#yeah i dont know. why i spent so much time on this it was supposed to be a sketch kJRLDKJGF . anyway

[eddiethehunted]

based on this ask that @chickensoupforthehomosoul​ sent me 🤭

version without the speech bubbles under the cut in case anyone wants it ⬇️

[mayaree-darling]

just a bit of luck your way // Self Aware Wuthering Waves (Jiyan)

Pairing(?): SelfAware!Jiyan and Player!Reader

Synopsis: You're one of the many players who started playing Wuthering Waves on release and of course the main thing you waited for is pulling for Jiyan.

From Mayaree: celebrating rn coz i got Jiyan and his weapon on my first 10 pull on each banner (dont know if that's supposed to happen but still a celebration).

CW: self aware au; no concrete spoilers because i just reached a little past level 20; swearing; second person pov (you, your, etc.)

Word Count: 2.8k (unedited)

Surely, surely there was something wrong with this game. You know for a fact you ain't that lucky - especially in these anime gacha games - so either there was something wrong with this game or the devs were just that giving to their players.

You had decided to play Wuthering Waves on a whim, caught up on the excited chatter you've been hearing all over the internet at its coming release. Patiently waiting for the servers to open worldwide, you sat down on your cozy chair with some snacks and a drink, ready to play. A grin ticks your lips upwards as you're taken to choosing your character.

You gotta say, the game is pretty amazing on your first run. Attack, parry, dodge. Seems simple enough. With a few fights, you were getting used to the routine and the enemies' patterns. If you had to nitpick something, though-

"This feels a little too easy." You were by no means an overly skilled player, as far as you were aware. Maybe it's because you're just barely past the start of the game, but it feels like the enemies were dying a bit too quickly. And you were only dealing like 10 damage per swing.

But just as you say it, you sit up in your chair in attention. Did… did they just get harder to kill? No, wait, you did just raise your Union Level, so maybe that's why. The enemies' attack patterns are slightly more advanced and although you're dealing more damage, their health bars are keeping up with you. Well, you were complaining earlier, so maybe this was a good thing? You keep playing, now being kept on your toes during combat.

After grinding a bit more - how much time have you spent already? Not enough, you think - you finally unlock what you've been waiting for this whole time.

The gacha system.

You're no stranger to gacha games. If anything, it's the reason you played this game in the first place. Sure the combat was nice, but what was better than collecting these prettily designed anime men and women and running around with them on the open world map? Nothing was more fulfilling than staring at your growing roster of playable characters the longer you played the game.

And for Wuthering Waves, the first addition to your would-be collection appears on the screen.

You'd be lying if you said you were going into the game blind. With the amount of Jiyan videos you've seen from the betas and leaks, you may as well have played him for a month now. From idle animations to his forte attack, you watched as many videos available as you could. And each one solidified for you that you needed to pull for him. That man was coming home one way or another.

Grinding a little more astrite by doing a couple of missions here and there - you had 1,300 astrite, just a little more for the home goal and then- you were ready. Sure it's just a meager 10 pulls but it was definitely a start. And you never know… right? You click the 10 pull button and-

OH??? SHIT, WAS THAT GOLD JUST NOW???? YOU KNOW FOR A FACT GOLD IS A GOOD THING, RIGHT??? You click through the 3-star results as quick as you can and- YEAH YEAH THAT'S HIS ANIMATION IT'S HIM HE'S HOME IT'S JIYAN!

You all but kick the chair away and bump your whole lower half on the table as you jump up in joy. You may as well be doing backflips while you're at it. You got him??? On the first 10 pull, no less???? This game was spoiling you holy shit. And it's only been a day.

Immediately heading over to the characters screen, you go to Jiyan's profile and just. Stare at him. Basking in the fact that you played this game on day 1, got the first available limited 5 star, and on your first fucking 10 pull.

Holy shit.

You scream into a pillow and hope your housemates don't hear. Or maybe they should hear because this has got to be the luckiest day of your life and you'd flex it on their faces if they understood the gacha game hype. Going back to the screen, Jiyan is doing one of his idles, twirling around his spear. My god, he looked glorious. His whole appearance was both beautiful and imposing. He looked so cool, hot damn.

"I'll be relying on you from now on, general." You grin once more and spin your chair with a whoop.

You level him up as high as you can, using all the leveling materials available at the moment. He's capped out at 20 right now because you did just start playing and still haven't unlocked character ascension, but you're willing to grind more just to raise him. You even move him to the first spot in your team (sorry, Rover, you can take the next spot).

You head on over to training, to gather some weapon and leveling materials but also because you want to test him out in battle. Damn it all, those beta videos of him didn't disappoint. He was just as good, if not even better since you're the one playing him right now.

He was definitely fun to play with. Of course, all the characters are fun to play with, but Jiyan was twice as fun. Would it be bold to say it was like you were meant to play as him? Suddenly the game is easier again. But not because the enemies are easy to kill, more so you feel like you're able to move better. You seem to be able to time dodging and parrying a lot better, even knowing when to attack at the best moment. Clearly, it was a really good decision to pull for him.

When you've grinded enough - he's level 40 now and you've fully accepted you're in this game for the long run - you go to level up his 4-star broadblade and then stop. You've saved up enough astrite for another 10 pull, right? Maybe you still have some luck left from the Jiyan pull, so… maybe?

"What do you think, Jiyan? Do I go for it?" You laugh at the absurdity of your one sided conversation. "I think you deserve your main weapon."

To your surprise, you watch as he laughs once, shaking his head and looking away with a barely noticeable smile (it's hard to tell with your gadget's graphics, but you definitely heard him). Was… was that part of his idle animations? You make a split-second decision to check his profile. Uh, no? No, it wasn't? Where'd that come from??? Well, maybe it was a secret animation plugged in by the devs. Game devs did like adding a little secret every now and then, right?

Anyways, although indirectly, Jiyan just gave you his answer. You were pulling for his weapon. You mean, there's still like 20 days left for you to pull if you don't get it right away, so there's no harm in building pity right now. Right? Right. To the gacha you go.

Breathing out - maybe a small prayer to the gacha gods in your head - you click the 10 pull button on the limited-time weapon banner-

WAITWAITWAITWAIT WAS THAT FUCKING GOLD??? AGAIN??? THERE'S NO SHOT. THERE'S NO FUCKING SHOT THAT THIS IS-

You stare at the golden glowing weapon on your screen in disbelief. A second passes, and then another as you stare at the green and gold broadblade. Verdant Summit. In the flesh. Excitement follows soon after like a tidal wave. You're off your chair in the next second again, fist-pumping the air like no tomorrow. You don't even care if your housemates hear you jumping around this time.

"JIYAN, LOOK, WE ACTUALLY GOT YOUR WEAPON!" You think you hear someone knock at your walls but you could care less right now.

When you're seated and back to your screen, you immediately equip the blade to Jiyan and stare again. Fuck, he really did look cool. With the sword, he's even twice as cool. Okay, he was hot, you're not gonna sugarcoat it. He was both in equal measure. You try swinging the blade around and breathe out in awe.

"It looks like it was made for you," you laugh. Well, surely it was. The blade was designed for him from the moment it was created, but still. You hear his little laugh again, but the animation seems to be cut short when you accidentally slash. Whoops.

When the excitement dies down, exhaustion sets in. You look at the time. Damn, it was that late? You really played the game for a whole day? Woof.

But you think it was well worth it as you watch Jiyan with his weapon in action. You finish up battling with a few more enemies before leaning back on your chair, content. Silly as it may be, you wish your team goodnight before logging off for the day.

Jiyan waits until he can't hear your voice or feel the warmth that overtakes him whenever you use him before he moves. He groans as he stretches. You really did enjoy using him to explore Solaris 3, no doubt about that. Not that he was complaining.

Far from it, really.

"Cheater." Jiyan blinks once before turning around. Rover stands there, arms crossed with a frown set upon their face. Jiyan could tell there was no real bite to their expression or words, but he still found it rather funny.

"Are you talking to me, Rover?" Jiyan's voice is calm and collected, but he can feel the corner of his mouth tick upwards ever so slightly.

"You know what you did." Rover scoffs, still lacking actual bite. It was more like teasing, if anything. "You wanted to make them happy that much?"

"Is it not possible I just wanted to visit Jinzhou for a bit? Their goals and mine simply aligned at the moment and I used the opportunity." A lie, but not quite.

Yes, he did want to visit Jinzhou. Word had reached him of the new Rover who even the Magistrate had taken a keen interest to. He wanted to make sure they weren't anything dangerous, despite the prophecy. Jué knows the last thing they need is the Midnight Rangers at the Norfall Barriers and an ambush in the main city.

But the moment he arrived, things were very different. For one, the very Rover he was so wary of ended up working with him in a small team of three. The Rover was no normal person, either. Yes, Jiyan could tell that they were strong and would be able to get stronger at a rapid pace. But they also seemed too observant. How should he put it? It felt like they were seeing something else he couldn't. Or they were seeing everything differently.

And then he felt it for himself.

Your voice is warm but thunderous, and yet it was not painful for the ears. Loud with excitement he can't quite understand. You're excited… that you have him? You even said you would rely on him from now on. He could laugh at how easy you were to please. Something so simple and you were already so happy. Maybe it's simply your emotions leaking into his own soul, but he could feel the genuine joy that you were feeling. He prides himself for choosing to come home as soon as he could if only to share in your happiness. He wanted to understand whatever it is that makes you so excited. After so much bloodshed, your joy felt like a breath of fresh air he hadn't taken in so long.

As you use him to walk around the world and fight Tacet Discords, it felt like he was seeing the world for the first time again. Maybe this is what the Rover was seeing with their observant eyes. Jiyan felt like he was experiencing Solaris 3 for the first time once again. Whenever you gasped at the sights of high cliffs and the boundless sky, he may as well be sighing in amazement with you.

"Right… Took the opportunity. Sure." Rover raised an eyebrow. "And the broadblade?"

Jiyan shrugs. "I find that I work better with a familiar weapon." Another lie, but not quite.

He didn't mind using another weapon. His skills lay in his own sharpened abilities, not in whatever object he had on hand. He could manage fine with any other broadblade you gave him, and he trusted you to help him fight. You fumbled a little bit here and there, made him attack a little recklessly at times, but you were doing your best. Jiyan could count on you in battle.

However, when you asked him if he wanted his weapon, he stopped. Having his sword on hand would do him good, of course. As he told the Rover, he fights even better with Verdant Summit. But, there was something about you asking his opinion. He knows you cannot read his thoughts. And yet you asked. It felt rather nice… A connection between you both. A familiarity he did not expect but was definitely not unwelcome.

He couldn't help the laugh that escaped him. To his surprise, you actually hear him. He frowns at the short panic this causes (did you not want to hear from him after all?), but thankfully you move on from it quickly enough. You take his laugh as a good sign and decide to acquire his weapon.

When he saw the shooting stars alight the waters below, Jiyan pondered for a second. Surely, there won't be any harm in helping you a bit, right? He reaches down and touches one of the stars, immediately making it light a glowing golden light as it shoots to the sky. He feels your joy before he hears it and with it, his own chest is filled with warmth.

There's a silence that overtakes you when you see the weapon that makes Jiyan worried. Did… you not want his weapon after all? But that can't be right, you even asked him for his thoughts. Or did you sense that you received it without effort? Did you realize he helped you get it? Maybe he shouldn't have meddled with your abilities.

Before he can overthink and sink into a spiral of doubt, your screams of joy and the sound of you jumping around in pure happiness fill his ears. Jiyan breathes out in relief, another small smile making its way to his lips. He was worried for nothing. Maybe you were just shocked for a little bit. Did you think he would not help you get it? He knew you would, he just helped you receive it earlier than you would have. He may or may not have simply wished to hear your joyous laughter at the moment.

As you give him Verdant Summit, he tests its weight and familiarity in his hand and perform a couple of swings (maybe he wanted to show it off a bit for you, just a touch). You think it was made for him? Well surely it was, and yet the comment makes him laugh a little more. You've been making him a laugh for a while now.

You enjoy a few more moments with him, battling together. He enjoys them as well, if he was honest, as you spend the time praising him and being in awe. It was rather embarrassing if he was honest, but he appreciated it all the same. Before he knew it, time had flown in an instant. You bid him and the others goodnight before leaving, and he knows you leave with a smile on your lips.

"Uh-huh. Right. I definitely believe you." Rover laughs. "Don't think I didn't see you smile, General Jiyan."

Almost on instinct, Jiyan covers his mouth with a hand, looking away. It barely concealed his embarrassment. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Be careful the others don't catch you helping them too much." Baizhi suddenly speaks from the side. She was so quiet Jiyan almost forgot she was there. The Rover smiles teasingly, before they turn around with a small wave. Baizhi follows soon after with a nod. "Chixia's already complaining that they're showing you too much favoritism."

"I- yes, of course. Thank you for the advice, Baizhi." Jiyan clears his throat.

Was it that obvious? Most likely. Rover and Baizhi may have seen too much considering they've been traveling together for a while now, but if even the others were noticing his closeness to you then he was doing a poor job at hiding it. However, was there really a need to hide it? The others did not try hiding their favor for the warm voice they hear and who guides them. So, there was no need to hide it himself, was there?

He spins his newly obtained sword - an old companion, but he felt like he was seeing it for the first time all over again, with better memories attached to it - and smiles softly. Yes, there was no need to hide how he favored your connection to him. It wouldn't even be a bold claim for him to say he was happy that he had made the decision to come when you called for him.

Jiyan hopes you stay with him for a while longer, if only to see what you see, feel happiness the way you do. He'd like that a lot.

From Mayaree: Said I was gonna write Self Aware Star Rail but I just got too excited. Thank you, WuWa.

✨ Masterlist ✨

Disclaimer: Characters are not mine and belong to their respective creators. Their portrayal is merely my own interpretation of them and may not be accurate to their intended characterization. I stake no claim to the original works, only to the ideas and plot of the fictitious stories I’ve written them into.

[diorsluv]

casual , part 7

“ you said ‘we’re not together’ ”

series m. list previous chapter next chapter

( socialmedia!au )

yourusername

liked by vivianliu, dylanduke25, and 100,299 others

yourusername i’m on that hot girl shit

view all comments

username91 the mirror pics 🤭🤭

username40 gimme sum of the hot girl shit babe 🙏

lhughes_06 yes queen be confident!! don’t let my douchebag of a best friend bring down your happiness

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rutgermcgroarty yay

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_alexturcotte AYEEEE NICE

trevorzegras SHES BACK??

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luca.fantilli i think someone might feel a bit regretful

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vivianliu oh my god

vivianliu mother

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liked by yourusername

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→ yourusername ‼️‼️

→ lhughes_06 i’d rather you date her instead of him

→ jackhughes me too

markestapa he has so much pride i apologize

→ yourusername 🤷‍♀️

→ yourusername you know how i am with my toxic men

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→ vivianliu stop don’t do her like that

→ _alexturcotte violation.

→ dylanduke25 💀💀

colecaufield hello i see those are the headphones i generously gifted you out of the kindness of my heart

→ yourusername i dont like where ur going with this.

→ colecaufield I DIDNT EVEN SAY ANYTHING

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→ colecaufield JACK.

→ yourusername AWWW OF COURSE I WILL (can you get me good tickets 🤨)

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username14 i’m afraid you ABSOLUTELY ATE 💕

username55 mom and dad are fighting again

→ username71 mom and dad??? they didnt even hard launch babe 😭😭

edwards.73 nice

this comment has been deleted

edwards.73

liked by adamfantilli, markestapa, and 93,447 others

edwards.73 spent time with the #1 bro tn

tagged: markestapa

view all comments

dylanduke25 i always knew you had favoritism

→ edwards.73 it’s true mark’s my favorite

→ dylanduke25 YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO DENY IT

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username36 this is so frat boy

adamfantilli this is completely unfair

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username16 i’m waiting for you and rosie to make up

username5 ethan’s cheating with mark 😱

mackie.samo let’s address the allegations

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lhughes_06 why can’t you just stop beating around the bush for once

jackhughes i hope you know she cries herself to sleep every night

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username17 listen to the hughes ethan please 🙏

username3 i’m so confused what’s going on

vivianliu you should’ve spent tonight with her

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→ vivianliu oh my god you drive me insane just make up and fuck already

→ markestapa what’s with the change of heart vivian 🤨🤨

→ vivianliu i give up

colecaufield 👍

→ edwards.73 🙏

username45 ayeee that’s what we like to see

username90 whyd you post a mirror pic too

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_alexturcotte just makeup and makeout

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→ edwards.73 thought you were so against me what happened

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luca.fantilli am i #2 at least 🥹🥹🥹

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→ adamfantilli #2 literally means shit

→ rutgermcgroarty awww luca you’re shit 🥰

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yourusername stop ignoring me please

username37 ethan and mark best duo ⁉️⁉️

username74 let’s talk about the fact that that’s a whole ass mural in a house???

