantly. Theo kisses your head a couple times and pulls back a little to look down at you.
“I was hoping I could stay and we could, maybe, get to know each other better? Maybe I could show you that I’m not entirely the worst person.”
“I was hoping you would stay, honestly,” you chuckle. “And no need to show me. It’s the reason I convinced everyone to bring you back.” Theo grins and nods, reaching between you to hold your hands.
“Thank you,” he whispers. “I know I’ve said it a lot, but seriously. It means so much to me.”
“Of course, Theo,” you whisper back, stroking his cheek.
His eyes dart between your eyes and lips, and you take the hint right away. You reach up and kiss him as soft as ever, but he takes it into his own hands to deepen it slightly.
It lasts for a few seconds, longer than you expected, but you didn’t mind. When Theo pulls away, you catch your breath for a moment before kissing him again. You’ve imagined this moment since you first met him, back when he first arrived in Beacon Hills for senior year.
You break the kiss to yawn, exhaustion taking over you.
“Should I go back to my room and let you sleep?” He wonders. You shake your head and before he can get up, you tug his arm to make him stay.
“The power is still out, and I need my space heater,” you shyly say.
“Alright, I guess I can stay,” he jokingly responds. He had no intentions to leave nor did he want to, so he was really hoping you would make him stay. Which you did.
“Is that all you see me as now? A space heater?” He asks. You giggle in response and snuggle into his chest.
“No. You’re a pretty great cuddles as well.”
410 notes · View notes
yoonpobs · 3 years
Text
bad boy good thing vii.
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pairing: jeon jungkook x oc
genre: angst, smut, fluff, miscommunication (we hate her lol), pining
warnings: smut, jungkook is really an asshole, the angst hurts a lot tbh, unhealthy relationships (?)
words: 4, 627
summary: a series of drabbles where you're confused and jungkook's confusing
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Despite being friends with three (well, now four) people on the football team—you didn’t fancy attending football games at all. It was highly unlike the usual scene you were comfortable with. It was loud, rowdy and people didn’t understand the concept of personal space when they’d shove and push others aside just to get a better glimpse of the players on the field.
Yet, you attended every single one of the football games—and you were a familiar enough face that the coach smiles at you when you hover outside the changing rooms; a simple request from the captain himself.
You’re a little shocked at yourself at the fact that you had no idea who Namjoon was prior to his introduction. He was the captain of the current football team, which apparently, throughout your college’s history—brought the most wins ever. And, he was also well-known that lecturers applauded him for his impeccable work-to-life balance.
Somehow, the divulgence of your own thoughts makes you frown. Because perhaps you were truly anti-social. You weren’t even acquainted with common school affairs in spite of being apart of the student council.
Maybe Jungkook was right.
You don’t dwell too much on your thoughts because you’re unable to, not when the door slams open and bodies of college men pour out with large shouts and their padded shoulders—looking very much prepared for their game.
The anxiety settles into the pit of your stomach when you realise you stick out like a sore thumb. The jeans and white top you were wearing was quite a typical outfit to wear to a game, with the addition of ironically—a baseball jacket. But when you were definitely smaller than the footballers; it was hard not to feel out of place.
Especially when they look you over before continuing out to the field. While you attended games before, you were never asked to meet in the changing rooms. Jimin and Taehyung knew well enough not to ask you, and Jungkook … well. You were always his dirty little secret, weren’t you?
And you see Jungkook first, grinning like a madman when another footballer brings him into a headlock and hollers something you assume is their hype-cheer.
It isn’t supposed to feel like this. Things were meant to have been settled, but the tight feeling in your chest when you look at him only reminds you that some things were hard to erase.
Before you can look away, Jungkook spots you—and he pushes the arms of his teammate off ever so slightly before turning to him and muttering a few words before he’s stalking towards you.
Your eyes widen, definitely not expecting him to pay you any mind.
“You’re here?” He furrows his brows.
You clear your throat, and you realise navigating a conversation with him after what’s transpired is much harder than you expected it to be. The fact that he was so casual about it when he left you with a kiss on your forehead makes you even more conflicted.
“I am.” You mumble. “I told you, remember?”
Jungkook blinks as if he remembers something, and his expression hardens ever so slightly before he’s schooling his features.
“Yeah.” He breathes. “I knew that. Just didn’t know you’d be … here.”
Here was probably referring to standing outside the changing rooms, and you can’t help but flush at the declaration.
“Um, yeah. Namjoon—” Before you can finish your sentence, you see the captain heading towards you with a large grin; looking over Jungkook for a brief moment.
“You’re here!” His words are exactly the same as Jungkook’s, but it evokes a different set of emotions in your chest.
You smile as sincerely as you can, which is proven difficult when you can feel Jungkook’s gaze on you.
“I am.” And you repeat the same thing you said to Jungkook. It feels odd, but you push the feelings aside. “Good luck, you.”
You offer a small punch to his shoulder, an awkward attempt at supporting him and you almost apologise but Namjoon smiles even wider.
His hand reaches out to your hair, gently patting it as he looks at you fondly. You don’t think anyone’s ever treated you so … tenderly before, not upfront and after one meeting at least. And you’re definitely flustered.
“Thank you. It means a lot that you’re here.” His dimples are on full show when he looks down at you with a kind gaze.
You clear your throat and look away, hoping the dim lights didn’t amplify the blush on your cheeks.
“Of course. We have that exhibition next to look forward to if all else goes South.” You grin cheekily up at him, words still soft.
You hope that your joke doesn’t rub him the wrong way, and it doesn’t because he snorts in response. All while Jungkook is silent.
“That’s a win itself, isn’t it?” He says smoothly, and your eyes widen at his blatant—or at least you think—flirting.
And before you can splutter a response, Jungkook is nudging Namjoon’s arm with his shoulder, the movement slightly rougher with his shoulder pads in place.
“We gotta go, Cap,” Jungkook says stiffly.
Namjoon doesn’t realise the hostility in his tone, but you do. And you frown ever so slightly, but you cover it up when Namjoon looks over at you with an apologetic expression.
“I’ll see you after the game?” He asks, eyes lighting up.
Your lips tilt upwards and you nod your head.
“Yeah.”
Namjoon jogs off first, not before grabbing his protective gear as Jungkook lingers ever so slightly, stuttering in his feet as you have the vision of his back towards you.
You’re about to head towards the bleachers, a spot that Namjoon purposefully reserved for you with help of his coach; but Jungkook turns around and his face is hesitant.
“Will you …” He swallows as you raise an eyebrow at his uncertainty. “Will you cheer for me?”
The question is odd, especially when you know that he’s aware that you were here for Namjoon. Usually, that would imply that you were rooting for him. But, you’ve never been able to say no to Jungkook. Not even when you want him to feel the same hurt you’ve felt.
“What friends are for, right?” You mumble, eyes darting to the ground for a second until you look back up at him again.
What you don’t say is that friends don’t do the things we did, or that there was no manual to teach you how to navigate the throes of your relationship after everything that’s happened. Nor do you tell Jungkook that you’re always cheering him on, but you can’t do it outwardly. Not tonight. Not for a while, too.
Jungkook’s face falls obscurely, but he forces a tight smile before grabbing his protective gear too.
“I’ll look for you,” Jungkook says.
Then he’s off, with a squeeze to your shoulder that leaves your heart feeling a lot heavier.
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You ended up sitting next to the school photographer, who you now know as Yena. Prior to this, you’ve heard the student reporter club have a few intense individuals apart of them—word you heard from Yoongi, the President himself—and he was already as intimidating as one could get. But there was Yena, who essentially made people cower in fear when they’d make eye contact with her.
“What are you doing here?” Is the first thing she asks when you slide into your seat. Her tone isn’t condescending, neither was it purposely made to make you feel uncomfortable. Rather, she asked it in a rather bored tone—as if there were better things she could be doing.
“Um.” You squeak.
Yena rolls her eyes, “Relax. I’m not going to bite your head off despite my grotesque appearance. Ever heard of a conversation starter?”
You blink.
“You’re very pretty.” You say softly.
Yena narrows her eyes at you for what seems like forever as you clear your throat. Then, she snorts before patting you on the shoulder.
“I didn’t mean objectively ugly, sweetheart.”
The tilt of her lips make your ears flush and you never found yourself downright intimidated by someone, but there was something about her that made you want to listen to her.
“O-Oh.”
She rolls her eyes. “You’re too nice, _____. Has anyone ever told you that?” She emphasises her point with a tilt of her head.
“N-Not really …” You mumble.
She sighs as she kicks her feet on top of the railings in front of her while her eyes follow the line of footballers that pour onto the field, already moving towards a group huddle.
Her camera is already in her hands when she snaps the shot like second nature, before plopping back into her seat.
“Well, you are. People are gonna eat you alive, you know?” She says pointedly.
You fiddle with your fingers before you find the courage to look at her.
“How did you know who I was?” You wonder out loud with furrowed brows.
Yena scoffs before turning to look at you with a blank expression. And it’s the worst part in you that makes you think that you’ve said something wrong.
“You’re kidding, right?” She deadpans. “Girl who made honours three years in a row? First female student council president? Lecturers pet? Curve-setter? The list goes on, really.”
You flush as you turn your head away.
“I didn’t mean …” You mutter.
She waves you off. “You don’t have to sound so guilty about it. You’re smart and you’re capable. Own it.” She shrugs.
You blink up at her with wide eyes, and for the first time; she properly looks at you and your surprised expression.
“Thank you.” You say softly.
When a whistle blows, the game has somehow started and you have half the mind to begin cheering like the rest of the crowd. But the awkward part of you remains rooted in position.
“So.” Yena leans in with a grin on her face. “Who’s the lucky guy?”
It’s … odd. Purely because you’ve never spoken to her before and you’ve briefly heard about her in passing when you communicate with Yoongi on pastoral affairs. And for someone to speak to you so freely and casually, like you’ve been friends for years—feels nice.
And it’s probably also because you didn’t have any girl friends that you could really trust. People on campus were … they were mean and they usually wanted something from you, whether it was to get to one of your friends or get insights on events so they’d get a boost on their reputation.
“Earth to _____?” She drawls.
You snap your head towards her and your ears turn red once again.
“There’s isn’t … any guy.” You confess.
Yena snorts as if she doesn’t believe you.
“Really now?” Her grin approaches a smile when she rests her chin on her palm. “You know not just anyone sits here, right?”
You shrug. “What about you? Who’s the lucky guy?”
She blinks, then leans back before kicking one leg across her other.
“Photographer pros. Or cons. Especially if you consider watching disgusting men sweat and chase after balls is something to be grateful for.” She rolls her eyes.
You laugh when she complains, and it’s likely the first time you’ve relaxed your shoulders around her.
“That does sound kind of gross.”
She nods her head as if to say right, before offering you a cheeky grin.
Then, her eyes zero onto the field, then back to your face—and eventually back to the field before she hops off her seat once again; waving her camera to signal you that she was going to carry out her duties.
You think Yena’s cool. A little intense, and kind of scary—but a nice person nevertheless. Maybe you were a blind optimist that saw the good in everyone, but there was something about her that you really liked. The kind of person you wish you could become.
The cheers get immensely louder, especially when you note that Jungkook’s scored a goal—his beaming expression displayed on the big screen while you hear girls and guys alike cheering his name.
It’s times like this where you’re reminded of how different you were from him. While he received praise and approval from the masses and was born to be loved by them. You were quite the opposite; the cheerer and the supporter but never quite the one receiving it.
His eyes skim the crowd, and you can see from the screen that his brows furrow ever so slightly. But he’s quick to return to his groove, fist-bumping a teammate along the way.
You sigh because even when you weren’t intentionally looking for him it’s like your heart only wants you to see what’s familiar. And funnily enough, the hurt is familiar too.
In the middle of it all, you try your best to smile—and throw in a small whoop on your own, hoping to blend in but be present enough to be heard.
Yena returns only when it’s half-time, her own body covered in sweat while she huffs, slapping a stray strand of hair away from her face.
“God. You’d think they’d slow down after fifteen minutes but nooo. They have to go flex on their fragile masculinities because they think growling and ripping off their shirts is peak alpha male character.” Yena mutters and it’s the first thing you hear from her.
You offer her a sympathetic smile before digging into your bag and pulling out a handkerchief, one that you always carry around.
“Here.” You smile at her toothily.
Yena eyes the fabric sceptically before looking at your face and back to the handkerchief.
“You sure?”
You nod your head, jutting out your hand once more to emphasise your point.
“Ah. I can see why Namjoon nabbed you up.” Yena coos, ruffling your hair as your eyes widen.
“H-How—?”
“How did I know? Well besides the fact that my job is to literally stick with the team and capture moments and make them look pretty—I’m nosey.” Yena shrugs and your face pales. “Oh, and I saw you guys at the changing room too.”
If she saw … that meant—
“Thought you were with the meathead Jeon for a moment.” Yena snorts.
Your eyes dart down to your lap, and Yena picks up on your silence immediately. But unlike the conventional person; despite her curiousity, she respected your privacy more. So she doesn’t, she just offers you a smile and a nudge to your shoulder.
“Don’t worry,” Yena assures, sighing as the voices of the footballers fill your area as they come up for refreshment. “He’s nice.” You weren’t sure who she was referring to so you just nod.
“Yena—pass me a bottle!” A boy calls, and you half expect her to do so, but instead, she delivers him one better—a middle finger.
“Get it your self you dickwad!” Yena calls back.
Your eyes widen when you turn your head to look at her, completely unbothered when the footballer shoots daggers at her nonchalant figure.
“Men. Think you always owe them something.” She scoffs.
You find yourself unconsciously nodding your head, and once again Yena recognises the gesture but doesn’t mention anything.
Instead, she turns towards you and levels you with a wide grin of her own.
“You’re cool. We should hang out.”
The declaration makes your eyes widen even more and you realise how much you’ve fumbled and made yourself look … stiff the entire time you were attempting to converse with Yena. But she seemed to be unbothered, and the thought makes you excited.
