#yes i am a music addict why do you ask

[hifimuses]

What song is stuck in your head right now?

@medjedrphub / Munday Meme

(OHH THIS IS LIKE ASKING TO PICK MY HAVE A FAVORITE CHILD! Even if it's just one I'm listening to now. Here are just some, under the cut.)

[leviismybby]

Birthday wish

Levi Ackerman x fem!reader

Nsfw 18+, mdni, happy birthday to Levi and Merry Christmas everyone!

Levi didn't wish for many things in life, he wasn't selfish enough to do so. The moment he blew out that candle, everyone around him cheered, he was grateful for the effort others put in to make his birthday memorable but he hated it. It wasn't for him, all the gifts, all the noise, it wasn't for him at all. His eyes closed for a second, he probably won't wish for anything, he didn't last year or the year before that, why would this year be different? But this time, he did wish for something, he wished for you. He knew better than anyone that he shouldn't, it wasn't the right time or the right place for such distractions yet you managed to crawl so deep init his mind that he is able to see you anytime he closes his eyes.

He wished for your body to be pressed against his, his lips making his way down your body. You smelled so good, Levi could recognize your smell anywhere. His hands caressed your thigh gently, hands going up your skirt more and more. Your moans are music to his ears, it's a sound he wouldn't mind repeating over and over again. "Can I?" His voice is hoarse, dripping with desire and hunger for you. "Yes." As soon as your soft voice permits him, Levi pulls your shirt over your head, your upper body exposed to his hungry gaze. He doesn't waste a second before his lips are nipping and kissing at your exposed shoulders and collarbones.

You moan as his lips move down to your breasts, he bites into the plush skin, leaving a mark behind. This was all he wanted. You sitting on his lap like this, he wouldn't ask for anything more. Levi takes your bra off, his hands grab your hips, grinding you on his erection. "Fuck..." He growls before taking your nipple into his mouth and sucking eagerly. The noises you're letting out just fire him up more, you were so sesntvie to his touch, he loved it. His mouth moved onto your other nipple as his hands traveled to your ass, squeezing it as you grinded on his cock.

The skirt you wore irritated Levi, it was in the way and he couldn't wait to take it off. He lets go of your nipple with a pop before looking up at you. "Let's get this fucking thing off you, princess..." He literally rips it off, tearing it in half, he bites his lips when he sees that you were wet through your panties. A clear sign that you were just as desperate for him as he was for you. You lean down to kiss him, Levi grunts into the kiss and hooks his fingers on your underwear before sliding it down your legs. The kiss was passionate and long, he was addicted to the taste of your lips, he could kiss you for hours.

When you pull away from the kiss, breathing heavily, you yelp as Levi's cold fingers tease your pussy. "So fucking wet...good girl." His lips return to your neck, his fingers getting more and more hasty. Levi pushes a finger into you making a whimper space your swollen lips. "Captain..." That tone in your voice makes Levi growl, he could his finger inside of you, you were so tight, so perfect and read for him. You start to rock your hips, wanting to feel all of him and Levi adds another finger, preparing you for him more. Your pussy clenched around his fingers as he managed to hit that spot, you knew Levi was skilled with his fingers but this was another level, no guy has actually gotten you to cum on their finger before.

It was a sensation you never felt before, his fingers hit every spot as he pumped them in and out of you, his lips were now marking your collarbones, your voice was turning into whimpers. "You gonna cum for me yeah?" You grip onto his shoulders, trying your best to hold back an orgasm which proves to be impossible especially as Levi starts to move his fingers faster, your moans grow louder. "Levi fuck! I am gonna cum!" Levi looks at you again, keeping his eyes on your face as you squirm and cum all over his fingers. "That's my girl, fuck you look so fucking pretty like this." He pulls his fingers out softly and puts them in his mouth to taste you. "Taste so good...I just want to eat it...but that is for later..."

Your eyes open and you look at him, you run your fingers down his abs to his belt, undoing it quickly. Levi helps you, he pulls out his hard cock and you live your lips. Lifting yourself up slightly, you rub his cock at your entrance, Levi places his hands on your waist, his eyes watching as his cock slowly disappears into your wetness. "Fuck..." He breaths out feeling your warm walls around his length, his arms tighten around your waist. You moan as you lower yourself on him completely, Levi lets you cockwarm him for a little bit so you adjust to his size.

"Can I move?" He asks as his hands move back to your hips, you nod your head, letting him take the lead. Without further question, Levi starts to move you up and down on his cock, his breath getting quicker with each slam of his hips. Your arms wrap around his neck and you bury your head into his shoulder feeling his cock pound into you. Levi's grip on your hips is tight, you're sure that it will leave marks but it doesn't your concern at all right now.

Rocking your hips, you start to move in sync with his thrusts, Levi groans and starts to move faster. "So fucking good....such a good pussy..." You hear him mutter, his voice is deep and almost needy. He noticed that you got tired after some time so he helped you by switching the position quickly. You're pushed back on the bed and Levi never pulls out of you, he takes your knees and pushes them up to penetrate you even deeper, your eyes roll back, a loud main of his name leaving your lips. He was quick with it.

This position was perfect, Levi was able to fuck you better like this, and his hips moved harder. Your nails were digging into his back as he slammed into you, your body was arching, carving for more. He moves your legs around his waist, his length diving deeper into you. "Oh yeah...that's it. Fucking...fuck." Levi leans in and kisses you, his tongue enters your mouth, this kiss was messy, it was proof of how passionate and intimidate your moment is.

Your pussy starts to clamp down on him, he knows you're close. "Fuck yeah, cum for me, let me see you fall apart." Levi starts to fuck you faster, his thrusts getting sloppier. You both cum at the same time, Levi growls slightly as he pulls out, cumming all over your skin....

"Levi, what did you wish for?" Hange's voice made Levi snap out of his thoughts. Levi looks around realizing that he wasn't even there with you, it was all in his head. He looks around the room, his eyes land on you as you hold a wrapped present for him with a smile. Levi looks at you for second before returning to look at his friends. "Nothing. I wished for nothing."

---------------------------------------------------

Taglist: @youre-ackermine @humanitys-strongest-bamf @romantichomicide95 @mrsackermannx @sixpennydame @svftackerman @hhighkey @cometlevi @notgoodforlife @levisbrat25 @randomlevithoughts @ackermendick @saenora @loveackermannn @levismylover @laurenzitaa @missyasma @sad-darksoul @thebobaprincess @la-undercover-latina @levilxvr @bpdtistic @erwinsmithsmissingleftarm

[distantdarlings]

HABITUAL // t. nott

RATING: PG-13 / 4.3K WORDS

Theodore Nott x Fem Reader Insert (Requested)

+ SUMMARY - *Requested - based on this (changed slightly)* Annoyed that Theo won't seem to make a move, despite your growing feelings for each other, you ask a friend of the both of you to help make him jealous.

+ WARNINGS - Language, brief sensuality, kissing, two time skips, making Theo jealous, brief fake-dating

+ MUSIC (listened to while writing) -

Ribs - Lorde

---

Professor Trelawney’s voice droned on as your quill lazily scratched across your notebook. You were between listening to what she was saying and sleeping, and your brain slowly tilted toward the second. She was rambling on about the properties of a crystal ball above all other vectors for sight-seeing. Something about its curvature made the answers come to you clearer…

Your quill tip ran dry and made a slightly louder scratch against the parchment, sending a nasty shudder down your spine. Your eyes darted over to your inkwell and noticed that it was practically empty. A deep sigh ran through your body, depressing your shoulders. Why was it you always ran out of something when you needed it most? Maybe grabbing a replacement would wake you up a bit. You raised your hand and waited for the long-winded professor to catch sight of it.

“Oh, yes, what is it?” she stared at you through her hugely magnified glasses, tilting her head back slightly to catch that sweet spot in them. 

“I’ve run out of ink. I was just wondering if I could—” A tap on your shoulder interrupted your question. You turned towards the owner of the hand and spotted Theodore. A small smile spread across your lips as a small backup inkwell was displayed in his hand. You nodded your thanks and grabbed it from him, intending to let the professor continue her lecture.  

“Never mind that, Professor Trelawney!” you said, flashing a brief smile at the eccentric woman. She nodded and continued as if she’d never stopped. You wondered when she’d take her next breath.

“You’re welcome, gorgeous,” a small whisper said next to your ear. You smiled at Theo’s flirtatious nature, knowing he’d use this little favor to ask for something in return later. He pressed a quick kiss to your cheek before backing up. You rolled your eyes, promising to get him back for that.

By the end of class, your stomach was growling, and your mind was exhausted. It was a good thing you didn’t have divinity again until Wednesday because you didn’t think you’d make it if you didn’t get a small break from her each week. And thank Merlin, your next class wasn’t until after lunch. 

You gathered your things and let them slide into your bag. The boys behind you had begun to do the same as you headed towards the door. They were always behind you for whatever reason. You weren’t sure. Maybe it was just a boy thing. 

“Hey!” Theo’s voice came from behind you. You turned to catch him jogging toward you with his hands tightened around his bag straps. You stopped and flashed a smile, watching as his eyes briefly flashed down to your lips. You withheld any physical reaction so as not to embarrass him. “Are you still eating with us?”

“Of course, I am,” you say, “I always do. It wouldn’t be a good day without having lunch with my favorite boy.” You gently touched your thumb and forefinger to his chin, teasing him just a bit. You saw his lips part as soon as your skin came into contact with his—just as it always did. 

“I’m your favorite boy?” he chuckled, letting a smirk fall over his lips. He readjusted his bag over his shoulders. Your fingers came up to separate your collar from your neck, allowing just a breath of skin to flash over his eyes. You watched as he glanced down at every inch of you that was revealed to him, and his throat slid up nervously. You could play him like a piano, and it was addicting. 

“Am I interrupting something?” Mattheo asked, coming up behind the two of you. His voice sliced the tension between the two of you in half. 

“Nope, we were just getting ready to head down to the Great Hall,” you replied. “Are you eating with us?”

“Duh, who else am I going to eat with?” Mattheo asked. You rolled your eyes at him and looped your arm through Theo’s, allowing him to lead the way to the dining hall. Enzo quickly jogged up beside the group, falling in step with the rest of them. Your big brother had a habit of always being the latest to the party. It was one of his many endearing qualities. 

Your group appeared before the vast doors of the Great Hall, allowing them to quickly swallow you all up as you realized that everyone else was just as starving as you were. You selected your usual seats at the far end of the long Slytherin table and dug in. Soon enough, yours and everyone else’s plates were piled high with the many options laid out before you.

“Merlin, help us all….if that wasn’t the most boring class yet,” Mattheo sighed into his food. The rest of you laughed at his confession, all nodding in agreement. Trelawney’s class was rarely exciting, but when it was boring, it was really boring. 

“The only bit of excitement was you asking for some new ink,” Theo nodded toward you, a bit of a roll pressed between his teeth. You smiled and shook your head.

“And, of course, you were there, right to the rescue,” you laughed. “I was hoping I could leave the class and grab a replacement from my dorm to wake myself up a little.”

“My bad, I thought I was helping.”

“You were…unfortunately,” you replied. The four of you laughed in response, knowing well enough that they all had done something to try and get out of the squirrely professor’s class. A comfortable silence ensued soon after as the group finished up their meals and let the large meal settle sweetly on their stomachs.

“I’m really tired now,” you groaned, laying your head down against the table. You felt a hand reach over and gently brush its fingers along your hair. You assumed it was Theo, as he habitually absentmindedly touched you somehow. You figured you were a sort of stress ball to him. A small laugh touched your chest at the thought. 

“Teddy, can I sit on your lap?” you asked, already knowing his answer.

“Of course, love, come here,” he responded. The three boys had begun to discuss some kind of new broom headed towards the Quidditch market, and, to be entirely honest, you couldn’t care less about it. All the more reason for you to doze off just a bit in Theo’s lap. You pulled yourself up and stepped over your side of the bench. You walked around the edge of the table, sleepily approaching Theo. Though his attention remained on his friends, his legs slid open and his arm pushed out, allowing you to be able to slip onto his lap. 

You gently grabbed his shoulder and stepped between his legs, settling yourself on his lap. Once you were seated, his arm slid firmly around your waist, sliding his fingers comfortably beneath the waistband of your skirt. You set your head on his shoulder, pressing your face close to his neck, letting your lips brush his skin every once in a while. If he could avoid any romantic feelings from this, he either genuinely disliked you or was utterly numb to all physical affection. 

Your goal for the last few weeks was to muster up every bit of courage the universe had blessed you with and completely take it out on Theo. The feelings and the tension sustained between the two of you were too obvious for it to mean nothing. He had feelings for you, you’d bet your final grade on it.

Just as your lips brushed his skin a third time, you noticed a trail of chills travel down the back of his neck. He shuddered slightly. You suppressed a smile. Just a little bit more…

“Teddy,” you whispered in his ear. He all but jumped and turned to look at you.

“What is it, darling?” he asked, sucking his bottom lip roughly between his teeth. Your eyes watched the motion for a few seconds before popping back up to his eyes.

“I was just wondering if you wanted me to rub your back a bit?” you asked, smiling innocently. “I know how sore it gets after Quidditch practice.” 

His eyes glanced between your lips and your eyes, savoring every detail of your face. The front of his pants tightened a bit, pushing a small adjustment out of him. He grabbed your waist, lifted you gently, slid his legs forward and farther apart, then set you back down. Heat pooled in your lower stomach at his ability to pick you up like it was nothing. Damn it, you had a raging crush on him.

“Uh, no, darling,” he breathed, eyes fully pulling away from you now. “I’m alright, maybe another time…and, actually, I think I’ll just…” he trails off, gently sliding you off his leg and onto the seat next to him. Disappointment and rejection swirl in your chest with every aching breath. He’d never done anything but be affectionate with you, but for some reason, he was acting off today. 

He got to his feet, completely avoiding all eye contact, and headed off from the table with another word. Your lips parted in surprise as you watched him walk off towards the exit. The boys behind you had stopped talking, and you turned to catch their attention.

“What is his problem?” Mattheo asked.

