#why do they need to look at all the options

[grandline-fics]

Hi Kerrie, thank you for your wonderful writings! I was wondering if we could we see the ‘waking up the morning after’ prompt with Shanks and/or zoro and sabo (if you enjoy writing for these characters). Thanks, I hope you’re having a great day! ✨

DESCRIPTION: Prompt: Waking up the morning after

WARNINGS: a little suggestive but nothing explicit? mostly fluff

CHARACTERS: Shanks, Zoro

WORDS: 1,889

A/N: Thank you for requesting this! I kept everything more on the fluffy and sweet side and only managed to think of something for Shanks and Zoro. I might do something with this for Sabo separately if I think of a scenario for him. Hope you like what I managed to come up for this one.

*REQUESTS ARE OPEN*

DIRECTORY | PROMPT LIST

———————

SHANKS

You’d always known what you were getting yourself in for when you joined the Red Hair Pirates. You knew the type of man Shanks was, his presence alone commanded everyone’s attention and that was before he’d even opened his mouth to begin the effortless charm that flowed from him. He was as charming as he was powerful and unapologetically flirty with everyone he came across. Even before he’d offered you a place on his crew your first interaction with him head been a flirtatious one. It had been so natural and easy, you’d never had an interaction like it. If it hadn’t been interrupted by the group of bandits attacking in the middle of your conversation you’d been sure that you would have gladly followed Shanks to where his bed had been for the night and never seen him again when you woke. However it was thanks to the bandits that Shanks had gotten to see just how formidable a fighter you were and insisted you be a part of his crew. 

Naturally you couldn’t say no to him with an offer like that but now that he was your Captain you’d made it a firm rule that nothing would happen physically between you both. It would just become messy if it was only a one time thing. It would muddy the waters between seeing him as a lover without lessening his authority as your leader. While you knew deep down that Shanks would never kick you off the crew you didn’t want to risk it. You’d kept firm in your dedication to just being his subordinate and resisted his charms when the crew partied. Yes you indulged in the playful banter but that’s as far as you allowed it to go. You just always felt so comfortable with him that the second his lips met yours the evening before during one of your late night talks that all sense went out the window and you gave in to temptation so easily.

That’s why you refused to open your eyes, because if you did that meant facing the fact you’d royally fucked up. Still denial was the more appealing option because the warmth of Shanks’ sleeping body against yours was just as enticing as he was when he was awake. No, you had to be strong. With a deep breath you forced your hand to rub your eyes and slowly opened them, internally cursing when you saw the sight of Shanks sleeping all too peacefully beside you. It really wasn’t fair how good he looked but you couldn’t get distracted. You needed to talk about what happened. Glancing down you looked at his arm across your body, fingers lightly curled against your hip. As if sensing what you were awake, Shanks’ peaceful expression shifted to one of groggy stirring. His fingers secured themselves against your side before his arm pulled you sharply to hold you by his chest. Your breath lodged in your chest when he let out a content sigh, nuzzling his face against your neck. “Mornin’ gorgeous…” Heavy with sleep, his voice was even deeper than normal. When you didn’t immediately answer, Shanks’ eyes finally opened, regarding you carefully. “What’s up?”

“You really have to ask?” You asked softly with a small laugh, turning you head to look at him. You never had an issue being open and honest with Shanks. Even now as you both lay naked and about to talk about what happened between you both you felt no hesitation or need to hold back. “Last night shouldn’t have happened, should it?”

“You asking me or telling me?” Shanks asked softly, fingers lightly moving to play with yours. “I don’t regret it.”

“This isn’t about regrets Shanks.” You sighed, settling your free hand over his to still the gentle but distracting motions. “This is about what happens next. This is about balance. What are the crew going to think?”

“I think the words ‘fucking finally’ and ‘Cap’n you lucky bastard’ will be the general consensus.” Shanks grinned at you, relieved to see you fight a smile and playfully roll your eyes at him. “I’m serious though. The only one overthinking this is you. The crew have been waiting on this for so long so nothing’s going to change with them. The only question is, did you want this to have been a one-time thing?”

“Shanks you don’t do relationships. Not in the time I’ve been on the crew.”

“Yeah because I only wanted to do a relationship with you.” Shanks explained, lacing his fingers between yours to lead your hand up to his lips and press the softest kiss against your knuckles. “So what do you think?”

“I think you’re a very dangerous man Red Hair…” you sighed, stunned at his confession but not rejecting it. His effortless charm and commanding warmth was dangerous. Even more so was how safe and happy he made you but you had no fears about this.

“You’re one to talk.” Shanks chuckled, lowering his hand to pull you closer. “You’ve had me under your spell since the first day we met and I’ll be damned if I let you go now.”  

ZORO

You and Zoro always had a strange sort of tension underlying in your friendship. On the surface you both were warm and comfortable in each other’s presences. Perfectly balancing the other and both having a strong understanding of the other without needing to communicate beyond brief words and the slightest shifts in stance. On the ship you two were considered the closest of friends. Underneath it all? You both held heavy attraction and intense want for each other but at the same time the restraint you both had to never step over that line and delve deeper into what you both desired was stronger. For now you were both set on getting stronger and enjoying your adventures together with the rest of the Strawhats. Deep down you both knew that the other wouldn’t reject any advances if they were made but still you both held back, believing there would be plenty of time for that. That you’d both know when the time was right. 

Then Sabaody turned the tide for you all. Under the assault of the Marines you were all defeat so easily and with terror in your eyes you realised you were all outmatched. Out of instinct you looked to Zoro and you could only watch helplessly and washed in cold dread as the swordsman disappeared in the blink of an eye. Then one by one the rest of you were dispatched by Kuma, struck out of sight and before you knew it you were on a completely different island. Alone and scared for the first time in a long while, missing and fearing for your crew. Just when you thought things couldn’t get worse you were faced with the news that your Captain had lost his brother. Thankfully you deciphered his coded message and resolved yourself to spend that time getting stronger. 

Through the two years away from your friends you always thought of them, hoping they were safe and training too although Zoro crept into your mind most of all. On your worst days, the image of him training on Sunny’s deck like he used to helped motivate you to push through your mental blocks and keep going. Finally the day came when you stepped foot on Sabaody again and a shudder ran through you at the memory of what had happened the last time came to your mind. You had faith in your crew that you’d all improved and it would never happen again but it was hard not to remember the fear of that day as if it was happening all over again. Setting off you made your way to the grove for the long awaited reunion. 

Night had begun to fall when you spotted the familiar sight of Sunny’s head and your steps quickened from your relaxed pace into a full run. Just as you climbed onto the deck you felt a presence rush towards you. Sharply you turned and lifted your weapon in time to block the blade being swung at you. Your eyes lit at the sight of Zoro, the relief that flooded you quickly gave way into all those old feelings hurtling back and your smile grew to see the recognition appear in Zoro’s expression. Then your smile fell slightly to see one of his eyes was scarred and shut. Without thinking you reached out and settled your hand on his cheek, your thumb gently touching his scar. The small action was all it took to bring those old feelings that had always danced dangerously close to the surface reappear stronger than even given the two years of separation. “Who else has arrived?”

“No one. It’s just us.” Zoro answered while capturing your hand that was still against his cheek. Without needing to say anymore you both closed the distance remaining between you both and your free hand fisted in the collar of his clothing and yanked him forward while his grabbed your waist. Neither of your wasted anymore time in finally coming together and kissing intensely, something both of you had spend the two years apart regretting hadn’t happened until now. Even then it wasn’t enough, you were both so desperate for each other, to make up for lost and wasted time holding back that you both fell headlong into your desires now; acting in perfect synchronisation and the almost wordless communication that was unique to the two of you.

Finally when morning came you woke feeling calmer and more at peace than you ever had before. Even with the weight of Zoro’s arms holding you tight and secured against his body you felt light and happy. More importantly you didn’t feel scared about the next part of your adventures with the crew. Your eyes opened to see Zoro was already awake and watching you carefully, seeming to be just as relaxed as you were. “Hope you’re not planning to greet everyone back like this.”

“As if.” Zoro rolled his good eye but the slow grin began to appear on his face as he took in your face in the morning light. The two years had changed you both, but not in the ways it mattered. You were still you and apart from his loyalty to Luffy, you were the only other person he worked hard to get stronger for and return to. At his response you grinned brightly and Zoro let his knuckles lightly stroke your face, he’d missed your smile. He’d missed you. Zoro leaned forward with the intention of pulling you into another kiss only to stop when a familiarly ‘super’ cheer broke through the calm morning air. 

“Looks like we won’t have the ship to ourselves anymore.” You grinned, leaning in to press a quick kiss against his lips as you prepared yourself to get up and change to greet Franky. It wouldn’t be long now before you were all finally reunited. You were stopped when Zoro sat up with you and pulled you back to hug you tight, his silent way of telling you he wasn’t going anywhere ever again, not without you. With a warm smile you squeezed his arm in a reassurance that you felt the same way.

——————————————-

TAG LIST (If I’ve missed anyone or if you want to be added just let me know) @3v37773, @tsaaps , @i-am-all-love-puns-and-lazy , @sanemisnonexistenteyebrow , @fiery-captain-spider-santa @kabloswrld , @atanukileaf , @ane5e , @stuckinthewrongworld , @deathsmajestysworld , @cloudysunset04 , @extremely-ashtridic , @decayingpizza , @liesatemyocean , @ace-for-ace , @nerium-lil , @destynelseclipsa

[rvp32]

Heir to the clan's legacy- Chapter 3

White cum spills out of Yoona's stuffed pussy and your cock is covered in her juices and your seed.

You turn around and smirk.

"Mommy…why don't you clean my cock?"

"Y/N Do you know what the fuck you have just done!" Taeyeon screams as she walks toward you.

The loud scream makes you lose your concentration a little allowing Yoona to escape from your binding

"What have I done, mommy? I fucked Auntie Yoona because she's sexy. I'm an adult. Why are you so mad?"

"I told you specifically not to do any such thing before you left and not only did you go ahead and fuck your aunty and cum inside of her you also had the audacity to call me here," Taeyeon screams

You then turn to Yoona.

"She enjoyed it. Didn't you, mommy" You say smirking, calling Yoona mommy.

Yoona was still recovering from the orgasm and she was also scared but she shyly said, " It was some of the best sex that I have had in a very long time,"

You smirk smiling, but then Taeyeon flash-stepped and you barely reacted since you weren't on guard. You manage to bat her arm away.

"I'm not a kid anymore, mommy…if I want to fuck YoonA. I will."

"Enough, put on your clothes you are coming home with me right now and we will talk about your behavior," Taeyeon says

she then looks to Yoona, " We are going to have a really long conversation about this Yoona,"

But you shake your head.

"No. I'm not going with you. I didn't do anything wrong." You flash step and put your clothes back on but then you also grab your sword and assume a challenging position.

"Y/n don't do this, all I am suggesting is that we talk. I am not trying to hurt you or even fight you. So calm down, " Taeyeon says trying to calm you down

"Talk about what? You can't baby me anymore. I want to be with Yoona…I will be with Yoona. I'll be with whoever I want. You know I asked Kazuha to be my girlfriend today?"

Yoona was also shocked by this information because she didn't expect you to have already a girlfriend whom you just started dating today. She felt bad because she was your side piece and the second option.

"I am not babying you anymore! I won't do it. We left off at a very bad place in the morning so I just want to clear it up. For fucks sake just listen to me just this one fucking time," Taeyeon said her showing more and more frustration as the conversation goes on

You turn to Yoona.

"Just so you know, you aren't a side piece or a second option…I need to restart my clan…I want you, need you as a partner, Yoona…I love you just as I love Kazuha."

Yoona's expression turned softer after hearing that, she also realized the huge responsibility you had.

You then turn to Taeyeon.

"Don't you understand that? I love you…I want you…who better to restart my clan than you, Mommy?"

"I am open to that and I would be really happy to help you with it as well but Y/n you need to learn to take consent before you jump onto people like that, I was confused and didn't know what you really wanted," Taeyeon explained

You then flash step to her and kiss her deeply again.

"I want you…I want both of you…" Your spiritual pressure rising again.

"Calm down, you don't need to release so much spiritual pressure, I am right here," Taeyeon says as she brushes a little bit of your hair

"I need both of you…" I say with lust, as I derobe once again. "Both of my mommies…sucking my cock…I'm still so full mommy, you said you'd always take care of me.." You pout like a child, playing on Taeyeon's motherly affection for you.

"I will baby boy, I will always take care of my pretty little boy," Taeyeon says before grabbing your cock and slowly rubbing it

"Oh.." I moan, finally. My mommy..my hot mommy.

"Yoona mommy…Taeyeon mommy…please both suck my cock…worship it…"

Yoona crawls to you, with your cum still dripping out of her freshly used pussy. she massages your balls as Taeyeon plays with your cock

"Oh fuck yeah…yes…use your lips my mommies…fuck.."

"aww is that so if you want mommy to use her lips you are going to have to beg pretty boy," Taeyeon whispers in your ear and bites it

You counter and kiss at her neck. You were kissing your mommy…your beautiful Taeyeon and you nibble at her ear too.

"Please Mommy…suck my cock…I've wanted to feel it for so long…your beautiful lips and tongue.."

"Now, that's a good boy, " Taeyeon coos before getting on her knees and taking the tip of her cock into your mouth.

Yoona takes this opportunity to stand up and kiss you passionately

"Mommy it feels so good…you were meant to do this right? My cock…to take care of me…this is the only cock you ever need…"

Taeyeon speeds up, taking in more of your cock every time she went down, trying her best to fit your entire cock into her tiny cute mouth

"Holy fuck mommy…oh my god…that feels so good…yes all of it.."

You kiss Yoona too, but you begin to thrust into Taeyeon's mouth.

Yoona pulls away from the kiss, "Go on fuck that throat like you mean it, show her who she belongs to," Yoona moans into your ear and goes on to kiss your neck and leave marks all over it

This turned you on a lot. As you begin to ram your cock into Taeyeon's thrust over and over.

"My mommy whore…my mommy bitch…my slutty mommy…" You chant as you finally get what you want. Taeyeon began choking on your cock a little but she still continued to take it into her throat as much as she could.

"Go on paint your mommy's throat white with all the precious cum, " Yoona moans as she uses your fingers to stimulate her clit

You bite at Yoona's breasts and suck on her tit..trying to draw out milk. You don't stop fucking Taeyeon's mouth as you shove as much as you could in there, watching it bulge.

