#yes i am using he/him for eri here

[number1villainstan]

Teen Eri, going in for top surgery: are you gonna like...count down from ten Chisaki, the surgeon, looking down on him: nope. goodbye Eri waking up after: wait what

[nocasdatsgay]

A Lesson in Heartbreak

Part 3 of 3: Where You’re Supposed to Be

Pairing: Azriel/Eris/Reader!F | Rating: T | word count: 6458

Neapolitan Bonds Masterlist | Part 2 | Read on AO3 Here

Summary: Eris and Azriel talk. You come back to Autumn and the three of you have to face each other and mend the heartbreak between you.

Warnings: Angst with a happy ending, Depressive thoughts, reconciliation.

A/N: Hi… this is a long time coming. I was depressed and this was emotionally hard to write. I apologize for taking so long. I doubt it will come off as angsty as it felt writing it but I finished it. I hope you all enjoy it.

Tagging: (I am hoping I got everyone): @myromanempiree @pit-and-the-pen @lilah-asteria @crazylokonugget @st4r-girl-official @thisblogisaboutabook @paleidiot @div94 @tele86 @chaos-on-stand-bi @bobbyisbored @ysmtttty @romantasyreader28 @azrielsshadows42 @stargirlrchive @scarsandallaz @paintedbyshadows @dream-alittlebiggerdarling @acourtofbatboydreams @ninthcircleofprythian @secret-third-thing @theicarustoyourcertainty2 @hieragalbatorixdottir @daycourtofficial @prythianpages

Eris woke with a pounding headache. His forehead throbbed so hard he could barely open his eyes. He also felt a weight over him that wasn’t a blanket. Despite the pain, he forced his eyes open. Beside him was Az, still seemingly asleep. Eris didn’t want to wake him but also didn’t want to lie there much longer. Of course when he moved out from under him, Azriel made a noise, his wings closing and he looked over at him. 

“Morning,” he whispered and rubbed his eyes. 

“Morning.” Eris groaned as he pushed himself up. He was silent for a moment and whispered, “I thought I dreamt you came back.” 

“Of course I came back.” He looked over and saw Azriel rubbing his own eyes. “I didn’t even drink and I feel like shit. Where’s that tonic Edith makes?” 

Eris gave him a withered look. “There would be some in the cabinet if someone didn’t take it every time they felt terrible.” Az rolled onto his back and glared at him but didn’t respond. “I’ll get some brought up.” 

“Then we talk.” 

Eris tried not to wince when Az said that as he got out of bed. He simply nodded. It was the least he could do. Eris looked down at himself and realized he was still in yesterday’s clothes. He would need the bed changed and made up before you came back- if you came back. Head still pounding, he grabbed a sheet of paper and wrote a note to Edith, sending it away with magic. By the time he had returned from the bath and changed, there was a tonic waiting for him on the table. Az seemed to have taken his, if the empty bottle next to it was any indication. 

Eris took it and sighed as the pounding faded, leaving him with a mental clarity and a knot in his stomach. He went over to the table and wrote another quick note to Rowen, asking to take over whatever meetings he had for the next few hours. The paper returned with a quick confirmation and Eris braced himself to leave the bed chambers. Az was waiting in the sitting room, looking out the window from his chair. Eris couldn’t remember the last time he felt like this- nervous; a foreign word to someone who has been through what he had these past centuries. He took a seat across from Az and waited. There was a moment of silence between them, before Az finally looked over at him. 

“Did you mean what you said?”

Eris forced himself to look him in the eyes. “Yes.” 

The hurt on Azriel’s face made his chest ache. He shuffled in his chair, wings behind him tightening into his back. 

“I would have never asked for any of that if I had-“ 

“I know,” Eris said quickly. 

The pain in Az’s gaze did not lessen. “Why didn’t you say something?” 

“I can’t bring myself to tell you no. You were so enamored with the idea of a third mate. I eventually became numb to it.” 

Azriel’s eyes searched his own, a question without asking. “You regret it.” 

He shook his head. “Regret isn’t the word I would use.”

“Then what do you call it?” Az snapped back. 

Eris opted for honesty. “I thought you’d leave.” Az went very still. “Elain said there was a third bond. She never said it was for both of us. I was shocked when it snapped for me too.” 

“Why would you think that?” 

“I didn’t deserve a second mate.”

“And I do?” Az’s voice raised, still dumbfounded at what Eris was saying. 

“More than me.” He shrugged. “You made that very clear last night.” Az recoiled and Eris raised his brow. “Did you mean it? What you had said?” 

The shadows came out, as if hearing the slight challenge in his voice. Az thought for a moment and looked him in his eyes. 

“I did. When the bond first snapped for us, I didn’t want it. Being who we are, who we were, it was hard.” Eris could see the glint in his eyes, shadows wiping away the tears that threatened to spill over. “And I meant what I said when I came back. I mean it. I will always choose you. Because I do love you.” 

Eris ignored the burning in his own eyes. In a soft whisper, he replied with those first vows he took. “Til the end of our days.” 

A moment of silence and Az whispered. “We said that to her too.” Guilt welled in Eris’s chest. “If we want her to come back, we can’t just push her away.”

”I know,’ his tone was harsher than he intended. “I know that.”

“Then why do you act like it’s so hard?” 

It was Eris’s turn to recoil at the accusing tone Azriel used. 

“It just is.”

��No, it’s not.”

”Not for you,” Eris’s tone was cruel, so much that the shadows raised and arch like they would strike him. 

“Then explain it.” Az demanded back. “Do you even love her?”

“Of course I do! That’s the problem.” 

“Then why would you say that?”

“You don’t understand how difficult it is. I don’t know how to explain it.”

“Can you try?” 

They sat in silence for a long time. How could Eris put into words the problem was he loved both of them so much it hurt. He felt like he couldn’t even breathe half the time he looked at you. Azriel, he was more used to- but there were moments he’d see his mate out of the corner of his gaze and his heart still stopped in his chest. It was ridiculous and childish. And with you- with you it was so much worse. Eris could feel the heat in his cheeks.  

“When the bond snapped between us it was familiar. I knew exactly what to expect and how to handle it.” 

“So with y/n you can’t?” Az looked at him skeptically. 

“Azriel, I can’t even look at her without wanting her.” 

“That’s because she’s our mate.” Eris shook his head and Az looked dumbfounded. “It’s hard for me too, you know. It’s only been, what? Two years since accepting it?”

“Three.”

“Do you remember what it was like when it was just us?” Eris scoffed and Az frowned. “You were a new high lord on top of it. Blew out the fireplaces way more times when we first mated than when we mated-“

“You don’t have to remind me.” Eris winced, shoving down the embarrassment. “But I pushed you away. You gave me space. We controlled ourselves.”

“We had a decade and a half to do so as mates.” 

”I should have more control-“

”We have two mating bonds each, Eris. One is still fresh.” Azriel scoffed and shook his head. “All this because you’re acting like a mate should.” 

“I am a High Lord,’ Eris snapped. “I cannot afford distractions. I gave myself one year, which was what I gave us. It’s unacceptable for me to be acting like this.”

”It’s just dinner.”

”Not when I want to fuck her on the table.”

Azriel’s eyebrows shot up. He looked Eris over and his scent shifted just slightly. Eris couldn’t be bothered to be embarrassed. 

He finally asked, “should I be jealous?” Eris didn’t reply. “You never tried to fuck me on the dining table.” 

“Normally I want you under it.” Eris ignored Az’s jaw twitch. “Like I said, It’s easier to ignore it with you.”   

Az’s brows furrowed. “I don’t know if I should be offended or not.” 

“I told you that you wouldn’t understand.” 

“You’re right. I don’t. Because if I want to fuck, I just do it.” 

“Because you can. I cannot.” Eris stood in frustration, arms crossed and fingers gripped into his own biceps. “I’m High Lord of Autumn.” 

Az laughed. He laughed and leaned forward onto his knees, rubbing his eyes. Eris ignored the pang of hurt in his chest. He knew Az wouldn’t understand but to laugh? 

“Eris,” he said, catching his breath and wiping his eyes. “You’re right. You are High Lord. You can do whatever you want.” 

Eris frowned. “I have an obligation to the court-“

“You have other people to do these things, Eris.” Azriel was now on his feet, hands moving and shadows whirling as he talked. “You don’t have to be at every single meeting! You don’t have to look at every itinerary. You purged the rot out of this court. I know because I helped you do it. If you can’t trust the people you hand picked to help run this court, then we need to reevaluate the court.” 

Eris frowned. “I’ve done that. It’s not- it isn’t about running the court.” 

It was true- he’d let go of his court duties to throw himself into his work for this upcoming summit. It mattered to him greatly that this went well. Azriel’s hand dropped to his side, head tilted and brows furrowed. 

“Then what is it?” 

“You wouldn’t understand.” He repeated. “You are my mate but you are not High Lord. The Autumn Court isn’t like the Night Court.” Az recoiled a little. “I do not mean that disrespectfully.”

Az frowned but didn’t reply. Eris hoped he would leave it be. Eris glanced out the window and he finally spoke again. 

“Did you get a letter from her? While I was gone?”

“No.” A pang of guilt echoed in his chest. “Her friend replied. Said she would give her the letter but wouldn’t pressure her further. She will return when she’s ready.” 

Gods, did Eris hope his own words were true. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

You spent two more nights in Summer. You wouldn’t leave the room. Samira came to see you throughout the day so you won’t eat alone. The third day she barged in and demanded you have breakfast with her. The moment you stepped out of the room, a lone shadow crept up your body, curling under the collar of the loose shirt you were wearing. You had immense guilt for making it wait outside for three days with no access to you. Yes, you needed the space, but that didn’t make it better. 

Tarquin was waiting for you both in the small dining room. She neglected to mention he would be there. You cut your eyes to her and she shrugged with a grin. It was the first time you’d seen him since arriving. Dressed in a deep blue and white robe, he had not changed since you last saw him. He greeted you warmly and offered a chair near him and across from Samira. 

“Thank you, Tarquin.” You said softly, taking your seat. “Your hospitality is greatly appreciated.” 

“You’re always welcome in Summer. Though I wish it was under better circumstances.” He replied with a warm smile. 

You winced at that.  “I owe you a great favor.” 

“You owe me nothing. You are Samira’s dearest friend. She’s learned by now I’ll give her almost anything she wants.” He added with a chuckle. 

“Almost is the key word in that sentence,” she added. 

“I still thank you for your accommodation.” 

“And you are welcome.” Tarquin gestured to the food. “Shall we?” 

The perk of staying in summer was the food. Fresh melons were always served no matter the time. The greens were leaner than Autumn’s hearty root vegetables. Seasonings were drastically different. You took a poached egg with spinach and red sauce onto your plate along with what you were certain was a cheesy bread. Though Samira made you eat something, this was the first full meal you’d had in days. 

“Have you been to the new south wing?” Tarquin asked. 

“Not yet.” Samira answered for you, cutting her eyes at him. 

“It’s okay,” you couldn’t help but smile at your friend’s defensiveness. “This is the first time I left the room.” You admitted. 

He gave you a soft smile. “I see. If you are up to it, you should go visit it. We started a gallery for the schools. Students decorated it with their works.” 

“That sounds lovely.”

A rustling of paper beside you drew your attention. You looked just in time to see the tail end of a wisp slither under the table. The envelope beside you was the one you’d received the night you arrived. The one you’ve been ignoring. You rolled your eyes and snatched it up, ripping along the fold to open it. 

“Apologies,” you said to Tarquin and Samira, “someone is impatient and will not let me eat breakfast in peace.” 

You knew you looked ridiculous, scolding something they couldn’t see. But you knew the shadow heard you, if the cool touch around your ankle was any indication. You pulled out the paper. It smelled like Autumn. It smelled like Eris. You ignored the pang in your stomach and unfolded. 

Love. I do not fault you for leaving. I ask for you to return when you are ready. This is not something that can be resolved through letters. I know you are safe in Summer. I simply request that you let us know you are well. Azriel is beside himself; his shadows cannot get to you. Another pang of guilt hit you. As is your right. You could feel the pause before the next sentence in your mind despite there not being a gap. It’s disingenuous to apologize here. You deserve an apology in person. Until then, I will push out the timeline of the summit- 

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me,” you said aloud. You blinked and flushed looking over to Tarquin and Samira. Tarquin looked away; Samira gave you an apologetic smile. “I’m sorry.” You took a deep breath. 

“Is that?” Samira looked at the paper and then back to you. 

“Yes.” You cut your gaze to Tarquin. “Tarquin have you received any cancellations for the summit?” 

Tarquin’s eyebrows raised. “Yes,” he said slowly. He looked as if he was still processing your question. He added, “Well, I just saw a letter this morning from Eris. I can assume it was about the summit.”

“I see,” you pursed your lips for a moment. “Tarquin. I thank you for allowing me to stay. And for providing such good accommodations.” You sighed. “It appears I’m needed in Autumn. They will not be postponing this summit if I have anything to do with it.”

You stood, stuffing down your true anger to keep your head in the moment. You stood, grabbing the letter and envelope. You frowned at the feeling of the shadow curling around your left ankle. You knew it wasn’t its fault but as it was a part of Azriel, you still were annoyed at the touch. 

“I hope to see you both again under better circumstances. The summit preferably.” You knew your smile was tight and forced but couldn’t do anything about it at the moment. 

“I’ll go with you and see you off,” Samira gave you a sympathetic look. 

You nodded and gave Tarquin a nod. 

He nodded back. “Hope to see you at the summit as well.” 

You then turned and left, moving faster than intended in an effort to get to your things. And to get out the excess energy your frustration had caused you. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Tarquin watched you leave the dining room and Samira stood to join you. Her hesitation had him glancing over to her. She was staring at him skeptically. 

“You have not received any such letter,” she whispered. 

Tarquin shrugged. “She doesn’t need to know that.” 

“Who’s side are you on,” she put her hands on her waist, her dark braid flipping forward over her shoulder. 

“If you were to ever run away to Autumn, I would like to think Eris would return the favor.” Tarquin could not hide his smirk. 

You were equally if not more stubborn than Samira. He knew you would have stayed for a month without the right motivation. And from what Samira had told him- it only seemed fair. She gave him a stern look. 

He added, “she is more than welcome to return, Mira. I promise.” 

He reached over and took her hand to kiss her knuckles. That softened her stance. 

“I’ll see her off. But if she returns even more upset, I’m blaming you.” 

“Understood my sunrise.” He bit back a smile watching her leave. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Your anger dissipated the second your feet landed in Autumn soil. The crisp air filled your lungs, relaxing you immediately. You stood before the entrance to the house, sun shining through the trees and leaves casting shadows. In those shadows you saw movement. Az’s shadows swarmed up to you, swirling at your feet. Worse than the hounds, they swirled up and around your legs, presumably excited you were home. You shoved down the sadness you felt knowing they missed you. Which most likely reflected the state your mates were in. 

You stepped through the wards, magic washing over you. Shadows dispersed and another step forward the doors flew open. 

You inhaled sharply, gaze locked as Az stumbled forward. Your chest tightened and eyes watered. You willed yourself not to cry. Az stopped at the steps and Eris walked up beside him. Gods you wanted to run up those stairs right to their arms. You refrained. Instead you held your head high and blinked the tears away. They watched in silence as you walked up the steps. 

“Where are the guards?” You asked, breaking the tense silence. 

You didn’t ascend the stairs.

They both stared at you. 

“We weren’t expecting anyone,” Eris' voice was so soft you almost didn’t hear it. 

A flicker of motion at Az’s side had your gaze dropping. His hands squeezed into fists. Just as quickly his shoulders slumped and wings dropped. You glanced back to see silver lining his eyes. He whispered your name. It felt like he reached into your chest and squeezed. 

You shook your head. “Don’t.” Your resolve was failing you but you forced your voice steady. “Let me come in. Then we talk in the small common room.”

Azriel’s face crumbled with hurt but Eris understood. He gently pulled at Az, guiding him back inside. You nearly collapsed the second they were out of your site. You didn’t know how you would get through this if just seeing them made you want to double over in tears. You wiped your eyes and sniffed. You can do this. You told yourself. You took a last deep breath, grounding yourself before you took that first step up the stairs. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Az was drowning. Or, at least it felt like it. 

You were right there- at the foot of the steps, still in summer clothes, the smell of the sea carried up on the wind from where you stood. He didn’t believe it until he felt the wards move. He was in such a rush, he didn’t even winnow. He pushed at least two dignitaries out of the way to get through the halls. Now Eris was leading him away, deliberately warm hands the only thing grounding him. Az didn’t realize they were in the common room until Eris clicked the door shut. 

“She was right there,” he whispered, vision blurring again. He blinked profusely and crossed his arms. He looked to Eris who was watching the door. “How do we even know she’s coming?”

She walks towards us. A shadow reassured him. 

His heart was pounding in his ears while his gaze focused on the door. A moment later it opened and his heart leapt into his throat. You slipped inside, rogue shadows swirling around you while you clicked the door shut. You were so close; he could see the darkness under your eyes and guilt twisted in his gut. You looked between him and Eris. 

“Sit, please,” you said. 

Azriel didn’t want to sit. Shadows shoved him and forced him to move. It was ironic that the three of you sat in this room five years ago. You were a stranger then. Az didn’t even have to beg Eris to meet with you. Deep down he knew you were the one he was looking for, what he thought Eris was looking for too. He tried to not let the truth taint the memory. You remained standing, arms crossed tight against your chest. He could hear your heart beating with how silent the room was. You finally dropped your arms, and stood straight. 

“You canceled the summit?” You asked and glared directly at Eris. 

“No,” he replied curtly. 

“You said in your letter you would. And then Tarquin told me you had sent correspondence.” You pursed your lips like you always did when angered and added, “Recant the letters. Like hells I’m going to let you cancel this after the mess it’s caused.”

Azriel glanced at Eris who looked as confused as he did. Azriel could hear the lift of Eris’s brow as he responded. 

“I did not send any letters to Tarquin. All of my letters were diverted to your friend.” 

Now confusion etched itself in your face. “But he-“ you looked off thinking and then scowled. “He fucking lied to me, that asshole.” 

Az snorted. He couldn’t help it. Tarquin lying was unheard of. And to lie in Azriel and Eris’s favor? The notion was ridiculous despite that being the logical answer. You cut your eyes at him and Az stilled, waiting. 

“It doesn’t matter,” you shook your head. “I only came back because I thought you canceled the summit.” 

“What?” Az felt like a knife twisted in him.

“I,” you crossed your arms and clenched your jaw. Defensive. “I should go.” 

“No.” Az was out of his chair and went to grab you. A warm hand grabbed his arm. Too many emotions were swelling in his chest. “Please. You just came back.” 

“And I shouldn’t have.” You whispered. 

There was pain there. It made the bond to you ache. He tried to claw at it, to force you to open your side. It didn’t work. 

“How can you say that?” His own voice cracked but he didn’t care. He tried to pull his arm out of Eris’s grasp but his mate held fast. He turned to him with a glare. “Let me go, Eris.”

Eris ignored him. “You don’t have to stay,” he said softly. “Not if you don’t wish to.” 

Siphons flared again as Az wildly turned to Eris, teeth bared “No.” 

“I will not hold another female in this court against her will.” Eris hissed back. “My mother was held captive here for half a millenia. I won’t allow it to happen again.” 

Az knew he was right but the bond in his chest squirmed. He looked back at you. You took a step back, probably out of fear. Shame replaced the emotions warring in him. 

“Please.” 

In the span of a moment, your stance shifted. Magic started to hum around you. Azriel flinched. You were angry. Very angry. 

“Why!” You tightened your arms against your chest. “Why should I stay? You don’t need me. I don’t even know why you’re pretending like you even want me here.” Az felt frozen in place, like he couldn’t breathe. Angry tears fell down your cheeks. “Why spend time with someone you don’t want or need?” 

Az fell to his knees, Eris’s hands still tight on his arm. His shadows had disappeared- to where he didn’t care. 

“Baby, please.” He would beg. He would grovel. He didn’t care. You couldn’t leave. Not again. He muttered your name and tears fell down his own cheeks. “Please. We need to talk about this.”

“There’s nothing to talk about,” you wiped your eyes. 

“This is my fault.” Eris let go of Az’s arm, stepping in front of him. “I shut you out. I thought it was the right thing to do. I’m clearly wrong.” 

“What did I do?” You sniffled and wiped frantically at your face more. “What did I do wrong?” 

“You didn’t do anything wrong, love.” Eris stepped closer and Az held his breath waiting. 

“Clearly I did! I’ve been going to bed alone for months!” The sob you let out cut Az’s heart nearly in half. “I barely see you. I barely talk to you. Neither of you so much as touch me. I thought you both needed space but when you promised, you promised, to meet for dinner neither of you showed.”

