#which reminds me i wonder how my poll is doing

[rexscanonwife]

Also it's so funny how there's some references to Star Wars in MHA like the train station being called Tatooine and the beach being Dagoba(h) so like...I wonder if it's canonically a movie/show series in this world or if they revere it as something like ancient greek mythology?? So much so that they name landmarks after it?? 😂😂😂

[plutolovesyou]

before you read ▪︎ loose continuation to THIS

ultra loser!ellie x teasing(slightly sadistic tbh)!reader. reads fine as a standalone!! no fr sex, but still nsfw!!! loads of teasing, ellie's shy and flustered (also gave her glasses and piercings muahahah AND HAPPY TRAIL MENTION YAYYY), reader's a little insistent (but it's ok), mentions of masturbation, discussion of sex, REALLY horny making out at the end lol, heavy petting, they almost do it, tiny abby cameo, buildup AS PER USUAL YALL KNOW THE DRILL, kinda cliffhanger ending (its on purpose HAHA), different layout bc i cheated n looked at the poll oops...NGL TS HAD ME SWEATINGGG WRITING IT LMFAO don't think i have ever written something more horny....ok enjoy! (scenario idea graciously donated by the wonderful @fleshunger I LOVE YOUR BRAIN SO MUCH POOKS) + 2.2k wc

apparently both of you missed the professor's class cancellation email on this fateful day… other students showed up too, but they left quickly after seeing it was empty. ellie stayed to catch up on some work, enjoying the silence and typing away on her laptop, which looked like one of those beefy gaming computers.

covered in stickers and the keys changing color, you thought it was interesting she'd lug that thing around campus with her, instead of opting for something light and sleek. and now that leaves you. you had no other plans for the day, and had already mentally prepared yourself for this class, totally unaware it was canceled.

you realized it wasn't a bad idea to copy ellie, and catch up on some of your own work. however you were more intrigued by her, to be totally honest with yourself.

watching her from a distance, she captivated you. she never seemed to notice your stares, too absorbed in her thoughts. you watched her type, efficiently and quickly, pausing only to push her glasses further up her nose with her slim fingers.

the truth is, she's hot. but no one was hearing you out on that, unfortunately. they'd say to you, “what a loser! i don't think i've ever heard her talk.”

you felt overwhelmed by the urge to strike up a real conversation with her—more that simple greetings or coursework questions— and it was the perfect opportunity to do just that. so you got up, sat yourself down in the empty spot right next to her, and put on the most charming grin you could muster up. she abruptly snapped out of her focus, almost flinching at your presence.

“hey! you're ellie, right? whatcha working on?” you got close to her to see, being met with a bunch of hieroglyphic-looking strings of symbols on the screen. woah, smarty-pants. “um, it's just…some project, i dunno. how d’you know my name?”

she finally looked at you, her eyes round, wider than the ufo saucer stickers on the back of her computer. they were so green, the hazel ring reminded you of a polished agate stone. the scattered freckles on her face were so pretty too, you'd never been close enough to her to really take notice. she nervously scanned your features, blotches of pink blush decorating the apples of her plump cheeks.

she was so cute, and noticing her evident shyness flipped a switch inside you, what if you messed with her a little?

you shrugged at her, “just seen you around. you're so mysterious.” you lilt, manipulating your tone to make it smoother on the ears, even containing hints of seduction if you dared.

she blushed a deeper raspberry shade and looked down at her hands, fidgeting with her rings. she was somehow getting more attractive by the second, your heart felt like it was about to burst.

“am i? never thought of it that way, you're funny.” she mumbles, her antsiness obvious. but you didn't wish to let up so soon, you were having a lot more fun flustering her than you'd ever care to admit, even wanting to see just how far you could push her.

“ooh, i love your rings. where did you get em?” “just…places. why are you asking me so many questions?” you sighed and rolled your eyes, “well, ellie. we both don't have anything else to do, gotta pass the time somehow. i wanna talk with you, is that okay?” she took a deep breath and nodded, visibly relaxing. she stretched out her arm to get rid of the tabs on her computer, close it, and put it in her bag, which is when you got a look at her forearm tattoo.

“also i'm obsessed with your tattoo, you have no idea how cool you are, how are girls not all over you?” you question, taking her wrist in your hands and examining the tattoo's intricate line work, tracing your fingertips over the pigment in her skin.

you heard her breathing change in tempo, quickening ever so slightly. but she didn't move her arm away, and let you continue. she took a second to respond. “um. thanks, i guess. i don't really know what you mean.” her voice cracked when she said the last part, igniting a flame inside you, one that you didn't know existed.

your mind wandered, you began wondering what she sounds like when she whimpers. was she really so starved of human contact you could mold her like putty, just with your fingers and tongue? you wanted to find out so badly, wanted to hear how she'd cry your name out if you fucked her into oblivion. was she a squirter or a creamer? you hoped to the heavens above you'd get to find out someday. maybe it was too much to fantasize like this, considering you formally met just now, but you weren't hurting anyone if it all never left the confines of your mind.

you were lucky you hid your own arousal well, nothing out of the ordinary showed on your face whatsoever. ellie wasn't so lucky—to her dismay, but to your delight—everything played out on her delicate features so clearly, it was nothing short of delectable. 

your eyes bore into hers, the intensity of the eye contact making her shiver, and attempt to break it. “ellie, ellie, ellie, may i call you els?” you didn't wait for an answer, and continued, “do you have a girlfriend?” you pouted your lips at her, feigning sadness as if her response was something you didn't already infer.

she was stuttering now, stumbling over her words, making less and less sense as the conversation went on. she was anxiously bouncing her leg, you could see her chest rising and falling, and her face had turned a lovely crimson color, it was so strong, the flush had spread down her neck and reached her ears, making her piercings stand out. good lord. 

“ahem- no, i don't have a girlfriend. actually never have, shocking i know.” she chuckles at her self-deprecating joke, and while her smile was enough to light up a room, you wanted to slap the doubt out of her. or rather, fuck it out of her. 

you exhaled loudly, “hahh, well isn't that a shame. you're so pretty, i'll just have to snatch you up for myself then.” she swallowed audibly, greatly taken aback. “sorry, what?” “oh, don't you know how much people love losers like you? tsk tsk tsk, you're so much hotter than you realize, i mean it, els. look at you! you've got these piercings, this tattoo, you're smarter than this whole class combined, seriously.” 

she just gaped at you, unable to process what she was hearing. no one had ever talked to her like this, it was only something she read about. and coming from you? this ethereal person who starred in all of her most intimate fantasies? she rubbed her eyes roughly, convinced she was hallucinating. her mouth opened and closed dumbly, her voice box failing to produce any sound. but you were affecting her so much, especially because she lusted after you to an extent she could only take to the grave.

flashes of her midnight escapades flickered in her mind, of her shoving her hand down her pants like an animal in heat, orgasming so intensely she'd black out, abusing her hole with nothing but images of you playing in her mind, and your name on her tongue. her cheeks burned with the embarrassment of her wild actions, and she shook her head to clear the thoughts away. 

you groaned and leaned back in your own seat, exclaiming, “god i'm so bored. and pent up, fuck. it's been so long since i had sex…” that was true. in any other situation you'd never say something like that aloud, but because you were alone with the clueless idiot you wanted so carnally, you let it slip. 

“...maybe you should take care of that.” you heard her cough out, her voice coming out strangled. “i could. but that's boring.” you opened your eyes again and smirked devilishly her way, poor girl looked like she was about to go on a trip with the ferryman. 

you grabbed her hand, examining it some more, commenting, “you play guitar, don't you? guitarists are very good with their hands, i will say.” you played with her hand, pressing it into a fist, then extending her middle and ring finger. gosh, what's gotten into you? “i bet you're sooo good.” 

you've never seen a person look more flustered than she did right now in this moment. her voice was impossibly quiet, barely above a whisper, “cut it out.” “okay, fine.”

some beats of silence passed, but a thought crossed your mind. if she really hated this interaction that much, she could have got up and left eons ago, yet she stayed here and endured it all. hmm. you blurted out, “els, have you kissed anyone before?” 

and again she stayed silent, even after you waited patiently for an answer. she kept looking away, her jaw tense. 

you decided to quit the teasing just for a moment, and speak to her gently, genuinely. you shifted to sit a little closer to her and asked, “do you want to?” her gaze locked onto your mouth, she licked her lips, then muttered, “if you're really offering and not just fucking with me, sure-” 

your patience broke and you didn't wait for her to finish her sentence before swiftly leaning forward and connecting your lips with hers, relishing the tiny gasp she made as soon as you did it. she tasted like a dream.

after a split second she kissed you back, it was inexperienced and clumsy, fueled by adrenaline, but she got into a rhythm soon enough. you took the lead and deepened the kiss, absent-mindedly tugging on her bottom lip with your teeth, coaxing eager whimpers out of her, pure music to your ears.

you succumbed to the sensations and increased the pace, your tongue dancing against hers. you felt her hands fumble by your waist, and she pulled you closer to her. your hands clawed at her chest, the beautiful symphony of panting, the wet smacking of your lips colliding, and her uncontrolled moans filled the empty room.