"Holy fuck baby that's so hot, are you trying to get milk out of me baby," Yoona moans as she pets your hair like a child who is getting breastfed

"Fuck if only there was milk coming out right now!" You moaned in between sucking Yoona's tits

You had to figure out some spell for that or something…

"Oh, mommy…I'm going to cum…down your fucking throat…"

"GO on baby cum all down your mommy's throat," Yoona cooed you dumped all your cum down Taeyeon's throat

You pant and huff, pulling out and smiling.

"How does it taste Mommy? Your first taste of my cum? Your baby boy's cum?"

"It tastes amazing baby just as I expected it to but holy fuck don't you cum a lot. this is your second load and it is so much I wonder how thick the first load must have been," Taeyeon states,

"Oh the first load was massive and thick alright, his cum is still leaking out of my pussy and I am 100% sure that I am already pregnant with his baby," Yoona says

You pull Yoona in for another torrid kiss with your tongue.

"Your feet next…both of you…I need to taste them and fuck them…" You say with desire.

"aren't you an insatiable horny bastard, if that's what you want then your mommy's shall oblige," Taeyeon says

You growl.

"Oh? Calling your baby boy a bastard? How naughty of you, mommy!" You grab both of them and toss them on the bed. You lie down and have Taeyeon and Yoona sit near you by your cock. Taeyeon folds out her legs towards your face and you begin to lick at her toes and the underside of her feet.

Yoona meanwhile gives you a footjob.

"my baby boy is so naughty and always horny for his mommies isn't he?" Taeyeon questions as she enjoys you worshipping her feet

"I love your white nail polish Mommy…and Yoona's black…so sexy…your feet are so fucking good.."

Taeyeon's feet were so soft and you try to suck on all five toes from her foot at once.

"Aren't you a greedy boy wanting so much all at once, If I had known that you were a feet-loving boy then I would have gotten a pedicure before coming here," Taeyeon says before moaning

You suck on her toes harder.

"No, your toes are so good…so hot…I love them…please give me a double footjob mommies!"

"you are so impatient," Taeyeon says before using one of her feet to push your cock into Yoona's other foot. Both of you matching the rhythm together to jerk off your big hard throbbing cock

"HOLY FUCK MOMMIES.." You howl loudly as they worked together perfectly to stroke your cock off with their feet. The contrast of pedicure colors was amazing

"oh you are really enjoying this so much aren't you, my little perverted loser," Taeyeon teases you as she continues to play with your hard cock

"He loves it so much Unnie, he blew such a huge load when I gave him a footjob before," Yoona says

You pout. "Mommy…that wasn't nice…I'm just so attracted to you…"

"You don't have to lie baby I can feel your cock throb whenever I say things like that," Taeyeon says

"It turns me on when you want me, mommy…you're all mine right?"

"Yes baby I am all yours, both of us belong to you

I then flare up my pressure and jam my cock back into Taeyeon's tight cunt, growling as I use flash step and slam her into the wall and begin drilling into her gasp "Fuck!" Taeyeon moans out as you drill into her the sudden invasion of your cock stretching out her pussy a lot more than expected

"What was that mommy?" I growl as I hammer into her and then kiss her neck, biting at it a bit.

"It feels so fucking good baby, keep pounding Mommy like that use my hole however you want!" Taeyeon growls

"Remember you're my mommy…and my caretaker…I am your Master and baby boy…and you…I fucking own you…to fuck…and use as a whore!"

"Yes, you own me, fucking use me as your whore! make you your cum dump!" Taeyeon moans out pleasure completely taking over her brain

I kiss her with my tongue and speed up. The tightness of her cunt was immaculate..my whore mommy getting fucked by my cock was something else.

"Mommy…I want to drink your fucking milk…"

"Go on baby you can have how much ever you want!" Taeyeon allows you

"Unnie, What is he talking about?" Yoona asks confused about what milk you are asking Taeyeon for

I then lower my mouth to her right breast and swirl my tongue before latching on and sucking. I was finally drinking her milk…my mommy's milk…it was perfection.

"NGHH" Taeyeon moans, the pleasure getting too much for her. It felt like absolute heaven, she hadn't had something feel this good in such a long time

A little milk leaks out from the corner of your mouth and this surprises Yoona. So many questions popping into her head and you see her eyes lined with confusion. To distract her you push your fingers into Yoona's wet pussy and finger her as you continue to pound Taeyeon

"Mommy's milk…mommy's cunt…you're both mine…" you growl.

You were fucking Taeyeon so hard…your mommy…your whore…your bitch…was now truly yours.

Taeyeon's moans now sounded like screams absolutely tearing through thr roam and they were accompanied by Yoona who was also on the cusp of another orgasm

"I'm going to fucking cum mommy! Going to fucking cum so hard!" You roar.

"Go on baby cum inside your mommy, breed her just like you did me," Yoona encourages you and Taeyeon is just simply beyond the ability to speak right now

You were finally going to do it, you were going to breed your mommy Taeyeon…

"FUCK!" You slam your cock all the way inside her cunt and explode…cumming the hardest and longest you ever have…you weren't pulling out and waited minutes until you fully emptied, painting her walls white.

Taeyeon's mind was going absolutely haywire, completely taken over by pleasure. The cum was so warm and felt perfect inside of her. satisfying everything that she had ever wanted.

You then kiss Taeyeon with more tongue.

"Mommy…Yoona…on your knees both of you…fucking clean my cock…it's official now…you're both my whores to breed and restart my clan."

Without any replies, the both of them were on their knees, cleaning up your cock.

You hiss in pleasure as both their tongues and sweet lips worked your tip and they cleaned every bit of cum left. They shared it between them and you pressed their heads together to make out with your cock.

"I've been developing a kido spell…" You say before using the enchantment and a marking of the Uzumaki clan forms just above their cunt before disappearing.

"what is it supposed to do baby?" Yoona asks innocently.

Taeyeon is also curious and is just waiting to see what you answer

"This will make it so nobody else is allowed to fuck you…your body will only respond in pleasure to my touch alone."

"Oh someone is possessive!" Taeyeon and Yoona say at the same time

"Of course…my clan…my whores…I need to keep it all in line…now then…YoonA..I think you should move to the clan compound. We can use this place as a safe house."

"Oh am I finally being allowed to move into the Uzumaki's compound" Yoona questioned

"Yes you are, You belong to me now so you should stay where I can reach you any time I want," You reply

YoonA stands and kisses you lovingly.

"Good…it's settled then… let's head back. I have my first official day tomorrow so let's try and take it easy for the rest of the day."

"Yayyy!" Yoona cheers as she puts on her robe and begins to grab things that she will need.

The three of you get back and head back into bed. You were so happy having them on either side of you…you snuggle with Taeyeon and kiss her.

"I love you, mommy. You're mine."

"What about me?" Yoona whines as she hugs you

You kiss her too.

"And you too.." All three of you drift to sleep shortly after.

[pacifierbby]

★ *. * · 𝑱𝑬𝑨𝑳𝑶𝑼𝑺 𝑯𝑬𝑨𝑹𝑻𝑺

𝑹𝑬𝑸𝑼𝑬𝑺𝑻𝑬𝑫? you could write something about jealous Lando pleasee. Honestly, I don’t really know what it could be, fluff, smut, or angst. I’ll leave it up to you ♡

୨ৎ 𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆 LN4 x reader

୨ৎ 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 none

୨ৎ 𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐓

-𝑵𝑨𝑽𝑰-

He could never understand why you dated so many dickhead men all of them lead to you ringing him up in the middle of the night crying for him to pick you up because yet another fight has occurred leading him to console you over a bottle of wine and some much-needed cuddles he just wished that you would open up and see everything he did for you was because he fell madly in love with you he was just coward to even tell you scared to even ruin the friendship between the both of you making him move into self-pity when you go crying to him wishing he would tell you how much he loves you. The day you told him that you've got another boy on the block that you think it's going really well and that maybe he's the one and not one toxic trait coming from him did massively hurt lando he just wished for your sake that that was true and that you found the one.

You and Lando chilling in his Monaco apartment the sun shining through the big bay windows giving you a soft glow "Hey Lando what are you doing tonight?" looking over to you "Uh nothing tonight was thinking off chilling in for the night" shrugging "well me and ben thinking about going to that new club if you want to join" making his smile instantly fade quickly smiling so you didn't notice "uh yeah sure" making sure that you didn't notice which you were more engrossed in your phone than him at the moment having this small feeling that something was going to go wrong tonight but he keep that between himself knowing it will probably cause a fight between you both the last time he announced his thoughts about your ex you told him that everything was wrong and stopped being an arsehole and that he was using you to get to him was completely wrong when later down the line he was right and you apologised massively for that and ever since then he watched you figure your ex-boyfriends out yourself.

Lando always knew how you felt after that and you told him that a couple of guys before that did try and use you to see him and ever since then he promised himself and to you that he would never bring the conversation up again knowing how much that it affected you which you were happy that he listened to you and your feelings Lando didn't know that deep down that you wished he was something more to you but just like him you was a coward to even tell him and that all these guys are just to push your feelings away from him and with Ben that worked greatly. As much as it hurt him it hurt you seeing him with so many women daily making you separate from him for a little which he never understood why but it was easier for you like that.

"Ben said that's great and we are going at 8 o clock is that okay for you?" looking away from your phone towards him "Uh yeah will it be fine for me to invite Margarida? Making your heart stop a little "Yeah yeah that's fine" getting up from the comfort of the couch "Well I'm going to go back to my apartment to get ready I think Ben is going to pick me up so I'll meet you at the club?" making Lando nod walking over giving you a side hug walking you over to his door.

He knew he shouldn't have asked if his recent hook-up could come but he really needed to get you and Ben out of his mind for the rest of the night only he could think that Margarida would be a better option other than alcohol quickly sending her a text. He never told you that she was a hook-up he just wanted you to automatically think that they were together hoping for some kind of reaction from you which you didn't really show. he doesn't know how long he can put this charade up for...

8 o'clock came quicker than he hoped the sun slowly moving down behind the clouds sighing and looking at himself in the mirror "Hey babe do you like my dress" rolling his eyes " Marg haven't I told you to stop calling me that?!" he couldn't really stand her voice at the moment "but yes yes I do now come on they're here" not even give her another chance to change the godamn dress for the seventeenth time that hour.

The new club was lively tonight well obviously they are all here for the same reason you are. Looking towards Lando I saw that he was more interested in the glass than whatever Marg was actually saying to him which was odd but you cant deny Lando had picked a really gorgeous girl slim, blonde hair a model all-check box list that you couldn't really check for him yes you was jealous of Marg knowing that she has something that you don't which you truly wished you had "hey Lando shall we get the drinks?" ben spoke interrupting your thoughts which honestly you was actually thankful for but looking at lando it's like his thoughts been interrupted to "uh yeah sure"

Lando looks over towards you every chance he can get to make sure you are okay "So you and Marg eh?" Ben spoke making his eyes leave you "' we're really not together she's just one of my huck-ups" taking a sip of his beer while waiting for the other orders "Oh well if we're on that category" Ben paused "I'm only with her because of you" making Lando look back at him furious his hands tightly around his glass "What!" Lando automatically wants to meet his hands with his face but he knows he cant "Well you're cool and she's your friend so she is my better option" he laughed a little not really observing that Lando was mad "Are you joking Ben that women has everything that you need why!" "well the sex is another good thing" that was it for Lando his fist connecting to his face.

However, y/n saw everything running towards the boys "What the hell Lando!" dragging Ben next to her and looking at his face "Tell her what you told me tell her!" Y/N looked confused towards Ben but only he smirked: "I don't know what you're talking about?" Lando's hands fisted once again "this dickhead told me he only wants you Y/N because you are my friend and I quote that sex is another good thing" She didn't want to hear more "Please tell me he's joking Ben please" but ben just shrugged and nodded "then Lando had the right to hit you and hear I am stupid defending your dumb arse" she didn't want to see her cry that just shows that he won Lando grabbed her hand walking her out off the club

"I'm so sorry Lando I'm so sorry to defend him over you I don't know what to say" the tears slowly coming out Landos hand automatically wiping them away "Listen love I totally understand you didn't know you didn't listen you wasn't their I get it" out off all the words Lando know what to do or say he knew how to console you and everyday you was grateful for it "shall we go home" you just nodded wanting to get away from this club.

Both Lando and Y/n are wide awake in two separate rooms both of them thinking the same things after tonight y/n truly knew her forever was and it was under her nose forever and honestly it only took for tonight to find out the jealous thoughts when he had women surrounding him wanting to just grab him and just be hers she felt silly letting all these men degrade her when there was one man who praised her made her feel loved and praised the floor she walked on. For Lando, he thought the same the constant jealousy for all the men that she dated.

y/n walked into Lando's room she just about saw his shadow wrapped around the quilt in his bed "Are you awake" she whispered his figure slowly waking up "Come here" his voice responded lifting his quilt covers inviting in quickly jumping in "Thank you for tonight Lando I couldn't thank you enough" Lando grabbed her hand she was thankful that it was dark but the blush she had on her face will probably make her like a tomato "can I be honest with you?" Y/N nodded "Uh Y/N I like you no I love you. you honestly don't understand everything I feel when you tell me you got another boy but after tonight everything I think is because I fell for you a while ago and I'm so sorry that it took me this long to tell you" Y/N leaned over turning the bedside lamp on looking towards Lando's eyes "honestly Lando it took me tonight when in bed with my own little mind to finally understand what I'm actually feeling is that I'm falling in love with you as well I just want to say thank you for making me feel the way I should feel from a man" Lando leant over wiping the tear away from her cheek the one she didn't notice that even left her "can I kiss you" Y/N nodded both of them connected they're lips and after that she knew that Lando was forever.

˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆ © 𝘱𝘢𝘤𝘪𝘧𝘪𝘦𝘳𝘣𝘣𝘺

[moghedien]

Shadowheart navigating being a cleric of Selune post game has to be like…the funniest thing to behold

Because she has a few options:

1) just don’t ever do any cleric stuff outside of her little farmhouse cottage and don’t worry about it

2) do cleric stuff but lie and pretend that she definitely knows what she’s doing and wasn’t a Sharran like a week ago

3) do cleric stuff and be honest about being a Sharran a week ago

And like any of those options are potentially hilarious l because if she like actually pursues doing Selunite cleric stuff, she has basically no history and is just popping up out of no where. The cleric and paladin that converted her have been dead/presumed dead for a century. They have no current religious community (the last one they had was forcibly converted to Shar and destroyed) and might actually have reasons to not want to get immediately caught up in one. The likelihood that they would be able to point Shadowheart at any kind of like help or resources is slim as they’d probably be fumbling in the dark with only slightly more context than her about the current state of Selunites

Like literally the only thing that would make any of this easier for them is that Aylin is literally Selune’s daughter and can probably prove that though she seemed to have some issues she needed to discuss with her mommy at the end of her questline so maybe not, and all of that is even assuming Shadowheart goes to Isobel and Aylin for help/direction

So you potentially have Shadowheart stumbling her way into congregations either like “hello fellow Selunites. I too love the moonwitch I mean moonmaiden” or you have her being like “hello I used to follow Shar but I failed at becoming a dark justiciar and now I’m going to follow Selune look I dyed my hair and everything”

Like either she tries to not bring up Shar and pretend she converted randomly or some other way and it immediately becomes clear that she somehow converted and became a cleric knowing very little about Selune and Selunite rituals/practices yet has a lot of preconceived ideas about Selune that are probably wildly wrong even when she’s trying not to be hostile to Selune anymore, and thus immediately becomes suspicious

Or she’s honest about being formerly Sharran and immediately seems suspicious and off because of that as she has to try to explain her life story that she does not remember and how she converted because she met a hot buff lesbian tied up in a magic circle who was a real demigod and it’s not weird that she converted on the spot, she swears! Anyway can someone teach her like the basic beliefs of being a Selunite? The buff lesbian wouldn’t stop fucking her wife long enough to teach her.

But then the more likely option of her just not even trying to deal with the clericy activities of being a cleric and she just minds her own business collecting baby animals and taking care of her family. Which is like a slow burn in its humor potential because presumably she’s not gonna live in the literally middle of no where and there will eventually be neighbors and some kind of community she’s part of, and she’s just becomes known as the nice little half elf girl who loves animals and just takes care of her aging parents, who are devoted Selunites. And her having healing abilities would probably come up, because that’s a useful skill to have, especially in a small community, and healing magic plus Selunite parents would eventually cause people to put two and two together even if she didn’t advertise it. And you know that would lead to more questions about why she doesn’t advertise it and why she doesn’t do any Selunite practices for the community and you know she actually doesn’t seem to know a lot of stuff that other clerics of Selune do/teach, why would that be when she’s clearly a powerful cleric and has a devote family. And also what’s up with that big ass wound on her hand that’s flaring up all the time? Also it’s all very suspicious especially since they all just came from no where one day.

And you know that eventually it would lead to a point where Shadowheart and/or her dad would have to just be like “ok so what happened was…”

[heian-era-housewife]

Toji doesn't sing. He never remembers the lyrics. He doesn't keep track of band names. The song you danced to at your wedding? Not a clue. Because Toji doesn't sing.

So when Toji comes home to find you inconsolable, sobbing unintelligibly into his chest as he wraps his arms around saying "What's wrong?" "What do you need?", the last thing he expects you to ask is if he'll sing to you.

"You want me to what??"

"S-sing for m-me?" You hiccup between sobs.

"Doll... you know I can't do that..."

"Yes you c-can!" You sniffle. "Just anything. I don't care what it is. I just want to hear you sing..."

"Babe..."

You give him the look. Worse than the saddest puppydog eyes, you give him a look of utmost hurt and betrayal as fat tears roll down your sodden cheeks.

Toji shifts uncomfortably, weighing his options. He'd sooner return to the Zen'ins than be forced to sing. He doesn't even know any songs.

But as you return to softly sobbing in his arms, giving up on your simple request, he realizes there's nothing he wouldn't do to try to make you happy.

He takes a steadying breath. And then...

"Happy birthday to you..."

You freeze. Body still and quiet as his voice comes to you low and wavering from the depths of his chest.

"Happy birthday to you..."

He's terribly off key. And it's nowhere near your birthday.

"Hhmm hm hmm hm hmm hhhmmmmmmm"

Wow. Does he really not know all the words to "Happy Birthday"?

"Happy birthday to you..."

You stare, stunned. Frozen in your utter disbelief. He looks at you with an apologetic smile.

Now the tears fall twice as fast, strangled sobs mixed with laughter muffled against the front of his ruined shirt.

"Woah! Baby, why are you crying? I-I sang for you, isn't that what you wanted?" Toji scrambles to find where he went wrong.

"It was - hic - it was - hic - it was so beautiful!!!" You collapse into a fit of tear-stained giggles. Wet sobs and soft laughter coming in equal parts.

Toji's lost. He can't understand and you doubt he ever will. But the fact that he tries. That he'd do whatever he can just to see you smile. That is why you love him. That is why he'll always be the one you turn to. Even if he can't hold a tune.

[hypnoneghoul]

The Ashes Call My Name

WC: 5k

Relationship: Rain/Everyone (Rain/Dewdrop, Rain/Mountain)

Tags: Ehlers-Danlos Rain, POTS Rain, Mobility Aids, Anxiety, Self-Esteem Issues, References to Depression, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Implied Anger Issues

He has been ignoring things for far too long and he can’t do that anymore. Or. Rain gets mobility aids and has a lot of thoughts and feelings about that.

Notes: Commission for @everybodyshusband :3

Read under the cut or on AO3.

The box is ridiculously huge.

Couldn’t they have…folded them? Or get a box that is not going to be more than half empty? It’s a whole business, is it not? Can’t they get custom size boxes for their products?

Rain is stalling; thinking about everything and anything except what actually is inside said box. Besides the air and foil. He does not want to think about it, he just wants to ignore it all.

But he can not.

He has been ignoring things for far too long and he can’t do that anymore.

He can do it—he tries to tell himself—but these simple things seem so big and so scary to him right now; and he’s not even regressed.

Rain’s pack knew this was not going to be easy for him and they all offered their support—whatever he might need. The water ghoul shut the door, though, wanting space, and now he is all alone with the monster that his new mobility aids are.

Two pairs of crutches—one full size in classic black and one small version for when he’s small; these are a glittery purple. Apart from that there is also a simple foldable cane in there—also black. Aether, Swiss and Dewdrop decided he needed to have options; they were the ones to place the order. Zephyr and Omega have also been consulted so that Rain would get what is best.

And now the best is here and Rain is a fucking cunt.

After a while he growls at himself in his mind and with his jaw clenched pulls the mobility aids out of the box. One by one he unwraps all the foil from around them and removes the additional protection before finally being able to take a look at them. 

They are not ugly, his pack did good in case of picking the style—they know Rain better than he knows himself. But it’s not about that.

It’s about what they mean, how they are going to become a big part of his everyday life. Well, how they are supposed to become a big part of his everyday life.

Rain is scared—he has been since his initial diagnosis; just a few months after he has been summoned. He thought it was normal to be in pain Topside, but after a heart-to-heart with Aether he found out it is very much not. The other quintessence ghoul—Omega—examined him and explained that sometimes summonings go wrong and the ghoul comes out…well, wrong. In Rain’s case his body is a little loose where it’s not supposed to be and that leads to him having a plethora of issues.

He thought he had accepted his fate long ago—after a lot of mental breakdowns—but now when it has become so bad he is all but being forced to use mobility aids, he realizes he has not truly accepted anything about it.

He's a ghoul, for Satan's sake—an immortal demon. How and why is he broken?

Logically he knows the…science behind it, but he has never managed to find an answer to ‘why’? Why him?

Of course, if Rain was presented with a choice of transferring his pain to someone else he would never do so. Being essentially stuck in one's own body—something that is supposed to be theirs only to have control over—and being forced to have one's life restricted just for that reason is…well, awful.

Rain is mean quite often, but he would never even joke about that.

He doesn't even have the energy to be mean now. Not to himself, not to the mobility aids, not his to his pack and not to the entire fucking world. The water ghoul is just tired and it is hard for him to see a point in trying harder.

Even if…try harder to do what? Omega told him there is nothing to be done for him. He is only going to be getting worse year by year. The pain is never going to go away.

Rain does not remember what it means to be pain-free, anymore.

What did it come to?

Maybe Rain should just go back to the Pit—beg to be sent back. It would fix him, issues like his do not exist down there. It’s not like he is very useful Topside, and he will only be becoming more of a burden.

The water ghoul wonders if his pack would understand if he made that choice. If his wish would even have a chance of being granted, or if he would have to take the matters into his own hands.

Traumatizing his family is not his goal, though, so he would rather not have to.

It's hours after the water ghoul has opened the package when he finally decides to try his new mobility aids out.

He gets up and kicks some thrash under his bed and desk to make a path to walk through. He goes for the cane first and it's not long before Rain can’t hold back his tears. He can’t even walk with it properly—at least he thinks so—it doesn’t feel right. It feels wrong.

His eyes sting to a point of pain, but he realizes he doesn’t care. No one is there to witness the pathetic image of him like this, anyway. The water ghoul lets the tears flow as he clumsily walks around his room, trying to think positively, trying to look for some benefits of this situation.

Rain finds none, there is no relief as he uses the cane. His cane.

But he carries on for a while longer—until the tears dry on his cheeks and more does not follow, until his entire body is sore from walking and crying and all the stress.

He tries the crutches, too, for a short moment, but they are even more overwhelming.

Rain goes to bed early, after throwing the damned things under his bed with as much force as he could muster up—hoping they would break. He knows it wouldn’t change much; the pack would get him another pair, not minding the money. Rain can’t do that to them, though, they do not get paid enough for that. 

He grabs his phone for his usual pre-sleep doom scrolling. He finds a few messages from the pack, but doesn’t cheer much when he sees that it is even more motivational TikTok videos about how mobility aids are exactly that—aids—and they should not be seen as a burden, but rather a tool to help one live their life more fully. Logically, Rain knows that is true and he is all in for people using mobility aids of all kind, but…well, people. Humans.

Not a ghoul.

Not him.

He turns his phone off after a few minutes and wraps himself up in his comforter—he has to change the position after a moment, though, because his bent elbows start to hurt. He closes his eyes and wishes to wake up in a better world, where all this is nothing more than a cruel dream.

Rain wakes up in pain. Of course he does—that is not new.

What is new is the pain in his hands, though. When he wakes up enough to think clearly, he realizes the cause and gets even more angry about the whole thing.

Weren’t mobility aids supposed to be helpful? How is trading the pain in his legs for the pain in his arms fair? As a bassist he needs his arms painless even more than his legs, does he not?

He makes his way down to the common room just for a second—to grab a quick snack that could count for breakfast and then return to his room to wallow in his misery. 

The next time Rain leaves it it is for dinner that he spends half-dissociated. He does not remember moving to the couch, but he finds himself curled up in its corner, wrapped in a big crocheted blanket made by Cumulus.

„What’s got you so lost in thought, fish boy?” Dewdrop’s voice snaps Rain out of it. He didn’t even notice him coming over and the fire ghoul is already sitting comfortably on the couch next to him.

“Huh? Oh–uh, nothing important,” Rain replies, shrugging and starting to worry his bottom lip between his fangs. “What’s up with you?”

Dewdrop does not answer him, not right away; he stares deep into the other’s eyes without blinking for a few moments. His own amber ones are piercing and Rain finds himself desperate for an escape, but there is none—not from Dewdrop.

“Are you alright?” the fire ghoul finally asks.

And despite wanting to say ‘yes’ so badly, Rain can not lie so outwardly. Not to him. “Yes? No? I don’t know?”

The fire ghoul hums in acknowledgement and without a word stands up. Rain watches with furrowed brows as Dewdrop disappears into the kitchen. He comes out a moment later with a literal armful of snacks and drinks—despite having eaten dinner less than half an hour ago—making Rain chuckle at how comical the image is.

“Droplet, what are you doing?” he asks.

“We are watching a movie,” Dewdrop informs him before dropping his cargo onto the couch next to Rain. He grabs the TV remote next and one more fluffy blanket out of their blanket basket before flopping down by his mate himself.

The water ghoul, of course, does not protest when Dewdrop shuffles in as close to him as possible and curls up against his chest—all warm and purring. It’s extremely cozy and Rain is so grateful for Dewdrop’s method of comforting his mates. He is not great when it comes to talking about one’s feelings, but he sure does know how to distract and cheer someone up.

“What do you want to watch?” he asks and Rain could just about melt over his voice vibrating as he does not pause his purring.

“Uhm…something funny. Like–I want my stomach to hurt from laughing, you know?”

“I’ve got just the thing.” Dewdrop grins and pokes out his tongue as he looks for the movie and then puts it on. For a while Rain stares only at him, ignoring the TV, and all the thoughts from earlier come back, nagging at him.

Dewdrop is so good to him, always taking care of him so well, but it’s just…unfair. Rain should take care of him, too, but he does not and he is only going to become more needy and less able to return the favor.

Surely, the fire ghoul will grow tired of him and turn to someone else, to someone who can give him what he needs whenever he needs it, not only when they are feeling good.

He can’t even–how would he even carry his own bass if he has to walk with the crutches? They will make him even more useless than he is now, he can endure the pain if it makes him less of a burden.

Rain is sick of himself.

Dewdrop shaking against him makes the water ghoul’s head snap in his direction; afraid that he has unknowingly—somehow—made his mate cry. Thankfully he’s only laughing and Rain fakes his own so it’s not so obvious he was zoned out again.

He takes a few deep breaths and focuses on Dewdrop’s warmth, the vibration of his purr, and the movie. It actually is hilarious, the fire ghoul made a great choice. He grabs Rain hand at some point and does not let it go until the movie ends, rubbing his thumb back and forth over the water ghoul’s pale skin.

When the first movie ends and more than a half of their snacks are devoured, Dewdrop puts on another one before Rain could protest. He wasn’t going to, either way, though.

The fire ghoul does not speak much as they watch, but when the second movie ends and he is about to put on the third, he turns to Rain. He gets real close and kisses him between the horns, then on the tip of his nose, and then on the lips, before whispering straight into his mouth, “You know I would go around the whole world carrying you on my back if that would be your wish?”

It punches the air out of Rain’s lungs a little and he feels the need to say it would never happen, that he would not ever demand anything as insane of his mate, that Dewdrop can not actually mean it, but—but the fire burning in his eyes is so bright and pure, Rain can do nothing else but nod in acknowledgement.

“I love you, too, but–" Rain sighs, “what if it’s going to get so much worse and–and I’ll become fully dependent on you, I–I couldn’t ever put that on you…”

“Hey, you’re not ‘putting anything on me’,” Dewdrop says, making air quotes as he does. “You’re my mate and I love you and you can’t get rid of me now even if you tried. I’m not going anywhere, whatever happens. I thought I made that clear years ago.”

“You did,” Rain chuckles sadly. The reassurance is nice, but…the fear of making his mate end up miserable and unfulfilled because of some stupid promise he made a long time ago will not go away anytime soon. “Thank you.”