“And I’m sorry.” Az whispered. He had no excuse. Not really. A fact he had to face now that you were here and hurting. “I thought-“ 

“You thought what?” Your anger resurfaced. “That I would be fine? Or did you even remember I existed?” 

He winced, dropping his gaze to the floor. What could he even say to that? 

“It’s my fault.” Eris repeated. “Be angry at me.” 

“I am!”

Az finally forced himself up. You stepped back again at the movement. He forced himself to focus, to shoved down all noise in his head.

“I don’t know what else to say to make you believe that I’m sorry. That we’re sorry.” His voice was shockingly steady. “I can’t force you to stay if you truly don’t want to.”

He expected you to leave. To be even more aggressive. He could weather it. 

He didn’t expect you to fall apart. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

You couldn’t take it anymore. 

Eris and Azriel both stared at you, silently pleading with their fucking eyes. You tried to be strong. To hold your ground. Even when Az was clawing at your bond. Even with Eris begging you to place the blame on him.  

But it hurt too much. You caved in on yourself, sobbing in the middle of the fucking receiving room. 

“You only want me here because of the bond,” you choked out. “You don’t. You don’t need me. You don’t.”

Az grabbed you. 

You cried harder at the sudden feeling of his arms wrapped around you. He let you sob into his tunic, his scent already calming you even if you didn’t want it to. You felt the shift- he winnowed you somewhere. His hands moved lower and lifted you up. When was the last time he’d held you? You didn’t fight it. Shadows blocked your vision as he carried you a few steps before turning with you to sit down. He held you in silence, while your tears tapered off. Occasionally his hand would rub your back. Gods did you miss him, this. But this wasn’t what you planned. You wiped your eyes and forced yourself up. Hazel eyes you hadn’t looked into in days met yours. 

“Hey.”

“Hi,” Gods, would you ever stop crying? Your face felt swollen. You probably looked like a mess. “Where…”

You looked around. You were in your rooms. He had sat you both on the bed. Something inside you relaxed. Then your gaze found amber, bright and steady at the end of the bed. You suddenly felt shame- for losing your cool, for crying on Azriel. You moved off of him quickly. 

Eris got to his feet. “Don’t. Love, please. It’s alright.” 

You stopped and swallowed hard. You glanced between them both. Eris blocked the way out. Az moved to sit up properly on the bed. You were cornered and your eyes watered again. Eris relaxed his stance but held out his hand. 

“I can run you a bath.” Your bond to him ached. You missed his soft tone. “Or we can go to the sitting room and talk.” 

Talk. 

What was there to talk about? But his eyes pleaded with you silently. You nodded but didn’t take his hand. A slight you couldn’t remedy in time as he lowered it, fingers balling into a fist. You followed him out, Az behind you. The scent of them, of your rooms eased the tension in you. Now all that was left was sadness. You went straight to your arm chair, arms crossed tight against your chest again and legs tucked up against you. Az and Eris remained standing. The silence was heavy like the closed bonds in your chest. Eris and Az were looking at each other. Like they always did. Talking with their eyes in a way you couldn’t and hadn’t mastered. You couldn’t even bother to be angry about it. 

“I’ll go get some tea. It’ll help with,” Eris trailed off, looking at you with his sad eyes. “I’ll be back.”

“No.” Eris stopped before he started, looking back at you puzzled. You scoffed. “Make Az do it.” You cut your gaze to your other mate. “Go make tea. Since you follow orders so well.” 

“Y/N-“

“No. You were going to make tea while Az stayed here and calmed me down. Am I wrong?” Neither of them spoke. “Then you won’t have a problem with Az going.” 

“Okay,” Az said, defeat in his voice. 

Eris clenched his jaw and after a moment Az left, shadows trailing behind him. Now you were alone with Eris for the first time in months. The silence between you was even heavier. He finally sighed,  and looked at you directly. 

“Y/N, I am-“

“Sorry?” You supplemented quickly. He frowned but did not move. For some reason that made you angrier. “You say you’re sorry as if it matters.” 

“It does matter.” He said harshly. “What do you want me to do, Y/N? What can I do to prove to you I am sorry?“

“Tell me what I did wrong.”

You wanted to be angry. You wanted to spit out those words with venom. But all that came out was more tears and a meek tone. 

“Love, you did nothing wrong.”

“Then why don’t you love me like you love Azriel?” You sniffled. 

“Y/N.” He fell back into a chair as if you’d actually struck him. 

“I’ve tried so hard to be someone you wanted. And nothing I do is good enough.” Your eyes were hurting from how much you were rubbing them. “I’ve spent three days trying to figure out where I went wrong, what changed.”

“Nothing changed. That is the problem!” You blinked, shocked that Eris had yelled at you. He leaned onto his knees with his face in his hands. “Neither of you understand how hard this is.” 

You curled up in the chair and watched him silently. More still from shock than fear. He finally wiped his face with his hand, pushing it into his hair as he sat back up. His eyes were tinged red, like he wanted to cry. 

You’d never seen Eris cry before.

His gaze met yours and he scowled, jaw clenched. You still didn’t speak. He finally relaxed his shoulders and spoke. 

“It’s not,” he paused again. Looking up and away, like he was trying to keep himself together. “Five centuries of hiding affection doesn’t go away in a decade. Azriel is different because he,” Eris took a deep breath. “I can push him away. I can let the hardened mask stay on even after the room has cleared. I can push away this,” he held his hand over his chest like he was touching his own soul, maybe the bond. “Want. I can hide it. I can tame it. I could the moment the bond snapped. But, the cauldron has damned me because with you I can’t.” His voice cracked. “And that is terrifying.” 

What could you say to that? He sighed again, wiped his hand over his face again.

He added, “I’ve always gotten caught up in my work. It’s safer that way. It was always safer that way.”

The Mother was looking out for you, or maybe Azriel had been waiting for the right moment. Either way, he entered with a tray of tea and cups. He looked wearily between you and Eris while he sat the tray down. He made you a cup, putting exactly what you liked in it, and handed it to you. You hesitated- but not on purpose. You muttered your thanks and took it from him. The silence was heavy between the three of you as Az took his seat. He nor Eris reached for the tea. Az leaned onto his knees and sighed heavily. 

“So can we talk about it?” He asked, looking at you directly. 

You sipped your tea letting the warmth of it wash through you. Azriel looked so tired. They both did. Guilt started to churn in your stomach. Mostly because of Eris’s confession but partly because this whole situation was your fault. You held your cup tight like it was the only lifeline you had. 

“I’m sorry,” you whispered. You stared down at your tea, unable to look at either of them anymore. “I shouldn’t have left. I just thought you wouldn’t miss me.” 

Cool shadows came in from your peripheral, wrapping up your arms. They did that when they thought you were upset. You were too tired at this point to be upset anymore. 

“Why-“ Az stopped himself, clenching his jaw when you glanced at him. “Y/N, you’re our mate.”

“These past few months haven’t felt like it.” 

They wanted to talk. You spoke the truth. Your words struck them both hard. You put the cup and saucer on the table beside you. Least you lose your grip on it. With nothing to hold you crossed your arms against your chest. The shadows moved but didn’t leave you. You continued. 

“I didn’t think I was a female who needed time or touch. Not until you both stopped giving it to me.” Guilt still swarmed in you. “I should have told you sooner.”

“You tried to tell us, we did a poor job of listening.”

Az tried to crack a joke. The corner of your lips twitched a little. A glance at Eris told you he wasn’t as amused. Az sighed heavily, drawing your attention back to him. 

“Do you really think we don't need you?” Az looked so hurt, you felt sick from it. You did that. 

“I-“ Gods the tears were back. You blinked profusely. “You’ve been together for so long. Just because I’m your mate doesn’t mean I fit into your lives. It’s… obvious I’m still a disruption.” 

Shadows recoiled from you, the solid dark wisps whipping around like they would hiss if they could. Azriel whistled to try and reign them in. They went semi- transparent and lowered themselves back down onto you. Gods you wanted them off. In a burst of over stimulation, your magic flared and pushed the shadows away from you. Az stiffened where he sat, watching the shadows slink back to him. 

“I’m sorry. I-“ By the cauldron could you do anything right? 

“It’s okay.” Az whispered.

The air was thick again- silence heavier than before. None of you were getting anywhere with this. Your mind became a quick tangle of worries- rapid thoughts one after the other, making you tense where you sat. You should leave. You weren’t needed. You should tell Samira to just make you a permanent resident of Summer. Ignoring a bond would be easier than breaking one. 

“Y/N.”

You inhaled sharply, when warm hands touched you. You had stood up during your frantic thoughts. You were breathing heavily. Eris was in front of you- not unlike how he’d been when the bond snapped. His hand reached up and cupped your face. His thumb wiped away more tears. 

“Let us in.”

You felt two gentle tugs in your chest. A lot different than the pulling and clawing from earlier. Reopening the bonds you kept shut for so long felt terrifying. Movement to your left caught your eye. Az was now beside Eris. 

“Please?” Az’s eyes begged just like his tone. 

You didn’t realize Eris was exaggerating his breath, breathing with you to calm you down. Slowly, breathing in and out gently, open your bonds. You would have collapsed if Eris hadn’t held onto you. Letting yourself feel them both, even slowly was too much. Your cold heart was suddenly flooded with warmth you hadn’t felt in months. Love. Love you’d forgotten was even there. 

“I’m sorry,” you sobbed. You wrapped your arms around Eris’s neck and dug your fingers into his shirt. “I’m sorry.”

He didn’t speak, he didn’t have to. He carried you to bed, Az following behind him. The rest of the day was a blur of more tears and soft confessions, being held between your mates. You learned more about them in those hours than you had the last five years of being with them. You each had your weakness- you bottled up your grievances and let your thoughts rot in them. Eris did the opposite. He bottled up his love, hiding from you and Az when he didn’t have too. Burying himself in work to not seem weak. Az admitted his complacency, with how he would let things go unchecked. Just rolling slights and not addressing them fully. 

You all agreed after a long warm bath that closing the bonds wasn’t working. It helped keep you all focused, but what good was that when you couldn’t feel your mates and them you? Even leaving them open a little wasn’t enough. You'd have to learn to function with it open. Eris only asked to wait until after the summit. He brought it up as he sat behind you, braiding and drying your hair. You’d changed into a soft nightgown and kept a cold towel pressed to your eyes. 

“I do not need Az sending how he feels about me arguing with other high lords down the bond in the middle of a meeting.” 

“It was one time,” Az was somewhere to your left, clearly offended. “I can’t help it, you're hot when you use your high lord voice.” 

You snorted. Azriel wasn’t wrong. Eris muttered something behind you that you didn’t fully hear. Fingers pulled at the towel and you winced as the room came into view, lights and all. Azriel dipped the bed where he sat, shadows taking the cloth away. 

You asked, “Do I look better?” 

“You never looked bad,” Az smirked. His eyes ran over your face. “Your head shouldn’t hurt in the morning. If it does, we'll get Edith’s magic tonic.”

“Edith is going to revoke access to that tonic if you keep taking it for every little thing.” Eris tied the end of the first braid. 

“Then it’s a good thing it’s for Y/N,” Az said with a sass in his tone. 

You missed them. How could you ever think- you shut it down. No more tears for the night. For now, you let Eris start his second braid in your hair while Az spread out on the bed with his head in your lap. Exactly where you all were supposed to be. 

[blimpintime]

a jar of wind part one

Wynnie Lara is a fairy that was saved from a jar from Amarantha's reign of terror, but is soon figuring out that her time of peace is coming to a end.

warnings: angst, azriel sucks :p and unedited

word count: 1.4k

eventual Eris x OC

“Rhys! You will never believe what I managed to do with my-” I bursted into the kitchen with a warm glow, my green dress flowing around me and headed towards where he was sitting with a cup of tea.

“Wynn, I have been up with Nyx for the past three nights and days with him teething. I would love some silence. Please.” He said with a low voice and eyes closed in annoyance. 

“Oh! Right, yes. Sorry.” I wince, I twirl my finger and use the wind to brush through the mellow sounding wind chimes I have placed around the River House. 

The tension seemed to leave his body, and I placed a sisterly kiss on the top of his head, my ginger bobbed hair layering over his black hair. In doing so I managed to remove the growing headache from him and take it on for myself.

“I didn’t ask you to do that, Wynn.” He said softly.

“I know, but that’s what family is for Rhys.” I respond with a light touch on his shoulder and whisper words of encouragement as I leave. 

As I walked out of the River House where the sun is setting, I ran into Azriel and Cassian. I smile and my subtle pink glow brightens.

“Hello you two!” I say with a wave and notice the grimm look on their body language and my face falls and my glow dims. “What happened, who's hurt?” 

Cassian winces and Azriel gives me a sharp look, “Stay out of it Wynn. You do enough damage as is.” 

I flinch back and the wind around me goes cold, “What is that supposed to mean?” 

He walks closer to me and leans over to get in my face, “It means that whatever magical experiment you tried this time back fired and hurt Elain.”

“What are you talking about?” I whisper back. My mind reels trying to remember if I left a magic trial unattended in the open, but I draw a blank. Unless… 

“She snuck into my cottage?” I question brows furrowing. There was only one trial I left at my house and that was my attempt of getting my wind to play instruments on its own, but wind is finicky and if interrupted incorrectly can cause a spiral of sharp and messy wind.

“Snuck? Wynn, you let everyone into your home all the time, there was no reason to lock your doors.” Cassian responded. I go hot with anger. 

“So just because I host all the time means my house is fair game? There are wards around it for a reason when I am not home. If that is your logic here then allow me to go into your guys home whenever I feel and do what I please.” I snap back.

“You’re being unreasonable Wynn.” Azriel says while rolling his eyes. “It was just Elain. She is harmless.” 

“I do not care who it was Azriel, it is my home. What did she need from me anyway? I just saw her this morning.” I ask him and he storms by me to go inside the house. Cassian and I follow him.

“Rhysand!” Azriel yells. Rhys walks out of the kitchen looking a little better than he did before. 

“Why are we yelling?” He asks.

“Wynn has caused more damage to this court.” Azriel says and I wince back. Rhys turns to look at me with an eyebrow raised. 

I raise my hands in defense.

“Wynn, was it another silly experiment?” Rhys asks. My heart tugs and I nod, and I feel as though I should defend myself. They’re not silly, they are fun.

“Did I do something to personally offend you Azriel?” I ask softly. 

“Yes! Since you’ve shown up to this court all you have done have been attached to the hip with Feyre, surprised she hasn’t told you that you are suffocating. You’re nothing more than an annoying weed.” He spat, “You buzz in and out loudly all the time, you cannot read a room to save your life, your experiments are juvenile and lack actual use, and whenever you shrink down to your pixie form is the only time you're tolerable because we can barely hear you.” He said like a weight has been lifted off his chest. 

I can only stare at him, shock and hurt cover my face. The glow of pink on my body fades down to a low humming blue, and suddenly I am back in that damn jar. 

The jar I am in is hot and stuffy. I do not remember how I got here but I do understand that this is cursed glass and I won’t be able to be let out unless the lid is opened by the one who placed the curse or is killed. 

The jar sits in the middle of a long dinner table as decor, with being alive I always have a glow to me. When I am neutral and healthy it's normally pinkish orange, right now it’s bluish purple relating to my mood and terror. It hasn’t changed in the past decade of being here.

Being small and trapped in a jar and treated as entertainment by those who are desperate to feel power again is something I would never wish upon anybody. They like to cover the oxygen holes on the top and force me to dance or create wind art. Which is borderline impossible with the lack of airflow in here anyway.

“Tell me pretty, what other colors can you turn?”

“Az-” Cassian whispered.

“Fuck you Azriel. You know why I don’t go into that size very often and you of all people should understand why.” I spit at him, and he for just a moment looks guilty. 

“What? You all say this behind her back anyway. Now that I tell her to her face it’s a problem?” He looks at his two brothers. And they both won’t look me in the eye.

“Is that true?” I choke out with silent tears running down my face. Rhys looks at me and takes a breath, “There could have been more tact to how we said this but to put it bluntly yes.”

My wispy iridescent wings pop out of my back. And I start walking backwards towards the door, “I will see myself out then.” 

“Wynn, wait please let's discuss this more maturely.” Rhys says. Azriel scoffs in the background. 

“If it wasn’t for her, Elain wouldn’t be hurt again.” I flinch again feeling sick to my stomach. 

“I am sorry.” I choke out. Cassian reaches for me and I step back curling into myself feeling betrayed by those I called family. 

“No, that was completely uncalled for.” A new voice responds. I turn around to say Nesta and Elain. I look over Elain and all I notice is a few wind burns on her arms. She gives me a soft smile and I look down with a frown.

“Azriel, what is the actual problem here? Because I am fine. I went into her cottage because I forgot my tea recipe book there and completely forgot she was running an experiment.” Elain comes up to me softly and puts her hand on my shoulder. I lean into her warmth. Nesta stares at him with a cold hard glare. 

“He’s jealous.” She observes. Azriel looks shocked for just a moment before he stalks closer into Nesta’s face. To which signals me and Elain to step back and Cassian to intervene. 

“Enough.” Rhys says rubbing his temples again. “Azriel you were out of line with the way you approached this situation and Wynn maybe just be a little less, you.” 

All three girls flinch with the wording. 

“Have you lost your fucking mind Rhysand?” Nesta barks. “Wait until I tell Feyre.” 

By the time the two of them are arguing I shrink down to my pixie size and fly home to my cottage. I arrive at the front stoop back to normal size, and burst into tears against my front door barely making it inside before I collapse into a pile on the floor. 

In a panic I start shoving some of my emergency belongings in a satchel; clothes, my hygiene products, and my magic trials notebook. 

Frantically rushing around my small cottage I see a teacup Elain painted for me, with little orange and pink flowers all over it. I wrap it in one of my shirts and stuff it into my satchel.

By now the sun has completely set, and I take off my porch, my holographic wings sparkling in the moonlight and head towards some place I know will bring me some comfort. 

The Autumn Court. 

a/n: please enjoy! I have been thinking about this idea for a while! Leave comments, like, and share. if you have any questions plz let me know!

I do not own any of the characters that Sarah J Mass has created. but I do own miss Wynnie Lara :p

[writeroutoftime]

precious secret

pairing: eris vanserra x fem!reader

summary: eris has kept you - his mate - a secret for years, not wanting any harm to come to you. but when his hands are tied, he must turn to an unlikely ally to offer you protection

warnings: minor mentions of violence against reader (split lip, not graphic description), beron - enough said

words: 1.5k

a/n: alright, I am in love with eris - at least the fanon version of him lol. and I'm such a sucker for stories where he tries to protect his mate from his father, so I humbly offer this as my submission. please enjoy and it'd be great if you let me know what you think! have a great day everyone!

oOoOo

A sense of fear palpated through Eris' heart with every purposeful stride his took down the halls of Forest House. His palms were sweaty, and his skin felt flushed, a stark contrast to the cool and collected exterior he normally presented.

The moment his trusted guard had let him know of your situation, his mind could think only of the worst possible scenarios. The worst images his mind could mangle before his eyes flooded his senses, and he knew the only remedy would be to see, hear, and touch you.

Upon reaching your room, he slammed open the door and immediately rushed to your side. His hands automatically reached to cup your cheeks, eyes frantically scanning for blood, bruises, anything that could cause you pain. It didn't take long for his eyes to zero in on the blood that ran along your lips.

Hands shaking, Eris reached out to gently wipe the blood away with his thumb. Your instinctive flinch caused a pain to wash over his body. He never wanted to be the cause of your pain. You sent a wave of reassurance down the golden bond, but it did little to assure him.

"It's worse than it looks." you tried, grasping his wrist, holding his palm against your cheek.

Eris growled, eyes hardening as though his mind had not registered your words. "What happened?

There was a moment of hesitation from your side, but with a soft sigh you let your mate in the morning's events. "Word got out to Beron that there had been sightings of us together. He let me off with a warning for lesser fae such as myself to stay away from the likes of you."

"This can't go on." he spoke, scoffing at his father's words.

Now it was your turn to panic. "W-what do you mean?" 

"It's not safe for you to stay here any longer." he clarified, gaze softening ever so slightly.

"I'm not leaving you." you demanded, holding your ground.

"Love, we thought we were being careful and look what happened. What am I to do if this becomes a regular occurrence. It will ease my mind to know you are safe and out of harm's way." 

"Away from you." you argued, nuzzling your head into his neck as you tried to stop the tears that burned against your eyes. 

"Just for a little while." he promised. "Just until I know it's safe to bring you back." softly pressing a kiss to the crown of your head. 

"I don't know where I shall go." you admitted. 

It pained you to think of leaving the Autumn Court - your home. Yes, Beron was a horrible, cruel ruler, but there was still so much good to be found outside of his clutches. The breathtaking scenery, your family, and, of course, all the beautiful moments you and your mate created together. If you left would you ever see any of it again?