“I have no idea,” you respond slowly, glancing back toward the double doors as if he might walk in again. 

xxx

Later that evening, after all of your classes for the day had ended and dinner was revving up in the Great Hall, you sat on your bed, torn between a couple of things. For one, you were starved and wanted to grab some dinner; two, you were too scared you’d bump into Theo while you were down there and add a second painfully awkward interaction to the day; and three, your stomach was churning so violently with nerves and nausea, you were sure you’d puke if you ate anything or had one more thought about Theodore Nott. 

Every time lunch popped into your head again, you nearly hurled. That was easily one of the most embarrassing things that had ever happened to you, and you’d fallen off your broom during Quidditch while the whole school was watching. 

Maybe he’d lost feelings for you. That would explain the strange distance between the two of you today. But it didn’t make sense why it was so sudden. Had you upset him or made him uncomfortable today? You weren’t sure. Your brain ached from all of the contemplating and speed runs of scenarios you’d been doing the past hour. 

You could ask Enzo or Mattheo to see if they had any insight into their friend’s brain, but you figured that might be a little rude. You didn’t want Theo to think you were a coward or were trying to talk about him behind his back. Fuck.

Then, as if he was summoned by the force of your mind, Mattheo Riddle gave a brief knock and presented himself in the doorway. A smile pulled its way across your face at the appearance of the dark boy. You waved him over and gave a small pat to the space beside you.

“Hey,” he said, sliding himself beside you.  

“What’s up?” He kicks his shoes off and props his feet onto the bed, one resting comfortably over the other.

“Nothing much. I was just coming to see if you knew what was up with Theo today?” he asked, crossing his hands over his stomach.

“Actually, I was just thinking of coming to ask you or Enzo that,” you admit. “I have no idea what happened today. We didn’t talk the rest of the day.”

“Weird…” Mattheo trailed off. There were a few moments of empty silence as the two of you rested against your headboard, basking in each other’s company. After a while, his arm came up to slide around your shoulders. You slid closer to him and rested a head on his shoulder, the collar of his shirt gently tickling your nose. 

If you could remain like this for the rest of forever, you would. Mattheo had always been like another brother to you. Another overprotective Enzo to watch over you in everything you did, and, as annoying as that sounded (and sometimes was), you really did appreciate having them around you. You enjoyed Theo in that way, as well, though you admit that you wish something more would bloom between the two of you. A thought pops into your head.

“Matty,” you breathe, your eyes widening significantly. His eyes follow yours to see if he could catch what had shocked you so much.

“What?” He quirked an eyebrow.

“If I ask you for the hugest favor on earth, would you do it?”

“Well, that is kind of vague,” he points out, “what is the favor?” He watches you for a few moments as you struggle with what to say. A million details are running through your head, with possibilities and worst-case scenarios flashing around, making everything seem like one big, jumbled mess in your brain. But, despite the cacophony of opportunities flying around in your head, one thesis stood clear.

“Would you help me make Theo jealous?” you ask. Mattheo choked on his spit. The face he gives you makes you laugh out loud.

“I’m sorry?” he asks.

“I want you to help me make Theo jealous, like, you know, pretend to date me for a few days.” 

“Are you joking? Theo would kill me. I’m not risking that!” he exclaims, removing his arm from behind you to cross them. 

“Please, Matty, I’d never ask you for another favor again!”

“No! He already likes you. Why don’t you just ask him out?” he asks. You knew that Theo had feelings for you, just as he knew you had feelings for him, but hearing Mattheo confirm that aloud had you blushing. You supposed there was always the possibility you were wrong about Theo liking you and the two of you were just friends, but friends didn’t look at each other like the two of you did with eyes full of longing and hot lust. 

“Because I’m too nervous. I want him to make the first move,” you explain. He pinched the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger. A deep sigh pushed through his nose as he appeared to be contemplating. You waited in silence for a few moments, allowing him to weigh his options, though you knew what his answer would be. He never told you no.

“Alright—” 

“Yes! Oh, thank you, thank you! I promise I’ll make it up to you!” You threw yourself onto him, wrapping your arms tightly around his neck. He groaned at the sudden weight flung over him and reluctantly held you back. You could practically hear him rolling his eyes but, no matter how close he got to Theo, he’d always had a soft spot for you. You smiled and pressed a kiss to his cheek.

“Okay, okay, back up,” he sighed. “How do we do it?” 

“So, this was my plan…” 

You went over every detail of the well-thought-out plan you’d devised over the last few hours, making sure to leave nothing out. Every few moments, Mattheo’s eyebrows would raise, or he would start to protest, but he never backed out. And if he tried to, you’d just beg him some more.

So once you’d gone over everything successfully, you had Mattheo lead you downstairs with your fingers intertwined together. This had to work. 

The two of you stalked into the Great Hall, your stomach churning with anxiety and Mattheo’s preparing himself to run if needed. Your fingers squeezed his every so often, trying to wring the nerves out but failing miserably. Your eyes landed on the group sitting at your table and you made your way over.

“Hey, guys…” Enzo started and trailed off as his eyes traced the two of you, falling to where the two of you met in the middle. At Enzo’s sudden silence, Theo turned to look at the two of you. Your intertwined fingers clenched tightly, Mattheo’s thumb lightly tracing yours. 

“Hey,” you said, smiling sweetly. You avoided all eye contact as the two of you sat down beside Enzo, with you directly across from Theo. Mattheo’s arm wrapped around your shoulders and you leaned into him. Still, you refused to look at Theo, but out of the corner of your eye, you could see his eyes widened and lips slightly parted. 

“Friendly tonight, are we?” Enzo asked, stabbing a bit of potato with his fork. He seemed to be hiding a smile. You shot him a knowing glance.

“Shut up,” you joke. “We’ve just…”

“Gotten a bit closer?” Mattheo pressed a chaste kiss to your forehead, and you giggled in response. Damn, this acting deserved an award. You glanced at Theo's fist tightening, joints cracking slightly.

“Since when?” he asked, his voice baring through gritted teeth. Your eyes found him finally and your smile dropped a bit.

“Since he asked me out earlier today,” you retorted, the attitude laid on just a bit. His lips snapped shut and his eyes glanced away. He seemed less confident now, because—you hoped—he’d figured out your irritation with his refusal to move forward with your relationship.

“So, are you guys a thing now?” Enzo asked, not bothered in the slightest.

“You could call us that,” you giggled, fake-teasing Mattheo. Nerves broiled in your stomach as you discreetly pinched his hip. That had been the code the two of you had come up with to signal when you were going to do your kiss. This was going to be the big sale and it had to be realistic.

He leaned down and gently cupped your bottom lip with his, sending a wave of butterflies to your stomach. Damn, he was a good kisser. You pressed your lips back into him, admiring the feel of him. In all reality, the kiss only lasted about five seconds, but under the heat of the eyes before you, it felt like hours. When he pulled away, you flashed him a small smile.

Theo rose quickly and headed to the door, never once looking back. This has been the second time in one day he’d stormed off and you felt a bit embarrassed, to be honest. Maybe this wasn’t going to have the desired effect. You groaned and set your head against the table.

“Not working out for you?” Enzo chuckled.

“Shut up!” you shouted into your arms, the sound muffled. 

“You know…” Mattheo was right at your ear. You glanced up at him, tilting your head to the side. “You’re a pretty good kisser.” A smirk spread across his lips. You blushed

“Ugh, stop, Matty…you’re a good kisser too.” The three of you burst out laughing, reveling in the appreciation of each other’s company, before remembering why you were here. You really didn’t want to continue with this, it made you feel guilty, and there was always the chance this wouldn’t work. You sighed. You would have to go big or go home, and you weren’t a quitter.

xxx 

The next morning was a Saturday and Mattheo and you had planned a fake picnic date by the Whomping Willow. The plan was to enjoy a meal right within sight of where Theo was going to toss a Quaffle around with a couple of his friends. This had to work or you risked ruining your relationship with Theo. You prayed that this would give him the confidence to approach you. 

The two of you set the blanket and snacks out, settling in and beginning to eat. Enzo said that he had overheard that Theo was going to head out around eleven. It was currently fifteen ‘till, so you figured it wouldn’t be too long. Or you hoped that, anyway.

“So, what if this doesn’t work?” Mattheo breaks the silence, nursing a small bottle of pumpkin juice. 

“I was just thinking about that,” you laughed nervously, “I don’t actually know. I’m hoping he won’t hate me, but I’m more concerned he will hate you too.”

“I’m not too concerned about that. It’s alright. I’m just happy to help.” 

“Are you sure you don’t want anything in return?” you ask, peeling the crust off your sandwich. 

“I’ll just hang onto the favor for a rainy day,” he smirks. You roll your eyes and laugh gently. 

Above the two of you, a group of four players on brooms soar over you. You gasp and scoot closer to Mattheo, getting into position. He wrapped his arm around you and started to pretend to joke about something with you. You glanced Theo watching the two of you every so often. He would look for only a few seconds before turning his head away when his friends called his name. If he wasn’t careful, he was going to get hit in the head with the Quaffle (in which case, you’d laugh, but now wasn’t the time for that). 

“You know,” Mattheo started, “this is nice. We should do this more often.”

“What, have picnics?” you laugh, popping a grape into your mouth. 

“Sure, if you want,” he chuckled. “I just meant the hanging out part. I feel like I only see you whenever your brother’s around.”

“Yeah, it’s almost like he’s my brother and I love him,” you laughed. He shook his head in an attempt to hide his smile, but soon enough, the both of you were laughing. His head was thrown back as it racked his body, and your hand gripped his shirt sleeve to steady yourself.

“Hey, I need to talk to you—” The two of you snapped out of your moment of comedy at the sound of a voice. Your eyes squinted against the sun slightly before making contact with Theo. Mattheo glanced over at you and shrugged his shoulders, urging you on with his hand. Theo reached down and offered you his hand, which you took and allowed him to pull you to your feet. He marched the two of you over to the nearest courtyard, never letting go of your hand. Your stomach flushed.

“Theo, what is—?” He pulled you to a stop behind one of the courtyard’s stone pillars. Your eyes found his; the only sound was the slight breeze and the gurgle of the fountain behind him. He glanced down to your lips, his breaths exiting in heavy pants. Merlin, you wanted to kiss him.

“I have to ask you one question,” he said. You started to speak, but his thumb pressed gently against your bottom lip. “No, just wait one minute.”

His eyes fell to the ground between the two of you. It appeared that he was trying to figure out precisely what he wanted to say. His lips parted several times, the words of confession dancing along the edges of them. The frustration in his eyes set off an ache in your chest that you couldn’t suppress. You wanted to kiss him so bad, so bad, so bad. 

“One question…and then I’ll leave you alone,” he said. You nodded slowly. “Do you really like Mattheo? Is that why the two of you are together?”

Your eyes widened in surprise. That was definitely different from what you thought he was going to ask. You stuttered a few times before shutting your mouth. You didn’t know what to say. His eyes refused to leave yours, beckoning every inch of the truth out of you. He wanted to know if your feelings toward him were the same as his towards you. He fought the urge to reach out and press his lips against yours. Just one word, and he would. You sighed.

“No,” you confessed, “I don’t.” His stomach flipped. Yours did, too. You wanted to explain yourself, run through every detail of the plan devised between Mattheo and you but you were too ashamed. Luckily, he didn’t care why you were with Mattheo, other than you didn’t care for the boy as he previously thought you’d done. His hands slid easily along your cheeks, carefully tracing the soft skin there. He was testing the waters, wanting so badly to touch you and anticipating the possibility of a slap. 

“Can I ask one more question?” he whispered against your lips, the salty taste of his sweat dabbing against the tip of your tongue. You nodded breathlessly.

“Can I kiss you?” he asked, his eyes never leaving your parted lips. You didn’t answer. You pressed your lips roughly to his, hearing the sharp intake of breath he took as his hands tightened around your head. He held you in place, pressing you against the stone pillar behind you. Your hands came up to wrap around his waist, clenching the material of his shirt beneath your fingers. His hands dropped to the front of you, pushing you tightly against the pillar, fingers curving against your hipbones. Fuck. You were such a coward; you should have done this ages ago. 

When the two of you finally parted, reluctantly choosing air over each other, you did nothing but stare at the other. Heavy pants left the two of you; your hands clutched the other’s bodies, leaving little space between the two of you. Neither of you had words. All he could think to do was fold you into a tight hug. His arms wrapped around you with a hold like a vice. Your head turned and tucked itself into his shoulder where it had rested so many times before. And through your contentedly parted eyes, you could distantly see Mattheo, on the picnic blanket, smugly raising his pumpkin juice bottle to the two of you.

[marsplastic13]

'Complicated' (part 7) - Kaz Brekker x Reader

Idea - Kaz Brekker hires a prostitute to overcome his touch aversion, and be a better man for Inej, but things take an unxepected turn. Pairing: Kaz Brekker x Prostitute!Reader, (had to use y/n because I'm bad at names) Genre: modern AU, slow burn word count: 5.6k notes: I can't wait for your opinions on this one

@millercontracting @coldmermaidhologram @syd649 @luffysprincess

‘Kaz’

‘Baby’

‘Love’

‘What??’ he replied to the flood of messages.

‘AC is broken’

Kaz hesitated, staring at the screen, then he typed ‘Yes’

‘:)’

Half an hour later, y/n arrived at his house, looking visibly relieved. “Oh saints, I can breathe again,” she exclaimed, collapsing onto the couch. “It’s a centralized problem. The whole building is hot as hell.”

Kaz went back to type on his computer at the kitchen table, glancing up briefly. “Did they say how much time before it works again?”

“No,” she sighed, sinking further into the cushions. “I’m on forced leave from work.”

“You sound almost sad,” he chuckled, his eyes flickering back to the screen.

“I am. You have no idea of the interesting booking I had,” she said, turning to look at him. “Do you want to know what he asked for?”

“I think I’ll live better without knowing,” he replied, smirking.

“Boring.” y/n pulled out her phone and started watching TikToks, her occasional laughter punctuating the silence.

They sat in a comfortable silence for a while, both absorbed in their screens. The rhythmic tapping of Kaz's keyboard mixed with the occasional burst of sound from y/n's videos. 