“I enjoy taking care of you, Rainy,” Dewdrop kisses him once again, holding the water ghoul’s face between his hands like the most precious thing. “I don’t mind  if that’s the only thing I get to do for the rest of my life. No matter what, the only thing I need to be the happiest ghoul ever is you by my side, alright? No matter if you can or can’t walk.”

Rain is the one to pull his mate into another kiss, closing his eyes and the distance between them before Dewdrop can see the tears in his eyes. He knows, though—of course he does—and he understands. When they pull away the fire ghoul immediately turns away to snuggle back into Rain’s chest and starts their third movie of the evening. Rain sniffles for a while over his head and is grateful to be ignored. The stupid comedy Dewdrop picked makes him genuinely laugh soon enough.

He does not know at which point he fell asleep, but he wakes up still on the common room couch with their last movie paused at the end. Dewdrop is glued to him, half purring, half snoring.

Rain smiles as his chest warms at the adorable sight of his mate. He adjusts his position before taking one of Dewdrop’s hands into his own and closing his eyes to go back to sleep.

The next time Rain wakes up he is alone, but there is a note next to him. The fire ghoul left to start his chores early—he always does that to have the second half of the day to himself and his pack.

The water ghoul gets himself up and into the kitchen first. He grabs a light breakfast and only then goes back to his room to get ready for his own chores—which are not very urgent or even important.

As he is about to leave his mood sours. His mobility aids are set by the door and all but mocking him.

Rain decides to take half a step towards him winning.

He takes the crutches with him, but only into his hand. He can carry them around most of the day and maybe try to actually use them when his legs get tired.

It’s not a bad plan and he is not even overthinking for the first few hours; it starts only when Rain’s hips start acting up.

An hour more and the water ghoul decides he is done for the day and—and to walk back to the den on the crutches. It’s not going terribly—he is walking with his jaw clenched, trying to focus—but it is not going great, either. He keeps stumbling and tripping and losing the rhythm. His arms start to hurt, too.

The stairs turn out to be his demise, though.

It’s just a few steps—barely a staircase, but it wins that fight.

Rain stumbles on the second step and one of the crutches slips off the edge of it and before he even realizes what is happening he is on the floor with one of his legs bent all weird. It doesn’t hurt that much, but all the frustration and embarrassment and everything about this damn situation makes him want to just cry.

So that is exactly what he does, he starts to cry right there on the bottom of the stairs like a child throwing a tantrum for attention. There is no one there, though, and that makes the water ghoul feel even worse.

He feels his mind slipping and there is nothing he can—or wants—to do about it.

...

(the next part is about rain age regressing. if you want to read this fic properly and are okay with reading agere, head over here and then come back here to continue)

Swiss followed through on his promise of asking Zephyr to help Rain. The water ghoul is really anxious about the confrontation, for some reason—but also he has been anxious all the time for the last few days, so he should not be surprised. Zephyr told him to come down to the older ghoul’s den; when he does, they are already waiting for him. They eye Rain when they notice he is just carrying his crutches instead of using them to get there.

“Let’s see what you’ve got first,” the air ghoul tells Rain after brief greetings. They are not using their wheelchair now, as they do most of the time—they have their crutches, too.

Rain grits his teeth and takes a few steps forward with the crutches, randomly picking a gait. Not that he knows much about them. Zephyr tuts right away, though, and the water ghoul turns to them with a questioning look.

“They’re too high for you, first of all,” they explain, “your arms and shoulders are going to give you hell later.”

“Well, that makes sense,” Rain mumbles under his breath; not for the other to hear. He returns to the air ghoul and they take the crutches from him to adjust them.

“The handle should be at your wrist when you’re standing relaxed,” Zephyr says and the water ghoul takes a mental note to adjust his cane and the small pair later, too. He takes the crutches back and tests the new height out and—surely—they do feel more comfortable already. “Alright, now, try to walk with them as if you have two canes.”

Rain obliges, putting one foot and the opposite crutch in front of the other and going forward. It still does not feel right, but he definitely has more control over them now. It’s closer to having just…super long arms now.

“Good,” Zephyr praises with a nod. “Yeah, like that.”

A grunt slips from Rain’s mouth before he can stop it. He feels stupid—he is not a fucking child, he can walk, it doesn’t–

“Put some more weight on them,” the air ghoul adds and Rain tries to focus on his breathing and walking instead of the irrational rage building inside him. “Slower with the crutches, I know it’s an instinct to wave your arms faster but you’ll lose the pace like that.”

“Uh-huh,” the water ghoul replies and hates the fact that Zephyr’s tips work. Maybe he should not have come. If he can’t walk on crutches properly they will cause more harm than good and then he can’t be made to use them daily.

But alas, he came. He even knows why, too.

Rain came because deep down he knows it is the right choice.

He only wishes the rest of his brain would get the memo because it is, frankly, annoying to be so conflicted over something so basic all the time.

Zephyr gives the water ghoul so many tips as their lesson goes on that Rain’s afraid that he has already forgotten half of them. If he was not so prideful he would ask the other to write them down for him, but, well…he is prideful.

At some point the air ghoul tells Rain it’s enough for one day and that both his upper body and mind have to get used to the mobility aids. The water ghoul is grateful for the understanding coming from someone who can relate quite literally. 

Zephyr notices the wet glint in Rain’s eyes and the tension in his expression. They know it too well themself. They come up to the water ghoul to offer a half-hug.

“Sorry, I–nevermind,” Rain mutters.

“It’s alright, I know it’s a lot to handle,” Zephyr says. “Especially at first and especially being a ghoul and everything. Doesn’t seem fair, does it?”

“How do you…deal with it?” the other asks in a quiet voice.

“Well, uh, it didn’t come to me easy,” Zephyr chuckles. “I’d even say I was more stubborn about using mobility aids than you, but without them I was miserable most of the time. Now I only see them as something helpful, you know?”

The water ghoul nods in acknowledgment. He wishes his brain weren't so stubborn.

“It would be great just being alright and not having to rely on things like these,” Zephyr sighs, waving one crutch in the air, “but believe me that the sooner your mindset about mobility aids changes the sooner you’ll find peace.”

Rain finds no answer to that. He nods before turning away and he hopes the other understands. The water ghoul squeezes his eyes against the sting of tears and tries to drill Zephyr’s words into his mind, tries to worm them in between the folds of his brain and make it just listen. It does not—not really, not right away—and so Rain lets the tears of overwhelm flow down his cheeks.

He doesn’t notice Mountain standing by their den’s door and watching him with furrowed brows. Rain gets startled when he speaks, “Are you alright, petal?”

“Oh, shit, Mounty, you scared me,” he huffs, faking a laugh to cover up the wetness in his voice. “Yeah, I’m good. Just getting back from…a lesson with Zephyr.

Mountain does not budge, though—standing strong in Rain’s way, with his arms folded across his chest. “Are you sure?”

Rain nods, but if the earth ghoul will not let him go soon, he will break.

“You don’t have to tell me anything, but just…” Mountain sighs. “Rain, do you want a hug?”

And his tone makes the water ghoul break.

He nods as his bottom lip starts to wobble and Mountain wastes no more time before embracing his packmate. Rain just flops face first into the other’s chest and he chuckles sadly, patting him on the back. They stand like that for a little while, neither saying a word until Rain asks to spend the night with Mountain.

He agrees, of course, and picks the exhausted and overwhelmed ghoul up bridal style to carry him to bed. 

“Do you want someone to join us?” the earth ghoul asks and Rain shakes his head.

“Just you,” he mutters. A few more tears fall before he is snuggled all cozy in Mountain’s huge nest. He joins the water ghoul after a quick shower and Rain melts against his warm chest. He’s asleep in a flash.

A few weeks after Dewdrop’s proclamations and Rain and Zephyr’s heart-to-heart the water ghoul is already quite handy with the crutches. He is using them more than his cane because most of the time both his legs need support, not only one. The cane is now reserved for short outings when he’s feeling confident in his legs. 

There are still bumps in the road—Rain feeling awful mentally and refusing to touch his mobility aids, insisting that he is fine and does not need them. There are moments he falls back into his old mindset of  ‘this is good, but not for me’—his pack always supports him, then, in whatever way he might need it.

So what it took the water ghoul months to get used to mobility aids, to accept needing them, to start seeing them as helpful? Everything is a process and he is lucky to have had his pack’s support all the way, and still have it whenever he is feeling down.

Living with a chronic condition that influences every aspect of Rain’s life is not something he ever dreamed of—obviously—and he would not wish it upon anyone. He is never going to be happy about being disabled, but—in hindsight—he is happy he was pressured into getting mobility aids when he did.

While he thought his life would become limited once he starts relying on aids, it’s the opposite—it has become fuller, because he does not waste as much energy on things as simple as walking anymore; his crutches take that on. His hands might hurt after longer use, but his arms and shoulders have only gotten stronger, and his posture has improved—a side effect Rain had not expected.

Most of all, he is still treated like normal.

That was one of Rain’s biggest fears—that once he grabs a mobility aid he will become less in the eyes of his pack, the Clergy, the Siblings. He could not have been more wrong.

He still is, and always will be just their water ghoul, just their bassist.

He is just Rain.

[rainroses45]

Imagine playing roblox with Sam and Dean

constant arguments while playing murder mystery

Dean being confused the entire time just screaming “who tf is sheriff?!?” while not noticing he had the gun

meanwhile sam would be chasing you across the map and killing you

“SAM I LITERALLY TOLD YOU NOT TO KILL ME UNTIL I COLLECT ALL THE COINS YOU NINCOMPOOP!!!”

“I TOLD YOU TO DUCK!”

sam would eventually go for dean since he was the only one left and he had the gun

“SAM GET TF AWAY FROM ME!!”

“i just want to talk dean, i just want to talk” he would say with a smirk

you would be screaming at dean looking at his screen “SHOOT HIM SHOOT HIM!!”

sam would end up killing him and then emoting on his dead body

also dean would be arguing in the chat 24/7 and get banned the first five minutes of the game and if sir got voice chat…..that’s a whole different fiasco

dress to impress would be hilarious

sam would pick the girl because of the several clothing options and dean would just be like “pack it up skittle squad”

dean ended up spending robux on VIP and still end up losing to you to which you realized you won with only six stars

“ONE OF YOU DIDNT VOTE ME FIVE STARS!!”

sam would raise an eyebrow at dean to who didn’t even look up from the screen to busy doing the obby

“don’t look at me the hat was not serving cunt..”

“WHY YOU LITTLE-“

my favorite part of this would be them playing horror games while listening to kahoot music

“after you sammy”

“you are the expert on hunting dean i insist you”

and you would be hidden in some closet asking “can i come out now?!?”

“sam’s already ahead of you- OW sam…you suck! ” “yeah but you swallow.”

dean would end up going first into the room and soon let out a high pitched scream at the mannequin moving

“dude we do this for a living it can’t be that scary”

“okay you go first sammy”

after that sam needed to purchase a new laptop after throwing his across the room after a jump scare

BONUS POINTS their avatars are probably bacons or the most craziest thing ever

i’m talking about dean being a giant piece of meat with a party hat or emo pou

sam would try to make his avatar look like himself or just stick with the bacon (sir would end up buying the giant chicken nugget and be forced to wear it)

either way playing roblox with them would be so chaotic

[tmpestuous]

Moth to a Flame - 7

series masterlist

summary: Bucky Barnes was the love of your life, and you were his. There was no denying it. But after two years of dating, you found yourselves on different paths and decided it was best to go your separate ways. The only problem was how drawn you’d always be to him even after moving on.

pairing: College!Bucky x Reader

warnings: blackmail, angst, toxic relationships, arguments, cheating/infidelity (all over the place..)

word count: 6.5k

a/n: this is a long one… a few time jumps but the next 3 chapters will be a lot closer in timeline. enjoy!

—

Sleep struggled to reach Bucky in the past week; he found himself tossing, turning, and ultimately resolving to staring up at the ceiling until his brain decided to turn off and let his eyes shut. His anxiety had been through the roof, and though it was not a new feeling for him, it felt a lot worse with you at the forefront of his worries.

Natasha and Bucky were the only ones who decided it was worthwhile trying to make amends with you. Well, and Pietro. But their plan to talk to him fell short every time Wanda placed a barrier between her brother and her two friends with the most intense glares.

“He’s not up for talking.”

“Wanda, please,” Natasha pleaded. “You can’t seriously believe that Y/n would be capable of doing something this outrageous.”

“I don’t,” Wanda retorted. “But what else am I supposed to believe? Regardless of if she wanted to keep it a secret or not, she decided to do the former. She didn’t tell anyone. We could have prevented this.”

“But shouldn’t that tell you she’s in this situation a lot deeper than she wants to be?” Bucky questioned.

“It tells me that she still felt the need to protect herself over all of us.”

Bucky sighed to himself at the memory, rubbing his face as he prepared to face the day with yet another 3 hours maximum of rest. Not even a cold shower could wake him up enough, the resolve of shutting his eyes while leaning his head against the shower wall tiles cut short by Steve’s knocking on the door.

Alerting his best friend that he’d be out of the bathroom soon, he shut the water off and quickly made his way back to his room after wrapping his towel around his waist. Thankfully, Bucky knew Natasha would be brewing coffee in the kitchen as the redhead succumbed to a similar path as him. 

After getting dressed, he walked out, seeing the steam of the coffee come from his mug on the kitchen counter, Natasha already sipping on hers.

“Have you checked your email yet?” She asked as Bucky blew into the mug.

“No, why?” 

“Bucky, the Stark Internship acceptances went out yesterday and you’ve been holding all of us in suspense.”

“Shit,” Bucky said after a sip before setting his mug back down and pulling out his phone, quickly opening his email.

Natasha watched as Bucky scanned his phone, his face looking more disappointed than relieved.

“Well?”

“I- um,” Bucky stammered, shaking his head before putting his phone away. “I didn’t get it.”

“Bucky–”

“It’s okay, Nat,” he cut her off. “I did get that job with Y/n. I guess I’ll just take that one.”

“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” Steve interjected as he walked into the kitchen, grabbing his own coffee mug that Natasha had left him. “Wanda isn’t gonna be happy.”

“I need a job, Steve. That’s it.”

As much as Bucky wanted to get close to you again and keep an eye on you, he had worked so hard for the Stark Internship. Part of him hated that he had to go work for you instead, especially since it also added to your uncomfortable situation with your boyfriend. It was a lose-lose for the both of you, but he needed an internship. He didn’t want to beg his dad to bend some rules and give him a spot in the family business. This was his only option.