→ username59 frat house go crazy

_quinnhughes stop ignoring her ethan

→ edwards.73 i’m not

trevorzegras should’ve invited me fr

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username16 this is so old chase atlantic coded

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rutgermcgroarty PLEASE she’s sobbing uncontrollably and i know it’s killing you too

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→ rutgermcgroarty if i don’t see you still at her apartment when i wake up in the morning i’ll make sure you never wake up again

→ adamfantilli calm down rut 😭

→ colecaufield i see you’re a bit protective aren’t you rutgermcgroarty

→ mackie.samo why are we threatening each other

→ lhughes_06 okay why are his words effective but mine aren’t 😔😔

→ markestapa what the hell is going on

→ dylanduke25 FIGHT??

→ jackhughes more like a murder dylanduke25

→ vivianliu i stand by rut ‼️

username20 please just have makeup sex already i want the old posts back

→ username2 yeah i think they’re doing that 💀

next chapter notes ) soooo yes they’re a little toxic but i love my toxic men 🥴

tags: @dancerbailey3 @hughesfein @loveforaugust @alwaysclassyeagle @love4ldr @inhoodmood @bunting58 @crazycat-ladys-blog @smoooore @bunbunbl0gs @lilasianmeat

[princesssmars]

holly jolly!

an abby anderson x reader based on my abby winter drabble !

wc : 15.718

contains : fluff, angst and smut . fxf relationship. fem!reader. switch! abby and reader. oral and penetrative sex. strap-on yippee. past abby x owen ewwww. owen hate bc i hate him and its funny. reader is a skier and abby does hockey! shitty dad for reader sorry girls. slight alcoholism sorry girls again. the reader is described as slightly tall i know yall been wanting taller readers. reader is kind of bitchy and abby loves it my fave dynamic (dynamic and pretty much the rest inspired by the little ruse go read it).

a/n : sorry i never got over my drabble guys. i dont know who exactly made hockey!abby but ive read em all so big creds to @angelkissiies @millersaurora @whatwouldsylwrite (and @eightstarr for calling abby princess) everyone else smoochies ily <3 made reader a skier because ive been obsessing over the olympics and i watched mollys game and thought it would be cool if i made a skier reader instead of a figure skater. ballerina next time if yall will indulge my delusions.

christmas has always been a bittersweet holiday.

you can remember the good parts from your childhood. picking out your first stocking with your mom. when your younger brother hid in the cupboard to try and catch santa. when your baby brother got cookie dough all over the kitchen, even on the ceiling. or when you were five years old and your dad gifted you your very first pairs of skis.

but it was hard to remember when the bad could get really bad. constant days spent out in the cold and snow, redoing your runs over and over until your legs burned and your back ached. your days that were supposed to be full of vacationing and fun instead filled with aches and falls and countless arguments once you realized you could start talking back.

some of the few friends you've had over the years tried to get you to focus on the good times and not the bad. that dwelling in the past wouldn't help you move forward. when you were younger you'd just call them assholes and move on, but recently it didn't seem worth the effort. that's probably why you started college with no close friends.

it was fine. you had your smarts, which helped you to get a full-ride scholarship when a skiing one fell through after a bad leg injury a few months back. because of that, your mom managed to convince your dad to get off of your ass for a while as you recovered. you had money thanks to your parents and you had your looks which would land you a hookup once in a blue moon.

you'd even made two acquaintances on campus, your roommate, tonya, who was pretty mellow and made sure not to bring the weed she smoked inside your dorm, and a girl named nora in one of your general ed classes whom you would partner up with often.

so yeah. it was fine. at least until the end of your freshman year.

you were running late for your ten am class, sleeping in because tonya had somehow managed to convince you to go to a small party with her last night and take body shots, and then when you were close to being drunk you saw one of your past hookups in the corner who you had dropped for getting way too attached way too quickly, so then you had to quickly find tonya and run back to your dorm-

youre in the middle of remembering ton's bird-like laugh when you nearly faceplanted into your front door when you ran full force into a hulking mass of a body.

the sound of them lightly cursing and asking if you were okay falls on deaf ears as you pick up your bag and hike it to your class, ignoring the stairs of the other students when you rush and plop into your seat.

luckily you manage to get yourself together afterwards, fixing yourself up at your dorm before heading to your next course with nora. as soon as you sit down she's teasing you about a video she saw of you getting wasted last night and you don't even have the energy to entertain her.

"well, instead of getting drunk off your ass again how about you join me tonight? one of my friends is on the hockey team and i got some nice ass tickets."

"c'mon, nora. hockey? seriously?"

"oh, im sorry ms. olympian, is hockey too good for you suddenly? just a bunch of women tossing a puck around too barbaric for you?"

"wait, you didnt say it was women's hockey."

"well, it is."

"..."

"..."

"what time does it start?"

at around five you're putting on a cute sweater and a puffer jacket before joining nora on the campus bus where she tries to quickly explain the rules of hockey to you in the span of five minutes. she asks how on earth you haven't been to one of the games or at least heard of the team's star breakout player. you have to carefully explain that you've had enough of sports to last a lifetime.

the indoor arena is packed, and you have to roughly squeeze and push multiple people out of the way to get by. nora starts laughing and tells you to leave the violence to the players and you brush her off. (for some reason she constantly loves to tease you.) when you both finally sit in your seats, you notice that they're behind the glass where the team players get out onto the ice and sit for breaks. nora suddenly bangs on the glass behind a player wearing an ANDERSON 20 jersey. the girl stands up and turns around and good god.

you weren't the shortest girl yourself, standing a couple inches over most girls you knew, but jesus she was easily almost six feet tall, and big, even if her jersey and gear probably made her look larger which really didn't help you focus. you liked the contrast of it with her face, bright, cute, and red from the cold as she talked to nora through the plexiglass. you were just about to admire the shape of her nose when her slightly unnerving blue eyes turned to you.

"hey, i recognize you!"

your brows pull in a deep scrunch.

"from this morning, you bumped into me and nearly knocked me on my ass."

"oh my god, i had a feeling that was you!" you hear the familiar noise of nora laughing at your pain. "jeez, how drunk did you get last night?"

"would you just- look, im sorry about earlier. i was hungover and rushing to class."

she smiles and shakes her head. "its chill, dont worry about it. nora, are you going to that party at derek's frat after? i swear he was begging me to come but i wasnt too sure."

"abby, everyone asks you to go to their parties and you never do! live a little." nora pauses before wrapping her arm around your shoulders.

you knew she was about to say something to piss you off.

"even little y/n here is gonna come and properly apologize to someone for once. isn't that right, hun?"

great.

"well, that wasn't my plan for tonight. at all." you say before picking up your giant hockey-themed plastic cup and taking a sip, hoping the chill of your slushie numbs out the rest of this conversation.

abby adjusts some of her straps and her helmet before resting her hand on the glass, noticing how the rest of her teammates are getting ready to go out on the ice. "well, i'd really like to see you there. is there any way i could convince you to come?"

"i don't know, is there?"

"how about... when i win, you come to the party with me."

you couldn't help but roll your eyes so hard they hurt. leave it to nora to be friends with the walking cliche of an arrogant sports player. you could've been spending this moment in your dorm watching a dumb hallmark movie about a businesswoman falling in love with a farmer while eating chips and drinking a self-indulgent capri sun.

"and if you lose?"

the announcer over the loudspeaker called for the game to start and the players started making their way onto the ice. abby winks at you before turning around and joining the rest of her team.

"trust me, i won't."

you scoffed and flopped back into your hard seat, sucking almost angrily at the bright red straw in your slushie to ignore nora's look.

"are all of your friends that annoying?"

"kind of. thought you'd enjoy it though. birds of a feather."

not bothering to entertain her, you focused on the game that was starting in front of you.

you could understand the basics of the game; one team had to get the puck into the other goal several times until they won. you had a brief understanding of some of the other rules, mostly because your father explained every winter olympic sport to you in great detail when you were twelve. it became so boring at one point that you fell asleep and banged your head on the coffee table, startling the both of you so much he decided to let you go to bed.

but as the game goes on you have to admit that anderson is frighteningly good at what she does. she moves gracefully and quickly on the ice, so well you think to yourself that if she ever tires of hockey she could seriously pursue ice skating, but when an opposing player gets too aggressive with her she returns it with force. she's like an avalanche on skates.

when the game ends you can't tell whether you're shocked or agitated. your team won in what nora called a 'total fucking landslide', the bright 6-1 lighting up the scoreboard like a smack in the face. it felt slightly awkward that everyone around you was yelling and celebrating while you were sitting statue still in your seat.

nora could probably sense your discomfort and gently pulled you up, telling you that the both of you could throw your things away before meeting up with some more friends of hers before heading to the party.

so awesome.

her friends were nice enough, a psychology student named leah and her boyfriend jordan who was some type of biology major. they seemed happy to meet you but happier to make googoo eyes at each other and go to the party, which meant you most likely wouldn't see them again once you got there unless you stumble upon the two in a hallway closet or bathroom. there was also mel, a nursing student who seemed slightly closed off but agreed with you when you mentioned this party would probably be loud and gross. a bunch of athletes celebrating a win is a recipe for disaster.

"finally, the campion herself arrives!" jordan cheers and raises his bag of chips up to abby who's walking up to your group, wearing a simple college sweatshirt and some black sweatpants. for something so basic she makes it look good, and if you didn't have any integrity and weren't pissed off about this party bet thing you'd tell her so. but you are pissed off and still have about half of your integrity, so you keep your mouth shut.

when she bumps into your shoulder with a 'told ya i'd win' you're about to reply with a snarky remark when a tall man with dark blonde hair and another with tanned skin and brown hair come up beside her and raise her up on their shoulders, chanting 'anderson, anderson!' on repeat. you look to nora who just rolls her eyes and tells you that she'll introduce you in the car.

you're all split into two cars, with you riding with the two strange men along with abby and nora. they tell you the guysin the front seats are owen and manny. also that they've all known each other since they were teens which definitely doesn't make you feel like an outsider. but manny keeps trying to joke around with you so you don't feel too awkward which you can appreciate. even if you don't really laugh.

when the car stops at a giant white frat house you arent surprised in the slightest. you were about to prepare yourself for another night of drinking and finding another hookup when abby throws her arm over your shoulder and decides that she likes you enough to spend most of the night by your side.

she walks with you to get drinks and then leaves to go celebrate with some other friends while you sit and nurse your drink for a while. it leaves you some time to think, asking yourself why you're acting like you're trapped here when you could just leave whenever you want, but you don't understand why you don't. maybe it's because you'll use any excuse to have a good reason to drown out your problems with alcohol. or because you're lonely but don't feel like admitting it.

after around half an hour she comes back and sits on one side of you while you talk to nora and joins in. she asks about your major, if you're from seattle, and how you met nora. after a while you stop rolling your shoulders when she asks a new question and settle into conversation with her. and after a few hours you learn more about her too, that her dad is a neurosurgeon and she's following in his footsteps with her pre-med major, but that as soon as she tried hockey she knew she wanted to do it forever. she tells you that she doesn't really like drinking, she knows most of the people on the other women's sports teams, that she used to date owen-

you choke on a sip of your vodka and nora pats your back with a chuckle. you were definitely off your game tonight. but besides that hiccup you have to admit talking to them is enjoyable. even their friend manny comes over and dares you to do shots with him and you were seriously about to do it before the girls talked you out of it.

over the next few weeks, you talk more and more to the anderson girl, to the point where you're staying up at night to talk to her over the phone and waking up to your roommate giggling in your face. once she was so tired after a game she started snoring and you would not let her forget it. just like she wouldn't let you forget the time you got wasted at a sorority party, got on top of the kitchen island, and danced to a city girls' song before she set you back on the floor.

you wouldn't ever admit it out loud, hell you had barely admitted it to yourself, but you had started to catch feelings for abby. there was nothing more mebarrasing and cliche to you than falling for your straight friend, and you really didnt want to be on eof those girls who did so. but in your defense, it was really hard not to. she was annoyingly pretty, lord knows how many times youe admired the freckles dusting her cheeks down to her shoulders. she was strong and smart and every other positive character trait your brain could conure up.

but the worst thing was just how nice she was to you.

in hindsight, the way everything fell into place was honestly the dumbest thing ever. you were at a county fair leah had heard about and asked you to come with her along with jordan and abby. obviously, the couple went in their own direction after a while, which left you and abby to wander around getting on the different rides and getting your reaction to abby eating her first-ever funnel cake. but then it was later, and the two of you had stopped at one of those rigged pop up games and you bet her twenty bucks that she wouldn't win, and if there was one thing you knew about abby it was that she took bets very seriously, so when she won and had to pick her prize you were a little confused when she picked your favorite animal and handed it to you.

when you asked her how she knew it was your favorite, all she could say was 'you said they were cool a few times and they're your profile picture on your private instagram, so i just put the pieces together.'

you went home and didnt talk to her for a week. or at least you tried to, because after a weekend of ignoring her calls and convincing tonya to bring you meals from the lunch hall the blonde girl banged her fist on your door and basically demanded you tell her what your problem was.

"i don't see what the big fucking deal is. i'm allowed a little bit of space from you, abigail."

she scoffed and you could see her tongue bunch in the corner of her mouth before her body pushed past yours until she was standing in the middle of your room.

"i'm not saying you can't have space and you know im not. i mean, one second we're having a good time together and then you just shut me out for no reason. if i did something wrong i need you to tell me. i can't read your damn mind, y/n."

sometimes it feels like you can, you think with a snort, feeling slightly embarrassed by the angry look on her face. you collect yourself and cross your arms over your chest. "i just don't feel like talking to you right now, so if you could please get out now-"

"nope. not gonna leave until you tell me what's wrong."

sometimes you could forget just how damn stubborn she was. it mostly popped up on the ice, and you had once overheard her coach say that if she wasn't such a great player she'd be benched most of the time.

"do you realize how annoying you're being right now?"

"don't care."

"i don't give a shit if you have muscles, i can still kick your ass."

"i'd really like to see you try, princess."

you groan and cover your face, but not before raising them in a choking gesture. you walk backward and sit on your bed, trying to take a breather before anderson follows you and resting on the ground in front of you, her large palms smoothing up and down your thighs.

"please, y/n, just...just tell me what i did and i'll fix it, i promise."

you've never been one to cry. or maybe you had been when you were a young child before your father taught you that 'crying doesn't achieve success, at least not the kind you want.' but you can see how much abby cares about you in her eyes and you know that despite you being unreasonable she'll put up with it anyway. your eyes start to sting and you rest your head in the crook of her neck.

she doesn't force you to say anything more than you want, rubbing the expanse of your back while another hand gently pats your head. after a long minute, you pull your head up and find that the space between your two faces is almost nonexistent, your eyes dart from her eyes to her lips, and before you can say anything else her hand is on the back of your neck and she's bringing your lips down to hers.

its soft and sweet and her lips are soft and feel like heaven against yours, and she doesn't give you a second to be confused about what's happening because she's making the kiss deeper and pulling your body closer to hers by putting her arms under yours and pressing you in by the back of your shoulders. you throw your arms over her shoulders and behind her neck and decide that you're going to enjoy this moment for as long as you can.

but eventually, you need to breathe, pulling your head back and letting out a shaky breath of air when abby just moves her ministrations to your neck, sucking and biting on the skin until it bruises.

"i..i thought you were straight." is all you can manage to voice, the feeling of her body pressed into yours and her teeth nipping at your neck making your mind hazy.

she laughs and kisses your neck a few times before looking you in the eyes. "well, i never actually said i was, you just assumed so."

"seriously? you dated owen? he's the dullest straight girl choice i've ever met. and we live in washington" you scoffed.

"yeah, well. that was a long time ago. i've moved on to bigger and better things."

she plants a big overdramatic kiss on your cheek, repeating so on the other side of your face until she can see your smile and hear you giggle. when you both calm down a little she backs up and wears a more serious look on her face.

"i care about you. more than i've cared about anyone before." she smiles, her thumb rubbing over the back of one of your hands. "except maybe my dad, obviously. and nora, she was kinda my best friend before you. but you get what im trying to say."

you laugh and nod at her. "i understand. i...like you too. a lot."

"geez, you're seriously emotionally stunted. but i'll take what i can't get, you'll warm up to me eventually." she slaps her hands on your thighs, ignoring the annoyed look on your face before scooching your body up until you're laying down on your bed, her body gently flopping down onto yours.

"abby! get the hell off, you're wearing your outside clothes!"

"cmon, just five more minutes."

and as much as you complained during those five minutes, you both knew you didnt mind that much.

after that things were really nice. at least for the most part. you were officially abby's girlfriend, which she had asked if you wanted to be the day after you two semi-confessed your feelings. she knew that this kind of commitment was new to you, and the last time it didn't go so well for her, so you both decided it'd be best to take it slow.

