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The Justice League is definitely jealous of the early years Titans when they find out their meetings include Agent A cookies, state of the art and Batman approved tech, friendship bracelets, and a base/meeting room with bean bags. Hal and Barry try and convince Wally to bring them cookies; when he refuses they try to break in their base/tree house and get wrecked by Robin's booby traps as the Titans watch and laugh

Omg yes.

1. They’re jealous of Batman because all their kids think he’s cooler than them

2. They’re jealous when they find out Alfred regularly provides cookies

3. Batman provides them with WAY more gadgets than he gives the JL members

4. Batman is nice to them

Number four really pisses Hal off. Bruce stares at him, totally deadpan, and tells him, “Because they’re kids, Hal. They’re still learning. You, on the other hand, are a grown man. You should know what you’re doing. I have no sympathy for you.”

Hal is flabbergasted, but he’s also now thoroughly embarrassed that he was jealous of Batman being nice to kids.

When Wally snorts at Barry and Hal one day and refuses to bring them Alfred’s cookies, they try sneaking into the treehouse base.

Robin’s boobytraps are quite entertaining to watch in action, and all the Titans are lounging around their surveillance room watching the security feeds. They have freshly made popcorn and still-warm cookies, courtesy of Alfred. It’s a long, entertaining evening of watching the older heroes make fools of themselves.

Batman finds Barry and Hal hanging from a trap later that night and chews them out for trying to disturb the kids during their meeting time. And also for not being able to get through traps made by a literal eleven year old.

Then he goes inside and praises Robin for how well his booby traps worked.

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Team dad bruce.... My dearest in the world

As a mostly good dad!Bruce Wayne enjoyer I am absolutely cackling at the idea of #1-early-days-Titans-supporter Bruce Wayne! The rest of the league thinks he's nuts for trusting a bunch of sidekicks ("they like to be referred to as partners," Bruce reminds them) with large-scale missions. Bruce is 100% the type of hands off yet still a helicopter parent who'd sign up as chaperone/coach/den master just to keep an eye on their kid.

I'm just imagining Bruce (or Alfred if he's busy) driving a mini van or plane (I think it's so much more funnier if it's a regular soccer mom mini van honestly) to drop off the Titans at mission locations. Robin would do it but he's too short to reach the pedals and the rest of the team haven't learned how to drive yet. Meanwhile Bruce is sitting in the car just observing and cheering them on (in his own emotional constipated way lol)

God I love this so much. Especially of Batman is at a weekly JL meeting, telling all the others, “I don’t know why you don’t trust them, they’re performing really well together,” while he sips coffee from his World’s Best OK-est Coach mug (Wally found the cup, Roy crossed out Best and wrote OK-est in sharpie, Dick presented it to him with the utmost seriousness two days ago).

Oliver recognizes Roy’s handwriting and gets so annoyed. Bruce is smirking behind the rim of the mug, taking an obnoxious sip.

When they need to get somewhere for a mission, Batman pilots the Batplane (the Batmobile won’t fit all of them, he’s commissioning a car from Lucius) and as they arrive at the destination he’s just like, “Okay, kids, here we are. Remember: no mercy, no pity. Gouge them in the eyes if you have to. Have fun!” And he circles the area until Robin calls him on comms to let him know they’re ready to be picked up.

They all pile into the plane, still running on adrenaline and super excited. Roy tells him about how he shot a guy in the ass with his arrows before he could get a hit on Wally - he got one in each cheek. Wally snorts and laughs between a retelling of how he tripped six guys at once. Garth excitedly tells him he electrocuted the water in one area and knocked three guys out. Donna and Dick tell him how they tag-teamed a group of ten thugs without getting a scratch.

“Well done, well done! Excellent evening. Who wants pizza and cookies?”

Alfred has a late night snack waiting for them when they get back.

Bruce is the team dad, and he’s not even mad about it. He loves every second of it.

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Little insignificant headcanon that when Dick first started living with Bruce and he was in his sassy unhinged third grader era, Bruce would always give him a lollipop when they went out as Bruce and Dick. At a gala? Dick has a lollipop. To the park? Dick has a lollipop. A Gotham Knights game? Dick has a lollipop. Interview with Vickie Vale? Dick has a lollipop.

Everyone is convinced Dick Grayson just has a lollipop addiction. In reality? Bruce has to give him one so he’s too preoccupied to run his mouth. The few times Dick isn’t given a lollipop or Bruce runs out while they’re still out and about, Dick acts like a feral little brat who makes an interviewer cry, all with a smile on his face as he squeezes Bruce’s hand, giggling. The first gala Bruce brought Dick to, they had to leave early because Dick was a little too sassy with a few Wayne Enterprises partners and a couple women who were trying to flirt with Bruce and shoo Dick away. It was shortly after that when Bruce came up with the lollipop solution.

So most paparazzi pictures of Dick show him with a lollipop of some sort, but it even carries over to when he’s an adult. Did Bruce get him addicted to them? Maybe. Not on purpose. But now, everyone think Dick just has always loved lollipops, and even though he’s currently got one in his mouth and he’s fiddling with the stick, he smirks and explains, “Actually no, Bruce first started giving them to me when I was little to get me to shut up. It’s so sad, really. Children should be seen and not heard, isn’t that what you said, B?”

Bruce is glaring at him. Shit like that is exactly why he needed to keep Dick’s mouth shut in the first place.

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Okay but what about a scenario with the season one yj team, and maybe no one on the team knows who Batman and Robin are behind the mask, not even Wally.

And perhaps the team is getting annoyed that Robin knows all of their identities, but he won’t share his. They don’t care that he tries to explain that it’s not just his identity, it’s Batman’s, so it’s not just him who has to be comfortable with sharing it with them. It doesn’t matter if he explains how paranoid Batman is, how it’s Batman who makes the final call on if Robin can or cannot share his identity. They just blame Robin, calling him a bad teammate, a bad friend.

Kaldur is the only one who doesn’t press him, who assures him that he has no obligation to share his identity with them.