she gripped your waist so tightly, fingertips surely leaving small marks in their wake, you couldn't wait to find them later, and you shamelessly felt up her chest, your thumbs finding her nipples—perky, hard, and poking out through her thin shirt. you caressed and rubbed and squeezed, feeling her jolt under your magical touch.

she was fully whining now. spilling needy, high-pitched sounds, this was better than you could've ever imagined. neither one of you breaking the kiss for even a second, your hand trailed lower and landed on her stomach, slipping under the bottom of her shirt. you felt her defined abs tensing, and the whisper of a happy trail—now it was your turn to moan.

she got even louder and her kisses got sloppier, and you were about to venture inside her waistband before a sudden sound startled you both. 

your phone vibrated aggressively, and with great effort you separated yourself from ellie, long strings of spit connecting you to her still.

she whimpered from the loss of contact, chasing your lips, then huffing and quietly groaning while you took out your phone, her hands not letting go of your waist. when you checked it, it was a message from your friend, abby, just saying: URGENT. COME HERE NOW. ASAP.

fuck her. fuck her and her timing, was all you could think. really, now? you wanted to kill her.

trying to slow your breathing and racing heart, you explained apologetically, “ugh, it's urgent. im so, so sorry ellie, i gotta go.” she stared at you, speechless, but nodded meekly, reluctantly retracting her arms. you didn't want to leave, and stayed gazing at her for a little longer, and brushed a loose strand of soft hair out of her face. what a cutie, she looked all disheveled and dazed. you were about to look for a paper to scribble down your number to keep in touch, until your phone buzzed again, and started ringing with abby's repeated attempts to get ahold of you. couldn't she wait a minute?

you gave ellie one last devastated look, getting up and rushing out of the classroom before abby called you another seventeen times. 

ellie was left in the classroom, reeling from the encounter and what it had turned into. she was utterly bewildered at the events that transpired, her blood rushing in her ears, mind spinning, lips still puffy, glasses fogged over, hands trembling, and of course a sticky, uncomfortable damp spot in her boxers. she leaned forward to rest her head on the desk in front of her on top of crossed arms, to take a moment to cool down before escaping back to her place. 

“holy shit.” 

im horny🧍‍♂️just like ellie after that. as soon as she got home, u best believe she came so hard she saw literal angels and deities LMFAOO (this is my favorite thing ive ever written gawdDAYUM)

yall who wanted more, hope this suffices as a continuation! @stonerzdaze420692 @womenlvrrr

[wondeurwall]

AUTHOR'S NOTE. here's the other preview for the rafayel fic that i said i would post. tysm for the notes on all my previous ones!! i appreciate it 🥺💕💕 no particular warnings for this, so it's fine to interact with. but, i still do want to make the reminder that the fic will eventually be nsfw 🔞

currently 15k with it... definitely a slow burn. i'm a little worried that it might not be all that interesting because of how long it's getting to be, which is totally fine too. i don't expect it to be for some. feel good experience for me then 😆 💕 i'll make another poll about posting other previews over the week!

WARNINGS. none for this part. unless... mutual feelings? kiss?

“Then, how about I call you… sweetheart?” Rafayel gently takes your face into his hands, rubs his thumbs over the apples of your cheeks. He leans in little by little, gives the anticipation something worthwhile for, and until his breath is long drawn-out above yours, you hold it in absently. You feel his warmth once, then again. Soft, tender kisses. “Is that better?” 

You breathe out, humming in approval. 

“Baby?”

He kisses the tip of your nose, and then brushes his own against yours. Back and forth, back and forth. He takes his time with it. Thoughtful and loving.

“Cutie?”

His lips find the bridge of your nose. A gentle peck between your brows. He’s moving over to your left eye, and you flutter both closed, smiling, waiting to feel his sign of affection. One kiss, then another on your right. The sensation tickles, makes you feel a bit intoxicated too. Giddy and light-headed, an out-of-body experience, it’s almost as if you’re on top of cotton candy clouds. The flavor is sweeter than honey. You wish you could somehow gather it, save it by pouring it inside a bottle and get drunk off of it every night. 

The happiness on your face and the laughing whispers, they make Rafayel’s heart swell.

“Beautiful?” 

Beautiful. Absolutely, unequivocally beautiful. How are you even possible?

As his thumb swipes your lower lip, your mouth parts in nervous excitement. He’s so close now; you can taste the air, how desire fills it completely, standing just an inch away. A single step forward, and it’ll be yours, yours, yours.

“Can I?”

Rafayel. Rafayel. Everything is Rafayel and you begin to shake. God only knows just how badly you need to close this distance. You want it gone. You want him.

You murmur, “Kiss me. Please.”

It feels risky, feels scary even to ask him. But, you’re all in, here and now, and when his lips finally meet yours, sweet and slow, the little thing in your chest beats once. 

It stops moving. 

Then, it restarts. 

Blood pumping in the opposite direction, you suddenly know what it feels like to be alive. You can’t explain it – you’ve reached a time and space no one else has brought you before. Except for him. You know this. It resembles home. It is home. It’s painful. It’s liberation. You’ve been wanting this for so long and it’s only now that you realize you’ve been deprived of it, of you and him like this. 

You’re dying. You’re reviving. The desperation is heavy in your bones, heavy in your mind, and it doesn’t seem like it’s a coincidence everything about this moment fits together, as if it belonged here in the first place. 

Just as Rafayel pulls back, a reluctance washes over you. A staggering intensity like no other. Fire in your chest, it spreads aggressively. It burns, it burns, and you burn up – lungs are filling with smoke, and you need the air from him again. You need more. The thought drifts in your head, though your body is moving before you can say anything. Your hand reaches for his, guiding him back into your direction as you tip forward, chasing after his lips.

You plead, “Don’t–” 

You hear him gasp, then he’s breathing a bit harder, trembling inhales and exhales, at your desperation. There’s a brief wonder if he should give into his personal desires now. He thinks it wouldn’t hurt to; can’t find any reason that tells him otherwise, so it shouldn’t hurt. It shouldn’t hurt, he repeats, not when you’re looking at him as if he holds the secret of the universe somewhere in his eyes. 

“Don’t stop yet, please.” 

Not when you sound like that. 

He’s not forcing you, he has to remind himself. You want this. It’s so obvious. Painfully obvious. He’s in over his head by the turn of events and, truthfully, it brings a bit of fear in him, but he refuses to leave you feeling unwanted if he doesn’t make up his mind at this moment. How can he do that? Make you feel unwanted?

“Is that what you want?” he asks. The extra affirmation is a need. Will not go until you can crush that seed of doubt. 

“Yes, yes, yes, Raf–” you bite your lower lip, frustration clawing at your throat. The knot of emotions inside there spills out in waves, currents wild and twisting in a way that mimics a hurricane over the ocean. It’s too hard to speak, to catch your breath. “I want it. Please, don’t leave me like this, Rafayel.” 

You don’t know it – not yet, or perhaps, never – but you have unimaginable power over him. Anyone would be scared. Not Rafayel. He can never deny you because doing that would mean pushing you further away than you already are. Close, so close, yet so far. Command him because you want him and no one else. Take everything that he has because you won’t settle for anything less. You can have it all – please, please, just say it. 

He’s desperate to know that you need him just as much as he needs you. 

You beg, “Rafayel.”

“Shh, I wouldn’t dream of it,” he whispers. He will never leave you.

Rafayel kisses you again, deeply, with a love so fierce. The fire is urgent and all-consuming, will never get enough until smoke clouds the air and the world is bled dry, until you and him are left to give your hearts to each other without fear. And, even then, his love will remain boundless and insatiable. 

He has his hands buried into your hair, fists full so you can’t escape. He is all that you have. Mouth crushing down onto yours, he does this with the hope to sear himself into your memory permanently. Maybe, with this, you won’t forget him. His lips are hard-pressed, but they melt, turn a bit softer, then deeper, so much deeper. Breathe his soul and know that this kiss isn’t just a kiss. Taste his addiction, his devotion; his feelings that will never know what it’s like to abandon. His vow to you. 

Every year that’s gone by has been a year worth waiting. 

When you gasp into his mouth, your voice echoes into his ears; it makes Rafayel sensitive, an induced high that forces his body to ache and shudder. Face flushed, eyes hazy, he’s becoming feverish. He’s pulling away again, only barely, as the sensitivity peels his voice raw. What he tells you comes so faintly, slips by you fast and low by mistake: “You’re everything.” 

He leans in one more time, lets his lips stay a little longer.