(slow meaning you did everything you two did before with the added bonus of making out whenever you wanted. you weren't complaining.)

but keeping things on the down low was a bit of a struggle. abby was a huge fan of pda, always found hugging one of her teammates after a successful game or cuddling with someone on movie nights. she would hug you when you were just friends, but now that you were comfortable with her touching you more in private it started to bleed into public life, her hand looking for yours when walking around or giving you a kiss on the cheek after you aced another test.

the next problem was your friends. you had told nora over a late night phone call while manny had found out when he had walked into the living room of his and abbys shared dorm and found the two of you with your shirts off and kissing on the couch, shouting in both spanish and english about how his eyes burned but he was happy for you both.

you both knew you could trust the two of them with your 'secret', but you didn't expect that end-of-the-year party owen and manny decided to invite you both to.

it was a mix of things really. you were going to just spend time with your friends and nothing more, but you were feeling really pent up. when you and abby decided to take things slow, that also meant sex. which at first was all right with you, hookups were a lot different than sharing yourself with someone you really cared about. but abby was just so effortlessly hot, and now since hockey season was over she had more time to spend with you and it was driving you up the damn wall. it got to the point that you found yourself nearly always on the brink of an orgasm when after a long day she'd press you into her bed and kiss you until you felt dizzy.

so when she decided to go to the party in a tight long-sleeved top and a normal pair of jeans, you definitely should not have been all over her as you were.

(to be fair. she was also on you like white on rice. you had decided to don a tube top with a mini skirt, figuring it couldn't hurt to dress up a little for a simple party. especially since it made your girlfriend look at you like she wanted to eat you alive.)

after mingling a bit and getting yourself a drink, you meet up with some of your friends and start to talk to leah about some drama in one of her classes when abby rejoins you, moving your body so your body is resting into hers. you aren't used to such a public display of affection, but this alcohol is blurring any desire you had to hide that she was yours and you were hers.

"god, you guys are so cute together it makes me sick." nora laughs into her red solo cup, shaking her head at your adorable but annoying affection.

leah's eyebrows scrunch up and she starts to pinch at your arm. "wait, am i missing something? you two are dating?"

at that point, some other people were listening in and looking in at the two of you, including none other than owen moore. now, you and moore were always cordial, but you wouldn't call him a good friend like you would the others. you always felt that whenever he saw or heard about you abby spending time together or heard about how close you two had gotten so quickly, he would smile silently while staring at you like he wanted to burn lasers through your brain.

and he was doing the exact same thing now, his grip on his bear so tight you feared the glass would break. somehow you were the only one who noticed.

"yes, we're together. finally managed to convince this one that jocks aren't just big dumb idiots a few weeks ago." abby's talking breaks you out of your thoughts, her arms snaking around your waist and pulling you to sit on her lap.

you cant help but roll your eyes. "i never once said that."

"well you were thinking it. i could tell."

some of the people who you didnt know and who were friends of friends said congrats, how cute they thought the two of you were, etc. it kind of weirds you out to have all these people paying attention to you just because of who you were with, but abby's quips to any weird remarks you didn't want to acknowledge made you feel better about anything.

but later on, when the two of you are unseriously dancing in the living room, owen comes over and asks abby to talk in private, leaving you to dance with some girls you recognized from the last party. but after three songs pass and abby still hasn't come back, you get a weird feeling in your chest and decide to go looking for the two. you head upstairs and down a few hallways before you hear two voices in a heated argument, and after numerous visits to her games, you can recognize abby's yelling anywhere.

before you can knock on the door to ask if something is wrong, it opens and you see a red-faced owen, not even saying anything before he knocks into your shoulder and goes back downstairs, clearly ignoring your call of 'fucking dick' to his back.

you scoff and shake your head, turning back around to say something to abby before you slightly step back at the look on her face. its dark, like if owen didn't leave she would have kicked his ass first, and now it's trained at you. you know she'd never hurt you, though. partially because she cares about you too much, and partially because you always keep a taser in your back pocket whenever you go to a party.

"abby? what's wrong? did he fucking say something to you?

she laughs before grabbing your arm and pulling you into the room, shutting the door behind you and locking it. her long legs take seconds to reach the bed, her arm releasing when your body sits and bounces slightly on the bed as she stands above you.

"its...its nothing, just owen being a dick like always."

her voice is strained and her hands are tensing into fists, telltale signs that she was really pissed off. you hold her hands in yours, pressing little kisses to her knuckles. normally you hated being so sappy, but you knew that being cute with her was a quick way to calm her down.

"don't worry. i can guarantee one of these days someone is gonna kick his ass. unless i do it first, and you know i want to." you joke and smile when she laughs, gripping her hands so she can sit on the bed next to you.

"yeah, youre right."

"im always right. you should learn that if you wanna stick with me."

she shakes her head before looking at you in silence, and you feel your face get hot under her gaze. you'd never admit it to her but seeing her so angry really did something for you. the bottom of your leg rubs against hers, and her eyes dart down before trailing up your legs to the point where your skirt is starting to ride up your bare thighs.

"here, babe? seriously?"

you sigh, figuring she was right and having your first time together in some stranger's house during a party was horribly tacky. you start to move your leg before she grabs it and puts it on the bed before grabbing you and resting you in her lap.

"i didn't tell you to stop."

so yes, you did get tacky in a strangers house. and back in abby's dorm. and again after you both showered.

so if there was one thing you could ever thank owen for, it was finally giving you both the push you needed to take the next step in your relationship. but after that night things were a little strained, as abby and owen were on a no-contact basis, their fight having something to deal with them and maybe you although she wouldn't go into details, which just led to this drama also spreading to mel since she was dating owen and was always pretty neutral when it came to you and tense when it came to abby, and mel was close friends to leah who was now close to you and...

it was complicated.

but you were used to not having people around. you had abby, nora, manny, and tonya, and that was all you really needed. speaking of tonya, you don't think you've ever seen anyone as happy for someone else's relationship as you did when you told tonya that you and abby got together. she said it was 'half happy that you found someone for you and half happy that someone will finally get the stick out of your ass.'

but your bliss was partially broken when your mother called a week after you had your last finals to let you know she and her father were going to be visiting seattle to talk to you about something important. at this point you hadn't talked to either of your parents since winter when your dad had not so discreetly told you he would be on your ass about skiing again as soon as your leg was alright again. and you were definitely going to dread every minute you had to spend trying to cordial to them, don't even mention finally introducing them to your girlfriend who you so far had never told them about.

for a few days after the call, you must have been acting weird because abby could tell something was wrong and took you to a relaxing little cafe she had found when she first got to the city. you're sipping on a milkshake while abby does the same across from you, digging into her stack of blueberry pancakes, waiting for you to tell her what's going on while she talks about her schedule now that school is out.

"manny's gonna be gone for a month because of his music internship, so i was wondering if you wanted to come and stay at mine while he's gone. we can watch movies, dance to music, or we can practice those recipes i saw on tiktok."

"mhm, that sounds nice, babe." you continue to at least show minimal attention to what she's saying, briefly slurping at your shake until she speaks again.

"yup. but after that, i might have to leave for a while, i haven't seen my dad in forever and he wanted me to stay for two weeks while my aunt is visiting salt lake."

her words slowly die out when she notices how you stop slurping your drink, your eyes staring into space as your thumb scratches at your palm.

throughout your relationship, you had told abby the rundown of your relationship with your parents maybe once. at first, it was because it was a touchy subject and you would be embarrassed if she knew the reason for the way you acted the way you did and thought your baggage was too much for her.

and then it was because deep down you were jealous. they had their ups and downs, but abby had such a pure relationship with her father that sometimes it made you sick. while he didnt flaunt his wealth because of his principles, but abby would tell you about all the times when she was younger that her dad would give her the best birthday parties, take her with him to conferences around the world, and made sure she had anything she desired.

so when you had to tell her that the most your dad did was give you a break to be a normal adult instead of shaping you into a champion, you don't think there was ever a time that you secretly envied her more.

"this is about your dad, isn't it?" she whispered, reaching across the table to take your hand in hers. you nodded, relieved that your girlfriend could read you like a book and you didnt have to say it out loud.

"could you tell me more about it?"

shit.

you sighed, a deep breath leaving your body and clearing your head.

"my parents are gonna be here soon. said they wanted to talk to me about something "important", which means my dad thinks i've had enough time to recover from my leg being nearly snapped in two because he thinks he knows better than the doctor. but hey, maybe when i was gone he got another fuckin degree to throw in my face."

while you ranted abby never said a word, just paying close attention and providing you comfort. out of everyone in the crew, she was always the person people went to talk to when they needed it. she said it was something she got from her mom.

"all my life he's been like this. just pushing me and pushing me until im at the point of breaking until i use my anger to win. there's no doubt he's still doing it. heard my brother is being scouted at his games and he's only fifteen."

abby nods and presses a kiss to your hand, treading carefully with what she says next. "your dad sounds...horrible, honestly. he never...hit you did he?"

you feel your body jerk back and both of your eyes go big at your reaction.

"no, no he would never. im serious. wouldn't make sense from a logical standpoint, id be in front of other people all the time and any injuries would fuck up my skiing."

"well that's a bleak way of looking at it, but im glad he didnt. but the other shit is still bad."

"yeah. definitely not looking forward to dealing with that again in two weeks."

"i know, but im here, and im gonna stick by you every step of the way, alright? even if your parents find out they hate me and curse my bloodline."

you couldn't help but snort at her. "nobody could hate you, anderson. you would annoy them too much and make dirty bets against them."

"what? that wasn't a dirty bet! you'd just never seen my skills before and i used it to my advantage."

"whatever you say abs."

abbys reassurance and patience helped greatly, and by the time you met your parents at their hotel for breakfast, you weren't nervous about whatever bullshit they had to say.

but for some odd reason, they were very cordial. your mom asked you about school, how your grades were, and how you liked your chosen major. when it got to the point if you were seeing anyone, you not so subtly gushed about abby and she seemed really happy for you. your dad even praised you for picking another sportsman, avoiding your look while he ate his eggs.

a week later you even had the courage to introduce them to abby, who told you she would cook something for all of you to eat.

that tiktok recipe she was talking about? it was ratatouille. and you had to admit it was delicious, and you wondered how abby was so good at so many things and she told you when she was a kid she wanted to learn how to do basically everything and her dad was more than happy to indulge her. sometimes you really wondered how she didn't appear to be so spoiled.

but your girl was nothing if not a charmer, and by the end of the night your mom was gushing over how much she liked abby and thought she was a great match for you.

your dad was...your dad. he acted polite, asking abby about her intentions, if she was dedicated to her studies and sports and you at the same time. blah blah blah. abby gave perfect human resources-like answers that she knew would make you giggle and loosen up.

once dinner was over your mother insisted on staying a little while longer to watch a movie, finding out she and your girlfriend both had soft spots for mamma mia and grease and planned to drink some wine and let loose for once. while the two were watching meryl streep panic on screen your dad tapped you on the shoulder and asked if he could speak to you in private, and you were mentally prepared to get into yet another argument.

"i know i'm the last person who gets to say this but..you've seemed to have really grown this past year. I'm proud of you."

"thanks. i guess."

he sighs, shifting on his feet. "i know i've always been hard on you and your brothers. i just-i knew that if you had guidance you could be phenomenal at whatever you do."

"yeah, dad, but that doesn't mean forcing me to train for ten hours a day when i was still in third grade." you could list more instances of him being overbearing and partially ruining your childhood, but you don't feel like being the person who makes the conversation go sour.

"i know. trust me, i know. look, your mother has us going to a shrink and...one of the steps is asking for forgiveness and whatever mumbo jumbo."

you almost snort but pass it off as a sneeze. your dad in therapy was about as believable as a talking donkey.

"well, it's nice to hear dad but it's not gonna be just as easy as being nice to me and my girlfriend for a night."

"i know. which is why i wanted to show you this."

he pulls out and his phone and after a few taps shows you an article. you read the word 'olympics' and nearly blow before he cuts you off.

"just listen, alright? one of the big coaches was caught and fired for doping a bunch of the players, so they're postponing the winter games for another few years for investigations to see if there's any more misconduct."

"are you serious?"

"deadly. and i know with your leg and your schooling you'll have your hands full but, i figured the best way i knew how to bond with you was to help you. it'd be enough time to get extensive physical therapy and train up. but only if you want to."

"dad, i. i really don't know what to say."

"you don't have to say anything, at least not now. just promise me you'll think about it, alright? and if by next spring you still don't want to, I'll never bring it back up again."

after that, your mother comes and says they should get going to get enough sleep for their flight tomorrow, and you bid your parents goodbye with stiff hugs and a genuine smile.

for the next few months into your sophomore year your on the fence. when you were a kid, despite the pain and the tears and the bruises, there was nothing you loved more than skiing. you swear that the adrenaline rushes you would get speeding down slopes were better than anything you've ever experienced, even sex.

(when abby heard you say that one night on the couch, she pouted and wouldn't touch you for a week, telling you to go back to those stupid slopes if that's how you felt.)

but the point was that you were basically going through a beginning life crisis. either stick with the new normal you've created and potentially miss out on fulfilling your childhood dreams, or take a risk and potentially come out more damaged than before.

you were planning on spending the next thanksgiving mulling it over, but to your shock baby invited you to come with her to her dad's house for thanksgiving with her family. when checking in with her to see if she and her dad would be ok with this big step, she told you it was actually her dad's idea and she'd be more than happy to have you meet her family.

you swear to god you have never been more nervous on a plane than you were on the flight to salt lake, only being soothed by the constant free drinks you get in first class, the six hundred page book in your hands, and abbys large hand constantly rubbing on your thigh and back. you suggested that you both join the mile-high club as a joke and she seemed a little too into it.

"babe please, i promise ill be quick. i can even put my fingers in your mouth."

"abby, i was just joking. im not gonna do that and get kicked off the plane. god, you're so fuckin weird."

"you make me weird. pretty please? ill pull out the puppy eyes."

"i really don't give a fuck."

and you come to find out that abby's stories were true because her dad is so weirdly nice. he greets you at the airport like he's known you all your life, and is eager to find conversation the whole drive to his house where you both are staying.

you were glad that like you abby had a smaller family, or at least one she spent thanksgiving with. after her father you only had to introduce yourself to her aunt and her small family, a husband who you have to look down at and likes to boast about his coin collection, and three children. the eldest, ashley, was closer in age to you and abby and was clearly abby's favorite cousin. the middle child was a wild child named kris, who didn't seem at all phased that you were a stranger and kept asking you if you'd ever heard of their favorite anime series.

now, you've never been the best with children, you repeatedly told your mother to throw your baby brother in the trash when you were six, but you couldn't help but fawn over abby's baby cousin lyle, the cutest infant you've ever seen who after a few hours of fussing because of the time change, he calms down into a smiling drooling little thing who, although he keeps tugging at your hair when his mom hands you to him, seemed to actually enjoy your presence and laughs like its the funniest thing ever.

you didnt catch the way abby looked at you fondly while you were playing around with her cousin or the way she swatted her father away when he called her out on it.

so thanksgiving was easy, a peaceful week full of meeting kind people and eating some surprisingly good food. but you didn't even get a week of peace after before abby brought it up.

christmas.

yes the holiday was full of joy and warmth when you were a child. but after a mini teenage rebellion and your energy you just...gave up on the holiday completely. last year you spent it alone inside your dorm which wasn't the worst thing on earth. you got to watch corny feel-good movies like national lampoons, drink hot chocolate with extra marshmallows, and had free reign to the library since the librarian apparently used to watch your games on tv. it wasn't like it used to be, but it was enough.

"so, you're coming with us to the cabin right?" nora reaches across the library table and takes one of your fries from the fast food you sneaked in. for some reason she refused to order her own fries, content to pluck the ones from your container.

"what? what cabin?"

"god, abby hasn't told you about this by now? i thought she would have taken you there already and made it her love shack or something." she quickly ducks her head when you toss a burnt fry at her, looking around to make sure no one saw. "it's her dad's cabin at one of the ski ranges in the mountains, she invites us every year for christmas break or new years if we can't make it."

"first, you're a perv. second, i don't know why she hasn't told me about it. id probably tease her for it anyway."

"well when you see her next ask her, because you definitely have to come with us this year."

"i don't know, nors. you know how i feel about skiing right now..."

"you don't have to ski! we literally never do, as sad as it is. we just hang out, go out for drinks, and hit the skiing town. im telling you cold resort parties are insane."

you take a minute to mull it over, staring into space as you tap your fingers on the hardwood table. nora fingers tap on the top of your hand.