But Steve was right. Wanda wasn’t happy. The group had met up for lunch later that week when she found out and Bucky heard every inch of it. About the lies, the betrayal, about how she can’t imagine even looking you in the face again. Luckily for Bucky, he had to head out for his first day anyway, and ended up leaving during her lecture. 

Bucky could tell from Pietro’s face that he didn’t agree with his sister, but Bucky also hadn’t had the chance to have a conversation with him about you. It was no use asking him there. Natasha had texted him all about her calling Wanda out for being insensitive about the situation, though Bucky didn’t have the energy to reply before walking in to see you.

It had been a week and a half since the incident, and his nerves were eating him alive. Half of him felt the way Wanda did — confused, hurt. He agreed that he would have believed you’d set your pride aside for your friends. But the other half of him knew you wouldn’t just betray everyone like that. After your conversation outside of the hospital—the tremor in your voice, the fear in your eyes behind all of the tears.

“Because it would only make things worse for him. For me. For you.” 

God, he wished you had just told him everything. You immediately shut him down upon his question on what Atlas was holding over you. He knew you.

After calming his racing heart, Bucky got out of his parked car and walked towards the entrance of the building he was told to meet you at. The receptionist was nice enough to let him in even though he was half an hour early, but only because you were already in your office. 

He took a deep breath after making it to your closed door. His closed fist ghosted the air, waiting for the knuckles to press on the frosted window of the door, but his gaze was set on the shadow moving behind it that hadn’t even noticed his presence. Bucky knocked ever-so-lightly, not wanting to test how impossibly expensive the glass was, and the shadow behind the door froze before making its way towards the door. 

Once the door was opened, Bucky was greeted with your gaze, a slightly confused look on your face before you looked over at the clock on the wall.

“You know you’re early, right?” You asked as you turned your attention back to him, but Bucky couldn’t stop looking at you like he couldn’t believe you existed. He hadn’t forgotten anything about you but he had never spent so much time without seeing you, whether in front of his face or across the room. “Bucky…?”

“Sorry,” he said as he pulled himself out of his thoughts, though still staring at you. “Yeah, I know I’m early but I’ve had a really rough morning—well, week— and just kind of really need to dive into some work to distract myself so I thought maybe I’d make a good impression of being overly punctual so you’d let me in.”

Bucky wasn’t usually a rambler. He was a one-liner kind of person, never having too much to say out of fear of saying more than he needed to. You could tell he was anxious, so you nodded and stepped aside to let him in the lab.

It was bigger than what Bucky imagined—open space save for a few tables and some computers atop them. Floor-to-ceiling glass windows and your desk planted in front of one, papers scattered all over.

“I hadn’t really gotten started on anything yet,” you broke the silence. “I honestly wasn’t expecting you to take the offer at all if I’m being honest. I told them to keep you as a last resort since I knew how much you wanted the Stark Internship and that you’d probably take that.”

“I didn’t get it,” Bucky said as he faced you, his back previously to you while he took everything in. Your face was now riddled with more confusion than when you saw him outside your door. 

“What do you mean you didn’t get it? You were a lock for it, Tony even talked you up to his dad.” Bucky shrugged, looking away from your gaze on him. He honestly didn’t want to talk about the dark cloud that had been looming over him since he read the rejection email. Part of him wanted to reach out to Tony and ask what went wrong, but he had felt so defeated lately with everything going on that he didn’t even bother. “Are you okay?”

Pulled from his thoughts for the second time today, he looked at you again and nodded. “I will be.”

You nodded once in return. “Guess we should get started then.”

Bucky was grateful you weren’t being distant with him, but rather the contrary. After you explained all the research directions to him, detailing every instruction on how to collect, analyze, and sort all of the data coming in, everything seemed normal. Your banter was normal, you offered small talk here and there. It was like Bucky finally had his best friend back. 

He hadn’t realized how long it’s been since the two of you had a normal conversation that wasn’t teetering on the feeling of walking on eggshells. He knew he shouldn’t get comfortable given the current circumstances, and was further reminded of that when you spoke up again after a decent pause in your conversation. 

“How is everyone?” 

Bucky looked up from the binder that had his attention to see you hadn’t looked up from your computer screen, probably out of anxiety.

“They’re alright, just… navigating things, I guess,” Bucky answered sincerely. “We all haven’t really talked much about anything, honestly.”

You nodded without saying anything else.

The last thing Bucky wanted to do was to tell you how Wanda’s feeling about him working with you, or about how Natasha and Steve have been more distant with each other than usual given their disagreement on the situation, or how Sam barely likes to be in the room after he hears your name. Everyone in the group was on edge, and unfortunately, it had to do with you. But he wasn’t going to let you beat yourself up over it. It was the last thing you needed. 

You had removed yourself from the group without a word. You packed all of your things when Wanda and Natasha weren’t in the suite, taking everything to what Bucky now knows was your new apartment. It wasn’t cheap by any means, but your parents did agree it was better than paying thousands of dollars for a shared dorm. 

Bucky could tell you were at least content that you weren’t forced to stay with Atlas, whether at his stupid frat house or his own dorm. You never enjoyed it even when you were on good terms with him, so Bucky could only imagine the disdain you held for it now. 

The rest of the day went smoothly, and so did all of the following days Bucky worked with you. He felt back in his element, even though he only got to spend time with you for a few hours in a day. But they were the best hours of each of his days; he cherished them a lot more than he anticipated. Bucky was also grateful he could at least give Natasha updates on how you were doing, given how open you’d been about everything and your halted communication with everyone else. 

Not only were you doing great work with your research, but you were slowly getting your relationship with Bucky back. Having those moments to catch up kept you both so sane.

For instance, on the week of Halloween, you both were talking about costumes and plans, as this was your final Halloween in college.

“I didn’t change my plan for my costume, though,” you said as you highlighted a completed task in your planner. “With everything going on, I didn’t have the time to think of anything else but it’s not like Catwoman was a bad idea to begin with.”

“I guess we’ll still be matching then,” Bucky responded with a chuckle as you looked at him with a surprised face.

“Batman and Catwoman come out on top,” you grinned. “Are you guys even going out this year?”

“Same old party at the sorority house on Kirkland,” Bucky leaned back in his chair. “You going?”

You nodded. “Guess I’ll see you there, Batman.”

And you did. Bucky honestly had to control himself as the sight of you in the hottest Catwoman costume he’d ever seen in his life. Atlas was there, much to Bucky’s dismay, but it didn’t stop him from grinning at you from across the room when the guy wasn’t looking and Sharon wasn’t paying attention. It was a grin you also had no problem in returning before looking away with a face that let Bucky know you were definitely blushing underneath that mask. 

He liked that he still had that effect on you.

More weeks went by and before everyone could process it, it was the week before Thanksgiving. Bucky knew the holidays always made you excited, but your joy was nowhere to be found this go around.

Bucky obviously knew why, with the Friendsgiving tradition you all had coming up, without your attendance. It was bugging him all day to the point that he didn’t even want to go, but he’d never hear the end of it if he bailed. 

3 days before the dinner, Bucky promised Natasha he’d pick up all of the cooking tools and ingredients to take to his place where it’d be happening. He knew she’d only asked him given she and Steve weren’t currently on the best of terms. Bucky usually hated being put in the middle of things, but he let it be for the sake of everything else currently happening in his life.

Bucky and Natasha had also built a much stronger bond in a few weeks than they’d ever had in years of knowing each other, so he tried to see it more as a favor to her instead of her avoidance of Steve.

Natasha wasn’t in her suite, but she let Bucky know the door was open so he wouldn’t have to knock. As soon as he entered, he saw Pietro sitting at the dining table, typing away on his laptop before looking up at him.

“Just the person I wanted to see.”

Bucky chuckled, “Are we gonna talk or is your sister going to banish me again?”

“She’s not here, but she’ll be back soon. What are you doing here anyway?” Pietro lowered his computer screen.

“Picking up some things for Nat then headed to the lab,” Bucky sat across from Pietro. “But I’m in no rush, so tell me everything.”

For the sake of time before Wanda made her way back to her dorm, Pietro kept everything concise. He didn’t hold back, though, telling Bucky about the tape, about him being dragged from the internship fair and his dorm the following night, about you keeping everything to yourself out of fear of putting everyone’s lives in danger. He also mentioned Atlas threatening you with hurting Bucky if you got close to him again, making Bucky realize what you were talking about outside of the hospital.

“There has to be something we can do,” Bucky asserted, his chest aching as the realization sunk about how much you’d been suffering.

“Not yet,” Pietro lifted his computer screen again. “But I have already thought out a plan. It is not going to be easy for you or me at all, but it is the only way.”

Understanding what Pietro meant, Bucky nodded. “I’ll do anything for her, Piet.”

“I know. She won’t like it, but we have no other options. But you absolutely cannot tell her, Barnes.”

Bucky sighed and nodded. Ever since he started working for you, with you, you two were closer than ever. You cracked jokes together, you ate lunch together. You confided in each other about your days, your current stressors. You were best friends again. As much as Bucky wanted to know you weren’t alone, he knew Pietro was right.

Almost as if on cue, Wanda walked through the front door, Natasha right behind her.

“I smell trouble in here,” Wanda spoke up as she set grocery bags down on the kitchen counter. 

“No trouble,” Bucky shook his head and stood up from his seat.. “Was just keeping Pietro company ‘til you came back. I’m gonna take all the things for tomorrow and head out now.”

Natasha eyed Bucky before he whispered to her, ‘I’ll text you’. She nodded in response before helping him grab everything and walking him out to where he was parked outside. Bucky assured her once more that everything would make sense very soon before getting in his car. 

The entire drive to his apartment, the time he spent dropping off the ingredients, then the drive to the research building — he couldn’t take his mind off of you. Bucky, of course, was somewhat relieved that he wasn’t projecting his thoughts about Atlas onto you; but he felt sick to his stomach knowing that you had been suffering for these past few weeks, that you trusted Pietro and not him to know your secret, that you would throw your freedom away to protect him.

Yes, you were protecting yourself as well. You were keeping your job, the work you’d spent so much time and effort on for so long. You weren’t uprooting your research. But there were ways for you to get out of this. He could have helped you, he could have saved you.

Bucky wanted nothing more than to look you in the face and tell you he knew everything. That he was going to do everything in his power to make sure you were safe. But Pietro made it very clear he couldn’t tell you, and he couldn’t go back on his word. Not when it would ruin everything.

So as he sat in his car, mulling over how he was going to play pretend in front of you, Bucky devised a plan of his own. He just needed to get through the next few days.

Once he was calm, Bucky walked into the building, smiling at the receptionist who had told him you had just come in a few minutes ago. With a small ‘thank-you’, he walked to the elevator and headed upstairs.

Once he reached the sixth floor to make his way to the office, Bucky saw the last person he wanted or expected to see.

“Bucky Barnes,” Atlas said with a smug grin. “Been a bit since I’ve seen you, how’s your friend holding up?”

Bucky rolled his eyes. “I have work to get to. See ya around.”

As he walked past the blonde, Bucky shook his head. He could do so much to him. He could beat the smug look off his face and the ego out of his personality. He could ruin his life. But he wouldn’t.

“You know, the Stark Internship is amazing.”

Stopping in his tracks, Bucky looked at Atlas from his peripheral vision. “What?”

“The Stark Internship that you applied for. I’ve only been there about three weeks after someone dropped out, but it is the best professional experience I’ve had,” Atlas chuckled. “I’m honestly surprised she didn’t tell you. Quite a shame you’re missing out, but I can’t say I’d be thrilled working with you.”

And then he was gone. While Bucky was left shell-shocked in the hallway, left to face you. 

Walking into the office, you looked up from your desk, your eyes softening from a more irritated look once you’d realized it was Bucky in the room.

“Bucky, hey,” you said with a half-smile. “You came just in time, I have something to tell you.”

“I saw Atlas outside.”

Making your way in front of your desk which you were standing behind, you crossed your arms over your chest. “I figured, considering he just left. That’s what I wanted to talk to you about actually.”

“So you did know,” Bucky said softly, the familiar ache in his chest from earlier making a reappearance.

“Knew what?”

“That your boyfriend got the Stark Internship I wanted.”

“Yeah, that’s what I was going to tell you—”

“Just because I saw him outside and you knew he’d rub it in my face? Would you have told me if I didn’t see him or would you have kept that from me too?”

Furrowing your eyebrows, you stared at Bucky in disbelief before letting a scoff out, tears welling up in your eyes immediately.

“Wow.”

“Y/n–”

“I don’t know why I would ever believe that we moved past everything,” you shook your head, going back to your desk. “I found out that Atlas has been working at Stark today. That’s what I was going to tell you as soon as I saw you walk in the door. I didn’t know he was working there or I would’ve told you from the first second he stepped through Stark’s doors, Bucky. And I can’t believe you would stand there and think that I’d do otherwise when we’ve been so… normal.”

Bucky exhaled a deep breath before rubbing a hand over his face, his gaze then fixated on his shoes. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry,” he looked up at you as you were trying not to cry, making his way over to you, placing his hands on your shoulders as you avoided his stare. “I’ve had… a day, filled with information that has been tearing my brain apart but that is no excuse for accusing you of lying to me. I’m sorry, dragă.”

Sniffling, you looked up at him with a soft smile. “It’s okay. Maybe we should get to work, okay?”

Bucky was surprised you even forgave him, watching as you walked back to your desk and sifted through some papers. 

But he didn’t press on the issue. Not even the next day. Or two days after. 

It was the morning of the friendsgiving dinner that Bucky had been more than dreading the whole week. Sharon was talking his ear off about outfit choices as he got ready for the day, having to work then rush back to his place and help prepare for the god forsaken dinner. 

But all he could think about was you and the distance you held between you and him for the past four days.

He couldn’t blame you at all. He overstepped, he lashed out and he couldn’t be upset if you didn’t trust him anymore. After weeks of blind confidence in him, he brought you back to square one. Alone. 

“Bucky, are you even listening to me?” Sharon said with blatant irritation, snapping Bucky out of his thoughts. 

“Sorry,” he said before pulling a sweater on. “I have to head out.”

“Seriously?”

“I have work and then the dinner with everyone and I’m just— I’m sorry, Sharon. I’m stressed. You can stay here and get ready, wear the blue dress.”

Before she could respond, Bucky was rushing out of the door, ignoring everyone swamping his apartment after finishing their responsibilities for the day. 

Anxiety had a way of rearing its head for Bucky at the most inconvenient moments, but this, by far, was one of the worst cases. He was counting his lucky graces that he made it to work in one piece, though his anxiety would only get worse the second he had to work alongside you while you were upset with him.

He caught a bit of a break when the building’s receptionist told him you were running late, though it was so uncharacteristic of you to be late to anything. 