© 2024 wondeurwall ☆ all rights reserved. please don't repost as your own, modify or translate on here and on other platforms. reblogs & likes are appreciated! ♡

[devourable]

☾ the monster

sfw | tws : teratophilia, yandere behavior/thoughts, kidnapping?

yandere monster x gn reader! only pronoun for reader used is 'you'

the last of my male yanderes from the poll,, finally <3 tysm to my friend for helping me w this :,) this one goes out to all my monster lovers out there (aka me). his name isn't used in this fic but hes named mykolas!

also!! after this fic i'll be going on a short hiatus! i have to work a lot this week and won't have time/energy to write or draw. but i will still respond to messages and will answer asks when i return (or during the down time i do have if i can). i'll see you all soon! <3

the beast was lonely. he always had been, and figured he always would be.

he learned long ago that he wasn't something that people cared for. every attempt to interact with civilization was met with fear and vitriol, harsh reminders that he wasn't allowed to enjoy the company of others. every strange happening, every fool that went missing, every incident that the townsfolk couldn't explain was always blamed on him.

even the sign outside of his forest said it ; "keep away! the beast of rochshire wood lurks!". no one would dare to step foot in his domain.

so the day he discovered you in his woods, things changed.

what were you doing there, he wondered? you looked so content, so unafraid to be in his forest as you traveled from bush to bush, picking berries and uprooting a few edible plants to tuck them away in the basket you were carrying. did you not see the signs? weren’t you afraid?

despite his questions about your presence there, something drew the beast to you. he didn't feel the urge to hide himself away like he usually would when a human stumbled into his home. you… he felt you were different. you must’ve been unlike the others if you could just come along so casually like this.

the foliage he stood in rustled as he slowly approached you. somehow, you didn’t notice or feel his eyes on you despite how intensely he was observing you and continued with your activities at first. it wasn't until a stick loudly snapped under his step thay your head snapped in his direction.

your eyes widened as you locked them with the glowing white gaze of the hulking beast before you. he was massive! so big that the large antlers atop his head brushed against the branches above him. and the pitch black fur that the... thing was covered in did nothing but make it almost seem like an amorphous mass of muscle. he was unlike anything you'd ever seen before.

you wanted to be scared. you wanted to scream and run away, get out of the forest and return to the safety of your home. the rumors, the signs — they were all true! they weren't a joke like you assumed! but despite your brain screaming at you to get out of there, you just didn't. you were frozen in place, unable to move or even react as the creature slowly leaned down to you and...

sniffed you?

the strange chuffing sound caught you off guard, baffling you out of your frozen state. you blinked a few times and realized — it was definitely sniffing you. and it pulled away right after, taking a step or two back.

the monster was so desperate to not look like a threat to you. you were so lovely, you seemed so sweet, and you smelled nice! he didn't want to scare you away! with a sort of chirping noise, he laid his head to the ground in a bid to show you that he was harmless.

curiosity got the better of you. possibly against your better judgement, you took a step toward the beast. he lifted his head slightly as you slowly pressed your hand to what you could only assume was the creature's forehead. and sure enough, this earned a small trill from him.

you couldn't help the small laugh falling from your lips, which promptly got his massive tail wagging. you weren't scared! you were touching him! and it wasn't to hurt him! his heart was pounding so much that he practically vibrated with excitement. he sat back — unintentionally startling you, but thankfully not driving you away.

you tilted your head, slowly, to the left. the creature did the same, its massive antlers brushing against the branches over its head. you tilted your head to the right, and it followed suit. you raised a hand and sheepishly waved to the creature, and to your surprise, it waved back!

that was all he need to fall completely head over heels for you.

you were oblivious to his adoration for you, but you definitely weren't hating your time with him. he wasn't nearly as bad as the village made him out to be! so you didn't notice the time flying by as the monster herded you deeper into the forest (away from the way out), guiding you to the bushes with the best berries and the biggest patches of edible foliage. he seemed so happy to have company, it was so easy to convince yourself to stay longer.

every time you tried to go into a direction he didn't want you going in, he'd pick you up and set you back down in the way he wanted you to go. and you let him. you didn't have very much of a choice in the matter, but it was okay! so what if the sun was starting to set? he was filling your basket — you wouldn't have to shop for days after this. and every time you made even the slightest suggestion of having to go, he gave you those big, glowing puppy eyes that you just couldn't disappoint.

just a few more minutes and you'd leave, you told yourself. you said it even after your basket and pockets were well beyond their capacity. you said it when the shadows started growing and the sky grew even darker. you said it until the moon was overhead, and the path out of the forest was too obscured for you to find it again...

when you looked at the beast again, he offered you his hand. and again, possibly against your better judgement, you took it.

it was dangerous to be alone in the forest, didn't you know? but there was nothing to worry about. the monster would make sure nothing — no one — took you from the safety of his presence.

you weren't safe anywhere that wasn't by his side.

please reblog to support me!

[didyougaming]

Hi, gamers. I know the results of the Sandwich Poll have been gnawing at you. So many people wondering whether they answered correctly, which as a reminder is a very important factor in determining which afterlife you end up in when you die. Please understand that I needed a lot of time to internally process these poll results and also that I've been kinda busy/tired. But the people need to know, so here we go.

In total, we received 372 responses. I also spent a lot of my weekend annoying anyone who would listen to me in person about these questions, but I didn't write those answers down.

Question 1 was fairly non-controversial, as it should be. It is worth noting that 3.2% of respondents chose to write-in an answer, and most of these write-in answers were what scientists would call "bad" and "not really useful." So you can assume a 3.2% margin of error on everything in this survey. That's how statistics works.

Question 2 is where we see a real divide. Most respondents consider a sandwich cut into two separate but equal pieces to be one sandwich. This is a real shame, because it's the wrong answer. But let's not get ahead of ourselves.

Question 3 considers whether one piece of bread cut in half and used for sandwich-making results in a sandwich, and surprisingly the majority of respondents do consider this to be one sandwich. This is really interesting, because despite ending up with functionally and aesthetically the same result as one of the pieces of the sandwich from question 2, a significant number of respondents believe the results to be inherently different. I wish there was a way to better track how much overlap there was for those two seemingly contradictory answers, but the big Sheets page Google Docs is daunting and I don't feel like figuring out how to parse that data, so we just need to accept that we'll never have that exact number. That's how statistics works.

Question 4 mostly just cements the findings of the previous two questions. I do want to point out the one person who answered "who the fuck does this". Sandwich shops do this. Go to a sandwich shop for once in your life and really watch them do their work. Open your eyes.

Question 5 did not get me a lot of useful data, as it turns out having a question that only allowed for write-in answers was a bad idea. However, there are more or less two camps for people who really took these questions seriously and gave it their all. The first school of thought suggests that intent is the most important factor, and if you deem what you've made to be a sandwich, it's a sandwich. While I appreciate the critical thinking on display here, I believe in the other school of thought, which is that when you put ingredients between two breads that's a sandwich, baby. There is a sub-school of thought here that requires those two pieces to be whole pieces, but that's wrong.

One question that I should have included in the survey I think proves my point. If you order a sandwich platter from a deli and they use a single really long piece of bread (think like a several foot long hero) into multiple sections, you would say that you have sandwiches, plural. If you wanted to grab one, you wouldn't say "I'm going to grab a 64th of a sandwich" because you would sound deranged. Despite being parts of a larger whole, they are still ingredients between pieces of bread, and thus fit the definition of "sandwich."

Anyway, thank you for coming on this non-gaming detour with me. It was extremely important that I prove a friend wrong on this topic, and even though I don't think I did that and I think he's choosing to double down on his incorrect opinions, I'm still choosing to spin this as a personal and moral victory. New actual DidYouGamings will come out as soon as I discover any new facts about video games (right now there's only a couple hundred facts about video games at all and I've basically covered all of them.)

[roofermadness]

this article (skip paywall link) is a fucking trip. i understand humans better and worse than before.

the thesis: some people not only don't care about politics; they don't care about facts. to a certain subset of people, "no thoughts; just vibes" is a way of life. take, for example, the opening anecdote about a woman in georgia who posted a basic fact check on a friend's facebook post that alleged that chili's and other restaurant chains are on their deathbeds. we've all seen some stupid misinformation, but what sent chills down my spine was a comment from the friend who posted the rumor (bolding mine):

“I love Monica,” he told me. “But I think Monica goes directly to sources of information.” This, he suggested, was not the right approach. “Use common sense,” he went on.

how on earth, i wondered, could this guy consider seeking out information a character flaw?!

then i saw this terrifying little nugget from a poli sci prof who studied low-info voters (defined by someone who couldn't answer two out of three very basic civics questions):

Low-information voters, he found, are more likely to embrace stereotypes of other groups, and less likely to fact-check claims made by politicians. [...] He came across a metric in psychology called the “need for cognition” scale. “A question that really caught my attention on the scale is an agree or disagree: ‘Thinking is not my idea of fun,’ ” Fording recalled. He and a colleague ran a study to see whether agreement with the statement correlated with support for Trump. It did.

(it's crucial to note, as fording does in the next paragraph, that this doesn't mean they're stupid, just that they don't get much pleasure out of learning new things. the article also cites examples of how this phenomenon can be subject-specific and position-agnostic. it also isn't limited to conservatives, as demonstrated frequently on this piss-on-the-poor website.)

but the article reminded me of the 2016 episode of this american life (the whole thing is worth a listen; it's a harbinger of what we are seeing play out eight years later) in which ira glass interviews his obama-hating uncle. ira debunks and fact-checks his uncle's stream of misinformation and plain lies, but provable facts prove uncompelling to him. this is the pithiest example:

Uncle Lenny: This guy-- he wants to have one country of North America, which is composed of Canada, the United States, and part of Mexico, if not all of Mexico. That's why the existing laws, which dictate that border trespassers shall be deported, he chooses to ignore. Ira Glass: Well, no, he actually deported 2.5 million people. More than any other president. Uncle Lenny: I don't believe that, Ira, for one minute. I don't believe that.

ira glass's conclusion, in his words: "facts do not have a fighting chance against this right-wing fable."

confirmation bias makes sense to me. not seeking out information from lack of interest makes sense to me. falling prey to misconceptions widely accepted in your community makes sense to me. what i find incomprehensible is sheer incuriosity. not only do some people lack critical thinking skills; they find thinking actively unpleasant.

so yeah. apparently some folks run on no thoughts, just vibes. not sure whether i feel more enlightened or depressed.