"i understand you're going through things, with your dad and all. you don't have to come if you don't want to. but i know we'd really enjoy it if you came, especially abby."

you nod and eat another fry before gegging back to the novel you were reading, some 'all-time classic' abby had said you had to read.

you saw abby a few hours after that, yet again staying the night at her dorm to kick off the following weekend. when you entered using your spare key the smell of chinese food instantly hit you, and it took you by surprise since abby normally insisted on cooking for you and manny.

you set down your things and kicked off your shoes before heading into the little kitchenette, hearing the sound of rather loud whispers that stopped as soon the roommates saw you, noodles stuffed into both of their mouths.

"what the fuck are yall starin at?"

manny snorts before making some weird excuse for leaving, telling you he's meeting up with some meteorology student at a bar and he won't be home until tomorrow. you bid him. a quick goodbye before turning back to abby, the blonde picking through her food.

its only then that you notice the gauze wrapped around her palm, quickly cross the threshold to gently but firmly raise her hand up to your face to observe it.

your about to go on a triade when you see that sad pout on her face.

"tell me who did this to you." you grumble, putting on a fake deep voice.

she chuckles and shakes her head. "you're so weird."

"only because of you. tell me what happened."

"i was trying to cook before we ordered takeout and i just...got distracted and burned my hand. its not a big deal, don't worry about it."

you tell by the way her shoulders were tensing that she was getting into one of her moods, always hating when she failed at something and hating even more when people kept asking her about it.

"well im always gonna worry about, something that's also your fault by the way. what made you distracted."

"nothing."

"abs."

"please just drop it."

"abigail."

she groans before slumping her head into her arms on the counter.

so you decide to drop it. at least for a little while. you put away the rest of the food, deciding to eat the box she bought for you after her mood had been resolved before figuring you'd leave her alone while you took a shower.

but if there was one thing you knew about abby, it was that she took 'golden retriever energy' to a whole nother level. aka most of the time she couldn't leave you alone and followed you near everywhere. after only a few minutes, you heard the shower door open and felt her large arms circle around your waist and her head rest on your shoulders.

"i wanna ask you something. there's this cabin my dad owns that we all head to for winter break and stuff-"

you felt your heart skip a beat. to be honest part of the reason you were nervous about abby asking you this was because you were second-guessing yourself and your relationship. you hadn't even been together for a full year at this point, and even if you knew you loved her and that she adored you, you didnt want to be the one to bring up this thing she does with people she's known for years and get your heart damaged.

"and i wanted to invite you to go with us because i just know youd make it feel so much more special."

"i feel like a 'but' goes at the end of that sentence."

she rubs her head into your shoulder more, kissing at the soft and wet skin of your shoulder blade.

"i didn't tell you much. about my fight with owen. but everyone knows we haven't been talking much, but he's still been my friend since elementary, and i was hoping that maybe during the trip we could resolve things. but if he ever said something to you or about you i think id go fucking crazy."

your turn around and hold her head in your hands. her body is still slumped so her head is more at your level and her pretty blue eyes stare right into yours.

"i appreciate that. your slight anger issues make me feel honored." a smile quirks on her face and she nuzzles her head into your palms more. "and as much as he pisses me off, i don't know how i feel about causing a greater rift between you and your friends. ive only been with you less than a hear, he's known you for-"

"year or not doesn't matter. you mean...so much to me i can't put into words. the only reason i was nervous all day was that i didnt know how to make this sound like i wasn't putting him before you because i wouldn't. ever."

you look at her a bit longer, swiping away wet pieces of her hair back from her face so you can see all of her. because she's looking at you like she can do the same.

you both take an intimate shower without a word, helping the other bathe and lather her hair in apricot shampoo she's become addicted to. once you exit, dry off, and change into some matching fluffy pajamas she bought for you both, you finally head back to the kitchen to eat your food before turning on a movie.

it was only because you both decided to choose some random movie that the stupid thought crossed into your mind.

"could you imagine if we were that touchy all the time? we're already halfway there and it drives your friends nuts." you poked her cheek while you were resting on her, her arm wrapped around your shoulders while your legs intertwined on the couch.

"what do you mean?"

"just like, overdoing it. always with an arm around the other, making eyes across the room. if you wanna get extreme you could carry me on your back."

"or i could carry you on my front."

the shift of her hips and the tone of her voice makes you turn your head to look at her, nearly busting out laughing at the way her eyes are glued to the screen while she chews on her lower lip.

"stop doing that."

"doing what? im watching the movie. watch the movie with me."

"this is just like on the plane. y'know i was kidding about the exhibitionist thing at first-"

"baby, please."

"please what?"

she groaned while you just giggled at her, moving your bodies so she was sitting up on the couch and you were on top of her, adjusting your hips so you were straddling her waist.

"what're you thinking about, bunny?"

a subtle whine escaped from her throat and you smirked in triumph. there was nothing your girl loved more than being called the softest and cutest pet names, and you would frequently use it to your advantage, like the time when she refused to help you cheat on a test 'on principle' and you rested your face on her thigh from under the desk with a 'please, princess?' and she happily gave you the answers after roughly grinding herself on your tongue.

"i just...maybe if we played it up at the cabin owen would finally fuck off and realize im yours. i just thought it'd be funny."

you felt a warm feeling in your chest at the thought, showing your girl all the affection she craved from you on an idyllic vacation while also showing that dick owen who's boss. maybe then he'd finally let whatever his issue with you go. or not. at this point you didnt care.

"ok. we can do it."

"what? are you serious? i was half joking. i don't wanna make you do anything you don't want to-"

you cut off her sweet rambles with a press of your lips to hers. her arms brought you in closer until your breasts were squished into hers.

when abby texted the group chat the next morning next to you in bed to let the others know you'd be joining, you couldn't help but feel warm at the replies.

manny : thank god, i need a drinking partner since no one ever wants irish hot chocolate

leah : because the last time you made it you got drunk by five pm and kept singing baby its cold outside while doing both parts

jordan : and badly

manny : haters

nora : omg thank god

nora : this is all because of me btw

nora : tell y/n we're gonna have sooo much fun

manny : wait is she gonna ski

jordan : stop.

you giggled at your friends' antics. you were already imagining all the crazy things that would happen on the trip and happily listened to all the stories abby had to tell you.

mel : cant wait for the trip! hoping ben's is still open.

owen : 👍🏻

a snort escaped from you. "oh hes so pissed."

"definitely." abby agreed before turning the phone off and snuggling into your neck to relax for a little while longer. "prepare, he's probably just gonna get angrier from our masterful plan."

"technically my plan. and are you sure you still wanna do it? i don't wanna drive a wedge between you guys."

"he started that at that party. either he's gonna deal with me changing for the better or im gonna leave him in the dust. now shush, im going to sleep."

your hand smooths through abby's locks as she drifts back into sleep, and you soon follow her into it, dreaming of pale snow and the sight of the slopes.

the nex two weeks before break starts you're horrifically busy, finishing up some tests while also buying and packing everything you'll need for the trip. which is really just an excuse for you to get a bunch of those cute thick sweaters you saw on ebay but that's neither here nor there.

once your last class was finished abby immediately called an uber to take you to the airport, citing that as the host she always headed to the cabin earlier than everyone else to fix it up and stock up on little things, everyone would need or forget like extra blankets and lots and lots of water. during the trip to the airport, waiting in the airport since you were both 'get there hours before the flight' girls, and on the flight itself, abby was telling you stories of the cabin and what has happened on the past few trips that you should know about.

apparently, the cabin (in aspen, which you teased her was so basic) was bought by her grandparents (more teasing) for family trips when her dad was little. but as his siblings got older and started their own families the trips dwindled down, until his parents decided to just leave the place to him, telling him not to sell it for anything since it was worth a fat load of cash by now. hed take abby and her mom there before she passed, and then once she turned sixteen told her he trusted her enough to bring her friends up there if they could.

"honestly, i think it was part of him being nice and feeling sad we didn't spend much time together then. we were still mourning and he was always working." she sinks into her first-class seat, sipping on her complimentary ginger ale can. "but we're better now, and i get to have a laid-back vacation with my friends every year."

"sounds like a win-win to me. traumatic way you got there and all."

"you of all people saying that is hilarious, truly."

a few hours of talking and napping later and you've landed in colorado, a rental car waiting for you in the airport parking lot.

"abs, you are so secretly bougie. like, why didn't you rent a private car that time yours was in the shop and we were stuck in the rain downtown?"

"it's for emergencies and the necessary."

driving through the roads of aspen snowmass is something close to magical. at this point, the sun has set and the twinkling lights of the villages are everywhere, and you can see a plethora of christmas decorations inside shop windows.

when abby parks outside of the cabin your jaw is close to dropping, and you have to hold it up once you step inside. there was obviously a lot of wood, making up the floors, walls, and beams that connect both. but it was also decorated with relaxed brown and cream furniture.

"i want you to know if we get married, im not signing a prenup."

abby cackles before sneaking up behind you and tickling your waist, cackling at your shriek followed by a scowl.

"'if' babe, really? nice to know you're so committed."

"i'll be more committed if you give me a tour of this place."

the cabin was big, of course. enough bedrooms for your whole group and a few more. you honestly couldn't pick your favorite. there was a game room with a pool table you were just itching to beat jordan and leah at, a hot tub outside on the deck looking down onto the village that looked like the perfect place to drink champagne with nora talking shit about her recent ex.

"now, this is what i really wanted you to see," abby smiles before pushing open a wide set of doors on the upper floor and revealing to you the grand bedroom. there's a giant bed against the back wall, with a warm little nook tucked into a bay window.

"it's so nice here abs, really. i can't wait for everyone to get here so we can start doing stuff." you drop your bags by the front of the bed and flop your behind onto it, loving the way it bounces you up and down a bit. and you can tell that abby also loves it by the way she's staring at the way your boobs jiggle.

"im glad you like it, baby. but we don't have to wait for the others to get here to have some fun." a pervy little smile lights up her face and she starts inching towards you, making stupid little grabby hands as she does so.

"you're insatiable. aren't we supposed to be making sure this place is ready for everyone else?"

"wasn't it your idea for us to play everything up for fun? that includes sex. a lot of it. strap-ons are allowed on planes, by the way. and other things."

"...seriously?"

"seriously."

at this point, her arms are caging you into the plush of the comforter, and you don't know whether to look at the veins in her arms or her eyes or her mouth-

"you're staring, pretty."

"well you're all i can see, gorgeous."

she presses a soft kiss to the underside of your chin, her tounge poking out to lick down your neck.

"god, abs, please."

"please what?"

you groan and she just laughs at you.

the hardest part of being a switch was that abby could just throw shit back in your face when she became more dominant. it was both infuriating and arousing.

“im not gonna say it."

"you sure?" her large hand slips beneath the band of your pants until its resting over your underwear, teasing you.

"yes i a-am!" your refusal is cut off when two of her thick fingers slide inside of you, filling you up in the most delicious way. it doesn't help your case that there's no restriction, the wetness between your thighs letting her know just how much you were enjoying this.

"y'know, your master plan isn't exactly gonna work if you have an attitude with me, baby." her words are gravelly as she speakes into the crease of your neck, occasionally looking up at you to ingrain your reactions into her memory.

"god, abs."

"this is one the things i love most about you acting like a brat, just means i get to fuck and love on you until it goes away. and i've got all the time in the fuckin world."

just when you start getting close to your orgasm, you could've sworn in the distance you heard the sound of a door opening before closing a few minutes later. the feeling of abby kissing you and adding a third finger inside of you. you decided to just drop it

later on, after a nice long shower and putting on this cute warm sweater you bought, you and abby decided it was time to head out and get enough groceries to last for around two weeks until everyone else would arrive and decide what meals they would want after. it was very entertaining to watch abby standing in a fluorescently lit market aisle decide if she wanted to make a giant chicken pot pie or some creamy chicken soup one of her teammates told her about. she just stuck her tongue out when you looked at her.

once you returned to the cabin you could hear some music coming from inside the house, and despite your initial worry abby just smiled and rushed inside, your brain seriously wondering if you had chosen correctly romantically.

you headed inside with a few of the bags, setting them on the kitchen counters before heading to the source of the music that appeared to be coming from the living room. once you cross the threshold you are happily surprised to see your girlfriend and manny talking and laughing in the middle of the room.

"ah! nice to know abs hasn't broken you already." manny comes over to give you a big hug before setting you down and shaking your shoulders, just laughing when you start smacking his hands.

"jeez, what is with you guys? be normal."

"you forget im abby's roommate. this is because of you. you gave me this trauma."

you roll your eyes before patting him on the shoulder.

"ok, ok. why did you come early? when do the others get here?" abby asks from her place still on the couch.

"what, i cant just come because i love and miss two of my best friends."

the room is silent as you both stare at him.

"well just so you know, that was half true. but also," he looks down a dark hallway before tugging you closer to the couch so he can speak quietly. "mel and owen are here."

you blink. "thats...odd."

"very odd, but maybe it's a good thing? who knows, maybe owen's gotten over the whole fight and wants to put it to bed." abby turns to you, those big blue eyes filled with hope that you don't have the heart to squash with a joke.

"yeah, maybe."

"well if he did do that, i don't think he's in the mood for it now." manny chuckles.

"why not?"

"he was confused to see a car in the driveway, so he came by two hours ago and left like two minutes later. his face was as red as a tomato, you know how he looks when he's flushed."

oh my god.

you turned to abby and her cheeks were puffed, a clear sign she was trying not to laugh.

well, it looks like your plan was already working.

the next three days were more laid back, just spent taking a chance to relax and sleep in after your grueling semester. you decided to spend these days exploring more of the cabin, admiring all of the rooms and the random really pretty art pieces on some of the walls.

you swore that nothing could beat the bliss you felt on that second day, waking up to the faint sun in your eyes and abby gently snoring next to you, deciding to cook up a bunch of waffles, one of the meals you excelled at, and read a four hundred page book on the sofa.

(the plan was still in motion at this point, just more tame.

once jordan, leah, and nora came things really took a turn for the exciting. after hearing that you'd been cooped in the house these past few days, leah insisted you come with them to some bars and other hot spots around town. you hadn't been drinking much lately but figured that since you were surrounded by people you trusted and a bunch of strangers you'd be able to handle yourself.

and you did.

for the most part.

you just weren't expecting the bartender to be the chillest girl you've ever met and make a killer strawberry daiquiri, because before you knew it they were playing some old-school song over the speakers and were hanging off of leah's arm like a koala.

"oh my god, im so glad you invited me out. this place rules. have you tried the daiquiris? serenity said she'd make me one more but you can have it."

"her name is trinity, and you're getting touchy. where's abs?"

you shrug and she shakes her head, looking over your shoulders to see if she can spot the hulking blonde. she waves someone over and then abby is in your vision, a soft expression on her face as she tugs your body into hers.

"how much have you had to drink, baby?"

"mmmm, not too much. i could walk in a gay line. look, i even made a corny joke!"

"yes, you did." she squats down a little bit and you wrap your arms around her neck and your legs around her waist, trying to restrain yourself from making any noises when she lifts you with ease to the amusement of some of the people in the bar.

"how about we head back and take a long bath, pretty. ill even try those rose face masks you bought."

you were about to agree when out of the corner of your eye you catch owen, sitting inside a booth with jordan and manny, sparing looks in your direction.

you smirk down at her and she can already guess what you're thinking, tightening her grip on your hips.

"or we can do that later. and dance now."

you nod and loosen your legs for her to drop you but she just holds you tighter for a moment, leaning her head up to place a heated kiss on your lips before pulling away, fighting to ignore the tiny string of spit that connects your lips to hers.

"ok. now we can dance."

abby told you the next day that owen had asked to talk to her one on one in the morning and she didn't really understand what it meant. he apologized for lashing out at her, apparently, but still didnt agree with some of the 'drastic changes to her personality' that were happening lately.

you really tried to promise her that you wouldn't cuss him out, telling you she'd handle it later after having a conversation with manny to figure out when the hell he started acting like this.

focus on tried.

you and nora were in the kitchen that night making cups of hot chocolate, taking the chance to top them with all the stuff you weren't allowed to as a child. also probably increasing your risks of cavities, but whatever, it was nostalgic. you were laughing at the absurd abundance of whipped cream in her mug and the three candy canes in yours when you heard footsteps coming into the kitchen, looking over to see owen looking over some things in the fridge.

you looked at nora. she looked at you.

"so owen, how are things going with mel?"

his hand pauses over some leftover noodles, gripping it with a fist.

"we're great actually, thanks for asking norsie."

noras eye twitches, bumping into your shoulder before leaving the room to rest in the kitchen and wait for you before starting a movie.

owen turns and suddenly its just the two of you. staring at each other. you with a three-caned hot cocoa and he with a tupperware of linguine.

"what's your fucking problem."

his eyebrows shoot up, almost like he wasn't expecting you to actually bring up the tension at hand.