After some time, Kaz broke the silence. “I have to work after dinner.”

“You have the weirdest work schedule,” she commented, glancing up. “Do you want me to make dinner?”

“We can order something,” he suggested, not looking up from his screen.

“I’ll cook.” y/n got up and opened his fridge, surveying its contents. “You know that you could eat something other than meat?” she said, studying the shelves.

“I think I have ice cream too,” he shrugged.

“So healthy,” she commented dryly, closing the fridge. “Is there a supermarket nearby?”

“Yep.”

“I’m going,” she announced.

Kaz stared at her, a small grin playing on his lips. y/n sighed, already knowing what he wanted. “It’s in my bag, take it.”

Kaz closed his laptop and settled onto the couch, pulling her Nintendo Switch from the bag. “Why don’t you just buy one?” she asked, not truly annoyed.

“Because I would develop an addiction. Speaking of, take the keys. I won’t get up to open the door even if you arrive with the police,” he replied, already engrossed in the game.

y/n muttered something about him being a child before taking his keys and heading out.

When she returned, y/n put on some music and started cooking, dancing around the kitchen between cupboards and stoves. Kaz occasionally shouted at the game, clearly immersed. The atmosphere in the apartment was light and relaxed.

“Have you been using my vape?” y/n asked, suddenly annoyed.

“No.”

“It’s empty.”

“Maybe it has a leak,” he suggested, not raising his eyes from the game. y/n cupped his face and turned it towards her, leaning in to smell his breath.

“You smell like cherries, you dirty liar. After all your venting about how smoking is bad?” y/n accused, her eyes narrowing playfully.

Kaz laughed, trying to maintain his focus on the screen. “Shut up, you’re distracting me.”

“Oh, I’m distracting you?” she shot back, crossing her arms. “Who was it that went on a twenty-minute rant about how terrible smoking is for your lungs, your heart, your—"

“Yeah, yeah, I get it,” he interrupted, his fingers flying over the buttons.

“And here you are, sneaking hits off my vape,” y/n continued, her tone teasing, “you even put it back in my bag to hide your tracks, just give up and buy one.”

“No, smoking is bad,” Kaz replied firmly, though his eyes never left the screen.

y/n let out an exasperated sigh. “Unbelievable.” 

y/n was done cooking and sighed as she saw Kaz completely engrossed in her game, sitting on the couch with no intention of moving. "Kaz, come on don’t be a child."

Kaz, eyes glued to the screen, mumbled, "Just one more level, I promise."

Rolling her eyes, y/n decided it was time for drastic measures. With a mischievous glint, she leaned over and swiftly snatched the console from his hands. “Hey!” he protested, reaching out to grab it back.

“Nope, you’ve had enough,” she declared, holding the console high above her head.

Kaz jumped up from the couch, trying to reclaim his—well, hers—gaming device. “Give it back, y/n! I was about to beat my high score.”

She laughed, stepping back and keeping the console out of his reach. “No.”

He lunged forward, and they began a playful tussle. y/n darted around the coffee table, and Kaz followed, both of them laughing. “You’re not getting away that easily,” he teased, reaching out to grab her waist.

She squealed, spinning out of his grasp and holding the console behind her back. “You’ll have to catch me first!”

Kaz paused, a sly grin spreading across his face. “Come on, my leg is already killing me today.”

“Then give up,” she laughed.

He feigned to the left, then quickly moved to the right, catching y/n by surprise. She tried to dodge, but he was quicker, wrapping his arms around her waist and lifting her off the ground.

“Put me down!” she laughed, kicking her feet in the air.

“I don’t care if I break my leg again, you’re giving it back,” he replied, twirling her around.

She clung to the device, laughing uncontrollably. “Okay, okay, you win!” she conceded, handing it over.

Kaz gently set her down, keeping a firm grip on the console. “See? That wasn’t so hard, was it?”

She playfully swatted his arm. “You’re a child.”

He chuckled, slipping the console into his back pocket. “And you’re annoying.”

They stood there for a moment, both catching their breath and smiling at each other. y/n shook her head, still laughing. “I’m going to cancel your game’s data.”

“There’s no need to get violent,” he said, offended, while they headed to the table. Kaz’s mouth watered at the sight and smell of the food.

“You cook really well for someone who hates eating,” Kaz said with his mouth half full.

“Rude, but thank you,” y/n replied with a smile, her fork tracing patterns on her plate.

Kaz stared at her, his gaze lingering a bit too long. 

y/n noticed and rolled her eyes. “Kaz, don’t look at me like that. If you say something about my relationship with food, I’m so going to remind you that you have a girlfriend and that I’m a prostitute.”

“We’re just eating,” he mumbled, trying to justify himself and feeling really guilty. He was still mad at Inej for postponing her visit, and he knew that he and y/n were playing with the boundaries that should exist in their relationship. 

He tried to focus on his plate, but his thoughts kept drifting. Maybe in that moment, it could look like an innocent dinner, a friend helping out a friend even, but later? When they would inevitably share a bed, without any payment beforehand? Or when he would book her for another session?

Kaz's mind was a whirl of conflicting emotions. He knew he should feel loyal to Inej, but he was still frustrated that she wasn’t there, and y/n had a way of making everything seem so easy.

y/n seemed to sense his turmoil. She put her fork down and reached out, touching his hand lightly.

“Are you feeling bad?”

“Yes,” Kaz admitted, his voice barely above a whisper.

“Good,” y/n replied with a small smile, her eyes twinkling with mischief.

He couldn't help but laugh, despite himself. “Fuck off.”

Kaz came back home later than he thought, plus, he took an unexpected punch in the eye that hurt like a bitch. He saw a dim light and soft talking coming from his room.

“Are you having fun on your trip?” he heard y/n's voice, but couldn't make out the answer. However, he heard her laugh.

Kaz peeked into his room, and y/n smiled at him, “It's my grandma,” she said, gesturing to the phone.

“Are you with a boy, sweetie?”

“I'm with a… friend,” she replied.

“Show him to me.”

“No,” she laughed.

“Is he ugly?”

“Grandma! No,” replied y/n, Kaz raised a brow, leaning on the doorframe, now very interested.

“Is he hot or is he cute?”

Kaz raised his brows even more, waiting for her answer.

“Don’t you have something to do? What happened to your face?” y/n narrowed her eyes to look better at him.

“Just a punch,” he shrugged before disappearing into the bathroom.

Kaz could still hear pieces of the conversation from her side. “No, Grandma, we're not sleeping together… My AC is broken… No, I didn't break it on purpose… Yes, he's cute… It's 4 am here!... Have a nice day, I love you.”

He took his spot in the bed as y/n put away her phone. “Is everything okay?” he asked.

“Yeah, my grandma is on one of those old-people-travels on the other side of the world and wanted to talk to me about her new crush. I was sleeping so well,” she said, leaning back into the pillows.

“Her new crush? How old is she?” he asked skeptically, taking the console she had left on his side.

“In her seventies. She’s a bit wild.”

“Sounds like someone I know,” he commented.

Kaz settled into the bed, gingerly touching his bruised eye. y/n was leaning against the headboard, her phone still warm from the call with her grandmother.

“Who punched you?” she asked, narrowing her eyes as she studied the bruise.

“An idiot,” Kaz replied, his voice laced with irritation.

“Hmm, he might have his reason. You're very punchable.” y/n’s lips curled into a teasing smile.

Kaz snorted, feeling a bit defensive. “It wasn’t my fault this time.” He rubbed his temples, the stress of the day catching up to him. The lingering ache from the unexpected punch added to his irritation.

y/n rolled her eyes playfully, nudging him with her shoulder. “Sure, it wasn’t.”

“I’m sending you back to your house,” he said, his tone half-serious, as he stretched his legs out, trying to ease the tension that had settled in his muscles.

“I’m taking back my Switch,” she shot back, snatching the console from his side with a triumphant grin.

Kaz’s hand shot out in a playful attempt to reclaim it, but she was quicker, holding it out of his reach. “Go to sleep,” he said, exasperated but amused, his frustration easing into a faint smile as they bantered.

“Do you want a kiss to make the pain go away?” she said with a dangerous smile.

Kaz sighed, a mix of annoyance and fondness tugging at him. “Are you a healer now?”

“I can be a lot of things,” she teased, her tone light and playful.

“Stop flirting with me,” he replied, though the teasing glint in his eyes softened his words.

“Alright,” y/n turned on her side, settling into the playful rhythm of their exchanges.

Kaz battled with himself for a moment, then gave in to the pull he felt towards her. He pulled her closer, their bodies fitting comfortably together.

“Maybe it’s worth a try, it hurts really bad,” he muttered against her neck, his voice muffled.

“Kaz, are you whining?” she asked, laughter dancing in her tone as she turned to face him. Her eyes met his, a hint of mischief in their depths.

He huffed in mock indignation, a playful glint in his eyes. “I'm not whining,” he protested lightly, but the corners of his mouth betrayed a smirk.

The girl's gaze lingered on his waiting lips, a teasing smile playing on her own. With a deliberate slowness, she leaned in and placed a soft kiss on his temple. Kaz responded with an annoyed hum, his eyebrow quirking in response to her playful gesture.

“What? Were you expecting more?” she asked, raising a brow mischievously, her eyes flickering with amusement.

Kaz tilted his head, feigning contemplation. “I don’t know, maybe a little more sympathy?” he teased, his tone light despite the heaviness of their unspoken tension.

“Oh my poor baby, come here,” she playfully pulled him closer, her arms wrapping around him and messing with his hair.

He leaned into the contact, closing his eyes briefly and allowing himself a moment of comfort in her embrace.

“You’re so clingy, Kaz,” she commented after a while, her voice light with teasing. “Who knew you had it in you?”

“I’m not,” he retorted, a hint of amusement in his voice.

“And you’re also delusional,” she added playfully, her fingers tracing gentle patterns on his back.

“Shut up,” he replied softly, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips despite himself.

“Are you this annoying with your girlfriend too?” she teased gently, the question hanging in the air.

“She’s not paid to spend time with me,” Kaz replied, his tone tinged with seriousness.

“I’m not working tonight,” she reminded him gently, her fingers stilling on his back, their closeness emphasizing the unspoken boundaries between them.

Kaz nodded silently, the weight of their complicated relationship settling over them once more. He knew their moments together existed in a fragile balance, a delicate dance between companionship and something more undefined.

Kaz hated how peaceful he felt, how badly he craved the normalcy of their interactions, the lightness. Every time Inej would come back, it was like they had to learn to adjust to each other again. And when they were finally comfortable, she would leave again. While he fell asleep, Jesper's words kept echoing through his mind: “You're playing house with a hooker.” He couldn't be more right.

He couldn't ignore the transactional nature of their relationship, the blurred boundaries that came with it. Yet, there was something genuine in the way she looked at him, in the way she laughed at his jokes, in the way she cared.

He couldn't deny that he was playing a dangerous game, one that could hurt everyone involved. But in the quiet moments, when it was just the two of them, it felt almost normal. It felt like he had someone who understood him.

As he finally drifted off to sleep, Kaz couldn't help but feel a pang of guilt. He knew he was betraying Inej. The emotional connection he was forming with y/n was real, and it scared him.

When Kaz woke up the next morning, y/n wasn't there. In the kitchen, he found breakfast ready and a note: “Didn't want to wake you, I have to go. Thanks again for yesterday.”

He went on with his day, wondering if the AC at y/n's house had been fixed or not. He knew he wasn't supposed to think about it, that he wasn't supposed to hope that she would write to him again. But at some point, he gave in.

‘How's the AC?’ he texted.

‘Still broken,’ she replied.

Kaz was unsure of what to do. Rationally, he knew that he shouldn't have even texted her.

‘Don’t worry, I'm staying with a friend,’ she sent, like she was reading his mind. He was a bit annoyed, more than he let himself admit.

‘Guess I'll find others Switch and vape,’ he replied, a bit unjustifiably bitter.

‘Ask your girlfriend,’ she retorted. Kaz sighed; he deserved it.

As he put his phone down, Kaz couldn't shake off the unease. He knew his connection with y/n was treading dangerous waters, but he also couldn't deny how much he enjoyed her presence, the effortless way she fit into his life. He leaned back, trying to focus on work, but his mind kept drifting back to y/n. He knew it was wrong, but for the first time in a long time, he felt something akin to happiness.

***

A few days later, Kaz was waiting for y/n to pick him up since she finally got her driving license back, thanks to one of her clients who pulled a few strings, and she wanted to show him her bright new Mini Cooper. She sent him a picture of her outside his house. Kaz was gathering his things when a series of messages got his focus.

‘SHE'S HERE.’

‘INEJ IS HERE.’

‘SHE'S ENTERING THE BUILDING.’

Kaz froze, looking out of the window, he saw the Mini make an illegal turn and speed away. 

He was still paralyzed when Inej opened his door. “Surprise!” she said brightly.

“Nej! What are you doing here?” Kaz hoped he sounded happy, while the adrenaline of being almost caught made his heart race. He moved to hug her, unsure of how to seem natural. Since when was he so bad at concealing his thoughts?

Inej started talking about how he was right, that she had been unfair with him, but his mind was focused on how close she had been to seeing him getting into y/n’s car. Kaz had no idea what kind of excuse he could've come up with.

“Sorry, were you going somewhere?” Inej noticed how he was actually ready to leave.

“Just a work thing. Let me make a phone call and cancel,” he said, trying to sound nonchalant.

Kaz went to his room to call y/n, who answered from the speaker of the car with a series of curses. “That was so fucking close, I'm so sorry, love.”

“It’s not your fault, great timing by the way,” he said, his words leaving a bitterness in his mouth. He couldn't believe that his girlfriend was in the other room, and he was calling another girl to talk about how close they got to getting caught together. What kind of person was he becoming? Kaz leaned against the wall of his room, the phone still warm in his hand, and stared at the ceiling. The situation felt surreal, like he was watching someone else's life unravel. How had he ended up here?

“Shut up, my legs are still wobbly. Enjoy your evening and don't take her to that place with the rooftop pool; my boyfriend is taking me there.”

He snorted. “The old man?”