[loving-n0t-heyting]

Hi! So, seeing you in my notes reminded me that I meant to ask you about that Instrumentality poll. Being as I am tumblr user 人類補完計画, I have, asyoumightimagine, a lot of interest in the topic, and I'd be very curious to hear *your* thoughts on Shinji's choice - in part because you mentioned in the tags that you were wondering whether your take aligned with the consensus view, but also because I feel like you're among the most distinctive & intellectually honest philosophical voices I've encountered on here, and I do wonder how your faith, along with your overall view on things, influences your take(s) re:EoE.

I was going to wait until the poll finally closed but i think its been plateauing for a couple of days now anyway so i might as well. This is all going to be pretty vague and mysticism-y ofc, especially given the vagueness and mysticism of the source material itself, and im going off of memory on top of that (i am not putting myself thru the emotional hurdle of rewatching EoE just for a post, sorry)

So, first off, my interpretation of shinjis ultimate choice is to reject instrumentality for all of humanity, to retain our ATFs and our individuality. And i lean towards thinking this was a mistake, on his part. I sometimes see ppl suggest that he offered everyone a choice to either join or refuse instrumentality, but i tend to think this is just projection; idr anything in the text to clearly support this

Im not really sure how to go about arguing for this position directly, beyond rebutting objections. To the extent we are given a clear explanation of what an ATF is, it is smth like the secrecy of our own thoughts and desires and personality; ie, others ignorance of those things. Ignorance is a terrible thing, just generally, in itself! Like impotence. Its terrible in proportion to the importance/value of the things one is ignorant of, and ppl are about the most valuable things there are. Thats much of whats so bad about death, which is why it makes perfect sense the dead get to join in HI as well. So, putting it all together, the presence of ATFs is a terrible imposition, and their removal thru HI is a great blessing, maybe even the greatest possible blessing. And this shows itself in the end of strife and discord and the beginning of real unity of spirit and will, but its already present in the mere dissolution of interpersonal ignorance

The narrative itself frames this as an erasure of individuality, but im not sure how to understand this. Is the idea supposed to be that we would not survive the loss of our ATFs? Im not sure thats even intelligible: the loss of our ATFs is just the lifting of certain kinds of ignorance or, in other words, the instilling of certain kinds of knowledge. Knowledge in whom? In those undergoing human instrumentality. So clearly we survive HI, if it involves us coming into knowledge, and thus being around to know these things. Is this supposed to mean our distinctive contributions to the diversity of human experience etc would all be destroyed in favour of some uniform replacement? I dont see why that would be necessary; we can certainly imagine ways ppls varying idiosyncratic quirks can all "make it into" some sufficiently rich collaborative work. Why should HI not be the same? I suppose the fact it involves everyones bodies into a homogeneous sea of yellow goop speaks against this, but my inclination is to read this as a sort of pupal stage from which a mature instrumentalised humanity can emerge. Tho thats admittedly a bit of a reach

Theres yet another negative interpretation of the "destruction of individuality" i sometimes hear: that it would somehow rob us each of our agency and ability to shape the world in accord with our desires and beliefs. This goes along with a worry that the inauguration of HI would necessarily be a violation of consent and mental autonomy, which strikes me as misguided for much the same reason. Our ignorance of one another is not an individual condition of oneself in particular one can opt in or out of irrespective of the choices of others; if my not being able to retsin my ATF is a violation of my "autonomy", why is my retaining my ATF not in turn a violation of the autonomy of the others being thereby kept ignorant of my deepest self? Mutual ignorance of one anothers mental states (including that very ignorance) is in no interesting way reducible to the ignorant subjects each having certain "individual" or "intrinsic" or "internal" states that can individually and unilaterally be shifted without affecting those of the others; it is an "external" relation. So thinking about HI in terms of individual, unilaterally revocable consent is confused; the fact it is changing is irreducibly collective, and thus consent to it and only be given or refused collectively if at all. Hopefully thats not too opaque

This reply feeds into my answer to the worry about the dilution of ones agency and control over the world. This objection makes sense against a background view on which, for an agent A to control the answer to a question Q and a distinct agent A* to control the answer to a question Q*, Q and Q* must be modally independent: any answer to the latter must be compossible with any answer to the former. Or that, if this isnt true, this is bc As control over Q or A*s over Q* must be only "limited" or "partial" or w/e. My rejection of this assumption (which is i think what lies behind the last objection about autonomy) is probably my deepest, most abstract anti-liberal commitment. Its a conception of control or freedom that i think ultimately requires a debilitatingly narrow view of what full freedom could look like, or of what facts can amount to states of a person. (For example, i think it prolly requires you to say that knowing that the sun rises, a property entailing the "external" fact that the sun rises, is not actually a state of a person, in some important sense, rather than smth like a conjunction of a state of a person and a state of the horizon/sun.) But going all the way into this would probably take a lengthy book; mb i will try to work it out slightly more precisely at some point tho

You asked how my feeling about EoE connect with my faith, and broader view of the world. This illiberal assumption is close to the heart of it. I am always tempted in this context to quote marxs comments in the 1848 manuscripts about the whole of nature being the "inorganic body of man", and i dont think im alone in seeing connections between those passages and remarks like pauls about the mystical body of the church ("So we, being many, are one body in Christ, and every one members one of another." Now there is smth for mereologists to chew on!!) And this is a trend you see elsewhere in the Christian tradition, like dantes description of the celestial eagle in paradiso xviii-xx. I was surprised, when talking to an atheist friend about my tentative support for HI, that they said my christianity made sense of my disagreement with them about this point; not bc i dont think theres a connection but bc idt of these emphases on the unity of the mystical body as particularly prominent in outsiders impressions of Christian belief

Anyway, hopefully that was at least somewhat illuminating. Thx for the kind words ^^

[cuephrase]

from the questionnaire:

are there any results that really surprised you or that you didn't expect?

oooooh good question!! for me personally, no, not really? at least nothing that automatically comes to mind, so yk, don't quote me on that if i share data later and say "this surprised me/i didn't expect this!!" lmao

ummmm, hmmm. well actually okay, so i did expect Tim to be the Most Disliked Robin, but not by such a margin, if that makes sense? more like, logically one of them was going to be the most disliked even if only like 10 people disliked a Robin and my bet was that Tim would have the most votes, by process of elimination/other hypotheses. i wasn't upset by the results, if you've seen the post you know i was incredibly entertained.

there were definitely some results that were a relief? like they aligned with my personal predictions, but it was still really nice to see them.

oh, something that did surprise me was the amount of commentary i got on batcest!! there is zero discussion of shipping in the questionnaire, which is mainly why i wasn't expecting so much commentary, and there's not really a whole lot of ship discussion apart from batcest stuff that i remember- i did think i might get a couple mentions of it but i got a lot more than a couple lmao.

in favor of and against, to be clear, and to be even clearer to anyone reading- this is not an invitation to share your thoughts about batcest with me, i truly do not care. not to be rude, either, like i don't care if you love it or hate it, i just have zero interest in discussing it since a) my blog is mostly gen and b) i don't see any benefits in engaging in discourse about batcest 🫶

on the individual response level, there were some things that surprised me in isolation, but made perfect sense in the context of the responder's answers, like for instance one person said they didn't see Dick as brothers with any of the boy Robins except for Damian, because "he doesn’t really interact with a lot of the other robins in canon", that being said, the only eras they said they read were pre-crisis and rebirth. makes a lot more sense in that context. like i was thrown for a loop, but then i saw the full picture and i was like, "oh. okay."

let this be your daily reminder that the statement "i read comics" means basically nothing lmao. and i don't mean that as a dig at that responder, not at all, just that if you're someone who reads comics you cannot assume that someone else also reading comics means that you guys will be on the same wavelength. not because canon is nebulous and unknowable imo, but just because there's a lot of it!!

also!! a decent amount of people said i was brave?? that freaked me out a little, because i hadn't really...i didn't think i was stepping into shit, okay? in hindsight, i realize that that was naive of me, but idk. i wasn't thinking about the results in that way, and i also really didn't think i was going to get much interaction either- i was floored by the engagement the questionnaire got. but yeah, idk, i was just genuinely curious to see if my theory had any weight, i wasn't thinking about the broader implications of what the data might reveal. whoops.

and here's what surprised my wonderful data-crunchers:

@chinajousama: Hmm, I think one thing that did surprise me was how little the types of Robin media actually impacted the results [of the Most Disliked Robin]. Aside from that pocket of Jason hate from the post-Crisis fans, everyone was remarkably consistent. Also, it wasn't really a surprise, but it was extremely funny to see how big the gap between tim and literally anyone else was, dislike wise.

