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#(I've still had presents most of the recent years but it's all just like the 'hey buy me this' 'here you go love you' type presents)
kirby-the-gorb · 8 months
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(No Obligation Whatsoever but if you *want* to give me a birthday present my kofi is in the pinned post or you could always draw a kirby :> after all I started drawing him every day in the first place just cuz I think low key simple kirby drawings are fun and there should be more of them!)
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words-be-upon-ye · 2 months
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There are a couple tropes I really love in the space of Miraculous Ladybug fan works, but quite possibly my favorite is when the miraculous holders just get creature from using their powers.
Like yeah, I would say that hosting the power of an abstract concept given sentience, that got shoved into the shape of an animal and bound to a piece of jewelry, would kinda mess with your body a bit.
The little bit of this we get in canon is basically that Adrien loves being a cat and the whole Tikki munches incident.
But I love it when people give them ears and wings and tails, give them eyes that aren't quite human anymore. Fuck with their gender and their sense of body. Sometimes it's body horror, sometimes it's just aesthetic. Love it either way.
I just think it's so fun, a lot of the time it's combined with the like "when a holder and the kawami really respect and bond with each other there's nothing that can be done except having magic bleed into the holder" I think that's fun, but also just making the animal of the kwami a bigger deal is fun. Like if you're going to make it a ladybug you might as well give her wings and antenna and mirrored eyes.
#yes I do like ml#there's just so many characters I like to mess with in my head#also sue me I'm trans and have a certain respect for body horror. for the forced change of your physical self especially when you chose it#anyway I alwasys ramble in the tags#I set up this side blog to hide random writing thoughts I had and oh boy do I have a lot and none of them are on here#and recenetly (and by recently I mean like the past year) I've been hit with so many ml thoughts)#they're all gay#and some of them are cohesive#actually a lot of them revolve around chloe and au's where she gets a meaningful improvement arc#give that gay girl intresting stuff#miraculous ladybug#ml#although one of my ideas is also my very fun very gender take of ml where to conceal their identities ladybug and chat start pretending#to be different people under the masks like they don't need to like explicitly say. they just#switch costumes a lot and they like slyly hint at maybe theres dozens of people who pass around the miraculous to make sure that their#Identities are always safe#and to support the act they also start changing the genders they present as as holders. everyone is like “it's clearly multiple people”#and during this process marinette and Adrien are both like slowly having personal gender revelations#and gabe is like tearing his hair out over having to fight this secret group of superheros that he can never find or catch#but he's still just getting his ass kicked by two kids who're doing the world's most successful costumes change bits#it's like those “fake dating” tropes where they're like “oh but we really do love each other” but with gender#“oh I've got a great idea lets pretend to be different genders sometimes”#cut to “hmh ok so I think I'm not pretending anymore”#oh I do always ramble in the tags
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no-one-hears-me · 8 months
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I don't understand how people get excited to start college
#even as a freshman I didn't wanna go#i knew it was gonna be rough#and I enjoyed hs ngl. I just knew college was gonna be bad#and it was! hate that place#it literally ruined my personality and I actually am upset about that#I used to be soooo funny and cool. but being absolutely exhausted and miserable constantly drained the life outta me#then I also got very deep into ed behavior which also drains all the energy and personality away#it's weird to talk about ed things bc like. I think of that as a relapse but I never recovered#I have had this for years now and have never stopped. it's still very present#it just doesn't consume me as much at certain times ig. so when it becomes a very big focus I think of it as a relapse#when in reality. my behavior hasnt really changed. I just spend way more time thinking about things#honestly my current situation is worse than it was before. now I'm running more than before while eating less most days#I'm gonna be honest. idk how my body does this#the amount of energy I expend vs the amount I consume. very disproportionate#I also have been sleeping less recently and I normally don't sleep much sooooo that's not great#where is my energy and ability to function coming from? I don't have much to burn up realistically#ALSO idk what I did but I've started feeling genuine hunger for the first time in years#usually what I consider hunger is actually just some sort of sickness/weakness/nausea and pain that lets me know to eat#but a few days ago I actually got hungry. which I did not enjoy but it went away after a little while#idk why that happened#Sera
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harrysfolklore · 2 months
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Harry Styles Answers the Web's Most Searched Questions | WIRED
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this was posted on my patreon a few months ago, enjoy ! MASTERLIST | MY PATREON
"Hi I'm Harry Styles and this is the Wired Autocomplete Interview."
Harry introduced himself to the camera and you smiled, you were currently at WIRED Studios for Harry's long awaited autocomplete interview that he finally agreed to do thanks to yours and his fans persistence.
You were sitting behind the camera with the rest of the crew, watching him with a small smile.
A crew member passed the first board to him, he looked at it confusedly for a minute before speaking.
"Okay so. I'm answering what I think or what?"
Everyone in the studio laughed and the director quickly explained to him how the game worked once again, you rolled your eyes with affection and he sent a wink your way.
"Alright, how is Harry Styles?" he said after taking the little piece of paper off the board, "I'm good, I'm really enjoying being home in London, I was away for a while on tour and I'm going to stay here for a bit so that's exciting."
"How did Harry Styles," he paused to rip the next paper and reveal the rest of the question, "Become famous? Well, when I was sixteen years old I auditioned for a singing show called The X Factor, I got put in a band with four lads and we didn't win but we put out a song called What Makes You Beautiful," he smiled for a second, "that one put us on the map, we released a bunch of albums and now I'm here."
"How did Harry Styles meet his wife?" at this, he turned his gaze to you to give you a big smile, you immediately mirrored his and nodded your head, signaling that you were okay with him talking about it.
"We could say that it was basically a blind date, we had a friend in common who thought we would be a good match and set us up, we had an amazing first date but then I had to travel to Los Angeles for work so we couldn't really see each other after that but once I was back in London we hung out all the time, and now we're married."
He smiled at you again and you couldn't help but feel your heart melt, you had been married for 6 months now but the married life was still new for the both of you, and everything he called you his wife butterflies made its way to your stomach.
"How is Harry Styles still alive?" his eyes widened in surprise and he looked around the room, making a few present laugh, "Um, that's a weird thing to search on the internet, but I guess, I don't know if I can answer that, I don't think anyone can answer that we're just lucky to still be around and enjoy life."
He gave the camera one of his infamous "frog smiles" and handed the board to a crew member who was ready with the next one.
"Does Harry Styles have tattoos?" he revealed the first question of the new board, "Yes, he does. I have a lot of tattoos actually, they're basically all over my body. The most recent one is right here," he pointed at the back of his right arm, "It's my wedding date, actually, everyone might call me a sap but I was reserving this arm for tattoos about my wife a and future kids, so I guess it's finally time to fill it."
It was safe to say that  fans watching at home and everyone in the studio absolutely melted, especially you.