Too bad the rest of the team doesn’t seem to get the memo.

And maybe one weekend, Black Canary has insisted that the team spends the weekend together. It’s a long sleepover, it’s team bonding. It’s so they can actually have a chance to act like kids.

And Robin had been excited. He’d been really looking forward to it, even if Batman did insist that he wear a mask the entire time. It’s more reliable than sunglasses, Batman said. More likely to stay in place. Not easy to remove like the sunglasses are.

Dick had laughed and said that it’s not like anyone would try to take his glasses off, but he complied with Bruce anyway. It did make him feel a little better, knowing the mask would be in place all weekend and he wouldn’t have to worry about slipping up.

But then he fell asleep during a movie. It had been a very long week, what with school and patrol and training leading to some very late nights. He was exhausted, and it was getting late into the night, and the movie was so boring. He fell asleep curled up on the floor between the coffee table and the couch, cocooned in a layer of blankets.

And he woke up to fingers trying to pry his mask off. Training took over, it was pure instinct, because Bruce has drilled into him how important it is to keep his mask on, to not let anyone remove it, even if he’d been kidnapped by a rogue and incapacitated. Anyone touching near his face makes him wake up instantly, and he grabs the hand that was near him and snaps it before backing away.

A pained yelp wakes him up more, reminds him where he is, because it was Wally whose wrist he just broke. It was Wally who was trying to remove his mask.

Dick is breathing heavily and looking around the room, trying to figure out what’s going on. But now he has the others yelling at him, asking him what’s wrong with him, why would he hurt Wally like that, it was just a joke.

“It’s not a joke!” he shouts at them, his voice cracking. “You were gonna take off my mask!”

“Oh come on, boy blunder, it’s not that serious!” Artemis argues.

“Yes, it is!” he gasps. “You can’t just take off my mask! I’ve told you all a million times that I’m not allowed to let you know who I am!”

“It’s not like we’d even recognize you just because we took it off!” M’gann argues.

That’s arguably false, considering Dick Grayson’s face is on the cover of one of the magazines M’gann currently has on the coffee table right that instant.

“That’s not the point!” Dick shouts, but he’s already grabbing his stuff and throwing it all into his bag before he darts to the zeta tubes. He’s hyperventilating and trying very hard not to outright panic when he runs into Kaldur, who looks concerned and confused. He was coming from the direction of the bathrooms, he must not have been in the room when they decided to try and take a peek.

“What’s going on?” Kaldur asks, moving to place a hand on Dick’s shoulder.

Dick flinches away, feeling bad when Kaldur looks sad.

“I’m going home,” Dick tells him, his voice cracking again. “Wally’s wrist is broken.”

“Robin? What happened? Are you alright?” Kaldur tries to ask, but Dick is shaking his head.

“They tried to take off my mask,” Dick whispers, but he’s putting in the code for the Batcave and leaving before Kaldur can say anything else.

Bruce is still hunched in front of the Batcomputer when Dick gets back, and he’s surprised to see him so soon. But he opens his arms when Dick rushes towards him, and he holds him tight and calms him down when he realizes how upset Dick is.

When he finds out that they tried to take off Dick’s mask while he was asleep? He’s livid.

He doesn’t let Robin join the team again for months. Which is fine by Dick, because he doesn’t want to work with them anyway. He misses Kaldur, but Robin and Aqualad find ways to hang out away from Mount Justice, away from the others. Aqualad relays to Robin how poorly the team performs when Robin isn’t there to pick up the slack, how their lack of experience is becoming quite evident when their mission success rate plummets without Robin.

What happens next? Idk. Maybe Dick starts his own team with Donna, Garth, and Roy. Idk.

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I want a season 1 yj fic where no one on the team knows who Batman and Robin are behind the masks. Wally is friends with Robin, but he only knows him as Robin, and he’s never seen him without the mask or without his sunglasses.

And Dick thinks they’re all friends. Sure, they don’t know his name or half of his life, but they know him. He thinks of them as some of his best friends. He doesn’t actually have a whole lot of friends. He has Barbara, but she doesn’t know about Robin. And he has Bette, but she’s his cousin, so she doesn’t really count.

So when he walks into the lounge area in Mount Justice one day and hears most of the team talking shit about Dick Grayson, who was just shown on TV with Bruce Wayne because there was a big charity gala last night, he’s trying so hard not to get upset. Because they’re making fun of him. They’re talking shit about him. They don’t even know Dick Grayson, but they’re saying such mean things about him.

“I’ve seen him around school, he’s such a snob,” Artemis complains. “His hair is always gelled so obnoxiously and his uniform is always perfect, and,” she snorts, “he’s captain of the mathletes. What a dork.”

Alfred insists on his uniform always being perfectly ironed and his shirt being tucked in. He gets the longest lectures whenever he gets a detention or a pink slip for his uniform being out of line.

And Bruce has been doing Dick’s hair before school since Dick started going to school. He’d been so nervous the first time, because he was eight and he’d been homeschooled in the circus and he’d never been to a real school before, so Bruce did Dick’s hair just like his, and it made him feel so much better. Dick does his own hair mostly now that he’s older, but he mostly sticks with how Bruce first showed him. It’s easy. It’s a classic style. It makes him feel a little less nervous.

And who cares if he’s captain of the mathletes? Bruce insists it will look good on college applications. You can never start preparing too early. Plus, Gotham Academy is full of nerds, it’s far from the dorkiest club on campus. He’s mostly only on the team because his math teacher insisted.

He’s lingering in the hallway, just before the doorway to the lounge, leaning against the wall as he listens in on their conversation.

“He’s obviously a publicity stunt,” Wally snorts, and Dick can hear him stuffing chips in his mouth. “Was Bruce Wayne getting bad press when he first adopted him or something? I always thought it was weird he just plucked a kid from out of nowhere.”

“I thought he was from the circus?” Conner asks, but he actually sounds confused, curious.

The question only makes Wally and Artemis laugh louder, and even M’gann is giggling now. Dick feels like his heart just dropped into his stomach.

