#//maybe I should put more thought into organizing this blog

[devildom-moss]

This is sort of a joke so only do this if you want to but: brothers with an mc who eats moss like kris from deltarune. It's..... weirdly attractive? There's a sheep joke to be made here

Sometimes we need a silly little joke, and that's okay. I hope you like it anon. Is the moss thing related to this blog name or is it just random? Also, I don't know who that is - and I had to look up what deltarune is. Maybe it's an age thing or maybe it's just one of those topics I know nothing about. Either way~

Also, I'll be honest, I set up an excel sheet with all of my requests organized by post type before I did this request. Now I feel more organized. Yay.

The demon brothers react to MC eating moss

(SFW) (silliness)

Word Count: +1,600

Lucifer

No. No. No. No. “Spit that out right now, MC.”

They’re going to give this poor single parent of 6 an aneurysm. Moss could be dangerous for MC. Where did they even get that? Did they at least wash it before shoveling it into their mouth?

What is he going to tell Diavolo if moss gets them sick? “Yeah, sorry about needing you to call a human doctor for MC. I looked away from them for one minute, and they started eating moss.” He has a responsibility to keep MC safe.  

Lucifer is the type to order MC to get a psych eval when he sees them eating moss. He knows it’s weird and potentially dangerous. This kind of unusual behavior should be closely monitored by a professional.

He’ll nearly lose his mind believing that MC had definitely lost theirs.

“What in the Devildom has gotten into you? Have you utterly lost it? MC, I can’t handle these kids on my own anymore. I need you to be sane and relatively normal, please.”

Please don’t do this to him. Lucifer needs stability in his life, and eating moss is not the picture of stability.

He will make MC’s potential problem about him for a bit in true bad single parent fashion.

Mammon

“The hell ya doin’?!”

Mammon will not hesitate to point out how weird he thinks they are. He doesn’t want to hurt MC’s feelings, but he can’t stop himself from giving them a look of confusion and light disgust.

“That can’t possibly taste good, can it? Ya can’t just go ‘round eatin’ any plant ya see.”

Once the initial surprise works through him, he’s just worried about MC eating something weird. What would he do if they got sick? What would he tell Lucifer? He’s their guardian, and he takes that role more seriously than he likes to let on.

Mammon’s the most likely to try to physically remove the moss from MC’s mouth (but Lucifer is a close second). It could be dangerous. He’ll confiscate MC’s moss if they have any left and keep a close eye on them.

His search history from that day will be telling. “is moss dangerous for humans” “is moss dangerous for humans to eat” “types of moss that are safe for humans to eat” “how to tell if my human is sick” “human ate something bad what happens” “why did my human eat moss” “is my human mentally ill” “Devildom human doctors near me” “human-friendly moss” “good dates for humans” “how to charm weird humans” “how to romance weird humans no magic” (He got distracted.)

Leviathan

Levi finds it funny (and he probably actually knows which character you’re referencing, anon). It’s weird, sure, but he figures whatever MC is doing, it’s pretty harmless.

He wonders if that applies to algae. It might make cleaning out his fish tanks a bit easier if MC can and wants to eat it. The thought pops into his head, but Levi decides against it.

It’s strangely comforting that MC has something weird and arguably off-putting about them. Usually, he’s the weird, gross one. (This is where creepy Levi kicks in and he wants to know more about MC’s weird habits. Maybe if it turns out that they’re super weird, he can keep them all to himself. However, Levi lets his creepy thoughts go as quickly as they came.) Levi unlocked new information. Friend points +50. MC’s charm points +30.

“If I kiss you right now, that’s close enough to touching grass, right?” That’s a thing he’s supposed to do, isn’t he? Shit. He didn’t mean to say that out loud, but it’s too late.

Levi’s one of the brothers who will just let MC be and do their thing. He might double check and make sure MC isn’t going to get sick, but after that, he’ll leave them be. It’s not really his business. If it makes MC happy, he won’t judge.

Satan

Oddly supportive boyfriend.

The man’s a little feral and weird. I think he would find it kind of precious and adorable; it’s kind of like how cats like to eat grass.

He’d spend a while figuring out which mosses are safe to consume, asking MC if they have any preferences for which moss types they enjoy. Do they prefer certain textures and mouth feels? Are certain colors preferable? Which moss tastes the best?

Then, he would set up a moss terrarium for MC filled with their favorite mosses. Satan may ask them to help him build it as a cute little craft date. This way, MC will have a way to safely snack on moss whenever they wish. A terrarium has the added benefit of MC being able to control where the moss comes from so that they can avoid any harmful bacteria, viruses, pesticides, etc.

Of course, Satan understands that eating moss is unusual, and he may question what it is that compels MC to eat moss, but he doesn’t see the need to stop it.

He may taste the moss himself (in the same way that someone with a pet may be tempted to try pet food). It would, in all likelihood, disappoint him, but MC’s enjoyment is all that matters.

Satan has a real “MC can have a bit of moss – as a treat” kind of mindset. He’ll probably try to see if he can hand-feed MC like they’re a stray cat. He’s weird, too, but we love him.

Asmodeus

“Honey, no. This isn’t how we transition into our feral era.”

Asmo thinks it’s kind of gross, but he asks if maybe eating moss is good for the skin or something (because he can’t think of any other reason MC would even consider eating moss).

When they tell him that’s not why, he gives them a troubled stare with his arms crossed over his stomach. “Uhm, hun. Why are you eating it then?”

Even if MC tells him that it tastes good, there’s no way he’s trying it unless it has incredible health and beauty effects. He can’t stomach the thought of it.

After the disgust washes over him, the concern floods his system instead. He asks if MC is sure that they can and should be eating moss. Regardless of what MC tells him, Asmo will go to Satan or Lucifer (probably both) to make sure that MC isn’t putting themselves in any danger. He couldn’t handle it if MC got sick. All that stress would destroy his skin (and break his heart beyond repair).

Once he ensures MC’s health, he tries to just let MC do their thing. “Just please don’t eat that stuff around me, ‘kay? And if you eat it, please brush your teeth before you kiss me.”

Beelzebub

“Aw, MC, are you hungry? I’m sure we have something more delicious than moss in the fridge. I was just on my way to get a snack. I’ll pick one up for you too, okay?”

He’s probably eaten some moss in his time. He’s no stranger to eating weird things, so his reaction is the least judgmental.

Sometimes moss looks delicious, right? It just makes sense to him that they would want to try eating it.

Beel will definitely ask them to spare some of their moss so he can try it, too. If the moss tastes relatively bad, he might be weary of their tastes in the future, but as long as eating it won’t hurt them, Beel doesn’t care.

Beel is probably the only one who would try to suggest tastier methods of eating the moss. “What about putting it on top of ice cream? Or maybe in a cheeseburger. Mmm. . . cheeseburger. A moss salad might be more appetizing, too. I could blend it into a smoothie or some soup for you. How does that sound?”

It makes him feel a bit comforted that they both have eating habits that others think are weird – like it brings them closer and is a special connection only they can share.

Belphegor

He’s seen Beel bite into a pillar at the castle when he’s hungry. He’s not too troubled by a bit of moss-eating.

Belphie trusts MC not to be stupid enough to ingest moss that would be toxic to them, and not worrying saves him a bit of energy and time. Additionally, I think Belphie would be relatively knowledgeable about plants, so he would probably be able to tell if what MC is eating is likely to kill them.

For the most part, he just doesn’t care. MC could even kiss him with fresh moss breath, and he won’t give a shit. It’s probably better than morning or fish breath, and he’s still getting a kiss, so he doesn’t see a reason to complain.

He won’t be ultra supportive like Satan, but he will be a bit more enthusiastic about it than others – mostly because it gives him an idea for a prank. He could make soup with moss in it, have MC bring a bowl to Lucifer, and eat one themselves so he isn’t suspicious. Then Lucifer would end up eating moss soup. He could probably do that with multiple types of food, too.

One (stupid) point of contention will be that Belphie thinks moss is better as a pillow than as a snack, but he acknowledges that’s a ridiculous difference of opinion. However, that could be a nice date idea: find a mossy forest where he can take a nap while MC gets to snack on moss.

He will probably get scolded by Lucifer and Mammon for enabling MC’s behavior (and not at all because he goes on weird moss dates with MC).

[qtboni]

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[softspaceboibrian]

Fell in Love with the Fire Long Ago || Jamie Tartt

Prologue

Pairing: Jamie Tartt x Y/N - Social Media Manager for AFC Richmond || I used she/her pronouns, but there is no actual physical description, so the pronouns can be switched with whatever anyone wants or prefers!

Summary: The first meeting.

Warnings: maybe some swear words? a lot of anxiety. I think that's it

Wc: 3593

A/N: this story is based on this idea . as always, if you want to read more, feel free to leave a comment. If you wish to be added to the taglist, let me know! anyways, thanks for reading! ALSO I'm making a playlist for this fic inspired by the chapters! let me know if you would like me to post it!

Taglist: @nicklet94 @respondingtoshowerthoughts-blog @katdahlali @sonyume @kerguelenn @janalustare @thebarisinhell99 @dancemajor1 @f1maverick @shakespeareanwannabe

The team had eventually gone to the pitch to train, while you had stayed behind. You inhaled deeply. For the moment, you were safe. You had managed to slip away and into your office unnoticed. However, after a few minutes of sitting alone in the room with your laptop’s screen casting a gentle blue light over the documents in front of you, you couldn’t ignore the unsettling sensation that anxiety was leaving in your stomach, as if a hand from within was gripping and squeezing all of your organs, tugging ever so slightly at your heart and making it drop whenever you heard muffled footsteps down the corridor, approaching, passing by, then moving away. I can’t take it anymore, you said under your breath, as if you were talking to someone that wasn’t there. Quickly, you gathered your stuff and made your way down to the coaches’ room. Was it the best place to hide? Obviously not! The room was directly connected with the team’s changing room. Still, the corridor on the ground floor wasn’t carpeted, and you could much more easily control the situation from there. Also, despite being still angry at Ted, you knew that the coaches, all three of them, would do anything just to know you were comfortable. And so, you settle down in the spare chair on the opposite side of the room from Nate’s desk. That was going to be your office for the day. You nodded, as you displayed all your documents and stationary carefully, with order, on the desk in front of you.

You looked around the room as you waited for your laptop to come back to life. You didn’t exactly love the charcoal walls with the AFC Richmond logo right in the middle of it. You often wished they would let you redecorate the space, but everyone was too afraid you would choose a wallpaper similar to the forest green one in your office. You would laugh. You were spending most of your days in your office, anyways. Except for that day. So, grey walls would have to do.

A ding sound brought you back to reality.

You immediately directed your attention to the screen in front of you and opened the notification. It was an email conversation between Rebecca, Keeley, Higgins, and you. The title: TARTT’S COMEBACK ANNOUNCEMENT. All capital letters, as if that was the most urgent thing in the world. You opened it and read through the messages. Rebecca was asking when the announcement was going to be put on the team’s accounts, because she thought it was important to do it as soon as possible. The sooner, the better, read her email, the sentence in italics, as to attract more attention. You could feel that nauseating sensation slowly remerging. You took a deep breath before moving to the next message. It was from Keeley, and she said that it would be better to just wait a while. Ted has decided to put him on the second team for now, she said was the reason she thought we should wait. But let’s hear from Y/N first, she’s the expert. The corners of your mouth turning slightly upwards, as you felt Keeley’s preoccupation and affection for you disguised beneath those words. No answer from Higgins yet. The decision was yours. You were the social media manager. You set the rules when it came to these things. That gave you a bit of relief. You clicked the Reply to all button, and started typing.

