#work has kept me unexpectedly busy today rip

[footiehoemcfc]

Bad day means pottery date

Surpriseeee!

Hi guys :) I have not written a fic in a while because I'm always busy or I just can't get myself to do it. Howeverrr, SOMEONE, and by someone I mean Soph (@masonmount07) encouraged me to write again. She has been sharing teasers for her fics which are AMAZING and you should deff read the ones she has posted!! That being said I won't commit myself to dates or requests because I don't know how often I will be writing fics. At the moment I have different ideas I want to write but it takes time so bare with me. Anywayss I hope you enjoy it! :) TW: none, 3.9k words, Fluffy

These were the types of days you hated. Feeling like shit, feeling tired, feeling like you could be doing something better with your life. Work had been awful, you were feeling very insecure about yourself for multiple reasons, you had burnout and you were just tired of it. Projects for work kept piling up every single day and it made you want to rip your hair out. You didn’t particularly love your job, but you needed it otherwise…well you would have absolutely no money. 

Your insecurities have always haunted you, however the last couple of years you had worked through them and started accepting your body and everything about yourself because you figured you only have one body, might as well take good care of it and be happy. The problem starts when you start comparing yourself to other women. 

Last weekend Mason had invited you to go see a game of his. You were not dating, but he had asked you out on dates, 4 times by that point. On those dates he got to know you loved football, so he thought it would be great to have you there so you could enjoy the atmosphere and support him. You gladly accepted, you really liked Mason and you loved going to stadiums. You and Mason had never kissed or anything further than that. You had exchange loving glances, kisses on the cheek and held hands during dinner but not much more than that. He never really attempted to as well which made you feel like maybe he just wasn’t that into you. That kind of started your insecurities. However when you went to the game, it hit you. Why the hell would he be into you? Look at these girls in his box. They look absolutely perfect. They were basically Instagram models of course they looked perfect. You felt very out of place. 

Ever since that game you felt mehh about yourself. Mason said hi to you after the game, however you didn’t have a chance to talk to him that much since all of his friends were there and wanted to talk to him. You had been texting for a week now and had planned getting dinner tonight, but in all honestly you were not really feeling it. 

Once you stepped into your apartment, you felt relief. You were home, you could relax and you could have peace of mind. That did not last long though. Not even 5 minutes in, your boss had texted you to come in earlier tomorrow since some of the staff had quit unexpectedly today and they needed backup. That was your last straw. You stared at the message and your vision started getting blurry. Your tears started falling and they didn’t stop. You wanted a break from it and from everything. You threw your phone into the living room sofa, went upstairs and just threw yourself to bed. All the emotions you had came out. You felt dumb for crying so much over a job and over yourself, but you needed it. The crying gave you a headache which resulted in you falling asleep. 

You woke up to the sound of your phone ringing downstairs. You got up from your bed and quickly went downstairs to answer. 

Without glancing at the name you answered, “Hello?”. “Hey you! I’ve been texting you since this morning.” You froze. It was Mason. You looked at yourself in the mirror behind the sofa, your eyes puffy, your hair all over the place. “Oh yea sorry I was really busy at work today I didn’t even get a chance to check my phone.” “That’s alright love, what time should I pick you up?” Shit. The dinner. Do you lie and tell him in an hour, try to get yourself ready and look at least presentable with a stuffy nose and try and get through the whole dinner without crying, or do you just tell him the truth and cancel on him? “Oh yea um listen…” Fuck. Think. “I just had a really bad day, I feel awful doing this to you but I just don’t think I can today.” You closed your eyes hoping for the best. “Oh no, what happened?” His voice was filled with concern which made you feel butterflies in your stomach. “Nothing for you to worry about I promise, just a bunch of workload and um…” your voice cracked. You couldn’t even tell him about your shitty day without crying how were you meant to get through a whole dinner with him. “Yea it’s just a bunch of stuff” you covered your mouth and closed your eyes to stop yourself from crying. “Aw babe, are you okay? I feel awful for you.” He did feel bad for you. You had mentioned to him before how your job was not the best but he didn’t think it was this bad. “Yea” you sniffed and paused for a second to compose yourself, “yea I’m okay don’t worry” you sniffed again and just wanted to hang up because you knew if he started talking to you and try to make you feel better you would just crumble. “I’m really sorry you're having a bad day today, I wish I could help you somehow”, “It’s okay Mase don’t worry, I’m really sorry for canceling so last minute”. You did really feel bad, you were never the type of person to cancel on someone no matter what was going on but today had been just a little too much. “No love, don’t worry. We can see each other another day. Get some rest yea? If you need anything you know I’m here, always” You smiled. These types of comments he made can make  you feel so giddy, but then you remember you haven’t even kissed each other and it just goes away. “Thanks Mase. I’ll text you.” “Of course, goodnight love.” “Night Mase.” And with that you hung up. 

After that call you ordered take out, watched a movie, took a bath and went straight to bed. Your body was exhausted and you had to get in early tomorrow to cover for other people. You were not looking forward to it at all. You wanted to stay in the whole day and not do anything. 

6 am, and your alarm rang causing you to jump from your deep sleep. How did you sleep 8 hours yet you felt like you only slept 1? The thought of going to work made you nauseous. You knew this was not normal. After much thought, you decided to say fuck it and call in sick. Your brain felt like it was fried and your body felt like it was giving up on life. 

After texting your boss you were sick, you didn’t even wait for a response, you went back to bed. You had no energy to give explanations. After sleeping for 3 more hours, you woke up at 9:30 am. You wanted to relax but you also felt like you needed to at least go out for a walk and get fresh air. As tired as you were, you wanted to get some movement going. Lately looking at yourself in the mirror made you feel uneasy. You had bag under your eyes, you felt like your body felt like jelly since you have no time to work out or even take walks. You were not feeling yourself at all. Seeing all those girls in the stadium box made you look hard enough in the mirror to find more stupid insecurities you didn’t even know you had. So, to try and feel a bit productive, you took a shower, put on some yoga pants, a hoodie and decided to take a walk around the neighborhood. Did it make you feel better? Nope, but it did help a little. 

You spent the day reading, talking to your only friend in the office and cooking yourself breakfast, lunch and a snack. Your friend was concerned about you so she suggested you file a complaint to HR for the overload of work you had to do. It wasn’t a bad idea at all and you did it. The whole day Mason hadn’t texted you which felt weird. You would text him when he was free from training but no message came in. Maybe it was because you canceled on him? Maybe he finally realized he is wasting his time with you? Who knows but overthinking made you feel upset. You liked him a lot. Did he like you a lot too, as a friend? As a potential girlfriend? You didn’t know but you still wanted to find out. 

It was 5 pm and no text from him came through.  You were debating whether to bite the bullet or not and just text him yourself but you didn’t want to seem desperate. You started typing on his chat, “Hi Mase” adding a little heart. Press send you idiot, you thought to yourself. “Sent.” You put your phone down and walked away from it like it was a bomb that was going to explode. You idiot, you idiot, you thought. You decided to start cutting up some veggies to start dinner to try and distract yourself. Nerves started settling in. Maybe you should delete the text message if he hasn’t seen it.

You got a little lost in cutting up the veggies that when your phone rang it made you jump. “Jesus Christ” you muttered to yourself. The caller ID “Mase” appeared on your screen. You got nerves all over again. How can a man make you this nervous. “Hi Mase” you answered, trying not to sound terrified. “Hi love, how are you?” he sounded really chirpy which settled your nerves. “I’m better than yesterday, what about you?” “Oh great I’m glad you feel better because I’m picking you up in 30 minutes.” What? Picking you up? You don’t remember agreeing to seeing him yesterday before hanging up. “Umm what?” he laughed at your confused state. “I felt awful about not being able to help you out yesterday so I thought we could do something fun today instead of dressing up fancy and get a fancy dinner. Are you up for it?” You were smiling from ear to ear. He went out of his way to make you feel better and here you were debating or not if you were an idiot for just texting Hi to him. “Really?” you knew he could tell you were smiling and excited. “Yes really” he said chuckling. “So, wear something you don’t mind getting dirty, and I’ll be there in about 30 minutes yea?” “Okay, um but wait what are we doing exactly?” “It’s a surprise.” “A surprise?” “Yes a surprise, so get ready, don’t ask anymore questions and we’ll have fun.” You laughed at his comment. “Okay then I’ll be ready”. 

Wear something you don’t mind getting dirty. What the hell were you doing with him today? Maybe a painting class? A cooking class? Will you go to those rage rooms to break stuff? Honestly you had no idea but it was exciting. You dressed up in some old but cute jeans you didn’t mind getting dirty and a tank top with just a simple jacket. You put on a little bit of makeup and you were ready to go. Mason arrived exactly 30 minutes after to pick you up. Once he pulled up, he rolled down his window and watched you close and lock your door. “Fucking hell you still look beautiful with old clothes” he said making you blush and roll your eyes. “Listen, I still tried to look good.” You opened the door and got in his car. He leaned in and kissed your cheek, “You always look good love.” You blushed yet again at his comment. “Stop it.” You said laughing, and soon enough he started driving you to your surprise date. 

“Are you still not giving me any clues Sir?” you asked once you stopped in a red light. He turned to you, “No Ma'am, no clues, I told you it’s a surprise.” You smiled at his comment and leaned in to kiss his cheek. “Thank you Mason.” You were grateful he was doing all of this to try and make you feel better. “No problem.” You kept looking into each other’s eyes and were leaning in to kiss. You wanted to kiss him more than anything and you felt you were about to, until the car behind you honked to indicate to you the light was green. You both lightly jumped and laughed. 

Once he parked the car you were still confused. The place did not look familiar and there was no sign of what the pace could possible be. “Okay then, follow me.” He took your hand and tangled his fingers with yours, leading you to a blue door. He opened the door for you and once inside you realized were you were. “Oh my god, are we doing pottery?” he laughed at your excitement. “Yes, we are doing pottery.” “Oh my god Mason! I’ve always wanted to try and do it!” “I know you did, you told me on our first date” he said smiling at you. Your heart melted completely at the fact that he remembered. You couldn’t help it and just hugged him,  burying your face in his neck. “Thank you so much” you said, so only he could hear since your whole face was smushed in his neck from how tight you were both holding each other. “You're welcome my love.” Again, melting your heart. 

You both got seated in your places, the machine in front of you and a bucket of water beside you. Once your instructor showed you how it was done and gave you tips, both you and Mason got to work. “Okay so what if we do mugs and we keep each other’s mugs” Mason suggested. “Oooh okay that is a good idea, make it pretty please I’ll be drinking tea out of it every day.” Mason laughed at your comment and both of you started getting the clay ready. 

It got way messier than you thought it would. While trying to get the shape of the mug right, and talking to each other at the same time, Mason’s spinning machine started going way too fast causing the clay to almost fly out and causing both of you to laugh so hard your belly started to hurt. It was becoming the most fun date you have ever been to and your favorite. You loved how easy it was to have fun with him and to see him let his guard down with you. Mason on the other hand, loved seeing you happy, feeling better and making you laugh. 

Since it was the first time attempting to make a mug out of clay, they didn’t turn out great. “Look at your mug!” Mason said pointing at your deformed mug and laughing really hard causing you to laugh as well. “Oh my God you are so rude, look at YOUR mug.” His mug was worse, it was wonky and it was barely standing. Both of you red on the face from laughing so much. “We are not going to be able to drink from this, look at them.” Mason said, causing you to laugh again. You looked over at the shelves and saw different mugs, cartoons, plants and much more already made just missing color. “Okay how about, we grab one of those mugs, paint them for each other, it’s way easier.” You suggested, making Mason agree. “Yea okay, that’s a better idea.” 

Both of you grabbed two identical looking mugs, and the staff gave you different brushes and colors to paint the mugs. Both of you got concentrated in painting the mug, once you were done you didn’t even realize you had been at the place for 3 hours already. 

“Okay I’m done.” Mason said, showing you his mug. It was blue and red with spider webs. “Of course it’s a spiderman mug” you said, chuckling and rolling your eyes. “Don’t judge me, I’m a kid at heart, let me see yours.” You grabbed your mug by the handle trying not to get paint on your hand. “Tadaa '' you said, lifting up the mug. It was light blue and light green. “Oh wow, it looks really cool.” Mason said admiring it. “Well thank you, it’s for you.” Mason smiled and grabbed the mug. In exchange he gave you his mug, you laughed once you realized you were going to be drinking tea everyday out of a spiderman mug.  

Once the paint was dry, the staff packed your mugs into a box and handed it to both of you. You said your thank yous to everyone and went outside. “Okay before we go anywhere else, I had something for you so close your eyes.” You were surprised,  but obeyed and closed your eyes. You heard Mason open his car door and the close it. “Okay open up.” You opened your eyes and saw the most beautiful bouquet of roses. You gasped and looked at Mason who was already blushing and smiling at you. “Oh my God! Mase these are so beautiful! Thank you so much!” You said grabbing the roses. “You're very welcome.” Mason was still smiling at your reaction. “Mase seriously this are so pretty you didn’t have too.” You pulled him in for a hug. He wrapped his arms around your waist and buried his face into your neck. “I know, but I wanted to. I wanted you to have a great day.” You were about to tear up but you didn’t want him to see you cry. You swallowed the lump in your throat and pulled away to look at him. Both of you looked into each other's eyes and had the urge to kiss each other. You have wanted nothing more than to kiss him since the first date. He didn’t hesitate this time and kissed you lovingly. It was the best kiss you’ve ever experience in your life. This made your feelings for Mason much more stronger and hoped he felt exactly the same way for you. He brushed his tongue over your lip and kept kissing you. You didn’t want it to end but both of you had to breathe. Once you stopped kissing, you rested your forehead against his and just smiled. “This was the best date Mase.” You whispered. “I’m glad you liked it love.” He gave you one last peck and opened the door for you to get in the car. He started driving again, this time his hand on your thighs. “Where are we going now?” you asked breaking the comfortable silence. “Well, I don’t want fancy food in a fancy restaurant and I know you don’t either,” he said making you giggle, “so how about some five guys?” “Sound perfect then.”

You ordered Five Guys and started eating in the car. Mason had parked in front of a nice park with a nice view. The meal was really good, it consisted on reliving the mess both of you made with the pottery class and just talking about everything and anything.

“So,” Mason said, wiping his mouth with a napkin “I wanted to ask you what had made you so sad yesterday…I mean if you want to talk about it.” “Oh well” You were debating whether or not to tell him. How do you explain to him that you felt insecure because of all the girls he is friends with and that you hate your job without sounding pathetic. “Um my job has been a pain in the ass. I get projects every day it feels like and a lot of the staff quit unexpectedly so I have to cover for them which means even more work.” You said almost laughing at how ridiculous that sounds. No person should be dealing with the amount of work and burnout you were dealing with. “Oh shit, can’t you talk to your boss or someone like a manager?” “Yea, I mean I called in sick today because I just could not do it. I also filed a complaint to HR which I don’t really know if it will help but you know it’s at least something.” Mason was looking at you and listening attentively. “Okay good, maybe they can help, you shouldn't be feeling discouraged and tired in any job.” “Yea I know, it’s really just my job and I don’t know I’ve been feeling a little self conscious lately which is no big deal but it just throws me off some days you know?” Mason’s concern was evident in his face again. “Why’s that love?” You gulped, dreading to tell him you have felt this way ever since you went to his game. “Well, I don’t know. I just feel like sometimes I think about you and you know you are you and I am me. I feel out of place sometimes, especially last weekend with your friends and those girls. They are gorgeous and live like a different reality than me, but it's not that big of a deal I promise.” You really didn’t want to make it seem you were fishing for compliments or you wanted pitty from him but you didn’t want to lie to him.

“Hey look at me.” He said placing one hand against your cheek for you to look at him. “You can talk to me about this okay? I never want you to feel out of place, specially with me. You are the most gorgeous girl. I’ve really wanted to be with you ever since I met you. I know sometimes my lifestyle is very different from yours but that doesn’t mean I don’t want you. Since our first date I've been beating myself up for not even attempting to kiss you.” He said chuckling and making you smile. “I just really wanted to do this the right way you know? Like go on dates, get to know you first, not rush it. That being said, I’ve been really dying to kiss you though, and I’m glad I finally did.” You smiled at him and leaned in to kiss him one more time. It was not a heated kiss, it had a lot of passion. “I really like you Mase, I also want to do this the right way. Sometimes I just overthink too much and get like awkward I don’t know.” You said making yourself and him giggle. “I like you too. So much. You don’t need to hide your personality from me, you don’t need to always look “perfect” for me. I loved seeing you smiling, laughing, clay all over your face today.” You both laughed remembering how the clay went all over the place. He leaned in again and kissed you one more time. “Thank you for today, really. I've never had anyone go out of their way to do something like this for me.” You said kissing his cheek. “You're welcome. We are doing this again it was way too much fun.” He kissed your nose and you agreed. 

Once you threw the food wrappers in a trash can near by, he drove off to go drop you off. While saying goodbye, he gave you a few more kisses and waited for you to get safely into your apartment. Once you got inside, you couldn't help but feel giddy and giggle to yourself. You heard a ping from your phone. “Cooking classes next date? X” You smiled to yourself as you read Mason’s message. “Perfect.” You replied. The butterflies in your tummy never went away that night.

[kae-karo]

for the writing meta ask thing: 2, 7, 12, 17, 22!

aaaaaaa hello dear thank u so much???? 🥺💜 (meta writing asks - x) also i really respect ur appreciation of the numbers 2 and 7 best believe those were my fave numbers when i was younger lmao

2. Tell us about what you’re most looking forward to writing – in your current project, or a future project

sksdfjkljdsfjlkdsfk oh gods okay okay so i’m technically between projects right now (i bashed out a bunch of one-shots that need some editing before i post them) but i’m sort of clinging and indecisive between two big projects that i want to work on. neither really has much direction yet, and one already has a, uh, hint, in the form of a one-shot that already exists out on ao3.

but the other, which i’ve given a little more thought, would be a demon!kaeya witch!diluc au, and i get to write some babie kaeluc which like. idk what it is about writing chars as kids, it feels a little more freeing and is always a refreshing sort of style? anyway, the first set of scenes take place when they’re kids, and the rest as adults, and i mean demon!kaeya speaks for itself tbh as does witch!diluc. it’s been a while since i really wrote a dedicated like...magic au? or, like, one that deals with magic the way i plan to do.

i’ve also been like. vaguely at the corners of my mind considering an urban fantasy fae!kaeya au but that’s like. the most vague concept right now - still excited about it nonetheless.

oh and another project idea that i don’t need to think abt right now bc i have too many, a chiluc memory loss au, specifically relating to that one post (x) i rb’d the other day :) still my standard enemies to lovers and all but with a little bit of spice lmao

7. What do you think are the characteristics of your personal writing style? Would others agree?

oh i really hope ppl agree with this one at least: that i really put people into the pov character’s shoes. that’s like. the thing i strive for the most? to really put readers into the char’s perspectives and elicit the same emotions the character’s feeling, etc?

beyond that, from a more technical perspective, i write in present tense, i’m allergic to epithets, i try quite hard to avoid too many passive/stationary verbs, grammar whomst idk her, i do subscribe to the ‘show not tell’ practice as much as it makes sense to, i’m big on internal monologues and internal conflict and a slut for the ‘there was only one bed’ trope (and tbh tropes in general). i think i’ve only ever written 3 fics that didn’t have happy endings (out of like...130+) but i’m not afraid to write some angst (i’m sure all my dabihawks followers are laughing at me rn lmao)

12. Do you want your writing to be famous?

u know once upon a time i was gonna publish some (edited, obviously) fics as like actual books and like that’s not off the table per se, nor am i really opposed to fics themselves gaining popularity? but like i really don’t care either way, like i’m not writing so that they will be popular or anything like that. or like. desperately hoping they will be or anything. i’m glad that ppl like it and comments mean the entire world to me, like i am so happy that other ppl enjoy my words as much as i do? but i’m not chasing fame or anything

17. Do you think readers perceive your work - or you - differently to you? What do you think would surprise your readers about your writing or your motivations?

sdfljkdsfjklfdsjlk this is such an interesting question, and i think the shortest answer is yes i think everyone perceives my writing differently than i do? and i’ve had a few comments that prove it, but usually not in any like. drastic kind of way. as for how i’m perceived, i frankly have no idea slkfjksldfj so i can’t really say?

hm things that would surprise my writers...i really don’t know, honestly? i think a lot of ppl assume that i’m posting as i write (since that’s p common) though i do make a point of saying pretty often that, with like maybe one or two exceptions in my fic career, i won’t post a fic until it’s finished lmao. as for motivations, i mean. most of the time my motivation is just ‘i have brainrot for this scene/idea specifically and if i do not write it i will simply perish’ lmaoooo

22. Do you reread your old works? How do you feel about them?

u know this is such an interesting question, because usually i don’t reread them? i’ll deadass half forget i’ve written a fic with a certain premise or half the events in any given fic if i didn’t write it within the past like couple months. i think almost anything i’ve written within the past year is close enough to my current writing style tho that if i read snippets of it, i’m like ‘yep that still sounds good to me!’

not that i ever really dislike my older writing? i think it’s just a matter of going ‘well if i was writing this scene today, i’d do it differently’. i think for me a lot of writing is about getting a story out of my head and into the world? so i don’t often feel the need or desire to go back to old fics or old writing too often lmao

[send me a meta writing ask!!]

[rafaelblackbird15]

Teen Wolf Fic Recs Part 4: Sterek

These are Sterek, Stiles Stilinski/Derek Hale fanfictions.

I really love these. They are some of my favourite Sterek stories, and ALL of these are absolutely beautiful. Without a doubt. Send the authors some love, because that's what they've given me and us right here. :)

If there is a problem with any of the links, let me know and I will fix them.

For appropriate reading check the hashtags on the actual fics.

I hope you enjoy these as much as I did.

And check out my other Steter fic recs [Part 1] and [Part 2] and Sterek fic recs [Part 3]

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God Brings The Wounded by CallieB on Archive of Our Own

Words: 4938

Chapters: 1/1

Summary:

“Jesus,” Stiles says, when he sees Derek for the first time, and feels his face do that thing where it tries to smile. Derek, or the weirdly fresh-faced teenage version of Derek that he is now, doesn’t flinch at Stiles’ exclamation.

He’s too busy flinching at everything else.

 

Requested by the lovely nohomohomie, who asked for something angsty post-nogitsune.

Has got to be one of my favourite canon teenage/de-aged Derek fics, with beautiful, angsty Sterek, of course.

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You're Not You by CallieB on Archive of Our Own

Words: 5266

Chapters: 1/1

Part 9 of the Sterek Bingo 2017 series

Summary:

Stiles lifts his head slowly, meeting Derek’s gaze. His eyes… they’re always clever, bright, perceptive, but today there’s something in them that Derek doesn’t recognise. He’s pale, but not defeated. He looks stronger than Derek expected. And unexpectedly, he feels it flash through him in a bolt of absolute, though surprised, certainty.

That's not Stiles.

 

Written for the Dark!Stiles square on my Sterek Bingo card.

This story is possibly one of the best EVER Void!Stiles stories I have ever read. The idea is complex and fascinating and unique. After I read this for the first time I was left stunned and I kept coming back to it in my mind as well as to read because I couldn't get over the idea. It's beautiful.

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Yeah, Pass The Salt, Stiles by CallieB on Archive of Our Own

Words: 3609

Chapters: 1/1

Summary:

Yeah, pass the salt, Stiles.

They're not particularly inspiring words. Not like the long stream of goo spilling over Scotty's arm. But somewhere, Stiles' soulmate is out there, waiting to say them to him.

If only he could stop thinking about the mysterious hot stranger he met in the woods...

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Author: CallieB

This author has 15 Teen Wolf works, most if not all are Sterek. Some of them in particular really hit somewhere special.

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Behind Locked Doors by isthatbloodonhisshirt (wasterella) on Archive of Our Own

Words: 11128

Chapters: 1/1

Summary:

Derek often showed up in his room—at least he used the fucking door now that he knew where the spare key was hidden—and he couldn’t escape people in general in the Jeep since they could see him through the window. His dad was home, and when he wasn’t, there was always the risk of other people showing up.

His bathroom, on the other hand? No, his bathroom was a small room with no window in the middle of the house with a lockable door and no judgement. He could sit in the bathroom for hours, and no one would question it. Was he watching porn on his phone and jerking off? Was he taking a massive dump? Did he have constipation? Was he stitching up the millionth injury of the month in private? Who knew? No one but Stiles!

The locked door at his back felt like a safety net for him sometimes. In the bathroom, he didn’t have to pretend. He didn’t have to smile and wave people’s words off, insist he was fine, laugh and act like everything was okay. In the bathroom, he was allowed to sit on the floor, his expression tight, and his body falling apart on him.

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Author: isthatbloodonhisshirt (wasterella)

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Should Have Looked on Craigslist by Akiruchan on Archive of Our Own

Words: 27217

Chapters: 1/1

Summary:

Derek is rash and self-sacrificing, everything that will one day get him killed. Stiles doesn't want that. He's become too accustomed to a life with Derek Hale in it. To live without, well, it just doesn't seem to be an option.

or...

The five times Stiles' expectations fall short, and the one time he's glad they do.

This is an incredible, slow burn, build of the winding relationship between Stiles and Derek and the world they now live in, side by side. It's wonderful and blessedly long.

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Bless You by Ankiruchan on Archive of Our Own

Words: 3070

Chapters: 1/1

Summary:

It all started with a sneeze...

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Lend Me Your Eyes, Give Me Your Heart by Ankiruchan on Archive of Our Own

Words: 3057

Chapters: 1/1

Summary:

Stiles’ life sucks. He’s honest enough with himself to admit to at least that. More often than not he spends his free time running for his life, saving people from creatures who want to rip his face off, and all around having a distinct lack of self-preservation. It sort of comes with the territory. Not something he can avoid when his circle of friends happen to be werewolves.

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Nobody's Fault But Mine by Akiruchan on Archive of Our Own

Words: 26552

Chapters: 4/?

Summary:

Stiles has always been good at ignoring his problems. Preferring to wait them out until they are nothing but a distant memory. But when a midnight stroll leads to a nasty scratch to Stiles side, courtesy of Derek, Stiles finds that some things just can't be ignored, not that he doesn't try. Better hearing and improved eyesight, that is something he can ignore for now. The sudden urge to touch and smell Derek all the time? Not so much.

This is werewolf!Stiles, and it's one the of the laid back, kind, intense versions that I enjoy very much. Unfortunately, I think it's been discontinued, but I believe even so, these 4 chapters are worth the little heartbreak that comes with the knowledge it may not be finished.

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Author: Akiruchan

This author is responsible for some of the best slow build Sterek stories I've read.

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Lock All The Doors Behind You by entanglednow on Archive of Our Own

Words: 25960

Chapters: 1/1

Summary:

He has no idea what you're supposed to say when you find one of your...werewolf acquaintances, completely out of their mind, growling like they're about to see what your insides taste like. There's no handbook for this. Stiles is thinking that if he survives he might write one.

I've come back to this so many times. The relationship is so vulnerable, down to earth and open and kind, extremely kind, which is something Derek really lacks in his life, someone to be kind to him. There's a feeling, somehow, that this is quite natural for them.

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In Case Of Emergency by entanglednow on Archive of Our Own

Words: 1826

Chapters: 1/1

Summary:

Derek falls through Stiles's bedroom window at ten past midnight.

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By Any Other Name by entanglednow on Archive of Our Own

Words: 33090

Chapters: 1/1

Summary:

He doesn't know his name, he doesn't know who he is, and neither does the werewolf he's on the run with. But he's pretty sure they hunt monsters, because they seem to be really good at it.

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I Could Find My Way Back by entanglednow on Archive of Our Own

Words: 6250

Chapters: 1/1

Summary:

What's the worst that could happen?

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Author: entanglednow

This author is responsible for so many amazing fics out there. They have 55 Teen Wolf fics, all with really interesting ideas and takes on the characters and supernatural world.

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You want forgiveness (I'll give that to you) by dearericbittle (dutchmoxie) on Archive of Our Own

Words: 2806

Chapters: 1/1

Summary:

Derek is running from the Alpha, suffering from wolfsbane poisoning and he’s clearly losing it. Why else would he be seeing his mother - and everyone else he might as well have killed himself. But Stiles can’t just let him get what he deserves. Stiles never leaves him behind, even when he should.

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(Fuck you they said) As they threw their threads from their wedding bed by dearericbittle (dutchmoxie) on Archive of Our Own

Words: 96199

Chapters: 9/9

Summary:

First Son Stiles Stilinski just accidentally caused an international incident. And apparently the only way to save human-werewolf relations is to marry him off to Prince Derek of Triskele. Stiles is going to need all of his acting skills to make the marriage look real, because the Prince is kind of a fucking asshole.

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Author: dearericbittle (dutchmoxie)

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fake empire by Poe on Archive of Our Own

Words: 3685

Chapters: 1/1

Summary:

Stiles hadn’t meant for any of this to happen. He was going to tell Derek. The whole truth of it. He was halfway through when the phone rang. A half-finished sentence, left hanging in the air as his life crumbled around him.

*

(or: Stiles gets so, so lost. But he finds himself again.)

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you all over me by Poe on Archive of Our Own

Words: 3705

Chapters: 1/1

Summary:

The thing about Stiles is, Derek thinks, is that he has no idea how enthralling he truly is. He’s easy to overlook, right up until the point he isn’t, and at some stage, Derek started looking, and now, it’s all he can do.

(or: the one where the pack is happy, healthy and alive, and Stiles and Derek are sort of inevitable)

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Author: Poe

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For If Dreams Die by veritas_st on Archive of Our Own

Words: 24169

Chapters: 8/8

Summary:

“I had a dream about a boy last night,” Mischief says through a mouthful of pancakes. His dad points the spatula at him and he swallows before he says anything else. “His name was Derek. He called me Stiles. I want to be called that from now on.”

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Author: veritas_st

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About Today by rufflefeather on Archive of Our Own

Words: 8901

Chapters: 1/1

Part 1 of the inside these arms series

Summary:

Stiles is having the worst day of his life and it keeps happening.

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Until Tomorrow by rufflefeather on Archive of Our Own

Words: 9016

Chapters: 1/1

Part 2 of the inside these arms series

Summary:

Derek's worst nightmares didn't prepare him for this.

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Let it be me by rufflefeather on Archive of Our Own

Words: 1495

Chapters: 1/1

Summary:

After everything that happened, Stiles goes to see Derek.

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Even the stars they burn by rufflefeather on Archive of Our Own

Words: 5770

Chapters: 1/1

Summary:

Derek finds out quite by accident what makes Stiles shut up. If he reveals along the way that he didn't always carry this darkness around, then that's entirely Stiles' fault.

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Solstice. by rufflefeather on Archive of Our Own

Words: 4119

Chapters: 1/1

Summary:

It's the first total lunar eclipse during winter solstice in three hundred and fifty years and Derek has no idea what's going to happen.

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Author: rufflefeather

This author has some intense, sometimes heartbreakingly endearing, and wonderful Teen Wolf fics.

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Hear The Wheels As They Roll by crossroadswrite on Archive of Our Own

Words: 44919

Chapters: 2/2

Summary:

“You can’t be here. This is private property,” someone calls out and for some reason that voice sounds painfully familiar.

When it hits him why, Stiles almost chokes with the realization, “Derek Hale,” he says, unbelievably happy because he remembers Derek when they were young.

Derek looks grumpier, sadder, angrier. Stiles can’t really fault him for that. He also looks surprised that Stiles knows who he is. He squint/glares suspiciously at him, his nostrils flare for a second before he widens his eyes almost dramatically.

“Stiles,” he says quietly, like he can’t really believe it.

Stiles beams, “Yeah, you remember me!”

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Author: crossroadswrite

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[thosewickedlovelies]

An Ode To Marcus Moreno’s Arms

Pairing: Marcus Moreno x GN!Reader

Rating: Mature

Summary: You’re a training specialist in swordsmanship at Heroics Headquarters, so you see a lot of Marcus Moreno.

Tags: Reader has a vivid (sexual) imagination, but there’s only a few brief sections.

Word Count: 2,272

A/N: This started out as an ode to his arms, but his arms are connected to the rest of him, so. Alternative title: In Appreciation of Marcus Moreno

My assumption/headcanon of his powers are telekinesis, plus general exceptional physical prowess and weapons skills? Idk, we weren’t given much, but those feel like solid abilities for someone implied to be the super among super heroes. Idk what this is but I regret nothing.

More content/worldbuilding set in this universe 💗

--

Marcus Moreno’s arms were capable of many things.

You knew this because you saw them on an almost-daily basis. You were one of the training specialists at Heroics Headquarters, one of a large, ever-expanding staff of instructors who were experts in their respective fields of combat or weapons. Your job, essentially, was to be a superhero minus the powers- and use your abilities to keep the Heroics in top form.

Your expertise was swordsmanship, which meant you spent more time with Marcus than any of the other heroes. All of the physical trainers and specialists sparred with the Heroics in mock villain showdowns, but you also helped them hone specific skills. You were here because your skillset and abilities matched Marcus’s.

So you’ve had plenty of opportunity to behold his arms at work.