“We should?” You parrot with a squeak.
She nods and you’re still finding it hard to process the fact that she’d brought that up out of the blue.
You weren’t bad company. But you were … you.
“You’re like Ms Bona Fide.” Yena tuts. “People these days are either out to please or to receive.”
You furrow your brows.
“And I’m … not?” You say softly.
“You’re present.” Yena shrugs and throws you an easy-going smile.
God. She was so cool.
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Namjoon scores the final goal.
You expect him to call the hangout off because, well, he’d closed the game and he was the captain. It was only normal that he’d want to celebrate.
So when Yena nudges your shoulders while your head is bent and focused on your mobile device, you slowly looked up with furrowed brows to see her cocking her head to the side with a knowing grin on her face.
And you see Namjoon, out of his gear and in a plain t-shirt and sweats while he waves at you.
You can’t help but gape at him.
“I see you’ve surrendered to good company instead of a zoo.” Yena greets Namjoon first with a snort.
Namjoon rolls his eyes, and you gauge that they’re at least well-acquainted. Acquainted enough that Namjoon subtly tries to flick her off, but you catch the gesture as soon as it comes.
“Promises are promises.” Namjoon shrugs as if he wasn’t aware that you were still gaping at him. Mouth open like a fish out of the water.
“Well—be nice, captain.” Yena whistles, throwing her camera into her bag and slinging it over her shoulder before she turns to look at you, a gentle nudge with her shoulder to yours as she levels you with an intentional look in her eyes.
“Don’t start any fights, Yena.” Namjoon gently chides, but his tone is joking.
Yena waves him off, then waves at you one last time, leaning down to whisper something into your ear that has you flushing.
“Tell me how it goes when we hang out.”
And she leaves you with a keen sense of excitement on the prospect of a new friend like her to look forward to hanging out with.
Namjoon looks over at you, and gently reaches for the tote bag you’ve slung over your shoulder as he tugs it off you with a soft pull.
“Let me.” His smile is all teeth and dimpled grins when you reluctantly let him take your bag from you.
“Thank you.” You murmur, eyes attempting to look at him but his gaze is so focused on yours that you find it difficult to make eye contact.
“We’ve got an exhibition to go to, don’t we?”
You nod your head enthusiastically as he chuckles, allowing you to lead the way as you find a little prep in your steps. It was nice. Having a friend like Namjoon.
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“Captain’s not coming?” Yugyeom groans, ruffling his hair with a towel as the rest of the footballers filter out of the changing room.
Jimin snorts in response. “No. He’s got a date.” The emphasis on the word date is obvious in the immature sense, evoking wide eyes as responses.
“He bailed on us for some pussy?!” Yugyeom cries.
Jungkook has to clench his fists by his side when he hears how his teammate casually referred to you as just some pussy. You weren’t just … that.
“Watch your tone,” Jimin growls, and Jungkook’s thankful that Jimin was more of the confrontational type and didn’t allow shit like this to slide easily. Especially when it came to you. “That’s my best friend you’re talking about.”
Yugyeom’s eyes widened before gawking at the blonde boy.
“You mean Namjoon is going on a date with _____?” The rest of the footballers murmur in response, possibly out of confusion. “How did they—doesn’t she not … date?”
Jimin sighs, already ready with a response on the tip of his tongue but Jeonghan, the keeper interjects.
“Wait, I was under the impression that she and Jeon were a thing?”
At the mention of his name tangled with yours, Jungkook, who has been relatively silent throughout, freezes as his hands stop rummaging through his duffel bag while he tries to ignore the inquisitive stares he’s receiving from his teammates.
“W-What?” Jungkook stutters caught off guard.
Yugyeom narrows his eyes at the boy, while Jimin silently observes with an unreadable expression.
“Now that you mention it …” He trails off, head tilting upwards as if he was deep in thought. “I did always see the two of them alone with each other.”
Jungkook clears his throat as he lets out a nervous chuckle, his hand reaching to scratch the back of his neck.
“We’re friends,” Jungkook says stiffly and he hopes it’s believable, despite his hoarse voice. “Friends hang out.”
Jeonghan snorts. “Or she’s a two-timer.”
This time, Jungkook can’t keep his face neutral.
“Talk about her like that one more time and I’ll make sure you never speak again.” He growls to the other boy, whose eyes widen in response.
“I was kidding—” He raises his hands in defense but Jungkook is shoving the remainder of his belongings into his duffel bag before hauling it over his shoulder and storming out of the room, ears burning in both frustration and anger.
“You don’t joke about this type of shit,” Jungkook mutters under his breath right as he leaves the rest of the members brewing with confused expressions as they look at one another with concerned expressions.
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Namjoon, as expected, is a museum enthusiast. That much you could assess when he was excitedly chirping about how much he appreciated all types of art, abstract, modern and contemporary and vintage—you name it and he could likely give you a break down of the nuances behind styles and techniques.
He is also great company. Namjoon is a comfortable line between involved and chivalrous, never pushing farther than what you were able to offer but engaging you in insightful discussions that you found yourself being intrigued by.
While you expected more … forward gestures, Namjoon is respectful and you’re surprised but not really. He was mannered encompassed into human form.
So, when the security guard informs you that the exhibition was over and that the two were the last guests in the hall—the two of you reluctantly had to bring your night to an end.
“That was fun,” Namjoon says once the two of you exit the hall, just two figures in the night who have thousands of words to say about the masterpieces you’ve witnessed.
“Honestly, I was already looking forward to it but seeing the pieces the art students curated in person was just another type of euphoria.” You confess.
Namjoon nods in agreement. “I totally agree. You can just tell that they’ve really dedicated all their free time to the work they’ve displayed.”
“Art is beautiful, isn’t it?” You mumble, eyes looking back to the museum as you grin up at Namjoon who’s already looking at you.
“Yeah.” He breathes, and the way he’s looking at you under the dim moonlight makes you irrevocably flustered. “Beautiful.”
You clear your throat as you shift on your heels, hoping the blush on your cheeks isn’t too apparent. The night was still wondrous, and you feel a type of comfort in Namjoon that you haven’t felt in a very long time. But there’s still a lingering thought in the substandard part of your mind that reminds you of doe-eyes and a bunny smile.
“Thank you for your time, Namjoon.” You say shy, fiddling with your thumbs.
When you find the courage to look at his face, he’s already beaming at you.
“No. Thank you.” He reassures. “I know you’re super busy so for you to find time out of your schedule to hang with a virtual stranger really means a lot to me.”
Your eyes widen, but then your face neutralises as you flush.
“I’m not that busy …” You mumble.
Namjoon chuckles. He doesn’t even snort or offer a sarcastic remark in response. He just acknowledges it with a kind smile and doesn’t comment further.
He’s different from what you’re used to. A challenge. A burst of rebellion that loved to roll remarks off his tongue.
You don’t want to think of him just yet.
“Regardless. You’re here. And I’m grateful.”
You nod your head lamely, clutching your bag into your chest (after relentlessly whining to Namjoon to allow you to hold it yourself when you felt a little useless).
“I should—I should head back.” You cock your thumb towards the direction of your apartment.
Immediately, Namjoon steps forward and is ready to head the same way you are.
“Let me walk you back.”
“I can’t possibly—”
“I’m not asking this time, ______.” He frowns.
You snap your lips shut. Though you did feel a little bad, it was late and the rational part of you knew that it was best if Namjoon walked you home.
“Okay.” You say softly.
Before you can begin walking, he tugs you by the elbow so gently, but firm enough for you to nearly stumble into his chest.
And he’s so tall, so you’re peering up at him with wide eyes as you gauge his nervous expression.
“I-I’m sorry if this is a little forward but—” Namjoon clears his throat. “W-Well I think—I really think you’re nice. And great. Like—good company, you know? So I’d r-really—I’d enjoy—”
You blink at him as he attempts to find his words.
“Namjoon.” You whisper gently, tugging the hem of his shirt.
At your gesture, his mind blanks but he remembers that you’re still looking up at him with a confused gaze.
“Okay. Fuck.” He whines as a giggle escapes your throat when he peers at you with an exasperated expression. “I’m not usually this much of a mess. You just make me nervous.”
“O-Oh.” You breathe, “I do?”
Namjoon sighs, rubbing his hands over his face.
“I don’t know if it was obvious but I’m kind of into you.” He says softly, rubbing his hand over his neck.
You don’t expect it, not at all. So you can only muster gawking at him at his sudden confession.
“And you don’t need to—you don’t need to say anything about it. We can pretend like I didn’t just confess to you. We can just be friends.” He rambles, eyes wide. “I just wanted to let you know … yeah. So I really hope we can still continue to hang out even though you might think I’m a creep and I really didn’t offer to walk you home because I had intentions. Really just wanted to make sure you were safe.”
You continue looking at Namjoon with wide eyes. Because you’ve never been on this end before. The one receiving the confession. You’ve never really given a confession either, and you try to suppress the bitter memories of the confession you tried to give Jungkook that wasn’t verbal but with your presence.
With you giving up certain parts of yourself for him so he could see you.
“Please say something.” Namjoon chuckles nervously.
“I—…” You choke. “I don’t know what to say.”
“We can pretend like I didn’t just say that.” He winces.
You shake your head. “No. No. It’s fine, Namjoon. Really.” You reassure him gently. “I really appreciate it … I just didn’t … expect it.” You finish lamely.
“You’re a very interesting person,” Namjoon tells you, lips twitching in an attempt to lighten the awkward atmosphere.
Interesting? You don’t think you’ve ever heard anyone call you interesting before. Not outright, at least.
“I’m really not.” You say sadly.
Namjoon furrows his brows but doesn’t reach out to you further, his hands still remaining limp by his sides.
“Hey.” His voice calls out. “You are. You’re definitely one of the most interesting people I’ve met in my life.”
You blink.
“T-Thank you.”
He waves you off, gesturing towards where you gestured towards earlier.
“Shall we?”
And somehow, Namjoon has a way of making everything feel easy. Like a temporary space for you to feel safe, to feel wanted.
So why doesn’t your heart flutter?
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545 notes · View notes
voiceless-terror · 3 years
Note
#21 and #46 for kiss prompts, maybe? I can't get enough your writing tbf
kiss on a dare- a little jonmartin season one fluff <3 All in all, this is one of Tim’s better Friday nights.
It’s been ages since Jon’s hung out with them, and never with Martin along for the ride. The Archives had been off to a messy start after the Dog Incident and Jon’s subsequent panic over the state of the place. What used to be an ‘every couple of weeks’ tradition turned into an almost-never one as the newly-assembled team got buried under more and more boxes of dusty statements. He’s pretty astounded that Jon agreed to dinner and drinks- although it’s a Friday night, Jon’s been apt to stay weekends more often than not. He figured if he arranged for it at one of theirs instead of a pub, Jon would be more likely to come. He always preferred less crowded settings.
No, the real feat was getting him to come knowing Martin was invited.
Jon’s been getting...better around him, that’s true. He was perfectly fine at his birthday party, going off about emulsifiers for a solid fifteen minutes. Tim’s always been rather fond of Jon’s infodumping, and if he’s comfortable enough to do it around Martin that must be a good sign. Despite an initial freeze-out, he now thanks Martin for his tea and saves his most pointed comments for Martin’s more egregious screw-ups (and even those have less bite than usual). Still, a colleague does not a friend make, and Jon’s never been good at opening up to people he doesn’t know all that well. However, Jon just nodded at the Martin caveat, seemingly not giving it a second thought. And Martin didn’t seem all that worried either.
Whatever, Tim’s not going to look a gift horse in the mouth. He’s just happy they’re all here, having a good time. It’s late and Jon’s had enough wine to keep a smile on his face. He missed that. It’s nice how easily they slot together, even with all of the upheaval and a new addition. Martin himself isn’t so shy after a drink or two, more willing to engage in banter and keep the conversation going. This is what it should be like all the time, Tim thinks. Shitty archive job or not. 
It’s when they retire to the living room, drinks in hand, that he finally notices the little grin on Sasha’s face. And Tim, knowing exactly what that means, is both a little afraid and excited. Four-drink-Sasha has always been a host unto herself.
“Why don’t,” she begins, a hiccup interrupting her as she slumps into an armchair. Tim snickers and ignores the glare this earns him. “Why don’t we play one of our old games-”
Tim raises a glass in agreement as Jon, predictably, groans. Martin looks quizzically between them. Ah yes, time for your initiation, Marto! Not that they’ve played this in about a year or so, of course, but it's always fun to revisit the good old days.
“Seriously? We’re not children-”
Tim gives Jon a playful slap on the back that sends him flying forward on the couch, spilling a bit of wine on Sasha’s rug. He hopes she doesn’t notice. “C’mon, it’ll be fun, boss! Nothing like it to break the ice, and there’s definitely some ice that needs breaking.”
Martin blinks, hand tightening on his glass. He looks nervous, like he always does when he doesn’t know exactly what’s going on. Which is a shame, because he’s been so nice and open all night. Even chatting with Jon. “Sorry, what are you talking about?”
Jon rolls his eyes, giving Martin a commiserating look. “Truth or dare.”
Martin lets out a disbelieving laugh, relaxing minutely. “Wait, really?”
“Yes, really.” Jon’s foot reaches out to shove at Tim’s leg. “Tim loves pulling ridiculous stunts-”
“-Hey, you loved the karaoke idea-”
“You sing?”
“No.” Tim would dispute that, but the look on Jon’s face declares it a bad idea. “And Sasha likes to ask probing questions.”
Sasha preens, though the remark was certainly not meant as a compliment. “What can I say, I’m the Queen of Truth-”
Tim snorts. “Hacking and blackmail more like-”
“Anyway-” Sasha sings out as Tim dodges a pillow to the face. “Tim….truth or-”
“Dare, always dare.”
“You’re absolutely no fun,” Sasha pouts, though it doesn’t take long for her eyes to narrow in thought. There’s very little Tim won’t do, but that’s a dangerous look. “I dare you...to text…”
“Text? You can do better than that, Sash.”