"y/n, is this really the time-"

"yes, it is the goddamn time to ask you why you've been acting like a dick to me and my girlfriend."

his mouth quirks downwards and you nearly laugh at the realization of the words, the glances, how he would look at abby sometimes like a kicked puppy even when his damn girlfriend sat on his lap, it was all because he couldn't move the fuck on.

"seriously? that's the reason? you've been putting me, putting abby through hell because you're still hung up over her? this is my worst gay nightmare."

"it's because ever since she's been with you shes been different, always acting like she's some better person now that she's over me. like i was the thing holding her back. how do you think that makes me feel, huh?"

you stare at him after his quiet outburst, his face that signature shade of pink and his eyes enraged. but he doesn't scare you.

you walk closer to him, entertained by the way she avoids you like the plague, and presses his back into the refrigerator. you want to lash out more, to scream at him until your throat is sore, to whisper all the little flaws about him you've noticed over the past year that are driving everyone away, but you won't.

"i hope it makes you feel like the heap of shit you are. goodnight, moore."

when abby feels you snuggle into her later that night, feeling your hands squeeze into her stomach from behind you, she asks if everything is ok, and you press a kiss to her cheek and tell her to go back to sleep.

the next morning it's christmas eve, and everyone is in the dining room eating breakfast and talking about how everyone somehow has no plans when you make a suggestion for the day.

"i wanna go hit the slopes today."

you swear most of them look at you like you've grown another head that just started trying to sing the tequila song.

manny continues chewing his eggs before giving you a thumbs up, but you can tell he's secretly been waiting for this. after you first met he asked you if you've ever skied again after your accident and then dropped it when you gave him a death glare. but since you've gotten closer he knows more about how it's not that you can't ski, but almost as if there was a mental block that stopped you from doing so.

"uhm...sure. i can see if we can do that. are you sure you want to?" abby rests her arms on the table and leans her head into yours, trying to give a sense of privacy for your answer.

"i'm not made of glass, abby. it's about time i get back out there. its the only way i'll known for sure about what my dad said."

"what'd your dad say?" mel speaks up from the opposite side of the table, her hand rested over owen's on top of the wood.

you straighten your shoulders. "some stupid doping scandal got the olympics postponed, and my dad said if i wanter he thinks he could get me back in shape by then to apply."

"holy shit! i mean, it's your choice obviously, but that's cool as hell. i think you should do it." jordan exclaims, sipping on his orange juice through a straw.

"wait, what about your leg? you've only had problems with it a couple of times, but is it alright enough to go ski?" nora asks. she was the one who besides abby you've told the most about your skiing problems, and once took you to the pharmacy to pick up your pain meds like it was no hassle.

"it's better if i don't push myself too much, but the blue and reds should be a piece of cake."

you look at abby, and even though she has no idea why you've had this sudden change of heart, she can hear the subtle excitement in your voice and nods her head at you with a smile.

thanks to everyone always waking up at the break of dawn for some reason, you're checked in to the slopes and ready to go only three hours later. jordan and manny even decided to join you and try their hands at the bunny slopes, the rest of the group deciding to find somewhere to sit and relax while they watched you all.

"mama please, you're embarrassing me." manny groans while you tilt his head from side to side to make sure all of the straps for his helmet and goggles are secure. you weren't about to have him getting a concussion and blaming you for bringing him here or the workers for their sloppy job.

"no one knows better ski safety than me. now shush, I'm almost done."

once you were finished you gently smacked his head and headed to the side of where the slope ends, abby beaming at you from over the rail. she was wearing this cute little beanie she bought for the trip and this all-black bomber jacket that made her look so much bigger than she already is.

"hello? babe, did you hear what i said?" abby's hand waves in front of your face bringing you back to focus. you slowly blink and she shakes her head. "you're so weird."

"again, i get that from you."

"whatever." her gloved hand rests on your face and she brings you closer so she can press a soft kiss onto your lips. when she tries to pull away but your arms are wrapping around her neck and pulling her body into yours, starting an impromptu makeout session before jordans wolf call yanks you out of it.

her fingers reach up to push a strand of hair back into your helmet. "are you sure you'll be ok up there? if your leg hurts just pull over to the side and i'll try to come up and help you-"

you cut her off with another kiss. "i'll be fine, princess. don't worry about me. just worry about all those losers I'm gonna show up."

she laughs that cute and loud little laugh of hers and sends you off, waving to you multiple times when she sees you go up the lift.

once you are at the top you go over everything again, making sure all of your equipment is snug, the track in front of you is good, and your skis are tight and before you know it you're standing at the top of the slope breathing heavy and feeling like you're about to have a panic attack.

your head feels like it's on fire and you swear that you are close to passing out when someone taps on your shoulder. you turn around and it's some teen by his face unobstructed by the goggles, a go-pro attached to his helmet.

"hey, sorry if i'm being annoying but, you're y/n l/n right?"

you nod, hoping he can't see the strained expression on your face.

"i just wanted to say that i think you're like, so cool. i saw that video of you training for the super g at thirteen and it changed my life, seriously."

your head felt a bit better at the memory. the adrenaline you got skiing down slopes at top speeds and then dodging the flags your father asked the owners if he could put on the track to help you train. they were nice people, and even let you pick what flags you wanted. a mix of pink and black.

"thank you. i swore that training took everything out of me. but at least i didn't have to worry about how i was doing in algebra."

he laughs and bobs his head. he clears his throat before slightly hopping on his two feet.

"you ok, kid?"

"yes, yeah, i just... ya see i have this youtube channel where i post videos of me riding down the slopes, helping beginners, trying the harder slopes, and stuff like that." he taps the go bro on his helmet. "and i was wondering if you wanted to do like, a friendly little race? i don't know, you don't have to i know you're leg is probably still healing, i can just go if you wa-"

"i'll do it."

his eyes bulge, surprised at your answer. you have to admit you're slightly surprised too. you weren't planning on doing anything more than inching your way down the intermediate slope a few times, but the memory of the super g has energy suddenly rushing through you. besides, it'd be a nice distraction from everything else. your dad. owen. you.

when you both get to the edge of the slope, you let him know you'll give him a twenty-second head start before you follow. he nods, and a few seconds later you're skiing for the first time in years.

and it feels fucking great.

at the speeds you are going the wind is whipping across the unprotected parts of your face, the stinging cold keeping you focused as you turn around trick hills and get your legs used to the feeling of slight strain. but your legs feel fine, and that makes you feel even better.

before long you can see the kid ahead of you and your friends in the close distance, nora's red coat bobbing up and down as she cheers for you. only five seconds after you pass your fan and can hear his slight spluttering before you're bringing your skis to a stop and the ice is flying from underneath them.

your heart is pounding as the kid, who tells you his name is aidan, thanks you for 'kicking his ass, i swear it'll get so many views". he tells you he'll tag you, and you do him one better by saying you'll follow him back and you're a little scared he's about to have a heart attack before he leaves to check in with his parents.

"oh my god oh my god oh my god! that was so fucking cool! i really thought you were gonna wipe out there for a second but I'm glad you didn't." leah squeezes your body in a hug rocking you from side to side. "are you gonna go again? if you do i swear I'll put on some skis and go down the bunny slope."

you throw your head back with a laugh, imagining leah slowly going down the snow while pizza and french frying her skis. you bask in the compliments given to you by nora who was watching the whole time and manny who tells you he successfully completed the green slope with no falls or bumps. you feel the urge to talk to abby, to have her tell you she's proud of you when you see her near one of the equipment cabins, talking to owen.

"are you gonna go again or do you wanna stop for the day?"

you look at nora with a grin. "yeah, i'll go again."

later that night, after a few more hours of racing your friends and even seeing a few more fans who recognized you, even one lady who said she remembered you based on your form, everyone is headed back to the house to end the day after getting some drink from the community lodge

for some reason, abby hasn't talked to you since, and based on what you saw you're preparing for the damn worst. a small part of you knows you might be overreacting, that there's no way she would fall for the bullshit more had to say to her, but her avoidance of you isn't helping that little part take charge.

like she could read your mind, she's on your tail and following you into your bedroom, taking off her clothes as you do the same but still no word before you head into the shower. under the heat of the water, you rest your head on the wall and close your eyes to try to center yourself. you know abby, you know how much she's done for you. owen wasn't going to get in the way of that and you refused to let him.

you dry yourself off, brush your teeth, moisturize your body, and decide not to put on your pajamas and just this cute robe abby bought for you before leaving the bathroom. after turning off the lights you stop in your tracks, abby sitting on the side of the bed and staring at you.

your feet slowly carry you closer to her before she rolls her eyes and tugs you onto her lap. your face is neutral, even when you can feel the bulge inside of her sweatpants. you tilt your head and she replicates it.

"let me guess, you got an attitude again?"

"you're a fucking hypocrite."

"wh?" her face jerks back in confusion. "what are you talking about?"

"don't play fucking dumb with me abigail. biggest personal growth moment for me in forever and you spend it talking to your damn ex, who if you didn't catch it is still hung up on you, by the way."

"i know, just let me explain-"

"no, i don't want to know. if you're just doing all this as some fucked up way to let me down gently i swear to god-"

you get cut off when one of her hands moves from your waist to cover your mouth, her eyes drooping when you nip at her palm.

"stop it. you know i wouldn't do something that shitty to you, please stop being so paranoid." she waits to gauge your reaction before she decides that you aren't likely to cut her off, softly rubbing at the skin under your eye. "please don't cry."

"im not gonna cry."

"just wanted to make sure. because i care about you, and that's what i was letting owen know that when he was being a jealous dick about you skiing earlier. told him I'm this close to kicking him to the curb for good."

"wait really? what'd he say? i bet he was pissed when i skied over that stuck stump, probably wishes i rode over it and fucking broke my back."

"jeez, you really do despise him." she shakes her head, smiling and rubbing her hands on your thighs. "but yes, he was wondering if maybe now that you were fine to ski you were trying to upstage me or something."

"and do you? and why were you ignoring me?"

she sighed. "literally the opposite. you're just...so amazing, and funny, and talented, and i just know soon you'll be this olympian and wont wanna deal with me and my dumb ex anymore."

"i mean, i am amazing you're right about that," you brag, giggling when she pinches you. "but i'd deal with anything to be with you. i don't even have the words. i wouldn't have gotten on that slope without you always pushing me, despite how annoying i may find it."

abby's' face is beaming and suddenly she's kissing you like you're air, leaning back into the bed so you can hover over her. she stops kissing you just to move her ministrations to all over your face, repeating little 'i love you's' as she does so, reveling in the little hums that leave your throat.

"ok, are we done being sappy so we can fuck now?" your question ends in a squeak when her palm slaps your ass. you look at her with a glare and she just dopily smiles at you, gripping your hips to flip you underneath her.

"y'know, owen and mel picked the room right next to ours." she grinds her hips into yours, the friction of the strap rubbing against you heightened since your robe was riding up to show her bare cunt.

"god, you want me to be loud, don't you?"

"mmhm." she grins as her hand moves down to push the band of her pants down, the feeling of the toy grinding out forcing you to bite your lip to hide your moan, embarrassed by how quickly she could make you want it. her thumbs moves to pull your lip from between your teeth.

she continues humping you until she can see you're wet enough to slide in, looking for your nod to push the strap into you, groaning as it just slides in.

"y/n, we barely did any foreplay-"

"shut up, please shut up."

for some reason she takes that as a sign to start thrusting, reveling in your moans as they finally start to pick up volume. you try to bite the back of your hand when she pulls it away, holding it in hers and holding it above your head. the action is so sweet it almost makes you cry, instead thrusting your head up to press a sweet kiss to her lips.

"mm, love when you're all sweet like this honey. wanna stay like this forever, love you so fuckin much i swear to god." she accentuates her last couple of words with short but harsh thrusts that knock the breath out of your lungs. your orgasm is fast approaching at this rate, and she can tell by the way your eyes are fluttering and your hand is squeezing hers.

"you gonna cum? huh? gonna cum all over me baby?" you nod your head, not trusting the words and sounds that are coming out of your throat. she moves her hand down to rub at your clit and suddenly your stomach is pulsing and your orgasm is hitting you like a truck, abby's following after yours as she's groaning into your neck and thrusting harder to grind the base of the strap into her clit.

it takes a minute for both of you to calm down, the bliss overtaking the both of you.

"was...was that loud enough?" you whisper and feel her silent laugh on top of you, rubbing your leg over the back of hers.

she pushes her head up enough to look you in the eyes, and you really regret asking the question because she's got that dumb-ass smile back on her face and shaking her head.

only a few minutes later she's got you on all fours, leg propped up as she forces your hips back and forth on her dick. and then after that she makes you ride her, and then the position she knows you're obsessed with: her fucking you while standing up.

"a-abs! abby! oh my god!" your throat is sore as her fingers grip the meat of your thighs, the force of her bouncing you and thrusting her hips up getting you closer and closer to euphoria. your eyes are closed and your head is tilted back, doing anything to avoid the way she's looking at you like you're some goddess she's been blessed to witness.

"just a little bit more baby. cmon, tell me how much you love it."

"i do! fuck abby, love it so much."

"love what, honey? you can do it, know you can. god you're so perfect."

your mind is hazy with the feeling of the strap hitting that sensitive spot inside of you with every bounce of your hips and her words that you barely even register her demand, groaning when she bites at one of your tits that have been bouncing in her face.

"tell me what you love. please, please tell me."

"nghh, love you abby! fuckin love your dick so much!"

"that's it, thaaat's it pretty girl. let everyone you're mine, that i'm yours-"

you're pretty sure she kept talking after that, but the rush of your orgasm deafens every sound and lights your body on fire, only able to feel the high and the cum leaking down your thighs. you go in and out of consciousness but come back to when you're both back in bed, abby pulling you onto her chest and she rubs a soft hand down your back.

"love you." you mumble, snuggling into the warmness of her.

"i love you too, y/n."

"'m sorry about earlier."

"me too. promise that i'll tell you whenever i'm feeling down. or when i'm dealing with a douche."

"me too."

you get the best night's sleep you've had in years.

in the morning everyone seems ecstatic for the holiday, ready to share their gifts with each other after breakfast. you decide to join in helping to cook, which gets you a crazy accusation from jordan saying your helping is just 'sitting on the counter so abby has something to look at while you drink a mimosa". whatever. abby is standing between your thighs and talking to you about her new workout schedule when owen and manny walk into the room, manny bidding you a sly 'good morning' with a smirk as owen grabs water from the fridge.

"hey owes, can you hand me one?" abby asks, her fingers drumming on your thigh as she uses the other to catch the bottle he tosses to her with a polite smile. your eyes are following the action suspiciously before abby is for some reason keeping a grip on the middle of the bottle as she opens it so the liquid spurts onto a bit of her shirt.

"ugh, abs! wait a second." you start to move off the counter when she holds your hips down.

"its fine, babe. i'm used to things squirting on me, anyway."

your face scrunches up as you smack her in the shoulder, your face hot as you hear jordan and manny cackling like hyenas and owen chugs down his water. abby just presses a loud kiss on your cheek.

other than your friends constantly teasing you, nora whispering a 'love shack' in your ear when she walks behind you in the living room, the day really is perfect. when the sun sets everyone is exchanging the gifts they got for each other. leah got jordan some necklace he's had his eyes on, manny bought mel some earmuffs after hers broke a month ago. some of them teased you for having surprisingly thoughtful gifts despite having a heart of only half-thawed ice, making you only reply that you weren't past taking the gifts back.

and then you open the gift abby got you and nearly cry; a custom snow globe, inside two mini figures dancing on a mountain of snow, one wearing skis and the other wearing skates. the she almost does the same with the corny 'cooking for two' book you bought her and the limited edition version of her favorite novel.

its a night full of warmth and laughter, and once it ends you find yourself standing out on the balcony, looking out at the lit lights of the village and the lifts on the slopes. your phone is in your hand and you open the text messages to your dad.

tell everyone i said merry christmas. its going to take me time to mentally heal enough to train. but if you're willing to do it with me then i'm in.

"hey, it's fucking freezing out here." abby opens the slide-apart door and comes up beside you, wrapping her arms around you to look out at the view with you. "are you ok?"

you sigh, turning to admire her. the redness of her cheeks, the tiny snowflakes in her hair. the way she's looking at you.

you nod your head.

"i'm on top of the world."

fics keep getting longer to overcompensate allah take me now. spent so much of yesterday aka my birthday writing this omg but it was so fun to write a more developed reader. uhhh idk stream cobra by megan.