"I'll take care of it." Eris said, drifting off into silence as he savored the last night he had to hold you for the time being.

oOoOo

Eris strolled through the halls of River House, trademark smirk upon his features as he came into view of his reluctant allies. Rhysand and Feyre draped themselves across two chairs at their grand table, looking warily at the heir to the Autumn Court. 

"High Lord, High Lady, a pleasure as always." Eris greeted, bowing slightly to the rulers of the Night Court. Though, it didn't escape his notice the close eye that the rest of the Inner Circle kept on him.

"Eris," Rhysand acknowledged, trying to be diplomatic. "to what do we owe this unexpected visit?" 

There was a long pause in which Eris took a deep breath and pushed aside the snarky comments, the masked facade, and allowed the Night Court to see him in his true form. "I am here to ask you to provide sanctuary for a member of the Autumn Court." he spoke, choosing his words carefully. 

Feyre cocked her head to the side, as if trying to decipher a hidden cipher in Eris' words. "And why do you presume we have any obligation to help someone associated with you?"

Eris' palms burned with a heat that threatened to burst free and wreak havoc. A reaction that had become more common after solidifying the mating bond with you all those years ago. But he tamped down said flames, knowing anger wouldn't get him anywhere. So, the red-headed swallowed his pride and tried another approach.

"I know I have no room to ask such a request, but please." Eris pled, bending to bow before the Night Court on one knee. "If not for my sake, then do it for the sake of - of my mate. For the innocent female who has had the misfortune of falling in love with me." he confessed, revealing his most precious card.

All eyes of the Inner Circle widened in surprise, and Feyre couldn't contain her gasp at Eris' words. None of them had ever had any inkling there was someone tied to Eris in that way, but from the shake in his voice, to the bowing of his head, they knew he spoke only the truth. 

"I still need time to take control of Autumn from my father, and it is no longer safe for her there." he continued. "But once I am High Lord, she will be able to return to me. Until then, this is the safest place I know of for her. Name your price, and I swear it will be done." 

Rhys and Feyre shared a look, silently conversing. Even the powerful High Lord was taken aback by the confession and felt a small pang in his own heart. His mind shifted to Feyre and the lengths he had gone to protect and everything he would continue to do if necessary -what he would do, what he would promise, what he would give up. All just to know she was safe, regardless of his own well-being. He saw those same feelings reflected in Eris' eyes. No longer was he an arrogant heir before them, but a male in love and desperate. 

"That is a bold offer to make." Rhys spoke, his voice commanding always one with a flair for dramatics. He saw the way Eris flinched in worry, so he quickly put the male out of his misery. "But we accept."

The relief Eris felt washed over him instantaneously, his shoulders sagging in relief. "Thank you." he whispered, so overcome with emotion, he didn't know how else to emote his gratitude. "I am at your disposal to the best of my ability when you call in your favor" he spoke, standing up. 

The thought of Rhysand now having a favor to dangle over his head sent a small chill down his spine. But he would offer a thousand favors to the male if it would guarantee your safety. It should have scared him, but Eris knew that wasn't anything in this world (or the next) he wouldn't do to keep you protected. 

"No favor necessary." Feyre spoke gently, after sparing a quick glance in Rhys' direction. "We know the sanctity of the mating bond, and we will do our best to keep your mate safe." she vowed, seeing a new light to the male before her.

With another round of thanks, Eris bowed his head a final time before winnowing away and back to spend one last night with you.

oOoOo

The next day, under the cover of night, Eris stood with you in his arms, at the entrance to Velaris. Tears pulled in both of your eyes as your foreheads rest against each other's. Feelings of both love and despair were shot down the bond, leaving you feeling breathless.

"Please, we can figure this out." you tried one last time, not caring if the tears on your cheeks belonged to you and Eris. We don't have to separate."

"Trust me," Eris whispered, knowing that Rhys and Feyre stood only a few feet away. "I would wish for nothing more than to be selfish and keep you by your side. But this is the only way I can ensure you’re safe."

"What about you?"

Eris pulled back slightly to take in your form, sighing softly at your stubbornness. He gently cupped your cheek, pressing soft kisses to your skin. "Don't worry about me. I'll be fine, and we'll be back together before you know it, alright?" he asked, content with your reluctant nod.

One last time, Eris leaned in and captured your lips with his. You gripped the lapels of his jacket, pulling your mate as close to your chest as was possible. The kiss was soft, but desperate and full of languish. Though you both wished the moment could last forever, you eventually pulled away, whispering words of love to each other.

"Until we see each other again, love." Eris vowed, watching your figure retreat into the safety of Velaris until you he could see you no more.

part two

[darlin-collins]

audio rp channels,and how confident am i in listening to em out loud

this is based on how romantic and tingly their audios are

redacted: nope, he breathes too much in em,plus too Many kissing, minus points for my mom thinking i was listening to p0rn while i was listening to guy

Castel audios: yes! nice choice! I'd do it

goodboy audios: also yes 10/10

siren's son: yeah I'd do it

eris serenity: yup!

escaped audios:

my little cousin: what are you listening to?

me: it's a story! here *puts one ear pod near his ear*

*cars crashing, guns shooting, total distraction, police yelling, the main character is nowhere to be heard*

my little cousin: ...why are you listening to this?

me: 😃 *how the fuck should i explain that?*

anyway 100/10 would recommend!

scythe audios : yes despite how wired it is to listen to sounds for torture and agony out loud

reverie audios: also not completely done with him but nuhuh! he also breathes too much

nomad tales and audios: yup! they don't kiss too much!

Aelswyth audio: yup!

angels&bread asmr : yeah!

glitch audios: not done with her but yes

love boldly voice acting asmr : yeah!

captain matt: yeah!

edits: (remind me if i forget any channels)

yurriVoice : depends but mostly no, he usually uses a seductive tone

ZSakuzva: it's been awhile since I've taken a round through his channel but yes

Desmond asmr: yeah but the phone's face down bc thumnail

[danikamariewrites]

Okay okay! If it hasn’t been requested already… I have to have dating mob!Eris!

Note: WE HAVE OUR FIRST BINGO!!!! Mob!Eris lives in my mind rent free aaallllll the time. My fav mob!eris series is by @thehighladywrites I reread it constantly and you should too.

Reminder that this weekend is the last for headcanon bingo! If you want to play feel free to send in a request🫶🏻

Warnings:

Mob!Eris is old money, like the New England old money aesthetic (am I biased towards this aesthetic bc I’m from the northeast? Yes, yes I am)

He’s def very possessive of his partner

Very ‘touch her and you die’ vibes

Eris is very put together. He rarely lets anyone see beneath the mask he wears

He’s such a strong person and it took you a long time to show him that it was ok to take off the mask and just be a person

It took you almost leaving for Eris to understand

The day you told him you should break up it was over the phone—it was your only option because he was so focused and when he’s focused nothing can stop him—Eris almost dropped to his knees

He won you back by showing up at your doorstep with your favorite snacks, drinks, and the promise to change

The knock on your door was desperate and fast. You knew it was Eris without even looking out the window. Rolling your eyes, ready to tell him to leave, you open the door to see the man you know to be so composed looked like he’d been up for a week straight. Eris looked paler and his hair was a mess. In his hand was a large bouquet of your favorite flowers and a grocery bag. “Eris,” you sigh. “Please, let me say what I need to and if your mind is made up…I will leave.” That last part seemed like it physically pained him. You gesture for him to continue. “Y/n, I love you more than I thought I was able to love a person. I was afraid to let you in because…because I didn’t want to lose you. Everything in my life comes at a cost and I can’t pay with you. But, shutting you out like I have been, that’s not right my love. And I’m so sorry. Please, I will do anything for a second chance.” You throw your arms around him, whispering an “oh Eris”. You drag him inside where you stay cuddled up all night talking and just being with each other.

And change he did

Eris let you in his life more

When you tell him “I love you” it still gets him. No matter how many times you tell him Eris will never get used to it

He will tell you he loves you until he’s blue in the face

When Eris loves it’s with his whole heart. There’s no half adding a relationship for him (a realization that came with almost letting you get away)

You’re a strong person and you aren’t afraid of any aspect of his life. You can’t be with his line of work

Eris trains you to fight, to handle any kind of weapon, and makes sure when you shoot you never miss

You become truly lethal and Eris couldn’t be more proud

Eris lllooovvveeessss to spoil you

You’re part of his family, his whole world revolves around you, what kind of man would Eris be if he looked perfect and you didn’t

All the best jewelry, high end clothes and shoes, handbags everything is yours

But you still favor your comfy clothes when you’re just at home

Speaking of home….Eris’s house is HUGE!!! It’s not even a house it’s a mansion

When you started dating you hung out at your place for the first few months (Eris needed to know if he could trust you before telling you everything)

Once he brought you over your jaw dropped and stayed on the floor through the whole tour

When Eris asked you to move in and you said yes you had never seen him smile so big

Eris ended up taking a few days off when you moved in and he was soooo clingy, telling you how happy he is that you’re here

Eris does like to keep his work life and home life separate as much as he can

But who is he to deny you when you just want to learn about his job

And you give good advice, so he’ll always listen to you

You don’t like being around him when he’s super busy. When Eris is focused you don’t like to disturb him (sometimes you can’t help it)

You like to sit in one of the arm chairs on the other side of Eris’s desk. You’re on your laptop typing away or shopping with his credit card or catching up on your shows

Eris likes to interrupt you when you do this. If you’re in his office he should be able to

“Come here my love.” His deep voice breaks you away from your screen. Smirking at him you round the corner of his desk to stand between his legs. Eris grabs your hips, placing you in his desk. He stands, holding your chin between his thumb and forefinger. Leaning in Eris presses a long kiss to your lips. “Have I ever told you how much I love you?” He murmurs. “Hmm, not today.” You smile against his lips as he kisses you again, leaning you to lay flat. “I love you more than you can imagine.”

Your wedding is the event of the spring

Def a destination wedding with a huge guest list

And of course your engagement ring is the brightest diamond Eris could find

He wanted it to be able to blind people in the dark

You had only seen Eris tear up a handful of times. When he saw you walk down the aisle Eris couldn’t help but beam at you as tears roll down his cheeks

Once you’re married he won’t stop calling you Mrs. Vanserra or ‘my wife’ or ‘my little wife’ and you blush every time

[surielstea]

Nobody’s Soldier

Eris Week 2024, day 5: War

Pairing: Eris Vanserra x Lieutenant!Reader

Summary: In which Reader and Eris spend their night before the war together going over battle plans, and distracting themselves from the bloodshed with other tactics.

Warnings: Slight Angst | Smut | Minors DNI | 18+ | Oral (f reviving) | p in v | penetration sex | slight worship kink | Sir kink | teasing | Eris FUCKS.

A. Note: Sorry this is so short!! I wanted it to be longer but, It’s mostly smut anyway ;)

3.1k words.

I drew in a sharp breath as I stared down at the map of Prythian, pawns of eight different colors sprawled across it.

The seven courts all gathered on one side, and Hybern in stark black marching from the west.

I groaned, my head pounding as Eris and I went over strategies for the umpteenth time that night.

Eris wrapped his arms around my shoulders, hugging me from behind and pulling me into his chest. I melt into his touch, craning my neck back to look up at him. "Where will I and my squadron be sectioned?" I ask in a tired murmur.

Eris's brows bunch and he looks down at me. "You're not fighting in this war." He shakes his head. I pull away from him, turning around to face him with confusion etched along my face.

"What do you mean I'm not fighting in this war?" My lip curls slightly.

"I'm your general, and I'm commanding you to stay off the field, what's not to understand?" He arches a manicured brow and I scowl.

"Eris I'm a Lieutenant, one of your best fighters," I state. "You cannot take me out of this war simply because you wish to keep me safe." I scoff, crossing my arms over my chest.

"Yes, I can." He states, his voice leaving no room for argument. "And I will, selfish or not you are my mate and I will not allow you to put yourself in danger." He frowned, the expression making my gut twist.

I stare at him in disbelief. "I'm a soldier, it's my job to protect this court. You cannot seriously think to keep me from fighting in our wars." I protest, stepping forward, craning my neck up at him, and snarling.

"I'm not sending you out there just to risk losing you to some war that wasn't even ours to begin with." He matched my tone.

"But it is ours. It always has been. If Hybern wins this war do you think he'll have mercy on us? That he'll even remember us?" I narrow my eyes on him and he grits his teeth, his expression unwavering. He did not speak, but he did not falter either.

"Gods, Eris if I knew accepting the mating bond meant that you'd keep me from the battlefield then I never would have—" I begin to say, but I didn’t get the chance to finish because suddenly my wrists were pinned back against the wall and Eris was flush against me, baring his teeth.

"I'd advise you don't finish that sentence if you know what's best for you." He warned a low growl rumbling from his chest that sent shivers down my spine.

"I could save lives that would be lost if I wasn't there. Lives, Eris, your men." I persisted, my voice softer but not weak.

"And jeopardize yours in the process? Call me a selfish and blinded bastard if you want, but if you were to get hurt? It would destroy me." He confessed, his voice dropping into a more intimate, sacred place, one that he only let me hear.

"Then you cannot fight either," I mutter sourly, despite my heart aching to agree, to tell him I’d do whatever he wanted if it meant we could stop arguing.

He barks a laugh at that, the sound clipped and lacking the warm amusement his laughter often had. "I am the general, I am an heir, I must fight and it is not my choice." He explained, and even if I already knew, it hurt to hear that it was not up to him whether he fought or not. "But I can save you, I can keep you safe at the very least, that, that will always be my choice." He steels his features.

"You're such a hypocrite." I scowl.

"I don't care, you are to stay here where I know you will be safe and that is final." His voice did not waver, the male I was looking at was a future High Lord, the General of Autumn's armies.

"And if they siege on this tower and slit my throat before you even get the chance to return to me?" I suggest and his brows bunch as if the thought alone brought him more grief than he could stomach.

"Gods, my darling can't you just stop being stubborn, just this once?" He asked, his voice teetering on a pleading.

"No, because I cannot sit here locked in this tower while you're out there in danger," I say. "If you fall Eris," I swallow, struggling to get the words out. "If you fall and I'm not there to say goodbye one last time, I will never forgive you or myself." I knew he only was looking after my best interest and safety, but he needed to realize that this would tear me apart as much as it would to him if our roles were reversed.

"So please, if you cannot stay behind too, then let me come with you." I was not above begging, I would, and if he still didn’t permit me to join his forces I would find a way to fight beside him anyway.

He seemed to recognize that, and ever so slowly he closed his eyes and let out a deep heavy sigh, one of forfeit— and I know, that I’ve got him under lock and key. "On one condition." He seethes and I suppress the smirk on my face.

I simply raise a brow, waiting for him to go on.

"You stay away from the front lines, you do not go into the heat of the battle unless it's completely necessary." He pauses. "Your squadron's goal will be to maintain your safety, if you try to do some self-sacrificing bullshit they have permission  to knock some damned sense into you, do you hear me?" He snarled, the General looking down his nose at me.

I let my wild grin form over my features. "Yes sir." I nod, biting into my lower lip and tugging at my wrists, which he still had pinned above my head.

"Swear it." He growled, not letting my arms loose until I did so and I rolled my eyes.

"I swear on the Mother Herself. I agree to your stupid requests, and will not step foot on the front lines or self-sacrifice." I grumble.

"Good." He removes his hold from my wrists and I immediately slither my hands around the nape of his neck. "You mean everything to me, I can't lose you." He said softly, wrapping his arms around my waist securely. I lay my head against his chest, hugging me tightly.

"I know, trust me, I know," I whisper, knowing I’d react far worse if I was in his position.

I silently absorb every detail of this moment, attempting to commit the warmth of his embrace to memory, the cinnamon and clove scent of him, the reassuring feeling of his muscular arms wrapped around me. But most importantly, the sound of his heartbeat and steady breathing. I don't know what I'd do if either of those things ever stopped. I tightened my arms around him at the thought.

Slowly, his hands run up my sides, past my shoulders and arms, and intertwine our fingers.

He silently pulls me to the bed, sitting down on the edge of it and guiding me into his lap, straddling his hips. He looked at me with both fear and desire swirling in his amber irises, and reverence behind it. I smiled softly and cupped his face in my palms, remaining silent as I pressed gentle kisses down his jaw.

He moved, his lips connecting with my neck, his touch worshipping as he pulled me against him, holding me for a moment, taking solace in the warmth and comfort that bloomed when we touched.

He trails his lips down the column of my throat to my collarbone, he nips slightly at the skin, then sucked and bit and licked at it, leaving a purple mark on the area. “Having one more night with you before we leave for the camps is torture." He grunted against my freshly branded skin.

"Why’s that?" I ask, my hand going into his hair. His touch increased into a more urgent, possessive need.

"Because I could spend an eternity worshipping every bare inch of you, but I'm sanctioned only a night." He explained. "I plan to memorize you, every dip, every curve, every damned inch of you." He said softly against my skin and I smiled as his hands slipped beneath my nightgown, gripping the bare skin of my hips, and when he noticed I wasn’t wearing any undergarments he only smirked against my skin, biting at the love mark softly. “Gods, you’re good to me.” He groaned and I grinned, winding my hips over his.

He couldn’t quite contain himself anymore and flipped us over, my head falling into the pillows, legs falling open as he moved between them. He made quick work of my nightgown, pulling it off and discarding it onto the floor. "I want to burn the memory of you into my mind,” He professed, his mouth ravenous as he kissed down the valley of my breasts. “To be able to remember your scent,” He went on, my hand gripping his hair as he traveled further south. “Your touch,” His breath was hot against my lower abdomen as he neared where I craved him most. “Your taste." My mate purred, his tongue darting out and licking a long stripe from my entrance all the way to my clit.

"Eris," I gasped, my back arching as he attached his wicked mouth to that bundle of nerves, sucking on it.

"That’s what I want to remember most of all, the sound of you moaning my name,” He said, his words half a groan. “I never want to forget that." He pressed a gentle kiss to my pulsing cunt and my breath hitched. “You going to be good for me?” He asked and I nodded, eager to feel him. “Answer me,” He commanded.

“Yes, Sir,” I murmured and his canines brushed over my folds, a low growl sounding from him in reaction to my obedience, and the nickname, it always sent him spiraling when I called him that.

He mercifully didn’t drag the foreplay on for much longer, his lips sealing around my clit while two of his fingers trailed around my entrance, dripping in my arousal before dipping in and stretching me out.

I mewled at the feeling, his name the only thing on my lips as he worked me up towards my release. He was going to be the death of me if he kept this up. His fingers curved inside of me, toying with that sweet spot that made my vision blur and my breath hitch. His tongue mimicked the movement of his hand and my legs jolted, a clear sign that my release was steadily approaching. How was he so damned good at that?

He chuckled darkly against my most sensitive area, the sound sending reverberations up my spine. “You already close, baby?” He taunted and I nodded, eager to reach that beckoning, all-consuming peak. “How adorable,” His teasing remark elicited a whine from me and I tugged at his hair, beyond words.

He returned to my neglected clit, his fingers still pumping in and out of me as I barreled towards my climax.

“Come on my tongue,” He said, an order from a General. His tone alone made me release a slew of moans, my back bowing into the mattress as I gripped his hair. He groaned at the feeling of me pulling on his fiery red locks.

“Eris,” His name was a prayer on my lips, like he was a damned God and only he could grant me the pleasure I so desperately desired. At the sound, he bit at my clit and I gasped, my hands loosening as my release crashes into me in rolling waves of pleasure, casting down my spine to my core where he helped me ride it out.

He pulled away after a few more swipes of his tongue through my stimulated folds. He kissed back up my stomach, through my breasts. Every kiss was deliberately made as if he couldn’t forget how each inch of my skin felt on his lips.

I fisted his hair and brought him up hurriedly, my lips crashing against his, tasting myself on him. "I want you engraved into me, permanently." He whispered and my heart melted at his dedication, his loyalty. “My girl,” He murmured softly and I knew he was only saying what was on his mind, too caught up in his thoughts to realize he was even speaking aloud.

“I’m yours,” I say, cupping his jaw. “And you’re mine,” I grin wildly. He nods, a love-drunk look on his face.

“Body and soul,” He agreed while leaning closer, capturing my lips in another fierce kiss. His hips rut down onto my glistening cunt and I groaned at the feeling of the clothed bulge in his pants rubbing against me. He takes advantage of the sound I make because it allows his tongue to slip into my mouth, hungrily exploring with it.

His hands roam my body, his touch claiming yet reverent. One of his hands comes to my hip, pinning it in place to stop my writhing while the other gropes my peaked breast, his thumb swiping over the sensitive bud.

“Eris,” I moan, my back forming a crescent as he grinds his hips over mine again. “Please, I need you inside of me,” I beg, my hands moving from his hair to his shoulders, muscles shifting under my touch as he adjusted, pulling his pants off and whatever was beneath them fervently.