“The whole thing is so weird,” Artemis laughs. “Bruce Wayne takes him out like he’s some sort of little accessory, it’s so weird.”

“They are a pretty weird pair, aren’t they?” Wally laughs.

“I mean, the kid seems like a pain in the ass,” Artemis says, and Dick can just tell from the way she says it that she’s smirking. “I don’t know if I’d feel that bad if their whole father-son schtick was all for the camera. Brucie probably treats him like a toy he can just put back on the shelf when he’s done playing with him. He’s probably nothing but a charity case.”

Dick can hear someone pushing Artemis into the side of the couch, but he can tell they’re still all laughing and joking around. Dick feels like his breath is caught in his throat.

“That’s a horrible thing to say,” Conner says.

“Oh, come on, Conner,” Artemis huffs. “I’m only kidding.”

“It’s not something to kid about,” Conner says. “He’s a real person. They’re both real people. You know nothing about them.”

“I know that he struts around school like he owns the place!”

“Does he really?” M’gann gasps.

He can hear Artemis, Wally, and M’gann all continuing to gossip together, to laugh about his photos that Artemis is pulling up on her phone. He can hear Conner mutter something about them being childish, and then get up towards the kitchen area.

The hand on his shoulder startles him, and he’s so mad at himself for not hearing Kaldur walking up behind him.

“Robin, is everything alright?” Kaldur asks, and his voice is so gentle, so concerned.

“M’fine,” Dick chokes out. “M’just, I - I’m gonna go, actually. Can’t stay for training today.”

“Are you not feeling well?”

“Just…feeling a little sick. I’ll be fine.”

Conner has since walked into the hallway too, and he’s looking at Dick all concerned now too. But Dick feels like everything is too hot and he can’t breathe right and he’s suddenly so upset, and he can’t stay here anymore knowing that half of his friends are sitting just a few feet away, making fun of him.

Dick rushes back home, and he finds Bruce sitting in his office going over some WE paperwork. Bruce is surprised he’s home so soon, but holds onto Dick tightly when he falls into his lap.

“What’s wrong?” Bruce asks, squeezing Dick tight. “Did something happen at training? Are you hurt?”

“People are mean,” Dick mumbles into Bruce’s shoulder. “They were watching something about the gala from last night. Didn’t wanna stick around.”

“Oh, Dickie,” Bruce sighs, because this isn’t exactly the first time Dick has heard people he thinks are his friends talking about him behind his back, even if this is the first time it’s people who don’t realize they know him talking about him.

“They called me a publicity stunt,” Dick says, pressing himself closer to Bruce. “And a charity case.”

“You aren’t either of those things,” Bruce says, his voice firm, leaving no room for argument. “You’re my son, no matter what anyone else says.”

“I know.”

Bruce sighs again, resting his cheek on top of Dick’s head. They’re both quiet for a moment, Bruce swiveling side to side in the chair a bit.

“I know it’s difficult,” Bruce tells him. “But how about I put these papers away, and we go watch a movie before Alfred has dinner ready?”

“Yeah, okay.”

“Or we can go down to the cave and we can train a bit, if you’d rather do that?”

“I kinda wanna hit something,” Dick mumbles. “But can we watch a movie after dinner?”

“We’ll do whatever you want, chum.”

Dick continues to cling to Bruce while he straightens up his desk, but he hops up and rushes over to the clock to go down to the cave. Black Canary eventually calls the cave to ask Batman if Robin is alright, because she missed him at training and no one could tell her why he left, but he just tells her that Robin wanted to train with him today.

Later that night after dinner, Dick is cuddled up next to Bruce in his favorite family room, a movie playing in the background, and Dick falls asleep like that. Bruce doesn’t disturb him. They both end up falling asleep on the couch, and Bruce decides to take the next day off and to keep Dick home from school so they can spend the day together.

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I want the entire Justice League to just be so fucking scared of Dick!Robin. He’s like 8-10 when they first meet him, but he’s somehow more horrifying than Batman. He’s teeny tiny and a cross between a fluttery little sprite and a shadowy demon. They’re still not sure if Batman is human or not, but they’re all convinced that Robin is some sort of entity. He’s a ghoul, a spirit, an eldritch horror that must haunt Gotham for some Godforsaken reason. And he either picked Batman to latch onto, or Batman saw him and plucked him up and thought he’d make a good companion.

One day, he gets so mad at Green Lantern for poking fun at Batman that he bites him so hard, Hal’s arm bleeds. Batman had grabbed him by his cape and dangled him in the air, telling him to apologize, but Robin just hung there with his arms crossed and a pout on his face. He did eventually say sorry. They all knew he didn’t mean it. He had blood drying on his lips. He didn’t wipe it away. It wasn’t until Batman put him down that the bat even noticed, then used his cape to clean him up.

The next time they saw him, he was giggling and asking Hal if yellow is his greatest weakness, and if his own yellow cape causes Hal pain. Then he leaned forward and whispered, “I hope it does” before giggling again and skipping away to ask Superman something.

Hal didn’t come to the Watchtower for two months after that.

Dick is enamored by Superman. He loves him. Follows after him all the time, is always asking Superman to take him flying. Clark takes him every so often, but cackling laugh Robin lets out while they’re in the air sends a chill down his spine.

Martian Manhunter admits that he once accidentally brushed against Robin’s mind, but all he picked up was distorted circus music.

That freaks everyone out, and now they hear it in their own heads whenever they catch a glimpse of Robin.

When he starts growing like a real boy? Horrible. Creepy. They don’t like it one bit. He’s acting too human, he’s making them think he’s real.

When he starts hanging out with their sidekicks? Nope. They all try to put a stop to it. The sidekicks all disobey them with a roll of their eyes. Then he becomes the leader of their little group, calling themselves the Titans? Oh God, he must be starting some sort of army.

Then a new Robin appears, and they all meet Nightwing, but they have no idea Nightwing used to be Robin. So when Nightwing becomes a member of the JL, they don’t think twice about him. They think Nightwing is a great guy. Very open. Very friendly. They all consider him a good friend.