One would think that they’d be most enticing mid-action, but it was a cosmically ironic fact that there was never really a wrong moment to ogle. How that man could make merely unsheathing his swords so erotic was beyond you.

But by now you’d seen it from every angle. You were as familiar with Marcus’s technique as you were with your own, and knew well the cycle of muscle contractions which rippled up his whole body. It started with his legs: setting his stance, primed and poised on the balls of his feet. Then every muscle in his torso, his clinging t-shirts sliding over taut flesh as they rode up with the lifting of his arms- his arms. Biceps suddenly incredibly present and visibly straining past barely-existent sleeves, tendons flexing rigid and obvious, a tangle of pathways you wanted to map with your tongue.

This show was best when he had started his day with tactical theory sessions, because then his expressive face got involved. Oh yes, it wasn’t enough for him just to be built the way he was, his face had to go and be attractive as well.

Tedious strategy debates with Miracle Guy during these sessions never failed to get under his skin- you could always tell how much steam Marcus had to let off based on the clench of his jaw. Or the way he’d drag his bottom lip over his teeth, nostrils flaring in an almost-snarl. When that happened you knew he gripped the hilts of his swords a little tighter, because you’d see the ridges in his wrist dip and pull like piano strings perpendicular to the line of his gloves. The blades would sing little sharper on those days, his arms freeing them in a jerk rather than their usual smooth, deliberate slide.

It was amazing you ever made it beyond unsheathing your weapons.

But oh, were you glad you did, because watching Marcus Moreno fight was truly a treat. The control he had over his body was remarkable; even when his limbs flung and stretched, they were to ready to contract again at a second’s notice. “Fight” was really too limited of a term for it- Marcus manipulated his body in an incredible harmony of mind and muscle, using his weapons- including his telekinesis- as extensions of himself.

You wondered sometimes how fine his control over his telekinesis was- if he could use it on himself. If he did use it somehow to give his blows that devastating extra speed and strength.

It was easy to understand, after witnessing him, why battle is often described as a dance.

On particularly ruthless training days, his tan skin would gleam with sweat. It would bead and trickle along the pulsing veins in his arms, drawing your attention even more, and salacious scenes would flash behind your eyelids: those same glistening forearms visible in your peripherals as they box you against a wall, that same intent glitter in his dark eyes as they come closer and closer, breathless, his chest heaving into yours-

You never let on to any of this though. You were a master of the blade, and had trained too thoroughly to let the appearance of an opponent get to you. Besides that fact, you would never do anything to risk your place with the Heroics. Although you were an authority figure, they were still superheroes, and thus unlike anyone else you’d worked with- it made for a challenging, stimulating dynamic in which you were constantly both instructor and student.

Even outside of the training arena, Marcus’s arms were a sight.

Holding data pads or writing utensils as he led the Heroics in discussions of group tactics, deftly manipulating characters onscreen or scribbling things on a whiteboard. Sometimes he would go to these sessions straight from physical training, and the cooling sweat on his skin would raise goosebumps all along the smooth flesh.

You observed how gently his arms could move in yet other circumstances.

Training specialists often joined in when the Heroics were given new gadgets to play with. And although these days tended to be slower, they still made you sweat. Watching the caution with which Marcus handled the gear at first, the slow care he reserved for things with which he was still becoming familiar. The precision and that control he always kept- even when his frustration slipped out in the form of snarky remarks, he was always conscious of his movements. As he gained confidence, the surety would return to his motions, his shoulders squaring in quiet triumph- his broad, broad shoulders, which you had imagined far too many times propping up your thighs while his hands and mouth were otherwise engaged between them.

You wondered if Marcus would treat your body like something new he had to master. If his hands would probe and caress with the same thoroughness. If the same wicked delight would steal over his features as he learned how best to coax you toward his desired goals; if his fascinated smirk would change after the thousandth time he had taken you apart.

It didn’t help that these sessions highlighted that he was a kind, competent teacher. His teammates exasperated him sometimes, but Marcus was the first to step in when one of them was struggling. A light touch to rearrange their stance, an encouraging word or smile. If you hadn’t personally felt the power thrumming under his skin, you would have never guessed that such a soft man was capable of his immense abilities.

Occasionally you had to remind yourself not to get all dopey-eyed when he was instructing the kids. If you thought he was patient with the adult Heroics, it was nothing compared to how he interacted with their younger counterparts. Equally firm and joking in turn, he taught them every trick he knew while desperately hoping they would never have to use the knowledge.

Some days were easier for him than others- the times they practiced with weapons could have unexpectedly diverting consequences. Marcus let Guppy hold his katanas, once- she was fully capable with her shark strength, but the vision of the diminutive girl brandishing swords that were taller than she was, her face aglow with a ferocious grin, had all the others in fits.

You swore he was suppressing laughter himself as he carefully took them away from her. His hands, already distracting enough, looked comically vast compared to hers as he delicately maneuvered them to pluck the swords from her grasp. Something about the sight of his thick fingers, resettling themselves around the hilts with reflexive ease, made your mouth dry.

His fingers squeezed other things, too, and it made flames leap low in your belly every time.

Lime wedges, on the rare occasions he indulged in drinks stronger than wine at the Headquarters bar. His friends’s shoulders, in affection and farewell, after relaxing with them at said bar following hard days. You longed to be one of those who Marcus slung an arm around in jest, a laugh shaking his shoulders and sparkling in his eyes. Would his skin be as warm as it was while swinging a weapon? What would his body feel like softened in mirth, instead of vibrating with focus?

You didn’t blame him for his more formal attitude during work hours. His days were busy, and you rarely saw him off the training mats. You had shared a few evenings with him on nights when the bar was quieter, though. He was perfectly friendly, treating you just like anyone else he was getting to know.

Tonight was one of those quieter nights, but you didn’t do more than cast a quick glance at the small group sitting in the corner before slumping to the bar. You were worn out today, and just wanted something strong and solitary before going home.

You sighed into the numbing wash of your drink, your eyes drifting shut. Nobody would bother you this evening; it wasn’t that kind of atmosphere.

Except- the barstool next to yours scraped against the floor.

You inhaled deeply, preparing to politely rip into whatever idiot was assuming you needed company- only to have the words struck off your lips by the apprehensive brown eyes of Marcus Moreno.

“Hey,” he said, clearing his throat. “I’m sorry to bother you. You can tell me to march right back to my table if you like, but uh, I just wanted to see if you were all right. After today.”

You could see that he genuinely meant it- he was perched only partially on the barstool, ready to take off again if you said the word. But his gaze was curious, concerned.

You brow furrowed. “After today?” you echoed, too caught off-guard to think of anything else. What could he mean? Nothing special had happened today. He’d disarmed you, sure, but it wasn’t the first time that had occurred in the eight months you’d been working with him.

Marcus shifted uncertainly. “You just seemed...tired. Reflexes slower than usual,” he noted wryly. “And, well. We have matching bags.” He pointed to his face, where dark shadows were visible beneath his eyes. He offered a self-deprecating, tentative smile, conscious that he was treading in new territory.

It takes you a minute to process. In all the time you’ve spent observing his fighting techniques to perfection, you’d never considered that he could have been using those same opportunities to observe you. It provokes a funny feeling in your chest, twisting your breath up in your lungs like tangled ribbon.

“Oh,” you murmur, surprised but unoffended by his mention of the bags under your eyes. “Well...I am tired today, I guess.” You took a sip of your drink, gauging his interest, hesitating before continuing. “My sister broke her hip, so she just moved in with me for while she heals. It’s been...a stressful transition,” you admitted.

He angles himself toward you, attention fully committed and eyes widening in sympathy. “Oh gosh, that’s terrible. Do you need some time off? I can clear it with the boss for you, work with Santino for however long you need.” He seemed to straighten up, as if ready to spring away and take care of it the moment you answered.

“No, please,” you chuckled in appreciation of his earnestness. “I might need a few shorter days, but neither of us need me fussing over her 24/7.” Both you and your sister were strongly independent. It meant that you had often been at odds when you were younger, but you were all each other had now, and had made efforts to improve your relationship.

Marcus nodded in understanding, settling again. He seemed at a loss for if he should leave or say something else, so you made the choice for him.

“Tired of getting your ass kicked in my lessons, Moreno? You know Santino doesn’t work you as hard.” Your fellow swordsmanship instructor was slightly younger, a newer hire who was still a little bit in awe of the Heroics.

You didn’t usually speak so flippantly to him, but his eyebrows arced high at the challenge, a smile tugging on his lips. “Sounds like somebody needs a reminder of who kicked whose ass today, ma’am.” Rolling right along with your apparent newfound playfulness.

You pinpointed, suddenly, what was different about him tonight, why this interaction felt different compared to your others. There’d always been an air of deference about him before, as if even outside of the arena he considered you a superior. But tonight he was just treating you like a peer, a regular person. Maybe it had taken your excessively dragging day for him to come to terms with the fact that you were a regular person, but the ice finally felt like it had broken between you and you just...talked, after that. For longer than both of you probably intended.

“Shoot, I have to go get Missy,” Marcus realized, catching sight of his watch. “But you- you’ll be here again? I mean, I see you here a lot.” He stumbled over his words.

Did he? It was true that you were often at the bar at the same time, but for him to acknowledge that meant that he actually noticed you. Remembered your presence.

“Yeah, I’m here pretty regularly,” you confirmed, cautiously hopeful.

“Good. I mean, I’ll see you, then- next time.” His voice rasped low, but there was a nervousness in his expression. He twisted his jacket between his large hands.

He wanted to see you again. “Yes.” You smiled at him, surprise and pleasure shining through. “I’ll see you next time,” you said with conviction.

His eyes crinkled in answer, and your breath caught. Your ordered yourself not to watch him leave the room.

You drove home with a quiet grin on your face.

[percywinchester27]

A lot like ‘Us’ (Part-40)

Word count: 4.8K

Pairing: Sam X Reader AU

Warnings: Fluff, angst, feels, sickness

Series Summary: Y/N Y/L/N is eager and honestly, still in awe that she managed to get herself an acceptance from Stanford Law School. On the face of it, her life seems as put together, mysterious and independent as one might hope for. On the insides, she carries the burden of past that haunts her till date. Seemingly, she’d left it all behind; that is until she sets foot in the class of the Law School’s youngest, most promising professor.

A/N: The story employs two different timelines. The present timeline for the story takes place in 2014. Please let me know what you guys think :)

Beta: @deanssweetheart23​​. You’re a Rockstar <3

A lot like ‘Us’ masterlist

No one talked to you today, the whispers though, had escalated. No one was bothering to keep it quiet either. Not just your classmates, even the faculty kept giving you looks, ranging from distrust to pity. Professor Whitman, who never cared much about anything, took a whole minute to find you in the class and give you a once over, like he was seeing you for the first time- Sam Winchester’s flighty wife, back to ruin his life again.

The judgement you could take. The pity was painful. What did they see? A girl who couldn’t appreciate a good man? Or as much as you hated to think of it that way- a girl who couldn't be a mother again.

It came as a surprise when Jody called you to her office after the class. When you followed her in, she closed the door behind and unexpectedly pulled you into a hug.

“I’m sorry about all of this, Y/N,” she said. “It’s awful.”

You waited for her to let go of you then asked, “How much trouble is Sam in?”

Jody pursed her lips. “I want to say, ‘not much’ but we’ll only know on Monday, I suppose.”

“Are you part of the enquiry committee?”

She nodded. “All of the freshman faculty panel is on there. You have nothing to worry about, Y/N. Your grades are impeccable. You can’t possibly be sleeping with all of us.”

“I’m not even sleeping with Sam!” You let out, frustrated. “And I’m more worried about what happens to him.” You were a student. The most they could do is sack you from the students committee and bump down your grades. 

Jody regarded you for a moment. “The two of you are so similar. It’s uncanny.”

She sighed. “I’ll be upfront with you, Y/N. As much as I’ve tried to shake them, Sam’s priorities are set. Even absent, you were very high up on that list. With you in front of him, there are very few things Sam wouldn’t give up for you.”

You already knew that. But was it right to let him make all those sacrifices for someone as undeserving as you?

The thought plagued you after you’d left Jody’s office, just as it had plagued you for the past two days. Outside, you ran into Madison.

“Oh, I was looking for you,” she said. “Sorry, I missed the first few lectures, but I have news for you. One good, one bad.”

“Bad one first,” you said, apprehensive. 

Madison made a face. “Starting the day after tomorrow, I have no place to live.”

“What? Didn’t you have a lease for the whole year?”

“Lacey is screwing someone, who knows someone else who knows the hostel director. And, well, long story short, my lease got prematurely terminated.”

Anger flared inside you again. This was happening to Madison only because she was staunchly standing with you. 

“I want you to come house hunting with me. My brother’s agreed to help me out with the money. So, I’m good to go.”

The idea popped up in your head immediately. “Why don’t you move in with me?” 

Her eyebrows knitted together. “Meg?”

“Meg’s almost moved out next door. I was supposed to put out an add for a roommate but with everything that’s going on…” Convincing Meg to continue with the move had been very difficult. She thought it was some sort of betrayal to leave you by yourself in all this mess. Cas supported her on that. However, everyone was camping in your living room anyway. 

Ultimately, you had to put your foot down and tell her to move her ass out. Your life might always remain a tragedy. It shouldn’t pause her or Cas’s life. She had still slept on your sofa last night.

“You’re serious?” Madison was trying her best to contain her excitement.

“As a heart attack.”

She let out a loud squeal and tackled you. “This is the best thing ever. We’ll be roomies!”

“Not if you call me that.”

Madison’s laughter rang out in your ears. “Now you’ve already offered. You can’t take it back, roomie.”

“Wait, what’s the good news?” 

Her face split into a huge grin. “I heard from the HR at Acton Gris. They won’t hire me as an intern. But she asked me to apply for the position of summer associate next year. She said my chances looked great.”

“That’s wonderful!”

“Yes! I’m thinking of applying for an on campus job this year.”

Madison was sincere, smart and she worked very hard. No wonder good things were in store for her. “Let me talk to Molly today. See if she has some inside intel on vacancies.”

“You’d do that?” Madison couldn’t stop beaming and you smiled right along with her. “The world is a much better place with you in it.”

Not everyone thought that. Following the pattern of the past few days, Rebecca decided to show her face again after the lecture. You had been expecting her at this point. Maybe she couldn’t sleep without venting off her frustration on you. As usual, she had Lacey next to her, who really had gone fully darkside.

“Missing your Professor?”

You saw Madison start, but Rebecca put in. “Oh, stop being her Lapdog, Maxwell. You don’t have to rollover each time she blows a whistle.”

“It’s alright, Maddie,” you said in a calm voice. “As it happens, I do miss him very much.”

“I hope at least the sex was worth it,” said Lacey.

You grinned at her. “Mind-blowing, actually. I remember this one time, I was screaming his name for literal hours. God, the things that man can do. It’s in-credi-ble.” You drew out the last word with a relish.

Lacey’s jaw dropped.

Rebecca recovered quickly. “Christ! You’re shameless. That man’s married with a son. Have you got no shame at all?”

“Weren’t you the one making out with Sam at Maddie’s birthday party in the bar restroom?” You shot back. “I remember you described the bit about feeling his abs in extreme details. He wore his wedding ring around his neck. So how are you not shameless?”

Rebecca’s face reddened in an instant. “What… how…?”

“Doesn’t feel so good when the finger is pointed at you. Right, Rebecca? When you’re the one being put on a spot and your character is being brought into question. It was okay for you to make out with a professor. Why are the rules so different for me?”

“I- I was drunk that night. And I never slept with him!”

“Don’t you dare paint him in that light. As if you were some drunk woman he took advantage of in a toilet cubicle.” You spat. “You’re so desperate that you don’t think twice about lying over something so demeaning. You didn’t touch Sam because at 2 in the night, he wasn’t even there in that bar. So shut that bullshit.”

There was a crowd gathered around you now, and she didn’t like her words coming back to bite her.

“How do you know where Sam was that night?” Rebecca questioned, clearly baffled and out of her element, but trying to salvage the situation and save face.

You rolled your eyes. “We’re having an affair, remember? Keep up, Rebecca. You filed that complaint. Also, don’t worry about his wife, really. She totally doesn’t mind.” You winked.

The murmur around you was starting to intensify. You didn’t know how long it would be before the actual story came out. Or if it ever would come out. Neither did you care. You didn’t owe an explanation to any of these people. 

Rebecca breathed out harshly, and spoke through her teeth, contempt dripping in each word. “You’re disgusting. That child of his-”

“Don’t. Don’t utter a word about that boy,” you hissed, the anger finally burning through. “You’ve done enough harm to Sam’s reputation. But I swear to God, Rebecca, you’ll live to regret it if you so much as dare to think about Max, you deplorable excuse of a living thing.”

The warning was so raw, she flinched back from you as you stormed out. 

Madison did not follow you to the library. She knew when you wanted to be left alone. Attacking Sam was one thing, but you really did want to rip Rebecca’s throat for wanting to bring Max in the middle of it. The fierce protectiveness you felt for him was like nothing else you had experienced before. 

Throughout the following hour, you kept glancing at the door of the library, expecting Max to walk in. Sam had said he would visit. 

Maybe you would ask him to read out to you today. If anything, that could fix your mood.

“Umm… Y/N?”

You looked up to see Molly standing over you. 

“Hey. I didn’t see you there.”

She shuffled from one foot to the other looking at you awkwardly.

You squared your shoulders, realising what she might’ve heard. “Anything you want?”

“I- I wanted to say sorry.”

That brought you up short. “Why?”

Molly ran her fingers through her red hair. “I didn’t know you were… you know… Sam’s wife, and I said horrible stuff to you the other day.”

It hadn’t actually been that horrible. 

“I’d heard the rumours but I swear I didn’t believe a word. Then I ran into Chase Lincoln yesterday. He told me.”

“Everything?”

Molly nodded sadly. “It was wrong of me to make assumptions, Y/N. What happened in Sam’s life was none of my business. And for the reason you left to be so horrifying? I could have never imagined. I’m really, really sorry. I don’t know how to apologize.”

“Stop saying sorry,” you said at once. “I know you’ve always meant well for Sam and for me, Molly. Everyone likes to gossip. It’s no big deal. You didn’t hurt or offend me.”

“There must be something I can do, novia.”

“Never bring it up again. Please. Let’s just forget that conversation happened.”

You saw her eyes start to fill up. “Take the rest of the week off, yeah? Come back Monday.”

“You’re low on staff already.” You did not want anyone’s sympathy.

“I’m not doing this for you,” she said. “Spend the weekend with Sam. He’ll need a distraction more than ever before that hearing on Monday. Okay?”

“Okay.”

Molly disappeared into the librarian’s room before the waterworks started. She didn’t want you to see her tear up so you didn’t follow her in, continuing with your sideways glances at the door. The sharp ring of your phone made you jump.

“Hello?” You answered the unknown number

“Y/N? It’s Alex. Sam left me your number in case of emergencies.” She sounded frantic.

“Is everything okay?” 

“Can you please come over? Max is really sick and… he’s… he’s asking for you.”

*****

Instead of knocking on the door, you straight up punched the security key and barged into the house.

“Max? Alex?”

“Up here!” You heard Alex’s voice. Taking two steps at a time you made it to Max’s room. Your chest contracted, seeing Max in the bed. He was curled up on his side, cheeks wet, face puffy from crying. 

Alex was sitting on a chair next to him, distressed.

“What’s wrong?” You asked, rushing to Max’s side and placing a hand against his forehead. He was burning up.

“I don’t know,” said Alex, “He was fine when I picked him up from school. He said he was feeling sick half an hour ago and now he’s running a fever. I tried calling his usual doctor but it says the number doesn’t exist anymore. He’s been crying and calling out for Sam and... you.”

“Did you try Sam?”

“He’s not reachable.”

“Max, honey, what’s wrong?” You asked as gently as you could. “Do you hurt somewhere?”

He opened his eyes and your heart lurched at the tears in them. “Stomach. My stomach hurts. I want dad.”

“Sam will be home at night. He’ll be with you.” You turned to Alex. “Is he allergic to something?” 

“Not that I know of.”

You were sure he hadn’t had outside food in at least a week, so food poisoning was out.

“Does your body hurt, baby?”

Max nodded slowly, drawing into himself. “And my head.”

“Alex, could you please find the first aid box and get me a thermometer?”

She scampered off to find it, relieved to have someone else take charge of the situation. Keeping one hand on Max’s forehead, you reached out for your purse with the other and pulled out your phone. Thankfully, the number was on the speed dial. He picked up the phone on the second ring.

“Cas, where are you?”

“At the hospital. Everything okay?”

“No. Max is running a high fever. I’d guess around 101. He says he’s feeling sick, and has stomach and body ache.”

There was a pause, then Cas said. “Can you drive him to the hospital? Bring him directly to the paeds ward on the 7th floor. I’ll see you there in fifteen minutes.”

Alex was back with the thermometer. 102.3. Thankfully, she had a license and Claire’s car was in their driveway. You asked her to bring it out front.

After she left, you gently coaxed Max into a sitting position, he looked drowsy and was still sniffling a little. “Honey, listen to me. You’re going to have to deal with a little inconvenience, okay? We’re going to drive you to the hospital very quickly.”

“Hospital?” He mumbled. eyes filling up again. 

“It’s just Cas there,” you soothed him. “You remember Cas, right? We all played jenga together.”

Max opened his mouth to say something, instead his eyes widened and threw up over the front of your sweater and into your lap. 

He started crying immediately. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

Your eyes filled up. “It’s okay, baby. It’s no big deal.” You removed the puke covered sweater and used to wipe away the vomit stuck to your jeans. “See, it’s all gone. No need to worry at all.”

The retching had left him weak and shivering. 

“Just stay put a minute.” You hurriedly tossed your sweater in the hamper by the door, and pulled on one of Sam’s overlarge shirts over your T-shirt. Once back, you grabbed Max’s grey blanket and wrapped it around him. Slinging your purse around your torso, you lifted him in your arms and carried into the car that was already waiting at the curb. You held Max close to your chest in the backseat, whispering soft reassurances in his ears. 

Just as Alex pulled up in front of the hospital, Max threw up on you again. It made him cry harder. You realised it was not just humiliating for him, he was missing his dad terribly. 

“Max, honey, it’s totally okay,” you assured him, kissing his brow. “I used to throw up so much as a kid, gran used to call me projectile Y/N. Just puke all around me all the time. Hell, ask your dad. He held my hair when I threw up in the toilet. It’s my jam. And we’ve got a  towel now. Let’s clean you up, okay?”

Thankfully, the blanket wasn’t soiled, so you could keep it around him as you carried him in the lift.

Cas was waiting for you there. He immediately guided you to a bed and laid Max down on it. You started to step back.

“Y/N, don’t go,” Max rasped out. 

“I’m right here, Chirp. I’m not going anywhere, but Cas needs to take a look at you.”

Max still reached out with his hand. You looked at Cas. He gave you a quick nod and you rushed to Max’s side once more, grasping his outstretched fingers tightly. Cas pressed Max’s tummy, asking where exactly it hurt, then checked the temperature again along with the pulse. You watched apprehensively as Cas pulled down Max’s eyelids and asked more questions. Meanwhile, the chills kept getting worse.

“It looks like he’s caught a viral fever. The nurse outside told me it’s been doing a round at the school. We’ve had many kids this week.”

“Why is he throwing up then?”

“It’s probably the phlegm. I don’t think there’s a reason to worry. I’ll give him an IV with paracetamol and nausea suppressants. He’ll feel much better in a few hours.” Cas hesitated. “Maybe you should ask Sam before we start the treatment. Only he can sign off on the papers. You’ll need the details of the health insurance.”

“I can’t get to him. We’ve been trying non-stop.” 

Would Sam want you to make such decisions on his behalf? Max was looking paler than usual and was clearly in pain. You couldn’t wait till midnight to start him on medication. It was killing you to see him hurting like this.

“Screw the insurance. I’ll pay whatever the bill comes out to be… and I’ll sign off on the papers as well.”

Cas gave you an apprehensive look. “Y/N?”

“Look,” you said through your teeth, “I’m still his legal guardian. I have that right. Just start him on the medication. I can’t bear to see him like this.”

“Alright.” Cas said something to the nurse behind him who rushed out and then came back with a syringe. 

“This is going to hurt just a little, Max,” Cas said, flicking at the needle.

You crouched down next to Max’s head. “You’re my brave boy, aren’t you? One little prick and that will be all. You’ll feel so much better afterwards. Can you do that?” 

Max gave you one quick jerk of his neck. “Close your eyes.” He did. 

Cas pushed the needle into the tiny crease of Max’s arm and you flinched, tears pouring down your cheeks. Max did not even make a whimper. The nurse stuck a piece of white tape over the puncture mark after Cas was done.

“You need to swallow these two little tablets,” Cas said, handing them to Max along with a glass of water. Max looked at you and you nodded encouragingly. Without any fuss, he did as Cas said. You hugged Max very tightly to your chest. “You’re the bravest little thing in this world, you know that? And I’m so damn proud of you. You get every cookie you can think of when you feel better, yeah?”

“We’ll keep him here till the nausea subsides,” said Cas. “Once he feels better, you can take him home.”

Cas seemed concerned, but it wasn’t directed at Max- which made you feel better. It was directed at you. “You better sign off on those papers, Y/N.”

“Can you please bring them here?” You pleaded. “I don’t want to leave Max.” The boy in question was still hugging your middle tightly.

“Of course.”

It was with shivering hands that you filled out the form. You stared at the paper for a whole minute before ticking off on the small box in the relationship to the patient column against mother. Max had fallen asleep in your arms and the tears just wouldn’t stop. You knew he was going to be okay, the fever was already coming down and he had stopped shivering. Sweat dewed up on his forehead. 

Occasionally you wiped it off with the back of your sleeve. 

But you were terrified of this feeling- like the world would go dark if a single wrong thing happened to this boy. There was a point in your life when you were ready to own up to this feeling, looking forward to it even- and then you had lost it, along with every other emotion in your heart. Since the day you had met Max, you’d been dancing along the edge of the precipice of this very feeling- this selfless, immense love. Not ready to take the leap. Scared that you’d be shattered if you did.

Were you scared of being a bad mother? Or were you simply scared of being a mother? 

As you sat there, alone, in the small clinical room, with Max softly snoring in your lap, you realised that what you truly feared above and beyond everything was giving in to feeling this love and losing it again. 

If you accepted him as your son, and then something happened to him, you wouldn’t make it out of it alive. Literally. Not accepting Sam’s love and a place in his and Max’s life was not only a product of your doubts and self-hatred. It was a plain survival instinct. The epiphany was so strong, it left you breathless.

You felt a hand against your shoulder. Cas’s blue eyes were sympathetic in their depth. “You can take him home now, Y/N.” He didn’t try to reassure you beyond it. He had a subtle way of comforting without saying the words out loud.

You called Alex again, who had been reading in the waiting room and she drove you back to Max’s place. He’d been asleep through the ride, right until you put him to bed. Insisting that Alex go back home and study for her exams, you stripped down to your tank top, pulled on a pair of Sam’s tracks. After making sure that Max was still out, you cleaned up your clothes, and the mess on the floor and side of Max’s bed. You didn’t dare close the door of the bathroom, lest Max call out to you and you couldn’t answer. 

Taking the chance, you made some chicken soup for him, and only then did you wake him up, gently. 

Max called out for Sam the moment he opened his eyes and your heart broke again. Doing your best to reassure him that Sam was on his way, you cajoled Max into changing out of his dirty clothes and into fresh ones. 

He refused to eat the soup, but with soft insistence, you persuaded him to finish half a bowl of it. 

“You’ll read to me?” He said in a muted, dull voice as you tucked him back in the bed.

“Of course, sweetheart, what do you want me to read?”

“Anything.”

You looked around the room, your eyes landing on the only book over his nightstand. 

“Alright, here we go.” You flipped to the page with a bookmark. “We could not wait for Atticus to come home for dinner, but called and said we had a big surprise for him. He seemed surprised when he saw most of the back yard in the front yard, but he said we had done a jim-dandy job. “I didn’t know how you were going to do it,” he said to Jem, “but from now on I’ll never worry about what’ll become of you, son, you’ll always have an idea...”

*********

It was stupid and incredibly irresponsible on Sam’s part to let his phone drain out completely. Even worse, he’d left it to charge in the meeting room and forgotten to check it in the next couple of hours while he met with the children in the boy’s home. He came back to 17 missed calls and 23 text messages- from Alex and Y/N. 

Max was sick and he’d had no idea.

Sam had frantically called first thing after going through the texts. Y/N had picked up only to whisper that Max was better and asleep, and that Sam needn’t worry. For the next five hours, Sam worried ceaselessly anyway. It drove Chase up the wall, but he played his music loudly in the car all the way till Sam dropped him off and didn’t point out how Sam was a total maniac. 

The clock on his dashboard blinked 1:22 as he made the bend to his house.

Sam parked the car all wrong in the driveway, barely giving it a second thought before running inside. He should’ve been quieter, knowing Max was asleep, but the anxiety barely kept his legs moving. He would have continued at the same rate through Max’s door if the scene before him hadn’t made him stop.

On the bed, Max was sleeping peacefully. He was dressed in a thin cotton t-shirt, the lower half of his body was covered in his blanket. That wasn’t what made Sam stop. Y/N was curled up beside him, her arm thrown around Max, who was nextled so comfortably in her embrace that he belonged there. Max’s book was balanced over Y/N’s hip, wedged open on the page she had been reading out of. On the nightstand, stood a bowl of cold soup, half empty, along with water and strips of medicine. The table on Y/N’s side held a cooking pot filled with water and a washcloth lay dipped in it. She’d been nursing him- from fever or the sweat, Sam couldn’t say.

Slowly, he walked up to Max, and very very carefully placed the back of his hand on his forehead. No fever. 

Sam looked about himself. The floor was strewn with Max’s clothes that smelled like he had been sick over them. Sam picked up the clothes and carried them to the washing machine. Inside was already a dry load of clothes that belonged to Y/N and him. So Max had thrown up on her. More than once.

Sam knew from the messages that Y/N had taken Max to the hospital- had her friend, whom she trusted implicitly take a look at his son, signed the papers as his guardian and paid the bill out of her pocket.

The thought occurred to Sam as he undressed for the night. In that last message, Y/N had apologised for signing off on Sam’s behalf, as if he could ever be mad at her for dropping whatever she was doing to look after his son, the way a mother would.

Sam understood now why Max had thrown a fit when Sam had forbidden him from seeing Y/N. It had hurt Sam that he couldn’t be enough for Max, that Max was looking for something more in Y/N. But seeing them together now, Sam could see he had been completely wrong. Max wasn’t asking something more, he’d been asking for what already belonged to him- Y/N’s love. Max had been right all along.

Sam pulled the covers and duvet off his bed and dragged to Max’s room where he laid them out at the foot of Max’s bed, so he’d be sleeping next to him on the floor. An alarm started going off on Y/N’s phone, and Sam jumped to turn it off. It was already 2 O’ clock. She had set successive alarms for every hour of the night, Sam presumed to check on Max. Sam turned off all of them. He was home now, he could take care of it. 

He checked Max’s temperature once more- still normal- and then bent down to place a kiss on his forehead. It was almost November. Max always had bouts of viral or flu in the cold months. He should have foreseen it. If Y/N hadn’t been around…

The expression on her face was so peaceful as she held onto his boy, tears sprang into Sam’s eyes. This was everything he wanted in his life. Everything. Right in front of him. He bent down once more and planted a soft kiss on her cheek. She didn’t wake at his touch, but adjusted herself closer to Max on the tiny bed, the book falling off her hip with a soft thud onto the thick carpet. 

Sam lay down on the floor, thinking of a night very long ago when Y/N had fallen asleep on the  sofa in his house, back in Lawrence. He’d read to her from this very book that night- for the first time. Sam had slept besides her on the floor that night as well. A writer would have called the parallel poetic… but Sam saw it for what it was, shrouded in a mist of uncertainty all around him- a haunting ache inside his soul.

He couldn’t thank her for what she’d done for his Max today- not only would that gesture be insufficient, it would be insulting. No, Sam wouldn’t thank her. Instead, he would check up on Max every hour, make her breakfast in bed, and iron her clothes before she woke up, so she wouldn't be late for classes tomorrow. He would pack her a lunch and kiss her goodbye at the door. Maybe she would see through him and understand how incredibly grateful he was for today… and how tragically hopeful he was for the future, when he could do these simple things everyday without the excuse of an unsaid thank you.

“I love you, Darling,” he whispered. “It can only ever be you.”

*****************************

A/N 2: It’s been a hard, awful few days. I must be made up of stronger stuff than I thought I was.

Please do let me know if you liked this part. Reblogs and comments are very much appreciated. 

Five more chapters to go!

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[pedropascallovebot]

Let's Kill Tonight

summary: You're a bit out of practice, but being entrusted with the retrieval and return of Helmut Zemo shouldn't be too hard, right? Even if he is your old sorta-boss and you still are nursing unfortunate loyalty towards the team. You can manage. And him being... slightly more attractive than how you last left him won't be a problem.