            Dear all, [you always wrote that, even though it was just the four of you and there was no reason for you to be so formal.] if you want my personal opinion, I think we should kick him off the team. [You weren’t exactly sure why you were so angry. Because, in reality, you weren’t. You were sad, disappointed, but not angry. Maybe it was easier to be angry than to be sad.] On the other hand, if you want my professional opinion, then I say we wait. If it’s true that Ted has put him on second team, then there is no need to announce it just yet. It would be misleading for the fans who would then expect to see him out on the pitch already in the next match. I say we wait and, when the time comes and Ted puts him in, then I’ll take his picture while he’s playing with the team, and we’ll announce it that way.

You clicked Send. You waited. Two minutes went by. No answer yet. You could already picture Rebecca stomping down the corridor to come and talk to you, saying that she had to make the calls - not true: you were in charge of the socials, you decided. Plus, you knew that Rebecca would understand your point of view. Or at least you hoped.

Five more minutes went by. A ding. Message from Leslie Higgins, Head of Football: I agree with Y/N. You smiled. Three minutes later, another ding. Message from Keeley Jones: I second that. You inhaled deeply. You could feel a weight lift off your chest. For now, you were safe.

After scrolling on Instagram for a good ten minutes, stalking other teams profiles to get inspiration, you actually started working. You weren’t sure how, but you had managed to get so focused on what you were doing, that you got startled when the distant murmurs of the boys coming back to the changing room for lunch break eventually reached you. You looked up from your iPad, where you had been sketching the new social media campaign, only to realise that an hour and a half had gone by without you even noticing. You looked around, panicking, trying to get your mind to slow down and think of an escape plan. But when you finally settled on leaving everything there and running outside to the parking lot, the soft murmurs had become clear voices only a few meters away. You were stuck there, with nowhere to run.

So, you stayed there, paralysed in that chair, until the coaches walked in. You could tell they were not expecting to find you in there. Ted looked at you, quietly, and you knew he wanted to say something, but you never met his eyes, hoping that would be a clear enough sign to him to just leave you be. You knew you had no reason to be angry at him nor at Rebecca, but it was the easiest way to get your frustration out. And Ted himself knew that what had happened that morning wasn’t truly directed at him, that you weren’t actually mad at him. So, as he walked by, he offered you a kind smile, one that said I’m sorry. But you just couldn’t bring yourself to reply.

Beard, on the other hand, laid a hand on your shoulder as he walked by, giving it a quick squeeze, before going to take his place at his desk. Somehow, somewhere down the line, Beard had become a sort of father figure for you, the type of bond that you can only share with certain people: the quiet looks, the silent nods, quick side hugs, hands on the shoulder or the arm as a reassuring sign. And you actually loved this subtle relationship that you two had. Most people would think that neither of you wanted to have nothing to do with the other, but that was far from the truth. You had bonded over your shared passion for reading, even though you mainly read narrative books, while he generally went for autobiographies and inspirational books. However, what truly brought you closer was the fact that, despite being half his age and being born in a different country, having grown up to different music and films, you were still able to understand 80% of his pop references, and more importantly, were always asking him curiously to explain the remaining 20%.

You gave him a quick smile, before turning around and meeting Nate’s gaze. “Moved in for the day?” He asked with his newly found confidence.

A quick nod. “Yep.” You replied, popping the p.

“Still thinking about renovating this place?” He asked jokingly.

“Always.” Your subtle smile told him that, as much as you enjoyed talking with him, that wasn’t the best moment for you.

“D’you want me to go and get Sam for you?” He asked, already making his way towards the door. “I promise I’ll be discreet.” He smiled a kind and comforting smile. You nodded as the memory of him walking in on you and Jamie in the boot room came resurfaced in your head. How is this the same person you wondered.

A few moments later, Sam walked into the office, already changed in his normal clothes. “We’re going for kebabs.” He told you, the invitation implicit in the way he spoke the words.

You didn’t say anything. You just stood up and grabbed your bag, before following him into the corridor. Isaac, Colin, Dani, and a few others were standing right outside the door, almost creating a sort of barrier between the exit and the door to the changing room. You looked at them, a soft smile forming on your lips. But in your head, all you could hear was you brain telling you stop being so dramatic, he’s just a boy. And you knew your head was right, but your heart still ached at the idea of seeing him back.

You eventually started walking down the corridor, linking arms with Sam on one side, Colin on the other, as Richard told everyone that one day you all had to allow him to take you to this new French winery that had just opened in Chelsea. A night on the town, he said with his strong French cadence, it would be fun! And you rejoiced in seeing him so passionate about something. You had grown to love seeing the team being truly happy about things, about life. A nostalgic feeling, maybe, because it reminded you about how excited you used to get when Jamie used to make reservations for the two of you at those posh little restaurants that you would have only been able to admire from outside where it not for him. Let me spoil you, babe, he used to say. You missed that, the thrill, the enthusiasm, the looking forward to those kinds of things. But you pushed the thought aside, focusing on what the conversation had just moved to.

You had almost made it out the door, when a voice echoed down the corridor, bouncing off the walls until it reached your ears. “Y/N!” You would be able to recognise that thick Mancunian accent everywhere. You looked slowly at the men in front of you as you took a deep breath, gathering all of your strength, Then, you turned around, finally meeting his eyes. Oh, how you had dreaded that moment. You had imagined it several times in the private of your own house. The doorbell would ring, and you would go open the door. He would be standing outside, hood on his head, his hair – which were now longer – falling in front of his face, in an attempt to cover his puffy red eyes. It was all a mistake, he would say, almost choking on his words. I shouldn’t’ve left. I should’ve never broken up with you. You’re the love of me life. You would stay silent, letting him do the talking. He would tell you how miserable life was without you. He would tell you that, without you, life was pointless, all black and white. And when he would eventually look at you, his eyes would be filled with tears. And you would drag him in, grabbing him by the collar of his hoodie and pulling him to you, kissing him so passionately that he would need to press you against the wall to hold you up. You would kiss, you would make love, and then, naked in your bed, you would talk, for hours. But that wasn’t real life. That only happened in rom-coms. Real life was there, in front of you. And he wasn’t wearing his hoodie, he didn’t have puffy eyes. He looked fine.

You said nothing. You looked at him, you held his gaze, but said nothing. “Hey.” He said softly, in a warm familiar tone that, with the gentle smile he offered you, immediately brought back that burning sensation in the pit of your stomach. You could feel your heart beating, thumping in your ears. You nodded in return, the word stuck in your throat. You said nothing. “Can we talk?” He asked, hope plain on his face. You had almost forgotten that kind voice he usually used when talking with you, when he knew you were feeling uncomfortable, restless, nervous, when he could tell that something was disturbing you, and he wanted to make you feel better.

A part of you wanted to just run to him, immediately melting in his embrace, as he pressed his lips against your forehead. You wanted him to comfort you, to hold you, to rock you, as you finally took in his smell, one that you had loved so much, but had now forgotten. But another part, the sad part, the disappointed one, the one that couldn’t seem to forget how he had treated you in the last few days of your relationship, the words he had used, the coldness, that part stopped you from doing anything. So, you didn’t move. You stood there, surrounded by the people that had actually been there for you. “No, I’m sorry.” You replied flatly.

“I just-” He started to speak, and deep down in your heart you wanted him to talk, to say what was on his mind. You wanted to know if he was sad, if he regretted it.

But Isaac cut him off, putting himself between you and him. “She said no.”

You watched as his expression changed, as the hope on his face was slowly replaced by pain. “I understand.” He said. “I respect that.” You knew him well enough to notice the shift in his voice, the watery words that slowly left his lips. “Another time, maybe.” He added, his eyes lingering on your figure for a few moments, before turning around.

You stood there, frozen in the middle of the corridor, biting the inside of your cheek, as you watched his shoulders drop with disappointment. You had never seen him like that, and it hurt you. For a moment you thought of saying something, of calling him back, but as you tried to find the right words, his sulking figure turned right and retreated into the changing room.

Your eyes remained fixed on where his figure was a few moments before disappearing. As guilt and grief washed over you like a tidal wave, you almost forgot about the people next to you.

“That was very brave.” Sam’s voice brought you back to reality. You nodded still unable to look away, still hoping he would come back out.

“Sì!” Dani agreed. “Muy valiente!” and you could tell he was actually proud of you. They all were. In their heads, you had handled it greatly. But you hadn’t. And you hated the sensation it left in you.

Eventually, you all made your way outside, deciding to walk to the kebab place instead of driving. Fresh air is good for us, Jan Maas stated in his Dutch manner. But you knew that it was all a ruse, a way to get your head off what had just happened. They were all terrible liars.

As you got to the place, you settled in a booth, adding a few chairs so that you could all eat together at the same table. The boys immediately slipped into their usual topics for whenever they were out eating: the upcoming match; the last episode of that new action tv show that they had decided to watch together; making plans to go to the movies to watch the new Bond movie – planes that were never met due to matches and practice; someone’s latest match on Bantr; where to have the next family dinner – that was how they called the biweekly dinner the team had together. You nodded along, but your head was someplace else. You could have let him tag along, you told yourself. He’s probably eating lunch alone. You hated the idea of having abandoned him. And as the food finally arrived at your table, you felt the hunger in your stomach being replaced by sadness.

“Aren’t you going to eat?” Isaac asked between bites, noticing you hadn’t yet touched your wrap.

You quickly glanced around the table, feeling everyone’s eyes on you. “I can’t stop thinking about him.” You whispered. “We could have invited him. It wouldn’t have hurt anyone.” You said, tears instantly pooling at the corners of your eyes. Breathing had suddenly become more difficult, and you felt trapped in the middle of the bench, stuck between Colin and Sam.

“You have to give yourself time.” Sam put down his food, turning slightly towards you. “If you feel like you-”

But you cut him off. “I’m not talking about me. I’m talking about him. About how you all took my side, which I truly appreciate. But now he has no one there.” You started rambling, saying how you felt terrible because it was your fault, because you shouldn’t have gotten them that involved.

“Listen, Y/N, we understand your point. But he mistreated us as well.” Colin stopped your train of thoughts. “Don’t know if you remember, but he called me a jaundiced worm.” You met his eyes. “None of us is going to hate him forever. Pretty sure no one actually hates him. But we’re mad at him. He disrespected us. Yes, we took your side, but it was also our own side, okay? So, stop blaming yourself because it’s not your fault.” There was a small pause. “We just want him to realise what he did wrong, an apologise would be great. But I promise, no one is going to treat him like he treated us.” His voice was sincere, which in a way lifted a weight off your chest.

Half an hour later you were all back at the clubhouse, and the boys immediately ran to the changing room. You smiled at them, before entering the coaches’ room and taking your seat at the desk you had claimed as yours for the day. Post-lunch drowsiness washing over you, you decide to wait for the team to go out to the pitch before resuming your work. You picked up your phone and immediately opened Instagram. You hated how addicted you had gotten to social media, especially since you spent most of your days on it for work. But still, you couldn’t help it. You scrolled mindlessly down your feed, leaving the occasional like on puppy pics, videos of animals and of your favourite celebrities – Harry Styles, Hozier, Phoebe Waller-Bridge. You read the usual inspirational quote from one of those pages that you always end up following after a breakup, those that always provide you with the most appropriate sentences to write down on a sticky note, which you would then put on your fridge or on your desk at work, as a reminder of some sort. “You need to fall in love with yourself first”. Bullshit, you had thought, as the pen traced the words on that square piece of yellow paper a few months prior, before putting it on the mirror in your bedroom. It was still there.