Maybe traffic was shitty. Your route from your new place was different from his. 

Even then, you were always early. Usually an hour or two before your clock-in time. Taking a leap, Bucky texted you.

Bucky: Everything okay? Monica told me you were running a bit late.

No response. Bucky rubbed his eyes, knowing he really didn’t need something to add to his list of anxiety triggers at the moment. Deciding it was best to throw himself into work as a distraction, Bucky kept himself busy for an hour.

He’d worked with you long enough that he knew how you ordered all of your research virtually. Color-coding, organizing all of your results by order of the universities they were coming from, ranking the results in order of responses by question.

This research was huge, a study done through an intense survey of students from some of the biggest and most prestigious universities in the country. Being backed by a company as big as Oscorp among others had colleges falling at your fingertips for a chance to be included. Beyond just wanting to work with you, he was so immersed in your work. The least he could do was advance it a bit more for you as you were running late. 

So he did. And an hour and 20 minutes after Bucky walked into the office, you were outside of the door cursing to yourself as you rummaged through your bag in search of your key to the office. Bucky walked over and opened it for you, leaving you staring at him with your hand frozen in your bag and tears in your eyes.

“The door was open,” Bucky said softly, taking in your frazzled state. “Are you okay?”

Wiping your eyes and smearing your mascara as you rushed inside the office, “I had this stupid lunch with Atlas and his parents and it was awful and all I wanted was to leave but I sat there like the good girlfriend I’m supposed to be and listened to him goad on and on about everything at Stark Industries and then diminish everything I’m researching like he’s—”

“Hey,” Bucky shut the door and pulled you into a hug. He noticed you stopped yourself, about to spill everything to him but for the sake of keeping his and Pietro’s plans, he just held you. “You’re okay, I promise,” Bucky looked down at you and cupped your face in his hands, wiping away some of your tears with his thumbs as you sniffled. “I know how much you hate being late so I started on some work. I got through analyzing about 80 results when you came in, color-coded and organized them how you like, all by each school.”

New tears made their way onto your face, Bucky immediately worried he hurt you though you assured him otherwise. After a few beats, Bucky was taken by surprise as you quickly leaned up and kissed him, letting both of your mouths move against each other with unspoken adoration and love before you pulled away breathless.

“I’m— I’m sorry,” you said, stepping back out of Bucky’s grasp, his lips a brighter red now and his cheeks flushed as he looked at you. “I know I hate my ‘boyfriend’,” using your fingers to make air quotes, “but you still have a girlfriend. I’m sorry, I let my emotions kind of take over.”

“I kissed you back, you know,” he said without hesitation.

“Bucky, we can’t—”

“Why not?” He asked as he stepped towards you. “I kissed you back. I kissed you back when you kissed me at that party. I kissed you back now.”

“You still have a girlfriend, Bucky. I just got overwhelmed because nobody’s… cared for me, like that in a while. It’s been so long and I kind of forgot how it felt. But I overstepped and I shouldn’t have.”

“I don’t love her,” Bucky admitted. “I have never loved her, I won’t ever love her. Hell, I didn’t even ask her to be my girlfriend.” 

He stepped near you again, back in your personal bubble as he inched his face closer to yours. He caressed your face with one of his hands once more, before leaning down and kissing you again like it replenished the air in his lungs.

Leaning you against the wall, you wrapped your arms around Bucky’s neck, kissing him back with every ounce of energy you could give as he used his free hand to grip your thigh and wrap your leg around his waist. After a few minutes, you both pulled away, catching your breaths as you stared at each other with longing eyes.

“I don’t think you know how long I’ve been waiting to do that again,” Bucky said as you giggled a bit. “I’d continue but it’s probably not best to christen our place of employment that way.”

“Shut up,” you said playfully, pushing him back softly, keeping your hands on his chest. “I still kind of feel bad.”

“Don’t,” Bucky shook his head, placing his hands on your waist. 

“Are you sure?” You asked, not fully convinced. “I know how long it took for you to move on and I’d hate to ruin that.”

“I promise. I’ve been racking my brain on how to end things with her anyway,” Bucky reassured as he rubbed your waist softly. You nodded without a word, running a hand through his hair, your attention suddenly elsewhere. “Where’d you go, prinţesă?”

“The dinner’s today,” you said softly, still not looking at Bucky. He could hear the melancholy in your tone. “Are you going?”

“Nat might kill me if I don’t,” Bucky joked, which made you smile a bit. “Why do you ask?”

“I wish I could be there.”

Bucky pulled you back against him, kissing your forehead. “Me too.” 

After you and Bucky decided it was best to get back to work, the rest of the day moved swiftly; you and Bucky were back to your normal dynamic once again, though clearly slightly different. 

Bucky was anticipating going through a myriad of situations before he could truly savor your lips on his again. When you kissed him all those weeks ago at that party, it was more solemn—an apology for what was about to come. Though your kiss came out of whatever impulse you had, Bucky had been feeling all those urges too. 

He wasn’t the cheater type at all and, honestly, the thought of it did make him feel like shit. But he didn’t want you to blame yourself for his actions. He wasn’t lying when he said he was trying to break up with her, but something about ending things right before the holidays also made him feel shitty.

As the day moved on, Bucky’s anxiety creeped up on him again. The looming dread of walking into his apartment and having to sit at this dinner pretending like nothing was wrong wasn’t going away anytime soon. Bucky could tell you sensed he was off with the way you were staring at him as he put his jacket on.

“Everything okay?” 

He looked at you and shrugged. “In theory.”

“The dinner will be fine, Buck,” you offered him a smile, somehow knowing how to read his mind as always. 

He felt bad leaving you here at work to attend the dinner you were always excited about. He insisted on grabbing something together, so you at least had enjoyed food with him. However, you warned him of the wrath of the Russian redhead if he showed up to dinner on a full stomach. He couldn’t help but chuckle because he knew you were right. 

You gave him a tight, warm hug before he left. He knew you needed it, even more than he did. He wanted to tell you then and there that he was going to help you, that he’d get you out of the situation you were trapped in. He debated so hard internally, but, once again, he told himself he had to keep his word. 

Once he left the office and made it back to his apartment, Bucky took another moment of silence in his car after parking in his assigned space. A calm before the storm, he convinced himself. After taking a few deep breaths, he got out of the car, locked it, and walked to the entrance. He did his best to quiet his mind as the elevator made it to his floor, as he twisted his keys in the locks, and entered his buzzing apartment.

“It’s about time!” Sam exclaimed from the couch, seated with Steve, Thor, and Pietro in the living room. “We were about to play poker without you.”

“You can go on ahead, I gotta shower,” Bucky said as he shrugged his jacket off. “But when I get back, you’re all getting your asses kicked.”

Smirking at his friends’ complaints as he walked down the hallway, Bucky made his way into his room, seeing Sharon still getting ready.

“Hi,” she said monotonously, sighing when Bucky responded with a ‘hey’ in the same tone. “How was work?”

“Fine,” Bucky responded shortly again, putting his shoes in the closet and grabbing his towel for a shower. As he headed out the door, Sharon stopped him with a question.

“Are you upset with me or something?” Her tone was clearly one of frustration, which Bucky wasn’t in the mood for. “You’ve been avoiding me all week.”

“I’ve had quite a shitty week,” Bucky admitted, knowing it wasn’t too far from the truth. “I just need this dinner to be over with and some time to decompress before we have a talk.”

“A talk? About what?”

“Us,” was all Bucky said before heading to the bathroom. 

He made sure to take an extra long shower, needing a moment to relax before the thing he was dreading all day. He noted Sharon wasn’t in his room when he came out of the bathroom, and he was kind of grateful for it. 

Once he was dressed, Bucky checked his phone as it buzzed, seeing a text from you.

Y/n: hope the dinner goes okay. Still wishing I was there ):

Bucky: Me too. I promise everything will be okay soon.

Y/n: I hope so. 

Y/n: can’t quite stop thinking about earlier.

Bucky knew what you meant, and he couldn’t stop thinking about it either. It was the only thing on his mind, the taste of having you back was consuming his entire being. 

He had to tell Pietro the plan needed to start. Soon.

Bucky: Me neither. You still at the office?

Y/n: might sleep here if I’m being honest

Bucky: I’ll stop by later tonight.

Y/n: no christening the office

Bucky chuckled at his phone.

Bucky: No promises. See you later.

After putting his phone to charge, Bucky stepped out to the living room. The boys were all outside on the balcony, while Wanda and Nat were in the kitchen. He didn’t see Sharon at first but then she stepped out of the half-bathroom and turned her gaze away from Bucky immediately.

“Bucky, would you mind setting the table? Ask Pietro to help you.” Wanda asked from the opening in the wall to see through to the kitchen.

“Yeah, no problem,” Bucky said as he turned towards the dining area after grabbing the plates, seeing Pietro walk in, assuring Bucky that he had already heard his sister. “I guess twin telepathy is a thing.”

Pietro chuckled. “How is she?”

Bucky waited for Pietro to place the table mat in front of a seat before placing a plate. “She’s alright, but I can tell she’s hurting.”

“I was thinking that we should get a start on the plan soon,” Pietro spoke quietly, not wanting anyone else to overhear. “I would hate for this to drag into the new year.”

“Yeah, I agree,” Bucky grabbed the utensils once all of the plates were set, passing half to Pietro. “This weekend?”

“That would be optimal. There is a party at their house on Saturday.”

“How do I get their attention in just two days?”

“You will,” Pietro reassured. “Trust me. After tonight.”

Deciding not to pry further, Bucky thanked his instincts as Natasha and Wanda walked into the dining room with the food. Bucky and Pietro helped free their hands and placed everything on the table, the girls calling out to everyone else.

Bucky could sense Sharon’s tension as she sat next to him, but he opted to do his best to ignore her. He needed to break things off sooner than later.

Once everyone dived into their food and made conversation, Bucky didn’t say much. He hadn’t even realized how empty his stomach was until he started devouring his plate.

“Slow down, Barnes,” Sam joked from across the table. “I know you hate talking but you still gotta chew before you swallow.”

Bucky shot him a glare before resuming his task at hand.

“I think he isn’t talking for other reasons,” Sharon spoke up, surprising everyone at the table, especially Bucky who now stared at her incredulously. “What? You clearly invited me here as a placemat for your missing traitor.”

“Excuse me?” Natasha said before Bucky could retaliate.

“I don’t know why I’m here when Bucky so obviously wishes Y/n was here instead. That’s why you’re cheating on me with her, right? That’s what your silly little job is? Become her lapdog again?”

Bucky chuckled. “You should stop talking.”

“Why?”

“You should stop talking,” Pietro interjected, Wanda silently urging him not to get involved. “Since we are bringing up accusations, why don’t we speak about you cheating on Bucky?”

If Bucky could get whiplash from how fast he turned his head towards Pietro, he would have. “What are you talking about?”

“I have been holding my tongue for a while,” Pietro started. “But I do not think I can sit by and watch you stay with this woman as she is involved with the man ruining the life of the woman you love.”

Bucky was very much confused 30 seconds ago, but he was even more confused now.

“Pietro, I don’t know what you saw—”

“But you do know what I saw, Sharon,” Pietro interrupted. “You and Atlas outside of the fair, kissing. Plotting against Bucky and Y/n. He and his friends took me forcefully while you warmed up to Bucky like nothing happened. Like you didn’t know why I was injured that night. Like Y/n was the traitor when you have been the parasite this entire time.”

“Pietro, why would you not tell us this?” Wanda asked, in as much disbelief as everyone else at the table. 

Pietro stared at Bucky, though Bucky was racking his brain trying to process what the fuck he just heard.

“Y/n is being blackmailed by her boyfriend. I couldn’t admit anything without jeopardizing her safety. But I’m sure it will be jeopardized now,” Pietro threw a smug look Sharon’s way before calmly turning back to his food.

“Bucky—”

“Get out.” 

Sharon pleaded with him, but Bucky cut her off once more.

“Get the fuck out before I throw you out of here.”

With tears in her eyes, Sharon rushed out of the apartment, Bucky standing up to lock the door behind her before walking back into the dining room.

It was so silent, Bucky once again became self aware of his racing thoughts, needing to break the ice—a rarity for him.

“Is there anything someone wants to say?”

“Yeah,” Steve said, rubbing Nat’s shoulder while she was trying to process everything and staring at his best friend. “How do we kill this asshole?”

[gor3sigil]

What being trans means to me

I love being trans. I love transitioning. The thing is, most of the time, I read about other trans people experiences. And I just can’t relate.

I have plenty of tattoos and piercings, and if I have to be 100% honest with y’all, I see transitioning like a bodmod. To me, getting top surgery was one, as I wanted to at least get my nipples removed before I even knew top surgery was an option.

I see HRT as much as a bodmod. A few years back, I wasn’t so sure I even wanted HRT, but after thinking it through and doing a lot of research, I decided to do it. And I never looked back. I’m close to 2 years on T, which isn’t a lot, and I don’t even know if I plan to stay on T for very long, maybe I’ll stop at some point. Who knows.

It goes hand in hand with the everlasting identity crisis I’ve been having since I was born, basically. I was a different person before, and she was so tired, so she left the body to some dude, and he got tired, and they fused, and it was me, and I’m in a trans body, I’m trans, I take T like I paint my nails, I take T like a cigarette, I take T like a hot bath. It’s comforting, it makes me feel good, it makes me feel at home in this body.

I got surgery because I wanted my silhouette to be mine. I changed my name because since I was little, and that’s the only point for which I can say confidently I knew since I was a kid, I never understood why we couldn’t name ourselves. To me, a name was so intimate, so personal, that I couldn’t understand why it had to be someone else’s choice. So I took a new one and changed it.

And now I look at myself in the miror and I’m Cyan, and I got a flat chest, and I have a deep voice, and I’ll do my T shot on friday just like I do every 14 days since almost 2 years, with the same pleasure, with the same smile on my face, the same rush I ever have when I’m excited for my shot.

Close to the feeling I get when I get a new piercing, when I up the size of my lobes, when I feel the first tingles of the needles that tattoo me.

I didn’t “always knew” I was trans. I remember being a kid with a shit ton of OCs, and names for myself that I couldn’t choose, and whose dream was to live a thousand lives before I died. I don’t know who I will be in 3 years. Or in 6 months.