"Does Harry Styles have siblings? I do I have a sister, she's older than me and her name is Gemma. A lot of people claim she's cooler than me for some reason but I don't thing that's true," he shrugged and revealed the next question, "Does Harry Styles speak Italian? I would like to think that I do, I spend a lot of time there and I've learned how to communicate pretty decently."
"Is Harry Styles an actor?" he said after peeling the first sticker of the new board, "He tries to be an actor that's for sure," he laughed and everyone in the room did as well, "I mean, I've been in a couple of movies, I've auditioned for a bunch of roles and my agent has sent me scripts to go through," he shrugged "So I can say that makes me an actor."
"Is Harry Styles american?" he shook his head at that one, "He is not! He's Britain, born and raised okay? He's very proud of it."
"What's Harry Styles BeReal? I don't have a BeReal, but if I did I wouldn't tell you," he pointed to the camera jokingly, "What are Harry Styles fans called? I think they are referred to as Harries, but I don't like to speak on behalf of them, you should ask them."
"What was Harry Styles first song? My first song was Sign Of The Times, I wrote it with friends that I love, and that is my wife's favorite song I've ever written, right love?"
"That's correct." you said from your spot, pretty audible so you know it would make it to the final cut of the interview.
"What are Harry Styles songs about?" he peeled the last sticker of the board, "They're about a lot of things, life, friends, love, my wife," he shrugged, "I even have one about the female orgasm."
You quietly giggled, knowing that his fans would go crazy over that last sentence.
"Did Harry Styles go to college? He did not, he became a singer."
"Did Harry Styles win a Grammy? He somehow won Album Of The Year last year, which is absolutely insane if you ask him."
"Did Harry Styles finish high school? Oh I'm glad the internet asks," he laughed, "Contrary to popular belief I did finish high school, I completed my GCES and I graduated, I don't know why there's a rumor there that I didn't finish high school tho."
"Anyway, last one!" he comically threw the board to the floor and grabbed the final board a crew member was handling him, "Who is Harry Styles best friend? Um, I have a ton of best friends. Jeff who's also my manager, Mitch who plays in my band, my childhood best friend's name is Johnny, so yeah, I'm very lucky in the friends department, I love my friends."
"Who does Harry Styles look like? My mom, I would say. A lot of people point out that we have the same smile," he shrugged, "My mom is a beautiful woman so I'm flattered."
"Who did Harry Styles write Love Of My Life about? My wife and London."
"And final question," he slowly peeled off the sticker for dramatic effect, "Who does Harry Styles love? Okay, that's cute that people search for that on the internet, um, I love my family and friends, I love my wife that's for sure, I love making music and performing," he listed with his fingers, "And love love, yeah, love is great."
He smiled to the camera and put the board aside to say his goodbyes.
"I thought my Google searches were much more appropriate that I expected. I was fun to see what people wonder about me, so yeah thank you WIRED for having me."
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theabigailthorn · 5 months
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Hey I’ve been a fan for a little while now, and I just wanted to say that you’ve been an inspiration for me, a younger transfemme. But I do wanna also ask: what’s it like being a trans woman with her life together? I’m 19 (as of sending), been on hrt for almost 5 months, and have been trans for a year and change. But I’m scared. So, I guess, I wanted to ask: does being trans ever become the norm, my baseline? What’s it like after 2-3 years? And does it get any less confusing or scary?
I think there are a few things going on here.
I don't have my life together as much as it might seem; I just don't show you all the ways it's not. I don't talk publicly about the auditions I don't get, or the things I try and fail at, or the insecurities in my own head that hold me back sometimes, or the handful of decisions I've made that were bad calls and which still keep me up occasionally. I've talked about trauma and mental illness in the past, but I only ever discuss stuff I'm comfortably over - when I'm overwhelmed or in the middle of a crisis I don't post about it. I don't set out to deceive you by presenting myself that way, I just keep my most private stuff private. Everybody has failures and regrets and insecurities: "it's a sign of having lived," as my friend Phoebe told me today. But you see a curated version of me that appears not only more together than the real person, but more together than any real person.
Also, if you're 19 a lot of your life hasn't been in your control until pretty recently and a lot of it still might not be. I'd say it's okay to not feel like you have it all together. You just transitioned, which I think is one of the hardest things a human being can do: you can give yourself credit for that even if you feel like you're not settled into it yet. Congratulations!
As for it becoming the baseline, I mean yeah? Kinda? At least for me. Sometimes I forget. I had a moment today in the gym where I saw a man and I was like "Oh yeah, I used to be one of them, sortof? Weird!" The first year is the hardest, or so they say. I wouldn't say I get less confused or scared now, just scared and confused in different ways. I worry less about getting attacked in the street than I did in my first year, for example. (I'm lucky and privileged in that regard.) But I worry a lot more about other people. I struggle a lot with survivor's guilt, which is something only people who survive get! Anyone who's had a drink with me in the last six months has heard me beat myself up because the night of The Prince premiere in New York was the night of Brianna Taylor's vigil in the UK. That wasn't a deliberate decision - the premiere was booked and paid for months before she was even killed - but I've become a lot more sensitive to those sorts of feelings precisely because I spend less time worrying about myself. I'm more aware now of what my transness means for other people. Like, I made an ironic joke when I came out that I'd become The Transgender Princess of TERF Island, and it's kindof haunted me since - I didn't set out to become "a famous trans person" but it's happened a little bit and it's going to happen a lot more next year. That comes with serious responsibilities and a few mild drawbacks, as well as perks, obviously. So I guess that's a longwinded way of saying I might be a weird person to ask this question because, at least for right now, my transness, my whole self, doesn't just belong to me.
Oh also, some great advice I got from my friends: Paris: "Only change the things that bother you on your good days," and Mattie: "Don't believe anything you think about your life after 9pm."
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str4wbaeby · 6 days
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𝓶𝓪 𝓶𝓾𝓼𝓮 pt.1
ᵒᵇˢᵉˢˢᵉᵈ ᵃᵘᵗʰᵒʳ ˣ ᵇᵒᵒᵏʷᵒʳᵐ ʳᵉᵃᵈᵉʳ
⤷ note : pt.2 | pt.3 | moodboard
his presence lingered in every corner of the bookstore, name spoken in reverent tones by both staff and patrons alike. and who he might be? the literary virtuoso, Ren Takahashi, who recently emerged as a new generation fiction writer, standing as a towering figure in the realm of literature. despite being a new name in the writing community, he was quick to rise to fame with the release of his latest masterpiece, which depicted the story of a yearning painter desperately in search of his muse; the story mainly revolving around the theme of lovesickness.
being an avid book lover, it was not unusual for you to keep up with the latest updates in the community, be it newly released books or the newly emerging writers. for you, Ren was not an unfamiliar name but you never really felt truly drawn to any of his writings, which often tended to revolve around a similar theme of infatuation and obsessive love.
