#while it definitely could’ve been more effective in some ways it was still great overall

[merriclo]

bro just beat totk. goddamn.

[fyeah-bangtan7]

Jung Kook: “I think we’d better not ever stop”

We asked Jung Kook to draw anything he wanted for the photoshoot. The photos featured in this article are snapshots while Jung Kook was at work. Even when the photoshoot was finished, he left the studio only when he completed his drawing.

“Butter” has been at the top of the Billboard Hot 100 chart for six weeks straight. (This interview took place on July 12) Jung Kook: I was never attached to rankings, but as good as it is and as happy as I am since we’ve kept setting records since “Dynamite,” it also feels like a burden.

Is it because you’ve been successful beyond anything you could’ve imagined? Jung Kook: Sort of. A huge number of people have given me recognition, so I’ve been going along thinking I have to work harder, but we did even better with “Butter” than with “Dynamite,” so I think I ended up feeling weighed down. That’s what I’m like. BTS is an amazing team, but maybe my problem is that I’m not able to keep up with BTS.

You were the one to set the mood for “Butter” by singing the intro to the song. Didn’t that make you feel good? You were definitely as amazing as the team itself. (laughs) Jung Kook: “Butter” just feels so good. It’s different from our usual style, so it felt different while recording. The song’s great, too. I love that, but it’s separate from that feeling of pressure. I mean, I hope BTS does even better, honestly. Lately I’ve been thinking that that pressure means I need to do better. After “Dynamite” became number one on the Billboard Hot 100, it’s not like we’re being forced to try harder; it’s just my personal ambition. I think I can do better.

Why do you think “Dynamite” wasn’t as satisfying? Jung Kook: Because I couldn’t express everything I wanted the way I wanted to. When I listen to the remixes, I think about how I could’ve sung it differently. Like, “Aw, man! If only I could do it again!” (laughs) I got some things from singing “Dynamite,” like, I’m not quite there yet. So I try to practice singing at least an hour every day, no matter what. Any singer who’s been at number one on Billboard for six weeks had better be really good at singing. That’s what I think.

Something about the way you sang in English probably made you hear your own singing in a new light. Your tone is different from when you sing in Korean. Jung Kook: Sometimes you have to bear down a little on your words to talk in Korean. Plus I’m from Busan, so I speak in a little bit of a low voice. I don’t have that when I use English, though, so it’s like there’s pros and cons. It’s easy to use your head voice when you sing in English as well, but it can be uncomfortable, while in Korean, if you try to sing higher using your head voice, it can sound a bit nasally sometimes. But at the same time, it can be hard to break old habits when I sing in English since I’ve always been singing in Korean.

“Dynamite,” “Butter” and “Permission to Dance” are all English songs and you were in charge of the introduction for all three. It seems like you put some thought into how to create different impressions for each song. Jung Kook: “Butter’s” really bouncy, as you know. It’s a little deep, it’s got a driving beat, it’s rhythmical. And before I record, I listen to a recording with guide vocals, and then when I go to record, I have to keep all these characteristics in mind and mix them together with my own style properly in this subtle way. I think it’s seriously an intuition. (laughs) I had a hard time when we were recording, obviously, and when I first did it, my voice didn’t sound right, so I had to keep looking for the right voice. I think the most important thing is to really nail the voice you want to use first, and so is figuring out how to make it your own. In “Permission to Dance,” for instance, I sang it more the way I wanted than the style the guide vocals had.

How do you come to that kind of conclusion? Jung Kook: Everyone’s voice has to sound different, so it can be overpowering if I copy the guide too much when I sing. So sometimes I follow what I’m thinking of exclusively. I was thinking about how I should sing the first part of “Permission to Dance,” and when I went to record it, even Pdogg, the producer, told me, “It’ll work best if you go with your own voice, your own style.”

What effect does listening to so many other artists’ songs and analyzing them have on you? Jung Kook: The more I listen to music, the more my vocals change. It really changes a lot when we get a song and listen to it and practice it. I guess you could say my vocal cords are always readying themselves for improvement when I practice. (laughs) And improving while I record, and just improving any time I sing. But there’s also times when it suddenly doesn’t sound right when I try it the way I want, so I just give it a try, or I quickly look up other vocalists and listen to their songs or ask some of the older artists. Doing that helps me find a certain voice I’m looking for.

You sang uncannily similar to SUGA when you briefly sang his part in “Life Goes On” over V LIVE, even though your voices are different. You’re quick at picking up on the characteristics of others’ vocals. Jung Kook: I used to rely on that a lot. Like, I can hear [the characteristics in their voices] at least. (laughs) Now, though, it’s like, Oh, [I] guess I shouldn’t do it that way. You can safely assume I’ve heard a countless number of other singers’ songs. Then I would think a lot about how I want to sing, thinking how those other singers would sing, before making my own voice. I carry over those people’s voices and vocal patterns and think about how it would sound if they sang in this room, then I think about how it would sound in my own voice, and then sometimes I can make my voice sound similar if I try to.

It seems like it was important for you to find your own style for the performances as well. Not only were the three English songs different from your earlier work, but there were also a lot of parts in “Butter” that you could only perform through gestures and facial expressions. Jung Kook: Before “Butter,” I just worked really hard, and had fun doing it, in whatever way I wanted but starting with “Butter” I think I managed to do things in a more thought-out way. I was more attentive to my facial expressions and movements and thought through what I should do in each situation in each performance to do it in my own style. And it was kind of a fun process. I don’t feel any pressure about that; I just thought I can create that kind of image if I just try to be a little cool and not cringey (laugh) for people from now on.

What image do you want people to have of you, as an artist? One that says, This is who I am as an artist right now. Jung Kook: I don’t think I’m at the level where I need to worry about that yet. I have a general idea about what kind of singer I want to be and what I want to be really good at, but I don’t think I’ve ever imagined defining myself as a certain type of singer yet. Because it’s an ongoing process, when I can prove myself, then, bam!—I give proof and become a truly influential person, only then can I go around saying, This is the kind of singer I am. For now, I don’t have anything, I guess you could say, “substantial” to show off. I think, Even if I’m part of BTS and tour stadiums, does that automatically make me better than other artists? And then, by thinking so, I center myself again.

Couldn’t you be a little softer on yourself? Jung Kook: No. I have to think about the future many times throughout the day. For example, sometimes I spend a whole day doing whatever, but whenever I do, I regret it severely. So I promise myself that I’ll get this and that done. That’s how I live, because if I don’t think that way, I won’t jump into action to get anything done. It’s like the title of our song, “Life Goes On”: the treadmill just keeps on going, and we’re on it, so I always think, I’d better not ever stop. I can express myself better if I think while I talk, and I can organize my thoughts while reflecting back on what I said. I try to think about everything in that way. I think I need to improve, whether it’s at singing or my hobbies—more than now, better than now.

Are you doing particularly well with any of your hobbies these days? It seems like you got a little better at painting, judging by your vlog. Jung Kook: I think I’m getting better overall, little by little. My vocals are where I’ve definitely improved lately. And bowling! (laughs) I learn how to paint by watching videos on YouTube. I think I’m good at picking up skills by emulating others. I’m actually not good at learning things. (laughs) I just like to do what I like to do and I naturally learn from the people around me, I guess. And I think the things I really want to learn are still the same: singing, English, exercise.

Learning from other people and wanting to do better is a form of recognizing who you can compare yourself against. Are you at all influenced by the other members? You’ve talked a lot about how much you’ve been influenced by the six older members. Jung Kook: I think I started paying attention to people other than myself after I moved to Seoul and met the other members. I wasn’t paying attention to my surroundings, but I do notice them now. It’s like I really started to see myself for who I am from that point on.

That makes me think of when you talked about seeing the sights in Seoul for the first time on tvN’s You Quiz on the Block, the way you got to know the feelings the outside world can give. Jung Kook: The first time I saw the streets of Seoul, they were enormous. I was really worried, since I’d just come to Seoul, and I got to know myself because of the change of environment. I think it was the very first time for me to think for myself, and it became the starting point for me to get to know myself.

When you took some candy you liked from the BTS pop-up store, j-hope said you were still the same from when you first met when you were 13 years old. Do you think you haven’t changed at all compared to back then? Jung Kook: In some way I must be better or different on the outside, but I’m sure there’s still things about me that are the same as when I was 13. I learned how to be considerate towards the other members and how to understand them because I fought with them occasionally, but nobody’s going to stop me if I take candy. I take it like I always did. Like when Hobi and I fought over a single banana. (laughs)

But what’s changed about you, then? Being a member of BTS must have had an effect on your view of the world. You sought understanding from your vegetarian viewers when you were eating meat in a salad on V LIVE before. Jung Kook: I thought to ask because I know that many people abroad, and in Korea, too, are vegetarians. It’s one of the things you learn when you tour around many different countries. Obviously I don’t know about every single country’s culture or personal identities or choices, so even though I have a long way to go, I think it’s important to respect them based on what I do know.

I think you must know that you’ve had an influence on a lot of people. Partway into your V LIVE, you talked about how you couldn’t find any of the kombucha you drank before anymore because it was all sold out and you thanked your fans for giving a little help to small business owners. Jung Kook: Restaurants aren’t doing well and there’s a lot of closed-up shops in the markets now, as you know. So if I’ve had an effect on even one person, it’s been worthwhile. And sometimes the people I’ve had an influence on go on to make donations, too. There could always be someone who takes advantage of the things I say or do, but I’m confident a lot of people will use them for good.

This influence is something you’ve crafted with your fandom, ARMY. I imagine you’ve been influenced not only by the other members but also by ARMY since you were young. Jung Kook: There’s a lot going on inside a concert venue: the lighting, the stage, the floor, the stage design, the video projected on the screen. Plus there’s the music, the dancing, and us. Even if they’re all in balance, ARMY has to be there to complete the scene. When it comes to our concerts, ARMY are the ones who bought the tickets and they’re the main characters. I think everything we focus on comes back down to ARMY. We share in each other’s feelings and they’re the source of our strength, and I think they have synergy with us. It’s not enough to just say ARMY and us like each other, or that we love each other. There’s definitely more to it than that. It’s, well—I don’t know. It’s hard to put into words. (laughs)

I think you need ARMY to be there at the concert for you to fully realize the concert you’re aiming for. Jung Kook: Yes, exactly! Even if everything’s set up and we’re in front of the camera, if ARMY’s not there, it’s a completely different concert. Even when ARMY’s there and there’s a live camera broadcasting it, I’m like, There’s a camera? Sure. Obviously I care about it when I have to say hello to ARMY sitting on the other side, in front of their screens. Other than that, I get all my energy from all the ARMY sitting right in front of me. That’s how much they mean to me. It’s completely different.

The concept for BTS 2021 MUSTER SOWOOJOO was similar to being in concert with an audience. It must’ve made you think of ARMY even more. Jung Kook: I’m seriously good as long as I can perform. I can put on more and more concerts in the space of a year if we’re touring. I felt it more profoundly this time since we couldn’t perform with an audience. Wow, I really took things for granted all this time. I should’ve done more.

You must be disappointed. It’s your time to shine as a vocalist and as a performer. Jung Kook: (sighs) I, well, I really need to hurry up and make a mixtape, first of all. (laughs)

How’s your mixtape going? Jung Kook: I was working on it just before I came. But it’s hard! (laughs) I could just make it about myself, and then it would be like, I started as a trainee when I was 13, I worked hard, and found success. But anyone could do that. So I keep thinking I want to make up my own original, complex story and write the songs from there. Billie Eilish’s debut album left a big mark on me when it came out, in that respect. And it’d be nice to have a cohesive flow to the tracklist, but even if it’s all jumbled up, that’s fine, too, as long the good songs keep on coming. That’s sort of what I’m thinking. So these days, rather than focusing on the album’s story as a whole, I’m just going to write whatever it is I want to say in each song. If I get that feeling right after listening to a track, I’ll try and make it. And I’m going to try to make it a little bit light-hearted.

It can’t be easy for you to concentrate on it if you’re making it here and there between all your other work. Jung Kook: It’s fine if it takes a really long time—it’s just hard to work on it in pieces. I mean, if I stay up late working away at it, it’s hard to get through the next day. (laughs) I stayed up all night again last night and slept between appointments today, but I’m still going to keep working like this today and then go work on my mixtape again anyway. I’ll do my best to release it as soon as possible. I want to write and record a lot of material.

s there anything about yourself, other than your work or concerts, that you want to show to ARMY as an individual? Jung Kook: I want to show them, that, umm … Just my real self, Jeon Jung Gook. That I’m fairly easy-going, very honest, and nothing special.

What kind of person do you think you are now? Jung Kook: I’m, I’m a, lazy … person. (laughs).

You’re being very hard on yourself. (laughs) How could you be lazy if you’re a part of BTS? Jung Kook: No, I really am lazy. (laughs) If I were alone I’d probably miss a lot of my appointments. (laughs) But I have to avoid making any mistakes when we function as a group. I’m really lazy, and—oh, I overthink things sometimes. I think more than people might expect, and I do things my way. Plus, even though I don’t care what other people think of me, I kind of still do. (laughs) I have no idea. I’m sort of goofy—? But I’m also trying to live a full life—I’m that kind of person. (laughs).

Thank you for the interview. Oh, by the way, I liked your “Butter” fan cam. Your moves were really agile. Jung Kook: Really? Do you think I’ve gotten better? (laughs).

© source.

[geometricalien]

OKAY I finished Life is Strange True Colors and it's time to give my hot trash opinions that no one asked for :) (spoilers will be below the cut)

I avoided almost everything released about this game because I did not want any spoilers whatsoever and I think that served me well.

I also came in with an open mind, I gotta say I was weary since deck nine had all of the control and I didn’t particularly like before the storm that much it was fine though.

All that said True Colors was beautiful. It has excellent graphics, compelling characters and side plots for each character, the power system was new and cool. I wasn't sure how being an empath would translate but it worked well in mechanics, was epic, and suited the theme of not just the game but Alex.

I played for about 10 hours Thursday with some breaks to stretch and get food. So needless to say, I was having a great time.

It has excellent sets and even though the power mechanics are exactly the same each time it's still fresh and creative in how these emotions can shape the world around them.

This is just a personal nitpick nothing actually important, the town is a fictional Coloradan small town and as someone who grew up in a neighboring state with similar small town/mining/outdoorsy communities- or visiting them- the town buildings were fantastic! I loved main street, I've been in towns with that exact same style. But the flower bridge and the deer were just... a tinge over the top, it felt like you were trying to sell "Paradise" way too hard. But besides that I loved the towns vibe!

I felt... a little burnt out being able to play all of the chapters at once, I think part that made the lis community so strong was that it had time to build and react to the episodes together. It gave us time to theorize and make fancontent. Versus binge gaming and shot like a bullet into the air, done too quick. I don’t feel as connected to the characters because I’ve only been with them for 14 ish hours vs months

NOW THAT BEING SAID- the pacing was good, it gave us the reins being able to free roam the map at nearly all times and it never felt like we were being dragged down

Overall, True Colors is a great addition. Had amazing voice acting graphics, characters, and themes. I definitely recommend checking this game out

Spoilers now abound:

Going back to an earlier comment- almost all scenarios where you used Alex's power in depth were fresh and interesting. My favorites being Ethan, Charlotte, and Eleanor. I bring this up because Duckie's was the most dull- which you could say matches because he is normally the life of the party so... feeling empty or dull makes sense for him. But then Pike’s was also similarly lacking in environment, so it didn’t feel as fulfilling

I loved loved loved episode 3. The larping was so much fun and I was tickled with the turn based fighting. I especially loved when Ethan made the world come to life, my heart lifted in pure joy.

The two main romance interests are... interesting. Ryan's insight and caring nature drew me to him the instant we met while Steph sort of came off... as separated? But as we became friends with them both it became super hard to chose. And at the end seeing their reactions to the bomb drop showed so much characterization. Steph's ride or die and Ryan (in my playthrough) just had someone challenge his entire life view of course that's hard to take in within 30 seconds. I got that religious gay trauma, I get it.

This is where I feel spacing out the episodes could've also helped with our fondness of characters. After Ryan didn't believe me I didn't want to pursue him anymore, my affection was weakened

However I chose to forgive both Ryan and Jed despite feeling like I missed the character development to reasonably make that decision. I understand this entire game is shadow work for Alex and it is growing her emotional intelligence by miles but I think I would have preferred more sign postings from the game saying "hey bc of your choices you are growing" which wasn't really true because-

Alex was suppressing her sadness, fear, and anger from her traumatic youth. So in episode 5, reliving all of those moments were the chance to level up in emotional intelligence. It felt odd to learn exactly everything at the very end but again it's okay because she was suppressing just like Jed which made her able to understand his emotions and walk him through them

TALKING ABOUT THAT TALK WHO GOT GIFS??? I NEED TO SEE HER EYES GLOWING AND FLICKERING WITH COLOR

I loved the parallel/bookendings of chapter 1: Side A and chapter 5: Side B, I'm a sucker for that shit

It's obvious that alot of care and heart was put into this game, it has layers and the more you peel back the more it reveals thematically

Now I got to compare it to my biggest criticism of LiS and Before the Storm, and ultimately the reason why I love LiS2 more than either of them. Does your choices actually matter?

LiS? No. The game ended with an ultimatum that made all of your choices in the end not matter and LiS is sold as a "your choices actually matter" type of game so seeing that be a load of malarkey always puts a bad taste in my mouth

Lis:bts? No. It's a prequel. I can admire the idea of "life may be futile but make the most of it" while you can and that definitely encompasses Rachel's side of bts. But that doesn’t negate the fact that this is more a game with a straight plot than LiS

LiS2? YOU GOT 4 ENDINGS AND YOU CAN ONLY CHOSE 2 AND ITS NARROWED DOWN TO HOW YOU PLAYED THIS GAME- THATS WHAT I CALL A CHOOSE YOUR OWN ADVENTURE/YOUR ACTIONS HAVE CONSEQUENCES

True Colors? I think TC lies somewhere between LiS2 and LiS in this aspect. Its definitely very railed, I think in every one you will get Jed to confess, so it depends on how you go about convincing him, romancing, and deciding your future to... well... decide your future. I can't fault it. It left it up to the player to decide and to not be screwed over by our previous choices (cough cough) and that is the crowd pleasing choice.

