#“i dont really see any future here but all I know is he got his toys and I am having fun building it”

[miutonium]

Its 4 am, I should be sleeping but why is it that I just have the urge to draw and ship her with a pathetic nerd gf??

[kcrossvine-art]

hi friends! :D y'all voted and fought neck and neck for this SO- heres the first entry into our little cooking journey of J. R. R. Tolkeins fictional food for his fictional little guys he puts in fictional turmoils for our enjoyment and awe!

 Before we get started i wanna say i owe my heart to all the LotR fans who upkeep the wiki, debate the cannon, and create their own versions of the foods mentioned. Both because of my love for people who LOVE (passionate people)(passion about anything) and because my own knowledge of this series is a little dusty. I've never seen the movies but I did read the books growing up. I'll be learning and remembering things from a fairly newbie standpoint, so no worries if you yourself arent familiar with the series! (and if you are familiar, hopefully youll forgive me!)

We will be making Lembas ('waybread') today! If you've made your own version of this please feel free to share it, similarly if you have any ideas for what we make next!

(As always you can find the cooking instructions and full ingredient list under the break-)

MY NAMES CROSS NOW LETS COOK LIKE ANIMALS

SO, “what goes in to Lembas?” YOU MIGHT ASKWell so the funny thing is we kinda dont know. At least not entirely? The elves are dicks like that. But heres what we'll be using in ours-

Butter

Self-rising flour

Granulated Sugar

Raisins

A small dried fruit of your choosing

Almonds OR Pecans

EGG

Whole Milk

Heavy Cream

And if you would like for dipping-

Blackberry jam

To the extent i understand this is kinda like hardtack from the bri'ish military, but a fantastical version of it that actually tastes really good. Hardtack was a military provision with the texture of a brick that took a long time to spoil and could be easily carried with soldiers. So the texture we're going for is super dense, packed full with nuts and fruits (haha just lik-), but perhaps not that dense. We want something closer to a dog biscuit than actual tack.

I remembered something about corn being mentioned, thankfully the wiki clarified that no actually the british just referred to any grain as corn back in the day. Thank Fuck! Although I would like to try a version of this using masa in the future.

AND, “what does Lembas taste like?” YOU MIGHT ASK

Took a few tries but eventually got it perfectly chewy and dense

The raisins cook-in like little beads of flavortown sweetness

Cant speak for other fruits but for dried apple it softened up nicely, kinda matching the raisins in the end

Im a big pecan slut, pecans fuck on anything especially here. Crumble them on top after you coat the dough with the egg-mixture for some visual appeal

Somewhat flakey outside

The jam was my idea, it was nice but might be too sweet for some tastes

Would pair very well with a kiwi flavored drink

Or mead

I can see why this would a travelling provision. Its both sugary (a good thing when expending energy) and filling (also a good thing when youre travelling) while not being overwhelming with flavor (if youre prone to motion sickness. Horse sickness? Do get motion sickness on horses?)

Its like how if you're going hiking you want a good mix of sugars and salts, to balance your intake of water.

. If you wanna make it like the illustrations or the movie, use a cookie cutter for either triangles or squares . If you don't have a cookie cutter, an apple cutter also works ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ . try to keep the board you'll roll the dough out onto chilled before you use it, it seems better for the texture of the food though i dont entirely know why

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So from beginning to end, it took about an hour and half for the first attempt. Down to about 40 minutes for the second attempt. These are a real simple recipe because its not like a croissant where the margin for error is nonexistent. Middle-earth be damned my boy can work a grill.

I'd recommend storing in a tubberware container, but if you're deadset on using leaves please rinse and dry them first, and wrap the bread in either wax paper or saran wrap underneath. We dont have mallorn leaves in real life (as far as we know) but most salad greens should work, or as Marie Porter says (linked in the reblogs!) a banana leaf.

I really enjoyed the process of making this recipe, itd be really easy to batch-bake these en masse, and the process of eating said recipe. Like all jokes aside, i think this would be a great substitute for trailmix. Its not going to get smushed and even if it breaks a bit it wont affect the taste. It wont keep you fed for a whole day but pair it with some pickles or a salty snack and yeah itll keep your motor running.

I give this recipe a solid 10/10 (with 1 being food that makes one physically sick and 10 being food that gives one a lust for life again.) Let me know if you think I got something wrong, or if you ran into issues with the recipe. We're off to a strong start, lads!

🐁 ORIGINAL RESIPPY TEXT BELOW 🐁

Ingredients:

6 TBSP butter, chilled

2 cups self-rising flour

1 TBSP granulated sugar

½ cup raisins

½ other dried fruit (strawberry slices, oranges, etc.), chopped

Handful of almonds or pecans, chopped

1 egg, well beaten

½ cup whole milk

4 TBSP heavy cream

Method:

Preheat your oven to 400 f.

Cut the butter into slivers/small pieces. With your hands, combine the butter into the flour in a mixing bowl until the mixture resembles coarse sand.

Chop your dried nuts and dried fruit until it feels right.

Mix in the sugar, raisins, nut, and dried fruit of your choosing

In a seperate bowl, beat the egg until combined, and then mix in the milk until combined. Keep a bit of this mixture to brush the tops of the bread.

Stir while adding the egg/milk mixture and the heavy cream into the flour. Mix just until combined into a soft dough.

Knead the dough until firm on a floured surface.

Roll into a half inch thickness and cut with a square or leaf shaped cookie cutter. (...or in my case, an apple corer).

Place on a lightly greased baking sheet, with about an inch of space between each piece. Brush the tops of the lembas with some of the mixture you saved earlier.

Bake for about 15-20 minutes, or until it turns a soft gold and the inside is chewy.

[thisfanisgonesorry]

keep talking — könig

got into cod because someone told me he was 6’9 and so i told them i wanna 69

tags: light angst, bros injured, smut, dubcon kinda, phone sex except its a walkie talkie. rushed ending lowkey, ambiguous relationship. ambiguous ending ooo. light blackmail, soldier!reader, y/n is watching better call saul (dont @ me), povs might be weird idk

⚠️

“König, how copy?”

Nothing. Literal radio silence.

“König, I’m talking to you. How copy?”

“I’m here.” He grunted after a long period of silence. “Bad copy.”

“I say again. Did you get caught in the crossfire?” 

The battlefield surrounding König had bullet shells everywhere, he laid carefully in the ground, trying to hide his large body from any further incoming fire.

“I did.”

“Are you okay?”

“Fine.”

“What are your injuries?”

“I’m fine.” He growled.

“Where are you?”

“I don’t know. Too much dust.”

“König, are you in a safe place? I’m gonna need you to stay there until it’s safe enough for someone to get you.” 

“Affirmative.” He panted. 

“I need you to say something, König.”

“Minimal damage, only flesh wounds. A few hits in the right leg.” He grunted in frustration. “I got my vest, I’m fine.”

He laid in the ditch, looking around the empty battlefield, only being able to make out clouds of smoke and dust as gunfire continued from the distance, the fight being gradually dragged away from him. He winced as the blood kept pouring out of his thigh.

He dug his fingers into one of the bullet holes in the pants, using it as a weak point to rip the fabric. His hands were too dirty to try and tend the wound himself, so he turned the leg of his pants into makeshift shorts; pulling the fabric down his leg and using the length of it to make a tourniquet for the wound.

“Come in, König.”

“Scheiße.. What?” He barked into the receiver. “I’m not dying, fräulein.”

There was a silence as he tried to shuffle his large body into the ditch, giving his leg room while trying to stay undetected. 

“We can’t risk that.” I finally said from the other end.

“Then talk to me. I’m not dying. Don’t treat me like it.” He spoke sternly.

“What do you expect me to talk about?”

“Anything. Just don’t mention that I’m bleeding out.”

“The mission—”

“Not the mission.” He snapped again. “Your day or something.”

“Sorry, um..” I paused, lost on conversation.

There was a moment of silence and he groaned at the hesitance before the receiver burst to life again. He felt a pang of guilt as he palmed himself through his cargo pants. He’d been shot at enough times to learn that the fastest way to get rid of pain is to replace it with something better, and in situations where first aid was out of the question for the foreseeable future, this was all he had unless he decided to just put up with it.

“Okay.” I started. “I started watching a lawyer show. It’s really good.” I started rambling slightly about the show until I ran out of information that König would care for.

I tried to jump from topic to topic seamlessly but a one-sided conversation wasn’t easy to keep going.

“I don’t really have a lot of spare time, so I’m running out of things to talk about.” I commented, noticing a lack of response. “König?”

“I’m alive.” He spoke through shaking breaths.

“Are you okay?”

“Mhm..” He nodded, despite me being unable to see him.

“I say again. Are you okay?”

“Gut. Ich bin prima.” He spoke. “Tut höllisch weh.” While I couldn’t make out what he was saying, his sarcasm and frustration was detectable from a mile away.

“English, König.”

“Hurts like hell.” He groaned out.

All of his actions could be explained one way or another, his ambiguous silence, his heavy breathing and grunting. From one end it seemed like a man in pain. On the other end of things, he had his head thrown back in the dirt, stroking himself slowly as the words filled his ears.

His breathing was ragged, hissing and panting as he tried to distract himself. He would manage to build his composure when he needed to talk through the comms, but besides that, he was a mess. Whining and grunting as he tried to focus on the sweet voice on the receiver instead of the stinging metal that was sinking into his skin.

He desperately jerked himself off, stroking his dick tenderly. “Keep talking.” He groaned. “Bitte, I’m bleeding everywhere. Hurts.”

“König..?” I began to feel suspicious at his pleas, it was so unlike him to be like this, he’d been shot before without acting this strange, he was swaying between aggressive and gentleness. “Are you..?”

“No.” He answered quickly, to the point where it raised more suspicion. He cringed at his own reaction, realising he sold himself out, and admitting it with his chest bare.

“König.” I said more sternly.

“Ich musste es tun, es tut so weh und deine stimme fühlt sich so gut an.” He groaned, using the wrong head to think, barely comprehensive as he rambled in a language I couldn’t even speak.

I took a deep inhale, his ramblings proving my point. “Say again in english please.”

“Yes.” He managed to get out.

“Yes, you’re jerking off?”

“Musste, kleine.” He panted, and while I still couldn’t make out his words, I understood that he was admitting to it, and by the sounds eliciting from his throat, it was clear that he wasn’t stopping. “Zu sagen dass es mir leid tut wäre eine lüge.”

“König.”

“Please.” He finally spoke out in english. “Please, keep talking.”

“What do you expect me to say?”

“Anything.” He groaned, and there was a moment of silence as we both sat in thought. His harsh demeanour melted quickly, he had no right of way to be a snappy colonel here as the need consumed him wholly.

“Do you expect me to talk dirty to you? Tell you that I bet you’re so hard and aching? That you’re probably leaking everywhere?”

“Scheiße, ja.” He nodded to the blankness of the battlefield, knowing that I couldn’t see his enthusiasm but wanting to express it anyway.

“And that’s all for me?”

“Ja, ja.” He panted out with need. “Need you.. Please?”

I sigh into the receiver and his breath catches in his throat, he gently massages his tip, enough to keep him going but not enough to build any pleasure. Guilt slowly began to consume him but he refused to let that be the other option. He didn’t want to sit in the dirt, bleeding out and crying out in pain instead of ecstasy.

“What do you want me to say?”

“What.. Do you want to say?” He responded carefully, keeping himself calm enough for this conversation to go smoothly. “Please, I’m.. Uh, werde abspritzen.. Orgasm.” He struggled out, his mind going blank.

“You have a lot of explaining to do later.”

“I know.” He groaned. “Tell me.”

I sucked my teeth. “I don’t know what to say to you, König. You want me to tell you how I want you buried deep in me?”

He let out a moan. “That.” He gritted.

“You’re fantasising about how good my pussy feels, right?”

“Ja, gute muschi.” He moaned, and soft slapping sounds began to be audible through the radio. I felt glad that no one else could listen into this line. He muttered incoherencies in English and German, it was hard to keep track of what he was trying to say.

The shame kept threatening to lay heavy on his conscience, though he managed to push it away every time it tried, but that didn’t mean it wouldn’t come back later.

“You sound close.”

“Am.” He swallowed thickly. “So sexy. So beautiful.”

“Mhm? Want me to say something about how I fuck myself in my quarters? Gotta keep myself quiet so the others don’t hear me through the shitty paper-thin walls?” I started. “Or how I’m tight because I haven’t got a boyfriend? My Colonel doesn't give me enough time off, y’know?”

The passive aggressiveness was something he made a mental note of, something to save for later to make up for his actions. Right now, he was focused on the orgasm threatening to rip through his body. 

“Mhm, like that.” He whined, covering his mouth and his sounds becoming more muffled. “Scheiße—” The embarrassment in his voice lingered in the line for longer than his words did but it didn’t dissuade him. “Can explain this.. Later. Ah, please, right there.” He managed to curse out.