“Text...Elias.” That’s more like it. 
Jon immediately scowls. “Tim, no-”
“I don’t have his number-”
“I do-”
“Sasha!”
“Jon, it’ll be fine! He’ll just say ‘oops, wrong number’ afterwards, no harm, no foul-”
Tim takes this time to snatch at Sasha’s phone, sitting precariously on the arm of her chair. She doesn’t notice, too busy gesturing at Jon empathically. He scrolls through her contact list.
“And then it’ll come down on me-”
Sasha rolled her eyes. “How is he going to connect it to you? It’s not like he knows we’re all together-”
“Done!” Tim tosses the phone back onto the couch with a little grin. Sasha blinks, looking down in confusion.
“Wait, that’s mine-”
The screech and smack on the arm at Tim’s hastily fired off ‘u up? ;)’ to Elias Bouchard were definitely deserved. He’s sure he’ll face consequences for that in the near future, but Jon and Martin’s immediate laughter had been well worth it. Shouldn’t dish it if you can’t take it, that’s Tim’s motto.
In the next round, Tim manages to get Martin to confess to his poetry-writing habit, an admission that has him turning an attractive shade of red. Jon just giggles quietly to himself as Martin reads through one of his poorer attempts at rhyme saved to the notes of his mobile. Tim watches the two of them; Martin keeps looking up at Jon throughout it all like he’s the only one in the room and god, his crush is so evident and yet Jon is oblivious, smiling at him like he’s not on the receiving end of some of the most loaded glances of all time. 
Martin gets Sasha to admit to her most recent perusal through confidential institute records, which turned out to be previous archival expenses (solely to find out what Elias would cover with their new jobs, of course). At first glance, there wasn’t much in the way of extravagant meals or supplies, but a bit more digging had her finding Gertrude’s extensive travel budget. For an old woman, she certainly was a globe-trotter.
“All I’m saying, Jon, is that we could definitely do with a trip to China-”
“Yes, I’ll be sure to ask Elias about Gertrude’s trip to China, something I certainly shouldn’t know about, and he’ll have to let us go.”
“Refill?” Martin’s on his feet, taking Jon’s wine glass in his hand and Tim watches as their fingers brush- go Martin!- and yet Jon just nods his thanks, completely oblivious to the seduction taking place before him. Tim’s given it some thought and honestly, he thinks they’d make a cute couple. An odd pair, for sure, but Jon’s so soft once you get to know him, and Martin’s one of the funniest, sweetest guys he knows. They could be good for each other.
“Well, I still think it’s worth a try.” Sasha’s eyes are starting to blink heavily - she’ll be out for the count tonight, for sure. “Anyway, it’s your turn. I dare you-”
“I didn’t even pick!” Jon says, though he doesn’t seem too put out by it. This is the Jon Martin should know, the easy-humored, smiling man sprawled out before him. He’s even taken his little sweater vest and tie off, looking more like the familiar friend from research Tim knows so well. It warms his heart.
“Fine. Truth or dare?”
“Dare, I suppose. Seeing as how you already have one queued up.”
“I dare you to...to...to give a little kiss to someone in this room.” She waves her glass around imperiously. “Anyone you like.”
Silence. Tim gives Sasha a warning look that she ignores. She’s well in her cups, and he supposes any sense of propriety has gone out the window along with her sobriety. He’s actually seen Jon give quite a few kisses on a particularly memorable New Years Eve, but that was a different time. He doesn’t want him to feel pressured, not when he’s just starting to open back up.
 “Jon doesn’t have to if he doesn’t want to-”
Sasha rolled her eyes. “Oh come on, you remember-”
“It doesn’t matter- Jon, you can skip this one if you like, we can think of something else-”
“Tim, it’s alright.” Jon puts a hand on his arm to stop the argument, and there’s a strange look in his eyes that can’t be attributed to liquor. It’s mock-serious, almost playful paired with his little sly smile. He thinks for a moment that Jon’s going to lean in and kiss him but instead he gets up from the sofa in a smooth motion and walks across the room to Martin, who’s just turned around with two glasses in hand. He freezes in place as Jon gets on his very tippy toes, takes his face in both hands, and kisses him. 
Jonathan Sims. Kissing Martin Blackwood. Against a kitchen counter. Martin Blackwood, who, once he’s over his surprise, puts the drinks down behind him and kisses right the hell back, arms winding around Jon’s waist like they belong there.
What. The. Fuck.
_____
“The leg bit was a nice touch.”
“Hmm?” Jon’s in Martin’s lap, sprawled out on his couch back at his own flat, eyes closed in contentment as he leans back against the other man’s chest. Martin’s got one hand in his hair, and the other entwined with Jon’s, twirling the black ring on his finger. It’s heavenly.
“Thought you were trying to climb me.”
“Well, you usually pick me up at that point, make it easier.”
“Sorry, next time.” Kissing Jon’s always fun but kissing him out in the open, in front of their friends? Was that something they could do now? “Should we tell them we’ve been dating for two months?” 
Two whole months since that night in Document Storage when Jon had finally let his guard down. When Martin had held him in his arms. Jon was very particular about keeping up appearances, though that all seemed to have crumbled tonight. Sasha rather fashioned herself a matchmaker, and Jon didn’t do anything to dissuade the fact. It’d been nice, having their relationship to themselves, the secret of it, the obliviousness of their friends who still thought Jon only tolerated him. It’s not that he wanted to keep it that way, of course, but it was nice while they were still figuring it out. 
“If you’d like. Maybe it’s time.” Jon tilts his head back, giving Martin a fond look. “Though I know how much you enjoy playing the lovesick fool-”
“There’s something so poetic about unrequited love, yknow?”
“All the more when it’s requited, I’d say.” Martin couldn’t argue with that. He leans down to give Jon’s forehead a peck. 
“Hmm. Give it a few more weeks. Act out the honeymoon phase for a bit, it’ll be fun.”
And when Jon squeezes his hand and smiles back, Martin thinks he won’t need to do much acting at all.
ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/31318724
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yesimwriting · 3 years
Text
The Promise of Rain, blurb 2
The Promise of Rain (part 2?? technically) 
A/n I was not originally planning a second part for this but some people wanted it and this idea came to me and it works better with the context of ‘The Promise of Rain’ but it can technically be read as a stand alone :))
Anyways this might turn into a small series of kinda connected blurbs that are all kind of canon with each other but aren’t necessarily connected except for the reader’s background (the reader is a very sunshine-y person and knows Kaz bc she’s a runaway princess that he was hired to bring back home but she managed to convince him to let her work for him instead)
--
The night air had left me with a chill that made me want nothing more than to have my covers draped over me as I read. I’m normally more sociable after a job, especially after such a simple and safe ending, but a lot of tonight had left me wanting to be alone. 
Well, not truly alone. The company of my books is always welcomed, but tonight I can’t seem to find much comfort within the pages. After almost every paragraph, I find myself distracted by gusts of wind and thoughts of the heavy, silver clouds that seem to make up tonight. A part of me longs for the rain. I know it’s ridiculous to expect rain each time I desire some sense of comfort, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want it. Especially when the sky so clearly implies it. 
“This must be the fifth time I’ve come here and you’ve been reading.” Kaz’s sudden appearance is almost enough to shake away my lingering somberness. 
I roll my eyes slightly, turning my attention back to the page in front of me. “That observation is just a testament to how often you come in here.” 
His glare is half hearted, a look I’d find endearing if I was less annoyed. “Where else am I going to find a reminder that good people exist in Ketterdam?” 
I think he may have a sixth sense that warns him when I’m treading the line between being annoyed and displeased. Everytime I find myself mad at him in a way that makes me want to avoid him instead of yell at him, Kaz makes some ridiculously heart-melting comment. He steps further into the room. I don’t miss the way he eyes my stretched out legs. Ever since the conversation we had after he woke up after an injury, we’ve fallen into the unmentioned habit of silently inviting the other to stay by moving to make room for them. 
It had started the day after the conversation in which Kaz had admitted that he wanted me to stay with him. He had been sitting on the small couch while discussing the details of a job. Shortly after I walked in he made a point of shifting so that he was clearly on one side of the couch. I didn’t think much about sitting down, but Inej and Jesper exchanged a look. 
Now, though, I keep my legs stretched out on the bed. He eyes my position on the bed, something grim crossing his features. 
“It might rain tonight.” 
He knows me so damn well. I hate it. “I hope so.”
I turn my head, analyzing the way the world seems to be on the cusp of something. I stare at the silver clouds until I feel something hard tap my leg. The tap is firm but not painful. I’m quick to look at Kaz as he lowers his cane. The mention of rain had been a distraction. 
“You distracted me on purpose.” 
“The first rule of the Barrel is to always be prepared.” There’s a slight uptilt to his lips, something I’ve learned to interpret as a sign of teasing. 
How is he so easy to be around one second and so cold the next? I resist a smile. “I’ll take notes.” 
Kaz ignores my passive aggressive tone. His focus seems to be on my legs that have still not moved to offer him a place next to me. “You wear your emotions too openly.” Great, he’s going to make us talk about it. “What reason could you possibly have to be mad at me?”
“I’m not mad at you.” It’s a partial truth. 
His expression harshens. “Don’t lie.” 
“I’m not thrilled with you, but I don’t think that’s the same as being mad.” 
Kaz lets out a partial sigh. “No, they’re not the same.” Such an early concession feels like a trap. “With you, the first option is worse.” I don’t have anything to say to that. “Is this because of what I said to Jesper?” 
My posture straightens on instinct. “He wants your validation more than he’d ever admit and I understand that expressing praise isn’t exactly something you do, but would it kill you to not actively insult him?” 
“I didn’t say anything that was wrong. He thinks he’s a gambler but he’s just someone born for losses.” The look I give him must mean something to him, because Kaz is quick to tact on, “That doesn’t make him less valuable of an asset or less relatively dependable.” 
I eye him cautiously, the slightest bit of vulnerability playing at his features. “Don’t look at me like that--and don’t tell me that. Jesper’s the one who could use the occasional reminder from you that you hold him to any regard with positive connotations.” His lips press together like he’s thinking about scolding me for scolding him. “It’s only because I know you care more about Jesper than you’d ever let on.” 
“Jesper’s esteem can handle the blow.” The curtness of his voice is a blow in its own sense. “And he didn’t exactly deserve to be in my good graces after what he did tonight.” 
My sigh is not weighted enough to match Kaz’s newfound fountain of emotion. “We were successful--”
“He left you.” I didn’t know Kaz’s voice was capable of such harshness. “I paired him with you, and he left you--and you almost didn’t make it.” I let the weight of his words take up all the available space in the room, keeping the silence that follows them until some of the heaviness has dissipated. “He could have cost me one of my best people.”
Oh. His harshness, his unwarranted coldness, had been a manifestation of his concern. For me. Guilt knots my stomach. Potential words that may offer Kaz some sort of support raise and die back down in my throat. Kaz turns towards the door. 
“Kaz.” He pauses. There’s a long moment in which I think he won’t turn around, but finally, he does. I tuck my legs beneath me, forcing myself to sit up a little straighter. “I told Jesper to leave because I knew the job would have failed if he had been trapped in that room with me.” I drop my gaze towards the window. “I was right, the job was successful, and I got out in time so it was worth it.”
“You risked your safety?” The harsh facet of his being is making its return in full force. 
“For the job,” I’m careful to keep my words factual, “It’s what we’re supposed to do.”
Kaz’s jaw locks. “When I said that keeping you near me would ruin you this is what I meant.” 
Is it really this big of a deal? I made it out. “Kaz.”
“This wasn’t my best idea.” His words are leached of anything. “You’re going back home. Tomorrow I’ll arrange the voyage myse--” 
“Kaz Brekker you may get to live your life doing anything you want but you don’t get to control mine.” My chin raises an inch, an instinctual act of subtle rebellion. “I am not going back there, even if I’m technically indebted to you because you didn’t return me to my father but that does not mean I’ll--”
“I’m not trying to control you.” His words are sharp, boarding on a yell. “A job like that one wasn’t worth you.” 
From Kaz, I know those words are heavy. There’s a lot of things I could say to that. I could tell him that I wanted to do something for him. I could say that I appreciate him telling me that. I could even say that in his own way, Kaz giving Jesper a hard time because he left me, is kind of cute in a misguided way. The thing is I think all of these responses will make things worse. 
“Kaz,” I keep my voice as steady as possible, “I’m fine, you’re fine, it all worked out.” Scratching the back of my arm, I exhale gently. “I’ll be more careful next time, I promise.” 
I watch him carefully, there’s a slight slump to his shoulders as he exhales. Is the fight leaving him so easily? He walks further into the room. “You better.” He sits down in the space I provided for him slowly. “If you’re not you’ll have worse things to worry about than anything that can happen to you on a job.” He moves his cane forward easily, tapping my knee in a swift motion. 
I roll my eyes at the mock threat. “They do say that there’s nothing to fear in the Barrel like the Dirtyhands.” 
“Remember that.” Any edge in his voice is forced. I fight against a smile that seems to always want to break across my face whenever I think I see something resembling lightness in Kaz. 
“I don’t think I could forget anything about you.” 
He turns his head slightly. “You should.” 
“Too bad.” 
Kaz leans his back against the wall, untensing slightly. “I think you just like disagreeing with me.” 
There’s no point in lying about it. “Only because when you argue with me you give me this really particular look.” 
“A look?” 
Adding insult to injury, I smile. “Sometimes you look like you’re too focused on being angry, like you’re compensating for something.” 
Kaz lets out a bitter sigh. “Maybe if you were less of a puppy I wouldn’t have to--”
The laugh that escapes is most definitely a mistake. “Did you just call me a puppy?” I don’t give him a chance to reply, laughter taking over again. “I mean this in the least argumentative way possible--but you’re so weird sometimes.” 
He rolls his eyes, tensing. “I’m leaving.”