So, in the sense that it all feels very railed until the last 15 minutes when they spin us on an ice rink and say "freestyle baby"- it's fine. I'm not mad about it. But it does make me wonder what would've happened if we don't have any of the committee members on our side? Would we leave town effective immediately? Would the truth even have gotten out? Because if that's true... I would bump it up in the "does your choices matter?" 

You make choices and those choices have consequences, sometimes out of your control. That's what LiS2 perfected and what I want to see more in this franchise. 

[sarahjtv]

BNHA Chapter 326 Analysis: All Might’s Legacy

We’re finally back!  I hope Horikoshi had a good break to rest up.  Glad to see him back in full form!  This chapter focuses on All Might and (finally) his conversation with the Hero Killer: Stain.  It’s a simple, but very effective chapter that shows us again how important All Might is to the world regardless of if he’s a Pro Hero or not.  Anyway, I’m reading the official translations this week since Shonen Jump was released early this time b/c of a Japanese holiday.  I honestly kinda wish Shonen Jump was released on Fridays.  It’s a good way to cap off the week:

Like I said before, this chapter is primarily a conversation between Stain 🩸 and All Might ✨.  This was set up for a while since all the way back in the Hoseu arc, but it was really set up before the war happened.  All Might even mentions it in this chapter, but it got delayed for some reason.  I would say it was because of the war, but the war happened months after that second set-up, so that couldn’t have been it.  So, I wonder why it was delayed?

The title of this chapter is called “Who Are You Really?” which is the question Stain asks All Might during their convo.  All Might gives an answer, but ultimately, All Might is a true hero who wanted to step into the limelight purely to save people and give them that Symbol of Peace he thought they all needed.  Even after retiring, he still did his best to encourage and train Deku to become his successor.  He looked out for the other students along the way.  And like Aizawa said, even his presence alone is giving people the push they need to keep going.

Despite knowing all this, All Might is still disappointed in himself for not only failing Deku, but failing Japan as a whole and letting the war happen.  

Really, there wasn’t anything All Might could’ve done about the war.  His power was running out and Kamino pretty much snuffed most of it.  Even if All Might did have his power during the war, it took several Pro Heroes and students to knock out Shigaraki.  I highly doubt fighting Shigaraki + Gigantomachia would be easy for him.  

As for Deku, All Might could’ve said more to him before he took off, but how was he when Deku kept pushing All Might away.  Also, All Might doesn’t have it in him to tell Deku to stop what he’s doing as Bakugo’s told us before.  They’re the same sacrificial idiots who will risk their lives to save others.  All Might still needs to talk to Deku though.

This is where Stain comes in.  He’s still as insane as he ever was, but he isn’t out to kill All Might.  Remember, Stain thinks All Might is the only hero worthy enough to kill him.  So, instead, he gives All Might some words of encouragement that actually seem to help him.  Stain being All Might’s life coach was not have that on my bingo card...   

Stain lets him see a woman with a snowball/puffball(?) Quirk taking off the “I Am Not Here” sign from the All Might statue in Kamino and cleaning the statue too.  Turns out she does this every day despite it being dangerous to even walk outside.  That woman is the last person All Might saved during the All Might vs. One For All battle.  She was that woman who was pinned down from the debris (Horikoshi drew scars on her leg to show this; nice touch) and pleaded All Might to save everyone.  She gave All Might the strength to keep fighting.   So, in return for saving her, this woman is now saving him again. 

All Might looks at this and starts to cry 😭 as Stain monologues how All Might was loved for his smile and his will to save people.  It had nothing to do with his Quirk.  His flame still lives on in the future generations of heroes: Deku, his friends, his classmates, the Pro Heroes left, and all the civilians who still believe in him.  So long as those flames burn, All Might’s legacy will live on 🔥.  

Stain knew he was talking to All Might this whole time (he had doubts earlier because of All Might’s skinny form, so he tried buffing up earlier, but it didn’t work), so he gives All Might info he got in Tartarus.  Then he wants All Might to kill him for real.  I wonder what Stain got from his time in Tartarus?  Maybe this info will help take down Shigaraki and AFO?  Maybe it’ll have more info on other Tartarus inmates?  You gotta wonder.

Also, Stain states that he killed 40 heroes now.  Wasn’t his Kill Count in the 10s last time?  Did he kill more heroes since he escaped?  It would fit his ideology since a lot of Pro Heroes quit.  Regardless, that’s a lot of people.  His kill count is higher than Dabi’s now.  

Finally, as All Might cries, the Kamino woman sees that the rain has finally stopped.  I saw people mention how it’s symbolic how it looks like the All Might statue punched the sky to changed the weather like how All Might did that literally when he saved Bakugo and Deku from the sludge villain at the beginning of the series.  Ironically, that first punch brought rain 🌧.  The statue’s brought sunlight ☀️.  

Before I end things off, I have to mention he art in this chapter and how well it helps tell the story.  Horikoshi has always been good at letting his art show his story as much as his dialogue tells it.  All Might picks up Deku’s damaged steel mask that was left behind as a way to show that they’re still connected (also that mask was originally inspired by All Might’s smile; gotta love symbolism).  Stain and his speech bubbles are drawn as crazy as ever.  Shoto’s Ice is still there, so this is right after All Might walked away from UA last chapter (you need to melt that ice, honey, it’s a hazard).  It’s been hot minute since Horikoshi’s drawn Buff-Might in the manga and it definitely looks like his art style’s improved a lot since then.  There’s one panel that shows All Might running into danger paralleling how Deku ran in to save Bakugo from the sludge villain (it’s even drawn pretty much the same 😭).  I noticed that All Might didn’t flinch at all when Stain threatened him with his sword; there’s something sad in the fact that he almost expects to die at this point 😢.  And there’s the panel showing everyone who keeping All Might’s flame alive.  Our own Big 3 are front and center here too.  I’m still waiting for Deku to respond to Bakugo’s apology and Shoto’s time to shine, Horikoshi 😤.  Also, All Might imagines Deku clean, so I hope he’s as clean as this when he finally takes his goddamn bath 🛁!

Overall, great chapter!  Loved how the Kamino woman (please give these people names, Horikoshi...) came back and still believes in All Might.  Loved how move All Might is and I hope he finally has the courage to talk to Deku.  Can’t believe Stain gave All Might a legitimate pep talk tough.  Like, Stain is complicated.  He’s definitely a villain and he should be locked up, but he’s not AFO level villain.  He wasn’t wrong with his ideology, but that doesn’t mean all heroes should die because of it.  For example, Ochaco would’ve definitely been Stain’s target at the beginning because she did want to be a Pro Hero to give her parents some money.  A genuine and grounded goal, but not in Stain’s eyes.  So, having him show All Might the light is something to look positively on.  Even if it’s ultimately for All Might to kill Stain one day.  Still hope it’s a push in the right direction for All Might.  Hopefully for us too now that the sun’s out.    

Me @ the Kamino woman being one of the few good civilians left:

[idiotwhotalkstoomuch]

How did everyone react to Yuus real age and connection to the great 7?

 MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA THANK YOU FOR ASKING CAUSE I ALREADY HAVE AN IDEA ON HOW THEY FOUND OUT 

Note: Some characters already knew her age and connection to the Great Seven so they will react to her appearance in NRC

Btw for looks she looks very generic hence why some boys who know her history overlooked her. (by generic like long brown hair, blue eyes and eyebags. I’ll show a picrew of how I intend her to look soon when I finally pick a favorite)

Also Yuu is royalty of the Valley of the Thorns. When I get back to writing everything will come together.

Also also I need more research to do all these characters properly but since everyone needs a reaction I asked my friend for help so if there seems to be a difference then yeah you know why.

How they found out

(Post overblot Riddle)

*in the infirmary*

Yuu: Relax I was only cut-

Sebek: *enters infirmary* Your Highness! Malleus-sama ordered me to check on you after the news of the overblot came out!

Ace: Wha-

Deuce: Y-your Highness!?!

Yuu: *chuckles*

Yes the scene is somewhat comedic but its just how it is. Me and my friend liked the scene better as a comedic one than a serious one as things get more serious later on so may as well keep up some humor.

HEARTSLABYUL

Riddle Rosehearts - Very shocked and ashamed. He knew of Yuu’s existence and actually read about her and her history as a child but couldn’t tell it was her on first glance because they’re meetings had him in a bad mood from troublemakers so he didn’t notice.

 Treats her with the utmost respect even if she tells him to relax. He’s very embarrassed that someone who’s been in the presence of all the Great Seven and befriended or in some cases raised them had to see him and the dorm in such a state.

Trey Clover - It came off as quite a surprise to him especially since he had been treating her like one of his kouhai. He’s one of the more relaxed about the reveal and will only ask if there needs to be changes in the way she’s addressed but overall their interactions are hardly affected. Though he will stop treating her like one of his kouhai as she is older than her by quite (*cough centuries*) a lot.

Cater Diamond - See this man had the advantage of putting a picture of him with Yuu in Magicam which definitely brought out someone who knew of Yuu.

He was pretty surprised to see a bunch of comments asking if that’s legit and was going to ask her about it but Unbirthday party preparations got in the way. Needless to say wanted another selfie with her on his Magicam to tell all his followers it’s legit and how he JUST found out.

Ace Trappola - Isn’t all too worried about it. He’s not one to care all too much about titles and all that stuff but he does take her age as something to tease her on.

When Grim and Deuce are annoying him or causing trouble, he’ll joke about how their troubling the “grandmother” and overall takes it without much effect on their relationship.

Deuce Spade - Is shook beyond belief and has to go and mentally process the reveal.

Should he tell his mom that he’s met such an important historical figure? Wait no should he ask Yuu about it? Would it be rude? AH! SHE SAW HIS DELINQUENT SIDE WHILE ARGUING WITH ACE!

Poor boy is so confused on what to do especially since Yuu came from a magicless student that supposedly has a curse according to the mirror to royalty that raised or befriended all members of the Great Seven.

SAVANACLAW

Leona Kingscholar - Well this lion will continue to chug his respect women juice.

He already respects women back at his home and while for them its due to their strength, in Yuu’s case its cause of her age and wisdom that she shares from time to time. 

Ruggie Bucchi -   Ruggie would joke around Yuu and treat her like he does his grandmother. He'd probably poke on her getting old and how she probably shouldn't do so much strenuous activities both teasingly and seriously (much to Yuu's dismay. Her body doesn’t actually age.)

Doesn’t rob from or prank her mainly because he doesn’t feel like getting chewed out by the others who treat her like a goddess for befriending and even raising some of the Great Seven.

Jack Howl - Jack is cautious of his behavior around Yuu as he is a respectful young man.

Tends to worry a bit over her being very casual and relaxed in Twisted Wonderland especially since she’s such an important person in history and tends to be a bit overprotective of her.

Is still tsundere.

OCTAVINELLE

Azul Ashengrotto - He. Freaks. Out.

He did extensive research and studying as a child so he knows all about her and her history with the Great Seven.

He wonders how such a historic and ancient woman can casually walk around NRC with little recognition and hopes he can stay calm and suave if she were to ever approach him.

Jade Leech -  Jade is intrigued and amused with Azul’s reaction to her. As long as both Azul and Floyd were happy, he couldn’t care less. Though he does want to know if she can cook, he wants help in Mostro Lounge.

Is pleased to have someone to help wrangle Floyd in his more problematic moods. (”In the years I’ve lived in I’ve seen many moody people this isn’t much)

Floyd Leech - Floyd really couldn’t care less.

He sees the little shrimpy (she’s 170 cm tall) and wants to squeeze her, so what if she’s like 900? Floyd wants to play with the shrimpy!

SCARABIA

Kalim Al Asim -  Kalim is, well, excited. He’s awe struck at the fact she’s been alive for that long and would probably want to know more about her life. Kalim is a curious kid.

Despite his energetic nature, he likes hearing her share stories of the past.

When he wants to be more independent, he goes to her for help since she’s lived for so long.

Jamil Viper -  Jamil would be curt and formal, though he’s currently having a epileptic brain seizure. Jamil was well versed in history, and well...having someone his influential just struck something.

Is cautious of her during the Scarabia arc since she might be old and wise enough to see through his plan.

POMEFIORE

Vil Schoenheit - Vil was already interested in Yuu at the beginning due to being a woman and had a lot of potential but was unimpressed at her eyebags but likes her mature appearance despite being a first year- 

Wait the potato is HOW old?

Vil is impressed. Yuu is hundreds of years old yet looks to be in her early twenties at most.

When he learns that Yuu had even met the Evil Queen, he immediately went to ask about what the beautiful Evil Queen did to look as gorgeous as she did and Yuu happily indulges him.

Rook Hunt -  Rook is undeniably curious, especially after Yuu manages to evade him. He makes it a habit to monitor her movement, randomly ambush her, and try and chase her around the campus. His success varies on the amount of potato's that surround her. He stays away when she's near Diasmonia.

He enjoys chasing her whenever Yuu is around Ruggie or at rare times, Leona as he'd say, "It's hitting two birds with one stone"

Rook scopes out and probably doesn't intervene as much, opting to observe her movements.

Epel Felmier -  Epel is essentially confused, and is currently feeling pity for her as she’s being crowded by so many students. He grimaces when Rook takes interest in her. Epel sends Apple Juice for life fuel. He knows she’ll need it

IGNIHYDE

Idia Shroud -  Idia has heard of Yuu, especially with their rather complicated family history. He’s pretty formal towards Yuu.

Generally avoids her even with their family in better terms and Yuu even friends with Hades now. Is upset at her and Ortho’s alliance to get him out of his room.

Ortho Shroud - When Ortho hears her age and experience, Ortho is overjoyed.

He’s so happy to have Yuu join him in his mission to get his brother out of his room. Is oblivious to past family drama.

DIASOMNIA

Malleus Draconia - Yuu had raised him and his family up to his grandmother, the Witch of Thorns, of course he recognized her as soon as he saw her. He’s surprised to see her in NRC but its a welcome one. He uses a spell on Ramshackle to make it habitable for the woman that raised him alongside Lilia. 

Finds it amusing that the students had no clue. She’s in history books though Yuu does have a rather mediocre and youthful appearance so it must be why they mistook her as a student.

Yuu had asked him to keep quiet on it but unfortunately it seems that Sebek had exposed her while doing orders on his behalf. He apologizes over it and of course Yuu isn’t mad over it, more exasperated.  

Lilia Vanrouge - Lilia is amused that Yuu was mistaken by the teachers as a teenager that could be a student especially since Yuu is older than himself by a few hundred years. 

When the cat’s out of the bag, he’ll openly tease the students to be nicer to Yuu who could’ve been friends or related to their great great great great great etc or less grandparents and is their elder.

Is amused as the students attempt to get Yuu into more modern culture, having been accustomed to letters and more traditional ways for so long.

Silver - While Silver was primarily raised by Lilia, he’s surprised to see obaasa- Lady Yuu in NRC. 

He isn’t affected all too much since he isn’t addicted to guarding Malleus and Yuu like Sebek but he is quite happy to see her and can always tell when she visits since he tends to wake up with a pillow at the random place he slept in.

Sebek Zigvolt - He is ABSOLUTELY A P P A L L E D. Yuu to Sebek, is the most honourable woman to have ever walked the face of this planet. She has managed to raise most of the great seven and bring kingdoms to prosperity. She helped Malleus-sama train, she helped Lillia-sama rise through the ranks and even brought Maleficent to power in her early days.

The moment he gets to catch up to her in Ramshackle, Yuu has to calm him down because he goes feral when he sees where she has to live in but is appeased when Malleus uses magic to make it habitable and helps her personalize it.

Very clearly struggles to address her casually, shown with him being the one to expose her post overblot Riddle. 

Keep sending asks bois I love receiving them. Sorry this took a while there was a lot to go over.

[ystk-archive]

First of all, big apologies to the six people above who asked me about this song over a month ago when it came out. I understand what Nakata meant when he said he only knows a song is finished when he hits his deadline – I could’ve easily let this sit another week and came back and messed with it more lmao.

If you want the short and simple of it: it’s nice, with all that piano it’s sort of reminiscent of jelly (aside from the WOF thing which I’ll, uh, get into below), it’s great to see Toshiko in one of their MVs again (and Nakata directing which hasn’t happened since ’07) though I’m not wild about the video per se. I guess in a broad sense I would say I like it, it’s a return to form for him and infinitely more enjoyable than anything he’s done with his “officially solo” material, but I could also fully understand if someone thought it was boring.

For my actual thoughts on it...

Hikari no Disco (ひかりのディスコ; Light Disco) as a whole package is sort of unusually mired in nostalgia. It’s got all that densely layered, classic style Nakata’s best known for which has been largely absent from his other projects over the past six years of CAPSULE (god I still don’t like the all-uppercase stylization) being in live-shows-only mode. As a piece of music it has an endearing sense of comfort and awe; it amuses the listener with odd little vocal modulations (my favorite is at 2:02), pointed percussive moments, and a strong piano backbone that work in tandem to give it character and charm. It even eschews the club-ready rinse-and-repeat of Nakata’s past compositions for capsule in favor of something very traditionally pop: an actual, proper break right before the song’s climax. Maybe it’s not a stretch to say all the tiny flourishes and embellishments in Hikari are a pure reflection of Nakata finally finding some kind of reason to go back to capsule – the overly bombastic (and loud) way the track opens feels like a curtain unveiling, like somebody pointing to capsule and going “hey, look at this!”

Though there is a bit of an elephant in the room here and that would be the recurrence of the motif from WORLD OF FANTASY (the repeating pattern of twelve-ish notes) which defined that track ten years ago. For the person who mentioned him recycling material, he did say in his Real Sound interview that he deliberately sampled it, but despite my agreeing with him in that it’s a good motif I have a few issues with its reappearance in Hikari. It’s such a specific and memorable facet of a previous track in their discography that its inclusion here feels like a sister song has been created rather than an entirely new work. Not only that, but Nakata went one step further with this callback and basically reimagined the entire music video for WOF as well. He’s definitely not a stranger to self-reference within his music but it normally seems to occur under incidental circumstances, and since historically capsule isn’t a music unit that does a lot of looking back, it comes across strangely for longtime listeners. Nostalgia and sampling oneself aren’t inherently bad, the problem here is that it doesn’t do enough to transform its inspiration point into a solidly new work. I spend both the song and music video just thinking about WORLD OF FANTASY and comparing the two in my mind.