He panted and groaned, a mix of ‘sorry’ and ‘thank you’ filled the air, surrounded by something or other in german. It was hard to tell what was happening through the walkie talkie, though before I could respond, his dick twitched in his hand, spilling cum from the tip, leaking over his hand and down onto his pants.

He threw his head back into the dirt, trying to regain himself, his afterglow of bliss successfully distracting him, but not enough to not worry about the growing guilt. “Sorry.” He mumbled.

“So.. You can explain why you were out of position or why you were jacking off?”

“Both.” He breathed. “I can do both. I’m sorry.”

“Evac van is on its way, it might take a bit to find you.” I tried to bite back a smile. “You should clean up.”

“I know.” He swallowed. “Thanks, uh.. I’m..”

He sighed, knowing better than to keep apologising, mindlessly wiping his hand on his pants, not caring too much of the stain and trying to reorganise himself. He crawled around the ditch, trying to make his position more obvious to the humvee, he could vaguely see it in the distance.

“Tell me you’re not mad, right?” He spoke through the radio, trying to walk towards a more visible vantage point where the enemy wouldn’t see him if there were any lingerers despite the fact that the fight was most certainly further down the open field at this point.

I laughed through the radio, and the cackle of life it brought to the abandoned field was uneasy as he slowly tried to move towards the van.

“No, not mad, but I definitely plan to use this against you in the near future.” 

[luffyvace]

HIIII hru !!! may i please ask for some feitan fluffs hcs 😩 i love this tiny man with all my soul

IM DOING GOOD!! YES YOU MAY!!! I ACTUALLY HAVE SUCH A DEEP ROOTED LOVE FOR HIM I DONT TALK ABOUT HIM OFTEN ENOUGH💥💥

(omg this reminds me i’m supposed to be doing the whole troupe and chuuya x male reader- i’m so all over the place but the point is another dabble of feitan hcs will be here in the future! 😋)

also ooc/fanon him since this is fluff :)

tw: death…and torture (i use “unalive” instead of d!e/k!ll)

alrighty so you said fluff headcanons and it’s highly likely you’ll get fluffy feitan if you’ve known each other for a long time (since meteor)

i’m going to dabble in reader that is both in and outside of the troupe because i can :)

so for reader that’s in the troupe first of all no pda

hardly any weakness was displayed besides sadness/anger or mourning (and some funny moments)

theres no need for cuddles during business

unless your like uvo and simply don’t care

then it annoys the crap out of him <3

it’s not like he doesn’t want your affection—just not in public

will cuddle you in private tho

y’all usually sit there in silence or read together

he can be a little spoon or big spoon it doesn’t bother him

he tries his best but he’s never let anyone else so close to him before

if you introduce something to him and he likes it he’ll do it back

because why would you do it to him if you wouldn’t want it done to you right?

im gonna assume you have either a apartment which you unalived the owner of or y’all live in meteor still

he’ll let you choose really he doesn’t care where you stay

he’d even unalive a high status person to steal their mansion if that’s what you want

your obviously strong and have some sort of nen if your in the troupe so he doesn’t bother worrying

although if your like kortopi he’ll stay vigilant for you

even though you can use nen to defend yourself as well

btw if your not a pda person the troupe is grateful

aint no body wanna see allat-

he doesn’t know how to cook or clean and since your both from meteor so i hope you learn or already know how

otherwise y’all eat what y’all can when y’all can

whether you steal a five star gourmet meal or just wait for the next opportunity like a vending machine

i don’t advise you ask for a pet by the way

he’ll tortu£ it and i’m not talking about strapping it down or anything

just purely scarring them 😭

if you be firm about him stopping he will

unless it’s a big scary dog or smth

then he’s more likely to take em under his wing and train them to be vicious

will scare people with said animal

for stay at home reader…. (most of these also apply for troupe reader<3)

i say stay at home bc with his portion of money you could buy anything you want

if you tell him what you want u can get it for free cuz he steals it

but

if you want to take a bath together it would take more than a god to convince him

seriously he sees no reason in it

once you do tho

at first he is on one end of the tub and your on the other

as time goes on he’ll let you lean back into his chest as he scrubs your hair

he lets you play in his hair

don’t tell ANYONE

he don’t like vulnerability so if you tell someone he won’t do it for like 2 weeks

you think he’s never gonna do it again until you crawl into his lap while he’s reading on the bed and ask really sweetly

he’s all yours after that

HIS HAIR IS SO FLUFFY!!

and yes he lets you play with it :)

you get to put it into all types of styles!!

especially since it’s a decent length!

not really interested in playing in your hair

he tries but the rubber band always ends up tangled in your hair

if you kiss him goodnight he will start to initiate it as well

thats one thing he will forever reciprocate

loves your humor

no matter the type

but he especially loves when you laugh at his dark jokes

youve seen him smile before 💖

warms your heart knowing no one else gets this side of him

not judgmental of your looks for obvious reasons

yall got bigger problems

dismisses anytime you degrade yourself

he be speaking facts

”the way your hair looks gonna unalive you?”

”your pimples will st^b you while sleeping?”

no? you goofy goober so why does it matter

don’t argue him on this

genuinely doesn’t like the idea of you being hurt

by him or someone else

dont expect anyone who does harm to you to see the tomorrow sun

even if you plead for them don’t waste your breath pleading you need to be saying goodbye

real loyal partner

as loyal to you as he is the troupe

you and the troupe are his forever commitments

no matter what he could never stop loving you

you guys practically never argue

hes not necessarily hotheaded but will say what’s on his mind and if someone disagrees he does it anyway

thing is he compensates with you💗

if he knows your nitpicking he ignores it but if it’s genuinely something you don’t like he won’t fight it

also he cleans up well if you don’t like to see blood/gore in your place after he’s done t•rturing someone

he respects and listens to your opinions and feelings

would love if your a sadistic person as well but he understands if your not

also if your not in the troupe he teaches you nen

only the troupe knows your together and where you stay for your safety

your safety is definitely on his priority list

truly cares about and loves you

enjoy!!!! i’ll prob come back and read my own hcs bc I LOVE HIM

thank you for this request i loved writing every letter of it♡

[hanafubukki]

What if the Chairman was Levan Draconia?

I was talking with Ell (@memoryoflife) about the theories of Crowley being Levan Draconia and all the symbolisms you can find in NRC with their similarities in structure to Briar Valley and the Fortress looking the same as the coliseum.

Then we starting talking about how this is Yana we are talking about. Would she make it so obvious that Crowley is Leavan? What if she was using Dire Crowley as a distraction. The truth subtly hidden among the clues? Thank you @prince-kallisto (our Crowley Connoisseur) for helping me find the scene where the chairman is mentioned.

So that got me thinking more, wasn't there a moment in which Crowley mentions a superior? And he very nonchalantly mentioned the Chairman as well, but why? Knowing how any little detail in this game can be a clue to the future books/revelations (History lessons, events, etc.), I can't help but wonder if this was one as well.

Because why suddenly mention the chairman, why not just introduce himself? So what if Levan was the chairman? Most, if not all, of the clues pointing towards Crowley being Levan can be used on the Chairman as well.

Now what do we know about Levan Draconia? He is the Left General, Meleanor's husband, he saved Lilia's NRC letter, he went missing on a diplomatic mission, and he wanted to strengthen relations between the humans and fae.

Additionally, he taught the fae the human language so they can communicate better. He seems the more level headed and future thinking of the three childhood friends. Thank you Mumble for going over Levan info with me (@irafuwas).

Knowing this, it would make sense if the Chairman was Levan Draconia.

It would explain the similarities in the symbolisms/fashion with see with Briar Valley, what if it was the Chairman who decorated/influenced it?

As Ell pointed out, it would be a strategic way to have Crowley to continue being in the game and have merch as well, especially if he was a pawn from the beginning.

This would also explain why Crowley is constantly looking for the Blot stones, and why in every book, he has someway/somehow influenced the OBs.

Because someone was telling him behind the scenes what to do and what to look out for, and with Levan's future thinking, this would fit.

This would also explain why Lilia does not recognize Crowley if Crowley was Levan because he isn’t.

(unless they are fraternal twins, that's why they dont look alike. It would explain the whole "why is he here?' line in history lessons too)

When I think about this, it makes me wonder even more. You know? Why such a offhand comment, unless there's a story element for it?

Levan being a Chairman would also explain him teaching the fae the human language because of his future-esque thinking.

Why he also saved Lilia's NRC letter because he knew what will happen in the future and who will play such roles.

Now this brings into question about Levan's Unique magic, what if his was opposite's of Lilia's?

Lilia's UM looks into the past/memories, so what if Levan's looks into the future? This is why he cared about the relationship between human and faes, why he saved the letter, etc.?

But then you can't help but wonder, where does Meleanor play a role in this? Did she know? What is her UM?

Did she sacrifice herself knowing this future? And that's why she was so confident about Lilia and Malleus?

Was she somehow saved?

And then we think about Levan, and if he is alive and knew the events, did he really let his wife die?

Let his friend live with the trauma of his disappearance, also take the risk of his child never being born and growing up so restricted?

Was this why Meleanor gave the "blessing' she did to Malleus?

(What if they knew about the events with Grim, was this their way of making Grim into a chimera? or maybe, just maybe, stop Grim?

because they saw all the people that Malleus and Lilia loved, and they wanted to save them?)

Wether Levan is alive or dead, the results will be devastating when we find out what happened to him.

[secret-smut-sideblog]

Satiated

Astarion x F! Dark Urge

18+ violence, beheading, blood drinking, arousal at violence, sub/dom if you squint, p-in-v, sex with armor on, vulnerability, aftercare, complicated feelings, porn w/ very little plot, deranged shit and I'm not sorry

With Astarion starving in the Underdark his bloodthirsty friend sees his hunger, knows it quite well. And with a promised death in their future, seeks to help him sate himself...

-

Their time in the Underdark could have only been days but seemed to drag on endlessly. The lack of sunlight making him miserable. Snappy.

He knew he was being unfair when she asked quietly if he was alright and he scoffed at her. "Please. Spare me the coddling."

There was mild hurt in her eyes but she held her hands up in surrender. "Sorry, Star. I wont ask again."

He almost sighed, compelled to call her back and apologize. But he was nothing if not stubborn.

Honestly, the lack of sunlight was just salt in the wound. The true torment was hunger.

Nearly no wildlife available, and what was stalking around was not easy prey. If the blood in these beasts was any good anyway, he did not feel like risking life and limb every night to get some likely rancid blood.

Sure she had offered her neck a few times but she needed her strength, and it wounded his pride to feel like a charity case.

So the answer to his plight had been the spoils of combat. Any time they felled a duergar, a drow, he was draining the bodies dry.

The first few times his companions had shot eachother looks but she turned them by the shoulder, speaking quietly into their ears. Leading them away to let him feast.

He really did appreciate her, though he was struggling to show it recently. With her bloodlust he knew she understood on some level. Looked at him when he got like this with gentle recognition instead of disgust.

When they reached the Grymforge he felt delirious in hunger. Looking around at all the walking bodies, he could smell the blood.

He set his sights on the Drow, already promised dead to the Myconid's. A full meal. They just needed to get the idiot out of the rock fall and he could be sated.

When it finally came time to kill Nere and his followers he miraculously harvested all of his adrenaline and did his part, firing down arrows from on high. Watching her dance her violence into their foes.

Oh he did love watching her work. Her movements were always so joyful, a wide smile she didn't seem aware of splitting her face. Blades plunging so smoothly through chests, across throats. He adjusted his trousers as subtly as he could from his perch. Hearing her laugh, such a beautiful sound for such violent deeds.

Gods no wonder everyone was afraid of her. He should be too. And yet...

Afterwards the pleasantries were exchanged, the slaves freed, blah blah blah. His eyes were glazed over, all of his restraint focused on maintaining decorum. Mouth salivating, fangs aching.

His patience snapping, he connected to her tadpole. Hells below, can we PLEASE finish this up?

She glanced over at him, a small smile pressing the corner of her lips.

"Get out of here before I change my mind." She growled at the duergar.

"Astarion, help me with the head." She commanded. "Karlach, Lae'zel, take the remaining gnomes to the boats and make sure the path to the elevator is clear. We dont need any surprises."

"Aye, Soldier!" Karlach barked, Lae'zel nodding next to her.

"With me." She whispered, dark eyes meeting his. He raised an eyebrow slightly.

Surely she didn't need help with a beheading. He had watched her do much more strenuous violence quite easily. Ignored the twitch in his armor at the thought.

The Drow's slack form lay in a heap on the rock floor. He saw a shiver go down her spine as she straddled over the body.

"Sorry Astarion, we've got to do this first. Then we'll get you fed."

So she did plan to help him. Through the delirium he felt a tingle of fondness for her.