Then it comes out after a few months that he used to be Robin, and all the original JL members practically squeak and distance themselves from him immediately. They’re terrified of him.

“You’re the little demon that bit me?” Hal shrieks.

Nightwing laughs, but he’s shrugging and looking so sheepish, so embarrassed.

“You were being mean to my dad!”

And the fact that Batman is Nightwing’s dad just makes them all freeze. Because they never actually considered that an option.

They’re still convinced he’s not entirely human, though. It would explain how he’s so flippy and bendy.

Dick has way too much fun when he realizes they actually think he’s not a human. He torments them just a little bit, in retaliation. Bruce watches from afar, both annoyed with his coworkers and amused by his son’s antics.

[meteoriteric]

Here, a continuation for this post. I didn’t know y’all would hate it that much lol! Apologies, apologies m(._.)m

This was my explanation for it incase you wanted to read that

——

When Dick finally found Bruce, Bruce was silently lying on the floor of the cave. The lights were off, his eyes were closed, and Ace was resting his head on top of his Dad’s chest.

Dick padded over softly, feeling like he was nine years old again and didn’t know how to talk to Bruce.

“Dad…?” Dick whispered, it felt wrong to try and speak at a normal level. Bruce let out a soft hum and cracked his eyes open as Duck kneeled down beside him.

“Hi baby…” Bruce croaked, his voice sounding raw and broken. “How are you?”

Dick gave a crooked grin and laid down beside his Dad, melting as Bruce’s hand gently started to run through his hair. “Better than you, it seems… it was a crazy last week, huh?” Dick began, expecting Bruce to tense up and start deflecting.

“Yeah…” Bruce sighed, staring up unblinkingly at the cave ceiling. Ace let out a soft whine and wiggled his wet nose under Bruce’s chin, drawing him out of his thoughts. “I… I’m sorry… Sometimes… sometimes I can’t understand you or your siblings.”

Dick blinked as his heart started racing. “What? What does that mean?”

Bruce let out a huff of air, like he was trying to carefully pick out the words that he wanted to use. “You don’t like it when I coddle you or I’m overbearing, right?” Bruce felt Dick nod against his shoulder. “But… sometimes you do? I just don’t- I don’t understand when I’m supposed to.”

“Last week… I ignored your leg after we got back from patrol. I’m sorry that was wrong of me to do.” Bruce apologized, leaned over and pressing a soft kiss to Dick’s forehead. “Last month, you got mad at me for fussing over a stab wound… so I thought… I thought it was the same? I didn’t want you to yell at me. I didn’t want to have another argument.”

“I was scared that you were hurt and would be mad if I tried to help, so I went… cold. I know it ended up being a light sprain, but… I-I did want to help.” Bruce’s voice hitched, making the back of Dick’s eyes burn with tears. “But… but you were angrier? O-or sadder? I don’t know. I don’t understand, and I know you’re probably not making it difficult on purpose, but it’s so hard.”

If there’s one thing that could make Dick cry in a second, or even less than that, it’s seeing or hearing his Tati start to cry.

Dick turned his head and buried his face in Bruce’s shoulder, silently glad that his Dad decided to wear one of his softer sweaters that could absorb his tears.

“I’m sorry too, Tati. I… I came looking for a fight, and I took unnecessary risks on patrol just to get you riled up so I could let off some steam. I didn’t even have a real reason to be angry with you last week… I just-”

“Some days… I feel like I’m coming out of my skin. And it’s weird, I just, don’t wanna be perceived by others…” Bruce stayed silently, and once again Dick was glad his Dad let him take his time and try and sort out his thoughts. “Your gaze is heavy, it’s always been heavy.”

“…heavy?”

“Mhmm… like… I know you expect great things from me. And I love that you know that I can achieve them. But sometimes-“

“It’s too much, and you feel like your failures are magnified the moment you make one little mistake?”

“Yeah… how did you know that?”

“Alfred… he’s the one who raised me. I guess I took a bit more of his parenting than I thought.” The two stayed silent for a while, Bruce still running his fingers through Dick’s hair while his son absentmindedly scratched Ace behind the ear.

“I’ve never noticed.”

“Good. I’ve never wanted you to. You needed someone in your life that you could turn to other than me, I’m glad it was Alfred.” They lapsed into silence once more.

“I, of all people, know how hard it is to ask for… affection. Maybe… we could have a code word?” Bruce suggested hesitantly. “Just so I know it’s okay to hover. Or maybe one, so I know you actually want to be left alone?”

Dick couldn’t help but smile. “Yeah… we can work it out. Later though, I’m feeling drained from all this… emotional talking.”

“Ha, yes. I completely understand, especially with the way you cried.” Bruce teased lightly, poking Dick on the cheek.

“Wha- you cried first!” Dick protested, a laugh bubbling up as he swatted at his Dad’s hand. “I love you, Tati.” Dick grinned, squeezing Bruce in a hug.

“I love you too Dickie, so much. My little boy has grown up to be so strong and smart.” Bruce smiled softly, pressing another kiss to Dick’s forehead and chuckling at the embarrassed blush on his son’s cheeks.

“You wanna go watch a movie with me? I’ll even let you have the good blanket.” Dick sprang up from the ground, grinning as Ace also stood up and circled around him happily.

“That’s a lie, but yes, any movie you want, Birdie,” Bruce grunted as he stood up, stretching and ignoring the horrified look on his son’s face as his back cracked loudly. “Alright, Ace, you’re relieved of your duty,” Bruce said, patting the German shepherd on the head once as he barked loudly.

“Why was Ace down here in the first place? And what did you mean by duty?” Dick asked as they started walking toward the elevator, both of them not in the mood to take the stairs.

Bruce raised an eyebrow at Dick. “Ace is my service dog? Like how Titus and Alfred the cat are Damian’s?”

Dick blinked. He did not know either of those things. “Wha-“

“We’ll talk about it later. Cmon.”