I stifle the rest of my laughter. “No. I was--I was kidding!” I keep my eyes on Kaz, expecting some type of annoyed glare, but his expression is a lot more weighted than that. Odd. “Kaz?” 
“You need to be more careful.” I understand Kaz’s pause as something he does before saying something outside of his nature. “I’m not asking you this as a Crow or a Dreg.” 
On instinct, my posture straightens. “I promised and I meant it.” 
“Sometimes I wish I could believe in Saints,” his voice has taken off a distant quality, almost fragile, “That way I could believe something existed to help what matters.” 
Oh. “You never fail, even if I didn’t believe in Saints I’d believe in you.” 
“You’re wasting your faith.” The sound of lightning cracking is almost enough to make me jump. The rain finally came. 
I know I’ll never convince him that that’s not true. “I don’t think so, but that’s why it’s called faith.” 
“I have faith in some things.” His expression is far off. 
“Like what?” 
Kaz’s eyes find the window. “People that find meaning in the rain.” 
Something in my chest swells. “You’re like the rain.”
We sit there in silence, watching raindrops glide down the window. “What were you reading?” 
The question has me dropping my gaze to the forgotten book on my lap. “I stole this book from the palace before I left. It was my mom’s favorite, she’s read it so much the spine’s completely cracked and the cover is practically falling off.” 
“Hm…” He mumbles. “Read some, the books read in a palace must be worthwhile.” 
A part of me wants to tell him that elitism has no place in literature, but his request leaves me frozen. I nod once, turning to the first page of the book. “It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife--” 
“Your upbringing makes sense--” 
“You can’t judge it off the first sentence,” he’s insufferable, “It’s setting up irony, and if you’re going to complain--” 
He lets out a conceding sigh. “I’m listening, I’m not interrupting.” 
I keep my eyes on him for a second longer than I should. “Okay.” Dropping my gaze back to the book, I adjust my grip on the worn paperback, “Good.” 
And then I keep reading. 
--
@theincredibledeadlyviper @grishaverse7 @lonelystarship @mentally-in-northern-italy @uhanddreag 
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awesomerextyphoon · 3 years
Text
Speculum Cupido
Summary: You’ve been Dr. Strange’s apprentice for some time now and you wanted to prove your best friend wrong. It goes awry and both of you find yourselves in a ‘dark mirror’ universe where the Captain, the Asset, the Kraken, and the Fallen Angel want to make both of you theirs.
Pairing: Dark!Steve x Female Reader x Dark!Ransom, minor Dark!Bucky x OFC x Dark!Sam
Rating: 18+ / Explicit
Word Count: 3,072
Warning: Dub/Non-Con Smut, Oral (m & f receiving), Daddy Kink, MMF Threesome, Double Penetration, Spit Roasting, Non-Con Drugging, Breeding Kink, and Artistic License w/Biology
A/N: This is my gift to @labella420​ for @drabblewithfrannybarnes​, @chrissquares​ , and @amythedvdhoarder​’s Happy Hoelentine’s Day Challenge.  Dividers are by the lovely @firefly-graphics​. Shout out to @saiyanprincessswanie​ for letting me borrow an idea of hers for this fic. Thanks to @the-soulofdevil​ for the beta.
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Another Valentine’s Day, another day for the world to mock me being single.
You were having enough of a ‘meh’ week as it is. Dr. Strange had to return to Kamar-Taj for an in-person meeting and Wong was who knows where. They had instructed you to work on your portal and transfiguration spells while they were away which was fair since you’ve been lacking in that department.
It’s just that you longed for some excitement.
Luckily you wouldn’t be spending Valentine’s completely alone; Isabeau, your best friend, was coming over due to as she put it, ‘no one cares about a day where all one gets is somewhat good sex’.
Fast Forward two hours and you’re getting your room ready for Galentine’s Day Movie Night. You had decked out your room with homemade baked goods, drinks, best friend movies, all the good shit.
“I have wonderful news!” Isabeau burst in with gusto yet again.
You shot her a bemused smile, “What is it this time?”
“I have a new crush! It’s Eric from IT!”
“Are you sure this won’t end up like last time?” you queried in reference to the time when Isabeau’s crush turned out to be a complete asshole.
“Oh hush! This won’t be like that at all,” Isabeau retorted, “Now how about you? Have you had any luck with a hot sorcerer?”
“If only I’d be so lucky,” you muttered as Isabeau started on the Toffee Crunch Cookies you made.
A few minutes later, Isabeau’s eyes narrowed and her full lips curved upward in a mischievous smirk.
She had one of her ideas again.
“Hey, why don’t you try an ambiance spell. They’re harmless and you always feel better afterward.”
You didn’t like casting them due to something always going awry, but you relented once Isabeau broke out her puppy dog eyes.
“Alright, alright, I give,” you submitted, “I’ll try a simple floating star spell. Let me find the book.”
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 Both of you went to the library for the book but it was nowhere to be found. All of the ambiance and illusion books were blank.
“Is this a sorcerer thing? I’m not seeing any words or illustrations,” puzzled Isabeau as you went through book after book in the library only to find them blank.
“No. Maybe we should just go back to my room,” you suggested as you made your way to the exit.
“Wait! There’s one book left. You could try that one.” Isabeau pointed to the last book on the shelf. It was a little worn like many of the books that resided in the library, but the inscriptions seemed odd; like it wasn’t supposed to be there.
Yet it was the only book that had anything in it.
“Fine,” you relented as you took the book back to your room.
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  The spells in the book weren’t anything out of the ordinary, but one spell seemed to stand out to both of you.
“Speculum Mundus?” Isabeau wondered.
“It means Mirror World in Latin.”
“Oh,” her eyes got a mischievous glint to them again, “I bet you can’t cast the spell.”
“Not this again.”
“Oh come on,” Isabeau goaded, “It’s a simple mirror world spell. You’ve done it before. What’s the worse that can happen?”
“I don’t know…”
“Are you gonna chicken out again?”
“No! Just give me a minute,” you mumbled as your hands got into the starting position and recited the incantation.
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  The room changed instantly.
It was filled with prism-like structures and kaleidoscope imagery giving the space a surreal ambiance.
It wasn’t unlike the last time you went into the Quantum Realm with Dr. Strange and Wong, and yet the hair on the back of your neck stood straight, and a chill shot through your spine.
You heard a gasp and turned around to see Isabeau with her protruding eyes opened wide and her mouth gaping. Following her line of sight, you saw four of the hottest men you’ve ever seen.
Though something was amiss.
For one thing, there were two Steve Rogers; one with a beard and one clean-shaven. Bucky Barnes’ arm was silver and not dark gray with gold highlights. All of them were in black uniforms with sections of vermillion and/or maroon. Clean-shaven Steve had a black tactical suit with a vermillion Kraken on his chest. Bearded Steve had a skull with tentacles on it. Sam had three vermillion stripes and one maroon stripe across his chest and shoulders with a falcon’s head in red surrounded by a black circle between his pecs.
But the thing that set off all your alarms was the fact that Bucky’s outfit was a dead ringer of his Winter Soldier days.
Instinctively, you grabbed Isabeau’s hand and made a mad dash for the hallway. You needed to get some distance so you could ground yourself.
You tried breaking the spell but to no avail. Not only did the spell not break, but your hands also burned at each attempt.
“We won’t lose you again!” one of the Steves yelled as you and Isabeau turned a corner.
“Come here, mici prințese!” another voice, probably Bucky’s shouted as the two of you made your way into a closet.
“I think we’re okay for now,” you breathed telepathically as the four Adonises crept past your hiding place.
“What’s the plan now?” Isabeau asked fearfully as her heartbeat started to rise in terror.
“I don’t know but-” you were cut off by a strike to the back of your head and your vision rapidly fading to black.
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  Muffled voices and the beeping of medical equipment brought you from the void.
“Nothing is wrong….they’re…good, sir.”
“Be sure that they are. We can’t leave anything up to chance.”
Groggily, you open your eyes to find yourself in a sleek hospital room lightly chained to a bed. Several other people were monitoring your vitals. One of them is Dr. Bruce Banner, or what seems to be Dr. Banner.
Bruce turned to see you looking around with a slightly confused expression, “Ah, you’re awake,” he turned to one of his aides, “Contact the Captain and Lieutenant. Tell them to come to get their bride.”
You blinked. Bride?
“Where is Isabeau, my friend?” you inquired as one of the aides brought you some water.
Bruce scowled, “Don’t think about her. You might be able to see her if the Captain and/or Lieutenant wills it.” he remarked while eyeing you up and down in a condescending almost lecherous manner, “Hmm, looks great for breeding,” Bruce noted as he fondled and prodded your curves.
You’ve always been proud of how you looked, but at that moment you wanted to shrink in the corner after giving this Bruce a roundhouse kick to the groin.
You were about to tell Dark!Bruce to fuck off when Tony Stark, fuck it, Dark!Tony entered the room. This Tony looked a lot more sinister with his silver, gray, light, and steel navy blue armor. His face and hair were mostly uncovered with his facial expression positively predatory.
“Cap’s one lucky bastard. He gets a sexy bunny along with Lieutenant Smart Ass.”
Recalling how some megalomaniacs liked shows of submissiveness, you lowered your head and asked where you were.
Whether it be out of pity, spite, or malice, Tony answered your question, “You’re in another earth, another universe.”
You nearly swiveled to look outside the window. NYC’s skyline was radically different. There were fewer buildings and HYDRA insignias everywhere.
“HYDRA took over this world.” You deadpanned. FUUUUCK!
“Sexy and smart.” Tony praised sardonically.
It didn’t take time for HYDRA to regroup after WWII. Zola and his associates were able to convince Howard Stark to give them the Tesseract with the promise of great renown, riches, and no longer being bound by the laws of weaker men. They were able to create a superweapon with the help of Dr. Whitney Frost and have been ruling the planet ever since.
It could be worse. HYDRA knew they had to offer the people comforts in exchange for their obedience. They eradicated all diseases, created a good standard of living, and ended all petty conflicts under the new world order.
Though Tony didn’t feel the need to tell you. You’ll figure it out on your own.
The doors opened to reveal Steve Rogers and his younger, clean-shaven counterpart in all their masculine glory.
“Good, you’re here.” Bruce welcomed smirking at your silent pleas.
Both soldiers walked over and inspected you.
“Hello, kitten. Name’s Ransom.” The clean-shaven soldier drawled as he moaned from your scent, “Nice set of lips you’ve got there.”
“We’ll definitely have some fun with her,” Steve noted as licked his lips ogling your curves.
You had to use all of your restraint not to spit in their faces.
“We’ll take her.” Ransom decided while Steve nodded.
Several of the aides breathed a sigh of relief as Steve broke the chains on your bed like they were nothing.
“Don’t have too much fun now!” Tony called as Steve picked you up bridal style.
“Who am I kidding? they’ll breed her like a Catholic rabbit!”
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  “Um, where are you taking me?” you queried, your voice barely above a whisper.
“You will address us as ‘Sir’ in public unless instructed otherwise. Is that understood?” It took all that Steve had not to push against the wall and pound your pussy with his cock he was so enraged.
No, he needed to wait. No one was to see what’s theirs.
Ransom, for his part, chuckled and shook his head, “Best not to anger this one, kitten. He hasn’t been in the best of moods.”
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  You gasped once the doors to their living quarters opened.
The place was huge!
It had a modern yet retro design; it should’ve been confusing, but it worked. Grand windows showcased the skyline with a balcony in the middle with a huge kitchen next to what looked to be a restaurant-style fridge and a huge living room with a TV and a fireplace.
Yet there seemed to be something missing.
“Place needs a woman’s touch,” Ransom commented sending a smirk your way.
“I’ll see you in the guest quarters Ransom” Steve deadpanned as he led you down a hall.
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  The bedroom was enormous yet sparse like they didn’t know what to do with it.
You were about to say something when Steve dropped you onto the incredibly soft mattress. His eyes darkened with lust and you knew what he wanted. You couldn’t think of a way out of this, not with the magic inhibitors Bruce placed on your wrists.
Maybe you could give escape one last try; you just had to wait for the right opening.
Steve smirked upon seeing you removing your clothes. He liked that you knew your place, his pretty little princess.
You could only gasp when Steve removed his uniform top. He had an incredibly defined musculature: broad shoulders, beefy biceps, chiseled pecs and abs, and a seriously drool-worthy Adonis Belt. The light shining behind him made his body appear even more glorious.
Steve looked like an ancient god brought to modern times.
With a predatory smirk, Steve slowly crawled to you loving the smell of your arousal. “Let me lay out a few rules, sweetheart. You will make our meals, clean our rooms, bear our children, and be our good little whore. You must earn the right to wear a bra; panties are out of the question.”
Each rule was emphasized by a kiss or a love bite to your jaw, neck, collarbone, and shoulders.
Finally, you are to address us as Sir in public and Daddy in private. Say it.”
“Yes, Daddy,” you muttered with your eyes downcast.
Steve lifted your chin up with his forefinger, “That’s a good girl,” and brought you in for a kiss on the lips.
The kiss was demanding yet soft. You were surprised he was capable of such gentleness.
Steve was about to push his tongue into his mouth when Ransom strolled into the room.
“Does she know the drill?”
Steve broke the kiss with a smirk,” Just finished explaining it.”
Ransom shot you a sardonic smirk, “You got the rules, kitten? Good. Now if you misbehave, I’m gonna send you to the dungeons for a few days.”
Steve started up again, “But...if you’re good-”
“A good little wifey,” Ransom interjected caressing your right cheek and leaning in for a kiss.
This kiss started off soft then intensified (really know how to lure a girl) into one filled with passion and dominance. Ransom forced his tongue into and moaned at your taste. A few seconds later he was pushing what felt like a small tablet past your tongue forcing you to swallow.
“Did you do it yet?”
“Cool it, grandpa! I did, don’t you worry. She’s gonna feel it. Aren’t ya, kitten.”