“It’s one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself to forgive. Forgive everybody.” That’s what read the latest post. Damn you, Maya Angelou, you whispered, as you wrote down the quote on a new sticky note.

You stared at the piece of paper for a while, reading the words over and over. Then, somehow, your phone was back in your hands. On the screen, a chat. At the top, the name read “J” followed by a white heart. You had thought about changing it. But you never did.

Before you knew, your fingers were already typing away.

I don’t hate you.

You hit send.

I just need a little more time.

Send.

Not even five seconds later, the word Read appeared beneath the two bubbles.

Three little dots. He’s typing.

The little dots go away. Then they reappear. Then, they’re gone once again.

You locked your phone and put it down on the desk in front of you.

You could still clearly hear the team talking in the other room. The coaches were still talking in their room. He had time. He could still reply.

You stood up from your chair. Maybe I shouldn’t have messaged him, you thought as you paced the room, glancing at your phone every now and then, wondering why he hadn’t yet replied. You could feel Ted’s eyes on you, and you knew he wanted to come to you, ask you if everything was alright. But you were glad he didn’t.

You kept pacing, your steps measing the length of the room, the distance between the two desks.

Then, a notification.

You immediately ran to your phone.

I know, and I understand. Take all the time you need.

You felt that all too familiar itchy feeling of tears pooling at the corners of your eyes.

The three little dots appeared once more. You stared at the screen.

I’ll wait for you.

A/N: once again, thank you for reading <3

[jasntodds]

Too Heavy | J.T.

Pairing: Jason Todd x Fem!Reader

Request: @just-lost-inbetween-worlds​ : Can I get Jason Todd (doesn’t matter which version) with the prompts: bloodied knuckles, wiping the others tears away, as well as crying into their chest. Maybe bloodied knuckles bcs of punching something in a mental breakdown and then the rest happens.  Bad Things Happen Bingo Prompts

Summary: Sometimes things get a little too heavy for Jason

Warnings: Angst, blood, mentions of death, mental breakdown, hurt/comfort

Words: 2,802

A/n: I was listening to a lot of Too Heavy by The Plot In You while I wrote this so here we are lol If you wanna be added to my tag list, click the link below, send me an ask, or comment!! You can also follow my library blog @peteprkerlibrary​ !! If you like this, please reblog it and/or talk to me about it!!

masterlist | request info | tag list

Everyone has bad days. They come and they go. It gets better. It always gets better. But for Jason, his bad days are sometimes so rough and harsh, the world collapses from under him. He falls through the cracks into a black abyss, surrounded by every failure he’s ever had. He falls and falls and falls until he finally hits the bottom and the wind is sucked from his lungs in a hard smack. Leaving him alone in the pitch black coldness. Today is one of those days.

He’s just gotten back from patrol and he was quiet not to wake you. He walks steadily to the bathroom but his thoughts are circling the drain. Every step he takes is like twenty pounds added to his ankles and another thought joins the damned ride. Jason’s chest grows heavy as he finally reaches the bathroom, quietly shutting the door behind him.

The worst nights of patrol involve kids and tonight did. It’s always the most innocent of people that get to him. Most nights, he can handle it because it’s part of the job. It’s one of the reasons he puts the helmet on every night. But tonight is different. Tonight is different because it didn’t have the hopeful ending it should have and it’s not fucking fair.

Jason’s hands grip the bathroom counter so hard he thinks he might shatter it in his palms. He almost hopes he does. He looks at himself in the mirror, his back slightly hunched over and he looks hollow. A discarded shell of who he should have been. And he can’t stand it. His head spins while his eyes slam shut and his grip tightens harder against the cool stone.

His chest starts to heave as his breathing quickens. His chest grows heavy and he wants to start ripping out every single one of his organs in hopes it’ll lift some of the weight. The heaviness is suffocating and if he didn’t know any better, he’d think this would be his end.

But he knows better.

And this is the never-ending hell he’s trapped in while the inability to save the kids tonight triggers memories to flood back like overflowing rivers in a flash flood.

There’s the echo of metal on concrete seeping into his blood stream and that menacing laugh that never should be called a laugh beats against his eardrum. The feeling of the panic he felt that day wraps him in a cruel and painful hug as if to be living off of his inability to breathe properly. Images of the Joker and the look on his mom’s face flash across his eyes and he can’t take the heaviness of it all anymore.

The grief he suffers with is nearly paralyzing and it is agonizing. They say grief gets better but when is it that supposed to happen? Because it’s been years and he can’t breathe and he wants to rip his lungs out of his chest just to feel anything other than this. He was just a kid.

Jason was a just a kid.

Tears burn his eyes, one slipping by and sliding down his cheek and he grits his teeth so hard they nearly shatter under the pressure. All he wants is for it all to stop for even a second. He wants one damn second of relief.

He looks up at his own reflection once more and he can see some bruising from last week and he hates it. The white streak in his hair almost seems whiter in the light of the bathroom and he hates it. He hates it. He hates it and he can’t do it. He punches the mirror in a quick motion, just once and it shatters into the sink and over the counter.

“Fuck.” Jason groans because he knows it was loud and he can’t stop the tears now. They’re drenching his face and his breathing is racing, quivering.

Blood spills into the sink as Jason hovers his shaking hand over it. Not a single part of him even cares or pays the stinging any mind. All he can do is try his best to breathe and shake his thoughts away but nothing works. They’re still there. Flashing across his eyes like lightning in the middle of a raging storm.

His legs start to feel weak as if he’s just gotten done running for miles on end. It’s getting harder to stand the more he tries to fight his own breath and thoughts. His head spins and he his stomach turns and twists into gnawing nausea. And he can’t even be bothered to stand anymore because that is just getting too damn hard too. His own body is growing too heavy with every passing thought and he swears that’s some sort of cruel joke.

Jason sits on the floor against the counter, hanging his head and pulling his knees up to his chest. Tears fall down his cheeks and he tries to fight them off with every thought he has but nothing works. They fall anyway, staining his cheeks in a wet mess.

“Jason?” You call from outside the door. 

The shattering of glass woke you up and for a few seconds, you thought someone had actually broken in. And you were nearly frozen, stuck thinking if you had a weapon of any sort in the bedroom you could use. But then those seconds faded and you didn’t hear footsteps or shuffling through the apartment. You didn’t hear anything and when you checked the time to see it was after three, you knew.

“Jay?” You call again, knocking on the door gently when he doesn’t answer.

Your groggy voice breaks his heart. He never meant to wake you up.

Jason slides his hands over his face and clears his throat. “Go back to bed, sweetheart.” Jason tries to stabilize his voice but you can hear the weakness and quiver. He’s mastered the art of hiding pain but not disguising the pain of crying.

Taking the knob in your hand, you twist it slowly, gently pushing the door open. You spot Jason still in his Red Hood gear, minus the helmet, sitting on the floor with drops of blood on the floor. He keeps his head hung and his forearms on his knees. You spot blood on his knuckle with open wounds before you see the broken mirror and your heart just breaks for him.

You step in slowly and cautiously as if moving too quickly will make him dissolve right into the floor. “Hey,” You crouch down beside him, tilting your head to try and get a look at his face that’s covered by his messy hair. “What happened, Jay?”

“I’m fine.” Jason forces the words from the back of his throat and he hates how weak they sound. 

You don’t like the answer because anyone who’s fine doesn’t break a mirror. Anyone who’s fine doesn’t sit on the bathroom floor at three in the morning with bloody knuckles crying. He’s not fine but Jason has never been very good at admitting to anyone when he’s not. He’d rather drown than ask for a life preserver.

You move in front of him, sitting on your knees. You reach out cautiously, putting your hands on his wet cheeks. Jason’s eyes shut down hard with your touch and you’re so gentle with him. Why? What’s he done to deserve it?

You pick his head up softly and Jason lets you. His eyes are bloodshot as he looks at you. His pretty blue eyes are now a haunting shade of navy, like the sky over the ocean in the middle of hurricane. Why does the world treat him with such cruelty?

“Please, go back to bed.” He nearly begs you because you shouldn’t have to deal with all of his trauma.

It’s not fair for you to lose sleep over him. He swears you shouldn’t and you don’t deserve it. All he wants is to be alone with his grief. If anyone has to suffer what he went through, it has to be him. It can’t involve you. Not you.

But you’re stubborn and that thing in your chest beats endlessly for him.

You can see his chest moving harshly with every breath and he might be Red Hood but he was Jason Todd first. A kid trying to survive the best he could. A kid who just wanted to learn and be a kid. Smart mouth and relentless as hell. But a kid no one looked out for. Red Hood looks out for so many people, but who’s supposed to look out for Jason Todd?

“Please, I’m fine.” Jason voice finally cracks as a tear escapes his bottom lid. “Just go to bed. I’ll be there a minute.”

You move your hands from his cheeks and he thinks, for a second that for once, you might actually listen to him. And he’d be lying if that didn’t hurt, too. But, it’s you and you were never very good at following his instructions even on good days so you move closer to him and stretch out your arms.

“Come here, Jay.” Your voice is soft, etched in worry and love.

He’s reluctant at first because he knows if he does, he’ll lose it entirely. Every piece of him that’s been able to hold in a sob will finally crack and that’ll be it. But he sees the worry in every tired line of your face and you always look so inviting.

“I’m worried about you. Please.” You plead with him, your voice cracking with a mix of tiredness and sadness. And Jason can’t hold it in anymore because you’re worried about him.

Jason moves his legs and moves closer to you, resting his head against your chest because at his point, it’s all too heavy for him to even try for a proper hug. And folding into you seems a hell of a lot easier for everyone. You wrap one arm around his side and rest your other hand in his hair. And just like he breaks.

A sob rips through his throat, echoing through the bathroom and you have to swallow the lump that forms in your throat. He shakes against you, sliding his hands to your back and holding onto your shirt. His grip is tight as if he’s stuck between thinking you’ll disappear if he lets go or that he’ll disappear if he does. Your hand runs through his hair and you try to console him, knowing there isn’t much that can help at this point. But you try by playing with his hair and whispering softly to him despite your own heart aching and breaking for him.

Tears brim your own eyes as you hold him against you. If you could, you would claw out your own heart and replace his with yours. Maybe that would help some of his agony. Maybe that would make his pain a little more tolerable. Maybe if you could swap out your hearts, you could take some of his pain away. You’d do it if it meant he wouldn’t suffer so much.

Minutes tick by and his breathing is still harsh against you but the sobs have slowed. His grip is still iron-tight on your shirt and all Jason wants is for the world to stop spinning. He wants the aching in his chest to stop and he wants everything around him to stop feeling so damn heavy.

You pick his head up, cupping his cheeks in both hands again. His cheeks are tear stained and you swear you’ve never seen him look so broken before. Your thumb awipe over his cheeks, brushing the tears away gently.

Jason nearly shudders with the action.

“It’s okay, Jay.” You assure him and your voice is strained as if begging him to believe you.

“It’s fucking not.” He sputters, his brows pulling together and you can see him clench his jaw. “It’s all shit and those kids deserved fucking better.” His breath is hot, boiling on your skin as he seethes. And you know what lead him here tonight.