It says on a letter that I suffer from gender dysphoria, and by all means it was true before top surgery. Not so much now. I still am insecure about my body a lot of times because there’s some things missing to my chara design and I am fatter IRL lmao, but with this body I cum, I eat good food, I get drunk, I smoke, I feel hot and fresh water, I swim, I sing, I write this. Even when it’s half broken and it’s raining and my joints ache and I feel like I’m already old, I love this body. I’m not the type of people who will be like “your body is a temple, you HAVE to exercise and eat only fresh veggies” because if I have to be here let me at least have fun. I take care of myself though, maybe not as much as I should, but the best I can.

If I hadn’t overcome everything I did in my life, maybe I wouldn’t have transitioned. Or maybe I would. I don’t care. I don’t need a reason, and neither do you.

This is what I mean when I say that everyone should do whatever the fuck they want because, I wasn’t born trans, or at least I don’t think so. But does it make my transition less valid ? No. I’m better in my skin that ever, even when the low self esteem hits, and I know I would feel way less good if I hadn’t transition. That’s all that matters.

[ghostradiodylan]

Probably a lukewarm take, but other than the (lack of an) ending, the Laura and Ryan scenes are some of the worst written and conceived parts of The Quarry.

And this is completely separate from whether Ryan is interested in Dylan (he is, but that's another post and not important to this rant) or Kaitlyn; even if Ryan had no other potential relationships in the game, even if Laura wasn't practically married to Max, wearing his ring around her neck the entire time they're talking, it still would feel flat to me because nothing about it is earned.

Laura is on a killing spree with the single-minded goal of saving Max. She genuinely believes the only way to do that is to kill Chris Hackett. Even if you've made her argue with Max to the extent that they can, they're still a strong unit when she goes out to solve this werewolf thing once and for all. Even if you don't believe in love think their relationship would survive all this trauma, she deeply believes she owes it to him to rescue him, that is her entire guiding ethos during the game.

Ryan is going with her to try to keep that from happening because Chris has been his friend and mentor for years. We know Ryan has an absent mother, unmentioned father, and a potentially turbulent family life, and he's been coming to HQSC for so long that it feels like home to him, that Chris and his kids feel like family. Laura has already killed Kaylee. Even if Ryan completely bought into the werewolf thing by now, that would be a tough pill for him to swallow, given his reaction to her death.

Then, they fall in the titular Quarry and suddenly have the option to express a completely unearned sort of camaraderie with each other. Why is Laura asking Ryan about his love life in the first place? The question about him being single makes sense as a dig, but it doesn't make any sense for her to ask about him being a 'brooding and mysterious loner' because... she hasn't actually seen him do anything brooding or mysterious? How did she even get that impression? If Laura's got some kind of borderline psychic intuition then this is really the worst possible use of that ability--she should have foreseen her need to go to that motel and stay the fuck out of locked storm shelters instead.

It doesn't make a lick of sense for her to say that Kaitlyn looks up to him either. She hasn't seen that. Hell, we as players haven't even seen that! Kaitlyn seems generally tolerant of but unimpressed by Ryan. She has the option to be impatient with him multiple times and even get the chyron that she's ‘losing respect’ for him if he suggests she take the gun and go after Nick instead. This seems like an objectively good idea, since she's a much better shot than Ryan, a fact which the game keeps telling us despite refusing to give her a gun until the last possible second, though maybe the concern is that she'd have to drag Nick back to the campfire herself. (Honestly, I think Kaitlyn could do it, I think she's like a mighty ant who can lift many times her own weight, but that's not what this post is about.)

Ryan, for his part, shouldn't really be willing to talk about any of this with Laura either. He canonically doesn't even want to talk to his coworkers about his animation school decision (in the office scene with Dylan and at the campfire with Emma if you choose truth like a lunatic) and he's known them for at least two months, if not for years attending the same camp. But he met Laura a few hours ago and is suddenly willing to spill his guts about who he does or doesn't have a crush on and who does/doesn't have 'the hots' for him, despite the only experience they have together being her leaving his friend of several years dead facedown in a pool and expressing a strong desire to kill his father figure? I simply do not buy it.

I'm not sure if this was supposed to go along with the relationship system that they scrapped or what (there's not a single shred of Ryan and Laura stuff in the datamine that I've been able to find), but all it really serves to do is muddy the waters by trying to force some level of intimacy on Ryan and Laura before the big confrontation at the Hackett House. But that confrontation itself should have been the thing that forged that intimacy between them and allowed them to go on to fight Silas together.

Overall, I think it's a major sign that the back third of the game got a very rushed and, frankly, bad chop job (which we know is true) and that they struggled to tie the resulting loose threads off in a way that made any kind of narrative sense. It's a shame, because the writing in The Quarry is actually way better than most people give it credit for, it just wasn't allowed to pay off in a lot of ways that clearly were intended.

[nunalastor]

Kid Alastor au

Alastor wasn’t someone you would call patient. His mother tried to instill that lesson into him, but he was always a stubborn child. He had made a gifts for everyone in the hotel, and the last person he needed to gift was Angel. And waiting all night for Angel to come back to the hotel wasn’t an option for him.

Alastor waited for Angel for about an hour until he decided to find Angel on his own. He always wanted to explore Pentagram city without a chaperone and most of the time he felt cooped up in the hotel. Despite everyone saying that Vox was untrustworthy, he made the tv studios he own sound very interesting. Plus Angel worked for him so it would be a good opportunity to see him preform.

It was pretty easy to find Vee Tower, Alastor just had to find the biggest and attention seeking building in the area. He managed to sneak in and look for studio that Angel’s boss owned.

Angel was wearing his robes, ready to finish his last scene for the night until he felt someone was tugging his robe. He turned to face this person and blood ran cold. Alastor was here in the studio with a present for him.

“Alastor why the fuck are you doing here?!”

“I just wanted to give you something, I couldn’t wait so I decided to go look for you.”

Alastor was now shoving the present to Angel and asking him to open it.

“Alastor now is not the time, you can’t be here! Who the hell was supposed to be watching you?”

“Husker but he fell asleep”

“Figures” Angel said with irritation and with a whispered, “goddamnt husk”

“ANGEL! Get your ass on set now!” Both flinched when they heard the moth demon shout.

“I’ll be there in just a sec Val!” Alastor could hear how terrified Angel was, but before he could ask, Angel picked him up and quickly went into the dressing room.

“Stay here and don’t come out until I get you! And you better believe we will be having a conversation about you sneaking out with Charlie about this!”

He shut the door and quickly made his way on set.

“Now that Angel Dust decided to grace us with his presence,” Angel could hear the frustration in the Val’s voice, “we can begin. Action!”

They started with the usual cringe filled dialogue, but before he could say the next line, he heard someone say “Why the fuck is there a kid in my studio!?”

Alastor had left the dressing room and decided to look around the set. But as he looked around, someone had spotted him and quickly informed Valentino so he could stop filming.

Angel ran over and tried to explain the situation. But Valentino wasn’t hearing it.

“Just get this fucking runt out of here or I’ll sell him to some sick fucks! Do you know how many freaks will want a piece of the baby Radio Demon?” Angel felt sick but he felt a tight grip on his wrist and saw Alastor cowering behind him.

“Don’t you ever think of touching him you sick fuck!” Angel shouted as all of his eyes glowed. He didn’t care how tall Val got and before he could lay a hand on either of them, the doors sprung open. It was Vox and Velvet and they looked as if hell was going to implode.

“Val stop what you’re doing!” Vox shouted

“This is between me and my bitch Vox!”

But before Vox could get a word in, Velvet pushed her phone into the moth’s face. It was of a live recording of his studio! The Vees looked and saw many of the employees had their phones out who were either recording or taking pictures.

“You were going live you fucking piss baby! Everyone heard what you just said!”

“Even for hell this is fucking bad! Didn’t you even think about our image!?” Vox shouted, “Everyone shut your phones OFF!!” All the phones in the room exploded. For while the everyone was quiet. When Vox finally composed himself, he said with his TV persona, “Everyone’s dismissed until further noticed.”

The TV demon turned his attention to Alastor and said, “Even now you still manage to cause me trouble”

Vox dragged a pissed off Val to the elevator.

Angel and Alastor left in awkward silence. Alastor could feel the anger Angel was expressing. He knew he was going to be in big trouble.

“I’m sorry”

Angel just sighed, “I know”

He looked at the present Alastor was still holding and could see the boy was holding back tears.

“So what’s this gift you’ve went through all the trouble to give me” Alastor handed him the present and Angel saw it was a cute doll version of him.

Alastor thought it was a good idea to make doll versions of his friends of the hotel, similar to his grandmother’s voodoo dolls. Lucifer was kind enough to help it out even though his specialty was rubber ducks. But the doll that took Alastor the most time to complete was Angel Dust because of the unique design.

“Wow! This so cute Al! I love it!”

Alastor smiled and despite the trouble, he was glad to have given Angel the gift.

(I honestly planned to make this short, where Alastor sneaks in to the studio to give Angel a present and suddenly FBI knocks the door down)

👀

[anna-scribbles]

aroace adrien fic chapter 2!!! and we all cheered

summary:

Kagami fixes her eyes intensely on his face, and Adrien smiles. He scoops peas onto his fork nonchalantly, trying to shake the cloud of guilt that always seems to follow him these days. He always feels see-through when Kagami looks at him like that. When she speaks, it’s matter-of-fact. “Something is bothering you.”

excerpt:

Kagami is a good girlfriend. A really, really good girlfriend.

She makes sure that they go on at least 2 dates per week, and schedules them far in advance. She texts him good morning and goodnight like clockwork. She’s even proactive about cute nicknames, sending him vetted lists of options which they can debate the merits of. If dating was a sport, Kagami would be a gold medalist.

And she kisses him. A lot.

“Good morning, sunshine,” she’ll tell him with a peck on the cheek, catching him on the steps before he goes into school. He’ll grin and she’ll tilt his chin closer, planting one right on his lips.

“Come here,” she’ll coax, swiping away their homework with one hand and tugging at his shirt collar with the other. He’ll look up at her through his lashes and part his mouth just so, letting her press their lips together again and again.

“You’re perfect,” she’ll whisper, pulling him close in the locker room after practice. She’ll run her hand through his sweaty hair and lift her face to his until all his senses go dark.

Kagami is great. Kagami is really great.

And Adrien… Adrien is…

He’s curled around a pillow on his bed for the fourth time this week, caught somewhere between nausea and dread. His homework is unfinished, piano pieces unrehearsed. A lock of hair is irritating his eye but he feels too detached from his body to do anything about it. He hates when he gets like this for a multitude of reasons, but mostly because it doesn’t make sense.

He’s been depressed before. He’s been dissociated before.

But this?

He thinks of Kagami’s lips, warm and sticky with lip gloss, moving against his mouth. He feels her mouth open, tilting to meet him at an angle, and her tongue—

Adrien’s whole body shudders involuntarily and he curls up tighter around the pillow, squeezing it for dear life. Awful. Awful. What’s wrong with him? It’s kissing his girlfriend, the most natural thing in the world. Why does it feel like—why does he feel like he’s dying?

When Adrien closes his eyes, he’s right back there again. Kagami’s firm hands on the back of his neck, holding onto him. Her spit warm in his mouth, the small noises in the back of her throat, the pit carved out like a chasm in his stomach—

“You look terrible.”

Plagg’s nasal voice jars him back to the present. When Adrien looks up, bright green eyes are squinting just centimeters from his face.

Plagg frowns. “Are you still sick? Wait, did you eat some of my moldy brie? You know I said not to touch it until May!”

Plagg zips away, into the cabinet under the trophy case. Adrien takes a shaky breath.

“I didn’t touch your cheese, Plagg.” He forces his fingers to unclench from the pillow and stashes the memory of Kagami’s lips under some rug in his brain. He’s fine. Everything’s fine.

Plagg phases back into view, breathing a sigh of relief. “Phew! That could’ve been disastrous!”

“Yeah.” Adrien sits up and clenches his fists hard, enough for his fingernails to dig into the skin of his palms. The pain wakes him up, brings him back. (It’s penance too, maybe. He needs to be better than this.)

“Maybe you really are sick, then.” Plagg flits around him, poking his nose into Adrien’s belly and armpit and hair and even trying to look in his ears. He pulls back and frowns, cocking his little head. “Geez, it’s been on and off like this for, like, a month. Shouldn’t you go to a doctor or something?”

Adrien adverts his eyes. “I don’t think a doctor would help.”

Not with… whatever this is.

“All I’m saying is, you look really bad. Like, really bad—”

“Thank you. Thanks.”

Adrien painstakingly swings his legs over the bed and puts his feet on the ground, manually shifting weight to each leg. Muscle by muscle, reminding his body how to stand. It’s easier once he’s up. Fog filters through his mind, and then he doesn’t think as much.

The sickness burns off in the shower, seared from his skin. Adrien emerges clean and good and normal and he puts on new clothes and blow-dries his hair. Ready for anything. Ready for—

Nathalie knocks twice on his bedroom door before opening it.

“Kagami is here,” she tells him. “Your dinner will be served shortly.”

read on ao3

[say-hwaet]

The Dynamic Between Arthur and the Marstons (long post )

I guess I should say there are spoilers, just in case…

After playing the story through several times, I have to say, that Arthur Morgan is one of the best characters ever written. Aside from his development, there is so much depth to him, and regardless of his honor, there is so much to unravel.

I’ve been thinking about the relationship that he has between the Marstons, meaning John, Abigail, and Jack, and it really makes sense as to how Arthur acts the way he does around them in the beginning and all the way to the end.

A lot of his behavior, I think, stems from the loss of Eliza and Isaac. It is my opinion that he himself was torn between living a full life with them and remaining loyal to his gang, and before or by the time he had made a choice, it was too late, as they were killed in a robbery. This had haunted him since and it made him extremely bitter. Later in the game, he tells Rains Fall that he realized that he didn’t get to live a bad life and have good things happen to him. I also think that he was with Eliza after Mary had broken their engagement. I can get into my support for this later, but that isn’t what this post is about.

I think that Arthur was angry with John out of jealousy. He is the “golden boy” and clearly was Dutch’s favorite at one point. Not only that but after Arthur loses his own son and lover, John and Abigail get pregnant and he takes off for a year. He abandons his family, which Arthur takes personally. Arthur had tried to do right by Eliza and Isaac and still failed. So when John has Jack and is within the circle of the gang to help and support him, he takes off. Arthur gives up a potential life with Eliza and Isaac for Loyalty to the gang and John throws it all away. When John comes back, Dutch welcomes him with open arms, and Arthur believes that he would have been held to a different standard if he had come back after being with Eliza and Isaac for a long time. And it doesn’t help that John treats Jack like crap in the beginning of RDR2.