——

Jason blinked, staring listlessly at the words in his book. That’s how you could tell he’s really out of it; he doesn’t even remember what book he picked out, and he couldn't care less about it.

Jason was suddenly jolted out of his lethargic state by a familiar knock on the door in a pattern only Bruce did.

It was silent for a while, but Jason knew better. If Bruce had come here in person and knocked on his door, most likely as Bruce Wayne, then he wasn’t going to go away any time soon.

“What,” Jason growled as he threw open the door, silently thrown for a loop the moment he looked at his Dad. “… why do you look like that? And why is Ace here?”

Bruce chuckled softly, his eyes crinkling and showing off the crows feet Jason doesn’t remember him having before. Ew, his Dad looked older. That thought was promptly shoved away to be unpacked later in the very far future.

“I’m sorry for bothering you today… I was wondering if I could talk to you?” Bruce asked, ignoring the way Ace poked his thigh with his nose. “It’s alright if it’s a no. I just wanted to… talk.”

Jason shut down the urge to slam the door shut in his face (only for dramatics, he doesn’t wanna hurt his Dad) and nodded, stepping aside so he could let Bruce and Ace through.

As Bruce sat down, Ace let out a whine and pressed his nose against Bruce’s hand. Bruce rolled his eyes before looking at his son sheepishly. “I’m sorry to ask Jason, do you have a snack I could eat? It seems I have forgotten to eat this morning, and Ace is scolding me.”

Jason frowned, worry curling in his gut as he leisurely made his way to his kitchen, pulling out a box of white cheddar popcorn (the best kind) and tossing Bruce a bag. “You’re paying me back for this shit, I'm not made of money like you,” Jason mumbled, totally not worried because the only time Bruce forgets to eat and Alfred hasn’t reminded him is when something is truly wrong.

“So… what?” Jason questioned, refusing to sit down. He knew power plays; he wouldn’t let Bruce have the upper hand in whatever conversation they were about to have.

Bruce popped a few kernels into his mouth, chewed, and really looked at Jason before sighing. “I’m sorry about last week. Dropping you off like that without talking about it was wrong of me. I don’t want you to think that you can’t come home or to the cave anytime that you’d like, it's your home too.” Bruce apologized.

“Seriously? Is that it-“

“However, I’m not sorry for being upset that you used a gun against someone while I was around, knowing full well how I feel about unnecessary gun usage,” Bruce said, cutting Jason off.

“You are my son. I love you. These are facts and will never change, no matter what you do. I don’t like guns, but more importantly, I don’t like you using real bullets on people, you know this, but you did it anyway.” Bruce stressed, digging his nails into the palms of his hands till Ace’s soft bark stopped him from drawing blood.

“I’m sorry…” Jason whispered softly, shifting on his feet uncomfortably.

Bruce nodded. “I know… and I also know that you’re not going to stop using real bullets, no matter how I feel about it. You’re an adult man who no longer lives under my roof, no longer comes over, if I’m being honest.” Bruce relaxed more into the couch, like the tension in his body was cut as he closed his eyes and let his head fall back. “But…”

Jason bit his bottom lip before shuffling over, flopping down, and resting his head on Bruce’s shoulder, before he could make himself chicken out. “I’m sorry… I just…” Jason hummed, sorting through his thoughts.

“When you trained me to use guns all those years ago, I felt connected to them. I enjoyed how good I was, and how in control I could be. But it also made me feel guilty, using the weapon that had brought you so much pain. That had ruined your life and made you Batman.” Jason started, letting himself reminisce about the past. “And when I came back… it was like a ‘fuck you’ kinda thing, but overtime… I guess it’s how I stayed connected with you when you still didn’t know I was alive.”

Jason shrugged his shoulders as he absentmindedly played with Bruce’s hand and wrist, his fingers running over the multitude of scars, self-inflicted and otherwise. “I won’t stop using guns, but I am sorry that I shot that guy. I felt bad but wanted to act tough in front of you, I guess…”

Bruce hummed, watching Jason play with his fingers before speaking. “I wouldn’t say ‘ruined’ my life. After all, without my… unfortunate tragedy, I wouldn’t have gotten all my wonderful children. And I would never trade you or your siblings for the entire world.” Bruce said softly, pressing a kiss to Jason's forehead.

Jason let out a small cough and turned away, the tips of his ears and the base of his neck flushing a light red at how sappy Bruce was being. “… I don’t think we’ll ever truly agree on this topic,” Jason whispered softly.

“I know. I’m okay with that. I won’t love you any less.” Bruce gently knocked their heads together, something he hadn’t done since Jason was a little kid.

Jason gnawed on his bottom lip and shifted before hiding his face away in Bruce’s shoulder. “Yeah, I love you too, Dad. Just don’t be getting so sentimental all the time. It’s cringe.”

“What is it that Dick is always saying? ‘To be cringe is to be free’ or something?” Bruce quoted, making Jason scrunch up his nose in a way that was exactly the same as Bruce.

“Ew, please don’t go quoting Dickie. We both know he doesn’t need the ego boost.” Jason complained, grinning to himself as Bruce chuckled.

“Alright then, snack on my popcorn that I so graciously gifted to you. However, I’m gonna make you a real meal.” Jason stated, looking his Dad in the eyes with his hands on his hips. “I can’t believe Alfie let you out of the house without eating for… however long you decided to starve yourself!” Jason said in disbelief, Ace barking in agreement.

“Shush, I don’t need the two of you ganging up on me,” Bruce grumbled, fishing out a dog treat from his pocket and tossing it to Ace.

“Dad, can you open this bag of rice? It’s not opening, and Tim stole my scissors last week and hasn’t brought them back.” Jason whined, poking his head out from the kitchen.

It was an obvious lie; Jason could have easily opened the bag with his bare hands, and even then, Jason had a million knives lying around. But it warmed Bruce’s heart that Jason was asking him for help, just like when he was a child.

“Sure, only if I get to be a taste tester.” Bruce agreed with an easy smile, standing up and ambling his way to the kitchen.