He told you. Right to your face he told you he died. He left out the gory details of it all for your own sake but you know he was just a kid. And you know why he was there and about the Joker. He was just a kid.

“Kids?” You questions and you know Jason always has a bad night when it involves kids.

“Forget it.” He lets out a scoff because he doesn’t want to talk about it. You don’t need to know the details.

“Hey, no.” You shake your head, eyes scanning over his face as your brows pull together. “I’ll listen all night, okay? I won’t ask anything if you don’t want me to, okay? You can talk or not. But, you’re gonna be okay.” Your eyes lock with his and he wants to believe you.

But he also knows he’ll back here again. He always comes back here. Haunted. The ghost of who he was then and the ghost of who he should have been follow him. He doesn’t think he’ll ever be able to shake them as much as he wants to.

He places his hands over yours and you can’t help but notice how big his hands are whenever he does this. “Just so damn sick of it.” His voice is rough and exhausted.

“I know.” You nod with understanding.

You’ll never be able to understand how he feels or what he goes through but you try. And you see it across his face. You see it in the way he turns in his sleep, when he actually gets sleep. You see it in the way he’s always observing everything around him, always on guard. And you can see it in the way he is with his weapons, there’s always at least two weapons on him at any given moment. As much as you want to understand exactly what goes on inside of his head, you won’t but you can see it. So, you try your best to help and just be there in capacity he’ll let you.

“Why don’t we get you in the shower? I’ll wash your hair, clean up your hand, and we can get into bed? I’ll rub your back and you can tell me what happened if you want. Or I can read to you until you fall asleep.”

He’s almost always reluctant when it’s been bad. He never thinks he deserves the kindness and care you offer to him. On good days, he can accept it. It’s something he struggles with still because no one ever been so kind and careful with him before. So, it’s hard but on good days, he finds it easier to accept. But on bad days, like these, he’s reluctant because if he can’t see the good himself, why should anyone else? But he looks at your eyes that glossy with worry and you give him this look that makes him feel like he’s been put under a microscope. And you would do anything for him.

“Thanks.” He mutters, taking your hands away from his face. “I got it.”

“I know.” You nod your head. “I want to.” You smile gently at him, tilting your head slightly to the right. “You’re not alone, ya know?” You assure him because you think it must be lonely dealing with everything he goes through. “I got you.” 

He knows. As hard as it is for him to accept the care and kindness you offer him, he knows because he notices everything. He notices how he always wakes up with a blanket on him when he falls asleep on the couch and the way you always have his favorite protein bars on hand even though you don’t like them. You’re the one missing sleep when you have work in the morning to sit on the bathroom floor with him. It’s hard to accept sometimes and he gets in his own head about it sometimes, but at the end of the night, he has you.

And you’ve always had a way of lifting some of that weight for him, maybe without even trying.

“Okay.” Jason finally agrees, still a hint of reluctance in his voice.

You get to your feet and offer him your hand.

He almost chuckles because you can’t actually help him from the floor. But he takes your hand in his anyway, getting to his feet. You look up to him with gentle eyes before closing the distance between the two of you and wrapping your arms around him as tight as you can.

It takes a few seconds before you feel Jason relax under your hug and his arms come around your waist. His chin lays on the top of your head and he feels like he can breathe a little better now. 

When things get a little too heavy, at least he has you to help lift some of the weight.

Tag list: @jasontoddsmentaldisorders // @purplerose291 // @lovelessamai  // @makaelaseresin // @lenidaslenchen // @mayfieldss // @ghostkingblake // @dgraysonss // @im-done-with-this-im-out // @velvetskies // @vivian-555 // @kebonita // @deyja-the-duck // @jasontoddslover // @captainmarvels-blog​

[astronomodome]

Tumblr Poll Tournaments & MCYT

So a while ago I made a post expressing my frustration with the way a lot of tumblr poll tournaments seem to exclude mcyt characters- or if they are included, people in the notes are rude about it. The first situation of these- the poll organizer including rules against submitting characters from mcyt- is something I can easily quantify. I've crunched some numbers in order to find out two things:

How common is this phenomenon, really?

Why does this happen in the first place?

A note before I start: I'm not blaming the poll organizers for this, and I don't want anyone to get angry at them for excluding mcyt. At the end of the day, it's up to them to curate what they want their poll to be, and if they don't want to deal with the toxicity that often comes with letting mcyt characters run (or if they just don't like it for whatever reason), that's their decision. Trust me- poll organizers have to put up with a lot of shit already, and I don't want to add to it, regardless of their opinions on mcyt. If any poll organizers recognize their own words in the later part of this overview, they can contact me and I'll remove it. This is also why I have chosen not to identify the blogs from which I took the examples- I mean no harm to any poll organizer. They are a symptom of a much larger problem and they haven't done anything wrong except be a little misinformed at worst.

Excluding mcyt characters from poll tournaments really isn't that big of a deal on its own- though it is frustrating- but it does speak to the larger attitude of the general tumblr population towards mcyt. While not without its flaws, this can be used as a metric to measure the extent of this attitude and maybe get a hint of why it exists.

...Please note, also, that most of these polls date back to around March-June 2023, when poll tournaments were a big thing on Tumblr. Not super outdated, but I still should note that opinions might have changed since then.

Also also, be warned that there are examples below of some organizers being pretty toxic! It's not a whole lot, but if you don't want to expose yourself to that, maybe pass on this post!

With that out of the way, let's get started.

Part One: The Numbers

The first thing I decided to do was figure out a rough percentage of how many poll tournaments have a rule that excludes mcyt characters from being submitted. To get a sample batch of poll blogs, I used one of the blogs that pits the winners of tournaments against each other and checked each blog included in that. This ended up being a more tedious process than I had thought, since there's a lot of variation in the way poll organizers, well, organize. I ended up with 123 blogs sorted into three categories.

The first category included tournaments where a rule for or against mcyt characters wouldn't really make sense, for a variety of reasons. Most commonly, the tournament was between letters of the alphabet or animo acids or government agencies, not fictional characters, so I counted them out. There were also a handful of blogs where the contestants were determined by the organizer, not by nomination at all. Combined, blogs that did not fit my criteria made up 60/123 of my samples.

The second and third categories were the blogs that either had a rule against mcyt characters, or didn't. Most of the blogs I looked through had rules I could find, and some were more thorough about it than others. For my purposes, I counted the blog as a no only if they explicitly had a rule against mcyt characters, or clarified later that they weren't allowed. Most poll blogs didn't mention mcyt at all. (This will become relevant later.)

Of the 63 blogs that fit my criteria, 11 (17.5%) of them had a rule against mcyt characters, while the remaining 52 (82.5%) did not.

To me, this seems like pretty good news! I had honestly expected the percentage of blogs that excluded mcyt to be much higher. This is definitely a good sign! But I wouldn't really jump to assuming that mcyt characters would actually be accepted in all of these blogs. I will explain this in the next part of my research.

Part Two: The Examples

The second thing I wanted to find out with this research was why organizers end up having rules against mcyt in the first place. Is it just the bad reputation the mcyt space has (largely a result of one green man in particular)? Let's look at a few examples of poll rules against mcyt characters. Some of them are from my sample blogs and some of them aren't.

Type 1: Not understanding the difference between real people and characters in mcyt

The majority of the rules against mcyt I saw were of this type, and honestly, it's pretty reasonable. It's a pretty major debate in the mcyt community over whether mcyts' characters are separate enough from their content creators to count as fictional. However, there are a considerable number of mcyt characters who are explicitly stated to be different from their cc in the same way as a character in a movie played by an actor is different from the actor playing them. Excluding all mcyt characters for being 'real people' is just incorrect, though I can kinda understand where the organizers were coming from with this one.

It should also be noted that the vast majority of poll blogs had a rule against submitting real people. There's a possibility that some poll organizers might have lumped mcyt characters as real people even if they didn't specify it explicitly. Therefore, an attempt to actually submit an mcyt character into one of these tournaments might be against the rules based on what the organizer thinks. I have no way to quantify this, which is why I said earlier that the results of my initial test might not be accurate.

Type 2: 'Problematic fandom' (toxicity warning for some of these)

This type of rule is usually broader than just mcyt, but lumps it in with other fandoms known for being associated with bigotry (often hp, which is... yeah i'm definitely not going to argue in favor of harry potter but yikes. really? we're as bad as terfy potter? really.) At least one of them let dsmp characters in with the exception of dream, which is a lot fairer than... some of the others.

If we want to give the organizers benefit of the doubt here, we can say that these rules are made to keep the poll less toxic than it would be otherwise... but to be perfectly honest, some of these might be more about that phenomenon of purity culture that has had a habit of popping up in fandom spaces since forever. That's a whole other conversation I'm not ready to have now, but it comes as no surprise to me that mcyt has become a little taboo in some places (likely to a large extent because of dream and all the drama he's generated). There's also no telling whether the poll organizers in these cases even know that there are other smps besides dsmp... but that's besides the point, since there are other dsmp characters that aren't associated with dream at all. Excluding them reveals a misconception about the mcyt genre anyway. And of course, I think we can all agree that some of these are just pretty rude.

Which brings us to our conclusion.

I feel like a lot of the toxicity towards mcyt as a genre and mcyt characters boils down to people either not really understanding what mcyt is (i.e. mcyt -> minecraft youtubers -> real people) or hearing stuff about dream and assuming the entire mcyt space is reflective of that. Of course, it's a frustrating issue that some people think this way. I think it's nice to be reminded, though, that this sort of thing isn't very widespread. Alongside the bad examples, I saw a lot of organizers confronting their preconceived notions: one organizer let in an mcyt character after admitting their 'unfamiliarity with the source material', another allowed mcyt characters 'on the condition that you can explain how they are a separate character' and a few others fiercely defended mcyt characters against toxicity in their polls. Every day we grow as a community and we can't let a few people with misguided notions of what we are keep us down. Keep watching, keep creating, and as Zedaph once said, It's okay to be silly!

[nottoofondofgaypeople]

You should make a long post about Laurance

You are so lucky I got that Vylad ask before this... Ohhh boy

Full stop, this post is probably going to be one of the longest things I post on this Nether forsaken website. Laurance has been a comfort character since I first watched this series years ago in spite of all the bull shit Jesson put him through. I have many many many thoughts on him, and none of them will be organized.

I'm fairly confident that this post will get into some very unhinged territories, I cannot be normal about this man

I feel like this should go without saying, but all of the headcanons I have dumped onto Laurance on my main blog apply to this rewrite. Including this one which you have definitely all seen, and all Shadow Knight headcanons are also canon here.

But let's talk about this rewrite specifically. Because when Laurance comes back from the Nether, and he confesses his love, the mother fucker does it! He actually gets Irena to say she at least feels something towards him! It isn't much, but she doesn't get all awkward when he says that he loves her, and she's supremely gentle with him while helping him with his recovery. This really quickly turns into romance and the two are effectively dating shortly after.

Yeah Laurance's eyes aren't magically fucking cured to perfection, that's stupid an abelist.

Actually, because I want peak recovery arc material out of this rewrite Laurance is going to get to spend a lot of time learning how to fight with this new form. His body has been pretty significantly altered from the process of undeath and also the torture. I'm so for real when I say Laurance has so many scars, just so many of them, 18 million scars all over his everything. He already had some from being a stupid fucking child, but these ones are a lot uhm... bigger.