You started to feel strange. Your body temperature skyrocketed, your mind was in a deep haze, your thighs were clenching on overtime you were so turned on. You needed relief and fast.
“Please Daddies!” you begged as you tried your best not to touch yourself.
“See grandpa? She’s ready.” Ransom purred as he grabbed your thighs and placed them over his shoulders. He planted a few kisses near your entrance and groaned at the smell of your arousal.
It only took one long, slow lick to your slit to turn you into a moaning mess. You couldn’t believe the pleasure you were feeling. It was like a bolt of lightning shot through you.
Ransom groaned at the taste of your juices. Not even Stark’s overpriced chefs could compare. “Fuck, she tastes divine,” he groaned and dove in for more. Ransom attacked your folds and swollen clit with insane intensity and precision alternating between his tongue and fingers.
You were on cloud nine. Each motion took you further to the precipice of an orgasm. Ransom kept bringing you back from the edge only thrust you back into his level of tumultuous.
Steve got in on the action by covering your moans with a kiss of all-consuming passion and started playing with your breasts.
“Fuck, these tits are amazing! Can’t wait until these are filled with milk” Steve purred as he took one of your nipples into his mouth and the other between his big and forefingers.
After twenty minutes of teasing, Ransom finally let you come. A volcanic eruption of ecstasy erupted from your core and Ransom lapped up all of your juices.
“Rogers, you’re in for a treat!” Ransom exclaimed as he hopped off the edge of the mattress.
“I get her pussy first since you got to eat her out,” Steve uttered as grinned at your blissed-out state.
With a tsk, both of them got you into position with Steve’s thick, muscular thighs on either side of your hips and Ransom standing in front of you taking off his pants.
He was huge! His cock was long, thick, and veiny. It wobbled against his masterfully sculpted abs with each step he took. You wondered how that was going to fit in your mouth. Turns out Steve’s was no smaller if his tip being coated with your slick is any indication.
“This won’t hurt, kitten. You were made for us.” Ransom cooed.
You didn’t know how right he was.
Steve made his move by pushing into you inch by delicious inch and moaned at the sensation. “Fuck, she fits like a dream.”
“Don’t take forever, grandpa.” Ransom chided.
“Shut up, ya punk!” Steve retorted as he began thrusting into you loving the way your pussy clenched around him like a vice’s grip.
“Open wide, kitten,” Ransom started to push his throbbing cock into your mouth.
It took a bit of time and effort to loosen your jaw enough for him to fully enter you. He started fucking your mouth before you were ready. You tried not to gag he was so rough.
What happened to the man from earlier?
“Fuckin’ perfect.” Ransom breathed as he was approaching his climax.
Steve came with a primal roar that reverberated throughout the room after making you come two more times.
“Swallow it, kitten” Ransom ordered.
Funny thing is, you didn’t need the order. You delighted in the salty, tangy, and slightly sweet flavor.
Two minutes after you swallowed all of Ransom’s spent, both men decided it was time to move. Ransom got onto the mattress and pulled you on top of him with his tip nudging your entrance. Steve got behind you and placed kisses along the juncture between your neck and shoulders while positioning himself at your ass.
“Please...please don’t do this!” you pleaded, the pill’s effect slipping for the tiniest of moments.
Steve grabbed your neck with just enough force to pause, not hurt.” Best be a good girl now, sweetheart,” he warned.
Ransom slid in first, “Holy fucking shit!” he moaned, “Sam owes me $40.
“That depends on how well their bride is taking to them,” Steve pointed out.
“Eh, we’ll say ours is better.”
Ransom moaned again once he bottomed out and grabbed the globes of your blessed backside. He couldn’t wait to grab and smack it around in their quarters.
Steve moved slowly causing both of your breathing to hitch, his from pleasure and yours from slight pain.
With a grin and smirk, they started moving in tandem. Your body almost couldn’t take the immense pleasure you were feeling.
“I could get used to this,” Ransom remarked.
“Well, we have the week,” Steve breathed past your ear.
Both kept at it until they came in you twice. You nearly passed out after your twelfth orgasm.
“Rest kitten,” Ransom purred as you finally gave in to your exhaustion.
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  “The bride took to our seed,” Steve reported to Director Pierce.
“Good. We found their parents along with the rest of the resistance.” Pierce imparted.
Steve scowled at the information.
You and your friend, Isabeau, were the only ones to survive the Eve Project. HYDRA wanted to genetically groom compatible brides for their top soldiers. You were promised to Steve and Ransom and your friend to Bucky and Sam. Both of you were whisked away to another Earth by the resistance and your treacherous parents.
Now you were back where you belong.
“When do we leave?” Ransom growled.
“Once Strange and Wanda crack the protection spell. In the meantime, enjoy your bride.” Pierce turned to leave, but stopped before turning off the screen,” I want to see some little ones soon.”
769 notes · View notes
floralseokjin · 4 years
Text
⤑ made-up love song iii.
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Your first encounter with Kim Seokjin doesn’t go so well, nor your second, or your third… and maybe that’s because it shouldn’t work on paper. You’re an elementary school teacher, never left the country despite hitting the third decade of your life not so long ago, and you’re unable to remember the last time you dated. He’s the dad of one of your students, nearly a decade older than you and divorced. Oh yes, and just another minor detail – he’s a multimillionaire. 
Your lives are lightyears apart, yet somehow, your paths having now crossed, things just seem to fall into place…
pairing; kim seokjin x reader  au/genre/warnings; strangers to lovers, romance, eventual smut, eventual angst, single dad! seokjin, ceo! seokjin, elementary school teacher! oc, age gap (oc is 30, seokjin is 37), seokjin is a dilf, lots of lasagne talk, flirting, kissing, fluff 🥰 words; 9,340
↪︎ chapter index
chapters; i • ii • iii • iv • v • vi • vii • viii • ix • x • epilogue (+ drabbles)
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After you had time to calm down, of course you ended up telling Soojung about what happened on the date. You kept some things to yourself, mainly about how giddy you had felt throughout the whole thing, but you were sure she could see that for herself – she kept looking at you knowingly, and for once she kept the teasing down to a minimum. You ended up staying awake quite late, Soojung opening a bottle of wine. You were still excited from the date and the thought of what was to come next, but somewhere along the line, you and your best friend started getting into your feelings. (Was it really a Saturday night until you and Soojung ended it with slightly drunk sappy heart to hearts and hugs? Obviously not…) 
For the first time in a while you felt comfortable enough to open up about your love life (or lack of one) and felt it easy to talk about the past and to even bring up Donghae. He was a forbidden topic for the most part, no matter how much you were over him, but tonight had changed something. You didn’t know how to explain it, and no, it wasn’t because Seokjin was somehow the man of your dreams who had magically made things better with just one date. That was dumb and only happened in cliché Hallmark movies. 
No, it was because tonight had shown you that life goes on. No matter what rock bottom you hit, or how long it took you to get over it, no hurt was forever. You’d been single for a long time, and happy at that – after you’d gotten over the heartbreak of Donghae cheating on you – but tonight you’d had fun. You’d enjoyed yourself, enjoyed Seokjin’s company. You didn’t know what would come of your second date, or if there would be a third, but you were okay with that. You were just living in the moment, and right now you really liked that infuriating-not-so-infuriating bastard. 
You were taking a chance, just like he was, and it was actually pretty exciting…
.
.
You woke up late the next morning, something you didn’t reprimand yourself for because it was summer break after all, but also, you had a raging wine headache that had needed all the shut eye it could get. Your head was still throbbing slightly as you reached for your phone on the bedside table but seeing a text from Seokjin waiting for you made it miraculously disappear. 
Seokjin (10:28am) Hi Y/N, Thank you for such a great time last night. I can’t wait until Saturday. Would it be alright with you if I kept in touch throughout the week?  Seokjin
You giggled to yourself at his insane formalities. Why was that so adorable? But most importantly how could he be both cute and sexy at the same time? He was hellbent on making you lose your mind. You thought about teasing him, asking him when he’d grown comfortable enough to drop the Regards from yesterday, but despite how well last night had gone, and despite how much you loved joking around with him in person, over the phone seemed different. You were still a little nervous – giddy nervous, but nervous, nevertheless. Your conversation from last night with Soojung came back to you, reminding you that this was all too real. You were potentially catching feelings for this man, and it was new, and exciting, but equal parts terrifying now that you’d woken up with a hangover. 
Everything you typed out in reply seemed way too stiff, so growing frustrated, you settled on an emoji to cut through the formalities. 
You (10:49am) I had such a lovely time too, Seokjin. Of course it’s fine to keep in touch. I’m looking forward to Saturday night! 😊
What did he mean exactly about keeping in touch?, you wondered as you got out of bed, padding your way down the stairs and into the kitchen for a much needed glass of ice cold water. A good morning text? A how are you? You knew he was busy with work all week, so you weren’t expecting too much, but just knowing he wanted to stay in contact until next Saturday made you smile to yourself as you waited for his response. 
You didn’t have to wait long. 
Seokjin (10:55am) Great! I’m so excited to try your World famous Italian lasagne 😁
Cute. He’d followed your lead, ditching the last of the formalities and even signing off with an emoji instead. You instantly felt more at ease, but – 
Oh no. 
Why did he have to bring that up and remind you of your humiliating blunder? You knew what would be taking up all of your time for the few days – you needed to perfect this goddamn dish. 
Soojung on the other hand was unbothered by your predicament. Mind in the gutter as always. “Do you think that’s a euphemism for something else?” She asked straight away once you’d shown her your messages a few hours later. 
“Soojung!” You exclaimed, feeling yourself get a little hot in the face. You wish she’d stop bringing up sex, it was stressing you out. You told her as much. 
“You’re the one who’s invited him to your house for a second date.” 
You stared at her, greatly unimpressed. “You know why I invited him here.” 
You’d told her last night. You’d been hit with a surge of confidence when you’d suggested it was your turn to decide on something. In truth though, you didn’t know the first thing about restaurants, you hardly ever ate out, and when you did it was either fast food or at the food court in the department store Soojung worked at. You knew he wouldn’t have minded any choice you’d made, but that didn’t stop the slight apprehension you felt. 
It was normal, given your difference in lifestyles, and whilst that seemed to be no issue thankfully, that difference was still there. However really, that’s why you’d chosen to cook for him. Seokjin had shown you something close to him last night – the restaurant he owned with his brother, and now you were to show him something close to your heart. Something that was you. You loved cooking and baking in your spare time and you wanted to share that with him however small. Granted it was things you were confident with, but lasagne couldn’t be that hard, right? A true perfectionist, you’d master it quickly enough…
Soojung rolled her eyes. “I’m sure you could suggest McDonald’s and Dilf would be insanely happy.” She nudged you, squealing like a kid. “He’s just so into you!”
You wouldn’t bite. She was making you nervous again. “Stop calling him Dilf, he has a name.”
“Geez, sorry.” She held up her hands in apology. “Didn’t mean to offend your man.” 
You pushed her shoulder, silently telling her to quit it.
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For the next few days it became your life’s goal to master the art of lasagne. Sunday night was spent googling recipes, trying to find the most authentic one. There seemed to be a lot of fuss on the right type of pasta. Flat edged would be fine, but the wavy edge was best. You made note of that. Next was the sauce. Two types. The tomato based one and then the white one – which you learned was called Bechamel. That seemed pretty easy to cook up, but the former seemed a little daunting. Every time you’d had pasta sauce in the past it had been premade, starting from scratch was giving you anxiety. Seokjin thought this was your expertise so you had to make it believable. What if you made it too salty? Too bland?
…Possibly you were thinking way too hard about this. Soojung thought the same. 
“Just buy it in a jar, Y/N, for Christ’s sake. You’re taking this way too seriously. You don’t need to learn fluent Italian to make your little white lie believable. It’s a goddamn lasagne.” 
She had a point. 
“He’d be happy with a sandwich. He’s coming over for you, not the shitty lasagne.” 
“Don’t call my non-existent lasagne shitty, you’re setting me up for failure.” You grumbled, looking at the ten tabs you had up on your laptop screen, all claiming to be the best most authentic recipe around.  
On Monday you went shopping for ingredients. You knew a small world foods store that was just outside of town, you’d been there a couple of times when you’d been baking with the children for class. With help from signposted aisles, you found what you were looking for in no time at all, so that night, you and Soojung both tucked into your first (sort of) homemade lasagne. Only the Bechamel sauces was harder to master than you’d first thought. 
“I think you added too much flour.” Soojung’s nose wrinkled as she spoke. “It’s nice, don’t get me wrong, but the white stuff… I don’t know, maybe it’s supposed to taste like that?” 
Nope, she was definitely correct, too much flour, which was odd because you were pretty positive you’d followed the right measurements… 
Tuesday you had a day off from the sight, and even the word lasagne. You met for coffee with your mom but kept the date with Seokjin a secret. Not that she pressed about your love life anymore, she’d long given up on that topic. It was nice to catch up and you made plans for a trip soon. It was hard to find time to visit her when you were in work so you were always thankful for the summer and Christmas breaks. You were her only child, so it made your time together even more precious. She’d only remarried ten years ago, and while Jonathon had kids from his first marriage, they lived abroad. They were older than you and had families of their own. You weren’t particularly close for no other reason than the distance. You’d only met them a few times but they were lovely people. Your father had remarried while you were still in high school, having two more children (a son and daughter) with his wife. You were very close to them despite the age gap and saw them as regularly as you could. Your extended family had long been the norm and you wouldn’t change it for the world. 
Wednesday you were back on the lasagne. You purchased more pasta sauce and decided on the pre-made Bechamel sauce too, just to be safe. This time around everything went smoothly, Soojung had no complaints and neither did you, but you still invited Taehyung around on Thursday for a third go. He was way more enthusiastic than your best friend, singing your praises all night. 
“Y/N, that was amazing!” He exclaimed, leaning back in his chair to pat his belly. “Dilf dick – Uh, I mean, Seokjin, is going to love it.” 
“Guys, is that what you really call him when you’re alone together?” You whined. 