Right?

warnings and a/n: i have.... no clue what this is if not a complete rewrite of mcu canon purely for self-indulgence. reader has a kinda shady past and in result will talk graphically about violence in later chapters and there's lots of gun action in this one. very fun, very cool! alright. i hope y'all enjoy teehee

—

The weather where you're at doesn’t usually vary much from a sunny sky, but alas, you’re absolutely drenched by the time you step inside the diner. You hadn’t expected the rain. Your usual five minute walk to work turned into a hike through muddy sidewalks and water droplets that kept hitting your eyes, and by the time you tied your apron around your waist the day felt over before it even started. Your boss gives you a closed-lip smile and glances at your empty section of tables, and you just know you’re going to be late on rent again.

For what it’s worth, Lüleburgaz isn’t the worst place to slip under the radar. It’s not underpopulated by any means, but it makes it perfect to blend in with the crowd as best you can. Honestly, you're just trying to make it a day without a proper therapist. Your roommates are great listeners, don't get it twisted- but all they really know about you is you're Sokovian and they don't really need to hear about the stuff that happened before your country was crushed by some guys in tights and iron suits. They don't ask you much, and you're grateful.  After an unfortunate five-year gap in employment (which isn’t your fault- it’s kinda hard to find jobs when you’re reduced to dust unexpectedly) you were lucky to find somewhere that was willing to hire you without a legally issued identification card and that was also willing to pay in cash under the table. You broke out the books and attempted to learn the language as best as you can, and while you're struggling a bit, you can at least understand the menu and what a customer is ordering. It was far from ideal- ideal would be completely erasing any trace of memory regarding you and your… history, so to speak, from anybody who has the potential to be a threat to you. Ideal could also be an island somewhere, maybe Praslin or Nassau, where you could swim in clear waters and drink copious amounts of fancy fruity drinks instead of whatever liquor your roomies had hiding under the counter. But until that happens, being on the sorta-run for some questionable past career choices seems to stick.

Said questionable career choices led you to be introduced to a network of interesting people, some less horrible than others, but all of them carried the same unmistakable signal of danger displayed in flashing lights above their heads. When you hear the bell to the restaurant door jingle, signaling the arrival of someone new, that weird gut feeling activates and your eyes flicker up to see a pair of high heels and sunglasses, even though the sun hasn’t been out all day. Everyone else eating their food don’t even spare a glance to the door. This should comfort you, it should tell you that you're fine and that there's nothing to worry about, but it absolutely doesn’t and suddenly you’re inconspicuously making your way to the back, muttering something to your boss about taking your break early. Ripping off your apron, you throw it to the side and let it land on the ground next to you, and you lean your head against the brick wall behind you. Your fingers are twitching as the pressing issue of impending doom continues to rise in your gut. You barely register the creaking sound of the back gate opening.

“Do you want a cigarette?” Suddenly, you’re in fighting stance as an unfamiliar voice speaks less than a foot away from your ear. You don’t recognize this new face, but she looks expensive and entirely too out of place for a diner that receives in its eggs already prepared and frozen.

“I’ll take that as a no, then,” she continues, and fishes a lighter and pack out of her coat pocket. “Good choice. These things will kill you- and so will this godawful food you serve here. What a relief that after today you won’t step foot in this place ever again, huh?”

Your mouth opens to say something, but you decide against it. Instead, you slightly lower your fists, keeping your eyes trained on her seemingly unbothered expression. She takes a long drag of her cigarette before giving you any more information. The silence is deafening, and you mentally take note of the clear path you have through the open fence and towards the street if you chose to run. Something tells you this lady didn’t arrive here on foot though, and she probably had an expensive vehicle waiting out front waiting to catch up to you if you chose to make a break for it.

“You’re jumpy- probably a little bit out of practice from the whole ex-assassin thing, right? I can work with that. I have to applaud you: as far as hide and seek spots go, this wasn’t horrible. We’ll have to improve your people skills, but-“

“Who are you?”

You grow increasingly frustrated as it starts to sprinkle again, leaving you cold and wet as your company opens an umbrella she had previously stored away in her coat.

“I don’t like being interrupted, so let’s not make it a habit, hm? My name is Valentina Allegra de Fontaine, and you’ve become annoyingly important to my cause. Come on, we’re leaving.”

She begins to walk towards the gate, but you stay put, beginning to toy with the idea of unsheathing the knife stored in your boot.

“I’m not going anywhere with you, lady.”

This makes her turn around and sigh in frustration.

“The way I see it, you have two choices. Go back and finish bussing tables so you can make an extra couple dollars, or come with me so we can talk real business. As far as I’m concerned, you’re the only one between the two of us that poses a threat. I’m not the one with weapons hidden in my clothes, am I?”

Your eyes narrow, but you don’t argue. Instead, you hesitantly join her in her path towards a gaudy car (you knew it) that looks way too out of place to be in this parking lot. For a split second you consider going back and giving your manager somewhat of a notice of your absence, but Valentina’s walking so fast that you don’t really have time to continue considering.

“By the way, I distinctively said my name is Valentina Allegra de Fontaine- I don’t like to repeat myself, don’t make me do it again.”

-

You barely have time to sit down before Valentina is barking directions at her driver and scolding you for getting rain water in her backseat. You remain silent, and a little bit uncomfortable as Val finishes her cigarette completely before bothering to inform you of whatever the hell she’s got going on.

“Tell me what you know about super soldiers,” she finally gives, crossing her legs and glances at you expectantly.

You search her face for any kind of indication that she’s kidding, but she seems serious. It kinda feels like your soul is being stared into and you want to look away but you can’t. What does she not know about super soldiers that she can learn from you and not from literally anywhere else? Admittedly, all you know is what clips of newspapers would give you. Something about rogue experimentation, something-something Winter Soldier, and then, most recently, the Flag-Smashers and the rumors flying around that they've got some serum floating around. All of this seemed to be public knowledge though. Nothing a woman who’s willing to corner people in the backlots of their jobs couldn’t find out from a simple Google search.

“I asked you a question, didn’t I?”

“I can’t say I know much.”

For what feels like the millionth time in the span of twenty minutes, she sighs, bringing out her cell phone and starts punching some buttons.

“And what about this man? Does he ring a bell?”

You do your absolute best to not look as tense as you feel when out of the corner of your eye you see a familiar face in a tiny, grainy picture. She shoves the device in your hands, and right there center of the screen is-

“Zemo, right? That was a trick question. Hard to forget the face of your old boss, I’d assume.”

Suddenly, you’re upright in your seat, the earlier feeling of danger settling right back into place. Valentina, of course, just lets out a laugh, while you’re planning on swan-diving out the damn window.

“The Colonel isn’t my boss,” you protest, and a burning sensation makes its way to your throat.

“Isn’t he though?” Valentina is now fully turned towards you, her hand reaching to grab the phone back. More buttons are pressed, and she’s reading your name from an official looking online database. “It says here you’re wanted in a lot of countries, huh? I wonder why that is- oh, look at this, would you? Seems like your name and EKO Scorpion are mentioned in the same sentence at least three times just on this page.”

Your eyes narrow, and you waste no more time in grabbing your gun from your coat pocket, and Valentina seems to have the same idea, the phone  in her hands is now replaced with a much newer and nicer pistol than you’re carrying. It’s silent in the car for a few seconds, and the driver in the front dares not move a muscle. Val is the first to break, and she lowers her weapon with a shit-eating grin you’re growing tired of seeing.

“Let’s start over. You’re associated with an elite death squad assigned to defend the interests of a country that’s no more than a pile of rubble and dead memorial flowers on the ground. You never had an official invitation, but they paid you good enough money for you to get your hands dirty for them. Too bad that without a leader, your little syndicate fell apart, didn’t it? Unfortunate, what happened to him really. And how inconvenient it must have been for you- I’m sure the law doesn’t usually side with individuals associated with terrorists. Luckily for you, you had a five-year break from being on the run.”

The urge to fall back into old form and pull the trigger at the slightest sign of trouble starts to rear its ugly head, but you take a deep breath and try to align your focus to your current situation. This doesn’t have to be deadly. She knows your history, she knows your name. She could just be blackmailing you. Easy fix, offer her better information on individuals that are far, far away from you. You’re sure you can think of something juicy enough to entertain her and fray her interest in you. This doesn’t have to end in a gunshot. She has access to all of the shit you’ve done. You don’t know what she knows. She could be from the American government. Kill her, and lessen the risk of being thrown in a prison cell to rot.You’re desperate, and you’re scared, and it’s making you vulnerable. You take another deep breath in, and lower your gun.

“What do you want?” Valentina falls back into her seat, clearly very amused by the entire situation now that guns weren’t drawn.

“The Flag-Smashers are becoming increasingly difficult as they’re forming alliances with seemingly every gang of mercenaries for hire. The serum belongs in the hands of someone who knows what to do with it, don’t you think?”

This lady is clearly out of her mind, but you’re too far in now and you don’t feel like questioning her on her morals or the ethics of this situation.

“I don’t want any business with Morganthau, and I don’t care about super soldiers. If that’s all you need me for, you might as well find someone else.”

“Who said anything about you dealing with Flag-Smashers? No, for you,” she starts, grabbing the phone once more and resuming that annoying clicking as she searches through various links, “I have a slightly less… hazardous task. No killing involved, sadly. I’m sure your lovely skillset will keep until it’s needed, but you will be finding Zemo for me, where I can pay him far too much money so he’ll kill the Flag-Smashers for me.”

It’s your turn to laugh, now. “In case you haven’t heard, Helmut Zemo is rotting away in prison for the rest of his life. How is he going to be of any help to you?”

Valentina doesn’t bother giving you a verbal response, just shoves that damn phone in your face again. You glare at her before your eyes skim over the article. Breakout. Zemo. The Falcon. Prison. You curse internally, and she lets her arm fall back to her side. You realize you haven’t been paying too much attention to where the driver was taking you both until you feel the vehicle holt to a stop, and you look up to realize you’re in a parking garage, and the faint sounds of airplanes fly overhead.

“As of now, you and I are a two-man team, but this won’t be the case for long. Zemo is with Sam Wilson and James Barnes in a safehouse in Riga. You and I aren’t the only ones looking for him, however, which makes your job a little tricky, but I don’t have much faith in the guy assigned in returning him to Berlin.”

“Who is he?”

“I assume the name John Walker doesn’t need an explanation?”

You shake your head.

“Walker can be of use to us, and we’re gonna need him- just not yet. What I need from you at the current moment is to make sure you get to these coordinates,” the driver is suddenly handing you a slip of paper with numbers scribbled on it, and you take it, “before Walker gets Zemo.”

You inhale, and Valentina gives you a look.

“I assume you have a question?”

“Wouldn’t it be easier to get Walker on your side sooner? Maybe if you could say the right thing, persuade him to bring Zemo to us-"

Valentina cuts you off with a scoff. “What? That if we tell Captain America to hand over an international prisoner so we can extract information and hire him to kill for us he’ll do it? Walker wants one thing right now: he wants that serum. Coincidentally, your friend Zemo wants that serum gone. IF we get to him first, which you will, he’ll be more than happy to oblige. Walker is at a tipping point, but he’s not useful to us. Yet. We just have to wait until he's vulnerable.”

She takes your silence as an okay to continue. “Get to Latvia, find Zemo. Use that pretty face of yours to charm him into coming with you, maybe share some war stories around the campfire. I don’t give a damn how you get it done. Walker’s already halfway there by now.”

You are really starting to question how Valentina is getting her information, but before you can say anything else, she’s motioning for her driver to slide another piece of paper in your hand. Your eyes go wide at the numbers listed after a dollar sign.

“I assume this would be enough to cover your services?”

You look up at her, nodding your head slightly.

“Half now, half when you bring him to me,” she finishes, and the driver is unlocking your side of the car. “It looks like we’re in business then.”

[not-close-to-straight]

Soul Bonded (Two)(Spideypool)

PART ONE HERE

SERIES MASTERLIST HERE

************

“Oh hey, I know those guys.” Clint peeked over Pepper’s shoulder when he saw the video playing on her tablet. “How’d you get that video footage? Not even the Daily Planet manages that good of a look at them.”

“You know, I’ve learned not to ask where or how JARVIS comes up with surveillance videos.” Pepper took her eyes off the screen only long enough to kiss the other Omega’s cheek and to lay a gentle hand at the non existent bump of Clint’s stomach. “How are you and my next favorite niece and nephew doing today?” 

“I dunno why everyone thinks I’m having twins.” Clint complained mildly. “We all see how big Steve is with baby James. If a super soldier can barely handle just one kiddo, what makes you think I can handle two?” 

“Cos you already handle one set of twins so well!” the sweet Omega laughed at Clint’s disgruntled expression, and lifted her fluffy pink wings to brush against his darker ones. “Tony says the young mutant with webs is named Peter Parker and the bigger one is Deadpool. He wants me to try and get a hold of them and bring them by the compound.” 

“Peter’s younger than Wanda and Pietro, and Deadpool’s real name is Wade, but trust me, he’s not the type to share his Omega.” Clint pointed out, and then immediately after, “Oh but with our Alpha starting to step aside with the Iron Man thing, he wants two more mutants on the team and around the family to keep us safe. That makes more sense than the other thing.” 

“Exactly.” Pepper rewound the footage to the spot where the admittedly beautiful Omega showed off sheer jaw dropping strength as he shoved the Alpha off him. “They seem rough, together. I’ve never seen a pair wrestle like that before. Isn’t the Alpha worried about hurting his mate?” 

“Wade’s mutation keeps him halfway to feral all the time, but Peter’s got some spider thing going on, so he channels predator half the time anyway. They’re fine. It’s like violent flirting, but best I can tell, neither one ever gets hurt.”

Clint pulled a chair up next to Pepper and snuggled in under her wings, soaking in every bit of the love she so readily gave. Tony might be the family Alpha, but Pepper was the family’s matriarch, kept them all together and fed and clothed and made sure Stark Industries stayed successful so Tony could afford to give their always growing family everything. 

The pretty Omega exuded pure comfort right along with unwavering resolve and underlying steel that made her a powerhouse in both the business world and in front of the press. Simply put, Pepper was perfect and even with her layers of suppressants, she scented like home and like love and all good things so Clint curled in closer and purred low in contentment. 

“Sweet Omega.” Pepper dropped a kiss on Clint’s head and ran light fingers through his feathers. “Have you started craving anything? Getting over tired yet?”

“Not too bad.” Clint promptly yawned and she laughed at him. “I’m only like three or four weeks out, you know? Tony figured it out right away so we are still ages away from me even starting to feel pregnant.” 

“Hmmm.” she kept playing with the feathers closest to his shoulders and Clint sighed and relaxed into the familiar touch. “You called this Alpha Wade. You know him personally?” 

“We have lunch together like once a month.” Clint mumbled. He was honestly lulled halfway to sleep right there on Pepper’s shoulder but he startled when she jumped and cursed. “Sheesh! What?!” 

“You have lunch with him?” Pepper’s pink wings ruffed up in concern. “Clint! If our Alpha knew you were out there with such a volatile mutant, he would lose his mind! Deadpool is dangerous!” 

“I think you’re forgetting that I can take care of myself just as well as anyone else in this compound.” The Omega said firmly, almost irritably. “Do you really think I’d hang out with someone I was scared of? Wade’s got a rough past, but he’s okay now.” 

“Clint, that’s not what I’m--”

“Pep.” Clint pulled away entirely now, dark brown wings lifting above his shoulders as his irritation grew. “We live in the same building as the Hulk and I regularly share a bed with the former Winter Soldier and the stabbiest, scariest ballerina in the world. How is Wade any different than them?”

“Don’t be angry with me darling.” She tried. “It’s just--” 

“Cos he’s a little closer to feral?” Clint interrupted. “Because his bad days are a hell of a lot worse than ours? Cos his wings aren’t pretty and perfect? Since when does anyone have to be pretty and perfect to fit into this family? You’re about the only one in this place with no blood on her hands, Pep. Don’t turn your back on Wade because the blood on his hands is a littler newer than what’s still staining--” 

“Clint.” Pepper cupped the Omega’s chin and forced him to look at her. “Clint, I wasn’t going to say any of that. I was just going to say that if our Alpha found out you’d been meeting with someone so dangerous, he’d put an immediate stop to it until he could do some research and make sure Wade’s worst days are behind him. Tony never tells you no about anything, but he would say no to this until he knew you and the babies weren’t in danger.”

“...oh.”

“I love how quickly you stand up for everyone.” Pepper coaxed Clint back into her arms, put the tablet down and turned so she was facing him better. “You did it with Bucky when Natasha wasn’t sure about him, you stepped right in with Thor and Loki to welcome them to the family, and I’m not surprised you’re doing the same for Wade. But honestly, it’s weird enough that you have friends outside our family and it’s even weirder that none of us know about him.” 

“And this isn’t about who Wade used to be, or what he’s done and good god, you know it’s not about his looks.” she continued. “It’s about making sure our loved ones are safe before bringing anyone home. Steve didn’t bring Bucky home until he was sure the Winter Soldier was gone. Thor came with Coulson’s personal recommendation and Thor waited to bring Loki along until he knew they were settled and had worked through some of their anger.” 

“And now?” the Omega glanced pointedly at Clint’s stomach, then motioned upstairs where Bucky and Loki were napping with Baby Maria and where Thor and Tony were currently putting the last touches on Baby James’s nursery. “Now it’s not just a houseful of super powered or otherwise capable and scary people we’re thinking about. Now there are babies to think about too. Tony would want to meet Wade before he let the Alpha meet anyone else only because our family has grown to fourteen and soon--” 

She patted at his tummy again. “Sixteen. Our Alpha will soon have sixteen people to look after. Finding out that you have been hanging out with one of the most astonishing and breathtakingly dangerous Alphas...well we all know what happened with Director Fury when Tony thought he was trying to recruit Bucky, right? The last thing we need is our Alpha going toe to toe with someone like Wade because his initial reaction to his mate spending time with Deadpool would be to go and rip Wade’s wings right off.” 

“I guess I never thought to say anything.” Clint frowned, wings drooping, and Pepper immediately crooned at him comfortingly. “We used to run into each other when I worked at Shield, and I’ve told him to bring Pete up for dinner a few times, he’s just never accepted the invite. He’s a good guy, Pep. I promise. I wouldn’t bring anyone into our home who wasn’t.” 

“I know you wouldn’t.” She reassured him. “But how about I break the news to Tony that you know Wade personally, hm? I’ll promise I’ll phrase it better than ‘your pregnant Omega regularly has lunch dates with someone who carries two katanas, three different guns and has the unnerving ability to regenerate everything’.” 

“Fine.” Clint finally smiled again, leaned in and bumped their noses gently. “I’ll let you tell Tony about Wade.” 

Clint cuddled up for another few minutes then wandered off to see if Sam would take him for ice cream-- the Beta was helpless against babies and expecting Omegas and Clint fully intended to take supreme advantage of it for the next eight months-- and Pepper went back to taking notes about the footage of Wade and his mate, Peter. 

“JARVIS?” she called and the AI’s system clicked just once to show he was listening, a feature Tony had installed when he realized Bucky had a hard time with J just speaking out unexpectedly. “Let’s get some of the material ordered that Tony used to create Bruce’s room. Not the safe room below the laboratory, but his actual living quarters. Weighted blankets, the daylight lamps instead of the usual lighting, the higher security on the doors, all that sort of thing.” 

“The Alpha Deadpool will need similar accommodations due to PTSD?” 

“I’m not sure.” she admitted. “But it’s probably a safe bet, and even if Wade doesn’t need those things, I’d rather have it all on hand than need them and have to go get them. Turn on the systems in one of the adjoining suites like Wanda and Pietro have, one of the rooms can be for his mate. Order materials to construct some perches and higher up places for the Omega. Apparently he’s got a rather spidery inclination.”  

“Ms. Potts, a rather spidery inclination doesn’t necessarily mean the Omega wants to sleep in the corners.” 

“No, I suppose not.” the disapproval from JARVIS was nearly tangible and Pepper laughed softly, “But it couldn’t hurt, right? What if he webs up in the corner and naps?” 

“Honestly, ma’am.” 

“Order additional high protein foods as well. We’re already getting to the point of needing to raise our own food just to keep up with the soldiers, but the addition of two more metahumans will strain our pantry to about breaking.” 

“Yes ma’am.” 

“Thank you.” Pepper finally gave up rewatching the same videos over and over and went to find their Alpha, trying to figure out how to tell an increasingly protective Tony that his newly pregnant mate had been spending time with a mercenary. 

She’d have to make sure he was holding Baby Maria just so he wouldn’t shout. 

Sigh. 

Their life was absolutely crazy.

************

************

School buses weren't supposed to blow tires and careen wildly around the freeway at sixty plus miles an hour and then plummet off the overpass into the traffic below, but that’s exactly what happened. 

It could have been an error of judgment when the tires had last been filled, it could have been a less than motivated operator who rushed the vehicle inspection before the kids loaded on for their field trip, it could have been something unexpectedly sharp on the road that hit just right and sent the relatively calm day into chaos. 

Whatever it was, it was terrifying and Peter didn’t so much hear the screams as he felt them clang around his head when his spidey sense went haywire. The Omega dropped to his knees with a quiet cry, hands over his ears and maroon wings wrapped around his body as he tried to limit the sensory input and figure out what exactly was happening.

“Pete?” Wade dropped to the ground right by the Omega, dark wings up and around them to fend off any prying eyes. “Hey baby boy, what’s up? What’s going on?” 

“Something is really really wrong.” Peter gasped, scrambled for his mask and jammed it on. “Something’s wrong, Alpha. I gotta figure out what it is.” 

He pushed away from Wade and bolted for an alley, shouted, “Keep an eye out for me!” then threw himself up the wall. Wade couldn’t do much more than watch helplessly as the Omega webbed his way towards the roof so he could try and see what was happening

“Oh shit.” Wade saw the bus right when Peter did, and he took off running for the nearby crowd, pushing people out of the way and shouting for the others to move. 

“Get out!” He shouted, snapping his wings out to try and rush pedestrians out of the area, growling in frustration when people just glanced at him and glanced away. “Damn it! Move your ass there’s a goddamn bus heading this way! Fucking move!” 

Peter as Spider-man jumped down into the crowd and the pedestrians panicked when he started simply webbing slower moving people and yanking them out of the way. Wade ran around trying to help, shoving Alphas and Betas off into the side alley’s, trying hard to gently but quickly force the Omegas off the street, both of them screaming for someone to call the police, to call an ambulance, to call for help---

-- the noise the bus made as it crashed through the barrier was unbelievable, the echo of screams inside horrifying and the Alpha had only a split second to register a flash of maroon wings --

--and everything came to a stop. 

The world came to a stop and all Wade could see was his mate his mate halfway to crushed beneath the front end grill the bus, legs braced and arms straining to hold the weight and not for the first time the Alpha remembered that Peter wasn’t just pretty, he wasn’t just funny, the Omega was damn near supernatural. 

And then Peter screamed, cried out because everything hurt and he might have been outrageously strong but he was still human and it hurt and Wade went scrambling to figure out how to take some of the weight off his Omega. He wrapped his wings around Peter’s slim frame and braced his arms on the underside of the bus too so Peter had at least a little bit of support. When the Alpha let his strength surge, he could take on close to half a ton which didn’t even touch the amount his Omega could hold, but at least it was something. 

“I’ve got you, baby boy.” he hissed out between clenched teeth. “Let’s get this thing down, huh?” 

“Slow.” Peter gasped, sweating through his mask, through his clothes, his honeysuckle scent burned bitter with fear and pain. “Slow, Alpha. I gotta-- I gotta move towards the back so it doesn’t crush when it lands. You got this part?” 

“Not even a little bit.” Wade stated calmly. “But we both know I’ll regenerate from being squashed flat, and no one on the bus will, so you do what you gotta do.” 

Christ it was excruciating trying to hold onto even just part of the bus as Peter inched his way further down the underside of it, holding it as steady as he could and having Wade scoot along behind him until the front wheels touched. It was easier after that without all twelve tons on their arms, but Wade’s arms were still shaking by the time they made it to the back wheels, his back aching and wings trembling with the effort of holding what his Omega made look so easy. 

“Out.” Wade ordered when it was just him underneath the rear wheels. “Get out from beneath this thing and hold it from the other side.” 

“I’m fine, Alpha.” Peter shook his head. “This could drop on you the second I let go and I’m not doing that.” 

“I’ve come back from being splatted by far worse.” The Alpha said firmly. “One day I’ll tell you about my first run in with fuckin’ Colossus, but first you need to get out from under here. I’ll hold it for a few seconds while you get situated and if you have to vacuum me up and let me reassemble in the apartment, that’s just how it’s going to be.” 

“God, you’re gross, some days I don’t know why I like you..” Peter’s feathers shook uncertainly as he tried to time the maneuver. “Okay, I’m only going to let go for like three seconds alright?” 

“Get going before the kids start screaming again.” Wade retorted, so the Omega dashed away and for three endless seconds he really thought his back was going to shatter, he really thought his legs would give out or his arms would fall right the hell off. It was the longest three seconds of the Alpha’s life and just when he thought he couldn’t take it half a breath more, Peter was holding the rear bumper again, shouting for Wade to roll out from beneath it so he could put it down. 

Freedom.

The kids inside the bus started cheering the second the wheels were down, but Wade wasn’t listening and even if he had been listening, he didn’t care. 

All he cared about was the way Peter was looking at him right now. The Omega had set the bus down then ran for the shadows of the alley where he could tear his mask off and stare at Wade, chest heaving and feathers flutters and fingers pressing at the side of his neck where a bonding bite should go. When Wade met his eyes, the Omega tilted his head and parted his lips and dropped his wings submissive for just a split second in a clear invitation.

And a split second was all it took. 

Wade’s entire body snapped to attention, and when his Omega turned and fled, the Alpha took off after him, tucked his charcoal wings back and tore through the shadows after his mate as Peter laughed and trilled and egged him on.

They headed east towards Peter’s apartment to get to familiar streets, and once they made it past the park, up to the roofs they went. It wasn’t really fair of Peter to use webs to get so high so fast but Wade would never complain about being able to watch his Omega fly, the beautiful body soaring through the sky, the wings stretched out and catching the sun as he swung between the buildings. 

It wasn’t fair that Peter had webs, but Wade wasn’t complaining, and the Alpha just doubled his pace tearing up the stairs to get to the rooftop, bursting through doors and vaulting railings. His heart was pounding, scarred skin itching and veins crawling with feral rising red behind his eyes as Wade raced up and up and up. 

His mate had almost died. His mate had almost died. My mate almost died---

“Omega!” Wade burst through the rooftop door of Peter’s building, dented the steel as he rammed into it and skidded to a stop. “Peter!” 

“I’ve been waiting for you.” Peter jumped from the utility shed and landed with a light thump, tore off his mask and shucked his jacket and spread maroon wings open in an excited welcome for the Alpha. “What took you so long? Where have you  been? I want you.” 

Wade met him halfway across the roof, charcoal colored feathers hitching high and aggressive, eyes snapping scarlet as he grabbed for his mate and yanked him in for a brutal kiss.

“Where have you been?” Peter asked again, gasping through the kiss and scrabbling at Wade’s clothes, shoving his hands beneath the Alpha’s shirt to get to skin and moaning low, anxious when he could finally feel Wade’s heartbeat against his palm. “God, that’s good. I missed you. I know it's only been a minute but I missed you. That was incredible, we are incredible, you are incredible, I want to eat you alive.” 

Peter was talking a mile a minute, walking backwards towards the wall and dragging Wade with him, crushing kiss after greedy kiss to Wade’s mouth and hissing in excitement when the Alpha’s teeth stung at his bottom lip. “Yes my Alpha, yes more of that. More of you.” 

“Settle.” Wade rumbled, a damn useless word when he was no where close to settling, the liquor heady scent of turned on Omega like a shot of adrenaline to his heart, his soul, his cock. “Settle.” 

“Make me.” Peter’s hands went sticky at Wade’s side and he grabbed too tight, too greedy as they kissed again and again. “Make me settle. Bite me.” 

“Peter.” 

“Bite me.” The Omega half purred, half growled, turning his head to bare his neck even as he used that ridiculous strength to shove Wade against the wall. “Bite me, you know you want to. You want me just as bad as I want you and we just did something incredible together and I’m half outta my mind needing you.” 

“Settle.” Wade ordered again, dark feathers waving warningly in a display of dominance and a fight for self control  that made the Omega whine in pleasure. “Slow down, Omega.”

“Make me.” Peters eyes were bright, his smirk nearly devious, but his honeysuckle scent twisted longing when Wade’s hands settled at his waist. “Make me settle, Alpha.”

“I—“ Christ, sometimes Wade loathed himself. “I’m not your Alpha.”

“The fuck you aren’t.” The Omega ran his tongue over his teeth, then tipped his head to the side to show off the line of his throat, lush and inviting and practically dripping with want and need and mineyoursmineyoursmate. “Bite me, you coward.”

“Bed.” Wade said, instead of saying everything else, instead of just jerking forward and cutting into the Omega’s neck to finally bond. “Bed. Now.” 

“I shouldn’t let you knot me until you bite me.” Peter whispered, but he was already backing up towards the edge of the roof, already readying himself to web backwards and then twist into his bedroom window that was only a few feet below them. “I shouldn’t let you knot me until you say I’m yours but fuck, Alpha. I’m gagging for it. Gagging for you. So empty I wanna scream. Need you so bad. What we just did was incredible and I need you so bad---” 

“Bed!” 

*************

*************

It was always like this. 

Always Wade wondering what he’d ever done to have such a sweet Omega, such a pretty perfect Omega curled up and purring on his chest, wholly content to lay over Wade’s heartbeat and rub his adorable nose over the myriad of scars on the Alpha’s skin. Always one hand resting low on Peter’s hips and the other buried in the ridiculously fluffy hair, breathing in Peter’s pure honeysuckle scent and letting it calm the fire in his veins.

It was always like this, always Peter straddling Wade’s waist and stuck tight on his knot, rocking that gorgeous body just lightly, just enough to keep the Alpha swollen so he could stay full as long as possible. Slim fingers tracing the rougher patches of Wade’s skin, the scars and ruined pieces, then drifting up to coast gently, almost tenderly through the feathers Wade had kept away for so long, and Peter breathed in deep and exhaled slow of his Alpha’s scent as it mellowed from brittle need to caramel thick possessiveness. 

I love you. Peter thought, and he knew his scent must have changed when Wade shifted beneath him and murmured, “Pretty, perfect Omega.” 

It was always like this. 

Always so close to enough but just not quite. 

“Clint invited us to dinner at the compound tonight.” Wade said a few minutes later when he thought his Omega was maybe drifting off to sleep. “You wanna go?” 

“I feel like it’s going to do ridiculous things to your ego if I tell you I’d rather get knotted again than go have dinner with the Avengers.” Peter mumbled, and the Alpha’s wings shook with his laughter. “So I guess we better go. Clint’s been asking for months.” 

“Yeah, he really has.” Wade smoothed his rough palm down Peter’s back and patted lightly at the Omega’s rear. “Should we put some clothes on?” 

“Definitely not. Let’s definitely go naked to meet my personal hero Iron Man and his harem of demi-gods and super soldiers and non powered but still terrifying mates.” Peter yawned and snuggled in closer. “Definitely not putting pants on for that.” 

“Brat.” Wade left a quick swat on Peter’s butt, but he couldn’t help an adoring rumble when the Omega only kissed over his heart. “...I guess we could be pants-less for a few more minutes.” 

************

************

From the outside, the Stark compound upstate looked like exactly that-- a compound. Towering gray walls and not one but two different fences that ensured no one would risk a climb over or cut through without suffering serious electric shock and probably a dangling appendage or two. A deceptively grassy campus with a landing pad that came up from beneath the tennis courts, an underground tunnel system that led to the pools and a state of the art laboratory buried in a bunker that would withstand a nuclear blast. A security system that scanned Wade and Peter not once, not twice but three different times before they even made it through the initial foyer and to the bolted security doors that led to the living areas.  

But past the foyer, past the security systems and uncomfortably prison like appearance, through the windowless hingeless doors that either slid back into the walls to welcome someone or slid shut on their bodies to crush them flat, past one more full body scan that ended with a palm imprint machine that collected fingerprints and most likely a trace DNA sample--- past all that,  the Stark compound transformed into a gorgeous home full of the scent of happiness, of love and affection, and of family. 

“Ho ho holy shit.” Wade breathed as they suddenly stood in an entry way that arched up at least thirty feet, beautiful windows and graceful, artistic architecture lines, and a running length of carpet so plush he sort of wanted to lay in it. “Look at this thing. Who knew Upstate Alzatraz was a posh palace inside?” 

“This is crazy.” Peter picked up a picture from the mantle, wings lifting curiously when he saw Black Widow super spy Natasha Romanoff hanging off of Captain America, laughing and clearly drunk, wearing a ridiculously sequined tux for what was apparently the ball dropping party in Times Square the last New Years Eve. “This is Natasha Romanoff drunk with Captain America. This one is Air Force Colonel James Rhodes wearing the worlds ugliest Christmas sweater. Here’s Tony with the Winter Soldier and uh--” 

The Omega peered a little closer at the picture, “The prettiest baby I’ve ever seen, look at her Alpha, she’s adorable.” 