“Duh, do you see anyone else here, old man?”

——

Tim felt himself slowly come to wakefulness, humming softly as he felt a large hand gently stroking his hair.

“Hi, sweetheart.” A deep voice rumbled. Very familiar, very safe.

“Bruce?” Tim groaned, forcing his eyes to stay open and focus on his Dad sitting on a chair he pulled up beside his bed. “What… what are you doing?”

Bruce hummed softly and pushed Tim’s bangs out of his face, taking a moment to gaze down at his son’s tired but relaxed expression. “I wanted to see you… I wanted to apologize.”

“For wha?” Tim sighed, melting into his pillow as Bruce lightly scratched his scalp just right. “Feel like a dog when you pet me, Dad…” Tim slurred, a lopsided grin forming on his face as Bruce chuckled.

“I think you’re more like a cat… or a ferret.” Bruce teased, stifling a laugh at Tim’s sleep but offended expression. “My bad. You’re just my son, who becomes very cute when he’s tired.”

“M’ not cute. I’m a grown man.” Tim complained, most definitely not pouting. “Didn’t answer my question… what are you doing here?”

“I was weird last week, wasn’t I? You and your siblings probably talked about it.” Bruce said, deciding not to beat around the bush anymore than he already had. “I’m sorry about that, Tim. I don’t really know what had gotten into me.”

Tim hummed and nodded, staring up at Bruce, looking decidedly less sleepy than a few seconds ago.

“But, I’m only apologizing for how I dismissed you. You’re an adult, Tim, and you and your siblings always remind me of that, so I’m putting this firmly in your hands. I love you, and I don’t want you to destroy yourself with a bad sleepy schedule.”

Tim opened his mouth, probably to call Bruce a hypocrite, but one look from Bruce just stopped him up.

“Yes, I know, I do the same things, which is why I’m telling you this. I suffered the consequences of sleep deprivation and a dependence on caffeine. I’m still dealing with the symptoms, and I don’t want you to be stuck in this cycle like I am.” Bruce gently cupped Tim’s cheek, his thumb brushing under Tim’s eyes as he looked at the eye bags his child had.

“You are so young and so bright. Doing this will put a strain on you and hurt you in the future. I can’t force you to do anything, and I know you barely take what I say into consideration.” Bruce let out a huff of laughter. “But take this into consideration: I love you, and your family loves you. We want the best for you and your health. Please take a break, my dear.”

Tim sniffled and looked up at Bruce sadly. “I know, I know it’s just… I feel like I have to prove myself, you know? I don’t mean to brush you off or anything, but it feels like I’m the only one who can get these cases done, and if I’m off sleeping or doing anything else, people could be getting hurt. It’ll be my fault.”

“If I’ve ever made you feel like I’m disappointed in you for taking care of yourself, you have my explicit permission to slap me or punch me or just do whatever you want,” Bruce said seriously, his mouth drawn in a thin line. “If you don’t want to, call Clark.”

“Even if a million cases never get solved, I’d be happy just knowing you’re safe, happy, and healthy,” Bruce said softly. “I mean, you could quit being Red Robin tomorrow and I’d be happy.”

“Dad.”

“Sorry, couldn’t help myself.” Bruce grinned, causing Tim to grin back at him. “I’m real sorry, Timmy, honest.”

“S’ okay, I forgive you. I’m sorry too, Dad.”

“That’s okay, I forgive you, too,” Bruce said softly, noticing how Tim had regained the sleepy look in his eyes. “Guess I’ve kept you up for too long, go to sleep, my dear.”

Tim gripped the sleeve of Bruce’s turtle neck as he tried to pull away, frowning in an exaggerated manner that he would deny to the ends of the earth, which looked like pouting.

“Hey, you disrupted me in the middle of my nap. The least you can do is join me, Dad.” Tim said, tugging Bruce back toward him.

“Tim, I’m not sure your bed is big enough for both of us,” Bruce said warily, still allowing his son to tug him closer without any resistance.

“That’s okay, I’m fine with lying on top of you, and I know you are too,” Tim said with a sleepy grin, content to let his Dad rearrange his body so the two were lying down comfortably.

“Good?” Bruce murmured softly, running his hands through Tim’s hair as his second youngest started to drift off once more.

“Yea… all… good,” Tim whispered, a small smile on his face as he felt Bruce press a kiss to his forehead before he drifted off once more, feeling a thousand times lighter.

——

Bruce listened to the phone ring impassively, not really expecting his youngest son to pick up. So, when he heard Damian’s stiff voice mail message that Dick had forced him to set up instead of the standard one, he sighed softly.

“Hello, Damian… I hope you’re having fun over at the Kent farm. I just wanted to call and say that I miss you.” Bruce paused, looking down at the note cards he had written just to map out what he wanted to say before pushing them away. “I can’t wait till you’re back home, but I know you love being surrounded by all the animals. Be safe, say hi to Lois for me, I love you, Habibi.”

Bruce set down his phone and frowned, already rethinking the message he left when his phone rang, Damian’s name flashing on the screen. Without a single second's thought, Bruce picked up his phone before it could ring twice.

“Baba…” Damian hiccuped the moment Bruce picked up, breaking his heart completely. “You…”

“Oh no, baby, take a deep breath for me. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.” Bruce tried to soothe, helping Damian work through his hiccups and calm down. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you again. D-do you want me to hang up?”

Damian hiccuped again softly before sniffling. “No… can you come pick me up?”

Bruce’s eyebrows shot up in confusion, even if he was already standing up and making his way to the Batcave. Secret identity be damned, he was taking his fastest jet. “Me? You don’t want Jon or Clark to drop you off? It’d be faster.”

“No… I just really want to see you. Is that alright?”

“Of course, it is Hayati, I want to see you as well. I missed you so much.” Bruce took in a short breath and punched in the coordinates for the Kent farm, ignoring the lurch as the jet spread out of the cave and was at the farm in under ten minutes.