He could only nod, not trusting his saliva soaked mouth to form words.

She pulled her blade, chest heaving. Deeply aroused he realized, he could smell it radiating from her. He moved back to the shadows next to her to give himself some privacy as his own arousal spiked. The little remaining blood in his body pooling in his lower half.

She lifted the body to a sitting position, holding the torso steady between her knees, gripping the hair for leverage. Pressing her blade down on the throat.

He was confused by her technique at first. Surely it would be easier against the ground? Then realized what she was doing. Gravity. Keeping as much of the blood in the body as possible.

He stifled a moan, hunching over slightly. Gods he felt feral.

Back and forth she sawed through. Her eyes glazing over in pleasure. A slack smile pulling her face. Hips subtly grinding into the torso. Lost in herself.

He understood why she had sent everyone away.

When the head finally came free she gripped the scalp, smiling serenely. Free hand trying to catch the pooled blood pouring from the neck. Finding him in the dark.

Well? Her eyes said, pupils blown.

Shocked that he had forgotten his hunger for a moment he dove on the body.

Lapping and slurping he was lost. Laving his tongue along the plateau of flesh. Stopping to pull the pooled blood in her palm into his mouth, licking her fingers clean. Vaguely aware of a whimper from her lips.

Most of the blood gone from the wound he sank viscously into the lower neck, finding the base of the jugular. A tide of hot blood bursting into his mouth, rolling his eyes back. Oh gods he could barely stand it.

"There you go," She purred, pushing his hair out of his face. "You're doing so good."

His eyes met hers in a craze, a deep growl from his chest. The sensation of finally being fed and her soft words melding into something he had never felt before.

If he had more sense about him he might have laughed. From being forbidden from drinking from thinking creatures to being praised for it. The same person he had broken that chain with showering him with sweet words.

He gripped the body, his whole being focused on the singular task of getting more. More. More.

Some stray blood left his lips, dripping down the neck. Her eyes met it, lips parting.

Before he knew what was happening she leaned forward, licking it up in one small stroke. The tip of her tongue meeting the edge of his lip.

Did she...? Does she drink blood? He had never considered it but now it fired a piston of lust in his pelvis.

He pulled off of the wound, pressing his hand hard against it to keep as much in as he could.

Catching the nape of her neck and pulling her into his mouth roughly.

Pushing the mouthful he held into hers urgently.

He saw her eyes hitch back. Gripping his forearm. Throat working, moaning between swallows into his copper mouth.

Hells Below, he was going to go mad.

He latched back on, still ravenous. His eyes locked on her.

She stared at him with the same intensity. Eyes darting to the smeared blood he left in his wake. Back to his eyes. Her need apparent.

He pulled her by the throat to inches from his clamped down mouth. Pushed her jaw open roughly.

She whimpered hotly, tongue coming out to lave at his mess. Could feel the heat of her, their cheeks nearly touching.

Her tongue kept swiping at the seam of his lips as more blood slipped out. He nearly lost it when she devoted her tongue just to him, moaning sweet little calls against his jaw.

The vigor came back to him with a vengeance. The blood that wasnt fireworking across the base of his skull shooting straight to his pelvis.

The flow to his mouth getting weak he fell on his back, pulling the body over him. Loud choppy pants as he lifted his hips up. All decorum lost, he was vulgar in his need. The angle pushing the blood out. Pouring into his open mouth. Closing his eyes in deep ecstasy.

"Oh, Astarion..." She hushed, coming to kneel behind him. Her thighs caging around his head, looking down at him. Fingers running through his hair. "You've been so patient."

He nodded, looking up at her.

"You must have been so hungry." She reached forward, finger catching a stray drop traveling down his jaw.

"I'm sorry I made you wait this long." Parting her plush lips and licking it in. Seeing the edge of her tongue swirling around her fingertip.

Finally releasing the drained body he sucked his breath through his teeth.

Throwing it off of him he reached up, catching her face in both hands. Pulling her sweet mouth upside down into his. Drowning in her.

She cupped his jaw, kissing him slow. Searing. Pulling his lip into her mouth and biting softly.

He moaned into her, arching his head up for more. The blood sliding hot between their lips.

Gods she was so warm, so soft. It never failed to shock him just how heavenly she felt. Her hair falling curtain around his head. Her scent hitting the back of his throat. Jasmine, coffee, orange blossom. He wanted to be smothered by it.

Not able to stand it any longer he opened the fastenings on his armor, freeing himself from the painful cage of his arousal.

She pulled away slowly, a trail of their saliva between their lips. Looked at his length, his hand pumping along it, with lidded eyes.

Flipping she straddled over him, high on her knees. "Would you like some help?" She rumbled, fingers tracing along the fastenings on her own armor.

He nearly froze, sex was something he still felt... complicated about. And yet, he liked her. Really liked her. Trusted her. Or at least as close to trust as he could muster.

And Gods was he attracted to her, tall, curvy, scary. Very scary. Yet somehow still alluring, big doe eyes and soft plush lips. A mesmerizing contradiction.

He nodded. Gripping the chainmail on her hip.

"If we need to stop, say serpent. Okay?" She smiled, undoing the fastenings. Gods she wasn't even wearing underclothes, her perfect cunt hovering over him. A trail of wetness already pooling between.

"I like the choice of word. How devilish." He purred, watching as she lined herself up to him.

"Glad to see you found your voice again, Star." She smiled. Teasing his head in circles at her entrance. "What would I do without your voice drawling at my back all day?"

He was about to respond but she slammed her hips down. He almost saw stars, head thrown back.

"Mean." He gasped, to her evil giggle.

"Cant always let you get the last word." She smiled, trailing her hand tenderly down his cheek. His breath caught in his throat.

Her hips began to rise and fall. The cold bite of her armor against his hands his only anchor. The molten pressure of her cunt unbelievable. He was already panting.

"Gods you feel so good." She moaned, rolling her hips. Trying to hit the spot below her navel that he could find with his fingers. He arched his hips, saw her eyelids flutter, rubbing against it.

Her pace was slow, arching into him languidly. Pulling nearly entirely out then sliding back down, all the way to the hilt.

He was already writhing under her. Simultaneously needing her to pick up the pace but calling for his undoing if she did.

"While I'd enjoy riding you all night, we don't have much longer till our friends return." She mused. "So,"

Her hips began slamming into his, fast and angry.

He choked out a moan, the very same life that had been returned to him attempting to be pulled from his pelvis. Barely holding on.

He wouldn't come first. Reaching up to rub her clit.

"Gods your stubborn." She admonished, swatting his hand away.

"Let me help you find release, just one more time." She murmured, cradling the back of his head. Leaning down and catching the lobe of his ear in her mouth, nibbling and suckling.

Oh that was cheating. He groaned, hips fucking up into her hard. Nearly lost.

Her pleasure not being the forefront throwing him. Didnt she want to find her end?

"Please come inside me, Astarion." She whispered hot in his ear. Tongue licking a line up the sharp edge. "Please, beautiful."

He shuddered and with a great contraction behind his navel he was gone. Strangled whimpering moans, head thrown back. Gods above and below it felt like she was pulling his soul out.

Hips stuttering into her. Her's still rising and falling, wrenching him for all he was worth. He gripped fruitlessly at the rubble around them. Panting sharp little moans. Trying to find grounding in her chainmail thighs.

"Serpent," He groaned, the overstimulation too much.

Her hips stopped immediately. Pulling off of him and wiping him clean gently. Gingerly redressing his fastenings before hers. Her fingers sure but careful.

He stared down, dumbfounded. He had never had a lover attend to him before.

Felt the need to turn away from her, sitting up. Suddenly too vulnerable. Leaning his head into his hand, the heel pushing into his cheekbone.

"You okay?" She asked, attending to her own needs now. Tone kind and undemanding.

"You're just full of surprises, aren't you?" He quipped, glancing at her. Trying to shake his mask back on.

She laughed, standing. Readjusting her armor with a few jostling pulls. "More than any of us know, I'd wager." She sighed.

"Hey, I dont want you to wait until it gets this bad again. Lots of people need killing and it's my pleasure to help. Truly."

Reaching her hand out easily to help him up.

He looked up at her, framed by the light of the cave in opening. The burning heat halo around her head. Her face serious again but eyes still warm. "You with me?" She asked after a beat.

He clasped his hand around her wrist. "Always."

~

[romanarose]

Addicted

Steven Grant x fem!reader

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Moon Knight Master List

Marc's part here : Jake's part here

Summary: After Marc fails to take you in, Jake makes his attempt. When that fails, it's up to Steven Grant to bring you into the Innead before Khonshu has his head.

A/N: I started this series before I started @romana-after-dark and I went back and forth on whether or not to put this fic there or here. I opted for here, despite the darkish contents, as this is where the first 2 parts were. However, I ask you HEAD THE WARNINGS! While this is not dub con or non con, there is blood and knife play. As always, I extensively tag my fics to a fault, so if you read something you dont like and I warned you, that's on you, not me. Of course, as always, If I miss something, please let me know!

A/N2: IM SO SORRY THIS TOOK LIKE 9 MONTHS TO WRITE LOLOLOLOLOL

WARNINGS: PIV sex, lots of oral (f receiving), squirting, bondage, knife play, blood kink, (it's established they like wild sex and they consent), lil degrading, that's it? I think?

***************

"I'm so addicted to all the things you do when you're going down on me in between the sheets

Oh every sound you make, with every breath you take, it's unlike anything when you're loving me"

A knock on a hotel room door only ever spelt trouble for you, but when you opened the door to see your handsome nemesis, you couldn’t help but smile, warmth gathering in anticipation. 

You open the door, leaning against the frame. “And you must be Steven Grant, pleased to finally meet you. Should I make a run for it before we fuck or shall we skip to the good part?” You tease him, but all he does is smile at you.

He’s got a soft look on his face, a gentle but knowing smile; almost a smirk, really. “Pleasure to meet you. And no, we wouldn’t need any of that nonsense this time, will we?”

“I don’t know, pretty boy, you tell me.”

Steven was standing with his hand stuffed in his pocket, a dusty blue button up with birds on it in a contrast to Marc and Jake’s clothes. Steven wasted no time walking in the hotel room like he owned the place, forcing you to back up until you were against the wall, his firm body pressed up against yours. “Now, shall we skip the pleasantries?”

“Strictly business, are we? Not even bothering with a spiel about taking me in, this time?”

Hands are on your body, gently sliding up and down the sides. “Oh, I will be taking you in, love.” His face was close, lips grazing over yours in shared breathes. “But first, I’m taking my time with you, and isn’t that better than a quick romp in the woods or the alley?”

He was cute, this one. You were certain Steven would fold much easier than Jake, certainly easier than Marc, the soft little man he was.

“Same rules as always?” You ask, taking a quick nip from his pouty lower lip to see what he’d do, but Steven just smiled.

“You want to stop, we’ll stop, but I’m bringing you in either way.”

“Yeah” You scoff at him, laughing a bit. That’s what the others said. “Okay, whatever, just ki-” You were cut off by Steven claiming your mouth, forcefully kissing you as his body pressed against yours. 

Reaching for his pants, you go to undo his belt but Steven’s hand catches you. He pulls away from the kiss, dragging your lip out between his teeth, an eyebrow cocked in your direction. “Now darling, you know you aren’t in control, right?”

His expression made you a little weak in the knees, but you were not deterred. It was a bit of a cat and mouse between you and Jake, so maybe you just needed a little power play. You would need to distract him, after all, if you were going to make another run for it. But first, an orgasm. They were quite good at that, if you remember correctly.

Keeping your wrist gripped in large hand, Steven kissed you as he undid his pants and stepped out of them, leaving his boxers on. “If my memory serves me, we’ve never been full naked in front of each other, is that right?”

You nod, trying your best to look submissive and innocent. “Yes sir”

He smiled at that. Got ‘em.

“That’s because Marc and Jake don’t know how to treat a lady, how to take their time…” Steven's eyes grazed up and down your body as he unbuttoned your pajama top, exposing your breasts which he brushed over with his hands with a soft murmur of ‘beautiful’. “They’ve never even tasted you, little dove, and isn’t that just a shame?” When you didn’t answer, Steven gripped your chin and forced you to make eye contact with him, tsking a few times. “I believe I asked you a question, darling. Marc and Jake never put their face between your legs, have they?”

“N-no sir” Yeah, that’s it. Fake submission… it still faking, right?

“That’s right, smart one, aren’t you? Now,” Relinquishing your face, Steven guided your hands to the hem of his shirt. “Would you like to do the honors?”

You give a small, quick nod and pull the shirt up and over his head… he was gorgeous. Their body was toned, strong, but soft at the belly, pecs looking juicing and ready to be sucked on.

“Can I touch you?” You ask, rolling your hips to feel his hard cock in his boxer briefs.