“Don’t you have a girlfriend to annoy?” she laughed. “Get lost, Kaz. See you soon,” she said before ending the call. He stood there a second more, then typed ‘Be careful’ and hit send.

Kaz took a deep breath, steadying himself before rejoining Inej. He plastered on a smile, hoping it looked genuine. The weight of his deceit pressed heavily on him, and as Inej continued talking about her recent travels, he couldn't shake the feeling that he was spiraling into something he couldn't control.

“Why do you have vegan ice cream?” Inej asked, puzzled, as she rummaged through Kaz’s freezer.

Kaz’s heart skipped a beat. “Fuck,” he thought, the image of y/n flashing through his mind. He had completely forgotten about that.

“It was on sale,” he replied, trying to sound nonchalant, though the slight hitch in his voice betrayed him.

Inej raised an eyebrow, a playful smile tugging at her lips. “You’re always saying that being vegan is stupid. Who are you, and what did you do to my boyfriend?” She laughed, stepping closer and pulling him into a light kiss.

“If she only knew,” Kaz thought, guilt gnawing at him. 

***

Kaz and Inej fell into a comfortable routine, with Inej practically moving in with him. She only went to her house every few days, which should have felt like a step forward in their relationship. Yet, Kaz couldn’t shake the feeling that something was off. Despite his progress with his touch aversion, which he had always seen as a significant hurdle, Inej seemed uncomfortable with the changes. Every time they were in his car, he had to force himself not to touch her. This was something he had never imagined possible, because for him, it had become a habit to drive with his hand on y/n's thigh. But Inej kept shoving him away.

Of course, Kaz knew that Inej had her own issues with physical contact, stemming from her traumatic past. He understood that her boundaries were there for a reason, and he respected them. However, he couldn’t help but feel that his issues were more pressing on their relationship, more in need of resolution. He had worked so hard to overcome his aversion, thinking it would bring them closer. They had started holding hands and sharing the same bed, but Inej wasn’t as clingy as he discovered himself to be.

Doubts began to cloud Kaz's mind. Maybe if he hadn’t sought a quicker way to solve his problems, he would have been more at peace now. But would he, really? The ability to remain calm when someone accidentally brushed against him wasn’t exactly a bad thing. It was progress. But he wondered if he had pushed too much with y/n. Had he relied on her too heavily to guide him through his issues? He had just wanted to be the right person for Inej, but now he started feeling like he had gotten it all wrong.

He recalled the late-night conversations with y/n, the way she had encouraged him to face his fears, to push his limits. It felt good, liberating even. But now, with Inej beside him, those same actions felt like betrayals. Inej’s discomfort was palpable, and it made Kaz question everything. Was he really doing this for her, or was it for himself? Had his need to fix himself overshadowed the essence of their relationship? When exactly did he stop doing it for Inej and started doing it for himself?

Kaz’s mind was a whirlpool of conflicting emotions. He had always believed that conquering his touch aversion would be the key to a more intimate, more fulfilling relationship with Inej. But now, with her subtle rejections, he felt more distant from her than ever. He wanted to reach out, to hold her, to reassure her, but every touch seemed to push her further away.

As he lay in bed beside Inej, Kaz couldn’t help but think about how different things were with y/n. It was intoxicating, but it also made him feel guilty. He had sought out y/n to fix his problems, but now he realized that the solutions she offered might not be compatible with his life with Inej.

Kaz rolled over, staring at the ceiling. He needed to find a balance, a way to reconcile the progress he had made with his need to respect Inej’s boundaries. He had to stop doubting himself and start focusing on what truly mattered: being there for Inej in the way she needed, not the way he thought she needed. It was a daunting task, but Kaz knew it was the only way to salvage their relationship.

All of Kaz’s good ideas and resolve dissolved into a murky cloud of confusion as he found himself slipping out of bed and quietly getting into his car. The drive was eerily silent, matching the turmoil in his mind. He parked nearby and waited, feeling foolish with each passing minute. The neighborhood suddenly filled with the blare of loud music, and Kaz’s heart lurched as he saw y/n’s Mini Cooper turn the corner at an alarming speed, brakes squealing in protest. He watched, almost in disbelief, as she parked somewhat haphazardly, and she and her friends stumbled out of the car, leaning on each other for support. y/n lingered a moment longer than the others, retrieving something from under her seat.

Kaz approached quietly, his voice breaking the silence. “y/n,” he called out.

Startled, she turned, a frown creasing her features. “Are you drunk? You just got your license back,” Kaz blurted out, unable to stop himself.

y/n sighed, “I’m just a bit tipsy.”

“What happened to that light?” Kaz gestured towards the damaged light on her car.

“Why the fuck are you here, Kaz? Where’s your girlfriend?” Her annoyance was palpable.

Guilt flooded Kaz. “I… She’s sleeping. At my house.”

y/n raised her brows in surprise. “Kaz, why are you here?”

Avoiding her gaze, Kaz struggled to find an answer. He had no clear explanation for his impulsive decision. “She’s… She’s not you,” he finally admitted, the words heavy with admission.

y/n’s face hardened, her arms crossing defensively. “Yeah, are you here to remind me?”

“No, I—” Kaz faltered, unable to voice the thoughts that had been swirling in his mind for days.

“What?” y/n’s tone was sharp, demanding.

Taking a deep breath, Kaz finally gathered his courage. “I want you.”

y/n looked down, shaking her head slightly. “No, you don’t,” she replied coldly, her voice cutting through the night air. “y/n, let me explain—”

“Explain what?” She interrupted him, her tone laced with bitterness. “You don’t know me, Kaz. You want what we have when you pay for it, because I’m a whore and you’re my client.”

“That’s not true, y/n—”

“It is true,” she insisted, her voice hardening. “You don’t want me, trust me. Fuck, Kaz, I told you ages ago that if you were catching feelings for me we should’ve stopped.” She ran a hand through her hair, frustration evident.

Kaz felt anger building inside him, fueled by frustration and a sense of injustice. His words were sharp, a challenge to y/n, cutting through the air with an intensity that matched the turmoil in his heart.

“Oh yeah, because I’m the only one here who crossed boundaries, right? Look at me and tell me that you don’t feel anything.” Kaz’s voice held a mix of accusation and desperation. He locked eyes with y/n, searching for any sign of affirmation or denial, needing validation that what he felt wasn't one-sided.

y/n hesitated, her eyes clouding with a fleeting mixture of emotions—sadness, uncertainty, and something Kaz couldn't quite decipher. Her hesitation spoke volumes, a pause filled with unspoken truths and conflicted feelings.

Kaz held his ground, waiting for her response, hoping against hope that she would reveal what he yearned to hear. The silence stretched between them, heavy with unspoken words and the weight of their complicated situation.

When y/n finally spoke, her voice carried a hint of vulnerability beneath its usual composure. "You don’t know me," she repeated, her words laced with a touch of sadness, less firm than before.

After y/n's words hung in the air, Kaz felt a knot tighten in his chest. Her raw honesty pierced through his defenses, forcing him to confront uncomfortable truths he had been avoiding.

“I want to know you,” Kaz insisted softly, his voice a whisper of vulnerability amidst the tension.

“No, you don’t! Let’s be serious, Kaz,” y/n's tone sharpened with frustration, her eyes holding a mix of defiance and pain. “We do this. We get together, we go on dates, how long before you ask me to leave my job?”

Her words hit Kaz like a blow to the gut. He knew she was right. The thought of y/n continuing her work while they pursued something deeper had always nagged at him, buried beneath his desire for closeness and intimacy. Yet, facing her accusation head-on made it all too real.

“How long before it makes you lose it and become like my ex-boyfriend, beating the shit out of me?” y/n’s voice quivered with the weight of her past, her fear palpable in the air between them.

Kaz's heart clenched at the mention of her ex-boyfriend, a reminder of the darkness y/n had escaped and the wounds she still carried. He couldn't bear the thought of causing her more pain, of becoming a source of anguish rather than solace.

He wanted to argue, to assure her that he was different, that he would never hurt her. But the truth lingered in the back of his mind, unspoken yet undeniable. Deep down, he knew y/n was right. He couldn't ignore the unease he felt about her profession, about the risks and compromises it entailed.

As y/n stood before him, her vulnerability laid bare, Kaz struggled to find the words to express the turmoil inside him. Admitting that he couldn’t accept her job felt like a betrayal of everything y/n represented—an independent spirit, unapologetically herself.

But he also couldn’t deny the growing ache in his chest, the longing to protect her from harm, even if it meant sacrificing the connection they shared. It was a choice he wasn’t ready to make, yet one that loomed over their fragile bond.

“I would never—” Kaz began, his voice tinged with hurt and frustration.

“He said that too,” y/n cut in sharply, her words a stark reminder of past betrayals and broken promises. Kaz winced, feeling the weight of her accusation like a punch to the gut. He wanted to protest, to defend himself against the comparison to her ex-boyfriend, but y/n’s pain was palpable, and he couldn’t deny its validity.

“y/n, let me just—” Kaz attempted to interject, but his words faltered as he struggled to find the right words to bridge the widening gap between them. His mind raced, grappling with the realization that his actions had inadvertently pushed y/n away, reinforcing her fears and insecurities.

In that charged moment, Kaz saw y/n not just as the confident and alluring woman he had grown close to, but also as someone who carried deep scars from a past he hadn’t fully understood. He had prided himself on being different, on offering her a haven from the shadows of her past, yet now he saw how fragile that sanctuary had become.

“y/n,” Kaz began again, his voice softer now, tinged with regret. “I never meant to—”

“Save it, Kaz,” y/n cut him off, her tone weary yet resolute. “You can’t change who you are any more than I can change who I am.”

She stepped closer, her hand brushing his hair gently. “Go back to your girlfriend, love. Or break up with her if you don’t want her anymore. It wouldn’t work between us.”

“Why do you think that?” Kaz whispered, his hands trembling slightly as they found their way to y/n’s waist, pulling her closer against him. His heart raced with a mixture of longing and fear, the weight of his words heavy on his tongue. He could feel y/n’s warmth against him, a tangible reminder of the connection they shared, yet he feared it might slip away forever.

“Tell me that you’re not happy with me,” Kaz continued softly, his voice cracking with emotion. “Tell me that it’s all a facade, all fake, and I’ll leave and never look for you again.”

His words hung in the air, a desperate plea wrapped in vulnerability. Kaz knew that admitting his feelings meant risking everything—his relationship with Inej, his self-image, and the fragile bond he had formed with y/n. Yet, in that moment, all he could think about was the uncertainty of their future and the ache of wanting something he might never have.

y/n’s eyes searched his face, her expression unreadable as she weighed his words. Kaz held his breath, waiting for her response, knowing that whatever came next would change everything.

“You can’t give me what I want,” she murmured sadly, a wistful smile on her lips. “I like my life, the freedom of it. I don’t want to change it. And you shouldn’t change yourself, not for Inej, but even more, not for me. You two are legends, Kaz. What you did for each other, all the fears you overcame for her, the—”

Kaz cut her off, unable to bear another moment of uncertainty. He pressed his lips firmly against hers, a desperate attempt to drown out the doubts and fears that threatened to consume him. y/n responded instantly, her hands sliding to the back of his neck, pulling him closer in a mix of longing and hesitation.

He guided her a few steps back, maneuvering until she was pressed between his body and her car. Their kiss deepened, a passionate exchange that spoke volumes without words. In that moment, the world outside ceased to exist for Kaz. All that mattered was the taste of her lips, the feel of her body against his, and the undeniable pull between them.

For a heartbeat, everything felt right, like they belonged in each other's arms. But beneath the surface of their heated embrace, Kaz couldn't shake the weight of y/n's earlier words. He knew their connection was fraught with complications, tangled in emotions and circumstances that threatened to unravel any semblance of stability.

Yet, as he held her close, Kaz couldn't deny the intensity of what he felt. It was more than physical attraction; it was a yearning for understanding, for connection, for something deeper than he had ever allowed himself to explore before.

But as quickly as their passion ignited, y/n pulled back, leaving Kaz momentarily stunned and breathless. Her eyes searched his, a mix of sadness and resolve shining through.

“Go away,” she whispered, her voice tinged with sadness. “Go back to your girlfriend and forget about me.”

Kaz nodded slowly, as if emerging from a dream. “Don’t ever ask me again to be the better person,” she continued, her voice flat yet determined. “If I ever find you here again, I won’t stop you. I won’t hesitate. I will let you do whatever you want. And I won’t care. I’ll move on with my life. But you will regret it, trust me.”

Her words hung between them, stark and undeniable. Kaz felt a knot tighten in his chest, a mix of guilt, regret, and a profound sense of loss. He had pushed too far, crossed boundaries he shouldn't have, and now he faced the consequences of his actions.

With a final nod, Kaz turned and walked back to his car, each step heavy with the weight of uncertainty and regret.

[dreamcatcher2113]

The Sunflower and The Dragon: The Dragon’s Sunflower

Summary: No one would have that Aegon Targaryen would settle down, and commit to someone. Then he met you. Aegon started to become a better person since he met you. The two of you just made sense when you are together.

Author Note: Just another cute little series that I want to do.

Warnings: Suggested Sexual Content

Masterlist

The Dragon’s Sunflower

It was early morning, Aegon was dead to the world. He usually doesn’t wake up at ass crack of dawn. So when he turned to your side of the bed, expecting you to be there. Instead he feels your side of the bed empty. Aegon should have known that you are already up, he looks at the clock that was on the bed table. It was 9 in the morning, Aegon groaned as he got out of bed. He loves you dearly, even though you love waking up before noon is a mystery to him. Aegon puts on gray sweatpants, and decide to just go shirtless because why the fuck not. It’s yours and his apartment, he can do whatever he wants.

Aegon walks out of your shared room and turns to the kitchen. He starts to hear music, and then he sees you with your hair up in a messy bun, and only wearing one of his black shirts. He couldn’t help but to smirk at the sight. Aegon sits on one of the chairs on the island, watching you sway your hips. The shirt is a little long, but it left room to the imagination. His goldendoodle Sunfyre came up barking happily. You turned and saw your boyfriend sitting on the chair, smirking at you. 

“Oh goodness. Aegon you scared me.” You were startled at his sudden appearance, but smiled regardless.