Arthur, imo, was a good father to Isaac when he was present. We can see this in how he treats Jack. In Arthur’s journal, he writes how he should have married Abigail, but due to his feelings for Mary, he didn’t. I’m not sure why after years of not hearing from Mary he would say this, but meh. Perhaps, the hope of starting over, or that she did pop in again at some point (which is how Abigail might have met her?). Anyways. I think he says he should have married her so that she would have someone to rely on and that he could be the father Jack needed. He cares about Abigail, but I don’t think it is anything beyond that. Arthur seemed to me not to be one to be with a woman without some sort of relationship, based upon how he treats women and the prostitutes in Valentine, so I don’t think he was ever with Abigail. Even so, Abigail relies on Arthur, and while he puts up a front, he gives her money for clothing and spends time with Jack. Heck, he even tells John to step up and be a dad. In some of Arthur’s conversations with John, he tells him that he can’t be two people at once. He’s speaking from experience. I think he’s subtly telling John he needs to make a choice as to what life he’s going to live. Hosea and Arthur both tell Abigail and John to leave at parts of the game.

When Jack is kidnapped, and eventually rescued, I think it is one of the most heart-wrenching missions and scenes. I can see it in Arthur’s body language that he longs for the family that he once had. He’s alone in his pain and when everyone is celebrating, Arthur doesn’t sing with the gang; there isn’t even the option to do it like it does other times. Even in my first playthrough, it seemed so sad to me. Everyone was drinking and singing, but Arthur just looked so sad.

So, it is at this point that John starts to step up, and Arthur starts to show symptoms of his illness. When he learns of his diagnosis, Arthur’s eyes open to the reality of the gang’s downfall, and he acknowledges the doubts/reservations he has about Dutch’s plans and schemes. He isn’t blindly loyal anymore. He tries to get John, Abigail, and Jack out, so that they can have the life that he had lost due to loyalty to the gang. He continually tells John to get out and that it would mean a lot to him. In his journal, after rescuing John from prison, he writes in his journal “…We’ve argued over the years, but I’ve grown to care a little for [John]. He’s less of a fool than he was, and maybe he can have the luck that has eluded me. Jack is an innocent little boy. In him, I see what I missed [meaning Isaac]. We did it.” This speaks volumes to me about how he feels about them in the end. He sacrifices himself to let John live. And though it isn’t forever, Arthur dies believing that he made it, and that matters. And hopefully, he could finally be at peace and see Eliza and Isaac again.

I could keep going, but I think I am too long-winded. I guess that helps when writing fleshed-out fanfiction stories, but not for posts. LOL

Would love to hear other thoughts or opinions, I’m always keen for a discussion.

[butmakeitgayblog]

I need a one shot of the first time Clarke is alone with Sal. Do they just stare at each other? Play? Does Lexa come home to find them passed out cuddle up with empty plates lol

A summary will have to suffice because I have,,, way to many wips 😂

But it would be an experience.

Truthfully it'd be Clarke being a bit nervous but also jazzed but also very like "Lexa. He is... a dog. I'm not sure if you remember, but I raised an entire child. A human being. I think I got this. You can go, we'll be ok."

So Lexa would go. Affectionately bumping heads with the moose once in a reminder to behave himself, and kissing her girl twice on the lips in 'thank you' for holding down the fort while she runs into school for a last minute department meeting. Reminders that he won't need to eat until she's home getting tossed over her shoulder while she snatches up her keys, along with running through a checklist of toy locations, treat options, and walk times that Clarke already damn well knows.

Her last lingering kiss would be met with an eye roll and a slap on the ass to actually get herself out the door.

Sal's heavy sigh in her immediate absence would be followed by a pathetically needy sounding whine, which has Clarke just looking down into his big droopy eyes and nodding.

Cuz she gets it.

"I know, bud... 'Cept I usually make that sound when she walks into a room."

It's not surprising that her comedy is lost on the audience.

Other than that, it would be fine. Sal would know Clarke well by then, and while she is not mom, she is still very much friend shaped. So it's all good by him.

The half empty pack of hot dogs bought not-at-all as a doggie bribing tactic that Clarke keeps hidden in the back of Lexa's lunch meat drawer helps with those feelings as well.

So they'd waste the few hours going back and forth between playing catch and wiggly butting running in the back garden and watching bits and pieces of trashy television. Just a chill time between doggie and dogsitter.

Of course when Lexa comes home to a completely silent house, her first thought is,,, what the fuck happened? Because Sal always meets her at the door. Every day. Without fail. Even when she picks him up from the neighbors.

Except that day, he is nowhere to be seen.

But she keeps her cool because she trusts Clarke and there's no way something catastrophic happened in 3 hours. If there had been, Clarke absolutely would've called her. She knows this.

Which is why she's genuinely only curious as she wanders through the eerily silent house in search of her two favorite faces. Living room, empty. Hallways deserted. Kitchen, quiet as a mouse.

It's only when she loops back around from checking the backyard with the full intention of heading back out front to see if maybe they'd gone on a late afternoon walk, that she notices the display in her bedroom.

Specifically, a crashed out saint bernard taking up 3/4ths if her bed with a snoozing blonde squeezed cuddled in right behind him.

As in, if Clarke tried to roll over onto her back she'd 100% end up on the floor.

And just... What is Lexa even supposed to do with that. How is she supposed to handle that sight? How can she resist when her quiet call of, "Sal. Are you making moves on my girl, young man?" only earns her a lifted furry head and a snort of dismissal before it flops back down on her pillow.

The answer is obviously to toe her shoes off and hang her blazer on the handle, just to ease herself onto the roughly postage stamp sized bit of bed left available. The answer is obviously to gently brush the chaos of hair back from Clarke's face and press whisper soft kisses to her shoulder. To her neck. To the perfectly shaped shell of her ear, before nuzzling into the sleep warmed mess of blonde and drifting off as well.

[nyx-thedragon]

Newsies thoughts part 3

so I just finished watching Newsies 1992 for the fourth time, and noted down a bunch of things I noticed or thoughts I had. I didn't do this the third time I watched bc that one was with my brother and I wanted to focus on the movie and talking and joking with him lol.

anyway, I noted down a lot of things, so prepare for a long post. (these are in order of when I thought of them, and I'm typing them from my notes app so enjoy my train of thought/how my brain thinks)

1- shoutout to Mr Kloppman for taking care of the boys

2- what's the story behind the lady that comes in singing about her son in "Carrying the Banner"? she fucking slays, but I'm very confused about it

3- they're literally just a bunch of teenage boys who've been dealt an awful hand in life but try their best to keep everyone's morale up and stay positive (me realizing how sad the reality of the newsboys is)

4- all the older newsies taking care of and helping the little ones I love them so bad

5- you can tell how close the newsies are with each other I love it. family for real

6- why does Les carry a wooden sword almost the whole movie?

7- "this is my brother David. he's older" "oh, no kiddin'"

8- love love love how all the newsies just adopt David and Les into the group immediately

9- Pulitzer needs a magnifying glass to read the big-ass headline lmao

10- Seitz lowkey seems to kinda be on the newsies' side

11- why does the crowd boo when the old guy is holding up the "round 58" sign? (during the scene where there's a boxing match going on)

12- Les and Davey immediately follow Jack in running from Snyder even though they've never been in trouble with the law

13- Davey stops Les from putting his head in the horse mask thing (?) (when they're in Medda's theatre)

14- Jack just staring at Davey while Medda coos over Les

15- genuinely Jack did not need to pull Davey by his tie. he could've grabbed his shoulder, but no. had to pick the gayest option

16- Davey inviting Jack to his house after just meeting him literally like not even 12 hours ago. and then inviting him to stay the night?? down bad behavior for real. and he seems so nervous to introduce him to his parents too ??

17- Sarah Jacobs please give me a chance please please please

18- ngl the scenes with Jack and Sarah are a little bit like,,,cringe?? idk they just don't feel right idk if they have enough chemistry for Sarah to realistically be Jack's love interest

19- bro just casually steals a horse and no one goes after him ??? (during Santa Fe)

20- the stupid fucking calculation thing Pulitzer does with his arms omg it's so funny for no reason

21- Kid Blink either doesn't see or just doesn't care that one of the Delanceys is mocking him

22- Jack puts his hand like right next to Davey's face and then slowly moves it away lol (when Jack is asking Davey what he should say to the other newsies when first planning the strike)

23- Davey staring longingly at Jack while he's up writing "strike" on the board

24- "i need some of those...what do you call 'em?" "whatever you want!" (from a random newsie in the crowd, love whoever that was)

25- Spot Conlon hears Davey say one sentence and is like 'yeah this guy never shuts up once you get him going, i can tell' (hence "walking mouth")

26- who is the newsie that just appears behind Jack while they're in Brooklyn talking to Spot??

27- Mush and Davey friendship i love you so

28- where does Race get a harmonica from for "Seize The Day"?

29- love all the littles standing on the statue pedestal during "Seize The Day"

30- Jack and Davey jump up on the statue pedestal and start kicking each other. playing footsie, boys?

oh dear lord i did not realize i noted down this much holy shit

31- Davey immediately looking for Les when the cops show up

32- the Refuge needs better security at the gate cuz how did newsies sneak in TWICE

33- they had time to choreograph a whole dance routine bro (the little seize the day reprise thing)

34- "everyone remain calm" "let's soak 'em for Crutchie!"

35- Davey gets pulled away by someone in the crowd while trying to help Jack (during the big scene when they get ambushed by the police at the distribution place)

36- why are half of the Brooklyn guys grown ass men?? and they're intimidated enough by Spot Conlon to let him be the leader? man i love Spot Conlon he's so cool

37- Spot and Kid Blink lowkey friendship love it

38- Dutchy being horizontal for the picture

39- the workers at the restaurant just watching the chaos of "King of New York"

40- i hate Snyder's face. it makes me uncomfy

41- Sarah Jacobs, how is your hair perfect right after waking up tell me your secrets

42- if they wanted the Jack and Sarah love interest story to actually work better, they should've fit more scenes of them talking

43- nah cuz actually wdym Jack's "real" name is Francis?? he doesn't look like a Francis at all (this is just me being baffled that he could be named Francis, of all things)

44- who is letting Kid Blink hang off the fucking balcony bro he is nawt gonna land on his feet

45- Race and Blink being Medda's #1 hype men <3

oh my fucking god i'm so sorry this is so long i apologize profusely. if you've made it this far, go get a little treat for yourself

46- Jack and Davey are so grabby with each other when Davey is warning Jack about Snyder

47- Medda i love you !!! (tried to fight off the police to defend Race. "he's just a child")

48- how are the newsies losing the fight against the police? there's like a thousand of them and not as many of the police (or at least it seems there's a lot less police)

49- Denton trying to get to Jack when he's captured by the police

50- Race trying to gamble with the judge, he's so unserious

51- the look Jack gives Davey when Snyder starts telling the truth about Jack (his real name, his dad not being out West)

52- i keep accidentally mixing up Specs and Dutchy lol. probably cuz they both wear glasses (i feel so bad for this omg i'm so sorry Specs and Dutchy)

53- no yeah, security at the gate of the Refuge is awful. 6 boys snuck in at once !!

54- why did Pulitzer tell Jack to shut up and listen THREE TIMES when he wasn't even talking ???

55- Davey was just standing in the courtyard outside Pulitzer's, how did no one see him?? he wasn't even hiding, dude

56- Mush shows up to get the "Newsies Banner" papers twice - once by himself and again with Kid Blink

57- "can you read? read that" (Race making sure the kids will be able to read the paper love him for that)

58- Race and Les's little friendship moment is cute ("when the distribution bell starts ringin', will we hear it?" "nah")

59- Race's reaction to Roosevelt is funny. "Roosevelt!?" (bro is shocked)

60- Denton hanging out with Les while Davey gets his papes

61- Race cheering when Jack kisses Sarah. "Jackie boy!"

whew oh dear lord I am so so so sorry for this being so fucking long. I didn't even realize I had noted down so many things I feel bad for making folks have to read this whole thing if they want to see all my thoughts. maybe I should split this in half and have two posts instead of this long one?? idk let me know what you think. also, if I got the names wrong for any newsies, please let me know I'm still learning lol.

uh yeah, this post is over now. stay hydrated, get some rest, and stay cool

[ok555ficideas]

Neil has amnesia and forgets everything that happened after his first night in Columbia. This is another post of me sharing Neil & Aaron friendship propaganda.

“Can someone tell me, why the f*ck I’m rooming with this a$$hole?” He gestured to Andrew. 

He was met with silence. Every single person in the room looked at Andrew waiting for him to answer. 

Andrew looked bored and like he had no intention of explaining himself. 

“You two are f*cking.” Aaron said. clearly annoyed that he even had to be there. 

There were gasps all over the room and Andrew looked at his brother with a murderous expression. 

Neil laughed. He laughed so hard he almost fell to the floor. The idea of him and Andrew was so ridiculous, he didn’t even know what to say. 

After a minute he managed to calm himself down and looked at Aaron. “I don’t swing.” He said with a snort. 

“Well, apparently you do for him.”

Neil looked back at Andrew. He hated that what Aaron said made absolute sense. That it was making the puzzle that was Andrew a little bit easier to solve. He thought about the need to be close to him, the hand on the back of his neck that brought only comfort. 

He didn’t want to give Andrew the satisfaction. He looked him up and down and said with all the disgust he could master. “It was a lapse in judgment, I see.”

Andrew’s face did something Neil could not interpret, but he took a small victory in knowing that he made Andrew lose control of his expression at least a little bit. 

“I’m sorry, but it seems like you lost a f*ck buddy. You will have to find another one.” He put two of his fingers to his head in a mock salute and went into the bedroom. 

Deep down he knew it wasn’t true. Andrew wouldn’t be at his bedside that first time if that was all they were to each other, but he didn’t want to think about the alternative. 

The next week went by with a blur. Neil was struggling. He didn’t know if all of his dreams were memories or not. He didn’t know who to ask at first, but quickly decided that Aaron was his best option. 

He acted annoyed every time Niel would ask him about something and he didn’t know all the details, but answered Neil’s questions nonetheless. 

It wasn’t because he felt sorry for Neil, but because he had tons of exams and he knew that Neil would bother him until he got his answers. 

One day he seemed to have had enough and snapped his book shut. He looked at Neil and said more annoyed than usual. “ Why do you keep on asking me all of those questions? We are not friends, go bother the people who actually want to talk to you.” 

“You don’t beat around the bush. You are going to tell me what I want to know without worrying if I’ll take it well. That’s what I need. Straightforwardness, not people walking around me on eggshells.” 

Aaron didn’t ask any questions after that and acted even more annoyed. He still answered every single one of Neil's, having to be less and less persuaded. 

link to the whole fic