(we got an ask about if the media/eras consumed impacted which Robins were disliked, so that math has been done, but i haven't shared the results yet, sorry!!)

@tevyaa: Lots! Off the top of my head: - I was sure that the clear winner of the most disliked Robin poll would be Damian. He's the only one I've ever really seen hate for - probably because I entered fandom through Tim-centric whump fic 😂. I was shocked that it's actually Tim who the fandom is most annoyed with. - I was surprised how much of the fandom does actually read comics! I would have guesstimated that the comics/non-comics fans were something like 50/50, and was shocked to find out that only 15% of fandom doesn't read comics (and only about 4% doesn't interact with canon at all, including comics/ games/ animation)

(dw, we haven't released any data apart from the MDR yet, but you'll be able to see the breakdown of comics read/canon interaction eventually!!)

ty for the ask, anon!! i hope you enjoyed the answer!!

[depression-napping]

As someone with a chronic condition, I find Vincent to be especially relatable and honestly such a relief as a character.

I’m curious how many other Vincent fans also feel this way. If you feel comfortable, you can vote in the poll.

Edit: Chronic depression/anxiety/ADHD count as a chronic condition. It can be mental or emotional, not just physical pain.

My personal feelings under the cut.

When I first fell in love with him, I didn’t have a chronic condition yet, but his entry into my life rather coincided with the onset of it and shaped how I felt about it.

For many years, I blamed myself for my condition (which I later learned is genetic, incurable, and worsens with age), wondering what was wrong with me and why I couldn’t just get over it. I felt that I had missed so many opportunities, failed to accomplish countless goals, because I had to spend so much time isolated in a dark, quiet room to avoid making my migraines worse, recovering from the pain and side effects of the medication. Unable to do anything but wait for it to be over. (Edit: Depression/anxiety/mood swings are also part of my condition, it’s not just physical pain!)

So many protagonists are exhausting tropes of “never give up!!!!” and ridiculous heroism.

But there is often the depressing reality of the situation where difficult things happen and they can’t be changed, no matter what you do. You just have to deal with it. Or sometimes the pain is so great, you can’t deal with it. Sometimes your only realistic option is to take a 30 year depression nap.

I feel like he would understand constant pain and exhaustion because it’s his reality, too. He wouldn’t be like, just get over it, it’s all in your head. Even though my pain is nothing compared to what he has been through, I feel like he would just understand.

He is honestly my reminder that this is/was not a waste of time. Resting is a necessary part of healing and staying in balance, especially when your body sometimes feels like your enemy. And I should not have to apologize for it.

[the-24-7-lawlu-library]

Poll Vote Fluff

Sorry everyone for being late. Was fighting a mean headache. I hope you all had a great weekend and wish you a wonderful week <3

A Legend about True Love by Katia_Anyway (G)

The Prince of the Kingdom, Luffy, has spent his whole life locked up in the Castle, his Grandfather the King insisting that the world outside was too dangerous. But the Prince is curious and adventurous, he wants to go explore, even if that means having to sneak out alone. But once outside, he gets lost, and needs the help of a very beautiful Witch named Trafalgar Law.

No Stranger to Crazy by Purplehairedwonder (G)

The Straw Hats arrive on an island to discover not only that the Hearts are already there, but there is also a winter festival happening. Law doesn’t have the best memories with winter islands or festivals, so Luffy is determined to make some good ones with him.

You can calm me down by Sakuya_Serenity_Kira (G)

After Luffy has beaten Kaido devastatingly, his fighting spirit is unbroken. He wants, he needs more. In this intoxication, he loses control of his new abilities. Can someone stop him? But who? And how? After all, Luffy is now. . . a god.

A Sinner's Pledge by bimarian (T)

This one little incident this morning just reminded him of the promise that he wanted to make and of the letter that he said he would have to eventually write. The Surgeon takes a moment to glance between his sleeping fiancé and the papers on his lap before he finally writes a greeting on the scented paper. ‘Hey, Ace-ya.’  In which Luffy wakes up from a nightmare—and Law finally writes a letter to make one little promise to Ace.

Midnight by Chenziee (T)

Luffy really wanted to celebrate the end of the year with his friends and family but with his arm injured, strict orders of no partying, and his roommate on his heels, it got really damn hard to sneak out.

Are You Bananas by Plume8now (G)

Usopp gives Luffy an idea, and now, Luffy can't get it off his mind. Of course, he won't wait until tomorrow to do it. And nothing can stop Monkey D. Luffy.

The Mysterious Case of the Hiccups. by ClementineJuicebox, SailorHeichou (G)

-hic- The first hiccup that started it all.

Show me what love is all about by aloas (T)

If Law didn’t know how useless Luffy is when it comes to making plans, he would be complimenting Luffy’s mastermind for always knowing just the right way or the right time to catch Law unguarded. But Law knows that is not the case. So, he curses at the universe. Or fate. Or whatever deity out there that is constantly plotting for Luffy to find Law. (Or the one where Law learns a thing or two about love.)

Answer the Question by Heart_Core (T)

Law’s birthday celebration hadn’t gone the way Luffy expected too, but he was grateful nonetheless.

Our Hearts, Made Whole in Each Other by Purplehairedwonder (G)

Luffy cupped Law’s cheek with his hand, softly grazing his thumb over a yellowing bruise. “Torao is so pretty,” he said quietly, a note of awe in his voice. Law flushed. “Torao’s heart is beating so fast.” “Yeah,” Law agreed, swallowing. “It is.” Luffy’s, despite a few flutters, was beating steadily in Law’s chest. Law, on the other hand, felt pinned to the spot, one hand holding Kikoku and the other in Luffy’s grip. “You should stay.” Law blinked. “What?” “You should stay,” Luffy repeated. “On the Sunny. With me." Written for 10 Days of LawLu 2023 Day 10: Confessions.

Always See the Daylight by Purplehairedwonder (G)

“Why did you want to see my room?” Law asked, both curious and a bit apprehensive at what the response might be. “Because it’s yours!” Luffy said immediately, sitting up quickly. Luffy looked as though the answer had been obvious. For Law, however, that explained exactly nothing. “What—” Luffy looked around, his expression softening in a way that made Law fidgety. “It’s very Torao,” he decided. Written for LawLu Week 2022. Day 5 Prompt: Captain's quarters

Coming Home (To Breathe Again, To Start Again) by Purplehairedwonder (G)

Law had a… complicated relationship with the concept of home. But here on the beach of Wano with Luffy looking at him with such fondness that Law wanted to squirm, he thought that maybe home could be another person.

-Mod Raiya

[nativeofsumeru]

My lovely Kistune (Yae Miko x kistune!reader

A/N: This is from the polls I made a while ago, I'm finally delivering. I'm going to do my best to keep it gender neutral.

(NOT PROOFREAD)

~~

"My love, why do you continue to stare at the sakura at this time in the evening?" Yae Miko, love of your life, Lady Guuji of the Grand Narukami Shrine, took a seat next to you holding sake. "They're lovely this time of year." The fall breeze stirred a few petals in the direction of your hand. "Reminds me of home." You reminisced the past, days with the youkai, as a young kistune. "Darling, you know things can't stay the same forever. Time is inevitable, things have to change." She said, taking a sip of her sake. Your ear flicked as you stared at the shrine maidens carrying on with their business down below. You loved your perch atop the shrine building facing the Sacred Sakura. It was your favorite view...After staring at Yae, you decided to scratch that thought. "A kistune can hope." You replied sadly. "I miss them." She frowned. Today was a special day for your clan, however it was centuries ago since the last time you were able to celebrate it. "It's not too late you know," She started. "We could always start the celebrations now if you'd like." You looked over at her. Damn she was gorgeous in the light of the sunset. She glowed in the fading warm rays. "Oh Lady Guuji, how I do love you." She smiled softly at you. "It's about time you do. I didn't spend all these centuries with you for nothing, my dear." She pointed her nose towards the sky in pride. "Tell me my lovely kistune, which celebration would you like to partake in first?" She questioned. You felt a smile tugging at your lips. ~~

Bonus Ending: "You want me to do what?" Ei asked her best friend curiously. "It's not that hard of a task Ei." Yae turned her head to gaze in your direction. "I simply want them to feel more at home." Ei nodded in understanding. "A national holiday it is." Ei declared. Yae couldn't help but beam with happiness. "Wonderful! (Y/N)!" You pause your conversation with the Tenshukaku guard. "Yes?" "Guess what I just did." She smirked. She was going to be sure you wouldn't be able to thank her enough.

[crescentroscs]

naruto dash simulator

🍂 comrademadara Follow

SANDAIME DOWN 🦀🦀🦀

🔥 shinobifurious Follow

reminder that sarutobi hiruzen was a WAR HERO who should be remembered as such :)

👘 yukata-yuri Follow

reminder that sarutobi hiruzen was a LITTLE BITCH and that we should all PISS on his GRAVE

4,501 notes

👅 trueartisanexplosion Follow

@tobi this sake isn't doing shit get ur ryō ready

👅 trueartisanexplosion Follow

i wnr himn to imroreganate mpe

63,399 notes

💜 rinnegone Follow

she village on my hidden until i leave

💜 rinnegone Follow

easy website

17,280 notes

🌊 7swordswag

93 notes

🍥 orangehokage Follow

save me instant cup ramen

🍥 orangehokage Follow

instant cup ramen

🍥 orangehokage Follow

instant cup ramen... save me..