Which, speaking of new works, you probably don’t need me to tell you this brings absolutely nothing new to the table for Nakata’s standard. I’m mixed on whether or not I could call this a detraction, because on one hand I’ve believed for years that he could stand to break out of his comfort zone musically and really try wholly different things (CAPS LOCK is an example), but on the other hand I recognize that capsule’s first new track in six years may not be the place to expect that. I think my concerns right now are for an album that’ll be too self-referential and maybe too focused on being something people remember liking from over a decade ago. (I mean, even their new artist photo is a goofy MORE! MORE! MORE! reference. Love the gloves, though.)

Lyrically Hikari is even more nostalgic, verging on the same type of sweetness present in past capsule songs like FRUITS CLiPPER’s dreamin dreamin and FLASH BACK’s Eternity. I often find myself fixating on the line “この身体にまだ / 慣れてないけど” (“Though I’m still not used to this body”); it strikes me as a strange thing to say in a song that’s otherwise teeming with sentimentality and familiar words (disco, stars, sparkling, landing, lights). Is the speaker meant to be an alien that got turned into a human? Are they now a 41-year-old grappling with age? Am I reading into things here? To answer the person who asked what the song “means,” it’s really up to your interpretation and how you relate to it. For me it’s a song about the lights of the city at dusk, the lights of the club and, just maybe, the lights inside all of our hearts. (That was awful. I’m kidding.)

The music video is an anomaly in that it is apparently Nakata’s return to the director’s seat after a fourteen-year absence from helming this aspect of capsule. While video direction isn’t exactly his forté, nor has it ever seemed like a passion of his, I’ve always enjoyed the outside-the-box approach that yielded visual works like Retro Memory’s stylish, static angle lounge singer concept and Glider’s quirky portrayal of the afterlife, or something. Despite what I said earlier, Hikari is equally helped by the immediate parallel the viewer will draw between it and the music video for WORLD OF FANTASY – it’s almost as if (note: he did not say this! I’m speculating!) Nakata revisited WOF and felt dissatisfied by director Tani Atsushi’s “night drive through Tokyo but make it Blade Runner on a budget.” As someone who never particularly cared for that MV, I have to praise what Hikari does differently with the same basic premise. Here, Toshiko is shown through a neutral lens that chooses not to highlight her body as she gets into a Honda Prelude, an older car almost utterly devoid of the cool points earned by WOF’s Lamborghini. The core of Hikari’s intrigue is in anachronism: the car is from the 1980s, but the road Toshiko is driving on didn’t exist at that time, so when does the music video take place? They carefully include a shot of Tokyo Tower, a symbol of pre-2010s Tokyo, and exclude the much newer Skytree. There’s also the appearance of the cassette tape from which the single’s cover art and central nostalgic ethos are derived. Where WOF followed expectations of an ultra-sleek futuristic cityscape, Hikari is subversive in only the way something with Nakata’s direct involvement could be. It does it all with an unsteadily amateurish camera, a fixation on the unfocused glittering lights of the city, and an intense 3D-effect filter that brings to mind Sugarless GiRL, his last directorial work.

Though as charmingly set up as Hikari is, the video – and Toshiko – ultimately go nowhere. Not that capsule’s music videos were ever particularly story-driven (the animated sci-fi trilogy notwithstanding), nor do they need to be, but there’s a one-note sameness that permeates Hikari and leaves me wanting more. This is especially glaring in the way the video ends with in-car audio and prolonged silence, suggesting something is about to happen, but nothing does. As the music itself ended I found myself desperately hoping for a visual conclusion to go with it: maybe she’d answer a phone call, or arrive at her destination and get out, but the MV just sort of...stops. Legend has it she’s still driving to this day.

Overall the music video does its job better than any other capsule MV between 2010 and now, and the musical nostalgia here is a fun diversion even if it isn’t exactly introducing new ideas. I’m presently just confused about the status of the album (and whether something as jarringly old-school as Utsusemi will get tacked on there) but capsule’s not really followed consistent scheduling since they moved to Warner/ASOBISYSTEM. Maybe next time they drop something I’ll be more conscientious of the timing of answering questions about it though, lol.

[fannishcodex]

So I love @revasnaslan 's Where One Fell Verse, a SPOP AU. :D (Will add a link to the fic series in a comment or reblog below after remembering that tumblr sometimes has issues with embedded links, I think.)

Like, I really love it a lot, it borders on self-conscious "am I being too much, will this for some reason bother the fic writer??" And really, I’ve realized, no way, it won’t, especially since I write fic too and know I would be delighted if my fic got that reaction; but I think this may be more part of my self-consciousness and shyness. In any case, my affection for these fics is on hyperfixation level. I'm in the WOF Verse fandom. It's a thing I've been thinking about in some way since I found it late last year via @cirusthecitrus, it's one of the things that cheers me up these days. I struggle to articulate my pleasure with this fic, but I want to try to do it more.

This fic is a wonderfully character-driven story.

Fic spoilers under the cut, so recommend reading Where One Fell (fic 1) and Everything But A Door (fic 2) before this--and also, just, this fic has my deepest rec and everyone should check it out:

But, another different note first, even more self-conscious on my part: me writing about this fic more feels long overdue, but I really do struggle to sometimes articulate even my positive feelings about a thing because I want to get it across well--but I'm trying to more just spill it out now instead of trying to refine it more; and just also other things have been...a lot, there's been a lot (good and less good) that's pulled my attention in other directions too. So, long overdue, I wish I could've done more earlier, but I still just want to...gush about the fic; but I get self-conscious and worry about, like, "I don't want to end up pestering/pressuring and asking for immediate gratification for a new chapter/I don't want to guilt-trip for an update especially since I feel like I understand because I write fic too and I write slow and it's hard"...but I still want to gush about WOF verse, especially since it's like any other story I enjoy. I like gushing about the stories I enjoy.

So, again, this fic is wonderfully character-driven, which I love.

I'll bring up some canon for obvious reasons, but mostly in terms of contrast. One of the ways WOF Verse felt refreshing and drew me in was that after SPOP canon--well, in some ways SPOP canon feels like a wasted ensemble show; like many other things SPOP doesn't pull off, it doesn't pull off an ensemble show (especially when it ends up sidelining a bunch of characters that should've been prioritized more instead of a very mishandled character), and it kinda feels like it ends up having too many characters/like it starts feeling like too many characters if some are sort of just there and not really used (and I have my thoughts on who should've been prioritized, but that's another post; though granted I think my interest in this fic really indicates some of the characters I would've prioritized more).

So, I enjoyed how WOF Verse focuses on a smaller cast, giving them more attention and exploring them more. The general summary of the fic immediately drew me in, because I'm a sucker for family themes and dysfunctional families and familial love getting messy and complicated in fiction, and I hadn't realized I needed clone Hordak and his genetic template/progenitor Horde Prime shifted to them being literally brothers, plus the added twist of having Horde Prime actually care for his brother, but Prime's become thoroughly twisted in how he shows that affection and protectiveness--didn't know I needed that until I found this fic. And oh do I enjoy how this fic opened up the original '80s She-Ra/MOTU up to me more, because I just thought "wow, Hec-Tor Kur is a good made-up alt name/'real-ish' name with a last name for Hordak in this AU, and Anillis Kur just sounds cool and it just feels like it fits as an alt name/real name for Horde Prime when he's not always using that title," and I thought making them literally blood brothers was just a neat twist on them being clone and genetic template/progenitor. But nope, apparently Hec-Tor Kur and Anillis Kur are their real alt names from the original '80s canon which also heavily implies they're brothers, and that's really cool. (And I think it would've been really interesting if spop/the latest reboot had actually just explored that more, explored them more as brothers and siblings.)

Again, WOF is very character-driven, and I love that. And I enjoy how this feels like it also fits the story and world of the fic, which involves Anillis Kur/Horde Prime going into Extremely Overprotective Brother Mode and confining his sickly younger brother Hec-Tor (Hordak) to the Velvet Glove because he's that paranoid about anything happening to his brother due to a lot of family trauma that happened before Hec-Tor was even born/when he was just a baby (and baby Hec-Tor himself almost succumbing to illness and dying did not help with Anillis's issues), not to mention that controlling; so much of the fic so far is in a closed world, it adds to the hyper focus on the characters in that closed world. I appreciate how at times the fic really does have this claustrophobic feeling. I like how it sometimes makes me think of like a one-setting/limited setting play on a multi-chapter scale.

And of course, I like the specific characters getting this sort of hyper focus, and WOF makes me enjoy them even more. I love Hordak, his character, his voice, his design, etc. Horde Prime also has such a cool design and again that same cool voice, I adore Keston John's voice acting and his range in it. Canon S5 doesn't give him enough internal depth or character though, and ultimately makes him too much of just an obstacle and symbol/too much of a plot device in the show and a wasted opportunity for a more interesting character. That becomes even more apparent in contrast to WOF Verse, because Anillis Kur/Horde Prime is so much more interesting!!! Like Anillis/WOF!Prime is so much more interesting, it makes me realize how canon Prime is lacking in character/interest.

Ohman, this Prime. Prime has a great design and a great voice, and WOF has an interesting personality to match those elements in quality. There's so much fascinating contrast with him in WOF, and it makes him feel like a more unsettling villain. We've seen him care, and so it feels more frightening when he turns more aggressive and ruthless and cold. WOF's opening scene really effectively sets that contrast with him; it starts with him exhausted but having a really sweet moment with a very young Hec-Tor, and then not long after that when Hec-Tor's asleep in his arms it's a very unsettling mood whiplash with how Anillis coldly treats the clone attendant; it's even very effectively distilled and crystalized even further with the image of Anillis holding a sleeping Hec-Tor in his arms while glaring daggers at the clone attendant, that contrast of love and threat. Like, definitely a character that can do Both and I love that. And contrast adds layers to Anillis, it renders him in even more emotional dimensions, he can be multiple things at once.

And I rather love that he's far less...touchy, with everyone; it more finally struck me that he's rarely negatively touched anyone until a pivotal scene, and it being a rarity made the scene pack more of a punch, and then I looked back and realized he just doesn't do that often, there's another earlier scene that also feels shocking because it's another rare use of explicit touch, his touch is more targeted--he doesn't need to constantly do it to feel threatening at all, and is in fact much more threatening and unsettling without it. (I literally had to pause some instances because I was nervous about what Anillis would do next.) It's so fascinating to watch Anillis steadily grow worse and to watch Hec-Tor gradually have the dawning realization of what Anillis is really doing and the truth of his situation. It's interesting to see Hec-Tor gradually realizing that what he's lived with his whole life and what has felt normal isn't a good thing, it's not acceptable.

And I really do like that familial love is such a motivating factor for Anillis, and that it's something that feeds into a lot of his ruthlessness and villainy; and it feels like something I still don't see enough in fiction. And it just feels more believable, more consistent. Anillis acts horribly, is abusive, but it still feels like what he does is out of love for his brother and he really is blind to what he's actually doing to his brother, that it's the opposite of what he wants, it's not protecting him like he believes. I like that level of character believability/consistency, and part of that also involves how it's overall framed, and it's still framed as pretty terrifying; Anillis cares about his brother, but his methods are twisted.

And my gut feeling does...well, feel connections between canon and this AU--and that may be obvious as source material and fic based on it, but I mean--it's as if canon were the very rough first sketch/draft, and WOF is the fully realized version of the character, plus the change of shifting his brotherly status into a brother that actually does care but goes about it in a horribly twisted way. WOF takes parts and pieces and little details from canon and fleshes them out into something more fully dimensional and more interesting. Like the trace of canon Prime's collection with plants/other things and even arguably the imagery at the end with his ship the Velvet Glove becoming a tree feel connected to a more fleshed out version in WOF where Anillis keeps a garden. And there's so much meaning that can be pulled from his garden--it's another reflection of his controlling behavior with the way he controls/manages the garden; on the flip side, it feels like it further reflects the contrast/dichotomy in his character, as gardens can still have positive connotations too--it can reflect the potential Anillis had (may still have?) for genuine good/for genuinely nurturing care. And it also does more explicitly point to Anillis's affection for family since his late father had kept a garden too and Anillis's own garden on the Velvet Glove still has his father's plants. There's so much done with Anillis's garden.

And with his backstory and the contrast in his character, just his...everything, I also want to know more about Anillis, I'm curious for even more of his backstory, even going more into "why are you like this?" Like this is a genuinely fascinating, charismatic, threatening, multi-faceted antagonist right here.  

And I can go on about Anillis, but I love Hec-Tor/Hordak in this too. I love Hordak, and I enjoy how this still feels so much like Hordak, but with a different life; I feel like there are commonalities that remain from canon within him combined with differences based on the AU he's in and the different experiences he's lived with. Like, there's such an interesting detail with Hec-Tor's growing anger issues that remind me of Hordak--it's there, but different because of their different lives, Hec-Tor's developing because of his isolation but still quieter, simmering, because his brother only has his best interests at heart, he shouldn't act like this... And then it’s so nice to see Hec-Tor be even more talkative about SCIENCE because he does have more space to be a bit more open about his passions in this AU/different life situation. And it's all like another AU I didn't realize I wanted until I saw it--I really dig seeing Hordak/Hec-Tor as a baby, as a little kid, getting to have a childhood and get to have more typical developmental stages and to have more familial experiences, albeit twisted ones. And I love how the story has shifted to Hec-Tor more, love his POV and following him on his journey.

And the clones! The clones are great in WOF and give me feels too. I love how more of them are focused on as individuals, and that we get to see more of their characters and glimpse their differing views. And when Etherian characters join in, they're as well written and interesting too (the Entrapdak is so good). I just like WOF's cast, and the line-up plucked from canon and how they adjust to the AU; this ensemble just feels better, and it's utilized and treated better than canon.

And the worldbuilding with Anillis & Hec-Tor’s race and the clones and their world is so good and seamlessly interwoven with story and character, enhancing the whole thing even more and making things even more interesting.

I just...really love these characters and this story. They have a lot of heart and intrigue.

(Disclaimer: I definitely ended up having trouble figuring out tags for this. Especially since I think only the first five tags actually show up at first? And I think last I checked tumblr freaks out over dashes within a tag so while “hec-tor kur” probably fits better, I don’t think tumblr can handle that for some reason so just going with “hordak,” which also really still just fits.)

[redheadscribe]

Fate Winx Saga Review

This is the Winx Club

This isn't

Ah Winx Club, I remembering waking up early in the morning to watch it on Saturday, I thought that it was a cool show and my favorite character was Bloom during the first three seasons when it was under 4Kids. I thought that the characters were cool, the setting was pretty awesome as well and overall it was fun. Years later I was pretty shocked that it is still going on though from what I heard it has lost a lot of it’s quality with season eight being a mixed bag and an okay art style. Now Netflix has acquired the rights and there were two separate shows that they produce.

The first being World of Winx, an animated spin off show showing the girls hiding out on earth helping people and dealing with an evil version of Tinkerbell? In all honesty I was a little confused like how was this a spin off? Was it a spin off from season four as Roxy is a supporting character in this universe? That part confused me but overall it was a pretty good show but at this point I don’t think Winx Club fans wouldn’t mind a reboot that got the She-Ra treatment. Needless to say Winx Club is a popular show that was big in Italy and other countries but it is not what it used to be. Especially when we have this show to talk about Fate: A Winx Saga.

When I first saw the trailer I was pretty confused because none of the shots in the trailer reminded me of Winx Club. Also none of the characters were recognizable as they white washed and replaced Flora, and also white washed Musa. The only three characters that were recognizable were Bloom, Stella and Aisha. However there personalities have changed so much that I can’t even say that this is a faithful adaptation. I know in adaptations there has to be certain changes that you have to make because either to budget or they can’t fit it in and some stuff has to be cut. The least the show could do was get the fashion right, I mean the only one who should be wearing red is Musa while Bloom is the one that wears different shades of blue. Then again the fashion overall is a big joke and they really should fire the costume designer as I looked and she has had no experience dressing up teenagers. Rants out of the way lets see how they butchered the characters.

Let’s start with the leading Pyromaniac herself, Bloom. What the hell did they do to my girl? As a fellow redhead myself it is safe to say Bloom was the one I lean towards to the most even though I did see myself in Tecna, and Flora. Bloom is a stuck up bitch in this show and has to make it all about her, which was one of the problems in some of season four and later on. She is also unbelievably gullible and really stupid. She basically believes anything that Beatrix, a psychopath and a known liar about the whole Not Domino city, yeah I don’t care about the name of this said city in other world. She is a problematic Pyromaniac something that cartoon Bloom season 1-3 would be horrified about, and surprisingly bland.

Now, this Bloom could have worked if there were either more episodes or just better writers. Think about it, she is a girl who discovers that she has these unknown powers and when her emotions get the better of her and harm her family she could be a little distant and closed off. She is angry and confused because she doesn’t understand what is happening which can lead her to feeling a lot of emotions. Though I do hate the fact that they ruined Mike and Vanessa but I forgot that this is a teen drama and as a teen drama parents are assholes, it is the law of teen television. There could have been a nice arc of Bloom dealing with the fact that she has been lied to her entire life, feeling angry and betrayed but then going back to the Bloom we love from the first three seasons as she realized that she was the same person, she just now has a place where she can feel at home while also having awesome fire powers. However we got the worst of Bloom that is shown post season five.

Now lets get to Stella, and I will try my best to contain my rage when I am writing this. Did a person who worked on this show really thought that it would be a great idea to change Stella and make her Diaspro? You know we could’ve added Diaspro and Stella in the same show, she and Stella could’ve been friends due to the two girls being royalty, but then both Stella and Sky would realize that she is a toxic person and break away from her. This is not Stella and the cartoon Stella wouldn’t be caught dead in some of the outfits that she was wearing, maybe the last episode outfit but that’s about it. They could’ve done something with her wardrobe, they could have her dress up as a old woman when her mother was around trying to impress her, and then dress up in clothes that the original Stella is known to wear. Stella is a stereotypical mean girl and there is nothing nuanced about her portrayal. This is not Stella this is Diaspro with Stella’s name.