The moment Bruce jumped out of the jet, Damian was in his arms, hugging him tightly, which was really special because even after all these years, Damian rarely initiated physical affection.

“I’m sorry! I was being so horrible-“ Damian blubbered, soaking the front of Bruce’s turtle neck with his tears.

“Hey, no no no. What’s this? Who said my son was horrible? Where did you ever get such a silly idea?” Bruce immediately shut down Damian’s self-deprecating words, picking Damian up and kissing his forehead before glancing over at Clark with a concerned but confused expression.

“He’s been on his phone a lot, I think he might’ve read somethin’ online,” Clark whispered, gently patting Damian on the back before ushering a worried Jon inside to give them as much privacy as they could.

Bruce carried Damian inside the jet, activating the lead lining so the Kents wouldn’t be able to listen in. Bruce knew Damian would die of mortification if Jon heard him being more emotional than he already was.

Damian silently took the bottled water Bruce offered him but made no move to open it, instead swinging his legs over the edge of the chair where Bruce sat him.

“I know it’s dangerous outside… especially in Gotham… but…” Damian bit his lower lip, trying to fight off the onslaught of tears through sheer force of will. “I read online that a lot of parents don’t let their kids stay out all night, but it’s for a good cause. I’m a very mature person, I'm different than regular people.”

Bruce sighed and ran his fingers through his hair before kneeling in front of Damian, making sure to make eye contact with his youngest child. “It’s not that I don’t believe that you’re capable of taking care of yourself. In fact, I know you are. But your siblings can attest to the fact that I worry and I will always worry, no matter how ‘mature’ you see yourself.”

“An overnight charity event for animal rights is an admirable gesture to give your free time up for, but I can’t allow it, Damian.” Bruce reached for Damian’s hand and gently held it. “You’re still newly fourteen, and no matter what you think or how you feel, you are a child, and it is my duty as your father to protect you and keep you safe.”

Damian let out a sigh and leaned forward, resting his head against Bruce’s shoulder and frowning. “But… I really wanted to go.”

“I know, baby,” Bruce murmured, rubbing Damian’s back. “And if one of your siblings, or I, was free that night, we would’ve gone with you. But we’re not, and I’m not sending you there alone with people I haven’t met.”

Damian nodded. He knew it was reasonable, logically, but he was still only a kid. He wanted what he wanted.

“You have every right to feel upset, and I’m sorry it seemed like I just shipped you off without talking to you, sweetheart. It was rough last week, but that’s not an excuse. I should’ve calmly explained it to you.” Bruce apologized, pulling back from the hug so he could look Damian in the eyes.

“Damian,” Bruce started. “I’m not allowing you to go to that overnight charity event. I understand it’s for a cause you care about deeply, but I care about you more. I love you so much, and all I want is for you to be safe.”

Damian laughed softly, wiping away the tears on his face and hugging Bruce tightly. “Explanation received and understood, Baba. I… love you too.

Bruce pressed two quick kisses to Damian’s cheeks, silently reverent that Damian had grown so much and was happily receptive to his physical affection before pulling back and standing up.

“Let’s get home. I’ll let you pick out ten charities for wildlife and animal care to donate to, hm?”

Damian nodded and straightened in the seat, putting on an air of his usual elegance even if his face was still red and splotchy from his cry session.

“I would like that very much, Baba. I’m not going to get grounded, am I? This doesn’t technically count as ‘running away’. I read that online.”

Bruce sighed before chuckling. “I’m a little worried about what else you read online, but no, you’re not getting grounded. This was on me after all.”

Damian nodded. “Good. Now let’s go home. I want to sleep in my own bed.”

——

<Prev>. <Explanation>.

[meteoriteric]

Sloth drawing of my daugther, gyaru Ayano, and her ugly ass crush. 💕

You can tell I don't like my son-in-law very much...

There is the refference!!

[meteoriteric]

Superman turns into a total idiot around Batman - not because he’s scared of him, but because, well... the guy’s terrifyingly hot. Like, Bruce just needs to stand there brooding in the shadows, and Clark’s brain goes straight to static.

At the very start of their collaboration, Batman is extra worried. The fact that the most powerful being on Earth trips over his words, laughs at jokes that aren’t even jokes, and forgets basic Kryptonian science mid-conversation is worrying.

To Batman, the fact that the most powerful being on Earth is an idiot is worrying.

Clark’s completely fine though, he's an actual genius. It’s just that Batman is unfairly attractive, and it’s hard to think straight when someone that competent, that sharp, and that ridiculously gorgeous is glaring at you from beneath a cowl.

[meteoriteric]

oKAY I'M BACK IN MY DELULUS.

WHAT ARE OUR THOUGHTS IN GYARU AYANO X BUDO??????

It will be like, Budo thinks bc Ayano is a Gyaru she also is a Bully, and avoids her like fire lmao

But maybe Ayano likes him????? And she is sad he doesnt like her, BUT,,, Info-chan tells her that because Budo is a club lider, He has an obligation to let you try for at least one week before rejecting or accepting her to join the club (sources?? Idk I just made that up for the sakes of the story)

So, she is happy to try the club!! And she gets the chance to see her senpai more close.

Days pass and feelings grow, but Budo is still thinking she is a Bully (omg what a idiot, but in a cute way) so he is conflicted.

So he goes to one of his bests friends, Sho Kunikida, for another point of vist.

Budo: so, Lets say I have a friend who likes a Girl, but she is... Problematic. Like, she is mean to others and bullies people, what do you think he should do??

Sho:....

Budo: because I think she is so pretty and funny, but again, I cant tolerate violence and Abuse...

Sho: are we talking about Aishi-san??

Budo: WHAT, NOOOO, NONONONONO-

Sho: Okay, because I can't wrap my head around the fact that Aishi-shan, the same one who made Ronshaku and her group be more kind and join other groups, being a bully herself.

Budo: wait what???

Sho: yeah, and not only that, she is so kind that would help you with anything, the other day she helped Najimi-san search for a book she lost, and they're not even friends.

Budo:...

