#yeah i was able to eat out with my friends last year despite living abroad from my family due to univ

[ladykyriaa]

You know the one down side as to having your birthday coincide with this year's cny?

You're celebrating both of it alone😭😭👌

[engie-ivy]

James refuses to accept the break-up unless either Remus or Sirius will look him in the eyes and tell him he's not in love with the other anymore

“Yes, Moony,” James says in a mocking tone, and Merlin, Sirius could actually strangle him right now. “Tell me you broke up with Padfoot because you weren’t in love with him anymore.”

Remus just gives James an angry look.

Sirius sighs. “Look, Moons. If you’re worried about hurting my feelings, it’s fine. I already know, have known for the last three years. Hearing you say it now isn’t going to kill me.”

From second thoughts to first dates

“Lily’s going to kill me.”

Sirius is sitting on the floor of his flat with his back leaning against the couch. Remus is sitting beside him, and a very drunk James is sitting across from them. Sirius and Remus are pleasantly buzzed, but James is positively wasted. They watched the final of the Quidditch World Cup together, and after James’s favourite team lost, went to the pub where he made use of the opportunity to drown his sorrows.

Now they’re back at Sirius’s flat, sitting on the floor eating grilled cheese. Living alone without house elves has proven to be very beneficial for Sirius’s grilled cheese-making skills.

“Nah,” Remus says, laying his head back against the couch and closing his eyes. “She’ll just let him suffer through his hangover tomorrow and then it’ll be fine.”

“He’s supposed to have lunch with Lily’s sister and her husband tomorrow,” Sirius sighs. “After the disaster of their first meeting, Lily was hoping he’d make a good impression this time.”

Remus opens one eye to look at James, who is currently dipping his grilled cheese in the glass of water Sirius gave him instead of his ketchup. “Yeah, that might be a problem.”

“Don’t care to make a good impression anyways,” James says, chewing on his soaked grilled cheese. “Pompous nitwits the both of them were.”

Remus smirks. “Is that why you went on a rant about the newest broom models and made the husband think you were mocking him?”

James points his grilled cheese at Remus, making wet crumbs fly in his face. “He started it! Puffed up buffoon bragging to me ‘bout his bloody... muggle wagon.”

“Still, you should act your best for Lily’s sake.”

James shakes his head. “No use. Doesn’t matter how I act, they’re determined to hate me, so they’ll hate me. Pointless, trying to impress them, absolutely pointless.”

Remus lays his head back down and Sirius focuses his attention on his own grilled cheese, while James keeps babbling on about how pointless it would be to try and be liked by Petunia and Vernon Dursley.

“Pointless, so very pointless. No point anywhere to found. One of the most pointless things in the world. Almost as pointless as...” James seems to wreck his brain to come up with something in the same category of pointlessness. “Your break-up!” He eventually says, waving his grilled cheese at Remus and Sirius.

Remus responds merely by giving James an exasperated look, and Sirius is proud of himself that, despite the sting in his heart, he manages not to react besides lifting one eyebrow. “Prongs, that still bothers you? It’s been three years.” Another sting in his heart. Has it really been three years already?

“Has it really been three years already?” James asks. “That makes it even more pointless! Three years and nothing’s changed.”

“Nothing’s changed?” Now Sirius can hardly keep the annoyance out of his voice. Three years since he last kissed Remus, three years since he last woke up next to Remus, three years since he last looked into Remus’s eyes and could think to himself ‘he’s mine’, three years since the world turned into a continuous numbness with just memories of happiness, but sure, nothing’s changed.

“Yes,” James says. “You’re still each other’s most important person in your life, you still look at each other like that, and neither one of you has ever dated anyone else in these three years, so what’d you go and break up for?”

Sirius frowns. “Moony dated. That woman from work...”

James makes a dismissive gesture. “She was married, her husband was just abroad.”

“Not like that,” Remus quickly clarifies. “We just hung out as friends a couple of times, nothing happened between us.”

“Moony asked me to keep up the pretence, hoping that it would help you move on.” James lets out a laugh. “What a disaster that was! During that time, a bloke was chatting you up in the pub once, and Moony glared at him so intense I thought he was going to punch him!” James burst into a fit of giggles. “Remember, Moony? You were clutching your glass so hard, it shattered in your hand!”

While James keeps giggling, Remus gives him a look that gives Sirius a pretty good idea what that bloke in the pub must have endured.

James wipes the tears from his eyes. “I’m just saying, you could’ve saved me three years of dealing with jealousy, pining and fits of crying.”

Sirius flushes and grits his teeth. Drunk or not, James has no business letting Remus know how pathetic he’s been these last three years. “Don’t make Moony feel guilty about it, Prongs. He’s not obligated to be with me just for your comfort, so deal with it.”

James rolls his eyes. “I’d deal with it, if you’d have a good reason for the break-up.”

“What more of a reason do you need?” Sirius is now seriously annoyed. “When one person is not in love with the other anymore, there’s nothing else you can do but break-up. That’s just life, and yes, it sucks, but it happens, and it’s no one’s fault.”

James, however, insists on being stubborn. “I would accept that reason. So, let me put it this way: if one of you can look me in the eyes and tell me that he’s not in love with the other anymore, I’ll drop the topic forever and I’ll never bring it up again.”

Sirius pinches the bridge of his nose and decides to just accept his faith. “Moony, just tell him.”

Startled, Remus jerks his head up, from where he was intently studying a loose thread on his jumper. “What? Why?”

Sirius glances at him. “Because I don’t know about you, but I’m not particularly enjoying this conversation. I’d rather get this over with as soon as possible.”

“Yeah, okay,” Remus says. “Why me then?”

“Because that was the exact reason you broke up with me three years ago!”

“We could just wait till he’s sober,” Remus mutters.

“I want to get this over with, so please, just say it,” Sirius says frustrated.

“I just don’t know if we should indulge his drunken demands.”

Sirius now really loses his patience. “Moony, just tell Prongs you broke up with me because you weren’t in love with me anymore!”

“Yes, Moony,” James says in a mocking tone, and Merlin, Sirius could actually strangle him right now. “Tell me you broke up with Padfoot because you weren’t in love with him anymore.”

Remus just gives James an angry look.

Sirius sighs. “Look, Moons. If you’re worried about hurting my feelings, it’s fine. I already know, have known for the last three years. Hearing you say it now isn’t going to kill me.”

Remus opens and closes his mouth, and then stares down at his sleeve again, looking miserable.

“Moony,” Sirius says. “Why can’t you just tell him-”

“Cause Moony’s a terrible liar!” James interjects. “He can’t get the words over his lips, especially not in front of you.”

Sirius shakes his head and can’t quite keep the bitterness out of his voice. “He had no trouble saying it three years ago, so why would it be a problem now?”

Remus’s head snaps up to look at Sirius. “I never said I wasn’t in love with you anymore three years ago!” He flushes bright red and looks away again. “What I said was-”

“I know what you said!” Sirius interrupts. Like he’d ever forget the words that made his entire world come crumbling down. “You said you wanted to end things between us, because you didn’t want to be with me anymore. Why else would you not want to be with me anymore?”

“It’s because of the werewolf thiiiiing!” James shouts, making Remus and Sirius flinch.

“What?” Sirius asks, confused. “No, that can’t be. It can’t be because of the werewolf thing. I’ve never once made an issue of that.”

“That was exactly the problem!” Remus snaps. “You acting like it was nothing. You didn’t understand how much it would affect you, how much it would affect your whole life. You didn’t comprehend-”

“I comprehended just fine!” Sirius says, raising his voice in anger. “I comprehended all of it! I comprehended that we’d never have much money, as you’ll never be able to get a steady, decent job, I comprehended that we’d never be able to live in one place for too long, as eventually it’ll raise suspicion, I comprehended that there’d be parts of society we’ll always be left out of, due to prejudice and stigma. I did comprehend, I just didn’t care, and that’s a difference!”

“How?” Remus stares at him in utter disbelief. “How could you not-”

“Because I fucking loved you!” Sirius shouts. “I’d have given up everything for you.”

Remus shakes his head. “Then you must understand how, for that exact same reason, I couldn’t let you do that.”

“That was never your decision to make,” Sirius hisses. “It was mine! And I had decided long ago that it’d be you, no matter what.”

Remus stares at him again, and Sirius can hardly bear to see the emotions in his eyes. Emotions he can’t figure out. For a moment, he thinks Remus will get angry, but then he falls back against the couch and crosses his arms in front of his chest. “You tell him then. Tell him how I screwed everything up, and how you’re completely over me now and couldn’t possibly love me anymore.”

“Merlin, Remus, you’re such an idiot!”

Now Remus glares at him. “You’ve told me on multiple occasions how you’ve gotten over me.”

“Because I thought you had a good reason for breaking up with me!” Sirius replies. “I thought you had a good reason, and I didn’t want to make you feel guilty by letting you know how much of a fucking mess I still am, and how much I fucking miss you every day, even when we’re bloody together!”

“What are you saying?” Remus asks, voice suddenly trembling. “Are you saying that you’re not over me?”

“Are you saying that you didn’t fall out of love with me?”

Remus just stares at Sirius and Sirius just stares at Remus. He has no idea how to proceed, or how to go back. Back to half an hour ago or back to three years ago, he doesn’t even know.

They only come out of their contemplation by a drunken James loudly breaking the silence. “Still haven’t heard any reasooooons!”

Sirius apparates at a safe distance from the Potters’ home and starts dragging James towards his front door.

“Padderfootsie,” James mumbles. “D’you know how many werewolves have families? Of their own? So partners, not parents? I mean, I assume they all have parents, right? Where else would they come from? They don’t just shoot out of the floor.” James starts giggling again. “Can you imagine?”

“Prongs, please, I-”

“Zero!” James exclaims. “None whatsoever! It’s never been done! Too much weirdness about starting families when it comes to “dark creatures”.” He almost sticks Sirius’s eye out at the air quotes he makes around “dark creatures”.

Sirius doesn’t respond, so James continues. “Moony can’t just fall head over heels in love and fully throw himself into it with his whole being, without any doubts, like you and I can. Not with each other, of course. With Remus and Lily. Remus or Lily. Not both. Well both, but you know, one for each. You Remus, me Lily.”

Sirius really wants to get James inside as soon as possible, but James wiggles himself free from his grip to face him, and grabs his shoulders. “I know how much he has hurt you, I know. All I'm saying is, it’s different for Moony, but that doesn’t mean he loves you any less.”

“Merlin, Prongs.” Sirius swallows against a sudden lump in his throat. “I don’t know anymore if I never want you to get this drunk again, or wish that you’d gotten this drunk three years ago.”

Lily slams open the door and stalks into Sirius’s flat.

“Why, good day to you, Lilyflower.”

“Don’t you ‘Lilyflower’ me, Black,” Lily snarls.

Sirius rolls his eyes. “Aren’t you a ray of sunshine this afternoon.”

“Yes,” Lily says sarcastically, while taking a Butterbeer out of the fridge. “Waking up to find your husband knocked out on the couch really does wonders for your mood.”

“Well, you should be thanking me for the fact that he even was on the couch, instead of in a ditch somewhere.”

Lily swallows down a gulp of Butterbeer without breaking eye contact. “I would have preferred the ditch.”

Lily flops down on the couch with her drink and eyes Sirius for a while. “What are you doing?” She asks, after watching him pull on a fancy shirt and fixing his hair in front of the mirror.

“I got a date,” Sirius simply says.

Lily chokes on her next sip. “A...” She coughs a few times. “A date? You haven’t had a date since- in a long time.” She studies Sirius’s face, noting how, despite his efforts to look composed, he’s brimming with excitement. “That’s... That’s good, Pads. I’m happy for you.”

There’s a knock on the door.

Lily, not curious at all, turns around on the couch so she can watch the door as Sirius opens. Her eyes widen, and she can’t help how a small gasp escapes her lips, when she sees Remus Lupin standing there. He’s wearing his best slacks and his nicest jumper, and has even styled his hair. Lily looks with astonishment at the boys nervously staring and smiling at each other, dressed to the nines and well-groomed, like they didn’t eat pizza from the floor of Remus’s flat wearing stained sweatpants after not showering for days just the week before.

“Hi,” Remus says.

“Hi,” Sirius says.

“Hi!” Lily shouts.

Remus jumps, only now realising Lily is in the room. He blushes furiously and runs a hand through his previously well-groomed hair. “Oh, Lils, hi. I didn’t see you there. How are you? Is Prongs still alive?”

“Yes,” Lily replies solemnly. “I’m waiting for him to be sober enough before I kill him.” She gestures with her bottle between the two boys. “So what’s this? Are you two picking things up again?”

“No,” Sirius says hesitantly. “We’re more like... starting over?” A smile appears on his face with such genuine happiness as Lily hasn’t seen on him in... what? Three years? “This is our first date!” He adds.

Lily can’t help but smile back at him, bad mood almost forgotten.

“Well,” Sirius says. “We’ll better get going. There’re some left-over pumpkin pastries in the fridge, and there’s stuff for grilled cheese, but try not to burn anything this time.”

“Right,” Lily says. “You boys have fun then!”

After the door closes behind them, Lily turns around and slides back down on the couch. A huge grin spreads across her face. It’s been a long three years for all of them, but maybe, just maybe, all will be right with the world again.

[kyotakumrau]

2020.12.21 The World You Live In at Zepp Tokyo, 2nd event report

Fujieda again started with greetings, introduced himself and Takabayashi and then asked for applause for the band members.

And we got quite a surprise!

Kaoru and Toshiya came on stage!

Thus making Tokyo the only place where band members changed for each slot/session. As much as I'd love to see Kyo again I was happy as my friend only went to Tokyo and she's Toshiya's fan😊

F: please introduce yourself.

Kaoru: you already did lol. I'm Kaoru.

T: I'm Toshiya.

F: the last video you just watched was different from other sessions. The trailer for the concert film screenings that will start from February. It's something only you know right now. As you can imagine from the title it will be something similar to this, with the band members coming for the talk after.

K talked a bit about the situation as well.

T: it's still difficult to hold concerts, but this is something we can do. So I hope you will look forward to it.

Next F started the 'merch items introduction corner', he passed the items to the members.

K: I was watching the 1st slot and we talked about them in Osaka, too. (he talked more about the items and what members said)

F: yes, everything can fit in the pouch so it's a very useful item. You can buy all merch items and put then in the pouch and take home like that. Let's look at Toshiya's big pick key chains (he pronunced that very carefully😂)

They talked about members signs and company logos when suddenly K requested to have to lights in the venue set brighter so he could see everyone.

After that F announced they wil start with questions from the fans, passed the part of papers to others, but K gave his to F saying it's better if he chooses.

T: ok, I have a good one! 'It was Die's birthday yesterday, did you send him a birthday message? And are there any memorable presents you've received in the past?'

T: I got a bicycle. I was really happy at first, but then it was stolen from the parking area.

F: when was it?

T (I didn't catch it but from the context it must have been quite early on in their career)

F: during the tour?

T: yeah, we were always giving each other something for our birthdays, every year, but as years passed it got more difficult to choose something good and we then just stopped.

F: how about you, K?

K: I got a Mickey Mouse, about this size (he showed us with his hand, about 1m tall).

F: 'how do you deal with feeling tired?'

K: I go for a massage.

F: only during the tour?

K: anytime.

F: when the most? When writing songs?

K (laughing): but we're always writing songs

T: for me it's sauna.

F: do you often go when just staying at home?

T: for example after the gym

Ta: 'what did you eat most often during the stay at home period?'

K: ...what did I eat, what about you, Tooru?

Ta: sausages.

The whole venue kinda rotfled 🤣🤣🤣

F: that's cute😆

Ta: it's something I can usually only eat at home.

K: ...something I was really into...(still thinking)....(thinking)

F: for me it was Jiro-ken ramen.

T: at home?! So you weren't really staying at home?

F: I gained some weight after the overseas tour. I started to diet then, and one day a week, a cheat day, I could eat whatever I wanted. My cheat choice was Jiro, either at the restaurants or to take away.

K: ...what was it for me...

F: maybe nabe you talked about before? (in Osaka)

K wasn't impressed 😆

T: canned mackerel for me.

F: for when you drink etc? No, just like that?

They all laughed here a bit.

Suddenly K jumped in with a new topic.

K: in Osaka you talked about the theme behind Kyo's outfit, you said it was pink but he pointed his green hair as the main point.

F: that was difficult.

K: tbh I also thought the main idea was pink (he also talked about Kyo's use of Kansai dialect)

T: 'what were you able to do after becoming an adult?'

F: there's a lot of food people start eating when they grow up.

T: food topic again? 😆

F: for example for me it was raisins.

T: as I get older I can drink more. When we just debuted I couldn't drink at all.

F: drinking wine?

T: おっさんだから・'cause I'm an old guy.

K started talking about the food he couldn't handle when he was small but the next question kinda made me forget it 😅

' 'wet cat food is actually quite good, have you ever tried?'

F: I have a cat and sometimes when I give my cat wet food some will get on my fingers. I'd just lick it. You know some of it, the mackerel or tuna, it looks so good.

T: please send me a video when you eat cat food next time.

😂

(but to be fair most of canned cat food in Japan is 100% fish🤷‍♀️)

K: 'when you can tour again what local specialities do you want to eat?'

F: motsunabe in Fukuoka

T: miso type?

F: of course (if not Shinya would kill him)

K: what did you eat in Sendai?

F: bento

K: in Nagoya?

F: nothing special

T: we had normal bento, but it was miso katsu (Nagoya's style cutlet)

F: but if it's not in a restaurant it's not the same. Anything you want to eat, T?

T: Beki soba from Niigata.

F: have you tried it before?

T: when we went there on a tour, I really like soba.

They talked but more about food, tare katsu, okonomiyaki from Hiro and Jiro again.

T: is Jiro really that good?

F: 😍

K: I've tried it before, but it's (just) okay.

F: it's all about how the noodles taste (type of flour etc)

(more food talk, choosing between salt and tare options)

K: 'what's your favorite onigiri (rice ball)?'

F: how about you, K?

K: I don't eat onigiri.

T: Me also, but if I have to choose it's sujiko/salted salmon roe.

K (about not eating onigiri much): right, you only eat soba.

T then told us the story how much he loved salmon roe even as a child. When he was quite small he went shopping to the local supermarket with his grandmother. When he saw salmon roe in the shop he just started eating it directly from the shelf/container. Of course when his grandmother and supermarket staff found out it got very noisy, but because he was so young it was forgiven.

(back to onigiri topic)

Ta: salmon for me.

F: oh that is nice, I love the most tamago-kake-gohan rice ball (TKG is a very simple, traditional Japanese breakfast dish - just rice with a raw egg eaten with soy sauce, sometimes other toppings), the Newdays chain is selling them

K: the chain operates only in this area, no?

F explained that there are Newdays in other places too, fe Sendai. He also really got into explaining all pros incl the tasty gooey filling inside of the rice ball.

K (imitating F) oh that's nice 😂

F: 'it got so cold recently, what's your favourite season?'

T: spring or fall, I don't hate winter but I definitely don't like summer.

K: fall. (he said as this year wasn't too cold he could go out a bit during breaks)

F: so 2~3 weeks ago was your fav time.

K: here in Tokyo at least.

F: 'as we're staying home much more now do you have a recommended tv series or a channel?' (not just a movie)

K: Cobra kai.

F: ah, you tweeted about it.

K: it will be on Netflix next month, the 3rd season.

K talked about The Karate Kid (Japanese title 'Best Kid').

F: I don't know it.

Ta: me too.

K (shocked): you're serious???

T: I know, of course.

F: 'Best Kid'? 'Best Fit?'

T: just stop it🙃

F: how about your recommendation, T?

T: The BOYS on Prime.

K: I haven't seen it, but it seems interesting.

T: it is! I also like BOSCH. I'm just watching like after work and so on.

After that K talked about how cinema with the capacity reduced by half was nice because you could put your bag on the seat next to you etc, but recently came back to the full house (Demon Slayer did that...)

F: 'how do you feel being in front of people first time in a while?'

T: I'm sorry it has to be done this way

F: don't say that😆

(missed K's reply)

T: it's tiring to be in front of people.

F: but we do it in an interesting way.

T: yeah.

T: 'what's your favourite game? Even including older ones like famicon?'

K: games?

T: Spelunker on Amicon😆

T/K in agreement: where you die so quickly

K: PS5 is so popular, I didn't win.

F: it seems Kyo won once but the information he submitted had a mistake.

K: I applied for Sony's lottery and Big Camera's.

F: you don't want PS5, T?

T: recently I don't play.

K: what about the... what was it Tsushima?

They all reacted with 'ah'

F: what kind of game is it?

K: don't ask me😅 but it looks interesting.

T: it seems to be very popular abroad.

F: 'what's your favourite way to eat ozoni?'

(A new year soup with rice cakes)

Ta: the soy sauce based soup, with grilled mochi.

F: but what ingredients do you add?

K: isn't that way too detailed??

Ta (tries): spring onion etc

K listed grilled mochi, spinach, carrot etc. Then he told us about his family tradition to properly make rice cakes for New year, pounding was so loud even if you wanted to watch tv, you couldn't. But then they had enough for a month.

T: soy sauce style.

F: with miso or?

T: I said soy sauce.

F: what ingredients?

T: rice cakes, spinach, and what is that... (he started to make circles with his hand) ...?

F: naruto?

T (yeah that/nods)

F: in my family we do soy sauce, rice cakes, carrot, fish cakes etc.

K (ignoring F comment that they should finish now, in a teasing way): what about osechi, which dishes do you like?

F: konbu maki or kurikinton.

K: how about you, T?

T: that egg dish that is kinda like this (he gestured the shape again)?

Ta: tatemaki?

F: datemaki!

T: I think it's datemaki.

K: I like that beef roll with carrot and green beans inside (its 牛肉の八幡巻き)

F (making very dreamy face): Aaaaaaah that😍 green beans are so good.

F: ok, thank you all.

K: what about Tooru (Ta)?

F: it's time, sorry.

Last comments.

Toshiya: thank you all for gathering here despite the COVID situation. It's difficult to do concerts now so we tried doing film screenings. In difficult times like this it's not only about the band members, there's our staff and also the venues. I'd love to play concerts again, please wait for us.

Kaoru: it is a difficult situation to share my personal opinion... if we can't do the concerts in a way everyone can enjoy... enjoy, it will affect our relationship of mutual trust. I think this (COVID) situation will continue for some time still, so I think it's better to go with the film screening events. But we will keep checking the situation. Please stay healthy and I hope all of you will come to watch it.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Surveys #431-432

two biggins’ in one, beware the long post.

Do you own any Funko Pop! figurines? No. How many cats and dogs have you had as pets in your lifetime? I couldn't possibly count the cats. A lot. We've had I wanna say eight dogs through my entire life. Can your mom and/or dad play any instruments, or how about anyone else in your family? No. My older sister played the clarinet in school, though. Have you ever colored in an adult coloring book as a stress reliever? I have, but they don't really affect my stress level. Can you crack crab legs without a tool? UGH EW I hate crab legs. So mushy and just... ew. I don't think I've tried to without a tool. How many light sources are in the room you’re in? Excluding the natural light out my windows, three. What’s your favorite thing to put on bagels? Just your usual cream cheese. Who’s your favorite director? Tim Burton. I love his style. Bats: cute or gross? Bats are SO goddamn cute. What was the last really intense pain you felt? I had a sudden pain in my chest the other day that scared me quite a bit. Would you rather vacation by a beach or a lake? A lake, for sure. How would you feel about traveling abroad alone? I'd be way too lonely. What is your father's middle name? John. Where did your last kiss take place? The airport. Which movie villain do you find the most terrifying? Probably Jason. A masked guy just casually pursuing you with a knife is horrifying to me. If you married your favorite celebrity what would your last name be? Fischbach alskdfla;wer;lkwera;wle Do you stick your tongue out often in pictures? No. Which one of your family members are you closest to? My ma. Would you rather have name brand shoes or name brand clothes? Shoes. It's very important for them to be comfy for me. Are you a good liar? Yes. :x Are you proud of your parents? Yeah. If you could get backstage tickets to ANY concert - which would you pick? If Mom was with me, Metallica. She would actually fucking die if she met them. Like she cried and laughed with joy when she found out about the concert in Raleigh some years ago, and we thought we were going to go, but yeah, money. Which is better: orange or grape soda? Orange cream soda. Grape soda is so gross. Was the last thing you ate hot or cold? It was room temperature. Who was the last person in your house who isn’t family? Our landlord/family friend. I think. What color was the last swimsuit you wore? Black. Can you remember the last song you listened to? I'm listening to "Thoughts & Prayers" by Motionless In White right now. Have you ever been dumped really harshly? Ha, that is a colossal understatement... Can you do a back flip, or anything else of that sort? Definitely not. I couldn't even do stuff like that as a kid. Do you have any exes you can’t stand anymore? No. What happened to cause you to feel that way about them? ^ Are you more of a phone or a computer person? Computer, for sure. Do you have a job, and if so, where do you work? No. If not, do you want one? Not right now. I want to focus on the gym and getting in shape. Do any medical afflictions run in your family? A whole lot. What’s your favorite Mexican dish? Shrimp quesadillas. Or rice with cheese sauce. Have you ever been to a professional sports game? Yeah, hockey and baseball. Do you prefer pads, tampons or something else? I'm actually conflicted on this right now. I use tampons, but there are reasons I don't really like them and am considering something else. Have you ever ordered a specially made cake from a cake shop? Not me myself, but Mom has. What months were you and your siblings born in? My two immediate sisters were born in April and June. What did you have for dinner last night? Uhhhhh... I want to say I had a chicken pesto bowl? Have you ever had sex in/on a vehicle? No, that sounds so uncomfortable. Do you do anything to groom your eyebrows? No. I don't care about that anymore. Has your town ever flooded? Oh, for sure. Hurricane Floyd from when I was... I wanna say two or three WRECKED my area. Have you ever played at the McDonald’s play place? Yeah. That was a blast as a kiddo. Have you ever taken a picture of snow? Yeah. Do you cry easily? Very. Are you happy with where you live? No. The suburbs suck. I miss living in the country so much. Do people ever mistake you for being a different race? No. Do you hate the last person you kissed? No, she's my best friend in the whole world. What genre is your favorite movie? I actually don't know what it's considered? It's a kids movie, though. Who was the last person you were in a car with? My mom. Do you like the picture on your license/I.D. card? My permit picture is fucking hideous. When was the last time somebody hit on you? *shrug* Was the last person you met a male or female? A guy - my personal trainer. What brand is your underwear? I'm in my pjs, and only a madman would wear underwear to bed. What’s your favorite Thanksgiving food? Just the rolls, really, lol. I'm not a big fan of Thanksgiving foods at all. Do you have a TV in your room? No, because I don't watch TV. Are any of your electronics charging right now? My laptop always is, though I know you shouldn't do that. I need to charge my phone, too. What was the last video game you played? Video game, not computer, I want to say uh... The Legend of Spyro: Dawn of the Dragon? What’s the biggest promise someone’s ever made to you? Did they keep it? To never leave me. He didn't. Google, Bing, or Yahoo? Google. What was the last song you had on repeat? The song I mentioned earlier. Who is your favorite person to watch on YouTube? Markiplier. :') How many college degrees do you want? It'd be nice to have a Bachelor's in SOMETHING, but I'm not returning to school. Three tries was enough money down the drain. Can you wink? Yeah. Do you own any jerseys? No. Have you ever tried to snort Pixie Stix as a child, or even an adult? Uh, no. Do you like going to baby showers? Do you go only for the cake? No. The last time Jason and I hung out in any capacity was his brother's wife's baby shower, and it's a bad memory. As well, it just reminds me of what I once wanted with him. I'll go to them and be okay, but definitely not thrilled. Has there ever been a time in your life, you felt sexually undecided? Yes, especially in the I want to say 8th grade. I had an inescapable crisis that literally lasted a whole week (or maybe more) forcing myself to believe I was straight, despite already showing but denying bisexual attractions. I was religious back then, so believed if I wasn't straight, I'd go to Hell. Then I came out as bisexual in uhhhh... 2018 I wanna say, and that was a long examination of my feelings. It felt like a massive weight off my shoulders when I accepted it. I felt legit happy. Do you think tattoos and piercings are sexy on the opposite sex? ugggghhhhh yes Do people ever ask you to do things they’re too short to accomplish? No. What color are the headphones you have at this moment in time? My earbuds are pink and white. Ever choked severely on something during lunch at your school? No. Do you eat more vegetables or fruits? What’s your favorite fruit/veggie? Fruits, for sure. My fave is strawberries. What would you say is the color of your favorite bra? I have a pink and black lacy one that is super cute, but it's too small for me right now. It just stays in my drawer. Is anyone in your family a firefighter? Who is it anyway? No. What do you usually buy when you go to the dollar store? If I'm stopping there for a snack (which is usually the only time we stop by one), I tend to get a honeybun. Ever peed in the pool? Be honest! No, that is so gross. When you’re older, what kind of house do you want to live in? I want a medium-sized house that's semi-isolated in the woods. I'd love a nice path to walk down and take photos, a catio for Roman or whatever cat I may have in the future... stuff like that. I need lots of nature. Where do you want to get married? In some sort of gothic building, though I'm sure that would be a WILDLY expensive venue, so I doubt that'll happen. Realistically, either in the woods or even a massive flower garden. Do you plan on having both your parents at your wedding? Yes. What is your favorite childhood TV show? Pokemon. Honestly, do you like school? No, I didn't. Last thing that made you cry? PTSD. Honestly, are you keeping a big secret right now? No big secrets, no. Last person you took a walk with? Sara, years ago. Have you ever liked someone who didn’t like you back? Oh, have I... Who was the last person to actually pick you up in the air? Probably Jason, honestly. Does any part of your body hurt? My non-existent abs are killing me from exercising yesterday. If you had to choose between a million bucks or to be able to change a regret what would you do? While it's tempting, hand me the cash. Can you keep a secret? Absolutely. You tell me a secret, you can guarantee I'll be keeping it between you and me. Your favorite romantic movie? The Notebook. How do you feel about Valentine’s Day? I honestly like it. I love the aesthetic of it, and I know people say "well you should celebrate love every day," and while that's right, what's so wrong about nationally designating a specific day to appreciate it? I think it's a very cute holiday. Who was the last person you took a picture with? My sister Katie. Do your jeans have rips, tears, and holes in them? I haven't worn jeans in yeeeeaaaarrrrssss. When I did though, I loved jeans like that, especially for skinny jeans. Do you celebrate 420?No. Have you ever kicked a vending machine? No. How do you eat Oreos? I prefer to just dip them in milk. If that's unavailable, I separate the two parts, eat the cream, and then the two cookies. Do you wear your shoes in the house? No. Would you survive in prison? Absofuckinglutely not. It's dark, but just to be entirely honest, I'd probably find a way to kill myself. Ever been to Georgia? I've been through it. Do you get your hair cut every month? Not every month, no. It needs a trim right now badly, though.