as you made your way through the aisles, you couldn't help but notice the prominent display of his new novel on the central shelf, the vibrant red cover drawing you in. opening the glass panel, you carefully took the book out. as you started to read, your expression quickly shifted with eyebrows furrowing into concentration as your lips curled into a smile of intrigue. turning the pages with a gentle flutter, you seemed to absorb each word presented before you. completely enamoured by the book, you failed to notice the presence of an unknown figure, leaning against the opposite bookshelf, eyes longingly staring at your small figure
"so, do you like the book?", the figure softly spoke out, careful not to startle you while clearing his throat in the process.
needless to say, you were a bit startled at first but the gentleness of his voice oddly managed to calm you down almost instantly. you were never really much of a talker, thanks to your introverted nature and not wanting to make this interaction any awkward, you just found it easier to nod your head in response. your eyes were still fixated on the pages, only to look up at the figure once you were satisfied with thorough scanning of the book. infront of you stood the most gorgeous men you have ever laid your eyes upon in your 23 years of living. luscious long hair tressed a shadowy cascade against his pale porcelain skin, hazel eyes twinkling under the bright store lighting as his 6'2 figure stood towering over you, leaning against the wooden shelf in a relaxed stance.
a shade of pink subconsciously coated your cheeks, as you struggled to maintain eye contact with the handsome stranger.
"do you come here often ?", his velvety voice echoed in your ears, slowly luring you in like a siren's song. at the sudden loss of words, all you could do was nod at his question in agreement.
noticing your flustered state, he chuckled softly, silently taking in your adorable expression and soft features.
"say, would you like to have a cup of coffee with me at the nearby cafe? I've heard their pastries are quite popular here"
the proposal was unexpected. especially coming from someone like him; someone as beautiful as him. you were average to say the least, easily passing as just another face in the crowd. why would he want someone like you?
quickly snapping out of your trance, you politely denied his offer with a firm "no". but why? didn't you like him too? the dejected look in his eyes reminded you of a lost puppy. concealing the pain with a fake smile, he handed you his number in a piece of paper, telling you to call him if you ever wanted to talk or had a change of heart regarding your little coffee date. or he could just show up at the bookstore to meet you again? you wouldn't suspect anything, right? it'll just be another coincidence, after all! ♡
with a seemingly disinterested look, you took the paper out of his hand, only to catch a quick glimpse of something that caught your eyes.
"(555) 867-xxxx
- Ren Takahashi "
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demilypyro · 9 months
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Okay since this doesn't seem to want to go away here's me addressing every single "allegation" that I've heard about. I hope to have at least given a good explanation where the horrible things being said about me came from, and why I consider them either just totally not true or badly misconstrued. Some of my friends have recommended I don't say anything at all, but I've always preferred openness and honesty, so I hope that's appreciated.
I understand that some people will still dislike me even though the things being said about me are not true. That's fine. I don't need everyone to like me, but it's when I'm being consistently harassed and lied about that it interferes with my mental health and ability to work. So I'm gonna try and end things with this.
"She's racist"
From what I can tell this is about one time when I said I keep my interest in anime to myself around new people. I do this because showing you're a Huge Fucking Nerd right off the bat can make a bad impression. I could have said the same thing about Star Trek or comic books, I just happened to be talking about anime in that moment. Someone seems to have misconstrued this as me finding Japanese culture something shameful and lesser than other cultures?... Which I would call a total willful misinterpretation. The rest of this seems to stem just from being Dutch, because the Netherlands is a country that has a problem with xenophobia. This is true, but uhhh I'm mixed myself so I'm pretty well aware of that, and I obviously don't support our infamous "blackface holiday." Just because I live here doesn't mean I agree with everything this country does, be that historically or in the modern day.
"She's friends with racists/misogynists/transphobes"
The only thing I can guess this is about is when I was mutuals with a user called porko-rosso at least 5 years ago and didn't really believe it when people told me they were a bigot. I haven't interacted with this user in over 4 years but people still claim we're like best friends, which was never true in the first place, we just knew a lot of the same people. Most of the resentment from the people who repeatedly spread these rumours about me seems to have started here. So for the record: no, I am not friends with any racists, misogynists or transphobes.
"She thinks she's better than other trans women because she passes better"
This is just not true. This idea seems to pop up just whenever I post about enjoying the benefits of HRT or surgery, but most recently this was misconstrued from a post where I said being trans is about being yourself as much as possible. Since this was in response to someone saying that me trying to pass is "erasing my identity", people thought I meant trying to pass is the same as being good at being trans, which was not what I meant, but some people didn't seem to want to believe me when I clarified. My apologies for the misunderstanding I guess, but that's all it was. So no, I do not hate people who don't pass as well as I do, nor do I think all trans people should be transitioning medically, and I resent the implication.
"She has a secret discord server where she makes fun of pictures of other trans women and calls them slurs"
I had absolutely no clue what this was about when I first heard it. I was sent screenshots that supposedly prove this but all they show is me being rude about someone's appearance one time in january of 2022. I actually thought these were faked because I don't remember this happening and the things said confused me, but one of my friends says she found it was in her server, where she had showed a picture of someone and asked everyone present (mostly other trans women) if they were hot. Apparently I did not think they were hot. So yes, I did insult someone's appearance back in january 2022, but it was an isolated incident. Frankly even I find my remarks in these screenshots distasteful, I don't know what I was on when I wrote that stuff. I'm sorry to that person specifically. What I said has weighed heavily on me and I apologize for it. It's not something I approve of, and don't intend to repeat that mistake. Still, to say it means I hate trans women and I love to make fun of them in my secret discord server and call them slurs is just... a super-villain level of exaggeration. I didn't even know about the word that was named as an example. It's not true.
"She's often rude"
I can't deny this one. Autism gonna autism. I've seen many therapists, doctors, experts, what have you, to try and help me with this, but it seems my particular brand of autistic in combination with the cultural differences between mine and other countries just really often ends with my foot in my mouth when I speak English. I apologize! I have never meant to personally offend anyone. It just keeps happening and I can't stop it from happening.
If after reading all this, you still consider me bad enough to hate my guts, I can't stop you, but I wanted to have at least had my say. I swear that everything in this post is the honest truth as I understand it, and that I've never acted with purposeful malicious intent.
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katsu28 · 7 months
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can I request “Baby’s Breath - a wholesome moment” with our favorite grump remus? maybe just some domestic fluff?
i've been delving deeper into my marauders phase lately so thank you so much for this request <3 he's not too much of a grump in this one but i can give u soft bf remus today i hope that's okay
remus lupin x reader, 1k, fluff fluff and more fluff
Remus never thought he’d ever have a life like he had now. He’d always thought he was destined to live a life of solitude, a life where nothing good and nothing pure ever dared come his way. Sure, he had his best mates and they were more than he could ever ask for, but he wanted…more.