I writhe but his hand tightens at my hip, fingers singing and digging into my soft skin. “Stay still for me, can you do that for me?” He asked and I nodded.

“Yes, Sir,” I murmur and he smiles down at me, leaning forward and pressing a kiss to the corner of my lips, the touch so intimate.

“That’s my good girl,” he praises, his cock aligning with my drenched cunt, dripping down onto his length.

“You alright?” He asks, his breath mingling with mine.

“Yes, please Eris make me feel good,” I consent and he smiles, all he needed to hear before he pushed the wide head of his cock into my cunt.

He groaned as I stretched around him, my elastic walls adjusting to his thick length. “Gods, you’re so tight baby,” He grunted through clenched teeth, attempting to reign in his composure and stop himself from ramming into me full force. “Taking me so well, atta girl,” He purred, pushing in deeper and deeper, and when I was certain I was full and couldn’t take any more, he pushed in one last inch. His face contorted into a mix of pleasure and restraint as he looked down at where we connected. My wet, puffy cunt wrapped around him so perfectly.

Ever so slowly, he began to move, his hips adjusting so he was pulling out and with each gentle thrust he would slowly go deeper, grow rougher until I was used to the stimulation and all my pain morphed into pure pleasure.

“Eris,” I mewled, my head tossing back into the pillows as I dug my teeth into my bottom lip to stop myself from screaming as he buried himself to the hilt inside of me, beginning to pound into me at a fast pace.

His abdomen contracts with every push and pull of his hips, his back flexing as I clawed my nails down it, leaving marks that he’d proudly display until they faded and he’d have me give them to him again.

His pace somehow increased into something animalistic, primal. His hand on my hip slithered up to my stomach, his palm splayed across the area and he gently, slowly pushed down.

I gasped as I felt him deeper, every ridge and vein of his length rubbing against my walls. I looked down, able to see exactly where he was inside of me as he continued pushing in and out of me. I moaned at the lewd sight, my eyes rolling to the back of my head as I dug my nails into his porcelain skin.

“You see that?” He purrs, staring exactly at what I was. “That’s how deep I am inside of you, stretching you out so you fit me, and only me,” He said, his words claiming and possessive as he continued to mold me onto his cock so no other male could derive the same pleasure from me that he could, not that I’d ever want anyone else to. I mewled at the idea of only being able to receive pleasure from him, my general, my mate. No one else, not even my own fingers.

“You like that, baby?” He smiled, his lips ghosting the shell of my ear. “I do, Sir,” I nod with a pleasure drunken smile across my lips. His cock twitched as I clench around him, signaling that he was nearing his release.

“You close baby? I don’t know how much longer I can hold back,” He warned and I nodded, my hands going to the nape of his neck.

“I’m—” My legs jolt. “So close,” I gasp out, my breath hitching and gaze shuddering.

“Look at me, I want to watch while you unravel on my cock,” He said with a feral, untamed grin that sent me reeling.

With one last roll of his hips, I met my second release of many that night. My orgasm took me full throttle, my vision growing fuzzy as heat washed down me. I clench tightly around me as I find my undoing, spurring him into his own release, his warm cum seeping into my cunt and filling every crevice, pumping me full. He bit at my shoulder as he groaned, our separate ecstasies coming together, longing in the air between us as we both rode our highs, his hips still rutting into me, much slower and relaxed now.

He grunts as he pulls out, it took effort, I had been milking him dry with how tightly I was clenched around him.

He let out a sigh, our pants filling the silent room, the fire crackling in the hearth that he must’ve absentmindedly lit in the midst of his pleasure.

He sank into the mattress beside me, his movements slow yet still carrying so much power to them.

“Aren’t you going to clean me up?” I hum the teasing remark tiredly, flipping onto my side to face him.

“You think we’re done?” He arched a brow, his hand coming to my bare hip and pulling me over him so my legs were spread over his hip. “I have one more night with you until this war is over, you’re a fool if you think we’re spending any of it sleeping.”

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[gloryofroses19]

So It Goes...

Pairing: Eris Vanserra x mate!reader (Reader is apart of the Dawn and Night Court), former lover x reader

T/W: Sexual themes and allusions to sex

Walking out onto the balcony, [y/n] was met with an expectant sight. Tall, handsome but not dark. 

“I didn’t need your protection from that mongrel brute.”

Mother save her from the ego of males, she silently prayed as her eyes rolled.  “Why don’t you admit that you like me?” 

Her traitorous heart skipped a beat as she realized she fell into his trap. His proud challenging gaze and devilish smirk were evidence enough. “You first, Firefly.” 

She supposed she could but was this the time? Leaning on the balcony’s balustrade, she took in the night before her. The balcony held an autumn warmth despite the chill that had set across Day’s desert terrain. 

However, her words of gratitude died on her lips as a touch grazed her upper arm. His heat spread across the lines of her bandages, the only evidence left of the failed assassination attempt. “Why was this not properly healed? Was Thesan too cock drunk to help his childhood friend turned Court emissary?” 

“Do not talk about Thesan that way!” Ripping her arm from his hold, she glared at him. But the outburst was more out of anger for herself than Eris. Anger towards herself for failing to be there for her childhood friend when he had only ever been there for her. Even when she was a traitor to her Court while she helped her family in the Night Court. “The blade was covered in Aspidistra.” She sighed, “He did all he could, but sometimes things need to heal naturally.” 

“And the bodyguard?” The edge to Eris’ voice was not lost on her. She felt the same way when Thesan suggested it. Despite her protests, she knew her friend would only let her attend this meeting if she brought Jax. Beautiful, blonde broad Jax whose smile rivaled the sun. Who only ever wished to shine that light onto her. 

“As a general myself, I didn’t know suffocating you counted as his job.” Eris snidely commented. He knew that this was dangerous, that she was dangerous to both himself and his plans. And yet, he couldn’t stop. Damn the Mother and this female. 

“Am I interrupting something?”  An unapologetic voice spoke, breaking the tension.“Please tell me no because I surely want to join. I would love nothing more than to be between your twin flames.” 

“Lord Helion.” Returning Helion’s smile, [y/n] exhaled the breath she was holding.

“I had to fight your soldier to get in here [y/n].” Joining the pair on the balcony, Helion curiously eyed the fireling heir. “How did you get in here Eris?” 

Eris took a moment to consider. Or rather pretend to consider, his cryptic smile offering no truth. “As lord of this court, you should know of the many doors in this hall.” 

“Yes,” Helion began matching Eris’ smile before glancing at [y/n].  “Especially the ones left purposefully open.” 

As if tired of Eris games, Helion turned his attention fully to [y/n]. Bridging the gap between them, Helion took her hand in his.  “A little flower told me you’ve left your soldier quite unsatisfied in recent months.” 

“My Lilli telling you sordid stories amidst the throes of passion?”  She asked, her tone amused. How it related to her best friend’s fun with Helion she didn’t dare or care to guess. But she didn’t mind that her best friend spoke of her and Jax. She and Jax were a thing of the past and Lord Helion the diary of fae pleasures. 

“Well if you joined us, you could have done it yourself.” As he kissed the back of her hand, [y/n] realized she was wrong. Helion hadn’t been tired of Eris’ smoke and mirrors but rather was toying with Eris. Toying with the intention to figure them out. She wondered if Eris knew. 

With a clearing of his throat, Eris decided he was tired of this farce. He knew it would show weakness but the choice was between a throat clear or ripping Helion’s throat out. 

At the sound of the interruption, Helion’s eyes swept across Eris’ figure. A knowing smile spread across Helion’s face as if the Lord of this Court wouldn’t know what was brewing between them.  

Dropping [y/n]’s hand and stepping back, Helion put his hand over his heart in mock deference. “Forgive me, I’ll leave this healing salve on the table for you [y/n].”  But turning once more back to them, Helion offered a final smile, “Though selfishly,  I did very much enjoy the scent of your arousals.” 

Once Helion was gone, Eris allowed himself the moment to roll his eyes. With his gaze on [y/n], on the soft planes of her face and beautiful eyes, he knew Helion was right. If this was a taste of the smell, he would never survive this. He knew he would never survive them. 

“What?” She demanded, rueing his gaze. “What, Eris?” 

“Nothing,” Moving in closer, Eris traps her between his body and the balustrade, a pregnant space between them. “I just find it curious that he has been left unsatisfied since after the Mountain.”  With a step forward, their bodies almost touch. “Is it because of me?” 

Eris was shameless for her truths. Shameless in knowing that the bond, an ancient and primal thing, demanded nothing but clear devotion from them both. No matter how hard they fought it. 

Looking into his amber eyes, the gold flecks within them seemed to shimmer. The breath she took, didn’t steady her heart as she hoped. Instead, it made her realize how she was a hostage to her feelings in his gold cage. “A lot of things happened after the Mountain.” 

Watching her, Eris realized denial never looked so good on anyone as it did on her. 

“Mmhm,” The sound was a deep pleasant hum, and his lips tilted up teasingly. “And yet your gaze tells me differently.” 

“And what of yours?” She threw it back at him, “You are not above it all Eris. I saw your envy in Jax’s hand on my back, in Cassian’s hug, in Rhysland’s hand kiss, in Helion’s -“ 

His gaze hardened with each mention of a name until the words burst out of his mouth. “I do not need you to remind me of the casual touches you so willingly allow those males.” 

“Why? Say it.” The conflict in his eyes did not dissuade her from pressing further. “The choice is yours, Eris.” All the hardness in her voice softened, “I am yours to keep or I am yours to lose.”

“Vulnerability from the indomitable [full name]?” Eris’ deep voice fell into a conspiring whisper as he softly gazed at [y/n].  

Holding his gaze, [y/n] kept her voice steady. “Sensitivity from the unconscionable Eris Vanserra?” As his name left her mouth, his warm hand cupped her cheek. With each gentle caress, she found herself momentarily obnoxiously frozen beneath his touch.  

Neither of them knew who leaned in first. All they knew was that there was a space between them and then it was dwindling. Knew that they were gazing at each other and then suddenly their eyes were closed as their noses brushed against each other. Knew that they had had their own breaths and then suddenly they were sharing one as their lips brushed against each other’s. 

“We can’t do this.” [y/n] murmured breathlessly, as her fingers brushed the visible skin by his collar. The smooth warm expanse of skin was the only temptation she would give herself as all her strength went to not crushing her lips against his. 

“I know.” Eris wantonly replied, tilting her head to the side allowing him the reprieve of getting closer to her. Of allowing him to nuzzle his nose against hers as he tested his self control of her lips being a fraction of a space away. 

“We must be careful. If anyone were to find out, it would be disastrous.” He forced himself to not think of how sweet she felt in his hands. 

“Yes.” She forced herself to not think of how fast his heart was beating against her hand. 

Neither of them moved from their shared proximity despite those evident truths. With their foreheads leaning against each other, she supposed it would paint quite a pretty picture. She could see it now, Freye would call it ‘The Mating Bond: A Choice’. 

As if the Mother knew neither of them had the strength to separate, the door to her suite opened and closed. While the intrusion was not welcome, it was necessary. 

“Lord Eris.” Like a sunbeam breaking through a cloud, Jax watched out onto the balcony.  “I wasn’t aware sneaking into places was your thing.” 

[y/n] never quite understood when people spoke of a ‘sexy smoldering look’, how can burning slowly be sexy? But a flash, a flash spoke of uninhibited and unconscious things, of involuntary sparks that fan a fire. 

Like the flash of frustration across Eris’ face and the clench of his jaw from this interruption further sparking the flame of arousal burning inside of  her. 

She knew she could rationalize it all away. Maybe it was their placement in the Day Court. A court known for its prioritization of love and pleasure that had kept her in a constant state of arousal since her arrival. Having nothing to do with her brush with death a day ago nor arriving and seeing Eris. Eris who swaggered in looking like a man with nothing but free time to tease her. Or maybe, it was her close proximity to her former lover who once brought her immense pleasure and would do it again, if she only asked.

Or maybe, it was more primitive than that. Maybe having two handsome generals fighting over her and their constant snips for possession of her were going to drive her to insanity. Death by lust, she wondered how many beings died this way. 

“I think it speaks more about your skills than  mine when you left such a wide window of space.” Eris’ derisive tone was a stark contrast to his polite smile. 

Laughing mirthless, Jax clapped his hands behind his back. “Or maybe I let you ‘sneak in’.” 

“Did you?” 

Sensing this would only end badly, [y/n] stepped in between them. “I think it’s time to retire.”

Agreeing with the sentiment, Jax extended his right arm toward the door. “You heard the lady, goodnight lordling.” 

Stepping closer to [y/n] once more, Eris held Jax’s gaze as he leaned in to whisper in [y/n]’s ear.  “You should know by now that I always play to keep. Never to lose, Firefly.” 

And like a flame extinguished, Eris Vanserra winnowed away. Leaving [y/n] cold and short of breath by the implication. When the bond snapped, he called it a game but his words now spoke of intention. An intention to not run or reject the bond. She understood why many spoke of the mating bond as a blessing and a curse. 

“You need to be careful. I trust you, and your decisions but I don’t trust Eris. Why was Eris here? The assassination attempt very well could have been from Autumn, Beron is unpredictable. Or even Rhysland, we don’t truly know the motives of the Night Court.”

More like you don’t know the Night Court motives, she thought as she turned toward the balcony’s view. “Jax, I know Thesan sent you to watch me but I take very good care of myself. The assassin was literally dead before anyone even noticed he was there. You can relax and think of this as a vacation.”

“This is no vacation. You don't even believe that.” He joined her against the balustrade. 

“You’re right,” She sighed, wrapping an arm around herself. “We don’t know a lot, which is why we are here.” It was another pretty lie. 

Placing his hand over hers, Jax spoke with utter devotion. “I am here because I want you to be safe.” 

“Thank you.” It would be so easy to cup his face and enjoy the brush of his scruff against her hand. Easy to accept the offer of marriage sitting on the tip of his tongue. But it would all be a lie. It was after the Mountain. Now his sunshine burned and suffocated her. Now, she craved the warmth from a roaring fire and not a strong sunbeam. “I’m going to bed. If the couch is too rough, you can always take the suite next door.”

“This is Day, [y/n].” He called after her, watching her retreating figure. “These couches are made for comfort.”

A/N: Feedback is always appreciated! Inspirations: This is partly inspired by the song So It Goes by Taylor Swift and the show My Lady Jane

[multifictional]

Following there's a kind of plot and a blurb for the acotar story I mentioned. The idea has been in mind for so long and I finally wanted to give it a try!

In the long run it will have anti-feysand hints, and it’s an Eris and Lucien centred fic, so be aware. I am still debating if making the reader an oc.

Here we go..

[Y/N] Archeron always felt the pull of autumn, even as a human. The fallen leaves, the warm colours, the spicy sweets, even her birthday. For Elain, her sister, it was the sun and the way of feeding her gardens and flowers with its light.

Together in the Night Court after being thrown into the Cauldron, they both feel out of place. But while Elain has her growing bond with Lucien, [y/n] remains an outsider. With her powers still silents even after years, she feels a longing in herself she can’t quite place.

A mating bond with Eris, heir of the Autumn Court, is the last thing she expects at this point and also what she needed the most without even realising.

This is Prythian though and, even without a new villain after their heads, nothing is never easy as it seems. Especially not in a life where court rivalries seem to have their way of creating complications.

Yes, it will focused on both relationship (Eris with the reader and Elain with Lucien). It would also be set after ACOWAR with some elements of ACOSF implied (just Nesta giving up her powers to save Feyre’s family and accepting the mating bond).

As the plot says, there’s no new villain. I suck at writing all fantasy war storylines so I leave this to people who actually can write them better than me. This doesn’t mean this story won’t have plot twists or… other things. The focus will be mostly on relationships between characters, their inner turmoils and courts rivalry.

And a lot of spice, sorry not sorry. Not right away though, especially for Eris and the reader.

Keep reading if you are curious about the blurb!

Eris looked at the food you placed in front of him with a strange look on his face. It seemed as if you just slapped him, a mixture of confusion and wariness. It was as if the heir of the Autumn Court was surprised for once.

But then his mask came back.

You looked at him expectantly, heart beating fast. This was the moment of the truth, the moment where your wish could become a reality: that your new life as a Fae wasn't completely worth nothing. That, after all, you had finally found your ground. Your place in a world that was so foreign and so meant for you at the same time.

But then your expectation fell on you like a lighting strike, sending your heart from the top of your throat to the bottom of your feet. He pushed the plate towards you, refusing your offering.

“I can’t accept the bond,” he said calmly, with a coldness that was opposite to the fire running inside his veins. He was used to that. “I won’t.”

The hurt you felt in that moment was new for you. You felt the bond tugging at you in a painful way, a string threatening to broke. He felt it too, but he masked that feeling instantly, burying the need for you and cursing the timing in his mind. You blinked, refusing to let him see a single tear coming from you.

“W-what? W-why?” you stuttered. You had thought that someone like Eris wouldn’t wait a second too much to claim what was rightfully his, and yet, here you were, in front of his rejection. “I thought…”

“You thought wrong,” he bit out. “I can’t accept the food, not right now. Not until the throne is mine.”

So that was the problem? Becoming High Lord? You couldn’t quite believe that.

Eris saw the uncertainty and doubt in your eyes. Despite all his instincts were screaming at him to calm you down, he didn't do any of that. His cool demeanour usually wouldn't have fooled you so easily, but you were too taken aback to see the truth masked beneath his actions.

It was better this way.

Quite voices reached both of you. You turned to see Lucien and Elain approaching from the nearly forest, talking quietly. Eris, though, didn’t stop watching you.

He saw the flickering of longing as you watched his half-brother with your sister. That look almost crushed his usually so composed self control. So, with a single thought, he winnowed away, leaving behind the wind of autumn that always called out for you.

“Was Eris here?” Lucien asked, meeting your eyes. Elain approached you, already sensing something was off.

You were far too quick to put on a mask of your own, offering them a hint of smile. “Why would he? He’s too busy planning his head out to his next move to pass by.”

The bitterness in your tone was unmistakable.

“Want to train your power?” Lucien offered, thankfully changing subject.

You looked at you hands with a scowl then looked back at him. The thought of your power was unwelcome in your mind, especially after what happened.

“Another time,” without another word, you walked away, not giving them a second glance.

Lucien and Elain gave each other a knowing look, but didn’t press further. You heard their soft whispering, and even if envy was’t an emotion you ever allowed yourself to feel, with the sting of your mate’s rejection still clear in your soul, you couldn’t help but long for what they had.

With all of that being said, would anyone be interested in it? Should I continue??

[readychilledwine]

Lollipop pt 2

Summary - Azriel and Seraphina Vanserra will take what happened between them after the High Lords Meeting to their grave. Well, at least her father's grave.

Warnings - NSFW, oral (f rev), fingering, degradation, Dom sub dynamics, power play, shadow play/bondage, praise kink, corruption kink, use of pet names, 😻 slapping, spanking, overstimulation, Azriel being a fuck rabbit, dumbification, cock warming, virginity loss, orgasm denile, implied anal and throat fucking, a very rough first time.

An - so.... this was supposed to post at 1pm my time 😒 evidently I drafted it instead of hitting schedule post. Low key thought you all hated it and I failed. Anyways! Forgive me 💜 and don't worry, you'll still get two smut corruption pieces today, though. Ps if you see mistakes, you don't.

Read Part One Here

Seraphina rocked back in her heels as he circled her like a hawk, a small smirk playing on his face as shadows broke her skin out in chills. “How lucky am I,” he moved closer to her back, “to have such an eager, pretty mate.”

She was beautiful. Smaller than he normally liked, but he knew from Eris that Beron kept her food very controlled to prevent her from gaining weight.

Which was a damn shame in Azriel's mind. The more curve, the better, and he would change that once she was his and his alone.

His scarred hand ran up her dress before gently wrapping around her throat, testing the waters instead of diving in head first. Seraphina, in return, whimpered loudly, the scent of her honeyed arousal coming into the air. Her hands found his thighs, gripping for purchase as she tilted her head back, allowing him, and his hand, more access. “Good girl,” he praised her softly, kissing below her pointed ear. “You know how to tug the bond, right?”

“Yes.”

Azriel kissed her bare shoulder before correcting her, “Yes sir.” Serphina nodded, watching him from the mirror. Her eyes widened at the feel of something cold and sharp on the base of her spine. “Breathe,” he kissed down her neck, and in one swift movement cut her dress enough to be able to rip it off.

She was calm throughout his testing of the waters. He rose a brow at her deep breaths. “You aren't afraid?”

She shook her head, her heart racing as hazel eyes met hers in the mirror. “What exactly do you plan to do to me?”

His shadows seemed to thicken and his eyes darkened as he stared at her in the mirror, placing that sharp dagger back into it's holster. “Everything,” he growled before gripping the back of her neck and turning her into a heavy kiss.