Once given permission, you put your hands on his body reverently. Slowly, you kiss him, then make your way down his jaw, sucking on his neck and down to his chest. You lick and suck and nibble a little bit before making your hair to the desired location. With Steven undressed and you only with your shirt unbuttoned, you could get Steven worked up enough, distracted enough…

“Good girl, good fucking girl” Steven groans out when you start sucking on his nipples, alternating between them. You feel him pull his dick out, throbbing in his hand as he starts to furiously masterbate. “Keep going like that, make daddy proud, little dove. F-fuck, you’re gonna make me cum, don’t worry darling, I’ll take care of you, just- god, god the mouth on you.” 

As his pumping grew more and more erratic, you can see he’s hanging his head back as Steven pleased himself to the feeling on you sucking on his nipples, ready to cum just from that. It was a shame honestly, you bet he’d look so so pretty cumming like this… but you weren’t getting taken in. When you reach for the bedroom drawer, trying to find your knife while he’s distracted, all movements from Steven stop and you find yourself being flung against the wall, face pressed into the plaster.

“F-fuck, you cheeky little thing. Thought you were going to distract me with orgasm, were you?” He was panting heavily, an irritated voice and hot breath in your ear as he restrained you against him, his cocked pressed into you.

“Yes daddy” You giggle; you were foiled, but wouldn’t be deterred. How’s that song go? You get knocked down, but you get up again, aint ever gonna keep you down. Isn’t that song about alcoholism? Whatever.

“Hm, guess since I can’t trust you on your own, we’ll have to tie you up.”

Oh no. Well, that couldn’t happen, how do you escape when you’re tied up? How do you stab him, shoot him, whateer the fuck you were going to be doing and playing with his blood after like the sick bitch you are with your hands tied. You can’t.

You try to make a break for it, turning to run for the door but with his fast reflexes, Steven grabs your hand and yanks your body until you are pulled flush against him. 

“No more flying away, little dove.” His mouth is on you again and you try to stay focused, try to kiss him so breathless that he lets go, try to distract him enough you can leave… but you find it’s you being swept away as he lays you down on the bed, his warm skin pressed to yours and wastes no time taking off your shirt just before your back hits the bed. With grace, he begins with his fingers at your bare sides, trailing up, up, over your side-boob, onto your arms. You move with him, wanting to encourage the gentle scratch so you raise your arms above your head, relaxing into his touch with your eyes closed. He was so soft, so sure of himself, so in control and tender you almost felt like you were in a lovers arms. With a big sign, you allow yourself to sink into the soft hotel bed, arms raised up so that they brushed the headboard.

The headboard that you now realized you were tied to.

“W-what? What the fuck?” You twist and turn trying to see what the fuck he tied you up in, and when you arch your back to look upside down, you realize you were tied with a strong gauzy material; it looked like what Marc’s suit was made out of. Oh god dammit.

“See love, isn’t this just better?” Steven ran his hands back down your naked top, pulling your shorts and underwear down as he began nestling down on the bed, preparing to lay on his stomach with his head between your legs. “Now just relax, and I’m gonna take care of you and your dripping wet little cunt.”

You tug at the bondage but it’s no use; you’re stuck.

“One more time, little dove.” Steven said as he began to massage your mound, eliciting a sharp gasp. “This what you want?”

Unable to fully response, you simply moan in agreement, until a crisp slap is delivered across your face. “Now, now, darling. Use your words.”

“Yes Daddy”

Steven’s mouth was on you in a second, fully enveloping your puffy, needy pussy that craved him so bad. You were addicted to them, you didn’t foresee this being the last time. It couldn’t be.

It seemed they were just as hungry for you.

Steven ate you out, and you mean ATE, strong arms wrapped around your shaking legs to pin them into place as he devoured the meal in front of him. If you could silence your own heavy breathing and moans enough, you could hear little whimpers escaping Steven’s mouth. Make no mistake, however, he was not submitting to you. Anytime you tried to tell him where to go or move you hips to guide him, you were reminded who was in control with sharp bites to your thighs and tummy.

“I know exactly what I’m doing love, I’m taking my time.”

And take his time he did. Steven sucked and licked and nibbled his way through you, building up the pleasure brick by brick before he ever even slid those fingers inside… and when he did… christ.

Steven knew exactly where he was going when he did, curling them up until he found the spot that made your body jolt upwards. With one arms occupied deep inside you, he was only holding you down with the other and this allowed for more movement… but when you looked down at him, the look in his eyes as he gazed through those thick eyelashes told you that you needed to keep still. You didn’t want to cross him. 

When your orgasm approached, it felt different to say the least, but you assumed the build up and edging was leading to a mind-numbing orgasm. You try to tell him.

“Daddy, daddy I’m gonna- oh fuck- I’m-”

“In my mouth” He pants heavily only breaking away from you for a second. “Need it in my mouth” was all he got out before separating licking between your folds while the slick fingers previous inside you rubbed on your swollen clit.

This was more than a big orgasm, this was something different completely, something wet and filthy and sloppy and it gushed out of you and into Steven’s waiting mouth. He was LOUD, moaning as he drank you down the results of your squirting spilling out all over his mouth. When Steven’s wet face finally came out from between your legs, there was a slight smile on his face and a dark look in his eyes.

Steven was enraptured with you.

“Need to fuck you.” Was the string of words from his wet mouth, coming out so fast it was nearly all strewn in one. Steven scrambled his way up your body and thrust in between your legs so fast, all you could do was cry out for more, more more, until he silenced you with a kiss; mouth still wet from your cum. “Tight little thing” He was breathy, sweat beginning to gather at is skin and his breath hot against your neck. “No longer Marc and Jake risked it all to fuck you, but they didn’t make your squirt, did they?” Steven bit down hard where your neck and shoulder connected. “Did they, little dove?”

“N-no! Oh god, Steven, Steven, Steven- oooohhhh” You neared the edge again, the frantic, desperate way Steven was claiming you taking you to where you needed to be despite the ache and pull on your wrists above you. You tug again, hoping for them to loosen, hoping to find some sort of edge of him, a step ahead, something to get him the way you got Steven and Mark, and looked to the knife on the bed side table. You had to get it somehow.

But Steven noticed, and sat up on his knees, never stopping his movements on you. He followed your eyeline to where the knife lay, and couldn’t help but scoff. “You really think you get to use that on me, do you? Fucking brat!” His hips sped up pace, making you scream, until he got an idea. You did it to Marc, he could do it to you. Steven reaches for the knife. “Might have to teach you a lesson, little dove.”

You know exactly what he’s doing… but you can’t find it in yourself to protest. You want them to own you.

“F-f-fuck, Steven, shit, do it, please! Please Steven!” You beg for him, tears at the edge of your eyes threatening to spill over. 

With a sly grin, Steven traces the edge of the knife over your skin, testing the waters, but when you don’t protest and in fact make sounds of pleasure in time to his frantic thrusts, he presses the knife deeper into you. You can feel the warm blood slowly drip down, staining the sheets that will certainly scare some hotel worker, and the euphoria of the pain sends you barrelings towards the climax. As you near your collective precipice, Steven picks up speed and drops the knife on the bed. Perfect. Once he feels you cumming on his cock, walls pulsing around him, Steven pulls out and jerks himself onto you, painting up your skin.

The picture he paints is soon smeared, Steven slumping over your spent body and taking you in for softer, passionate kisses. As he does, Steven places his hands over your wrists and as soon as the strong gauze-like material releases you from your hold, you quickly attempt to reach for the knife, fully intending on stabbing Steven like you had done to Marc and making a break for it, but Steven and those Moon Knight reflexes caught you.

“Little dove’s wings just can’t be clipped, can they?” He says to you, voice soft and dolly empathetic. He knew what was coming if you didn’t succeed in taking power back.

You smirk up at him. “A girl’s gotta try?”

He smiles back. “I supposed you do. Here.”

Steven grabs your wrists and as the bandaging reappears you think you’re about to go for round 2, but then you feel it, the suit repairing your skin. When they leave for the final time, there is no scar, only left over blood.

Steven leaned over you, both hands pinning your wrists next to your head. “Now, my darling…” He says, cocking his head to the side. “What are we going to do about you?”

*************

WE'RE DOOOOOONNNNNEEE what do you think? Is Steven gonna take her in? it's for you to decide!

I had so much fun with this series! Again, if dark and smi dark interest you consider following my side blog. I ahve a yandere jake and a darkish jake, a D A R K joel series and few others, more coming out

Gotta say, ive been finishing up a lot of series lately that have been hanging around forever and it feels GOOD to get if off my chest.

likes are sweet, reblogs help spread my work and comments mean the entire world!

@my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction @fieryglutenfreechickennoodles @luke-o-lophus @milkymoon2483 @kittyofalltrades @luciannadraven33 @the-fox-den @gingermous @jake-g-lockley @sofi786 @lunar-ghoulie @stealfromthedevil @pimosworld @stevengrcnt @80pairsofcrocs @kingtwhiddleston @marys2sblog @ahookedheroespureheart @drinkingwithkhonshu @fandxmslxt69 @k-ra @ivystoryweaver @whatthefishh @steven-grants-world @campingwiththecharmings @littlenosoul @mikaelak @runa-falls @lokisv7lkyrie

[ramblers-lets-get-ramblin]

Surrendered Innocence- Chapter Four

Please check series warnings! Be warned: they do contain spoilers for future chapters!

Series Masterlist

Pairing: Joel Miller x f!babysitter

Summary: Joel surprises you on your day off

Word Count: 2555

Rating: E MDNI 18+

You wake late in the morning. It's Saturday so you have the day off from babysitting. Joel works on the weekends sometimes but Mrs. Miller never does. Your sister has an away game and your parents go to all of her games so you have the house to yourself. Funny, that Joel calls you Angel. Your sister is the real angel in your parents eyes. She does no wrong, and you do no right. 

You stretch and rise from your bed. You're only wearing underwear and a Miller Contracting shirt you snagged from Joel. He doesn't know you have it but he has about 20 of them so he'll never even miss it. You like sleeping with his scent invading your nostrils. You body wrapped in something that his once was. It almost feels like he's there next to you, embracing you. It almost feels like you could be a normal couple. 

Even though you’d love for him to be able to show you off, the idea of sneaking around really does get you going. Stolen kisses and hidden caresses. The fact that you could easily be caught at any moment. You cross your room into the Jack and Jill bathroom you share with your sister and turn the shower on. You take off Joel’s shirt and return to your bedroom to gather your clothes. The hot water feels heavenly cascading over your body. The way Joel manhandles you sets your blood on fire but also leaves your skin stinging and your muscles aching. Just thinking of his rough hands roaming your body has the now familiar coil of tension building. You’ve never felt desire like this before. Sure there have been boys that you thought were cute. You had wondered what their lips would feel like against yours. But you’d never wanted like this before, hungered. 

As you are drying off in the bathroom you hear a noise in the house. It can’t be your parents, they aren’t due to return until late tonight. It’s probably just the house settling, you tell yourself, though you remain unconvinced. You wrap the towel around yourself and open the door a crack. You don’t hear anything else so you open the door the rest of the way. You step warily into your bedroom and there it is again. Another creak. Your breath begins coming in shallow pants and your heart is pounding so hard you think it might break through your chest. You step into the hall and creep slowly towards the living room. The only thought in your head is “I hope they locked the door behind them.” 

You reach the end of the hallway and just as you begin to peek around the corner, a hand clamps over your mouth and another grabs your waist, pulling you tightly against a broad chest. Your eyes go wide and you try to scream but the air has all escaped your lungs. You feel a mouth next to your ear, breathing heavily into it. “Calm down, Angel. It’s jus’ me.” The drawl you’ve come to love whispers to you. Suddenly, the hands holding you release you and you whirl around to see Joel with a mischievous grin and a dark glint in his eyes. 

“Joel! You scared the shit out of me!” You swat at his arm and he laughs as he scoops you up. “What are you doing here?” You ask. He raises an eyebrow at you. “What? I can’t come visit my girl when I’m missin’ her?” He pouts mockingly. “Of course you can. A call or text would be nice, though. Ya know so I dont think I’m about to get murdered.” He chuckles again while he fingers the top of your towel. “I’m sorry, baby. I thought you would think it was funny.” 

“I thought you were working today.” You say. “That’s just what I told her so she wouldn’t bother me. Now I’ve got the whole day to spend with you, Angel.” He presses a kiss into your temple. “Why don’t you show me your bedroom?” He asks. You shake your head and tighten your towel around your chest and lead him back down the dark hall. As soon as you cross the threshold to your bedroom he spins you around and picks you up, yanking the towel off you as he does. His lips find yours and he carries you to your dresser, setting you down gently on top. Then he drops to his knees and gently parts your knees. “You know what, baby? I didn’t have any breakfast this mornin’, and I am starvin’.” he says. He nuzzles the inside of your thigh. He kisses the top of your mound and inhales your scent deeply. You smell different than usual. Slowly he parts your lips with his thumbs and is greeted by the sight of you already glistening for him. He loves knowing that he can work you up so much, so quickly. Just a few sweet words and he has you in the palm of his hand, dripping for him. 