“That’s Maria, the prettiest girl in any room anywhere in the world, and the tiniest thing capable of bringing Iron Man, the former Winter Soldier and an actual God of Mischief to their collective knees with one gummy smile.” 

Pepper Potts was ridiculously pretty as she hurried towards Wade and Peter, her pale pink wings surrounding her like a halo as she reached to shake first Wade’s hand, then Peter’s. “Honestly, it’s almost embarrassing. She rumbled in her diaper the other day and then laughed about, and I thought Loki was going to faint. You’ve never seen a Trickster God fumble to magic up a camera and take a picture so fast in your life.” 

“Right.” Wade wasn’t sure if he was dumbfounded because of the unexpected information, or dumbfounded because Ms. Potts was just so elegant. “Sure that’s-- yep. Trickster god, cameras, that all makes sense.” 

“It doesn’t make sense.” She corrected with a quiet laugh. “But stick around and you’ll see Lo and Bucky and Tony going absolutely ga-ga for Maria isn’t even the most unbelieving thing to happen on any given day with our family. Now come along, it’s just about time for dinner and you still have to meet everyone, come on.” 

The beautiful Omega turned around on sky high heels and hurried down the hall towards the rest of the compound, and Peter and Wade trailed along behind her, eyes wide as they took in the myriad of family pictures on the wall, the intricate AI system control panels set out on a platform by a set of stairs, and as they neared what was apparently the dining room, Peter reached for Wade’s hand nervously as they drew closer to an astonishing amount of noise coming from behind the huge double doors. 

“Don’t be nervous.” the Alpha sounded nervous even as he pressed at Peter’s palm. “It’s fine. Clint invited us, the apparent Queen right there seems to think we’re welcome so--” 

“Any friend of Mr. Barton’s is welcome in our compound.” came a voice from the ceiling, and Wade instinctively grabbed for a gun at his waist, Peter instinctively clamped his hand down on the Alpha’s wrist so Wade wouldn’t fire at the hidden speakers, and Pepper turned around with a knowing smile and comforting trill of her tongue. 

“Ah, sorry about that. JARVIS is just as much a part of our family as everyone else and if you aren’t listening for the click before he speaks, it can be quite startling.” 

“Mr. Wilson I suggest you think twice about a weapon.” the AI continued, and the Alpha immediately put both hands up to show that he had reached for the non existent weapon purely out of habit. Peter had insisted on no guns and Wade never told his Omega no about anything other than heat, so he was here gunless and the AI needn’t need worry. 

“The last person to pose a threat to my family died in quite horrible fashion, and in the time since my systems have been upgraded to be un-over-rideable.” JARVIS intoned, and Peter turned wide eyes towards Pepper, who only lifted one slender shoulder in a shrug. “Rest assured I will decorate these walls with you and your mate should you think to bring any danger those who reside here.” 

“When Clint extended the invitation, he was very adamant that neither Mr. Wilson nor his Omega mate would bring a weapon to our home.” Pepper assured the AI. “But thank you all the same, J.” 

“Christ.” Wade had to work hard to get his wings down by his shoulders again, the instinct to shove his Omega behind his back and outright challenge the machine for inadvertently threatening them hard to ignore. “I thought robot butlers were supposed to be polite, not homicidal.” 

“JARVIS’s algorithm allows him to change and adapt to new scenarios that present themselves and with this family, a new scenario presents itself daily.” Pepper typed in a code and the double doors swished open. “With the recent addition of Baby Maria, the soon to be addition of Baby James and our Omega Clint so newly expecting, JARVIS is picking up on elevated stress levels from our Alpha and adjusting himself accordingly. He sprayed Thor with fire extinguisher foam the other day because the God of Thunder has one volume setting-- loud-- and Baby Maria was napping.” 

“The AI sprayed the God of Thunder with foam because the baby was napping?” 

“Tony has an Allowable Decibel Protocol and Thor is in constant violation. It wasn’t the first time he was sprayed and it won’t be the last.” Another one of those shrugs, and Pepper adjusted her always perfect hair and smiled, sweeping her arm out to encompass the dining area and living room of the compound. “Welcome to our home, gentleman. You’ll have to forgive our chaos, I’d say it’s unusual, but it’s really really not.” 

“Uh--” Wade raised non existent eyebrows as an absolute beefcake of a blonde strode with golden wings strode by with a wing-less scientist at his side. “Sure?” 

“Thor.” Pepper reached out and snagged the blond’s arm and tugged him back. “Thor, come here and meet a new friend of the family.” 

“My Lady Pepper.” Thor was massive, purely Alpha from the incredible golden wing span to the lightning flashing in his eyes, but he was downright delicate as he bent and kissed Pepper’s hand. “How are you today?” 

“Wonderful, darling thank you.” Pepper turned a little pink, then motioned to Peter and Wade. “These are friends of Clint’s-- the Alpha Wade Wilson and his mate, Peter Parker.” 

“The one even Hel rejects, and the child with webs!” Thor nearly crushed Wade’s hand in an enthusiastic shake, his greeting for Peter quite a bit gentler but just as boisterous. “Of course! Our Omega Clint spoke highly of you! You must meet my love, Bruce.” 

The huge wings flicked out and just lightly brushed against the scientist, who came forward enough to just nod at the two of them. “Mr. Wilson.” Bruce adjusted his glasses and took a closer look at Wade’s skin, then turned to Peter. “Mr. Parker. Tony showed me the video footage of your abilities. If you don’t mind, I’d love to ask you some questions over dinner.” 

“Sure.” Peter was staring even as he took a step back into his Alpha and sheltered beneath Wade’s tattered wings. “You’re Bruce Banner.” 

“Ah.” Bruce cleared his throat. “Yes, I am Bruce Banner. The uh--” 

“I’ve read every paper you ever wrote on gamma radiation theory and particle physics.” the Omega blurted. “and when I first got my powers I actually used one of your equations to measure the absolute mass of my strength considering my relative size to that of several different spiders and the potential effects if could have on my metabolism and regeneration abilities. Your study into meta humans and mutations as a force of nature and not a mistake is incredible. I know you don’t tour and teach anymore, but now that you’ve set up virtual classes, I’ve subscribed to as many as I can afford at a time. You are incredible.” 

“Indeed, my love is incredible.” Thor’s feathers flicked forward again, but this time it was towards Peter in gratitude, a hand over his heart and head bowed in respect to Wade as Peter’s Alpha so the gesture wouldn’t seem flirty. “I tell him in Asgard he would be worshipped as a deity of intellect, but he refuses to return home with me to find out!” 

“It’s nice to be appreciated for more than ah--” Bruce adjusted his glasses again and sent another curious look towards Wade, his expression dimming towards empathy and sadness when he saw the ruined wings. “For more than my ability to level an entire city. Welcome to our home, Peter and Wade. I look forward to further conversation.” 

“Thor, is there any word on when the Queen Mother will arrive?” Pepper queried, and the Alpha shook his head, let his wings out so they rested gently over Bruce’s shoulders. “I am trying to prepare, but to be honest I’m not sure how to prepare for the queen and goddess of Asgard and her Valkryie guards to touch down here in the compound.” 

“My mother will arrive when she decides it is time to arrive.” Thor declared. “She was raised by witches, and her grasp of time eludes me. She knows the exact moment Steve will require her healing, and that is when she will arrive.” 

“You’re no help.” Pepper sighed and blew them a kiss, then grabbed for Peter’s hand and pulled the pair further into the room. “Tony is absolutely beside himself with excitement to meet a Valkyrie. I’m still wondering if I’ll have to have a stable built for a Pegasus!” 

“Right.” Peter sent his Alpha a disbelieving look. “A Pegasus. That’s normal.” 

“Oh Bucky, my love!” Pepper waved and switched directions. “Come meet someone new.” 

“Oh I think Bucky and I are fine knowing the people we know.” the Omega that spoke for the former Winter Soldier was shockingly beautiful, pale skin and jade green eyes, long black hair and a tunic cut clear to their navel. A deep voice and near sneer on ruby red lips, but oddly enough their expression was full on adoring as they stared down at the chubby baby in their arms, waving their right hand above the baby’s head to make snowflakes dance in the air. “Why would we want to meet anyone else when our entire world rises and falls with this beauty?” 

“Be nice, Lo.” Former Winter Soldier and 1940′s super soldier Bucky Barnes was all soft smiles for Pepper, his left arm gleaming as he reached to pull her into a hug and accept a kiss from the other Omega. “We gotta teach Maria to be acceptin’ of others, you know that.” 

“I know that I will raise her to be treated as a Queen and to accept nothing but pure adoration from the lesser, unwashed masses.” Loki sniffed, but their multicolored wings raised high in interest as they looked Peter and Wade over. “You must be Clint’s friends, then?” 

“Where is the ol’ Bird Boy?” Wade wanted to know, quickly cataloguing any danger present in the two potentially volatile Omegas and just as quickly deciding that neither Loki nor Bucky were going to make any threatening moves. “He invited us up and now he’s nowhere to be seen?” 

“M’sure he’s up with our Alpha gettin’ spoiled.” Bucky pushed shoulder length hair out of his eyes and tucked dangerous looking wings back out of the way before he shook Peter’s hand, and then Wade’s. “Good to know you. Clint talks about you alot.” 

“All bad I’m sure.” Wade joked, and the big Omega’s eyes flickered with something almost irritated before he answered, “Nobody talks bad about anybody here.” 

“He was kidding, Omega.” the newcomer to the conversation was one Beta Natasha Romanoff, tiny but unbelievably fierce, red hair and snow white wings that she brushed over Loki, over Bucky and then extended warily in welcome to Peter and Wade. “The Alpha was only kidding, weren’t you Wade?” 

“Natasha.” Wade had ran into Natasha once or twice, events that usually ended with him getting his ass handed to him courtesy of the most terrifying ballerina in the world. If he hadn’t loved Peter so damn much, the Alpha was sure he’d be head over heels for the notorious Beta. Hell, maybe he was head over heels and judging by the smirk of Natasha’s perfect mouth, she was well aware. “Uh, sure I was kidding.” 

“Pretty Omega.” Natasha’s smirk slid into a genuine smile as she opened her wings further for Peter, and the other Omega opened maroon feathers in a greeting as well. “Welcome to our home. The twins are excited to meet you, Pietro is crawling out of his skin ready to have another boy to talk to. Your company will give poor Wanda a break, she wants to dote on Clint all the time and Pietro is hilariously terrible about sharing any sort of attention.” 

“Twins.” Peter repeated. “Right. Wanda and Pietro Maximoff--” 

“--Barton Stark.” she finished. “And if you think the house is chaotic now, just wait till the Queen Mother arrives with her Valkyrie guard.” 

“Yes, Natasha is very excited to meet the Valkyrie, aren’t you love?” Pepper’s suppressant muted scent lightened with teasing and happiness and Natasha play growled at her, ducking in close to kiss her full on the lips and murmur, “Never as excited as I am to kiss you, darling.” 

Bucky just smiled at the display and with one last wondering look at Wade, led his Omega partner and Baby Maria away to find a place to eat. 

“Pep, glad I found you.” Before Natasha had even pulled all the way away and before Wade or Peter could ask if the Trickster God and former Winter Soldier were honestly raising a baby together, United States Air Force Colonel James Rhodes came to join them. 

The Alpha was a sight to behold decked out in military dress, royal blue wings held high as he bent to kiss Pepper on the mouth just as enthusiastically as Natasha had. Wade sent his Omega a curious look, and Peter just shrugged a little, but his smile stretched wide as the air soaked with happy Omega scent and protective, content Alpha as the Colonel rumbled something soft and sweet to Pepper. 

“You’re leaving before dinner?” Pepper asked when they parted, and James sighed through an explanation of, “I have to run. I’m supposed to be halfway across the country right now, and I got caught up trying to help Tony string light in Baby James’s room. I’ll be home again tomorrow.” 

“We spent all day yesterday stringing lights!” Natasha threw her hands and wings up and the Colonel only laughed, “Apparently they weren’t the exact right shade of not quite white, so Tony ordered more!” 

“Of course he did.” Pepper sighed and patted at the Colonel’s arm. “Alright love, I’ll see you tomorrow. Text me tonight.” 

“Of course.” Rhodey straightened back up, sent Wade a quickly discerning look but didn’t so much as tense up before offering Peter a smile. “Sorry to run out like this, I usually like to be home whenever someone new comes along but the world needs saving. Another time, Mr. Wilson. Mr. Parker.” 

“Colonel.” Wade snapped a salute just because his days in Special Forces had left some deeply ingrained habits. “Another time.” 

Pepper watched with an endlessly fond smile as Rhodey hurried out the door, and turned back to Peter and Wade with an expectant smile. “Shall we move on? This is only half the family.” 

“So this is normal chaos for you?” Peter finally asked as they picked seats out at the huge table, and the other Omega just scrunched her nose and nodded. “So what’s un-normal chaos for you?” 

“If you come by next week, you’ll find out when Frigga arrives.” Pepper reached for a bottle of wine and passed it to Wade to open. “She insisted on coming to be there for Steve’s labor and delivery. Baby James isn’t Thor’s child, but since that Alpha is hopelessly in love with the Captain, he’s been just as bad as Tony with fussing and preparing.”

“That was an insane sentence.” Peter said slowly, scooting his chair closer to Wade and snuggling in under the Alpha’s wings. “You know that’s an insane sentence, right? Thor the demi-god’s mom the Queen of Asgard is coming to help with Captain America’s baby even though it’s not Thor’s baby, it’s Iron Man’s baby and also, Bruce Banner the Hulk hangs out too?” 

Pepper muffled an understanding smile. “Just wait till you meet everyone else. That isn’t even the weirdest sentence you can say about our family. Not even close.” 

And the beautiful Omega certainly wasn’t kidding. 

Dinner in the oversized dining room was the sort of crazy that usually only happened in holiday comedy films, with everyone reaching over everyone else, a truly insane amount of food and an even more insane amount of desserts. 

The almost comically pregnant Steve was doted on by Thor, by Bruce, by Tony and Clint, and then Clint in turn was doted on by Natasha and the gorgeous Beta Sam, Tony and Bucky, who kept turning to make sure the mercurial Loki was settled and happy and playing with Baby Maria who was being snuck sweet treats by no less than half a dozen people, including the astonishing twins Wanda and Pietro and an elderly gentleman the twins affectionately called grandfather. 

The Alpha Tony was handsome enough to make both Peter and Wade sit up and take notice, and even though the massive wings flickered curiously in Wade’s direction, Tony had nothing but smiles and welcoming words for the newcomers before he moved on to see his family. 

The entire event was overseen by Pepper who quickly and efficiently dished out plates, made sure there was always a wine bottle open and plenty of water and juice for the expecting Omegas and in between doing everything, she also managed to answer each of Peter’s questions about their family, and also to assure Wade that they weren’t intruding, honestly this wasn’t even a full house for them yet, they should see it at Christmas time. 

It was wild and chaotic and homey all at the same time. Almost overwhelming with all the combined scents but almost unbearably cozy too. Wade couldn’t hardly breathe through the scent of so many Alphas, but the sugar sweet contentment from the Omegas and the balanced but happy Beta’s lessened the deluge until he could finally relax his shoulders and take a few bites. 

Peter was fascinated by it all-- by the expecting Omegas and their over attentive mates, by the way everyone looked to Tony for answers and approval while the family Alpha himself looked to all of them for guidance and opinions and help. 

There was so much laughter, ringing around the room as they ate from each other’s plates. There was so much love, showing through every interaction and quick smile. And more than that, what brought Wade to almost uncomfortable and uncertain, wings fluttering and eyes flicking red if he wasn’t careful-- 

-- there was so much acceptance. So much acceptance and adoration between everyone at the table that it was almost too much. 

Wade had been shunned his entire life, first by his abusive father and then by society in general when his tendencies ran towards feral. It had made him an excellent soldier but after Vanessa and after the accident that ripped his mutation out from beneath his skin and tore his wings to shreds, Wade was only an excellent monster, used to hiding in the shadows and turning away from too prying an eye. 

He didn’t hide from Peter though, and when Clint finally did see them and came running over to excitedly sign through an also spoken conversation, Wade thought maybe he didn’t have to hide here either. 

There was just so much acceptance and it showed through in thousand different touches between the family members. No one shied away from Bucky’s dangerous wings or silver fingers, no one looked twice when Loki magicked a knife out of mid air to cut the baby’s food into smaller bites. Thunder literally rolled around the room when Thor laughed at something Steve said, and in the same motion the huge Alpha shifted only the barest bit closer to Bruce who clearly was mostly touch averse. 

Pepper was wearing suppressants, Natasha’s eyes flared wide in a moment of panic when wine spilled blood red on her hands but Sam grabbed a napkin and cleaned it up before kissing her gently, and where Clint lay snuggled up against the family Alpha, he kept one hand lightly over the blue reactor sat in Tony’s chest. 

They were a family of misfits, of odd edges and unwanted souls but here gathered in the dining room there wasn’t a single person out of place. 

Incredible.

“There’s room here for you and your mate.” The Alpha Tony found Wade sometime after dinner when everyone had helped carry dishes away and then the entire family made its way to the common area to relax. Wade was still brooding, still watching every interaction with narrowed eyes, his shoulders set and wings tense as if he was just waiting for the pin to fall, the other shoe to drop, someone to snap and start a fight because isn’t that what family’s did?

“If you’d like to stay, I mean.” Tony finished, and the other Alpha tore his attention back from watching the room. 

“Tonight?” Wade couldn’t help shifting a step away from Tony, tucking his wings in closer out of habit and pulling his sleeves down a little further on his wrists. “Uh, thanks. I’ll think about it.” 

Tony’s dark eyes flicked down to track Wade’s movement, then warmed in sympathy and before Wade could wonder why, the Alpha pulled his own shirt down a little and showed him the devastation over his sternum and around the bright glow of his arc reactor. “You know, one thing you’ll figure out pretty quick about this family is that we are all scarred. We’re all messed up one way or another but we don’t have to hide, alright? I’m sure there’s more years than I can imagine of you hiding your skin or keeping your wings away from people, but you don’t have to do that here.” 

Wade’s eyes flickered red uncomfortably, and Tony shook his head. “I don’t mean to put you on the spot or anything like that, but my Omega mate Clint told me quite a bit about you and your mate and I just want you to know, you don’t have to hide here. Pepper might do that thing where she gets nosy and overly helpful and tries to find the perfect lotion to help with your skin, and Natasha gets super protective over the more vulnerable people in our family, but the last thing anyone is going to do is judge or stare or--” 

Tony waved his hand idly. “--or anything like that. Thor’s mother Frigga is considered a great healer, he already suggested maybe she might help if you want. If you want. Or if your mate wants.” 

“Peter isn’t--” 

“I used to try and figure out how to change my feathers back to their original colors after my accident.” Tony continued on, brushing off Wade’s token denial. “But my Omega mates practically rioted over me changing anything about how I looked, so I let it go. They wanted me for who I am now, I’m sure Peter is the same way with you.” 

“Uh--” Wade just kept staring, cos out of all the things he’d expected from dinner with the Avengers in their cult-compound-thing, full acceptance and quite a bit of warmth from Tony freaking Stark wasn’t really it. “---okay?” 

“You still look sort of shell shocked, and I get it. We can be a lot to take in.” the other Alpha said mildly, then smiled and motioned to where Peter was talking excitedly with Wanda and Pietro, and laughed out loud when Pietro let his electric blue wings out and Peter fell off the couch in shock. “And I know Peter has his Aunt May as family, but I’m serious. You and your mate are welcome here. There’s room, plenty of room and if there isn’t room, I’ll just build on. It’s not a problem.” 

“Th-- thank you.” Wade said slowly, and this time he meant it. “I dunno how I feel about your team, but I know Pete really wants to give this whole thing a try. He always complains about being a lone web slinger, so we could give it a shot. And at least if we start coming around, you guys will look out for him if anything happens to me.” 

“According to the most recent rumours, nothing can happen to you.” Tony cocked a knowing eyebrow and Wade shrugged it off. “Along the same subject lines, I heard you and your mate caught a bus today.” 

“Peter caught a bus.” Wade corrected. “I was just there to look pretty.” 

Tony chuckled softly. “That’s how I feel half the time with my family. I feel like I’m only dangerous with my suit on, but everyone else is incredible. Even the non super powered members of my family are super heroes in their own right.” 

And then softer, the Alpha’s scent warming with adoration, “It’s humbling to realize our mates could literally choose anyone in the world as theirs, and for some reason, they chose us.” 

“Yeah, I hear that.” Wade ran his hand over his bare scalp self consciously. “Feels like that every day with Pete.” 

“Clint says you don’t refer to Peter as your mate, but I noticed you haven’t really corrected any of us who assumed and Peter didn’t seem to mind.” Tony raised his wings curiously. “Should I spread the word that you have a preference?” 

Wade nodded, then shook his head, then hunched his shoulders and cleared his throat, cleared it one more time before he managed to ask, “How uh-- how did you know it was time to make your bond official with your Omegas? I know you’ve got something with everyone in here, but your Omega mates specifically. How did you know it was time?” 

“I don’t know how much you know about what happened to me in Afghanistan?” Tony paused, and Wade shook his head. “Well it wasn’t great. I went overseas one man, came back a different man and it took a long time to feel like myself again. I knew it was time to bond with my mates when I looked at them and saw home. Bonding with them was like Coming Home, and that’s how I knew it was right.” 

“Coming home.” Wade repeated. “That easy?” 

“It was that easy.” Tony said emphatically. “The day I looked at them and felt like I was home, I knew it was time to bond with them. Everything else after was just making it all legally official. Adopting the twins, drawing up beneficiary paperwork-- details. It was about finding our broken edges and fitting them together and calling it home and then everything was alright.” 

“Huh.” Wade thought back to how broken he’d been after Vanessa, how his wings had shredded, his skin destroyed as the mutation progressed, how the darkness had crept in tinted red at the edges of his vision--

--and how meeting Peter had been like sunshine and fresh air and like home in the middle of a storm he used to pray would kill him. 

“But.” Tony reached out and put a friendly hand on Wade’s shoulder, not shying away from the dark feathers, not flinching over the roughness of the other Alpha’s skin beneath his shirt. “You and Peter are clearly soul bonded, so there’s no rush. That Omega isn’t going anywhere, it’s obvious in the way he looks at you, the way his scent changes.” 

“Soul bonded.” Wade tried for a smile. “Never thought I’d be taking mate advice from Tony Stark.”

“Trust me when I saw weirder things have happened.” The other Alpha raised his wings in response to Sam calling for him. “Think about what I said, alright? There’s room for you and Peter here. Clint knows and trusts you, and I trust him to only bring the right people to our home, so consider yourself welcome. I mean it.”  

Welcome. 

Home. 

Acceptance. 

The later evening found Wade in one of the recliners in the huge common area, his Omega half asleep on his lap as a movie played quietly in the background. 

Tony’s unorthodox family was scattered all around the living room-- Pepper tucked into a sofa with Natasha, pink and white wings mingling affectionately. Thor took up an entire couch with Steve on his lap and only a few of his feathers resting on Bruce’s leg. Wanda and Pietro sat on either side of Clint, signing through their conversation and teasing each other like only siblings did. Tony was already asleep with his head in Sam’s lap, the Beta’s wings spread protective and close over the family Alpha, while Bucky and Loki lay on the floor so Baby Maria could crawl between them and babble and wave her fists at the television. Yinsen was working on his tablet, Colonel Rhodes was the reason Pepper’s phone kept lighting up with text messages, and the entire room was full of the scent of family. 

Of home, of acceptance, of mates and love and open adoration. 

It was…. beautiful… in a way Wade hadn’t expected to find, and the unexpected beauty gave him the courage to nudge his Omega just lightly, just gently. 

“Wade?” Peter blinked those big eyes up at him, shifted so his maroon wings covered them both a little more. “What’s up? Are you ready to go?” 

“No.” Wade swallowed hard and brushed his rough fingers over Peter’s cheek, melting to his very soul when Peter turned his nose into his palm and purred sweetly. “But um-- I’m ready.” 

“Ready.” Peter repeated. “Ready for what?”  

“I’m ready.” the Alpha pressed his thumb purposefully into Peter’s bonding spot. “Ready.” 

“Oh.” The Omega’s honeysuckle scent flooded with pure happiness, and his voice was whisper soft as he answered, “I’m ready too Alpha my Alpha. Always.” 

-- and across the room, Pietro elbowed Wanda sharply and hissed/signed, “Does this mean I have to listen to bonding sex through my wall!? Their room is right next to mine! It’s not fair! I won’t get any sleep at all!” 

Wanda put her head in a pillow to muffle her laughter, and Pietro just crossed his arms and huffed at her. 

This family was crazy. 

*************

Chapter Notes: 

It’s general canon that Peter Parker Spidey can lift between 10-12 tons easily, and a standard sized school bus weighs about 12 tons so that’s why I chose that particular scene. That and the scene in SM: HC where Peter complains about Tony treating him like a kid and Ned is like “you are a kid” and Peters like “yeah, one that can catch a school bus!” I just thought it was funny. 

I will never not love Wade seeing whole hearted acceptance and unconditional love and finally realizing “I am deserving of this” and I will never not love Peter being so happy and willing to give Wade absolutely everything. 

Also HEY Let’s talk about literally terrifying Jarvis! I feel like he’s been getting more and more human in my stories lately and I regret nothing. If this Tony was going to design an AI to protect his family, I don’t think issuing threats about blowing baddies’ brains out would be that out of character, yes? Yes. 

SAY SOMETHING ABOUT THE FIC!

***************

@ships-galore @ceealaina @izziebladez @cwar1864 @hausoffro @tonystarkisanangel @multishippinglife @girlnic @iam93percentstardust @paranormalmoonlight5 @igotloki @moosette05 @wayward-student-philosopher @kaz-brekkers-gloves @atomicfandombomb @1fuckingshitup69 @agentlokii @livewire28 @tulipsnbigcats @kimstark @alex-stark-rogers @bibbarnes @heeeyitskay @goindownshipping @quietgayguy @nanita90a @justaniche

[gintokisimp]

Whatsername Chapter 2: Extraordinary Girl

More Angst and more Pain. This chapters theme is the song “Extraordinary Girl” by Green Day

Genre: Angst, Romance, Pining

Rating: M

Word Count: 3,568

She's an Extraordinary Girl In an ordinary world

The sun had already gone past the point where it was possible for it to shine it's rays into the city. The faint golden beams reflected on the metallic structures of the ceiling. It would have been a beautiful day, if it wasn't for the strange atmosphere and the deep, heavy clouds forming over Yoshiwara.

A womans delicate arms rested on the railing of a simple balcony in the middle of the shady town, right above a small shop and a busy street.

Beautiful, silky blonde hair was brushed behind her ears on one side and falling loosely over a noticeable big scar on the other half of her face. Her amethyst, dull eyes were fixated on something in the sky only she could see.

Suddenly, a rift that was the color of crimson formed in the dark clouds, shining the last light of the day down on her. The first raindrops hit her illuminated face, steadily growing into a heavy downpour drenching her white kimono decorated with an expensive flower patterns.

Despite the depressing weather, as if nothing mattered in a town of endless desire, an equally big flood of people roamed the busy streets of Yoshiwara.

The courtesan of the suns eyes flickered from the sky to the ground below over the horde of bodies, roaming over the busy streets beneath her. The colors of the vastly different individuals mixed together in her blurred sight, creating an almost homogenous mass of flesh and fabric.

Minutes went by without much change. The woman almost appeared lifeless to anyone daring to take a look up to the balcony.

By late noon, the sky had darkened up and turned the buildings of the town into lifeless gray tones. Only the buzzing electric lights faked a world full of wonders and salvation.

The skies split, a loud rumbling opened the gates of hell.

On days like these, she had weak moments. They invited her mind to spiral down the paths of sorrow.

Humans can have weak moments full of despair. It was ok. But still, it felt like she gave up everything that she had worked so hard on. She didn't want to feel like a woman desperately clinging to a man whom she couldn't reach.

The damsel in distress. The weak princess waiting for the prince to safe her.

That wasn't her.

And she can't seem to get away

The chains of Yoshiwara ceased to exist. They ceased with the death of Hosen, yet no one was really free.

She wasn't free.

She had other responsibilities that she couldn't escape from. Responsibilities she didn't want to escape from. But still, sometimes she felt like running away. Disappearing like he did.

Hinowa forced her to take a day off. Since he left, she had worked day after day. Tsukuyo had dressed well for the day. She wanted to go out, but she couldn't bring herself to leave the room. Her fear of someone catching her weakness kept her inside the house.

But everyone already knew how fragile she was.

She thought she had accepted that he would never love her back. She thought it was enough for her to know he was well.

And right now, she just wants him to be back home, wants him to be happy.

Without her.

She could live with that.

But knowing he was gone, she could not live with that.

A faint image of permed white hair in the crowd caught her attention. Without a second thought, the muscular women leapt over the railing, dashed through the mass, and made her way to the image she saw. Her heart was beating in her throat, tightening it to an uncomfortable degree.

But there was no one there..

The person she thought she had spotted was never there.

A hallucination.

He wouldn't come here.

Tsukuyo remained standing in the pouring rain. Lightning brightened the sky, but she didn't move an inch.

It has been two years. Get over him already.

Her eyes turned up to the silver clouds grazing the skies, mirroring the mess that was corrupting her heart. The heavens cried and so did she.

Heavy rain mixed with her tears, dripping down her porcelain skin.

No one could tell she was crying.

To the surrounding mankind, she was just a courtesan standing in the rain, probably waiting for a customer to take her away, take her to the promised paradise.

Would he still remember her if he ever came back?

He won't come back.

Her fingers touched her pinkie.

He lacks the courage in his mind

He dreamed of her every night.

Holding her Hand.

Holding her in his arms.

Sometimes she fed him Dangos with the warmest smile on her face.

The samurais body was completely drained of energy, yet it desired her deeply.

He dreamed of her hand touching his bare chest.

Her underneath him.

He wanted to hold her, hold her until he died.

Waking up was pure horror.

Dreaming was pure torture.

Sometimes he didn't sleep just to escape the feeling, staring at the dark sky, restraining himself from thinking at all.

Like a child left behind Like a pet left in the rain

Another sunset painted the sky in the most beautiful colors, drenching the giant rock beneath the fully shed tree in red shades. The crickets had stopped their singing, no wind was rustling through the trees, no sounds we carried over the dream like scenery.

It was silent.

Silent, like something went missing along the unstoppable movement of time.

The rock was empty.

No wood scratching over stone was heard, no silver hair was seen in the peaceful landscape.

Instead, slow steps carried a samurai through the streets of a small, lively town. Not paying attention to his surroundings, with no clear goal in mind, he stumbled through the clusters of people taking up the street. Nothing really caught his attention, but driven by hunger he subconsciously aimed in the direction of a small inn.

Unexpectedly, olive blonde hair in a familiar hairstyle passed him and he tensed up.

Tsukuyo.. Tsukuyo

The head he was focused on turned and revealed an old woman. Of course, it wasn't her. What was he thinking.

His limbs gave up and he landed on his back. Sulking in pain, he closed his eyes. The loud noises around him echoed in his head, but one voice was particularly obnoxious.

"Young man"

Gintoki opened his eyes and they met with and old wrinkled face. His throat was too hoarse to speak, he hadn't used it in months.

"What's wrong, are you okay?" His eyes only stared back at the man, uninterested in what he was saying.

"Everything okay?" The man asked again with a more worried tone.

Gintoki didn't reply.

"Get up young man, come with me, you look like you need some care." The man lightly shook his shoulder and Gintoki sighed before hesitantly getting up on his shaking feet. He was friendly and something made Gintoki believe, he was not allowed to say no to this old geezer. They entered the small Inn. It was packed with the towns residents, but the man led him through the masses, up a staircase into a hallway of private rooms.

"Go and take a shower and come downstairs when you're ready." The man said warmly, opening one of the doors.

"I don't have money" Gintoki replied.

"You don't need money. I can't let you meet your family like that"

"What family"

The man inspected him and replied after a long pause.

"I know they are waiting for you. You can't run away from them forever. You shouldn't meet them in this state."

"Why"

"In this town, we help each other and I'm sure you can do the same."

"..I hurt her" Gintoki whispered, ignoring what the man had said.

"You can drink and eat today if you promise me to meet her." And with that, he closed the door. Gintoki was left alone in the room. Still unsure about what was happening, he undressed and let the water stream run down his battered body. The water washed away his thoughts and he felt his body welcoming the change of sensations.

I don't deserve this.

There wasn't a lot of time spent in comforting silence. It came back faster than he wished.

Minutes later, he sat down at a table. No one dared to sit close to him. The old man brought him a full meal and Gintoki ate it voraciously.

After some time, a young woman sat down next to him, sheepishly looking at him, eyeing him with great interest. She would have been beautiful, if he had the eyes for that.

"Do you have a home?" The girl asked Gintoki. "Where do you live, I can take you home" She added suggestively.

Nowhere.

"You can sleep at my place" She whispered in his ear. "You're a handsome man, I can make you feel better" The woman placed down her hand on his, touching his ring finger.

Make you feel better.

Only one woman could do that, and she wasn't here.

Only one women was allowed to touch him like that.

Only this one women taking over his whole mind could make him feel better. Touching him in places that were eternally reserved for her. But she would never touch him.