Laurance has to adjust to the new symptoms of his body. A lot of them are slow, appearing over time. The first major thing Laurance notices is that when he stops thinking of breathing for long enough, he just stops breathing. Shadow Knights don't need to breathe, so their body doesn't naturally do it. But Laurance never fully died, so he kind of does need to breathe?? And this is just where it starts.

I think the doll symptoms start kicking in a lot slower than I initially thought of. There's still the first time that it happens, but then it doesn't happen as often. Maybe once or twice, but the next time Laurance really deals with that is during the Season 1 finale (but it isn't Garroth that knocks him out (but that's a whole post unto itself)). Going into Season 2 though, it gets worse and worse. As the Shadow King has more influence over the Overworld, the calling gets stronger and stronger.

More often than not the calling manifests as a whisper in the back of Laurance's mind, something that sends a tingle down his spine and not in a good way. His blood runs hot, and he can feel his body pulled to Irena. Like his blood is tied to her life force and constantly trying to bring her to it. And any time he's around her, that voice gets louder, starts multiplying as he fights it, all of them demanding him to kill, to do it, to free himself of the burden, to gain eternal life.

Laurance doesn't want eternal life though!! He never has!! He wants to fall in love and start a family and grow old with his partners!!

Okay so going into Laurance's childhood a bit, I've said it before and I'll say it again, Laurance is the mcd equivalent of a theater kid and yet somehow fumbled in choosing his class and ended up as a fighter instead of a bard, the goof. He picked up the Lyre when he was a teenager, mostly because his father bought one and expressed an interest in teaching Laurance how to play, and he was all over that.

He stops playing it when he goes to the guard academy cause they just don't have instruments there (which is a crime), but he does still spend a lot of time remembering songs and finger placements, mans is doing whatever he can to make sure he doesn't fall out of practice. When Laurance comes back to Meteli as an official guard he celebrates by having a party in the town and finally getting to play his beloved lyre again.

He doesn't play it as much when he's a guard, but he always tries to stay in practice. And he won't let any blindness get in the way either, his muscle memory is so on point he barely needs his eyes unless he's reading sheet music, which is usually right in front of him.

I could seriously go into a whole character analysis of comparing Laurance to Orpheus, specifically from Hadestown, like I really want to, but I'll restrain myself to just the general myth of Orpheus and Eurydice. Laurance really thought he could walk into hell and defy the gods. He really thought he could just do that. And even when he was faced with punishment, when Orpheus was forced to stay in the Underworld in her place, he endured it all for her. And actually this is so funky the roles are kind of reversed. Because Irena is the one who can't turn around to look at Laurance when they're running out of hell. If she does, she will die. That is guaranteed. Eurydice has always acted in the assurance of her survival. Unlike Orpheus in the same position, she can manage to not turn her head.

Hhhhhhg Laarmau as Orpheus and Eurydice is literally everything to me you don't understand.

And yes Laurance being Orpheus coded is why I gave him a Lyre, I won't even deny that. Like, c'mon, Laurance very earnestly trying to earn Irena's affection and saying "I also play the lyre" and Irena snarking back "A liar and a player too? I've met too many men like you." I'm--

Stay focused!! This is not the Hadestown post!!

What if Laurance was like obscenely physically affectionate? Like he's so so so physical, he loves having a point of contact with someone at all times. It doesn't have to be anything big either. He just likes wrapping his arm around Garroth's shoulder, or having Irena play with his hair. It was something important before the Shadow Knight transformation, and he only needed it more as time went on. The feeling of his lovers heartbeat reminds him he's alive.

And other people touching him reminds Laurance he still has this body. In spite of all the Shadow Kings control, he has control of his own body in this moment and he is using that control to show love and care and that matters to him more than anything. He likes holding hands, putting his hands on people, having other people do the same, even the smallest amount of affection is enough for him to selfishly crave more.

Laury likes singing a lot. His voice got a little deeper after the Shadow Knight thing because his vocal chords got just a little shredded in the Nether, but he still loves singing and singing with his friends and lovers. Laurance singing some sappy love song to Garroth who is just completely smitten, or singing some silly little campfire song to boost Cadenza's mood when she's having a bad day.

THE TABLE BIT!! I simply adore the table bit!! All of it! And it's even better in my rewrite cause even if the dialogue and the scene plays out almost exactly the same, they're in love while doing this silly bit!! Such fucking dorks I want to throw them against concrete.

Thinking about Laurance and Ungrith. Laurance finding this wyvern in the forest while exploring one day and befriending it almost instantly because Laurance is just a very kind person. Even if Ungrith isn't allowed to be with his brethren, it's okay because this weird fuckin kid is really entertaining and a genuinely great friend. I know it isn't possible but a scene where Laurance, Garroth, and their wyvern childhood friends get to hang out and talk would probably fix all my problems.

Raven doesn't literally anyone but Garroth touch him, but when Irena tells him about Ungrith, he's willing to let Laurance pet his scales or whatever you do to show affection to a flying lizard. It's not the same, but it's better than nothing.

Laurance's favorite place to kiss other people is on the cheeks, but his favorite spot to be kissed is the forehead. I think that he doesn't admit this to people, rather lets them figure it out. Both Garroth and Irena figure out Laurance likes kissing their cheeks a lot, like he does it constantly, especially because Garroth has freckles and Laurance is determined to kiss every single one of them.

Garroth is the one who learns about Laurance's affinity for forehead kisses cause he's only like two inches taller than Laurance, but that difference matters a lot to both of them. And Garroth can tell very easily from the way Laurance always loves looking up at him with those big doe eyes. Once he tells Irena this, she starts asking Laurance to bend over or kneel in front of her so she can kiss his forehead very tenderly.

Because I made Garrancemau polycule real in my rewrite, Laurance's calling latched onto Irena, but man oh man, it tempts him with Garroth sometimes. He fights so hard to protect Irena partially because if she dies by someone else's hands, he knows it'll latch onto Garroth. And sometimes the calling urges him towards it anyway, considering it'll work. A calling is best answered by the death of a lord, but the death of another guard isn't always a bad thing.

Every time Laurance runs from his lovers to fight the calling he feels so cold without them. Like if he bothers to try sleeping while on his own it just feels so cold. So empty. It doesn't feel right to try to sleep without Irena in his arms and Garroth snuggled up behind him and a blanket over the three of them.

I think Laurance cries a lot. He doesn't really have hang ups about showing his emotional side until he's a shadow knight, and even after, he only tries to hide his anger. He never hides his anguish, his sadness, his absolute misery as a result of the nightmare he was forced to live through. Laurance's crying is so loud, so wretched, almost agonizing for him. It forces his entire body to shake and tremble, sobs being wrung out of him almost forcefully.

I want. him. to be okay. and happy. and I know he won't be. Aughfhhg.

[kindlespice]

🍉 actual hiatus 🍉

hi hi! so... it's been a while! *checks notes* i have not posted since august... of last year x.x i've been lurking around a bit occasionally dropping likes here and there, but for the most part been entirely absent. i feel like it's wayyyy past time for me to check-in, let everybody know i'm okay and all that jazz. but i am declaring this an actual hiatus now

tl;dr

i lost the simblr itch, i thought "surely it will come back" but it never came back and now i'm hyperfixating on other things.

i'm gonna put specifics under a read more if anyone's that interested in what i've been doing, what i will be doing, where i'll be hanging out now, etc. but it's really nothing big or major--just interests changing.

⭐ my content + patreon

(since it's kinda important and i want everyone to be able to see this) i'm not deleting this account and i'm still keeping my content up both on patreon and sfs! you will still be able to download things for free!!! i will be deleting my patreon tier! even though it was basically a donation tier, i feel bad keeping it up knowing i'm consciously not making more sims content (or being really active in the community) for the foreseeable future i'll be reaching out to existing patrons and making a similar post over there as well about the tier change!

i also wanna say thank you to everyone who's ever followed, donated, liked, commented, messaged, lurked or just been sweet and kind to me ❤️! simblr will always have a special place in my heart, so i don't think i'll ever leave leave, but i owe it to you guys to let you know that i'm making the conscious decision to be inactive for some time.

as a closing statement, fk isr*el and i am absolutely 100% without a doubt full stop

AGAINST GENOCIDE AND FOR A 🍉 FREE PALESTINE 🍉

you should be too if you're any kind of decent human being :)

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

⭐what will happen to my account?

nothing really. or at least nothing different from how it's been for the last year and some change XD like i said, i'm still keeping my blogs up, downloads won't move, etc. i am just committing to not actively posting content or really being on simblr that much. maybe i'll drop some likes or comments when the mood hits (like i have been), but not really much else. i guess if there's any questions about this i'll answer them since my active attention will be back on simblr for at least a few days while i clean some things up. i would like to do one last thing as a kind of parting gift at some point... i never did end up cleaning up my downloads page or organize the thumbs/sorting for my cc like i said i would so maybe i'll do that before it gets away from me again but i'm not making any promises

⭐why am i on hiatus?

nothing bad happened or anything, i just.... lost interest. I already wasn't really playing the game that much even when i was super active; i mostly just took pictures and did edits. but i just wasn't having as much fun as i used to, opening the game started feeling like a chore, i wasn't all that inspired to make content, etc. i've burnt out on simblr on many an occasion so i just took a break like i always do but it kept going...and going.......and going.........until i realized it had been FOREVER and i hadn't really felt the itch to create here during that time, it wasn't coming back, and i was having much more fun doing other stuff. the times i did consider coming back it was more bc i felt bad about not creating rather than any actual desire to create. so i had to think long and hard about whether or not i even really wanted to come back. and i flip-flopped for probably 6 months--trying to drum up creative projects and never committing--before coming to the conclusion that i think i just need to call it a hiatus XD

⭐what have i been up to?

annoying my family with boycott lists and making them buy alternatively :D bouncing back and forth between many different hyperfixations... i fell back down the skyrim rabbithole several times, genshin, stardew, acnh, made a million notion pages i'll never use--the usual suspects. BUT BG3! at one point i swore i was gonna come back end of july/early aug but then BG3 dropped early and it was over... i definitely did A LOT of heavy lurking here when the girlies were all posting GORGEOUS tavs omg... i spent a while getting ts3 up and running, even made a sideblog thinking "maybe i'll come back with ts3 content that would be cool!"... just to not end up playing and not using the sideblog and not coming back -.- 4LIENS were supposed to have a comeback like... 4 separate times and it just did not happen... i've been making a concerted effort to get back into drawing and art. i've been in a kind of... depression? slump? with it for years now; always feeling like it wasn't good enough, that i should be better since i'm so "gifted and talented", i should be monetizing it and not "wasting" all that skill, blah blah imposter syndrome blah blah getting frustrated when i'm not 100% perfect all the time blah blah feeling like a disappointment to my family blah blah... but i am HELLA sick and tired of having all this anxiety and fear surrounding something i used to love so much so i'm pushing through! i've been trying out lots of different mediums and actually using my sketchbooks and just generally trying to introduce more fun into the process and stop being so hard on myself all the time. i picked up crocheting for a bit. at this point i haven't touched it in so long i probably forgot how to do it but... maybe one day i'll make a blanket or smth I started journalling (relatively) regularly for a bit. i was feeling really down at several points throughout the year and i thought having daily entries would help combat the feeling like every day was just absolute shit. on the contrary, the majority of days are good--at worst mundane--the bad ones just tend to stick out more. trying to get back into reading again... i miss doing it for leisure and taking notes bc i want to and not because i have a 300 annotation school assignment :P and a whole bunch of other stuff probably but it's hard to remember every single thing that's been on my mind for 16 months lol

⭐what will i be doing / where can you find me now?

i'm hoping to start a webtoon/build up art socials in the new year as a part of my "reconnecting to art" process. i made some art socials @kbearie-art here and @/kbearie_art on insta, youtube, tiktok, and twitter; they're empty for now though bc i got scared the minute i made them and never posted anything -.- but i'll be real with you... twitter is a cesspool, and im not fond of tiktok so i think tumblr, insta and youtube will probably be where i'll dedicate my time i've been thinking about getting back into posting videos on youtube again just in general. in fact this thought was the final push for me to make this post bc i was like... if i post a video out of the blue with no word to simblr that would be fked up XD i play games all the time and i had such a fun time recording, learning to edit and stuff that i think i'd like to pursue that further. i wouldn't be doing sims related stuff though bc...well... i don't play anymore XD but other games ya know. my other youtube is kspice (the same place with my tutorials, speed edits, the acnh vid, etc.) if you'd be interested in that

and i guess that's pretty much it!

again, for at least the next couple of days i'll probably actively have my eyes on this post/simblr in general (and i am gonna clear out my inbox hopefully) so if you have questions i'd ask em quickly before i go back into hiding XD

thanks again, i love you guys, free palestine, and have a good new year! 🍉⭐💖

[otherhearted-culture-is]

Otherhearted FAQ

Thought I'd put together a post to address some of the questions I've gotten multiple times over the course of running this blog, so here is that. (This does not mean I will be ignoring questions like this when they come in! Just that there is now a faster way for people to get answers to these questions.)