“Blame Soo,” Taehyung shrugged. “She’s rubbed off on me. But, I’m right,” he smirked. “He’s going to want to give you his DD once he tastes this, if you know what I mean.” 
Wiggling his eyebrows suggestively, you looked on unimpressed. Maybe if you gave them no reaction they’d stop? 
“Oooo. I wonder what his dick even looks like. I bet it’s as handsome as his face.” Soojung squealed, sat beside her boyfriend. 
“SOOJUNG!” He cried, mouth open in disbelief. 
“Can we just stop talking about his… y’know…” You sighed, unable to say the word aloud. “Imagine if it was the other way around and he was wondering about what I looked like naked.” Soojung wouldn’t be impressed, that was for sure. 
“Fine, you’re right,” your best friend sighed. “I’m just way too excited because you finally like someone!!” She was getting loud now, she always did when she was excited. “And I want it to work out because you deserve it!” 
You chuckled. “Soo, calm down.” But you had to admit her words were sweet. You reached for her hand across the tiny table, giving it a gentle squeeze of thanks. 
“What about Barman dick?” Taehyung asked randomly, totally oblivious that you and she were having a moment. “Huh? Soo? You want my Barman dick tonight?” He wiggled his eyebrows again, a playfulness to his voice as he nudged her. 
She giggled but wasn’t having any of it. “It doesn’t really have the same ring to it, babe.” 
Highly offended he pulled away, pursing his lips. “Whatever.”
“Okay guys, let’s not have a domestic at the dining table.” You laughed. Which was a mistake because now Taehyung’s attention was back on you. 
“So, Y/N, when are you going to invite Mr. Dilf to my bar?”
You sniggered. “How about never?”
“Hey, you ladies are being very mean tonight. I complimented your lasagne.” Hm. That was true, you guessed. “What’s wrong with my bar? I think he’d love it. What does he drink? I see him as a dark rum type of guy.” 
You shrugged. “He was drinking red wine on our date last week.” It still made you feel funny to say the word date. You’d gone on a date. You were dating. A flurry of excitement found its way to your stomach, your excitement for Saturday growing. 
“Interesting,” Taehyung mused.
Soojung stood up, starting to collect your plates. “Okay, I’m washing, who’s drying?”
“Not me,” you sang. “I’ve cooked nearly every night this week.” 
Soojung eyes were wide when you met them, as if she was silently begging you. For what? “Just please promise me there won’t be any lasagne waiting for me after work tomorrow night? I’m going to turn into one at this rate.” 
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Saturday arrived soon enough. You woke up the same time your phone went Bing and you knew exactly who it was. Seokjin had been texting you Good morning every day since Monday. He was no longer signing them off with his name, which was progress, and he was even adding more emojis, so you guessed you had rubbed off on him. 
Sometimes he’d drop a meme with the greeting. They were mostly to do with early mornings and workloads to which you’d tease him about because it was your summer vacation after all, you didn’t need to worry about work. But you always sent a Hope today runs smoothly his way too. You didn’t want to rub it in too much. 
Yesterday’s meme had been about dating, something about the guy trying to flirt but being garbage at it and asking if she liked cheese. You didn’t agree that was like Seokjin though – you were gradually learning that he was incredibly modest – but it had made you laugh. Only Seokjin could send you lame memes and you’d find it adorable… You were possibly whipped. 
Seokjin (8:01am)  Good morning. [Image sent] 
Today the meme was about lasagne, which made you question whether he was googling these every morning because no way had a lasagne meme popped up on his social media – if he used any at all. The realisation that he was searching for memes every day was even more endearing and your heart got a little gooey. You read the text on top of the image of lasagne. Dude, is that your new white shirt? Lemme just hop off this fork for a closer look. You genuinely laughed at that one, still wrapped up in your bed sheets. So incredibly lame, but equal levels funny. 
Seokjin (8:01am)  I will not be wearing white… I can’t wait to see you later. Just a reminder that I hope you omitted the garlic for tonight’s meal. I don’t want to embarrass myself by itching all night 😅😂
Immediately the smile dropped from your face and you shot forward, horror washing over you. Oh no. He was allergic to garlic. With the stress of perfecting the world’s best lasagne you’d totally forgotten. What were you going to do? Find a plain tomato sauce? Where the hell were you going to find one? Was that even a thing? You needed to leave now. Jumping out of bed you almost forgot to message Seokjin back. Looking at your phone again the image of the lasagne mocked you… 
.
.
Two hours later you were back at home, in need of a sit down after you’d rushed around town looking for a pasta sauce that didn’t contain garlic (very hard, by the way.) The stress had aged you about ten years. Soojung of course found it highly hilarious. 
“You’d have been in ER before 9pm,” she chortled, still in her pyjamas on the couch. She’d been still asleep when you’d dashed off, a woman on a lasagne mission. 
You ignored her. It wouldn’t have been that bad, right? He said himself he’d only be itching… Clawing off his own skin was probably better than his throat closing up… maybe… 
“How did you manage to forget?” She was still laughing. “AND you said you’d make a lasagne. Italian food always uses garlic. He must think you’re trying to kill him.” At this point you could hardly understand her, words blurring into one as she lost her shit. 
“We went over this. I wasn’t in my right mind when I said I’d cook lasagne.”
She stopped her laugher immediately.  “No way, you’re not blaming me again.” 
“Ugh.” You sighed, suddenly remembering something. “I was going to make my homemade garlic bread.” Now that was a speciality of yours. This night was going to be a disaster.
“Skip the garlic,” Soojung suggested. 
“So, just bread then.” 
She tried her best not to laugh again, not wanting to make it worse. “Yum.” 
It didn’t help. 
What did help though, was making her clean the entirety of the downstairs of the house. As the day went on you started to get more and more nervous, which was silly, but you couldn’t help it. You realised that your place was a shoe box in comparison to his, what the hell were you thinking when you’d invited him here?! It needed to be spotless, to distract him from the fact you would be eating dinner in the same place you would be cooking it… 
You knew there was no need to worry, it was just like last week when you’d grown self-conscious only to be fine once you’d set eyes on Seokjin. No doubt tonight would be just the same, he didn’t give a crap about stuff like that, so why would you even think he would? He’d probably be hurt if he knew… You just couldn’t help those little bubbles of insecurities from floating around inside your brain. You were a law unto yourself, and the garlic-less lasagne wasn’t helping. You’d had no time to prep for it. What if it tasted like cardboard? 
“Lasagne is lasagne,” Soojung reassured you, in the kitchen as you got all the ingredients together. “It’s not going to taste gross just because there’s no garlic in it. Put it this way, at least you can kiss without needing to pop a mint.” 
You whined, shaking your head, you couldn’t even dare thinking about kissing him right now. You’d spontaneously combust from anxiety. 
“Should we clean your room too?” She asked, picking up the jar of pasta sauce absentmindedly. You’d already read the label approximately fifteen times, double checking it was indeed garlic-less. 
“What? No,” you told her, voice all high-pitched. There would be no going upstairs besides from bathroom usage. “But hey,” you exclaimed, rounding on her with the spoon you were holding in your hand. “My room is always clean, bitch.”
She was the messy one.
.
.
Soojung left for Taehyung’s place at half 6, ready for Seokjin’s arrival at 7pm, a hug for good luck before you waved her off. You’d calmed greatly now, nothing like some table laying to ease some nerves. The lasagne was prepped and ready to oven cook, you had a fresh key lime pie in the fridge and you were dressed and presentable with ten minutes to spare. Wonderful. 
The doorbell rung not long after you’d made your way downstairs and you were quickly finding out that Seokjin was a very punctual man. Opening the door to reveal him stood at the porch your heart instantly warmed, skipping a beat when he gave you a dazzling smile and a soft Hey. You felt a little weak at the knees. Nope, you were not ready for tonight. 
In your tiny entryway he offered you a silver gift bag. “I didn’t know what to bring, so.” He said with a shrug as you pulled out a bottle of red wine. 
“Oh, thank you, Seokjin.” You hadn’t been expecting him to bring anything at all. It was a lovely surprise. 
“You probably have some waiting already. I’m sorry.”
“No, no, it’s fine,” you reassured him. “We’ll use this one.” You were going to use a bottle of white wine you had laying around, nothing special at all. Red wine seemed better, fancier, maybe it would go better with the lasagne?
“Are you sure?” He asked. “I was gonna get you flowers but I didn’t want to freak you out or anything.”
You laughed. What was he going on about? “Why would that freak me out?”
His smile was crooked as he chuckled quietly. “I don’t know. I’m new to this, I thought they would’ve been too forward.” 
You gave a small shrug, voice barely there when you replied. “I like flowers.”
He gazed at you, warm eyes softening as he stepped forward. “Next time.” He smiled. “Next time I’ll get you flowers.” 
You swallowed fairly loudly, averting your gaze as you outstretched your arms. “Let me take you coat.” Was it hot in here? You felt a little stuffy. 
He shrugged off the beige wool blend, revealing the tight fitting black shirt he had on underneath. It stretched over his shoulders, accentuating how broad they were, how hard his chest was and how much his waist curved inwards. The pants he was wearing didn’t help matters too. He looked effortlessly gorgeous, hair parted to the side, a piece curled above his left eye, softening the blow of his exposed forehead. You moved to hook his coat on the rack, realising you could’ve been gawping. Not that you could help it, the man was trying to kill you.
As you turned to face him again, he smiled. “You look really nice.” His voice was soft which just made it even more dangerous. “I think this may be the first time I’ve seen you in pants.” 
“Really?” You wondered. You were partial to a dress in the summer, so he was probably right. You’d chosen a pair of black skinny jeans and a patterned chiffon blouse. Nothing too fancy, but he looked at you with awe-filled eyes. Unless you were imagining it. You cleared your throat. “You look good too.”
He stepped back, arms outstretched as he looked down at himself. “Thanks. No white.” He chuckled. 
You forced yourself to laugh too, nerves creeping back just because of your stupid damn lasagne. “No white.” 
Moving forward again he took your hand. It was warm and soft, just as you remembered from last week. Who cared about the lasagne when you were this close to him? When he was looking down at you with those brown, twinkly eyes? Not you anymore. 
“I’ve been looking forward to this all week, Y/N.” 
Oh.
.
.
You invited him inside the living room first, pouring him a small (and his only because he the car) glass of wine as you chit chatted for a few minutes. Sat next to him was RJ, who you’d taken from your bedroom to join you both for the night. He wanted to say Hi, had been your opening line and Seokjin had found it hilarious, cracking up instantly. Although his “I missed you buddy, how have you been?” went rudely ignored. Maybe the alpaca was nervous… 
Ever the gentleman, he complimented you on the house, noting the décor with a fond eye. That surprised you, maybe he had played a part with the interior of his home. Well, you’d only seen the cosy family room – but it suited him very well. You knew there had been no need to be nervous when it came to inviting him into your home. There wasn’t a judging bone in Seokjin’s body. 
You talked about your weeks, yours had been fine, but of course you left out all the stress over the lasagne. Seokjin’s week on the other hand had been quite demanding, but that was nothing new he told you with an accepting shake of his hand. He was used to it by now, but he had to admit tonight’s date had made it easier this time around. He was full of the charm, not that you were complaining…
Misook was babysitting Arin tonight, he told you when you asked how she was. It was his weekend this week, he and Nana took it in turns – when she didn’t cancel, he added as an afterthought – but he seemed a lot more relaxed talking about his ex-wife this time around seeing as last weekend she hadn’t broken any promises. He was happy if his daughter was happy, and that made you smile. You remembered Arin’s sorrowful face that day her mom had cancelled on her, so you were glad they’d found time to spend time together. You also remembered how irritated Seokjin had sounded when he was opening up to you on the bench at the school fate… You wondered just how often Nana cancelled plans, and couldn’t imagine how frustrating that was for both Arin and Seokjin… You hoped this marked the start of things being easier for them now. 
Soon after that, you served him your starter (“garlic – wait, no I mean, no-garlic bread.”), and you chatted some more over that and while the lasagne baked. It was surprising how little you’d touched the sides on your first date, so tonight you covered even more bases. Family mainly. You told him about your half and step siblings, your parents’ remarriages of course coming up too. He seemed interested in that, wondering about your views on it and if it had affected you as you grew up. As a divorcee you understood the relevance to him and because he was so easy to talk to you found yourself opening up freely. 
His parents were still married and Seokjin was the youngest out of their two sons, so it was quite unheard of for the second born to take over a family company. In fact, it was the first of its kind for his, which made it even harder for him. His older brother had been the rightful heir to LG Electronics but his passion had always been in culinary arts. His parents had been kind enough to let him follow his dreams, and thankfully, for Seokjin, that meant he could follow in his father’s footsteps. He’d been eager to prove himself but it had been hard in the beginning. His status as the youngest son meant that a lot of people set him up for failure, but with his family’s love and belief he’d managed to succeed and confirm himself as the rightful CEO. You didn’t doubt it. It seemed he’d worked hard to get where he was now. That was admirable. 
The influx of information was so interesting to you and it didn’t feel real. While you could imagine Seokjin taking charge, visualising him in that tailored houndstooth suit he’d worn when you’d first met him, it was strange to think the smiley and soft-spoken man sat in front of you was from a long line of power and wealth. He should be untouchable, yet here you were able to reach for his hand across the table. Able to feel his forefinger stroking delicate patterns into your palm as you opened up and got to know one another more and more… 
“So, if your family’s a big deal, what about things like arranged marriages? Are they still a thing?” You asked, maybe confusing fiction for fact. 
Seokjin laughed at your wording. “They used to be, not so much anymore. I met my ex-wife through a friend. They concentrate less on things like that these days.” He shrugged, adding as an afterthought, “As a divorced CEO I think I’m a great example of that.” 
That was true, you thought to yourself, wondering how the breakdown of his marriage had also played a part in the stress of his early years as CEO. 