[alexa-fika]

ALRIGHT! ALRIGHT! Last request before I sleep

Here me out shanks with a 13 year old daughter (who has his iconic red hair) reader who absolutely despised him because he's the reason why her town got attack (Shanks keeps flirting with her mother unknowingly he accidentally made her into an outcast)

Reader who's snarky, a bit rude but polite and well mannered (unlike shanks)

Reader who's always reading and very elegant royalty like but not spoiled and very serious all the time (unlike shanks)

Reader who's secretly insecure and scared that she's always gonna be in her father shadow

Reader who is always in the whitebeard pirates (THOUGHT THIS WASN'T A WHITEBEARD REQUEST BUT I MADE IT ANYWAYS?)

Reader who always dye their hair into black

Reader who bonds with ace because of their daddy issues 🥰

That's it. That's the tweet

Roots ( Ace x f!teen!reader)

A/N here we go, I dont feel with this one, I feel like I missed the whole vibe you were trying to get when you submitted the regret, I spend a week just staring at the screen trying to think of how to approach it and I can’t say I choose the right one

Dokucha frowns as the book on her hands is ripped away from her hands, only to let a small smile as she recognizes the candy cane-patterned bracelet

"Ace, you're back," she stated, looking up at the grinning man squatting on the railing

"I'm back," he responds, jumping down from the railing and bringing the girl into a side hug

"What have you been up to today?"

"I am actually taking a small breather before I continue training; I believe it's Haruta's turn for a session," she stated gingerly, clenching her hands in a lower position

"Turn?"He furrowed his brows at her words and the implications behind them

"Dokucha, how many sessions have you done?"

She bites at her lip, shifting her gaze away from his

"This would be the seventh," she muttered

"I told you to stop pushing it, you're only thirteen dokucha, it's okay to train, but this is too much," he scolded

"Is this about Shanks?" he muttered, kneeling down to her level

"I don't want to fall behind."

" I know you don't, but are you just going to waste your life trying to catch him?

Isn't that what you don't want to do? To live your whole life trying to surpass your old man?"

"I can see it in their eyes, Ace, every time we go on a mission; all they can see is him, they don't think of me as Dokucha, they just see his daughter," she murmured, teary eyes flickering back to the man

"Then let them. They have no place in your life, so why would you care what a bunch of strangers think?" he asked

He frowns at the small unconvinced hum that leaves the teen at his words only to bounce back as an idea comes to mind

“ Hey, I found a cool place on my way back; it’s only a few minutes on the Striker; wanna check it out?”

“But Haruta is expecting me…”

“Don’t worry about that; you said you still have some time, right?”

“I suppose so, b-

“Great, you head to the Striker; I will catch back up in a second; need to get something before we head out,” he said, running off

“W- Ace! I din- and he’s gone” she mutters at the retreating form of the commander, taking a glance down at the striker that had been tied to the Moby Dick

“I guess no harm in a small ride.”

-

“How did you find this place?” she muttered

The two found themselves sitting on the Striker, their leaves soaking in crystal clear water as they watched all the fish swim around them, curious about the two visitors

“I visited this island before on one of my missions.”

“Hm”

"Listen, Dokucha, I have told you about my father, yeah?”

“Yes, you did.”

“The reason why I'm so pushy on stopping what you’re doing is because I made the same mistake, and it cost me over 15 years of my life” he started, noticing how his words had finally gotten the girl’s attention

“ I spent all that time trying to follow my father’s legacy, to surpass him. To become the pirate king, to Defeat whitebeard. All the while, it just ate me inside; I was blindsided and led by my anger toward him for all those years. I missed many opportunities to enjoy, to have a carefree childhood just to accomplish that goal”

“How did you…why…”

“Why I stopped?”

“Yes”

“I found pops.”

“ I thought your goal was to take him down to prove yourself?” She asked now facing his way as her legs Straddled the Striker giving him her full attention, loookimg up at him in confusion

“It was; I spent the next few days going after him even after he took me into the moby; every day, I would try.”

“I refuse to believe that” she scoffed with an amused laugh

“I'm serious!

Tried over a hundred times, and every time, I would end up with either a bloody nose or thrown into the sea.”

She covers her mouth as she lets out a muffled laugh at the thought of a grumpy, drenched Ace

“A-Anyway, after that, Marco and later Pops talked with me; it made me realize how useless it was to try to take Pops down and follow after someone else’s dream.”

“Din’t you feel disappointed?”

“Quite the opposite, I felt free for the first time, felt free to make choices based on what I wanted and not to surpass my father; it’s led me to where I am now, and it was the best realization I made in my life.”

“…”

“Keep it in mind, okay? Let’s head back for now,” he said, pushing himself up, extending a hand to the girl as he prepped the Striker

“How do you think I should start?”

“Start what?” He questions, manauvering the Striker through the waves, slowing down as he puts his attention on her

“Letting go”

“Maybe you should start with this,” he said, flicking their head

“Jerk, what was the reason for that?”

“Stop trying to change yourself; your roots are coming out; why don’t you let them grow?”

“Ah!” She exclaims covering her head at his comment, missing the way he sighed and shook his head only to come back to her senses as a weight was placed on her head

“You should be proud of yourself, the way you look, the way you are; at the end of the day, it’s yours, not his; now might be the best time

She looks up at the ravenette questioningly, his iconic hat now missing from his head and gingerly placed on hers

“What do you mean?”

He simply gestures to the new vessel now anchored next to the Moby Dick

“What is he doing here.”

Thoughts?

Taglist:

@Imaginarydreams

@amethystviolin

@h0n3y-l3m0n05

[indigoflorals]

hello! i love your work and i dont know if your comfortable writing this but basically reader likes jj a lot and one day she accidentally sees jj and a touron having sex, so she avoids jj for some time and then jj and reader have an argument about that then she admits she likes him? if you are not comfortable you dont have to! thank you <3

envy (18+)

JJ Maybank x Reader

Summary: You see JJ hooking up with another girl. He proves to you that you’re the only girl he’s interested in.

Warnings: oral sex(fem), angsty feelings, Slight voyeurism, overstimulation

꧁༺ ༻꧂

How could he?

It was supposed to be you that night in his room. It was your movie night. You spent every Friday night together and this week wasn’t supposed to be any different.

Yet, when you arrived at JJ’s house, there was a car parked outside that you didn’t recognize. You approached with caution (like you normally did with JJ), opening and closing his front door with near silence.

That voice.

It was indistinguishably female, and you, unfortunately, recognized it. One of the tourons at the beach today had taken a particular liking in your blond friend, following him like a lost dog for much of the morning.

Then came the moans. And oh did you gag at JJ’s sorry attempts at sexy talk. It was like you really were hearing something you were never meant to in a million years.

You spun on your heals with a huff, having heard plenty. He was stringing you along and know you knew it. Your friends were right. JJ Maybank was a player who had no intentions of making you anything more than a hookup.

—

The next morning your phone exploded with texts from him. All more apologetic than the last. You chose not to respond.

Fuck I’m sorry I missed movie night, huh? -J 08:32

Is everything okay? I’m really sorry I know you were looking forward to it -J 09:27

I just had some shit going on last night and totally forgot. I’ll make it up to you - J 10:17

You knew he was aware of just how angry you were, he just didn’t know why. You almost never ignored his texts.

A knock on your bedroom door pulled you from your phone screen, and blue eyes met yours.

“Hey, your mom let me in, I was worried about you.” The blond unlaced his boots, placing them beside your dresser before sitting on the edge of your bed.

You turned away. “Go home, JJ. I’m not doing this anymore.”

He laughed nervously. “Jeez, I didn’t know you were that excited about movie night.”

“I saw you.” You blurted out, unable to hold it in any longer. “I showed up, and you were…with her.”

Silence filled the air now he tended.

“Look I—“

You turned to face him, waving your hand at his attempt to salvage the situation. “Save it, JJ. I thought maybe we had something. I thought maybe you liked me. Obviously I was being fucking naive.”

“We did! Well, we do, I hope.” He blurted out, “That’s what I’m trying to tell you. I couldn’t fuck her, and believe me, I tried—“

“Okay! Don’t wanna hear that.” You swatted at his face. “But why?”

“You.” He smiled, scooting to pull you into an embrace. You didn’t refuse. “She just wasn’t you. And I have never in my life not been able to have sex so I’m gonna need you to—“

“JJ.” You glared.

“Right,” He smiled, getting back to his original point, “What I’m saying is I didn’t think you felt the same so I tried to move on and I can’t.”

You sighed audibly, leaning into his embrace. “You are so stupid, JJ Maybank.”

Your best friend squeezed you tighter. “You’re not the first to say that and you won’t be the last.”

“Yeah yeah,” You leaned forward, pulling him into a gentle kiss. His lips were softer than you had imagined, and he tasted like weed.

He moaned almost inaudibly into your mouth, scooping you to his waist and standing you up with him. His hands were on your ass now, squeezing it while using it to support your weight in his arms.

Without breaking the kiss, he placed you gently on your back with your head in your pillows.

The blond pulled away, leaning down to kiss at the exposed skin of your inner thighs. “Let me make it up to you, okay?”

“Mmm fine.” You lifted a hand to run it through his hair. “She did sound like she was having a good time.”

JJ flashed a smile, eyes locking with yours as he pulled your shorts and panties down to expose your pussy in front of his face. “Oh you liked what you heard, then? Wished it was you?”

You groaned in embarrassment, covering your face with your hand. “JJ Maybank I swear to god I—“

Your complaints were cut short as he took your clit into his mouth, eliciting a loud moan from you. This made him eager to hear more and more.

He sucked at the sensitive bud, licking and kissing as you bucked your hips into his face. “J, fuck that’s so good.”

You could feel his hand snake up underneath you, his fingers prodding at your soaking hole. Without protest, he slipped two inside. Your back arched as he fingered you in a ‘come hither’ motion.

Fisting his hair, you came against his lips with a silent scream, and he moaned into your pussy. Fingers curled against you g-spot, he didn’t relent until you were squirming from overstimulation.

He released your clit with a quick kiss, and you squirmed at the feeling. He laughed at the sight.

“You’re so beautiful like this, you know. Should’ve just risked it a long time ago.”

You felt warmth creep up to your cheeks at the compliment. “Oh stop. You probably say that same line to every girl you do this with.”

“No, they’re not like you. Nothing like you.” He brushed a hair behind your ear. “Now let me clean you up.”

[kirxyz]

I fucked up…

riki x reader

warnings: death

i wrote this a long time ago and was ranting to my friend about this idea and im not editing it so!!

you and riki are enemies and one day he bullied you but the next day you didnt go school. he got worried because youre the person whos always healthy. so like he texted you and like he got a reply back but it wasnt you who messaged , it was your mom. “she has heart cancer. she might cure soon” which made rikis heart drop. he didnt know that you were suffering all this while. and even when you didnt say anything when he continues to bully you so he felt guilty asf. then a few days later, he gets a message back from your mom “sorry, she didnt make it”. riki felt like his whole world went colourless, he felt guilty. his last words to you were “go cry about it” that day when he bullied. he gets another message from your mom again “she also left a letter and something for you” riki gets the letter and it says “hey rikii! i know we werent good friends or even good to each other but i would like to thank you for always talking to me even though your words arent that nice, youre the only one who talks to me!!” riki felt his heart drop. how did someone he always bullies , thank him? the letter continues “also i kinda liked you before…lol i dont know why. but yeah , i left you my favourite snacks and a necklace. the necklace was supposed to be gift on the day i confess to you but i became sick that day but its alr.” riki couldn’t believe it. how can she like him so much till the point she got him gifts?? he became more guilty and he tears up abit. there was also a video linked with the letter. there was clips of you ranting about how much you liked riki even though you guys werent on good terms. there was a clip of you showing off your fit “i hope he likes it!” but the next clip was of you crying, “he said i looked ugly…” riki couldnt help but tear up more as that was the day he last saw her…. and he fucked it up by telling how her outfit looks bad. the next clip was you , in your bed, sick. it was the day that your heart cancer was announced to riki. you looked tired, sick and could barely even move. you then talked about how much you loved riki as you were writing his letter and prepare his gifts. riki was so so guilty and mad at himself for not noticing your hints the past few years. suddenly, you collapsed. that was the last ever time you spoke, moved or even breathed. the video ended. riki broke down in tears. how could he be a fool? how could someone like him so much till the fact that they spent their last seconds talking and doing things for him?? and the fact that he was treating her badly was making him break down more. he was so mad at himself till the fact that he threw his phone to the ground and collapsed to the grounf breaking down. riki felt like an idiot and he could never forgive himself “i fucked up..”

— i still love riki yall 🎀!!!

@helpwts

[bridgyrose]

Ruby sliced through the last of the grimm, almost out of breath from the mission she and Penny had been on. “I thought this was supposed to be an easy assignment.” 

“This is a lot easier than it could have been,” Penny answered as she made her to the ground. 

Ruby nearly blushed as she watched Penny descend. The way her weapons, Floating Array, were arranged behind her, how her skin glistened in the sunset and the way her eyes started to glow in the shade… it was almost like she had been watching an angel descend from the heavens. “Y-yeah, but there was still a lot of grimm to deal with. When we were told that we’d be helping out to clear a mine, I figured there’d be less here. Its not usual for grimm to hole up into a mine like that.” 

“At least it makes it easy to clear them out when they do. And it gives us more time to rest now that we have finished our assignment.” 

“Speaking of rest, I was hoping that maybe you and I could…” Ruby’s voice started to trail off as she thought about what she was trying to ask as she lost the words. It didnt matter how many times she had practiced with Yang or Weiss, no matter how many times she ran the words through her mind, the words just never seemed to come out right. “...could… maybe… do some weapon maintenance. Together. Alone.” 

Penny paused for a moment. “Alone? Will it not be easier to invite the rest of your team to join us? Yang and you both usually make it a big deal to have your team together before working-” 

“And they’ll be busy!” Ruby interrupted. “Besides, we dont get to do things together alone often. Sure, we take missions together, but when was the last time we really spent any time with just the two of us.” 

“Why does it matter if we’re alone?” 

“Because I-” Once again the words Ruby had wanted to say wouldnt come out no matter how much she wanted to try. I love you. Three simple words that couldnt be any harder to say. A soft sigh left her lips as she folded up her scythe. “I… I want to spend more time with you. We didnt have much of a chance to before the Vytal Festival ended and since I’ve started working in Atlas more, we’ve always been busy. If its not a mission to help clear out dust mines, then its whatever secret mission that Ironwood has for you.” 

“I want to get to know you better too, Ruby.” 

Ruby paused as she felt Penny take her hands and pull her close, the blush across her cheeks deepened as she stared into Penny’s green eyes. Her legs felt like jello as she tried to keep herself standing, almost propped up against Penny as she leaned forward. “Penny…” 

“You were one of my first friends that I met, and while I could not stay around Beacon for long, you still kept in touch.” Penny smiled a bit and let go of Ruby’s hands as she took a step back. Her smile faded for a moment as her scroll rang. “But the general… he needs me to be available whenever I can be. He thinks I can keep Remnant safe.” 

“Just… one night.” Ruby took a deep breath and stepped closer to Penny as she took a hand. “All I ask is for one night. One night for us to be alone, to become closer as friends. And maybe… maybe I can-” 

“Tell me that you love me?” Penny asked. 

Ruby sputtered and took a quick step back as she tried to regain her composure as her blushed turned redder than her cloak. “W-what? N-no. Its nothing like that. I-I just think you’re a really great friend.” 

“Then why do you want to be alone so badly?” 

“Because I want to go on a date with you!” Ruby blurted out. Her heart practically stopped as she realized what she had said, the blush on her face quickly faded as she covered her mouth. Of all the ways to ask, this had to be the worst.

“I would love to.” 

“You… you would?” 

Penny nodded and silenced her scroll. “The general can wait one night if its something this important.” 

Ruby felt her heart start to beat again as it slowed down, a blush crossed her cheeks as she reached for Penny’s hands, her fingers brushing against Penny’s. And once again, Penny almost looked like an angel in the setting sun, the shadows of the mine behind her looked almost like wings. “Then maybe we can go to the hotel I’m staying at and work on our weapons together. O-or we could go over mission plans.” 

“Or we could watch a movie.” 

“A movie. Right. A movie works.” 

Penny kissed Ruby’s cheek. “I’ll meet you there.” 

Ruby could feel her cheeks heat up as she pressed her fingers along where Penny had kissed her. Her heart raced as she watched Penny take off to the air and fly off as a green streak across the night sky. “I’ll be waiting.”

[stellawolfe30]

thinkin about how the journey to the west is just one big mess for wukong. but like, in a family sense.

idfk this might make no sense. also tw for mentions of abuse and manipulation.

i like to imagine before he meets tripitaka he's not a bad person at all, hes just wild, impulsive and theres things he doesnt understand. like as a very powerful monkey with no parents or role models there are things he doesnt understand regarding society, morals and right vs wrong.

hes impulsive and wild, a good person at heart but he doesnt know that some of the things he tends to do is moraly wrong. like okay he takes the immortal peaches yeah he knows its stealing but does he completly understand what stealing does? does he understand how it impacts other people? no. he just thinks "oooooh pretty yummy peaches i want some. people are gaurding it? oh no problem im sneaky"

like a child.

he doesnt understand how things affect other people until someone explains it or it happens to him.