“Good morning my sunflower, what are you making?” Aegon asked.

“I am making french toast.” You said sweetly, putting the bread on the frying pan.

Aegon chuckled a little bit, since your back was turned you didn’t see him walking behind you. He wraps his arms around your waist, you jumped a bit but relaxed. Aegon starts kissing your neck.

“Aegon.” You called out his name.

“Yes, my love.” He replied.

“I’m trying to make breakfast for us.”  You said, but not really trying to pull away from him. Leaning into him closer, you love feeling his touch. 

Aegon smirked into your skin. “I’m not hungry at the moment. I’m craving for something else.” He continues to assault your neck, moving his hand to your hips, rubbing circles on them. Wanting to feel your lips, he spins you around so you are facing him. Aegon immediately smashed his lips against yours. He licks your bottom lip, asking for access and of course you gave it to him. Your hands begin to travel to his hair, gripping it. Aegon couldn’t get enough of you, you have become his addiction. The both of you pulled apart for air, his lips made their way back to your neck this time he wants to find the little special spot that makes you weak in the knees. His hands travel to the bottom of the shirt you are wearing a little bit, exposing a little bit of the dark green lace panties that Aegon loves so much. 

“Aegon.” You moaned a bit.

“Yes sunflower?” Aegon said against your neck, still raising the shirt a bit more.

“The stove is still on, and I really don’t want to explain to our landlord why we burned our kitchen down.” You explained, feeling Aegon sucking on the spot on your neck that makes you feel weak.

Chuckling a bit, Aegon skillfully turns off the stove and he picks you up and places you on the counter that is next to the stove, earning a yelp from you. He places himself between your legs, and you wrap them around his waist. The two of you start kissing again, his hands gripping into the shirt that you are wearing, and sliding it up more. While your hands explore his neck and his hair. Aegon pulls you closer, and moves the collar of the shirt, so he can kiss the space between your neck and shoulders and starts marking you up again.

“My love.” You said so sweetly, one hand gripping his hair while the other grips on his bareback.

“I’m a little busy Princess.” He said, kissing your neck this time.

Giving up, you just let Aegon do what Aegon does. Not that you are complaining. Wanting to mark him up too, you make him pull away from you for a bit. He looks at you with puppy eyes, and pouts a little bit. You giggled at his reaction, and started kissing his neck. Aegon moans a little bit when you start to suck on the spot on his neck. Once you pull away, you admire your work. Aegon smirks and starts kissing you once again.

“Gods I want you sunflower.” Aegon growls in your ear.

“What’s stopping you my dragon?” You asked.

Aegon chuckles a bit, he was about to pull the shirt off but then his phone begins to ring. Usually he would just ignore it but he recognized that ringtone, and knows that it’s his mom that’s calling. He grunts in frustration, a little irritated that the two of you were interrupted. 

You giggle a bit. “You should probably go get that.”

Aegon groans again. “Fine.” He gives a quick peck, and leaves to answer his phone.

You couldn’t help but laugh a little bit. You hop off of the counter and start making breakfast again. You hear his footsteps again, hearing Aegon talking to his mom. “Just give me one sec mom, I’ll put you on speaker.”

“Alright mom, you’re on speaker.” Aegon said. As he sits on the chair that he sat on before.

“Hello Y/N.” You hear Alicent.

“Hey Alicent.” You yelled back, still making french toast.

“I was wondering if you would like to come to a family dinner at our place tomorrow night.” Alicent said over the phone.

You looked at Aegon, mouthed if he wanted to go. Even though his relationship with his mother and the rest of his family has gotten better, there are still wounds that need healing. As much as you love his family, Aegon’s well being is more important to you. Aegon gave you a nod, telling you that it’s okay.

“We’ll be there Alicent.” You answered, putting the last of the french toast on the plate. Putting them on the island where Aegon is sitting.

“Great! We will be seeing you tomorrow night. It’ll be nice seeing you both.” Alicent said.

“It’ll be nice seeing you too Alicent.” You said.

“I have to go. Love you both.” Alicent said.

“Love you too mom.” Aegon replied, and hung up on the phone. Aegon sighed, you reached one of your hands to hold on to his. Without hesitation he holds your hand back. Rubbing his thumb across your knuckles, grounding himself a little bit.

“Are you sure you want to go, baby? We don’t have to if you don’t want to.” You suggested, looking over your boyfriend with a worried look.

Aegon shakes his head no. “No, sunflower. I want to go. Mom has been trying, and I want to show her that I am too.”

You walk around the island and sit on Aegons lap. Wrapping your arms around his neck, while Aegon has his arms around your waist so you wouldn’t fall.

“You have been trying my love. You have made so much progress, and I am so proud of you.” You said. Putting your forehead against his, smiling at him. 

Aegon smiles back at you. “Thank you, sunflower.”

“Of course, my dragon.” You said back, giving him a quick peck on the lips. The two of you started feeding each other the french toast you made. The both of you were laughing, smiling and having a good time. Moments like these, makes you feel so thankful that you fell in love with Aegon. Even though things started rocky between the two of you, you wouldn’t have it any other way. You and Aegon are happy together, and both of you have become better people for each other. You love this man, and he loves you too.

[papermint-airplane]

10 random facts about me

I was tagged by @rebelangelsims 😘

Let's see. I think I've done some random facts asks before so there may be some overlap because I'm not a very interesting person but let's see...

When I was like 6 or something, my brother had me convinced he was Peter Pan and he gave me a little bag of pixie dust. I was (and still am) terrified of heights but he told me if I jumped off the back porch, which was really high off the ground to tiny me, that I would fly if I sprinkled the pixie dust on myself. I got as far as climbing over the railing and trying to summon the courage to jump when he stopped me. Turns out the pixie dust was powdered sugar.

My favorite song of all time is Free Somebody by Luna from f(x). Idk what it is about that song that my brain latched onto like "yesssssss this is the one" but I just love it.

I am named after Laura Ingalls Wilder.

I am intensely weirded out by puppets, particularly of the Muppet variety. There's just something about those felt-covered bastards I don't trust.

I started playing the Sims 1 in 2002 when I was 16. I never owned a single expansion pack for it, but it captivated me so much, I was almost late for work more than once because my pixel people needed me.

I always say "please" and "thank you" to my virtual assistants, not because I'm afraid of a robot uprising, but because that's just how I am. I don't even realize I do it, most of the time. Me and Bixby (I'm a Samsung user) actually have beef because I'll be like "Hey Bixby open Outlook, please" and she'll be like "lol bitch Idk what Outlookplease is" and I'm like "OPEN. OUTLOOK. Please." and she's like "Idk what you want me to do, you don't have Outlookplease installed on your phone" and I'm like "I AM TRYING TO BE NICE TO YOU" and Bixby just sits there all smug and not opening Outlook like aldjfalsdjfadsjfalsjfsd what do you want from me why won't you accept my politeness???????

I have made my Simself in every version of the game except Sims 1 because it wasn't possible to do so. But in Sims 2, 3, and 4, I have made myself and of course I am always a witch with a black cat familiar.

My addiction to CAS goes back to childhood when I used to make dresses for my Barbies out of random scraps of fabric. I didn't know how to sew, though, so everything was held together with safety pins, dental floss, school glue, and tape.

Not only can I whistle, I can whistle pretty darn well. I can't sing worth a damn so I guess God felt sorry for me and gave me one singular musical talent. It just so happens to be the one that most people find incredibly annoying.

I've been fascinated by Greek mythology since I was a small child entirely too young to be reading Greek mythology. Do you know how much incest there is in Greek mythology?! A lot. A LOT! I was raised by Fundies so it's really surprising I was allowed to read those stories and nobody was like "hey maybe the 6 year old shouldn't be reading about all this murder and incest and baby-eating". Because baby-eating also comes up a surprising amount of times. I still love it, though. Give me a good Greek myth any day.

Hmmmmmm let's see...who to tag...

Well if you read all of that crazy shit up there, I'm tagging you. Yes, you! You reading this!

Also, @venriliz, @getboolpropped, @changingplumbob, @coreene-simblr, @druidberries, and @living-undead don't ask questions just do it unless you don't want to.

[eazy-peazy54]

ugh THANK YOU for making that will wood fandom post. okay this ask is gonna be super long and i’m really sorry to vent in your inbox but anyway. i heard about will on tumblr several years ago right after the normal album dropped but before he “blew up” (using that term loosely lol) and i’ve steadily watched his fanbase become more and more unbearable. for context i’m in my mid 20s, so unfortunately quite a bit older than a large portion of his current fans.

it’s really disappointing to me to see how strangely and unhealthily young people interact with media they like. i won’t waste time reiterating what you already said very well, but i will add something about the opposite end of the weird fan spectrum. so you basically called out some of the very public manic obsession that his younger fans display, but then there’s the other fans who do literally the opposite (to an obnoxious degree) where they say he’s literally just some guy etc. and like. i’m totally on board with the just some guy movement like yes let’s please acknowledge that artists are just people who happen to create something that you enjoy (especially small artists like will who aren’t even “famous” like he’s a niche indie artist that gained some recognition for a viral song but there are some kids out here treating him like a c-list celebrity like??) HOWEVER i do not understand why they have to act like any sort of emotional attachment to him or his work is toxic fan behavior. there’s absolutely no balance and it’s exhausting.

i personally feel like i and some of his older fans (older in age and duration i.e. mid 20s and/or been a fan since before early-mid 2021? i feel like that’s when he went viral) naturally engage in a more sane way. i personally am incredibly attached to his music, it means a lot to me, i listen to it a ton, and i also enjoy will as a person; i very much admire the brain, the mind, the person behind the art. i think he’s funny, intelligent, interesting, not to mention one of the most talented musicians / artists in general that i’ve ever come across. i like listening to him in interviews and on his podcast. and i think i manage all of that in a healthy and respectful way. i don’t think it’s difficult. but for some reason there are some fans who probably wouldn’t like the second part of that. they take “separate the art from the artist” way too far. “Do Not Have An Opinion About This Human You Perv”. it’s annoying. calling him pretty or attractive or whatever also gets met with some very weird reactions. “HE’S JUST A GUY” yes most of us are, in fact, just a guy™️ (gender neutral). saying he’s cute is not sexual harassment.

another thing that actually pisses me off so much is these fans describing and categorizing him based on their and their mutuals very specific demographic. “white teenage transmasc audhd neurodivergent mentally ill queer etc. etc. etc.” music. that is such a limited and myopic generalization. first of all, he had fans way before you, your age group is not his target demographic, nor is it his core demographic, on top of that he’s explicitly stated he doesn’t want people your age listening to him. he’s not for you. second, it absolutely makes sense that mentally ill people gravitate towards him given that he himself is severely mentally ill, so this part of the description pisses me off the least, but still, he’s also a recovering/recovered alcoholic, but i don’t see people saying he makes music for addicts? idk.

next is the queer bit. yeah gay people like him. i get it. he’s a queer safe space and that’s cool and i appreciate it but i feel like it’s still narrowing the categorization. he also has a lot of neurodivergent fans and i understand why. i think my main issue is just a combination of all of these very specific descriptors you know? like yeah he has fans that fit all of this but when you lump all of it together to describe his music and the entirety of his fandom then it becomes too much. whatever. anyway. the one that makes me the most mad is the white thing. i hate it when music that isn’t inherently racial is divided by race. it’s alienating and divisive and exclusionary and unnecessary. there are plenty of fans of color and there would probably be even more if some of y’all didn’t insist on generalizing his music based on your own limited experience. i think that’s sort of a microcosm of what a lot of poc talk about on here, about being shoved out of fandom spaces? like imagine you’re an adult queer black guy and you keep hearing about this will wood person who makes really cool music so you go to give it a try and find a bunch of 14yos calling him white preteen transmasc music. super off putting. even as someone who actually does fall into a couple (not all) of the demographics they talk about i know i would absolutely not be a fan now if i’d discovered him later than i did. which makes me sad. anyway. sorry this is definitely getting very long and rambly so i’m sorry about that i just have a lot of opinions about this fanbase.

oh my god this put everything i missed into words THANK YOU 😭

I completely agree with everything you just said!!! Honestly the whole big point with my essay was to just say "hey guys, don't be weird about this, and be respectful because there is a real person behind the screen!"

everyone who goes too far with the "HES JUST A GUY" thing isn't helping. its like. yeah, hes just a guy, but that doesn't mean i cant have any sort of attachment to his music whatsoever??? some people's idea of treating people like real people is really just treating them worse than how they were being treated before 😭

The people who are policing the fandom too much aren't helping either, its getting really exhausting to keep seeing posts saying "oh he looks really good in this photo!" and seeing like 200 replies being like "STOP SEXUALIZING YOU CREEP!!!!" (although there are people who actually do sexualize him, (which is really gross and weird) but i digress,)

music based fandoms are usually very,,, eh.. but honestly most of the fandom isn't bad, its just the people who take things to the extremes (in both directions) who are kind of making it a bit more awkward.

i think the fandom, and his music as a whole shouldn't just be narrowed down to "gay neurodivergent weirdo music," but it should just be like. "music for cool people" or hell, just fuckin "music"

[metalhead-painter]

❝And we're gonna get high-igh-igh, when we're low, low, low. The fire burns from better days. And she screamed, "Why, oh, why?" I said, "I don't know" The catastrophic hymns from yesterday... Of misery❞

Hey! I'm Warren Taylor, I got tumblr because I was told it was a way to get my art out there, I've been lurking on the site for a while now but I've never really gotten the time to make an account. I am here now though. I'm a self proclaimed artist, I like to paint and sketch, I also love many forms of music, metal being my preferred genre, I don't play an instrument just yet but I'd love to learn how to play the drums, I think that'd be fun. I'm an absolute piercing maniac, with over 20 and counting, I'm moving onto tattoos pretty soon.. I'm a big motorbike fan and own a Harley of my own.. But! Moving on before I start rambling.

Enough about my interests, more about me. I'm 21, pansexual and go by he/him.. Though to be completely honest? Call me whatever, I do not mind. They/them? Go for it. ?! I'm chill with almost anything, though, I am a dude. Just don't try any funny stuff on here. Anyway! My blog is open for asks and discussion, I love to talk to others so just drop me an ask whenever.