7 notes

☀️ sandkaze Follow

regardless of any nepotism that may have been involved, I just think it’s messed up that they let a FOURTEEN YEAR OLD become kazekage. not to mention other villages could take it as a sign of weakness that the most powerful shinobi we have is so young

🦝 goatedgaara Follow

idk wasn’t the yodaime mizukage really young?

⚡️ codenamekage Follow

lol you’re clearly new to kageblr. that rumors been debunked for ages, the guy was just super short

kuna1-deactivated

feels like they’re just letting anyone be a kage these days. how could tsunade be the best choice for hokage when jiraiya is clearly superior in strength 🙄

🌸 blossom-princess Follow

12 Butsuma Senju Ave, Konohagakure, LOF 118211

[This post went to heaven.]

🐸 jiraiya-updates Follow

Update on the cease and desist order from Konoha:

This blog will be deleted in 48 hours. We never considered the harm our hyperfixation could have on Konoha's national security, and for that we are sincerely sorry, both to Jiraiya and the residents of Konoha. For those wonderful people who have expressed concern for the mod team, the legal case is still ongoing but right now it's looking like a fine.

More information on the case, the ANBU incident and the situation with @orochimarupdates can be found below the cut.

Keep Reading

1,622 notes

🎎 fyeahhistory Follow

The Valley of the End

These statues were constructed by artist and stonemason Hikaru Aburame in 1737 KY. Commissioned by the Shodaime Hokage Hashirama Senju, the statues depict Senju and his longtime ally and rival Madara Uchiha. Uchiha and Senju were responsible for the Uchiha-Senju Alliance which founded the Hidden Leaf Village and put an end to the Warring States period. The monument, which potrays the two opposite each other forming the confrontation sign, was constructed in the valley where Uchiha lost his life to Senju during their battle a year prior.

Photo taken by Ami Sugiyama

6,410 notes

[bump1nthen1ght]

Out of The Woods (Epilogue: Part 2)

Pairing: M! Werewolf x Fem!Reader

Genre: Fluff, Domestic Life, Established Relationship

Warnings: None

Word Count: 1797 words

Summary: Nothing says love better then an impromptu living room dance party

(AKA a fun snippet of you and Heath's life)

A/N: The fluffy piece won second in the poll and I already has this in the works so I hope y'all enjoy!!

ALSO

Recommended listening: Bet On It from High School Musical 2

(which if you haven't seen this scene, do yourself a favor and watch it lol)

In a weird way, Heath being a werewolf didn’t come up too often in your house.

It was probably because many of his wolf traits had become normal to your everyday routine. His long hair, his shaggy tail, and even his wolf form assimilated into your isolated farm-life with very little issue.

(And with the hunters off your back and most townsfolk none the wiser, it could stay that way)

It was only when he’d ask you a pop culture question everyone should know, or ate the steaks you had bought raw as a midnight snack, or forgot how your air conditioning work, that you were reminded of it. How long had Heath lived as an “other”, detached from society and other people? You very rarely broached the subject, knowing how he would get quiet and bristle at the thought of the past. Of living on his own, on the edge.

So you’d answer his simple questions, let him gnaw on some bones, and let him tell you when he needed to. It was better that way.

You’re watching a movie one night, not a terribly good one, where the main character gets dragged to a club by her friends. They’re convincing her she needs to ‘live a little’, forcing her out of her comfort zone and onto the crowded, sweaty dance floor. The scene is dark and not very well lit, the background music not properly mixed and drowing out most of the audio. Though you guess thats pretty accurate to the club experience.

“Do people actually do that?”

Heath asks, head laid in your lap as you play with his hair.

“Do what?”

“Go to…that.” He points at the scene, eyes scrunched up at the jarring lights and mass amounts of people. “Go to a crowded place in the dark and dance? Why not go somewhere with some room? This place looks like a fucking nightmare.”

You laugh, watching as the clumsy main character dives and dances between egregiously grinding couples.

“It definitely can be, but people seem to love it.” You twirl a finger through Heath’s hair, only paying half-attention to the clunky dialogue. “And it can be nice once in a while, especially if you’ve got a good group of friends.” You chuckle. “Me and my college buddies would sometimes get wasted before hand, go and dance for an hour or two, then come back and get in our pj’s and watch a movie. I prefer clubs in short bursts; they can be kind of exhilarating, but exhausting.”

Heath hums, pressing his head into your palm when you scratch behind his ear. It makes you smile, but not before seeing the slightly melancholy look on his eye.

You look up at the screen. Now the main character is thoroughly drunk, holed up in the bathroom with her friends and laughing her ass off. They all dance terribly, cracking jokes and hugging each other the way drunk people do. They’ve all got big smiles on their face, even in the grimy bathroom.

Heath has gone quiet, your hands still running through his hair. He sighs.

You weren’t a big club person anymore, but you do remember loving that time of your life. Sure, you’re shitty knees and early bedtime weren’t great for it now and you’re sure you left those clubs wondering why anybody does that on the regular, but you had still been able to do it. To knock it off the checklist, even just to say it wasn’t for you.

You don’t think Heath ever did. Never was able to be that careless, joyful, and deliriously young.

“This movie sucks ass.”

Now that’s more like Heath.

—

The look on Heath’s face lingers with you for the rest of the night and into the morning, enough to remind you when you both sit down to watch something again the next night.

“How about we don’t watch a movie tonight?”

Heath turns his head up from his tub of popcorn, quirking his brow.

“Oh, did you wanna play some video games?”

“No…” You look at the dimmer switch not too far from the couch. Its right next to your back porch door, adorned with some fairy lights you hung up and proceeded to never use. That, combined with the never used bluetooth speaker above your fireplace, gives you an idea.

You hop up from the couch, queing up a certain song in your phone before flicking the dimmer and the fairy lights. The low light makes Heath’s wolf eyes shine, his ears flicking as he readjusts to his surroundings. With a little beep from the speaker, you set down your phone and jog in front of Heath, letting the song start. His ears swivel again, looking up at you like the adorable puppy he can be.

“Isn't this that song from that movie a couple nights ago?”

“Yeah!” You bop to the beat, shimmying your shoulders to the heavy drum beat intro. “Don’t pretend you didn’t like it. I heard you humming it in the shower yesterday morning. Now come on!” You grab and pull at Heath’s hand, even knowing he’s far too big for you to make him budge. “Come dance with me! Everybody’s always talking at me-”

Heath rolls his eyes, but you can tell he enjoys your discordant singing.

“Everybody’s trying to get in my head. I wanna listen to my own heart talkin’. I wanna listen to my own heart talking. I need to count on myself instead. Did you ever-”

With a dramatic pout om his face, Heath chuckles and sits up, grabbing your hand as you sing into a pretend microphone. But you’re still doing most of the dancing, shaking your hips back and forth. You wiggle your eyebrows and try to encourage him to move.

“What exactly should I do?”

“Just…” you wiggle your fingers, “let your body roll with the music. Let it consume you.” Hands still interlocked, you begin to sway Heath’s arms back and forth. He gets some of the idea, bobbing his head. Your shoulder movements become exaggerated, trying to look as ridiculous as possibke to encourage Heath to loosen up.

“I’m not gonna stop, that’s who I am. I’ll give it all I got, that is my plan.” Heath laughs at your flailing arms, beginning to shimmy his shoulders like you are. You mime the dramatic facial expressions of Zac Efron, gesturing to Heath to join you in singing. He rolls his eyes, but starts mutter-singing anyway. You didn’t expect him to know all the lyrics, but he’s actually hitting all the words with you.

I knew he liked High School Musical 2.

You pull Heath out to the middle of the living room, giving you more space to add some footwork as the chorus hits. You yank Heath’s arms back and forth and shake your hips, which only makes Heath laugh more.

“-you know you can bet on it, bet on it, bet on it, bet on me!”

You let loose one hand and stretch out to the side on the long note, when Heath pulls you back toward him for a spin. You giggle uncontrollably, singing louder and louder, squealing when Heath dips you. He nuzzles your nose and gets a peck to the lips in return.

You hop up, throwing your hand to your forehead when the dramatic slow part begins. He rolls his eye again, but you can see him nodding along.

“It’s no good at all, to see yourself and not recognize your face-” Heath hops in with the backing “oohs”. You point an exaggerated finger. “Out on my own, it’s such a scary place.” You’re cut off when Heath pulls you into his chest, wrapping his arms around your waist. But you’re even more gobsmacked when he sings the next part, in earnest.

“The answers are all inside of me. All I gotta do-” His voice is surprisingly melodic, deep but not flat or even off-pitch. “-is believe.”

The natural pause in the music would be the perfect time to sneak in a romantic kiss, but you’re both caught up in the performance now. You both turn to look at an inaginary camera when the music drops, arms now locked as if dancing ballroom.