He always felt a tiny gnaw in his gut thinking about Lily and James, Marlene and Dorcas—they were happy, they were as infatuated with each other as the day they met. He didn’t resent them, he wasn’t jealous of them, but he wanted what they had. He wanted a love as strong as theirs with someone of his own. 
Never in a million years did he think he’d get the chance to have something like that. 
Then you came along, and you were good and pure and about a hundred other things Remus adored. You were kind and caring and made his heart thump a little faster and a little harder against his ribcage. It took a bit of time for him to fully let you in, to fully trust you with everything he had, but you were patient with him. 
From there, being with you was something straight out of his fantasies. You had your ups and downs like every healthy couple, but you always talked it out like the mature young adults you were and made up quick.
He now understood what it felt like to love someone more than life itself, to love another person so much that he couldn’t imagine a world without you in it.
Fast forward to present day, you and Remus had recently moved in with each other. It was nothing special, just a small flat in central London—but it was special to Remus. It was where you’d begun the rest of your life together only a few months ago, tiny (some would call it cramped, but you and Remus didn't think so) and a little bit weathered, but it was yours. It was home. 
There were still a few half unpacked boxes laying around, but for the most part you’d settled in nicely. With that new home came a new routine too, with Remus juggling his jobs at the old secondhand bookshop down the road and handling the finances at Sirius’s auto garage. He came home late sometimes, exhausted and smelling of motor oil despite being cooped up in the back office all day. 
“Rem!” You greeted him happily like you always when he stepped through the door, making your way over to where he was hanging his scarf on the coat hooks to hug him tightly.
It was always the highlight of his day, getting to come to you. His bones ached and he felt sticky and grimy, but then you kissed him and it suddenly didn’t feel like the worst thing in the world. 
“Hi, love,” He replied softly, sinking into your embrace with closed eyes.  
Your fingers curled into the hair at the nape of his neck, scratching gentle circles that had him melting just a little bit more. “How was your day?” 
“Same as always. Paperwork, paperwork, more paperwork.” He pulled away from you, lacing his fingers through yours to tug you along behind him into the kitchen. “James brought by some Peruvian takeaway for lunch though, really good stuff—we should try it one day, I think you’d like it.”
“Oh! That reminds me, Lily rang earlier, asked if we had any time tomorrow to pop by theirs for something? She wouldn’t say what but I think she’s pregnant.” 
Remus chuckled, amused. “What makes you say that?” 
“Sirius said he could smell something different about her.” 
“And you trusted him? He’s a knob.” 
“He’s your best friend.” 
“Still a knob.” He replied, pulling open the cupboard to grab a mug. “Tea?” He grabbed another one at your eager nod, busying himself with filling the kettle and setting it on the stove to boil. 
You’d moved to the countertop in the meantime, socked feet swinging, thumping against the cupboards below with each movement. You were smiling warmly at him when he turned back to face you, watching him shuffle around the tiny kitchen like you’d never seen anything more interesting. 
“What?” 
“Nothing.” He arched a brow at you. “Nothing, I’m just…really happy. Here. With you. In our own home.” 
Remus brightened noticeably, coming over to run a light hand down your arm until your fingers were intertwined. He brought it up to his lips and kissed your knuckles. “It’s nice, innit?” 
“Everything’s nice with you.” You were quite aware of how sappy you sounded, but it was true. Just existing in the same space as Remus, sharing a space with him, was so lovely and comforting and everything you'd ever wanted. You traced along the scar bridging his nose, following it down his cheek until your arms found their home looped around his neck and you pulled him in even closer, kissing him softly. 
He wasted no time kissing you back. He never did. Remus loved kissing you more than he loved a lot of things in this world, and he made sure you knew it with every single one. 
Somewhere in the background you heard the kettle whistling over on the stove, but you didn’t really feel the need to pay it any mind. Not when he was kissing you like this, like he wanted to get lost in your touch, like he always did. It wasn’t until it started to annoy you that you splayed your palms against the soft wool of his jumper. 
“You better get the kettle before it boils over.” You murmured against his mouth, barely giving him an inch of space between the two of you. 
Letting out a gentle huff, Remus fumbled for his wand in the pocket of his trousers, pulling it out and mumbling an incantation under his breath with the flick of his wrist. The kettle fell silent. “Right, now where were we?” 
“Pretty sure your mouth was on mine.” 
“Ah yes, how could I ever forget?”
follow @katsu-library to be notified when i post a new fic :)
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genericpuff · 1 month
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STAY OFF MY TERRITORY - Time Travel in Lore Olympus (feat. Springlock, our resident time traveller)
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AH YES. TIME TRAVEL. BUILDING COFFEE TABLES FROM IKEA. BOTH A MESS, BOTH SOMETHING YOU SHOULD NEVER ATTEMPT EVEN AS A GAG.
THERE WILL BE FASTPASS SPOILERS IN THIS ANALYTICAL DISSECTION OF LORE OLYMPUS' TIME TRAVEL !!!
Let's establish the "time travel" in LO first of all - it's briefly introduced by Hecate, who says that Hades isn't in a 'where' but a 'when' , hahahaha i so love time travel jokes /s THIS ISN'T A LAUGHING MATTER-
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We had already covered this in the criticisms that Kronos' 'dream comas' would have been better allocated to his time travel abilities, and it seems now Rachel is trying to make that a reality at the last possible minute. I'm going to completely tear apart that reality to present to you why it doesn't work in LO.
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Aw, Kronos' time abilities are finite? Get on my level, sir.
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The caveat is the existential toll that time travel takes on the jumper, and the fact that in most cases, it's impossible to perform due to paradoxes. And Lore Olympus' time travel presents a lot of paradoxes. No wonder Kronos went crazy, I'm going crazy just thinking about everything that's wrong with this.
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So Hades is trapped 'somewhere' in time. This isn't something I haven't seen before, but the issue it presents is getting someone back to their present time, as it presents the first paradox -
PARADOX #1 - There are no accidents. If someone is to jump into a timeline outside of their own, even if by 'accident', that would still have to be predestined by the timeline itself. This is in line with the grandfather paradox, which I will let the almighty Google define for us all to keep things brief:
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You cannot travel back in time 'by accident'. If you were to travel back in time, it would have been written into the script of reality already, so any effects caused by your jumping would be purposeful, even if they seem like 'accidents' to you - such as becoming your own grandfather, Philip J Fry.
Moving on, in the most recent FastPass episode, Melinoe reveals that she was taken from her timeline by Kronos.