“I know it all sounds pretty crazy, but I like to think my family is just like anyone else’s.” He continued, smiling bashfully when you met his gaze. “That I’m just like anyone else.” 
You wondered how many people had immediately judged him because of his status… You’d been one of them, right? Even if you hadn’t known any of the details, you’d written him off as some obnoxious, rich guy who flaunted his wealth… You felt guilty thinking back. He was the complete opposite.
You nodded in agreement before grinning. “I’d have liked to see what college Seokjin was like.” 
“A complete nerd, to tell you the truth.” 
He answered so seriously, you didn’t know how to react, and then he was laughing loudly, cracking up at himself. You couldn’t help but join in. That’s when your stove alarm went off, shrill and incessant, signalling the arrival of the dreaded lasagne…
It turned out he loved it though. 
“This is amazing,” Seokjin praised, mouth still half full as he chewed. You did have to admit it was good. It tasted just like the original, despite the lack of garlic. Seokjin quirked an eyebrow, smirking your way. “So, how lucky am I to be able to try this World famous Italian lasagne?” 
“Very lucky.” You kept your answer short. Hoping he’d just drop it. 
He didn’t. 
“How lucky?” He tried to pry from you. “How many people have tried it?” 
You gave him a small smile, hovering your fork over the plate. Technically he was the third, but you couldn’t tell him that, could you? “I can’t disclose that.” 
He emitted a short laugh. “What about the recipe? Care to share?” 
You brushed him off with a soft chuckle. “A chef never tells her secrets.”
“Not even me?” His bottom lip jutted out as he looked across at you. 
Your heart did a little dance. He was being unfair. “Don’t pout like that, it’s making me feel guilty.” 
Thankfully the lasagne topic fizzled out after a couple more minutes, your cold sweat having time to dissipate while you chatted and ate together comfortably. However a few minutes later you noticed Seokjin fidgeting slightly in his seat. You politely ignored it to begin with, unsure if you were just imagining it, but then he started itching the back of his neck. You put your fork down, a sick feeling washing over you. “Is anything wrong?” You asked, now watching him itch up his forearm. “Seokjin?”
He looked at you in mild confusion, eyebrows creasing together as he opened his mouth. “Are you sure there wasn’t any garlic in this?” 
You swallowed away the panic racing up your throat. “I’m sure.” You’d read the back of that jar and then read it some more. “I’m positive.” 
… Weren’t you? You watched him scoot his chair back, leaning down to start scratching the back of his calves. He made noises of discomfort as he did so. 
“Oh, no…” You were up before you could stop yourself, racing around him to start hunting in the recycling for the glass jar. 
“Wait, where are you going?” 
You could hear Seokjin’s voice behind you, sounding alarmed, but you were too panicked to really take it in. You needed to be sure. This was just your second date, you couldn’t ruin things already. Turning him into one giant itchy red blob had not been your intention.  
“I was only teasing you.” Still, his words didn’t sink in. That was until you felt a hand on your elbow, tugging gently for your attention. 
You spun around, worried eyes wide – even wider when you found him so close. He was on his feet too, bent a little to level with you, pretty much within kissing distance. His voice was soft when he spoke, you found yourself distracted by his mouth. “Y/N, I was just messing around.”
You blinked, not truly understanding with all those annoying distractions zooming around your mind, but slowly you pieced his words together. Oh. Despite the relief you felt, now you just felt silly. Plus, he was still so close to you… 
You took a step back, the small of your back pressing up against the counter. You needed a clear head. “Don’t freak me out like that.” You told him, but you still sighed in relief, hand against your chest. “I thought I’d poisoned you.” 
He looked a little concerned, but you could tell by his eyes he found your reaction amusing. “I’m sorry,” he apologised. “I just wanted to make you laugh.”
“Make me laugh? You nearly gave me heart failure.” However, you gave him what he wanted, a laugh that sounded weak and shaky, but it was something – you did see the funny side. 
He joined you, shoulders relaxing now that he knew you were okay. He looked behind you, eyes on the trashcan, a bemused smile on his face. “What were you looking for anyway?”
“The jar.” You answered, as if it wasn’t obvious. You turned, deciding to fish it out anyway. Holding it up to him, you were adamant. “See, no garlic. Check.” 
He chuckled. “I already said I was joking.” He took one look at your desperate expression and gave in, taking the jar from your hand. “But if it makes you feel better…” You watched him as he read the label, silently soaking in his handsome features. He looked softer tonight, the curve of his jaw rounding as he smiled. It took you a moment to realise he was done. He handed the jar back to you, and you prayed to God he hadn’t caught you staring at him all gooey-eyed. “It’s fine.” He confirmed. “I’ll be itch free tonight.” 
You smiled and plopped the glass back inside the can. “I looked around town for hour trying to find lasagne sauce sans garlic.” 
He looked guilty. “I’m sorry for being awkward.” Then he paused, eyes narrowing, the hint of a smirk itching at the corners of his mouth. “But… Y/N, are you a fraud?” Huh? What did he mean? You didn’t need to wait long for an explanation. “I thought a certified chef would cook up a batch of her own tomato sauce.”
Oh. You’d gone and put your foot in it, hadn’t you? It was probably time to explain yourself… “I have a confession,” you began, sounding wary. Seokjin looked interested albeit it mildly confused. “I… may have told a little white lie.”
He shook his head, a puff of laughter leaving him. “You’ve lost me.” 
You took a deep breath, knowing you were going to have to spell it out for him. “I’ve never made lasagne before. Ever. In my entire life.” 
He looked confused as silence spread out between you. He sounded it too when he spoke again. “Then why did you say it was your speciality?”
You groaned, dropping your face into your hands for one dramatic moment. “I panicked.” Peeking at him, you babbled on. “I know it sounds stupid but Soojung was curtain twitching and it was stressing me out and then you were asking me what I cooked and lasagne just popped into my head!”
Seokjin blinked, his mouth twitched and then he was laughing – loudly. 
“You find it funny?” You asked, relaxing a tad. 
“Very.” He laughed harder but seeing the look of bafflement on your face he tried is best to still it. 
“I’ve been practicing it like crazy,” you whined, happy you could finally tell him all about your lasagne struggles. “This is my fourth time eating it this week. Soojung nearly killed me.” You snorted at the memory. This started up Seokjin again. “And then I forgot you were allergic to garlic. Your text reminded me this morning and I had to rush out to the grocery store.” 
He was weak at the knees at that, and you were laughing just because he was. It was contagious. “Stop,” you wailed, attempting to get a hold of yourself. This week had actually been quite traumatic. “I’m glad you find it funny, I’ve been in constant stress ever since you drove off last week.” 
“I can’t help it.” He chuckled, although he did sound apologetic. “You’re just so adorable.” The air that settled around his effortless admission made your skin prickle. When he carried on, his tone was gentle. “You know I wouldn’t have minded if you changed the menu to something else, right?” 
You pouted ever so slightly. “But you were looking forward to it.” 
He gave a small shrug. “True, but… that was more so code for ‘I’m looking forward to seeing you again.’ The food was just a bonus. I’d be happy with a Big Mac.” 
You felt your cheeks burn and you tried to shake yourself out of it. “So embarrassing,” you murmured. You didn’t know what for… The lasagne mess or the fact he could have this much of an effect of you? You were inclined to go with the latter. 
“What about the no-garlic bread?” Seokjin asked, changing the subject a little. Maybe he’d sensed your embarrassment and didn’t want to make it worse. He was sweet. “Did you make that?”
“Yeah,” you nodded. “Well, I didn’t bake the bread. I just toasted it.” It was still a speciality of yours though. “It would’ve been much tastier with the garlic.” 
He gave you an apologetic smile. “Sorry about that. This body wants to turn me into a miserable old man.” 
Pfft. Old? Miserable? He was anything but. 
“Sit,” he prompted you, smiling as he motioned with his head to the table. “Finish your World famous Italian lasagne before it grows cold.” 
As you moved he delicately cupped his hand around the curve your waist, giving it a soft squeeze before he got to his chair first. Your stomach flipped, head dizzy as you sat and tucked your chair in. Last Saturday popped into your head, the way you’d loosely held hands outside and how you were sure he’d been leaning in to kiss you – properly. 
You knew one thing. You really wanted to kiss him tonight. 
Trying to get a hold of yourself, you glanced at him, catching his eyes. He was already tucking in again, and he grinned bashfully, as if embarrassed. “This really is great. All that practice paid off.” A pause. “You should show me how you cooked it sometime.” 
Your face lit up in surprise. “You cook?” In the back of your mind you were aware that he’d probably been hinting for a third date, but you were so shocked by the possibly of Seokjin cooking you couldn’t stop yourself from asking. 
He chuckled quietly. “I mean, when I have time and can be bothered. I like cooking but it’s just easier to go to a restaurant or get it delivered.” He looked sheepish before adding, “Or Misook does it for me.” 
There was no shame when it came to that. Seokjin probably worked all hours of the day, no one could expect him to tie on an apron when he got home and start pulling out pots and pans. 
“Do you cook a lot?” He asked. 
You nodded. “Soojung and I take it in turns.” 
“So what is your speciality?” He smiled. 
This time around you were in your right mind and able to answer properly. “Veggie tacos.” 
He raised his eyebrows, impressed. Then he tried again. “Can you make them for me sometime?”
He was persistent, you’d give him that. You shrugged, trying your best to sound impassive but the little smirk gave it away. “Maybe if you say please…” 
He laughed, leaning forward, a hand clasping yours as he tilted his head. The piece of curled hair falling into his left eye. “Please?”
Your heart did another little dance inside your chest. 
.
After dessert you both made your way back to the living room, settling on your couch with two pomegranate mocktails Taehyung had prepared for you yesterday. All you had to do was add the pomegranate juice and lemonade to the ice cubes and crushed lime segments and mint before serving, easy-peasy. Seokjin was highly impressed, but of course you couldn’t take the credit. It was all down to your best friend’s very helpful barman boyfriend. 
You were glad Seokjin wanted to stay as you didn’t want the night to be over yet. It had flown by so fast and you’d had so much fun. You already felt like you knew him better, even after only two dates. It was strange to you, how you could feel so relaxed in a stranger’s company, but then again, you guessed he wasn’t a stranger anymore… Plus, he was so easy to talk to, so interesting to get to know…. Everything between you two came easy. 
Like opening up to him, being a bit more vulnerable… 
“I’ve been slightly nervous all week,” you admitted, clutching your drink to you before chuckling softly. “– and not just about the lasagne faux pas…” 
“There was no need to be nervous. I thought we left all that behind on the first date,” Seokjin reassured, smiling warmly your way. 
You were sat together, turned to face one another. It was intimate and cosy. He had one leg lifted, the ankle resting on the knee of the other leg, and where his pants had ridden up, you could see an inch or so of his calf before it met the black cotton of his sock. For some reason, you found that very, very sexy. Maybe you had been single for far too long. 
“We did,” you agreed, hesitating slightly. “It’s just… I haven’t done anything like this in so long.” 
You didn’t even think you’d ever invited someone around for dinner before. You were still quite young when you found yourself in a relationship with Donghae so your dates before him had been very basic. Your dates with him hadn’t really classed as such just because you became official fairly quickly, and your dates after him, well, it was already known that they had been few and far between. 
“You already know we’re in the same boat,” he smiled before chuckling bashfully. “No, but really, when I asked you for dinner that day at the fate I was expecting you to turn me down.” 
“How come?”
He looked down at his drink, lifting a shoulder. “I thought you’d think that I was crossing a line… or maybe the spark I was feeling was all in my head and in reality you just found me really annoying.” 
That was cute. He’d been doubting himself. Human after all. Not that you’d ever thought he wasn’t. You still didn’t miss the opportunity to joke around though. “I mean, both can exist simultaneously.” He taking a sip of his mocktail when you replied so he ended up snorting into his glass, amused by your wit. 
A moment or so passed and Seokjin gazed at you, smiling softly. If he kept this up, you’d be a puddle on your parquet flooring. “So, tell me,” he hummed. “How did I luck out so good?” You raised an eyebrow, wondering what he meant. “How come an amazing person like you isn’t married or in a relationship?”
He must’ve seen the slight shock on your face and panicked instantly. “Is that a weird thing to ask? I feel like it is. I apologise.”
“No,” you insisted, sitting up a little straighter. He followed. “No, it’s not.” You wanted to open up to him. You really did. You just didn’t know where to start. Although, it was pretty simple. “I’ve been single for a while.” 
“How long?” Seokjin was instantly focused, attentive, noticing the change in your body language. 
“Three years. My last relationship didn’t end very well.” You paused, wondering if you should continue. But then… It had been a massive part of your life. No matter how much time had passed and no matter how okay you were now, it had still happened. And Seokjin, he had trusted you enough to open up about his divorce – even before you’d gone on your first date. You wanted to talk about it. You really did. 
“I found out my fiancé was cheating on me.”  
Seokjin’s eyes widened, unable to cloak his surprise. He hadn’t been expecting that. “I’m sorry to hear that,” he said sincerely. 
“It’s fine,” you smiled. “It was rough getting over it. Took me a while, but it is what it is. It’s in the past now.” 
“Did it put you off dating?” 
You were pleasantly surprised to find it was actually easy to talk to Seokjin about this. Your mouth was opening before you had to think about it. “I mean, at first. I was still very much in love with him, even after he broke my heart. But I got over him and I started dating again – briefly – It just didn’t feel right.” You stopped to smile. “It’s been over a year and I can’t say I missed it… but you…” Nerves growing, you pushed them away. “You’ve changed that. I’m having fun.” 
Seokjin’s face lit up and he chuckled. “I did hit second date status after all.” 
“You did…” 
“So,” he leaned closer, a small smirk on his face. “You could say, hitting your car that day wasn’t actually my fault because it was supposed to happen.” 
You snorted as you laughed, head falling against the back of the couch. “I wouldn’t go that far.” 
He made a sound. “But we wouldn’t have met otherwise.” 
“We would!” You exclaimed. “The parent-teacher meeting.” 