"why are you pouting mihou"

"you ate my pile of peaches"

"oh...well, they were just laying there i dont really see the pr-"

*mihou sniffles*

"oh shit-"

then he rushes and grabs an even bigger pile of peaches from the mountain and drops it in front of mihou and then watches him eat while also thinking about how his dear friend reacted to him eating his peaches. hes king? cant he have anything he wants? so why did mihou care so much when he took his peaches? and why did he panic when he saw mihou cry.

he doesnt understand emotions or consequences until the result is staring at him in the face. especially when its someone he cares about or himself. then he starts to understand.

so he's childish, impulsive, wild, chaotic but also protective and thoughtful. he'll take a moment to think about things but the thought it almost never finished unless he really wants to understand something. and sometimes lui er mihou has to teach him and explain.

but in the end wukongs just a little monkey guy that wants to hang out on flower fruit mountain with his monkey people forever. he doesnt want to die because he doesnt want to lose what he has. he became strong because hes king. hes supposed to protect them so he will be strong enough to do so.

then imagine tripitaka comes in. tripitaka tries a simple worded approach to tell wukong dont do this dont do that, 'DONT KILL PEOPLE!!!! even though in wukongs mind "they were stealing our stuff and tried to hurt you tho-" the circelt activates.

wukong doesnt understand what did he do wrong? he was protecting his master like he was supposed to right? is this not? is this not how it works? how is this supposed to work?!?!

wukong does not understand most of the time why tripitaka activates the circlet. he did his job to the best of his understanding so why does he keep activating it?!

but i also think about how alot of media portrays the relationship to be father and son. mentor and student

"if a man teaches you for a day regard him as your father for the rest of your life"-chinese proverb.

so lets say tripitaca does explain things. but he doesnt explain it good enough. he doesnt understand how little wukong actually genuinly doesnt understand.

hes spent 100's of years on his mountain with other monkeys. he's never had to REALLY think about morals or emotions or complex things like right and wrong. hes just been a funky monkey eating fruit under the sun.

so when tripitaka tries to explain it doesnt get through to wukong because he doesnt understand how wukong works mentally.

"killing people is wrong"

"why, it gets them out of our way faster then just idk kicking them or breakign thier legs"

"because it is wrong wukong"

"but...why? why is it wrong?"

"because murder is evil"

"why, i dont get it, ive seen evil people murder as ive seen good people murder i dont get why it is wrong"

the circlet activates.

tripitaka (and thank you wolfcamellias for this beautiful idea GO READ THIER ANALYSIS NOW I HAVENT FINISHED READING IT BUT YOU SHOULD GO NOW THEYRE WRITING AND ART AND AASDFEGRHTFJYHGMSO GOOD) see's wukong as a parent would thier child in the sense that they want to mold and shape them into thier perfect image of child/student. and they will do that through any means. even if it hurts. its an abusive familial relationship. wukong is manipluated to think of tripitaka as a father and why wouldnt he know any better? hes never had a father but this monk is...teaching him? thats what he says hes doing. shaping him into the perfect hero weapon hes meant to be. hes meant to be perfect, hes meant to be a hero people can look up to. a king that protects and he loves that idea. he smiles at the image of being a hero people can look up to and depend on for proection, people will love him.

but hes confused, why is tripitaka using the circlet? perhaps thats just how discipline works. yes yes thats what master says. he says its discipline its neccasary

tripitaka is doing what is necasarry to make wukong better. to make him perfect. was he not good enough before? master says he wasnt. so he couldnt have been. but hes good now? yes yes hes good enough hes good hes perfect.

and thats what wukong thinks. thats his mentallity through the journey as the circlect stays. it becomes a mentallity of, "i deserve this" or "its for the best", "he only does this because he cares enough to teach me"

dont even get me started on how this plays out when macaque tries to get him out. bro...

"i never understood..."

"i never understand what it meant to carelessly stain my hands with blood until i drowned in your's"

its a manipulative situation and i like to think back then wukong was easier to manipulate because there's things he just didnt understand or pick up on.

but then he went on the journey. he learned things dont get me wrong he learned important things whether he wanted to or not. he picked up on alot during the journey and even after. he started to see more and understand better the way the world and people work. how morals and consequences affect the world and the things we do and he kept learning throughout his time as hero until he decided to retire. then again he stll doesnt seem to be good enough. he keeps fucking up he keeps making mistakes.

maybe something he "learned" from his master wasnt right?

no no it was fine, that was fine. it was all for the best and betterment of himself.

he does end up finnaly realising that some things he ended up learning/picked up throughout the jourey wasnt right. kind of in the same sense as how abused children adapt to thier surroundings to survive. "dont bother when upset" "watch thier emotions" "keep it to yourself"

i think thats what causes wukongs HORRIBLE communication skills and desire to carry evem the heaviest weight alone on his shoulders.

its when he realises that some things he's been doing and "learned" isnt good. thats not what "normal" or "healthy" people do.

the circlet wasn't fucking necessary

and thats when he decides to retire.

what a long winded way to say wukong is neurodivergent and has been abused and manipulated.

[villainessxassassin]

How sweet

child!Riddle x child!reader

yes lets forget how dead this account was until now💀 Half way through writing I forgot I was writing for child!Riddle but everything works out in the end yeyyy -K.

✧|: Riddle being salty cuz he doesn't want a babysitter tutor at home so he's really mean to you at first but then you start doing all these really nice things that makes Riddle want to cry in a good way and now he doesn't know what to do.

༶•┈This will be part one (1/2?)

When Riddle thought all was lost, that he could never get to taste a sweet strawberry tart nor play outside with his friends ever again, his mother hires a... tutor? and you're the same age as him? like he's supposed to care, if anything he's even more displeased!

After the recent incident, young Riddle really couldn't think his life could get any more restricting than it already is. He can't play, he has to watch what he eats, he has to keep up with his academics, and now his mother's hiring a tutor to keep him company when she's not around?

"Do I really need this...?" It's been a few days since then, yet Riddle still couldn't bring himself to look her in the eyes, not after what he did. He didn't want to anger her any further. "You certainly have a long way to go until you can gain my trust back, and what better way to show me, than with this." She gestured to you at her side, posture straight with a slight smile on your face.

The young boy has heard of you prior before your arrival from his mother. You as well have been placed in the same position as Riddle, yet unlike him, you didn't seem to dislike the idea of having to work twice as hard for both him and yourself. If anything, you looked very much delighted to be here.

With a small bow you then began to introduce yourself, but all Riddle was able to focus on with your voice fading out was the slight ringing in his ears that grew louder by time.

"Now, do try to get along."

.

A week has gone by. A week of you constantly pestering Riddle to work twice as hard. A week of extra papers piled up on his desk. A week of the very thread of his patience finally on the brink of snapping, or in short,

it was a week of pure torture.

Again, Riddle really didn't understand why you were needed here. He was doing just fine by himself, save for what happened and for the very reason WHY you are present here in the first place but he's changed! He's already been enduring this far without complaining, so surely that was enough proof he no longer had any ulterior motives in changing his daily routine his mother has given, right?

"You should've completed these papers by now."

And again, your annoying voice cuts of his train of thought. "You shouldn't be slacking, I've been given strict instructions to make sure you finish these on time", you say while taking the paper Riddle just finished and replacing it with another.

"I'm not some immature child, you don't have to tell me every time, my oh so annoying Tutor, and for one, I dont need a babysitter either." Despite the initial fear of his mother finding out he's been speaking to you in this disrespectful manner, (unbeffiting of the rosehearts name) this is the relationship you've made from the one week spent here together, and besides, you're both the same age! 'Formalities shouldn't be taken that seriously', Is what you said, but Riddle already had no intentions of refering to you in any high regard (because of his newfound bitterness with a hint of saltyness for those around him).

"Hey! I already told you to think of me more as your study buddy! I have my own homework to do too you know."

"You say that and yet you continue to nag at me like an old lady, how irritating."

"It's not nagging, I'm simply looking out for you."

Yeah right. Despite the happy display you've shown at your first meeting, Riddle knows it was all a play, that you're only here because you were forced into this position. With a sigh, Riddle finally finished the last of his homework, stretching his small arms up into the air to signal his victory over the sheets of problem filled papers.

"There, I'm finished. Now will you give me this time for myself or will you continue on with this pointless conversation?" With that the playful look on your face disappeared, and in it's place you let out a small laugh, but it lacked any sense of glee, accompanying it was a sad smile.

"I thought the conversation to have been... nice. You don't often come to openly chat with me, even if it's for things relating to outside of your academics. That's why your mother- I mean, that's why I—"

The chair scraped the floor as Riddle shot up from his seat, giving you a look that clearly showed his distaste for the topic you took on. You never broke eye contact as tension soon began to build up. It was moments after, Riddle finally chose his next choice of words, and did they stung, cutting deeper than any paper cut you've ever received. "Let me make one thing clear," your breathing was becoming heavy, but you hung onto his every word, "If you think being my tutor would give you some sort of privilege to speak to me like we're close, as if we're actually friends, then please leave."

You could only watch as he promptly made his way towards the kitchen, probably wanting to be anywhere away from you, is what you think. Sighing, this may come to be more difficult of a task than you expected, but you weren't just going to leave like what Riddle wanted. You've already made it this far into a week with him, so you're not going to give in and give up. Afterall, Riddle is your friend, you just need a bit more time in order to help him see it. To accept you were there for him.

You caught onto his final words, and that only was the beginning.

"I've had enough of people expecting me to be better,"

'You're a Rosehearts for our Great Seven's sake! this shouldn't be difficult for you to do right?!'

"To have others cut into my life without warning when I tell them not to, only to leave once I've been caught,"

'You can study later, come on let's play, and eat all the sweets we want in the meantime!'

"I need at least one person to do their job correctly, so make things easier for me, will you?"

[cindersnows]

@singer-smiles-101

HI OK SO

second and chosen already have (intentional) parallels ---- down to the powers and even the name, second is supposed to be like a mirror of chosen and (what i imagine chosen would have been like if alan had been more merciful). however, i feel like there are some lesser acknowledged parallels between dark and purple, and also dark/chosen and second/purple's relationships.

first, the parallels between dark and purple: we start with the obvious. they were both introduced as tentative allies before becoming antagonists quickly, and then coming back much later for revenge. (purple also got redeemed, but dark hasn't been confirmed alive and redeemed again so...)

it goes a bit deeper than that, though. they both come off as selfish at first, though if you look at their pasts and implied motives, that's not the case. they were both betrayed by a parental(?) figure early in their lives, and spent a lot of the rest of their lives focused on that figure --- although dark was focused on getting revenge, while purple wanted to live up to his ideals. (note: i dont see alan as dark's parent but he definitely had some kind of parent-like significance to dark). both purple and dark are weaker than their peers, but make up for it using their smarts. also they can both code <3

theyre both dramatic and smug. they don't have short tempers, but when they do get mad they get Extreme (re: throwing blue and green in jail). i do believe that purple and dark would get along quite well (bugduo propaganda) but that's not the point of this ramble.

now, dark and purple's relationships with chosen and second are Very interesting. dark and purple both start off fighting second, but after losing, they switch sides. here's the thing: when dark joins chosen, that's when she switches to the "evil" side. purple joining second is when she joins the good side. this becomes significant later.

both of their relationships mainly take place off-screen, but we can make some assumptions. purple and second are close, at least moreso than purple is to the rest of the cg (- green), since he only goes to hug them in avm21. dark and chosen are obviously close, considering they only had each other for years, and in ava5 we can see that dark was friendly with chosen, at least til they started fighting.

second and chosen are both the catalysts for purple and dark's lives changing. second helped purple learn to accept loss and make new friends, and chosen helped dark escape from the computer and uhhh... commit genocide...

this is where things get really different. chosen was dark's only friend for a long time, and even if they later realised that killing Bad, they had influenced dark to think that she could do whatever she wanted. (not blaming chosen, but from what i can tell dark wasn't really that murderous prior to joining chosen). dark was without any good influences or support system for her whole life, so when chosen tried to convince dark to stop, instead of tentatively listening like purple did, he just got angry and fought back. this is also because theyre both fucking awful at communicating.

purple also didn't have much of a support system prior to meeting second, but at least grew up with some semblance of a family. when second stopped purple and offered a truce, she decided to accept it. ofc he went back on it later, god knows why, but yeah. i feel like dark's fate is partially bc of the lack of support system, and like second and chosen, i feel like purple is (kind of) what dark would have been like if he'd been created under better circumstances.

i think both second and purple would be able to guide their respective foils into bettering not only themselves but their relationship with each other, especially purple and dark (more bugduo propaganda). but yeah those r my thoughts on why these second/chosen and purple/dark are the same flavor of guys.

[nerves-nebula]

Sorry bout this thing but I kinda wanted to tell my thoughts about your stuff. Im kind of hoping this will get drowned in your inbox honestly, since this is just a really long unsolicited rant of mine.

Sometimes when i scroll through your account and I encounter csa, incest and mentions of suicide in your posts I get uncomfortable but then I remember that one phrase that goes something like "Art should comfort the disturbed and disturb the comforted" and I just feel kinda bad bout myself.

When I was a kid my nannys bf forced me to kiss him in the lips whenever we met. I was 6. It was uncomfortable. I never did tell my nanny about it. My parents are both police people and my mother had long explained the concept of rape and how unconsensual touch is bad and you shouldnt allow that but something prevented me from telling anyone what was happening. I dont know why. I know they would immiedietly jail that guy if they did but somehow it felt like no one would believe me. I never told them until now, then when I was what, 6-8 years old? I cant even remember. Yeah somewhere around that, he molested me when my nanny was few feet away and asleep and for the next 4 years of my life i felt dirty. Desecrated. Stupid. I couldnt even look down at my naked body when i shower back then, but somehow I managed to trudge on living by trying to forget the fact it happened. Its been 8 years since Ive last seen him. Ive told anyone who I knew who doesnt care enough to be friends with me but cared enough to listen about it but my Parents are none the wiser and i plan on keeping it that way.

Also. Im a year away from being legal now. Ive thought about killing myself or just generally not wanting to exist anymore many times since then, cuz lifes equipped with motolov cocktails of "get fucked dumbass" and i somehow managed to get a coupon for at least a million of them.

(I hope that line made you laugh if you read this).

Coming back to the phrase i mentioned earlier, it feels weird whenever i feel something similar to the feeling of being triggered while looking at csa being depicted. By definition, i would be considered a victim, and id of course would be comforted by seeing similar experiences happen to people because relating to something usually induces a positive feeling. I dont. I see your art and it guts me. It guts me and the fact that it does also guts me, because what does that mean? I am supposed to be the comforted? Despite the fact that I was taken advantage of as a child and spent night after might thinking how stupid i was and why I let that happen to me even when I was equiped with the information that makes me less vulnerable than other children? So i do I correspond more with those who are defined as comforted then, was i not disturbed after all? Was i victimizing myself all along? Am I a bad person for thinking i was? No wait, that doesnt make any sense at all. Its all wrong. Why am I so guilty about this? Why am i subjecting myself to this?

And then it repeats.

I still go through your blog because well, i love tmnt, i love your artstyle, i love the way you tell stories, I love how you dont sugar coat csa, incest and other darker topics like body horror, erotism and sadism, i hate how much it haunts me, i love the fact i can relate, i hate how much you hurt them, i love the fact that you dont hold back, i love how you show the ugly sides of healing, i love how you depict how much people can change and struggle. Its comforting to me. Its discomforting to me. I stick hand into the fire knowing I would be burned, then I do.

And i like it. I like it somehow, like taking a nice smoke break when you have mild asthma, but like, better. Its a nice change of pace to feel so conflicted like this, its a nice change of pace to feel anything at all really.

But yeah. Tldr. Sorry for the trauma dump and your art makes me feel complicated. Its neat 👍

lot to reply to here! also, unfortunately for you, i check my inbox obsessively and dont get nearly as many asks as you seem to believe i do.

so firstly, no snappy saying is meant to encompass all of human experience, and you certainly shouldn't judge yourself for not fitting into it. easier said than done, i know, but still. i'm gonna try to address some things here, not gonna touch on all of it, but just know that i appreciate you sitting down to write me this.