Current relationship in detail. I'm single and should be. If you were kicked out of your house, who would you call/go to? My dad. List things you spend money on in an average week. Nothing. Rate each of your sexual partners (if any) from 1-10. He was honestly a 10 lmao like I don't have a lot of experience at all, but yeah. Post the last FB group/page that you joined. I actually don't remember because I've been on break from Facebook for around a month. Would you parents be mad if you were in a relationship? No... Think of the last person you had sex with. Do you think they’ve slept with anyone else since they last slept with you? I'm sure he has. He dated someone right after me for like... eight months or something? Is there someone that you believe you will always be attached to? I think that's very obvious by now. What board games are you good at? Idk, I don't really enjoy board games. Is there a sport/hobby you keep thinking about taking up, but that you’ve never quite gotten around to starting? Definitely no sports, but I've been wanting to get back into video editing. I just... haven't, even though I have the software. Do you think pranks like egging/toilet-papering someone's house are funny or immature? They're incredibly immature. I see zero humor in them. Do you think “sleeve tattoos” are a good idea? They're hot as fuck, man. Is there anything in particular that your parents argue about? What? I'll just say they're divorced for good reasons. Do you ever actually read the “Terms and Services” when you sign up for websites and such? No. If you have a handheld games console (a DS or GameBoy, for example), how often do you use it? Almost never. Your phone is ringing. It’s the person you fell hardest for, what do you say? Realistically, I wouldn't answer because I don't answer numbers I don't recognize. Hypothetically, if I knew it was him, I'd probably say something along the lines of, "Hey J, are you okay?", because something must be seriously wrong if he wants to talk to me of all people. If your best friend was kicked out, would your parents let him/her live with you? Mom absolutely would. Are you afraid of falling in love? I'm terrified of it. Is there anybody you wish you could be with right now? I wish I didn't. Have you ever kissed someone & wished you didn’t? Yes: Tyler. Did you get kissed last night? Haven't been kissed in years. Do you enjoy going through a carwash? Bring out the rainbow soap and it's hype lmao. How did you get most of your scars? My cat, ha ha. He sometimes plays way too rough, and I just scar very easily. Ever had to take an inkblot test? Yes, when I went to a psychologist. Have you ever been in trouble for something you honestly didn’t do? Maybe? Have you ever seriously slapped someone in anger? My sister as a kid on her arm. Safe to say I got in trouble for it. What/who woke you up this morning? Just my body. Who was the last person to be in your bedroom besides you? Mom. What’s one of your locked text messages? da;lsd;fakwer I have one locked from Sara that says something like, "You are so beautiful." I cried. Have you ever finished a game of Monopoly? I think? Jason and I used to play the digital one you could download on the PS3. Is there anyone you know who’s in any way paralyzed? No. I mean, I know of a girl who went to my school who was paralyzed from the waist down in an accident, but I didn't/don't know her personally. She was a MASSIVE deal in my education community. Like you would see "prayers for (name)" on school and church signs. The truth all comes out when someone is drunk, true? Usually true. I sometimes think back on the one time Jason was drunk, and he just told me in the most adoring voice, "I love you, Brittany." It's painful as fuck to remember. I really do wonder if he meant it, given this was in the later half of our relationship. When was the last time you felt disappointed in yourself? Constantly. How about feeling disappointed in someone else? I dunno. For you, do you commonly feel more jealousy or envy? I definitely experience envy more often. Do you rely on the heads/tails flipping of a coin sometimes for decisions? No. Do you have any specific chores you do around the house? I'm supposed to empty the dishwasher in particular. For you, does comfort or fashion come first in dressing? Comfort, 100%. Have you had two friends that absolutely hated each other? No. Do you like Laffy Taffy? I do. That sounds pretty good right about now. Do you prefer electric or manual pencil sharpeners? Electric. Are your biceps at all noticeable? Yeah, no. Have you ever seen a walrus? Yeah, at SeaWorld as a kid. Did you ever have one of those Easy Bake ovens as a kid? Yeah. My little sister in particular was obsessed. Does your bathroom have a theme to it? No. From inside of your house, how many doors lead outside? Two. Are there a lot of trees in your yard? No. :/ I miss that. Have you ever liked someone that treated you like crap? No. Have a best friend? Yeah. :') Does it bother you when your best friend does stuff without you? That is so childish. Everyone needs space sometimes. But to answer the question, considering she lives many states away from me, obviously not. Is there a secret you’ve never told your parents? Yes. Does anyone hate you? I wouldn't at all be surprised if Jason does. Colleen might, but I really don't give a shit if she does. What’s the one thing you regret more than anything? The way I spoke to Jason after the breakup. If only I could take those letters back. Do you remember important dates? I am VERY bad at dates, doesn't matter how important they are. What’s some lyrics from a song that means a lot to you? "For such a little thing, you sure are in your own way" from a Mother Mother song. Who gives the best advice? Sara. Who do you usually see in your dreams? :) Jason is nearly a permanent fixture. Jeez, I'm bringing him up a lot in this one. I'm surprised my PTSD isn't dragging me into a pit for it. What type of cake did you last eat? Uhhh I wanna say double chocolate? Mom got two slices from the store for me and herself a long time ago. How many of your friends are gay or bisexual? A large number. I don't feel like counting. What’s your favorite type of sandwich? Just your usual peanut butter and jelly. When was the last time someone asked you out? Did you accept or decline? Years ago by Girt. I accepted. Do you like The Offspring? Sure, I like a handful of their songs. One pillow or two? I sleep with two. Do you like Mad Libs? Sure, they can be funny. Are you suicidal? Well damn, just throw that in there. Anyway, no. I'll admit I've had very brief, passive thoughts very rarely as of the late, just wondering if there really is a point to me being here, but I'm not actively suicidal at all rn. Where do your grandparents live? They're dead. When alive though, they lived in Florida and Michigan. Do you cut yourself? And this one? No, I haven't in many years. What is your pet’s name? Roman and Venus. Have you ever been to Canada? No, but I'd love to visit. Aren’t babies overrated? "Overrated" is definitely the wrong word... I don't particularly find a lot of babies cute and I don't want my own, but they're not overrated. Have a built-in pool in your backyard? Never have. Ever won yourself a stuffed animal? Yeah. Ever had someone else win you a stuffed animal? Yes. Ever been to a circus? No. I wouldn't set foot into one. Ever shot animals? I never, ever could. Do you consider yourself intelligent? I USED to. I think I'm dumb as shit now. School knowledge did not latch onto me well, I guess. Have you ever run away from home? Yes. It was so overdramatic. I came back hours later because I had my phone and Mom texted me threatening to call the cops. Do you put family first, friends, relationships, school, or something else? I will never put my mental health behind anything/one again. What’s something you’ve stood up for in the past? When Colleen and I were friends in middle school, we both spoke before the class in absolute disgust at how our classmates were treating our poor substitute teacher. Colleen had AT them, while I was more tame about it but still wanted to bash into their heads that they were all being absolute trash to the poor man. What’s something you worked extremely hard to get? My mental wellbeing. Granted, I'm not exactly "well" now, but once upon a time I was living in the deepest ocean trench as far as depression goes. Are you satisfied with your body image? Hell no. I really, really, really hope loyally going to the gym will help me with that. Have you ever been labeled negatively or otherwise been called something extremely derogatory? Not that I know of. Have you ever seriously taken advantage of someone or been taken advantage of? No. Have you ever been seriously ill? Mentally, immensely. Physically, not really. I've had some nasty stomach bugs, but nothing truly severe. Have you ever befriended a former enemy? Ha, it's funny, I used to hate Jason's first ex/heartbreak for how badly she hurt him. Like she could've been falling off the face of the earth with only me to save her, and I'd let her keep falling. I hated her. Yet now we're Facebook friends and comment on each other's stuff like it's nothing, ha ha. She reached out to me a few years ago to apologize for high school stuff (she also hated me for Juan - her ex or something along those lines - being interested in me instead of her), we chatted a bit, and now I think she's great. If you’re not religious, would you ever pray as a last resort? If you are religious, do you often pray for other people? I don't pray anymore. That's all I'll say to keep this from becoming potentially very offensive. Have you ever dated someone, then after you dated they came out of the closet or switched (for lack of a better word) sexual orientation? I'm pretty sure my middle school boyfriend Aaron is gay, but I'm not certain. He vanished from Facebook a long time ago. Has a boy/girl ever walked a ridiculous distance just to see you? How about vice versa? I tried doing that the night of the breakup. By car, I know it was a seven-minute drive, but walking there, never mind at night, was ludicrous. I only didn't manage because after a few minutes, Mom came after me and kept cutting me off with the car. When was the last time you felt really uncomfortable? Right now. My abs REALLY hurt, and I'm also cramping like a motherfucker after not having a period for 3+ months because of TMS therapy. I'm still pissed about how it had a physical effect on me, but didn't mentally do what it was meant to. Is there anything that your mom is really known for as to how she is as a person? She is very, very loving and lives to help others. Who have you been talking to the most today? Nobody, really. I've spoken with Mom obviously, but for the most part, today's been quiet. Are you nosy? I can be pretty damn nosy, yes. What’s the meanest thing you have done to a friend? Consistently flirted with her boyfriend behind her back. I was 12, okay? If your ex called you crying, what would it most likely be about? THE ex, I have no idea. I don't know what's going on in his life, besides his mother dying quite a few months ago, but I don't see why he'd contact me about that. Who was the best kisser out of all the people you have kissed? Jason. Have you ever been told that you have an annoying laugh? No, but I think I do.

[kvngjoong]

she was a rainbow [three - seo changbin]

→ seo changbin x f!you, university!au, in which changbin discovers that his feelings aren’t as easy to understand as he first may have thought → 7.4k+, it’s fluff. all fluff and cute things, with a last minute confession

part 3 of 3

“Do you remember when I got mad at you about the project?”

“Mhm.” Changbin was busy eating his noodles and didn’t pick up on the signs you were showing him. He tries to make a joke, since when he looks up you look a little sad. It was just the downturned lips and sparkly eyes. Glassy. Changbin means glassy. “You told me that you wouldn’t talk to me again.”

You hum, facing the table for a little longer than usual. “I was a bitch ‘cause my boyfriend and I broke up.”

“I didn’t know you had a boyfriend,” Changbin replies honestly. He should have expected it. You both hadn’t know each other that long then, and you already had broken up with your boyfriend? It surprises him. It angers him that someone hadn’t appreciated you enough to love you.

“Hwang Hyunjin?” His name burns some hatred into Changbin. That asshole? Yeah, everyone know who Hyunjin was. He didn’t realise you two dated, and he would have warned against it if he did know, even though you both weren’t that close. “Yeah, I should have realised that was going to end up that way.”

Changbin has a pick of everyone he wants.

Realistically, it’s always been the same for the Korean boy. He’s rich, he’s handsome and like hell does he know it. Ever since high school when girls would flock around him to see whether he really was that flawless in real life (he was, for the record) and if his hair really did stand to be the most beautiful style on the grounds. His spoiled ways proved to be too much for people to handle and they quickly disregarded him leaving the best option for him being to move abroad and act like he never even knew the streets of the various other countries he lived in.

He used people and he didn’t care, and that never really changed. Sure, he had two good friends. The first was a boy named Chan who usually would be found in the music production rooms with his headphones on, creating new songs like the genius kid he is. Chan is from Australia and didn’t have any other friends. Seeing him as, for lack of a better description, weak, Changbin managed to make friends with Chan but then realised he truly did value the friendship he had. Then there was Jisung, the first year student who had helped Changbin out in the music department when he first started. Changbin, in his own way, admired Jisung for carrying on his passion for music despite studying International Business. Another rich kid that Changbin emphasised with too much.

But Changbin realised in university he can’t be the person he used to be. There’s no cliques like in high school, the majority of people are just genuinely interested in studying and he often looks stupid when he expects the girls to come flocking in the clubs. His pearly white smile and equally white trainers don’t attract the attention he wants.

Not that he doesn’t get any. Changbin might not have the same charm as before but girls do love him. They love his persona and how if you hang around with him you automatically get the reputation of dating a rich kid who had a lot of money to spend which his parents sent him every week. Girls used him, actually. They used him for the reputation like he used to use them for the same thing.

It drives someone to loneliness, actually.

Changbin sits alone in lectures now. He used to sit in the middle with girls either side, sometimes not paying attention but often having a girl or two chatting about a possible date and another on the phone sending him photos he shouldn’t have been looking at in the middle of a lecture.

He walks into his class on international markets, his least favourite unit this year, expecting the back row of the lecture theatre to be completely empty like always. He pulls out one earphone, analysing the girl sat in the middle of the back row with an emotionless face; reading a book, studying each word, lost in the fantasy world which is created from it.

Changbin frowns. He takes a seat two places down and uses the seat to his left to keep his bag on so he can easily pull out his phone later to concentrate on something other than his lecturer who is the quietest, but most lovely Chinese lady to exist. The act manages to catch your attention as you don’t expect it. Your eyes meet Changbin’s and he feels like he’s frozen for a second.

“Sorry,” you mumble quickly, closing your book shut. Changbin is stuck looking at you so forgets to check what you’re reading. He hopes it’s worthwhile. “Do you want me to move up?”

Changbin shakes his head. He brings his fingers back through his freshly washed hair as he clears his throat and looks away. “It’s fine. Sorry.”

“You don’t need to apologise.”

When Changbin didn’t spend his Saturday nights watching anime and checking snapchat to see if there was a party he could jump in on, he would have took this as an opportunity to continue speaking to you. Right now he looks back towards the front of the lecture hall and scratches his ear as he sighs. He doesn’t care, if he’s honest.

“This is the lecture on international markets, right?” you ask him. Changbin doesn’t look back to you, as he really does not care all too much for what you’re saying, and instead continues looking forward and planning on what game he’ll be beating Jisung at this evening. “I’m new and I guess… everything has been kinda messed up for me so far. I never end up in the right place.”

Changbin hums, nodding quietly again. “Yeah, it is.”

“Okay,” you answer, smile on your lips. You seem to ignore his blatant lack of interest which surprises Changbin a little. He pulls the disinterested card on girls and usually they beg for his attention and make it known that they’re not happy which how he’s treating them.

You, on the other hand, don’t even bat an eyelid.

That’s the thing which surprises him the most, especially since his cold and unattentive personality would usually have a girl angry at him for not trying too much with them, or have them rolling their eyes and vowing never to speak with him again.

He spends far too much of the lecture watching you concentrate on the topic being taught from the corner of his eye, your face burnt into his memory whether he wants it or not. Primarily he would have hoped at some point you’d have noticed his gaze shifting your way every so often, but when you don’t acknowledge him until you’re asking him politely to move out of your way so you can get to your next class, Changbin decides that he’s not going to let you bother his thoughts again.

Except he does let it bother him, a little too much if he’s honest.

It’s easy to shake you from his mind each time he stares at a blank wall or zones out from Jisung speaking with him about something he doesn’t care all that much for. It’s not so easy when you force your actual presence into his space a few days later at his seminar for International Trade later that week.

You sit beside him at the back, which again was usually a row he sat in on his own, but don’t pay too much attention to him since you were busy texting someone and didn’t notice him in the corner.

At least he thought that, since you didn’t even look in his direction until the teacher had everyone talking for a reason Changbin didn’t know - since he was busy on Instagram (trying to find your profile, for science of course).

“Hey,” you say, turning to him and catching his attention. He panics a little, eyes wide as he locks his phone and places it face down just in case you saw him searching through group followers to find anyone who resembled you. “I saw you in the lecture on international markets.”

Changbin finds your way of speaking with him a little unusual. You remind him ever so slightly of Jisung. Forward, but friendly, and somewhat good intentions. “Yeah, that was me.”

“I’m (Y/N), by the way.”

“Great,” Changbin replies. He may have come across as more rude than he intended to be, though he wanted to make it less obvious he had been waiting for your name this entire time. Pretty, he thinks, and it suits you. He panics, again, and tries to recover himself in possibly the worst way possible, “do you need something?”

“We need to work in pairs for the project on trade policies. I was wondering if you wanted to work together?” you ask.

Damn, he had hoped for more than that.

“Oh. Right.” Changbin’s quota for smiling had already been filled up since Chan slipped in the kitchen this morning when he dropped his milk everywhere. He might have been able to give a little more happiness if you asked him for more than just uni work. Well, saying that, you wanted to spend some time with him so you must have liked him in some shape or form. “Sure. We can work together.”

Changbin responds to your smile with his own tiny one which he spares for you from the bottom of his heart. He regrets it when he realises you probably just sat with him because you remembered him and didn’t know anyone else, but he notices there are quite a few empty seats around the room that you could have sat in should you want to make some other friends.

So he takes it as a win, even if you did probably enjoy the familiar aspect of having Changbin around you. Oh well. His ego will take it the other way until he’s ready to accept he’s lonelier than ever and anyone is better company than Jisung at this point. No offence to Jisung, he was just going through a… phase.

“I’m Changbin, by the way.”

Giving you his name goes a long way to creating a relationship between the two of you, since you exchange numbers pretty soon after and Changbin walks home with a less blank than usual look on his face. When he gets home he lingers in the living room for longer than usual and even Chan asks him what’s made him so happy.

He could have been happier if it didn’t take you two days to actually ask text him. Sure, he could have texted first, but didn’t want to overstep a boundary you might have wanted to keep. He could message you but you knew what the project was about and he would have probably cleared his schedule for you anyway, so he waits patiently for you to come to him.

Maybe to restore that mindset that people wanted him, or maybe because he was nervous. The latter was pretty much impossible.

Providing that Changbin’s (pretty much) squeak when he sees you’ve finally text him after all this time.

You: Are you free tonight? Changbin: Yeah You: Okay, do you want to go to the library? We can meet there and work on the research? Changbin: It would be easier if you came to me. I’ll send you my address.

Changbin’s parents were always apprehensive about him giving out his address, hence why he went elsewhere for parties and avoided having people back here. He asked Chan and Jisung to live with him with a pretty cheap rent for the company of having them around, and so far they were the only ones he had ever actively asked to be at his.

This was a different story, however. He trusted you enough to give you an address that his parents specifically wanted on the downlow (they didn’t want anyone to take advantage of Changbin’s wealth, and you didn’t seem like the type to do that). The first one ever. Changbin was really firsts with you already.

It brings butterflies to his stomach, almost as many as when two minutes later he realises his room is a mess and he does his best to tidy everything in the twenty minutes he probably has before you arrive, if you lived where he suspected you did.

He was just about right - nineteen minutes after he started cleaning and making sure his washing was (less than neatly) placed in his washing bin, you’re knocking at his front door and he’s running out of his room begging that no one else heard the door and opens it for him.

Lest be it that Jisung or Chan caught wind of him inviting you here; Changbin would never hear the end of it.

Changbin, slightly out of breath from mad-pace cleaning and running at full speed to get the door, forgets the smile he promised himself he’d give you, instead staring blankly at you and letting you walk in. To his surprise, you ignore a greeting too and walk inside, looking around the room at the barely covered walls (apart from the mirror Jisung took pictures in, and a shelf for Chan’s books). “Your place is… Nice.”

“Yeah, nice,” Changbin replies, clearing his throat as he shuts the door. He’s usually so talkative, what is about you that stops him from being able to form coherent sentences? Changbin isn’t sure. He stumbles over some more words as he follows you in staring down everything he jointly owned. “It’s uh… let’s do some work in my room. My friends will only cause problems if we’re in here.”

You nod, walking after him as he leads you to his room on the back at the right. He shuts the door behind the two of you, weary that Jisung would be able to hear your voice and come to inspect all that was going on.

Changbin watches as you sit on his floor, beside his desk, leaving the chair open for him. Not wanting to be a dick, he sits opposite to you and copies your stance in the hopes you won’t feel awkward being in a new environment. Changbin will learn that one of the things he loves about you is that you never seemed to be bothered by things like that.

He’s busy watching you log into your laptop, so your voice catches him by surprise. “I was actually looking into some studies yesterday so we can use that as a starting point. Unless you want to start over, and we take a different approach?”

“You already did some work, so you clearly know what you’re doing.” Changbin likes that you’re smart, too. He reveals in the fact you’re not just there for him because of his money, or because he can music,or even because you thought he was cute. You’re there for work and he respects that. “Just let me know what you need doing and I’ll help.”

He respects it to the degree that he can, anyway, since he didn’t particularly like doing the work and also felt bad when you sat there and did absolutely everything on the project whilst he just admired your pretty eyelashes and soft lips and… That’s for another day.

He sees you a few nights of the week, and somehow he manages to avoid both Chan and Jisung the entire time. It’s for your sake more than his, the pair of them were both on the get Changbin a girlfriend bandwagon and it annoyed the shit out of him.

Which is why he panics when he knows that Chan and Jisung are going to be at home and you’re most likely going to see them.

“Can I come over today?”

“That’s forward. Why?” Changbin asks, surprised by your presence directly next to him in the lecture hall. You usually left at least one seat between the two of you, but given your panicked voice, you were trying to cozy up to him for a reason he already knew the answer to.

Maybe he’s acting like this because part of him really just wants you to ask to come over so you can both spend time together without the underpinning task of your joint project. Yeah, Changbin hopes that you see more to him than just work.

Judging from your deadpan look, that is not the case. “For the project. It’s due soon and we’ve barely done anything.”

“Because it’s not that deep.” Changbin replies, shrugging as he returns to his notepad and writes the date in the top left corner. “If we fail, we fail. They’ll pass us anyway because if they fail us they look bad on rankings. Why bother?”

You don’t react to his words. Changbin should try a different approach to get some emotion from you, and the right emotion at that. “So we can get a good grade.”

“That’s not important to me. I don’t even wanna be in that class,” Changbin tells you.

“But I do, and I want to do well. So please, Changbin, just put a bit of effort in for me? I won’t bother you after this project, I won’t even talk to you, just help me get a good grade and it’s done. We won’t work together again.”

Ouch.

That hurt Changbin more than it was meant to, or at least more than he should have allowed it to. He sits in silence the rest of the lecture, checking on you every so often out of the corner of his eye, though not bothering to distract you from your work any more than he already had.

Part of him thinks that he should have stopped you before you left the lecture hall to apologise, but unfortunately for him his mind doesn’t work that quickly and he’s not sure how to make it up to you straight away.

He’s not even sure why he’s so bothered. You don’t mean that much time him, you’re just his partner for a university project and you probably won’t speak to him again afterwards.

Except he hoped you did speak to him afterwards, and he hoped you saw a friendship like he did, because it’s not often that Changbin has someone on his mind so much.

He didn’t want to sound like a stalker or anything. He wasn’t going to follow you around, he wasn’t going to make sure you were the only person he was talking to (since he was pretty sure you had your own group of friends which included one of Chan’s other friends, Felix), but he couldn’t help but wonder what you were up to at different times, or if you were thinking about him too.

God, it was like you were a drug he caught wind of and now he’s hooked to.

Which is why, the next day, he shows up at the library where he knows you’ll be (since you were always there on that day at that time, according to your snapchat), with the intention to apologise to you in a way that only Changbin can do.

It takes a while to find you, but when he does, he’s glad you’re on your own because he had a feeling that Felix boy had a thing for you given that he posts about you all the time and looks at you with massive heart eyes that Changbin wasn’t particularly in the mood for.

“Hey,” he says, sitting on the opposite side of the booth to you.

“Changbin?” You ask, raising a brow at him. You were clearly surprised to see him, too. Given his slight smile in your direction, you warm to the possibility of a conversation to him and pull out your earphones, abandoning the work you had in front of you. “Hey. Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, it’s fine.”

Changbin finds himself at a loss for what to actually say to you. On one hand, he could say sorry, but that doesn’t really mean anything unless he’s actually showing you that he’s sorry. He should invite you over, he should ask you to do something with him, he should offer to finish the project for you, he should--

“Do you need something?” you ask, cutting off his thoughts before they got too much for him.

“Oh, yeah. I do, actually.” Changbin clears his throat, leaning forward on his elbows, hands clasped together. He can make it genuine, because for you he is genuinely apologetic. “I’m sorry about before. I was an asshole to you for no reason. You want to do well and so should I. So, you can spend the weekend at mine and we can finish the whole project then, and do it well. I cleared my schedule.”

His apology works like a charm, actually.

Probably because he was genuine towards you, and you could see that. He stays with you for a little bit but leaves eventually, heart a little warmer and blood free from any emotion he didn’t want (ie animosity). His walk home is filled with ideas for what you can both do together, since he didn’t intend to have this project take up the entire weekend, and he settles for getting you to play video games with him and actually asking you for your social media so it’s acceptable for you to follow him on everything.

Having you around fills him with this emotion he couldn’t quite process (ie, not animosity, but something more like adulation) and it does strike him exactly like the strongest drug he could have ever purchased. One right at the bottom of the black market, with a selling price of well over what he could have ever afford.

The difference with an actual drug? The effects were permanent. So maybe you were like therapy for a blackened and closed heart.

“I’m so tired,” you say, laying on his floor with your eyes shut.

He hides his silent chuckle at your form and his pout because he can’t stroke your hair like his gut told him to. Is that what you do in a relationship? Likely so. He wasn’t entirely sure, but that’s what they do on Jisung’s dramas. “I literally just got us pizza.”

“I know, but I’m still tired,” you reply, opening your eyes and looking straight to him, “we can just get up early and work on this tomorrow.”

Changbin shakes his head at your suggestion, gesturing over to your laptop that now has a black screen since you haven’t touched it in roughly… forty minutes. “No, I don’t get up early. We’re finishing this tonight. We just need three more paragraphs and we are done.”

You don’t concur. Changbin looks down to his keyboard, attempting to finish his sentence, though he feels your eyes on him and is compelled to look back to you and see what you need. Just like a relationship.

“What?” Changbin asks, studying your pout like he’s never seen one before. Well, he has, but mostly because he was rejecting a girl who didn’t care all too much for him. “Why are you doing that?”

When he brings up your pouting, you stop and return to an emotionless stare. After a few moments of unbroken eye contact, you sit up and push the chair from your face adjusting your sleeves. “Let’s just take a break then okay?”

“A break?” Changbin repeats, one brow slightly raised. He couldn’t dream of saying no to you again, since last time he hurt your feelings and he wasn’t ready to do that again. He likes talking to you. You’re interesting, and you make him feel like he is too. Whatever feelings you have towards him, it’s most definitely mutual. “Okay, we’ll take a break. For five minutes.”

“Tell me more about you, Changbin.”

“What do you want to know?” Changbin replies, noticing how quick you jump on the opportunity to ask him something person. Did you can about him? It would seem to be that way. No one really wants to know about him. He didn’t even want to talk about him, either.

But for you, he’ll say everything.