He places a few soft kisses to your clit and shudders when he sees you clench around nothing. “Please, baby.” You beg, your fingers tug lightly on his hair and he groans. You’ve gotten more confident in asking for what you want from him, and he eats it up. Sure, the shy, virginal thing was cute at first. More than cute it was fucking hot, knowing that you were untouched, pure. Just knowing that you were waiting for him to stretch you out, fill you up, gets his cock harder than it's ever been with his wife. But this, you asking him for what you need, sends a pang of desire through his whole body. He drops down lower onto the floor and places his tongue directly underneath your dripping entrance. He pinches and rolls your clit expertly between his fingers. He’s done this enough by now that he knows exactly what buttons to press to have you shaking for him. Soon you are gushing directly onto his waiting tongue, where he laps up every single drop. You taste different, too, he thinks. Usually you have a sweet sort of salty taste to you. But now, its all sugary sweetness. And its all for him. He doesn’t let a single drop of your fear laced release go to waste. 

Once you’ve stopped shaking Joel rises to his full height and stick his still dripping tongue directly into your mouth. You moan loudly at the taste of yourself on him and suck his tongue deeper into your mouth. Joel seems to like it so much you do it again. Sucking his tongue in deep and letting him pull it back out. You swallow every moan he lets out for you, the sounds going straight to your still fluttering cunt. 

When he pulls back to catch his breath you plant both hands on his chest and walk him backwards a few steps. You hop down from the dresser and grab the hem of his t-shirt. Now it's Joel’s turn to be surprised. You remove his shirt and toss it over your shoulder. You lick the bead of sweat that has settled into the deep hollow of his throat. You kiss your way down his broad, strong chest. You softly bite the swell of his stomach that bulges the tiniest bit over the top of his jeans. You lick the trail of hair that leads from his belly button down below his pants. Joel's breath begins to stutter as you work open the button of his jeans and unzip them, never ceasing your worship of his belly. You'd heard the swipes she had taken at him. The comments she made about him gaining weight. It was no wonder he didn't want to fuck her anymore. You want to make him feel as sexy as he is. Make him feel appreciated, loved even. 

You hook your hands in the waistband of both his jeans and his underwear and pull them down slowly, continuing to kiss the trail of hair as you expose it. You pull them down just enough so that his cock and heavy balls are exposed to you. You wrap your hand around the warm length of him and look up at him through your lashes. Joe has a look in his eyes of pure adoration. "Ya sure 'bout this, Angel?" He rasps. He looks as fucked out as you usually feel. You nod up at him. "I've never done it before, baby. You'll have to show me how." You feel his cock twitch in your hand. "I'll show you how, darlin'." 

"See that skin there? He asks. When you nod in response he adds, "pull it back  all the way down. Gently." You do as he says and the moan that falls from his mouth goes straight through to the core of you. "Now spit on it." He instructs. You let the saliva pool on your mouth and instead of spitting, you open your mouth and stick your tongue out. A long line of spit drips down onto the flushed tip on him. "Fuck, baby." He gravels. "Just like that. Good fucking girl." 

He places his hands on the sides of your head, behind your ears. "Open up wide for me, Angel." And then he guides your open, waiting mouth to his throbbing cock. It's quite the stretch to fit him all inside, the corners of your mouth sting with it. "Now close your lips." He begins to slowly thrust in and out your mouth, using your head as leverage. Shallow at first, but going a little deeper every time. He hisses when your teeth scrape him. "Watch the teeth, baby." He warns, gently. You open your jaw wider while keeping your lips firmly sealed around him. "That's right, my love. You're doing so good for me." His praise makes your clit throb with need. You clench your thighs together, the friction easing some of the pressure. 

As soon as he hits the back of your throat you gag and tears spring from your eyes. The sounds of your struggle have his pace faltering. You can feel him twitching inside your mouth. "One day I'm gonna teach you how to swallow me, baby. So I can fuck this pretty throat properly." You hum in response and the vibrations send him over the edge. "I'm gonna cum, Angel. When I tell you to, you get ready to swallow." You look up at him and nod as best you can with your mouth stuffed full. His hips stutter as his climax closes in. "Now, swallow." He pulls out slightly and you open your throat. "Fuckfuckfuck." He growls out as his warm release hits your throat and you swallow it down. There's so much cum that it dribbles out of your mouth around him. It drips down to your naked breasts and the sight of you covered in him, stuffed with cock is almost too much for Joel. He slips out of your mouth with a hiss and pulls you to your feet. He grabs your cheeks and pulls you into him. He kisses you deeply, not caring about his cum still drying on your lips. 

He walks you backwards over to the bathroom, lips never leaving yours. He turns the shower on and begins to strip. In the shower he washes his cum out of your hair. With your back to his chest he murmurs praise in your ear. "You make me so happy, Angel." He says. When he's done rinsing the conditioner out he kisses your neck. "I love you, baby. I jus' wanna be with you all the time." His voice is almost a whisper, now. You shudder both from the feel of his lips on the sensitive skin and hearing your own feelings reciprocated. You turn and link your hands behind his neck. "I love you, too, Joel." A few tears slip from your eyes that he brushes away with his knuckles. 

Later that night when you settle into bed, you can't help but imagine a future with Joel. You and him, the girls, maybe a few kids of your own. You try to shake the thoughts from your mind  knowing they can never be. The loss of your imaginary life with him leaves a dull ache in your chest. 

Joel arrives home at his normal time. His wife is at the stove, serving his plate. She greets him with a smile and a kiss, like always. She asks about his day and her smile brightens when he tells her it was the best he’s had in a good while. She’s noticed how happy he’s been lately. And she uses that to her advantage. When Joel is happy he makes her happy. After the girls have had their baths and been put to bed she watches her husband undress with hungry eyes. Of course, he notices. “See somethin’ you like, baby?” He asks. She nods, biting her lip. “Well, come on, then. Come get it.” 

She crawls across the bed to his side. She runs her hands up his chest. She pauses for a moment when she spies a faint red mark on the golden skin of his collarbone. “What’s this?” She asks. Joel looks down and mentally curses. “A two by four got me today. ‘S alright darlin’. Didn’t hurt me none.” She seems to accept his lie. “Poor baby.” She croons as she kisses the mark gently. But he doesn’t see the look on her face when his eyes roll back in his head. All he can think about is his Angel, kissing him in just the same way earlier. She knows more about her husband than she lets on. Her parents would disown her if she ever even said the word divorce out loud. And without their support or Joel’s income, she’d never be able to raise her girls on her own. 

She realizes now what’s got him in such a good mood lately. She wonders who it is that her husband is fucking. Some cute young thing, she’s sure. Just like the last one. Earlier today, when she was at Zilker Park with Sarah and Ellie, she saw a little boy on the playground. He had deep brown eyes and his curly hair was so brown it was almost black. His mother called his name and when she scooped him up in her arms, Jess let her eyes rake over the woman. She was in her early to mid twenties. She had a face like an angel and a body Jess would kill to have. As she often does when she sees a kid with curly brown hair, she caught herself wondering if that little boy’s dad could be her husband. 

Joel fucks his wife from behind as he always does. He pushes her face into mattress and tries to imagine what it would feel like to have his Angel like this. Speared onto his cock as he unloads inside her tight pussy. As much as he hates to, he pulls out and finishes on her ass. She doesn’t get this part of him anymore. After they’ve cleaned up and settled into their beds, they face away from each other. Joel thinks of Angel, and though she doesn’t know it, Jess thinks of her too. 

Taglist: @xanqels @joeldjarin @livingdeadmaria @pedritosgfreal @romanarose @megamindsecretlair @anxiousnoodles @cesspitoflove @biwitchy @morgaussy @sheepdogchick3 @lumoverheaven @marisemonteiroo @littlebunnybigheartfics @xkyxkyxxlylcylulucuflfluclu @beccerjune @jenispunk @basicoccult @disassociation-daydreams @tloubarbie @walkintotheriveranddisappear @amanitacowboy @cool-iguana @bastardmandennis

[sketchquill]

YOOOOOOOOO! FIRST YOU GOTTA BE ONE IF THE MOST TALENTED ARTIST I HAVE EVER SEEN!! SECOND YOUR GHOST OF CHRISTMAS FUTURE IS GIVING ME BRAIN ROT! And it got me thinking!

This being inspired by art that I just literally saw a minute ago by alice angel12x! With their idea of ghost of Christmas present yn!

The scene

Frank could only look at the ghost with fear as he watched them grow older by the minute. The once bright and cheerful spirit that stood tall among the crowd now appeared centuries older, their wooden skin was chipping and rotting away like an ancient oak that had been left to grow on dying soil their labored breaths showed how tired they had became but their hood hid their face from the puppet leaving his blind to their appearance but he was certain that it had changed as well. His heart ached for the spirits well being, it was thanks to them that he was able to see the warmth of the town surrounding him for so many years, a warmth that soaked deep into his bones that he never wished to forget.

He knelt down by the spirits slumped formed worry and fear filling his eyes " spirit? Please say something! Is there anything I can do?" He asked, he begged, for as much as he knew the truth, he wanted to remain naive for a little longer.

" I'm afraid cough! There isn't much you can do for a spirit dear frank, my being is far beyond your control. Its my own fault really, I saw hiw happy you were seeing everyone that I had forgotten my own limits and now I fear my time has come"

You spoke as if it was the most obvious thing in the world as tears slowly stared to fill franks eyes. "N-no please please this cant be! There must be something I can do!" For the first time in years frank is willing to put someone else's well being above his, the idea made you smiled weakly underneath your hood.

"Theres a heart underneath that all that doom and gloom after all huh? Thank you dear frank but im afraid im already gone" you glance up at the swirling snow that surround the both of you. While frank paid no mind to it, you watched as the wind grew more aggressive causing the most beautiful sight before you mixing with the cruel glow of a blue haunting light.

" My darling, you're already here? Im afraid im worst for wear" you spoke to the air it seemed as you forced yourself to stand up. Frank tried to get a hold on your arm to held you steady yourself only for your arm to shattered into dying splinters that blew away with the wind.

Frank finally noticed the blue glow when it suddenly became like a large bonefire at the destruction of your arm but you could inky laugh as you walked on shaking legs, knocking your hollow knees together with each step.

"No there's no need for that! You cant blame a boy for not knowing, there is so much for him to learn and it is best that you take me place dont you?"

You spoke with confidence as you pulled down your hood causeing frank to lose his breath. Your once beautiful hair made of leaves had disappeared and wilted into brown dying vines that left you into a balding state, cracking lines spread across your face their source was from the now empty socket that once held one of your bright warmth filled eyes.

You look up at the hooded figure without any source of fear or worry in your entire body, something that frank was envy about as he felt fear shake his entire soul at the towering figure.

Your remaining arm reached up to the figures face, reaching into the inky blackness of the hood with some effort revealed the soft gaze of a yellow felt face that looked down at the spirit of christmas present with warmth and sadness within his eyes.

" what-what is this?" Frank asked in a shaking voice but you only could chuckle.

"No one can help who they love frank, be they a puppet or a spirit such as us. There will always be something that will block then from one another" it was almost like you were speaking with the wind, your voice rising and falling with each sound.

You slowly turned your body more fragile than a porcelain doll would as your body slowly splintered and cracked more but a smile filled with warmth still remained on your face, as if he wasnt the cause for your breaking state.

"My last kindness and his warning frank frankly, this could be your last Christmas."

You shattered, bits of wood and cloth blew through the raging wind turning into small sparks of light that were swallowed by the darkness of the winter night. Frank could only stare in awe at the sight of your dissapearing form unaware of the tears that slowly left the hooded figures eyes.

I GOT REALLY INTO THIS AND I DONT CARE MY BRAIN JUICE WAS FLOWING! I HOPE YOU LIKE IT AND I HOPE YOU DONT MIND THE SMALL ROMANCE I GAVE TO GHOST WALLY AND YN! THANK YOU AND GOOD NIGHT!

IM GOING FERAL OVER THIS HOLY JESUS THIS IS AWESOME I LOVED EVERY SECOND OF READING THIS LIKE- AAAAA AND THE LIL’ MOMENT BETWEN GHOST OF CHRISTMAS PRESENT! Y/N AND GHOST OF YET TO COME! WALLY BEFORE Y/N SHATTERS IS SO UNDENIABLY SWEET BUT OH MY GOD IT PULLED AT MY HEART STRINGS 😭💕💖

@alice-angel12x ALICE GET OVER HERE YOU GOTTA GET OVER HERE AND READ THIS BRO 👏

[aziraphales-library]

Hi! I was wondering if you knew a fic where Muriel and Crowley are just like,, hanging out? Or if the soho gang (nina and maggie) comfort crowley or something? I really liked their dynamic in season two so I was wondering if there were any fics like that. thanks so much!!