Hey hey! Back at it again with another blog! This time an oc rp blog because I love Warren with all of my heart. If you don't know me, hi I'm Richie, I own @riotsnrebellion and @nintndo64, my main blog is @1nervegas1. I'm an 18 yr old gay trans man with a love of horror movies, video games and anything related to em!

This blog will have sexual themes, violence and gore spoken about on it, if that's not your thing? This blog isn't for you.

I am totally okay with shipping, that includes crackships, rarepairs and oc x canon, just dm me first or shoot me an ask to discuss everything.

Enough about me though, More about Warren! Warren is a jigsaw trap survivor, he struggles with both self harm, suicidal thoughts and a hard drug addiction, currently, he is attending a clinic to get over his addiction, attending the jigsaw survivors group and getting therapy. He works two jobs, one being a cashier at an old record store ran by a family friend, and the other as a server at a not so fancy restaurant. He lives in a shitty apartment with his dog, Mallow, and enjoys to watch local rock shows.

there will be more info to come! I'll be putting it in other posts though however to avoid making this one too long!

Yes his faceclaim is Dave Mustaine

TRAP INFO / BIO / PLAYLIST / PINTEREST BOARD / ART TAG

Tags that may be used on this blog!

-#🥁>RICHIE RAMBLES (ooc stuff)

-#🎨>WARREN MUSES (his thoughts/normal posts)

-#🎧>WARREN CONVERSES (interactions)

-#✏️>WARRENCORE (stuff that I associate with him)

-#🎵>WARREN REBLOGS (his reblogs)

-#<❗INFO❗> (info about warren, random stuff)

[iamyoursonly]

3AM (29/03/2024)

wrote this at 3am because i had a dream of him and i needed some hallucinations desperately <3 sorry for not posting for so long though, i had so many tests i could barely breathe :(

Late nights but no movie night, I’m just overworking myself, as I sit at the same spot for the 27th hour.

My tired eyes drag across the computer screen, lazy fingers typing the last few words with my keyboard to complete my long due essay. Headphones listening to pop music to keep my mind awake, well the unhealthy amount of caffeine also helped with that.

I take some freshly washed grapes that I previously prepared for myself and put one in my mouth, slowly chewing and getting a taste of how sweet the grapes are. Suddenly, my mind wanders to think of how it would feel like if there was someone to feed me grapes when I’m doing work.

I slap my face and take another sip of my coffee when my mind tries to wander away and think about that ‘homeless romantic’ crap again. I could’ve been doing that if my immature self didn’t choose to become a become a doctor. I just sigh and continue the essay.

Until I couldn’t, and I passed out on the table.

“My love? Are you alright?” A man whispered into my ear, his voice was so hot and addictive though. Complaining would be the last thing I would do honestly. But I had to get up and check who it was.

I open my eyes, slowly getting used to the light at my desk again, only to find the most beautiful man I have ever seen in my whole entire life. He was gorgeous as a greek god that only Zeus had crafted himself. His features as sharp as a knife, and he looked divine.

“Am I hallucinating?” I mumbled, and as if I said it out loud, the man whispered again. “No you’re not, sweetheart.”

Well I better be in heaven for working my butt off completing that stupid essay. Seeing that I’m face to face with this beautiful man, I’m 100% sure I spawned into the correct place after I died. So this is the after life, it’s not even half bad to be honest. Like just look at him, he must be my guardian angel that is on his way to guide me to the staircase to heaven. The staircase will definitely be as gorgeous as his eyes…

“Hello? Darling? Are you still with me?” He says again, and I leaned closer to admire his features. I whisper a soft “Yes, I am.” As I focus on his ocean blue eyes, and before I knew it, I was drowning in that ocean his eyes held. His eyes was blue like a beautiful sunny day, it was that shade of blue that everyone liked, and I couldn’t help but admiring them a little bit too much too.

“Earth to y/n?” He tries yet again, but this time I could just focus on how snowy white his hair was, it was as white as the whitest paint ever made, and it looked so beautiful and silky I couldn’t even describe how much I wanted to run my fingers through his hair.

As if he could read my mind, he grabbed my face and closed the distance between the two of us, and our faces were so close I could feel his breath… He can touch me! And I had to pinch myself to make sure I wasn’t hallucinating. I wasn’t. “Sir…?” I choked out, with his face so close to mine, I could barely control my pacing heartbeat, let alone my flushed expression. I could just stare into those captivating eyes of his and think about how beautiful he is… Honestly, even the most beautiful words cannot describe how spectacular he looks.

“Hey, are you okay?” he asked, and with us this close, I’m definitely not okay.

“May I ask who you are and why you’re here?” I ask, trying to put up a strong face, trying not to show my weak side.

“I’m Gojo Satoru,” he replies swiftly, without hesitation, “And I may come from the future but don’t freak out please. I’ll explain.”

I just look at him, not knowing how to react as my mind had suddenly gone blank from this shocking news. “Time travelling? That’s possible?”

He chuckled as if he knew how I would react, “How old are you, darling?”

“I’m 14.” I tell him, a bit curious about what he will tell me next. “I’m 29.” He tells me, “It’s 2024 right now, right? I was 16 during that time.”

It took quite a long moment of silence for me to process this new idea of time travelling that I never thought would happen in the near future. I just look at him and his smile as he moved away from me. The amount of questions I had started flooding my mind, I had to resist the urge to ask him all at once.

“So you’re in the year 2036?” I ask him, and I got my answer in a second.

“Actually 2037, it’s March right now, right? Well, I was born in December.” He said, with a smile.

“Why are you telling me all this? What do you want from me?” I started blurting out the questions I had in my mind for a while. And he just looked at me. “I just wanted to see if you met me yet, by that I meant my 16 year old self.”

“Huh?” I started to get confused, “What do you mean by that?”

“We’re dating, darling. In the future, and we’re engaged just last month in 2027.” He smiles, looking so happy I could almost know what to anticipate for the future, “You’re definitely the best thing that happened to me, I could see why I chose you as my wife.” I sat there in shock, not knowing the right words to say, but I felt a hot rush of heat on my face, I must’ve been blushing so hard when I heard him say that we will be engaged… I mean engaged with that man? What luck did I have to be able to pull him?!

“When will we start dating, may I ask?” I manage to choke out, and he laughs, making my face blush an even redder tone. Then he puts a finger up to his lips, as if telling me that it’s a secret, “Wait and see, it won’t be fun if I just spoil all the fun.”

His watch suddenly starts beeping really loudly, as if signalling him to go back, and I was right.

“Sorry darling,” he shows me his watch, and it shows that he had a minute left, “It’s time’s up for now, but I’ll see you later.” He just gave me a big hug and then he disappeared into thin air.

I still didn’t know how to react to that chain of information, I just sat still for a long time, so long that I could feel my butt hurting because of that. The wind blowing my curtains away from the touch of the windows, and that woke me up, that cold breeze of wind at night but with just a tiny bit of warmth to bring me the comfort I needed.

As if I needed something cold to continue this thinking, I head down the convenience store, in my silly pyjamas, I needed to get my daily doze of milk at 3am for better thinking. Not thinking that anyone would be there at 3am just like me, but I caught a glance of a tall guy with some snow white hair, and in that instant, I couldn’t stop my body from running towards that isle that he was in.

The tall guy turned to look at me, as I was panting from running so fast towards him, and he stared at me up and down, “Are you okay, miss?” I look at him, and I could see the sparkly ocean blue eyes I’ve just seen a moment before, but this person looked like a mini version of him — that Gojo guy. Even their voice sounded somewhat similar…

“I am, thanks for your concern.” I tell him, and he gave a slight smile before grabbing the last bottle of milk to the counter.

“Hey!” I call out to him, and he turned back to look at me, “What is it?” he says.

“I wanted that bottle too,” I say, a blush starting to creep up on my face, I think that explains the smirk on his face, “It might be weird asking but do you mind sharing?”

He just laughed out loud, breaking the silence in the air, and I just look at him with my blush creeping up my face so much faster than before. “So?” I ask again.

“I’ll just give you the bottle.” He tells me, then he heads to the counter to pay while I can’t even move my legs from embarrassment to stop him from paying for me. I simply stood in shock and waited for his return in the same position. He came back and gave me the bottle, I held onto the bottle tight and I maintained eye contact with him before he started leaving the store with both his hands in his pockets.

“Wait!” I call out, again, and he looks at me, “Would your name be Gojo Satoru?”

He didn’t necessarily respond but he did give just that tiny nod I needed to confirm, then he mouths the words, ‘I’ll see you later.’

master list

[jaehunnyy]

I know I love you

Genre: friends-to-lovers!au, fake-dating!au, angsty but with a happy ending, fluff (in the end)

Word count: 1k

Pairing: fake-boyfriend!Beomgyu x fem!reader

Requested by: anon (song: 0X1=LOVESONG - TXT)

Warnings: one kiss, usage of pet names (angel), a bit of a messed up situation, mentions of clubbing, mentions of Beomgyu being drunk (though he is sober enough), possible grammar mistakes

A/N: nonnie, im sorry it took so long to write this, but i am happy i got to finish it now. i changed the meaning of the lyrics a bit and i used them in different situations, so I hope you don't mind that too much. thank you! ✨️

__________________________________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐

The flashing lights and the loud music defining the club Beomgyu was in were nothing new for the boy. The reason why he kept ending there? Very familiar as well. He often wondered what made him accept fake dating you, because instead of becoming closer, he felt like you were distancing more with every passing day. And still, it was his mistake, because he accepted the deal when you offered to help him with making the girl he loved jealous—not realising that you were supposed to make yourself jealous in this case. And once again, the memories have started to kick in.

"Hey, Gyu!" you shouted, gently nudging his shoulder: "I heard you're in love, hmmm?"

His eyes widened at your question, and the panic made his vision blurry. There was no way you found out, was it?

"Uhm, well, you see—"

"I can help you with that, Gyu! I know you are way too shy to confess, so I have a plan for that. Let's fake date!"

"I don't want to use you for that… you are much more than a rebound for me, Y/N…"

“I offered to do that, and I will be here for you, always. Let's do that, Gyu. Please, use me like a drug."

Let's fake date. Please, use me like a drug. He would have never imagined that he would be in such a situation, but if he said no, you would keep on asking questions, and he would expose himself; so he chose to say yes.

Already tired of the place he spent his last hour in and the aching memory of his mistake, he took his leather jacket and started walking slowly to your house, because even with his foggy mind, he knew you'd always let him in. You were his fake girlfriend, after all. He also took advantage of the silence on the street, engulfed by the pressure of his thoughts, until he reached your welcoming house. One knock, and you were already in front of him, the same, worried look plastered on your face.

"Did you get drunk again…?" you sighed, before letting him come inside.

"No, 'm not drunk," he said, an innocent smile stretching his lips softly: "just missed you."

You gave him a bitter smile, because in the end, you were not the girl he loved, (or so you thought).

"Is this part of our deal?"

"Missing you? No, Y/N, 'm honest with youuuu!" he laughed, clinging into you like a little kid.

You had enough of this painful pretending.

"Gyu… let's end this."

Was he not sober enough, so that he started to hear things? There's no way you would end things like this, right? Did he do something wrong?

"What? What about the girl I like?"

"You don't need me to pull her, Beomgyu. Once you do, you will be happy, and I will keep on hurting myself. It's over."

He felt the need to laugh, you couldn't be serious. It was toxic, but he was addicted.

"Are you saying that I'm the one hurting you, when you did that to yourself?" he asked, hands shaking in anger. Why did you blame him?

"Yes." you simply stated, arms crossed in front of your chest.

"Then why the fuck did you offer to help me one month ago?"

"Because I love you, Gyu. And I would rather have you as my fake boyfriend than not having you at all, but it has become an all or nothing situation, and I want all of you."

You did all of this—because you loved him too? All this messed up situation, for him to find out that you were crushing on each other?

"Y/N… you were the girl I liked. When you found out that I have a crush, I panicked and… I didn't want to give myself away, so I chose to say yes to your plan, even though it made no sense."

You looked at him with glossy eyes, giving up and squishing him into a big hug. There was no point in fighting more, the situation was already messed up. You were convinced he wouldn't remember any of this in the morning, but you wanted to use this opportunity, just this time.

"Gyu, look at me. If you remember this in the morning, kiss me. If not, let's both forget about this."

Even though he was sober enough to think rationally, he played your game once again.

"Deal."

The next morning came with such small steps, that you felt trapped in a never ending loop. Since you didn't have a lot of space in your one-person apartment, you had no choice but to let Beomgyu sleep next to you, his hands holding you close to him all night. You opened your eyes and saw him already looking at you, lips curling in happiness at the sight of you.

"Morning, Y/N!" he cheerfully said, stroking your back softly.

"Morning, Gyu. How do you feel?"

"Amazing, actually. What about you?"

"I'm… alright…" you whispered, trying to understand why he didn't act sick after his drunk state the other day; though, the boy had something else in mind.

He gently cupped your cheek with his hands, pressing his soft lips on yours. The kiss took you off guard, but you didn't lose any more time and kissed him back, full of feelings and love. You felt him smile, pressing his forehead on yours and looking at you softly.

"Say you love me, Y/N. That's all I want to hear right now. Say you love me till the end of the world."

"I love you, Gyu. I love you, and I'm so happy you remembered."

"I love you too, angel, I always did." he said, then pressed a sweet kiss on your cheek.

In the end, everything turned out to be worth it, as you ended up having your own happy ending story, next to the boy you've adored more than anything.

[bi-bard]

You'll Always Be a Flower on my Skin and the Pain that I Am In - Daisy Jones Imagine [Daisy Jones & the Six]

Title: You'll Always Be a Flower on my Skin and the Pain that I Am In

Pairing: Daisy Jones X Reader

Based On: Your Needs, My Needs

Word Count: 1,812 words

Warning(s): LOOK HERE! addiction, unhealthy relationship, overdose, mention of sexual assault

Summary: (Y/n) and Daisy are two broken people that had learned to rely on each other. However, at what point does support become reliance? When does helping become enabling? What do you do when the person that probably saved you becomes the very reason that you haven't been able to save yourself?