“Anything. Everything. Tell me your life story. That will get my mind working again so we finish this and have tomorrow to do whatever we want,” you return.

Changbin assumes you’ve forgotten the whole not talking after the project is over, and he’s happier than he’d want to admit about it.

That’s almost a turning point in your relationship. Almost because it changes again, all thanks to him, but that marked the two of you actually being friends, and Changbin likes that more than he would care to admit, too.

And friendship for him is more than he could have ever thought to ask for.

He thought that he say Chan and Jisung a lot, but compared to you it was nothing. The nights he would spend on his own were suddenly filled with your presence and he actually enjoyed being around other people for once, in the nicest way. There was something about his mostly extroverted but potentially introverted persona that meant he enjoyed the loneliness in the slightest way.

Except now, he didn’t at all.

He’d invite you over whenever he could, make sure that he had you around him when you were able to. Though your days were reserved for your other friends, which did include Felix and his friends, you spend your evenings with Changbin doing both work and friend things.

He enjoyed both, much to his surprise, but it was probably because he enjoyed the way you told him about business things much more than his teachers. Did he ever mention he loved how smart you were? Because he does, so much.

He also loves that you’re so effortlessly his best friend, in every way that you can be.

“No, Changbin,” you say, pushing his hands away from you. He acts surprised by your defiance, not giving up on having you play like you had agreed. You, however, continue your protests with a  “stop it. Don’t make me say it again.”

“You started it! I’m sorry you’re a major pussy and can’t play horror games. We said we would take turns!”

“It’s not funny!” You look away from him with a pout, the very one he’s grown so fond of over the time he’s know you, and face the door. Hearing Chan and Jisung chanting at the TV over some football game that was on, probably wasn’t the best thing for the situation. “Your friends probably think I’m stupid. I screamed loud.”

“Wanna bet?” Changbin asks, challenging your words in the best way he knows how.

Because you haven’t actually met the double team of Christopher ‘Chan’ Bang and Han Jisung, and Changbin knows that people aren’t usually that easy to adapt to their friend’s other friends.

If you’re easy to warm up to them, then Changbin knows you’re going to be easy for him to get on well with in the future. Who knows, maybe he can extend his relationship with you and you can be more than friends? That’s on him though, since he’s sure you don’t actually have any feelings towards him and he’s going to respect that until he’s one hundred per cent sure that confessing you is the most appropriate thing to do.

So Changbin drags you out to his friends, despite your very basic protests, planting you straight in front of the TV and making sure to deal with Chan and Jisung’s eye rolls and complaints that they were interrupting whatever team was playing.

“Chan, Jisung. Do you think she’s stupid?” Changbin asks, his dominance in their friendship clear from how he approaches them. He looks between them, then to you, switching between the two until he gets the answer he’s looking for.

“Stupid?” Chan repeats, looking over to you. He shakes his head, careless to what Changbin’s actually intentions were here. “No, you were playing Outlast, weren’t you?”

Jisung, on the other hand, has the full intentions to make sure that Changbin regrets ever trying to impress you with his friends. The youngest has a smirk as he directs his comments at both of you, but mostly you. “Hyung, you were screaming louder than her, you’re the pussy.”

Honestly, Changbin didn’t know someone’s laugh could brighten his entire day.

But that’s normal right?

To want to make you laugh every day, to listen to it on reply, to have to you laughing at something he said (so that you’re laughing because of him)?

He’s not sure, maybe he’s got a delusional idea of what is right and what is wrong in his head. Either way, Changbin vows that your friendship will be good and you’ll enjoy every minute of it that you’re in it with him.

And that means that you’ll be doing everything with him, whether you like it or not.

Changbin hopes you do like it, though. He can’t keep wondering whether you will, so he decides one day when you’re both walking to class together that he should check. “Let’s do more stuff together.”

“More stuff?” you repeat, looking up to him questioningly. He nods, though you’re still not buying. “You literally leave the house for lectures and that’s it.”

“But you like doing stuff, so I’ll do it with you,” Changbin says, hoping to convince you with a little bit of affection.

That works well, too.

Changbin went from not being able to talk to you, struggling to know what to reply to you, and being as awkward as he ever could be around a person, to silently begging for you to want to spend more time with him.

And do you? Well, Changbin would wait for you to answer that. At first he thinks not, since you don’t approach him with anything, but when you spot him at the cafeteria in one of the business buildings, and you run after him with a wide smile, he changes his mind a little.

Skip the formalities, a greeting from you is a form of therapy within itself.

“There’s this thing.”

Changbin hums, looking to you as you both approach the elevator to go to your class on the third floor. “Right. This thing.”

“Can you come with me?” you ask, surprising him a little. He doesn’t frown, his eyes just widen a little. You must have noticed because you’re quick to try and convince him. “It won’t take up too much of your evening. I don’t want to go on my own.”

Oh, you must want him to come if you're convincing him.

“I don’t even know what it is you want me to come to,” Changbin returns, shrugging.

“It’s just a… poetry, thing.” Changbin thinks it’s cute, though keeps his look placid to make sure you’re not quick to read him. He worries, given that you’re basically an empath, you’ll catch onto the fact that his feelings are becoming a bit too prominent for him to control. “Boring, I know. I’ll make it up to you, but you might enjoy it. Who knows.”

He didn’t need to enjoy it to go along; Changbin was going to seize an opportunity to spend some time with you on your invitation again.

Since your presence was the drug he couldn’t kick from his system as of yet, or a therapy session he paid above and beyond for, and a poetry session with you was a strange way of getting a high, or help, he needed.

To imagine you each time they spoke of a starry sky, a roaring fire, even a firework that explodes in the sky, he would have paid a lot for that anyway.

And he got it for free.

Spending time with you was something Changbin would have given a lot up for. As it turns out, you liked it too, since you let him walk you home and even invited him in (politely asking him not to judge your place since you weren’t rich and student loans didn’t provide that much to an international student anyway). No, nothing happened, as much as anyone may have thought it did.

Changbin didn’t have the intentions to do something with you, and maybe you felt the same. He didn’t notice you didn’t have any pictures of you with any guys at home, or their clothes in your room, so maybe he did have a chance.

That was a weight off his shoulders, at the very least. You probably didn’t have a boyfriend, and he was moving more in that direction now.

“Hey,” Changbin says, distracting you for the lecturer at the front. You look over to him, since you both sit directly next to each other now, and nod for him to continue. “Are you free, later?”

You nod again. “All day, why?”

“Do you want to do something together?”

“Sure,” you return, bringing some relief to Changbin’s heart that was beating at about 200 miles an hour. He lets his cheeks twitch a little, but never does actually smile at you. You keep your voice down but still keep your interest at hand, “what do you have in mind?”

Changbin shrugs, passing his phone across the desk to you, since he had a film already opened that he thought would be cute to see with you. A horror movie, at that, but it was up his alley and yours too. “This movie came out recently and if you wanted to, we can see it together?”

It’s a terrifying three seconds waiting for you to answer. “I’d like that.”

So seeing a movie becomes your weekly thing together, alongside the things you already do. You really do end up spending every night with him, the bonus being that you also get along well with Jisung and Chan too, and the four of you somehow form a friendship that Changbin would never have been able to foresee in the past.

You were once someone he sat a few seats from in a lecture, and now you’re standing in his kitchen playing hot potato with a sponge that Jisung had used to mop up (quite a bit of) soy sauce from the side that he spilt. Given that Chan and Jisung had been throwing at each other, and then Jisung involved you, it was a given Changbin was going to get involved to.

“Hey Changbin,” you shout, the boy looking up to you with wide eyes as he leaves the bathroom, still drying his hands on his jeans, “think fast.”

Changbin’s heart is heavy because you remembered to include him, of course he very much enjoys your thoughts going straight to him, so he doesn’t get much time to react to a soy sauce soaked sponge launched directly at his chest. “Hey!”

“I said think fast!”

Chasing you into his bedroom is one way to get a girl in there, even if it’s because you know he works out and if threw that back at you, you would probably lose a rib because of the sheer force. Not that he would actually do that - he throws it back to Chan who looks at the two of you like you are a resident married couple.

No that you have to know that. “Get back here!”

Yeah, his bedroom. You have a lot of memories there. From getting to know him in there, and finally understanding what goes on in his deep, dark mind, all the way to watching horror movies together and eventually sleeping in his bed together.

On your demand that is. You think Changbin has it in him to ask if you want to stay over? The poor boy could barely get out 4 words about his feelings, yet alone ask you something like sleep in my bed or even just stay over, and he would stay on the couch.

“Your bed is so comfortable.” Your words, like always, catch him off guard. He was working on a song with both Jisung and Chan, and he had the lucky job of producing the final product. “Let me sleep here.”

Changbin avoids having another internal meltdown and deals with this by not actually dealing with it at all. He nods, noticing that you’re pretty comfortable already. “Okay.”

“Okay,” you repeat, slightly questioning his response. Did you expect him to say yes? Probably not. Changbin gave you the impression he liked his personal space. Luckily he knew he would be pretty boring tonight and would be up to the early hours of the morning, so letting you sleep meant he could get on with the song without the recurring thought of you. “I bet girls ask you to do this all the time.”

“Sure,” Changbin answers. You weren’t wrong, they used to, but he hadn’t even spoken to another girl since… you came into his life.

He has all of about ten minutes of actual music time before he realises you’re already asleep, tucked away in the corner of his bed under the black blanket he usually didn’t use because it got to hot.

You’re cute when you sleep. Changbin can’t help the warm feeling that spreads over him as he admires you from the other side of the room, smiling to himself as he tries his very best to get on with the song he wanted to.

He does have to stop a few times to look back at you, check you were okay and we’re too cold (or too hot, for that matter), but he finishes what he wanted to around 4am and practically collapses in the bed beside you without even considering whether he should have slept on the floor instead.

His eyes were too heavy and mind clouded by music to even consider that you were nothing but his friend and the few inches of space between the two of you was easily filled if one of you moved.

If both of you moved, well… it would mean you ended up with your head on his shoulder, his arm around you and resting on your waist.

“Sorry,” you say softly, lifting your body when you realise what position you’re in. Changbin was an active participant in that too, but you probably didn’t realise. It will forever remain a mystery which one of you initiated the (kind of) cuddling. “I didn’t mean to…”

Changbin shakes his head, pulling you back down to where you were before when he sees the numbers 07 on his clock at the end of his bed. He’s too tired to notice you place your arm over his chest, and he’s practically sleeping again when he mumbles to you that he’s okay with it. “It’s fine. I didn’t say anything.”

That’s practically where your relationship starts to change. Not that you both confessed your feelings to one another when you woke up later, but there was a definite shift in the dynamic between the two of you.

Things continue as normal, with a hint of a romantic feeling between the two of you, though neither of you address it. Changbin’s content with where you both are, even if he realises that he does get jealous of you and Felix, you and whoever isn’t him, because he most definitely has feelings towards you which reflect that of a boyfriend.

A boyfriend you already had, mind you.

“Do you remember when I got mad at you about the project?”

“Mhm.” Changbin was busy eating his noodles and didn’t pick up on the signs you were showing him. He tries to make a joke, since when he looks up you look a little sad. It was just the downturned lips and sparkly eyes. Glassy. Changbin means glassy. “You told me that you wouldn’t talk to me again.”

You hum, facing the table for a little longer than usual. “I was a bitch ‘cause my boyfriend and I broke up.”

“I didn’t know you had a boyfriend,” Changbin replies honestly. He should have expected it. You both hadn’t know each other that long then, and you already had broken up with your boyfriend? It surprises him. It angers him that someone hadn’t appreciated you enough to love you.

“Hwang Hyunjin?” His name burns some hatred into Changbin. That asshole? Yeah, everyone know who Hyunjin was. He didn’t realise you two dated, and he would have warned against it if he did know, even though you both weren’t that close. “Yeah, I should have realised that was going to end up that way.”

Of course Changbin reports this information back to Jisung (and Chan, since he was there) since the youngest had been the first to realise that Changbin was, you know, in love with you.

Even before Changbin. That little asshole figured it all from the silence of his own bedroom. Is it weird that he was listening through the walls to figure out just how his hyung felt towards the pretty girl who kept coming over. Then he shared it with Chan, who also had his suspicions, but kept it quiet.

“He said he didn’t love her,” Jisung retells a tale he heard from one of his other friends who knew Hyunjin from some society, Woojin. “What a dick.”

“You should tell her how you feel,” Chan interjects, seeing an opportunity for things to be made better.

Changbin, however, does not see things the same way. It’s probably his fear for the situation, a genuine worry that anyone who loves another has when it comes to confessing. “What if it makes things worse?”

“No, it won’t,” Jisung states, taking a bite from his apple.

“You sound sure.”

Jisung nods at Changbin’s words, finishing his bite before talking. The youngest, like most of the youngest in friendship groups, sees himself as a bit of a prodigy in relationships. Didn’t Changbin write the love songs? He did. Jisung nods again before confirming. “‘Cause I’m right.”

Changbin hopes Jisung’s right, too.

He’s a nervous wreck the entire day he plans to tell you how he feels.

Probably the fear of rejection, no matter how much Jisung told him that he wouldn’t be rejected. He asked to meet you at 1pm and he shows up twenty minutes early, expecting to be alone, but sees you sitting at the able you both claimed as your own in the cafe near to uni.

He panics briefly, walking away with his head hung low, though stops himself and walks back to you when he remembers that he’s doing this for more than just his own state of mind.

It’s so that you know not everyone is like Hwang Hyunjin, and you can have someone love you.

“Can we talk?” Changbin says, stopping beside the table with wide eyes.

“About what?” You look up to him and frown at his expression. Though you gesture of the seat opposite to you, Changbin takes a few moments to actually sit down. He’s surprised you already bought him coffee, and it’s exactly how he likes it too. “You’re the second person today who looks like they’re going to pass out on me. Seriously, are you okay, Changbin?”

“I’m fine,” Changbin answers.

The coffee is hot and burns his tongue a little. He tries his best not to react, staring at you with the most affection he can actually process. It’s for the best to tell you, and it won’t change things drastically. If you wanted to reject him, you wouldn’t have returned some of his signals. Whatever they were. Jisung was convinced they were there.

Fuck it. Changbin places his hands flat on the table when he realises that he needs to just say it rather than keep it as a thought in his mind.“I needed to admit to you that… I’ve seen you differently, recently.”

“Differently?”

You were clearly both on different wavelengths.

“I think I love you.”

“Love me?”

“Well, I didn’t think it was love but then I was thinking more about it and I realised that every time I’m with you, it’s like the sun has a single beam that is shining right down on me and I literally just want to stare at you and listen to you laugh and watch you smile because you are the very definition of what makes me happy and it’s hard for me to explain because I know how much you doubt yourself and you will never see yourself the way that I see you, but… I do love you, and there’s nothing in this world that I could want more than showing you that.”

Changbin could put that in a love song.

He’s breath is a little shaky as you look back at him without an answer. He doesn’t particularly need one, lest it be for you to admit that you do actually feel the same way towards him. He stops thinking about it, like he should have a long time ago, and asks you what he’s wanted to since you slept in his arms and you laughed at his jokes and you showed an interest in him that no one else ever had.

“So please, for the sake of my own sanity, will you be my girlfriend and let me show you the love that no one else has?”

He’s sure that no matter what answer you give to him, he’ll always love you anyway.

For you were the one that showed him what it’s like to have a different perspective on life, too.

You didn’t see yourself the way he saw you, but it was the same vice versa. The very definition for happiness in your own personal dictionary always had his name written down in it. Seo Changbin, the one who could love you back.

The song that never leaves your memory.

The key to a lock that was never opened before.

Saying no wasn’t an option.

You were a rainbow, and Changbin had been waiting for you the entire storm.

[who-is-olivia]

Track 5. Sweet Creature

Harry Styles x OC

Harry comes home after Zayn leaves the band and makes plans for the future. [3.3k]

Genre: fluff

Warnings: nudity

May 2015

  After a tiring day of rehearsals, Olivia arrives home dropping her bags and coat on the way. It’s been a year since they finally moved in together – although Frank was a marvelous roommate, there’s only so many times your brother can catch you in the middle of the act. The new place is a vast studio, not huge just... roomy. It takes longer for her to crash over her bed, so long she actually takes a moment to turn the radiator on and undress to her knickers. She climbs the stairs to her bedroom and passes out over the bed, sighing in relief.

  She’s so exhausted she doesn’t even hear Harry arriving after three months touring. Frowning, he wonders if she’s still at rehearsals or maybe if she crashed at Frank’s, but then he feels that sour perfume in the room and he can trace it right to where she is. He pats his back pocket, fingers tapping over a velvet box lousily stored on his trousers as he sighs thankfully for it actually remaining there.

  Leaving the suitcases at the living room, Harry undresses a few layers – the radiator is a bit strong – and climbs the stairs find a half naked Olivia soundly asleep between the lilac sheets. He stops at the frame, his heart melting a bit at the sweet sight: the see-through blankets that cover her silhouette, her eyes closed shut with a smudge of makeup still there, her curly hair unbraided and natural contrasting against the pillows, small puffs of air escaping her slightly parted lips... he is tired but not tired enough that he can’t take a couple more minutes to admire her.

  Outside, the rain starts over again, reminding him to turn down the radiator a bit... on second thought, he leaves it be, recalling that the heat reminds her of home and makes her comfortable. He then silently pulls a chair to her bedside and sits leaning his chin over the heel of his palm, dumbstruck by her presence. He takes a mental note to never stay away that long again, even if they often video chat, it’s not the same. Watching her fall asleep is an opera on itself, specially when she begins to whisper sweet nothings into the pillow.

  Seeing her takes his mind away from all the drama he’s been dealing with. After Zayn left the band, he’s had few moments of peace to actually enjoy what he does. He misses him, he misses the times when the band didn’t fight over who gets his solo bits, who sings his high notes, how’s the next album going to sound, are they going forward without him? Zayn just needed a break and now so does Harry. Being able to be with Oli, actually live in their house and live their lives together does make him reconsider how long he can continue working like this.

  He can’t exactly tell how long after, but Harry can’t help himself anymore, he leans over and runs his knuckles gently over her temple, grazing down her cheekbone, her tiny hairs responding in softness under his skin when her eyelids flutter open and her pitch black irises find him.

“Haz...” she mutters with a smile.

“‘ello love” he whispers. Slowly, she sits up and pulls him into a tight embrace, his light blue t-shirt against her naked breasts as he pulls her over his lap. He eases against her skin, feeling her fingers twirl in his hair and her nose brushing against his soft cheeks. She nests her head on his broad shoulder and cup his jaw, inviting him to a sweet kiss. He snakes his arm around her waist, the other lacing her bare back until he can cup the back of her neck. Both hungry enough to devour one another but still loyal to their gentleness.

Olivia parts the kiss and sighs, leaning her lips against the tip of his nose. “You’re early”

“I know, just got a few weeks off... thought I might drop by to see you” he replies, taking a bit of distance to look at her face, dozy eyes struggling not to doze off.

“I was just dreaming about you and then you popped out of nowhere, this is absolutely amazing” she leans her forehead against his with a silly smile.  

“Was it a nice dream?” she nods, biting her bottom lip. “Any sexy ones?”

“Those are just mine and I don’t share” he snorts, making her laugh in his embrace.

“Right... I need to eat something, I’ll be right back-“

“No... come on, stay here” she pleads lazily, making his heart melt.

“I’m starving love”

“What if I get some snacks, and a bit of wine”

He scrunches his nose, “Don’t feel like drinking”

“Some tea?”

“Tea will do” he kisses her temple helping her out of the bed.

“Let me just dress up-“

“I think you look just perfect like that”

“Bet the neighbors do too” she mocks, “who told you to get a flat with a big ass window?”

“Ugh... fair enough”

  He leaves his shoes on the closet and goes down the stairs to make room for their meal. Despite the storm outside, there’s a spot in their garden under a tent and that’s where he’ll set the table. Oli hops down the stairs in leggings and sweater then gets all the necessary snacks to entertain them – along with the tea.

“This is different” he notices after sipping on the beverage.

“It’s from Rio, you boil with a bit of lemon. I usually take it with ice but this is good too” she replies, cuddling up in her chair. Harry pulls both of her feet to his lap and rubs their socks. Years living abroad and she still doesn’t know how to protect from the cold.

“Very good”

She hesitates a bit, watching his allusive eyes for a while before starting. “How’ve you been, Haz? I know everybody is asking that but-“

“It’s alright, love... It’s been rough, we all saw it coming but it still hurts. Sometimes I hate him for it, sometimes I get a bit jealous”

“Jealous?”

“Yeah... he’ll get to spend some time with his family, with Perrie, get some time to rest and not work like crazy 24/7” he explains, picking some toast from the table “The other day I got a call from Mike, that friend of mine from Cheshire, and he’s dropping out of college to go on some crazy religious trip to South America. I wish I could do that, and I travel the world for a living”

“We’re still young, even if we work hard now there’ still time to do all that” she comforts him, “but if you don’t feel like the band is still working for you... I’ve got your back”

“Thanks love” he kisses the back of her hand and keeps hold of it gently. “How’s everything going here?”

“Alright, I think. Frank and I are still rehearsing for the tour, we got small venues in a few cities but I prefer it this way. We actually got to follow your tour dates, so you won’t get rid of me so easily” she pokes him with her toes.

“Oh, for fuck’s sake” he mocks in fake annoyance, trying to hold her feet. “Just when I thought I’d have some peace of mind”

“Shut up!” she tries to hit him but he holds her wrists and pulls her closer, hopping from her chairs to his in a tiny fist fight. He keeps her fists on his and pull her to a heated kiss, blowing off all that desire that built up over months of distance. Even though it starts in a hurry it eventually turns into tiny pecks and little strokes. She laces her arms around his neck and nuzzles that spot behind his ear breathing in the perfume of his hair. Feeling that, her heart calms down, this is where she belongs. “I missed you so much”

“I missed you too” he smiles in her embrace. It always baffled him how she could be so heated and so loving at the same time, she’s his favorite paradox.

A rush of wind wavers the tent and their whole table gets under the rain. “Shit!”

“That’s just neat” he laughs, helping her up so they can fix the tent. They eventually stabilize it but they get wet anyway. Noticing she’s a bit more dry, Harry rushes to hug her.

“Don’t you fucking-“ she squeals and runs through the garden, getting lost in the rain. She tries to lose him around a vase but he almost takes hold of her, so she keeps running in circles. It’s such a silly thing but it still gets her blood pumping in a delightful way. He eventually gets her and spins her in the air in a fit of laughter, “Put me down! No-no-no, my lemon tree!”

“Alright, I’ll save the lemons” he puts her down, her face dripping wet from the rain.

“Why did you do that, it’s too cold”

“No it’s not, you were in a fucking burner in there”

“I’m not a cold person!”

He chuckles, hugging her waist. “Definitely not”

“You know what? I’m going inside and I’ll make myself a nice warm bubble bath and if you behave you may join” she fixes his long wet hair out of his face.

“Lovely” he kisses her temple, letting her make her way to the bathroom.

  Harry takes their cutlery to the kitchen and attempts to dry himself with a washcloth before walking to his his living room idly hearing the sound of running water from a distance. Although they both split the expenses evenly, he’s barely been in the place since he moved in. He’s always touring and when he’s not they both travel around on vacations, so she basically owns the place. He remembers the last day of moving things, Oli led her brother out after helping with the boxes while he set a small blanket on the ground and waited. When she came back, he undressed her slowly and made love to her between chairs and lamps and shoes, just to make sure that place had something special to it. He thought it would be weird to come home to somewhere he’s barely slept a night in, but soon he found out the place didn’t mean a thing. It was her, living with her, she is his home wherever they go.

  In her absence, he smiles as he notices small traces of her around the house that make it so undeniably hers. The shoes by the door, a small lace piece over the dining table, the mass of paper sheets over the piano, the blanket over the sofa. It looks hers but it also feels so much his...

Suddenly he feels her arms surrounding his waist and he grins, holding them earnestly. “Hope I’m not intruding in your affair with the living room” he chuckles, “but the bath is ready”

  Oli walks in first, soaking in the bubbly bath and washing her wet hair. Harry takes a peak at her through the mirror and turns.

“What?” she bats her eyelashes innocently.

“Looking good, really inviting”

“Then stop talking and get in”  

  She watches him strip out of his shirt and shoes normally, but when he pulls down his trousers, a small velvet box falls on a white rug.

She freezes.

“Harry...”

He looks down to where her gaze has fallen. “Oh, it’s for you”

“Is that what I think it is?”

Only then does he assess the situation. “Oh... no, probably not” he ditches the jeans and picks up the box, crouching beside the tub and revealing a pair of pearl earrings. “I saw it at the airport, though you might like it”

  After every tour he brings her many small gifts, this time he wanted something truly remarkable – to celebrate their next big step, which is living together – so, as he had time to spare on an airport connection, he decided to give her a nice pair of pearl earrings from Cartier. He loves the way she blushes when he gifts her expensive things, no money in the world could possibly afford that shade so dear to him. Sadly, he can’t see that particular shade now.

  Her face is blank.

“They’re lovely”

“You don’t like it” he puts down the box without even giving her a chance to take it, rather putting himself in front of her.

“No! I love it Haz, I swear!” she pecks his lips quickly and he breaks his disappointed facade, “I just thought it was something else”

“You thought it was a ring?”

“Well, yeah”

  Harry doesn’t know what to say, instead he tries to read her pitch black eyes in search of what she truly feels about it. They never addressed marriage, Olivia never though about it but the sheer possibility for a moment excited her. Now she doesn’t know how to feel about it.

“I... sorry Oli, I didn’t think about that when they picked the box”

“I know” desperate to end the subject, she tugs on his hand. “Why don’t you get in before it gets cold?”

“That’s bloody impossible, it’s fucking hot outside” he mocks and she leaves all the tension behind, making room for him to sit comfortably behind her and pull her bare back against her chest.

“You can always turn the radiator down” she argues as she snuggles against him, holding his hand and inspecting it for a moment, bringing his knuckles to meet her lips and nipping on them playfully before kissing them earnestly.

“I know, but sometimes I like to think you wake up in your natural habitat”

“Are you implying I’m a motherfucking lizard?” he laughs in denial.

  For a while they don’t say nothing, just relax and soak in the essential oils she dispersed on the tub. Harry’s fingers trace her collarbone gently, as if they touch pure marble. They follow a straight line then dip on the middle before following its path to the end of her shoulder, where he lays tender little kisses. As she rests her head to the side, his nose follows the path of her jugular up to her ear lobe until he finds that one sweet spot that causes her to smile. He tries to ease her and himself into a relaxing trance, but inside he’s still in turmoil.

“Oli...”

“Hm?”

“If it was a ring... would you say yes?”

Her eyes lazily open as she finds herself staring at the tip of her toes, thinking about it. “I think I would, but I don’t think we need to get married... I mean, we already live like married people, we just don’t shove a ring on people’s faces”

“... but would you like that’?”

She chuckles, palming the outside of his thigh and running her hand over the length of it. “I won’t lie, it sounds kinda nice”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, I mean... I like to think it’s like a statement you make, you know? It’s like you’re telling everyone that you enjoy someone so much you’re willing to keep their company for the rest of your life” she lets the words echo through the bathroom.

“That sounds like us” he smiles, nuzzling the shell of her ear.

“Right?!”

He chuckles. “Right”

“How do you feel about it?” she turns in his embrace to face him and watch his dimples wavering.

“I feel like... we’ve been doing this for four years and I could do this literally forever. And hm... it’s so silly but” he scrunches his nose, “just calling you my girlfriend... it’s too little to say how I feel about you”

She raises a brow, smugly. “Oh, is it?”

“Stop it!” her laughter echoes through the bathroom.

“-and how do you feel about me?”

He’s though about it before and written so many verses about it, but now that she is here, asking such an unpretentious question, he’s speechless... although, it takes one dip in her pitch black orbs to figure it out. “I feel like... you’re really making me do this?”

“You started it!”

“I know, but it’s hard to put into words” he tantrums like a 5-year-old.

“Just try”

“Ugh... it’s so normal to me, like-” he strokes her arm, elbow to shoulder blades, trying to say it, “You’re the first thing I think about it the morning and the last thing I think about before I go to sleep. Everything I do I do thinking of you and how I can make this better. I’m not saying you’re perfect, you know it’s hard when we argue-“

“Just ‘cause your a stubborn asshole”

“Thanks love, I’m here opening my heart to you-“

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry! Please, carry on”

He chuckles, “I don’t know what else to say... I just think, wherever I go, you bring me home” he punctuates that large smile turning into an endearing dimply smirk as he realizes how sure he is of those words, how much he means them.