It was electric. It was passionate. It was fire meeting shadows. Dancing together as her hands found stability and purchase on his chest after her dress fell.

He backed her to the bed instantly. Growling as he shoved her back and was instantly on her body again.

He had waited years for this. Years for a mate, an equal. The fact that he would be her first. That he would be the one to ruin her and corrupt her was just a bonus.

Bites and kisses started going lower down Seraphina's body, making her shiver. Azriel bit down on her neck, causing her back to arch and a soft whine to leave her mouth. Her hand tried shooting to her lips, hoping to trap the noises in just for shadows to rip her arms away from her, locking them above her head in a vise like grip.

Azriel tutted her softly. “Do you want to be my good girl?” She nodded eagerly, arching into his shadows and hands as they roamed her body. “Words or we stop.”

“Yes sir,” his own heart fluttered at her submission, at how quickly she was taking her role.

“Then let me hear everything. Let me hear how good I'm making you feel.”

“Yes sir.”

“And stop looking away. I want you to watch what I'm doing to you.”

She nodded again, lip pulled between her teeth as his kisses reached her breasts and his warm tongue began to play with her nipple. The soft moan that left her lips was music.

Her body was a harp, a fine tuned instrument just waiting to be played, and for once, Azriel truly felt he was a musician. He wanted to cherish her, to show her how she as his mate would spend her life treated and worshipped.

But then his mind flashed back to her pretty mouth wrapped around that candy, to her visual fantasy Rhys had happily put into his mind the second it started, and all that hope went out that window.

His sole mission was to ruin her. To ensure no other male would bring her to the brink of pleasure over and over and over the way he could. And Azriel never failed a mission.

Kisses became soft bites, making gasps and moans fall from pretty parted lips and Seraphina's amber eyes to roll back. She thought he was going to kill her. He had hardly touched her and she knew she was soaked. She knew that coil would snap within moments of him doing anything to her. A pained whine came as his teeth sank into the inner side of her right breast, bruising and marking the soft untouched skin there before turning and marking the left the same way. “Mine,” he growled causing more heat to shoot through her body. “All mine.”

His kisses began to trail lower again. Mouth coming to a halt above her center as he looked at her. “Also. Fucking. Mine.”

Azriel did not give her a chance to respond, a chance to understand what was about to happen, and that first lick had her jaw fall open, head going back to the pillow and an almost scream like whine leaving her mouth. He wasted no time, instantly feeling that noise shoot to his cock and began eating her out like it was his last meal. Every nudge of his tongue in her center, on cilt, in her folds had her moaning, arching, pulling at his shadows as they restrained her tighter, holding her wide open and completely under Azriel's control.

His hands dug into her hips, leaving bruises there instantly as well as he groaned into the taste of her before wrapping his lips around that swollen bundle of nerves and focusing a ruthless attack there. He watched her under hooded lashes as she arched, as she cried, as the foreign feeling brought tears to her eyes and began to ruin her mascara.

She'd cum just from this. Just from his tongue rolling her pretty clit, circling it, pushing down on it. She'd cum for the lightest touches. And that got him off. It made him feel like a God.

Sera felt her eyes roll back again, an unfamiliar feeling in her stomach as her breathing and moaning picked up. She needed something, needed more. “Please,” she began to beg, her voice breathy and desperate as he began fucking her core, stretching her slightly with his tongue. “Sir, please. I-”

He pulled away, a hand quickly striking her pussy before rubbing gently to soothe her. “Good girls do not beg, pet. Are you a good girl or a whore?” He glared at her slightly as she whined before smacking her again. “if you want to be treated like a fucking whore, then I will treat you like a whore.”

He turned her, allowing his shadows to restrain her on her stomach with a limb towards each corner of the bed. He placed a pillow under her hips, positioning her ass and pussy in the perfect spot for him before waiting to see if she tugged the bond, if this was too much. Her hips wiggled instead, trying to sneak attention from that trapped pillow.

He sent a silent prayer and thank you to the Mother, to the Cauldron, to any deity listening, and then he spanked her.

And again.

And again.

And again.

Watching as her milky pale skin turned bright red for him, watching as she began dripping for him. “You are a fucking whore, aren't you? Getting off on me spanking you.” He spanked her again, watching as her legs began to shake. “Are you going to cum from me spanking you?”

Shame should have filled her then and there, but it didn't. She should be ashamed of herself. She had always been taught sex was not for her. It was for the male. Her sole job was to please him and him alone. Yet here she was, seconds from finding absolute bliss as her mate did nothing more than treated her like a babe in need of punishment.

Azriel brought both hands down on her ass, and watched as she screamed, body jolting and her tight hole clenched around nothing. She came screaming his name, tears streaming down her face. He ran his hand up and down her back, slowing her breathing through the High before running his hands back to her pussy and feeling those soaked folds.

“You have to relax,” he warned gently as she stiffened. “If you don't relax, I will end up hurting you, and I don't want to hurt my perfect pet, do you understand?”

“Yes sir,” Sera tried relaxing. Focusing on the humming bond. On his amusement, his pleasure in seeing her like this. She whimpered as two fingers ran from her clit to her whole, lubricating those thick scarred digits in her nectar.

Azriel pushed his middle finger in. He felt his own eyes roll back, imagining the feeling of her soft tight walls on his cock as she let out a breathy moan. He began pumping immediately, not giving her time to adjust and then inserted a second finger before leaning over her to put his hand in her hair and pull, forcing her to arch her back more as she began to cry again. “Gonna feel so good on my cock, pet. So fucking tight and warm.” The praise warmed her immediately. Another wave of heat and wetness flowing through her. “This pussy is mine, you hear me? You are mine. You belong to me.”

Seraphina felt her heart flutter at that. At the idea of being his and his alone. At the idea of no one else stretching her like this. Her walls began to twitch as he found a spot he had been searching for and began to ruthlessly curl and thrust his fingers in to it.

She was soaking the pillow, her thighs, his hand. Azriel's shadows began to remove his clothing, freeing his aching cock and allowing him to stroke it in time with his fingers. Sera was panting again, her hips trying to meet his hand only to be held in place as he felt her approaching the edge again.

Before she could, he pulled away, landing a harsh spank on her bruising ass before standing and removing his leathers completely.

“All in one or gently. Pick now.” His desperate voice sent a wave of power through Sera. The idea of him being this worked up for her while she did nothing but submit to his will make her glow with feminine pride.

“Just fuck me.”

He was surprised by the answer, hand coming to use her juices as lubricant on his cock before he got behind her with a dangerous grin. “I'd tell you to hold on to something, but it appears your hands are a little preoccupied.”

It was pleasure, pain, completion, everything. Sera felt herself fall into shock before a loud wailing moan filled the room along with the scent of her Maidenhood breaking.

Azriel's hand gripped the sheet next to her head as he too let out a pitched moan. She felt exactly as he had imagined. Warm, velvety walls pulsed around him. He gave a gentle teasing thrust, watching as her mouth fell back open. Her make up always ruined, her hair a mess, body littered in bites and bruises.

He had not been gentle with her once tonight, and he was about to start now unless she asked. He placed a foot solid on the bed and grabbed her waist. Then he began.

Seraphina saw the heavens when he moved. His thick cock dragging in and out of her, lighting every inch and nerve on fire as she could do nothing more than lay there moaning and crying out for him.

Her walls were twitching, begging for release instantly as they pulled him in deeper and deeper. He was going to fuck her into two pieces. She hadn't even had the chance to look at his cock, but Gods she felt it. She felt it brushing her cervix with each thrust. She felt it hitting places healers didn't even have names for yet. She felt it pulling her apart inch by inch until she was the perfect sleeve for him.

Azriel watched as her eyes fluttered shut, a small smile forming on her face, and she began to drool slightly.

He had fucked her dumb this easily. Fucked every brain cell from her and rendered her completely to his will.

Seraphina would be easy to train. Easy to make his personal whore. His perfect little mate, his perfect little wife, his perfect cock sleeve, always ready, dripping, and eager for him.

He fucked her until dawn broke through the window. Taking her cunt, her throat, her ass. He came on her face, inside of her, on her tits. She was soaked in his seed, her essences, his and her sweat.

He held her tight in the tub. Bouncing her on his cock as she sat in his lap crying from overstimulation. He released into her again, triggering another orgasm from her that left her in a silent scream and whimpers. He didn't allow her off, forcing her to sit chest to chest with him and warm his cock.

No words passed between them.

No words needed to.

When she tried to speak, he pushed two fingers into her mouth. “We will talk when master is ready. Am I understood, whore?”

She nodded, gagging as the digits pushed in further and maintaining eye contact like he had taught her. He hardened inside of her tender abused cunt again. And he lifted her off and turned her.

The slow realization hit her. 12 orgasms wasn't enough.. 8 hours wasn't enough. Her mate was insatiable.

And she was all too happy to just be used.

[azrielsshadows42]

Hollowed out

Azriel x Eris

This is the fic I made for my giftee; @gravitysthrall! I'm so excited and happy I got to participate in this and a big thanks to all the amazing people who organised it. Dividers by @tsunami-of-tears

Word Count: 6039

Warnings: Angst, Swearing, Hurt/comfort, Fluff, some suggestiveness, brief panic attack/breakdown

The halls are quiet. It is to be expected, given the late hour, most are in bed by now, yet here I walk, up and down halls, waiting. For what? Eris, the High Lord of Autumn, to finally come out of his hobbit hole of an office and take a break. My pace slows as I cross that door, the royal bed chambers. Neither Eris nor I have used them since Berons' death. It bears too many bad memories, haunts the residents of the forest house.

My gaze lingers on the ancient wood arch, the intricate pictures carved meticulously by skilled hands. It must have taken hours, such a shame that the details get overlooked by everyone because of a reputation left by someone else.

My footsteps continue on silently as I make my way to my mate, guided by that golden thread. He has blocked his side of the bond. Again.

I try not to let the hurt creep in, I understand he's a High Lord now, his duties and responsibilities have grown exponentially since the war, he can only split his time between so many things. The logical part of my brain tries to convince me of this, but my heart cries out for help. Lately, the bond is blocked more often than not and between paperwork and my missions, physical contact hasn't been available either.

I stop in front of his door. If it weren't for the wards, I'm sure I'd hear the furious scratching of a quill on paper.

Pushing aside the barrier, I walk in, making my steps audible for his benefit. Eris doesn't lift his head, or hum, or acknowledge me in any way shape or form and my heart cracks a little more. It's been like this, cold and unfeeling, for far too long, I don't know how much more of it I can take.

"Eris?"

Nothing.

My jaw tightens.

"High Lord" I grit out between clenched teeth. Is this really what I've been reduced to? Just another fae begging for the favor of his Lord instead of the love of his life, his mate, his husband.

"Yes, Azriel?" I swallow down my rising anger, I didn't come here to argue, and the sound of my name on his tongue almost drowns my temper anyway. The soft care in my voice comes naturally.

"Eris, don't you think it's time to take a break? You've been in here for hours, you haven't eaten or had something to drink since this morning, come, have dinner with me" The time for dinner has long since passed, but I'd do anything to make him walk out of this room, where he has unknowingly imprisoned himself.

"Please" The desperation in my tone isn't subtle, and I can't bring myself to be embarrassed about it because that's what I am. Desperate. A child begging for scraps of attention.

He stays silent for what feels like an eternity longer, the clock ticking, time running through my fingers, unable to grab hold, just swept along with the tide like dust under the carpet.

The scribbling of his quill pauses, he sighs, looks into my eyes, and for just a moment, I see the affection he once had for me. For a moment, hope squeezes my heart and I don't want it to end.

Eris's amber orbs study me, then wander back to the paper, however the reluctance to do so is the thread I grasp to tug him back to me.

"I promise the paper's will still be there when you get back, an hour is all I ask" I wanted to ask for two, but I feel I'm already asking for too much. At this point, I'd cherish ten minutes.

He sighs again and rubs his eyes, the bags beneath them a stark contrast to his sallow skin. Even his freckles seem to have lost their vibrancy.

"Alright, I'll have dinner with you, right after I finish this document, I'll come down to our room" In any other situation, I would have bristled at how he made spending time with me sound like a chore, but I was too happy with his acquiescence.

I walked calmly out the room, giving my mate a smile, which he returned in a grimace like fashion. Once I crossed the threshold and was out of Eris's line of sight, my shadows hurtled themselves toward the kitchens. I invited Eris to dinner, but I didn't actually have anything prepared, and none of the staff would be awake, it's almost one in the morning.

The shadows were giddy, skittering along the walls and floor, some of them climbing the ceiling. Their voices all flooded me at once, fighting for space in my head, they were yelling about what to make. One of them suggested a three course meal and they were all too happy to jump on that idea.

We don't have time to make a feast, and Eris certainly won't have time to eat all of it. Think simple, we'll prepare a charcuterie board, gather some crackers, bread and cold meat, then we'll return to the room.

They grumbled their dissatisfaction, but complied anyway. They scoured the kitchen, slicing sourdough, whole grain, flat bread, and gathering different crackers, as well as an insanely wide assortment of cheeses. They had ham and pulled pork and salami, plating it as if it were to be presented at a banquet. They had always loved doing these sorts of things for Eris, and after being deprived of it for so long, they were going to turn simple into gourmet.

They helped me carry it all to our room, the bed was still made, telling me that Eris hadn't slept at all last night. Servants weren't allowed in our room, I was on a mission, and Eris never made the bed, he didn't see the need if you were just going to mess it up again the next night. I closed my eyes, letting the memory wash over me.

"You don't make your bed in the morning?" Eris rolled his eyes.

"No. Not anymore at least, not since I was the general" He picked up the pillow I had just placed putting it askew again and I huffed.

"Why not? You're a neat freak with everything else, but your bed is the only exception?"

"I see no point in making our bed when we mess it up so frequently" He pulled me toward him by the arm, wrapping his around my neck when our bodies collided. He guided the both of us backwards until the back of his knees hit the bed frame, Eris spun us around mid-fall so I was pinned under him. He leaned in so close we shared each breath and his eyes darkened, flitting between mine and my lips. I surged up, closing the distance, and threaded my fingers in his red locks.

The bed was indeed, messed again.

I set down all the plates, leaving enough room for Eris and I to sit against the pillows, the shadows fussed over every detail while we waited for my mate.

Ten minutes passed.

Then thirty.

Then an hour. Still no sign of my husband. I couldn't even feel the exhaustion, the anger was too great, but still I stayed.

The sun was starting to peak over the horizon when I finally decided to leave. The shadows drooped like wilted plants, my wings dragged slightly. I tried to figure out what I was feeling.

I had every reason to be angry, to be furious, but I wasn't. Was I worried? Did some part of my subconscious think something had happened to Eris? It didn't feel like it. My mind raced through all the options, as I trudged to one of the spare rooms. I didn't want to sleep in our bed, so I lay awake in another, but it wasn't till the first bell rang, signalling five am that I found the word I was searching for.

Hollow.

That's how I felt. Hollow.

It sent a pang through my heart and I wanted to curl up into a ball and cry, but I had no tears left. Day after day, night after night, Eris and I had become strangers and it hurt. It fucking hurt.

My eyes wandered over the mahogany ceiling aimlessly, my mind swimming in doubt and shattered expectations. Expectations. I scoffed at myself in my head. More like childish wishes.

The pain seeped back into me, and I made my decision.

I have to leave.

Leave Autumn, leave Eris, leave this entire mess of a life. Just for a bit. Just for some space to think and gather myself, to figure out my next move because if this is to be my life with him, my mate. Even in my own thoughts, my voice cracked.

Then I'll have to- I couldn't complete the thought. Rejecting the bond, ending what Eris and I had spent years building... I don't think I could survive it. I don't think I'd want to.

I packed a bag. It didn't contain much, just some clothes. I still had a few pairs back at the cabin, but I preferred these, they were more comfortable.

And they smell like Autumn! The shadows pitched in, I ignored that comment however. I didn't want to admit that even while angry at him, I still sought out Eris for comfort. I did not need to be reminded right now that I need him much more than he needs me.

Usually when I wanted to clear my head, I'd fly, but the weight in my chest was so heavy, I feared I'd plummet like a rock.

The shadows swarmed around me, pulling me from my empty bedroom, to the empty cabin. The second I had fully materialised, Rhysand was in my head.

Azriel? What are you doing here? Are you alright? Did something happen?

It had taken time for the inner circle to accept my mating with Eris; they had eventually come around, but none of them really trusted him, especially not Rhys. He was always just waiting for something to happen, waiting for Eris to do something so that he could take me back to the Night Court.

I knew it was because he cared, and that the worry in his tone was genuine, but I was too tired to explain to him what was going on.

I'm fine, everything's fine.

I could feel him lift his eyebrow, could picture the 'Do you think I'm a blind idiot' look on his face.

I just need a break from... From what? Eris? I couldn't say that, not because it wasn't true, because technically, it was, but because it would hurt to admit it.

I decided to forgo the rest of my sentence. Is it ok if I stay here? Just for a few days.

A pause ensued, then in a much softer tone, an understanding one, he said; Of course Azriel, you will always be welcome here.

And I felt in my bones that it was true, I just didn't want to think about what that might mean for me.

Eris's Pov

I was going to break that infernal clock, tick tick ticking in the back of my head like the pressure of how little time I had wasn't enough already.

I had just finished the paper I was working on, but one more couldn't hurt, it would just mean less work for tomorrow, maybe then I could spend some time with my mate. Liar, there is always more work to do the next day.

I pushed the voice down, trying fruitlessly to smother it. Azriel was right, I needed a break. And right after this paper, I'd get one. Azriel and I would have dinner, and maybe, just maybe, we could fall asleep in each other's arms again. What I wouldn't give for that?

I finished putting the last signature on the bottom of the page to approve the project. It was for some agriculture thing, I didn't have enough head space to really go into too much detail, just enough to know it would help.

I got up from the desk, stretching, but my eyes got caught on another document. That one is quick to fill out, it will take me five minutes at most, Azriel will understand, he always does.

I haven't thanked my mate enough for the patience he's had with me, I haven't had the time to, but I will. Once all the things from my father's reign have been sorted, I'll be able to show him how much I appreciated his love and support.

The clock continues its ticking, and I'm only vaguely aware of the time passing, pulled once again into the onslaught of paperwork that buries my desk. One report turned into two, then to five, then a stack.

I'm pulled out once again when a thud is heard to my right. My head snaps up, eyes locking with the target. It's one of the early rising servants, dropping off another stack of papers and documents for me to sign. I whip around to look at the clock to see it is indeed eight o’clock in the morning.

I look back at her and she smiles sheepishly, then leaves. They may be light footed, but I should have heard her open the door. Had she been an assassin, I'd be dead. The lack of sleep really is getting to me.

I run my hands over my face and pick up the quill again, resigned to another day filled with endless words on paper and that bloody clock.

Sliding over the next thing, I can't help but pause at this nagging feeling that I've forgotten something. It claws at my insides, churning my gut, but I have to focus on what's important, I have to-

Azriel

Shit!

I completely forgot. I drop my quill, and shove the doors aside. I'm walking so fast that it could be considered a run but I need to see Azriel, my mate. I need to apologise, to explain, to-

The room is empty save for the spread of meat and cheeses with an assortment of bread and crackers now plagued with flies. My head pivots, searching for any hint of Azriel, the only sign he'd been here was his lingering scent.

I took a moment to breathe it in. Night chilled mist and cedar. Cauldrons I loved his scent, and his wings, and his smile. I just loved him.

His wingspan could sometimes be a pain in my ass (literally) but cauldron boil and fry me, it felt heavenly.

I opened my side of the bond reaching out, but all I was met with was solid walls. My heart stopped. Have I finally pushed him too far?

I tug harder, but am met with no response, dread settles in my stomach. What have I done?

I get the creeping feeling of being watched, and a few of my mate's shadows twirl into view. Usually the sight of them would reassure me, but something about their presence now was foreboding.

"Where is Azriel?" My voice is a mere whisper, but it seemed to echo in the room. They just sat there, dancing on the spot, never still, never motionless. It was unnerving. The slow fluidity of this dark entity, nothing in nature moved like that.

They finally left that spot on the floor, racing down the hall. "Wait" They did not.

I chased after them, barely keeping the swirls of black in view, every time they turned a corner, I thought I'd lose them. They slithered under one of the guest bedrooms, and without question, I flung the doors to the side.

Nothing.

No Azriel.

I looked to the shadows in question. "Why have you brought me here?" Obviously they gave no verbal response, they couldn't, but they just... disappeared. Vanished into thin air. Leaving behind a note in Az's handwriting. I just looked at it, thinking of all the effort he'd put in to be able to write in fancy script.

I picked up the note, reading it quietly to myself. Then reading it again, and again until it stuck.

Dear Eris,

If you're reading this, you've finally come out of your office. You do not need to worry about me, I'm safe in the Night Court, Rhysand knows I'm here.