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PARADOX #2 - Which version of Kronos took her? Was it the present version travelling into the future to take her from her timeline into his present? Or was it some future version of Kronos who has escaped yet again at some point in the future and then travelled back into the past to interfere with the events of the current present, possibly in an attempt to rewrite the script? If it's the latter, this means that Hera and Persephone can't feasibly stop Kronos indefinitely, as to stop Kronos would mean that he wouldn't exist in the future to take Melinoe from her future timeline and thus this present timeline of events would cease to exist. If we want to get even more granular with it, 'present' Kronos is still 'past' Kronos as it's the Kronos from ten years ago who got his hands on a deity to help him mess with people's dreams, and that deity has been revealed to be Melinoe, who would have had to be ripped from some point in their future timeline. This falls in line with a temporal paradox, or as most people know it, the 'kill baby Hitler' paradox, which designates that one cannot go back in time to kill baby Hitler, as killing baby Hitler would remove all the subsequent events that would lead up to you deciding to build a time machine and go back in time to kill baby Hitler.
Melinoe claims she's only been here a few days. That would be all well and good, as time is funny like that - I've done my fair share of jumps into the distant past only to return a few minutes later - but what doesn't line up is the present timeline of events that would only work unless she's actually been trapped for longer than a few days.
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PARADOX #3 - So it's only been a few days, but Hades and Persephone have known about this child trapped in Tartarus for weeks, and we know Kronos has had her since the dream diving arc back near the end of S2. So unless Kronos is simply jumping to different points in time to cause shenanigans - which leads to even MORE paradoxes as you feasibly cannot travel to your own past to change it due to it creating a different future - then it can't have only been a 'few days' for Melinoe, it would have been at least a few weeks, giving some wiggle room to the past events of her appearing before Hades in his dreams due to her being the goddess of nightmares. Kronos escaping Tartarus after using Melinoe to put people to sleep and possess them was not something that happened in a pocket dimension, it was very real and very present.
Hades commits an even bigger sin, however, and the biggest issue with this 'time travel' plotline:
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PARADOX #4 - I truly hope 'home' means 'home point in her timeline' and not their literal home. Hades and Persephone cannot take Melinoe, for two reasons: they haven't had their daughter yet, and the future timeline versions of Hades and Persephone need their daughter back. If Hades and Persephone were to adopt this version of Melinoe in their present timeline, it would create a clone paradox, as they would have a duplicate Melinoe from the future, OR it would create the grandfather paradox if they opted not to try for a child knowing they already have Melinoe which would erase the whole sequence of events that led to future Melinoe's birth in the first place.
Ultimately Lore Olympus' time travel suffers from the same issue many time travel stories suffer from - not having consistent rules. It is choosing now , near the finale of the series, to introduce time travel, rather than establishing it back in Season 1 when Kronos was first hinted at. It's also still not clear in what Hades' role is in this, as him being taken to a 'when' could still be read as a dream sequence rather than actual time travel. After all, Kronos supposedly "exhausted" his time travelling powers centuries ago - surely as a way for Rachel to have her cake and cover for the fact that she's had Kronos in the series since S1 and never actually had him do what he's known for - but now she's trying to eat it too by just giving him his time travel powers again for no reason besides rewriting the dream diving finale from S2 but with ambiguous time travel instead.
It's all a huge mess and the best thing I can do for myself is simply not let it keep me up at night. I have enough time travelling problems to worry about as it is. I will be sticking to the Austin Powers method -
youtube
(I am not enjoying myself.)
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crystaldust · 6 months
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If you're feeling stuck with non dualism, this might be able to help you
warning: long post
You get into this philosophy and you see bloggers advice to just claim everything as "not yours, not your problem" and move on with your day. What I'm realizing recently is that maybe not everyone can start off doing that, at least I certainly couldn't.
I believe what they mean by claiming thoughts as not yours is to leave the mind alone so that it can become quiet, as encouraged by Lester in his book. But what he also says is that doing that can be really difficult sometimes if your subconscious is filled with opposing feelings and thoughts to what you'd like to have in your life. So he advised to clear some of that subconscious heavy weight before trying to quiet the mind. (You can read more about this here)
And here's the big breakthrough for me: learning about the Sedona Method and practices of letting go of subconscious beliefs. I went ahead and found more material on it (you can access everything here), I've read some of it and started to apply it.
Now I had been practicing introspection for over a year so I am acutely aware of most of my subconscious issues (which make up this ego's identity in the world) but what I realized was that even though I had been aware of these self issues for a long time, I never tried to let go of them. I've had attached myself to them, claimed them to be my identity, they made me who I was.
With this new knowledge on how to let go, I started to try it out, everytime i felt bad or encountered unwanted circumstances, I'd try my best not to suppress the feelings or thoughts that would come up. Then I started to ask myself "Can I let go of this?" or "Can I let this be / Can I be ok with it?" and if I got an answer of "no" I'd then ask "Why not?" and immediately I'd see that it was just because that's how it is for the ego, it's a habitual pattern. And by now I already know that memory and continuity are part of the ego illusion so there's no real standing for these patterns to be in place. I just kept them there because I didn't know better.
The more I practiced letting go in this way, the easier it got and now I'm at a place where the mind is starting to naturally grow quieter. I'm not even asking those questions as much anymore, I immediately recognize what's happening and I let it be, whatever it is. It is also easier for me to do self-inquiry now and sometimes I catch myself wanting to focus on finding out my true nature rather than indulging the ego and it's never ending cycle of desiring and suffering.
The ego still wants to think and overanalyze everything, running in circles, but I have this knowing sense that it's useless, there's no point in thinking about anything. I still am experiencing the ego's life just as before but now I am being able to detach, to say "not me, not my problem" and move on mentally quite quickly. I don't dwell on the bad anymore. It happened to the ego and there's nothing they could have done about it, it is what it is, I don't need to entertain it anymore.
I still acknowledge the ego's desires and fears but I can actually leave it alone now, I KNOW it's not my true self and I'm at peace with it. I feel whatever comes up and then a minute later it's gone and I rarely think about it. I'm able to be more present and live in the moment.
All of this is to say that I had to understand and practice letting go to a degree in order to be able to understand and practice what more advanced bloggers recommend.
Final tips: ♡ Practice introspection, go deep and be honest with yourself. Understand who the ego is, what it feels and believes in, how it gets triggered and why. This will make it easier to make peace with it and let it alone. ♡ Start practicing letting everything happen, and I mean everything, every circumstance, every feeling, every thought. Try to control nothing. You might notice that if you let the ego do it's thing, it will pipe down quite easily. ♡ Remember that every single thing comes from the ego, every thought, every feeling, every fear, every doubt, every desire and every circumstance. And the ego is absolutely helpless in it's pursue. You can't help it, what you can do is accept it and love it unconditionally (you can actually do this!)
Big thanks to @4dkellysworld for turning me in the right direction 💖
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AITA for calling my friend spoiled?