“I’m not gonna stop, not gonna stop till I get my shot.” Moving across the living room with messy footwork, you two belt the chorus. Heath draws you down for another dip when the long note of “-bet on meee” hits. It’s silly, but you do feel like a pop star.

From the outside you’re sure you look absolutely insane. Just two adults flailing and dancing around their living room as speakers blast. If you had neighbors, they’d definitely complain or be calling the cops by now.

But right now, its just you and Heath. Dancing together, hearts pounding, with big smiles and stupid amounts of giggling. Just a pocket of your life, all sweet and your own.

The song slowly fades out, leaving to lean over and shamefully realize how out of breath you are.

God, I need to start hiking or something. This is embarassing

Heath, with his wolf stamina, is not even breathing heavy and catches you in a hug, peppering your cheek with kisses. He bounces on his heels and practically throws you down on the couch, his tail wagging behind him. He snuggles into your neck, blowing raspberries into your skin and making you laugh.

Still letting your heart slow down, you exhale and look at Heath.

“So….how’d you like you’re first dance party?”

“I liked it!” Heath pants, a big stupid smile one his face. “More than I thought I would. You being so terrible at dancing really helped.” You gasp, playfully smacking his shoulder. He blows another rapsberry into your neck, the pleqsant rumble in his chest. After a coupe more play hits and giggles, Heath relaxes into your arms. “I’ve…never really done anything like that before. It was nice.”

“Well, I’m happy to be your first.” You run a couple fingers through Heath's hair, stopping to scratch at the base of his wolf ears. He nuzzles even deeper. “And if you ever feel the need to dance party again, just let me know.”

The two of you sit like that awhile, as you often do. Just basking in each other's warmth, soaking in the skin contact.

You can’t wait to spend more firsts with him.

[thezombieprostitute]

Always the Bridesmaid - Part 2

Summary: after years of always being the bridesmaid, your sister's wedding suddenly nets you the interest of two incredibly handsome, charming men.

A/N: Just a reminder that Nick Fowler won the poll from Part 1 so we'll have to turn down Jonathan Pine. Reader is older (35+ years).

Word Count: ~1.5k

Warnings: Smut, smut and more smut.

Part 1

From the moment your alarm goes off you're up and running to get ready. The morning is such a rush to prepare you have no time to think of anything other than helping your sister and making sure you look presentable. You're secretly grateful she only chose a color for the bridesmaid dresses, letting you find a cut that complimented your figure.

You were especially grateful for that when you caught Nick biting his lower lip as he looked you over before the ceremony.

“You’re saving me a dance, right,” he whispers in your ear. You giggle as you confirm and he smiles wide, “thank you. I can imagine your dance card will be full tonight. Glad I reserved a spot so early.” Heat rushes to your face but you can’t stop smiling at his words. 

The ceremony was a delightful affair. The only problem was when the flower girl got too shy to walk down the aisle with everyone looking at her. Thankfully your mother was more than happy to help her and the ring bearer walk, hand in hand. It actually seemed to make everything all the sweeter. You really look forward to seeing those photos. 

Your sister and her new husband were given some time to themselves before the reception while everyone got set up with food and drink. Again Nick was a gentleman who held out your chair for you and gave you his undivided attention when he could. The Bride and Groom deservedly pulled his attention from time to time.

You were a little nervous about having to dance in front of everyone but Nick helped by distracting you from the crowd, focusing on him. His steel blue eyes, his comforting smile, the muscles you could feel under his sleeves, the ease with which he led you in the dance moves. He paid attention to you when you talked and didn’t push when you said you needed to sit for a minute. He really was something else.

As he leaves to get you a refill you see Jonathan approach. He looks pensive as you greet him but he does smile a bit as he kisses the back of your hand.

“I’m afraid I will not be able to follow through on my request for a dance,” he apologizes. “I’ve only just now found a few minutes with which to tell you and must immediately be back to work.”

“Is something wrong?”

“Nothing you need to worry about,” he smiles. “Please do enjoy yourself and let the staff know if there’s anything you require.”

He heads out and as you turn back to your plate you see Nick glaring after him. 

“Are you okay, Nick?”

“Was that guy bothering you?”

“Not at all,” you chuckle. “I’d promised him a dance yesterday and he was telling me he wouldn’t be able to partake.”

“His loss,” he smirks as he sits, handing you your drink.

“Well, that does leave me open for all of my dancing to be with you. If you want to keep dancing with me, that is. I’ve definitely noticed some of the other ladies giving you looks.”

“Yeah, but none of them hold a candle to you.”

“Nick, you barely know me.”

“I know that you’re smart, pretty and nice,” he starts. “I know that you’re pleasant company and I’d love to get to know you better, if you’ll let me.”

The rest of the night is spent alternating between dancing and talking. You’ve never had such a wonderful time at a wedding before. 

You’re still not sure how you and Nick ended up in your hotel room but with how he was kissing you and squeezing your tits with his strong hands, you didn’t care. 

He unzips your dress and helps you slide out of it, giving an appreciative moan at the sight of you in just your underwear. 

“Your turn,” you tell him. “I wanna see those muscles that I've been feeling all night.”

He smirks and removes his jacket and shirt. You marvel at his chiseled abs and let your hands roam over them as you return to kissing him. You move your hand lower, underneath the hem of his pants and groans as you start to palm his erection. 

“Please tell me you have a condom,” you ask.

“Absolutely,” he confirms. “Now lay down and let me have a taste.” 

He gently pushes you towards the bed until you're laying down, legs spread. He kisses down your front, removing your panties, before kneeling and taking an appreciative look at how wet you already are. Part of you feels embarrassed at being bare in front of a man you met just yesterday but the hungry look he gives you fuels your desire and overrides all other emotions. 

He starts on your thighs, alternating kisses and bites before he finally brings his mouth where you need it. His tongue moves slowly as he laps up your juices and you let out a low moan. 

“Please, Nick. Want more,” you whine as you wiggle your hips, trying to push his face where you really want him. 

“Not gonna happen,” he rasps. “I want to take my time.”

When he resumes his slow pace you sit up as much as you can, eyes flashing. You grab the back of his head and push his face into your pussy and start grinding your hips against him. 

He doesn't try to stop you and, in fact, seems to acquiesce to your demand. But there's a look in his eyes that makes you wonder. Or it would if his tongue wasn't expertly pushing you to the brink. Suddenly he stops and starts pulling away but you wrap your legs around his head, trapping his mouth where you need it. 

He keeps his lips sealed and uses his incredibly strong arms to unwrap your legs. You whine in protest but he nips your thigh, changing your tone. He looks at you with those steely blue eyes, his face and tone serious. “I said I wanted to take my time, beautiful. I was going to let you come as many times as you wanted. But after that, you're only going to come when I let you.”

You huff in protest and he chuckles, “maybe if you'd been a good girl, I'd let you sit on my face and drown me. But you had to push. Now you'll have to beg me to let you come.” He moves so that he’s hovering over you and whispers, “what’s your safe word?” You tell him and he nods understanding before moving himself back to your pussy.

Over the next hour Nick continually edges you. You initially try pushing him into making you come but he’s too strong. You start whining, pleading, begging for him to let you come. You’re a complete mess but he keeps eating you out like you’re the most delicious meal he’s ever had and he’s eager to savor every taste. Every time he pulls away, making you whine, he smirks. Occasionally checking in with you as well, making sure you’re actually okay.

The final time he pulls away he removes the rest of his clothing. “I think you’ve made it up to me, beautiful. You still have to wait for me to give you permission, but you’re going to come with my dick inside you.” 

“Thank you,” you gasp. You watch him put on the condom and you worry you’re not going to be able to wait for permission. 

He crawls over and hovers over you, kissing you deeply, lovingly, as he starts to push into you. He finds a balance between rough and gentle that has you reeling. You don’t hold back on begging him to let you come already. He watches you as he moves his hand between your bodies to start rubbing your overly sensitive clit. It feels like an eternity before he finally orders, “come for me.”

You let go and are hit with an overwhelming wave of pleasure as Nick continues to thrust into you. You can’t remember the last time you came so hard and you end up chanting his name like a prayer. It’s only when your orgasm starts ebbing that Nick allows himself to chase after his own release. 

After some gentle kisses along your jawline Nick switches into aftercare mode, seeing to your every want and need. Worshiping you as he cleans you up and holds you. Letting you fall asleep in his arms. He watches you as you sleep, thinking about how he hopes you’ll be open to this being more than just a one-and-done. 

Tagging @alicedopey and @rayofdawnworld for inspiring this little story. Tagging @icefrozendeadlyqueen because I promised I would!

[moonshine-nightlight]

Potential Short Stories

hey, while looking to next year, i have a number of short stories I'm considering and i'd like to gauge y'alls interest in them and see if there are any that should move up my list.

these are all just the top ideas i'm considering at the moment and are subject to change when i get back to writing in Spring 2024, but i really want to know if any of these grabs ppls attention as often more interest in a story motivates me to write more!

see under the read more for summaries of each story in the poll

if ur interested in more than one, vote for your favorite and mention the others in the comments/tags!