-

Q: Is it possible to be 'hearted with [X]?

A: This is usually asked by folks who are questioning whatever [X] happens to be. In general, the answer to "is it possible to experience the thing I am experiencing?" is going to be yes, since, well... you are experiencing it, are you not?

But to be a bit more specific, I will address the categories that people most frequently ask about in this way. Yes, your hearttype absolutely can be: -A non-animal organism (plants, fungus, etc.) -A fictional character or species -An object -A concept or process (emotions, colors, songs, types of weather, etc. etc.)

-

Q: Can hearttypes be voluntary/chosen?

A: Yes. Hearttypes can be either voluntary or involuntary.

-

Q: Can your connection with your hearttype fluctuate?

A: Yes! This is common in most alterhuman identities, including otherheartedness.

-

Q: How can I tell if I am otherhearted?

A: Unfortunately, there is no one perfect check you can do that will instantly tell you. (If only identity were that easy, right?) It requires self-reflection. Questioning is different for everyone and there isn't a right or wrong way to go about it, but if you are looking for a solid starting point, I recommend having a look at Corv's otherhearted questioning guide. And remember: it is okay to take your time, it is okay to come to a conclusion quickly, it is okay to experiment, and it is okay if you end up being wrong. You do not owe anyone anything.

-

Q: Do otherhearted people experience shifts?

A: We can, but that is not a requirement for being otherhearted!

I once ran a poll to determine what % of otherhearted folks get phantom shifts in particular. (Maybe sometime I should do another one for other types of shifts?)

Anyway, according to those results, about 2/3rds of us experience phantom shifts related to our hearttypes. The poll only had 143 votes so I wouldn't take the exact numbers too seriously, but I think it is at least fair to say that 'hearted shifts are not a rare phenomenon. (If anyone is aware of data on this with a bigger sample size, please let me know!)

[friendlylocalwhumper]

Hey there whump-fellow! I was wondering if you might help me out a bit. I'm writing an original superhero story for Camp NaNo this year and I want the main character's superpower to come with whumpy side-effects, but I am having a hard time coming up with anything even slightly original in that regard. Do you have any suggestions or examples I might play off of? Also, I am going to ask around to a few whump blogs to cast a wider net! Any suggestions as to whom I should ask?

Telekinesis/mind reading with a side effect of migraines. Agony, sensitivity to light/noise. Days-long pain after just using their powers once, which causes the pavlovian response of an awful headache starting up just at the thought of using their powers.

Fire powers that leave burns, thick scars that hurt less and less the more the powers are used but the nerves die more and more, meaning that the whumpee loses feeling in their fingers, then hands, then arms. They will miss out on feeling gentle breezes, soft blankets, holding hands with a friend.

Ice powers that cause frostbite. They can put out a fire, stop an enemy instantly, catch someone who is falling before they die… but the pain afterward is intense, and they always have to weigh the benefits of saving lives versus potentially losing a part of their own body. Or their powers give frostbite to anyone that the ice touches!

Invincibility that lasts for as long as it’s being used, but after the battle is over, in safety, all the damage hits at once. Bruises bloom in purples and blues, cuts spring forth and leave the whumpee scrambling to apply pressure and soak up too much blood before they pass out.

Invisibility/phasing that is strategically useful because the whumpee can sneak or pass through obstacles, but it makes their body have too loose a grasp on reality and their loved ones lose memories of them. They may be able to sneak into a dangerous place and get out unharmed, but their mother or partner will now struggle to recall their name.

A superpower that was desperately wished for in an hour of need, but now every time that it’s used, something precious has to be sacrificed. For the power to be used, an hierloom has to be chosen to disappear from existence, or a limb has to be chosen to never work without pain again, or a comforting memory has to be forgotten. Eventually this would leave the whumpee tougher, less sensitive to loss, but they would also have so much less comfort to come home to. This power would work great as a “gift” from a deity, fae, supernatural creature, or a naively summoned ghost.

Villain-turned-hero who used to use their powers for evil, but now that they are fighting for good, their powers keep trying to turn on them. They used to melt guards’ weapons and locks off vaults, but now that they try to melt doors shut to keep out storms or villains, the molten metal sputters and hits their skin. Or they used to make their nemesis’ armor, tools, or on their most evil day, that nemesis’ most cherished friend disappear; but now after a long hard day of protecting people, when they come home, they find that their partner is missing. They find that their car keys are gone, their fridge, their shoes. Sometimes it is a small thing they won’t even miss, and sometimes it is something so devastating to lose that they fall to their knees and sob.

The superpower of being able to compel that the truth be given after they ask a question. Very useful for a detective, a hero in a corrupt society littered with propaganda, a spy trying to work their way up in an evil organization. But if they ask a question that someone doesn’t know the answer to, it can drive that person mad. If they ask a question someone would rather die than answer, they will give the truth but then be emotionally broken from admitting that aloud. If that person would rather kill than answer…

Any power which has no direct side effects immediately after use, but which is forbidden or horrifying for some reason. Maybe it is the power to bring the dead back to life for just long enough to answer questions, which is morally complicated. Maybe it’s the power to cause intense agony without leaving physical marks. Maybe it’s the ability to travel through time, which causes alternate universes to sprout up and can cause mass deaths, confusion, or chaos in the future. Whatever the power is, it has to be used for some reason, and hiding its use and its consequences leaves the hero afraid, unable to trust anyone, and devastatingly ashamed. This could lead to angsty confessions, betrayal, abandonment, a public execution, banishment, etc.

A very subtle, pleasant power that is embarassingly weak in a time when more power is needed. the ability to numb pain, which feels useless during war when people are bleeding out and losing friends. the ability to see the future in a time when everyone knows what the horrifying outcome will be and no one can stop it. the ability to stop time, but not to move or change what is happening, which just leaves the hero stuck to think, to rely on their own mind to try to solve a terrible problem while seeing everyone frozen in a moment of pain or fear.

I’m not sure about other whump blogs you could ask, but anyone who sees this post is totally welcome to add ideas! The side effects of the superpower don’t have to be direct or ironic, so any random idea could be perfect for the story! No idea is bad!

[fishyfishyfishtimes]

hi it's mermay and i'm thinking about sirens. i'm gunna do some looking of my own (at seadragons, probably) but can you think of any fish that look like their tails/features would make a cool mermaid?

Hello! I've actually answered a similar question before, here is my answer to that one:

But since your question is a little different, I'll feature some unique fish species you could find inspiration from!

The rockmover wrasse! Here is an adult, the juvenile is a little wilder:

Crazy patterns! Should go to good use :)

Eels! Just any type of eel, really. They come in such varied shapes and sizes, and have various abilities too! If you're the type of person who likes to give merpeople the features of the fish they're based on, just imagine a moray eel merperson with two jaws! Or a ribbon eel merson whose tail sways like a ribbon while swimming. I'd suggest looking into eels!

Electric eels too! Despite the name, they aren't actually eels at all, so I'm mentioning their genus separately here. Long fish that sense things with electricity and can generate it, even being able to cause prey animals to stop or start swimming with careful shocks... need I say more?

Here's one that could have many ways to be interpreted as a merson. Stargazers! They're ambush predators that hide in the sand, only having their eyes and mouth showing. I'd like to see how those would be interpreted as merpeople.

Mudskippers! The semiaquatic fish that live most of their lives on land.

Another one that walks, frogfish! Many species not only have a lure, but also walk along the bottom of the seafloor. How's that for an interesting merson challenge?

I don't think I've ever seen a merson who looks like a billfish, as in like a swordfish, sailfish or a marlin. The particular fish here is a sailfish!

I don't see some reef fish often, either. How about a moorish idol?

Perhaps the similarly-shaped butterflyfish?

Oh hey, maybe mandarinfish! That's one colourful guy :)

Deep sea fish are always a treat, too. They look very otherworldly compared to the fish we see often in everyday life! My personal favourite is the barreleye, but any friend from the deep is a friend indeed. The stoplight loosejaw who has a private red flashlight, the cookiecutter shark who sneakily bites chunks off bigger animals, bristlemouths with their large jaws and tiny teeth... I recommend looking into fish that have photophores, aka light-producing organs! They're fish that glow in the dark!!! Extremely cool and mysterious...

Lanternfish are a good example of this, I think. They're thought to be the most abundant group of vertebrates, they're deep sea-living, they have photophores, they migrate vertically in humongous schools that literally look like false bottoms to sonar.

Deep sea anglerfish are a classic, old but gold. Seldom used in merfolk! I've tried tackling anglerfish merfolk myself before, I'll feature my concept sketches below for possible inspiration... though they contain artistic nudity, so I'll only feature them under the cut.

And there you have it! I got kinda carried away, I'm sure no one minds. Have a fun Mermay! I'm gonna draw some art for it myself, but in the meantime, have this fish ramble :)

Once again, artistic nudity under the cut. Just some cartoon tits. Completely nonrealistic nonoffensive unreal cartoon bazookas, just wanna put them away from a direct line of sight because my blog isn't for art most of the time.

Her first initial concept on the left and some additional ones on the right. Anglerfish of all kinds use lures to trick prey, so I wanted to mix the lure aspect with mermaids to create a siren that lures in sailors with her human half and eats them with her fish half. The human half has working eyes, vocal chords and lungs to first spot sailors, then call and sing to them, but besides that all the other organs are in the fish half. No doubt similar merple exist, but this was my take on it! It's a lot of fun to be creative, I recommend just going with the flow and doing what feels the most natural or coolest. You've got this!

[uncertainfuture2]

May 4, 2024 - Central Daylight Time

6:25AM - Just for funzies, I am going to try a different structure to this blog post. I am going to continually add to this post throughout the day with time-stamped updates. Check back throughout the day.

Planning to make today a productive day. Just waking up and planning to drive into the office to get a backlog of work done.

