wowlookwhosspirallingagain

[wowlookwhosspirallingagain]

stop i’m gonna sob this is SO important

I wish people would stop saying “It’s July. Well done for wasting half a year.” Did you make someone smile in the past six months? Did you stroke a cat or throw a stick for a dog? Did you learn a new fact or teach someone a new joke? Did you laugh, cry, scream or sing in the past six months? Because if so, congratulations for not wasting your time at all.

[wowlookwhosspirallingagain]

do i just.. go on..? continue surviving? maybe even start truly living? there should be someone watching me, making sure i’m okay, leading me through life. how do i keep going when all i want to do is constantly look for someone older to take care of me?

[wowlookwhosspirallingagain]

oh fuck me with a chainsaw why dont you

the “i wanna go home” never leaves my head even when i’m physically sitting in my bed

[wowlookwhosspirallingagain]

i hope that guilt fucking eats you alive and you NEVER move on and feel good about yourself. feel it. be uncomfortable, be aware of the pain you caused me.

[wowlookwhosspirallingagain]

so true lmao

growing up is terrifying i wasn’t supposed to make it this far and now my future depends on me and i have to make wise choices and decisions and i’m just sitting here like a clueless little kid

[wowlookwhosspirallingagain]

„everything happens for a reason” what could, possibly, be the reason for all of that

[wowlookwhosspirallingagain]

i <3 day drinking like u r saying i can do this all day? everyday? i’m sooo in

[wowlookwhosspirallingagain]

trying to heal & wanting to get as worse as possible at the same time is so silly because it feels like there are so many sides of me constantly fighting with each other

[wowlookwhosspirallingagain]

oh honey i get you :( but i’m so glad you’re here !!! we will make it <3

i don’t want to live like this. i only exist at this point. all i do is distract my mind so i don’t kill myself

[wowlookwhosspirallingagain]

growing up is terrifying i wasn’t supposed to make it this far and now my future depends on me and i have to make wise choices and decisions and i’m just sitting here like a clueless little kid

[wowlookwhosspirallingagain]

i dunno if like- this is the right move but i was wondering if you had any ideas on how to go abt getting a bpd diagnosis? i meet all the criteria but im also under 18 atm. ive done insane amounts of research and i know these arent just teenage mood swings and this isnt normal. i have that feeling of knowing something really bad happened when i was little but i cant quite reach it, i cant even remember my childhood. i even have the stupid hallucinations, the shadow people, bugs crawling, hearing my name being called. i know somethings *wrong* and i feel so messed up and like i cant do anything but hurt others and push them away. Sorry im rambling youre welcome to just dismiss this ask but if you dont thanks for reading <3

- Scared Anon

hi!! i’m so glad you reached out to me, i always try to help people when i can so here’s a bit of my story:

i don’t know how it works in your country but in mine you cannot get diagnosed with bpd (or any personality disorder) if you’re under 18 BUT you can get diagnosed with a personality which is developing forwards borderline (i think this is the closest translation to the original name) and this is exactly what i got diagnosed with when i was 16. it does basically.. nothing? didn’t really help with anything. however i found a good therapist and she’s been really helpful, she’s mixing schema therapy with dbt and cbt so it works for me as a fellow bpder. from what you described you definitely do fit the criteria so what you need to do is schedule an appointment with a psychiatrist and tell them the exact thing you wrote here:) they’re here to help you! i really hope you get the support you need. please feel free to text me anytime you need<3

[wowlookwhosspirallingagain]

i hate feeling things so deeply and i hate that they get physical like bitch you’re an EMOTION stay in your lane why does my body hurt

[wowlookwhosspirallingagain]

i hate being cursed with this fucking disorder i had an awful breakdown and wanted to slit my wrists 5 minutes ago and now i’m dancing to club classics by charli xcx and feeling like i’m on top of the world

[wowlookwhosspirallingagain]

and you can aim for my heart, go for blood

but you would still miss me in.your.bones.

the “i wanna go home” never leaves my head even when i’m physically sitting in my bed

[wowlookwhosspirallingagain]

i’m just so fucking tired i don’t think sleeping for 20 days straight would help i need to die

[wowlookwhosspirallingagain]

awh thank you so much!

What are some good bpd accounts like yours you like? Like some other super relatable thoughts you appreciate. Give a so

I don’t love picking favorites because there are so many incredible accounts out there, and I’d hate to exclude anyone. The BPD community is filled with so many voices that resonate in unique and painfully beautiful ways- it’s impossible to capture them all.

That said, here are a few that hit me hard and often feel like they’ve cracked my skull open to write what’s in there: @wowlookwhosspirallingagain @thisfileiscorrupted @obscurix cannot get this one to hyperlink :( @tired-of-everything

But honestly? I think the best accounts are the ones that make you feel seen, whether they’re loud and raw, soft and reflective, or some messy mix of both. We all have our own version of this chaos, and it’s all valid

[wowlookwhosspirallingagain]

the “i wanna go home” never leaves my head even when i’m physically sitting in my bed