Don't come get me. When I'm ready, I'll come back, but for now, I just need some time to think.

Sincerely, Your Shadow Azriel

In so few, simple words, I felt my heart crumble. I desperately clawed at the wall blocking me from my mate, but it held strong.

I could feel the panic rise within me, my breath coming in short gasps. No. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. This can't be happening. I can't- I can't do this without him. I can't. I need him, I need my mate I-

My knees gave out from beneath me, and I hit the floor hard, the sudden bite of pain becoming a small drop in what was quickly gathering to be an ocean.

Azriel left. My mate left.

The words clanged through me with such clarity, I couldn't have stopped the tears if I tried. I broke down for the first time in centuries. Azriel was gone and it was all my fault, I drove him away, I neglected him.

Just like my father did to my mother.

That was the last straw. Loud ugly sobs fell from my lips, my body caved in on itself. How could I let this happen, how could I do this to him?

I stayed there for hours, until I had no more tears, until my throat was raw and no sound could come out. I crawled up onto the bed, curling my body around the pillow he'd used on his last night here. He said not to go after him, that he needed space. I could give him that. I will give him that. Even if it hurts.

3rd person Pov

Eris got up the morning after, feeling more tired than he had all month, his bones felt like they were made of granite but as frail as sandstone.

Days passed by painfully slow. He tried to focus, to tackle those papers that had driven him from his mate, but everything felt overwhelming. The sun was too bright, the stacks too high, his bed too warm, nothing felt right. Eris couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, he couldn't breathe. He felt like he was suffocating, choking on his own actions and he just wanted his mate back in his arms. He was prepared to do anything to bring Azriel home.

But alas, no word from the shadow singer had reached his ears. It had been twelve days, neither Az nor anyone else from the Night Court had told him anything. It was driving him mad. Had something happened? Or was this really the end?

Another tear slipped out. His eyes burned from all the crying, all the sleepless nights filled with worry and anxiety. There was this perpetual feeling of nausea that he couldn't seem to shake, no tonic or pill worked.

He couldn't take it anymore, he needed to know. Eris winnowed into the town house. He knew Rhysand didn't live there, but it would get his attention.

He didn't have to wait long before the High Lord and Lady of Night as well as the general stood before him, all with scowls on their faces.

"Eris" Rhysand said tersely, his jaw clenched. Eris's eyes were bloodshot, but he couldn't find it in himself to care.

"How is he? Is he alright?" The High Lord's voice came out soft but clear.

"Azriel will speak to you when he is ready" Feyre spoke this time, eyes narrowed.

"I know, I'm not here to force him to see me, I just- I need to know he's ok" The waver in his voice was slight, but there. They all picked up on it, however, had no intention of faltering.

Cassian was about to add his two cents when Azriel appeared in the shadows.

His face was unreadable, but the knotted black curls and massive eye bags were a testament to how much he had been struggling despite being the one to have initiated the space.

Eris swallowed but didn't speak. Just stared at his lover with desperation.

Everyone stared at Azriel, waiting for him to say something.

"Thank you for defending my privacy, but I would like to speak to Eris alone" It was not lost on the red headed fae that Azriel had called him by his name, instead of saying 'my mate' like he usually would have.

Rhysand, Feyre, and Cassian slowly left, they didn't winnow away, just vacated the room, and Rhysand put up wards to give them privacy, staying close in case Eris tried anything.

For a long time, they stood in silence, neither knowing what to say until Eris cleared his throat. "Are you sure you're ready to talk to me? I did not come here with the intention of forcing an interaction between us." The words hurt him, he didn't want to leave without his mate, but if that's what Azriel wanted, he would give him that.

"If you need more- more space then-"

"No"

"...No?"

"I'm done with space. We need to figure this out. Now or never."

Eris nodded, but he was unsure if he should say something, or wait for Azriel to speak first.

Azriel sighed, and sat down at the table, motioning for Eris to do the same. Somehow, this felt worse than standing, but he complied nonetheless.

Azriel rested both arms on the table, fingers interlocked. He raised his hazel eyes to look into Eris's amber ones.

"I'm going to ask you a question, Eris, and I need you to answer honestly, can you do that?" He nods.

"Do you still want this bond, or would you rather have us reject it?”

How could he say that? Eris was appalled, he knew he'd been neglectful, but Azriel couldn't actually believe he regretted this, regretted them, could he? No, it was unthinkable, Eris refused to believe it.

"Azriel, you don't mean that, you can't." He shook his head, his heart felt like it was being squeezed to the point it might explode.

"Answer the question." Azriel's voice was devoid of emotion. Eris grit his teeth, not liking the tone his mate was using on him. That voice was for prisoner's, not him.

"No, Azriel, I don't want to reject the bond" There was a little bite to his voice before a realisation hit him. His words came out small, and meek.

"Do you?"

Eris prayed that wasn't the case, he would beg on his hands and knees if he had to, he would burn those papers, and close off his office if that's what he wanted. Eris was prepared to give up his throne if it would make Azriel reconsider.

"No, I don't, I never have" The relief flooded Eris, the grip on his heart loosened just a bit, just enough for him to breathe again.

"But things cannot go on the way they have. I am tired of not being your first priority, of not even being your tenth!" The spymaster raised his voice for the first time that night. "There is always something that needs to happen. There's always paperwork; documents, complaints, reports, there is always some tradition in one of the villages that people barely remember because Beron forbade it that suddenly wants you to attend."

His breathing was growing heavier with each point, and it was clear he'd been keeping this bottled inside for a long time. "Then finally we find a time in which our free times could align through no small effort, and out of nowhere, the Lords call for an emergency meeting, to discuss their decreased cash flow."

Everything he was saying was true, Eris couldn't defend himself, not that he had any ground to stand on in the first place, so he just listened to Azriel lament.

"And I know, believe me, I know that being a new High Lord is a lot of pressure. I don't pretend to understand what you have gone through nor what you are currently going through, and I've tried to be patient but-"

Azriel's voice cracked mid sentence. He took a deep breath, and Eris had to strain his ears to hear him now.

"I can't. I can't live like this. Barely seeing you for weeks on end just to be brushed off I-" He was visibly shaking now, the tremor in his words reflected his state and his eyes, his beautiful hazel eyes had taken on a glassy sheen.

"Eris, it should pain you to be away from me-"

"It does" He promised, staring at Azriel's face, committing every detail to memory like he was going to slip out of his grasp.

"Not like it hurts me" Az was shaking his head, his heart on his sleeve.

Eris scoffed. "What are you talking about? I hate the distance just as much as you do, more, even. This week especially has been so painful-"

"Clearly not painful enough!"

"What do you mean 'Not painful enough'? It has been excruciating for me! How would you even know? You haven't been around-"

"Because you're not the one falling apart!"

"Of course I'm falling apart Azriel! You left! How was I supposed to feel about that?!"

"Nothing. You were supposed to feel absolutely nothing"

"What the fuck are you trying to say?" Eris was seething now. How dare he insinuate that this hadn't been hard on him too?

"That you. Don't. Care, until there are consequences"

Eris opened his mouth to retort, but was interrupted before he could. "I was gone for three hours. Three hours, Eris, before you even noticed I'd left. Three hours before you came out of your office like you'd said you would. 'My word to you will always be true, this I promise' that was one of our vows to each other, and I cannot count the amount of times you've broken it."

He was stunned into silence, the weight of it all crashing down on him hard. "You had been blissfully unaware while I second guessed our mating"

Tears were streaming down both their faces, wild and unrestrained. Their breathing was ragged, and despite the cacophony of emotions, they both just wanted to comfort the other. But too many feelings left unresolved prevented them from doing so, instead, they stewed in the silence, the only sounds being the occasional sniffle or sharp exhale.

"Azriel I- I'm so sorry. I didn't realise what all this was doing to you. I should have known, should have seen the signs. As your husband, as your mate I should have- Cauldrons Azriel, I can't express how sorry I am, words don't do it justice, but I will find a way to make it up to you. I will. I don't know how, yet, but that, I can promise you."

The shadow singer nods. Eris wants to ask what happens now, does he return, or will he stay in the sanctuary of the Night Court? He waits for him to say something, but is left empty handed. He is the one to nod this time, winnowing back to his court.

Eris lies awake, thinking of ways to make it up to Azriel. If it were anyone else, he'd formulate a plan to execute some grand gesture, but this was Azriel. Azriel does not do grand gestures. It should make it easier but instead, it leaves Eris walking circles in his head, tormenting himself with wanting to do more, but knowing his lover wouldn't like it, and everything else just feeling like it would fall short.

It wasn't until well into the night that Eris felt Azriel return to the forest house. He held his breath, both wishing for him to take the corridor to the bedroom he occupied (It didn't feel right to sleep in their shared bed without Az there) and praying he didn't. What could he say? He was nowhere near ready to talk to Azriel, yet that was all he wanted to do.

Azriel went to a different bedroom, one just a few passageways to the left. His heart sank, however he scolded himself saying it was for the best, and that he hadn't earned being in the same bed yet.

Although when a small little shadow crept up, twining itself in between Eris's long fingers, he couldn't help but bring the little creature closer to his face, and smile.

Time skip

Over the next two weeks, Eris tried his best to earn Azriel back, he had started by showing up at his door and asking him out on a date. He half thought that Azriel would decline and slam the door in his face but by some miracle, the shadowsinger found it in him to take Eris's olive branch.

That first date seemed to open the flood gates. Every other day they'd be out, in the forest, a village, they'd even gone out of Autumn once or twice. The Lords made sure to make their displeasure known and the piles of paperwork were stacking up again faster than Eris could make them go down, but he ignored it in favor of his mate.

He obviously couldn't neglect his High Lord duties completely, he still held audiences when requested, and he did what paperwork he could, but he'd finally taken a leap, and removed many of the lords from the board.

He still hadn't found replacements for all of them, but it was some much needed progress. Having people he could trust to surround him and try to guide his rule instead of the power hungry toads admittedly made it quite a bit easier. Eris felt like he was in control of his responsibilities for the first time in years, since he started his reign, actually.

But it wasn't until recently, that Azriel truly forgave him.

Eris had walked up to Azriel's door, just like he had numerous times in the past fortnight. He waited nervously for him to answer, running his fingers through his hair and smoothing out his clothes. He loved Azriel, truly, but he absolutely hated how he was reduced to a twenty year old with no experience every time he asked him out.

The door opened, and there stood the love of his life donning Autumn finery. They had gotten into many teasing arguments about the garments over the years, Azriel always claiming it was over the top and Eris countering that he was technically a High Lord now too, even if he didn't bare the title (Because Azriel had refused, not because Eris hadn't offered) so the clothes were befitting someone of his station.

Azriel had laughed uproariously at that.

"Hello," Azriel said from inside the door frame. "I don't believe we had a date scheduled, unless I'm mistaken?"

"You're not, mistaken, that is. I wanted to surprise you, if that's alright?" Azriel wasn't overly fond of surprises. To be frank, neither was Eris, but he'd think this might be an exception.

Azriel raised both eyebrows. "Consider me surprised"

Eris blushed. Fucking. Blushed. What in the name of the mother did this male do to him?

"Would you- ahem- Would you please come with me into the dining hall?" Eris said, clearing his voice when it came out a bit too timid.

Azriel nodded slowly. "Sure, just let me change into something else"

"No one else will be there, so just that is fine." He insisted, because if he waits any longer, he might get cold feet and back out.

Once again surprise spreads across the Illyrians face, usually it is Eris who is so adamant on being 'properly adorned' for such occasions, even in the comfort of their own home.

"Alright" He says, closing the door behind him. "Lead the way, High Lord"

Oh, Azriel was trying to kill him, wasn't he? He never calls him High Lord unless he's angry, or wants Eris's attention on him for... other reasons. Much more pleasurable ones. He really hopes it's the second option and gulps as he steps in front of his mate to lead.

He holds the door as his beloved shadow steps in, taking in the spread laid out before them.

"Apologies if it's not on par with the usual cuisine served, I'm not the best cook, even with specific, and detailed instructions."

The male whips around staring at him. "You made all this?"

Eris nods "I did. Figured I had to make up for the dinner I'd missed. And, you know, all the ones before that." He breathes in deeply, preparing himself for his next words. "Look, I know that what I did was wrong, even if I never meant to hurt you, I did. And I'm not afraid to admit that I still don't quite know how to fully bring you back to me, but I-"

The air is knocked out of him by a body colliding with his, preventing the rest of his speech from leaving his lips.

"You just did" The words are mumbled into the junction of his neck, but he hears them just fine. The stress, and tension melts away as he wraps his arms around Azriel for the first time in way too long.

Tears of joy appear in the corners of his eyes but they are wiped away by his mate's thumbs as his scarred hands cup Eris's face. The words he so desperately needed falling effortlessly from the spymaster's lips.

"I love you, and I forgive you." Their emotions flood the bond and they fall to the floor together, holding one another in a tight embrace.

"Thank you, I promise, I will never treat you like that again. Never."

A few days later

Sunlight fell through the curtains onto their faces, gently waking up the two lovers. They were having a slow morning, it was ten and they still hadn't even gotten up for breakfast. They chose to instead lay in each other's embrace, enjoying the tranquility of it.

Tranquility that was broken by a knock. Eris sighed, running his hands over his face. He stretched and quickly threw on some pants along with a robe to at least cover himself a little.

He opened the door, shocking the servant on the other side who hastily lowered her gaze upon realising her High Lord was shirtless, choosing instead to speak to the floor rather than look him in the eyes.

"High Lord, I'm greatly sorry to disturb you, but the Lords are requesting a meeting on an improved payment plan for the agricultural contributors of Autumn, as well as some trade routes."

He nods, thanking her. When he walks back, Azriel is still in bed, eyes closed, the covers only concealing half of him. Eris smiled and dreaded leaving him.

"The lords want to hold a meeting about a few comings and goings of Autumn." He was sure Azriel had heard, especially with the little shadows constantly whispering information to him.

His mate only hummed, the picture of relaxation. "It's alright, you can go" Damn Azriel and his uncanny ability to read him, of course he knew that was the real reason why he'd repeated the information to him.

"Are you sure?" He asked, he never wanted to feel that again, never wanted to drive his mate away, so he just had to ask one more time.

"Yes, I'm sure." Eris accepted this. If Az really wasn't ok with it, he would say something.

Eris busied himself with getting ready, he took a quick shower, combed his hair and got dressed. It wasn't until he had just finished primping and was almost out the door that Azriel spoke up, calling Eris's name.

"Yes, my love?"

"I'm going to organise lunch for us, so I'll be waiting for you in the dining hall, go there once you're done." Eris stayed in the doorway, sensing there was more. "And afterwards... would you like to mess the bed with me?" A mischievous grin painted his face.

"Always"

A/n: That's the end! I hope you enjoyed, it was a bit longer than I thought it'd be but I'm just glad it's done on time. This was the first fic I've ever written proper angst for, hope it wasn't horrible.

Have a very Merry Christmas

From: @azrielsshadows42

To: @gravitysthrall

Thank you @acotargiftexchange

[tearsaura]

In the woods, the monster awaits // Eris Vanserra x reader

Based on this comment by @astarionsdurge thank you so much for this prompt! I hope you like it.

picture is from pinterest: tanema3

Word count: 1.2k

The estate was much quieter nowadays. Visiting it served only two purposes: seeing my mother or following up on court business. It always felt cold, which is ironic since our power was quite the opposite.

My father’s office was the furthest away at the highest floor and even that didn’t seem far away enough from us. As I climbed up the stairs and entered his space a few moments later, the familiar smell of his cologne hit me and it made my skin crawl.

“We must check in with y/l/n. The magic on our borders is wearing of. There has been an increase on beasts in the woods and if they get any closer, they’ll feast on the village by noon and on us by the evening.” Beron said without looking up from his papers as I stepped closer to his desk.

Well hello to you too father!

Yes, I am doing alright thank you for asking!

Our army shrinks with every day that passes but you already knew that and you refuse to do anything about it! What will you do when there are none left, even for you?

How are you feeling? Any chance that you step down and free this court from its misery?

My father, the high lord of the autumn court, summoned me at dawn to complain, like he usually did. He did take me by surprise that he decided to do something about it instead of delegating it to someone else. Maybe the thoughts of being a meal for some beasts did worry him.

“Shall I meet up with him today?”

“No, I already scheduled to meet up and I want you to accompany me, I need to have a word with him first but after that it is going to be your problem.” He said, raising from his chair.

With other words, he wanted the people from the village to think that he does care about them. That’s what he usually does: Goes to the poorer villages occasionally, act as if he cares, promises them that he works something out to help them but never actually does it. He wordlessly walked out, his guards trailing after him. I sighed, counted to ten, and went after them.

The horse ride to the boarders went quietly thankfully. I tuned out my fathers talking and took in the lands. The autumn court was beautiful, especially the forest. We reached the said place at the border shortly, and nobody was there. I got off my horse and gave him something to eat before joining my father, who was already seething. It was astonishing, how short his patience ran.

“This is unacceptable. Where is the old man?” Beron complained as he dismounted his horse, walking further into the woods.

Please dear mother, let this man get lost in there and never come back.

“This is a forest, he probably needs some time to find us because it looks all, you know, the same.” I claimed, walking after him whilst keeping my distance.

“I am the high lord of the autumn court! I do not have the time or the nerve to wait on some old Witcher to find his way to the place I ordered him to get to on time. He’s a Witcher don’t they sense people?”

“We don’t. We only sense the magic, or well, the lack of it.” A feminine voice called and as I turned around, I was sure that reality had left me. The unknown woman came towards us, my father taking a few steps back as his guards stepped in front of him.

She nearly made me drop to my knees. There were no words on this world that would do right in describing how beautiful she was. No music could come close to the sound of her voice. Without thinking, I stepped closer to her.

The woman raised up her hands in surrender. “No need to draw weapons. I am not here to harm you, high lord. My father sends me: y/l/n, the old Witcher?” she said, a coy smile graced her red lips. Of course, I personally hadn’t seen her father but her signature light grey, almost white, eyes gave her away as a family member of the witches.

“Why didn’t he come himself? I specifically told him that he should come. One would think that the order of the High lord where to take-” “He went to another weak spot. Sadly, this area isn’t our only problem. It took me a while to find you because the magic is missing in multiple places.”

I swallowed. One leakage was bad, but manageable. Multiple where a bad sign. Something was wrong.

“So, what can we do about it?” I asked, her eyes now fixating on me. They looked just like the sky during autumns stormy afternoons. Very hard to look away from, pulling me deeper into this trance.

“You are?”

“Eris. Eris Vanserra.” She continued to look at me, her head tilting slightly. She had a mole right over her upper lip on the left side.

“My oldest son.” I hadn’t even realised that my father had stepped closer too. “He will take over this matter and you’ll correspond directly to him. Unfortunately, I must go. Court affairs.” He said, before he went to his horse, his guards trailing after him.

She waited for a few moments, watching my father and his guards leaving and as they became a small figure in the distance, her attention turned back to me.

“I feel sorry for lady autumn. It must be tiring to listen to this man for even a second, I fear.”

“You have no idea.” I replied and she gave me another smile. She had dimples.

“So, my father and I are working on resurrecting the old magic that was used. But it is many centuries old and all the tomes we have need to be translated first. We will work with lesser magic until we have it but that would only last days or weeks at most. For the time being I would stay here to make sure that everything is alright.” She said, stemming her hands on her hips as she observed.

She smelled divine. Oranges with a hint of vanilla. He wanted to wrap her scent around him for the rest of his life.

“The Forrest house isn’t far from here. You can stay there.” I blurted, her eyes widening in surprise. “Oh, that is quite all right I thought about bringing a tent-” “A tent? Absolutely not. You are saving your people with your work. The least I can do is make sure that you have an actual roof over your head.” I said, stepping closer to her. She bit her lip, as she looked up to me, the confidence from before replaced with sudden shyness.

“Thank you, Eris.”

Eris. That’s what did it. I suddenly felt the thin golden thread pulling me towards her and my breath hitched.

Mate.

Must protect her, must keep her safe.

I found my mate. I took everything in me not to blurt it right out.

“Of course.” I whispered, before I held out my arm to her hoping that she didn’t notice it trembling.

“I’ll bring you there.”

[mintmatcha]

Mint, I need Lady in Waiting reader to find out that Sir Aizawa isn't married, I NEED this (I need to caress his weary face in my hands and watch his eyes slowly close as he cuddles into them, like a cat)

It’s normal for him to notice who comes and goes at these events. The vigilance is ingrained deep in every muscle, so much so that his eyes flicker to the door whenever there’s even a hint of movement.

That’s how he notices you dip out, the tails of your dress following behind.

He also notices that someone else is watching you.

“And then the dragon breathed fire. Did you know dragons could do that, mister?” the princess babbles, “That might only be in stories, though.”