(I hope that line made you laugh if you read this).

it made me smile, but i laughed at this, because it's a very sweet look into you writing this. puts into perspective how, even though this is public, it was written TO me. like a letter in victorian times or something. that's sweet, i like that.

and id of course would be comforted by seeing similar experiences happen to people because relating to something usually induces a positive feeling. I dont.

you're making a lot of assumptions here that are kind of wild in that "this thought process was clearly designed by your mind to upset you specifically" sort of way. I mean, would you say this to literally anyone else when they feel uncomfortable or triggered about viewing media that relates to their trauma? There's really no telling what a survivor will feel comforted by and you aren't Doing It Wrong by having a different reaction.

there's a reason i tag it as "csa tw" and that's so people can AVOID it as well as search it up.

how stupid i was and why I let that happen to me even when I was equipped with the information that makes me less vulnerable than other children?

i know you recognize at the end of the thought process that this is not true, but i feel the need to reiterate: there is no such thing as being less vulnerable than other children through your own actions. you can try to equip kids with knowledge that might protect them, but that doesn't make them any less vulnerable.

my dad told me about rape and molestation all the time, but he never accounted for the kinds of scenarios i was actually the most likely to fall victim to, partly because i don't think he actually knew much about childhood sexual abuse, and partly because he was more obsessed with the idea of me being kidnapped and raped/murdered than he was about forms of sexual abuse he'd consider more "mild"

No wait, that doesnt make any sense at all. Its all wrong. Why am I so guilty about this? Why am i subjecting myself to this?

i can't answer that one, unfortunately. personally, i like to feel gutted, it's cathartic to me. might be something like that to you, based on how you go on to describe it, but you might also be doing some kinda self harm.

I stick hand into the fire knowing I would be burned, then I do.

saaaaame. i triggered myself into a breakdown in class once cuz i'd been reading fucked fanfiction before class and i got SAD lol.

Its a nice change of pace to feel so conflicted like this, its a nice change of pace to feel anything at all really.

we are shaking hands over this.

anywho, no need to apologize! i am glad, if nothing else, to provide you with a strange and upsetting experience that is not entirely bad.

I really do adore hearing how my stuff makes people feel. it's like, a solid one third of the reason i do this. i still make stuff that doesn't exist to be shown off but WOW showing shit off and getting a response feels FANTASTIC. like, i'm in your head now!! you have been CHANGED by my ART. it's maybe the best part of being alive.

[ragnar0c]

Part 2 of comparing my EO ocs to my Mage Prophecies ocs

Tank and Tankei

The similarities in their names is purely a coincidence. Also Tankei is pronounced T-awn -KAY vs Tank just being said Tank. Plus... is Tank reaally his name? 🤨

Tankei was such a big supporting chara she could be elevated to main status. Subplots in most arcs focused on some aspect of her. And she was the fan fav.

She was an asshole, my favorite asshole whose reckless actions get the main girls in and out of trouble.

She needed to be watched bc when alone she was always misbehaving-- she hates authority, and she REALLY HATES injustice/unfairness.

Tankei melded so well with Mio bc she was the more real version of her. One that knew not everyone could be her friend bc she learned the hard way. And the reason why she is so harsh to Mio is because she never wants ANYONE to be like her. To be taken advantage of.

She has one of the absolute most DRAMATIC backstories ever. And it's one that shapes the plot.

If anyone has a more dramatic back story than Tankei it's probably Tank BAHAHAHA.

He is also a drunk asshole who has the be watched bc he misbehaves (thank you for watching Enid.....). But unlike Tankei. He's super... meticulous about what he does 🤨

His back story also leads a few subplots I have in mind. Actually maybe like 3. He was supposed to just be a side chara but the more I characterized him? He's actually so much more intelligent than Tankei when it comes to people. (I think). And his arc is sweet too. Yeah that guy is an asshole but I personally think he says so to trick people.

If they met: also at a bar. (They both use alcohol to turn off their brains).

They would beat the shit out of someone who was rude at the bar and vaguely remember each other afterwards.

He'd call her "chick" tho. Different than how he calls Alope and Hana kids... he'd definitely view her as more adult than those too bc he knows that she has seen very much.

Tank when Tankei calls him old man (he is tasting his own medicine)

Enid and Kai + Kiemi

Okay so Enid... Enid is one of my only EO ocs that embodies a few ocs rather than just 1. I have like 4 ocs that remind me of him. But narrowed it down to 2... the other 2 are more closely related to other EO ocs anyway.

Anyway Kai is another OC's son. Lady Micah's son!

I don't have comics of them interacting but it's. Oddly in character. Lady is the leader of a like police force, the specialized knights of the nation, the Royal Guardians. Kai is the highest ranking RG member. He is so ridiculously talented, powerful and awesome. But none of this stuff means anything to him bc his self esteem is soooooOoooo LOW.

Yeah. He can control gravity in a certain location. Yes he's a skilled swordsman. But what if hes faking that? ☹ he feels like an impostor...

He has all these achievements, but since he's so... insecure people dont know and view him as some average guy. Most don't even know he's rank 1. Which reinforces his inferiority complex.

Enid... Well when I rewrote chapter 1 I wanted to make it more obvious they were similar.

Like. You see Enid but not really?? Like. WHOA. That's a person. But... then you look at something else. They are the most vibrant in the room but surpress most of their personality. So people just view her as some guy.

Can't get into all Enid's problems bc Enid is a rare character who's backstory isn't super important. Maybe like 2 notes of it are. But other than that, all Enid is in the main story.

If they met: I think Enid would see Kai having a bad time and give him a pep-talk. Only to find out bro is basically capable of killing demigods and get SUPER PISSED OFF.

It's okay Enid. Post game, you can kill demigods too.

The other MP character is Kiemi.

Also one of the Royal Guardians. One who dedicated her whole life to the king. She represses her emotions like Enid too. Acting regal when shes really really upset that she's spent her life this way. Kiemi masks it and usually just tries to make sure no one feels like her. Giving confidence to everyone else and supporting them. (Including Kai)

She reminds me of young Enid. Before Enid became a monk they were unhappy in the same way Kiemi was.

If they met: ENID WOULD NOTICE HOW MESSED UP KIEMI'S QI IS. Kiemi's energy is so out of whack. They are repressing so much more than Enid.

They would talk and be good friends. Also if Enid ever lost confidence Kiemi would gas him up SO HARD.

Also! Kiemi and Kai are the main two who baby sit Tankei. So Enidcore. You know with Joe they babysit Tank. (Though... who is rlly being babysat between those two????)

That's it for this one!

I'll do more charas once I actually introduce them. :3!

[firstdegreefangirl]

Tim and Lucy + you dont need to pretend with me

“Lucy,” Tim calls after her as everyone parades out of the roll call room. She works her way backward through the crowd and joins Tim at the podium. 

“What’s up?” 

“I just wanted to check in, see how you’re doing. With … everything.”  

Lucy shits her weight between her feet, fingers wrapping anxiously around her gun belt as she dodges the question. “It’s been almost three weeks.” 

“I know. And I also know people stop checking in, sometimes before they should. So, how are you doing?” 

She takes a long moment to consider what Tim is asking. 

How is she doing? 

She’s alright, she thinks. Her shoulder aches a little bit, stiff from sleeping differently now that Chris is sharing her bed more nights than not. And she’s tired, waking up every few hours between his nightmares and her own. She doubled down on coffee this morning, to make up for not waking up in time for breakfast, so she’s all jittery. 

And to top it all off, Rosalind is still out there. 

Still, it could have been so much worse.  

“I’m great!” She finally says, plastering on a grin. “Everything’s great. It’s great, Chris is great and we’re great, and it's just …" Lucy feels herself rambling and trails off. 

“Great?” Tim supplies, with a smile that quickly fades. “You’ve been through a lot, you know? It’s OK if things are … not great right now.” 

His voice is gentle, but he’s not coddling her. That, mixed with his words and the look of understanding on his face, unlocks something buried deep in Lucy’s chest.  

She sucks in a deep breath.  

“Can we … maybe go talk somewhere quieter?” 

Tim leads her to a rarely used meeting room, past booking and interrogation. He closes the door behind them and turns to face her.  

“Want to try that again?” Lucy nods. “How are you doing?” 

“I’m …" She chickens out. “Fine.”  

“Lucy. C’mon. You don’t need to pretend with me.” 

“I’m … tired. Like all the time, and I just keep having to deal with more.” She drops to sit sideways in one of the chairs, wrapping her arm along the back. “It’s one thing after another: going undercover, Rosalind, Chris, work … Chris …" She’s not sure why she says his name again.  

“Chris?” Tim echoes. 

“How are you supposed to break up with someone who almost died because of you?” 

“Because of Rosalind,” Tim interjects. “You didn’t do anything to him. She did.” 

“Because he’s connected to me.” Tim opens his mouth to argue again, but Lucy keeps going. “And either way, how am I supposed to leave him alone to recover? He can barely open a car of peanut butter.” 

“And just because of that you want to …" 

“No! I don’t know! Maybe? Not because he’s hurt, I would never. But since we … before Vegas, I’ve been thinking about it? But then we got back and … you know. So know I’m taking care of him, and he thinks we’re something and I … I don’t know. What do you think?” 

“I think … if you’re thinking about this, I mean, what’s your plan? Keep stringing him along, letting him think things are fine? That’s not fair to either of you.” 

“Yeah …" Lucy sighs. She knows Tim is right, but still. It feels cruel, somehow, to cut him loose so soon after he almost bled out on her sofa. “Don’t people say not to make major life changes right after traumatic events?” 

“They do.” Tim nods, sitting down across from her. “But I don’t think that includes things you were thinking about before the trauma happened.” 

“Are you saying …" Lucy eyes him warily, trying to keep the butterflies out of her stomach and the knot out of her throat. If he is, if Tim is saying what Lucy has been feeling since that evening they spent together in her living room … 

She’s terrified to think about how quickly she’d act on it. 

“I’m saying that I can’t tell you what to do. But I’ve stayed in dead-end relationships before, and they’ve never worked themselves out. If you’ve been thinking about it this long and you’re not sure you’re in the right place, maybe that’s your answer.” 

Lucy looks at him head-on now, his bright eyes and soft smile. She thinks about how many times he’s dropped everything for her. She owes him everything, and even so, she knows that wouldn’t change her feelings about him. 

When she smiles, and he smiles back, she feels calmer than she has in over a month.  

“Yeah … maybe it is.” 

[acheronist]

hello!!!! thank you so much for your tarot analysis of our beloved captain dylan ♥️🤍 i am here to say that i will be a devoted audience to any and all drw tarot content (for the next forever) but also specifically to ask about hank being the empress and sergei as the chariot, if you have time 😭 you can’t just “btw” that in the tags and expect us to be NORMAL about it??

omg please.... i am not the oracle of detroit for no reason. i have been pulling season overview tarot spreads + cards for every wings game since 2019. if i'm qualified for ONE thing on this earth it's talking about card associations to players ✋🏻

empress - 40

i know you can find a lot of shit about how the empress is supposed to be about embracing this ~feminine energy~ but i think that's kind of bullshit. i see it more as like.. tending the hearth? and being gentle and loving but still a protector and a teacher? guarding what is beloved and dear to you and carrying yourself with a sense of grace and confidence. which is very much the way hank's captaincy panned out, dont u think?

in the halls of drw captaincy, his was interesting because he wasn't a leader for years and years and years like nick or steve, but he was really crucial to the team in a transitional sort of time. the championship team legends were retiring, new guys were coming in, there was sort of a new identity getting built in the lockerroom? on top of the um *cough* questionable choices kenny holland made as gm? hank's presence on the team as a touchstone through dramatic changes is what always struck me the most about his nhl career. he was a security that fans (new and old!) had absolute faith in. that steadiness is not something you see in every random nhler yknow.

which leads me into the fact that the empress also is a card of creativity. the empress sits with a crown of stars above her head, which ALSO suits hank a lot i think. he was a rookie when nick was captain. he was captain when dylan was a rookie. that's quite a long stretch of time if you stop to think about it. he spent his whole career being surrounded by stars and players with insane levels of creativity and ability to play the game. AND HE HAD THAT ABILITY HIMSELF TOO which is why he lead the forefront of it all. the red wings weren't the red wings without the eurotwins leading them to victories for a long time.

and i think there's a very loving quality to the empress as well, which of course extended to the younger guys in the room, but really shone most bright in the way that hank took dylan under his wing immediately & still is there, post retirement and off the ice, in the way that he still mentors dylan through hard times in the rebuild. i think the passing of that torch was obvious from dylan's first game, and hank did a really beautiful job teaching dylan how to act and grow up and be the kind of captain that's worthwhile, and truly means something in this city. and that devotion / mentor / compassion ties back into the meaning of the empress in a really special way I THINK!!!!!!!!!!!

chariot - 91

oh boy where do i start... even going all the way back to his initial defection from russia, there's always been such a furious independence streak in sergei that i just know it's impossible to tell him to do anything. there's a direction and confidence and borderline audacious(!?) attitude / motivation that's been in his freaky little Sagittarius heart since he was 18. and i think when u boil him down to his barest essential traits, that's one of the more foundational ones!?? and there really is not a card better suited to that attitude than the chariot

there's also something to be said about the chariot card imagery where the driver is being pulled along by the black and white sphinxes.

yeah uh huh. yup.

but also essentially the chariot is about overcoming obstacles, having the willpower and the determination to keep moving forward, the self discipline to get better, etc WHICH ALL I CAN PULL UP QUOTES FOR PRECISELY HOW THESE IDEAS CONNECT BACK TO SERGEI.

defecting from 1990s russia and his whole family and his entire life to go to a country where he didn't speak the language because he had enough confidence in himself to become a star.

growing up learning to skate on frozen rivers until he was a child and able to outskate and outplay adults.

the toughness it took in his heart to go back to the rink every day after his best friend was in critical condition and win something that'll always be bigger and more important than his whole life as an act of devotion.

the way he didn't let getting exiled ruin his career, but instead used it as a doorway to the next great joy of his career.

the way he's only just stopped skating and yet he still is winning back to back cups and achieving records and making history in his own way.

there's a stubborn need to always one-up his own achievements that haunts him soooo bad & you dont have that drive without completely embodying everything that the chariot stands for.

[meear]

The Dumbledores as Cain and Abel

I spent years being confused at how you were supposed to spell "Aberforth", because I kept seeing different spellings for it.

That was before realising Aberforth's name was actually only Abelforth in the French version.

Once I noticed that, I had to wonder why such a change? And then I thought hold up... the translator is onto something.

It's very common for names to be changed in translation, especially in Harry Potter: you could ask anyone who didn't read the books in English, and they'd give you a bunch of examples. But most of the time, proper nouns are translated because:

1) there's some sort of pun in the original name, like "Ravenclaw", "Longbottom" or "Slytherin": these names were constructed from english words, so it makes sense to change them in other languages

2) the original name fits the character's personality. The names "Snape", "Moody" and "Umbridge" all carry negative connotations, so they're all a perfect fit for their owner. But naturally a non-english speaker wouldn't register that, so the names need to change

In short, HP names tend to have meaning, so it's natural to translate that meaning for a foreign reader.

But as for Aberforth, why would you only change one letter? "aberforth" doesn't seem to mean anything anyway. Google says it's Gaelic for "from the river", but I don't know how reliable that is, and this doesn't seem so important.

The only explanation is that the French translator wanted to insist on the biblical reference.

Aberforth (or Abelforth in French) does share many similarities with Abel from the Bible:

1) their name, for one

2) sheep-herding: Abel was a shepherd ("Abel became a herder of sheep while Cain was a tiller of the soil"), and we know Aberforth was fond of goats and tended to them as well

3) much like how God favoured Abel's offering over Cain's, we know that Aberforth was Ariana's favourite, not Albus

4) both Aberforth and Abel were the (more admirable) younger brother.

Cain was the traitorous older brother who spilled the blood of his own sibling. Albus admits his own guilt in HP7 and claims Aberforth was a better person than him. This leads us to the most important point:

5) Albus blames himself for Ariana's death. the story of Cain and Abel is known as the first fratricide in abrahamic religions: it is very likely that either Albus or Aberforth (and I'm convinced it was Albus) was guilty of that sin, which led to their sister Ariana's death.

So yeah, I don't believe for a second any of Grindelwald's spells hurt Ariana. Of course, they're all guilty nonelethess, but I think it's important that Albus directly killed his sister too.

So I looked around to see if this possible connection was already well-known, but I could only find traces of it on a French thread from 2007. It was before the release of deathly Hallows, so the guy only suggested it based on Aberforth's fondness for goats (ahead of his time fr). He wasn't taken seriously because well, someone pointed out Abelforth wasn't Abelforth in the original language. Now we have the Dumbledore lore though!

Rowling's a Christian, and that religious influence can definitely be seen in Harry Potter (especially HP7, there are even some biblical verses in that one). It doesn't seem far-fetched to me.

If she intended it, it's still interesting that the translator took it upon himself to make that connection explicit (i dont see why else he'd change the name). Then again, while I like the translation (I never would've realised the Abel thing otherwise), what if it HAD been a coincidence? Did the translator only create meaning from his own interpretation? Much to think about