See this post for a poll on short vs long stories!

See this post for a poll on long stories!

see below for summaries and minor details (titles subject to change - but i'm also lazy and hate titling things so maybe not)

Courtship Confusion: You’ve been working with Morgan for a couple years. A consummate flirt, you’d initially been put off by his whole charming deal, but now that he’s your best friend you’ve been wanting to see if he’s still interested in dating you. Unfortunately he’s not picking up your hints. Before you give up, a pair of visiting concubi remind you of cultural differences when it comes to dating. Maybe you’ve both been misunderstanding each other. Maybe it’s time you set the record straight.

Modern w/known non-humans, ReaderxMaleSiren

Quid Pro Quo: You’d thought the only remotely positive about your husband’s death would be that you wouldn’t need to deal with your terrible in-laws anymore. Then you found out that demons were real and your husband’s family had made a deal decades ago trapping all their descendants in service to one. You manage to set up your own deal with a different demon: if you help Adriel figure out who is embezzling from his realm spanning organization, he’ll help you figure out how to get your kids free of the contract. After hitting dead end after dead end, you finally think you’re both getting somewhere, but will it be enough?

Modern w/secret demons; ReaderxMaleDemon

Goddaughter: You thought you’d seen the last of your family when you left—you’d certainly done everything you could to cut ties with them and with your father’s enemies. Unfortunately, they finally seem to have caught up with you—running into you by chance in the grocery store of all places. Now you and your daughter have been captured, you’re tied up while they’ve taken her who knows where, your father is just as useless at protecting you as always. Then you hear a familiar voice. What on earth is your neighbor, Vee, doing here? Why does he know your father? And why does he sound positively…demonic?

Modern w/secret demons; ReaderxMaleDemon

Bedwarmer: When you heard your Chancellor had died in battle and his lands given to a mountain orc who’d practically won the battle singlehandedly, you weren’t sure what to think. When the steward put out the call for a bedwarmer for said new Chancellor, you figured species didn’t matter much after all—powerful people were all the same. Still, the role came with a year reduction in indenture for whoever was selected from the candidates. You’ve never had any problem with no strings attached sex so you add yourself to the list. It’s not until you meet this Kor’Shearda and are chosen that you begin to realize how wrong you were.

Fantasy w/known non-humans; ReaderxFemaleOrc

Runalong: Sometimes you feel like you’ve spent your whole life on the move. Shuffled from one place to the next with no real say in the matter. Is it any wonder that on those long car rides from somewhere that just started to become familiar to somewhere brand new and unknown that you might imagine a companion along side you? And what does it mean that now you’re an adult and you still think you see them sometimes?

Modern w/unknown non-humans; ReaderxGNSpirit

Feral: You’ve been so happy living on your own in the little house you inherited, you didn’t even mind the strange stipulations in the will about hanging plants and markings on fence posts. You were never particularly superstitious. Or you weren’t. Strange noises at night, eyes that glow, tracks around the porch—it’s all starting to freak you out. What could be lurking in the shadows of your yard? Is it all your imagination? Or does something—someone—mean you harm?

Modern w/unknown non-humans; ReaderxFemaleHellhound

[dandylovesturtles]

100 Feet and a World Away is up against New Phone Who Dis in the tmnt separated AU comp and while the poll is a ways away I had this idea and I wanted to write it.

@callmehere-iwillappear I hope you don’t mind me borrowing your kids and I hope you like this!

(“Dandy, where is April?” SHE’S AROUND. Just not here. There were already so many people in this conversation, she’s letting the kids bond okay don’t worry about it.)

———

“And then we all ended up here!” sang the other Mikey, entirely too chipper for the story he had just finished telling, about how the other group of turtles, their opponents for the next round, had been kidnapped ten years ago and raised in captivity. Raph tries not to choke on her ice cream.

After being introduced they’d decided to get ice cream - something the other four had never had before, for reasons that had just been thoroughly explained. The four of them seemed confused by the idea of sitting at a table, so they’re sitting in a group on the floor instead, the three almost mirror images of her friends (her siblings? that is still boggling her mind) leaning against the other Raphael. He’s laying on his stomach, lazily licking from his own bowl with a contented churr deep in his throat.

(It reminds her of how she gets sometimes, when she’s alone, and it makes her sad and unnerved in equal measure.)

“Uh, wow,” says Leon, the first one on their side to react. “That’s quite a story.”

“Mikey makes it sound better than it was,” says the other Leo, with the same humor in his voice that Leon has. He’s the only one who isn’t eating his ice cream, and Raph wonders if he doesn’t like it.

“I wanna hear about you guys, though,” says the other Mikey, bouncing in place. “Where do you live? Who raised you?”

Mike and Othello (Donnie) are still recovering, so again, Leon takes the lead. “Well, we were all raised separately, but I was raised by my dads.”

“Dads!?” gasps the other Mikey, emphasis on the S. “You have more than one!?”

“Yep!” Leon sounds proud about it. “Two whole dads.”

“Woooow… two whole dads,” says the other Mikey with awe. He sounds a little jealous. Maybe Raph is a little jealous, too.

“Why do you need two fathers?” asks the other Donnie, eyes wide like he’s trying to study Leon. So far, he seems the most different from Othello-Donnie (other than her silent double). “Only one male parent is required for reproduction.”

Raph feels the defensive energy roll off Leon before he says anything. “Okay first off, don’t be homophobic.”

The other Donnie stares blankly at him, clearly confused by the sudden snippiness. The other Leo and Mikey look equally confused.

Raph very lightly nudges Leon, and he jolts, pressing his hands to his face.

“…That was a genuine question, wasn’t it?”

Othello snorts. “Did you just call the guy who grew up in a lab homophobic?”

“Shut up! I wasn’t thinking!”

“He’s adopted,” says Mike helpfully. “And his dads are in looove.”

“True, but also, eugh,” says Leon

“Awww, that’s so nice!” says other Mikey. Raph notices he’s finished his ice cream, and completely licked the bowl clean. It’s all over his lips and cheeks, which makes Raph laugh silently to herself.

“Right!?” Mike starts getting excited too - they’re playing off each other’s energies now. “You know, I think my dad should get back in the dating scene, but he always says he’s too busy planning to destroy- er,” Mike glances at the rest of them, then says, “he’s, uh, always busy with work so he can’t.” They trail off with an awkward laugh.

The other Mikey, seeing nothing amiss, starts peppering them with questions, and while he’s doing that, the other Leo quietly swaps his full ice cream bowl for Mikey’s empty one. Ah, so that was the plan.

It’s sweet, but Raph can’t stop herself from speaking up. “You should eat your own ice cream.”

Leo jumps, clearly not expecting to be called out. “Uh, I’m not hungry, so Mikey can have it,” he says.

“Well, you guys haven’t had a lot of sweets, right? Eating too much sugar at once can make you sick.”

She says it to encourage Leo to eat his own, and also because she genuinely doesn’t want this other Mikey to get a stomachache his first time eating ice cream, but the horrified look on Leo’s face makes her feel bad. He snatches the ice cream back, looking at it like it’s poison.

“I wasn’t trying to make him sick,” he says softly.

“Uh, Raph knows you weren’t,” she says quickly, holding up her hands. “It’s not a big deal.”

Still, he looks upset, which is making Mikey upset, which is making the other Raph shuffle behind them with agitation. This isn’t what she meant to happen at all.

It’s Leon who smoothes things over. He’s good at that.

“Geez, Red,” he says, nudging Raph with his shoulder. “You’re the same in real life as you are online, huh?”

She gives him a side-eye. “What do you mean?”

Leon smirks. “A mother hen.”

This makes both Othello and Mike laugh, and the awkward air over the other boys lessens. She just rolls her eyes at Leon but lets it go.

“What’s a mother hen?” asks the other Mikey.

Leon is all too happy to explain. “Means he’s always trying to take care of us. She’s like this online too.”

“Oh,” says Mikey. “Well, why not?” He leans back and bumps his own Raph, who rumbles contentedly. “Raph’s the best big brother ever! It’s the same for you guys, right?”

And that hits her.

Big brother? Is that what she is?

Well, she is the oldest. And the biggest. And if Leon, Mike, and Othello are her siblings, then…

She glances at her friends. None of them are meeting her eyes, and she feels as bashful about it as they look.

They haven’t really talked about it yet. Haven’t put a name to it. But… it’d be nice, she thinks.

Before any of them can think of anything to say, the other Donnie, who seems incapable of reading the mood of any conversation, speaks up first. “I think One should eat ice cream until he can’t. It could be valuable data.”

“Oh, yeah!” cheers Mike, clearly happy with this turn. “Let’s eat ice cream ‘til we puke!”

“Yeah!” cheers Mikey in agreement. “‘Til we puke!”

Mike holds up their hand and Mikey, who only recently learned what a high five is, eagerly returns it.

“No!” snaps Othello, holding out his arms. “If anyone in this group throws up I’m leaving and not coming back!”

“Oh well now we gotta do it,” says Leon, and the conversation erupts once again.

Raph sits back from it all, watching her other self snooze, his brothers tucked against his side, and she wonders if she’ll ever feel like big brother for real.