She wasn't here.

She wasn't here by his side.

She will never be by his side.

The Samurai ripped his hand from under the woman's tight grip. His eyes glancing over to her, glowing with menace. She looked at him in fear, stumbling backwards before rushing out of his sight.

The Shinigami Tayuu is eternally mine. There was no place for any other woman.

Why did she reject him back then.

Why

If she just had said yes.

Or just... anything.

She's all alone again Wiping the tears from her eyes Some days she feels like dying She gets so sick of crying

All tears had already been shed. There really was nothing left that she could cry about.

Yet, she caught herself crying again.

Her cries had been noticed.

Yet, no one really heard her anymore.

She sees the mirror of herself An image she wants to sell To anyone willing to buy

No one needs a man to rely on. Care and live for yourself.

The champions of women, they couldn't be weak to men. She couldn't be weak for anyone, especially not for him. It was only leading a bad example, displaying a weakness they wanted to abolish. Be strong.

But was loving someone really a weakness?

He steals the image in her kiss From her heart's apocalypse From the one called Whatsername

What's worse than realizing you want something, besides knowing you can never have it?

I don't mind being only yours.

Lies. You belong to no one. You could never belong to anyone.

Loud creaking of wooden floor tiles caught the courtesans' attention. The sound crept in her ears, finally braking her endless stream of thoughts.

Careful, limping steps made their way in the direction of her door.

Or were they hesitant?

She's all alone again Wiping the tears from her eyes

Somedays he feels like dying

The sweet, burning liquid wetted his parched throat. Every inch of his body, every single cell revolted against the intruding poison, making him feel alive and close to death at the same damn time. It was his first cup of sake, but it intoxicated him like a whole bottle.

"More" he demanded. The old man who's name he had never asked for looked at him with worry in his eyes. Gintoki ignored that.

"Who's gonna pay for that, country samurai?" A mischievous voice bickered from behind him.

"Who're you calling a country samurai, ehhh you wanna fight?" Gintoki blurted back. Without waiting for an answer, he leaped from his chair and dashed in the direction of the voice. His fist made contact with a stubbly face and he smiled satisfied. A whole group of intimidating looking men stood up and gathered around Gintoki.

It was over in mere seconds.

The men were scattered over the floor, Gintokis hands covered in their blood.

It wasn't the alcohol that made him act like this.

He had disappointed the people that tried to help him. Again.

Suddenly, the room shifted. Everything reeled around him and his whole body tingled.

I need fresh air.

He stormed outside and stopped, leaning on a broken lantern.

Gintoki gasped sharply for air and his sight darkened.

Breathtaking sunrise loomed over a huddled silhouette, outlining the man holding a dead body in his arms. The morning sun reflected in the lifeless amethyst eyes.

Blood.

Blood everywhere.

Blood on the soft fabric of her Kimono.

Blood tinting her blonde hair red.

Blood on the tanto he held. The tanto that stuck out of her throat.

Its your fault.

Gintoki blinked and the vision was replaced by a different one.

The swirling mess in his brain turned into a hospital hallway filled with fog. Clean. Too clean.

Aggressive smells desperately tried to over stench the smell of death.

"She's going soon. Do you want to... ?" Asked a bodyless voice. It led him through a plain looking door. Big bouquets of red roses were placed around a hospital bed, obstructing the view on the patient. Floating closer, his eyes caught short white hair framing a thin face. The scar on her face was unmistakably. Her face had sunken in, but she wasn't old. It was something different.

"Gintoki,..'s that you? You're back.." Her white clouded eyes couldn't focus on his face.

"Tsukuyo, there's one thing I never told you." His hoarse voice echoes through the foggy room.

His hand reached out for her face. Black markings covered them, contrasting heavily with the pale skin. Gintoki touched her cold face and her lips formed words he couldn't hear. He leaned closer to understand them.

But he never needed to hear them. He knew them and he himself couldn't say them.

He cried.

Their lips met

and Tsukuyo cried her last tear.

Before he grasped what had happened, the scenery changed quickly.

A sunny day, a cup of sake in his hand, wooden railing under his finger, the smell of tobacco in his nose, a balcony in a familiar underground district.

He turned his head and saw her smile. Her beautiful smile.

Whether it's spring or winter, if I can be next to you like this once in a while and blowing poison gas in your face, that's enough to make me happy.

The way she looked at you. She loved you and it was killing her. And you were never able to reciprocate it.

Drenched in sweat, struggling for air, his left hand clawing a pole, stars dancing over his vision, his eyes focused on his strained limb.

The long gone strand of silky, olive blonde hair on his ring finger blazed his flesh.

It burned his skin crisp like an insect lost on a summer heated street.

It easily set his arm on fire like the small, unimportant dry twigs in a fire pit, spreading to his heart, causing an unbearable pain with every muscle contraction.

She had tied it on his ring finger herself. She deliberately chose to tie it there. Carefully placing the loops, lovingly knotting it.

A quick glance and he knew it.

She meant it.

He thought about all those things time and time again and still denied it.

Nothing else belonged there. No one was allowed to touch him there. Only her hair.

The promise they made to each other.

Don't die

The promise he made to her.

Yubikiri Genman

Gintoki tied his own strand of cursed white hair on her pinkie, knowingly, making the lovers promise. To her. Only her. Only her.

うそついたら uso tsuitara (if you say a lie)

I'll never leave you.

針千本飲ます hari senbon nomasu (I'll let you swallow a thousand needles)

I'm eternally yours.

指切った。 yubi kitta. (and) cut (my) finger.

She tied it on his ring finger... his ring finger. His ring finger.

And I broke the promise.

His soul died when he left Edo.

I broke the promise.

I left her.

You don't love her. You're alone. You just don't want to be alone. Stay away from her. She just makes you feel better about your miserable life, you don't love her.

Because you don't destroy people you love.

Gintokis body revolted. Leaned onto the lantern, he threw up. It felt to him like throwing up his long-lost dreams, throwing up his hope and throwing up his reasons to keep going. He had left all of those things in Edo anyways.

His shaking hands reached out, grasping for support. But there was no one to help.

No one to hold onto.

No one to aid him.

Even if she was there to carry him, his blood covered hand were in no right to reach out for her tender fingers. Reaching out for someone's hand is coming close to reaching out for their soul. Tsukuyos soul was so clean and pure, touching her would only corrupt it and doom her endlessly.

What happens if you constantly hurt someone?

They love you less. After a while they start to forget that they loved you at all.

I hope she's happy.

Happy without me.

I hope she didn't suffer.

You know she suffered and it's your fault.

It's all your fault.

Your fault.

His legs gave in and his back collided with the hard soil.

Somedays it's not worth trying

Crashing to the ground, his only line of sight that was left, was the deep night sky.

And there she was again.

The moon.

Above him, shining on him, taunting him, scaring him, mourning with him.

His ears caught the sounds of a small squad of men, probably the same ones he picked a fight with earlier that gruesome evening.

"He's totally wasted, easy target for us" He heard them mumble. The first face obstructed his fixation on the moon. A primal wrath began to rush through his veins, he hadn't sensed this instinct for a long time, wondering how his body still remembered this sensation.

Don't obstruct my sight.

Flooded with pure fury, the Shiroyasha watched them take their next move.

And they scrambled in fear.

Once again, the heavenly body brushed his silver hair, bathing him in silver light again, illuminating the tears rolling down his face.

Crimson eyes stared directly at the moon, battling for dominance with an inanimate object.

It was soothing. It was reassuring. It was like a silent pact.

He wasn't afraid of the moon anymore and what was to come.

It's worth trying.

The broken samurai dragged himself to his feet, in his new-found purpose of collecting the parts of his soul and body he had believed as lost. They were never lost, he just left them with someone. Someone who was so important to him, he couldn't form it into words.

Gintoki slowly stumbled his way back to this rotten town.

She had his heart.

Reality could only keep him away from her for so long.

Somedays it is worth trying.

Now that they both are finding

Tsukuyo.. I'm coming..wait for me

She gets so sick of crying

He's coming back, I believe in him. I want to tell him the things he missed, when he comes back.

The footsteps in front of her door stopped.

Hinowa.. please..

.. I don't want to talk.

She's an Extraordinary Girl

[221bshrlocked]

thought you were mine (1)

Pairing: Bucky x Reader (ABO Dynamics)

Words: 4921 (not even mad about it)

Warnings: Smuuuut. Pining. Some form of angst. Really dirty dirty talk.

Summary: Your heat arrives unexpectedly and Natasha isn’t around to help you like she usually does. What happens when another alpha gets a whiff of your scent and some lines are crossed?

A/N: I know I have been away for so long and I am really sorry. I don’t know why I have no motivation but I promise I’m trying. I decided to just write whatever comes to mind even if it is shitty just so I get the crap writing out of my system and then I could get to the good writing again. There will be either one more part or two more parts.

You tapped out for god knows what time in the last ten minutes, shaking your head at Natasha when she stood up with a grin and helped you off the ground. She tried to tell you how she got the upper hand this time, but you brushed her away, wobbling to your drink before sinking to the ground and drowning in the cold liquid.

“If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you’re distracted.” She snatched the towel from your hand before sitting next to you, dabbing her neck and reaching for her own drink.

“You don’t know better then.” You growled back, turning away from her immediately when you saw her raise an eyebrow at you.

“Careful omega, or we’ll give those agents something to talk about.” She smiled at you before taking in your facial expressions, grunting when you looked to the ground and ducked your head to the side, silently giving her your submission before struggling to stand up. She followed suit and patted you on your shoulder, turning to the other end of the gym when she saw where your attention was focused.

“Why am I not surprised?” She whispered before taking her things and walking towards the group of alphas and grinning when one of them left almost immediately.

“What’s wrong with him?” Natasha pointed at Bucky, maintaining eye contact with him until he went back to his weights.

“You know very well why he’s avoiding you.” Steve whispered right back, shaking his head when Sam raised his hands as soon as Natasha crossed her arms at the tone. “Come on you know she’s not my type Steve.”

“I know that, and Sam knows it, and pretty much everyone in this compound knows that! But you somehow, randomly, always find a way to have her submit to you in front of him and let’s be honest, that’s not something you’d want to see from the omega you’ve set your eyes on in, literally, decades.” Steve angrily stuffed his jacket and water bottle in his duffle bag before wrapping it around his arm.

“Who said I’m doing this randomly?” Natasha chuckled when Sam left, muttering something about not wanting to know what the plan was. Steve, on the other hand, swore under his breath, catching onto what Natasha had in mind. “This is a dangerous game you’re playing Romanoff, and I’m not sure Bucky will like it.”

“He’s obviously too thick-headed to do anything so I’m just giving him the little push he needs. Besides, they’ll thank me later.”

“Don’t get involved Nat.” Steve puffed out his chest, his blood boiling at hearing someone talk about Bucky in such a way. But it was a big mistake to do that in front of subordinates, his nose flaring when the smell of fear clouded his judgment.

“Mind your own fucking business Rogers.” Natasha growled right back, turning around quickly when she heard you running and grabbing her arms to try and pull her away from Steve. She could also smell the hint of fear in the air and took your hands right away, rubbing your wrist slowly and telling you that her and Steve were just getting a little carried away.

“Calm down love, it’s fine.” She wrapped her arm around your neck and pulled you in, nudging your scent gland softly before laughing and turning away. You slowly began to calm down, telling her it was best the two of you leave because you felt light-headed from all the angry pheromones pumping through the air.

She led you out of the gym, turning around just in time to see a very red-faced super soldier throwing imaginary knives at her. She could tell he was about to go into rut and hoped you weren’t able to smell him. You, on the other hand, could definitely smell his scent. It was so much stronger than before and you thought he might start his rut soon but that shouldn’t have been possible. Tony and Bruce had him on strong scent blockers so technically, you shouldn’t have been able to smell that minty scent you’ve grown so fond of in the last few months. But here you were, breathing the sweet aroma as much as you can until you realized it was making you dizzy. A dull strike of pain shot through your stomach and you blamed the alphas almost fighting for it. You needed to leave the gym as soon as possible and the opportunity presented itself on a silver platter when you saw Natasha and Steve arguing.

While Nat was talking to Sam and Steve, you couldn’t keep your eyes off of Bucky, watching him almost lift the entire fucking machine off the ground. Something had made him angry and you wished you could run to him and soothe the pain away, finding it heart-wrenching that your alpha needed to be taken care of and you couldn’t do it. Your mouth watered when you saw his jaws clenching, sweat forming on his forehead & neck and rolling down his shirt. Then he noticed you were staring at him and dropped the weights aggressively, turning around to avoid looking at you because had he maintained eye contact, he would have lost it and pulled you away from everyone. 

Wait, since when was he your alpha?

You brushed the thought aside when Natasha told you she’ll go shower so the two of you could walk around for a bit.

Bucky almost broke the wall when he saw Natasha nuzzling your neck. He wasn’t sure when the two of you started getting this close but he didn’t like it. He didn’t like it one bit. And the fact that you didn’t tell her to stop angered him even more. She could’ve easily calmed you down without getting this personal! As soon as you walked out, Bucky was able to breathe again. He was barely keeping himself together, the smell of iris flowers flooding his brain and making him go crazy. For some odd reason, it was even sweeter when you were at the gym. Maybe it’s because you were sparring with Natasha but that shouldn’t do it. He knew everyone was on scent blockers most of the time. Then again, his sense of smell was heightened when he received the serum. Whatever caused him to be able to smell your scent this strongly drove him mad with lust and anger, and he knew one more interaction with you today and he would be pushed over the edge. So he decided to return to his room and stay there until he made sure he was in the right mind to have a conversation with anyone without wanting to rip their heads off.

Bucky left the gym abruptly, his mind replaying the way your eyes roamed over him as he worked out. But he was imagining it right? Because there was no way you’d be checking him out. You never gave any indication of your interest. Actually, you never even conversed with him for a long period of time outside missions. His rut must’ve made him misunderstand signals. But you smelled so fucking good.

When he realized his nerves wouldn’t calm down for the rest of the day, he stayed inside, going as far as ignoring Steve when he came around to ask him if he wanted anything before he left for an urgent mission.

It was hours later when you woke up after your walk with Natasha. She was doing a hell of a job keeping you calm and collected when Steve called and said there was a mission. You whined and felt horrible but still told her to go. She could smell the lies on you when you told her everything would be fine. It’s not like this was your first heat or anything.

Kicking the covers away from you, you struggled out of bed into your kitchen, grabbing as many cold water bottles as you could before returning to your bed. You asked Friday to turn down the temperature in hopes that the chill air would help but it was only a matter of time before things took a turn for the worse.

A fleeting thought invaded your mind and you brushed it aside quickly, refusing to dwell on it because knowing the state of incoherency you would soon be in, the decision would not be in your favor.

Three floors down, Bucky was pacing back and forth, metal arm whirring and making him angrier because he needed some quiet, but he would never receive it. He kept on thinking back to the morning interaction with you and Natasha, his blood boiling when the image of you nuzzling in her neck was brought back over and over again. He growled at the memory, realizing that he’d need to speak with Bruce and Tony when they return because clearly, their fucking suppressants didn’t do shit.

He was about to grab his phone and call Steve when a whiff of your scent hit him. His body froze. There was no way he could smell you when you were nowhere near. Unless…

“Sergeant Barnes, it appears that Ms. Y/L/N is in need of…medical attention. Her vitals are unstable. Should I call Mr. Stark or the doctors upstairs?” Why the AI chose to tell Bucky this information he would never know.

“How long has she been like this?” Bucky asked through gritted teeth.

“About four hours Sir.”

“Fuck me!”

“I don’t see how this could help the situation Sergeant Barnes.” Friday responded instantly and had Bucky not been on his very last nerve, he would have laughed at the sarcasm.

Not thinking about the consequences, Bucky pushed through his door, choosing to ascend the stairs instead of taking the elevator to calm his nerves before he approached you.

As soon as he was on your floor, his stance wavered. He smelled iris flowers all around him to the point of almost choking on the sweet scent. Before he could walk to your door, he heard your faint whines calling for him from behind your apartment. Bucky closed his fists in an attempt to control himself before approaching your door. He was about to knock when it was pulled open for him aggressively.

And the sight in front of him took his breath away.

You were wearing nothing but a sheer nude camisole that left nothing to the imagination, skin sweaty and slick running down your legs. Your hair was dishevelled, chest heaving before you attempted to take a step forward.

“A-alpha…”

Your legs unfortunately gave out on you before you could go to Bucky. But he was quick, leaning forward just in time to catch you before you fell to the floor.

“Sweet omega,” Bucky whispered before carrying you back to your bed. He could tell you tried to make a nest for yourself but it wasn’t up to your standards. Slowly laying you down, he stepped away and grabbed as many pillows and blankets as he could, placing them around you before getting behind you on the bed.

“Alpha…please, hurts so much. Need you, James please alpha I-” Your little whimpers were music to his ears, but Bucky couldn’t betray your trust, not when you were in no mind to make any proper, consenting decision.

“I know ‘mega, I know doll, wanna help you so fucking badly, wanna make you cum on my cock till you can’t fucking remember anything else…but I can’t. I’m sorry darlin’.” Those were not the words you wished to hear from the one man you’d wanted since forever. You whined, tears rolling down your cheeks as his hands soothed your arms.

“Alpha please…I’ll be so good to you. Don’t you wanna knot me Bucky? I’ll do whatever you want me to do, just- fuck please, please.” You begged and begged but to no avail. Bucky cursed into the night air, wishing he could take you right then and there, but he knew that once the two of you finished, everything would be different.

“Fucking damn it, I’m sorry baby. I’m so sorry. Come’ere.” Bucky turned you around easily in his arms until you were straddling his thighs, the show of strength making a new wave of slick run down your thighs and wet his sweatpants. Bucky couldn’t tear his eyes away from the sight in front of him. You looked so fucking incredible, so fucking ready and hot for him. Knowing he was the one turning you on made him harder than a rock, but he pushed the thought back again.

“Shhh, I know doll, omega you’re so sweet. So wet and beautiful for your alpha huh?”

“Yes, yes all for you. Always for you James.” Bucky made sure he’d ask you about that little comment later but now, he needed to make sure you weren’t in pain. He held you close to him, letting go for a second to take off his sweatshirt before wrapping his arms around you and bringing you flush to his chest. Looking into your eyes, he gave you a warm smile before taking hold of your neck and drawing circles right under your hair, pulling you to his neck until your nose was nudging his scent gland. He noticed your heart rate was slowing down, in return calming him down a bit. He thought he’d have to ask you to stay in his arms but the opposite happened. You wrapped your arms around his back, fingers feeling every muscle movement on the naked skin before you rubbed his scent gland harshly.

Bucky was losing his mind with every pass you made. His hold tightened around your form, his brain refusing to think of your hard nipples brushing against his chest and the impossibly wet sweatpants beginning to flood his boxer briefs.

“That’s it doll, there you go. Just wanna help you out baby, don’t want anythin’ else. Wanna know you’re safe. Is that alright Y/N?” Bucky whispered into your ears, watching your neck like a hawk and sensing your heart rate speed up again. You hummed and nodded, not wanting to distract yourself from the task at hand for one moment. Bucky couldn’t help but chuckle, knowing how hard it must be for you as well. He kept on lulling you and massaging your back, occasionally sliding his hands a little too low or too harshly. You’d moan against him before nudging his gland aggressively in return. The longer you scented him, the hotter you grew. Having an alpha in your arms that refused to knot you was painful but some part of you understood why he wouldn’t go there.

Suddenly, Bucky combed his flesh hand in the nape of your neck, pulling you away from him and not giving you a chance to ask any question before he was mirroring your actions. Keeping his metal hand on your exposed skin to keep you cool, Bucky leaned forward, leaving wet kisses on your own scent gland before nipping at it lightly. He could feel you shaking in his arms, happy that he was the one causing such a reaction from you. He continued to bite and lick your neck, his hold on you surely leaving marks in the near future and the thought of knowing you’d have more than one mark on your body because of him caused him to growl.

You started rubbing yourself on his thighs, nails digging into his skin the needier he became with his actions.

“Such a needy omega aren’t you doll? You wanna cum baby? You wanna show your alpha just how slick that pussy can get? Fuck darlin’ you’re driving me mad. Wanna bury my face in that sweet, wet cunt of yours. Wanna fuck you with my tongue doll, lick you dry and have you drench me. Goddamn omega, you’re so good for me.” Bucky pulled away, holding your waist tightly before flexing his thigh muscles in time for you to rub your pussy on him. Supporting your weight on his shoulders, you looked away embarrassingly, eyes aimed at the ceiling as you continued to use him to get to your pleasure. Some part of your brain registered the fact that he was in control this entire time, not once forcing himself on you even when he was told he could. The fact that an alpha like him allowed you to use him so you could relieve yourself, without even asking for anything in return, was making you emotional and lustful.

“Look at me omega, fucking look at me when I make you cum.” Bucky growled, his voice shaking you to your core and you couldn’t help but obey him, eyes slowly drifting until you met his barely blue orbs. He was somehow as breathless as you, a flush taking over his features and making him look all the more handsome.

“Bucky, Bucky, oh god….Bucky,” you prayed his name with every pass of your soaked pussy over his thighs, mesmerized by how patient he’s been so far.

“Yeah doll, ‘m right here, keep going love, wanna feel this cunt drench my thighs baby. Fucking hell, smell so good, so perfect. So fucking warm and sexy using me to get off. Come on darlin’, cum. Cum. NOW!” James growled the last bit, biting his lower lip when your legs started shaking and you screamed his name as you continued to fuck yourself on his thighs. Bucky puffed out his chest, rolling over until you were beneath him. He was breathing harshly, the new position making him realize he might lose the control on his alpha. Before he could pull away, you crossed your legs behind his back, making him fall against you, his weight making you feel safer. You could feel his cock twitch against your wet thighs and you rolled your hips a few times, arching your back against him and keeping him flush against you.

“Y/N please…I c-can’t, fffuck you feel so good, omega, listen-” Bucky was saying one thing but his body was doing something else. His hips swayed against your naked core, and he was almost ashamed of how he was humping you like a fucking teenager. You both looked down in unison, watching your cunt wet his crotch.

Bucky didn’t mean to look down but as soon as he saw your pussy, something snapped in him.

He pushed off of you instantly, walking away from the bed to the balcony in an attempt to calm himself down and smell something that was not you. He could hear you shuffle behind him and hoped to god you were either putting something on or settling down beneath the covers.

“Alpha…” The moan came out so lewdly Bucky was close to coming in his pants. He turned around to try and tell you that he should leave when he stopped breathing.

“Y/N I think I should g-”

Bucky’s eyes took in your body, now free of the camisole and open for him. He walked around the bed slowly, calculating his next steps wisely as he committed this image to memory. You were on your knees, face against your pillow, hands fisting the covers and ass round and ready in the air.

“D-doll?”

“James.” You licked your lips and watched him fight an inner battle with himself. Bucky wanted nothing more than to pull his sweatpants down and shove his cock in your pussy and fuck you till neither of you remembered the current year. He swallowed the lump in his throat, kneeling down on the bed and grabbing your hips before pushing you on your back. He grabbed his sweatshirt and pushed it into your arms before laying down and pulling you into his arms.

“Sleep doll, you’ll need your energy for later.” You frowned, wanting to ask him why he continued to turn you down but his hold on you only tightened. Bucky continued to stare at the ceiling, pushing his own desire back and urging you to continue scenting him. You obliged, knowing this was probably as close to a comforting-Bucky as you could get. You decided to make the best of these moments, shoving the sweatshirt beneath the covers before wrapping your arm around his chest. You could feel his muscles tense when he felt your nails digging into his skin, relaxing against you as soon as you nudged his scent gland again. Bucky couldn’t help but pull you closer to him when he heard you take a long whiff of his neck, finally relaxing enough to not hurt your feelings any more than he already has.

But as much as he tried, Bucky couldn’t get an ounce of sleep. Not when he felt your skin getting warmer by the minute. You however, had no trouble dozing off, finding the alpha’s presence much more helpful than you thought.

Then your heat decided to kick it up a few notches and you became restless again. Bucky felt your uneasiness before you did, attempting to pull away and see what he can do. He realized his mistake as soon as your eyes fluttered open, a look of absolute need written all over them when Bucky dared to make eye contact. Before he could say anything, you took hold of his metal arm, wrapping it across chest quickly and making sure Bucky couldn’t pull it away. He didn’t know what to do, his lips shivering when he looked down and saw where his thumb was. Bucky’s fingers twitched against the hard nipple beneath his hand, incapable of stopping the small action when it occurred again, this time a little rougher and firmer.

“J-James-” Your raspy voice broke the silence, your own hands laying above Bucky’s and pressing it harder against your breast. “Please. Ple-please James.” The sound of his name falling from your lips had him angrier than ever, more at himself for being in this situation than anything else. You dared to wrap one thigh around his hip, wanting to get any small relief from the alpha in your arms.

“Ahh fuck, doll you gotta stop doing that. I can’t. You know I can’t.” Bucky tried to reason calmly with you but the wrecked voice only edged you on, your hips bucking against his already wet sweatpants. Knowing this would only get worse for him, Bucky did the first thing that came to mind even though the more rational part of his brain begged him not to take this any further. Not caring how rough he was being with you, Bucky took hold of your wrists and flipped your around, pulling your back flush to his chest before sitting up against the headboard with you between his thighs.

“You want some relief doll? Fine, I’ll give you some fucking relief. Open your legs.” He growled against your ear, no longer shying away from touching you. You were so focused on how perfect his metal arm felt against your chest that you didn’t hear what he said.

“Omega, I said…open your fucking legs!” Bucky bit your shoulder, his fingers pinching and rolling your nipples harshly until you obeyed his command. Your legs were shaking in anticipation, eyes looking down at your sweating limbs and watching as he played your body like he was your mate. Bucky didn’t bother to take things slow, a part of him thinking speeding this up would get him some closure. Just one more touch, one more look at your skin reacting to him, one more. He pretended this would help him out, not realizing things were only going to get worse after this.

“So fucking pretty, smell so good doll. Smell like me, fuck I want you. I want you so fucking badly ‘mega. I can hardly breathe baby, can’t think straight anymore. Everywhere I go, I only think about you. How you’d fit in my arms. How perfect this cunt would be choking my cock. How pretty our neck would look with my mark on it. How fucking wet you’d get with just the thought of your alpha having his way with you. God baby I wanna fill you up, breed your fucking cunt so no one would dare come near you. You’d like that wouldn’t you love? Hmm?”

“Oh James don’t stop. D-don’t stop. Alpha please. Make me yours. Make me yours James. I don’t want anyone else.” In a moment of overstimulation, you pulled your neck all the way back until your head rested on his shoulder, presenting yourself for him to have his way with you. Bucky only growled at the pure submission he could feel, biting on your shoulders harder before continuing to rub your pussy. He cupped your breast with his other hand, watching your pussy as it drained the sheets beneath the two of you. his eyes went everywhere, from the way your legs opened up for him to how your nipples hardened with every pass of his fingers against him. He was close to exploding, his cock straining harshly against his sweatpants and making him wish he wasn’t an honorable man.

You kept on rubbing your back against his crotch, the biological part of your brain begging you to reach around and grab him. And when you tried to move, Bucky knew what you were attempting to do, distracting you with switching his actions. His right arm trailed up your body, drenching your skin with your own juices while his left arm descended your hot skin grabbed at your thighs. He wanted to distract you as quickly as possible, coating his metal fingers with your cum before slowly inching two fingers inside your clenching pussy. You gasped against him, looking down and crying out his name when he fucked you relentlessly. Bucky was close to asking if this was okay with you but then he felt the way your walls squeezed his fingers and knew this was probably helping out more than he thought. The cold of his hand was doing wonders to your aching core, opening you up like never before until you couldn’t take it. You came around his fingers, hands trying to grab at anything to keep you sane.

When he didn’t stop, you turned around and begged him, swearing and whispering against his scent gland and hoping he would have some mercy on you. But then he turned you around in his arms until you were sitting on the bed, his fingers still knuckle deep inside of you.

“Fucking look at me. Look at me when I make you cum Omega. This what you wanted right? You wanted me to make you cum? Don’t even know what you do to me…driving me fucking insane. Fuck that’s right. Scream my name. Scream your alpha’s name omega. Fucking looking at me now!” For the first time during that night, Bucky was the one initiating the kiss, his lips devouring your own like he belonged to you as he fucked you with his fingers. You moaned into the kiss, not sure if the tears falling down your cheeks were because of how sensitive you were or the fact that he continued to call himself your alpha yet he refused to fuck you.

When it was all too much, you grabbed his wrist to attempt and slow him down, hands moving to his biceps when he continued to drive you mad with need.

“Ple…please. No more. N-no more.” You were heaving against him, your breaths coming in shallow and quick. He stole one last kiss before reluctantly tearing himself away from your body. Your eyes suddenly felt heavy, limbs incapable of moving on their own. When Bucky saw the state you were in, he smiled to himself, knowing it was because of him that you were like this. Lifting you up slowly, he laid you on the bed again and pushed his sweatshirt near your head. You were about to ask him where he was going when sleep took over from how forceful your orgasm was. Bucky wanted to change the sheets but the sick part of him knew that if he were to try to do so, he’d probably end up stealing the wet sheets and keeping them for himself. Lord knew how hard the past few hours were on him but he still wouldn’t want to disrespect you like that.

He laughed at that last thought. It’s not like he didn’t already cross the line.

Stealing one last look, Bucky asked Friday to update him every few hours in case your heat got worse. And Bucky swore to God the AI was too embarrassed to reply to him but it did so anyway. He left your quarters with an unsettling feeling in his chest, a feeling he did not expect to feel anytime soon. And when he arrived at his room and shut the door, it felt like someone has stabbed his heart with a knife and twisted it to make sure he was in pain. The control he had on his alpha ceased to exist and Bucky couldn’t try to calm himself down even if he tried. He threw his chair across the room, growling into the dark air as the chair shattered through the balcony sliding doors. Stripping quickly, he walked into the shower and turned on the cold water, standing under it until he could no longer smell you on his skin. But he knew that wouldn’t be possible until at least a few days when his scent gland was no longer holding the trace of what the two of you had done.

[thenakedgingerwrites]

Trapped

Needless to say, I didn't expect what happened today. No one ever does I guess. I was working in my garage while the wife and kids were out running some errands. I cleaned out a bunch of things from the attic above the cars and piled the boxes near the front of the open garage. Having gone up and down my ladder with boxes (while not super heavy) all morning left me pretty fatigued and sweaty. It was still the middle of the afternoon and I was hoping to finish up, shower, and maybe jack off before the family got home. Three kids later, the wife wasn't as generous with sex anymore so I re-learned how to take care of myself. Not that I don't miss the passionate sex we used to have, I just gave up on getting a blowjob ever again, sad as it is. I went back up to get the last box but in my fatigue missed a step. I tried to grab a side plank but failed and instead went through the drywall floor. Well, not entirely. I had been wedged in-between two planks since I was pretty triangular of a build. I had a home gym and kept in shape as best I could. A bit of a belly but still strong as ever. So now here I was, stuck halfway through the roof of the garage. I tried to pull myself up but either couldn't get leverage, was too tired, or was stuck on something. Maybe all three. Either way, I wasn't going anywhere. Luckily the way I was stuck wasn't painful but I couldn't move. For whatever reason I yelled "HELLO!?" thinking someone would come to find me but instantly felt stupid for it. The family was gone and while the garage door was open, the boxes blocked most of the view to the street so it wouldn't have been obvious to anyone I'd be lucky enough to have pass by.