7:29AM - Got out of bed. Thought I looked cute this morning:

Took my supplements, completed hygiene. Gathered all the dirty laundry. As of now, 1st load is in the dryer, 2nd load is in the washer. Unloaded the dishwasher, made sure cat has clean water, broke down soda cans for recycling....

8:34AM - Retrieved my car from the L2 charger, took recycling to the drop off site...

9:52AM - Grocery run + cat supplies and then I let myself get pulled into a nerd tangent on Discord (I'm pink)...

10:12AM - Starting to feel late in the morning... I should head out... but then hunger pang hit. Haven't eaten anything yet. Cooking will take time.. bowl of cereal and pick up pizza on the way in?... milk went bad. Fuck.... making pasta. I can clean while cooking...

10:46AM - Folded and put away all the laundry from earlier. Ate. ... Presently debating whether to actually drive all the way into the office (I am more productive and easier to focus there) or try to work from home on my laptop (will not need to spend time driving and potentially more time working?) ...

Remember I told the local boi that I would go walking with him at 5pm.. that's 6ish hours away... if I zap 2 hours for commute, that's only 4 hours of work and not worth it... Should I cancel plans? Oh, 🤦🏼‍♀️ I have a blog post about him from last month that's still in the drafts and I should finish that and update... I should go back and add links to other posts...

10:58AM - Ok... maybe if I take my laptop into the craft room where the actual desk is....

Oh. Right. I need to actually organize all this shit.. (this room also acts as a sort of storage room for stuff that doesn't go anywhere else; it is the designated chaos zone)

12:09PM - Installed new self-groomer for the cat

And I had gotten him a new cat box with a sifter pan and a lid ... got the new one set up and hoping he will switch over without a fuss. Tired of litter all over the bathroom floor (I sweep daily)

12:59PM - Started clearing through some of the mess in the craft room. Put all the cables back in their drawer. Went through the stack of assorted 'important' documents and mail on the desk. So I can get some clear workspace... Cat started trying to get my attention; grabbed a cat toy and played with him for a bit...

2:00PM - Ended up cleaning out the shower/tub, toilet... started another, smaller load of laundry for the bath mat and cleaning rags... Finally got my laptops set up in the craft room... But now I'm hungry again 🙃

2:41PM - Decided I have leftover chana masala in the fridge and I will make that. So, making rice... and opted to add some quinoa to it because why not? And then ran to the Indian grocery for naan and kaju katli because why not?

4:00PM - 😳😅 I, uh.... let myself get caught up in tumblr chats and fapping. Um.... 😅

6:47PM - Just getting home after going for a walk and out to get ice cream/ shaved ice with the local boi. Had a good time...

11:11PM - Fell asleep. I don't even know when. Woke up a few minutes ago... evidently fell asleep before 8:24. Had an unread message from a friend with that time stamp....

And evidently none of what I intended to do today actually got done 🤦🏼‍♀️

[quinloki]

"I think that's a great fic idea" good news, it is, or something very similar. Inspiration is very clearly taken from @/turtletaubwrites series Numbers Game. The reader is a financial advisor who worked for Buggy, who then ends up under Croc and Mihawk because Buggy gets in trouble for ignoring her advice and fucking up the financials. Not trying to start anything, I don't think it's stealing to riff on smth but people should maybe be a bit more up front abt where they take inspiration from. At least give the OG a shout out lol

This is one of those things where there’s not an easy cut and dry answer I can give you or agree with, and I’m going to do my best to lay out why that is.

Is it possible the idea came from the person you’re referencing, but looking at the interactions for the first chapter I don’t see Alexa anywhere, not in the likes or comments.

I don’t even see anyone I follow in there either - which is to say that fandoms are HUGE and we don’t actually all know one another. (And that’s not to say there isn’t overlap in moots, just not with that particular story.)

Now, it’s possible there’s proof somewhere, but my point is that it is statistically just as possible that it’s just a similar idea. I wrote Quicksand’s reader as being a good office worker and coordinator - they weren’t specifically the accountant, but that could also be where the idea came from.

Reader being a competent and useful person makes sense when you’re talking about the Cross Guild. Neither Crocodile nor Mihawk are particularly patient people, and Buggy is enough frustration/comedic relief on his own.

If I shouted out to everyone who had inspired every part of what I write I’d hit tumblr’s post character limit before I got to the story itself. There’s a balance in there somewhere but it can honestly be case by case.

Despite your claim of not trying to start something it very much feels like you are, and while I appreciate you wanting to see credit given where it’s due, inspiration is so interwoven and complex, it’s hard to say exactly where an idea comes from for someone. So I’m going to assume that the vibes are unintentional - I’m sure you very much mean well. (If clarification is needed I’m not experiencing any negative emotions as I say this. I’m worried the vibes are there, but I will believe they were not meant.)

Heck, I had a story idea for a Eustass kid story I was (still am) excited about and when I shared it with my friends someone mentioned it was similar to something Mombat on Wattpad had wrote. And they’re right! The setup of the reader was similar - but I didn’t scrap the story idea because the story itself is going to be different.

And I know it is gonna be different, cause I had read that story by Mombat with my own eyes! And honestly it’s very likely where the inspiration sparked, even though I didn’t consciously make the connection until someone said something.

But there’s bound to be a lot of similar ideas in a singular fandom, because we’re all working with the same source material.

Now, I appreciate the intent, cause we all wanna look out for one another and such, but calling out possible sources of inspiration is maybe a bit much. Though I will say if there’s a dozen points of commonality, then it’s probably worth the mention.

here’s a bit of food for thought - Eustass Kid calling the reader Mouse is something I’m fairly well known for, and it wasn’t even my idea - and the friend I picked it up from had picked it up from someone else. Kaku calls reader Filly in most my one-shots but that’s from another friend. Penguin and Shachi calling reader lil’ Shoal was all my idea, but also I wouldn’t be surprised if someone else thought it up too.

Now, my long and exhausting reply aside, I do want to thank you for putting turtleaub on my radar. Her writing looks wonderful and I love how organized the blog and posts are. I am delighted to have something new to read even if my to read list is painfully long already. And there’s a possibility of making a new friend somewhere in there too \o/

[ask-squip-hq]

(( Thought I'd put together a little something to give some reference points to new folk around here! There's a full transcription below the readmore; now get out there, be respectful, and have some fun. Cheers! ))

Slide 1: RP TIPS CRASH COURSE!

Hello all! Given the recent spike of fresh activity around here, I wanted to give a few pointers & help make sure that everybody's on the same page.

Slide 2: First and foremost:

A concrete distinction between Mun (the person writing) and Muse (the character being written) is very important!

Your audience and writing partners are gonna wanna know whether a response is in character or not--if it isn't very clear, things can get a little confusing to read.

For example, I keep in-universe HRTech content contained within its own blog separate from my main--this helps keep things organized as well! And when I want to break the fourth wall, I refer to myself as the crew.

Slide 3: When writing with Strangers:

Always ask permission!

It's common practice to plan things behind the scenes with your friends--I do it all the time! But when it comes to other people you might be interacting with, you're going to want to make sure they're on the same page too.

As a general rule of thumb: if you want to involve someone else's character in a plot point or scene of your own, that character's writer needs to be a part of the planning process!

Slide 4: When writing with Strangers:

Having an askblog gives a writer the ability to easily choose what they want to respond to--no one's obligated to respond to anything after all, whether it meshes with their plans, or maybe they just don't feel like it. Who knows! It's just for fun at the end of the day.

While an in-character response doesn't necessarily count as permission from the writer to involve them in other narratives, you can always make an offer out-of-character; or send more asks!

Slide 5: Give and Take:

If you spot a blog doing something you think is cool or interesting, you can help them out by sending an ask about it! Don't worry, it doesn't need to be plot-driven, or even in character--you can ask what's going on, give a suggestion to a character, or even just prompt them for their favorite foods.

It's encouraging and exciting for writers; it shows them that people are interested in the stories they want to tell! When everybody is engaging with each other, everything becomes a lot more fun.

Slide 6: Ask etiquette:

Stuff you'll want to avoid:

-Sending unsolicited sensitive content; stuff like NSFW, gore, invasive questions, personal details, and venting should be avoided at all costs--an rp blog is not the place!

-Spamming; don't send messages to somebody over and over again, especially if they aren't responding to the first one!

-Introducing unrelated or sudden plot elements; collaboration is fun, but works best with planning--you wouldn't want to overshadow someone's story with yours on their own blog!

Slide 7: TLDR;

>Label in-character content for clarity

>Invite every relevant party to planning stages

>Engage with others and they'll do the same

>Keep troubling content out of shared creative spaces

Remember: when in doubt, you can always ask!

[helen-renee]

New to the blog and loving all of your art!! I’ve been on a comic/superhero kick lately and saw your amazing neopoltian trio hybrid super Au art from way back— do you still have your notes on it?? I would love to know more!

Oh wow, I haven't thought about that AU in a While! I definitely still have some of my notes, but most of them are in my head so all the physical notes are backstory and the first few planned chapters of the fic I was writing 😅

I put so much thought into the worldbuilding and plot of that au, maybe I should revisit it at some point...

Anyways, I'll just copy-paste all my notes below the line for you for now! If you have questions I'll happily answer, whether it's about the characters or the plot or the worldbuilding, I have it all in my head!

Setting: 

Basic world lore is that the nether and end realms merged with the overworld(less the end, more the nether) and people started being born with ‘mob’ attributes. It’s semi post apocalyptic, the cities are surrounded by walls attack on titan style and outside the walls are the mobs. The further out you get the more dangerous they are. There are multiple cities and they’re all fairly modern. There are heroes and villains, don’t know how they started yet.

Prologue: Memories of a lost homeland, hope of a promised land.

When the Nether and End spilled into the overworld, so did many other things. Mobs, magic, wildlife, plants. And among those beings was a Virus. Created by the magic of the End and the Nether colliding was a Virus to the world. It started as a sprout in the center of the wastelands, but it grew, attaching itself to travelers and animals, looking for the best host.  

ACT 1: The pact of our Youth

Tommy was kidnapped by an illegal organization when he was three, he’s (thought to be)an avian hybrid. He’s roomed with Dream(063.D), who’s around ten at that point, and after Dream gets attached he’s used as collateral so Dream cooperates with the organization’s plans.

Dream is given the resources to teach Tommy as rewards for achievements in training, and since Dream wasn’t always in the organization’s ‘care’ he taught Tommy about the outside world. Dream learned not to go against the organization years before Tommy showed up, so he taught Tommy to be neutral to the scientists. 

Dream and Tommy didn’t use names when others could hear, at first it was a way for Dream to try to keep himself distant from Tommy but later it became a habit. Tommy often just called him ‘Green’ around the scientists because he’d compared his eyes to the color when Tommy had been learning, while Tommy was just ‘Star’ because he’d loved stories of the stars. They only called each other by name when they knew they were alone.

Dream is basically Tommy’s only positive attachment until he’s eight, when Dream is sent to work his way up the ranks of the heroes. (Dream is 15 at this point).

Dream leaves willingly, only because the organization promised he and Tommy would be free the moment they get what they want.

Tommy is then roomed with Wilbur and Technoblade, twelve year old Piglin hybrid twins who were recently brought in. Techno has the more obvious Piglin traits, he’s physically stronger, has tusks, and has bright pink hair, while Wilbur is only slightly above average strength wise, has burgundy hair, and is more aggressive to ‘outsiders’. 