Author's Note: THIS IS IMPORTANT! This is a story that I've been wanting to tell for a while, not specifically about this character, but in general. I've hesitated for a very long time out of fear of a variety of things. It is a heavy story and if you have any history with addiction (yourself or your friends/family/etc.), then I would advise that you skip this one. Thank you.

STICK SEASON (WE'll ALL BE HERE FOREVER) WRITING CHALLENGE MASTERLIST

----------------------

When I first met Daisy, we were in the crowd at the same concert.

We were both young and stupid kids trying to escape whatever was waiting for us outside of the venue that night.

I felt as if we stuck to each other. Two eyes always meant to lock. Meant to dance together, sing together. No matter what had happened before each of us walked into that room and what happened once we left, we were always meant to be stuck together.

We continued to grow through those concerts. We'd meet outside and find a way to sneak inside. We saw every show that we could get into.

Daisy was better at that than I was. She always had a charm about her. I would happily run in right behind her. Mostly because she usually had my hand clasped in hers anyway.

Being with Daisy was the first time that I felt truly accepted. I thought it had been the music and the crowds around me, but it was all her. She was this beacon of light for me. A lighthouse. I wasn't scared around her. I was more energetic. I was happier. For the time in my life, I had someone that I could truly find joy with.

We saw each other laugh and cry and go through these different moments and phases. I still remember when she told me her new name... her proper name. Daisy Jones.

I knew why she changed it, but she never talked about it. Neither one of us did. Our friendship was an escape from the shitty parts of the world, not a reminder.

And so, we continued. We continued going to shows and meeting these interesting people.

We were both in our late teens when Daisy came running up to me with a smile and a drink in her hand. We were at some party for some band that was admittedly shit.

She wrapped her arm around me as she excitedly yelled my name.

"Hi," I chuckled at her behavior.

"Try this," she held her cup out to me.

"Why," I asked.

"Because it's great," she explained simply.

"Are you..." I leaned forward, acting as if anyone here would truly care. "Are you drunk?"

"What? Nooo!" she shook her head. "Now, try this, please!"

That night, we both ended up stumbling onto my family's back patio. We laid on the wood and stared up at the sky. It was a new kind of escape for both of us. A true disconnect from all of the weight and fear and stress.

It was exactly what we needed.

"I wanna be a star," Daisy said quietly after a while.

I turned my head to her. "You will be."

She looked at me. "I know."

I chuckled.

"I'll bring you along with me," she promised. "Wherever I go, you go. Recording and performing. You can be backstage for every performance. All while you write that fancy book of yours."

"I'll write my book on you," I replied. "You'll be the main character. The star of the show. Just like you already are."

"I like the sound of that," she muttered. She reached over and grabbed my hand. "We are gonna do some great things, (Y/n) (Y/l/n)."

"Yes, we are, Daisy Jones."

We kept going. Going and going.

Drinking turned into experimenting with drugs that Daisy would score from some guy that she knew.

And no matter how out of control we ever got, we were doing great work. We were finding stories and words and sentences that neither one of us ever knew we were looking for.

It was perfect.

She kept her promise.

I was dragged to every party. Every concert she ever attended. I met everyone that she did. We became known as a duo. A reputation. We had a reputation. It was funny to think about even then.

I was there when we realized that her lyrics had been stolen. That guy was an absolute prick, by the way.

I was there when she performed at Simone Jackson's show.

I remember trying to talk her into taking Teddy Price's offer. She refused. She hated the idea of being put in some small box.

I got dragged to the studio when she recorded her first song with the Dunne Brothers.

I was there when they become Daisy Jones & the Six.

We were parts of every single major life event. We witnessed our personal histories. I knew her story like the back of my hand. She could probably recite mine in an album; a song dedicated to the

And I thought that it was a good thing. Daisy did too.

I didn't think about the true nature of our friendship before Daisy ran off before she ran off and got married before the tour started.

It was like being forced to look at old pictures of yourself. You could see the wrinkles that you didn't notice developing over the slow course of time. You could see the dramatic change in height. You could see how your face changed and sharpened.

I was suddenly forced to see how time had changed us. We still fit, but we were deteriorating. Crumbling. All that was truly holding either one of us together was the drinking and the drugs. And we both wanted to claim that it was art.

I continued claiming that it was all due to the art.

Through all of the tour dates and the messes. The fights and the yelling. God, it got so loud with both Daisy and Billy there.

And then, Daisy almost overdosed.

That was when it felt like everything suddenly stopped.

Nicky- Daisy's husband- had run for it. Billy found me in the bathroom trying to help her as I hyperventilated and shook and cried. He took her from me. I curled up against a different wall, just watching silently.

And I realized that I couldn't do it anymore.

I wasn't even thinking about getting myself treated. I didn't think that I could get better. But Daisy... she could do amazing things. I couldn't watch her fall apart anymore.

I packed the next day.

She didn't notice me packing my bags while she was ranting and pacing my room. She was still so angry and upset about Nicky. I understood that. I would have been pissed.

I was only scared of what happened when that anger was aimed at me.

"What are you doing," she finally asked.

"I... I'm leaving," I admitted, staring down at the bag.

"Now?"

"Yeah."

"Why?"

"I need to."

She scoffed. "Does this really seem like the best time to do this?"

"Yes."

"I just almost fucking died-"

"That's why I have to do this now!"

I finally turned to look at her. We stood in complete silence for the longest time. Just staring at each other.

The worst part was that she was amazing. She was everything that I wanted to be. Confident and clever and funny and just... everything. But I could see that if I continued to see her that way, then I would never be able to help her.

"You're just gonna fucking abandon me?" she muttered. "After everything we've been through? All these years? All because I screwed up?"

"Daisy, we are both screwed up people," I corrected. I felt the tears welling up in my eyes as my voice started shaking. "Neither one of us is fucking healthy. For ourselves or for each other. And I know that you could be amazing. You can be so much better. But if I stay, then I will always be in the way of what you could become. You will never get better with me around."

"You don't know that-"

"But I do. I really do. I have watched both of us try to get better and be better and it has never worked. I am a weight on your back, Daisy. I am a constant reminder... I would always pull you back and we both know that. And I'm sorry that it's taken me so long to realize it. I'm sorry-"

"Stop acting like this is an act of fucking kindness!" she snapped at me. "You are selfish! You are running from the mess! What is it really? Tell me! Is it because of what I'm doing while you can't get a fucking word published? Is that it? Some weird, pent-up jealousy?"

"Daisy, no," I shook my head. "If I stay, then we will both continue on this fucking path. There are two ways that ends: we despise each other or one of us fucking dies!"

Her jaw clenched.

I felt sick to my stomach.

"Well, you don't have to wait," she forced a smirk. One of those angry smirks that would rest on her face to hide her anger or sadness. She had never pointed that smirk at me. "I already fucking despise you, so you can fucking go whenever your bags are packed. Have a nice life!"

She stormed out a few moments later. I flinched a bit as the door slammed shut behind her.

I put a hand over my mouth as I finally broke down sobbing.

I sat down next to my bag for a moment.

The weight of the moment sat on my shoulders and held me there.

I lost the one most constant thing in my life. I lost the person that I found the most joy with.

And it was my fault.

--

"What happened after you left?"

I blinked a few times and looked at Julia- the young woman that was interviewing me. She was Camila's daughter.

I hadn't kept much contact with everyone around the band, but Camila had tried. She sent me a letter after my book had been published. It felt wrong to reject her daughter's request.

"I... I went home," I replied. "To my parents' place. They helped me find treatment and get back on my feet. After that, I got my book published. I kind of just... forced myself to keep going."

"You never reached out to Daisy?"

"It felt like too much of a risk. And I never thought that she'd want to hear from me."

"Oh," she murmured.

"I always wanted to," I explained. "I did. I just... I couldn't."

She nodded, pausing for a moment before speaking up, "If it's any comfort at all... Daisy's the one that asked me to talk to you."

"Really?"

Julia nodded again, a grin spreading on her face. "She wanted me to mention how much she loved your books."

"Oh," I felt a smile pulling at my lips at the idea.

"I don't think she despises you as much as she used to."

I looked down at my lap for a moment. "I hope so."

If that were the case, it made everything feel like it was much more worth it.

----------------------

Author's Note: I cried while writing the last half of this. Just in case y'all were wondering about the toll that this story took on me.

----------------------

Navigation Guide

What I Write For

Some Original Characters

[hyunjinbiased-blog]

Addicted (Dead Island 2 Ryan x Gen Reader)

You and Ryan stumble across his old place of work, and he treats you to a private show.

Warning sexy times alluded to but not shown and a piss poor description of a strip show and lap dance

Big shout out to @brunos-wife360 for giving me the opening paragraphs and for allowing me to use them

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

●●Y/N's POV●●

Walking along the desolated streets of Hell-A me and my boyfriend Ryan were looking at the different buildings that were once places of entertainment.

As we continued our path along the asphalt, me and Ryan stopped in our tracks.

I looked up and saw a sign that read ‘the big hose’ which I knew from Ryan was where he worked as an exotic dancer before the outbreak.

Ryan’s cheeks flushed a red hue upon looking at the sign, when we both looked at Each other, not speaking a single word.

“The horde might catch up to us soon and as much as I hate to say it, we should seek shelter in here” Ryan said as he started to approach the main door.

Following him inside I was greeted by a wall with all of the dancers on it, and right in the centre in a gold frame was a picture of Ryan with the words "Best Dancer in house" under it.

"Y/N, can you please stop staring at my stripper photo and help me secure the doors and windows" Ryan said breaking me out of my trance.

After making sure that our makeshift shelter was secure for the night we made our way towards the bar area hoping to find some food and drinks to take back to Emma's in the morning.

●●Timeskip●●

A couple of hours after arriving me and Ryan had been drinking from one of the bottles that we found. Being slightly tipsy I started to approach one of the poles that was in the middle of the main stage.

"I always joked when I was a teen that if I didn't have a job by the time I was 25 I'd become a stripper" I said as I wrapped my hand around the pole. I felt myself slip after an attempt at spinning went wrong, Ryan got up on the stage and caught me by my waist before I could fall,

"Why don't you leave the dancing to the professional baby" Ryan said as he guided me back into the chair that he was previously sat in before he made his way back onto the stage.

"What are you doing?" I asked as he got the dj's station running.

"I am going to give you a private show darling" he replied as the music started.

Seeing Ryan dance was incredible, the way he twisted his body around the pole to the beat of the song playing was hypnotic. I was sat on the edge of the chair trying to get a better look when suddenly he started crawling towards me on his hands and knees.

"Now there are a few rules that you can't break, if you do I stop ok?" He asked and all I could do was nod my head yes.

"Good, now first rule is no touching, second rule is no biting, you may feel tempted to but don't and finally enjoy yourself baby" he said as the song that was playing stopped and changed to a slower song.

Having Ryan so close to me but not being able to touch him was hard, he swayed and gyrated his hips in front of me and all I could think about was grabbing him and forcing his hips to mine as he slowly started to remove his clothing.

Once the song was over and a new one started I gave up on following the rules and wrapped my arms around his neck as he dipped down in front of me.

"What did I say baby, no touching" Ryan said as he tried to remove my arms.

"As much as I am enjoying this, I'd rather do something else" I said as I bit his earlobe.

He paused before turning around to face me, "that can be arranged."

●●Timeskip●●

The club smelt of sweat and sex as me and Ryan laid on one of the couches, our bodies stuck together.

"Is that how a dance normally ends for you?" I asked while trying to find my clothes.

"Na, I don't normally sleep with clients but I make an acception for you baby" Ryan said after getting dressed.

Once we were both dressed, I went to the window to check to see if the music had drawn in any zombies. Just as I was about to tell Ryan that the coast was clear, a hand banged on the glass.

"Oi love birds quit shagging and come out" we heard Jacob yell from outside. Me and Ryan looked at each other before bursting out laughing.

Opening the door to the club we were greeted by Jacob, Dani and Bruno, that latter was flipping his knife with a grin on his face.

"Enjoy your private dance Y/N?" Bruno asked me as we walked down the street towards the checkpoint that would take us back to Bel-Air.

"Let's just say I'm now addicted to the way he moves"

[strawberryblondebutch]

This is my grand introduction

ABOUT ME

I go by Kiera, although I'll also respond to Ghost or River, as those have been my internet or IRL nicknames for well over a decade at this point. I use she/her pronouns and I'm a 24-year-old white cisgender lesbian based out of Philadelphia, Pennsylvania (aka the greatest city in the world, and I will hear no arguments to the contrary). My chronically offline fiancée is referred to here as "Mrs. Kiera" to protect her privacy.

I currently work in the tabletop role-playing game content and design space, but this is a stopgap before I go to law school to become a professional sports agent. Other industries in which I've worked or interned include music journalism, technical theatre, public school teaching, behavioral ecology, and literary criticism. My favorite thing is to hop from one dying field to another.

I'm pretty openly bipolar. Despite being on a good treatment plan, I still suffer from routine changes to my mood that impact my daily life. I'm happy to answer questions about my experience with BP2 or other health concerns if asked politely.

MY CONTENT

At this point, I'm not really in a fandom space. This is just the site where I scream into the void (and occasionally the void answers back). If you do associate me with a fandom, it's probably either Stranger Things or Scream. Like most people, I suffer from a few minor curses: I'm always in the worst line at the grocery store, technology likes to break around me, and I ship only the rarest of femslash pairs. This is my burden, and like Sisyphus, you must imagine me happy.

Other content that catches my fancy include comic books, emo music, sports, and Philly culture. My favorite bands are The Wonder Years, Say Anything, and Fireworks. My favorite athletes are Emily Clark, Taylor Heise, Brandon Marsh, Travis Konecny, and Tyrese Maxey.

Because of my job, I am also relegated to forever DM, but I have a few characters I routinely play. Rhaelara Rynwalsdottir is my pathetic wet cat paladin werewolf. Katya Volkova is like Evelyn Carnahan mixed with Daphne Kluger. I'm also working on some fiction works and love to talk about my lesbian werewolf OCs.

CAN I TALK TO YOU ABOUT...?