Hello! We have a #crowley & muriel tag with a couple of posts. Here are some fics to add where Crowley spends time with Muriel, Nina, and Maggie...

The recovery of a bog body by Joseph_Amadeus (G)

On the third day of sitting in his car at the bottom of the Border Mires Crowley receives a prophetic vision — Dorothy Zbornak of The Golden Girls appears next to him, all gray curls and no-shit-taking attitude, and reminds him, as kindly as she can, that one shouldn't turn mourning into a way of life

Muriel And The Art Of Bookshop Maintenance by cosmic_day (G)

Muriel has taken over the bookshop, and is doing their best to run it, with helpful advice from Maggie and Nina, and occasional visits from the depressed demon who seems to come in a package deal with the bookshop. And for the first time in their life, they’re reading a book, a book called The Crow Road. All of it is new, and exciting, and wonderful, but it is quite a lot for one 37th class scrivener to handle.

Angels Like These by slapsticks (T)

They shifted back as Crowley stood up, smiling, "You know what? Forget about–all of this, Constable, I think I'll be going now." He declared, shoving the teacup into the startled officer's hands. "You know me, I've got errands, that terrible demon-y stuff," The cup and saucer clanked together as Muriel struggled to hold them. "But – you just arrived," They protested, almost sadly. "I'm..." The words died on their tongue. "Mhm, yeah-huh," Replied Crowley, hardly listening, or at least trying not to, sauntering towards the doors. "Nice seeing you – now, goodbye, for the forseeable future." "The forseeable future?" "For the forseeable future, Inspector!" in which crowley begins to form an unlikely bond with nina, maggie, and muriel ! birthday gift for my good buddy pal bro frank who basically wrote the last couple interactions with me and inspired the whole fic . i might be too dedicated. I Dont Care. happy birthday bro

In Nothing Else So Happy by Ducks Have Ears (NR)

"I count myself in nothing else so happy, as in a soul remembering my good friends." Richard II, Act 2, Scene 3 - Shakespeare Crowley had only ever had one friend and he was beginning to realise that maybe one friend simply wasn't enough. (Part two of the Crowley & Friends series)

That's What Friends Do by Barbarian_MP (NR)

Nina had found him, coming around the corner on her bicycle and at first not being at all surprised to see the car parked in front of her shop. The car seemed to be in that very spot on the daily. Little early for it to be there, sure, but maybe it had been there all night. She wasn’t all that worried about it until she noticed the car’s owner was inside, unmoving.

The F-Word by haleinedelail (T)

Post Series 2, how the living f**k is Crowley ever going to find solace or comfort? Whiskey? Coffee? Cursing? Antisocial behavior? Yes, all of the above. But HOPE is a puzzle that we all must put back together multiple times throughout our lives, and demons are no different. He will find it again, but it might take a village to get all the pieces together.

- Mod D

[thighguys]

alright guys i took the cue from everyone else on here and did my own dnp tarot reading 😊 @freckliedan i think you were collecting these? might as well add mine for the metrics lol... also i will take this opportunity to advertise the @dnptarot project im putting together, it's super cool!!!

okay so i used my fav tarot app as i dont actually have any physical sets lol but heres what ive got

my first 4 cards were just dan and phil vibe checks, like what are their general feelings. dans were the 9 of swords and the knight of swords.

9 of swords is definitely a negative card, lots of anxiety and fear swirling around something, but the knight appearing with it seems to me to imply just like- pushing through the fear. honestly reminds me of the time just before basically im gay, dan is scared but forging onward. knight of swords also implies a very fast pace, like things are moving really quickly which is DEFINITELY true and also matches with dans "what comes straight after" tweet. too many planets aligning at once etc, lots of shit is going DOWN lmao

phils cards were the king of wands and the 5 of pentacles.

king of wands is VERY leader/making big decisions/creative director, which makes me think that hes got something in the works here that hes going to be a big part of creating/directing (pride month mayhaps??) its also very much an opportunity card, like here is something that he can take and make great coming soon. 5 of pentacles honestly took me a minute to think about because usually its more about financial loss? but im thinking its maybe more about recognizing the necessity of help from others in difficult times. idk phil is getting help and is also a king 💪💪

my next question was about whether dnp were planning something big soon, and i pulled the high priestess and the 8 of wands

high priestess is literally ALL about trusting your intuition, and 8 of wands is once again very fast paced movement and changes approaching. so what im getting is a RESOUNDING yes lmao... phannies trust your intuition, the universe is telling us something and we should trust that itll come and itll come quickly lol

my last question was specifically about whether dnp are getting married lol (sorry cant help it im still on wedding hill) and i pulled the queen of swords and the 6 of cups

GOD this is insane to me... queen of swords to me is clarity and truth. every time ive pulled this card before it has been a reassurance to trust what i know and my ability to see whats in front of me... wedding hill... truth... idk guys... and then 6 of cups is all joy and happy memories (also can mean children? phregnancy announcement?) and what could be more joyful than a marriage? anyway once again these two cards are just a resounding yes so... im not pretending to know anything about their private lives but the cards havent lied yet lmao...

overall im just seeing a lot of fast moving cards and a LOT of positivity, creativity, and joy. the only negative card shown was in dans vibe check and that fits, but along with his other card i feel like the vibe i was getting was less "crippling fear" and more "brave enough to keep going anyway". basically i think we can expect smth big soon, and if it isnt a marriage announcement then ill stay on wedding hill until i die because i believe that the queen of swords knows wtf shes talking about ❤️❤️❤️

hope you guys liked this! if you want i can do more tarot readings in the future? lmk lol, or dm me if you want me to do readings for you... i really like doing them i love feeling connected to the universe

[nanistar]

may i ask why you hate mapleshade? like is it more of a fandom thing/author thing or do you just not like her character? sorry if thats a weird question lol

i think the idea behind her character is cool but the erins are the erins and they fucked it up imo. also the way the fandom treats any discussion about her and other characters in her book is so annoying i cannot stand going into the mapleshade tag on tumblr

which is a shame cause like i said, i really like the concept of her character and i feel like it had alot of potentional

not a weird question, i get it. i gotta start by saying i have no ill will against people who like mapleshade or even like the points i'm about to say. btw! sorry this is long i got really into it

starting chronologically (according to canon, not publication)(publication order is: all ivypool darkforest books (2011 and prev) crookeds promise (2011), great battle (last hope 2012, she permadies here) and maples vengeance (2015)

i actually really liked mapleshade's vengeance, all things considered. it comes last in the mapleshade storyline according to publication date, and up until then we really didn't know much about her, and i believe this is where she gets a personality other than "random DF lady" and "rude ghost villain". the erins are not good writers by any means, but i felt that mapleshade's internal monologue and the way she saw the world was genuinely pretty decent. they portrayed her as obsessive and manipulative and as an unreliable narrator. it was one of the first books i read upon returning to the fandom in 2018 and it was a thrill to read, because i hadn't been spoiled on it.

the erins have a habit of writing surprise/accidental pregnancies as plot points, which has the implication of like… flings/one night stands. it's best not to think about it. it's pretty obvious upfront that appledusk is not as in to her as she is in to him, but she doesn't see it. she talks about him in her narrations as a sweet and loving man and talks about their family and future together, but when we the readers finally see him, he's calloused and doesn't really care about her. i think she even sees him with reedshine at a gathering and gets mad before she thinks "oh he's just doing that so no one gets suspicious" (not quoting or anything, i havent read the novel since 2018) girl. their relationship was obviously just a fling to him, but to her they were in love. i liked the way this was written as opposed to all the other times in warriors weve seen a man have a hissy fit because a girl rejected him. (ashfur is the glaring example but also crowfeather, brambleclaw) her denial and refusal to accept what she was seeing (that she was the side piece) was the interesting part.

she has her children and then ravenwing spills the beans. why on earth would he do that? why would it benefit the clan or anyone? from a logistical standpoint, thunderclan lost 3 potential new warriors and mapleshade never implied she was going to riverclan. anyway, he didn't even have proof. he just assumed. i think he rightfully got what was coming for him, since if he would have kept his mouth shut, 7 cats including himself wouldn't have died. sorry mini rant i don't like him. anyway we know the rest of the story. kits die, maple kills ravenwing for telling her secret, she kills frecklewish for not helping (no, she couldn't have jumped in to save the kits without probably dying herself but she COULD have stood up for maple in thunderclan, and she was upstream so she could have yelled out and warned maple of the flood but im NOT getting into that and i dont care) and then she goes to kill reedshine but kills appledusk instead. did he deserve it? he was kinda a dick but mapleshade was like stalker-obsessed with him (i think she uses the phrase "my appledusk" in her narration but i might be wrong) after what was ostensibly a one night stand. perchpaw wounds mapleshade to the point where once she flees the scene, she dies of blood loss. cool

the story of a mothers love (and a mother's loss) is an age-old tale. in a franchise where all female characters are doomed to become boring cookie-cutter mothers, this loss and violent rage was awesome.

everyone told me to read crookedstar's promise, because it was the best super edition. i.. do not agree with that. tbh i thought it was long and boring and went nowhere. crookedstar suffered many tragedies in his life, and he lost everyone he loved, and then the book suddenly ends with him going "im ok (:" and dying. (i was reading a pdf and not a physical copy so it was VERY abrupt for me. i legit sat there like.. so that's it? i read 500+ pages for that?) i can't really blame mapleshade for this (since shes not real) but it does factor in. her idea of revenge against appledusk was to torture an injured baby? who then grew up and had no idea who the fuck appledusk was? why not raise him and give him the love he craved so that when the time came, he would be more likely to do her bidding?? her motives here make no sense. not super important. anyway.

and then she's seen occasionally in the dark forest and she tries to drown ivypaw for no reason once. idk she was obviously just a background character in these scenes (since they came first) but the fans saw a female in the dark forest and were like. thank god a woman. can you blame them. then the erins built her up from that.

anyway mapleshade has this generations long story of manipulating younger cats, and a POV book where she's obviously obsessive, controlling, stalkerish and chooses brutally uncommon violence as a way to get back at those who wrong her. (she unburies ravenwing's body so crows can eat it, and she uses adders to kill frecklewish, despite the fact the snakes could easily go for her.) she puts HERSELF in danger to do these things because she's impulsive, she justifies all her actions to herself by saying its revenge for her children and in the end, she pushes the last remnants of the kittens she thinks she's fighting for away. this is a cool story about a woman who's pushed to the edge and takes everyone down with her. for ONCE its not a man with deadwifepain.

and what does the fandom do

they girlbossify her. they fight over if she's in the wrong or not (she is. she killed people.) they take everything about her that made her compelling and turn her into "grr my husband cheated on me and me kids are dead. sad." she gets turned into the most basic, boring, cookie cutter "evil" lady. she kills people for fun and not because she had a reason to or a goal (in her mind). she suffers the most tragic kind of loss that there is and gets no time to grieve before she is run out of her home, and her reaction to this is pure RAGE, and the fandom turns her into this boring, slay QUEEN!!! (not the pregnant cat kind), always been evil, always been hardcore, ~So CrAzY~, "my eyeliner is sharp to stab men" girlboss. where's the nuance. where's the passion!!? she's a miserable, impulsive, manipulating failure. she blames others for her mistakes and bad judgment and punishes others for her shortfallings. she can't be vulnerable and broken, she can only cry because dead kids and then kill evil husband and evil husbands wife. she's even sometimes portrayed as like "boss" of the dark forest, wrangling all the men. barf.

so to answer your question, it's the general fandom* portrayal that i hate, but i honestly wouldn't trust the erins with her at this point. (the erins are influenced by their fans, for example (old person voice) back in my day, firestar and scourge being brothers was just a fan theory.) i'm glad they permakilled her in the great battle so they cant bring her back to ruin anything. actually thinking about her to write this out and reflect on why i don't like her made me sympathize for her. i like text mapleshade with a little bit of fanon sprinkled in for flavor.

and hey. usually when the fandom adopts a character, they're right. the fandom likes to get really in to random bg/side characters and give them lives they would never have in canon. but sadly (or not, depending on your opinion), when those get popular and breach containment, they spread everywhere and suddenly people think this IS canon. look at how many of us thought that brambleclaw killed hawkfrost directly after he killed hollyleaf, because that was the easy way to portray the great battle in MAPs, only to have someone point out, years after this has become the common sequence of events, that brambleclaw actually hunts him down, brings him back to camp, and then murders him POW style!!!