Tommy is initially wary of the twins, especially since his first interaction with them was Wilbur and Techno trying to attack the scientists as they were brought back to their room, but he slowly becomes curious about why they kept fighting. Eventually, after Wilbur is taken for testing, Tommy asks why they keep fighting. Techno tells him that they don’t belong there. When Tommy asks where they do belong, Techno says ‘Anywhere, as long as we’re together and free.’

There are a few time skips with flashes of Tommy, Techno and Wilbur bonding, Tommy never tells them his real names so Techno names him Theseus, Wilbur and Tommy coming up with stories about creating a nation(called ‘Vienna’, since Wilbur vaguely remembers the name from records of the world before.), Wilbur and Techno noticing that Tommy’s wings are growing gold feathers.

When Tommy is ten and Wilbur and Techno are fourteen, they make plans to escape and, eventually, they do. 

ACT 2: hurt and grieve (but don’t suffer alone)

They’re on the streets for two weeks before Wilbur is injured and uses himself as a distraction for Tommy and Techno to escape. A few weeks after that Techno does the same, leaving Tommy alone.

Tommy is by himself for the next few months, until he meets Tubbo, a normal, if neglected, Ram hybrid kid his age. Tubbo hides Tommy in his room during the nights and they play at the park during the days until Tubbo’s parents find Tommy in Tubbos room. They decide to call the police the next day. However Tubbo decides that he’d rather be on the streets with Tommy then at home, alone without him and they run away together that night. 

They’re both twelve by the time they’re able to afford a tiny, very much illegal, apartment. Tubbo had made some (somewhat accidental) connections with a trio of Vigilantes during their time on the streets (It’s Aimsey, Billzo, and Freddie because I couldn’t help it) by helping an injured Aimsey. Once Tommy realizes Vigilantes actually exist he starts planning to become one and take down the organization. 

While all of this has been happening:

Wilbur and Techno were back with the organization, separated and under higher security. They knew the other was there but not how they were. After months of this there was a Hero Raid.

Techno was found by Philza, the no.1 hero, and he refused to go with them, fighting to find Wilbur. Philza went after him and eventually found Techno hugging Wilbur in a training room. Wilbur refused to let Philza near them until Techno convinced him to relax. 

Techno and Wilbur didn’t trust anyone except Philza, and tried to run away from police custody multiple times to find Tommy. It wasn’t until Philza visited again and promised to look for Tommy that they calmed down. Philza got custody of them and they insisted on joining the Hero training program. 

When Philza goes to tell the other heroes to keep an eye out for Tommy he’s pulled aside by Dream, a up-and-coming Hero who’s rising through the ranks rapidly. Dream tells him that the Hero commission is corrupt and that telling them would put Tommy in danger, insisting that he knows Tommy’s safe. 

Back with Tommy:

They end up hacking into police records and find notes of a hero raid on an unknown illegal experimentation operation. They obviously decide to join in. In the chaos Tommy finds Ranboo hiding in a room deep in the building, away from the Heros and Scientists. Ranboo insists that he can’t be found by the Heros and, after Tubbo meets up with them, Tommy agrees to bring him with them and they escape the (now burning) building. 

Wilbur was one of the heroes helping evacuate the area and he sees Tommy leaving with Ranboo and Tubbo, he recognises Tommy’s hair and Tommy’s wings look gold because of the fire. He calls for Theseus and Tommy turns back to look at him before disappearing in the crowds.

ACT 3: 

Years later, Tommy and Tubbo are 16, Ranboo is 17, they’re all vigilantes.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/33003292

(That's all the notes I have specifically written out for plot for now, but I wrote a few chapters of a fic for this AU before I got too busy to write. I linked it there.)

Ages throughout the story:

Tommy: 3-8 when he’s with Dream, 8-10 with Wil and Techno, 10-12 on the streets and with Tubbo, 12-16 with Ranboo and Tubbo 

Dream: 10-15 when he’s taking care of Tommy and being trained, 15-19 training as a hero to talking to Philza, 19-23 fully fledged hero

Wilbur and Techno: 12-14 with Tommy, 14-16 being saved to starting basic hero training, 16-20 looking for Tommy and becoming fully fledged heroes. 

Philza: Old (/j, probably around 28 when he meets Wil and Techno

Powers/Hybrid traits:

Tommy:

Thought to be an Avian (a hybrid with permanent bird-like traits) but later realizes that he can hide his Hybrid attributes, making him Elytrian. 

I haven’t actually decided his power yet haha

Techno:

A Piglin Hybrid, has enhanced physical strength, tusks, and pink hair. 

His power is to manipulate Gold, shaping it into whatever he needs. He discovered it when he was on the run with Tommy, stealing a gold ring as a last-minute weapon. Once he becomes a hero he wears multiple pieces of gold jewelry and his trident is made of solid gold.

Wilbur:

A Piglin Hybrid, has slightly enhanced strength, burgundy hair, and is more aggressive and possessive than the average person.

His power is sound manipulation, using high frequencies to disorientate people and corrupt enemy frequencies. (I was thinking of giving it a physical effect as well but idk what)

Philza:

An Elytrian Hybrid, has the typical Avian attributes but is able to ‘de-summon’ them at will.

I had way more stuff for worldbuilding but I got a new phone and the transfer deleted the app it was written in 😔

I do, however, have playlists for all the characters where the songs follow their full personal plot in the story. Granted, y'all wouldn't understand most of it, since you don't know the plot, but still, they exist😅

[the-glorious-evolution-fanart]

what do you think about the convergence designs?

Hey there Anon, my general thoughts I mentioned on my general art blog: https://www.tumblr.com/ikleyvey/721851451454980096/what-do-you-think-about-the-face-reveal-of-viktor?source=share

In more detail:

I downloaded and saved all parts of the Convergence, I really like comics and I value this one as well. I like the colours especially I think.

I love them, I want a bunch of content with them they're so dear to me! But we're not here for beauty. We're here for darkness.

I think we should all have expected bullshit technology that definitely cannot work. Like when sci-fi works slap "quantum" onto anything and think it makes it sound cool and science-y.

No, a severed head bolted onto a thin metal neck connected to the body is not going to be able to live. Riot, stop with putting mechanical parts between organic ones. Stop it. Bad Riot. Just like they wrote in a story about Zaun a woman with mechanical elbows. Her lower arms would rot away!! This is very logical!! And excuses such as "this is fantasy" don't work because the tech level doesn't match super sci-fi. And even in super sci-fi nobody would make such designs because they're impractical.

Their designs do not fit Viktor's aesthetic at all. They're much more like quickly pulled from Warhammer 40K Mechanicus, and not even that.

Case in point, all designs are not thought-through much. It's first draft stuff.

What are these augments?? What are these legs?? Triple faces and spindly arms? No, I want to base my stuff on real stuff...

I heard tracing maybe(?) helps speed things up, and commissioned comics are so often on very tight deadlines and not paid well, thankfully I'm not forced to trace.

We do not need another Dr. Doom copied element. Believe me. Not another one. I don't agree with Viktor having a scarred face, that's Dr. Doom's thing. Riot is using this as a cop-out. It's much better to have him use the mask as a symbol of his ideology, and a metaphor for him hiding his vulnerability in a very obvious way. THIS is why he's physically "perfect" in my version because that characteristic I believe enhances his main traits.

So is he WideViktor, or is he the skinny sickly Viktor from Arcane? Nobody knows, the authors don't know, and I'm sure as hell Riot didn't give clear instructions on that either lolol

^ Best Viktor art bits in the comic imo, even if I don't like the new mask design. (original mask ftw!)

I don't want to dunk on other artists, but movement and anatomy can be improved. Heck, my anatomy needs to be improved as well! But if problems are noticeable in our art, then they definitely should be improved. I mean this as positive encouragement so that art would be even better. (Also lol did they paint my character in pink? I joke)

It was HILARIOUS to watch official content regurgitate what I identified and portrayed as incorrect and very simplistic interpretation of lore back in two-thousand-fucking-fourteen:

I was like 19 or something, never had a single job in my life, had gotten only one commission by then, I was a literal 0. But I always say, believe me when I point out something. BELIEVE ME. Very few people do. And what happens? I end up being right! I'm always happy to talk about stuff though.

I'll make a companion piece to this post specifically about the NARRATIVE of the Convergence comic. Also if anyone wants my opinion on a specific frame from the Convergence comic, send it to me I have open submissions!

[beauty-and-passion]

Just wanted to say that I've been a long-time fan of yours, since before PoF, and your analyses were some of the most well-thought out, nuanced and well-researched pieces on the site (my favorites are the playlist analyses they're like my comfort ones lmao). Even tho I've drifted away from the fandom, I still check back in here every now and again to see what's going on. Whilst I love ur series, I do think it's sad you've had to give urself that closure, which is one of my biggest hang-ups with this series. This painful, slow decline where SaSi drags on and on, losing all its momentum & fans and ending with a quiet sizzle rather than a bang as it should, is the worst way to end a series that touched so many people, including me. Tbh, if Thomas is going to use his ever-patient SaSi fans to milk views and money for his other series, he owes it to them to at least finish it properly. He owes his fans a lot of things, and a S2 finale is the main one, you can't milk SaSi for views and not create an episode for 2 years, you can't have your cake and eat it too. Don't want to do it anymore? Cut it, end it, so people can finally move on. The decline of SaSi has been one of the saddest things to witness, but I'm glad you're branching out into other things (tbh kudos for making it this long) and I'll stick around anyway even if ur analyses aren't SaSi because I don't read them for the content, but for the captivating way you write :)

Oh no, compliments! My only weakness!

But seriously, it's beautiful to feel so appreciated and I thank you a lot for that. I am glad you enjoy my analyses so much and it makes me very happy to know they have a good use. If they can help someone feel better, then I will keep writing them until the end of time - no, you can't take back your words now, they will come and be stupidly long because I love to ramble about stuff I like :P

Your words about SaSi are perfectly understandable and I agree with everything you say. It's really a shame that this series is slowly declining and it probably won’t end up like a bang, as it deserved.

Sure, Thomas explained a lot of things and it's now a bit clearer why this happened. However, this doesn't take away from the fact that the organization is pitiful and the lack of communication shouldn't have happened at all, not in a competent team. There are definitely issues and I hope Thomas will work on them as soon as possible, because they can affect his future projects too.

I felt we were going in this direction and I was growing frustrated. So, I did what I do every time there is something I don't like: I try to fix it, even if just for myself. And that's what I did with FSS3. I wanted to see these threads close in a satisfying way, I wanted to see the themes I care about being developed as they deserve. I wanted to give these characters a mature development, because I deeply love them and I deeply love the concept and the possibilities of Sanders Sides.

So, I put my ideas down - with the help of all the people who contributed to the survey. And now, I feel much more satisfied. I know FSS3 isn’t canon, but it’s as close to canon as possible - and, hopefully, will keep being like that for some time too. It’s something I wanted and needed and I’m glad people appreciated it and felt it was good for them too.

And now, I will gladly branch into other stuff. I need to do a bit of a makeover on the blog and expand the “not SaSi” section, first. Then I already have three series I want to talk about and one will be very long, so it might take a lot of time. And then Eurovision will come in May and the Book of Bill will come out in June and maybe I will also talk about the books I love in the future? Or about other series I follow and enjoy? I still don’t know, but be sure I won’t run out of things to talk about. I just wish my ramblings will be worthy of your time and I will keep deserving your appreciation, no matter what I’ll talk about <3