If I knew someone was walking by I'm sure I could yell to get their attention (if they didn't have headphones in) but I didn't want to yell for an hour hoping someone would find me. The family should be back within an hour or so. They'll laugh at finding daddy coming through the roof but my wife will get the ladder so I can climb out of here and then chastise me for not paying attention. Sigh. Fifteen minutes or so went by as I hung there. I tried to make a game out of it by counting the rafter beams, or swinging my legs for a light ab workout, but was getting bored. I tried to get out again but determined I must be stuck on something. I wiggled my hips to try and figure out what it was. Something was preventing me from pulling myself up and thought it must be something on the bottom of my shirt or my sweatpants. I thought that if I went down a little lower, whatever was stuck would unstick and then I could pull myself free. It took another couple minutes of trying to squeeze myself further into the hole but finally eureka! I felt something give. It was the undeniable rip of my sweatpants but fuck it, I can always get my wife to stitch them back up. Two things became very apparent to me very quickly though. One, my squeezing further into the hole sealed my fate of actually being stuck. Without the leverage of something beneath me I was staying put. Second, the rip to my pants must have been the waist, and the phone in my pocket weighed them down. And down. And down... "You've got to be fucking kidding me." So now, not only was I stuck in my garage ceiling and my pants ripped, I was naked from the waist down. "Great day to not wear underwear, asshole." Well my wife and kids finding me would be a little less fun this way, for everyone. Luckily my ass was hanging towards the driveway so they wouldn't see my exposed cock and nuts but seeing Dad's hairy ass probably wasn't on their to-do list. I decided to give myself one last attempt at freedom and used all my muscles in my arms I could muster. My legs ran in place attempting to help me but alas, nothing. "FUCK!" I cursed. Last fucking time I clean the attic. I catch my breath as I hear the unmistakable pitter patter of footsteps. "Hello?" a cautious voice calls out. Shit! Of course someone is passing by NOW. "I'm fine, go away!" I yell instinctively. I'm not sure why being rescued is less desirable than a stranger seeing me naked like this. I mean, I'm fit, my cocks a good size (6 hard and pretty thick), maybe a little hairier than most but overall a good looking guy. It's just the shame of the situation. "Ha, you don't look fine." The guy gives a light chuckle. I can tell he's behind me getting an eye full of my round ass. Sigh. "Yeah, I'm not. I fell through while moving some boxes and... fate is out to get me today I guess." "Well one man's trash is another's treasure." What the hell? Did he say this situation was treasure? "Um, yeah. Can you grab my ladder? If that's under me I think I can push up and out of this wedge." Silence. "Hey, guy?" I think I hear footsteps but it's hard to tell. He's probably wearing running shoes so I can't really hear him. Did he leave? *click* The unmistakable sound of a phone camera. "What the fuck man?! Did you just take a picture of me?!" "Yes, only your butt. To remember this laughable situation." "Well I'd fucking appreciate it if you didn't and get me the fuck out of here." I couldn't help my anger starting to boil. It's one thing to be found by a stranger but thinking photos of me could leak on the internet was a different story. "Oh my..." he says. *click* "Dude what the fuck?!" "Sorry, after seeing your dick I couldn't help myself." "You fucking fag!" "And those balls." I felt his finger tips graze my scrotum which set me into a fury. I kicked my legs out at him but there were still bound by my sweatpants. I only kicked air. "Ah, ah ah" the stranger said. "You wouldn't want me sending these photos to everyone in the neighborhood would you?" No, I wouldn't. I calmed my legs down and let them hang limply again. "No I know a way we can both help each other out." "And what's that?" I ask through gritted teeth. "You married?" "And three kids. Straight as an arrow." "Funny thing about arrows, they bend in flight. Anyway, when's the last time you got a good blowjob?" "What?!" "When's the last time your wife gave you a really great blowjob?" "That's none of your Goddamn business." "Ah, I see. When's the last time you had ANY blowjob?" I remained silent. I couldn't think of a good lie but the truth is it had been years. He continued to speak. "You see, I'm kind of addicted to cock. I've become a bit of an expert in my addiction, but it's been a couple weeks since I've blown anyone new." He was behind me now as he placed an open palm on my ass. "So, that's how we can help each other." "You want to give me a blowjob." "Correct." "You want to GIVE me a blowjob, and then help me out?" "Seems like a good deal to you, yes?" I mean, fuck yeah it did. I'm not gay, really I'm not. Unlike a lot of guys in high school I never messed around with any of my guy friends but still, it had been years. And I couldn't see him at all so in my mind I could just pretend it was Scarlet Johansen or Emma Stone or whoever the fuck I wanted it to be. "Is that a deal?" "I mean, what do you need me to do?" "Ideally, just not strangle me with your thighs and I'll do the rest." I did contemplate it, but then I'd be where I started and he may turn violent too. I'm the one in the compromising position. "Okay, deal." "Oh goody!" I felt both of his hands on my ass this time while he planted a big kiss on one cheek. Gross. The stranger pulled something over towards us. It sounded like maybe a one of our plastic storage bins but I'm not sure. I estimated that my cock was probably only 6 feet off the ground but figured he'd need to get a little higher. The first touch was tentative. His hands on my soft cock made me second guess my decision. This was a guy afterall. I couldn't will myself to forget that. This was wrong. And then he took me into his mouth. My abs convulsed by instinct. It was a feeling I'd missed for so long. He sucked and swirled his tongue around my hardening cock and I'm embarrassed to say how quickly I got hard. "Oh wow, you're a thick guy." "Ha, thanks." Wait, why the fuck am I thanking this pervert? Well, he is giving me head... *click* "Hey! No pictures!" "That wasn't part of the deal. And what do you care, your face isn't in them. They're just for me. Promise." "No, seriously. Delete those pic..." He took me back into his mouth and it shut me up. God he was good. This guy definitely had practice with a cock and probably with someone as thick as me because he managed to take almost all of me into him. And like a pro fag, he even popped my balls into his mouth to give my cock a break. While he pumped my wet shaft with his hands he sucked and licked on each nut separately. Taking my cock back into his mouth, his hands grabbed my firm ass from behind. I actually started to rock into him. It felt so fucking good. His fingers snaked their way back towards my ass hole but I stopped him and rocked away, cock popping out of his mouth. "No way. Don't touch my asshole. I'm not gay." "You don't trust me by now? I can make a little prostate stimulation feel really good." "I said no. Blowjob only." "Sigh, have it your way Mr. Boring Married Man." I resented that. Was I really boring because I didn't want to be finger fucked by a guy? A stranger even? He got back to work on my cock and really focused on the head. He was edging me and I knew I wouldn't be able to hold on for much longer. "I think I'm gonna cum soon man." He just continued to work. Nervous he didn't hear me, I said it again. Not sure why I cared to be polite about accidently cumming in his mouth. "Dude, you're about to make me cum. Get off unless you want my load down your throat." He popped off so I figured he finally heard me but unexpectedly he said "feed me, daddy" and engulfed me again. Fuck, this guy was gonna swallow too. I felt the pressure building and tried to hold it back. Once I got to the peak I felt his finger once again find my asshole but not timidly. This guy shoved his finger fully into me all at once and I kid you not, it was the best feeling of my life. His finger deep into my ass, cock in his mouth, balls in his other hand, I exploded. Rope after rope I shot into this guy's mouth. It'd had been a while since I jacked off too so the amount must have been immense. The waves of euphoria were unlike anything I'd ever felt sexually or otherwise. I actually moaned out loud like a pornstar. I always thought they were faking it until now. A long slurping sound later, he unsuctioned himself from my defeated dick. "I take it you liked it then?" "Fuck..." was all I could get out between breaths. "I hope you don't mind, but I'd like to finish too." "Umm, I'm not sure what that means." "Don't worry, nothing gay for you Mr. Straight Married Man. I'm just gonna jack off real quick looking at that cock of yours." "Ugh, fine." I was still spent and had no energy to argue. I just had the best blowjob of my life and was soon going to be free from my embarrassing prison. I heard the ladder, I think, being dragged over towards me. Did he finish already? I tentatively reached a foot out for it but found only air. "Um, guy?" "I'm not done yet, sheesh. Hold your horses." I soon heard the sound of a guy jacking off. He got handsy with me but I decided to just bite my tongue, wanting him to finish as fast as possible. It didn't take him that long until he warned me, "Okay, here it comes." I wasn't expecting him to cum onto me, and I definitely didn't expect him to come on my ass! "Dude!? What the fuck!?" "Ahhhh, that felt amazing." I'm pretty sure he slapped my ass a couple times with his still-hard cock. "Fucking gross man!" "Sorry, couldn't resist. That ass is to die for. Sure you don't want me to fuck you too?" "I'm FUCKING positive!" I yell. "Whoa, whoa, okay, okay. Thought I'd ask." "Well the answer is fucking no. Now bring that damn ladder over here so I can wipe this shit off me." "Okay, okay. One last photo though." *click* "Stop!" "I couldn't help it, I needed to get a picture of me marking you." Like a fucking dog? Marking me? Little did he know, when I got out of here I was gonna get him and break that fucking phone. I imagined he'd run when he gave me the ladder but I was fast. "Whatever man, just bring me the ladder." "I actually don't think that's a good idea." "What the hell!? We had a deal!!" I was furious. I started to flail my legs, my semi-soft cock slapping against my thighs. "I know, I know. But I don't think you're going to be too kind to me when you get free. And I'd much prefer your wife to find you like this. Another guy's cum on your ass." "YOU FUCKING MOTHER FUCKER!!" "Well, Daddy fucker maybe." "GET ME DOWN!!" *SLAP* He slapped me hard against my right cheek. "Until next time stud." "GET BACK HERE!!" I writhed and wiggled for a few minutes, fuming with anger. After a bit longer though, I determined he had gone. I again was trapped with no hope of rescue. And honestly, no desire for rescue now either. As I hang there, remnants of my spent cock dripping to the floor and the mysterious stranger's cum drying on the globes of my ass, I hear our minivan pull up into our driveway. How was I going to explain this...

[donnajons]

Leave Paris, Move to Gotham Chapter 2

So, this is over due, but it’s here and it’s alive! I couldn't  post all the tags, it was a fully mess. Please tell me what you think about. it

It was too late to change her last name.

 Her landlady registered her under that name, so the bills came under that name. Her boss, Miss Prince, wrote her checks under Marinette A. Wayne, and she got a fake ID under that name and her photo. 

But why the last name Wayne was such a bad thing? 

Well, turns out that the last name was well known in Gotham thanks to an eccentric playboy billionaire, whose company hold the 87 percent of the jobs in the Gothic city. At least twenty people asked her if she was related to Bruce Wayne last week. Even Miss Prince asked her if she was one of Bruce’s children. Apparently, the man had adopted a dozen children with black hair and blue eyes like her. 

Well, she couldn’t change her last name, but she had the option of change her appearance. That was one of the reasons why she changed her hair color to a pastel pink. She kept her bangs just to divided in two and hold them with pins, so she could show her forehead. The pink was a good choice. It made her look like a totally different person. The only thing that didn’t match were her black eyebrows, but she didn’t want to dye them too. 

After paying and say goodbye to Selena, Marinette still had more than a hundred dollars in her pocket, and it was still early, so after a whole internal debate and some encouragement from Tikki, Marinette went to a Hobby Lobby and bought a bag of embroidery thread and some needles. She felt guilty when she gave the money to the cashier and walked home with her knew embroidery set. A strong part of her wanted to go back to the store and return the threads, but Tikki was stronger than that part of her. 

“Remember, Marinette. You deserve to have pretty things and hobbies. You can buy embroidery thread and not feel guilty about it. Think of all the pretty pattern that you can sew in your clothes! Tell me one.”

Marinette smilled. What would she do without Tikki?

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 Marinette was nervous, and this time it wasn’t because of Char Noir, the miraculous, or money. 

The Pink haired girl was about to ask her boss if she could use the sewing machine in the back to fix some of her clothes in her free time. It wasn’t that her clothes were ragged. The thing about her clothes was that they were too plain. She bought them in the discount section of Walmart in the men’s and women's section. Some of them were way too big for her, and others were just… not her style. After she came back from the store and checked the miraculous box, Marinette started to decorate her clothes… well the ones that fit her. That’s why she wanted to ask Miss Prince if she could use the sewing machine, so she could fix her clothes. 

It was lunch time, and Marinette was as ready as she could be.

“M-miss Prince.” Her voice lacked confidence even though her boss was kind to her.

A tall woman with black long hair turned around to see her.

“Oh, Marinette. You change your hairstyle! Pink suits you well!”

The girl shyly moved a piece of hair from her face. “T-thank you, Miss Prince. Miss Prince I-I was wondering if you are okay with it, but of course if you don’t that’s fine. I would totally understand, and I don’t want to bother you…”

For someone that wasn’t a native English speaker, Marinette knew how to bladbling like a pro. 

Miss Prince put a hand on her shoulder and said “Hey, breathe. You can’t ask me what you want if you don’t breathe, breath, Marinette, breath.”

And she did. 

“Good. By the way, your English is getting better. You’re speaking more fluently.” Her boss smiled, “Now, tell me what you need.”

Marinette took a deep breath, “I-I was wondering if you could let me use the sewing machine on the back. I want to fix some clothes that I bought, b-but of course it would be in my lunch break and only if you let me.”

Quickly, Miss Prince smiled to her. “Of course, you can use the sewing machine but not at lunch time. You are a young woman still developing, so take your last hour to fix your clothes.”

Marinette opened her eyes in surprise. “B-but, Miss Prince, we have some clients at 3:00. You told me that you want me to take measurements and star the pattern for their suits. I could fix my clothes tomorrow if you let me.”

Her boss choked her head, “And you will, but you will only take measurements. I have seen your work. You are quick and precise when you take measurements. It would take at most ten minutes per customer. The pattern will take you less time. Now, don’t argue with me and eat something.”

As Marinette walked to the back store, she couldn’t help but be grateful for having a great boss like Miss Prince. She was always comprehensive and kind to her like the time she forgot her money lunch. Miss Prince bought her favorite sandwich and didn’t took it from her paycheck. Oh yes, Miss Diana Prince is an excellent boss by caring about her employees, well employee.

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Bruce Wayne was a patience man… most of the time. 

There were just a few things that could make him lose his cool. One of them was getting gala clothes for his oldest sons. Tim and Damian, his youngest, were easy to dress because they had a style. While Tim liked a more classic suit, Damian preferred a little bit more extravagant style and yet elegant. This was what made easy to dress them: they had a good taste in fashion. His oldests, for the other side, had not taste whatsoever. Dick was too extravagant for his own good (If it wasn’t for his father and Alfred intervention, he would be planning on buying a pink suit with falcon feathers. His next son wasn’t better. Jason’s concept of a suit is a clean letter jacket, jeans, and a bow tie. 

There was only one person who could help this fashion disasters, and that person… wasn’t, Bruce.

Diana Prince, AKA Wonder Woman, has a boutique with pretty high standards, and by God’s sake, the warrior was the only one that could tame his sons and at the same convince them to use a fucking tuxedo.

“On other news, there has been another victim from the mysterious serial killer, The Jewel Panther, this time on the city of Nice, France. The victim was a nineteen-year-old Japanese girl and was found on a local jewelry store in the same way the other victims of the Jewel Panther. We recommend all young ladies from the age of thirteen to twenty-two that have Asian heritage, fair skin, prominent freckles, black hair, and blue eyes to take precautions in France and neighboring countries…”

Bruce turned off the radio.

It was bad enough that the league didn’t want to take that case, but to hear it repeatedly was just tiring. The league didn’t consider this Jewel Panther to be a menace worthy of them. He was “too normal” for they, but what could be normal about a fucking serial killer that some how ripped off all the organs from the thoracic are of the victims without making an insertion of any kind just too leave their skin flawless.

That wasn’t fucking normal.

Bruce finally arrived at Diana’s boutique where his oldest sons were waiting for him.

“Finally, you are here. Two more minutes and I was going to leave.” Jason, his second oldest, reclaimed the three men got inside of the boutique. “For somebody that preach about responsibility, you’re late.”

“Knowing that you two aren’t a bit punctual, I told you two to be here by two thirty. You will probably arrive at two fifty. We have an appointment at three.”

“You know I would be offended if it wasn’t true.” Dick said as he sat down on one of the chairs. “So does Diana have the suits?”

“No, she is going to take your measurements to make them from scratch.”

“Do we have a saying on the style” Jason asked without hope because he knew that answer would be:

“No.” Unexpectedly, this answer came from Diana Prince, who got inside the room with a small, very small girl.

“As long as I am alive, you two will dress properly… at least just for the gala. For what you two are wearing, I cannot do miracles.” Diana said as she looked like them like if she was judging their appearances (Little note, she was.)

She got an offended hey from the brothers at what she only smiled.

“This is Marinette. She will take your measurements in the changing room. Marinette can you take them there?”

The small girl gave a shy nod “I-if you could follow me.” She said with a thick accent that neither of the brothers could identify came from. Dick and Jason followed the tiny girl.

Once his sons were gone, Bruce asked Diana “Since when do you hire help?”

“Since the business grow up” Diana knew that tone. It was the I-know-that-you-doing tone.

“Not likely, you like to do your clothes by all yourself. The only people that you have ever hired is a few Amazonians, and she has a French accent. Her physique is not anywhere near an Amazonian.” He gave her the look again. “So, what’s her story?”

Diana signed. He wasn’t the best detective just to don’t live it up.

“It’s good that you bring up the topic because I was going to tell you anyway.” She stood up closer to him “Three weeks ago, she came up looking up for work. You should have seen her. She looked so lost and even thinner than she is today. She told me she needed a Summer job, but by Artemins’ sake, she looked like she was starving for weeks. It was obvious that the money was for food and a place to sleep.” She bit her lip. “Her story had holes like how her parents haven’t move from France yet because they were busy or how she couldn’t give me her ID because she lost it in the airplane, but what gave it away was her last name.”

Bruce lift an eyebrow, “Her last name?”

“Her full name, or the name that she gave me, is Marinette A. Wayne.”

Marinette A. Wayne. What are the chances?

Bruce was about to ask when Diana interrupted him.

“I asked her if she is related to you. I mean at the time she had all the Wayne’s characteristics: black hair, and blue eyes. She seemed like one of your children, but she told me that she wasn’t related to you. She didn’t even know who you were until I told her that Bruce Wayne was a rich influence man that basically rules Gotham, which makes it even more weird.”

“There is a lot of people with the last name of Wayne, what would be weird?”

“Because, not offence, but anyone knows that the last name Wayne bring problems in Gotham. Nobody in their right set of minds would move to Gotham having that last name.”

She had a point. The Wayne family had a lot of money and prestige, but they also had an immense number of enemies. Having that last name was dangerous, and more for a teenager without supervision.

“What are your theories about her?” Bruce asked her.

“She is an immigrant, maybe illegal if she didn’t want me to see her ID. Probably from France, her accent gives her away even though she tries to sound Chinese. She is running away from somebody because her parents are not in the picture. She is always alert and ready to hide. I have seen how she shakes and jumps every time something makes a loud noise. She cries in the bathroom sometimes. She is trying to survive, but she can’t do it alone for more effort she tries to put in.”

Marinette had another characteristic of the Wayne family: Psychological trauma.

“You said you were going to tell me eventually, why?”

Diana stopped for a second.

“I’m leaving for France after the gala for two weeks. If the League doesn’t want to do something about the Panther, I will. Those girls didn’t deserve that end, and their sisters don’t deserve to live under all that fear,” For the look on his face, Diana could tell that he was with her on this. “and that’s why I need you to ask you a huge favor.”

She put her hand on his shoulder.

“I need you to keep an eye on her while I’m not here.”

“You want me to babysitter her?” Bruce asked her.

“Not babysitter her, I just make sure that she is fine without letting her know. I will leave Gotham with more peace knowing that you and your sons will keep tabs on her.”

“And what would be the excuse to come to your boutique for three weeks? Another suit?” The trillionaire asked her. He was on board to keep an eye on this girl because somehow this girl reminded him of her other daughters… I said somehow.

“The boutique will be closed, so I’ll give her three weeks in advance and the materials, so she can work from her apartment. I also will talk to her about a mandatory Summer fashion course in Gotham University that will began a week before I go. I understood that your son, Damian, is taking Summer classes there to get ahead. So that would be a good excuse to keep an eye on her. Don’t you think?”

Bruce smirked. Diana was a sneaky woman.

“You planned this pretty well, didn’t you?” 

“I like to be prepared. You better than no one should know it. So, can I count on you?”

Diana offered her hand to him, and Bruce willingly accepted.

“You can go without worrying about her.”

Diana gave him a small smile. “Just please, don’t adopt her before I come back. You have enough children.”

 Bruce was used to this constant running joke about his obsession, as Jason liked to call it, but never tease Bruce Wayne about adopting more children because it would end in him preparing the adoption papers.

“You are very funny.” Diana could swear that she saw a little smile on his face. “Lets go, before my kids start bothering your ward.”

The two of them started walking to the changing room. “I wouldn't be worried about her. Under that shy face, I can see a ferocious warrior. I kinda want to teach her how to fight when I come back.”

“Carefull, you may end up having a daughter” This time she could swear over Athermis that she saw a smile on his face.

Diana just smiled. “That wouldn’t be so bad.”

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Diana was right about her; Marinette was good at taking measurements.

It took her eight minutes to get Dick’s and another eleven to finish with Jason. It could have been eight, but the man was too ticklish and too tall. She had to stand up on two boxes just too get the measurements of the two men.

“Soo, do you like working with Diana?” Dick said trying to break the ice. Noone have something since they arrived to the changing room, well except a few reprimanding words from the little girl with pink hair. 

Marinette finished taking the last measurement from Dick’s waist. She tried not to look at them in their eyes. The less attention she got, the better.

“I-it’s good. Miss P-prince is a kind boss.” She said as she wrote down the measurement on Diana’s notebook

 “How long have you been working with her?”This time it was Jason who asked.

Was this an interrogatory?

“N-not long. Three weeks I think.” 

“That’s good. Does she gives you a discount in the store?” The man with a few white hairs asked again.

“I-I don’t think so. We have never talk about discounts, but she lets me use the sewing machines to fix some oversized clothes and finish the embroidery. She also buys me lunch most of the time and doesn’t take it out of my paycheck. So I guess that’s better than a discount.” She kept her look on the notebook even though she finished writing down on it. 

Dick and Jason shared a look. The way that she said the part about the lunch was, sad and full of gratefulness. Both men look at the girl more carefully. She was thin, at the point that they could see the bones or her hands. Maybe they should avoid that topic.

“You said you put embroidery on your clothes. Are those like the ones that you have on your blouse?” Dick asked pointing at her.

She looked down her clothes. She was wearing an orange blouse with pretty blue patrons on the collar. 

Marinette gave a shy nod.

“Did you used a sewing machine?”

She shocked her head.

“No? Well, I’m impressed. This is a pretty good job. Do you think you can put something like that on my suit for the gala?” 

Marinette’s blood cold down and her heart almost stopped. The idea of disobeyed Miss Diana terrorized her. 

“I-I don’t think that Miss Diana would let me. She already has your suits figured out.” She passed to them the photos of the suit. They looked really formal, elegant, and expensive… and boring for Marinette’s taste. 

“In your opinion, what would you change about the suit. In the hypothetical case that Diana ask you to make some adjustments for the suit.” Dick asked her. 

“I don’t know if I should. I-I may get in a problem.”

“You won’t. That’s the beauty of the first amendment. Tell us your thoughts, Stephanie. It’s not like Rovin Rotten it’s gonna appear.”

Marinette didn’t understood the reference, but somehow it gave her the it gave it the valor to tell what was on her mind.

“I-if was unto me, I wouldn’t change the design of the suits, but rather the materials. Like for example for you uhm…” Marinette pointed at the tallest.

“Jason”

“Yes, Jason, Sorry. I would change the material to a more shining, like the leather jacket that you are wearing, but it’s not actually leather. It’s lighter. And you…”

“Richard, but call me Dick.”

“Right… W-well Dick, I’m t-thinking that you would look good with some metallic blue embroidery pattern on the lapel, and...and the pockets…. But I-I guess the original design is more proper for that kind of gala.“ She could feel how her face redded at the look of the two men.

“You know…” Dick said as he gave her a polite smile… “your ideas are pretty good. Maybe if we tell Diana about it, she could put ‘em on the suit.”

No, what if she gets mad? What if Miss Prince gets so mad at her that she decides to fire her?! How could she keep the miraculous box safe if she didn’t have money to sustain herself?!

“N-no. I-I don’t want to disrespect her. S-she worked so hard in those designs.” 

“Never be afraid to speak your mind if you think that you can improve something” Marinette’s blood cooled again. She quickly stood up and bowed. It was forced habit that she did every time she apologized.

“Hey, Diana. We were just takin’ with your talented girl. She has great ideas.” Jason said.

Diana crossed her arms and gave her a sneaky smile. “Is that so?”

Marinette wanted apologize, but before she could even open her mouth, Dick spoke.

“Yeah, she is talented. Like the ideas she has for our suits. I bet that you heard them?”

The woman nodded. 

“I did, and I think they are really good ideas. You have a lot of future in the fashion field so much that I want to talk to you about a great opportunity to improve your career. We can talk about it after  our guss are gone, which remind me did you finish taking their measurements?”

Marinette couldn't believe this. It was too good to be true. Maybe it was true, and miss Prince wanted to talk to her about something good, but there was also the chance that she wanted to be alone with her, so she could fire her in private and not in front of her clients. 

“Marinette.” She turned at the Diana and the other. Their faces seemed concerned. “You okay?”

She spaced out. She should stop doing that.

“Y-yes, I just got lost in translation. I finished taking their measurements.”

“If we are no longer needed, my sons and I will leave.” Bruce stepped up avoiding to look at the girl to not make her uncomfortable.

“Of course, we will have your suits for the first fit in by Friday.” She and Bruce shaked hands.

Marinette saw his two sons stand up and cme closer to her. Maybe, this was the last time that she would see them again.

“It was a pleasure to meet you Pinkie Pie.” He put his hand up waiting for a high five. “Pss, this is the part you high five me back.”

The girl shakingly high fived him.

“Hey, I want a high five too.” Dick put up his hand, and Marinette awkwardly high fived him.

“Dick, Jason we got to go. Alfred is making dinner.”His sons left the room while saying goodbye to Diana. Then Bruce turned to Marinette to shake her hand. “Miss Marinette it was a pleasure to meet you. I hope we will meet again.”

“L-likewise, Mister…”

“Bruce Wayne, but call me Bruce, Miss Wayne.”

Marinette opened her eyes while open. Bruce Wayne as the Bruce Wayne, and he knew her last name. 

“P-please, c-call me Marinette.” 

The man just smiled and left the room letting Diana and Marinette alone.

So the worst things that could happen today may happened at the end. She may lose her job and get sued by the Bruce Wayne for taking his last name, and lets not forget that she is using a fake ID. Scratch that, she is an immigrant. Marinettes has seen enough news to now that that country is in thin line with immigrants She was in soo many problems.

“Marinette,” The older woman took her purse. “What do you think if we go out for dinner?”

Well… Marinette didn’t expect that.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Marinette couldn't say no to miss Prince. She was just too nervous to reduce the offer.

The restaurant was fancy and expensive. Only the beverage was worth more than three months of rent. The people there were dressed in fancy outfits from Versace to Oscar de la Renta; it made Marinette feel underdressed with her orange T-shirt and cheap jeans. 

“So, Marinette, you told me you are interested in the fashion field.” Miss prince said as the took a sip from her glass of wine. 

“Y-yes miss Prince. I do ever s-since I was a little girl.”

“And what do you plant to accomplish them?”

Marinette froze. What were her plans?

Months ago, she had a prosperous future. She commissioned big pop and rock stars like Jagged and Clara. She won many design competitions from Gabriel Agreste. She was building a name, but now, all her work and effort was worthless. She had to start all over again, but the difference now is that she didn't have the same motivation. Before Gotham, she did it because she has her parents supporting her. Today, she did it to hold to the little sense of normality in her life of chaos.

“I-I don’t know ma’am. Maybe I could start by designing clothes and maybe sell them on Etsy. I h-hadn’t have the time to think through it. Moving here was too time consuming.” The girl said as tried not to shiver. If Miss Prince was going to fire her, Marinette hoped that she did it quickly, so she didn’t have to live with this fear any longer.

Miss Diana put her glass down. “Marinette I’m am gonna be sincere to you. You have talent and dedication. Those two qualities can get you somewhere good, but that can bring you to the glory, to your golden dream is passion. And by Arthemis’ sake, you have more passion than a hundred people together. I have seen how you enjoy creating new clothes and fixing them like if it was a way to get away from everything. That’s why I want you, if you allow me, to support you to become a fashion designer.

Okay… okay.... That took Marinette by surprise. She expected miss Prince to fire her for over speak, not to offer her support. 

“I-I.. Y-you want to help me?”

Diana smiled. “Of course, in fact, I have a proposition to you.” 

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Marinette locked the door of her apartment, put her key pack at her purse, and started happy dancing.

Diana (she insisted to be called by her first name) told her that after the Wayne’s gala she was going to close the boutique for three weeks. While this made Marinette sad because she would have to live from her saving can, what Diana told her next made her really happy. Diana offered her to work with her not for her. 

Here was the deal, for the next three week after the gala, Marinette would be working on her usual tasks but at her apartment while she attended a course about fashion design in Gotham University, fully paid by Diana. At the beginning, Marinette refused telling Diana that she felt that she would be abusing her kindness, but the older woman said that she saw this as an investment. Paying for her education was an investment so Diana and she would sell her clothes on her store under the girl’s name. They both would win. Marinette gets an education, and Diana a new brand for her boutique.

For Marinette this was like a dream come true. In fact, this was the best thing that has happened to her since… well since she defeated Hawkmoth. She will be studying in one of the most prestigious schools of fashion in the world, and if everything goes well, she will sell her clothes at Diana’s boutique, which is one of the most prestigious boutiques in the US.

“I still cannot believe it, Tikki!” Marinette said to the goddess, “this feels like a dream come true!”

The Kwami giggled, “I’m so proud of you Marinette! You deserve this!”

After putting her pajamas, Marinette let her body fell on her hard bed. She smiled like in a way that she hasn’t in the last month. “Tikki, please tell me that this is not a dream.”

The Kwami turned off the light and put a blanket over her body. “You aren’t dreaming, but you should do it soon. Diana wants to hear your ideas for the suits tomorrow morning.”

Marinette closed her eyes while she smiled. For the first time in a long time, she felt that she could just fall asleep and worry about nothing.

“Hey, Tikki?”

“Yes, Marinette?” The kwami said as she lay beside her hodder’s shoulder.

“Thank you for everything.” 

The kwami gave her a kiss on her cheek. “You don’t have to thank me for everything. You deserve the best.”

Eventhught her apartment was cold, sink in the kitchen dropped all night, and her neighbors screamed like if they wanted to kill each other, Marinette felt more at peace for the first time in ages… 

Sadly this wouldn’t last long.

@cyborgcandy 

@mikantsume @cyborgcandy @northernbluetongue @mystery-5-5@livpc @serina-leigh @tazanna-blythe @blue-peach14 @justarandomtumblerblog@fantasticfourintraining@indecisive-mess-named-me @xxmadamjinxx @ captainmac6 @luckysouleaglenerd@sidefrienda@mindfulmagics @komaedasnatched @adrienne7698@akira-daiyamondo-suta @raingirl0135@kittyotakunoir666 @a-cat-with-a-knife l@thebananathatwrites@howtoshuckatlife @dolph1nch1ca1@spicytacos @re-side-this @emocinamonroll@mystery-5-5 @spicybelladonna a @salladanne @mjisntme @lunar-wolf-warrior @tazanna-blythe @yin-390 @constancetruggle @celestiacq @laurakinneylance @roseinbloom02

@literallytryingmybestbutok @ellerahs @felicityroth @liawinchester67 @octoberscorn @eliza-bich @chrismarium @captainmac6 

[fullmetalscullyy]

Hey, for your Royai collection... how about one where Riza gets really strong menstrual cramps at work and Roy is all worried, running around to make her comfortable and getting her warm towels to try and ease her pain?

aw thank you for this anon!! worried and attentive roy is always a good roy uwu

Riza stood from her desk chair and fought the impulse to wince. She’d managed to hide it well all day so far, the boys didn’t have a clue about her pain and discomfort. There were only thirty minutes until lunch then she could escape for an hour and take some medicine… Or put her head down on a table until the cramps passed… Yeah, that sounded like a better idea.

Movements controlled, she approached the Colonel’s desk with no hint of discomfort on her face. “Here’s the report, sir.”

“Thank you, Hawkeye.”

“Is there anything else you need me to do before lunch?”

“No, however, I could use some company out to lunch, if you’re willing?” He raised an eyebrow in question. “General Grumman has asked me to travel outside East City to run an errand for him. In order for the task to be done before the day ends, we’ll need to leave during our lunch hour.”

Oh god, please no.

“Of course, sir. I just need to pop out the office for five minutes, then I’ll be ready.”

“Just go now, if you like,” he dismissed with a pleased smile. He probably thought this would be a great afternoon but Riza could honestly think of nothing worse. She didn’t want to travel while her stomach was cramping up a storm. She just wanted to remain in her desk chair. It was comfortable there. Riza had discovered if she sat just right, then there was no discomfort for a few minutes. She managed to gain a reprieve. One slight shift would set it off again, but at least she could breathe easily.

“Okay. Thank you, sir.”

Walking out the office it felt like his eyes were boring into her back, especially after she picked up her purse before leaving.

Sitting on the closed toilet seat, Riza rested her forehead on her hands. They were clasped together tightly, squeezing each other as she tried to stave off another wave of pain in her abdomen.

God, she hated being a woman.

Holding herself completely still, Riza waited until the medication took the edge off her pain. It had been longer than the five minutes she’d initially stated she’d be, however Riza didn’t care. Not right now. Feeling slightly feverish, she sighed and rubbed her forehead gently to try and distract herself.

Fifteen minutes later, Riza exited the ladies bathroom. The pain had subsided somewhat – it wasn’t as intense as it had been before – but it still lingered. Sometimes it simply refused to shift unless she had a nap. Apparently today was one of those days.

“Ready?”

Riza jumped as Mustang snuck up on her. Scolding herself, she nodded. “Yes, sir.”

The car drive to the station was silent. He flicked through a file, brow furrowed in concentration, while Riza stared out the window at the passing scenery to try and find any way to get her mind off the pain. Their driver – a young private – drove without asking any questions or making small talk, which she was thankful for. It would have just irritated her, and that would be unfair to the young man.