*btw. im in no way saying that all mapleshade-based projects or aus or whatever are bad, even if she is sexy girlboss in them. some of my favorite maps portray her like that.

anyway. TLDR:

everyone say "i'm sorry mapleshade"

[leoslosttoolbelt]

What I think the demigods would major as and why

these are personal head canons dont take them too seriously :)

Percy: Education. I know that we usually hc as a Marin biology kinda guy but I genuinely think that he wouldn't be too fond of the workload but instead want to work towards being a teacher and being the kind of teacher he needed as a kid, y'know? Alternatively, I can see him being into something like baking and pastry art to take over Sally's shop.

Annabeth: Architecture. I really don't think I need to explain this one to y'all but yeah she's an architecture girly. But if we want to branch out I can also see her studying law and working in the area of Child Protection.

Leo: Astrophysics. I have this head canon of him panicking because of the sheer amount of choices that he's presented with and choosing the first one of the alphabetical list. Lucky for him, he's insanely good at it AND it'll pay well in the future. He minors in mechanical engineering and realises that although he has all the practical knowledge because of his father, his theoretical knowledge isn't as strong lol.

Piper: Food Science. I'm trying to be unique here because yeah, she could do environmental studies but I also think it would be super cool to see her learning about food and developing new vegetarian versions of food because it's something she's visibly passionate about in the books.

Nico: I can see him getting a history / philosophy related degree for his bachelors just for him to get a  doctor of philosophy (Ph. D.) in mythology or folklore. His hyperfixation runs deep and he sure as hell is going to fuel it as much as he can.

Jason: Doesn't go to college!! Is severely burnt out <3. No but like idk man I think he'd legitimately want to take it chill if that makes sense? Maybe he'd do a business major just so that he can get a job somewhere but I can't think of somewhere he'd fit in nicely. Jason does have a lot of part time jobs though!!

Frank: Nurse! Nursing school! Despite being the son of Mars I can see him being in the medical field because he wants to help people in need. It's a long journey with lots of ups and downs but finally getting his degree makes it all worth it.

Hazel: Geology because rocks. And also women in STEM!! This one directly correlates to her powers in the books as well as both of her parents! On the other hand, I can see definitely see Hazel studying in the field of archeology with the goal of being an archeologist and then eventually a museum curator :)

Reyna: Psychology!! Listen, I know this seems out of the blue but Reyna gives me the right vibes. Everyone is skeptical at first because they don't think she'd fit the mold of a clinical psychologist but that's okay because Reyna wants to further herself in research! She studies Neuropsychology and becomes a prominent researcher in her field! Please tell me you see the vision.

Will: From what I can see in the books, Emergency Medical Services degree seems like the right field for him. He's already basically a paramedic at Camp Half Blood so he knows it's naturally the right step for him. On the other hand, for something a little different - he seems like the kind of guy who might be interested in studying cinematography or art history maybe.

Travis: He studies Economics because he's so fucking convinced that he can become the next Elon Musk if he studies this. Alternatively, he studies music because he wants to travel the world and like sing with the wind and all that shit.

Connor: he's a communications major because he's a really popular youtube and technically doesn't really need to go to college but oh well he can study communications.

Drew: She goes to cosmetology school as the first step to start her own makeup and skincare empire. She's super nice to all of her clients and helps out all of the other students when they're having trouble with something! I will not tolerate any Drew slander let my girl breathe.

Pollux: Chemical Engineering. He got influenced by watching breaking bad and somehow landed himself a degree in chemical engineering. He doesn't know how he survived that degree but it doesn't matter because he decides to not give a fuck and open a coffee shop that becomes really popular because all the drinks are to die for.

Thalia: I don't really know the right terminology but she has an art related degree / tattoo apprentice so that she can work as a tattoo artist!! It fits with the thalis vision and also she is the eldest daughter who loses it lowkey so she doesn't follow your usual education route. Tattoo artist Thalia for the win!!

[lildrabbles]

Chapter 7: Family Meeting

2007! Raphael x Female! Reader

Summary: Despite Raph's protests, hes made to bring you back to the lair to meet his family.

A/N: HELLO EVERYONE IM SO SORRY I HAVNT BEEN UPDATING, since school started i just kinda lost motivation to write BUT IVE CAME BACK. I cant say for sure how long youll have to wait in the future, cuz i have a problem with writers block. Also, this is a lot longer than most of my chapters, so enjoy!! But let me know if you like the longer chapters or shorter ones <3

Raph didn't want his brothers to meet her. They would embarrass the hell outta him! 'What do I care...' he told himself, but deep down inside he couldn't stop the dread. He stared at the stove while he ate his Corn Pops aggressively.

"Dude, what did those Corn Pops do to you?" Mikey said, laughing as he poked raphs side.

Raph quickly grabbed his finger and twisted it, causing Mikey to yelp and beg for mercy. Raph scoffed and let go, going back to eating his Corn Pops. When he was finished he stood up, making his way over to the sink to wash his bowl and spoon.

"So are you going to call her?" Donnie asked as he grabbed a poptart from the cabinet.

"I'm gonna text her to meet me." Raph said, not looking at him as he dried the bowl.

Donnie chuckled. "If only Leo were here to meet your girlfriend."

Raph was about to threaten him, but the mention of his eldest brother stopped him. He glared down at the spoon he held, not saying anything.

"Uh... sorry about bringing that up." Donnie cringed in on himself.

Raph scoffed. "Dont be. It's not like he's comin back anytime soon." He said dryly.

Donnie sighed. After a couple moments, Mikey piped up. "Dude, suddenly it got like, really tense in here."

Raph rolled his eyes as he turned around and leaned against the counter. "Blame Donnie."

"I apologised!" Don protested.

Raph sighed before placing the bowl back up in the cabinet. “I’m goin to the dojo to work out.” Before turning around and walking away, not waiting for any reply.

He was finishing beating the crap out of his punching bag before he felt light headed. He exhaled and collapsed onto the bench, grimacing at the sharp pain in his wound. When Donnie mentioned Leo it got his blood to boil. God, even thinking about him made him pissed. Who was Leo to think he could just leave his family, his own flesh and blood, just because he “didn’t feel good enough”? 

Didn’t he fcking know that he was the best fighter out of them all?! He was truly selfish. And before he left, Raph may have started an argument, which yes he shouldn't have done, but then Leo started going on about how Raph was selfish and that only his own opinion mattered! Can you believe the audacity of that turtle?!

He grunted as he took a swig from his water bottle, grabbing the cloth beside him to wipe all of the sweat off his forehead. Raph glanced down at his phone, looking at the time. It was currently 4 pm. He wanted to wait a bit longer until it got dark to meet up with her, but decided to text her sooner so she had some notice. 

He texted her to meet him in an alleyway where he knew wasn't far from her apartment and had a sewer entrance so they could easily get in and out without getting noticed. He also made sure to mention to come alone.

When she didn't respond right away, Raph decided to do some sit ups. After a couple of those, he heard his phone vibrate on the bench. He sat up and grabbed it, and read Y/N's message.

Y/N: ok what time? My shifts already over so I'm not worried

He chuckled at how she didn't even question it. Silly girl.

Raph: How about in half an hour?

Y/N: Sounds good to me! See you then

Raph sighs, then stands up, stretching and drinking the last of his water. Time to go make sure she gets there safely.

----------------------------------------------------------

You didn't have to wait that long in the alleyway for him. You stood and looked around, double checking this was the right alleyway. Yep, it was.

Since it was a bit chilly, every time you let out a breath a little cloud formed.

Before you could even call out, you heard a soft thump behind you. You jumped slightly, spinning around. A small smile erupted on your face as you saw Raph emerge from the shadows.

"Hey, Raph." You look back towards the sidewalk to make sure no one would see you both.

"Hey." He smiled. "Okay, so uh… you probably wanna know why I brought you here right?"

"Right." You agreed.

"My family wants to meet you. Sensei mostly wants to meet you because he wants to know if he can trust you with our secret."

"O-oh!" Your eyes widen slightly. "So I get to meet your family?"

"Yeah. But…"

You frowned slightly. "What is it?"

You then gasped when Raph leaned towards you and in a flash, your vision was dark. You felt him tying a piece of fabric around your eyes. 

"Raph, don't you think you're taking this too fast? I'm not into this kinda thing." Despite the shock of him doing this, you couldn't help making a cheeky joke while you giggled.

Even though you couldn't see him, his eyes widened as a blush erupted from his face. He frowned. "I-its not fcking like that!!" You could hear in his that he was flustered, causing you to giggle more.

You felt strong arms pick you up, but you weren't that alarmed because you recognised they were Raph's. You heard him grumbling to himself.

 You clinged onto his neck despite his firm grip on you.

"I'm only doin this cuz we can't risk you knowin our location yet." Raph blushed and grimaced slightly as your arms wrapped around his neck.

"Oh… well I guess I can understand that."

You suddenly felt the wind rush around you both and you let out a little squeal, feeling a little nauseous. You heard Raph's feet thump on the ground softly, meaning he had jumped down somewhere.

The more he walked, a disgusting smell assaulted your nose. You scrunched up your nose. "Are we in the sewers?"

"Yeah." Raph laughed watching your reaction.

You nod slightly, nose still scrunched up. After a couple more moments of walking, you felt him stop and he placed you on your feet.

You heard some shuffling and then a crash, followed by an "oof!". 

"Am I allowed to take this off now..?" You asked, directed towards Raphael.

 He grunted in response which you took as a yes, so you slipped it off, only to be met with another turtle with an orange bandana in your face. You jumped a little, bumping backwards nto Raph.

"Mikey, what did I tell ya before I left?!" He scolded the orange banded turtle.

The turtle named Mikey threw his hands up. "Sorry bro! I just wanted to get a good look." He offered his hand to you. "I'm Mikey!"

You smiled sheepishly, shaking his hand. "I'm y/n."

Another turtle with a purple bandana appeared. He did the same thing as Mikey and offered his hand to you. "It's nice to meet you y/n, i'm Donatello but just call me Donnie or Don." He smiled.

You smiled back and shook his hand. "Nice to meet you as well."

You awkwardly stood there while you heard Raph huff behind you, crossing his arms beside you. Then, you saw a rat, just a bit shorter than the turtles. You assumed this is the Sensei Raph had talked about.

You bowed your head slightly to him. "And you must be Sensei Splinter." You smiled a little up at him. He smiled back and stood in front of you, taking your hand in his and held it for a moment.

"And you must be y/n. Thank you for helping my idiot son." He shot a quick glare towards Raph.

"Of course. I wouldn't call him an idiot though, after all he was just trying to protect--"

Raph suddenly cleared his voice loudly. "Okay, you met her, now what?"

"Dude we should all watch a movie together!!" Mikey exclaimed.

Before Raph could protest, everyone else agreed. But you were hesitant. "I would love to but I don't want to become a problem for you guys."

Raph stared down at you. "The hell do you-" he couldn't finish before getting smacked in the head by Splinter. He winced before re-phrasing. "What do you think you'll be a problem for?" He said gruffly.

You shrugged a little. "I-i don't know, I just don't want to invade your guys' personal life."

Donnie spoke up. "Don't worry about that, we would love to have you. We haven't had company like this in… well, we've never met new people really. Except for April and Casey, but we've known them forever"

You nodded, remembering Raph telling you about them. Then you smiled. "Ok, then. I'll stay."

Mikey cheered and ran towards the kitchen to gather snacks. 

After a bit of setting up the movie (that apparently Donnie pirated) and setting up all the snacks, you settled down onto the couch beside Raph. You smiled up at him softly, making his heart clench. But he didn't show it, just smirking a little and huffing, taking a handful of popcorn from the bowl in your lap.

You chuckled, offering everyone popcorn before the movie began. Then Donnie turned on the movie, and you let out a deep exhale, sinking into the old, tattered couch.

After about halfway through the movie, while everyone else was asleep, Splinter left to go meditate in his room. So it was only you and Raph awake now.

"Your family seems really nice," you whispered to him.

He scoffed quietly. "Yeah but my brother's can get hella annoying."

You giggle a little and lean in closer. "I'm sure you'll seem annoying after a while of knowing you too."

Raph playfully glared down at you. "Oh yeah? Ditto. Except you're already gettin on my nerves." He joked.

You held your chest where your heart is dramatically. "Ouch. My heart."

You both laugh quietly. You looked down, then shuffled closer to him so your thighs were touching, and wrapped your arms around yourself, getting a little chilly.

He tensed a little, trying to even his breathing. He noticed your eyes starting to droop. "You know you can fall asleep, right?" He said softly. What has gotten into him lately?

"Are you sure?" You looked up towards him. He nodded, then grabbed a blanket from behind the couch, throwing it on you. You giggled a little and got snuggled up in the blanket. You then gently rested your head on his shoulder before whispering, "Is this okay..?"

"Y-yeah…" He whispered back. You smiled and got comfy against him, before closing your eyes to go to sleep.