Yes, always. Ask me anything. If I'm having a bad brain day, I may not respond immediately, but that doesn't mean I don't want to hear about things like:

The Ronance hockey AU

Zatanna Zatara, pathetic bisexual meow meow

Why are all ginger lesbians such girlflops?

Emo, punk, and hardcore culture

The eternal pain of being a Philly sports fan

The latest stupid way I've gotten myself hurt

WHERE ELSE CAN I FIND YOU?

Legend has it that if you go to a basement hardcore show in South Philadelphia on the night of the full moon, you'll see a red-blonde werewolf absolutely tearing that shit up in the pit. Other than that, I'm also on AO3 as ClawedLoupGiroux.

BYF/DNI

TERFs and Nazi punks fuck off.

If you don't believe that addicts should be treated with compassion and care, I wish you a very die.

Trans men are men, and lesbians are not attracted to men. Do not ship trans men with lesbians or I will give you rabies.

I have the scary disorders your parents warned you about and sometimes they make me scary.

Despite it all, I remain a practicing Catholic. You keep your beliefs and I keep mine, eh?

Minors can follow, just don't be weird about it.

[kaddyssammlung]

From my run this morning

TW: mental health talk

A few days ago an old friend of mine asked me something via WhatsApp. We had a short talk and that was it. The thing is that is not any old friend.....nononononon we are talking about my old favorite person. I obsessed over her from when I was 16 to 18. She was my one and only. When she was sad, I was even more sad. When she did not talk to me, I would use this as an invitation to do unhealthy things to myself and so. One of those “typical” BPD relationships.

Her messaging me made me think about her and I've been feeling weird ever since. It triggers me and all “you should keep away from everyone because you are evil and abusive and horrible” type of thinking. Oh well....yes. But I'm not 16 anymore and I learned a lot.

Anyway.

This morning I was running. The weather was okay. The air smelled so good. I'm so addicted to the way the air smells at the moment. It smells like summer and I really like that.

My legs felt good but my mood kept getting worse and worse. I started crying and got really angry. “Why am I crying?! Everything should be fine, right?! What the hell is going on? What's wrong this time?”

This reminded me of something. I often had the problem that I no idea what was going on with me. I just started crying and could not stop. This happened in school quite often. My friend, that I just talked about, always got so angry with me for doing this. And then I was sad because my fave person was mad at me.

It's a vicious cycle....

This makes me think about something that I wrote a while ago about that "bpd-thing" where you don't know what you feel because you really can't. You just can't. You lost the ability....

I got really mad this morning. I wanted to hurt myself. And now?! I'm exhausted. The run was good but a lot of vertical climbs and I'm just so damn exhausted that I want to sleep.

Listen to sad music and weep?! Oh yes....

[symbioticsimplicity]

What are some Hazbin Hotel/ Helluva Boss head canons you wanna share? (Yes, I AM asking for you to ramble to your heart's content about the blorbos!)

I love you so much. 💚💚💚💚💚💚

This got real long so its going under a read more.

Hazbin Headcanons:

The sigils that float around Alastor when he uses magic are not actually a part of his powerset. They're part of the leash on him.

Lilith is not in Heaven relaxing, she's spying on them

Husk hasn't preened his wings properly in years and its actually a big part of why he's so goddamn grouchy

Lucifer has the same problem but make it part of why he's so depressed

Charlie has wings but even she doesn't know that yet

Alastor DOES have a deer tail but he either keeps it hidden inside his pants so it can never been seen or continually removes it

Angel can in fact spin webs but hates to because its fucking weird and instinctual and he does not like having his thorax out

Angel is venomous

Contracts by nature nerf the sinner they're attached to unless otherwise specified, and by that logic almost every member of the Hazbin cast are significantly stronger than they're aware of. With the exception of Husk, who held onto his power, and Alastor who knows EXACTLY how much power he's missing.

Valentino legitimately loves Vox but it isn't mutual (the IRONY)

Velvette doesn't change hairstyles, she changes her whole head

Lucifer’s blood is both addictive and toxic to demons in the long term. It tastes like apple cider and FIRE

Alastor absolutely hates it, he tried it once and it was far too sweet for him

Music is ACTUALLY a legitimate form of magic in the Hellaverse and particularly powerful because it can have unintended effects and it is irresistable.

Alastor IS redeemable (ask me about this only if you want the essay)

Helluva Boss Headcanons:

Millie was a prison guard at the jail Moxxie and Blitzø met through.

Octavia's powerset is routed in precognition, but she hasn't begun to explore it enough yet to have realized that

I don't think this is a headcanon exactly but I'm manifesting Loona/Tex/Bee

Fizz tops

Verosika still has lingering feelings towards Blitz and she is PISSED about it

Stolas has been watching that same soap opera since he was a kid

Literally none of the other sins like Mamon its not just Ozzie

MOST of the sins are cool with each other, or at the very least like coworkers about things

Its possible to BECOME a Sin since in this verse they're not fallen angels

The current sins are (mostly) not the original demons to hold those titles

Blitz's Dad is still alive

Striker is demi and TIRED.

If he had taken the deal, Striker actually would have followed through with what he'd told Blitzø

At the circus, Blitzø didn't actually have a room (was given to Fizz though he wasn't originally angry about it) and often times he slept in their horse stable. The horses would let him sleep on them and its a big part of why he loves them so much

Fizz also fucking hates Blitzø's Dad

The agent that got possessed can now see demons as they are despite glamoring

Blitzø is actually genuinely hilarious he just has this issue where if he TRIES to be funny he CANNOT do it.

Moxxie doesn't cuss because his Dad cusses A LOT and he sounds too much like him when he does

Millie is one of those people who is good at literally anything they try the first ir second try and it pisses off both Blitzø and Moxxie, but Moxxie at least tries to hide it because he loves her.

Loona is ticklish as FUCK but if anyone ever learns that, they die

Octavia actually wishes she had a sibling

Millie is the only person who doesn't think Striker is all that hot and does not understand the hype

[mimisempai]

Addicted to your softness

Summary

Crowley overhears a conversation between Maggie and Nina and learns from them how Shaw spoke to his angel.

Notes

If you look at that scene when Shax mocks Aziraphale's love of food, his softness, look at Aziraphale's face and you'll be heartbroken like me.

On Ao3

Rating G -  1562 words

At Aziraphale's request, Crowley was on his way to pick up a classical music record that the angel had ordered from Maggie. As he walked through the door of the record store, Crowley realized that Maggie wasn't there and was about to call out to her when he heard a voice.

"Nina, I assure you, I'm fine."

Crowley was torn between leaving and staying to tell his angel some gossip.

"But as for this demon, I no longer know their name -"

"Shax."

Shax? Why were they talking about Shax?

"Yes, Shax, what they said to you was extremely hurtful. And I don't want you to think that..."

Maggie's voice interrupted her, "Nina, everything you told me was stuff I've heard before. But I know who I am and what I'm worth. What hurts me more is what they said to Mr. Fell."

"He said you could call him Aziraphale."

They talked about his Aziraphale?

"Yes, Aziraphale. I think he seemed more affected by what they said to him than I was."

Crowley couldn't stand it any longer and joined them in the back room, "What did Shax say to him?"

Both women gasped and Maggie hesitated.

Crowley insisted, "Tell me everything."

Maggie replied quietly, "I don't remember the exact words, but they insisted he was soft, mocked the fact that he liked to eat so much, and asked if they should get him some sushi, and Mr. - Aziraphale looked almost sad for a moment.

That bitch, Crowley thought, feeling anger well up inside him on behalf of Aziraphale.

"Hey, you're not going to pull that lightning trick again, are you?"

Nina's voice snapped him out of his spiral and he shook his head. The coffee shop owner then asked him gently, "Do you need any coffee, like 6 shots of espresso?"

Crowley shook his head, "No, on the other hand, I want six of your biggest Eccles Cakes, if you've got any left."

Nina nodded, kissed Maggie on the cheek, and said to Crowley, "Come on, I'll give you this."

As they walked to the coffee shop, Nina asked him, "Are you going to be okay?"

Crowley replied, "Yeah... no... I hate the idea of him... anyway, let's just say his last employer never really treated him right, even though he never did anything wrong, so..."

Nina nodded, "I know, even if Maggie and I aren't, weren't, well, anyway, when that old witch talked to her like that, if it hadn't been a demon, I don't know if I could have held back. So I can only imagine now that you and he..."

"Yeah." Crowley replied simply as they reached the coffee shop. Nina quickly disappeared behind the counter and returned with a plate of Eccles cakes, which she handed to Crowley, saying, "This is on me. Take good care of him."

Crowley nodded and stomped out of the coffee shop, heading straight for the bookshop.

As he entered, he spotted Aziraphale standing in front of one of the shelves and called to him, "Angel, may I tempt you to a little snack?" 

As the Angel turned, he showed him the plate of cakes, pleased to see his eyes brighten as he nodded eagerly.

Crowley asked, "Isn't Muriel here?"

Aziraphale shook his head as he followed, "No, while studying the books they came across a compendium of the city's monuments and expressed a desire to explore the city."

"Oh, very well," Crowley replied, placing the plate of cakes on the small table, "Sit down and I'll bring you a cup of tea."

"Oh, you're an angel, thank you."

Crowley turned and replied with a cheeky smile, "No, angel, that's you."

He heard the angel chuckle as he entered the small kitchen to prepare the tea. 

A few moments later, he returned to Aziraphale with the tea and sat down next to him after placing the cup in front of him.

He handed the plate to Aziraphale, who greedily grabbed the cake and lifted it to his mouth.

Crowley couldn't help but smile at the various sounds of pleasure the angel made as he tasted the cake.

"What's the matter?" the angel asked, looking confused as he finished the first cake.

Crowley shook his head, "Nothing's wrong," then handed him the plate.

Aziraphale picked up another cake and asked with a smile, "Are you afraid I'm not eating enough?"

Crowley replied, "Nothing of the sort, angel, I just want you to eat what you feel like."

Having just bitten into the cake, Aziraphale smiled back, "That's sweet of you, but also a little strange."

I want you to forget what that idiot said to you.

"Crowley, my dear, I find you a little weird. Not that I dislike your attentions, but I have a strange feeling. Is something wrong?"

Crowley shook his head and replied, "No, nothing, eat."

The angel frowned and said in a falsely scolding tone, "Crowley...no lies between us. I sense there's something on your mind. I may often be oblivious, but I can see that you're upset about something."

Crowley sighed and replied, "I just heard from Maggie what Shax said to you that night.

Aziraphale looked puzzled at first, then Crowley caught the moment when the demon's words came back to his mind and immediately saw the angel's expression as he shrugged and said softly, "It's nothing I haven't heard before, at least Hell and Heaven are connected on this."

Confused, Crowley asked, "What do you mean?"

Aziraphale explained, "It's nothing much, Gabriel used to chastise me too for eating human food and that it made me soft." He unconsciously ran his hand over his stomach, but Crowley saw it and grabbed it, saying, "You know that's crap, don't you?"

"Well..." Aziraphale breathed, looking away, "for two people to be talking about it, there must be something to it."

Crowley grabbed his chin and turned his head toward him, saying in a firm voice, "I'm telling you, it's crap. It's coming from two people who are incapable of enjoying life -even if that's no longer true for his former royal smugness. You know, watching you eat is one of my favorite things, Angel?"

The angel shook his head gently, "How could it be?"

He gently ran his thumb over the angel's lips and replied, "When you eat, you look absolutely delighted, you're the picture of bliss, and I don't see the angel anymore, I only see you, Aziraphale. You don't hold back, and it's like seeing you fly on your own wings, if you'll allow me the metaphor. Forget what they told you, both of them. Don't be ashamed of who you are. Yes, you're soft, but so what?"

Crowley wrapped his arms around Aziraphale's waist and pressed his cheek against his stomach before continuing, "I like that softness, and I wouldn't have you any other way. And besides, it's all mine now."

He felt the angel laugh softly against him, then felt his hands settle into his hair, forcing him to lift his head.

Aziraphale leaned toward him and said softly, his voice trembling slightly, "Thank you..."

"Thank you for what, Angel?"

The angel replied softly, "For always telling me what I need to hear. Always."

On the wall, after telling the demon how he had given away his flaming sword, Aziraphale worried, "I hope I didn't do the wrong thing.

The demon looked at him, smiled, and said gently, "Oh, you're an angel. I don't think you can do the wrong thing."

********

Aziraphale said in a desperate voice, "I lied. To thwart the will of God."

Crawley nodded and replied in a gentle tone, "Yes, you did, but... I won't tell anyone," then turning to him, he added, " Are you?"

Aziraphale didn't answer, so the demon continued, "No. Then nothing has to change, does it?"

Aziraphale sat down on the bench and asked, lost, "But what am I?"

Crawley replied comfortingly, "You're just an angel who goes along with Heaven as far as he can.”

Crowley straightened and, cupping the Angel's face in his hands, replied gently, "Angel, I've never told you anything but the truth, nothing more. Just as I'm telling you today. I want to keep seeing you enjoy what you love. I want to keep seeing your eyes light up when you see a dessert that should be banned for its sugar content. I want to keep hearing you marvel because you've just discovered a new restaurant. Because that's who you are, and that's who I love."

When he heard Aziraphale gasp, Crowley realized what he had just said and didn't regret it, knowing it was the perfect moment. He leaned in to kiss the angel, but Aziraphale shook his head and pushed him a little, "W-Wait, Crowley!"

Crowley replied, "Don't even bother asking me if I'm sure, because..."

"I love you too, you idiot!"

"Oh..."

They stared at each other in silence for a few seconds before bursting out laughing. Only they could have this kind of declaration of love, chaotic and messy, but so them in the end.

When they had calmed down, Aziraphale repeated more softly, "I love you."

Crowley didn't answer, closing the distance and pressing his lips to the angel's in a kiss that celebrated a love that had been sown many millennia ago, that had taken time to grow and was finally blossoming into the light.

_________

Still not beta'd

Still not my native language

Still hoping you'll enjoy this story  🥰

Still thanking you for bearing with me 😝

Ineffable Growing Love series : here (After season 2)

Ineffable Husbands masterlist : here (Before season 2)