He blinked, feeling dumb. “Oh, yeah.” 
It wouldn’t have had the same effect, granted, but you would have become acquainted with one another regardless. “Would you have still liked me?” You asked without thinking, surprising yourself. 
“Yes,” he replied immediately. “I was instantly attracted to you after all, it’s just…” Instantly attracted? Definitely a charmer... “There would’ve been no way for me to get to know you like I did.”
You narrowed your eyes. “You’re really adamant that you had to reverse into my car to make this work, huh.”
He shrugged casually. “It was the only way.” 
You laughed quietly, finishing the last of your drink. Time was getting on, it was pretty late, Seokjin had already finished his, you watched him sit up to lean forward and place the glass on your coffee table. His shirt tightened across his shoulder blades and you could see his back muscles as he stretched. Oh.  
Settling back into the same position, he looked over at you and grinned. His teeth were perfect. Did this man have zero flaws? Why were you so whipped? It was embarrassing. 
“I had fun tonight,” you told him, trying to keep a lid on whatever was going on with you right now. 
He seemed pleased with that, nodding his head. “I’m happy to hear that you think I’m a fun person.” 
You scoffed, body falling closer to his. Your shoulders brushed together. Seokjin didn’t take his eyes off you. “Hm. I don’t think I said that.” 
“Hey, don’t be so mean.” He murmured, one side of his mouth quirking up. 
Like you couldn’t stop yourself, your hand reached for the collar of shirt. He had the top two buttons loose and your pinkie finger brushed against his collarbone. Sparks flew, but you tried to ignore them. “I thought you liked it when I was mean.” You teased, voice low. 
Seokjin hummed, his eyes still twinkled like they always did but there was something else to them, a depth that made you feel funny. He sunk closer to you. So close you could study the thick curve of his eyelashes, notice that both his eyelids were different. He really did have beautiful eyes. You could stare at them forever. 
Preoccupied, you slowly realised that he was watching you too, studying your features in the golden glow of the floor lamp that hovered over the couch. His lips parted, you heard them rather than saw it, but then your attention was on them again. Just like it had been earlier on in the night. He was staring at yours too as he spoke. “I wanted to kiss you last week.” 
You heartbeat quickened but you tried to keep cool. “You did kiss me.” You laughed. 
He sighed. “On the cheek.”  
You lightly tugged his collar, fingertips now brushing the skin of his chest. “Isn’t that what you said you wanted to do?”
You could feel his own heartbeat against your forearm that was pressed into him. It was definitely running a little faster than it was supposed to – stronger. “Yes, but…” He glanced up to your eyes. “I was just being polite. I wanted to kiss your lips.”
It felt like you were holding your breath. Maybe you were, you just couldn’t think straight. Time seemed to stretch out, but you knew what you wanted. So you went after it. Giving him a small smile, you replied. “Maybe I wanted that too.” 
He swallowed, voice so low now it was barely a murmur. “Is that an invitation?” His eyes bounced to your lips again, then back to your eyes as he asked permission. “Can I kiss you?”
You ever so slightly dragged your bottom lip beneath your teeth as you nodded, breath catching in your throat as Seokjin leaned forward and closed the distance between you. The hand in between your bodies moved to delicately hold the wrist of your arm against his chest, holding you there as his other hand reached for your jaw, angling your face to press a kiss to your mouth. His eyes were already closed so you followed. 
He hummed at the contact, his lips soft and warm and you let yourself sink. His actions were light at first, faint as he kept constant pressure, as if he was familiarising himself with the sensation. You couldn’t even let yourself think about how this was the first kiss you’d shared with someone for a very long time. All that was going through your mind was how good it felt to be touched like this by him. 
He readjusted the hand on your face, tucking some hair behind your ear to cup your cheek. You liked that. You liked it when he touched you, and he eased from your mouth completely before coming back with a firmer pressure. It was your turn to make a sound; a tiny gasp as your lips began to move together ever so slowly. He liked that, a hum of satisfaction vibrating against the soft skin of your lips. You clutched at his shirt, gathering the crisp cotton in your fist, that would surely turn it creased, but he didn’t seem to mind. He was too preoccupied with reaching for the glass you’d forgotten was hugged to your body by your free hand. 
He unclasped it from your fingers and had no choice but to break away from your mouth to put it next to his on the coffee table. You whined, attempting to tug him back to you, and he chuckled, taking a hold of one of your hands. “I’ll be back,” he whispered, leaning forward to place the cocktail glass down. 
And he was. 
This time he used both of his hands to grasp your face and dive back in. He was more confident this time, moving in such a way his lips pried yours open. You reached for his shoulders, grasping them to hold him closer and this time you both made noises – sweet, quiet ones that worked beautiful together as your lips moulded with gradual urgency. 
When your hands found the nape of his neck, fingers through his hair, he had to drag the tip of his tongue across your bottom lip, seeking entry. You met it with yours, tasting hints of pomegranate and lime with each wash of tongue. A hand of his slipped down to your side, stroking up and down the curve as if he couldn’t help but to touch you. He settled at your hip after a moment, the other splayed against the side of your neck, his thumb rolling small circles under your cheekbone. 
This was getting addictive. You could tell by the way you moaned softly against each warm, wet curl of his tongue. This was everything you’d imagined and more – because you had imagined it. Late and secretly at night when you were trying to drift off to sleep and thoughts of lasagne were banished… You were glad your first kiss was here, inside, on your couch, because this wasn’t something for the open, your knees wouldn’t have been able to hold you up. 
You could have kissed him forever, you mean, you definitely didn’t want it to stop but you pretty much had to. Breathing was a necessity, right? If you couldn’t breathe you wouldn’t be able to ever kiss Seokjin again and that would be absolutely awful… 
You did it the right way though – gradually. Seokjin slowed it right down, only hints of his tongue left as he hummed indulgently, like he was savouring your taste before he had to inevitably pull away. It made your insides jump around like crazy, hearing him enjoying himself, and you tried your best to come to when he started easing the pressure of his lips, pressing small, chaste kisses to them instead as you ultimately (but slowly) broke apart. 
You opened your eyes, blinking up at him, hands falling from his hair, aware you had become one with your cushions. You struggled to free yourself as he sat back and you watched him smile fondly at you. His breath was shaky – so was yours, and you were sure his hands trembled slightly as one reached up to scratch the back of his neck. His neck that was blotched with red, flushed, travelling to his cheeks. They were rosier than you’d ever seen them before. Your gut stirred. 
“I’ve been dreaming of that,” he told you, before making a face at himself. “Too cringey?” 
You giggled – it sounded foreign. “Just a bit.” But didn’t deter the fact you loved it. 
You warmed when you felt him squeeze your hip, realising his hand was still there and you reached for it, tangling your fingers with his. He pulled them to his mouth, kissing your knuckles softly. His expression was thoughtful when he lowered your hands. “In all seriousness, thank you for giving me a chance, after well, you know, everything.”
You smiled, touched by his earnestness, but it was hard to keep a sane mind when his lips were as kiss bitten as they were – deep pink and glistening. You wanted to kiss his face off. 
“It’s no problem,” you quipped, as if you were doing him a favour. 
He chuckled tenderly, and luckily for you he was unable to stop himself from kissing you again. He reached forward, hooking a finger under your chin to press his mouth to yours softly. “I’d really love if we could keep on doing… this.” He murmured. 
“The dating or the kissing,” you grinned, stealing another kiss in the process. 
“Hm,” he contemplated. “Both preferably.” 
And then you were on one another again, eager once more. 
Although, you did manage to pull away briefly to tell him something, his mouth moving to the side of your face to kiss there instead as your hands dragged down his back. You were somehow able to get the words out – ones that made him laugh against your wet jaw. 
“I’m so glad you hit my car.” 
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Written 2020 - 2021.  Please refrain from posting my work elsewhere. No translations allowed. © floralseokjin 2021
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buckleyblueyes · 3 years
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if you're doing the soft prompts thing, could i request " i knew you wouldn't go to sleep willingly, so i brought you some chamomile tea and a blanket. twenty minutes of shut-eye, okay? " + buddie? preferably post shooting but whatever you like, thank you ❤
At long last! I am finally filling this prompt! It didn't turn out to be a recovery fic, but it's definitely impacted by the events of 4x14, so I really hope you like it! It's very soft.
Buck is being ridiculous. Absolutely irrational. He’s well aware of this fact. And yet, he finds his thumb hovering over the call button.
It’s not like it’s Christopher’s first sleepover. He’s eleven years old, of course it’s not. It’s not his first sleepover since the pandemic, either, or since Eddie was shot. He’s had quite a few since then, actually. It’s not even his first sleepover since he and Eddie went from work partners to life partners.
But it is Christopher’s first sleepover since Buck moved in with them. The first time he spent his evening cooking dinner for only two. The first time he didn’t have to help with homework or watch a movie that Christopher picked out. The first time in a month that Buck has had to go to sleep without kissing his head goodnight.
And sure, there were good parts. There are certain benefits to being alone with his boyfriend and not having to worry about being unknowingly interrupted by an eleven year old. But it’s nearly midnight now and all that’s left to do is sleep--or at least, pretend to sleep while actually staring at the ceiling and wait for a panicked middle of the night call because something went wrong.
He’s sitting up in the bed he and Eddie now share, phone in hand, willing himself not to call Christopher and check in. He knows Christopher is a pre-teen now, that he’s probably having a great time, that his calling would just be embarrassing, and probably (hopefully) wake him up. He sighs, tossing his phone down on the empty pillow beside him. It’s going to be a long night.
Eddie is supposed to be in bed with him, and he’s sure being alone is making it worse. He’s not even sure where Eddie is--he said he would follow Buck to bed after getting some water and brushing his teeth--but it’s been a little too long for just teeth brushing, so Buck has a feeling his boyfriend is up to something. His suspicions are confirmed a moment later when he hears the tea kettle whistling. Odd, considering the tea kettle is Buck’s, something he brought with him when he moved in--Eddie isn’t a big tea drinker, usually only drinking it when he’s sick, preferring to caffeinate with coffee.
Buck only has to wonder what Eddie is doing for a few moments before Eddie shuffles into their bedroom, a blanket Buck recognizes from Christopher’s bed piled under one arm and a steaming mug in the other hand.
“Whatcha got there?” Buck asks, glad for a distraction at least.
“Well,” Eddie sets the mug down on Buck’s bedside table. “I knew you wouldn’t go to sleep willingly, so I brought you some chamomile tea and a blanket.” He tosses the blanket at Buck’s face. It smells like Christopher’s no-tears kid shampoo, and Buck inhales deeply. “Twenty-minutes of shut-eye, okay?”
Buck spreads the twin sized blanket out over his side of the bed. “You made me tea?”
Eddie rolls his eyes. “Are you or are you not going over every possible worst case scenario in your head right now?”
“Uh.” Buck swallows, sheepish. “Maybe?”
“Exactly.” Eddie crawls into bed next to Buck, picks up Buck’s phone from his pillow, stretches to place it next to the mug, and finally wraps an arm around him. “I just want to help you relax.”
“Even though I’m being totally irrational?” Buck asks, leaning into Eddie’s embrace.
“Yup.” Eddie drops a kiss onto the top of Buck’s head. “I remember Christopher’s first sleepover. I sent that mom so many emails. And then I didn’t sleep at all, I was just waiting for something to go wrong.”
“But he was younger then, and this isn’t his first--”
“It’s your first, though.” Eddie cuts him off. “I know you’ve loved him for a long time, but this is the first night since you moved in that he hasn’t been here.”
Buck sips his tea and grips the blanket a little tighter. “I miss him.”
Eddie chuckles, low and warm. “I know.”
“Do you ever...get used to this feeling?” Buck asks carefully.
“If you mean, will you ever stop worrying about him when you’re not around to protect him, the answer is no,” Eddie shakes his head. “That’s what being a parent is.”
“I’m not a--”
“Evan, you better not have been about to say you’re not a parent,” Eddie says, voice so firm and serious that Buck has no choice but to listen. “You’ve loved Christopher like he was your own since before we were even dating. You take care of him, you worry about him, you always help him when he needs it.”
Buck’s heart feels like it’s about to burst out of his chest. “Of course--of course I love him so much, but you’re his dad. But it’s not like I’m--maybe if we were--but I’m just your boyfriend.”
“Maybe if we were what?” Eddie narrows his eyes. “If we were married?”
Buck’s throat is dry. Sometimes he really hates how easily Eddie can read him. “Uh.”
“Because we could do that,” Eddie continues. “If that’s something you want.”
And now Buck’s brain is short-circuiting. “Is it something you want?”
Eddie bites his lip. “I didn’t think it was, not after Shannon. But…” He sighs. “I told Chimney once that tomorrow isn’t promised to anyone, and I know that you’re it for me, and it’s not like Shannon and I had much of a wedding anyway, so it might be nice to, I don’t know, do it right? If it’s what you want.”
“I do,” Buck answers hastily. “Want that. I already know we’re forever, but I think it would...help. With some of my doubts. If we made it official.”
Eddie beams. “Then I guess we’re getting married.”
Buck can’t quite remember how to breathe. There are so many words he wants to say, but none of them seem right, so he just pulls Eddie into a soft kiss, which Eddie reciprocates eagerly. “I love you so much,” he murmurs when he pulls back. “Of course I want to marry you.”
“I love you so much, too.” Eddie presses a kiss to his temple, and then one to his jaw, and a few to his neck.
They fall into a comfortable silence for a few moments, the only sounds in the room the sounds of soft breaths and Buck sipping on his tea.
“Are you feeling better?” Eddie asks, breaking the silence.
Buck considers this for a moment. There’s still worry gnawing at him, but he feels less silly about it now. And most of him is simply overwhelmed with happiness. “Yeah, yeah I am.”
“Good.” Eddie gives a brisk nod. “Now shut up, drink your leaf water, and go to sleep.”
“Actually, chamomile tea is made with the blossoms of the--”
“Buck.”
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