Aizawa can barely mutter out a sound as he watches the other man -a squire, servicing under one of the other knights- excuses himself and heads to through door. He knows something is wrong by the way he moves. There’s too much purpose in his stride, a goal set into his brow and a smirk of his lips. It’s not the smile of a secret lovers meeting– its the sharpness of a predator hunting its prey.

“Mister Aizawa?”

Princess Eri tugs at the fabric of his shirt. The princess is especially young compared to the age of her father, only six as of this summer. Guarding her as been some of the easier years of his life, but also some of the most rewarding.

“I’m sorry,” he says as he stands, “I have to check on something.”

The young girl looks at him with wide eyes. “Will you be back soon? You promised we would dance.”

He ruffles her hair as he spins on his heel. He fears she has become his soft spot. “Before you know it, princess.”

He can’t hear your voice until his halfway down the hall and clear of the din of the banquet hall. It’s hushed, but with none of the polite lacquer you usually apply.

“I said I am retiring for the night,” you hiss.

“Perfect - then we shall head to your room.”

As Aizawa peers around the corner, he catches the blonde man reaching for you and grasping at the hem of your sleeve. You immediately rip yourself away, only for the squire to grap your other hand much more firmly.

“Sir Monoma,” you say, “If I have told you once, I have told you a hundred times. My heart belongs to another and I have no interest in you.”

The squire steps in closer, a laugh on his breath. He’s drunk enough that Aizawa can almost smell it from here. “Everyone sees how you long for the man. If he hasn’t reciprocated by now, you are waiting for nothing. You’re wasting your good years on a fool.”

Pity pangs in Aizawa’s chest. Have your affections been this obvious the whole time? He’d only just began to notice your lingering glances and hesitant touches– how long had it been obvious to everyone else? How much time had he spent missing you?

“Just one chance.” The squire tugs on your arm, trying to drag you in, but you hold firm, “I’ll treat you real nice, I swear it.”

The man twists slightly and you yelp.

Aizawa moves without thinking. It’s easy to catch a drunk man off guard. He slides in and knocks his weight off center, and in the instant of surprise, his hard snatches the squires away from yours. With a twist and a pop, the man’s arm folds behind his back and he falls to his knees, a strangled sound in his lips. It’s after, when he sees the fear in your eyes, that the anger sets in.

“If I am ever to catch you touching a maiden again I will break this arm so badly that you will never use it again, do you understand?” The words rip from his throat, “Do I make myself clear?”

“Yes, sir, or course, sir,” the man spits out.

“Your charge will hear of this.” With a shove, Aizawa sends him stumbling back, “And the king. Now, be off.”

There’s a moment of hesitation.

“I said be off.”

Monoma scrambles down the hall, back towards the party. You watch, rubbing your twisted skin with a dour look and avoiding Aizawa’s gaze. He’s not one to get flustered, but suddenly he is; you smell like juniper and flowers, a summer’s day, and rolled in like a winter’s storm.

“Don’t worry. His wrist is only sprained,” he offers.

“Frankly, I think you should have broken it.”

That surprises him enough that he chuckles.

“Was that too harsh?” you ask.

“Not at all.”

“Thank you, Sir, I don’t know how to repay you-”

Aizawa had discussed moments like these, the little openings that life gives him and he keeps squandering. Hizashi always tells him to be bold and romantic, Toshinori says to be soft and himself. Both seem like bad choices- so Aizawa decides to so something different entirely.

“Give me your hand.” He holds his own out, palm up. “That is all I request.”

You check the hall with a fair amount of apprehension. “Would your wife approve?”

“I am not married.”

“You aren’t?”

“Not even close to it.” He want s to explain the mix up, but the only thing he can focus on are you hands and how they wring your dress, “You can deny me. I’d understand.”

You lift your hand and place it in his, hovering slightly above his touch. Gently, he raises it to his lips and gives it the chastest of kisses. He expects you to pull away, maybe even slap him, but you don’t. Your touch lingers, warm against his skin.

“Are you sure you are unmarried?” you whisper, “You’ll break my heart if you are lying.”

He turns your wrist and presses a firmer kiss into your pulsepoint, then another, and another, trailing up your arm.

“You can ask the king himself.”

Right before he can nestle his face into the crook of your neck, you break away.

“Then, I will,” you say, dipping away and back towards the grand hall, “I will ask right now. I don’t want you to make a dishonest woman of me, sir.”

“Don’t ask in front of the court!” Aizawa is quick to follow, a uncharacteristic blush blossoming across his cheeks.

“Because you’ll be shown to be a liar?”

“Because the king might end up begging you to take me.”

[nevermorefanfics]

Burning Hearts pt 2

Moodboard Pt.1 Pt.2 Pt.3 Pt.4

Pairing: Eris x Reader, Earlier Azriel x reader

Summary: You arrive at the Autumn court and things are no longer what it used to be and without either your brother or Azriel in the way you and Eris start to catch feelings for each other.

Warnings ⚠️: A little agains, Mentions about sex, Alcohol, fluff, Mean!Azriel, mean!Rhysand, Swearing, mentions about cheating.

Word count: 1549

AN: Firstly I want to thank everyone who has supported me. I love you guys and I am ao thankful for everyone who's liked, followed or reshared. I'm sorry that it took such long time for me to finish this but I've had a lot going on. Hope you like the fic! Love/The cowinblack.

You arrived at the autumn court, feeling nauseous after the past events of the day. Azriel, the mate you’d loved ever since you met him so long ago, wasn't yours anymore. Looking up, Eris was already by your side, concern in his eyes.

“What happened, love?” He calmly asked.

“Azriel… Elain'' That was the only words that came out of your mouth, tears streaming down your face. But Eris didn't need anything else, he understood. You had told him about your concerns with Azriel and Elain earlier. Eris pulled you into a hug and you just stood there crying out for what felt like an eternity until the world became dark and you fell into a long dreamless sleep.

__________________________________

It had gone weeks since you got to the autumn court and you and Eris were closer than ever. Since Beron had been assassinated just months before there was a lot to fix here, laws to remove and things to change. You had helped Eris all you could, even if he said that you should rest and regain your strength. But you’d just laughed it off. Working distracted you and when Eris realized that he’d given you your own office and now you could sit all day working and helping people in need. 

Suddenly you heard a knock on the door and Eris walked in.

“Good afternoon sweetie, care for a stroll in the gardens? I’ve got dinner so we can have a picnic.” He told you. You hadn't really realized that it was already afternoon. Guess time goes faster when you have fun.

“Yeah, sure” Only now realizing how hungry you were.”I'm starving,” you added with a little giggle.

“Good you really should take more breaks from working, otherwise you're going to get wrinkles all over your beautiful face!” Eris joked and you shared a laugh. A laugh, that was the first time since Azriel cheated you’d actually laughed. Adoration shone from Eris' eyes, he really looked like you were his sun, the only thing that mattered to him. 

“Come on, I wanna eat before it gets dark!” You giggled, dragging him out in the fresh air. You and Eris walked around in the gardens for a bit before you got to your usual place, a beautiful orange tree beside a river. As you spread out the blanket Eris took out the stuff that was in his mystery basket. Strawberries, wine, pancakes and even more delicious things that made your mouth water. You sat and ate and talked for a while and when the time had reached midnight the two of you were drunk, like really drunk.

“You look really pretty tonight Y/N” He told you.

“ So do you, handsome.”

As his eyes met yours the both of you leaned forward and your lips met. The kiss wasn't gentle nor sweet, it was passionate, needy. As the kiss deepened something clicked. Maybe you and Azriel were wrong for each other. Because the passion you felt with Eris was something that you never had experienced earlier. 

Carefully Eris laid you down on the blanket.

“Is this okay with you love?” he asked nicely.

“Yes, Eris, yes.” You mumbled into his hair. And so you ended up making love in the fresh autumn air.

__________________________________

The next morning you were woken up by a gentle kiss pressed against your forehead.

“Good morning love, how are you feeling?” Eris asked. 

“Amazing, how do you feel?” You asked with a sleepy voice.

“Better than ever.” He said, now trailing kisses down your neck. “But we have to talk about us.” He continued.

“Of course, Eris I love you, a part of me always has, as you were the one who took care of me all those months ago when we got back from Under the mountain. You were there for me when no one else was, not even my mate. I totally understand if you don't have the same fee-” Eris cut you off with a kiss, a kiss so different from the one you shared before, this was so much more… Real. He wasn't leaving you.

“I love you Y/n, you're my world, I've loved you for so long, always thinking that you didn't see me in that way, we can take it slow if you want, but you’re the one I want by my side, forever.” Eris declared.

“Your little drama queen.” Was the only thing you could get out of your mouth, to shocked by the fact that Eris, the boy you’d had a crush on since you were so very young, was declaring his love before you.

“Well I'm your drama queen.” He laughed pulling you into another kiss.

__________________________________

Months past and you and Eris just grew closer. Your family had made several attempts to see you but you didn't feel ready. They had abandoned you when you needed them the most and you couldn't just forget that. Rhysands had said in a letter that everyone was missing me and that Cassian, Mor and Amren almost had killed Azriel for what he’d done. They were all sorry and just wanted me to come home.But the Night court wasn't your home anymore. Slowly you’d begun to love The Autumn Court and Eris and you had gotten married just days ago. Now you’re Autumn's high lady. It wasn't official. Just the court knew and you wanted to wait before declaring it, or at least make it dramatical. You and Eris had discussed when and where and then the perfect opportunity showed up:

 A High Lord (and lady) meeting was to be held at the Day Court, to discuss the restoration of Prythian. And you were going to be there, but for the first time you weren't going to stand by your brother's side, no you were going to have your own throne next to Eris. If you were going to see Rhys you were going to do it on your own accord. That was when you were going to reveal your title. And that meeting, that meeting was today. Right now you were packing and planning what to talk about, what to wear and how to act. You’d known Helion since you were a little kid and the two of you’d always gotten along. He was like you, hiding all his troubles with humor and you hoped that your friendship would help to stabilize an official, and well needed, alliance between the Day Court and the Autumn court.

“Love, are you ready? We have to get going now!” Eris said as he entered your room, greeting you with a kiss on your cheek.

“Yeah let me just get changed real quick!” You murmured to him.

“Do you need a hand?” He asked playfully. 

“No we don't have much time and I have a feeling that if you help me my dress is probably going off instead of on” You told him and quickly went into your ginormous wardrobe, an adorable chuckle following you. The dress you had chosen to wear was a piece of art. It was a clear beautiful red color which faded out into endless yellows and oranges. The bodice looked to be made of leaves in all of autumn's colors. It was in short just… Ethereal. You quickly got changed and right outside your room you saw the pleasant sight of your husband leaning against the doorframe. He was clad in a stunning tailored suit, a suit that matched your dress perfectly. In his hand he held the tiara version of the crown that covered the top of his head. He sweetly placed it on top of your head and then held out his arm for you to take. You laid your arm on his and a couple moments later you had arrived in Helions favored castle. 

Eris had winnowed the two of you to one of the many entrances where the two of you were greeted by a couple guards. They scienly led you into a ginormous, beautiful room with a glass roof painted in gorgeous golden patterns. Around a round marble table 8 chairs were placed. You quickly realized that the two of you were the first to arrive since the only people in the room, beside the two of you, were Helion and a couple guards. When he saw us he strode towards us with softness in his gaze. 

“Y/N! Long time no see. I heard what happened in the Night court and I became so worried that I wouldn't get to see you here!” He greeted you coming in for a hug. You wrapped your arms around his broad figure as he lifted you up, spinning you in the air.

“Oh and hello to you too Eris, what a fine Lady you have gotten your hands on.” Helion said as he put you down.

Eris answered with a chuckle and then spoke. “Fine indeed. Helion could you be an angel and ask your guards to get another chair. We can't have Autumn's High Lady stand through the whole meeting!” He announced.

“High Lady? Well Y/N I guess congratulations are in order-” Helion abruptly stopped and you knew what just happened. You spun around quickly, Eris clinging to your arm, offering support, as you uttered the words “Hello big brother.”

Taglist:

@queerqueenlynn @se7enteen--black-blog @@mybestfriendmademe @cleverzonkwombatsludge

An: I've got loooots of ideas for the next part and I hope to see you then!

[daydreaming-nerd]

Young Love and Old Money (Cassian x Female! Reader) Part 12

Young Love and Old Money Masterlist

AN: Wow this took longer than I thought because I JUST graduated college, which has been a hard transition for me. Also in one of my grad photos I posed with ACOMAF and Fourth Wing and tagged both Sarah and Rebecca Yarros and REBECCA FUCKING DMed ME AND CONGRATULATED ME! So yeah that was insane.

Summary: She was the most beautiful woman in Prythian, sister to the High Lord of Night, and now she is the soon-to-be wife of Eris Vanserra. Despite her many titles and her aura of unattainability, Cassian can't help but fall deeply in love with the princess of the Night Court. But will it be enough to stop her impending wedding to a man who is sure to destroy her from the inside out?

Warnings: Smut, mating bond being accepted, territorial Cass, angst for Rhys

Word Count: 5,535

“And this is really what you want?” Rhysand asks me for the one-millionth time. 

“Yes brother,” I assure him, taking his hands in mine. 

“No ornate, over the top mating ceremony? No wedding with all seven courts in attendance? Need I remind you that you are the Princess of Velaris, The Jewel of Prythian. I am the High Lord of Night, simply speak it and it is done,” Rhysand fusses. 

I can’t help but laugh at his eagerness to lay the world at the feet of his little sister. He had already given me our mother’s sapphire encrusted diadem as my something blue and had the small temple decorated in faelights and night blooming jasmine. I could practically smell the sweet flowers from the other side of the double oak doors before me. If I peeked through the crack I would see my handsome mate, my cousin, Azriel, and Amren, all waiting for Rhys to walk me down the aisle. 

“Rhys, I already had a larger than life wedding. I want this one to be intimate and sweet, just my family,” I assure him and I see his shoulders relax. 

“I’m sorry that Autumn Court traditions didn’t allow me to walk you down the aisle last time,” he smiles, offering me his arm, which I take. 

“It’s okay that was just the practice wedding,” I tease, bumping into his shoulder. 

Rhys barks out a laugh, a real one, a sound I hadn’t heard from him in a long time. He looks over at me one last time, taking in my appearance before placing a kiss on the top of my head, “You look beautiful sister. Cassian is truly a very lucky male.”  

I smile, smoothing my dress over one last time before the double doors open to reveal the beautiful temple and my mate turns to meet my gaze.

The soft faelights cast a warm glow throughout the temple and the smiling faces of my family meet me as Rhys leads me down the aisle. Mor looks so happy she might squeal, Amren’s face dons a small smile, the biggest one I’ve seen from her, ever. Azriel looks at me for only a moment before turning his head to Cassian, watching his brother's reaction to seeing his future wife and mate.

Cassian was dressed immaculately, in one of the many jackets that he wore to the Autumn Court balls. But I didn’t care much about how he dressed, I was more focused on his eyes, how they glassed over as I walked closer to him. Such happiness and joy that lie in them, like he had been waiting for this day for many years. 

As I step up to him Rhys passes my hand to Cassian’s with a knowing glance. My general looked down upon me like I was the most precious thing he ever beheld. I squeezed his hands tighter to assure him that I was real. 

“You are the most beautiful thing I have ever seen, my love,” Cassian smiled before turning to the priestess. 

I don’t have time to say anything before the priestess begins to speak, seemingly more eager than the rest of us. 

“We gather here today to bear witness to the union of these two beings. If anyone should have any reason why these two shall not be joined please say so at once.” the priestess says. 

“This is also the time when I remind everyone that I have a knife,” Cassian says under his breath, earning a laugh from all of us. 

“Very well,” the priestess giggles. “Do you, y/n, youngest sister of our High Lord Rhysand and Princess of Velaris, take this male to be your lawfully wedded husband? In sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer, as long as you shall live?” she asked me. 

“I do,” I smiled seeing the love pouring from Cassian’s eyes as I slid the simple gold band on his finger. There might have been five other people in the room but I couldn’t care less. Cassian’s hands gave mine a gentle squeeze, his way of showing me how happy he was to hear me say those two little words. 

“And do you, Cassian, General of the Night Courts Armies, take this female to be your lawfully wedded wife? In sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer, as long as you shall live?” the priestess asks, looking at Cassian. He didn’t even notice her. 

“Hell yeah I do,” he laughs, earning a laugh from our family once more as he places his mother’s ring on my hand. 

“Princess if you would,” she said, gesturing to the small blackberry tart on the plate before her. 

When I asked Cassian what he wanted as his official mating offering he didn’t hesitate to ask for a blackberry tart. I was puzzled at first until he explained that we met because of a blackberry tart. The first day he saw me, reading on the couch of the townhouse he and Azriel had come over because my mother had made us all blackberry tarts.  It was after  his story that I realized he had thought about this for a long time.  

I picked up the small pastry off the ornate plate and offered it to Cass. He plucked it from my  hands like it was made of porcelain and took a bite, berry staining his lips. I couldn’t help but reach a  hand up to wipe the mess from his face. 

“Congratulations you two, you are now mates as well as husband and wife,” the priestess smiled fondly, taking a step back.

“C’mere you,” Cassian smirked, pulling me into a kiss. 

His mouth melded against mine, and immediately things felt…different. They were deeper, stronger. The bond between us seemed to glow even brighter.  I felt Cassian dip me, in order to kiss me deeper, earning cheers from our family, especially Mor. When we came up for air I felt like my skin was on fire, the need to touch and feel all of my mate consuming my very soul. Like all moral code I had was thrown out the window. I barely felt it when we broke apart for air. The only thing bringing me back to reality was Cassian’s hazel eyes darkening. 

“Rhys I’m sorry to say this, but I’m going to go fuck your sister now,” Cassian jested picking me up bridal style and walking back down the aisle. 

The sound of my brother’s protest and the family’s laughter followed us as we launched skyward the cold night air whipping my dress around. The stars seemed brighter tonight as we flew over the Sidra, making a beeline for the House of Wind. It wasn’t uncommon for mating ceremonies to end so abruptly, but most of the time the couple would give their thanks to all in attendance before caving to the frenzy. Then again since when were Cassian and I a normal couple?

We landed on the terrace of the House of Wind and the second we were on solid ground Cassian kissed me, not even stopping to put me down. 

“Cass put me down!” I laughed between kisses. 

“Over my dead body, we're going straight to our room,” he smiled storming off towards the door. 

That’s right, our room. I had moved all my things into his room just yesterday. Thankfully he didn’t have much of a wardrobe so my thousands of dresses fit perfectly. 

The house thankfully opened our bedroom door for us, but it closed promptly with a slam as Cassian’s foot kicked it shut. I felt my feet finally touch the ground as greedy hands roamed my waist. 

“You are truly the most beautiful bride, I am so lucky to have you,” Cassian beamed, taking in every inch of me. 

“I’m far luckier to call you my mate and my husband,” I hum, kissing him again as I begin ripping the buttons of his shirt open. 

“That’s right you’re my wife now,” he exclaimed, kissing me deeply. “I’ve waited so long to call you my wife y/n, you have no idea.” 

I felt his hands wander to the buttons of my dress, he fumbled with a few before the thing was ripped in two, buttons ricocheting off every wall and surface in the room. I gasped as the cold air hit my bareback.  I took a step back to reveal my surprise for my husband, one Mor insisted I needed tonight. 

As the intricate wedding dress pooled at my feet my white lingerie was revealed. I remembered when Mor took me shopping at her favorite shop, she claimed it was nonnegotiable, and as Casssian’s eyes nearly popped out of his head I could see why. 

“Fucking hell,” he moaned closing the distance between us by grabbing me by my waist. “Pinch me baby there’s no way you’re my wife,” he said, wandering his hands up and down my body setting my skin on fire. 

“Why don’t you get on your knees Cass,” I whisper in his ear, knowing his second surprise is waiting for him there. 

My general, and the Lord of Bloodshed, falls to his knees before me without even a protest. His eyes fell directly on the garter I was wearing on my thigh. Seemingly plain and white, but I smirked as his eyes widened once again as he saw the customization on it.  

Embroidered on the garther in red thread, read one name. 

‘Cassian’

“You’re going to kill me princess,” he groaned, pressing his head against my thigh.

I couldn’t help  but laugh at his reaction to the fabric around my thigh as I ran a hand through his hair, “So it’s safe to say you like it?” I ask.

“Like it? I fucking love it baby. I’m fucking you with this one tonight.” He smirks leaving open mouthed kisses on my thigh. 

“Damn it that thing is scratchy,” I giggle. I wasn’t lying, the lace had been rubbing against my leg all day. 

“Then allow me to take it off for you,” he said, pressing a kiss just above the lace. “Can’t have anything marring my princess’ perfect skin,” he smirked before grabbing the fabric with his teeth and pulling it down my leg. 