She takes a while to answer, taking in his words as if she’s slowly sinking into warm water. Then she meets his gaze again, and a small choked smile surfaces. “I think that’s the way you talk about your wife, not your girlfriend”

  He leans to kiss her but she holds a hand before his grinning lips stubbornly. She runs her thumb over his bottom lip, tugging it to the side before letting go of the rosy piece of skin. He goes for it again, her parted lips smugly flee before pressing against his on her own accord. It drags for a long time before she bumps her nose on his, deepening the kiss. Harry encircles her waist, pulling her even closer to the point he can feel every inch of her warm skin against his own, his heart beats so fast he feels like a teenager, reacting exaggeratedly to her every tease. His love is so intense in that moment it could materialize itself in the air they breathe together. There’s a moment during the kiss when she sighs quietly and the sound of it rings through his ears echoing endlessly.

  At that moment, he knows there’s no going back.

She breaks the kiss for a moment, his lips instinctively reach for hers. “You know what?”

“Hm?”

“I don’t have a single reason not to marry you” her words drip like mellow out of her mouth as she runs her lips against the column of his neck, pecking on it delicately, the sound of her contact echoing through the bathroom.

Harry’s head falls back against the wall, humming as her heavenly sweet kisses grace his Adam’s apple. Then she runs her lips over to his chin, taking in the smooth skin before returning to his mouth, but before she can taste him, he mutters: “Marry me”

She smiles against his skin, shifting on the tub. She uses his shoulders as support, moving her knees so she can straddle his thighs. From that position, she looks down on him. “Just like that?”

“Uhum”

“No ring?”

“Nope”

“ No speech? No ugly cry?” he giggles.

“I just did a heartfelt speech, what else do you want?” Harry asks mockingly, reaching towards her cheek and cupping her lovely face.

She chuckles over her own tantrum, shaking her head negatively as she nuzzles the palm of his hand, depositing a chaste kiss on it. When she looks back at him, there’s a light red rim around her eyes, shining over her crinkly smile “I just want you”

  And the way she looked at him at that moment is still the sweetest sight he’s ever seen.

<< Previous | Next >>

Masterlist

[leejihoonownsmyheart]

Click, Click

Chapters: 1, 2, 3, 4 

Chapter Five:

Your classes this semester weren’t as hard as you had worried they would be. Luckily despite them all being in Korea you didn’t take any of your classes entirely in Korean, except for the course that helped you understand the local language. When you were at school you were surrounded by a ton of people that were your age and were all from other countries as well. There were only fifteen of you guys, but you all got along pretty well.

Unluckily for you, they had all heard about your run in with Seventeen, because they were pretty much all Kpop fans. They too were all wondering what you had done to deserve that attention from the boys.

What is Vernon like? Why did they comment on your post? Are you two really dating?

There was so much you wanted to say. So much you wanted to ask but so much that you couldn’t. Instead, you nervously smiled and responded that you supposed you were just lucky.

That had to be it. You must just be really lucky.

“We need to get some groceries,” Caitlin murmured as she looked through her phone. You glanced at her.

“We should swing by the store then,” you replied, putting your notebook into your backpack.

It had been about a week and a half since you last saw Jihoon. Your classes were a ten-minute walk away from Seventeen’s dorm. Your apartment was in the direction of Seventeen’s dorm from your classes. The grocery store you were going to was twenty minutes away from Seventeen’s dorm.

You hated it. You hated how you kept track of everywhere you went based on these measurements now.

You wanted to go by every day. You wondered if you did if one day you would see Jihoon there.

They were promoting their album. They were busy but you were selfish, you wanted to see him again. You wished you could see him again, you had so many questions you still needed to ask.

“Can we get a lot of snacks?” You asked. “Our budget is pretty good, right? I swear, recently all I want to do is eat.”

Julia laughed.

“Oh, we’ve noticed. I’m sure we can afford some… You’re getting a job soon right?”

You nodded.

You had applied for a job at a convenience store. It wasn’t that you needed to work while you were here. You were all well off and had saved a lot of money up for this trip but without having to work every week… Well, you were getting antsy. You had too much free time on your hands.

You really liked to be busy. Even though you generally got too busy and became very stressed you found that in the end, you were happiest when you had a lot on your plate. It made you feel productive when maybe somedays you weren’t really.

You had of course gotten the job. You started in a week, and you were excited to get back into customer service. You missed the customer interactions. You missed getting paid. You missed having coworkers. You missed doing more than just sitting around your room all day.

“You know, maybe while we are there we’ll see some idols,” you joked, a large smile crossing your face. “Jeon Jungkook oppa, where are you?”

Caitlin’s face reddened and she smacked your shoulder.

“Shut up, you’re one to talk Mrs. Lee Jihoon,” she cooed back. You rolled your eyes.

“Don’t be ridiculous, if anything he’s just humoring a fan.”

Even as you wrote off the situation a large smile was spread across your face. You couldn’t help but notice that recently you had been feeling a lot happier. Maybe it was because you were finally getting over your anxieties here in Korea. Maybe it was because you had blocked your dad who had been giving you so much anxiety in the first place. Making you feel bad for striving for the opportunity to study abroad. Maybe it was just that you were finally away from all of those people who made you feel especially worthless all the time. You had been told countless times that you couldn’t come to Korea. It would be too hard for you. You wouldn’t be able to afford it. You wouldn’t survive so far from your parents.

That had made you want to come even more. It had also made you that much more nervous when you arrived.

“Soju!” Caitlin sang, rushing over to the shelves with the alcohol. You laughed and rolled your eyes politely.

“You have a one-track mind. I’m going to go grab the toilet paper,” you said. You walked away from your friends and began to explore the aisles for what you were looking for. In one of the aisles, you noticed a taller guy with a face mask on. Your initial impression was that you should go into another aisle. Even all the way here in Korea you were nervous to be in an aisle with other people. You didn’t like to get in other people's way and preferred to just go into empty grocery store aisle but this one was the one that the toilet paper was in and you were trying to be less of a pushover, so you took a deep breath and walked down the aisle. The person glanced up at you, and you gave him a short smile.

He had a ball cap on so you couldn’t see him very well but… Well, he resembled…

You shook the thought out of your head and browsed the paper products, trying to figure out which one you should get. You looked to see which products were the most expensive and tried to recall the brand you guys had gotten last time.

“We always buy that.”

You startled and looked to your left. The guy was standing next to you, pointing at one of the more averagely priced packs.

“Oh um-”

“You’re her right? The one that ran into Vernon and Woozi and Seungkwan the other day?”

You squinted at him silently for a moment. From this angle, you could see his face better. You could make out the shape of the bags of his eyes like little crescent moons turned upwards.

“Seungcheol,” you breathed in surprise. You instinctively ducked your head into a deep bow, murmuring a polite hello to the boy. “What are the odds.”

“We shop here a lot,” Seungcheol responded. He smiled at you. “So it’s not that odd.”

“Are you shopping for everyone?” You asked him, pushing your hands into your back pockets. God, what did you even say to an idol when you ran into them on the street? There wasn’t really any protocol to this. You didn’t want to give him a bad impression of yourself.

“Yeah, I have to grab snacks for the others. We had a long practice today.”

“Oh, maybe you can tell me what’s good? I’ve been wanting to get myself some snacks,” you replied. You couldn’t tell for sure because he was wearing the facemask, but you could’ve sworn that Seungcheol smiled at that.

“You snack a lot?”

“I go through phases. Last year I swear all I did was get up in the middle of the night to eat snacks,” you admitted with a shy laugh. You picked up a pack of toilet paper and followed Seungcheol through the grocery store.

“Jihoon is the same way,” Seungcheol replied. “You know one time at two in the morning he woke up five members just to eat with him.”

You couldn’t help it- you laughed. For some reason, Jihoon didn’t seem like the type to eat snacks in the middle of the night. You had always assumed people would judge you for doing just that, and you had tried to get away from it when you moved into the apartments with your friends. You liked to snack on things like chips and hated to be loud. Back when you lived in dorms you had gotten into the habit of going out into the hall just to eat a bag of chips.

“That’s very…” you trailed off, reluctant to use the word that you wanted to use to describe the behavior. “Very… cute…”

Seungcheol laughed again.

“Mhm,” he asserted. “He likes rice cake and cold noodles the best, but he’ll eat anything. You would be surprised by how much he eats.”

You smiled despite yourself. God, it was so cute to imagine Jihoon sitting up at night in the middle of working on a new song, snacking on some noodles while he thought over what he had created. There was a reason you had always liked him so much and this was one of those reasons. It was so easy for you to imagine him doing things. Imagine him being domestic.

You had never thought you wanted anything domestic in your life, but biasing Woozi had made you think that maybe you were more domestic then you had originally thought you were.

“Why are you telling me this?” You asked softly. Seungcheol took a bag off of the shelf and put it in your arms. You looked down at it and tilted your head.

It took you a moment to translate the hangul, but once you did you deducted they were called “Honey twists”.

“Woozi eats these when he wants something sweet,” Seungcheol explained. He piled more stuff into your arms. Packs of spicy ramen, and bags of other sorts of chips. He even put triangular kimbap in your arms. Each time you questioned the action he just said that Woozi liked that kind of snack. Eventually, you stopped questioning it.

You were glad to have your appetite back. You had never been the kind of person to starve yourself. Sometimes you went a while without eating because you didn’t have a lot of time to eat, so you had gotten yourself into the habit of eating almonds on busy days to keep your appetite down, but you were not an unhealthy eater.

Wanting to constantly snack all the time, while not entirely healthy was part of your character. You felt like you weren’t even in your own skin when you weren’t hungry at two in the morning.

“I should find my friends,” you said eventually. Seungcheol looked up from his shopping list, and you had to admit he looked a little bit disappointed that you were leaving him to complete his grocery store adventures on your own. “Hey! It’s not really my preference but I haven’t seen my friends in like twenty minutes and I can’t keep leaving them hanging for Seventeen members.”

Seungcheol chuckled.

“Alright, well, I’ll tell Jihoon you said hi.”

You opened your mouth, your face reddening a bit as you tried to insist that he didn’t need to do that but, before you could the older boy was buried back in the ways of his shopping list and the contents of his shopping cart. You smiled and rolled your eyes, starting to make your way away from him.

“Wait!” You turned around, puzzled by the sudden attention from Seungcheol. When you looked back at him, you were surprised to see that his phone was propped up in his hand.

Click, click.

You opened your mouth. Seungcheol responded to the unasked question with a nonchalant wave of his hand and walked away.

God, these boys really were frustrating.

-

Your first day at the convenience store should have been completely uneventful, except that it wasn’t.

You spent the time interacting politely with customers. Your manager had warned you that as a foreigner, people might treat you a little differently and assume that you didn’t know the language or your way around the shop very well.

That was a valid concern but it ended up not really being the case.

You were a good employee. You always had been. You weren’t perfect in social situations but the minute you clocked in it was like you were the most social person in the city. If you could tell a customer needed help you politely gave them assistance if they asked for it or not. You melted the cold expressions on the customer's faces by talking to them about the weather or The Boyz new song or telling them that you weren’t familiar with Korea but were enjoying it either way.

You had some customers suggest places that you should eat and others tell you that you just had to go to this festival in their daughters' college town not far from here. It melted your heart to get to know the locals and find that a smile really did go a long way in customer service.

After nearly six hours behind the counter and a long wave of chatty customers who genuinely didn’t have a care in the world, you deflated a bit, finally left alone in the small convenience store.

“Look at you, working even while across the seas from home.”

You jumped, surprised to find Jihoon standing at the counter, a fond expression on his face. You smiled in relief. It was just Jihoon.

“Are you stalking me?” You responded, squinting your eyes at the just shorter idol. “I swear the amount at which I see you is… It’s just uncanny.”

Jihoon chuckled.

“No, no, it really is just random chance,” he replied pleasantly. His expression solemned and he put a chocolate bar on the counter. You began to ring him up, unable to shake the feeling of him staring at you with a thoughtful look on his face.

You had been around a few guys who liked you in your time. Guys who had been very interested in just staring at you when they thought you didn’t notice. It was because you were so friendly that guys usually liked you. You came off as a bit of an airhead. A naive, thoughtless girl who constantly wore a smile and had no cares in the world. You were shy, but extroverted and didn’t leave a single person out of a group activity if you could help it and that was why people liked you.

On the exterior, you were practically see through. You didn’t really have problems, all you cared about was everyone else and how they were feeling.

You were cute and you were nice. You were overly nice to people who weren’t used to being treated well too. As such, the people who liked you really just saw that… Exterior. Even though they watched you they only saw that much of you. They generally thought you needed help with everything that you did, even the simple things, and they assumed that they could touch you whenever and they assumed that you were okay with everything that happened around you.

In truth, you were quite capable, you didn’t really like to be helped with things you could do yourself. If you wanted to make a bad decision like walk through the snow with bare feet you wanted to be lightly told off but you wanted people to just think it was funny. You didn’t want to be forcibly lifted off the ground. Friends or not… It freaked you out to be trapped in someone's arms like that.

When you were passionately talking about something that didn’t matter to most people you wanted to be heard. You didn’t want to be degradingly called cute and laughed into silence.

You wanted to be with someone who didn’t like you because they thought you could be the emotional support they needed because you needed emotional support too.

That’s why you had never dated anyone before.

And that was why you were surprised when the feeling of Jihoon staring at you didn’t make you wildly uncomfortable.

That look always made you uncomfortable. You always sat there and pretended like you didn’t notice, trying your damnest not to react strangely to the sudden attention until they finally looked away from you.

You turned your head to face him. Neither of you smiled, but neither of you was upset either.

“Why a job in customer service?” Jihoon asked you. “You could do anything. You’re just in college but you certainly aren’t unqualified.”

“I like customer service,” you responded. You rattled off his total in the middle of the transaction. He acknowledged it. “You know, one time at my old job this customer was talking to a new employee and the employee didn’t know how to ring up a bag of ice. My manager, James, came over and helped the employee through the transaction. He was apparently so patient and kind, that it made the customers day. I mean, that story always blows my mind. He wasn’t even doing anything for her really. It was the way he interacted with the employee that made her day.”

You slipped Jihoon his receipt.

“That’s why customer service. The littlest thing that I do can completely make somebodies day and if I get paid to make someone smile then it’s just that much more worth it… Do you want a bag?”

Jihoon shook his head and pointed at the candy bar.

“This is for you by the way,” he murmured. “It’s one of your favorites right?”

You stared at the bar blankly, your eyebrows wrinkling a little.

“Y...Yeah, how did you know that?”

Jihoon didn’t answer that question so you asked a different one.

“How long have you been here?” You asked him.

“Long enough to know that this convenience store is going to get a lot more popular,” he replied. He pushed the receipt in his pocket and gave you a short wave goodbye.

Chapter Six

[1dffexchange]

Great Unexpectations

To: Inm @in-madhouses​

From: E @unofficialxstyles​

Summary: Alana Bosworth thinks Dickens is overrated. That and the fact that there was no such thing as too much coffee.

Niall Horan begs to differ.

A tale of two different people, one coffeeshop and a how things never go the way we expect them to.

There probably was no such thing as too much coffee.

Sure, everyone talked about the effects of overdosing on caffeine-among which was infertility, by the way, but nobody actually cared. Coffee was a nectar of the Gods.

And sometimes, Alana Bosworth did think she was God.

Or at the very least maybe a distant, distant, distant relative of the heavenly being.

Afterall, she was able to (read: nearly) finish a ten thousand word assignment in one sitting a day before the submission deadline. If that was not a testament to her powers then perhaps, drinking a total of no less than six cups of coffee was.

Still, as Alana threw her body against the smooth wooden counter that overlooked a quiet, deserted street, she could not help but to second guess her coffee addiction. She hated to admit it but six cups did seem like a bit much.

So she did what any sane person would do in her shoes-she reached for her phone and punched in some numbers. The person on the other end of the line picked up after three rings, specifically, but what was supposed to be cordial greeting was instead replaced with muffled screaming and a loud thud.

Ouch.

“Henry…Henry I told you…no, no,” the voice at the other end of the line sounded distressed but Alana merely waited it out. “Honey, please. Okay, okay, fine, eat the cake,” There was another muffled scream, random shuffling and then, at long last, a proper, “Hello,”

“Hello to you, too, Kat,” Alana responded brightly, adjusting herself so that she was seated upright once more.

“Alan? Hi,” came the response. Unlike before, Katherine Bosworth-Ferguson sounded a little more excited this time. “How are you? You haven’t called in like two weeks. Mum was getting worried, you know. She keeps thinking you’re passed out drunk in a London pub or something and one of these days she’d be getting a call to let her know that you’re dead,”

Alana cringed.

First of all, pubs were never her thing.

Second of all, she did wish her mother had more faith in her.

“You guys actually give me far less credit than I deserve, Kat. You know I could bust ass if need be,” Alana replied, waving her hand in a dismissive gesture. There came a sound at the other end of the line once more, a little croak that indicated Kat already had a counter argument fully ready to launch but Alana quickly cut her off. There were more pressing matters at hand.

“Hey, listen I know it’s late I was just calling to see if you maybe knew how much coffee is like too much coffee? As in a lethal amount?” Alana questioned.

Three beats of silence passed.

Birds chirped.

Henry dropped his fork on his now empty chocolate cake plate.

“You….called me….to…ask about…coffee,”

“I’m figuring if there’s anyone who’d know about such things, it’d be a nurse and you’re a nurse so,”

“Exactly what time is it there,”

The question prompted Alana to glance at the watch she had on. “A little after 12.....oh,” The redhead sheepishly smiled, even though her older sister could not witness her slight embarrassment. “It’s early there,”

If eyerolls could be heard, she was pretty sure she heard Katherine’s tumble to the back of her head.

“You should be going to sleep,” was all Katherine said.

The screaming resumed.

“Listen, Alana, I would love to catch up but Henry is now covered in chocolate cake and heaven knows what else so I should really go. Henry…Henry no,” Once again, Katherine sounded livid. “But to quickly answer your question, caffeine has side effects so don’t drink too much of it. It does increase memory, though so if you’re into entering the spelling bee or something, coffee is your best bet. Text me…later, or call me at a better time…maybe text before you do…I have to go. Henryyyyyy,”

With that, the line went dead.

Sisters before misters, they always said.

Unless of course one had a sister with a robust three year old keen on destroying everything he touches.

Then maybe it was time to get a mister.

Or maybe not. Those were always a problem, too.

Knowing she’d get nowhere that night with her burning questions about coffee, Alana pursed her lips, threw her phone into her bag and then resumed her position slumped against the counter. She closed her eyes for all of seven seconds.

“Uhm, miss,”

Good things never did last, of course.

Alana opened one eye and was met with a tall, blonde man looking at her with an odd mixture of curiosity, politeness and a hint of irritation.

She opened the other eye and sat up. He pointed at the clock on the wall.

“We’re closed. We actually closed fifteen minutes ago and….you have to go,” his accent was think but his tone, albeit a little understandably impatient, was apologetic.

Alana nodded her head in understanding and stood up, mumbling her own apology. “Didn’t see the time. Life gets like that when you have to finish a damn assignment on three hours of sleep after finishing one the day before. Life sucks and especially so before Christmas break,”

Alana began packing her bag, throwing a stack of notes and her laptop into her carry on before stacking four empty coffee cups neatly and handing it over to the barista. She knew he was the barista because he was a familiar face-he had been making her coffee over the last year with no less enthusiasm than an energizer bunny each time.

He did not prepare her coffee consistently, of course, but he was there often enough to know her coffee order before she even got a word out and to sometimes use his staff discount.

When the weather was extra nice, they’d even engage in small talk.

His name was Niall.

“Tell me about it,” Niall replied cordially. “I’m this close to being dead but you know…extra cash always helps; especially around Christmas. And they say a bachelor’s will get you far in life….They never mentioned the need to get through this phase, first,”

Alana snorted, then nodded in understanding. “Yeah. Bachelor’s? More like Bache’s gonna kill me,”

Niall, much to his credit, had the courtesy to chuckle lightly at what Alana already knew was a failed attempt at a joke. He held the coffee cups in a silent gesture of goodbye.

“I… should go clean up. Goodnight,”

“Goodnight,”

She watched Niall disappear behind the double doors that led to the kitchen before heaving a sigh. The young woman grabbed her coat and began her trek back to her dorm room-just two blocks down from Barney’s Coffee & Cakes.

Replaying the few words that she and Niall had exchanged earlier, the reminder of Christmas approaching made her smile in nostalgia. With the most awaited holiday just two weeks away, despite her excitement of spending it abroad for the first time in her life, she did at times wish she had chosen to spend it with her family. She could already picture Katherine, Joshua and Henry taking a photos with the Christmas tree at her parent’s house, her father in his ugly Christmas sweater insisting everyone taste the turkey he’d already perfected the recipe for and just staying up with her mother on Christmas night, talking about all the things they were thankful for in the last year.

The mental image made her miss her family a little bit more but she comforted herself with the fact that she was about to experience something different, this time with friends she had made over the last year, which made the anxiety dissipate a little.

By the time she had reached her front door and turned the key into the lock, Alana was, once again, affirmed over the decision of staying in London for Christmas instead of heading back to Los Angeles a week early.

That is, until she opened the door to a sight straight out a porn production.

“Holy Jesus,”

The curse that left Alana’s mouth broke the obvious sex laden trance two of her friends were in and they immediately broke apart while having the decency to actually look guilty. She rolled her eyes and threw her hands up in the air, making her way towards the kitchen.

“I thought you weren’t coming home,” It was Soo Young-Soo to everyone else-who spoke first. She got up from her position on the sofa and trotted towards Alana. The latter thanked the heavens Soo still had her t-shirt on.

“And what gave you the idea?” Alana poured herself a glass of water.

“I don’t know. You might have decided that someone at the coffeeshop was worth getting laid with. You spend like…all your time there,” Soo commented, positioning herself next to Alana against the kitchen counter.

“Not all-”

“All,” Zayn, Soo’s boyfriend, volunteered. Upon careful inspection when her attention was turned to him, she noted that he too was still fully clad. “Would it kill you to live a little, Alan?”

“I only go there when I need to complete an assignment,”

“That doesn’t mean being there all the time?” Soo poked Alana’s arm, earning a protest from the latter. “Honestly, Alan….you’re beautiful and you’re funny sometimes. Talk to people. So what if you don’t meet deadlines? Not making it for one assignment wouldn’t kill your grades,”

Alana offered Soo a stare that could rival Medusa’s.

“You forget that I’m here on exchange and my grades do matter because my records are going to be sent back to UCLA and I want to graduate when I get back or my year in London will come to moot,”

“Your year in London is already moot,” Zayn argues. “You came to London a boring bug and you’re leaving London…a boring bug,”

She loved Zayn-adored him, really-but sometimes, he had the emotional quotient of a pig.

In an attempt to defend herself and to prove a point of sorts, Alana crossed the space between them and smacked Zayn squarely on the head. There were times where she hated his truthful and wise moments-even if they were….truthful and wise.

“I’m not boring. I party with you guys,” Alana defended herself.

Zayn chortled.

Soo grunted in apparent disagreement.

Alana looked between them both.

“Look, Alan, there’s nothing wrong with being a homebody and considering game night a party but really, let loose a little,” Zayn advised. “Like Soo said…you’re young and beautiful. And maybe call yourself Lana instead of Alan,”

“What’s wrong with Alan? I like Alan and everyone calls me that,” Alana scrunched her face up. “It’s much more unique than an Alana being called Lana,”

Logic, duh.

“Yeah,” Zayn stifled a yawn. “But being an Alan won’t get you laid as often,”

“You’re very misogynistic you know. You’re lucky I love you or I’d have put a lock on our door a long time ago,”

This time, Soo laughed from where she was in the kitchen and Alana cracked a smile.

Of all the things that had happened in the last year-which really was not much- she was most thankful for having Soo as a roommate and then, by default, meeting and becoming friends with Zayn. Unlike her, they were both students with King’s College and were her first friends. It was Soo who brought her on a ‘Locals Only London’ tour on her first week here and Zayn who invited her to his birthday party-where she met a few other friends she had grown to appreciate.

In turn, it was one of her outer circle of friends who had introduced her to Barney’s-which quickly became her sanctuary. It was less popular than the other coffeeshops in the area because it was a little rundown-with some scratched out tables and rickety chairs-but somehow, Alana thought those very features held true the coffeeshop aesthetics and were ones that made the place all the more cosy.

Plus, Zayn and Soo did occasionally get up to no good in the room so to Barney’s was a quick escape plan.

“Life’s not all about getting laid though is it,” Alana finally replied, sitting herself proper next to Zayn. Soo soon joined her other side. “Anyway, getting laid thoughts aside…are we still doing the Christmas gift exchange thing with Harry and Jen?”

It was the highlight of Alana’s Christmas abroad.

At the mention of this, surprisingly, the previously playful air around them tensed a little and Alana did not miss the look Soo and Zayn shared. Instantly, it sent warning bells ringing in her head. When they had talked about Christmas plans a month ago, it was Soo who suggested they had a small gathering in a nearby bar-just having drinks and hosting a gift exchange. Alana had jumped on the idea, thinking it was a perfect way to celebrate the holiday.

“About that….” Soo broke the silence, biting her lip as if not liking her next words, either. “Zayn’s parents invited us down to Braford for the holidays and we…kinda agreed. It was totally last minute, we didn’t know,”

“Harry and Jen will still be here,” Zayn offered.

Alana felt her heart clench but she quickly gathered herself and smiled. Holidays were family time, too, and she could not be selfish about things like these. Besides, Zayn and Soo had done so much for her-she could not expect them to stay back against their will, too.

“I’m not as close to them but…it’s okay. We’ll manage. You guys go, have fun,” Alana assured them. “Say hi to your siblings for me, Zayn. Would love to meet them someday,”

Zayn ruffled the top of her head.

“Will do, Lana,”

Alana groaned. “It’s Alan,”

Soo hugged them both.

---

Christmas eve in London was like one of those postcards on a window display one saw whilst walking along the streets heading to the Tower Bridge. It was snowing lightly, bright lights lit up the street and there were muffled noises of celebration going around campus. Alana jammed her hands inside her pockets, soaking in the sights as she headed to Barney’s. It was two hours till Christmas and she did not feel like spending Christmas eve alone so she had decided to head to her favourite hangout instead.

Soo and Zayn had left for Bradford three days before. An unusually teary Soo apologised profusely for pulling out the plug on their holiday plans and it took a firm hearted Zayn to pull her away and multiple assurances from Alana that they’d see each other before Alana went back to the States before Soo would let her go. Alana gave them both their little gifts-a bottle of Soju and pair of concert tickets for Soo and a thrifted leather jacket for Zayn which proclaimed his undying love for Guns and Roses, embroidered at the back-before bidding temporary goodbye.

That Christmas eve, Harry, Jen and her had met up at the pub as planned, sharing a few drinks before doing the exchange. At Harry’s invitation to attend a Christmas eve countdown party afterwards, Alana had decline, using the excuse that she was a little bit tired. In truth, however, Alana had no interest in spending time with people she barely knew.

She was certain she would have listed the benefits of coffee to an unsuspecting stranger and branded herself a weirdo for life and she would very much like her Christmas eve to be pleasant.

Even if Jen did stay true to her teasing promises and gave Alana an ugly sweater for Christmas.

Finally arriving at Barney’s, Alana was unsurprised to find that it was even emptier than it was before. Despite the wooden walls being decorated with proclamations of a “Merry Christmas” and a few miserable Christmas cards, Alana doubted anyone would want to ring in Christmas drinking coffee. The young woman walked up to the counter, ordered herself a latte then sat herself by the usual spot, by the window, as she awaited for her coffee to cool down.

As she stared out the window and watched people heading towards their Christmas plans, Alana could not help but to admit that she’d miss Barney’s as much as she’d miss Soo and Zayn. Barney’s had seen her through late nights, early mornings and days where she just needed to treasure her aloneness. Somehow, the wooden walls has seen her grow over the last year-the unusually quiet girl had taken a leap of faith, going to another country for an entire year, alone, merely to pursue the unknown. It was a walking cliché but hell, it was Christmas eve.

Heaving out a breath, Alana pulled her knees up to her chest and took out the book she had been attempting to read over the last week. One of her classmates, while in conversation about the best literary classics of all times, found herself in genuine disbelief when she realised that Alana had not yet read Great Expectations. Alana had defended herself, letting her classmate know she had attempted it before but just never properly understood it and had given up. She was presented the book a day later by the very same classmate with the promise that she would read it over the Christmas break.

Her second attempt, so far, was a failure. She was at page twenty seven when she closed the book, pushing it across the table in mild frustration.

“Not a fan of Dickens?”

It was Niall.

Alana looked up to find him looking at her in ill-disguised amusement.

“I just don’t think it’s as much a classic as its touted to be. Or maybe I just don’t understand it,”

“You think Great Expectations is sub-par?” Niall had the audacity to look surprised now. He perched his bucket of collected mugs against his hips, eyebrows raised.

Alana made a face, then chuckled.