So my friend still lives with her parents. She is 27 years old and still has dinner cooked for her every night, has her parents clean her room, has them do her laundry, etc. They only just asked her this month to pay some money towards house bills like internet etc and she complained for hours about them “stealing her money”. Now being spoiled isn’t necessarily a bad thing, it’s great her parents are willing to still do all that for her. The problem is my friend tells anyone and everyone that her parents are abusive.
To be honest she’s pretty bad at remembering events accurately. For example someone will give her constructive criticism, she’ll be a little upset, then with each retelling and the more time that passes she’ll build it up and up in her head until it becomes “this person SCREAMED INSULTS at me” and she’ll be genuinely distressed over it. She genuinely remembers stuff this way, she’s not lying exactly. She’s been upset with me over stuff I’ve supposedly said or done and when I’ve asked her to find the conversation she’s talking about in chat logs etc she’ll look back and realise it never happened or it was said completely differently and then she’ll be shocked and apologise.
The stuff with her parents is the same kind of deal. We’ll be on call, I’ll hear her dad calmly say “Can you put your clothes away in the bathroom please?”, and by the time she’s back she’ll be upset and ask me “Did you hear my dad scream that at me?”
She tells all our friends that her parents are abusive and constantly screaming at her and forcing her to do stuff.
For context as to why this upsets me a bit, I grew up in a hellishly abusive household. Not going to get into details but it went as far as having knives held to me, having my fingers broken, being homeless for almost a year. So hearing her call her parents abusive all the time when they do so much for her and treat her so well and all our friends offering support and joking they'll fight her parents really frustrates me. I watch her and her dad chase each other down the driveway to give each other hugs and I feel so envious of how comfortable and good their relationship is.
I recently stayed with her for a few months while I recovered from a surgery over Christmas and. it just got worse from there.
On Christmas she got more presents than I've ever seen in my LIFE. Her parents got ME more gifts than I've ever gotten! One gift she threw out the instructions and then got frustrated she couldn't work it, and in front of me she called her mom through, and snapped at her that her gift didn't work and it was useless. Her mom apologised and asked if she should return it, and my friend was just like "Well it's too late now isn't it!" I was just sitting there in shock because it felt so rude and ungrateful
The other night we were with friends and she was telling them about how her dad had made a joke about her being spoiled. She turned to me and said “AM I spoiled?” in a way that clearly expected me to say no and back her up.
I just kind of snapped and had enough and I said “Honestly? You’re one of the most spoiled people I’ve ever met.”
I said it in a kind of light-hearted tone and she played it off like a joke, but she seemed really mad I’d said it in front of our friends considering she’s been telling them how bad they are all this time.
Since then I’ve had a couple of our friends come to me and ask what her family is really like and I’ve said I don’t feel right talking to them about it if my friend doesn’t want me to, but it’s made me wonder if I was an asshole for saying it considering it’s clearly made our friends distrust her word now. And they potentially realised I wasn’t joking with the fact they’ve come to ask me privately about it.
AITA for saying it in the way and situation I did?
What are these acronyms?
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just-wrting · 1 year
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Can't Take the Hint
Title: Can't Take the Hint
Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x Reader
Summary: You're having a hard time rejecting guys, thankfully the one you're into helps you out.
Warnings: Creepy guy and smut
Word Count: 2,826
Master List
A/N: This was meant to have more scenes in it, but I've opted to save those ideas for another time. This is also only my third time writing smut so I hope it's not that bad.
“I don’t know Dave. Asking them out seems like a bad idea.”
You hear Hotch’s voice even through the closed door. You want to linger and listen, but there’s a new case. Instead, you knock gently on Rossi’s office door. Within a few seconds, it swings open and Hotch is standing in front of you.
“Garcia said she’s got a case and to come get you guys,” you say. “I’m not interrupting anything am I?”
“No, we were just finishing up. In fact, I’ll walk with you if that’s okay?” Hotch moves toward you, and you back up.
“Sure. Though I hope you don’t mind if I borrow Rossi later. I have some guy trouble that I want his advice on.”
For a split second, he frowns. It’s so quick you think you’re imagining it. You study his face intently, wondering if it was just a trick of the light. There’s no reason that he would be upset about you having guy troubles. He’s just your boss, nothing more.
“Rossi’s advice may not be great, he does have multiple divorces. I could help you.”
“That’s actually why I’d like to talk to him about it. He’s gotten used to rejection.”
You give him a soft smile. He chuckles but doesn’t say anything. You know his offer still stands if you ever need to talk to him. He’s a great boss, and you’re grateful to him for being there for you when you need it.
You do your best to pay attention as Hotch and Garcia present your next case. A couple of bodies turned up in a forest on the west coast, and the local police had no idea how they got there. They all showed various stages of decay, indicating that they had been there for a different amount of time each.
“Well, the ME states the body that had been there the longest was there for about a year. Given that there are six bodies in that area that puts us at a murder every two months,” Emily says while placing her tablet down.
“So either he’s doing something to them that takes about two months, or he’s being extra careful.” Rossi rubs his chin.
Reid leans back in his chair. “Based on the ME’s report of the most recent body, he’s most likely torturing his victims for about a month.”
“Great. Cause that’s what we need to be doing, scouring the missing persons reports for a person that could be joining the body pile,” you groan.
Granted, Garcia is lightning-fast and great at sifting through things like that, but you still think it’ll take forever. This is shaping up to be one of those cases that just takes time. Time that you don’t have to be wasting on dead ends and possibilities.
“Wheels up in thirty,” Hotch says, snapping you out of your thoughts. “Be prepared for long days.”
It’s been over an hour and everyone is just lost in thought. Occasionally someone will throw out an idea, but without doing more interviews and crime scene analysis, there isn’t much to discuss. You take the opportunity to slide into a seat across from Rossi.
“Mind if I ask you some stuff? Take your mind off the case for a second?” you ask. “I promise I’ll be quick.”
Rossi gives you a smile. “Sure thing, kid. What else is someone with as much wisdom as I, supposed to do?”
You relax muscles you didn’t realize were tense. “Besides helping others out, I’m not too sure. So there’s this guy, I see him all the time since he goes to the same breakfast place as I do, and he asked me out.”
Rossi nods. “And you aren’t sure if that’s a good choice?”
“Actually, I know it’s a bad choice. Since the day before I’d seen him with another girl. They’re obviously a thing so I told him no. The problem is that now he won’t leave me alone. I don’t know what I did wrong.”
Rossi reaches out to grab your hand. He gives it a gentle squeeze and makes sure to look into your eyes.
“Kid, you didn’t do anything wrong. A man like that is just plain creepy and probably won’t take the hint until you tell him there’s another man you're with. If you need us to, I’m sure Hotch or Morgan will gladly help you play pretend to get him to leave you alone. We’re here to help each other.”
You slowly nod. You really didn’t think you’d actually encounter one of those guys that give off the same energy that serial stalkers have, but you did. Not to mention, it was while you weren't working.
“You’re right. I’ll give it some thought during the case, but for now, that’s what needs our attention. Let’s just hope things go better than they usually do.”
Things are not going better than they usually do. Hotch paired you with him and Morgan to go to the crime scene which wouldn’t have been an issue if it wasn’t for the constant drizzle that had started well before you had landed. Nothing says ‘a great day for a walk in the woods’ like rain.
You watch as an officer slips slowly down the hill to reach where the last body was found. The whole area was slick with mud. It’d probably be fun if you were a young boy in your own backyard but as an agent hoping to get an idea of what this dump site looked like in its horrible prime, not so fun.
The rain picks up and you duck under a tree. Hotch joins you while Morgan chuckles.
“I’ll go get the umbrellas from the SUV since you two must be made of sugar. Don’t start without me.”
Shortly after Morgan walks off, another officer approaches you. He sticks his hand out for you to shake.
“You must be Agent Hotchner and Agent (L/N),” he says while giving you a large smile. “Do you need an umbrella? I have one in the car.”
“Oh no thanks. Agent Morgan is returning with the ones he went to get. I can see him now.”
The officer’s smile wavers, but stays firm on his face. “Well, (L/N), I’m Officer Mike Morris. If you need anything, anything at all, let me know right away and I’ll help you.”
With that, the officer leaves. Hotch looks at you with an odd look on his face. You can’t quite place the emotion that’s behind his eyes.
“Here’s the umbrella. You two can share it because I’m not letting (L/N) pull me down into the mud.”
Morgan gets a head start down the hill. You watch him complete the task with ease, and you can’t help but be a bit envious. Sure you can take down grown men, but Morgan makes most physical feats look easy.
“(Y/N)?” Hotch’s voice snaps you out of your thoughts. “You do know that if you need anything, both on the case and off the case, you can talk to me, right?”
His hand rests on your shoulder. You give him a smile and start to head down the slope.
“Of course. You’re my go-to person if I need something, Hotch. I’ll let you know if I need anything.”
It’s the next day, and you’re sitting at the table staring down a pile of paper. It’s early in the morning, and you think you’d kill for a cup of coffee right about now. Unfortunately, you got up early and were one of the first in the office. That means that there was no coffee for you to have and you have to wait for some to brew.
A sudden knock on the doorway startles you. You whirl around to find Officer Mike Morris standing in the doorway.
“I see you’re into mornings, just like I am. Figured you would want a cup of coffee.”
He sets down a cup of lukewarm coffee. You watch as the liquid settles and realize that the color is off. It won’t taste the way you like it, but you do your best to take a sip. You’re right. It’s not how you’d like it.
“(Y/N)? You left early today so I brought you coffee and breakfast. I hope that’s okay.”
Hotch walks into the room holding a tray of coffee and a to-go bag. He briefly looks at Officer Morris before looking at you.
“Thanks! What did you get me?”
A soft smile spreads across Hotch’s face. He sets the coffee tray down and pulls one of the cups out. You carefully read the label on the cup. It’s made just the way you like. As you take a sip, you feel the caffeine send tingles to your brain and you start to wake up.
“And breakfast?”
Hotch pulls a muffin out of the bag and hands it to you. You're quite grateful for the snack. Nothing says FBI breakfast like coffee and a pastry.
“Thank Hotch. I got up pretty early so I didn’t have a chance of getting food.”
You bury your face back into the papers, ignoring the men. You can feel the tension in the room though. They seem to be locked in some sort of silent fight, over what you can’t tell. A fight over ruining your train of thought is possible, but you can’t imagine that making you useless was a great idea.
“Well, (L/N), I’ll see you later. Don't be a stranger,” Officer Morris says before leaving.
“Oh, I call shotgun!” You say as you open the passenger door.
Hotch slides into the driver's seat. “As long as you don’t touch the radio we’ll be fine.”
Before the two of you can leave the parking lot, there’s a knock on your window. Hotch is quick to lock the doors. You frown when you see it’s Officer Morris. He seems to be everywhere. If it wasn’t for the fact that he didn’t fit the preliminary profile, you’d assume he was the unsub.
Rolling down the window, you ask, “ Was there something you needed, Officer Morris?”
“I heard you were headed to see the Willows and I figured I should come with. They’re grumpy and old so they don’t take well to strangers. I actually happen to know them quite well and am off duty now.”
You glance at Hotch, unsure of how you should shut Officer Morris down. Hotch’s mouth is drawn in a thin line and his eyes are cold. You can practically feel the irritation coming off him and you turn your gaze to the clock. Staring at the time seems like a better choice.
“I think (Y/N) and I will be fine. We’re both highly capable agents who’ve dealt with difficult people.”
Morris smiles tightly. “I’m sure (L/N) is an exceptional agent, but I can assure you that these aren’t your ordinary grumpy old people. We got a call once that Mr. Willow tried to shoot the mailman when he got too close.”
You hear the leather squeak as Hotch’s hand tightens on the steering wheel. He’s getting far more than irritated. In fact, you’d venture to say he was getting pissed. It wasn’t hard to tell why. Morris is wasting your time.
“Aaron is a more capable agent than I am!” you blurt out. “So if you don’t mind, we’ll be off. Serial killers don’t wait around for us to find our clues.”
You let Hotch roll up your window and drive off. As soon as you start rolling, you see him relax.
“Man, he just won’t let up. Is there something I’m missing?” you ask.
“If he gives you any more trouble, I’ll take care of it.”
“Is that a promise?”
“Of course.”
It finally hits you once Morris grabs your wrist. His grip is tight. You shake your hand a couple of times, but he still holds fast.
“I’ve been hoping that I could get a chance to talk to you alone, (Y/N). I was wondering if you’d like to join me for dinner.”
The whole time you had been here, Morris was hitting on you. You pride yourself on being able to read people, but you admit that your ability to spot romance is a bit lacking. Unfortunately, you have zero interest in going out with Morris. Not only is he being quite rude at the moment, but you had no intention of going long distance. Not to mention your lingering feelings for someone else.
“Well, given that we still haven’t caught the killer, I’ll have to decline. There’s no time to waste.”
His grip tightens even more before he releases you. His eyes are dark and he’s sporting a tight frown.
“Does Agent Hotchner not let you date?”
You stare at him in shock. “Excuse me?”
“Is Agent Hotchner interfering with your personal life? Does he dictate whether or not his team members can date?”
You shake your head. “No, he doesn't. This is a personal choice. I’d rather not go to dinner with you when I have a serial killer to catch.”
Morris says nothing, but you can tell he doesn’t believe you. His animosity toward Hotch confuses you. You don’t bother trying to understand it, however. There isn’t anything about this guy that is making sense.
“If you don’t mind, I’m going to go back to my team. If you need anything, feel free to contact one of them.”
With that, you turn and walk back to the main room. You want nothing more than to have someone tell him off, but you opt not to mention anything. The team has other things to worry about.