Now let’s get on to Aisha, she is a fine characters but this isn’t Aisha as she has none of Aisha’s personality she is not even a princess of Andros and well she has no story outside of helping her white friend. Aisha was a standout of season two and had one of the best character entrances in the series. She doesn’t get a story of her own and she is relegated to just being the best friend that get’s Bloom out of trouble. The actress Precious Mustapha deserves way better than what they are giving her.

Now it is time for everybody’s favorite white-washed duo Terra/Flora and Musa. There have been videos and posts that are going over how stupid Netflix and Rainbow for doing this. Just to give everybody context, Musa’s appearance is based off of Lucy Liu and Flora is based off of Jennifer Lopez. I think that speaks for itself in how Netflix and Rainbow screwed this up especially when there are plus size Latinix actresses they could have casted. Now let’s get into their character, weirdly enough they are the ones that have the most interesting friendship dynamic, Terra is a fine character but she is not Flora and Musa is a lot more cold hearted and instead of being a fairy of music she is a mind fairy who is an empath. Now music in a way can evoke emotions and connect people on a deep level but her empathic powers are so undefined. Terra is a fine enough character and her family is pretty interesting.

Now lets get into the boys, Sky, Riven, Dane, and Sam. If there is one thing that I could applaud the show is that anyone can be a fairy or a specialist, it’s just a pity that they excluded the witches. Then again the witches do get the short end of the stick even in the cartoon. Sky is bland, and the actor only ever had one expression throughout the whole show. Riven is, well Riven has always been a jerk but cartoon Riven had some more well likable features than TV show Riven. Dane, he’s fine I would have liked him more if he wasn’t taking so many stupid pills when it came to Riven and Beatrix, boy he needs to find a better man to crush on becuase, Riven is not worth it at all, even if I didn’t like his performance I could definitely see him crushing on Sky way more than Riven. Sam is a fun character and I was glad to see a male fairy added to the school but that’s all I can say about him the boys are okay. If there was one thing that I enjoyed about World of Winx is that they didn’t include the boys and there was nothing lost from it, it was just the girls kicking ass and taking names.

There is not much to say about the school staff and Dowling is a fine character that is a lot like Faragonda, only really ever helps Bloom and reassuring her she is special. I wish there was more done with Terra’s father and all but nope any positive family interaction is bad in a teen show. Overall the school staff, I don’t think that we can even call them a school staff they were a joke.

Now let’s get into the villains, if there is one thing that fans of the first four season can agree on is that the villains were always a standout for each season one. That being said the only effective villain is Beatrix, even though they could have just done the Trix. Let me just say this, The Trix were a great villain for the first season and well they went downhill like the whole cartoon show. Also what is the deal with Rosalind and Sky’s father. To be fair Sky’s dad in the cartoon show has always been a jerk but a jerk that raised a psychopath like Beatrix is too much. I am a little nervous about how they will do if they actually introduce The Trix, Lord Darkar, and Valtor or even the Wizard’s of the Black Circle. Needless to say the villains were just bland.

That is if they actually even use the villains from the cartoon show because so far we have the rather bland Rosalind, I just don’t care for her and there is no need for her to be in the show, Daphne does not deserve this. Then there is Sky’s father and I don’t care and Luna and wow does every teen show have to have terrible parents. How is a cartoon show from the early 2000s is more diverse and interesting than this? I just don’t care at all about the villains except for Beatrix.

There is also the fact that the show is only six episodes and that really does hinder the show as the show could’ve used more episodes to flesh things out then maybe just maybe this show would’ve been interesting. I also see that there are some writers and producers from the Vampire Diaries that are attached to this project and well that explains why some aspects of the show seems dated. Overall Fate, is a bland show that definitely does have better writing than Riverdale but that is not saying much. The characters are bad, and the fashion is terrible something that was a main aspect of the show. The world is generic getting rid of the epic sci-fi fantasy world and Rainbow should’ve just rebooted the animated show.

[elliepassmore]

Children of Blood and Bone review

4.5/5 stars Recommended for people who like: magic, fantasy, non-Western fantasy, multiple POVs, A Song of Wraiths and Ruins I really liked the worldbuilding and thought the world was very vibrant. I liked that the story took us to multiple different places so we got to see a wide range of Orïsha's environments and people. Adeyemi did a good job of incorporating maji/diviners-kosidan relationships into each location so that they felt realistic. One town might have a mix of both where the maji/diviners get shaken down by the guards in a 'normal' way while the next might be brutal for the maji/diviners, and yet another might treat them as relative equals. The way the guards treated the maji/diviners was also realistic, unfortunately, and you can definitely see the influences of real-world laws and actions in the ones present in Orïsha. The magic system overall makes sense and I don't think it needs a ton of explaining: diviners as baby!maji who will get their powers from one of the gods/esses at age 13, the magic is usually passed through the maternal line so kids tend to have the same kind of magic as the mom's, and there are chants/prayers/incantations to the gods that allow the magic to flow. Simple enough. However, the incantations end up getting a bit tricky later on in the book. For one, we pretty much always see Zelie using incantations when she calls her magic, but some of the other magic-using characters are never mentioned as using incantations. While some of them, like Zélie, probably remember a few from before the Raid, that can't be true for all of them, especially ones who are too young or who get a power that doesn't correspond with one their parent had. So that bit felt a little rushed, but overall I liked the magic system in the book and Zélie's way of describing magic was interesting. As for Zélie herself: she's got a fire in her and she's determined to get things done, even if she sometimes doubts her abilities to lead. She balances herself quite well between being afraid of the guards and retaliation and rebellion, and generally seems to keep a good balance, though I do have to agree with Tzain that sometimes she does stuff without thinking. I particularly liked how much joy she took from her diviner/maji heritage and her awareness that simply living her heritage was rebellion within itself. There was a bit toward the end where she was getting doubtful about magic which was kind of confusing since she'd also used magic to fight and for more debatable reasons, but whatever. Overall I liked her character. With Amari I was kind of lost at first as to how people could call her a badass, but I definitely get it now. I'll will admit that I didn't and still don't see how she and Zelie are such great friends. Friends, definitely. But best friends? I don't think they're there yet. Something I definitely appreciate about Amari was how willing she was to learn. Some of the things she came into contact with once outside the palace scared her, but she was open to explanations and other perspectives, which was great considering her upbringing (and considering Inan's chapters). I feel like Amari really came into herself in the second half of the book. She finally gets a chance to fight for something she believes in and I think it helped transform her character from someone who shied away from the blade she knew how to use to someone who would wield a sword to defend herself and others. I could definitely see her becoming a commander of some kind in the future, though I'm not entirely sure if 'queen' suits her (I am not entirely certain the title 'ruler' suits anyone in this book). Inan is the last POV character and he was...he was a lot. Amari and Zelie are definitely my favorites, but Inan is someone I could probably do with having less page time. This boy has zero convictions of his own and is completely unable to look past his nose. Unlike Amari, he continues to believe his father's words even traveling around and doesn't really spare a second thought to how reality might actually be. The one thing I'll say in his defense is that Amari did have Binta growing up and was able to see that at least one diviner wasn't bad, which I do think helped for her to generalize this idea to other diviners/maji, whereas Inan didn't have a figure like that in his life. But enough of that. Inan is wishy-washy and swings one way then the other (though never completely all the way), and he is far too willing to return to his old ideals when things get challenging or scary. I mean, for fuck's sake he isn't even really the one suffering most of these times and is still all too ready to give up. Like, please grow a spine, buddy. I do think Adeyemi actually did a really good job of writing Inan in the sense that she manages to capture the effects abuse and gaslighting and show just how much of an effect those things can have on your psyche. So in that sense Inan was a 'good' character, but I don't think he's a good person nor do I like him. Tzain was someone whom I felt was in the background for a lot of the book. He supports Zelie and is willing to go off with her to do all these things and protects her and stands by her even when she fucks up. He is also able to be nice to Amari despite her being the princess and the daughter of the man who caused a lot of his problems. From what we do see of him Tzain seems to have a good sense of humor and is funny at times. He's also clearly holding in a lot of pain, trauma, and responsibility, though he rarely shows it. I definitely think he feels responsible for his father and Zelie and that whenever something bad happens to either of them he feels guilty, even if there was nothing he could've done. While he blames Zélie for a lot of things, which I don't like AT ALL but at the same time understand needing to direct your anger somewhere, I get the feeling he's mostly blaming himself. In terms of relationships. Someone please explain to me why there needed to be any in this book in the first place? Inan and Zélie are the main pairing, which is just dumb af since he wants to kill her for almost the entirety of the book then, after like two whole days of being together, they decide everything's fine and dandy and start kissing. I side with Tzain on this one, even if his phrasing wasn't great. I'll be honest, the Zélie and Inan's whole relationship just confuses me. I don't understand why they like each other other than 'insta-love' and I don't understand 1) why Zélie's willing to Risk It All after Inan being nice for two days, and 2) why she's willing to continue the relationship after what happens with Saran. Perhaps my biggest issue with them is Inan's so-called love wherein he thinks taking away magic will protect Zélie...completely ignoring the fact that part of Zélie is magic. *SPOILER, SKIP TO NEXT PARAGRAPH TO AVOID* That complete and utter dumbass doesn't seem to connect the fact that he stopped feeling Zélie's soul when Zélie stopped feeling magic. Like? Brains? No brains here. *SPOILER END* Okay, moving on. Tzain and Amari have better prospects for romance. Adeyemi set them up from the very beginning, even if Tzain might've initially seen her as a pretty face. They grow to like and respect for one another and I feel like their relationship could actually go somewhere. But why, why oh why does Adeyemi make Amari mention the L-word? Like, honey, you are not in love with this boy after only knowing him a week. Crush, sure. Love, no. But that matters not, since there is at least the potential. Actually, something re: relationships that I felt Adeyemi kind of brushed over (and it seems like other reviews also had this same thought) has to do with Amari. She is very much coded to be bi and it's written as if she and Binta had a romantic relationship, but Adeyemi never follows through with this. I honestly thought that Amari and Zelie were going to be the main pairing of the book at first, or failing that that Amari would have feelings for Zélie, Zélie wouldn't reciprocate, then Amari would move on to another female character. But nope. Nada. I mean, Tzain's good too, but it's just weird the way the whole thing with Amari's romantic interest(s) was/were written. Now onto something else: the throne. While becoming the next ruler isn't an outright object for either Inan or Amari (or anyone else), being heir definitely sits on Inan's shoulders and drives a lot of what he does. Likewise, Amari comes to the realization that if she were the next on the throne she could help the diviners/maji and overturn the laws and the system that her father created. The current king, Saran, sucks all around and definitely doesn't deserve his head being attached to his body. But we already knew that. The point is, Inan is clearly not good for Orïsha because he can't form his own convictions and leans solely on what he's been taught to think is right. He does, however, think he is the only person who can keep Orïsha safe and protected. Amari, on the other hand, knows she won't be queen and doesn't seem to really want to be queen until she realized what that could mean for what she believes in. However, and there's always a 'however,' she also kind of has Mad Queen Energy about her at times after she makes this decision. She is, in my opinion, also not a great contender for the throne. As mentioned, I think she'd make a great general, but there's something about her that makes me hesitate before supporting her bid for the throne. Do I think she'd be better than Saran or Inan? Absolutely. But probably so would Yemi, that doesn't mean she should get the throne. Perhaps I am merely feeling particularly democratic today, but I don't believe an absolute monarch will help Orïsha. If we are being realistic, I don't even know if a democratic one would either, but power in the hands of a diverse many would probably be better than power in the hands of one. Overall I enjoyed the story. I thought the plot was good and I enjoyed going with the characters as they (mostly) struggled to get magic back. Inan served to be a good character for demonstrating how our childhood can influence the kind of people we become and also serves as a nice foil to Amari, who has decided to be the opposite of her brother. Zélie is a good character to follow since she's so alive. She's got so much rage and love and fear and fire that pushes her every step of the way and helps her overcome so many things. I knocked off half a star for the frivolous reason that I don't like Inan and Zélie's romance and don't think it was necessary for the book. I'll be honest, the book was great, it was tough for me to put down even when I needed to, but for some reason I just don't have any desire to find out what happens in the next one. It's a bit like A Song of Wraiths and Ruin like that for me. I just...don't feel it. I don't think it has anything to do with either book since I couldn't make myself finish reading a new book by one of my favorite authors even though I was enjoying it so...just that kind of year, I suppose.

[magic-fluffie-boyes]

Hello! I’m not sure if your asks are open still (please disregard this or disregard this if this would not be healthy for you to write currently!) but your fic with Mammon and Beel’s responses to an MC who has anorexia was really therapeutic to read, and I was wondering if you could do a few more reactions (with any character you feel like)?

It’s been a while since I’ve even looked at my ask box on any account, but I saw the notification for this one, and… I dunno, some cord inside of me was hit just right. It’s more than likely that my own condition has gotten worse and I need the therapeutic comfort too… whatever it is I need to thank you for giving me a chance to allow myself to enjoy doing this again. As for my other nonnie who initially requested Luci and Asmo, (whose ask will be answered after this), thank you too, I’m glad that I can be sort of help and comfort for a condition that isn’t really acknowledged enough.

⚠️TW: Annorexia; Mentions of body image issues; Bad grammar⚠️

Lucifer

⭐️ Lucifer prides himself on knowing much about the human condition, despite not fully understanding it; and he prides himself on knowing his darling exchange student very well… but this...

⭐️ He doesn’t notice it at first, mostly because he doesn’t care to notice at first. Themskipping out on a few meals is a bit annoying, but nothing too concerning to him as they seemed healthy -- happy even.

⭐️ He does acknowledge it is… a bit unnatural… not what they should be doing, but so long as they are healthy there should be no issues.

⭐️ However, it gets to the point where they’re skipping multiple meals in a day, and they look pale and tired all the time. They hardly have the energy to do much anymore, and they’re most definitely falling behind in their classes from how distracted they are.

⭐️ He tried to step in then, but they just told him that they were fine, and began a semi-normal eating routine again… his pride wouldn’t allow him to press any further when there wasn’t much reason to.

⭐️ It wasn’t until Satan walked into his office one day, clearly riled up and very upset with him that he realized the gravity of the situation.

⭐️ Satan explained to him what they were doing was seriously harming their body and health, and that it needed to be dealt with unless he wanted to see his darling human fade away before his very eyes.

⭐️ That is when he decided to step in because he may not know many things about humans -- not that he would admit that -- but if Satan was seeking out his help in such a fashion it must be serious.

⭐️ So he takes them aside and asks them to explain it to him, because how could they neglect such an essential part of their health? Why would they do this to themselves? There had to be a logical explanation...

⭐️ When they do explain, he’s left a bit confused, and a bit upset at himself. He could’ve done something about this from the beginning, or at least stopped it from developing so severely… but of course, he didn’t, and there’s nothing he can do but help them get better now.

⭐️ He starts by reintroducing them to food via having his brothers and himself cook up food that he knows they like, staying at the dinner table with them until they finish their plate entirely.

⭐️ He also begins taking time out of his work to listen to them and better understand their situation, while also quietly assuring them that they are not alone, he is there and he always will be.

⭐️ He takes everything on himself because it’s, in his eyes at least, the best way to deal with such an issue. If he can watch over everything, he can be sure that they are taking great care of themselves.

⭐️ And, of course, he assures them that their body is only a small fraction of what makes them his human. No matter if they were underweight, overweight, anorexic, or not he loves them and he always will.

⭐️ His pride may get in his way sometimes, but when his human is involved he will always find a way to overcome it and care for them as they need.

Asmodeus

🌸 Asmo is more than likely one of the first brothers to notice -- or acknowledge he notices -- just after Mammon and Satan, who notice near immediately.

🌸 However, they seem to at least be eating a bit, and their personality and beauty still shone brightly to all of them, so there really shouldn’t be any reason to worry… right? Right?

🌸 He doesn’t want to bother them if nothing is wrong, because as long as they’re a healthy weight they’re doing fine, so he doesn’t have to worry at all!

🌸 No, the truth of the matter is Asmo is worried, seriously worried about them. Eating too much wasn’t good for the body, but eating too little was even worse in his opinion. The physical effects were so much more damming to them, and it was so scary to watch it happen.

🌸 He notices that they’re a few sizes smaller than they usually would be, their complexion is sickly and pale, and their eye bags and little marks that would normally be unnoticeable seemed to stand out on their skin.

🌸 They weren’t looking good, needless to say, and it made him panic a bit. He didn’t want to see his adorable human rot away from something that could be helped.

🌸 As someone who, in the past, had struggled to find a balanced way to keep up healthy body weight and shape that satisfied his perfectionist mindset, he understood what they were going through better than any of his brothers.

🌸 Which is why he doesn’t let it go further than skipping a few meals before he decided to step in. He doesn’t want them to suffer through this kind of thing any longer than they already have, he just wants them to be happy and feel loved.

🌸 So, of course, he has a spa night. Just the two of them talking and having fun together where no one could bother them, and that’s when he asks them what’s been going on. And he listens intensively to every word they have to say, wanting to understand what they’re going through more than anything.

🌸 After they’re done, Asmo wordlessly brings them into a hug, allowing them to cry or calm down or just think for a moment about what they just admitted before Asmo said anything to them. He just wanted them to know that this feeling was okay and that they shouldn’t be ashamed to feel.

🌸 He spends the rest of the night making them feel loved -- no not like that -- telling them how beautiful they are, how much he loves them, and how much he thinks they deserve from the world.

🌸 After that he wakes them up early so they can devise an eating plan that they think would work well for them because they shouldn’t be starving their body of the essential nutrients that it needs. And they work for a very long time on this plan because they deserve nothing but the best, and Asmo is damn determined to give that to them.

🌸 With him its constant affection and reassurance that they’re doing great, even if they skipped a meal or messed up a bit Asmo is right there to figure out what went wrong and assure them that they can do better next time

🌸 Overall he’s surprisingly gentle and caring with the situation, wanting more than anything to make them know that they’re loved and they can get through this by themselves, if not with a little encouragement from him and his brothers.