The sight of his dark eyes locking on mine as the lace slid off my leg was enough to have my knees buckle. Thankfully his hands on my hips kept me stable as the garter slid off my foot. He chucked the thing clear across the room before standing and picking me up in one fell swoop.  

I couldn’t help but giggle as he laid me ever so gently on our shared bed. Staring down at me, taking in every single inch of me. 

“My beautiful, beautiful mate,” he breathed, leaning over me to press a kiss to my lips before trailing his mouth down my neck. “Beautiful, exquisite, and all fucking mine,” he groaned accentuating each word with a kiss.  

“Cassian,” I breathed, feeling his mouth traveling to where I needed him most. “I need you now,” I pleaded. 

“Shhh not yet wife, I want to taste you first,” he grinned placing a kiss atop my clothed core before sliding the white lace down my legs and discarding it with the garter. 

A series of kisses lined my core before he parted my folds, licking a long stripe up the center of me flicking his tongue at my clit causing me to arch my back off the mattress. He took his time, swirling and suckling on every part of me. When his fingers slid into me slowly but surely it had me crying out in pleasure. 

I  looked down to where my husband feasted on me, his eyes staring directly into mine. He watched my every reaction to his tongue and his hands as he brought me closer and closer to the gods themselves. Those hazel eyes turned dark brown as they devoured every gasp of pleasure I let out.

“Cass I’m going to-” 

“Cum baby, I want my wife to cum all over my fucking face,” he growled thrusting his fingers into me faster. The change in his voice was so drastic, so deep it had me doing just that.   

I knew the fae were more primal, more needy during their mating but I had no clue it would be like this, no clue I would love it as much as I did. As I came down from my high I realized how badly I needed him unleashed, needed all him. 

“Fuck you taste so fucking good mate,” he groaned licking up whatever juices I left over. 

“Cass I need you,” I said with a guttural sound that didn’t even sound like me.

His eyes snapped up from my cunt to me, somehow even darker than they were moments ago. He crawled up my body, a look in his eyes that could only be described as pure male pride as he said with a smirk.

“Yeah wife? You need me?” he grinned, placing open mouthed kisses over my collarbones. 

“Yes Cass, I need you. I need all of you,” I pleaded, my nails raking down his now bareback. When his shirt had come off? I didn’t know. 

“I’m not myself right now y/n,” he gritted, trying to show restraint. “I’ve never needed you as badly as I do now.” 

“Take me Cass, I want you unleashed,” I begged, pulling him closer to me, just needing to feel his skin brush against mine. 

His pants were quickly discarded to wherever my clothes had gone and I felt his hard cock brush against my stomach. I found myself subconsciously bucking into it like my body was forcing me to. He thrusted inside me in one motion filling me to the brim and causing us both to let out unnatural sounds. 

“Ah oh god’s Cassian, it feels so good!” I cried, finally feeling the relief of having him inside me. 

The only response I got from Cassian I got was a low growl as he started rutting inside of me. The sensation was almost too much to take. I knew that once the mating bond was accepted sex was  different. There was nothing in the world that could compare. It was part of what made the mating bond so special. 

As I felt Cassian thrusting into me, and heard his moans of pleasure as my walls clenched around him I wondered if I would ever get enough of this. If I would ever be truly satisfied. No wonder they called it the frenzy, I could sleep with him inside me and I would still need more.

“Holy fuck baby you feel so good,” Cassian grunted, his face tightening in the process. 

“Cassian!” I screamed, unable to remember anything but the name of my mate. 

“Who’s fuckin pussy is this?” he roared, setting a brutal pace. 

“Yours Cass,” I cried, feeling myself falling over the edge at  his words. 

My orgasm ripped through me like a tidal wave, the pleasure branding my every nerve as I felt the aftershocks all over my body. I had never felt this way before.

“Fuckkk,” Cass moaned, sitting himself inside of me as I felt his load coat my walls. 

He collapsed beside me cradling me to his chest, both of us sweating and breathing heavily. My legs trembled from the aftershock of my release. 

“Shit princess, are you okay? Did I hurt you?” Cassian asked, tilting my chin up so he could assess my face. 

“No, no I’m fine,” I assured him before collapsing on his chest again. 

“I’m sorry I got a little rough there, it was-” 

“The bond,” I said, finishing his sentence. “Don’t worry I feel it too.” 

The heat returned to that spot between my legs and suddenly I needed to be closer to him, even though I was lying on top of him. I lifted my head to press kisses to his bare chest, my favorite activity to do. 

“Y/n if you don’t stop I’m gonna-” 

“I need you Cassian,” I said, cutting him off again with another kiss to his pec. 

His eyes lit up in amusement as he placed my hips over his already hard cock. I started grinding on him like my body was on autopilot. 

“Who am I to deny a princess?” he smirked, pressing a kiss to my lips. 

“We might be here a while,” I breathed, grasping his hair to pull him closer. 

“I can live with that,” he smiled.  

Cassian’s POV:

As expected the mating frenzy lasted about two weeks. Hell it would’ve been longer had Rhys not sent Azriel to break up the love fest. Apparently, there was still work to be done and my presence was needed at Windhaven. Devlon had been slacking in recruiting new troops, and with a war looming, and no Autumn Court soldiers to aid us, that wasn’t going to fly. 

Thankfully with a few ass kickings, Devlon finally got his shit in gear, and more Illyrians were being recruited and trained. Every day I flew up to impart my wisdom and of course make an example of a few of the older soldiers who thought they were ready for battle. 

The days were long, but it only made coming home to my mate all the more sweeter. I used to come home to an empty bed and a glass of whiskey, maybe even a female if I was lucky. At least I used to think I was lucky back then. Nothing compared to seeing y/n’s smiling face as I walked through the door every day.

 Sometimes she would be reading a book and I could sneak up on her and kiss her on the cheek.  Other times she would sneak up on me and wrap her arms around me before telling me I was stinky and needed a bath, a bath she always happily joined me in. One that was more fucking than it was washing. 

“Princess, are you almost ready?” I asked her, knocking on the bathroom door once again.  

With things in the camps finally starting to run according to schedule I finally had time to train y/n as she had asked me to. I couldn’t believe that she thought I wouldn’t want to. I had never been more proud of her for wanting to give herself that freedom, that peace of mind to know that she could defend herself if need be. I was grateful to be the one to help her. So grateful in fact that I went out and bought her some Illyrian training leathers.

She nearly squealed at the sight of them, but the second she touched them her face contorted. She told me that she was scared to wear them because even though she was half Illyrian she didn’t have wings. To which I explained to her that if anyone dared say a word about it they would find their head on a pike. Not that I thought anyone in Windhaven would dare insult their general’s mate. 

“Yeah I think so, are they always this tight?” she asked, throwing open the bathroom door. 

I had seen my mate in lavish dresses, wedding dresses, lingerie, and nothing at all, but seeing her in Illyrian fighting leathers? It was going to be a lot harder to keep my focus than I thought.

“Cass?” she chimed, snapping her fingers to get my attention. 

“Oh- um,” I stumbled. “Yes they are, they create less drag when flying and they keep your opponents from having something to grab onto,” I explain to her, unable to keep my eyes from wandering over her body.

“I suppose that makes sense,” she said, turning to look at herself in the mirror one last time. “I’m ready to go then.”  

We made our way to a terrace giving Azriel a wave as we took flight. It might’ve been faster to winnow to Windhaven, but I didn’t mind flying with y/n in my arms one bit. Not when I spent days thinking I never would again. Not when this relationship between us was so new. I still felt like it would be ripped away from me at any given moment, Cauldron knew everything else in my life had been. 

The weather in Velaris was beginning to warm up as spring was approaching, but in the Illyrian mountains there was still snow on the ground. As we neared Windhaven I felt y/n shiver and instinctively pulled her closer to me. I hadn’t told Devlon that we were coming to use the sparring ring and the practice grounds. I didn’t need to, I was the general, and more importantly y/n was their princess. Granted a princess they had never seen before, but still their superior nonetheless. 

Confused faces graced every man woman and child as I touched down at the edge of camp with y/n. They had all of course heard stories of y/n, maybe even seen paintings of her, but they had never once seen her in the flesh. Even though news traveled slowly here it wasn’t hard to guess who she was, not with all the stories of her beauty. I remembered Eris recounting one…

“Eyes like a storm, skin soft as rose petals and hair like threads of silk. The Jewel of Prythian and the weakness of every male…”

As we walked through the camp I understood why y/n hated large crowds so much. I remember she once told me that walking through a ballroom felt like being a painting put on display. As we walked hand in hand I noticed that every pair of eyes that found her also found me, which set me on edge. I looked down to see her blissfully unaware like she was completely unbothered by their stares. Still, I would keep on my toes. 

We approached a rogue training ring near the edge of the camp, and I felt y/n’s body language lighten as she ran over to a rack of wooden weapons picking up a sword. The look on her face was so enthusiastic I couldn’t help but smile at her. 

“You’re not quite ready for that one,” I laughed watching her swing the sword around like a toy. 

“Are you kidding me? Does this look ‘not ready’ to you?” She challenged, pointing the sword at me.

I cocked an eyebrow at the dull wood pointing at my chest. In one movement I grasped the end of the practice sword in one hand and pushed her down with the other. She fell to the mat with a thud, looking up at me like a toddler. 

“Hey!” she protested dusting herself off as I put the fake weapon back with the rest. 

“You asked me to treat you the same as I would any of my troops. Are you taking that statement back?” I challenged her. 

“No I just didn’t know you were going to push me,” she huffed. 

“Oh, I’m gonna do a lot more than just push you, princess,” I laughed ruffling her hair which was in a simple braid. “If you want to wield a sword you have to be strong enough for it. Which means we're going to be working on those muscles first.” 

“Okay let's do it!” she exclaimed. “Where do we start?” 

“You, start by giving me three laps around camp to get warmed up,” I said sitting on a nearby rock. 

“You’re not joining me?” she asked, crossing her arms. 

“And miss the view of you running away in those pants? Not a chance princess.” I smirked, getting comfortable where I sat. 

To my surprise, there were no further protests as she collected herself and began running around the camp. I was right about the view of my mate running in those tight Illyrian leathers, it would be a miracle if I let those things get home in one piece. 

Y/n ‘s first lap around the camp was a quick one, I forgot to tell her that it wasn’t about getting the laps done quickly, it was about warming up. I supposed that learning from one’s mistakes was the best way to learn though. Once she got through her second lap she had slowed down and by the time she came back to the mat her breaths were ragged. 

“By the cauldron how do you do that?” she asked out of breath. 

“That was three-quarters of a mile princess, my warm-up is five miles,” I laugh standing from the rock. 

Her eyes nearly pop out of her head at my words. She straightens up trying her best to control her breaths. 

“Now drop and give me twenty push-ups,” I said pointing to the mat. Y/n raised her eyebrows and started doing her pushups as asked. 

It wasn’t until a few moments later that I became acutely aware of the presence around us. Without turning my body from where my mate did her exercises, I lifted my gaze to find women and soldiers alike staring at y/n. I tried to act as if I didn’t see them there, turning my attention to my wife once more where she stood, wiping the sweat from her brow. 

“Good now let’s try something else,” I said, walking over towards the rack of weapons and grabbing weighted gloves. “Put these on and let's see how you’re able to swing.” 

I watched as she tied the gloves on and tried to hide my smile as the things flopped around her small hands. I could get her custom ones made later but for now, these would do. She put her hands up like she was ready to fight me and I helped her adjust her position to one that she might actually use.

“Alright now I’m going to hold out my hands and you’re going to punch in sequence, right, right, left, right. Do that over and over again.” I instruct her to hold up my bare hands. 

“Aren’t I going to hurt you though?” she asked, peering from behind her gloves. 

“One day you will,” I laughed. “But I promise I can handle a beginner. Now come on, lay a couple on me.”  

She cocked her head to the side as if she was still questioning my toughness, which was a slight bruise to my ego. Once she did the sequence a couple of times and I didn’t so much as flinch I could feel pride floating down the bond. Like she was proud to have me as a mate. 

My thoughts were interrupted as the interlopers aside us continued to ogle and whisper about us. Their numbers having doubled since the last time I looked. Y/n was completely focused on the series of punches, muttering the order under her breath. I couldn’t help but try and listen in on two females standing by us.

“Is that the princess?” 

“Why would the princess be here with the general?” 

“I’m not sure but she looks like a painting of y/n that I’ve seen before.” 

Y/n continued her exercises until I stopped her, as I wanted to try out a different sequence. I corrected her stance once more and made sure she was holding her fists properly before she picked up on the new pattern. My eyes flitted to a group of three or four soldiers looking at us and listened to their exchange.  

“Who the hell is that with the general?” 

“I think it’s the princess.”

“That’s not the princess you idiot, why would she be here? Rhysand keeps her locked up tight.” 

“Well, whoever she is I’m definitely taking a piece of her before I go home,” 

The male who made the final comment flared his wings as if to try and get y/n’s attention. 

I dropped my hands feeling a few of y/n’s lingering punches bounce off my chest before she realized what was happening. 

“Hey I was doing good!” she protested, attempting to raise her weighed down hands in the air. 

“Yeah that’s enough training for today,” I said tightly before sweeping her up in my arms and taking off into the air. Weighted gloves and all. 

“Cass!” she shouted over the winds. “What was that about? We just started!” 

“The whole camp was eye fucking you, we can train at home. I’ll bring some weights and equipment tomorrow,” I grumbled remembering the male's greedy eyes. 

“You territorial Illyrian prick!” she laughed, smacking me on the chest.

“Hey cut me some slack! The mating bond is still fresh!,” I laughed and the second I said it I saw  the understanding fill her eyes. 

“You’re lucky you’re so handsome,” she sighed leaning her head on my shoulder. 

I gave a small chuckle as we continued the short flight home. Training could start up again once we arrived at the townhouse. It would be easier to train her in private and more fun for when things got a little…well…heated.

y/n’s pov: 

Today marked a day I had hoped would never come. Feyre’s wedding.

When I told my brother of the planned event he said that he was well aware of his mate's upcoming nuptials. I begged and pleaded with him to call in his bargain with her just once, just to give the female a chance to get to know him, but he refused. Even Cassian told him of the pain he felt when I married Eris.  But Rhys was steadfast in letting Feyre be happy, and in the end, I let him do it, for every time I spoke her name there was a sadness in his eyes I couldn't stand to see. 

“Hey,” I said quietly, stepping onto the balcony of the townhouse where Rhys stood. 

Cassian sat dutifully inside waiting for his brother with a glass of whiskey. It was going to be a long night, and he had offered himself up as Rhys’ drinking buddy, an offer my brother happily took. I just wanted to speak to my brother once before Azriel took me home. 

“Hey sis,” Rhys said, looking worse for wear. 

As usual, his image was perfect. A perfectly tailored suit, hair set in place, a clean shave. But his eyes held all the sorrows of the world. Grief I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy. I realized that this is exactly how Cassian felt the day I married Eris, and in that moment my heart broke twice. 

“Cassian’s inside with a couple of bottles of whiskey,” I gave him a half hearted smile wrapping an arm around him. 

“That was nice of him,” Rhys grinned weakly, tugging me closer to him. 

“Don’t give him too much credit he stole it from your liquor cabinet,” I laughed looking up toward my brother. I barely recognized him in this state. 

“Why am I not surprised,” he said, turning toward me. “Do you and Mor have everything you need for girls' night? You have enough wine and snacks right?” 

“Rhys,” I said, squeezing his hands. “You don’t always have to be so brave, you know? It’s okay to grieve. Especially with me, we promised no more walls, no more secrets.” 

I saw his violet eyes begin to glass over as he took in my words. In a way I was happy he felt he could be vulnerable with me again, that he didn’t have to wear the mask with me. However, I was sad that these were the circumstances. 

His arms pulled me into a tight hug and I felt his body shake ever so slightly, either in relief or in sadness. As I felt a drop on my bare shoulder I knew it was the latter and it killed me inside. 

“I’m going to lose her forever. She’s my mate and I’ll never even get to hold her.” he cried, his voice breaking. 

“Rhys I’m-” 

“I’ll have to sit here and watch her love him for the rest of my life,” he breathed. 

All I could do was hold him closer as I felt him breaking in my arms. The misery he felt echoed throughout the Illyrian mountains, and I wondered if today would be the day they finally crumbled. Before I could even try to console my brother he straightened, releasing me from his grasp and staring into the air behind me. 

“What? What is it?” I asked, grasping his shoulders.

“I-It’s her. It’s Feyre.” he stumbled as if coming to a shocking realization. 

“What’s wrong, is she hurt?” I panicked, willing to follow him anywhere to ensure her safety. The female wasn’t just my brother's mate, she had saved him from under the mountain, saved all of us, and saved me. I owed her my life.

“She wants to stop the wedding, she’s begging for someone to help- anyone to help.” Rhys rambled looking around him as if he was looking for some sort of sign. 

“Rhys… RHYS!” I shouted finally getting his attention. “Go get her,” I pleaded with him. 

Before I could get another word in he disappeared into a cloud of shadows, no doubt going to the Spring Court. Going to his mate.

To be continued…

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[daycourtofficial]

if i order a flat white will you sprinkle in some rhys bashing? (barista’s choice for the rest lol)

toffee = loa??

steamed milk = beron?

Okay I took full liberties with this. This has been a headcanon for a long time in my head 🫡

Order your own coffee for Gingerfucker Week here ❤️

“And where does Eris think you are?”

“He doesn’t micromanage me, Azriel.”

“Forgive me.” He raised his hands in defense as you looked to the sky, tracking where the sun was.

“I can’t linger long, his meeting should be done soon.”

“You’re worried he’ll catch my scent on you.”

“It’s not your scent I’m worried about.”

“Does he not know your dirty little secret?”

“I always thought this was our thing. No one has to know.”

The cigarette was poised between your long fingers, pushing smoke from your lips. It was a secret the two of you had had for centuries. Rhysand had little tolerance for the smell and Cassian had stopped smoking when he began obsessively watching what he consumed. It left you and Azriel to continue the habit - an accidental secret that the two of you enjoyed.

Once a month you’d get together, smoke a little, and complain about the family. It was a great way to blow off steam, a tradition that continued even after moving to Autumn.

“I don’t want to talk about my mate. I want to talk about the asshole.” You held up a hand, stopping Azriel’s mouth from opening wider. “Yes, my mate is an asshole, but he’s my asshole. I want to talk about yours.”

Azriel snatched the cigarette from your fingers, taking a long drag himself. “He’s not mine. If anything I’ve been putting distance between us.”

Being in the middle was exhausting. Juggling the grievances of all his family members during this time left Azriel at his wit’s end. Mor wanted to complain about Eris, Cassian was upset at the secrets kept from him, Nesta was upset she didn’t get juicy gossip.

It was running him ragged.

You pulled the cigarette back, the filter lighting as you breathed in the smoke. Azriel had never mentioned the letters you had asked for him to drop off, content not to know how they were received for the time being.

“Shouldn’t be too hard. His head is so big it’s practically in another court. He’s practically in a long distance relationship with his body.” You giggled at the mental image and Azriel cracked a smile.

“It’s hard without you around.”

“It wouldn’t be if my brother was a reasonable person.”

“He’s not the only one you hurt.”

You had already apologized to Azriel a thousand times, each one a dress run for apologizing to the rest of the family. The two of you were moving on, but the rest of the family was lagging behind.

“I know. But I could fix things if he didn’t suck and prohibit me from stepping foot in Night.” You paused before huffing. “He should be called High Lord of the Fart Court.”

Azriel took the cigarette from your fingers, giving you a look. “You can do better. You’re High Lady of Autumn, surely you can come up with better insults than that.”

“I am not High Lady of Autumn.”

Azriel didn’t respond, offering you a quirked eyebrow, waiting for you to continue. You sighed before filling the silence. “It’s complicated. I don’t know Autumn, Autumn doesn’t know me. Things are a bit shakey since Beron’s death. Nothing serious. But I worry too much change too soon will be bad.”

“Are these your words or your new High Lord’s?”

“Mine.” You sighed, slumping against the tree. “It was quite a scandal when Eris killed Beron and announced our mating. Even moreso now that Marigold splits her time between Autumn and Day.

“Rhys did a damn good job convincing Prythian that the Night Court is full of demons and monsters. They won’t trust me if I just barrel my way to the top.

“For now, I am Lady of Autumn. Eris hates it, but I don’t feel right ruling people who don’t know me.”

The woods were quiet around the two of you.

“I just wish he got it, Az.”

“It’s Eris.”

“And? He’s an asshole for banning me from my family.”

“He just doesn’t understand.” Azriel was the most understanding of the family. You wondered what lengths he would go to defy Rhys for a mate of his own.

“Rhys has never understood how suffocating his shadow can be.”

“Maybe not.” One of Azriel’s shadows swirled around the cigarette, extinguishing the flame. “Maybe one day you’ll get to tell him.”