“Wait here,”

Before Alana could protest or question the semi-stranger before her, Niall disappeared behind the double doors. When he re-emerged, he spoke in hushed tones to the other barista, gesturing towards her. With a firm nod from the other, Niall undid his apron and quickly joined Alana, sitting across from her.

He would have been skiving had it not been for the fact that the only customer was her.

“Care to tell me what this is about?” Alana’s asked. She leaned back in her chair, then folded her arms across her chest.

“I’m here to tell you what you missed out with Dickens,”

Niall’s grin was smug.

“Right…because what I really need on Christmas eve is a lecture about the great Charles Dickens,” Alana mocked, looking pointedly towards the book.

Niall seemed to contemplate his response and in those moments, Alana dared a glance at him. Only then did she fully register that his eyes were a deep blue and that he had a slightly dented chin. His hair, while mostly blonde, had highlights of auburn in them.

Strange how she had seen him throughout the year and only then noticed the most obvious details.

“About that…why are you here on Christmas eve?” Niall’s sudden change in topic caught Alana off guard, causing her to frown. Her response prompted Niall to shoot his arms up in defence and after laughing lightly, added. “I mean, I’m sure you have better Christmas plans than coming here to get drunk on coffee,”

“I don’t get drunk on coffee,”

“Well, with a six cup black coffee record, you might as well have,”

“I’ve had ten once back home,”

“And….where is home?”

The question, although catching Alana off guard, caused her to grin. “Smooth one-if that’s your way of finding out where I live,” Alana pursed her lips, reaching for her coffee. “Home is Los Angeles. Only here for exchange…which officially ends in a week,”

Sometimes, when Alana got nervous, she tended to give more than she cared to admit.

“That’s…pretty far from here. No plans tonight?”

Alana shook her head no, then added. “My grand total of two friends decided to love it up back in his hometown so I’m left with a barely friends Christmas secret Santa thing and Dickens in a coffeeshop,”

Yup, she was definitely nervous.

Instead of appearing sorry for her, however, Niall shrugged.

“Sounds a whole lot better than working on Christmas eve,” his voice was laced with an undertone of sadness and that alone, somehow, made Alana sit up a little bit straighter.

“Well, you have your barista buddy if it counts for anything…and an equally lonely customer,”

As if to proof a point, Alana raised her cup in a quiet toast before sipping her drink.

“Jack’s about to knock off; he has a party to get to…but you’re more than welcomed to stay,” Niall stood up then and jammed his hands into his pockets. “I uh…better go clean up. We close at twelve so don’t make me chase you out…again,”

“Wouldn’t be the first time,” Alana joked.

“Hopefully it wouldn’t be the last, either,”

The laughter that escaped Alana’s lips carried through the now empty space, She chose to sit back and do nothing for a while, watching as mere minutes later, Jack emerged from behind the counter, waving at Niall as he approached the front door. He noticed Alana during these moments and with an enthusiastic “Merry Christmas”, was on his way.

Perhaps, in all of England, her Christmas was the most boring.

In the two hours that followed, Alana alternated between attempting Dickens and checking her phone-though she spent more time doing the second. The group chats she was in were filled with Christmas greetings and updates, the most active being one of her family and her close friends back home. Both groups seemed to be preparing for Christmas in full swing. Her father was roasting the turkey, as usual, and her friends were already calling dibs on what they’d be bringing to the party at Carlos’. Alana felt a pang of sadness wash over her but as quickly as it came, she halted her thoughts by reaching for Dickens, focusing now on Pip and his journey on Christmas eve.

Perhaps, in some greater metaphor of sorts, Dickens on Christmas did seem appropriate.

“Looks like I am going to chase you out,” Niall’s sudden interruption brought her out of her semi-reverie in nineteenth century England.

“Is it twelve already?” Alana looked at the clock to find that they were exactly five minutes away.

“Not yet but I wanna wish you Merry Christmas instead of chasing you out right at midnight. That would be very Fairy Godmother of me,”

“Indeed,” was all Alana said before standing up, packing her bag and then swinging it over her shoulder.

“Did you get anywhere with Dickens?”

“First base, if I’m lucky. But I think it’s more of a cordial friendship at this point,” When the response was met with a puzzled look from Niall, Alana giggled. “We’re at page forty and I am still not impressed,”

Niall did the unthinkable then.

“Come over to my place then…tomorrow…not tonight…because I have to clean up and it’s…not appropriate, anyway,”

Alana blinked.

Twice.

In slow motion.

“I mean…if you want to. I did a review on Dickens last semester and maybe it’d be easier for you to understand and appreciate it and also….I kinda don’t want to spend Christmas alone,”

As if to confirm her suspicion, Alana asked. “You’re asking me out?”

“No…yes…I mean…we’ve known each other almost the year right so that makes us friends and we’re just…hanging out on Christmas and I have gingerbread cookies and we could talk Dickens or not and you can say no-”

The rest of Niall’s words blurred into the background and in its place was Zayn’s voice telling her she needed to live a little and live a life outside Barney’s that was less calculated. Leaps of faith were never her thing but perhaps, there was no harm in this one-especially since she knew deep down, she had nothing to lose. It was a tiny gathering between friends and if she had to put it in her own words and her own terms, it was kind of like a Christmas study date.

“-and of course I have boardgames and-”

“Okay,” Alana answered at last. “I’m pretty sure we’d get nowhere with Dickens but I do love gingerbread cookies,”

Niall held in his response for a moment after the agreement was forged, unable to belief that his spontaneous idea of asking a fellow lone soul to spend Christmas together would bear fruit.

“Yeah…yeah okay,” Niall finally found his words but unconsciously scratched the back of his neck in sudden shyness. “I’ll go get my phone and then text you my address,”

While Niall went to get his phone, Alana quickly reached for hers and with rapid speed and an equally quick heart rate, ignored the multiple texts she received to send a message to Soo.

“Got asked out on an almost date for Christmas. Merry Christmas to you and Z!!!!!!!!! xxxxxx”

Just as she hit send, Niall emerged once more and handed his phone to her so she could type in her number. A knowing smile formed on her lips, however, when the name space was filled with the name “Karen”.

“Uhmm…my name is actually Alan. Short for Alana. Alana Bosworth,”

Niall looked puzzled. “What do you mean….?”

“I mean….” Alana paused and licked her lips, unable to hold in a laugh that eventually escaped her lips. She held his phone up. “I mean my name is Alana not Karen. You might have misheard me saying Alan…everyone calls me Alan…. and assumed my name was Karen and wrote it down by mistake. You’ve been writing it wrong the whole year,”

It was Niall’s turn to blink twice. In slow motion.

“What do you mean I’ve been writing your name wrong for a year?” Niall turned pale, his eyes reflecting obvious embarrassment. “Why have you never corrected me?”

“Because,” Alana was laughing without inhibitions now and gave herself a few moments to gather herself. “….Because you only asked once and I thought I could correct you the next time I saw you but you never asked for my name again so I’m….Karen,”

Niall ran a hand through his hair, opening his mouth as if to say something before quickly deciding against it. “You mean I’ve mistaken you for a Karen the whole year,”

Alana nodded in mock seriousness, the nudged her new friend. “It’s okay…no big,”

Typing her phone number in then, she gave herself a missed call before handing the phone back to Niall who looked a little less shocked than he was before but still clearly beating himself up over getting someone else’s name wrong for a whole year.

“Relax, Niall. It’s okay, really. At least now you know, right?” Alana assured him. “Text me your address tomorrow and we’ll meet up,”

Niall nodded his head robotically.

“Okay,” Alana was still amused as she backed away and towards the door. “Goodnight, Niall…and Merry Christmas,”

“Good….goodnight, Kar….Alan. See you tomorrow. Merry Christmas,”

Niall blew out a breath of utter shock as he watched Alana leave. When he finally fully recovered, he dialled a number on the phone. The other person picked up almost instantly.

“Hey…yeah buddy…Merry Christmas to you too. Listen, you wouldn’t belief what happened, Zayn….”

[chasholidays]

Hey so I'm a stressed little science major and I was wondering if you could do an angsty minty with a modern or college twist. Pre-relationship? I love angst and minty so anything would be good! Thanks!

Monty’s junior year of college is shitty before it even begins.

Sophomore spring sets the tone with three major events: Jasper’s study abroad application, Monty’s parents’ separation, and Harper and Monty’s breakup, in that order.

On its own, the study abroad thing wouldn’t be so bad. Monty had been a little anxious about it, mostly because he and Jasper have been going to the same school since they started going to school. He hasn’t always been in Jasper’s class, but Jasper has always been there at lunch and recess, during study halls, in the library and in his dorm and in his life.

In some ways, the prospect of Jasper being gone was exciting, and in other ways it felt necessary. They weren’t going to be together forever, which meant they had to be apart at some point. Junior year is as good a time as any.

He hears about the separation next, from his mother, during one of their weekly phone calls in March. “I know this is going to come as a shock to you, but your father and I have decided to separate.”

“Separate?” Monty echoes, his voice hollow. It had occurred to him, at various points in his youth, that his parents might not stay together, but some part of him had assumed that they were out of the woods now. That if his parents hadn’t broken up by the time he was a certain age, they just never would. You always heard about children of divorce, not college students of divorce.

“We talked about it a lot,” says Hannah. She sounds so tired. “And I think this is the only way.”

“Okay,” he says, because what else is there to say? This isn’t his decision. He’s not the tiebreaker vote. They already agreed.

“It’s for the best. For us, at least. And I hope now that you aren’t home so much, it won’t be–as difficult for you. We’re doing our best with this.”

“Yeah, I know.”

“Do you want to talk to your father?”

Somehow, he’d expected them to already be apart, not that his father would be there. But they do still love him, and they’ve still been married for twenty-plus years. They still know how to work together, so maybe it’s good that they’re breaking up before they lose that.

“Sure,” he says, and lets them talk until they feel better.

He doesn’t tell anyone but Jasper about the divorce because he doesn’t quite know how to feel about it. It’s not a big deal, in some ways, and it’s not even officially a divorce yet. They’re separating, and he’s not even home to witness it. It doesn’t affect his life that much.

He really does believe that. Like if he’s not there, it doesn’t matter what happens to his family.

He and Harper have been dating since freshman year, which means he maybe should have told her what happened, but every time he tried, the words didn’t come out. It felt like he was making a big deal over it and not making a big enough deal all at once, so it averaged out to just saying nothing.

He doesn’t think that’s why Harper breaks up with him–she’s got an internship over the summer and is studying abroad over the fall, plenty to keep her busy–but he can’t help wondering if it was a factor. If, despite his best efforts to remain unaffected by the whole thing, it did hurt him after all.

But still. It wasn’t as if he thought they’d be together forever or anything. So maybe it doesn’t matter much exactly when the breakup happens.

“Should have told her about your parents,” Jasper advises. “Then she wouldn’t have dumped you.”

“She didn’t dump me, we talked about it and agreed that breaking up was the right call. And I don’t want my girlfriend to stay with me just because my parents broke up.”

“I guess not,” Jasper grants. He slings his arm around Monty’s shoulders, gives him a squeeze. “You going to be okay?”

“Yeah, of course.”

And he thinks he is. He goes home for the summer and stays with his dad, who kept the old house, for June and July, and then in August his mom gets a new job and moves to Indiana, and he goes with her to help her get set up and get a feel for the new place. It’s nice, but it’s not his, in the same way the old house doesn’t feel like his anymore either. Part of growing up is realizing your parents are people too, but it’s hard to see them being people like this. He’s never wanted their lives to stay the same without him, but at the same time, he can’t help but feel like he’s being left behind.

He feels like a total asshole over the whole thing, selfish and immature, so he doesn’t mention it to anyone, not even Jasper. Instead, he goes back to school and keeps his head down, goes to classes and eats and studies, keeps himself busy enough that he doesn’t even realize until November how bad it’s gotten.

“You’re going to be here for Thanksgiving?” is the question that tips him off, coming from Bellamy Blake, his floor coordinator. It’s a position sort of like an RA, but with lower pay and fewer responsibilities, from what Monty can tell. His job is to be the person who lets the college know if anything is wrong in their dorm and communicates with the dean’s office, as well as serving as a general contact for anyone with a problem. He also collects dues from anyone who wants to pay them and uses them to set up activities, which Monty goes to largely because it’s something to fill the time.

Said position is probably why he knows Monty will be in the dorm; he must have gotten a list.

“Yeah.”

“Any plans?”

“Not really. I’ve got a really heavy course load and traveling is a pain, so I figured I’d just skip it this year.”

Bellamy nods. “Well, if you want something to do Thanksgiving day, Clarke’s local and her parents loaded, so they’re happy to take strays. Her dad is a great cook.”

“I’m fine.”

“Dude, you know there’s a law against college students turning down free food, right? I promise it’ll be good, we’ve got a few other students coming and the Griffins get awkwardly liberal when they’re drunk, not awkwardly conservative.”

Monty smiles a little. “I appreciate the offer, but it’s really okay."0

"Okay, last one,” says Bellamy. “This is a real offer, you can turn it down, but seriously, there’s no downside, and I’m making pie. Plus, I did Thanksgiving alone in the dorm freshman year and it sucked, so–” He shrugs. “We’ll give you a ride and you’re not doing anything else.”

It’s on the tip of his tongue to say no, but what actually comes out is, “How many other people are going?”

“Uh, let’s see–there’s me, Clarke, Miller, Raven, Wells. Everyone but Wells is a student here. Wells is her best friend, their families go way back, so adults are Professor Griffin, her husband, Wells’ dad, and I think Professor Sinclair.”

“Raven Reyes?” he asks. “And math professor Sinclair?”

“Yeah. Raven’s friends with Clarke and Professor Sinclair knows Clarke’s dad. And Raven, I guess.”

Monty doesn’t recognize any of the other names, but he likes Raven, and he’s met Clarke a couple times and likes her well enough too, and sitting alone in his dorm room would be–really sad, actually. And that’s what he’s done most of this year, when people have asked him to do things. With Jasper or Harper around, it was easier, but when he’s on his own, it’s easy to just be anti-social.

“You’re sure you can invite me?”

“Yeah, Jake extended a general invitation to anyone I knew who was going to be on campus.”

“Then yeah, thanks. That would be fun.”

His smile softens, pleased and warm. “Cool. Clarke and Miller have cars, so one of them can give you a ride. I’ll let you know where we’re meeting.”

He spends the rest of the evening dwelling on the interaction, more because he finds it so noteworthy than because he thinks it is. If he hadn’t been going home for Thanksgiving last year, and someone had invited him home with them–well, it probably wouldn’t have even happened like this, last year. He’s not going home because he didn’t want to pick between his parents and he really does have plenty of work to do. But if Jasper were around, or he was still dating Harper, they’d be excuses for him. He could have gone back to stay with his dad because he wanted to see Jasper, or Harper would have taken him to visit with her family. And if neither of those had worked out–

He’s been pretty anti-social, this year. He’s maybe forgotten how to just be a person with friends.

Not that going to his dormmate’s girlfriend’s house for Thanksgiving counts as having friends, but it’s at least non-academic human interaction, and that’s a good place to start. He’s been in a fog, and it would be nice to get out of it. So on Thursday morning he takes a shower and puts on a nice shirt and some slacks, checks to make sure his hair is in order. He asked if he should bring anything and Bellamy said no, but Monty has never believed anyone who told him not to bring something to an adult formal gathering, so he picked up a bottle of sparkling cider. It’s not as good as wine, but buying wine with a fake ID to bring to a professor’s house feels like a risky move.

He puts it in a nice bag and just looks at himself in the mirror for a long moment, trying to take stock of changes, not that there are many. It’s always easy to not tell when people are in rough shape, especially mentally. He’s not even sure who he would have expected to notice. He’s seen friends and acquaintances at meals, been normal with them. He’s opted out of social events because he has homework, but everyone does that. He probably looks more tired than he used to, but he’s taking some rough classes.

He tests out a smile in the mirror, finds he looks like a real person, and the thought makes the smile grow. He’s got this.

Bellamy said he was going over early to help out, so Monty could just get a ride with Miller and Raven, and told him when and where to meet them. If not for Raven’s involvement, he’d probably bail, but Raven is one of those socially competent smart people, and Monty will definitely be able to just hide behind her.

And, luckily for him, she’s already waiting outside the library when he gets there, hands stuffed in her pockets and breath puffing out into the cold air. He gives her a wave and a smile, and she returns both.

“Hey, long time no see.”

He shrugs. “Yeah, well, I stopped taking math classes because computers are cooler.”

“And I stopped taking computer classes because math is cooler, so–”

“There’s no way you’re done with computer classes.”

She grins. “Just for the semester. Got other shit to do, you know? What about you, what are you taking?”

Catching up on classes carries them through until the car shows up, and Raven gets into shotgun without comment, leaving Monty to climb in the back and come face to face with–

“Nate?”

Nate Miller was in Monty’s freshman English seminar on folklore, and he was and probably remains the number-one reason Monty suspects he could be kind of bisexual. They sat next to each other and shared notes and cracked jokes and Monty had been hoping something was going to happen, even went to a few parties where Nate was in the hopes of running into him. But the semester ended and they fell out of touch, and Monty and Harper became a thing, and Monty could ignore the whole crush-on-a-dude thing because it wasn’t really relevant to his life anymore. He had a girlfriend and he was happy.

Except now he’s single and still floundering and Nate Miller is smirking at him from the driver’s seat of his shitty car. “Hey, Monty, long time no see.”

“Didn’t know you two knew each other,” Raven says, looking surprised. “I’d give you shotgun, but the back doesn’t really have room for my leg.”

“It’s fine,” says Monty, smiling. “We were in the same English class freshman year.”

“How’ve you been?” Nate asks. “I didn’t make the connection when Bellamy said one of his dormmates was coming. Is he the most annoying floor coordinator ever?”

“He’s the most involved one I’ve ever had. But it’s pretty okay? He sets up a lot of stuff, but it’s usually fun and he doesn’t pressure us to do it. And I know that if I ever had a problem, he’d drop everything to help, so–overbearing but effective, I guess? And I wasn’t going to do anything for Thanksgiving, so I appreciate him getting me out of room and forcing me to hang out with his girlfriend’s family.”

“And a bunch of awesome people,” Raven adds. “Do you know Clarke?”

“Not very well. She comes to dorm stuff sometimes, but we haven’t chatted much or anything.”

“She’s cool,” says Raven. “Even though I know her because my boyfriend was cheating on me with her.”

Nate snorts. “Fuck, I forgot that’s how you met Clarke. What a dick that guy was. What was his name? Flynn?”

“Finn. He doesn’t even go here, he came to campus to see me and decided he was falling for her when they kept running into each other at the coffee shop.”

“Wow,” says Monty. “That’s–really something.”

“It turned out okay. Clarke and I dumped him, she found Bellamy, I found Zeke, I stalk Finn on instagram sometimes and he’s definitely single and alone. How’s Harper, by the way?”

The question doesn’t hurt, but it does make him wince a little. It’s less that he’s sad about it and more just the awkwardness, the need to deal with and manage people’s reactions. “She’s in Italy, studying abroad. But we broke up.”

Raven only shrugs. “That sucks. Jasper’s abroad too, right?”

“Yeah, full year in Kyoto.”

“Is he sending you a bunch of weird porn?”

He laughs, surprised. “And care packages full of snacks, yeah.”

“Awesome. So, let’s talk Thanksgiving, I assume you want a crash course on who’s going to be here.”

Raven takes control of the conversation, but in a nice, helpful way. Clarke’s mother apparently teaches at the university’s medical school, and her father is an engineer. Her best friend’s dad is a widower and local politician, but, again, a liberal one, which Nate says is important because it’s a very queer meal.

“Meaning?”

“Bellamy and Clarke are bi, I’m gay, Wells is pan, Raven’s–” He frowns. “Where are you thinking?”

“I think pan? I don’t know, I’m dating Zeke right now, but if we break up and a girl catches my eye, I’m cool with that. Are you our token straight?”

It takes Monty a second to realize she’s asking him. “I guess? I don’t know. I’m not against dating a guy, I’ve just never done it.”

He’s said it before, but just to Jasper, late at night, this theoretical admission that was never supposed to matter. In the car with Raven and Nate–Nate, the first guy he ever had a crush on–it feels too real and completely unearned.

But all Nate says is, “Cool, welcome to the queer meal. We have pie.”

Clarke opens the door for them when they arrive, her smile as bright as Monty’s ever seen. She hugs Raven and Nate, and then hugs him too, murmurs, “I’m glad Bellamy nagged you into coming.”

“Me too,” he says, and it turns out to be true. Everyone is perfectly friendly, and he interacts like a normal person, albeit a slightly awkward one. Clarke’s friend Wells is minoring in computer science, so he and Monty have that to talk about, and Professor Sinclair is always interesting. Bellamy’s a little more relaxed when he’s not an ostensible authority figure, Clarke is slightly drunk and loose, and Raven can’t stop smiling.

And then, of course, there’s Nate. Monty’s not sure if Nate is looking out for him deliberately or if he’s always a little apart from the group, but either way, they’re a unit during the meal. Monty finds out Nate and his ex-boyfriend broke up around when Monty and Harper did, that he’s majoring in English, that his dorm isn’t far from Monty’s. He’s here for Thanksgiving because his dad is a cop and works through Thanksgiving so he can take time off to be with his son at Christmas, which is kind of adorable.

The whole thing is kind of adorable, and it’s a little weird, to go straight from “failing to leave his dorm” to “new crush,” but Nate isn’t exactly a newcrush. He was just on hiatus.

Once they’re done with dessert, Mr. Griffin asks, “So, who’s up for board games? We’ve got options.”

“Pandemic?” Raven asks.

“Of course, what do you take me for? It’s Abby’s favorite.”

Monty’s flagging, but Raven’s eyes are alight with excitement, and he’s not going to be the dick who says they need to leave. And he does like board games, it’s just a lot of socializing, especially after so long avoiding situations like these.

“I actually need to get back to the dorm,” says Nate. “I told my dad I’d call him when his shift was done. Clarke, you can take Raven, right? Monty, you staying or coming back with me?”

“I should get back,” he says, hoping his relief isn’t palpable. Everyone’s been great, but he’s done. “I’ve got a program due right after break and it’s a mess.”

No one blinks an eye or tries to get him to stay, not even Bellamy. There are more hugs all around, Mr. Griffin attempting to make Monty take food home, everyone telling him he’s welcome any time he’s on campus for a holiday. He thanks them for having him, assures them that he’ll just steal Bellamy’s leftovers, and then they’re outside in the crisp air and Monty feels like he can breathe again.

“It can be a lot your first time,” Nate says, without Monty’s having to say anything. “I figured you might need to get out.”

“Just a little. They’re nice, but–”

“Like I said, I get it. And there’s definitely some–they really want to have a great holiday, and you can feel the strain.”

“Not always. But yeah, sometimes.”

Nate unlocks the car and waits until Monty is in his seat with his belt fastened before he goes on, “And, no offense, but you seem kind of beat.”

“None taken. I can be pretty introverted.”

“Yeah, but–before we even got there. Feels like you’re maybe having a rough semester.”

“Is it that obvious?”

He pauses for longer than it takes to start up the car and get moving. “I just remember how you were freshman year. I was feeling pretty overwhelmed at college, and you seemed like you had everything figured out.”

Monty smiles. “Yeah, I guess that would make sense.”

“So, are you okay?”

“I’m not used to being on my own,” he admits. “No Jasper, no girlfriend, and a lot of my friends are–not really friends, I guess. Not in a bad way!” he adds. “It’s not like they betrayed me or anything. Just they were more friends with Jasper or Harper than me, or we lived in the same dorm and now we don’t, or–”

“You had a class together and stopped talking after the class ended?” Nate supplies, and Monty colors in the dark.

“For example.”

“I’m not mad, it’s not like I knew how to keep in touch with you either. I sometimes wanted to, but I had kind of a thing for you, so I kept talking myself out of it.” He snorts. “Playing it so cool I iced you out.”

“You didn’t,” Monty hastens to assure him. “I didn’t think you were–I felt the same way, I guess. I wanted to stay in touch, but I didn’t know how and I didn’t want you to think I was coming on too strong or being weird so I just didn’t do anything. Except drag Jasper to some places I thought I might see you.” He swallows hard. Nate already said it, so he can say it too. It’s safe. And it’s in the past, right? They used to have a mutual crush, and now that’s over. “You were the first guy I was ever interested in in real life, I didn’t really know what to do with that.”

“It doesn’t get better when you’ve liked more guys,” Nate says. “It’s always a mess.”

“Great.” He leans back in his seat, closes his eyes. “My parents got a divorce. Or maybe they’re still just separated, I’m not sure where they are in the legal process. And I just keep thinking–they were married for twenty-three years and then they were done. How can you be with someone for that long and then just decide it’s over? Like, I look at me and Harper and I wasn’t sure we’d be together forever, but I could have kept dating her. And then I see Clarke and Bellamy, and they’ve been together for about as long as me and Harper were, but I believe in them. Like, I feel like they’re going to make it. But what does that even mean? They’re married for twenty years with a kid and then they decide they’re not happy anymore? I just–”

He finds himself almost gasping as he finishes, the deluge of words leaving him breathless and shaky. It’s been a rough year for Monty’s faith in anything.

“I guess it depends on what you mean by make it,” Nate says, and Monty is grateful beyond words that he just goes with it. Lets Monty process for a minute. “Just because people break up doesn’t mean they failed. My parents split when I was pretty young, and it was amicable. They got married because my mom got pregnant and decided it was better to break it off before they hated each other. She’ll be here for Christmas with her wife and their kids. My dad’s their uncle and I’m their big brother and they love us. My family didn’t get smaller when my mom left, it got bigger. So I guess it’s more–I bet your parents don’t feel like they wasted twenty years of their lives, you know?”

“I know. I think that’s part of the problem, maybe? It feels like I’m making too big a deal. Jasper’s parents got divorced when we were in middle school, and it sucked for him. They were fighting, he nearly had to move, they don’t even talk anymore. It feels stupid feeling this upset about it.”

“That’s bullshit. You don’t have to have the worst life ever to feel bad. It sounds like you lost all your support systems at once, that’s always going to be shitty. And it’s not like I was this well-adjusted, what, a few months out of the divorce? I was just a kid who missed having my mom living with me. And when she and Alison got together, I was still working through my own sexuality stuff, and I didn’t deal with it that well.”

Monty bites his lip on a smile. “You know, I think this is the most I’ve ever heard you talk about yourself.”

“Well, it’s been a while. Maybe I’ve changed.”

“Maybe.”

“Maybe I just like talking to you.” He clears his throat. “So, that’s why you didn’t go home for Thanksgiving?”

“Yeah, I didn’t know how to decide where to go. My parents live in different states now and it just seemed easier to not think about it. I’ve got a lot of work I can catch up on. And the common room’s empty, so I can play video games on the nice TV and not feel bad.”

“What about Christmas?”

“More time off, so I’m doing half the break with my mom and half with my dad. We’re not Christian, so the actual holiday isn’t a big deal.”

“That’s good.” They drive on in silence for a little, but it feels like a good silence, the kind where they’re both just–thinking. “I don’t want to not see you again until Bellamy drags you back to Clarke’s for Thanksgiving next year.”

“Is this every year now?” Monty asks, smiling a little.

Nate doesn’t let him change the subject. “What are you doing tomorrow?”

“So far, video games and programming.”

“If I bring my Switch, will you play Overcooked with me?”

“Sure.”

“Cool,” says Nate. “It’s a date.”

It’s not, Monty decides as he goes into his dorm, a solution, not all on its own. Even if he does get a new boyfriend out of this, it’s not going to solve everything, and it shouldn’t. His semester hasn’t been shitty because he was single, and if he and Nate do start dating, his world is still going to feel unstable beneath his feet for a while.

But even if nothing happens with him and Nate past tomorrow, he feels better. He told someone, and it wasn’t awful. He went somewhere and he had fun. He got through his first holiday break away from home, and it was fine.

It’s a nice night, the moon almost full and the air crisp, and Monty breathes it in, feels it down to his toes.

That’s a good enough start.

[woobaejin]

Kang Daniel — Home for The Holiday

Wanna One X Mini Winter / Christmas Series

Ha Sungwoon | Bae Jinyoung | Hwang Minhyun | Kim Jaehwan | Lee Daehwi | Park Jihoon | Ong Seongwu | Park Woojin 

December 25, 2017

Daniel X Reader

Word Count: 1224

“This is your pilot speaking. We are landing in about 15 minutes everyone. Please fasten your seatbelts and have a great Christmas day.” 

December 25th — 11:05AM / Incheon Airport. 

“You must be so tired now! Rest up and eat a bit before you go out.” Daniel’s parents came all the way from Busan to pick you up to surprise their son with his girlfriend. You haven’t been able to see him since February of last year due to preparations for Produce 101. Even when he was announced as one of the final members of the group, you couldn’t come to congratulate him due to studying abroad in the Netherlands that semester.