Sho: thougth, i don't know if she had friends, she is quite shy, i'm surprised she jokes with you in the club. She is mainly alone any other day.

Budo:....

Budo: so she is not a bully???

Sho: What?? Dude did you listening to me?? She prob would prefer kill herself than to bully anyone.

Budo: I need to go and confess her my feelings rn.

And he runs out of the room

Sho: Uuuuuh, good luck ig!????

[meteoriteric]

Tim walks into Bruce’s study where he’s ’working’ but in actuality just texting Clark, who was canceling on a date they had planned

Tim: *holding out his hand* Give me fifty bucks

Bruce: *takes out his wallet and hands 50 bucks to him* Wait, why?

Tim: *pocketing the money* You haven’t wished me happy Pride month yet

Bruce: *holding out his hand* You haven’t wished me happy Pride Month either. I’ve been out longer than you’ve been alive

Tim: *whispers* Fuck *hands him back the 50* Can’t believe I forgot you were bi too

Bruce: *hums and puts his money back in his wallet before glancing down at his phone with an evil grin* … Y’know, Clark would probably feel guilty enough to give you money

Tim: *evil grin that’s the exact same as Bruce’s* Interesting… *leaves*

Bruce: *sighs with a small smile* I gave birth to that boy… he’s just like me

[meteoriteric]

Bruce Wayne has entirely too many secrets that he doesn’t realize are secrets.

He’s traveled the world and has seen and experienced shit. He often forgets that people aren’t detectives like him so they have no fucking clue.

Bruce has extensive ‘dad lore’ that knows even Alfred knows about. Bruce just never thinks of it as necessary to talk about.

They’ll be having dinner and Bruce will be like “That reminds me of that one time I climbed the direct route up to the East Face on Mt. Everest.”

And it’s a completely WTF moment for all his kids to realize they don’t know shit about Bruce’s life before they came into it.

[meteoriteric]

Bruce walks into the kitchen one day at breakfast and sticks a golden star right on Dick’s forehead.

Silence overtakes all of his kids as they stare incredulously because what the actual fuck??

“B?” Dick questioned warily, going crossed eyed as he tried to stare at the star in his forehead.

“Congratulations Dickie, you have successfully made only five death threats to individuals this entire week.” Bruce said solemnly, patting Dick on the head before turning to face his other children.

“Unfortunately, I will not be giving out any more gold stars.” Bruce’s eyes gazed at his children, particularly staying on Jason and Damian for a second longer than anyone else’s.

“Wha-? What about me??” Duke protested, throwing down his fork, a small splatter of syrup splashing onto the new wood varnish.

Bruce raised an eyebrow. “Duke, I’m Batman.”

“Right.” Duke muttered, slumping back down in his chair. “Stupid pickpocketers, next time I’ll make sure they can’t squeal.”

“Father! I demand a recount!” Damian’s chair squeaked loudly as he shot up from it, his small face set in a stubborn frown so similar to Bruce’s. “Grayson made two death threats to thugs on patrol yesterday.”

“Fucking tattle tale!” Dick hissed, grabbing his forehead and scampering away from Bruce, just in case he tried to take away his good star.

Bruce nodded and looked thoughtful. “Hmm, seven death threats… I’ll allow it. However, seven has become the cap in order to get a gold star.”

“One for everyday of the week!” Jason grinned, his eyes zeroing in on a barely awake Tim. “And since I’m long past the threshold…” Bruce slapped him on the back of the head, making him curse.

Cass tugs on Bruce’s sleeve and points to herself, the silent question very loud. “No Cass, your whole existence is a threat but also Stephanie likes to talk.”

Cass clicks her tongue and sits back down, phone already in hand, probably texting Stephanie about her betrayal.

“Looks like Dick is winning.” Bruce stated, suppressing a smirk as all of his kids heads whipped around and stared at him. Of course they would take the bait, there were as competitive as he was.

Even Tim now looked mostly aware of what was happening.

“It’s a new week, good luck.” Bruce nodded, walking out of the dining room, a grin breaking out across his face as the room erupted with noise.

[meteoriteric]

Bruce Wayne is an OMEGA

Anyone who tells you otherwise is LYING!!

While I do occasionally like to indulge in alpha Bruce Wayne fanfics, omega Bruce Wayne does it like no other

It’s just… mmmm so good

I think Bruce would either be a lot more in touch with his emotions if he was an omega or be a lot more repressed. Both are amazing for fanfictions

Disregarding the romantic aspect of the omega verse and focusing on the familia part is my favorite to be honest

Guilty pleasure, love it when Bruce is the only omega in the entire family. Whether or not they’re alphas or betas, just an overprotectiveness of Bruce is what I need to see

They’re shooting daggers at literally everyone like: get the fuck away from my mom

I think it’s so precious

Also lactation

[meteoriteric]

We truly underestimate how THIRSTY gothamites would be for Batman.

First off: The fact that Gotham citizens haven’t mass migrated to other cities tells me they’re absolute freaks. Yeah, you can get an apartment for 13$/mo, but chances are, Joker’s either gonna be your roommate, or neighbor. Not worth it.

Secondly: He’s big tiddy goth gf personified.

He cannot get any work done because he’s catcalled. Constantly. Sometimes during interrogations.

“You can tell me where Penguin’s next hit is gonna be, or I can smash your fingers.”

“Smash ME!”

Bruce, with the biggest sigh ever to exist: Please go back home, random civilian.

It gets particularly worse after he starts adopting the batkids, because now, not only has he achieved gravity shattering MILF status, he’s so busy with child rearing he sometimes forgets to shave.

Gotham twitter starts going crazy for the #Batbeard, and it gives the batkids severe brain damage. Everytime someone tweets about wanting to ride Bruce’s face, a piece of their soul dies.

[meteoriteric]

here tumblr can have this too

[meteoriteric]

Little dumb draw of Gyaru!Ayano since is all I have in my brain those days...

(i do NOT LIKE TO DRAW and it shows 😞😞 But Ayano deserves all the effort I can give!!)