After a couple moments, he relaxed. He let out a soft exhale. The way you cuddled into his side made his heart skip a beat. Shut the hell up, Raph. She's just cold. And you can't be goin soft for anyone!! He scolded himself. But despite his protests in his head, he let himself fall asleep, managing to fall into a slumber way easier than he's ever had.

[suffarustuffaru]

what is your opinion on the fact that tappei intended us to hate reinhard for killing theresia

hello!! :o im not sure if tappei really Intended for us to hate reinhard for that per say—i think more so tappei intends to show the astrea drama in general in a very nuanced manner (unless he proves me wrong and does weird stuff to develop them later on wjfnd but ill stand by this atm because theres a lot of textual evidence i think!!)

the arc 5 astrea drama is the very first time we learn about Any of that, and the way we learn it is interesting. this is AFTER getting attached to reinhard and wilhelm, who prior to arc 5 were established to be good well meaning and respectable people. then heinkel comes in claiming they both did shitty stuff, and of course heinkel makes the worst impression of all time, is shitty himself, AND interrupted wilhelm and reinhards reunion, so we’re not inclined to side with heinkel here. but the more we learn about the astrea family conflict, the more we realize, alongside subaru, that 1. wilhelm is not as great as he seems to be (its like learning that a close family member or friend has done some terrible stuff!! the common reaction to it is to feel Disappointed or Sad or maybe a little angry!!) and subaru also learns that 2. the entire situation is not black and white. it takes a heavy emotional toll on wilhelm, heinkel, and reinhard.

it’s also interesting that we dont Always learn info about it directly from the family members themselves—theresias dead of course and doesnt say much when she briefly comes back (more on this later), reinhard becomes more subdued around his family (which has gotta be a trauma response in an attempt to minimize the conflict), heinkel and wilhelm are unreliable narrators driven by their emotions. we learn some of the bulk of the drama from JULIUS, an outsider, but someone with ties to reinhard personally and the knights. so we’re also getting unreliable info about someone like heinkel (whos got a reputation thats honestly shittier than even his behavior, which i pity him for), and someone like reinhard is extremely hard to read (we just know that hes. you know. Traumatized. and Sad.)

i DO think though that throughout all of this we’re supposed to sympathize with EVERY astrea family member. every single one. we’re meant to understand each of their actions, because they all contribute to the family dysfunction unwillingly or consciously.

we’re given the reasoning behind almost all of their actions in the conflict. wilhelm lashed out because of grief, and hes spent years regretting what he did and not knowing how to fix things. heinkel’s an alcoholic from stress, trauma, and self-hatred, and post-arc 5 we see more of his psyche (which is shown in a very honest sympathetic light as well, hinting at heinkel getting future development and most likely a redemption arc). heinkel then lashes out (which is a Sad pattern in this family given wilhelm also does that... and its implied that heinkel is also like this Because of wilhelm's influence) to deal with all of this too (and because he Genuinely thinks those things now. hes a sad bitter man). we also know from side stories that heinkel used to be a good man who truly loved reinhard, and we do know that heinkel still loves louanna and has spent YEARS searching for a cure. as for reinhard, he was a CHILD (five when it first started!!) throughout almost all of this conflict, and hes the youngest member of his family and still young even as he’s grown up now. and he certainly didnt Intend to kill his own grandma when he was five, and he definitely deals with the guilt of all that years later. he shuts down around his family in the present, for one. and two—reinhard was failed by his family members, who have been ADULTS for the entire conflict and are his father and grandfather respectively. if anything, reinhard has the least blame here. he was a child!! a child thats been conditioned into serving the kingdom at All Costs to himself!! heinkel and wilhelms grief is understandable but it should not cost them their literal child!! they were the ones with the responsibility to pull themselves together and they failed to do that!!

but then reinhard kills theresia.

the thing with reinhard killing theresia is that reinhard was very much not wrong for that. tappei takes the time to show corpse soldier theresia going after heinkel and wilhelm—both of which are too weak in this moment physically and emotionally to stop theresia, WHO IS THEIR MOTHER AND WIFE RESPECTIVELY. and iirc wilhelm was also injured by her. heinkel pisses himself in fear while begging for her to stop—or something along those lines. its Terrifying. and it shows theresia, as she was in that moment, is a threat!! what else was reinhard going to do?? if he doesnt apprehend theresia, shes going to kill the rest of their family T^T

yeah so. reinhard kills theresia. afterwards, heinkel and wilhelm give reinhard shit for it but again, they were going to DIE if reinhard hadnt stepped in. and its clear that reinhard is saddened by what he had to do, even as he says that the corpse soldier theresia ISNT THERESIA. and reinhard is technically kind of right!! that was a corpse soldier!! she was both theresia (her last words to wilhelm are proof of this) and Not Theresia (she already died years ago!! this was a reanimated corpse!!).

its wilhelm and heinkel that misinterpret reinhard’s demeanor as him Not Caring. because he does care, but reinhard has always had an uncanny personality—likely partly because of trauma (remember how i said he shuts down a bit around his family? common trauma response) and partly because of reinhard’s endless divine protections giving him a very. Unique. perspective on everything. so reinhard has difficulty with connecting with others because of all of that. hes Really hard to read, especially in a complicated situation like this where its basically a lose-lose for everyone involved. wilhelm and heinkel are blinded by their grief and fear and anger and because reinhard 1. killed theresia, 2. said that that Wasnt Theresia, and 3. said he didnt regret killing theresia and 4. said that he did the right thing (which is probably because, again, what else could he do, theresia was going to kill heinkel and wilhelm)... yeah so wilhelm and heinkel read reinhard as being cold and unfeeling and callous so they both completely give up on reinhard in this moment. the coffin is. metaphorically and literally closed here, reinhard killing theresia (again. for the second time. if youre heinkel and wilhelm) was the very last nail.

and ultimately like. again, tappei gives us All the narrative tools to understand each member of the astrea family in this conflict. tappei also even notes the detail (iirc. in like a qna somewhere. if someone can find it or whatever please feel free to add!!) of theresia, on her death bed in arc 5, had nothing to say to reinhard and heinkel. its kind of. weird. when she makes SURE that wilhelm knows that she loves him but she doesnt even bother with her son and grandson - and heinkel does note that she looked at them "hatefully" (which. heinkel is an unreliable narrator, but its interesting for tappei to include that detail because heinkel also goes "she looked at us like That, who else could that be but mother?"). so uh. astrea family dynamics are complicated, have likely always been complicated even before everything went wrong with them, and tappei also gives us theresias full backstory in her pov in arc 5. AND he shows that the corpse soldier was still. Theresia. in the end. its extremely complicated. tappei takes the time to show that with every detail.

so anyway. yeah i feel like we're meant to sympathize with everyone in the astrea family. theyre all people with their own flaws, theyve all contributed in some way to the conflict whether they like it or not, they all have various degrees of blame, if you really want to go into whos the Most Guilty for all the dysfunction. even poor louanna contributed indirectly via falling into a coma T^T

but i dont think tappei means for us to like hate any of them. just because tappei Always shows how complicated the situation is. tappei is Always sympathetic to all astrea members as much as tappei also often calls them out for their flaws (heinkel is the most obvious example, tappei also does it with theresia and wilhelm a bit, and reinhard is shown to be a bit stilted in social situations with a habit of stomping on other peoples boundaries sometimes without realizing or because he thinks its for the other persons good, etc). and as much as i love making jokes at wilhelms expense because he did fuck up quite a Lot with his family (same with heinkel... and im a little sus of theresia but she Did care about heinkel in the past, we know that from her named chapter)...

like. i can understand where someone like wilhelm is coming from. do i hate him for lashing out at his five year old grandson and helping turn his son against his grandson? oh yeah. yeah. but i can Understand why he did it and i feel bad for him, which i think was more so tappei's goal here. so the audience can hate any of these characters if you so feel like it, but tappei means for us to deeply deeply get where they're coming from and why they did what they did. so maybe its more so that we're not supposed to hate these characters, maybe we're just supposed to hate Their Actions and wish that things didnt turn out that way. because it couldve been better at any turn - wilhelm couldve just not lashed out and blamed reinhard when he was five, heinkel couldve also pulled himself together, louanna didnt have to go into a coma, theresia didnt have to die twice, etc etc. but thats the point of it all i think. it turned for the worse but all we can do is try to think about How it turned out this way. and i pity all of them, really.

plus, reinhard, wilhelm, heinkel are 1000% getting some kind of further development with this, i'd say. and rezero is Repeatedly about forgiveness and growth, so yeah. i absolutely dont think we're supposed to fully hate any of them. if anything, im rooting for their growth before its. you know. Too Late. but yeah thats just my extremely long opinion/feelings on all of this, people are totally free to disagree of course :o !! hope that answers your question though!!

[thatdeadaquarius]

With your language AU, I remember watching a video about a guy speaking angrily nonesense in an Indian accent and people thinking he was very angry. Imagine this as the Creator speaks angry gibberish to people and they just assume that the Creator is cursing them or something. (Or like when they speak gibberish to babies and everyone's like, "Aw the Creator is teaching that baby their divine language")

*AUDIENCE DRAMATICALLY GASPS.

✨️I look pretty good for a dead bitch✨️

She's alivveee!!!

Whats up i almost passed away from sheer academic workload, but im not in the ground yet 🥰 And with drafts outta my ass! :D

Hope yall ready for ur regularly scheduled Bullshit Genshin Sagau <3

SANDBEES THATS SUCH A GOOD USERNAME & ALSO SORRY I ANSWERED THIS SO FUCKING LATE JESUSSSSS 💀💀💀

SORRY ABT THE POLL I CANT BELIEVE I COULDNT FIGURE OUT HOW TO DELETE IT IM FUCKING CRYING I WOULD DO THIS-

Well at least i can do polls thru this in the future?? Idk tumblr is ass so we'll see how this accidental test works out...

☆

So these were the first thngs i thought of and its not super long bc ASKERS R GENIUSES OKAY

SOMTIMES I JUST WANNA PROFUSELY THANK U GUYS AS A REPLY FOR SHARING WITH THE CLASS THRU MY BLOG 💖💘💫

Saw the gif and couldnt help but think this is how ppl like Alhaitham or Diluc would react to u "speaking ur langauge"

"Our langauage" aka being a SIM 💀

◇

Stop Albedo would ask you to teach him ur lang/grammar rules 😭

What u gonna do when Zhongli asks you to teach him some words-

OH NO

NO DONT PASS ON YOUR BULLSHIT LMAO

U GIVING ZHONGLI SOME STUPID SIM WORD LIKE

Your ass: "GIGGLABAH means beautiful :) "✨️

Zhongli: "Oh thank you, how different from our own version, so excited sounding..."

You walk by him strolling the harbor and he just smiles at you and says

"You look gigglabah today my liege."

HIS REGAL FACE AND FANCY WALK WITH HIS HAND BEHIND HIS BACK AND EVERYTHING

(honestly ppl paint him as oblivious but he kinda seemed like the type of bastard who seems like he's not aware but sometimes he secretly knows the truth, he's just getting too much amusement out of it to stop doing it, LOL he does shit like the above to see YOUR reaction- LMAO)

◇

You're a maniac pls tell me u dont pass on simlish to all the serious characters-

XIAO WOULD SECRETLY THINK IT SOUNDS GOOFY BUT WANT TO BE INVOLVED BC ITS YOU ANYWAY LMAO

SO HE'S JUST SLIGHTLY SQUIRMING AND GETTIN PINK EVERYTIME HE SAYS A STUPID SIM WORD BC HE FEELS LIKE A GOOF HAHA

(& he's not the only one, others too like Kaveh, YELAN, Ningguang, Nahida, DILUC, AYAKA LMAO-)

◇

Some ppl i could see taking ur gibberish bullshittery and whether they believe its real or not is irrelevant bc theyre using it anyway-

And i dont mean in a good way 😭

LIKE IM THINKING OF VENTI.

CRAZY BARD INCLUDING SIMLISH ASS GIBBERISH WORDS IN HIS SONGS BC OF YOU

"Be cheerful like the hugkukie,

and may your cup never leaky!"

And Diluc loves you.

Really he does, deeper than he thinks-

But his eye is twitching LMAOO

◇

(Ok but if you did like multiple of these language shenanigans thruout the asks ive gotten, Kaeya would literally grow so fond of you and associate you with goofy funny shit that makes him laugh so hard that everytime he sees you he automatically is beaming with a smile, or trying to supress a warm grin- this got away from me but its 1:44am for me rn so i would love a smiley Kaeya rn -)

♡

Speaking language bs I have my 2nd oral exam for spanish tomorrow, pls send whatever good vibes u got and i am also really open to prayers from any religion as well. sobs

Hope anyone got any enjoyment out of my response bc tbh the ask is what rlly matters to me atp lmao

Until the next shenanigan-

Safe travels,

💀♒️

♡the beloveds mwah ♡

@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist