#( thats what we call growth )

[tinyarmedtrex]

An Exquisite Temptation

Read the last chapter here!

Or start from the beginning here

Preview:

One day, he thought about Adam and Eve and what he would have said to Eve, if he could have spoken to her. Would he have warned her? Told her about all the suffering she was about to inflict on herself and the man she loved?

No, he decided. He would have told her to eat from the forbidden fruit. Because even with how much the fallout hurt those few moments, that first spark of knowing that life could be so much more, it made the rest worthwhile.

Huge thank you to @kennacrab23 for beta'ing and making the moodboard. You're simply the best <3

[evergreen-femme]

ok yea i stopped watching konosuba a few episodes into the first season bc darkness made me viscerally uncomfortable

[elysefz]

their recusers were no more gentle and their captors. elyse tried to argue, she wanted to know where max and samuel were before she got on the boat but she was swept up in the rush of the rescue. “nikolai,” she grabbed his hand, like she was grabbing a rope to pull out of a raging sea. she stumbled briefly. “i need to find max. i need...” why she trusted him to help, she couldn’t articulate. @kcliningrcd​

[sojourner-between-worlds]

TSS Lucy: I can't stand George. I would like to hit him in the head with a shovel.

TEG Lucy: I will now commit Murder because they beat up my bestie, George

[if-mirrormine]

Asking around my fave IFs for this question 😭🙏🤭

"What is one thing ROs want to hear, need to hear, and dread to hear from the MC?"

want // need // dread

grayson: i have always loved you // you did everything you could // i could never love you

kennedy: i need you in my life // you deserve everything good thats happened to you // i wish we never met

alex: you're the only one for me // none of it was your fault // i regret our relationship

[giantsreach]

carver dealing with his bi feelings before joining the wardens and after, colorized

[goopaspect]

so funny to lose followers tbh. just generally

[theactivepresent]

In my *checks notes* 6th year of academia I am finally finishing and uploading essays 24, sometimes 48 whole entire hours before the deadline

[boschlowtxt]

Feel free to ask about my AUs I love talking about them <3

[astralmarionette]

writing an akutagawa-kyouka (not ship) vent fic except its a hurt/comfort vent fic bc its what wouldve made ME feel better if anyone has issues with it GET OVER IT idc this isnt abt you <3

[sunoflegend]

someone actually started a cybertronian rehabilitation center. bold move, honestly - but.. it's a noble effort. hopefully it actually works out before someone frags it all up.

[bobacupcake]

Can you do one about the Sea of Thieves water?

OK

so . there was a biiig long talk about this at siggraph one year!! you can watch that here if you'd like . in the time between me getting this ask and me fully recreating the water, acerola also released a great video about it . the biiig underlying thing they do and the reason why it looks so good is they are making a Really Detailed Ocean Mesh in realtime using something called an FFT (fast fourier transform) to simulate hundreds of thousands of waves, based on a paper by TESSENDORF

WHAT IS AN FFT - we'll get to that. first we have to talk about the DFT - the discreet fourier transform. let's say you have a SOUND. it is a c chord - a C, an E, and a G, being played at the same time. all sounds are waves!!! so when you play multiple sounds at the same time, those waves combine!!! like here: the top is all 3 notes playing together, so they form the waveform at the bottom!!

now if someone handed you the bottom wave, could you figure out each individual note that was being played? how about if someone handed you a wave of One Hundred Notes. you would think it would be very hard. and well, it would be, if not for the Discreet Fourier Transform.

essentially, there is a way to take a bunch of points on a waveform comprised of a bunch of different waves, add them all together, do some messed up stuff with imaginary numbers, that will spit back out at you what individual waves are present. i made a little test program at the start of all this: the left are the waves i am putting into my Big Waveform, the top right is what that ends up looking like, and all the little rainbow points on it are being sampled to spit out the graph at the bottom right: it shows which frequency bands the DFT is finding (here it is animated)

this has enormous use cases in anything that deals with audio and image processing, and also,

THE OCEAN

tessendorf is basically like, hey, People Who Are Good At The Ocean say that a buuuunch of sine waves do a pretty good job of approximating what it looks like. and by a bunch they mean like, hundreds of thousands to millions. oh no.... if only there was a way we could easily deal with millions of sine waves..........

well GREAT news. not only can you do the DFT in one direction, but you can also do it in REVERSE. if you were to be given the frequency graph of a noise for example, you could use an INVERSE DFT to calculate what the combined wave graph looks like at any given time. so if you were to have say, the frequency graph of an oceaaaan, for example, you could calculate what the Ocean wave looks like at any given time. and lucky for us, it works in two dimensions. and thats the foundation of the simulation !!!!!

BUT WAIT

as incredible as the DFT is, it doesn't scale very well. the more times you have to do it, the slower it gets, exponentially, and we are working with potentially millions of sine waves here

THE FAST FOURIER TRANSFORM here we are . the fast fourier transform is a way of doing the discreet fourier transform, except, well, fast. i am Not going to explain the intricacies of it because its very complex, but if you want to learn more there are a ton of good 30 minute long videos on youtube about it . but essentially, due to the nature of sine waves repeating, you can borrow values as you go, and make the calculation Much faster (from exponential growth to logarithmic growth which is much much slower, and scales very well at higher numbers). it's, complicated, but the important part is it's so much faster and the diagram kind of looks like the shadow the hedgehog story plot

so if we use the inverse FFT on a graph of a rough estimate of what frequency of waves in the ocean (called a spectrum, basically tells us things like how many small waves, how many big waves, how different waves follow the wind direction. sea of thieves uses one called the phillips spectrum but there are better ones out there!!) now we have our waves !!!!!!! we can also use another inverse FFT to get the normals of the waves, and horizontal displacement of the waves (sharpening peaks and broadening valleys) through some derivatives . yayy calculus

OK MATH IS OVER. WE HAVE OUR WAVES!!! they are solid pink and look like pepto bismol. WHAT NOW

i cheated a bit here they look better than not being shaded because i am using the normals to reflect a CUBEMAP to make it look shiny. i think sea of thieves does this too but they didnt mention it in their talk. they did mention a FEW THINGS THEY DID THOUGH

FIRST OFF - SUBSURFACE SCATTERING. this is where the sun pokes through since water is translucent. SSS IS REALLY EXPENSIVE !!!!!! so they just faked it. do you remember the wave sharpening displacement i mentioned earlier? they just take the value where the waves are being sharpened and this will pretty naturally show off the areas that should have subsurface scattering (the sides of waves). they make it shine through any time you are looking towards the sun. they also add a bit of specular ! sss here is that nice blue color, and specular is the shiny bits coming off the sun. the rest of the lighting is the cubemap i mentioned earlier, i dont know if thats what they use but it looks nice !!!!!

then the other big thing that they do is the FOAM !! sorry i lied. there's more math. last one. you remember the wave sharpening displacement i Just mentioned. well they used that to find something called the JACOBIAN and well im not even going to begin to try and explain what it means but functionally what it does, is when the jacobian is NEGATIVE it means waves are clipping into eachother. and that means we should draw some foam!!! we can also blur and fade out the foam texture over time and continuously write to it to give it some movement, and bias this value a bit to make more or less foam. they do both of these!!!

YAYYYYY !! OK !! THAT'S SEA OF THIEVES WATER!!!!! THANKS FOR WAITING ALL THIS TIME. you can see my journey here if you would like to i have tagged it all oceanquest2023

thank you everyone for joining me :) i had fun

[gettinontopic]

This is so transphobic like what the hell is this

↓Screenshot↓

↑Screenshot↑

[Image Id: A large addition to a tumblr poat reading "Also if I'm going to be honest, passing as a man is also just easier than passing as a woman. The rules to being a man and passing as a man are much more lenient than being a woman or passing as a woman. Trans women have to worry about shit like "I need to wear an outfit that distracts people from the fact I have an adams apple, and not allow people to see that I have shoulders, and learn makeup and basically become a voice actor and etc. and maybe I won't be called a man today" (and if you pass too well and the wrong cis guy feels guilty about being attracted to you, you get murdered meanwhile if you're a trans guy and you wanna pass as a man, you gotta like have short hair and hide or remove your boobs and at this point you can already just go to the grocery store and most people will see you as a man. Once you get facial hair and a deeper voice, most people will just see you as some guy. Like I don't understand why transmascs insist on this idea that they could never really pass. Like the idea that trans man who passes is almost far-fetched. Weird as hell." End Id]

Lets upack this shall we?

1."Passing as a man is easier than passing as a woman"

No it's not. The rules to being a man and passing as a men as strict as lots of rules for women. Have you ever seen a cis guys who fails to pass? They're called names, theyre physically beat, and theyre often ostracized from their cis peers just as fast as any trans person. Cis boys cant even pass half the time by the rules they made. Quit fucking lying about men just magically having it so easy.

Your experiences as passing as a man aren't universal and if you've never passed as one what makes you think it's fucking easy?

Also god forbid you're a black man, or a black man who is into something deemed feminine. Shit I've seen guys call black men women for wearing a damn hair bonnet.

Oh not to mention I'm only a man to transphobes when they can call me a "dangerous black man" only to switch back to tryibg to detransition me by saying "you can just be a masc girl!"

2.Adams apple

While you have to hide yours, I have to wear shit that distracts people that I *don't* have one. Cause, and I know this is wild, if they expect you not to have one for being a women, what do they expect me to have for being a man? Hmm? And if you're a man who's adams apple never came in? I've seen them called girls to. Shit I've heard a guy called not manly for missing his, and he was still in puberty!!

3.Shoulders

While you have to hide you shoulders, I have to do whatever I can to have the.. small shoulders on men? maybe if youre in a "non manly" field like music or art, but I do gym work. I better look likeit regardless of the disability that effacts my muscles growth and development or I am called maam by every guy there. Which sucks btw.

4. Makeup and voice acting:

Trans men also are regularly advised to wear makeup that masculinizes them and do voice training. thats some of our oldest passing tips. thats litterally never been unique to trans women. what the FUCK kinda of implications are you trying to put out here?

5. Murder:

Hey did you know cis guys will murder trans men bc they were attracted to them and then found out they werent "real men" and then kill them. shit cis women also kill us if they find out they were attracted to us and we aren't their ideal man anymore. do u know how men who hear im butch and into women behave?

Fuck right the fuck off trying to tokenize the murder lf trans women while throwing trans men murders in the "that doesn't happen" bin.

6. How many times have we said short hair and no boobs dont fucking automatically gets us gendered correcly!! We have voices that have to be trained, we have muscles were expected to build,and some men even watch the way you walk to guess if you have a dick or not.

Listen to any trans men. any of us for five minutes. those things do not making an easily passing trans man fuck you for lying about our experiences as not a trans man.

7. "You gotta like have short hair or remove your boobs"

Untrue! just Untrue. we also have to preform the rules of manhood really well. ive seen beareded transmen clocked for like so many different other reasons and you wouldn't listen to those men if it would save all trans people lives forever. cis men constantly dig at other men presentation to keep each other in line. Its a regular for them.

Also: not all of want to pass with those features. I deserve to have long hair and not bind and still pass as a man and you suck for defining everything around passing.

8. I don't know why you insist on this idea that trans women never really pass without obscene work (when ive met trans women that admit they have it easy by throwing on a dress and wearing her hair down) and that all trans men who have ascess to transition magically do pass (When multiple of us transitioning have said we dont)

If we can't talk about the ones who don't pass then you kinda can just sweep away the idea we don't face discrimination or danger and that's getting us killed actually.

None of us have said we can all never really pass any who say they can't are usually speaking on their own experiences. Because you want us all to pass so bad you don't care that we don't, and that it gets us backlash and hurt.

Also, if you ever read this, kiss my black ass and go reevaluate what makes you think you should speak on experiences that aint yours as if you're the one with the Hard Cold Facts.

[honeytonedhottie]

the science behind manifesting (why it works)⋆.ೃ࿔*:･🌷

this post is going to explain in depth the science behind manifesting and WHY it works, this is a lengthy, wordy post so i hope u can maybe learn something from it.

in theory, our thoughts are frequencies, and trying to manifest something is aligning ur frequencies to ur desire. (align ur thoughts with desire)

why can we consider our thoughts as waves?

lets take something else that we can consider as waves, light for example can be measured in waves and those waves are on an electromagnetic spectrum. humans are only able to absorb the visible spectrum, however there are many more spectrums that human beings can't absorb. everything on the electromagnetic spectrum is energy including light.

in that same breath we can consider our thoughts as waves bcuz scientists have found something called EEGS in the brain (EEGs track and record brain-wave patterns). electromagnetic signals were recorded in the brain when thoughts occurred. from this information u can understand that thoughts are similar to light and can be measured on the electromagnetic spectrum in WAVES.

einstien's relativity (physics)

the basic understanding was that life consists of molecules (like our bodies, what we eat, even the computer which im typing this post on), molecules -> atoms (atoms make up everything physical) and atoms -> electrons, protons, and neutrons. we can measure particles in science and what makes a particle a particle is that it has mass. what is mass? mass is a position in time and space, and mass can ALWAYS be converted to energy and vice-versa. E=MC2

the interchangeability of these two quantities has a proportionality with the speed of light (electromagnetic spectrum) with this we can understand that there is a correlation between particles and waves.

the law of assumption

the law of assumption states that what u assume to be true is true. and manifesting is neuroplasticity. ur using repetition to rewire ur thoughts, create different neuropathways, to experience a new reality.

neuroplasticity is the ability of neuronetworks in the brain to change thru growth reorganization. it is when the brain is rewired to function in someway that differs from how it previously functioned.

neuroplasticity is the reason why we r able to grow, and change and learn new things.

repetition creates long term memory by eliciting or reenacting strong chemical interactions at the synapsis of ur neuron.

neurogenesis is the continuous development of new neurons in the brain. (it only stops when ur dead)

think of it like a plant, if u stop watering the plant it'll die. its similar with our thoughts, if we stop thinking the same thoughts and start thinking different ones, our old self and thoughts would die and a new one would be created.

the definition of an assumption is a thing that is accepted as true or certain to happen without proof. the brain works thru repetition so thats why repeating thoughts can create new energy, and a new reality.

[junipers-archive]

All In

Word Count: 540

Includes: fluff, fluff and what do you know more fluff! Reader x Spencer where reader has a kid and he lets her know that is more than okay (kids name is Mia- 5 years old) (Prompt from this challenged by @imagining-in-the-margins )

You were on your way out of the office when Spencer caught up to you, matching your pace. You'd only been on a few dates and didn't want to push him seeing as the last one had been interrupted by a call from the school telling you, you needed to pick up your daughter.

She had gotten the stomach flu and was being sent home which was fine of course, except Spencer had answered your phone while you were using the restroom...and you hadn't quite told him about her yet.

It wasn't that you didn't love her with all your heart, but having a kid and dating was hard enough. Hell, finding a date with a kid was hard. So you wait till you know its not a deal breaker, and if it is then you leave them, you love Mia more than anything.

To say the least, that wasn't the way you wanted him to find out.

"Hey Y/n" he tried to catch your eye as you stopped by your car.

You avoided it when at all possible while you searched for your keys, "hey Spence"

"I uh- I know our last date was interrupted-which was totally fine by the way but-"

"Look I understand if this isn't for you. Say the word and.." god it hurt to even say it, "We can just be friends, no hard feelings."

Very hard feelings, very very hard for you to let go of him.

To your slight comfort he looked taken aback by this, "No-no I was just wondering if you'd like to go on another date?"

Oh, he wasn't leaving?

You found your keys. "Y-yeah that would be wonderful, when and Where were you thinking?"

"Maybe this weekend? There's a carnival, Saturday would be preferable, but my schedules pretty flexible."

Dammit. "What time?" You had placed your belongings in the car's passenger seat and now were standing in front of him.

"I was thinking around 12 in the afternoon or around there if thats okay with you?"

"I-I'm sorry I can't make it, Mia's got a doctors appointment in the afternoon..."

He looked disappointed, and dammit you knew it was too good to be true. "Oh. Well its open Sunday too, now worries, I-I thought she could come with us as well?"

Dear god he was perfect. "I-well I'd have to check with her but yea she's wanted to go for as long a her 5 year old brain can remember."

He grinned at your remark, the small crinkles of his eyes showing,

"Yea I read somewhere that carnivals can be very good to brain-train young children around her age and that the many of the more odd games can be quite beneficial for their growth, but if she's delicate to loud noises it would help if-"

You interrupted him then, grabbing him by his cute little tie with the numbers of pi and pulling him into a kiss.

When you parted you whispered against his lips, "You did your research doctor?"

You stared up at him through your lashes as he responded, never once did he break eye contact.

"Of course, she's apart of your life, and I want to be apart of it too Y/n, I'm in, I'm all in."

[kajaono]

BBC Sherlock taking John and Sherlock’s relationship for granted creates a rift in the narrative

I have already pointed out in previous post how disappointed I was that John and Sherlock relationship never developed, in a way it should and would have been justified by the narrative

In this point I want to look at how their relationship started and how this was already created the first problems. This review contains multiple spoilers for other Sherlock Holmes shows.

When John and Sherock meet for the fisrt time in ASIP they immediatley start working together.

No hesitation. They both went full in, from minute one onwards. This is a nice way of showing how well John and Sherlock work together, and that they think alike. But on the other hand it feels like Mofftiss took the relationship for granted and said: "These are John and Sherlock. Of course they work perfectly which each other. We do not have to talk about that."

But imo that was TOO fast. There is no conflict. They never have time to discuss where they stand in this relationship. And because Mofftiss pretend, that they work perfectly together, from minute one onwards - even though they just met - it is hard to further develop their relationship from here on. Because it is already perfect. You would need something really big to happen for them to redefine their roles in this relationship. We kind of had that in season 4, but we knew how messy that went. And there was never a TALK after that. Thats also a main problem in this show. John and Sherlock never really talk. It is John who often sits down and talks and Sherlock is not listening. Of course the relationship is developing, but the show never uses its whole potential.

So what would have been a better way of handling their first meeting? A first meeting that allows them to naturelly grow into the relationship... and further develop their relationship?

Elementary

Yeah I am gonna drag Elementary into this again. BBC Sherlock and Elementray share a really similar set up. They meet each other for the first time, and immeditaly move in and start solving cases together. But Elemenetary gives John and Sherlock time to grow into the relastionship.

This moment defines the Joanlock relationship imo. It shows that Joan is ready to confront Sherlock and call out his bullshit, that Sherlock listens and is effected by what Joan thinks and says, that Sherlock still has a lot of work to do. AND - most importantly - that a Johnlock relationship takes effort and is nothing that you can take for granted.

And this show was on air for 7 seasons, with 22 episodes each. Nevertheless the relationship was developing the whole time. In future seasons they are recalling their first meeting, honoring how much they have grown.

Resulting in:

gif by: @marlahey

This is something we never got in BBC Sherlock. We never saw them honoring the growth they made, recalling their first meeting, and having a satisifying conculsion, aka: "I love you" (in what way doesn't matter btw. The Joanlock moment wasn't romantic either).

Of course you could agrue now: "But Elementary did had the time for stuff like that, BBC Sherlock only had 4 seasons, with 3 episodes each."

So let us look at The Irregulars next:

This show starts as a usual crime detective show... with a supernatural twist. But slowly you learn that the core point of the show is the relationship between Sherlock Holmes and John Watson.

The show is set years after Holmes and Watsons first meeting. Actually when we first meet John his relationship with Sherlock is over already, broken and ruined. Later we - the viewer - get multiple flashback scene, showing us how they first met, how their relationship developed, and why they are not talking with each other anymore, resulting in this glorious moment:

But the show doesn't stop there, it even goes further and shows us how John and Sherlock slowly get closer to each other again. Sitting in the dark, discussing their relationship, the mistakes they made and most important: apologizing.

Still angry at Netflix for cancelling the show.

Of Course we also have other approaches. RDJ Sherlock.

Like BBC Sherlock it leans much more into Crime aspect of the story. But the story still centers around Holmes and Watsons relationship. When we first meet them they have been together long, probably for years. They are already settled in their relationship. They both know their roles in this relationship and they both feel comfortable with it. They behave like an old married couple. And when they fight, it is never serious. The first real problems erupt when Watson decides to marry. And thats the whole core problem of the first movie: Watson moving out of 221B to marry a woman and how Holmes deals with that. He develops from more or less boycotting the marriage to accepting it and gifting Mary and Watson a ring.

The second movie is him trying to accept that his love of his life best friend is married now and trying to solve cases on his own, without Watson. Eventually sacrificing his own life to safe Watson AND Mary. So even though the movies are crime movies, the Johnlock relationship is still the heart of the story.

If the movies wouldn't focus on the Johnlock relationship, the story would be a different one.

Many Johnlock moments in the movies are non-verbal, so excuse the extensive use of gifs here. But there is so much happening on a non-verbal level!

For example the wedding, which is a huge Johnlock moment. John being super nervous before his wedding and you see that Holmes is not happy either, but he still nods, letting Watson know that it is okay and that Watson is making the right decision.

But nevertheless he has to look away when Mary and Watson kiss. The message is clear here. He isn't happy, he is sad because he is loosing the most important person in his life.

Then we have moments like this, (see below) where - during a moment of danger - they cling to each other, making sure the other one is safe. Not being afraid of physical contact. This is something I was also missing in BBC sherlock btw. Physical they always made sure to stay away from each other. When they hugged it was like... a big thing. Which - set in modern times - felt a little bit off. Because in contrast to Miss Sherlock (see below) Holmes was never shown to be actively against physical contact. I wish the production team would have allowed more friendly touches. I mean... ACD Johnlock walks around arm-in-arm and John gets nervous everytime Holmes comes close, because "poeple might talk." Nah...

I think A game of shadows, peaked when Watson and Holmes danced. Because it shows that they have a deep connection. They came from a place where they acted like an old married couple, then being all nervous because of the Watson/Marry wedding, having to re-identify their relationship towards each other, to this finale dance, where - symbolically- they are a couple again. Everything came full circle. It is like: No matter what happens around Watson and Holmes, they will always find their way back to each other. They will always be the center of the story. It will always be them against the rest of the world, no matter what. No excuses.

But acually, the adaptation most close to BBC Sherlock is Miss Sherlock. I mean... it was basically a female japanese copy of BBC Sherlock.

But still... it improved a lot of things. When Sherlock and Wato (Watson) first meet they really can not stand each other. This Sherlock is also rude, but it is really clear that she is on the autism spectrum. She gets overhelmed by too much light and by loud noises. She is really against phyisal contact.

And the most beautiful thing about this adaptation: It knows that in the end Watson will always be Sherlocks weakness. It will not say: "Don't try to drown in the well. Good luck. I am off hugging my sister." (season 4 shade). In Miss Sherlock the finale conflict is: Watson being manipulated to work against Sherlock. Showing, that in the end, it all boils down to their relationship again. And this adaptation wrote a scene that is just.. chef kiss!

When Wato is around, Sherlock is all grumpy towards her. But during the finale Wato is kidnapped. And the show gives us a short look into one of Sherlocks most private moments. The moment she realizes that Wato is kidnapped. A moment where Sherlock is completly alone. And we see a honest and extremly vunerable moment. This one:

Sherlock screaming Watos name in agony. Knowing that she NEEDS Wato. And then she goes and risks everything to save Wato. EVERYTHING!

Her reputation and her life. She is even ready to be killed by Wato.

TL.DR:

So what am I trying to say? That BBC Johnlock has no relationship development? That there isn't any trust between them? Nope, course not.

We see John and Sherlock growing into the relationship, we see Sherlock getting softer because of John, we see John healing because of Sherlock and on the other hand we see Sherlock opening up, telling Watson whats really on his mind. Trying to be a better human, being more social. But imo that should have been the plot of idk... the first season, maybe the second one. Because thats just the beginning. A Johnlock relationship is so mch deeper, holds so much more story potential. Yeah, John and Sherlock belong to ecah other and are good for each other. We know that! Is Sherlock ready to confess his (plantonic) love for Watson by the end of the show? Is Watson so jealous of Sherlocks love interest that he opens a rift in the universe? Is Sherlock having a break down, screaming out Watsons name in agony? I don't want to see John being replaced by a balloon in season 4 (!) and it is played for a joke. Their relationship should be so so so much deeper at that point. For me BBC Sherlock felt like, they stop mid-relationship-development. It feels like Mofftiss said: "John and Sherlock work well with each other and are best friend. What else is there to say?" SO! MUCH! MORE!

They had all this potential, and went nowhere with it. And i don't necessarily mean romantically btw. Eveen Hilson drove into the sunset together eventually...