Again, her movements were slightly stiff and controlled as they walked along the platform at the train station. East City station was as busy as ever. Families greeted each other and bid tearful farewells. Children dashed in between the two soldiers, almost causing her to trip, which caused pain to shoot through her abdomen as her body jolted unexpectedly. She did visibly grimace this time, and she was sure the Colonel noticed. He never mentioned it, however, just simply placed a hand on her lower back to guide her inside the train carriage. Blessedly, it was empty. The door banged closed and she was grateful for the sudden silence.

“In here,” he murmured. The pressure on the small of her back increased, steering her inside a private cabin. Riza sat carefully on the bench, thankful they’d finally stopped moving. Normally, movement and exercise would help, however she’d always had issues with her period. Sometimes it would be fine while others would leave her struggling to even remain upright. Today was one of the latter.

“I’ll be back in a minute,” the Colonel announced, closing the sliding door after himself and leaving her in the silence of the cabin before she could ask where he was going. Laying her head back, Riza took the chance at peace and closed her eyes.

Movement jolted her groggy brain back to reality and her eyes flew open. The world sped past them outside the window in a green blur. They were already out of East City, which meant she’d been asleep for at least half an hour. Something slid from her shoulders and fell into her lap. Looking down, she saw a blue military jacket in a heap on her thighs, and there was a waft of a very familiar aftershave.

“Did you sleep well?” Mustang asked her, not looking up from the file he was observing. Riza stared blankly back at him, realising he was just sitting there in a white shirt. His sleeves had been rolled up to his elbows, revealing his muscular forearms. When she didn’t reply, the Colonel lifted his head expectantly, a soft smile on his face.

“Sir, I –” She stuttered, unable to believe she’d let herself slip like this. His head cocked to the side, awaiting her answer. “I apologise, sir. It wasn’t my intention to fall asleep while on duty –”

The Colonel dismissed her with a wave of his hand. “It’s quite all right, Hawkeye. I know you haven’t been feeling that great since lunch. Mind if I ask what’s wrong?” His expression turned to once of concern. “If you don’t want to tell me, I understand,” he quickly backpedalled.

“Ah, no, sir.” He was no stranger to her time of the month. He’d been witness to how much it affected her when they were teenagers. Roy had held her hair back as she vomited into the toilet more than once. “It’s just…” She sighed, swallowing her soldier’s pride and admitting her weakness. “It’s my period, sir.” It was embarrassing to admit in a professional setting, however the Colonel had known her since she was a child. 

He straightened, nodding in understanding. He’d leaned forward expectantly while he awaited her answer. “Ah, I see.” Silence descended on them. Her cramps had let up slightly after her impromptu nap, however every now and then there was a twinge in her stomach. When unexpected, it made her flinch. “I’ll be right back.”

The colonel rushed out the train cabin before she could argue. Again. Sighing, Riza left him to it, knowing that no matter what she said, she wouldn’t be able to put a stop to whatever plan he’d suddenly cooked up in his head.

When they were younger he’d always rushed around to try and make her feel better. Once he’d left for the military that had obviously stopped, and he hadn’t done it since. He’d never needed to, because Riza had mastered how to hide in her adult years. Today, however, her body wasn’t playing ball and her insides were wreaking havoc with her life and ability to perform her job correctly.

Damn it, I know I’m not pregnant, body. Leave me alone.

It felt like her womb was screaming at her that she wasn’t pregnant as another cramp hit her. It was like a harsh reminder that she’d failed to create a child. Sucking in air through her teeth, Riza exhaled forcefully. She wished it wouldn’t scream at her. Probably every woman wished that. A letter in the mail would be nice. Just a gentle reminder that she wasn’t pregnant, instead of her body ripping itself apart in announcement.

Ten minutes later the Colonel returned with a hot water bottle in his hand.

“Where did you get that?” she asked in disbelief.

“I have my ways,” he grinned mischievously. He chuckled at her suspicious look. “This is a sleeper train and the staff very kindly lent me it for this afternoon.” Riza felt her stomach drop at the thought of him declaring that he had an ill Lieutenant who needed it. “They think I get extremely cold feet,” he whispered conspiratorially.

She was touched. “Thank you, sir.”

“Don’t mention it. Do you need anything else? Painkillers? Tea?”

Riza shook her head. “I’ve already taken something. If you wouldn’t mind though, a tea would be really nice right now.”

Roy grinned. “I’ll be right back!”

Riza smiled to herself as she placed the hot water bottle underneath her jacket. The warmth spread over her stomach and it wasn’t lost on Riza that even after all these years, he’d remembered what worked best to soothe her cramps. She rearranged Roy’s jacket to lay over her stomach, covering it from view. However, she needn’t have bothered, because the curtains for the cabin had been closed to hide a sleeping Lieutenant from view from other passengers and staff. Another soft smile graced her features. He could be so thoughtful.

Even though she didn’t need his jacket now that she was hidden away, Riza kept it in place. Every so often she’d get a waft of the smell that was wholly him – his aftershave mixed in with the smell of burning and ash. It was an extreme comfort and one she wasn’t ready to part with just yet. Plus, she was ill. She was allowed this small comfort just once.

When he returned with a piping hot tea and a bar of chocolate her smile only grew.

"I got one of those hot towels as well. First class sure do have it good." The sliding door closed behind him. "I… don't really know what you'd use it for, but I thought I'd bring it anyway. I hope it helps…"

Riza took her gift from him, feeling warmth spread through her body, and it wasn't from the hot water bottle pressed against her stomach. Bless him, he looked so worried about her. "Thank you, sir. So much."

He grinned back at her. "Don't mention it."

[themostcleverandwittyname]

Curiosity Saved the Cat

CH1 CH2 CH3 CH4 CH5 CH6 CH7 CH8 CH9 CH10 CH11 CH12 CH13 CH14 CH15 CH16 CH17 CH18 CH19 CH20 CH21 CH22 CH23 CH24 CH25 CH26

(Jumin x MC)(Saeran x MC)

Summary:

MC is fairly happy after Jumin proposes to her, however, her curiosity leads her to contact the hacker that started it all.

Chapter 16:  So Edgy

Chapter 16 on AO3

For two days she sat in complete silence. The sound of pages flipping, rapid typing, and the tinking of ceramic mugs being placed on the desk were all that she had heard and it was driving her insane. Today varied from the past two days, however, because she was asked to go and make the coffee this time.

This was the first time that she was left unsupervised to wander freely through the building. She knew that she did have a time limit, cringing as she recalled how harshly Saeran told her to not to lollygag. Still, it felt nice to be able to just walk. As silly as it seemed, walking felt amazing after being cooped up and hunched over a book and small laptop. Her situation had changed somewhat for the better since being his assistant.

The very word left a bitter taste in her mouth but at least she was now treated with something equal to basic human decency. She got fed nicely and under Saeran's order, Believers would bring in beverages. They had not spoken much to each other and he was constantly ignoring her. Not that she cared, but the atmosphere was always dismal in that “office” of his. Myung couldn't lie to herself, she was learning something from the books. Her captor did pull himself away from his work sometimes to demonstrate a lesson that she had a hard time understanding. It took a lot of skill and focus and her thoughts turned to Seven. She had a newfound admiration for his talents.

She made her way into the kitchen area that buzzed with quiet conversation among other Believers. From being here, she had learned that there was a somewhat hierarchy among the Believers. Saeran was on the top on the hierarchical structure, under the Savior as her personal dog. He did everything she said and was highly regarded.

Being his assistant meant that she immediately was considered above the other Believers. That wasn't necessarily a good thing.

She kept her hood lowered over her face as she made her way to the coffee pot, praying that no one noticed her. She had been told that she should wear her robe when she went into the main halls to avoid aggression from the others.

“Hey!” some voice rang out behind her causing her to startle and spill a drop of coffee on the countertop. She decided that ignoring the person would be best. Another voice murmured to the aggressive one in questioning. To respond, the man stated loudly.

“Yeah, that's the one that hasn't been cleansed properly. She hasn't fully gone through the ceremony. She has no place here.” Myung didn't turn around and didn't visibly acknowledge the buzz of confused and angry whispers of the kitchen dweller. Instead she simply grabbed a handful of cream cups and sugar along with a spoon and crammed them into her robe pockets. With both mugs in hand she barely cast the robed figures a glance as she turned on her heel and began towards the door.

Unfortunately, one of the more aggressive believers wasn't going to let her get away easy and grabbed her robe sleeve. Coffee dribbled to the floor as her sleeve was tugged back. She then decided to stop ignoring the agitated man.

“Don't touch me! This coffee isn't for me.” She decided to take benefit from being Saeran’s assistant. “You don't want me to tell Saeran that you're bothering me, do you? He’s busy enough without having to deal with you. Now, excuse me.” She harrumphed and shook her arm loose. The cup with the least coffee would be hers then.

This didn't seem to scare the Believer like she had hoped. He followed her out the door and into the living space. The people that were standing in groups or lounging around immediately turned their attention to the disruption.

“Don't act so high and mighty, you don't deserve that position! You're just the RFA’s rat!” she clenched her jaw and stopped her in her tracks. No, it's not worth it . With many eyes burning into her, she reluctantly started to walk and ignore the man again when he grabbed her good this time, sending it falling off around her shoulders to reveal her face and hair. She had enough. She didn't care how much trouble she got in. She turned towards the man with full intent of dousing his ass in boiling hot coffee.

Before she could swing her arm back, a hand was rested on her shoulder. She stopped to glance behind her. It was another hooded figure. She wasn't sure if she was being attacked or helped by the person behind her so she jerked her shoulder from the person's touch, trying to steady the coffee. A familiar and comforting voice told her that she had been saved by a friend.

“I'm Believer A306. The Savior had something to ask you, we need to go meet her immediately,” the voice stated before directing his voice at the attacker, “If there are no other disturbances, then we must be going.”

“Oh, of course. I'm sorry to be a bother.” The man said, his tone passive aggressive. Thank god that she hadn't had the chance to toss coffee on the man. Saeran would have been pissed and she would had caught hell for it.

Myung quietly agreed and watched as he pulled her away from the dumbstruck man. The familiar person pulled her into an empty hallway. The dull candle light flickered over the navy curtains, even so early in the morning.

“Thank heavens for you, Jihyun. I tried to ignore him but he-” she was cut off when the man in front of her shushed her. She silenced herself to listen to what he had to say. He was her only gateway to the outside and she longed to find out if he had told the others where she was. Was he going to deliver news that they were working on a way to help her? She felt excited and anxious simultaneously as she stood there. Hopefully, he had done the right thing.

“Myung, I sent the coordinates of this place to Luciel however…” the man looked down at the ground, his turquoise eyes avoiding hers, “He's having a hard time with his other work right now. The deadline is so tight that if he doesn't get it finished on time, the agency will...well…” he trailed off but she knew what he meant. The agency would make him disappear, like he has briefly mentioned before. Her heart sank and she struggled to ask what was in her mind.

“So… I have to stay here longer?” She questioned, her voice heavy with disappointment. She saw the man nod but found another way “Why not you just get me out of here? Are you still planning on staying here?” her face twisted with confusion and hurt.

“I...I have to. I have to stay here to keep an eye on her. I think she still may change.”  his voice thick. He was barely able to read the confusion on her face with his poor eyesight, “Rika, I mean. I can't leave here.”

Myung pressed her lips together while thinking. There was silence as she calmed herself. At first, she wanted to yell at the man in front of her and demand to be brought home. She only knew from experience that further prodding would cause him to sputter an excuse and run away just like he did in the chatrooms, like he did in the dungeon before. She wanted to tackle this carefully. From what Jumin had said, V was very fragile right now.

“Did you at least tell the others? Did you tell Jumin in the very least? Please don't tell me that he still has no clue where I am?” her voiced still leaked the emotion that she felt despite tried to keep it inside. The teal haired man took a deep breath.

“Jumin… is not doing well. He knows that Luciel is working towards finding you, but he doesn't know where or how you are. If I tell him, it will hurt him more to know that you are here. I'll just get Luciel to get you a soon as possible. Just play the part here and lay low.” Jihyun said and she anticipated that he was going to say more, but there were voices from the other end of the hallway. She had no time to get angry at him for  not telling Jumin, no time to yell at him for being a horrible friend to Jumin who trusted him fully. She just murmured a quick goodbye and set off down the hallway away from him.

She wasn't really sure when or how, but by the time she had reached Saeran's office door, the coffee had grown cold. Turning back towards the kitchen defeatedly, she felt the warmth of tears drip down her face.

Saeran didn't pry much after she told him that the reason that she was late was because of some jackass harassing her. He didn't seem to care, he just wanted his coffee hot. She watched as he dumped so much sugar into the mug that she's surprised he didn't need insulin.

Without much trouble, they both went to work. She didn't really hate his guts like she had before not was she super terrified of her. She wondered if he was moody lately or if he had been acting when he was all coy and mysterious in the beginning.

Before, she would have thought that slightly messing up would have caused him to do something devilishly horrible. It's only been two days, but she already felt less rigid around him. Yeah, the atmosphere was absolute hell but he didn't really need to threaten her much. Maybe that was why he seemed to drop the sadistic and cot attitude. Maybe it was because she was doing what he asked without much argument or maybe he was just waiting for his mood to change. Either way, she still threaded carefully around him. She certainly didn't want to see the business end of that pistol again.

While she was in the middle of the third book, she unexpectedly got a light smack in the cheek with a spiked bracer.

It didn't hurt but she flinched back. She realized that he had not done it on purpose but rather he had been stretching and accidentally brushed her. This did not stop her words to rip themselves from her lips.

“Ow! What the fuck was that for!” she growled. It was the first thing to slice the silence since this morning and it was noon. The man for the first time seemed to realize that she was sitting next to him and startled at her outburst. He really gets it the zone when he works. His mint eyes glanced tiredly over at the brunette.

“I didn't mean to, gosh. Calm down.” He grumbled back, folding his arms over each over. This was the first time today she had seen his hands away from the touchscreen. He looked pouty and defensive.

“Why do you wear that dumb bracelet anyways? It's so edgy and borderline dangerous you should expect to hurt someone with It someday.” She began, “I understand you want to look all cool and bruting but damn. Doesn't that hinder your typing?

“Where's this coming from all of a sudden? What does my bracer have to do with my work? I can work fine with It on.” He stated, turning his swivel chair towards her and away from his work. Oh, this was the perfect chance to distract him from his work and slow him down! Myung propped her head on her arm.

“And also, why do you wear your jacket like that? You know it's supposed to cover both of your shoulders, right?” She questioned. Saeran lifted his eyebrows at this commentary on his fashion sense...or there lack of.

“Look,” he demanded, leaning back and pointing at his decorated shoulder, “It shows off my tattoo if I leave one sleeve off.” He pointed out as if proud of it. Myung blinked and came up with another question.

“Ah, I see. Why on earth would you show off that tattoo anyways? You know tattoos are super frowned on.” she questioned, looking at her nails. He hadn't even glanced at the monitors. She was doing a good job. He struggled to articulate his answer, but he finally did.

“Its dedicated to this place, to my Savior. It shows my dedication to the Mint Eye and to all of the Believers here. In a way, it even shows my dedication to you.” He said, almost smiling to himself at the thought of such a noble cause. But something else lead him to frown and lose that dream like look of happiness from talking about his passion. “But it also reminds me every day of the ones who have hurt me, who have betrayed me.” his time turned dark at some memory. Myung just kept her gaze at her fingernails, not knowing what to say to that. He is so edgy.

“You said dedicated to me? Why would you be dedicated to me, I'm just the RFA hostage, right?” She questioned, sharing her thoughts on the situation, on her position.

There was a moment when she thought she saw softness in the man's eyes. Maybe even a hint of confusion but overall, his expression stayed confident. He leaned forward in his chair and placed his elbows on his knees.

“I'm dedicated to you because I know that I have saved you by bringing you here. I know that one day you'll thank me for this. You'll be so happy once you find out that you got out of the hellhole that is the RFA. Saving people like you who have been fooled is my dedication. I'm sure that you'll accept this place as your home.” He said with the same confidence in his voice, a lingering hint of genuine concern and sincerity coated his words.

He actually truly believes he's helping her. He really believes that. In his eyes, he has saved her. How? What kind of shitty situation has he been in that makes him believe that this place could ever be a home for him? She felt a twinge of pity for the man.

“If that's how you believe...then why do you say that the RFA is a hellhole. I'll admit that everyone has their flaws, even the person I'm most biased towards. But how can you say that people who work so hard to help others are bad?” She was actually curious and forgot that she was supposed to be distracting him. She wanted to know how he would rationalise this. He took a deep breath appearing to be choosing his words carefully.

“I don't think that everyone in the RFA is bad. There are just two inherently evil and corrupted people who lie and mislead the others. This is what has corrupted the RFA. They all need salvation with the exception of one person who doesn't deserve it.” he said this slowly to really hand the point over to her.

“Let me guess, because of Rika, V is the one that doesn't deserve “salvation”?” She guessed, but Saeran shook his head. Then who…?

“As horrible as V is and as bad as the things he has done, he may with a lot of guidance be saved. The one who is too far gone is Luciel. The Savior and I decided that he would never be allowed to enter paradise because of what he had done.” The topic turned his voice bitter, his eyes grew dark and bitterness turned his face to stone. Myung was perplexed. What had Seven possibly done? She made her mind up to defend him.

“I'm sure that's not the case. Seven is weird, yeah, and he also lies a bunch but that's his job. I don't think he's a bad person. If what you say is true, then the worst he has done is let me stay in an apartment with a bomb.” She tried to sound lighthearted as if the apartment wasn't a big deal. If she got out of here, however, she would chew his ass over it.

“And if that's the worst, then Jumin saved me from that. As long as he takes the bomb out, all is forgiven right?” She tried to reason in defence of her friend...if she could call him that. Their last conversation could have been a friendship ender.

The man instead of immediately arguing back gave an unexpected and chilling laugh. She was taken aback and was almost tempted to scoot her chair away from him. What on earth could be worse than leaving a bomb in an apartment? When the laughter finally died from the man, his green eyes glinted. There it was, that lost coy attitude that had disappeared for the past few days.

“He's got you so fooled! Can't you see that he's got you completely brainwashed in believing him? He's horrible and you wouldn't dare trust him around you if you knew what he's done. You don't even know what to call him. Tell me, what's his name, Myung?” he asked trying to prove a point. She had never been less confident in an answer. Saeran's eyes never left hers. With the length of time that she took hesitating, his smile grew with the satisfaction that she didn't know.

“Well… His baptismal name is Luciel…. That's all I know. Besides, his name doesn't really matter. Lots of people have nicknames.” she answered, surely he couldn't argue with that. Saeran lifted his eyebrows and leaned his head on his palm.

“You're too sweet, too naive. His names are not nicknames, Myung. He doesn't use his real name because he wants to forget the horrible things he's done.” He he said with a knowing smile. A dangerous smile.

“What do you know? How would you know what he's done? “ she challenged. The man grabbed her hands and pulled them into his own. He had very cold hands, she observed. She would have yanked her hands back if she wasn't so invested in the conversation.

“That's what I'm trying to tell you. Just be patient and I'll let you in on the whole story.” when he said the word “patient”, he squeezed her hands.

“Imagine there are two twin brothers in a house with only their mother. These two boys are super close and rely on each other for everything because their mother is abusive and violent in every sense of the two words. She rarely fed the two so they had to be especially careful of her whims in order to get fed” He began, Myung felt transfixed by his words. What is he getting at?

“One of the two boys is highly favored while the other boy who is weak is picked out and used to vent the mother's anger. Because the stronger brother is favored, he is allowed to go outside of the house and he goes to church. Of course, he comes home and tells the weaker twin that he met nice people at church and is planning on rescuing them both. Let me spoil the story for you.” He said the last sentence rather sharply.

“The stronger brother decided that his smaller brother was a burden and left him. The favored brother left and went with his new friends to have parties and have fun. He changed his name to forget the brother he left behind. The abandoned brother, however, didn't get a lucky shot to escape. No, what happened was the mother lost her shit and came down on him twice as hard never believing that he didn't have something to do with the other’s disappearance.” Saeran tugged her hands for emphasis. Myung got it. She understood what the story was about, so that means...

“You're a smart girl so I trust you don't have to be told who the two brothers in this story are, do you? Just to make it more clear, the RFA’s precious Seven is my brother, Saeyoung. I was just lucky enough to be rescued by the Savior.” Saeran laughed darkly at Myung's expression. She was sure her face showed here mix of emotions.

“So, do you think he deserves anything more than hatred? Your good friend?” he asked, tilting his head to the side in mockery. Myung held his gaze for who knows how long. Her heart sank and almost broke.

She herself had two brothers, one older and one younger and she could never leave them in a situation like that. She wasn't even close to her younger brother but just the thought made her heart clench. Seven...no, Saeyoung had never even mentioned that he had a brother. Did he have a reason to leave him? There's still no exception. She would call Saeran a liar, but she saw the look in on his eyes as he shared his story with her. She finally found the words.

“I can't imagine how horrible that was for you. I could never hurt my brothers like that. I...I can't defend what he did to you. I'm really sorry.” She said and tried to look away from his face. Now she really felt like….shit.

“See? It was only a matter of time before he did the same to the RFA, to you.” He then pulled his hands from hers and pulled her to his chest. Woah, this is not okay. “I saved you from that fate.” His voice rang out truth...but It wasn't her truth. She pushed him away and stood. His features shown a hint of hurt before molding back into a mischievous grin.

“I'm sorry Saeran, but you haven't saved me. Bringing me here didn't save me and no matter how much you or anyone here tries, this is not my home. I want to go home, to Jumin. It's not right to keep me here. I know you won't change your mind, but I want you to understand how I feel.” She hesitated before continuing her thoughts “And I want you to understand that it's also not right to trap yourself here.”

Before he could grab her, argue, or stand she headed for the door shouting over her shoulder that she's going to go take a break.

She went to her room that was thankfully empty and had herself a cry. She was confused as of why, but her tears still spilled for the second time that day.

CH1 CH2 CH3 CH4 CH5 CH6 CH7 CH8 CH9 CH10 CH11 CH12 CH13 CH14 CH15 CH16 CH17 CH18 CH19 CH20 CH21 CH22 CH23 CH24 CH25 CH26

[iambicstateofmind]

18 Poetic Songs With Political Undertones

     1. “Amazing Grace” -John Newton 

Originally written in 1779 by Anglican clergyman John Newton, this song has become an anthem for civil rights movements around the world. I’ve included links to two of my favorite versions, The Soweto Gospel Choir and Joan Baez, as well as to the heartwarming moment when President Barack Obama sang the song while speaking at the funeral for South Carolina State Senator Clementa Pinckney. 

“Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound, that saved a wretch like me. I once was lost but now am found, was blind, but now I see...”

     2. “Another Brick In The Wall, Part 2″ -Pink Floyd

Among the most memorable songs from Pink Floyd’s iconic concept album The Wall, this song speaks about conformity in society, with students being stripped of their autonomy at a young age.  

“We don’t need no education. We don’t need no thought control...”

“All in all, you’re just another brick in the wall...”

    3.  “Blowin’ In The Wind” -Bob Dylan

Written by Bob Dylan in 1963, this song quickly became an anthem of the civil rights movement and ant-Vietnam War movement through the 1960s and into the ‘70s. 

Joan Baez Cover: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QLUDJlx5jEc

Peter, Paul and Mary Cover: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ld6fAO4idaI

Stevie Wonder Cover: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y8q1I9f1l4U

“How many roads must a man walk down before you call him a man? How many seas must a white dove sail before she sleeps in the sand? Yes, and how many times must the cannonballs fly before they're forever banned? The answer, my friend, is blowing in the wind. The answer is blowing in the wind...“

    4.  “Born in the USA” -Bruce Springsteen

Frequently misinterpreted as a zealously patriotic song due to its title, chorus and driving beat, this song is really a scathing critique of the Vietnam War and the country’s failure to alleviate the suffering of working-class Americans. 

“Born down in a dead man's town. The first kick I took was when I hit the ground. You end up like a dog that's been beat too much, 'til you spend half your life just coverin' up...”

“Come back home to the refinery. Hiring man says ‘Son if it was up to me.’ Went down to see my V.A. man, he said ‘Son, don't you understand’...”

“Down in the shadow of the penitentiary. Out by the gas fires of the refinery. I'm ten years burning down the road. Nowhere to run ain't got nowhere to go...”

“Born in the USA” Live 1985: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jqUk0SMzkeI

     5. “The Boxer” -Simon & Garfunkel

A folk song about working-class America. 

“I am just a poor boy though my story's seldom told. I have squandered my resistance for a pocketful of mumbles, such are promises. All lies and jest, still a man hears what he wants to hear and disregards the rest, hmmmm”

“When I left my home and my family, I was no more than a boy in the company of strangers, in the quiet of the railway station, runnin' scared, laying low seeking out the poorer quarters, where the ragged people go, looking for the places only they would know...”

“In the clearing stands a boxer, and a fighter by his trade and he carries the reminders of every glove that laid him down or cut him 'til he cried out in his anger and his shame: I am leaving, I am leaving, but the fighter still remains...”

From the Concert in Central Park: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6JUbFj0BIc4

    6. “Brain Damage” -Pink Floyd

From Pink Floyd’s legendary album Dark Side of the Moon, “Brain Damage” is a powerful song centered around issues of mental illness. 

“And if the dam breaks open many years too soon. And if there is no room upon the hill. And if your head explodes with dark forebodings too, I'll see you on the dark side of the moon...”

“The lunatic is in my head. The lunatic is in my head. You raise the blade, you make the change.You rearrange me 'til I'm sane. You lock the door and throw away the key. There's someone in my head but it's not me...”

“And if the cloud bursts, thunder in your ear. You shout and no one seems to hear. And if the band you're in starts playing different tunes, I'll see you on the dark side of the moon...”

 “Brain Damage”/”Eclipse” Audio: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DVQ3-Xe_suY

     7. “Bridge Over Troubled Water” -Simon & Garfunkel 

Recently performed live by Paul Simon at the 2016 Democratic National Convention, “Bridge Over Troubled Water” is a moving song about unity and solidarity.

“I'm on your side when times get rough and friends just can't be found. Like a bridge over troubled water, I will lay me down...”

“Sail on Silver Girl. Sail on by. Your time has come to shine. All your dreams are on their way. See how they shine. If you need a friend, I'm sailing right behind. Like a bridge over troubled water, I will ease your mind...”

Paul Simon at the 2016 DNC: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v12fPV6QmeU

From the Concert in Central Park: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WrcwRt6J32o

Josh Groban/Brian McKnight Cover: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z0RNp0ShHsU

     8. “Chimes of Freedom” -Bob Dylan

My personal favorite Bob Dylan tune, “Chimes of Freedom” is a simple acoustic melody with lyrics that only a Nobel Prize winning poet like Bob Dylan can write.

“As majestic bells of bolts struck shadows in the sounds. Seemin' to be the chimes of freedom flashing. Flashing for the warriors whose strength is not to fight. Flashing for the refugees on the unarmed road of flight. And for each and every underdog soldier in the night, and we gazed upon the chimes of freedom flashing...”

“Through the city’s melted furnace, unexpectedly we watched with faces hidden as the walls were tightening. As the echo of the wedding bells before the blowin’ rain dissolved into the bells of the lightning. Tolling for the rebel, tolling for the rake. Tolling for the luckless, they abandoned and forsaked. Tolling for the outcast, burning constantly at stake. And we gazed upon the chimes of freedom flashing...”

“Through the mad mystic hammering of the wild ripping hail. The sky cracked it's poems in naked wonder. That the clinging of the church bells blew far into the breeze. Leavin' only bells of lightning and it's thunder. Striking for the gentle, striking for the kind. Striking for the guardians and protectors of the mind. And the poet and the painter far behind his rightful time, and we gazed upon the chimes of freedom flashing...”

“Tolling for the tongues with no place to bring their thoughts all down in taken-for-granted situations.Tolling for the deaf and blind, tolling for the mute. For the mistreated, mateless mother, the mistitled prostitute. For the misdemeanor outlaw, chained and cheated by pursuit. And we gazed upon the chimes of freedom flashing...”

“Electric light still struck like arrows, fired but for the ones. Condemned to drift or else be kept from driftin'. Tolling for the searching ones, on their speechless, seeking trail. For the lonesome-hearted lovers with too personal a tale. And for each unharmful, gentle soul misplaced inside a jail. And we gazed upon the chimes of freedom flashing...”

“Tolling for the aching whose wounds cannot be nursed. For the countless confused, accused, misused, strung-out ones and worse. And for every hung-up person in the whole wide universe. And we gazed upon the chimes of freedom flashin'...”

Bob Dylan Audio: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LVIWA9VTiN8

Bruce Springsteen Cover (1988): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G3onnJuBS18

     9. “Imagine” -John Lennon

John Lennon was a visionary. And this song was his vision. 

“Imagine there's no heaven. It's easy if you try. No hell below us. Above us, only sky. Imagine all the people living for today. Imagine there's no countries. It isn't hard to do. Nothing to kill or die for. And no religion, too. Imagine all the people living life in peace...”

“You may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one. I hope some day you'll join us, and the world will be as one...“

John Lennon - Imagine: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VOgFZfRVaww

Joan Baez Cover: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cw4_zOeOL7Y&pbjreload=10

     10. “It’s Alright, Ma (I’m Only Bleeding)” -Bob Dylan

In this haunting song from the album Bringing It All Back Home, Bob Dylan delivers a striking analysis of the world as he sees it. 

“Pointed threats they bluff with scorn. Suicide remarks are torn from the fools gold mouthpiece the hollow horn plays wasted words, proves to warn that he not busy being born is busy dying...”

“While preachers preach of evil fates. Teachers teach that knowledge waits. Can lead to hundred-dollar plates. Goodness hides behind its gates. But even the President of the United States sometimes must have to stand naked...”

“While one who sings with his tongue on fire gargles in the rat race choir Bent out of shape from society's pliers, cares not to come up any higher, but rather get you down in the hole that he's in...”

“And if my thought-dreams could be seen, they'd probably put my head in a guillotine. But it's alright, Ma, it's life, and life only...”

Video: Bob Dylan performing this song live: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mYajHZ4QUVM

     11. “Let It Be” -The Beatles

A song of hope that the world needs more than ever right now.

“When I find myself in times of trouble, Mother Mary comes to me, speaking words of wisdom: ‘Let it be.’ And in my hour of darkness she is standing right in front of me, speaking words of wisdom: ‘Let it be’...”

“And when the brokenhearted people living in the world agree. There will be an answer. Let it be. For though they may be parted. There is still a chance that they will see. There will be an answer. Let it be...”

Audio: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QDYfEBY9NM4

Alicia Keys & John Legend Cover: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A7K8Sap0zjE

    12.  “Masters of War” -Bob Dylan

Steeped in rage and dripping with bitterness and resentment, “Masters of War” is a fierce condemnation of the Vietnam War that continues to be painfully relevant to the problems of gun violence in present-day America.

“Come, you masters of war. You that build the big guns. You that build the death planes.You that build all the bombs. You that hide behind walls. You that hide behind desks. I just want you to know I can see through your masks...”

“Like Judas of old, you lie and deceive. A world war can be won, you want me to believe. But I see through your eyes, and I see through your brain like I see through the water that runs down my drain...”

“Let me ask you one question. Is your money that good? Will it buy you forgiveness? Do you think that it could? I think you will find when your death takes its toll, all the money you made will never buy back your soul...”

Ed Sheeran Cover: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aHMlAYeFeYw

     13. “On the Turning Away” -Pink Floyd

An impassioned plea against complacency and silence in the face of human suffering. 

“On the turning away from the pale and downtrodden and the words they say, which we won’t understand. Don’t accept that what’s happening is just a case of others’ suffering, or you’ll find that you’re joining in the turning away...”

“It’s a sin that somehow, light is changing to shadow and casting its shroud over all we have known...”

“On the wings of the night, as the daytime is stirring. Where the speechless unite in a silent accord. Using words you will find are strange, mesmerized as they light the flame. Feel the new wind of change on the wings of the night...”

“No more turning away from the weak and the weary. No more turning away from the coldness inside. Just a world that we all must share. It’s not enough just to stand and stare. Is it only a dream that there’ll be no more turning away?”

Audio: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ojf18wT_Xtk

     14. “Redemption Song” -Bob Marley & the Wailers

The final track from the album Uprising, “Redemption Song” is a slow, contemplative track about personal and political empowerment and the ongoing fight for freedom and for justice. 

“Emancipate yourselves from mental slavery. None but ourselves can free our minds! Have no fear for atomic energy, cause none of them can stop the time. How long shall they kill our prophets while we stand aside and look? Some say it's just a part of it. We've got to fulfill the book...”

“Won't you help to sing these songs of freedom? Cause all I ever have, redemption songs...”

Audio: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xUNh9lmmUA8

Rihanna Cover: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cCqquMFQ9IM

John Legend Cover: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tlQn8_I6pjY

     15. “The Sound of Silence” -Simon & Garfunkel

A powerful song about standing up and speaking out told through beautiful harmonies and eerie melodies.

“Hello darkness, my old friend. I've come to talk with you again. Because a vision softly creeping left its seeds while I was sleeping, and the vision that was planted in my brain still remains within the sound of silence...”

“And in the naked light I saw ten thousand people, maybe more. People talking without speaking. People hearing without listening. People writing songs that voices never share and no one dared disturb the sound of silence...”

“’Fools’, said I, ‘You do not know, silence like a cancer grows. Hear my words that I might teach you. Take my arms that I might reach you.’ But my words, like silent raindrops fell and echoed in the wells of silence...” “And the people bowed and prayed to the neon god they made. And the sign flashed out its warning in the words that it was forming. And the sign said: ‘The words of the prophets are written on the subway walls and tenement halls and whispered in the sound of silence...’”

Audio: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4fWyzwo1xg0

Video--Recorded Live in 1966: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FaSFzp6IDgw&t=77s

     16. “Streets of Philadelphia” -Bruce Springsteen

Oscar-winning song from the soundtrack of Philadelphia, a moving film starring Tom Hanks and Denzel Washington that confronted the stigma surrounding HIV/AIDS.

“I was bruised and battered, I couldn't tell what I felt. I was unrecognizable to myself. I saw my reflection in a window, I didn't know my own face. Oh brother are you gonna leave me wastin' away on the Streets of Philadelphia...”

“Ain't no angel gonna greet me. It's just you and I my friend. My clothes don't fit me no more. I walked a thousand miles just to slip this skin...”

“The night has fallen, I'm lyin' awake. I can feel myself fading away. So receive me brother with your faithless kiss. Or will we leave each other alone like this on the Streets of Philadelphia...”

Music Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4z2DtNW79sQ

Movie trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cl4B9AU45P4

     17. “Us and Them” -Pink Floyd

From near the end of The Dark Side of the Moon, “Us and Them” is a deeply soulful song chronicling the senselessness of war. 

“Us and them. And after all we're only ordinary men. Me and you. God only knows it's not what we would choose to do. ‘Forward’ he cried from the rear and the front rank died. And the general sat and the lines on the map moved from side to side...”

“Down and out. It can't be helped but there's a lot of it about. With, without. And who'll deny it's what the fighting's all about? Out of the way, it's a busy day. I've got things on my mind. For the want of the price of tea and a slice, the old man died...”

Audio: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDbeqj-1XOo

     18. “We Are The World” -Michael Jackson & Lionel Richie

Initially recorded as a charity single by various American artists in 1985 for famine relief for several African countries and remade in 2009 to support the people of Haiti after a devastating earthquake, “We Are The World” remains a legendary song about unity and strength in the face of adversity. 

“There comes a time when we heed a certain call when the world must come together as one. There are people dying and it's time to lend a hand to life, the greatest gift of all...”

“We are the world, we are the children. We are the ones who make a brighter day so lets start giving. There's a choice we're making. We're saving our own lives. It's true we'll make a better day just you and me...”

USA for Africa “We Are The World”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9AjkUyX0rVw

We Are The World 25 for Haiti: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Glny4jSciVI

If you read all of that, you are a rockstar. Bless your beautiful soul.

[backtothestart02]

Fallen Star - 7/?

A/N: Not all that exciting, I assure you, but certainly longer than any of the previous chapters. I hope you find something in it worthwhile.

*many thanks to @valeriemperez for beta’ing.

Chapter 7 -

No matter how hard Iris tried, she could not seem to focus on Linda’s genius plan to piss Barry off in order to bring them back together. She knew in theory it was solid, and she did have to admit the story was one she would have greedily chased if it actually existed, though maybe she wouldn’t act on it to the extent Linda was suggesting she would – hypothetically speaking, but she couldn’t stop thinking about that New Year’s Eve party at STAR Labs that she had yet to make a decision about.

Barry had bought her a gorgeous shiny floor-length dress for their six-month anniversary near the end of November. She knew he’d been eyeing the dresses that showed a little more skin than this one did and just didn’t want to be labeled a perv by the girlfriend of his dreams and tried to tell him so. He refused to admit to it though, and so she told him she appreciated the gift. Which she did. The dress was absolutely stunning and looked amazing on her when she tried it on.

You would’ve thought she was wearing lingerie from Barry’s inability to speak and the color draining from his face, the bulge forming in his pants. It did show a bit of cleavage and there was a slit for her leg, but she didn’t think it warranted that much of a reaction.

Still, when he lunged for her, and she giggled, “Don’t rip the dress!”, he sped-stripped it off of her and responded, “Save it for New Year’s.” She’d nodded, giddy. “That’s perfect.”

It’d been a magical, intoxicating night after that, and when she found the dress in her closet today she could not help but think of that night and the bright future that lay ahead of them then. One that, as far as she could tell, had been wiped from existence now.

She turned her phone over and over in her hand, trying to decide. Linda had offered to take her with her to New York City where her cousin had managed to snag an invite to a classy party on a rooftop in full view of the huge glittering ball that would sound off the new year. It was an enticing offer, she had to admit. She’d never seen the ball anywhere other than on TV. She’d never even been to New York. She always wanted to go, see the lights all lit up at night, be amidst the crowds on a busy Friday night or a busy Friday day. She wanted to go to a Broadway show and spend hours shopping at vendors in the city streets. She wanted to browse through Tiffany’s most beautiful – and expensive – diamond collection and be stopped in the middle of Times Square because her face was zoomed in on the big screen.

She wanted to kiss who she was with in that moment, have it shown to everyone who was walking by. She wanted that magic of knowing anyone who cared to pay attention could see how desperately in love she was with that person.

And she wanted that person to be Barry.

Tears welled in her eyes as she abandoned the phone on the table and went to curl in a ball on the couch.

She wanted everything with Barry.

She’d wanted Christmas with Barry – mistletoe and eggnog and a fully decorated tree and opening presents and caroling and waking up on Christmas morning wrapped up in each other and eating Christmas cookies, one of her few specialties she excelled at.

She hadn’t gotten that this year. They hadn’t gotten it this year.

Instead they fought and broke up, and her favorite holiday in the world was forever tainted because apparently her Bear had been restraining himself for fear of losing her and had decided that if it was worth the risk if she had some sense knocked into her.

The rumblings of anger buzzed inside her, but it wasn’t nearly as intense as it had been a week ago or any day since. Because right now she missed him so much it hurt. Right now she was willing to throw away her entire career if it meant holding him in her arms again and hearing I love you float passed his lips, hearing I missed you and let’s never break up again tumble off his tongue. She missed the pressure of his lips against hers, of his body against hers, of his fingers in her hair, his whisper in her ear…

She missed everything.

Why couldn’t things be okay? Just for one night, one magical, endless night, why couldn’t their love be enough?

She shivered where she sat and pulled a folded blanket up over her, huddling into its warmth.

But he’s not even going to be there, Iris.

It could be the truth. He might not decide to show, if Cisco prodded Barry to show up the way Caitlin had done to her.  They might be in the same space, and not by accident either. Whenever Cisco and Caitlin teamed up on something, it was usually with good intentions. Which meant they wanted to get the two of them back together and had likely decided since they were making no moves in that direction, it was up to the saavy science nerds of Team Flash to step in for them.

If only it was so simple.

Her phone buzzed across the room, nearing the edge of the table where she’d left it.

It was either Linda, asking her if she was sure she wanted to spend her New Year’s Eve alone, even though she was likely already in New York getting ready for the party. I’ll send in the ‘copter, she’d probably say, only half-joking – or it was Caitlin, reminding her that the party started in less than two hours and she had yet to give her a response.

She bit her bottom lip, thought about that dress, about Barry being there, about Barry not being there, about truly spending another holiday moping and/or feeling depressed, about the rest of the team that probably only wanted to help, about the champagne and the smiles and the new year that could change everything.

She snapped to her feet, zipped across the room, her slippers sliding on the wood floor, and answered the call.

“Hey, Caitlin.”

“Iris! Hey, I was just calling becau-”

“I’m coming.”

A pause, probably due to shock and uncertainty.

“You’re…you’re coming?”

“I’m coming, yes.”

“You’re sure.”

“Absolutely positively!” she assured. Too much, Iris, she grimaced a beat later.

“Well, that’s…great!” A smile in her voice. It made Iris smile too. “You can just head on up to the roof when you get here. If no one’s up there we’re just grabbing extra food and drink.”

“Great! That sounds great, Caitlin. I can’t wait.”

A pause – more smiling from both of them.

“I’ll see you later then, Iris.”

“Should I bring anything?” she asked hurriedly, the thought of contributing unexpectedly dawning on her suddenly.

“Nope. Just yourself,” she soothed.

“Just myself.”

“See you at seven.”

“See you.”

Click.

She set the phone back down on the table and stared out the window, letting the realization of what she’d just done sink in.

A party to forget or a party that might change everything. Her breath caught in her throat, imagining the look that might be in Barry’s eyes when he saw her in that dress – if he sees you, Iris.

She had a feeling he would.

…

Barry stared at himself in the tall mirror and sighed loudly.

“That does not sound like a man who is excited to go to the…” Cisco slid along the floor into view behind him. “Best New Year’s Even party of his life!” he sang.

Barry’s expression did not change.

“Is it too much?”

Cisco glared.

“Dude. You’re wearing a navy suit with a sparkly tie.

“Yeah.”

“It’s better than the first thing you put on.”

Barry paused, recalling, and then nodded resigned.

“Yeah, the bedazzled black tux was a little over-the-top.”

“Ya think?” Cisco deadpanned.

“This might be too, though…”

“You’re not going to the party in a t-shirt and jeans, my friend. This is a party, not…a movie marathon.”

Barry frowned and turned to look at him.

“But Iris isn’t going to be there.”

Cisco raised his eyebrows. “Is that the only time you would try to look nice?”

He shrugged. “Well, it’s nothing with work either or a formal function.”

“Everyone is dressing up,” he complained. “Just because you’re feeling mopey doesn’t mean you have to look that way.”

Barry paused, thinking. “Right,” he finally said. “No, you’re right. Sorry, Cisco.”

Cisco sighed. “It’s all good, my man. We’re gonna have a good time tonight, I promise.”

“Even though I can’t get drunk?” he drawled.

“You don’t need to get a drunk to have a good time,” he almost yelled.

Barry was working his last nerve. He’d been absolutely elated when his best friend hadn’t needed much convincing to agree to come to the New Year’s Eve party he and Caitlin had concocted two days prior. Apparently though, keeping him invested in the idea took a lot more effort than what Caitlin had to deal with – which had just been a last minute rsvp.

“You’re sure Iris isn’t going to be there?” Barry asked, smoothing down his tie again.

“We didn’t invite her,” Cisco said matter-of-factly.

Barry met his eyes. “You don’t think that’s kind of…mean?”

Cisco blinked.

“I mean, she’s part of the team too. Won’t she be offended you didn’t even offer?”

“She doesn’t want to be around you any more than you want to be around her.”

His heart sank.

“Trust me when I say she would’ve said no even if we had asked.”

“Oh,” he said quietly, saddened – and giving Cisco an unbelievable amount of joy.

She’s coming! She’s coming! She’s coming!

But he kept his mouth shut on that little truth. The happy reunion would unfold itself soon enough.

“Think she’s missed me?” he asked, too deep in his sadness to even try to come across nonchalant.

Cisco stilled and gripped his shoulder until Barry looked up at him.

“Do you want me to invite her?”

Barry’s eyes widened. “No.” He shook his head. “No, definitely not. Of course not. No.”

Cisco looked at him strangely. “Does that mean…yes?”

Irritated, he walked passed him. “No, Cisco, it means no.” He sighed, gripping his hands on the counter. “There would be no point.”

Cisco swallowed hard, for the first time genuinely worried that his plan might fall through.

“Why…is that?” he asked.

“Because nothing has changed,” he said sorrowfully. “Neither of us is willing to budge. If I was I’d have groveled at her feet by now, and if she was… Well, she wouldn’t have groveled, but somehow, she would have let me know. It’s been a week, Cisco.” He sighed again and turned to face his friend. “A week.”

“I know.”

“It’s been so hard not seeing her, not being with her, not sharing things with her, not having her as my best friend. It’s like when I broke up with her, I lost all of her. I lost Iris the best friend and Iris the girlfriend.”

Cisco hesitantly walked towards him, bracing himself for the question he was about to broach.

“Correct me if I’m wrong, but…hasn’t it been you avoiding her?”

Barry looked at him. “Has she been trying to contact me without my knowing?”

“Well…” he squeaked.

“Yeah, I didn’t think so.” He ran his hand over his face. “We’re both avoiding each other.”

“Maybe you should both stop. At the very least try to be civil.”

He frowned. “I’m being civil.”

“Because being in the same room with her would make you lash out?”

“I’ve been in the same room with her.”

“When?” he demanded. He didn’t know about this.

“A few days ago, at CCPD. We had a run-in. It didn’t last long. I tripped over myself on the stairs. She snapped at me.”

“Because you fell down the stairs?”

“Because I asked her why she was there.”

“Did you snap first?”

“I don’t think so…I was just returning some files Joe left in my lab.”

“Hmm.”

“Don’t analyze it too much, Cisco. All I’m saying is, I’m not the only one trying to avoid a confrontation. And you know what? That’s okay. Maybe right now it’s best if we don’t see each other. Then gradually…in another week or so maybe, we can slowly start interacting again. By Valentine’s Day it’ll be like we were never a couple at all.”

“You don’t sound bothered by that possibility,” Cisco pointed out, slightly troubled. “Isn’t this the girl you’ve been in love with since you were like ten?”

“Nine.”

“Nine. Even worse.”

Barry glared at him.

“All I’m saying is maybe she’s worth not giving up on.”

He sighed. “I tried Cisco. I waited it out. I gently made suggestions. I got a little more forceful. The only effect it had on her was her pushing harder than ever to do what she wanted – or to brush it under the rug. I could forget it at night when it was just us together, hanging out…going on dates…just being us. But…then I’d run across a story she was working on or hear about a dangerous criminal she couldn’t wait to track down – unprotected with zero plan of getting out if her life was in danger. And I can’t be everywhere at once. I can’t concentrate on anything when I know my girlfriend is out there not being safe, being reckless, and that she might die at any moment just because she refuses to have any common sense.”

His temper was rising, his frustration on the issue clearly still present. Cisco wondered for the first time if his genius plan was all that genius. There was a pretty good possibility the party could be shut down before it barely began when instead of kissing at midnight, Barry and Iris started fighting the moment they spotted each other on the rooftop.

“Well, you won’t have to worry about that tonight,” he said, to get his mind off it as much as Barry’s. “Just try to relax, have some fun, drink some champagne pretend you’re affected by it.”

He laughed, a real one, and Cisco relaxed some too.

It was short-lived.

“A night with no Iris sounds like a good night to me.”

Crap.

…

 The wind whipped around her when she stepped out of her car, her hair fluttering around her shoulders as she looked up at the looming STAR Labs and the satellite at the top where she could see decorative white lights lining the perimeter of the roof. There really is a rooftop party, she mused.

Whether or not Barry would be at it was something else entirely, but she’d decided she would risk it. She had this beautiful dress that she’d promised to save for New Year’s. Whether or not she and Barry were together shouldn’t determine what she was allowed to wear or even what she was allowed to do. It was a week from their break-up tonight. If Linda’s plan didn’t work, she would need an escape, something to take the edge off that wasn’t just vodka shots in Linda’s kitchen. And she’d been promised Barry wouldn’t be here. She only trusted that about 50/50, and a big part of her wanted him to be there so she could show him what he was missing – and what he could easily get back if he would just…

Her phone buzzed in the sparkly clutch she’d brought with her. She checked the screen to find a text staring back at her from Cisco.

You coming?

She nodded and took a breath.

Just got here.

She was about to go inside when her phone started to buzz again, this time with a phone call. She frowned by answered it on her way to the building.

“Hey, Caitlin, I just told Cisco-”

“Hey, Iris, I know I told you to just meet us all up on the roof, but HR he…and Cisco...”

“Say no more,” she interjected soothingly. “I’ll meet you guys in the cortex.”

“Great. Thanks.”

Iris smiled and shook her head as she tucked her phone back into her clutch. She had wondered why they hadn’t wanted to all meet up in the cortex or even have the party in the speed lab and head up to the roof when it got closer to midnight. She figured the view was the reason behind it, and she knew she’d agree with that. Plus, maybe they wanted to switch things up given what happened the last time they decorated the cortex and speed lab and… well, obviously the events in their personal lives kept anyone from really enjoying it.

“Iris! Thank God!” Caitlin came speeding towards her as fast as she could in her high heels with her arms full of food and decorations.

Iris quickly stepped out of the elevator before the brunette almost tumbled in with her.

“Hey, let me take something.” She laughed and shook her head as she grabbed a bowl of overflowing popcorn and a box of unopened shot glasses. “I thought you guys prepared for this.”

“I know, I know,” she laughed nervously. “Cisco and I had two days to get our asses in gear, but there was Flash business today – a robbery,” she said hastily, avoiding eye contact as she did. “And, well, HR was determined to decorate but then he accidentally interrupted the lab instead of the roof, and-”

“Hey, hey, breathe,” Iris commanded gently, staring straight at her and willing Caitlin to feel the comfort since her arms were too full to console her by physical touch.

“Right. Breathe.”

“It’s what? Five after seven? That’s almost five hours till midnight. I’m sure we can get everything set up in a half hour or less.”

“You’re right.”

“Where’s Cisco? Maybe we can get everything in order and head up to the roof in like ten minutes? Shouldn’t take too long to decorate, though we may want to think twice about setting out too much food and other things. It was windy in the parking lot. Must be much worse higher up.”

Caitlin’s face fell. “You’re right.”

“Hey, no, don’t worry,” she reassured again. “If it’s really bad we can go in the speed lab and just head on up to the roof for the countdown. If we get all the decorations secured, it shouldn’t be a problem. Who wants to be chilly all night anyways, right? It’s nearly January after all and I didn’t exactly come bundled in a winter jacket.”

Caitlin looked down at Iris’ attired for the first time and her eyes widened, her mouth fell open.

“Oh my God, Iris, you look gorgeous.”

Slightly flustered, Iris smoothed down the sparkling dress.

“Thanks, Caitlin, Barry got-”

She stopped and swallowed hard, the words caught in her throat. Luckily, this time Caitlin came to her rescue.

“You know what, why don’t you take these streamers and lights instead?” She offered her other arm to Iris where the items were starting to teeter over. “If decorations are the priority then we should get them up first. I’ll take the snacks back to Cisco and tell him the new plan.”

She frowned. “You’re sure? I can help with more…”

“No need,” she insisted. “It won’t take long for us to get everything sorted. If we’re not up in ten minutes, you can come back and help up get our act together.” She laughed lightly.

“All right…” she said reluctantly. “Maybe five minutes, though?” She started heading back to the elevator.

“Sure. That works fine too.”

She was more puzzled than ever by Caitlin’s sudden avoiding eye contact and the odd tone to her voice, but she dismissed it to her clearly being frazzled by the team’s lack of preparedness. The brunette’s dashing back down the hall where Cisco and HR were likely still trying to organize everything added to that theory.

Still…something was off.

Whatever was off though was completely forgotten when she stepped out onto the roof. She gasped, starstruck at the sight of all the buildings and the lights beneath on the city streets. The stars sparkled across a dark sky and the moon was big and brilliant. She almost dropped the decorations held tightly in her hands.

She was so mesmerized she almost didn’t hear the roof door open and close again.

“Has it been five minutes already?” she asked, smiling when she turned around to greet the newcomer.

The smile immediately dissolved, the rest of her body equally paralyzed. She swallowed hard and reminded herself to breathe.

“Iris.”

God, she hated when she was right.

His voice was raw, rough, stunned, and achingly familiar. Unlike herself, he apparently hadn’t considered the possibility that they might have been set up. She tried not to look too deflated. The part of her that had been aching for this scenario was overwhelmed with the part that wanted to be free of that worry, which was unfortunate given how badly she’d wanted it earlier.

Still, she summoned her courage and walked into the fire with all the grace, class, and half-hearted enthusiasm she could muster.

“Hello, Barry.”

 *Also posted on AO3 and FFnet.

[aliceinthewritingrepublic]

The Spiral on the Edge - III

Story Title: The Spiral on the Edge

Fandom: Boku no Hero Academia

Pairing: Bakugou Katsuki/Reader

Rating: MA

Story Tag: tsote

-

When you see an attractive stranger while partying, you decide that it has been too long since you’ve had an adventure. The exact terms of your loose liaison are soon put to the test.

-

Word Count: 3027

When you first woke up, it was still dark outside. You could not have been asleep for very long, you thought.

Katsuki was lying on his stomach next to you, an arm thrown lazily over you; he was not holding you close or actually embracing you, but you appreciated it nonetheless. So much, in fact, that you decided to remain here just a little while longer. You watched him for some time. The side of his face was pressed into the pillow, mouth open, breath audible, though quietly. Even this position was not able to make him look any less dashing than he did any other time. God, he was gorgeous.

On your second time waking, sunrays had begun to invade the room. Katsuki now had his back turned to you, which was just as well, you supposed. This way, you would not have to untangle yourself in order to leave.

You slowed your breathing to a halt. (You did not require oxygen to function. A quirk that sounded cool in theory, but proved largely useless in practice.) If there was one thing you were good at, it was being sneaky if you wanted to be. Tiptoeing toward the desk underneath which your discarded clothes lay in a heap, you grabbed a random, wrinkled piece of paper and a pen.

X1X-X70X-XX55 text me if you like wouldn’t want to lose sight of you again xx

You left the note on the table, assuming he would find it as soon as he went to pick up his own clothes from last night. Then you got dressed very quietly (foregoing your ripped tights – the pattern they had been ripped apart in was a little too telling for your taste) and threw another look at him over your shoulder. That was when you noticed the dark red lines you had left on his upper back. You liked the idea of him still being reminded of you for a few days this way. You pressed down the door handle and left.

You had only just opened the front door when you heard slight noises from what you had deemed the kitchen last night. Turning towards the sound, you found yourself face to face with the redhead who had interrupted Katsuki and you that fateful first night. His hair was down rather than gelled up this time around.

“Your hair looks nice like that,” you both realized and told him at once. He was grinning at you (those were some pointy teeth!), apparently torn between embarrassment at knowing what you had been doing last night and excitement at having yet something else to tease his roommate with.

“Thanks,” he accepted your compliment good-naturedly. “I was wondering whether we’d see you again.” It was not clear to you whether his weincluded Katsuki, their third roommate or both of them.

You laughed, incapable of feeling embarrassed at his knowledge about what had transpired. “So was I.”

“Can I offer you some coffee or are you trying to flee the scene?”

“If you’re asking whether I’m committing a hit-and-run, no, I’m not. I even left my number and everything!” You considered his offer of a hot beverage for a moment, but knew you had to decline so you would be home in time to take your morning medication. “Think I’ll take a rain check on the coffee, though. I really miss my bed.” He did not need to know about your primordial reason.

“I see. See you around then?” His one-sided grin let you know that he was intentionally quoting what you had said the first time you had met.

“See you around,” you nodded and exited through the door that you had still been holding open this entire time. You hoped that it would prove true.

When Katsuki finally made his way out of his room a good while later, he was surprised to be met by both of his roommates in the kitchen. Eijirou was not as much of a surprise – in order to conform to his ideal of fitness, he often got up very early to train. Denki, on the other hand, was usually a late sleeper. It only reminded Katsuki of how uncharacteristically late he had slept this morning. To be fair, you had worn him out. (Though not as thoroughly as he had worn you out, he thought to himself boastfully.)

Their knowing smiles told him everything, and he did not quite know whether to feel proud or annoyed. Both, maybe.

“Have fun last night?” Eijirou was cutting right to the chase, apparently.

“Shut up,” he growled in response and decided to busy himself with the coffee machine rather than to dignify the others with more of an answer. Unfortunately, this way, Eijirou and Denki were able to get a good look at his back.

“Sure looks like she did,” Denki commented.

It took Katsuki a moment to realize what he was getting at, but once he did, he grumbled. “At least one of us can get laid. Not like you fuckers would know anything about that.”

Eijirou and Denki did not take his bait. Instead, Eijirou kept on talking about you. “You know, I met her this morning while she was leaving. I think she’s older than us.”

“No fucking idea.” Katsuki shrugged. “She’s hot as hell and doesn’t get on my nerves, which is more than can be said about you two assholes.”

He took his coffee back to his room, not in the mood for more of a conversation. Sitting at his desk (where the discarded remainder of your tights still lay on the floor), he read through your note to him once more.

When he had woken up alone, he had felt strange for a moment. Not strongly so – only in the way that it felt strange to be met with unexpected circumstances. If he had been hoping for you to still be there in the morning, he was not willing to admit it to himself. At any rate, it did not matter whether your wordless disappearance would have made him feel anything – since it had turned out not to have been wordless after all.

His roommates’ reminder about the marks you had left on him had given him an idea.

You had been home for about an hour and a half by the time you received his text. Seeing an unknown number on your phone’s display had immediately sown an inkling of hope in you, and you were pleasantly surprised to see it really was Katsuki who had sent you a message.

The image took a moment to load. When it had, you laughed to yourself quietly. It was a photo of his back, covered in angry red stripes, some of them more parallel than others. The awkward angle it was taken from suggested he had taken it himself. How sweet.

Its caption read, ‘Thank you for these.’

So, that’s why he had got in contact with you so unexpectedly early. Obviously, the fresh scratches made for a better picture. Well, you were able to contend with that.

You reached for the waistband of your leggings and pulled it down on one side, holding it in place like that with one hand and pulling your top up a little with the other. Then, you took a photo of your midsection with your phone. Looking at it and deciding it was flattering enough, you began to type a caption for the visible blue bruises on your hips.

‘You certainly returned the favor quite well.’

You hit ‘send’ and then rolled onto your side, giggling like a damn school girl. No matter how sedated the aripiprazole made you feel, today, you were not going to be able to go back to sleep, too activated by the things that had happened last night and this morning.

I’m bored.

And what the hell am I supposed to do about that?

Well, you could be fucking me, for instance.

I’m at home. You know where that is.

A couple of weeks later, the spell had not yet worn off. The raw intensity of the attraction you felt to him never wavered, but rather only changed shapes, twisting and turning into something new every time you were with him, every time he was inside you.

Somehow, you had become a regular at the three guys’ place – and though you were very obviously Katsuki’s guest and his guest only, you got on surprisingly well with both Eijirou and Denki. It was not a rarity to see you in the kitchen on a weekend morning, stocking up on caffeine and making small talk while Katsuki was grumbling into his coffee about how annoying all three of you were.

But he never threw you out. A favor you repaid by never overstaying your welcome, instead opting to leave on your own terms and eventually come back after a few days – also on your own terms.

“She really said that?” you questioned in disbelief at a story Eijirou had been telling about a girl he, himself, had met while partying. While waiting for his reply, you took the now-empty pot to the sink and filled it with water, preparing to make another few units of coffee.

“Yeah, can you believe it?!” Eijirou replied enthusiastically, gesturing with his hands. You found him adorable.

You were just about to say something more when you slipped up while refilling the coffee maker and spilled the water all over the counter and floor.

“Shit,” you sighed in frustration, moving immediately to get a rag with which to clean up the mess you had just made.

That was the exact moment in time that Katsuki, who had thus far endured the conversation rather quietly, chose to contribute a few choice words. “Fucking pay attention to what you’re doing, will you, you idiot?”

It did not even bother you anymore when he spoke to you like this. You knew it was simply who he was.

Looking over your shoulder from your position on the floor, where you were wiping up the water you had spilled, you warned, “Careful. Keep talking to me like that, I might actually fall in love with you.”

You waited for a beat to let the joke have proper impact before you laughed out loud, inviting everyone else to join you.

You had always been supremely bad at anticipating the future.

“Oh fuck.” You inhaled through your mouth, teeth pressed together.

Katsuki’s tongue was working wonders between your thighs. You had your legs resting on either of his shoulders, the muscles in your calves contracting and relaxing on their own accord. The surface of the kitchen counter you were sitting on was cold and uncomfortable, but you liked the idea of him ravishing you in a place where other people would be appalled to find you.

“You really enjoy having sex in any place that isn’t your bed, don’t you?” you asked, running your fingers through his stupidly spiky blond hair fondly.

He pulled back for a moment. “And you fucking don’t?”

Your affirmative answer unwittingly became another loud sigh when he pulled your clit into his mouth. The combination of his sucking and the relentless teasing of his tongue against your most sensitive nerve endings was hurling you closer to the edge fast.

You attempted to keep up the conversation to delay your own peak. While nothing compared to the all-encompassing pleasure of the orgasms he provided you, you had always loved that moment just before you came, that most promising of plateaus.

“There’s so many places left for us to try. One of those alleyways between here and the club. Your roommates’ beds.” Your own voice sounded hollow to you now as pleasure threatened to take over your mind. “The hood of a car. I don’t have a car. But any car will do.”

His large hand squeezed your thigh in approval. Then, you came.

Afterwards, he kissed you, open-mouthed and deep, letting you taste all of yourself on his tongue. The force behind his movement almost pushed you against the kitchen cupboard behind you – had there not been his hand at the back of your head, making sure you did not hurt yourself.

When he came inside your mouth, you were not as surprised by the sheer amount of fluid his body expelled as you had been the first time.

Everything about him was an exaggeration. His stamina, his ability to stay hard after one orgasm, the intensity with which he came. In less sexual terms, the thought applied, as well. He was needlessly loud and dirty-mouthed, needlessly intriguing and attractive. Perhaps the worst thing about all of this was that he knew. Or maybe that was not so bad at all – the fact that he never pretended to be anything but exactly what he was made him incredibly authentic. You never had to second-guess anything he said or did, never had to worry about a hidden meaning behind any of it.

You swallowed the liquid, bitter salt.

“You give fucking amazing head, [Name],” he complimented a little while later, while you were lounging around in a post-sex haze. He was lying on his back, sprawled across the bed like the king of the world. You were lying next to him on your side, head on his midsection, breathing in his skin. Your legs were angled just enough so your feet were not hanging off the side of his bed.

“So I’ve been told,” you laughed, nuzzling the bare skin of his stomach. You loved his natural scent, whether he had just been sweating or not. The way his abs were readily apparent under the surface was only one of many facets of his physical perfection.

He laughed along with you. You appreciated that he did not mind your implication of previous sexual partners in the slightest. Then again, you supposed it would have been more than inappropriate for him to take issue with the idea of you having had some (or many) sexual encounters before him, especially given the nature of your current arrangement.

“Seriously, though. How the hell do you hold your breath for that long?” He did not lose a single word along the lines of being worried about your wellbeing, but the implication was there.

“Right, I guess I’ve never told you. Well, it never came up. That’s my quirk. I don’t actually need to breathe.”

Next thing you knew, there was his hand directly below your nose, registering the streams of carbon dioxide you were exhaling. “…the fuck?”

“I mean, I do breathe. But it doesn’t really do anything for me. It didn’t manifest until I was about three years old or so, so my body developed normally until then. My brain stem does its thing, and I inhale and exhale without actively controlling it. But if I concentrate and stop breathing, I can go for hours. That’s actually how my parents figured it out. They were scared I’d drowned in the bathtub, but I just really enjoyed being underwater.”

“I’ve never met anyone with a quirk like that,” he replied, voice even enough to imply disinterest in anyone that was not him. You did not linger on the thought of how well you knew how to read him already.

“I don’t think it’s really common, but even if it were, it’s not like you’d hear a lot about it. It’s kinda cool in theory and all, but it’s not like you can do a lot of cool things with it or anything. As a kid, I wanted to be a hero when I grew up. But then I realized that my quirk is pretty useless in the people-saving and crime-fighting regard. So, I gave up on that pipe dream rather quickly.”

He did not answer verbally. Instead, he just gave a noise that was parts agreement and parts something more. The something more interested you.

“Don’t tell me you wanted to be a hero when you were a kid, too?” you asked, intrigued.

“I am a fucking hero,” he emphasized, the pride noticeably swelling in his body underneath you. “I’m in the top ten, for fuck’s sake. You didn’t know that?”

Apparently, he was famous. You could not help but giggle at the absurdity of it all, a little embarrassed. The one time you fucked someone famous – and you had not even realized.

“Don’t be offended,” you requested softly, pressing a kiss to his stomach. “I don’t really keep up with hero news. Or news at all, for that matter.”

You hoped it did not make you sound as stupid as you feared it would. The truth was that most days, you simply did not have the expendable mental energy to face what was going on in the world. You found it hard to concentrate even on the things you did enjoy – it was downright impossible when it came to things you found arduous, like reading about and accepting the current state of the world.

“I’m not. It’s kinda fucked up, but somehow, I prefer knowing that you didn’t just wanna fuck me because you’ve seen me on tv.” He was smirking, obviously enjoying the power that this newfound knowledge afforded him.

“I don’t even own a tv. I just wanted to fuck you cause I thought you were hot.” You shot him a wide smile, not an ounce of embarrassment left in you now. “And I still do, by the way.”

“When I saw you on that dancefloor, I thought you were the most fuckable woman I’ve ever seen.”

You laughed gleefully at his compliment, glad that the conversation had taken this turn after all.

Feeling that you had already shared too much of yourself, you welcomed the chance to focus the conversation on him instead. He knew about your quirk now, and that was fine. He still did not know your last name. Your age. Where you lived. He did not know about your darkness.

You preferred it this way.

“So,” you started, moving so you were lying next to him, using his bicep as a pillow and facing him. “Tell me about your quirk.”