Belphegor

🐄 He is absolutely the last of the brothers to notice and the last one to take action, partly because he genuinely didn’t notice a change in behavior and partly because he thinks that someone else will deal with it so he doesn’t have to.

🐄 Of course things don’t go in his favor, none of his brothers know how to deal with this kind of situation, or they all think since they’re his human he should be the one to deal with it… and… yeah fair, but it seemed like a bother.

🐄 Yeah, Belphegor isn’t the most… sensitive to this issue… he’s actually pretty damn rude about it for a long time. He doesn’t get it, “If you need to eat then eat, don’t starve yourself for no reason, you stupid human.”

🐄 He only gets worried when he notices that their physical appearance has changed because if even he is noticing then it’s getting to a point where things need to change and they need to change fast.

🐄 Only problem? Belphie doesn’t really know what to do about it, he’s never really dealt with things like this. He and Beel had never had issues with their appearances or their eating habits -- well Beel was a special case in that regard.

🐄 So, surprise, Belphie takes time away from napping to do some research on this stuff, because while he thinks it’s dumb he does want his stupid little human to take care of themselves, or else he wouldn’t have a stupid little human to love.

🐄 With a bare minimum understanding of the disorder and a genuine want to help, Belphie decided to ask them about what was bothering them so much that they weren’t eating the nice food everyone was making for them.

🐄 Well, to say he was annoyed with their answer would be an understatement, he was angry. How could they think so little of themselves, he wouldn’t be so infatuated with them if he thought so little of them.

🐄 He assures them that their body size shouldn’t matter at all, because that’s not why he likes them in the first place, albeit a bit rudely.

🐄 His approach to it is aggressive but loving and a bit annoyed at the thought of them not taking care of themselves. He just wants them to be happy and healthy that’s all, he just doesn’t know how to express that in normal ways.

🐄 He asks his brothers for help, especially Satan and Beel, since he trusts that they would have a better understanding for such a topic than he ever could.

🐄 Beel helps by setting up a workout and sort of introducing them to foods slowly again, he’s by far more gentle than Belphegor with this kind of stuff and has a much better way of reassuring them.

🐄 As for Satan, he’s just more educated on this and Belphegor goes to him for advice on how to help more. What’s the best types of foods, what kinds of ways can i reassure them? stuff like that.

🐄 Overall the approach is lazy, sloppy, and a bit harsh, but it’s clear that he’s doing his best and just wants them to be happy in the end all.

Thank you. Hope you enjoyed.

[mcustorm]

45 M/M Gay Movies, Ranked

The other day I bit the bullet and decided to watch Brokeback Mountain for the first time. All I knew about that movie was that it was basically the CMBYN of yesteryear and somebody got killed with a tire iron. Anyways, so I finish the movie and realize that I’ve seen a *lot* of gay movies, especially in the last couple of years. So here are my rankings according to nothing but my personal preference. I won’t write about all of them, but you can ask about something if I leave it out.

I wish I could give you a rubric for this. The reality is, there are some radically different movies on this list with different tones and intentions. There’s buddy comedies, tearjerkers, small indie features, big theater releases. So trying to rank them all is TUFF.

The Way He Looks - Such a beautiful coming-of-age movie. Maybe the 2nd one I saw on this list? Perfect length, perfect characterization, simple yet compelling, clever. And nothing feels better than reaching a happy ending (for once, because some of these movies’ endings-- SHEESH) that’s been earned. It just hasn’t been topped.

2. God’s Own Country

3. Pride

4. Kanarie - Yea, we don’t talk about this movie enough. It’s one of the most recent that I’ve seen. Beautiful. The way that it references apartheid and the war to reflect the protagonist’s feelings? Flawless.

5. Jongens - The first movie that I saw on this list, gets many a bonus point for that.

6. Moonlight - Yes, I am black. Yes, I understand this movie may be too low. Moonlight kind of scares me. In general, there’s not nearly enough discourse surrounding this one for me. But while it’s not exactly a popcorn-muncher, to me it’s the most personal movie on the list. When I look at Chiron and all that he’s been through, I can’t help but draw parallels to my own story up to this point. It holds a mirror up to me in a way that no other movie on this list does. That makes me uncomfortable.

But it is so poetic. Have you guys seen the script for this? The directing, the SOUNDTRACK, the acting. Phenomenal. 

7. Weekend

8. Call Me By Your Name - Yes, I am aware of people’s beef with this one. Yes, I understand a lot of people may feel this one is overrated. While I do think this one gets worse on rewatch, the truth is, it’s not really *that* overrated because hot take: most (meaning over half) of the movies on this list range somewhere from “just okay” to “painstakingly bad”.

It’s the score, the cinematography, the subtext in most all of the dialogue, the acting, the way that you can smell the apricots through the fucking screen. People who say this movie is a vacation ad are fucking CORRECT. One of my biggest gripes however is that it’s too fucking long. And uh, that age difference...

And Armie Hammer’s a weirdo...

9. Dating Amber* - Dating Amber has one of those “Duh” premises that sounds like it could’ve been done like 30 times before yet I can’t think of any other examples of it. So what you’d think would be a wacky premise actually turns out to be a frankly poignant movie with an emotional story arc for the main two characters.

10. Hello Stranger: The Movie* - This movie, which is the first sequel (sorta) on the list, frankly had no business being as good as it was. Even though the web series is required viewing, I felt the movie fixed like all of the series’ issues: pacing, lack of compelling drama, the awkward quarantine format. The drama and stakes are there without us having to visit Angst City. And the theme and the ending reprise is HEAT.

11. Uncle Frank* -  Uncle Frank is like The Help of gay movies. Like The Help, it’s *overall* a short, sweet and fluffy movie set decades ago. Like The Help, you’ll still come out of it feeling pretty good even though it has some dark moments. Also like The Help, you’ll wonder after the fact if the central white girl absolutely needed to be so...well, central for this story to be told. Bonus points for Paul Bettany and Character Actress Margo Martindale.

12. Brokeback Mountain - Tragic.

13. Moffie - Set during the South African border war, same as Kanarie. You even hear the word “moffie” throughout Kanarie. Anyways, this is a war movie for the gays, and a very intense watch. I liked that it was a much more realistic view of what a soldier endured during that period, and of course on the flip side I thought it was more thorough in its depiction of the rampant racism. I gotta find a good book on this era.

14. A Moment In the Reeds

15. Get Real - Maybe the most out of place movie on the list. I need to rewatch it. I do recall absolutely loving the score, however. Like, I fucks with this:

16. Freier Fall - When I finished Brokeback I was like, “Wait, wasn’t that just Free Fall with extra steps?” And yea, it kinda is. But even discount Brokeback is still pretty good.

17. Beautiful Thing - There are few things to like about this one, the relationship between the two guys, the mother’s love for her son even though it’s not all rainbows, that nice little final scene. I did not care for the dark-skinned woman being portrayed as, you know, the drug abusing, school dropout, gossipy, butt of jokes neighbor. But that guy really looks like Tom Holland tho.

18. Love, Simon - It’s at this point that I move from “Yea, that movie is good, you should watch it!” to “Look, you may like it, you may not.”

19. The 10 Year Plan - This movie is so fucking cheesy that there was cheddar coming though my speakers. But when I think of “Hallmark/Lifetime, but for the gays” this is the crown jewel. There’s some other movies on this list that could’ve taken some notes.

20. The Christmas Setup* - The trend of fluffy-white-gay-cable-network-movie continues and in good form. It’s not deep. It’s not really thought provoking. It’s cute. Fran Drescher is there. You should watch it.

21. Giant Little Ones

22. Hidden Kisses

23. Alex Strangelove - In a unique twist, the emotional core of this one is arguably between Alex and his girlfriend. All that ends up happening, however, is we the viewer keep wanting more Alex/Elliott scenes; those are the most electric in the whole movie. The end result is a hot yet endearing mess.

24. Fair Haven

25. The Thing About Harry - Freeform’s attempt at making a cheesy rom-com for the gays. It’s...okay. I personally feel like the main character’s friend is highkey trifling but it’s whatever.

26. Your Name Engraved Herein* - So I guess I’ve decided I officially hate angst. I mean, I get how it’s often necessary to tell an effective story, but I’m just not here for 2 hour indie angst fests that get passed off as “high art” anymore. I cannot do it. Somehow this is Brokeback’s fault...there just has to be a better way to tell gay stories in the 2020′s. Anyways, the last song was fuego.

27. The Perfect Wedding - Easily the most bizarre movie on this list. It’s so bad, I liked it a lot.

28. Naz and Maalik - The first half of the movie with the two leads just riffing is some pretty great stuff. The back half starts throwing plot developments that are just less than interesting.

29. My Best Friend

30. The Curiosity of Chance

31. Being 17 - Boring. Angsty.

32. And Then We Danced

33. Center of My World - Has some of the most trifling characters EVER. I was so angry. This movie for me has *0* rewatchability.

34. Just Friends

35. 4th Man Out - This movie was basically “a bro/Hangover-style movie, but for the gays.” I absolutely love the intention, but the execution was a little shoddy. One day we’re gonna get a flawless movie that nails what this movie was going for. I hope we remember this movie whenever that day comes.

36. Latter Days - So fucking preachy. 

37. GBF - Another bizarre one, but at least this movie gets how wacky it is.

38. Beach Rats

39. Shelter - I’ve noticed a lot of people like this one. To that I say...yikes. Remember that scene from Family Guy where Peter says he doesn’t care for The Godfather? I did not care for Shelter. It insists upon itself (not really, but still).

40. Handsome Devil

41. Esteros - It’s at this point of the list that we shift from “Movies that are the definition of ‘ight’ “ to “These movies are bad. Bad. BAAAAAD.”

42. Monster Pies

43. Were the World Mine - I couldn’t even finish it. Wanna watch a better musical? Go watch Kanarie. Wanna watch a better Shakespeare adaptation? The Lion King is the movie for you, or even fucking She’s the Man.

44. North Sea Texas - So boring. I actually think this one may need a rewatch, because I swear it shouldn’t have been as terrible as it was.

45. Salvation Army - I have no idea what this movie was going for. I understand that it is autobiographical, however...it simultaneously barely has any plot or character developments. This one has shades of Beach Rats, but it’s significantly worse, and I didn’t even like Beach Rats that much.

So that’s it, thanks if you made it down this far. I guess I’ll update the list as I inevitably watch more of these. I would love movie recommendations! 

[raquellplanningwell]

THIS ARCANA PROLOGUE UPDATE WHOOO 🙌✨

TL:DR I loved it, it made the game even better, s/o to the creators for going back to it because I really think it makes SUCH a difference & develops the characters so beautifully, especially the three newer love interests, so many pleasant surprises throughout this play-through.  Longer Verison (If you’re up to it, please enjoy!)

Okay so when I say I’ve been aching for the creators to fix up the prologue I really mean it & this was beyond satisfying, like better than I could imagine.

There’s so many effective changes & they didn’t just fix one or two things here, they went INNN. The format has changed, things that were consistent in the story before are now in line & are much stronger with this new prologue.

Listen, I’ve tried to get multiple friends to play the Arcana & more than one have stopped at the prologue because it didn’t grasp them, this, this is a huge improvement & I got so hyped playing it.

Starting off even how Asra’s introduced feels so much smoother, not just a story thrown on you. The lost memories are mentioned & Asra delicately treats the apprentice, you see how he worries & care about them. Plus with this fun option, there’s a new chance to give your character some more personality, I love it. The Trouble option was worth it 👌🏻

Truth be told I haven’t played the prologue in a while, so perhaps some details I’m re-appreciating from the previous version but I love that they went back & changed it, like that to me, shows how much they still care, & that the creators genuinely want to improve & nurture their game

Okay changes to Nadia introduction, ALSO GREAT, @ devs thank you for not just having the apprentice follow her blindly !! Like she explains the situation & lets the apprentice know exactly why she’s calling on their services right off the bat. Another detail I liked, is Nadia showing some vulnerability in this time, there’s a description of her sleepless eyes as well & I really like that! Like she’s not just the countess, she’s a person coming to you for help.

Portia’s intro is in there!! Bless!!! My girl finally being put out as a main & I JUST CAME TO THE REALIZATION THAT MEANS SHE’S STAYING YAAAAAAAYY, VERY EXCITING STUFF 🎊🍾

This is gonna a long post, if you’re still reading, thank you as well. So next is Julian’s entrance, I appreciate the options that from my knowledge stayed the same in how you react & I choose ‘negotiate’ as my own apprentice would & the details were great lol like this breakdown from the apprentice 👇 yup that sounds like the dumbass doctor alright

Another nice detail, they exchange names earlier! The apprentice states their name when they first meet & Julian is even surprised when the apprentice doesn’t know his. And!! These warnings that come from the love interests in the beginning, that’re new characters at first, they’re not so ominous! Isn’t that awesome, like they make so much more sense with the story & who the characters are & what they know.

Like this ^ right here ^^ that is phenomenal. The wording makes sense, what he’s talking about makes more sense as you get to play the game, like it’s how it’s meant to be. Before I believe his warning was about how the “witch” cares about the MC but that they shouldn’t trust him & more than anything that made me feel confused about who to choose & what was true, even in a prologue so this change is very welcomed.

The portion with the voice in the dream & being able to pick whether to follow it or not, super glad about that like those feel like meaningful choices & even the dream scene being added, so cool! I’m assuming as of now the voice was Lucio & I think it was really well played

Muriel’s CG, I really yelled. when I say it’s incredible, like CRAZY GOOD, I mean it. The lighting, the mood, even the angle because yes he will likely be towering over the apprentice & that’s a lovely thing to consider, also his expression is so good & yes! No strange warning that sounds out of character to his route, it starts off with “...” as it should, the most Muriel line.

Even the way it’s described matches up so well lol like yes you can see you’re definitely engulfed in his shadow, he looks huge. Plus “and I look up… and up.. and up” is very funny. Again the fact that his first lines are “…” that’s perfect. I feel like the Grinch when he’s auditioning Max for Rudolph, he says nothing & throws off the nose & the Grinch goes “BRILLIANT”, that’s me. Like even Muriel stumbling back & having trouble saying anything is great. It’s how he is throughout the story, & especially in his own route, he has trouble talking to the apprentice. I’m uwuing at the stuttering too, baby, just a glimpse into what he’s gonna be like in his route & that’s a good intro in its own! 👏 This is like world’s improvement. Also if you’re still with me bless, thank you for being here & congratulations. I’m thinking of breaking this down in parts as I didn’t expect it to go so long but here we are & enjoying each minute of it.

*taps microphone* The use of the word, “bamboozled” thank you for your time.

I can’t believe this is now in the prologue, I am giddy

OKAY! Into the market we go, & Portia is introduced! She introduces herself! We don’t just accidentally bump into her! & she’s with the baker! Very cool! OKAYYYYY, lol mind you I’m typing my reaction as I play, & Portia already showing her interest in the MC being a magician like she does throughout her route, noice. She’s so cute, & you get to ask about herself right off the bat, really enjoying these changes, they add so much to the characters. It might just be me but there’s more sound effects too? The cards shuffling, the gate opening. I also really like that the charm is mentioned again. Like feels more tangible than how it was before, I wasn’t even sure we had hung onto it before & now it feels like a personal item that can actually protect the apprentice & connect them to something more.

Next Chapter, really liking how clear things are right off the bat. In the old prologue, I remember being unsure about Nadia’s relationship to Lucio, but here it seems quite apparent they don’t share the same tastes, & the apprentice gets a moment to take it all in. THE VOICEEEE, Oh that’s an awesome addition. Also @ devs thank you for mentioning some compensation for the apprentice as well. Playing the game, it’s clear Nadia takes good care of them but yeah in the beginning it was very much like, ‘why am I doing this again other than you being Countess and asking me personally’, I appreciate it. And Devorak isn’t just described as the dude who confesses, he’s introduced as the apprentice’s first lead in this investigating, awesome!! I don’t recall this from the previous prologue but we’re actually discussing more of the murder mystery of this, I definitely think this is one of the Arcana’s strong points & I’m glad they’ve added to it. The story & world building potential for this game extends infinitely. The way that the dinner with Nadia has been built upon & improved, it feels meaningful. It makes me like her even more as character, like she’s not just a political power, she’s a person trying to figure this all out, do what’s best for her people & bring them together, as well she makes the goals in this investigation very clear.

Portiaaaaa, I like that you get the chance to ask her more & she shows you more, the CG is so nice & suits her so well!! & the situation is a perfect intro to what to expect while in the palace, because that happens a lot, secret passages in just about every route, Lucio even mentions it himself in his own route how there’s so many about the palace grounds. But Portia telling you a ghost story in the Count’s wing is right on brand & I think it prepares you well for the first chapter of her route. I know I wasn’t expecting going straight for ghost hunting when I started her route.

There’s a ‘snoop around’, option now. I choose it & wow it’s a great time, tea & snacks with Nadia & Portia, bless. The scene is so fun & almost feels like a tale, like it feels special & you get to enjoy more of the love interests personalities. The mention of pepi is sweet. + the use of puns, 10/10 I love my girlfriend ✨

Nadia’s note, a lovely touch.

IV The Emeperor

The nightmares, woah!!!! Okay this !! this is super effective. When I first played the game I remember bring confused who the blond guy was, why his eyes were red, why he was even an option if he was the count that passed away but the nightmares & how they introduce him really feels full circle. It’s so cool getting the choice to interact in the dream as well, I keep finding myself impressed & amazed with these new additions. Hdbshsk he really said “What’s the matter? Goat got your tongue”. A legend, dedicated to his aesthetic 🙌

Asra’s talk in the fountain, mentioning Julian, much better. I remember last time it was him not speaking kindly of the doctor behind his back & now its more, ‘it is what it is, please be careful’ like ‘yes, thank you for the trust’. It looks better on their character when they’re a little more open & honest about the other, than to vaguely bad mouth each other. Perhaps I don’t remember it correctly but I think Asra used to call him Ilya right away & I know that caused some confusion for me in the beginning, so introducing like this is 👍 👍 👍

MALAK POPPING IN, LOOK AT THIS GOLD, & more notes!! Yes!!! Very cool, MC is just going out seeking the truth too, as they ought to be. Also Julian’s trust in Malak is astounding lmfao. 

I will say it’s very strange to take out the letter desk option but it seems like it’s good overall. The fcking Fylnn Rider moment, they’re not subtle! “They just can’t get my nose right!” 😂 something about this new dialogue feels more intimate or real, like lol yes Julian makes such a good point the apprentice could’ve just called the guards in there, that’d make sense for them to do so but they give Julian a chance & trust him, because they want to go after the truth. I gotta say I’m surprised the CG works so well even with the new content, like they got the mood just spot on.

I’m just speeding through Julian’s convo at this point getting really into it & wow soon Portia’s there then Muriel, ‘what the fuck is going on’, I said aloud at this point. I gotta say, as much as I’m loving hearing all these details right in the beginning, it got me thinking they’re things that’re revealed later. When Julian “breaks up” with the apprentice in his route, he explains the plague, like it really has got me wondering if they’re gonna adjust the rest of the story, to not avoid repetition. THE MURIEL INTERACTION HERE IS SO GOOD, I LIVE. There’s also another paid option with Muriel, this is GREAT & for some reason they’ve been already unlocked to me. (I’m guessing it’s because I had a prologue scene with Julian & a few books acquired) but either way I’m very grateful. Muriel is the best baby & honestly this is really introducing his character so nicely, him walking you, him questioning that you didn’t run away knowing about the ghosts, works well with his route’s path, all while maintaining the “Go away!” “B-but not too close!” tsundere preciousness, GOOD SHT. lastly I love that instead of saying “don’t trust the witch” they show you that Asra hasn’t told you certain events throughout the prologue, with Muriel & Julian being surprised that he wouldn’t mention these things to you.

Pure

Okay so all done! Thoughts, I love that they went back to it, I’m curious to see if they’ll do anything else with it but the changes are very welcomed, I think they’ve improved it greatly. I will say it’d be nice to be able to maneuver through the prologue’s chapters but honestly that update was so remarkable, I’m very grateful.

[steppedoffaflight]

Summer’s a Knife - Chapter 7

Catch up on Chapter 6 here

To reward Van for his vulnerability you send him a video of your hand underneath the lace, your fingers moving against yourself. It felt good, sure, but most importantly it filmed good. Van seems to think so, too, judging by his next video.

You sigh in amusement at his enthusiasm. You forget how easy riling up men can be.

Maybe you’d cut someone else off at this point, but Van’s eagerness was endearing. You continue to send him videos of you touching yourself, playing up some soft moans into the microphone. After a few exchanges Van sends a video of his grand finale, complete with his own noises in the background. It’s the one bit out of everything you wish you could’ve saved.

Faking an orgasm is strictly against the rules, so you decide to close off snapchat, coming back to your texts with him instead. In an exhilarated rush you let your glasses of wine do the typing as you send Hope that makes London more bearable.

or

As always, Mary keeps you out of your comfort zone.

Word count: ~5.6k

Chapter Seven May 2019

Van leaves for the U.K. only days after your accident. You insist on being the one to drop him off at the airport, waking up barely past midnight on a workday in order to get him to LAX for his six AM flight. He’d fought tooth-and-nail against you being the one to take him, insisting on catching a ride with one of the other boys, but to be honest you’d wanted to see him one last time. You wanted to reassure him that you were a normal, functioning person, and not the traumatized mess he’d seen that night. 

He’d given you a tight hug over the console as the car idled on the curb in front of his terminal before getting out and grabbing his bags, heading into the hustle and bustle of the airport. You don’t take off immediately but Van doesn’t look back. You watch him examine his phone through the glass doors before he shuffles off, rolling his suitcase behind him. 

For the first time, you don’t have to wonder if you’ll see Van again. You’re absolutely certain you will, considering you drive away from the airport in his Range Rover. 

It’s weird how comfortable you become driving it. You do have to text Van occasionally through the week with questions, but eventually you’ve made yourself right at home, going so far as to even set some of your own radio station presets. Hopefully he doesn’t mind, but you’d tried to listen to his and it just wasn’t your style. At this rate your indie-rock repertoire consisted of only Catfish and the one Sam Fender song you’d listened to after meeting him. And you were okay with that. 

Mary has you come over Friday after work for a girl’s night. She insists it’s because Theo is headed to a bachelor party and she’ll be bored alone, but you get the feeling she’s been worried about you since your accident. She texts you more often than usual, asking about your muscle stiffness and the cut on your thigh. It’d been infected, but cleared up quickly with some first aid ointment you’d had around the house. You were still banged up and had some nasty bruises, but overall you felt lucky things hadn’t been worse. 

The plans tonight are tame, a sure sign of Mary’s worry. While she’d usually jump on a girl’s night as an opportunity to head to a club, something you two haven’t done in forever, she insists on renting a movie and changing into pajamas as soon as you’re over. You have chinese delivered for dinner, and wash it down with a bottle of wine Mary had carefully selected for this evening. You two watch a comedy as you eat your food straight out of the paper containers, something funny about divorced women who decide to take a road trip and make impulsive decisions. 

The whole living room rings out in shrieks of pain when one of the characters decides to get a bikini wax. You both cringe but can’t take your eyes off of the screen. 

“God, remember when I got that wax?” Mary winces.

You remember it vividly, even though it was years ago. Mary had just started dating someone new and during your brow appointments she spur of the moment decided to get a brazillian wax done. One thing you appreciated about Mary’s boldness was your ability to learn from her mistakes; You know now that you will never, ever get a wax. 

“I could never, ever, forget,” You tell her somberly as you recall the memory. She had waited until you were done with your brow wax so that you could be in the room with her, holding her hand. It had been traumatic for you both.

“He didn’t even care,” Mary shakes her head in distaste. “All that pain for nothing. He didn’t say one word about it when we fucked the next time.”

She spends a moment simmering in her anger before she shrugs, the clouds clearing. “It made for some great nudes, though. I used them when I first started talking to Theo and he still has them saved to this day.”

“No way? Even with recent ones?” 

“What recent ones,” Mary snorts. “I haven’t sent him any in forever. He keeps asking but it’s like, I have to be in a certain mood, you know?”

You nod in understanding. “For sure. I’m never in the mood to photograph myself in fluorescent bathroom lighting.”

“Right, exactly!” Mary takes a long drink of her wine, finishing off her glass. “Now that I have a dimmer in the bathroom, though, it’s so much nicer. Turn it down to a nice glow, ugh.” She gives a chef’s kiss to the air. “So nice.”

She refills her wine glass, topping yours up without being asked. Your attention drifts back to the movie.

“I should take some new ones,” Mary muses.

“You should,” You encourage her.

“No, like, right now,” She says suddenly, sitting up. “I never have the house to myself. I should take some to send to Theo. Gotta keep his eyes off of the strippers, you know.”

You scoff at the idea that Theo would pay anyone else besides Mary a glance. He was head over heels for her. But you can see that Mary’s been hit with an unstoppable lightning bolt of inspiration, already shuffling her blanket aside so she can stand up.

“You gotta help me.” She hits pause on the movie, effectively changing the course of the night. “You always get my angles right.”

You sigh, but know there’s no use in arguing. You start to get up as well.

“I’ll grab more wine,” Mary says cheerfully, bouncing away towards the kitchen. 

“You should take some for your man, too!” She calls from the other room.

You let out a dry laugh. “I don’t have a man.”

“Sure you do,” Mary smirks as she reenters the living room with an unopened bottle of wine, “You’re driving his Range Rover, aren’t you?”

“I’m driving my friend’s Range Rover,” You reply. “He was very clear that we are friends.”

“But he’s a friend that would appreciate a nice pic of you.”

“I’m sure he would. But I’m in the ugliest underwear ever, anyway.” You flash her the overworn pair you had on that was probably overdue to be thrown out. 

“I have so many cute pairs!”

“We are not the same size!”

“Sure we are!” Mary has started her trip upstairs, and you follow along with both of your wine glasses. “You can fit my underwear for sure!”

“But not your bras!” Your ribcage was definitely wider than Mary’s.

“We can finesse them,” She insists. “We just need some safety pins. Or a hair tie. I dunno, but we’ll make it work.”

Mary’s place included a stunning walk in closet that you’ve always envied. It was attached to the master bedroom and included sets of drawers that kept all of her folded clothes organized. Theo clearly did not share your enthusiasm for the drawers, considering his clothes were in a heap on the floor underneath his hanging rack. 

“He’s disgusting,” Mary shakes her head when she sees you notice Theo’s clothes. “I can’t get him to fold a fucking shirt no matter how hard I try. He just wants to hang everything! And there’s not enough space for that!” She gestures passionately to Theo’s hanging rod, which is indeed overflowing. 

“Anyway, pick a set,” She slides open a few drawers, revealing matching bra and underwear sets. Lingerie had always been Mary’s forte. 

Mary snatches a black lace set. The bra is clearly not intended for coverage purposes, as it’s obvious from glancing at it that her nipples will show right through the lace. You carefully consider a few other bras that catch your eye, but they’re all push-ups with thick padding. Something about Mary’s sheer bra just feels like it would catch Van off guard.

“I want the set you have,” You pout, hoping she’ll politely hand it over.

“I love this set so much,” Mary sighs. “I wanted to buy two sets at the store the day I tried it on because it was so incredible, but they didn’t have another one in black and all the other colors didn’t have the same oomf, you know?” She rifles through the drawers she has open before kneeling down, opening more. 

“But they did have this one,” She presses a lacy bra into your hands. It’s identical to hers, except navy blue instead of black. “Does that work?”

You unravel the flimsy lace, marveling at how sheer it is. “Yes!”

“And for underwear,” Mary tuts, browsing her drawers again. “I don’t have the matching ones for those, but these are kinda the same color.” 

The underwear is only one shade lighter than the bra, which won’t be noticeable in pictures. The problem is that it’s a thong, with a waistband that’s meant to settle high on your hips. 

“I can’t wear these,” You sigh in disappointment when you unravel the delicate strips of fabric barely thick enough to be held together at the seams. “I look terrible in thongs.”

“Nuh-uh! High waisted thongs are totally different. Trust me! Once you get the waistband right it makes your ass look so round!”

Already your heart was sinking in anticipation of trying on ill-fitting clothes and being too discouraged to take any pictures in them. “Alright,” You sigh, not willing to argue about it. 

Mary heads back into the bedroom, shedding her pajamas before slipping into the lingerie. You follow her to the bathroom, where she plays with the dimmer while you gulp down more wine to soothe your nerves. 

“Take a pic,” Mary commands, halfheartedly posing. You do, and then she reviews it, adjusting the dimmer again as she mutters to herself.

“Another one.”

When she reviews this one, her face lights up. “Perfect,” She tells you, pressing her phone back into the palm of your hand. “Put the wine down, and let’s do this.”

Mary is stunning on camera. Taking pictures comes as easily to her as everything else. She’s not even the slightest bit shy about you being the one to take them, shamelessly sitting down on the edge of the bathtub and spreading her legs, running her fingers provocatively over her thighs. She’s right about the dim lighting making all the difference. Every photo you take of her looks sendable, even if she wrinkles her nose when she reviews them.

When she’s done she’s got a huge selection to chose from, each picture slightly different then the last. She sends one focused on her bra to Theo immediately, and saves the rest for a different time. 

“Now you!” She exclaims, excitedly clapping her hands together. 

If you were nervous in the beginning, watching Mary so flawlessly pose has definitely ruined your confidence by now. You hesitate, eyeing your chosen clothes on the bed.

“No excuses!” Mary cries when she sees your hesitation. “Didn’t you say Van was in London? What better way to keep him thinking about you then this?”

She’s right. For all you knew he could be sleeping in someone else’s bed right now.

You heave a defeated sigh, slipping off your clothes before shimmying into Mary’s. 

The bra does need some finessing, Mary cleverly linking two safety pins together to add the necessary length to the band. It’s uncomfortable but it works, and your nipples do show right through the lace as you’d intended. 

You hold your breath as you shimmy into the thong. The lace uncomfortably slips between your thighs, disappearing into your ass. You grimace down at yourself as you adjust the waistband, unhappy with the way it looks. 

“This doesn’t look right,” You sigh when you examine yourself in the bathroom mirror. 

“Come here,” Mary demands, entering the bathroom with you. Her cold fingers make you flinch as the fusses with the lace, picking at it until it’s positioned to her satisfaction. “This is how it’s supposed to look.”

When you look back in the mirror to see her handiwork, you’re stunned. Her nitpicking had worked some serious magic on the fit. She’d tugged the waistband up until it rested right below your belly button, and then had tugged the sides even higher. The high leg cut of the material revealed extra skin, successfully giving the illusion that you have a more hourglass figure with a larger ass than you actually had. 

“See?” Mary smiles at your reflection through the mirror. “Now time for the magic.”

Unfortunately, however, you are not as photogenic as Mary. Although Mary dismisses any gripes you have about the photos she’s taking, you can’t shake the gut feeling that nothing you were doing was working. You didn’t feel confident enough to send a single one of these photos to Van. You shy away from taking photos on a normal day, let alone in lingerie with someone else in the room. Eventually you grab your phone from Mary’s hands.

“This isn’t working,” You huff.

“But it is,” Mary argues, “You look incredible!”

“Okay, well maybe I need to take some alone,” You compromise. “You’re giving me stage fright!”

“How am I giving you stage fright? I’m telling you how hot you look!”

“Please,” You plead with her, “Just give me some time to try to get something halfway decent.” 

“Suit yourself,” Mary shrugs, swigging the wine on the counter straight from the bottle. “But you’re not allowed to leave until I see proof you’ve sent him one.”

With that she leaves you to it, softly closing the bathroom door behind her. 

You wish she would’ve left the wine.

Now that you’re alone, the pressure is on. You open up the camera, praying you’ll have some good luck.

Without being watched things go much smoother. Within a handful of shots you’ve gotten one that you like. You’re sitting on the edge of the bathtub, the warm glow from the mirror lights lighting up the skin on your chest. The details of the lace are visible enough, but the dark color of your nipples through the fabric steals the focus. Your hand is suggestively cupping one breast, your pointer finger dangerously close to brushing your nipple. There’s not enough light in the room to illuminate any of the background behind your body. The entire focus is on the bra, which consumes the entire faceless shot. 

The moment you feel the thrill of having taken a decent photo you take advantage of the feeling. You rush to send it to Van before you chicken out. At the very least, you’ve now satisfied Mary’s requirements and can now be released from the bathroom.

You forget exactly what the time difference is between L.A. and London, but you think it’s something significant, so Van probably wouldn’t be looking at your text right this second. But you’re still riding a wave of adrenaline, so you decide to take a few more in anticipation of his reaction. 

You try out one of Mary’s poses, legs spread open and a hand suggestively on your thigh. Taking it yourself adds something extra to the angle the way it’s looking down onto your lap, capturing your perspective. 

Your phone buzzes in your hand in the middle of snapping another pic. You almost drop your phone in surprise.

Christ, is all Van’s sent. 

Do you like it? You type back nervously.

Yeah

Van’s lack of emotion is typical, but you’re desperate to prompt something more from him tonight. You send the photo of your open thighs as a follow up.

There you go, You send underneath it with a winky face. 

Immediately the typing indicator comes up. Got any more? 

Do you have snapchat? Your heart races as you send it. 

Van’s reply is one word: his username. 

You scramble to open up snapchat, adding him immediately. He accepts you with as much eagerness. 

Say hi!, the app prompts you as soon as you two are deemed friends. You click the prompt, opening up the camera screen. 

Piggybacking off of the photo of your thighs, you dare to take a video in the same position. This time you let your fingers brush over the lace covering you, cutting off the video as soon as it looks like you’re going to tuck a fingertip under the fabric. 

As quick as it’s sent, you watch the status on the app change to opened. 

When a notification from Van suddenly appears, you tap it without a second thought.

Your gasp audibly echoes around the small room. It’s a clip of Van’s briefs, Van zooming in on the fabric in an attempt to emphasize how hard he is. There’s one that loads immediately after. He’s undressed now, jerking himself off. 

“Are you okay in there?” Mary knocks on the door. 

“Yes!” You exclaim breathlessly. “Go away! I’m having a convo with Van!”

“You have to show me everything when you’re done!” Mary yells through the door, retreating when you hurriedly agree. Thankfully your actual texting thread is mild compared to what you’re about to send. 

To reward Van for his vulnerability you send him a video of your hand underneath the lace, your fingers moving against yourself. It felt good, sure, but most importantly it filmed good. Van seems to think so, too, judging by his next video.

You sigh in amusement at his enthusiasm. You forget how easy riling up men can be. 

Maybe you’d cut someone else off at this point, but Van’s eagerness was endearing. You continue to send him videos of you touching yourself, playing up some soft moans into the microphone. After a few exchanges Van sends a video of his grand finale, complete with his own noises in the background. It’s the one bit out of everything you wish you could’ve saved.

Faking an orgasm is strictly against the rules, so you decide to close off snapchat, coming back to your texts with him instead. In an exhilarated rush you let your glasses of wine do the typing as you send Hope that makes London more bearable. 

Christttt Van sends again. Trust me it did 

You emerge from the bathroom in all your flushed, disheveled glory. Mary throws her phone down on the bed when you come into the bedroom.

“What happened?” She shouts in excitement, bouncing on the bed. “What’d you send him?”

You open up your texting thread and pass it over. “We only texted for a sec.”

Mary’s eyes widen. “You snapchatted him?” 

“I mean…” You shrug, blushing. “We snapchatted each other.”

Mary beams in approval. “‘Hope that makes London more bearable’,” She reads out loud before cackling. “Jesus, girl, what has gotten into you?”

“I don’t know!” You exclaim, laughing. “I never do shit like this!”

“I’ve never seen you act like this,” Mary agrees, passing your phone back. “Van is just bringing out a Y/N like never before.”

“Oh, stop. It’s just been forever since I’ve been around someone I really like. That’s all. You know I had that awful dating streak that was so bad I literally gave up.”

“That’s true, I do remember talking you into giving Van a chance,” Mary smirks. “At this rate I’m waiting for a wedding invitation.”

You wrinkle your nose. “No way.”

“You wouldn’t marry him?”

“Van doesn’t seem like the husband type,” You shrug. “And I don’t even know him, so… Definitely saying no to that proposal.”

Mary hums like she doesn’t quite believe you. “I dunno…” She singsongs. “He acts like he loves you. The whole racing out in a thunderstorm thing? And he gives head. He loves you more than Theo loves me, that’s for sure.”

You roll your eyes at her joke. “He’s just very nice,” You brush her off. “I guess he can afford to be extra nice, like the car thing. But he’s never put out any feelers to even be my boyfriend, so I don’t think he’ll be my husband anytime soon.”

“And what about you?”

You turn around so Mary can undo the safety pins on the bra. “What?”

“Like what kind of feelings do you have for him?”

You think for a moment. “I like what we have. He’s fun to be around.”

“You’re not falling in love with him?”

“No!” You giggle.

“Not even a little bit?”

“Oh God, I think everyone’s a little bit in love with him. Did you see everyone at that show?”

“You’re right.” Mary’s done unhooking the bra, and you shimmy out of it. “It even rubbed off on me a little. If things don’t work out can I make my move?”

You two erupt in a fit of giggles at the idea.

\\

The next day slips by, lazy and slow. You and Mary go to bed late, wake up even later, and take your sweet time heading out to grab some breakfast. By the time you’re sitting down to eat it’s already edging towards late afternoon. Theo stumbles in, hungover and exhausted from last night’s adventures. He’s got his own hangover cure in hand, and you three eat together while Mary and you tease him about the strippers. 

Afterwards you all settle in on the couch. Mary and Theo are in the middle of some series, and you watch it for lack of anything better to do even if you don’t understand the plot. They seem quite passionate over whatever’s happening, and that’s more amusing than the actual show. You manage to sneak a few clips of the two of them angrily debating over a character and send them to Van on snapchat. He texts you a laughing face in response. 

Before you know it it’s dinnertime, and you never ended up going back to your own place. You’re grateful to be so close with someone that staying over a second time is an unspoken agreement as you all argue over where to order dinner from. If anything, Mary seems happy that she can keep a close eye on you for a little longer.

The argument somehow ends with everyone working together to make spaghetti. Theo takes over meatball production, you’re in charge of concocting a pot of sauce, and Mary takes on the extraordinary task of both DJing and boiling the prepackaged noodles. There’s no garlic bread, so you all settle for baking regular slices of bread piled with butter, cheese and spices. Despite everyone’s differences in technique and flavor preferences, by some magic it all turns out perfect.

After your late dinner you retire to the guest bedroom, which you’ve stayed in many times over the years. But after a day of being lazy you feel restless, your body feeling rested enough to resist sleep. You pass the time by scrolling mindlessly on social media.

What are you up to? 

Van’s not really one to text first, so when the notification slides onto your screen you jump at something to entertain you. Can’t sleep :( you confess.

In the same boat Van replies. 

You snort to yourself. Aren’t you always lol 

Haha yeah. Another bubble from him: Doesn’t make it easier though

I bet, You type back. I’m sure time differences don’t help. 

Deffo not. 

As you try to think of a response, Van sends another. Where are you?

Laying in bed. Stayed over at Mary’s again.

Typing indicator. Then: Can you manage a sec alone?

I don’t have any more pics Van. I sent you the only two good ones I took. You punctuate the message with a laughing emoji. 

Highly doubt that

That you only took two good ones I mean

But actually I was wondering if I could give you a call

At that you perk up. Yeah you can call!

Van doesn’t respond to your text, but after about five agonizing, uncertain minutes your phone lights up with his call.

“Hello,” You greet him immediately. 

“Hi.” You don’t realize how much you miss Van’s voice until you hear it. “What time is it for you?”

“Midnight,” You tell him after peeking at your screen to double check. “What time is it there?”

“Eight.”

“At night?”

“No, in the morning.”

The weirdness of talking to someone who’s existing in a whole different time of day settles over your skin. “That’s weird.”

Van laughs. “Are you alone?”

“Yep,” You tell him, smoothing the comforter over your legs to keep your hands busy. “Why are you being so paranoid?”

“Paranoid?” Van sounds both amused and offended. “About what?”

“About me being alone! Is you calling me some sort of secret?”

“No!” Van chuckles. “I just want to make sure we’re speaking in private.”

You start to catch his drift, trying to suppress your smile so he doesn’t hear it down the line. “Oh? And why’s that?”

“You can’t sleep, right?” Van’s voice is low.

The sudden shift in the tone of his voice makes your stomach flip. You try to keep your tone breezy. “It’s kind of annoying, yeah.”

“It is,” Van agrees. 

“But it’s morning for you,” You tease him, “Shouldn’t you be heading to work?”

“Not ‘til later. Which is fucking great because I didn’t sleep a wink all night.”

“Oh? That sounds rough.”

“Wasn’t so bad. Wrote a pretty good song.”

“You wrote a song?” You furrow your brows in confusion even if nobody’s there to see. “Your album just came out!”

“I never stop writing,” Van brushes you off. “Anytime an idea hits I play around with it.”

You wonder if he writes down these songs in that leather notebook you’d seen at his house. “I see.”

“Yeah.” Van’s voice suddenly goes back to the lower tone he’d been using before you two had gotten distracted. “Anyway, I thought we’d help each other out.”

“Help each other out? How?” You deliver your question in the same mock-cluelessness of a cheesy porn actress. 

“Oh, Christ,” Van’s quiet laughter bubbles over the line. “Will you fucking quit?”

“Quit what?” You maintain the cluelessness. “I don’t understand what you’re asking me to do, Mr. McCann.”

Van laughs so hard it turns to a coughing fit. “That’s fucking sick. Mr. McCann is my dad.”

“Ew,” You agree quietly. “But what did you have in mind?”

“Thought we could both get off, if you’d like to get focused.”

“Don’t blame this on me,” You argue mildly. “Where do we start?”

“Pants off and getting comfortable, I suppose.”

“Yeah, okay.” You set the phone aside while you wriggle out of your underwear and debate what position you’d like to be in. Laying down worked fine, but the pillows on the bed have the gears in your brain whirring. You internally debate whether using one of the guest room pillows is disgusting. You were pretty sure you were the only one that stayed in here, though. And you could just use one and concoct some sort of reason they’d need to wash it later. You promise yourself the latter and grab one of the ones at the bottom of the stack. 

You hear the noise of Van speaking, but the phone isn’t pressed to your ear.

“Huh?” You ask when you pick it back up. “I set the phone down.”

“Are you ready?” Van asks.

“No, I’m still getting comfortable.” You smush the phone into the crook of your neck while you puff the flattened pillow and straddle it. 

“What? How long does that take?”

“Shush,” You demand. “It’s a science. Anyway, I’m comfortable now.” You sit back on your knees, feeling the cool fabric press between your legs.

“What’s comfortable?”

Your cheeks heat up in embarrassment that you have to explain it. But you suppose you better get over that quick, considering it’s the only way this’ll work. “Um, I’m using a pillow.”

“Like that show we watched?”

You feel your face burning hotter even though he was being genuine. “Yeah. Like that. You’re doing this too, right?”

“Course I’m doing it too,” Van assures you. “Can’t let you have all the fun.”

You chew at a piece of dead skin on your lip. “So what position are you in?”

“On my back on my bed. The usual.”

In your mind you picture his bedroom twenty minutes away, even though that’s not where he is. The fact you have no idea what’s going on on his end is disorienting. “Are you hard?” 

“Uh, just about,” Van’s voice is raspy. “Figure once you get going I’ll be there.”

“You want me to start first?” Your voice wavers the tiniest bit from nerves.

“Yeah. Talk me through it.”

“Okay…” You trail off nervously. You switch your phone into your other hand so that you can reach between your legs with your dominant hand. All of this talking has already had a noticeable effect on your body, which is instantly happy at some light friction. 

“I, uh-” You shiver at your own touch. “Just starting off slow.”

Van makes a small, strained noise. It’s so slight it almost sounds like background noise, but there’s the noise of his exhale against the speaker. Encouraged by his response, you search for something more to say.

“With circles,” You add. “You know, uh, how you start off with bigger circles?” The idea of him being the one to touch you makes you shudder. “Like that. You always get it right.”

“Yeah?” Van breathes.

“Yeah,” You sigh. Your fingers speed up, your hips rocking against the pillow to magnify the sensation. “Did you start yet?”

“I did,” Van confirms. You shut your eyes tight and try to imagine him.

“Do you use something?” You ask, desperate to be able to sharpen the image in your mind’s eye. 

“Hm?”

“Like… lotion? Or lube?” Your fingertips rub over a spot that sends a shock up your spine and you can’t control your gasp. 

Van starts speaking but stutters in surprise at your noise. “No,” He finally grits out. “I- I do the old lick-the-palm-of-my-hand. That’s it though.”

You’ve narrowed down the spot throbbing for attention, a moan slipping down the line to Van. “Fuck,” You sigh, your legs widening. You press against the pillow harder, riding it with the same enthusiasm you ride Van with. “I wish I had my vibrator,” You whine.

His breath hitches. “You’ve got one?”

“At home in my drawer I do.” Thinking about pressing it into you while it buzzes on the perfect setting makes you twitch desperately against your fingertips. “Fuck, I wish I had it so bad.”

“What would you do with it, though?” Van pants. You can clearly hear the soft clicking of Van’s foreskin slipping against any precome, giving you a sense of his rhythm. 

“Slow down,” You plead, trying to focus and match your tight circles to his pace. “I’m trying to go at the same pace as you.”

Van’s breathing is jagged as you hear him slow his pace slightly.

You try to think up some sort of response to Van’s question about the vibrator. The only reason you were craving it so bad is because Van was out of town. It doesn’t see the light of day when he’s in L.A..

“I only use it when you’re not here,” You confess, too exhilarated to censor yourself. “So if you were around I wouldn’t be doing shit with it.”

“Oh fuck,” Van sounds dangerously close to the edge. “I miss you. I wish I was fucking you.”

His voice sounds raw. You replay the way he says he misses you over and over in your mind. 

“I miss you too,” You admit, your voice cracking. “I’ve been thinking about riding you this entire time.” 

“I’m gonna come,” Van pants.

“I know,” You tell him. “I can hear it.”

There’s the frantic noise of his pace speeding up before Van’s moaning down the line. You squeeze your eyes shut so hard it hurts just so you can picture his face, recalling all the details you remember when you’d jerked him off over your stomach. 

You focus on your hazy fantasy of riding Van and getting to see his face tense like that until you’re over the edge, breathing his name into the microphone. 

A blissful silence follows as you both come back down. You allow your bodyweight to slump sideways, dramatically rolling off of the pillow. 

“What was that?” Van croaks.

“Me readjusting,” You say, hesitantly giving the pillow a slight sniff. It smells like sex. You cram it back into the bottom of the pile, reminding yourself to think up a lie in the morning. 

“Oh. Think you can sleep now?”

“Yeah.” You wince at the way your thighs ache from your position. “Definitely wore myself out. What about you?”

“Exhausted. Ready to catch some rest.”

“Okay.” You yawn. “I’ll let you go.”

“I miss you,” Van says again earnestly. “I’ll be back in the States soon.”

It’s one thing to say things spur of the moment during sex, but Van repeating his declaration stuns you. 

“Miss you,” You reply instinctually. “So does my vibrator. It’s in need of a vacation.”

Your joke lands as intended, your heart swelling as Van breaks out into a belly laugh. 

“Christ,” He catches his breath enough to say. “You’re somethin’ else.” You hear the faint click of his lighter. “Stay on the phone and have a smoke with me?”

“I can’t,” You groan in disappointment. “I don’t have any on me.”

“Oh. Alright. I’ll let you get to sleep, then.” He sounds equally as disappointed. 

“Okay. Text me.”

“I will. Goodnight.”

“Night.”

\\

[sol1056]

What are your overall thoughts on Castlevania season 3? So far the season, particularly the last two episodes (especially the 9th episode), have been controversial.

Well, that penultimate episode definitely put me in mind of the famous quote…

Obiwan: “I feel a great disturbance in the force…”

Half of which was probably screams into the void over this seeming betrayal, and the other half was shrieks in delight about confirmed OT3 potential.

On a more serious note, I’ve got a bunch of asks about S3, so I’m covering them all in this one response, because my thoughts come down to one thing.

This season was all about trust.

If we can consider this season (much like S1) to be setup, these episodes are for getting characters into the places and mindsets that the following act will require. So whatever we get in S4, it’ll require that Sypha be accustomed to Trevor’s life as an outcast demon-hunter, that Trevor accept his choices impact more than just him, that Alucard repell intrusions on his solitary guardianship, that Carmilla has a bound forgemaster and solid plans to grow an army, and that Issac has a full-sized army of his own. 

A pedestrian approach would have been all plot: a whole lot of running from one place to the next while shouting exposition. It could’ve ended up a truly jarring tonal shift between what’s basically four separate storylines: Alucard and Cho’s former prisoners, Sypha and Trevor and Saint Germain, Isaac’s journey to find Hector, and finally Carmilla and Hector. Though given they hardly interact after the first episode, we could treat this as two parallel storylines: Carmilla and her sisters, and Hector and Lenore.

(Spoilers behind the cut.)

Instead, Ellis uses these four (or five) storylines to explore different issues with trust, betrayal, and isolation. Sypha and Trevor recognize that St Germain’s unexpected willingness to trust wasn’t born of seeing them as trustworthy, so much as a symptom of St Germain’s overwhelming isolation and loneliness – and they even remark on the similarity to someone else, implied to be Alucard. Who – after his highly guarded and distanced interactions with Sypha and Trevor in S2, followed by a month (or a year, Alucard’s lost track) of total isolation – has come to the same place as St Germain. 

In both cases, those finales pivots on whether this third, isolated person can be trusted, as well as whether that person can trust the pair that claims to be helping. St Germain isn’t a fighter, and goes into the finale clearly terrified as to whether Sypha and Trevor can even keep him safe, while Sypha and Trevor have to take it on faith that St Germain’s intentions are good. (If you take Alucard’s animation to indicate that he has no experience as a lover, then the parallels are even more stark.)

Meanwhile, Isaac – as the captain so insightfully points out – remains fixated on the offenses done him, easily dismissing the kindness of an unexpected gift from a stranger. Hector’s issue, on the other hand, is too much trust, given too easily, with no questions ever asked (as Lenore drives home, first through interrogation and second through manipulation). Isaac’s determination not to trust anyone makes his way more difficult, while Hector’s determination not to question his immediate trust in the latest authority figure is what eventually traps him. 

Even the four vampire sisters (an element I really loved, almost making up for the first two seasons’ near-dearth) pivot around issues of trust, but in their case, it’s whether they can trust that Carmilla’s grand vision is feasible. They don’t distrust Carmilla, or her ideas – they distrust that they can fulfill her visionary plan to its fullest extent. But they’re also intrigued by the idea, and clearly competent enough to make it happen – and despite a few times where it seems there might be fractures (more of Lenore’s diplomatic manipulation, in hindsight), the four really do trust each other pretty firmly.

There’s a secondary theme threaded through the storylines, too, although we only hear it stated explicitly in the Isaac and Trevor/Sypha storylines. 

the captain: “If you don’t have your own story, you become part of someone else’s.”

The context here is whether one’s motivation comes from an external source, or is internal to the person. Isaac’s motivation (at least at the midpoint of this season) is clearly stated as revenge on Hector – that is, to rectify Hector’s wrongs that undid Dracula’s story. Alucard, too, is trapped in someone else’s story, as his motivation first is that he thinks helping two lost souls would please his mother, and later that training new demon hunters would please Trevor. 

Sypha’s motivation is simpler: action! adventure! excitement! And in not stopping to consider the source (or the results) of her motivation, she ends up being accessory to not one but three stories (with Trevor along for the ride). The Trevor/Sypha storyline could be seen, in this light, as one in which they’re tools in other peoples’ stories. They fail to warn/assert/react fast enough to prevent the mad priest’s actions, they learn of (and then tackle) the church problem due to the town mayor’s need, and they learn of (and then tackle) the thing in the basement due to St Germain’s need. 

In the end, St Germain (like Dracula) goes onto the next chapter of his story, with Sypha and Trevor left to handle the aftermath (like Isaac). They don’t even reclaim their story with the final discovery of the mayor’s depravity, as they end up (if understandably) destroying the evidence, as the mayor had requested. 

When Trevor echoes the captain’s words (which could be Ellis wanting to drive the point home, or could imply that at some point, Trevor also met the captain), Sypha deflects his point. She’s quite certain she’s been living her own story, and enjoying it immensely. In the aftermath, Trevor turns the point around, saying that for the past few months, they’ve been living Sypha’s life, all action and adventure. 

Trevor: “And now, we’re living my life.”

Trevor’s origins, after all, lie in the destruction of his family – but that destruction wasn’t at the hands of the demons they fought. Instead, it was at the hands of the church, its people, and the larger community. His storyline in S1-S2 was of someone who’d seen the worst of humanity, and ended up deciding to fight because he chose to, not because humanity deserves it.   

With the possible exception of St Germain (which is more of an open question than a certainty), they trusted and discovered their trust wasn’t misplaced, so much as… that taking everything at face value meant they remained blind to what lay beneath. Their story halts with Trevor reminded of why he originally kept people at a distance (through snark and alcohol), and Sypha now enlightened as to how sometimes humans are far worst monsters. 

That blindness is also present in Alucard’s story, when he takes the two young prisoners-turned-hunters at face value. He opens his house (well, most of it) to them, trains them, and tells them secrets of how to hunt his father’s race. It’s a radical shift from his original reaction to the Belmont hold, as a museum dedicated to the extermination of his race.

Which brings me to Ellis’ choice to have the finales as parallel battles, but he manages to have them reflect each other, as well. For Isaac, Sypha, and Trevor, it’s an external battle against an overwhelming foe. Sypha ends with literal blood on her hands, and other than St Germain’s departure, the rest of their victory is literally pyrric.  

For Hector and Alucard, their storylines peak (ahem) at what should be a moment of trust and connection, which is why I can see the choice to have those storylines turn sexual. (Honestly, I thought the two young hunters were just going to cook Alucard dinner in return, or something – I had zero expectations that any story would ever go there.) 

First, five separate battles would’ve been just a lot of chaos, compared to the contrast of apparent happy-endings (or happy-middles). Second, it drives home that Alucard has defenses all over the place, but none to seduction, while Hector simply clings to whomever is willing to call the shots, and only thinks to question later. They’re in the stage of their story that the captain raises to Isaac: after you’ve achieved this goal, what next? What is left for you? 

Which is why I think their parallel endpoints – Isaac’s final battle, Alucard and the hunters, Hector and Lenore – all come to a head at being bound in some way. They’re still playing out someone else’s story, so they run headfirst into situations where that tunnel-vision can be used against them. Isaac may be the least trusting of the lot, but even he shows a remarkable tendency to take things at face value: to trust the gift from the seller, to listen to the captain, to sit and converse with the old witch who tells him about the possessed city. With as little foreknowledge as Alucard or Hector, Isaac rushes in, eyes too fixed on achieving someone else’s goal to see the trap ahead. 

None of the bindings are shown as simple, easy to break, or without lasting effect. At the same time, it’s striking that Isaac and Alucard do manage to force their way free, while Hector can only flail about in pain. To me – given the theme of trust – that implies that somehow, both Alucard and Isaac do have the potential for a balanced trust. That is (unlike Hector) knowing when to take it away, even if both struggle with learning to give it.

Oddly, that’s why I think the season managed to position things beautifully for a next season, because we’ve come full circle. 

It’s a curious thing about Alucard: when we first meet him in S1, he’s recovering from his father’s betrayal (of attacking humans); in S3, he’s recovering from the grief of loss (his parents, his only two friends) – and S4 ends with him shivering in pain/hurt over the betrayal of two people. Gotta wonder how much more Ellis will see fit to break this character down.

In S2, Hector was a valued lieutenant, if terribly blind to the implications of what Dracula wanted. Now those illusions are gone; he’s enslaved, wanted only for his skills (in the forge and in bed) – and the deal is quite explicit. Lenore has the grace to say that Hector should be getting something out of the deal, but that doesn’t change that Hector can’t pretend there’s no deal being made. 

Isaac begins cast out, grieving Dracula (not entirely as a mission, but more as a friend, I think) – and ends with the resources and experiences to go in a new direction. He doesn’t have to take out Hector, who could be seen as small fry, anyway. (Especially given Hector’s now just a shell of a controlled man.) If Isaac chooses to go after Carmilla in S4, that’ll be the first step towards making his story his own. Note also that although Isaac may seem alone, he’s accompanied by a host of creatures. He has allies.

It’s the trust in those allies that seems to determine who ends well, and who does not. Although Trevor and Sypha (especially Sypha) were dealt an emotional blow by the post-battle revelations, they always had each others’ backs – and they leave the town behind, relatively unscathed. Isaac ends victorious, with a few of his army intact and the material to make more. 

But the storyline that ends in the ascendant position is Carmilla’s. With her visionary ideas and her sisters’ abilities to make those visions real, Carmilla is positioned to go exactly where she wants. Which is why it’s also striking that (other than Lenore’s sex scene), neither Carmilla nor her sisters really have a ‘final’ battle. They’re effectively a season ahead of everyone else – the trust between the four is already established, solid, and reciprocated equally. 

So you could say that being foolhardy about trust will land you in hot water – which pretty much covers all the central protagonists. But the story’s not that bleak, despite its final scenes, because it’s also saying that sometimes, to get where you want to be, you do have to take that leap – as illustrated by Isaac and St Germain. Or even that you trust, and if betrayed, you deal with the consequences, learn the lesson, and move on, like Trevor and Sypha. 

Or you learn a different lesson, one preached by dear old dad: put the bodies of your conquests out front on stakes, and lock the doors, and trust no one. Which is a legitimate reaction to betrayal, don’t get me wrong, but one that S3 seems to be firmly saying will only end badly.  

[fangirlauthor]

vld season 8 [SPOILERS]

Okay, so these are my thoughts on voltron season eight and a little bit on voltron in general. I’m not here to hate on canon, or the voice actors, or the writers, or hate on anyone, really; they’re just my opinions. If you haven’t seen season 8 or don’t want spoilers or don’t want to read my opinions, stop here. 

I’m going to split my thoughts into sections, so here goes. Sorry this isn’t lok themed, I promise I’m still writing things for lok, but I guess I’ll be writing things for other fandoms now as well; my brain can be kind of erratic, so what I’m writing depends on what I’ve been doing recently. 

Also, if you have different opinions or thoughts or anything you want to ask about my opinions on Voltron, feel free to send me an ask. 

Characters

Hunk - Honestly, I thought he was pretty cool. I liked his ending mostly, and how he got to continue to do the things he loves while spreading peace and promoting cooperation between people and using his cooking to accent that. I also don’t have any particular headcanons or anything for him as of right now, but maybe in the future. 

Pidge/Katie Holt - I didn’t have any problems with Pidge’s ending either, I actually kinda liked it, and headcanons... she definitely pursues a career in a STEM field, and I think she goes on to do super cool science things I wouldn’t understand. 

Shiro - I didn’t hate his ending as well, I do wish they hadn’t killed Adam though, so maybe I’ll pretend he’s alive somewhere. I dunno. I’m really glad they made him happy, and let him finally find peace. I kinda have a headcanon that he’ll run a space orphanage or something that works with the Blade of Marmora humanitarian relief thing or whatever they are now. I hope he gets to take all the naps he needs.

Keith - I also liked his ending a fair amount, I think it’s cool that he’ll get to help people and I think that it’s in alignment with his character arc from what I can tell. He went from suffering to helping make sure no one else does, and that can a difficult jump to make, from what I understand. 

Lance - Okay, so this is a hot topic. Honestly, I don’t agree with him being a farmer forever; I think at some point he’s going to start to heal and grow again and that he’ll start travelling the galaxy. Maybe he’ll continue to teach about Allura, but in different places and in different ways, all across the galaxy, like I said. Maybe, at some point, he’ll discover that happiness doesn’t have to be something to remember, but that it can be something to discover once again, even if it’s different then before. At some point, he’s going to continue to grow and spread light and love and maybe even find his own. 

He could have definitely had more character development in the show, instead of them spending the last season focusing on changes due to romance rather than other forces (or even the effects those romantic feelings had on him after could have been handled better). That’s why, in case this wasn’t clear the first time I said it, I think that he’s going to go around the galaxy, maybe even with Keith and the Blades, to teach not only about Allura but about other heroes, about missions he’s been on and the things he’s learned from war. I don’t think he’s going to be a farmer forever, but I think that some time to rest before he gathers the courage to start growing as a person again will help him/is necessary. 

Allura - Okay, I’m going to say right off the bat that I don’t think she should have died. I do like that she was designed as a strong, brave character who makes her own decisions. Yeah, I really don’t like that she died and I don’t think she should have, but she did, so yeah. I think that she was smart enough to find another solution and that her death was unnecessary, like I’ve said, but I respect that her sacrifice was on par with her character/character traits/personal values. I’ve got some other things to say in a minute, but we’ll get to that. 

As a group, after the show ended - I definitely think they saw each other more than once a year, and that they all still treated each other like the family they claimed to be during battles. Bonds made in war are hard to break, and theirs is most certainly unbreakable. They’ll be a team for their lifetime, even if their jobs take them to different places for a time. 

Ships

Okay, so this is also a hot topic from what I can tell. I’ve gotta say I don’t a) ship Pidge with anyone and b) I’m not here to hate on any ships unless they’re legitimately abusive or wrong in the manner of, y’know, pedophilia and such. 

Allurance - I don’t hate this ship, and I don’t hate it being canon. I don’t actively ship it and I don’t think that, even if Allura had lived, they would have been endgame anyway. I do disagree with people who say that they don’t have any chemistry at all, because I think they have at least some. I definitely don’t ship it as an endgame ship, but I think they were/could’ve been great friends. I do feel like it was a little forced in the beginning, and I feel like it sends a slightly negative message about men being overly persistent after a woman says no and negates Allura’s individual strength a little bit. I do think that if it had been done slightly different, it would have seemed less like Allura was guilt-tripped or practically coerced into the relationship and could have shown that people don’t need a significant other to make them whole because people are their own, whole person; it could have shown that bonds between people make two whole people stronger, in a sense, with both people respecting that the other person is their own person and makes their own choices/has their own opinions. (As long as those opinions aren’t harmful to the other person or to other people.)

Klance - Okay, so if you couldn’t tell, I ship klance. I personally think they have a lot of chemistry, especially in some scenes, and I think that (in accordance with my Lance headcanon) that they’ll eventually start working together in humanitarian relief efforts/teaching trips and either end up together or even just be friends. I think they have a great relationship either way, and that they support each other really well; Lance being Keith’s impulse control guy and Keith being Lance’s confidence. Like I said, they definitely have great chemistry but as long as they end up working together some way and benefit each other, I’m good if they stay friends. 

Shay and Hunk - Is there a ship name for this? I haven’t seen one, but I might’ve missed it. Anyway, I think their relationship is pretty sweet and I don’t ship it aggressively but I really do think they’re cute. 

Shiro and Curtis - I think they’re cute as well, I’m glad Shiro’s happy and hopefully he gets lots of time to rest while still helping others.  I do miss Adam and I’m sad he’s dead; I’m also cool with a ship with Shiro in a relationship with both of them or all three of them in a relationship with each other. I’m sad we didn’t get to see Curtis and Shiro interact with each other before the wedding, but again I’m trying not to be salty even though I don’t like that we never got to see a dynamic between the two. 

The Ending

Okay, I’m a little confused on what happened at the end. I’m pretty sure that the lions are circling the planet, minus the blue lion which is not, but I can’t tell. It is a little bittersweet to me that they don’t still pilot the lions, but I understand that things have to come to an end for other things to take place. Still bittersweet though. 

Overall

Overall, I’ve gotta say I didn’t hate it. There were a few things I would have preferred to be canon (like klance or better character development for some characters) or preferred not to be canon (Allura dying) but I came in with low expectations so it kept me fairly entertained. Like I said, not here to hate on anything just my opinions. 

So that’s all I can think of right now, I might talk about my thoughts on Lotor later, maybe on lotor x allura as well, but I’m running out of time so that’s all for today. Also, sorry for the long post.

[harrysdimples]

folklore track by track review

the 1: love me a piano intro. oh this guitar?? swearing in the first 5 seconds? I like these lyrics. never bleed????????? hmm.................it would’ve been you.............I..............it would’ve been fun if you were the one.........bruv..........dare I say it...............am I just clowning.....or like.......................is she....ya know.......talking about........you know.......h****?? oh these vocals ! bruv I don’t care this is about harry because I say so afhdjssa. I really love this production and her vocals, it already sounds so much more mature than lover and it’s only the opener, feels like a more-mature version of a deep cut on red. excellent start!

cardigan: oh this percussion?? the piano?? her voice sounds fab. is this about the met? black lipstick? or bleachella? her VOCALS bruv sound 10x better than anything on lover?? I love these lyrics omg. THIS IS SO GOOD. HEARTBEAT ON THE HIGH LINE ONCE IN TWENTY LIFETIMES. this so good?? try to change the ending peter losing wendy?? leaving like a father running like water????? I love this so much omg. the atmospheric vocal...the percussion....the lyrics.....the piano......LAV IT. I can’t get over how already this is more lyrically dense than lover and reputation but I ain’t complaining!! I’m both surprised and not surprised that they went with this for the single from this era but I really like it, it feels like it would fit right at home in the NFR tracklist.

the last great american dynasty: love these strings?? omg the beat? is this political? hmm I like the lyrics of the verses but i’m not 100% feeling the lyrics/structure of the chorus, feels a little like she’s trying to fit too many words into the line, but I love the storytelling aspect of it and it’ll probably grow on me. it’s like a grown-up version of starlight or the lucky one. Is this supposed to be like an alternate version of what taylor’s life could’ve been like? or am I just completely misinterpreting that lmao?

exile ft. bon iver: like this piano intro. love bon iver. oh the birds in the background?? ooft these lyrics....brutal. is this about calvin? is that a kazoo? afjdshjsa I promise i’m not trying to be like this but like......this is very......hm. I really love his voice. the bridge is really pretty with both their voices. I can see myself staring dramatically outside the window listening to this when we’re allowed to properly go back outside lmao. very nice and pretty, it’ll probably hit harder later on than my first listen but I like it. 

my tears ricochet: this a-cappella intro? oh this is sad :( what a ghostly scene....................................I didn’t have it in myself to go with grace :( oh this buildup?? I still talk to you........omg these atmospheric vocals I. LOVE. I need to read the lyrics on my next few listens to this but I really like it so far.

mirrorball: this feels like the outro in a coming of age 80s movie. love the soft guitars. oh these vocals! I know she didn’t mean to but when she signs tallest it sounds like she’s saying toilet to me lmao. jack’s atmospheric vocals!!! yes!!! the bridge is really beautiful. all I do is try, try, try. I’m just trying to get you to look at me :( I do have to say, while I love how lyrically dense this album is and reflective it is in comparison to her last few albums, the instrumentation doesn’t change a whole lot throughout these songs on first listen, it’s more that atmospheric vocals/sounds are built on top of it, which is fine, but I think they’ll benefit a lot from me listening to them outside the context of the album. love the meaning behind this though and I think it’s really beautiful.

seven: (this is when I stopped doing live reactions and instead went for post track reactions) Is it weird to say that this did better at the “love letter to love” concept meant for lover than lover did? this song feels more like for her legacy/future family and how she’s grown than as an active, present moment which is nice. I will say while I did love NFR when it came out, it also hit a wall with me eventually where it needed some breathing space or something to break up the sections of the album (which harry does actually quite well) and I feel like we’re hitting that point (if we haven’t already). I’m always slightly apprehensive about long albums like this which is why I said this will benefit from listening outside the context of the album. 

august: I’m really curious as to who this is about lmao. but this was excellent in the progression of the track and the buildup/atmosphere and dynamics of the track, this was what I was wanting a bit more with songs like exile and it did great at building a different sonic landscape which is what was needed in the album imo. one of my favourite tracks so far.

this is me trying: this is very...wistful and reflective. a hybrid of the archer and I wish you would to me. “I was so ahead of the curve, the curve became a sphere, Fell behind all my classmates and I ended up here” is a LYRIC bruv. feels reminiscent of what she said in the miss americana documentary about how you’re stunted in your growth when you become famous at a young age and you fall behind the emotional development of most people around you, which is really interesting. “Pouring out my heart to a stranger, But I didn't pour the whiskey” is that supposed to be like a metaphor for stopping herself from saying too much all the time because she knows it could get out/be perceived in a certain way? either way, these are some great lyrics. “you're a flashback in a film reel on the one screen in my town” hmmm.....

illicit affairs: I LOVE THIS. EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS. I have nothing else to add. this is fantastic. favourite track so far. amazing. 10/10.

invisible string: this song is really sweet lol I wish I was in love with someone to relate more to this. very referential to her work as a whole and I liked the more stripped down production.

man this is a long album lol

mad woman: FUCK YOU FOREVER. scream. this is very lana-fied lmao. I wish she did a little more with the electric guitar in the back though, imagine this more being soft-rock? so this is definitely about scott and scooter right? I do like this but it does feel very sonically similar to some of the tracks we’ve heard so far and I wish she had switched it up a little to fit the excellent lyricism of this song, more guitar would’ve really elevated the song imo. 

epiphany: lol I got a bit emotional listening to this, I can already tell i’m going to listen to this at night and cry lmao. I have a massive fear of death/the unknown and this song sort of touched on that concept to me and I really liked the production. this feels like it should be in a movie soundtrack or in like, grey’s anatomy. the heartbeat-like sound in the outro? beautiful. this is the sort of concepts I’ve been wanting from taylor for a while now and the execution of this was really good imo. 

betty: ms swift it’s okay to be gay. the elaborate-ness of putting yourself in the position of a man just to say you liked a girl. how are the kaylors/gaylors holding out lmao this is a nice story (like an upgraded version of ybwm) but I can’t get over how effectively no-homo this is lmao. the key change? love story wishes. oh the wistfullness to be young......and in looooOOOOoooOOove.

peace: love the guitar in the intro. this gives me another more grown up perspective of a song on melodrama? I love her vocals in this. I feel like i’ve said this about 40 times already but the atmospheric sounds....chef’s kiss. 

hoax: the closer. the LYRICISM bitch. “your faithless love's the only hoax I believe in” shut up :( the bridge is gorgeous. I’m not sure how I feel about it as the closer though, it ties up the themes of the album pretty well but I almost feel peace would’ve been a better closer? still really gorgeous though.

okay. overall thoughts. top 3 albums of taylor’s discography for me along with 1989 and red. It did feel long towards the end though and I still think her problem is editing and streamlining her projects which is why I think 1989 (as her best album for that) and red (while being longer than this has enough songs to break up the album so it’s not monotonous for the listener) rank above this for me at the moment, but that could change. If I were her, I would’ve taken out invisible string and possibly betty and seven to have as deluxe tracks. her lyricism is better on this album than both reputation and lover combined, she really did that in like 4 months. I will need more time with it as I always do with taylor’s projects but it was the album she needed in my opinion. I think part of the reason I disliked lover and to a lesser extent, reputation, was because they didn’t come across as if she needed to write them like her other projects, but more projects she felt she should to write because that was where the narrative of her public image was forcing her to go, this feels like a return to form, even if I would tweak a few things. the visuals for this album have all been great (her best album cover after 1989 imo) and I think it benefitted a lot from going into it with next to no expectations, without a single or anything and I hope she continues to just do whatever, rather than painstakingly plan marketing surrounding an album and just allow her talent to speak for itself. really good. favourite tracks are probably: illicit affairs, the 1, cardigan, epiphany and mirrorball. least favourite are probably: invisible string, seven and maybe betty too. i’d rate it about 8/10 at the moment. also: ****** never dies.