With his parents knowing how much you both missed each other, they decided to fly you in as a gift for the both of you to spend the holidays together. 

“I’ll be out for a bit after! It won’t take long. I’m just going to go see a friend nearby and be back.” You assured his mother with a sincere smile. You were very grateful for the fact that his parents approved of you despite being a long distance couple for now. 

“Mei already made the big box for you to hide under later. She left it in the kitchen so you just have to hide inside later. I bet he’ll be so excited to see you. I’m already excited to see you.” Daniel’s mother held your hand and grinned. 

After the long three-hour car ride, you finally reached the house. You set your belongings inside Daniel’s closet just in case for whatever reason, he decided to go into the room first and not open the “gift.” You scanned his place where his mother began to fill the area with gifts from fans, letters, and pictures of her son. 

You decided to lay in his bed and for some reason began to read through past text messages from Daniel. The last time you really messaged him was three days ago where you guys were talking about holiday plans. It made you feel sad because he really didn’t have any besides an extra two days off after Christmas to spend with his family. 

Rooney and Peter eventually joined you on the bed and laid right next to your legs. “Are you excited? He’s coming back soon.” You grinned and cuddled with both of his cats. 

You looked your wallpaper photo with him taken back in February and felt slightly sad. Knowing it’s been so long and that you couldn’t wait to finally change it. Placing your phone on the nightstand, you decided to take an hour nap before heading out to meet with your friend.

3:14PM — Coffee Shop

“Wow, I haven’t seen you in ages?!?!” Mei, a mutual friend of yours and Daniel, gave you a tight hug. “I know!! Thanks for making the box for me. I wish you could come tonight to see the surprise.” You slightly sulked. “Me too, but I have my own family party tonight. I asked Mrs. Kang to record it for me though so I’m not missing out that much.” She sipped on her warm latte and grinned. 

Mei, Daniel’s parents and yours were the only ones that knew of your relationship. The main contributor that definitely made you and him happen was Mei. Daniel and Mei’s family were super close, but you and Mei went to the same international high school in Busan. 

She eventually introduced the two of you and from then on was history. 

“Do you have any plans for tomorrow? He has two days off.” You pulled out your phone and looked up potential places today. “See, I don’t know if he wants to go anywhere or stay home. He hasn’t seen his parents in a while too so I’ll probably ask him later tonight. I would be okay just staying inside too.” 

“He’s probably going to take you out late at night to avoid people. The last thing you want to do is get caught.” You let out a sigh and agreed. You didn’t want a scandal to break out at the peak of his popularity. 

As two hours passed by, you finally parted ways with Mei and headed back to Daniel’s house.

6:37PM — Daniel’s house

You started to help Daniel’s mom with the Christmas dinner. “Cut the vegetables and put it in the soup when you’re done!” Daniel’s mom began to make his favorite noodles, while his dad was out on the patio cleaning the barbeque grill. His parents wanted their son to eat well after months of hard work and they were ready to spoil him with his favorite dishes. 

He was on his way back from the airport, and it was only an hour till he arrived. You ran around the kitchen, washing the vegetables, frying the fish and making sure everything was cooking well. You carried the uncooked meat outside to his father and watched him put the meat on the grill, making your mouth water and your hunger grow even more.

7:49PM

“He’s five minutes away!!” His mother screamed to which you ran into the living room and his father putting the box over you. “Are you okay (Y/N)? The top is cut so you can just pop out through the paper when he’s near the box!” Your heart was pound rapidly, yet excitedly to finally be in the arms of your man. 

You sat there patiently until the ring of the doorbell finally caught your attention. “Ah, mom it smells good!” The familiar voice caught your attention immediately to which you prepared yourself. “What’s this?” You could feel your boyfriend approaching the box slowly. “Ah, we got your a new mini fridge for Christmas. Take back to the dorm.” “Mom we don’t have a lot of space..” Daniel’s mother insisted on him opening it out and right when you felt a hand on top of the box, you shot up immediately, startling the man. 

“SURPRISE! MERRY CHRISTMAS” You opened your arms and couldn’t help but laugh at Daniel’s expression. Immediately, he hugged you which caused you to tear up. “I missed you so much...” He muttered while burying his face in the crook of your neck. “I missed you too, Daniel... so much.” 

“Come out to eat soon!” Your parents watched in satisfaction and decided to go out on the patio to give you both some alone time.

Daniel helped you out of the box and clung to you as you made your way to Daniel’s room. “Put your things away and let’s go out and eat.” You kissed his cheek and rolled his suitcase and forced him to put everything away quickly in his room. 

“Were you surprised?” You sat on his bed as he took off his winter coat. “Yeah! I going to face time you right after dinner.” He held your hand and kissed the top of your head. “So happy that you’re here.” 

You wrapped your arms around his waist and pecked his lips quickly. “Your parents and I are so happy you’re home. Merry Christmas, love.” 

"DANIEL!!!! YOUR DAD’S SAYING THE MEAT'S GETTING COLD!"

“I’M COMING MOM!!!” 

[missmeltycat]

Tekken RP-Fic - (ONGOING) - King of Iron Fist Tournament 8

This is an ongoing RP that I am slowly converting into a fic between myself and @thatredheadedchick12

Main Characters:

Bryan Fury (Played by Sydney)

Sergei Dragunov (Played by me)

Raihiko Kobayashi (OC - Played by Sydney)

Rachel ‘Rae’ Taylor (OC- Played by me)

Paul Phoenix (Played by both, mostly Sydney)

Forest Law (Played by both)

King (Played by both)

Steve Fox (Played by both)

Nina Williams (Played by me)

Anna Williams (Played by me)

Lee Chaolan (Played by me)

Jin Kazama (Played by both)

Kazuya Mishima (Played by both)

This will be VERY NSFW, so all chapters will be added under a ‘Keep Reading’ barrier to protect fragile eyes.

NOTE: This fic has tried to keep characters as in character as possible, but obviously with some bending for plot reasons. Some personal headcanons also included.

WARNINGS:

Bad Language

Violence/Gore

Sex/Nudity (Some implied non-con)

Drug/Alcohol/Tobbacco Use

Mild racism

Chapter 1

A new tournament, a new era. The strangest events had happened throughout the world during the last event. With Heihachi reported dead, the tournament had been held by an unknown sponsor. No one knew who, or any of the finer details, just that they would be fighting for a cash prize and possible contract for something much greater. Whatever it was, it attracted the usual crowd.

Rae had heard of the tournament many years before. As a teen she had eagerly watched the events on the TV with her family, but it had not been until the new announcement that she had even considered entering. Her hand-to-hand skills had been pretty weak at best, but she had decided to set a goal for herself to enter. Oh, what she could do with that prize money! She grinned to herself as she imagined a win, cheque in hand, people cheering. She didn't care much about the glory, but the money was certainly enticing.

She had come from a poor background. A small village in the United Kingdom where most people worked their fingers to the bone for enough money to live on and take care of their families. She came from a small family. One mother, one father and her two siblings. They had always struggled to make ends meet, even with everyone working, so the prize money would certainly change everything for the better. So, with the try outs over, the contract signed, she was good to go.

---

The day of the first heat arrived and Rae had flown out to the first location. She had never felt so important. A private jet, free accommodation? It was sweet. At the first stage she sat in a makeshift area that had been erected for the entrants to change, get ready and even train in and was surrounded by so many familiar faces. Ones she had seen on TV so many times. Excitement and anxiety welled up within her. She had never dreamed she would get to meet them, let alone have to fight against them. A surge of panic hit her like a tonne of bricks, as the realisation hit her that they were skilled and she was probably going to get beaten very badly. Despite her training day and night, she still worried that she was not good enough. An anxious sign left her lips as she sat and watched Paul Phoenix train with a dummy, his powerful punches landing in the most brutal fashion.

---

Raihiko was ready. She had been training for years for this tournament and she was finally able to compete. After the preliminaries, she signed the contract and headed to the first rounds of the Iron Fist.

As she walked into the make shift training area, the sounds and smells of the competition hit her hard. She was really here. She was really doing this.

She had never cared for hand to hand combat. She enjoyed the sound of metal on metal, the feel of the steel slicing through flesh. She had been forced into similar competitions, though you won your life, not money. This could prove to be an interesting competition. Hell, the only reason she even agreed to begin training was for the cash alone.

She wore her sparring garb, feeling quite naked without her tonfa strapped to her hips.

She stood and watched as a woman went to town, beating the shit out of a bag of sand. Her clothes were... Revealing. How could one fight in such a garb when there was the lingering fear of your tits falling from your top? She disliked women like that. Half the time they did it to purposefully reveal themselves, either to gain the upper hand or for attention. She sort of hoped she would be fighting the woman today. She could beat her ass and get her out of her sight.

She began walking again, not quite looking where she was going, suddenly hitting a brick wall. Or at least that was what it felt like.

"Oh! I am- uh..." she looked up at the menacing form of a man. If he could be called that. He was tall, severely scarred with white hair and a skeletal mask across his face.

"Watch where the fuck you are going." he grunted as he walked away without another word.

Rae was sat on a small wooden bench, adjusting her knee and elbow pads when she heard a growling voice come from down the side of the lockers next to her. It seemed all the other fighters in the ready room hadn't even registered it. They were obviously used to trash talk and scuffles to the point it didn't bother them. She turned her head and leaned around so she could look at who had complained and caught sight of two extra people. A Japanese woman wearing black attire and a white haired... Monster of a man. Her eyes moved up and down as she noted all the scarring on his chest. Were those bullet holes!? She quickly looked away and yanked on the straps of her elbow pads. She knew who he was now, but he was so much more intimidating in person. Would she have to face him that round? She sure as hell hoped not.

Paul finished beating seven shades out of the training dummy, stretched and made his way over to the bench to grab a towel. After wiping his head and wrapping it round his neck, he let out a hearty laugh. "Nothin' beats a good traning session, man. Nothin'!" Rae gave him a half-smile and straightened her shoulder pads. "You wanna get in a quick practice round before we start?"

Rae shook her head. "I'm, er... I'm good. I think I'll save my energy for the actual match."

Paul shrugged and looked over to Raihiko and gave a wave with his gloved hand. "Yo! Newcomer! Wanna spar some?"

Raihiko jumped as she turned quickly to come face to face with a man with a strange hair style waving at her. Well this just keeps getting better and better.

"I... Would but, I must find my locker and warm up. Perhaps we shall be put together in the ring?" she smiled and waved him off before continuing on. She found her locker, tossing her stuff on a bemch besides a young brunette woman. She shoved her given key into the slot and opened it, tossing her bag in, the destinct clinking of steel sounding within. She flinched as she looked around hoping no one heard. She would never cheat, but she just couldnt part with her beloved tonfa. She slammed the locker shut before shoving her key into her bossom.

Rae stood and kicked the toes of her boots on the floor to make sure they were on right and couldn't help but chuckle as Paul gave an almost defeated look at them both.

"Aw shucks, ain't no one willing to spar these days." He slowly trudged his way over to his locker, unlocked it, reached inside and started munching on something. The wrapper was noisy.

"So..." Rae turned to Raihiko. "You speak English? I'mglad. Some of the people here don't. I was worried I might not be able to at least hold a conversation." She tugged on her gloves and zipped up her blue leather jumpsuit as much as she could without trapping her own skin up in it. "What brings you here? Or should I not be talking to you? I don't even know protocol at these events yet."

Paul peered out from his locker with his cheek bulging. "Nah, s'ok. Itsh good t'talk. Jusht..." He swallowed loudly. "Just pick yer people wisely."

Raihiko slammed her locker shut and sat down to adjust and tighten her boots.

"Hai, I spent several years abroad in the US so I had to learn. Thise Americans. It is a wonder they can breathe unassisted. No offense." she looked over to the man who was stuffing his face with a shrug before turning her attention back to the brunette.

"Kobayashi, Raihiko. And you are?" she asked with a smile. She was weary, but she would be friendly. After all, she didnt want to make enemies right out the gate. Seemed she already pissed off one big ass brute. No sense in pushing her luck.

"Rae... Uh, sorry. Rachel." She offered her hand to shake, but quickly retracted it out of nervousness. "Taylor."

Paul choked on whatever it was that he was eating and pounded on his chest for a moment. "Heyyy, we aren't all that bad y'know! Some of us can breathe just fine! Well, when not inhaling crumbs."

Rae snickered over at the man and he cleared his throat, before turning back to Raihiko. "I saw you almost died a moment ago. Good job on not getting torn to bits there."

Raihiko looked to the American, raising a brow as she looked him over, as though her point was just proven. She then turned her attention back to Rachel.

"What, big bad and ugly? Heh. Yeah. Making friends already. I hope I am not against him. There is something in his eye that isnt right." she shrugged as she stood and straightened her garb. This was going to be interesting.

Rae tilted her head a little to grin at Paul again, then looked back at Raihiko. "You... Don't know about him huh? Well, I'd say there's something off for sure." She adjusted her shoulder pads once more to make sure they were all set and shook her head. "Believe me, facing off with him is something I am NOT looking forward to. He's terrifying."

Paul slowly scooted over and scratched the back of his neck. "Ol' Be-ran there?"

"Oh fuck, don't let him hear you call him that." Rae couldn't help the snorting laugh that came out her mouth.

"He hits hard, but he has his weaknesses. When I faced off with him last I saw that he leaves himself wide open."

"Oh?"

"Yeah, man. He's all about them power hits!"

Raihiko raised a brow as she glanced at the brute. He was currently beating the snot out of a practice dummy. He reared back for a hell of a punch and sand went flying everywhere as the poor thing exploded. Rai blinked before turning her attention back to the two.

"So I take it he is a usual competitor? Forgive me, i have not actually seen any of the fights. My Sensei told me about it a few years ago and began training me for it." she shrugged as she went back to tightening her boots and straightening her attire. "So who else is a returning competitor? Are you?" she asked as she looked at Rae.

She shook her head as she waved a hand in the air to swat away a little dust that had blown their way. "No. This is my first time too."

Paul let out a stifled snort, to which rae responded with an exasperated sort of glare. "Really?"

"Hey, c'mon. I couldn't help it. That one was jess too easy!" He turned to Raihiko and flexed a bicep. "I'm always in these tournaments. I've been comin' since day one!"

Rae snorted. "I bet."

"Ayyyy!"

The two gave a small fist bump, before turning in surprose as the remains of the training dummy Bryan had been pounding was hurled over their heads. It landed in a heap of ragged sack cloth on top of the lockers.

Raihiko quickly ducked in order to avoid getting hit with any flying debris. She quickly turned and glared at the white haired brute.

Bryan grinned a malicious grin as he watched the small group by the lockers. Oh how he hoped he would be in the ring with that red haired jap. Teach the little cunt a lesson for running into him.

Great. Now sand was all in her hair. Rae glared over at Bryan, but instantly regretted it. "Ah shit."

Paul scruffed at his hair and dusted himself off. "Sup?"

"Nothing. It doesn't matter. Any ideas who we are against first?"

"I think I saw you were against Christie Monteiro on the roster. I'm against Lucky Chloe."

"Ew." Rae wrinkled her nose. That girl had appeared out of no where in the previous tournament. She was an idol and she disgusted her to her core. "I feel for you, I really do."

Paul let out a very loud, raucous laugh. "Y'think that's bad? I think I saw Raihiko here was pitted against Alisa Bosconovitch!"

Bryan raised a brow as he glared right back at the brunette. Who did she think she was? Glaring at him like that. He held the post to the dummy in his hand, squeezing it tightly and reducing it to splinters before he trudged off to find another to beat the shit out of before the tournament started.

Raihiko looked to Paul, a curious look on her face.

"Who is this Alisia?" she asked as she finished her adjustments and crossed her legs as she sat straight. She didnt like the sound of his taunting.

Rae kept glancing back to Bryan, then to Paul and Raihiko and back again, the fear that she'd well and truly made herself a target sending shivers down her spine.

Paul grinned, oblivious to her inner turmoil and folded his arms. "She's a robot. Pink hair. A bit cringey really. I mean, what does she think she is, some anime character? You'll see anyway. Have a good one, yeah? I gotta high tail it out. I'm up next!"

"Yeah, see you." Rae watched as the skycraper haired man swaggered his way out and turned back to Raihiko. "Well, good luck. At least neither of us are facing 'You-know-who'. I suppose that's a relief, eh?"

Raihiko shrugged.

"I suppose, but i have to go against some Ryuzaki charactor wannabe." she grumped as she looked around realizing less and less people were around. "Are these... Matches... That fast? Want to go watch his? See how this is going to go?" she asked with a smile as she stood and stretched.

"Paul's match? Or Mr Psycho? I'm down to watch both if you are. This will be fun if you've never seen a match before. It'll give you a good feel too." She slowly moved her way towards the entrance and peered out. A match was just about to start. Bryan versus... Was that... "Lei Wulong!? Oh no! This is the worst match up, who the fuck thought this would be a good idea!?"

"Ok so... What does that mean?" she asked as she watched as the bell rang and the brute went in, not holding back as he immediately began beating on the guy. It was interesting watching the man defend himself.

Rae instantly got into it and was ducking and dodging as she watched the pair. "Oh OH NO! Shit!" It took a moment to register that she had been asked a question. "Hm? Oh! Well... The story is Lei has been out for his blood for years. Well, not really his blood. Something about Bryan's past. So the fact they paired these two is a bit silly."

She watched as Lei spiralled around, hugged the floor and jumped up as Bryan threw a powerful punch, then a kick.

He was out for blood. A maniacal smile graced his features as he threw punch after punch. He wanted this mans guts spilled across the arena. He let out a loud battle cry as he threw a kick up, successfully round housing the man across the room.

Lei landed on the floor about 10 feet away, groaning and growling as he struggled to get up, but Bryan wasnt going to let that happen. No. This was personal. He ran at the man, nearly jumping on him, knocking him back onto his back as he threw punch after punch anywhere and everywhere he could connect with above the shoulder line.

Raihiko watched in horror as the savaged man attacked the other... Lei he was called. This was madness. Were there no rules against this? O h wait. That's right. The only rule is no weapons. How silly of her to forget.

It didnt take long for the madman to subdue his opponent. Was he alive? He looked to be breathing, but he was pretty well banged up. Rai gulped loudly as the white haired man turned and headed right for them as people ran in to help the other fighter off the floor. Great.

Rae was still throwing air punches as she watched and letting out the odd 'ooh' and 'ahh'. Lei was battered and bruised as she had expected. She had seen Bryan fight plenty of times before, but something about seeing it all in person made the hairs on the back of her neck stand up. The round was over, he had won and she almost hadn't even registered that he was stomping thier way until he was almost a few feet away. "Oh fuck. I mean, uh..." She scooted to one side. The last thing she wanted was to end up like Wulong.

Rai had to admit that the young woman besides her was quite the animated one. She quickly moved out of the way, letting the behemoth of a man through.

Bryan growled an "outta my way" as he nearly bumped into the brunette that had dared to glare at him earlier.

"Well ladies." said paul as he stretched his arms up and cracked his neck and knuckles simultaniously, "That would be my cue." he said as he stepped forwards and looked back, finger gunning the both of them as he winked.

Rai rolled her eyes.

"I think i am next, actually." she said as she looked up at the board.

Had she been able to she'd have melded with the door frame as he growled his words. Alas, she couldn't, so had to clench her teeth and scrunch her eyes shut as he breezed past her, the scent of sweat and the blood on his knuckles rocketing up her nostrils. It wasn't until Paul spoke that she managed to shake herself free of the vision of being pummelled into gore.

"W-Well... Good luck, I guess. Though I kinda don't want you to win, since it might mean I'll have to face you further down the line."

Paul offered a wink. "Thanks for the vote of confidence, Missy!" WIth that, he was gone, off to face his opponent.

Rae turned to Raihiko and let out a small sigh. "I suppose I should find a training dummy. I didn't want to agree to sparr with Paul, but I do think I should get in some practice. Loosen up. As much as I'd like to watch Paul, I think I'll go do that while I have time. You can join me if you want, or you can stay and study Paul's fighting technique just in case."

Raihiko nodded. She certainly needed to warm up. Especially since she was next and she had just gotten off a plane only a few hours earlier.

She slowly made her way around the corner and to the right where another set of dummies sat. "Oh... Shit."

[eris0330]

Whalien 52 - Part 10

☽M. List☾ ; 1 // 2 // 3 // 4 // 5 // 6 // 7 // 8 // 9 // 10 // 11 [END]

☽Pairing☾ ; Jungkook | Reader

☽Genre☾ ; Angst | Fluff

☽Word Count☾ ; 3.4k

“Are you okay?”

Hani leaned over the counter, meting your gaunt face while counting the cash. A chocolate scent that matched the strands falling in slow motion upon the woodened counter, while tilting her head to align with yours. You have been closed in yourself the past week, trying not to reach out for your phone, whenever Jungkook called. You were mad at him. No, you ARE mad at him. He’s been trying to reach you since the encounter of his actions towards Jooheyon, but you didn’t let him. In fact, it hurt seeing his name dance cross the LED screen but shortly after, Nayeon would be texting about your whereabouts. Unfortunately, and luckily, they haven’t been able to meet despite the departure with Jungkook.

“Yeah I’m fine, why?”

“Come on Y/N… I’m your friend, even a stranger would have noticed your darkened expression” There was a slight doubt in her sentence, while you couldn’t quite respond to it. Her awkward poster waiting for an answer like a tiger on the hunt, you tried to compel whatever excuse laid in mind. Until, the entrance of the shop was opened by the acknowledged bell of a welcome.

“We’re closed, sorry.” Stating the obvious, you didn’t spare a look for whoever decided to bump in. As well, cursing over not locking the door as you should have done a decade before.

“Y/N, I think it’s for you” Hani’s voice was excited, yet contemplating on who was standing in the doorway. An aura of confidence and a nice smell of manhood swelled under your nose, making your hands shake. Your eyes slowly falling upon the tall figure, your excitement fell on the bottom of the pit.

“…Hey Jooheyon” A familiar smile awakened, walking further with his heavy black boots and skinny jeans. Asking Hani to take care of the money to be locked up in the safe, you walked away from the counter, demolishing the view of a ‘cashier and customer’ status.

“What are you doing here so late?” You couldn’t hide the disappointment for him, as you knew, Jooheyon has spent days trying to reach you whenever there wasn’t anyone besides him in class. Were you expecting someone else?

“You haven’t been coming to class lately, I got worried.” There wasn’t any change in his aura of confidence, as he shot another one of his deathly smiles. You couldn’t help, but mirror him.

“I’m sorry for troubling you, but I have decided to work here until everything gets settled.”

“I see that. Why don’t we talk about it over a late-night meal? You have probably been working all day, and you looked like someone who could eat something” Shooting a glance towards the back door, you knew Hani was eavesdropping as usual. Her hand gesturing you to take the invite, because without a doubt, all she wanted, was for you to get out of this shop and meet cute guys.

“Sure, why not.”

“You have been awfully quiet” Seated outside the food truck on an old green coloured bench, watching the couples walk by, trying to snug their hands together inside one’s pocket. You had barely touched the ramen that Jooheyon bought, excusing that it was still hot. But the steam rising from the plastic bowl, were slowly dying out into the night sky.

“I’m just a bit tired” You weren’t lying, but trying to keep your heavy eyelids open was already a struggle, even on top of trying to seem like a person without a heartache.

“Is it about Jungkook? When was the last time you two had contact?”

“Eight days, probably Nine by now” Twirling the soggy noodle with your metal chopsticks, you heard a significant sigh on the side.

“Let me guess. The silent treatment?” Jooheyon left out the obvious, trying to poke at your conscious about how horrible of an act it is.

“Maybe, I can’t get myself to reply any of his texts… It’s already bad enough that we got so involved in each other’s lives, and now I had a bitch flip because of him. It’s not right, for me… and him.” Finally deciding that the grumbling monster in your stomach needed to silence itself, you slurped the now very gross soggy noodles and the aftermath of it dissolving like nothing on your tongue.

“He still texts you?”

“Even calls”

“Do you know what that means Y/N?” At least the food was filling your stomach, but something about Jooheyon’s sudden smirk and aura of solving a mystery, bugged you slightly.

“No, clearly I don’t. Enlighten me?” You answered in a haste, slurping another gulp of noodles.

“He likes you”

“If you didn’t know by now Jooheyon, that Jungkook is a famous singer in a boy group which has millions of people drooling to just touch him once. There is no way, that out of everyone in the world, he chooses me. I’m not a main character in a fanfiction, thank you very much.” You snickered into the air with gritted teeth making him giggle of your remark of denial, trying to ease the moments.

“Come on, as if it isn’t obvious. Why aren’t you thrilled? I thought you liked him?” Jooheyon continued with the bickering of love, making an imaginary black pulse hover on your temple.

“I like him as A FRIEND” Even writing the word ‘friend’ into the air, didn’t make him stop comparing your feelings towards another man.

“Oh really? So, the pink tinted cheeks of yours, is just a weird habit every time I mention his name?” Shocked and noticing his low eyebrow wiggle in suggestion, you couldn’t help but smack his thigh of punishment. How dared he, read you like a children’s book.

“Okay, so what? Isn’t it normal to have a crush on someone that inspires them?” Jooheyon chewed on the remaining of his sandwich, before hitting right on the spot into the trashcan. The same sort of growl of confidence brawled in his throat, while shooting you a warm smile.

“You see, that’s true. Everyone adores their bias in a group, but here’s something sweetie. You aren’t just a fan to him, you’re his friend. A friend, that left him hanging with multiple voice messages and unanswered texts. Here’s reality, and it’s going to hit you, whether you like it or not. For months, you have been having this close intimate relationship-“

“Intimate???” Flushed over his words as if you have had phone sex with a guy, you tried to hide away the thought of that, it could have happened.

“Close friendship. Not actual sex related stuff, you pervert.” He continued, making you feel embarrassed and rather, exposed. Jooheyon only knew your background through what you have told him, but maybe he was smart enough to figure out everything.

“I get the idea, that you two switched phones by accident. But, here’s the deal. Jungkook is rich, he could get a new phone and basically get this number blocked or track it down, right? Well, looks like he didn’t and wants to continue talking to you.” Jooheyeon continued, as you slurped the last cold beef soup before tossing it into the same trash can, trying to ease the victory of downing at least a meal for the day.

“Why would he?” Seated back against the bench, with all ears open to what Jooheyon said.

“I’m coming to that. As any other person, they wouldn’t even bother trying to get it back. Who in their right mind, would trust a stranger with their phone, even a fan? No one. One thing is for sure, Jungkook has a huge interest for YOU. Why would he bother leaving messages and voice mails, knowing thousands of other chicks is ready for him? Because you, were the one that stole his heart.”

“Hold up. Stop the melodrama. I get it, okay?” You held a hand high to stop his preaching about stealing a guy’s heart, without even intending to. It all seemed unrealistic, but idealistic at the same time, as if the world was stuck between a fantasy and devouring dreams.

“No, you don’t Y/N. Do you see what you stopped, when the connection between you and Jungkook ended? You don’t come to college, the place you have always wanted to go. You can’t even get yourself to say how horrible it is, to let this guy wait for you, because of a single act. Jungkook isn’t like your mother, he isn’t just going to vanish because of your feelings. He WILL continue to wait for you, because love have no limited time when it’s first discovered.” His powerful words shot through your heart like an arrow, feeling every bit of sting and reality hitting as it promised. The tears formed in the corner of your eyes, drying away with a harsh movement. There was no doubt in Jooheyon’s eyes, that whatever words he sprouts in clarification, hurt your soul for each second.

“How do you know about my mother…?” The scene of your mother’s last words, with a single touch of goodbye and betrayal puts on repeat. Your lower lip quivering of shock, at the news of someone else, knowing your dark secret.

“I have lived here since I was a baby. It was just a couple of blocks away from where you lived with your family, and my parents told me the news about a young teen living by herself. Sending supplies to the house and even my father helped with your bills. You probably don’t remember me, since I went abroad for a few years after. But they kept updating me about your wellbeing. You stopped receiving help, because you told them you were okay now and moved out.” Remembering the shy boy behind a man’s back, there was no doubt, it was Jooheyon. Did they really do all of this, for you?

“You stopped getting help, because you feel like you don’t deserve it. But I think, someone is out there, trying his best to do what he can. Even, if it means to step over boundaries.” Putting his slender hand on yours, feeling every fibre of warmth cover the reptile skin of ice. His dark hollow eyes of comfort dragged you into despair of realisation, of what an absolute selfish idiot you were.

“I’m so sorry Jooheyon…” Tears of sorrow and warmth streamed down your face, offering your deepest feelings hidden behind the walls, that only one could break.

“I’m not the one, you should say sorry to.” Gesturing to the beautiful view of stars, your eyebrows knitted together in confusion before a gentle clap covered your shoulder.

“Listen to the voice mails, and give him a chance to talk. He won’t give up, trust me on that.” Taking a deep breath and a light thumb brushing away the tears. A warming smile as usual, before patting your lightly on the head like a child.

“I’ll be right over here, when you’re done. You’re not alone” Whispering of comfort leaving you behind on a bench like a lonely cat, you scanned his silhouette disappear between the dark shadows. Heart pounding like a horse on drugs, waiting for the right moment to scan the unanswered message of desperation. Jooheyon was right, that not only did Jungkook do something wrong, but he surely never gave up whatever drove your spirit. Not just one, but more than five messages was left in your voice mail, from the only man that made your heart skip a beat by just reading his name.

“You have six unchecked voice mails…. The first voice mail came on the 17th of July at 23:45….”

“Come o-“ Turning it off with the speed of light, you couldn’t get yourself to hear his deep voice as you remembered. Watching his videos on Twitter and Youtube, there was something about hearing his voice, only talking to you. Taking in a deep breath and exhaling while the foggy air released as a lit cigarette. This could take hours, but you didn’t have that much time. Gathering your confidence, you tried yet again, listening to every single message holding your own demons at bay.

“Come on Y/N… are you really giving me the silent treatment….?” How disappointing of the first message, which made you chuckle of how you were so afraid of just listening to messages like this. You didn’t understand why it was so important for Jooheyon to make you listen, when none so far, had given an impact. Deciding to delete it and continue to reach the rest of the messages, that was queuing up.

“Are you really that mad at me…? I wasn’t trying to make you upset. Call me back when you can…” There was a shaken voice and background noise of people talking. Even the echoing of his vocals made him seem confused and scared. It pulled your heart, to the point of not wanting to hear the rest of them.

“I can’t sleep. It’s been kind of boring, and manager keeps talking about this collaboration. He told me I seemed cold towards Nayeon… did you text her? I just need an update on what to do… There are still a few concerts to be held and I think my muscles are going to burst haha… you’re probably sleeping… Goodnight Y/N.” Was there more to your heartache, knowing you left him off to a night of no sleep. He probably would sleep, or so you convinced yourself while deleting this voice mail. Noticing your fingers shake in the process, not knowing what was happening inside your head.

“Still ignoring me…? It’s okay, I understand… but you should know I’m not the kind to give up that easily… When will I hear your voice again…?” Was that a tear? It was probably already there, listening to his shaken question, ravishing the world that you lived in, that you thought was reality.

“Lonely lonely lonely whale, like this, try calling once again~~ what do you think? Maybe my voice got a bit rusty after all these concerts… It’s been amazing like always, but it’s not the same when I’m alone in the hotel room. When will you call me back? Tonight? Tomorrow? Never…? I miss you Y/N… I’m going insane without you...” You smiled trying to ease the pain of sympathy that your feelings were the same as his, you missed him. Listening to every piece of Jungkook’s own confidence ravelling down, noticing how maybe his words were nothing but actual confessions of his feelings poured out in sorrow.

“Jungkook LOG 24th of July 2017. Do you like this idea?” This was something new, as if you were going through old videos of Bangtan bombs and even though you couldn’t see him, it was like he was right in front of you. His voice continued to speak in a calm tone and his witty character blooming through the speaker, letting you lean back against the bench rest.

“Normally I talk into a camera, as a note for myself… but I feel the need to let you hear it, properly. Maybe it’s too late, you might never call me back and we will depart soon…. It makes me want to cry, but I’m not that touchy haha. I just want to thank you, for keeping me in company, even though I was needy. I didn’t mean to make you upset, about Jooheyon. I just didn’t like the idea… that you would maybe like him more than me… I don’t like one-sided love, it’s horrible.”

“Don’t talk nonsense you fool…” You muttered biting on your lower lip as if it was bruising slightly of the pain, that couldn’t compare to your heart’s aching for Jungkook.

“Besides my members, they are like brothers. A family. But you? Something else. I think I should curse or thank Jimin for this… but I really like you Y/N. Not as a friend… more than that. It’s probably the worst way to get to know, but I can’t keep it a secret forever, when I know you’re only a call away… sort of…” His lips quiver of the sentence that released his feelings towards you, hit like a brick wall when crying. You couldn’t answer, knowing that he couldn’t hear, but the silence in the speaker was a faint sniff. Was he crying? You could hear his breathing settling to control and all you wanted, was to hug him and tell him you were right there.

“Silly, right? I thought it was in books that things like these happened, but I guess I’m wrong. I never told you about what happened that night? To put it simple, I will tell you when I see you…. GAAH I feel so stupid right now… I just want to see you… right now… Call me… please? I begging you..” Listening to the last records of his vocals confession, you thrilled to feel your heart become lighter. Your cheeks flushed and out of control, knowing that the guy your heart pounded for, was feeling the same. Was it insane? Probably, but at this point, you couldn’t care. It was like a dream, that your body flew in the clouds of baby blue and sunshine rising from the east. Drying away your tears, to tap along the LED screen to find his specific name. The sound of beeps holding on to every chord, that held your hopes high, to only wait in agony.

“Y/N…?” Your smiled brightened of the recognisable voice.

“Hey Jungkook…”

“You called me back… thank god…” A sigh of relief was muffling through the speaker, finding your own sticky hands trying to push out the right words.

“Look I’m-“ Jungkook was fast enough to catch of the creeping silence, not wanting your voice to disappear into the emptiness of his loneliness.

“No, Jungkook. I heard your voice mail, all of them actually.” You chuckled, but it was a mechanism to hold back your nervous giddy sentence. Trying to keep calm wasn’t easy, when there was need of gathering your courage.

“What did you think…?” You could tell by the noise of his own lips trembling and nibbling on the swollen bottom lip, in attempt to calm himself. Picking at the hem of your shirt, trying to sound right about situation, you needed to take in a deep breath, without screaming the answer.

“I missed you, a lot… To be honest… I was shocked, that an idol could feel the same about me, as I did with them…”

“So you like me too?!” Giggling of his fast remarks, clarified the butterflies flying around in the bottom of your stomach, only to realise that whatever Jungkook said or did, it would make your heart skip a beat and even to the point, it might stop it from beating.

“I do…”

“Jesus Christ, do you know how anxious I have been?? Realising I left my last voice mail…. I really believed I scared you away being a creep..” Jungkook could finally feel the burden on his shoulders release against the cold sheet in the hotel room, watching the sun set from his window.

“It was cute. I was more surprised that you started crying” You snickered, letting the deep air of ecstasy fill your lungs.

“I did not!”

“Sure, whatever makes you sleep at night” You missed hearing his exhausting laughter and reassurance that he’s close to you, or as close as he can be.

“Sooo, you want to see me again?” Jungkook questioned with a sight of hope, still remembering your angry texts of goodbye. Biting on your lip in the process of trying to seem witty as always, you couldn’t help but sound a little more excited than intended.

“Of course”

“Not right now, because I got to go! We’re planning for another concert and then we’re moving to our next location… I wish I could talk more with you-…” He trailed off taking in a deep breath, before you nodded along his sweet voice.

“-Can I call you later..?”

“Always.” You answered with a smile, crinkling your eyes in the joy of feeling your heart pound harder. If just, you could hear his. Saying goodbye was hard, but it’s easier, when you know than you will be talking soon again. With loud and clear steps to find Jooheyon leaning up against the cherry blossom tree, he only shot his significant warm smile, knowing what just happened.

“Thanks, Jooheyon” You whispered, walking alongside down the street to nearing your apartment. Patting your head like usual, finding you cuter and even closer after noticing, how familiar your size difference was.

“Any time Y/N.”

[kimamanitranslatesnovels]

Destruction Flag Otome v3c4pt2

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Volume 3, Chapter 4: My Life as a Captive Continues

Part 2: Pages 295 - 326

Topic: The bread from the light meal

“Hey, who made the bread that you gave me in that light meal earlier?”

“Ah, I bought that from a bakery in the outskirts of town, but I guess it wouldn’t fit the tastes of a high and mighty noble lady –”

“What? A bakery in the outskirts of town!? Where is it!? It was really good, so I want to go buy it myself sometime if I can!”

“… You’re really strange.”

Topic: My interests and talents

“I like taking care of my field.”

“Field? A flower field?”

“Mm, no, a vegetable field.”

“… Why?”

“Why? Because it’s fun.”

“…”

“I’m also sure that I’m the best at climbing trees and fishing.”

“… Are you really a noble lady?”

Topic: The other countries Rufus passed through before coming to this country

“Hey, you said that you passed through a lot of different countries before coming here, but how many countries have you been to exactly?”

“How many exactly? Well, I guess all of them in the area.”

“Hey, what kind of countries have you been to? I want to hear about them.”

“Alright, but I don’t think they’ll be the bright, sparkling stories you’re imagining. I travelled through the dark, dirty underside of society, after all. Do you still want to hear about them?”

“The underside of society!? A hardboiled world, right?!”

“‘Hard’, huh… and why are your eyes sparkling? What the hell are you expecting?”

************

I was very interested in Rufus’ stories – they were filled with things I had never even heard of before. As I begged him for more and more stories, a great deal of time passed before I even realized it.

“Wait, if you aren’t actually a butler, does that mean that Rufus is a fake name too?” I asked, wondering about it all of a sudden.

“Yeah, what would be the point my infiltration with dark magic if I used my real name?”

I guess that makes sense.

“Then what’s your real name?”

“I have plenty of names. I use whichever one suits me best at the time.”

Ooh, as expected from someone who lived their life in the hardboiled underside of society!

“What’s your original name?” I ask.

Rufus draws up close. Before I could react, Rufus’ face was right up in front of mine. Ooh, this is the first time I’ve seen his face from up close. I can really make out his lady-killer looks well from this distance.

“I don’t have an original name. After all, I’m not like you people – I don’t have parents. The first memories I have are of scavenging through garbage in the slums.”

Ooh, he even has a mole under his eye – a standard feature for a lady-killer. Amazing, this guy even beats out Keith, who’s a lady-killer archetype just like him. And those eyes I can see through his lenses…

“He-e-y. Why are you all frozen? Was it too shocking of a story for a young noble lady?”

“… Really pretty…”

“… What?”

“Your eyes! Your eyes are really pretty, they’re the colour of a clear sky.”

“…”

When I look at them up close, I can see that Rufus’ eyes are clear and blue like an unclouded sky. They were incredibly pretty, lit up by the sun that was gradually setting. I end up transfixed despite myself.

“… You’re really…”

“Hm?”

Rufus reaches out a hand to softly touch my cheek. It makes me feel a bit ticklish to be caressed by his pretty fingertips.

Were there crumbs on my cheek or something? And I feel like Rufus is slowly getting closer to my face… but is it just my imagination?

That’s when my stomach gives a gurgle. Even if I had been snacking, it was dinnertime. It looks like my stomach is telling me that it’s time to eat.

At the surprisingly loud sound, Rufus stops moving. His shoulders begin to tremble again. After a little while, the trembling dies down and he says ‘Shall I have people bring up dinner?’ with a laugh.

************

Yesterday, I had to move to a different room to have dinner, but today it seems it’s alright to eat in the room. At Rufus’ orders, the servants that had brought in the food yesterday brought dinner up to the room.

But since eating alone is generally dull, I invited Rufus to eat with me. He agreed readily.

“Oh yes, what is Lana doing? I don’t see her.”

Rufus is doing mostly everything that Lana did yesterday. I haven’t seen her since she brought in Selena last night.

“Ah, I’m just having her do a different job. Nothing to worry about.”

I see, that’s good. But I do want to talk with Lana again.

After that, I begged Rufus to tell me more about the foreign countries he went to.

He talked about towns where all the houses were made of stone, about a town with a river flowing through it where everyone travelled with boats, about the thrilling things he did where he worked. It was all incredibly fascinating.

“Ah, your stories of foreign countries are really interesting.”

“Your stories are interesting too. It’s a total waste that you’re a noble lady.”

That was a compliment, right? I assume that it’s a compliment and thank him.

“I’ve never travelled abroad, but hearing your stories makes me want to.”

I never took a step outside of Japan in my previous life too, so if possible, I want to travel outside of my country in this life.

“Ha ha, I’m starting to feel like I might like travelling around to all those different countries again, if it’s with you.”

I was surprised. My father’s overprotective, and my mother doesn’t approve of me going outside. She always says that ‘Our shame will become publicly known,” or something like that. I don’t really get it.

I always thought that travelling abroad was a pipe dream. So I was really happy to hear him say that.

“Really!? Then please, bring me with you next time!”

When I look at Rufus with sparkling eyes, he looks troubled. Huh? Oh no. I took him seriously, but I guess he might’ve just been being polite.

“I’m from a different world than you. There’s no way we could go together,” Rufus responds.

A different world?

“A different world? What are you talking about? You’re right in front of me.”

“…”

“We’re talking together and eating together. We’re in the same world, aren’t we?”

I look at Rufus in confusion – I have no idea what he’s saying. He still looks troubled. Hm? What’s the matter?

“You’re really a strange person. Alright, I get it. I’ll bring you with me next time.”

Yay! I got a travel buddy for going abroad!

“Alright, it’s a promise. Pinky promise!”

When I hold out my pinky to him, he looks confused.

Oh right, that’s not something people do in this world. Uh, how did people make promises in this world…?

Oh right! I head to the shelf that held the dress I wore when I arrived here. I stick my hand in one of its pockets. It’s there! I take it out and head back to Rufus.

“Here you go. I’ll give this to you as a symbol of our promise.”

There’s no such thing as pinky promises in this world, but there is something like that. You just give the other person something of yours.

“… This is a brooch?” Rufus asks, gazing at the item I placed in his hand.

It’s the brooch with a beautiful blue stone I had bought at the school festival at the urging of my friends.

“It’s a very pretty colour right? It’s even similar to your eye colour. The colour of a clue blue sky.”

“…”

I take the brooch from Rufus’ palm.

“And see, if you make the light hit it like this, it turns light blue. Just like my eyes.”

I place the brooch back onto Rufus��� palm.

“It becomes both your eye colour and mine… I think it’s perfect as a symbol of our promise.”

I thought it was a pretty good plan so I look towards Rufus expectantly. But he just looks genuinely troubled.

Wait, why? Was something wrong? As I was wondering, confused, suddenly, Rufus’ arm snakes out towards me and pulls me towards him. Before I realized it, I was pressed against his chest.

The next moment, he lifted up my legs as well – in the end, I was held up completely in the air.

And I feel like the way he’s carrying me is something I’ve only ever seen in manga and games… a princess carry.  

Wait, what, what is this? As I was panicking, for some reason, he took me to the bed and placed me down.

“When I’m with you, for some reason, my chest grows hot. It’s been a long time since I’ve felt this way.”

Huh? What’s with this position? Before I realized it, I was lying face-up on the bed. And Rufus was leaning over me. Rufus had ditched his glasses at some point too, and I could make out his blue eyes very clearly without the lenses.

Ah, his eyes are really pretty. For a moment, I forget about this situation that I don’t really understand and lose myself in his eyes.

“Hey, won’t you become mine?”

A clear sky blue – a very splendid colour.

“If you look at me with those sparkling eyes, I won’t be able to complain no matter what you do to me,” Rufus says, burying his face in my neck. I returned to my senses at the sensation of his breath on my skin.

W – what is with this situation… wait, could this be…!? Pinning me against the bed like this… could he be trying to make me sleep with his dark magic!?

I had completely let my guard down, thinking that he was a good person, but he was the mastermind behind my kidnapping, and he did say that he would make me disappear… at this rate, I’ll end up sleeping for days again!

Well, I guess I did feel really refreshed after being forced into a two-day sleep last year, but my body got all stiff. I’ll probably be fine if it’s just for another two days, but if it’s for numerous weeks, I’m worried that my muscles will deteriorate…

“Um, Rufus… wait a second… ow.”

When I try to open my mouth, a small jolt of pain shoots up my neck. I feel like it’s a sensation I’ve felt before… what is it? Was I bitten by a bug or something?

While I was distracted by the pain I felt, someone knocked loudly on the door.

“Rufus-sama, are you there?” Lana says in a loud voice.

Rufus, still draped over me, clicks his tongue in irritation.

“I’m busy,” Rufus says.

“It’s a very urgent matter,” Lana insists loudly, refusing to give up.

In the end, Rufus is the one to give in. He gets off of me and heads to the door.

“It was just getting to the good part,” he sighs, opening the door.

“An urgent letter has arrived for you,” Lana says with a smile.

“Where is it?” says Rufus, looking displeased. Lana’s smile doesn’t falter.

“I’ve prepared it in your room. I believe it’s for the best if you verify its contents as soon as possible,” says Lana. Rufus’ eyes widen.

“… You… could you be possibly… well, I guess it doesn’t matter anymore,” sighs Rufus deeply, leaving the room.

Lana enters the room.

“Katarina-sama, were you alright?” she asks, looking worried.

“I’m fine, though I think that he was about to cast some magic on me.”

“What, you’re worried about magic?”

“Huh? Yeah, he pushed me onto the bed, so I thought for sure that he was about to force me asleep with his magic. You really helped me out, Lana.”

“…”

Huh, why is Lana making such a weird face?

“Well, the most important thing is that you’re safe.”

For reason, she let out a deep sigh.

************

There was a lot I didn’t really understand, but well anyhow, my second night here arrived. I sunk into bed. I thought that I might not be able to sleep, since I slept past noon today, but I actually slept pretty normally. I’m really amazing!

But someone ended up visiting me in the middle of the night again.

“Katarina, Katarina.”

“Nngh.”

When I look towards the voice with my drowsy eyes, I see Rufus.

“Ah!”

In my surprise, I jerk up from the bed.

“Ha ha, you really do sleep a lot.”

“Wha – what do you want?” I ask cautiously, recalling what had happened right after dinner.

“I see that even you’ve being a bit cautious. But I won’t do anything anymore. After all, things are coming to a head.”

“To a head?”

“Yeah, I wouldn’t have minded running off to another country with you… but that’s a bit reckless, so never mind. We’d probably run into a lot of trouble thanks to my magic, so I figured I’ll just be a good boy and put you under protection instead.”

“What?”

Hm, I really don’t understand what he’s saying. What is he talking about? Another country? Protection?

“But then I won’t be able to see you anymore, so I came to see your face one last time,” says Rufus, reaching out a hand to brush my cheek. It feels ticklish again.

“… What do you mean by ‘one last time’…?”

Immediately after I ask that, I hear a very loud noise.

“Hm, faster than I expected,” Rufus says, taking his hand off of my cheek and stepping back.

Then, the door opens with a large bang, revealing…

“Huh? Why is everyone here…?”

Jared, Keith, Mary, Alan, Sophia, Nikol, Maria, Rafael… all my friends are standing there, grim expressions on their faces. And standing in front of them all is…

“…Lana?”

“Ah, I was calling myself that, but I’ll re-introduce myself now. I am Lahna Smith, of the Ministry of Magic. I am Rafael’s superior – I look forwards to working with you from now on.”

I was shocked. Lana wasn’t a maid working at this house?! She was Rafael’s superior?! At my befuddled state, Lana just smiles before turning to Rufus.

“Since you’re still here, I suppose you’ve made your decision?”

“Yes. I’ll go with all of you and reveal everything,” Rufus says agreeably, a meek expression on his face… though it did seem like his expression was fake.

“Yes, that’s a good attitude to have. Very well. Rufus Brode, you’re under arrest for the kidnapping of Lady Katarina Claes. For now, I’ll have you come with me to the Ministry.”

At Lana’s – or rather, Lahna’s – signal, people, likely from the Ministry, run up from behind her and surround Rufus. He lets them restrain him and they lead him out of the room.

I did have my guard up since he had nearly cast his magic on me… but his life philosophy was pretty cool, and his stories were pretty interesting… I didn’t know what to feel.

“U – um!”

I call out to Rufus without thinking. The people from the Ministry of Magic taking Rufus away stop still for me.

But I don’t know what else to say. What I want to say is…

That’s when –

“I’ll keep this until I keep my promise,” says Rufus, lifting his hand slightly. In his hand, the brooch with a blue stone I gave him twinkles in the light.

“Yes!” I respond cheerfully.

And so, Rufus was taken away to the Ministry of Magic.

************

My earliest memories are of living in the slums with my friends. I stole without thinking anything of it, and tricked people for a living. I had no parents and no name – I learned how to live from my slum buddies.

Our life suddenly changed when a certain man stepped into our territory.

He had come from the outside world. Despite his gangly appearance, he was pretty strong, and before we realized it, he was living near us.

That man, who had a name unlike us, knew of so many things.

There were many among us who didn’t think highly of people from the outside world, but I found his stories so fascinating. I was very attached to him.

Then one day, that man, when I said that I didn’t have a name, gave me the name ‘Sora’. When I asked where the name came from, he responded:

“Because your eyes are beautiful, like the blue sky.”

He laughed as he stared into my eyes.

My chest felt warm – it was a mysterious sensation I had never experienced before.

After that day, I called myself ‘Sora’, and visited that man even more than before.

That man didn’t only have stories of the outside world to tell me – he also taught me things like mathematics, reading, and writing. My knowledge of the world really expanded after meeting him. Before I realized it, my everyday life was more fun than it had been before.

“Hey, Sora. Don’t you hate it when I talk about the outside world?” he said one day.

“What are you saying all of a sudden?”

“Well, when I talk to all the other guys about the outside world, they always say that it gets them in a bad mood. You’re the only one that doesn’t say something like that.”

“Why would I get into a bad mood?”

“… That is… because when you learn of the outside world, you start to understand your own situation…”

“I don’t get it.”

“… That is, it must be tough to hear about everyone loved by their parents out in the outside world when you guys don’t even have names and are desperately trying to live on, one day at a time.”

“Ah, I see.”

“It doesn’t hurt, to hear such stories?”

“Mm… but well, other people are other people – I’m me. Other people’s lifestyles ain’t got nothin’ to do with me.”

“… Sora, there’s nothing that you don’t like about your life?”

“Of course not! I wanna sleep in a warm bed, and eat my fill! But what’s the point of getting jealous of some stranger and crying about how tough it all is? Besides, I don’t think I’m unlucky or anythin’. I’m living out every day safely, and I get to hear your interesting stories. Ain’t that enough?”

“… Sora, you’re really cool.”

“W – what are you saying out of nowhere?! Are you messin’ with me?”

“No, I’m not messing with you. The way you think is really cool. Please, keep on looking forwards in life - don’t get influenced by the people around you,” that man said, ruffling my hair. My cheeks reddened for some reason.

Shortly after, that man collapsed due to an illness…

He was very strong, but his body probably couldn’t deal with the unsanitary environment of the slums. He weakened by the day.

All my buddies told me to give up – they said that nothing could be done, that this happened a lot to people from the outside world. But I just couldn’t give up.

I’ve said goodbye to many of friends thanks to illnesses and injuries… but for reason, I just couldn’t give up on that man.

And so, I went around alone, stealing medicine from houses – and in the end, I was captured and sold to a slave trader.

I don’t know what happened to that man after that.

I was passed around a number of countries, learning much about how large the world was – and how dirty it was. Thanks to the reading, writing, and arithmetic I had learnt from that man, I was valued more highly than other slum brats.

However, there were times when I felt absolutely horrible, and wanted to curse the world. But every time I felt that way, I remembered what that man had told me.

“The way you think is really cool. Please, keep on looking forwards in life - don’t get influenced by the people around you.”

The words of that man, who was probably already dead, were the only things I ever took to heart.

I found myself in front of David Mason several years ago. Mason bought me because apparently I had magical power. Though all I could do was call up a small fire. It was a power I used to make my bed a little warmer back when I was living in the slums under a cold sky – I was very shocked that it was the same thing magic users used.

Since all the countries I had travelled through previously didn’t have a lot of magic users, no one had realized my talent.

But after buying me, Mason realized that my magical power was weaker than he had expected. He had probably thought that I was strong and had hoped to use it.

And so, despite being bought for my magical talent, I barely ever used it. Instead, I helped out the thugs and other slaves with dark, sketchy stuff like intimidating people and helping out with backroom deals.

But Mason’s place was pretty nice compared to the places I had lived before. Learning all those manners to help me with infiltration was annoying, but I was fed and was given a high-quality bed to sleep on. And since I was given high-quality clothing too, I was a huge hit with women – really, everything was great.

I thought that it might be nice to have my fill of this pleasant lifestyle. But such dreams were destined to break sooner or later – last year’s incident was the trigger.

An incident that occurred within a Marquis’ house – an incident where dark magic was involved.

Apparently this magic, which could manipulate people’s hearts and minds, was forbidden and hidden from the world at large… but someone must’ve revealed the secret.

Of course, such information was erased by powerful people up high… but since the small-fry villain Mason had dark dealings with the Marquis’ house in question, for some reason, he learned about dark magic.

And so, the small-fry villain who learned about dark magic and how to gain it, naturally wanted to obtain it.

In order to gain dark magic, a magic user needed to use a human sacrifice in a ritual. Mason, who had no magical power of his own, suddenly recalled my existence. And so, on Mason’s orders, I went about obtaining dark magic. I used an old man with no relatives that Mason had prepared for the ritual.

Honestly, I thought using a human sacrifice was pretty sketchy and I half-expected nothing to happen, but apparently that small-fry villain Mason’s info was accurate. The ritual succeeded and I obtained dark magic.

But my power of manipulation wasn’t all-powerful, and I learned it had many limits.

For one, I can’t make anyone have feelings they don’t have at all. I can’t make someone like someone that they don’t like, and same for hatred.

And, likely since I wasn’t that powerful of a magic user in the first place, I learned that my magic doesn’t really work that well on strong magic users.

Learning these truths, Mason got pissed.

David Mason is part of Prince Geoffrey’s faction and has a fair bit of influence. And since he’s probably been promised a fairly high position if Prince Geoffrey ascends the throne, he’s very desperate to see the first prince take the throne.

That was why he had me obtain dark magic.

With this power, he wanted to make Prince Geoffrey’s enemies, Prince Ian and Prince Jared, among others, to renounce their rights to the throne.

But after learning of my limitations, he realized that it was impossible.

Prince Ian and the other princes all were fairly magically gifted – it was very probable that my magic wouldn’t work on them.

For a while, he was just pissed that his original plan didn’t work out and took out his anger on me, but he calmed down eventually. Since he had finally obtained dark magic (though I was the one who actually obtained it), he somehow managed to squeeze out a plan despite his small brain. The plan he had thought up was the kidnapping plan I had carried out.

I was to target not Prince Ian, but his fiancée Selena Burke. It was well known that she was not very magically talented.

Using Selena, I would kidnap Katarina Claes - Prince Jared's fiancée who similarly had little talent in magic - and using them, I would have the princes both renounce their rights to the throne.

When everything was over, I would have Selena take all the blame, and thus the Burke house, who was a member of Prince Ian’s faction and wielded a fair bit of influence, would withdraw from society.

Honestly, David Mason isn’t a very smart man. From my perspective, compared to all the horrors I’ve seen in various places, he’s really just a small-fry villain.

But I did think that he had really tried his best to think up this plan… but it was sloppy here and there.

Well, if it did fail, I could always abandon Mason and run away, or if it succeeded, just cry and pretend that I was forced to do it.

Since I was born with a handsome face, if I look sad and shed a single tear or something, people’ll feel sorry for me. I’ve escaped countless hairy situations in that way.

So, I wear the high-quality clothing that had been prepared for me, put on the glasses that make me look like I know what I’m doing, and head to the Burke house.

And with all my preparations complete, I finally kidnap Katarina Claes, but…

T/N: As I was translating this, all I could think was ‘Holy, Katarina, surely you can’t be this dense?’

I was wrong. She was that dense.

Also, for anyone unaware - Sora means ‘Sky’ in Japanese. 

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[teentitansblackbird]

Chapter 3

Wayne Manor. July 15th, 2018. 1:25 PM.

The air was warm out in Gotham today. An uncommon experience, Damian thought, as even in the heat of summer there almost always seems to be an unnatural chill over the city. Perhaps it was just Damian's imagination, but he couldn't seem to recall a day when didn't feel cold in this town... or maybe it had something to do with the way he saw Gotham. Even compared to the mountains where he'd been brought up the first ten years of his life, Damian found Gotham City to be much more resistant, more inclined to fight against his presence. This didn't bother him, of course; when the city pushed him, all he really had to do was push back. But that's not how Damian saw things these days. These days it was much easier to look at the world and see the positives. Silver linings seemed to shine at the edge of every cloud. Damian wondered why that was as he knelt between the joined graves, reading the words carved into the stone.

Thomas Wayne. Beloved husband and father.

Martha Wayne. Beloved wife and mother.

Damian sighed as he placed a single rose at the door of each headstone. Despite his new outlook, Damian could never see any sort of good that came from death. Ironic, given his training in the innumerable ways to bring it about, but Damian had grown to detest any sort of violent death. Not to say he was averse to violence, of course; Damian still had no issue with bringing pain down into another for the sake of justice. But needless bloodshed? No. That was barbaric and disgraceful. If it hadn't been for the deaths of his grandparents, perhaps Damian would never have been born. But if they hadn't died, how much would have been different? How much could have been better?

"Damian?"

The youngest Wayne whipped around to see Raven and Alfred coming down the hill toward him. He smiled as he rose back to his feet, turning to greet them as he retreated from the graves. "Hello, Pennyworth. Raven."

"Your father has need of you in the Cave, Master Damian. I'm afraid Miss Kelley is in need of a proper sparring partner." Alfred cocked an eyebrow as he spoke, expecting some sort of snarky reaction from the boy.

"Excellent," Damian replied, cracking his neck as he smirked. "It's about time Kelley and I had our rematch." Alfred chuckled quietly; competitive as always.

"Just try not to get pinned too quickly this time, okay Damian?" Raven teased as she came closer.

"Hey, she got the drop on me last time!" Damian snipped back playfully as he bumped gently into her shoulder. "C'mon, you know that's not--"

"Oh."

Raven knelt down by the two graves before them, staring down at the foot of Thomas's headstone. "What... what kind of flower is this?"

"Oh, that's a..." Damian looked back down at the flower. "That's a Pennyworth Blue. Alfred breeds them."

"Indeed," the butler confirmed with pride. "One of my finest works."

"It's beautiful..." Raven whispered, reaching out and gently running her fingertips along the petals. "How do you do it?"

"Oh? Well, I suppose I could take you to see the garden if you'd like," Alfred responded, a sort of pep in his tired voice. "Not many of Master Bruce's children have shown interest in my gardening before, save for Master Jason."

"I'd love that," Raven said with a smile as she stood back up, turning and reaching out to take Alfred's hand. Damian couldn't help but notice the twinkle of light as her ring caught the sun at just the right angle... that was it. That's why it was so easy to see the positives these days. It all came down to her.

Wayne Manor. April 22nd, 2028. 7:43 PM.

It was a bittersweet feeling, Damian thought, looking down at the grave now placed beside that of his grandparents. It was a position he'd never really expected to find himself in that, while not at all that surprising considering the man's age, still came as a shock when he finally passed. Damian let out a sigh as he knelt down, putting a hand on the headstone as he reads the words carved in the granite slab.

Alfred Thaddeus Crane Pennyworth. Loving father, loyal friend.

The youngest Wayne paused for a moment, reflecting on the life Pennyworth had led. Despite not being a Wayne by blood, Alfred was more of a grandfather to Damian than Ra's al Ghul ever was. When his father couldn't be there, Alfred was. When he and Batman were heated over a case or some other dispute, Alfred stepped in as the voice of reason. Of course Alfred had saved Damian's life on the operating table on more occasions than either of them ever bothered to keep count, but more than that, Alfred played a major role in ensuring that that life was worth living. Alfred was... Alfred was the best of all of them.

Damian jumped a bit when he felt his wife's hand light on his shoulder. He looked up to see her smiling somberly down at him as he knelt beside him, placing a single blue rose on the grave. The old caretaker had taught Raven how to tend to a proper garden a few years before he had passed, and while it may not have come as naturally to her as it did to him, she still did well at breeding Pennyworth Blues the way he had before. They'd quickly become her favorite flower after Damian showed them to her, and she had one from her wedding bouquet pressed in a diary at home.

"Bruce said to come on inside," Raven said quietly, her gaze cast over her Damian. "It's about time to eat."

"Yeah..." Damian replied softly. "Just thought I should say thanks."

...

"So Damian." Bruce leaned over his coffee in his chair by the fireplace. "How did Tommy handle his first patrol?"

"He's a natural," Damian leaned back in his seat, smiling back at his father. "Takes orders like a soldier, and fights every bit as smart as the best of them. You would have been so proud of him."

The older Wayne chuckled, throwing an eyebrow up in response. "Sounds like it went far better than yours."

"Hey!" Damian called, a wry smile on his face. "It's not my fault mother was insane!"

"Ha! Maybe not," Bruce shot back, "but it's definitely your fault I am!"

"You say that. But last I checked, you were dressed like a giant bat and attacking gangbangers long before you ever knew about Damian." The two turned as Raven came into the room, a cup of Earl Grey in her hand. Damian stood, putting his arm around her waist as she walked in.

"Dad," the half-demon continued, "are you sure you don't need us to move back into the house with you? Y'know, help look after you and everything."

"I'm fine, Raven. I promise." The old man let out a low grunt as he rose to his feet. "If it'll make you two feel better, maybe I'll get a dog or something to keep me company. But you two have enough to worry about as it is. What, with the company every day, and the criminals every night..." Bruce glanced at Raven with a smirk. "And pretty soon you'll have one of your own to take care of."

Both of the younger Leaguers froze, shocked by their mentor's words. Raven dropped her tea, the hot drink spilling over the rug.

Damian looked down as a splash of liquid hit his loafers. "... Honey, come on. That rug is expensive."

Raven shot Damian a glare in response. "I thought we were gonna tell him together!"

"What? I didn't say anything!" The youngest Wayne threw his hands up, gesturing frantically at his father. "He just, I dunno, he just--"

"Come on, Raven, I deserve some credit!" Bruce laughed as he crossed his arms. "You think I'm not old enough to tell when someone knows they're pregnant? You've been glowing since you walked in the door."

"Well you totally missed it when Barbara was pregnant!" Damian shot back, his mouth pulling into a grin.

"I've learned a thing or two since then," Bruce replied as he walked forward, putting his arms around the both of them. "Either way, I couldn't be more proud of you both. You're going to be wonderful parents."

Raven smiled, closing her eyes as she pulled the two Batmen in close. "Thanks, Dad."

...

As the fire began to die down, Bruce let out a low hum from his chair. It had been a good day; every day one of his children came home was. With Dick always working at the GCPD, Jason on the road with Harper and Kori, Cass studying abroad, Tim always in orbit on the Watchtower, and Damian running the company... well, it was hard to find time to check in on the old man. Bruce understood that. It just made the occasional visit that much more special. And today's visit was no different. Another grandchild... this made two. Bruce smirked; to be honest, he was surprised this hadn't happened sooner. But it was happening at last... they'd talked about names, and it made the old Wayne smile to hear what they'd decided on. Thaddeus or Angela. One for Alfred, one for Arella.

"Wouldn't it have been sweeter if they named it Bruce, though?"

Bruce lurched forward as swiftly as his tired old body let him out of his seat and swung his head around to see an old woman standing in the hallway, a familiar deadpan stare on her face.

"Waller..." Bruce let out a sigh. "Who let you in here?"

"I did," Amanda Waller replied. "I need to have a word with you about your old job."

"I ought to have you arrested for breaking and entering..." Bruce stood up straight, crossing his arms as he stared down his uninvited guest. "But I suppose charges against you don't exactly stick, do they?"

"I work for the government, Mr. Wayne," Waller replied, an eyebrow cocked. "People haven't been able to make things stick to us since the Luthor administration."

"Was is it you want, Amanda?" Bruce's eyes continued to bore into the woman, who remained unfazed.

"Let me be clear here. Your son is doing a fine job filling in for you." Waller took a step forward, the smoldering embers in the fireplace casting a faint light over her grim visage. "But we need to put together another contingency plan nonetheless."

"What is that supposed to mean?" Bruce raised an eyebrow of his own.

"Let's be frank, Mr. Wayne. You're running out of time." Amanda continued forward, squinting up at the old man as she advanced. "And once you're gone, we need to be ready with something to fill that gap. My people have a plan for that."

Bruce was silent for a moment before responding. "... what did you have in mind?"

Amanda smiled. "You may need to come to DC with us, Mr. Wayne. Something like what we have planned is a bit... beyond simple words."

[the-scot-blog1]

Scrolling through Twitter one afternoon, I stumbled upon an amazing little feature by blogger Liam McNally – he had posted a text post with a number of different film titles from each year of his life. Bloody brilliant.

So I’ve decided to give it a go. I’ve been on this wonderful planet for almost 19 years now, and although I wasn’t alive for the release of Jurassic Park, there have been a fair few phenomenal films in my lifetime.

This is my longest post to date – I don’t know whether to laugh or cry. (2730 words – bloody hell).

  1998: Pleasantville

Oh my God. I didn’t realise how difficult this post was until I searched ‘1998 films’ into Google. The Trueman Show, Saving Private Ryan and The Wedding Singer all in the one year? God, anyone alive and kicking back then must have been having the best year of their lives.

But despite the 10 minute long decision process, I’ve decided on Pleasantville. I watched it when I was very young and hadn’t ever worn a bra, much less watched anything like that bath scene. Despite my mortified eyes however, the film will always be one of my favourites. I remember seeing the main character for the first time and just constantly thinking god, this is a weird film for Spiderman and Elle Woods to be in.

  1999: 10 Things I Hate About You

Again, this year is bloody difficult. The Iron Giant, The Mummy and Toy Story 2 – they just don’t make films like them anymore. Although I wasn’t a fan of Star Wars Episode 1 – it has to be one of my least favourites. Anyway.

10 Things I Hate About You was one of the first chick-flicks I ever watched. I knew Heath Ledger as ‘the strangely cute singing guy from that movie’ before I knew him as the Joker. I felt like I related to Kat – I wasn’t big on getting a boyfriend, and I was pretty much destined to be a wee bit strange since birth. Plus her name is so cool.

  2000: X-Men

At the time of watching, I was right into Harry Potter. I loved the idea of special schools dedicated to supernatural people – it made my own secondary school even more boring. I’d often just sit in class and daydream about being able to fly or have the ability to imitate people.

But in all honesty, the one person I was most envious of was Quicksilver. And not because I wanted to save the world or any of that pish. No. When I sat in my third year physics class, the smells from the cafeteria always decided to sneak up the vent and attack my nostrils. I would get so unbelievably hungry, and my stomach would always tell my classmates just that. So I used to daydream about running faster than time, sprinting down into the dining hall, grabbing a steaming hot spicy chicken panini (and maybe some soup, if I could manage) and munching it before heading back up to class. Yeah – I wanted superpowers so I could eat my lunch early.

  2001: The Princess Diaries

AH. I’ve got a feeling film directors are deliberately messing with me right now. Legit, I had a look at the films from 2001, and I was floored. What an amazing year. The first Harry Potter movie came out this year – the beginning of an absolute era. Shrek debuted as well – but I was always slightly offended when people heard my Scottish accent and compared me to a giant green ogre when I travelled abroad. The first Lord of the Rings film came out as well – see what I mean about them messing with me?

But despite all of my favourite film franchises beginning in this year, I gotta say, the Anne Hathaway/Julie Andrews combo that is The Princess Diaries absolutely stole my heart. I had never related to a character more – I had frizzy hair, buck teeth, oversized glasses and a tendency to prioritise spending time with my cat over hanging out with real-life friends. So when she went through her beautiful princess transformation, I was floored. I mean, I’m still waiting for that to officially happen, but I’m still holding out hope that I have a long lost relative that’s gonna tell me I’m a princess (no, not you mum).

  2002: The Pianist

Originally, I had written the first Spiderman as my favourite film of 2002. But that quickly changed.

The first time I watched The Pianist, I was 13 years old in a stuffy history classroom. I still hold the belief that this was definitely not the right time to watch this film. It felt as though my teacher didn’t have any material to convey how horrific the Holocaust really was, and so instead she stuck on one of the most distressing and hauntingly beautiful films of all time. I didn’t fully appreciate it back then – I cried when I watched the horrors that took place in the ghettos, and got even more upset when immature people around me started to laugh.

But I watched it for a second time a few years later. Although I cried again, I gained a much deeper understanding of the film. I still listen to the soundtrack when I want to write a particularly moving or sad chapter of a book. The film has such a disgusting beauty to it, it is astounding – it makes me question my morals when I say it is one of my favourite films.

  2003: Peter Pan

Again, there were so many amazing films this year – I can’t explain my guilt at not choosing Finding Nemo or the last instalment of the Lord of the Rings trilogy.

But I found my first love in the live-action remake of Peter Pan. Just a few years after it was released, I found myself watching it time and time again. I was young, and there was a boy with messy hair and a fairy to keep him company. Honestly, I was head over heels. I grew to absolutely despise Wendy Darling. How dare she take away my Peter, with her stupid bow and annoying accent. And the fact that Lucius Malfoy was Captain Hook just made it that little bit better.

  2004: Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban

You’re lying if you say that this isn’t one of your favourite films.

Again, it was tricky not choosing The Incredibles or Mean Girls – even The Notebook made it to my shortlist. But the way the Weasley twin’s hair sat and the introduction of the marauders just made my life complete. Except for Pettigrew. Fuck you, Pettigrew. I’d read the book before I saw the film, and while I was slightly disappointed with the previous two, I didn’t stop talking about PoA for months. In fact, I still talk about it. It’s great.

  2005: Sky High

This year was going to be beautifully simple – I absolutely love Star Wars Episode III. In fact, it was possibly the only film I was certain of when I started this post. But, never the less, I looked at the list of 2005 films anyway, and was reminded of the best thing I’ve ever watched. Ever.

Remember earlier in the post when I said that I frickin LOVE schools for supernatural people? WELL HERE WE GO AGAIN. I watched Sky High recently with my friend Ross, and even although the acting was abysmal and my cringe levels were off the chart, I couldn’t help but smile. As if the flying school bus wasn’t enough, the euphoria I felt when Will and Warren won Save the Citizen was something I don’t think I’ll ever feel again.

  2006: Pan’s Labyrinth

I feel like if I choose any film other than this, my Spanish teacher would kill me. Again, it’s another film that we watched at way too young an age in my opinion. Sure, it looks all mystical with fairies and creepy monsters with eyeball hands, but it has this underlying story-line of the horrors of war and escapism that you can’t fully understand until you’re a bit older.

I watched it again when I was 17 and studying Advanced Higher Spanish, and knew the film as ‘El Laberinto del Fauno’. I could go on for 20 minutes about this film and its director (which I did by the way, in the final exam).

  2007: Ratatouille

WHAT A FILM BTW. I’ve always loved Disney – my sister and I would spend nights staying up way past our 8pm bedtime watching Aladdin and Peter Pan, with a fair few stolen After Eight mints from my mum’s bedroom too. This film just completely blew me away – the animation was new and cool and it was set in PARIS.

Even now, ten years later (omg ten years wtf) I still think about the scene where Remy combines the cheese and grapes, and little fireworks and swirls form in his mind. I once ate a McDonald’s chip and then took a sip of my strawberry milkshake, and legit I’m pretty sure that’s what happened in my mind.

  2008: The Chronicles of Narnia – Prince Caspian

Enter stage left – my second love. At the age of nine, Prince Caspian had everything I could ever want in a guy (or so I thought). He had a sword, long hair, an accent I had never heard before and he fought Peter Pevensie (I seem to hate a whole lot of Peters).

I thought it was the coolest combination of Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter, and it was while watching this that I began to have a crisis about my true Hogwarts house. I had always thought myself a Gryffindor – I had the scarf, the pens and the egotistical ‘I’m-better-than-you’ attitude that all young Gryffs seem to adopt. But I found myself siding with Edmund Pevensie about a whole lot of things. I didn’t fully accept Slytherin as my true house till a good few years later.

  2009: Star Trek

I watched Star Trek before I even touched Star Wars, and I was absolutely hooked. It was what introduced me to science fiction, really. After Star Trek, I moved onto Doctor Who, and although I couldn’t really get into the Star Trek TV series, I found my love of sci-fi growing.

It was my love of Star Trek that caused me to accidentally find Star Wars. My brother would constantly go on about C3PO and lightsabers, and I decided very early on that it wasn’t for me. But after trying (and failing) to find Star Trek online, I accidentally found Star Wars instead, and thus began my love of the Skywalkers and giant wookies named Chewy.

  2010: How To Train Your Dragon

Other than Aladdin, Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III was one of my first (of many) cartoon crushes. I thought he was the most adorable lil guy ever – he was clumsy, dorky, and absolutely loved animals. He was perfect. I thought the animation was absolutely incredible, and the Scottish accents were just a bonus. I much preferred being compared to Gerard Butler than a green ogre, in all honesty.

And don’t even get me started on how he looked in How To Train Your Dragon 2 – oaft.

  2011: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part Two

HPDHP2 is right up there with the Prisoner of Azkaban. I remember heading to the midnight release of the last Harry Potter book – I was decked out in a Scream robe that we’d stitched a Gryffindor badge onto, with curly hair that reached my shoulders. And yes, I won the costume contest. But I remember staying up that night and reading the book until 7am, and having to head to school the next day without a wink of sleep. And yet I didn’t care – I had just finished the last book in a series that completely shaped my childhood.

So when the movie hit the cinema screens, I was praying that I wouldn’t be disappointed like I was with some of the others. And apparently, my prayers were answered. Even although the Deathly Hallows is split into two parts, I always consider them the one film. And it’s most certainly my favourite.

  2012: The Perks of Being a Wallflower

This film really got to me. I bundled up in warm clothes to see it in the cinema with my friend Ailish, and it was the first ever film I had cried at. I’d read the book before hand and cried my eyes out, but the severity and meaning of the story didn’t hit me until I watched the film. Logan Lerman and Emma Watson were two of my favourite stars at the time: I knew Emma from Harry Potter obviously, whilst Logan stole my heart as Percy Jackson.

But what struck me most was the way I related to these characters. I often found myself standing next to the wall in school dances, watching people having a good time but being physically incapable of joining in – it was as if my feet were constantly glued to the floor. It was comforting to know that I wasn’t alone in this, and it lead to me being able to open up to my guidance teacher about my struggles with anxiety.

I also wrote about the original book in my piece ’13 books to help get over a break up’ – check it out.

2013: The Hobbit – The Desolation of Smaug

When the making of the Hobbit was first announced, I was ecstatic. But my excitement somewhat wavered when I heard they were turning into three films. It was a small book – tiny in comparison to the three Lord of the Rings texts – how on earth would they stretch this wonderfully small work into three different films?

And yet somehow, they managed it, and subsequently made one of my favourite films of all time. Why, you ask? The barrel scene. 

2014: Guardians of the Galaxy

Not gonna lie, this one was a toss up between the hilarious Chris Pratt and the absolutely adorable Baymax. But, as much as I love Disney’s tale of superpowers and love therapy in Big Hero 6, it didn’t win this year for me. The best thing about the film is without a doubt the soundtrack – even four years later, I still listen to it when I wanna get psyched.

I wanted to cosplay as Gamora for last year’s MCM Comic Con in Glasgow so bad, but then I realised that I’d more than likely sweat off the green body paint and the leather would more than likely get quite uncomfortable.

2015: Star Wars – The Force Awakens

Up until 2015, I was losing interest in Star Wars. I’d watched the films countless times, but as much as I adored them, I couldn’t stop thinking about the shabby effects. So when Finn, Poe and Rey lit up my local cinema screen in December 2015, it was as if I was born again. I suddenly dived back into the world of lightsabers and gun-wielding Wookies, and I genuinely haven’t looked back since.

And although I cried my eyes out when that thing happened, I agreed with it – it was about time.

2016: Finding Dory

I actually travelled Australia for a month last year – I left school and just decided to get away from everything and everyone for a little while. So after I met my brother and we began to explore Sydney, we decided what better place to watch the latest instalment in Finding Nemo than the place where it’s set??

I was slightly disappointed to find out that Nemo and Dory did not, in fact, stay in Sydney for the duration of the film, but even so – it was just amazing.

I was going to write a segment for 2017 but then I realised – I legit haven’t watched any new releases yet. I’ve simply not had any time. And yes, that means that I haven’t even watched the new Beauty and the Beast. For shame.

But even although I haven’t watched anything yet, there are tonnes of films that I’m looking forward to – Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2, Spiderman Homecoming, and Star Wars: The Last Jedi to name a few.

Hey, maybe I’ll revisit this post at the end of the year and add in my favourite film.

I’m tagging the fantastic Emily and Lucie in the ‘Film for every year of my life’ tag.

What are your most loved films from these years? Do we share any favourites? Or do you think my choices are just downright wrong? Let me know!

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18 films in 18 years: My favourite stories since I was born was originally published on Ellan

[zachthevagabond]

Portugal Recap

Thursday January 31, 2019 [better late than never!]

As promised, here is a recap of what I would say was the most enjoyable trip I’ve done this year in Europe. Portugal --just wow. It was one of the most beautiful countries I think I’ve ever visited, and I will definitely be returning some day soon. 

Thursday: goodbye Luxembourg, and hello sun and food 

Despite a delayed train that was moving slow enough to be going backwards, Taylor and I arrived in Luxembourg with more than enough time to hit up the city’s infamous Pizza Hut before heading to the airport. What’s on the menu? Nothing but the usual for us: cheesy breadsticks and a medium pepperoni lovers pizza with stuffed cheesy crust. Can you say 3,000 calories? After finishing dinner, we walked to the bus stop towards the airport. Do you think that burned off at least an eighth of a single breadstick? 

This was my first time in the Luxembourg City airport, and I wasn’t all too surprised to find it completely dead and bizarre (reminiscent of Luxembourg City itself on a weeknight in winter). It was all good and dandy until Taylor was pulled aside and groped after setting off the beeper while walking through the metal detector. We’re still not sure why it happened, but I had a good cackle while collecting my items and watching her get felt up by two Luxembourgish security guards with her hands in the air. Honestly, she’s probably the last person on EARTH I would think to pull aside to check. Between her wavy Jewish hair and blue eyes, I think she’s the least-threatening person I’ve ever seen in my life. 

What would be a two hour airport wait without a glass of wine and witnessing a middle-aged woman carry around a life-size toddler doll? You can’t make this up if you tried. This woman cradled this doll, walked with it, and even looked us in the f*$^#(@ eyes as she rubbed it’s neck. Probably one of the strangest things I’ve ever seen in an airport. With only five minutes to board, I ran to the bathroom to pee before getting back in the boarding line with Taylor. Am I the only traveler out there who still gets butterflies of excitement/anxiety whenever I board a plane?

Running back to the gate, Taylor and I awaited our boarding opportunity. She went up to the agent before I did, and breezily scanned directly through to the other side. My ticket, of course, was not “found in the system.” They pulled me aside, and a kind flight attendant explained that she had to manually enter in my passport number. Kind of strange for the person who booked the tickets, but OK. Just my luck.

As I finally boarded, I passed Taylor in row five of the plane as I fought my way back to row thirty-two. Again, why is the person who booked the tickets getting all of this good luck?! While initially I had a middle seat, a French couple asked if I could trade seats with them so that they could sit together. I happily agreed, and won myself an aisle seat. “The first win of the trip!” I thought to myself. For the remainder of the flight, I read and listened to music tranquilly while Taylor was up in row five between two very affectionate lesbians. Taylor quotes, “It was a flight of true love around me: completed with lesbian leg wrestling and woman-on-woman kissing fully and all over each other.” What we didn’t know at this time was that this wouldn’t be Taylor’s last lesbian experience in Portugal...

Upon arriving, we ordered an Uber that never came to our pickup location. Wonderful. Finally, we decided to abandon the app and call a taxi. It all worked out for the best, as the taxi was actually two euros cheaper than the uber would have costs us. As we arrived to our Air B&B, we found a bottle of dry red Portuguese wine left for us by Adrian and Adriana, our hosts. What a classy couple! We stayed in and enjoyed the wine before heading out to explore a bit and find dinner. 

Friday: sun and food and food and sun 

We woke up at around eleven hungry and ready to explore. Naturally, we were thinking Brunch; and found an online recommendation from our Air B&B hosts for a spot about fifteen minutes away from the apartment. We both ordered brunch pancakes, which were essentially buttermilk pancakes with bacon and a fried egg on top. YUM. Before finishing our meal, we were blessed with the presence of a Portuguese street juggler who announced to the outdoor patio that he “wasn’t interested in tips” but “just that we paid attention.” After everyone continued talking and eating in peace, he went on his way without trying to pass his hat. I could’t help but feel bad for the guy, but his “juggling” show consisted of him stroking an oversized marble while making extremely uncomfortable eye contact. I can’t say I wasn’t relieved when he [literally] packed his marbles and left. 

We wandered down the winding and hilly streets of Lisbon to the water. We took a seat and looked out at the Atlantic while feeling the sun for the first time in months. It was one of those moments where you don’t even have to talk to your travel companion to explain what you’re feeling. “How f@#$%^& lucky are we that this is our life?!” was definitely at the forefront of both of our minds.

Wanting to stay in the sun but properly hydrate ourselves, we found ourself at the Museum of Beer of Lisbon. Finding a table on the patio, we both ordered small beers. “A small?! You don’t want a large? Smalls are for girls!” the waiter taunted me. “Yeah, no, a small please,” I replied, completely indifferent to his heckling. 

After our beers and a little sobremesa, we hailed a taxi to Belém. We saw the famous tower/castle thing of Belém as well as witnessed an Asian grandpa try to bust in the castle for free ---all while ripping ass three feet away from us. Again, you can’t make this Sh*^ up!

After touring the castle, we decided we needed yet another little something to recharge our tiring legs. We headed to the original home of pastéis, a Portuguese dessert specialty. It’s basically an egg custard that’s garnished with powdered sugar and cinnamon. It was delicious, and I could’ve eaten about fifteen of them in one single sitting. Before leaving, we noticed a small open motorcycle taxi (called a Tuk Tuk) sitting right in front of our table. Feeling like the driver, who we soon learned was named Ricardo, was put in front of our table by God himself, we decided that the “very special price” of 15 euros back to the apartment would be worth it. To this day, that ride home on the Atlantic in sunny Portugal was one of the most memorable things I’ve seen abroad.

After coming back to the apartment and having a two-hour siesta, we decided it was time for some dinner. We agreed on Lisbon’s famous Time Out Market. It’s a large outdoor eating venue with some of the best-rated restaurants in the entire city. Naturally, we settled on a burger joint that had the best burger and fries I’ve ever experienced on this side of the Atlantic. YUM. 

Shortly after finding a seat with our burger and fries in hand, Taylor and I noticed a couple across the table that looked MISERABLE. They weren’t speaking, looking at each other, or interested in anything else than their miserableness. After hearing them speak English, we broke the ice and asked them how their food was, where they’re originally from., etc. Fifteen minutes an countless travel stories later, the couple left grinning and holding hands. Taylor and I like to think that we saved their honeymoon. I think I definitely deserve to have their first son named Zachary in my honor.

After heading back home and finishing the bottle of red wine, Taylor and I hit the bars. Lisbon knows how to party, let’s leave it at that. [I’d give you more juicy information, but my grandma is reading this -love you Gram!!] 

If the party wasn’t already good enough, Taylor and I were approached by two Brazilians: Barb and Euginio. My Portuguese may have been better than their English, if that gives you an idea of how awkward this conversation was. After exchanging basic information about ourselves, we learned that they are masters students in law who are becoming judges??? I put the question marks because to this day, Taylor and I have no clue what they are studying and/or whether or not they are judges? Or being judged in their masters program? We will never quite know.

Shortly after meeting them, things got a little freaky. Barbara took a very special liking to Taylor, and asked her if she’d ever been with a woman. Not sure what to say, Taylor replied, “Ummm..yeah, no. It’s not my thing.” In retrospect, we decided she should have boldly said “Yeah, many times. I prefer men.” Regardless, Barbra was upset that Taylor had never tried anything with a woman, and proceeded to ask if she could kiss her on the cheek. This was one of those moments that you want to intervene to save your friend, but are choking on your own tongue trying to not laugh your ass off at what is happening before your eyes.

Frigid in fear, Taylor responded, “I mean, I guess” to find Barb lean over and kiss her on the cheek. “You’re so warm!” Barb said. “I mean, yeah, it’s the alcohol.” Minutes later, I very publicly reminded Taylor that we “had to be up super early” for our imaginary flight tomorrow morning. We ran out of that bar faster than Barb and Euginio could blink their browned Brazilian eyes. Taylor came here for a year of new adventure, and now she can say she’s officially had a Brazilian girlfriend. LOL!

Saturday & Sunday: Explore eat explore eat eat eat

Saturday morning, we woke up at around noon and headed out to brunch [yet again.] This time, we walked to a different part of the city. I met up with my old friend Charis, a German medical student that I met in Montpellier. She is now living in Lithuania studying medicine. How strange it is to see someone after two years and be able to continue your conversation like you’d just seen them last week! The joys of traveling. 

Following our brunch and catch-up with Charis, Taylor and I adventured around Lisbon before heading home for a mid-day siesta. After one last dinner at the burger joint and brunch the following morning, we found ourselves boarding a plan back home on Sunday in no time. “Back to the cold!” we thought. 

Portugal will always be remembered by Taylor and I as the mid-January 2019 trip of burgers, endless steps to climb around the hilly city, and of course, lessssssssbians.