Once again, Morris has done his best to ask you out. This time making the mistake of asking in front of Hotch. The tension in the room grows thick, and you feel uncomfortable. You can see Hotch seething.
“I don’t think-“
You’re cut off by Hotch. “You are to leave (Y/N) alone for the rest of this case, Officer Morris.”
His voice is icy. There’s a vein popping in his forehead and his hand is tight on the file. There’s no one else in the room to stop the fight that’s about to break out.
“(Y/N) doesn’t need to date whoever you approve of Hotchner. You’d be stepping out of your boundaries by making that choice.”
Hotch strides over to where you’re standing. He tosses the file onto the desk next to you and grabs your face. Within milliseconds, he’s pulled you into a kiss.
His lips are chapped and you let his tongue enter your mouth you can faintly taste blood. He’s passionate about it. One hand reaches around to the back of your head to keep you in place. There’s more force than necessary, and you feel yourself growing light-headed.
You don’t know how long he’s kissing you for, seconds or minutes, and it doesn’t matter. He’s set a fire inside of you and you find yourself whining when he pulls away. He’s careful to keep you close though.
“If you don’t mind, Officer Morris, (Y/N) and I will be leaving.”
Aaron pins one of your legs up against your body with the other wrapping around his waist. Your ankle is behind his head and you feel sweat fall from his brow.
“Why didn’t you tell him off sooner?”
You can’t answer his question with anything but a moan. You arch your back as he continues to pound you. Your body craves him and you feel delirious. The only thing you can think about is the way he’s making you feel.
“I could’ve done more to you in that office, but he doesn’t deserve to see you like that.”
Each thrust of his hips punctuates his statement. You can’t even tell what he’s saying though. The only thing on your mind is him. The way he’s filling you up. The way he feels inside of you. The way that each thrust hits that sweet spot makes you moan.
“A-Aaron!” you cry out.
His lips press harshly against yours. With one final thrust, you come undone. Your fingers grip his bicep tightly as you cum and you feel your legs tremble. You’ve been doing this for hours, and you’ve lost count of how many times that was.
When he pulls away, his face is soft. There’s no more anger or jealousy hidden in his eyes and a smile is slowly spreading across his face.
“You aren’t hurt are you?”
You giggle and shake your head. “Just a little out of practice for this. I’ll be a bit sore later but otherwise fine.”
His next kiss is soft and tender. You relish the fact that you’re spending the night with him.
“Good because when we get back to D.C. I’ll have to show you a different side of this. Perhaps after dinner?”
You let your eyes flutter closed. “I think that sounds like a great idea.”
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heyidkyay · 6 months
Text
And I'm petrified of being alone, now |
Part One
Matty Healy x reader
Summary: She’s just trying to get by, really. What with being a single parent to her four year old son whilst simultaneously trying to kick start a successful career as a radio presenter. She’s got everything she’s ever wanted though, friends close by, a mum who’s merely a phone call away, and of course her baby boy. What else is there to wish for? But then, it’s not long before her relatively normal life gets upended and turned on its head, and she’s suddenly forced to deal with situations she’s never even thought to imagine.
What happens when one mention of a certain controversial singer on her show sends a flood of unexpected challenges her way? 
Warnings: This is gonna deal with a lot of controversial shit surrounding Matty and his past I'm ngl, so if you're not into that then I'd suggest not reading this! But if you are, then hi!! I hope you enjoy?
Authors Note: I'm back...:)) Back with a series too, or it will be if this first part goes down well! Lmao so pls don't hate it! Butttt in all honestly, I do have to quickly thank @procrastinatinglikeapro for all the kind words she gave me on the snippets I annoyed her with recently and for forcing me to actually believe in this fic because I very much was on the fence about posting again. So thank youuuu, it means a whole lot<3 Also, the skeleton of this was taken from a very old fic of mine which I started during the height of covid that I've just been thinking about trying to better for a long while now, so... enjoy?
And I guess let me know if this is something anyone would want to read more of? Yeeeeah, I really don't know what else to write here now, it's been a while, so! Hi, help, bye:)
Masterlist
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“Yeah, yeah! I’m really into their sound at the minute! Honestly fell in love with their recent performance at the VMA’s- didn’t overdo it and kept true to themselves. Definitely did a great job there, so well done with that one if you’re listening in, lads!”
I was grinning from ear to ear as I spoke into the microphone before me, which was to be expected whenever I was at work. Strange, yeah I know, but only to any typical person with the usual nine to five, because I truly did love my job. It was tough work, strenuous at times, contrary to what most might believe, but it was pretty much everything I’d ever dreamt of.
See, I’d grown up on the outskirts of this tiny village in the Isles, where everybody knew everything about everybody. Secrets were never well kept- you could just ask our local priest about that one, who had often used to regale most of the confessions he’d heard in the only pub around for miles whenever he was pissed beyond being able to sit on his barstool. And it was also incredibly tight-knit, as in, all the kids who went to school together, then grew up and married one another, settling down and taking over the jobs that their parents or grandparents soon retired from. Hardly anyone moved away, if ever.
In reality though, it was actually just a place I’d always felt like a stranger in. Where I’d struggled to fit in and make friends, to form bonds outside of the one I shared with my mum.
I’d had a tough go of it back in school actually. ‘Mouse’ was what they’d seemingly dubbed me back then, a nickname which had travelled the masses all too quickly seeing as there had only been about sixteen kids in both my year and the one above. 
It had mostly been due to me just having been an extremely timid child, hiding behind my mum’s flowing skirts whenever we went into town and much preferring that of my own company. But that fact hadn’t gotten any easier for me once I’d been forced out of school for a few years after an accident that had flipped my entire life on its head. Resulting in me being further isolated from the rest of the world and my fuck-face of a father running for the hills.
Still. Shit happened, I supposed, and I’d been forced to grow up.
Too quickly, in truth.
So whilst everyone else had been out living, I’d been holed up in our little dove cottage miles away from them all, with only books and music to keep me company. Music which had been a true constant in my life and just about the only thing that had gotten me by.
As well as my mum, who’d forever be my rock. And back when we’d both been growing up, she had always had the tele on full blast throughout the day, cycling through the freeview channels that played the recent top 50 and old school classics.
It was one of my favourite things to look back on now, if she was ever in the mood, or when the power would finally flicker and go out completely, she’d spin this old phonograph her own father had gifted her in the days before she’d left home. The two of us would dance around the living room whilst she’d clean on Saturday mornings and then hum to it as we settled in for a long storm, her working on her trusty crossword whilst I would read or draw. It would croon out old French records she had bought long before she’d moved to the UK, and before she’d ever even met my dad.
And I would just lose myself in it all. 
It wasn’t just the basic premise of music that I had enjoyed though, it was everything else that also came along with it. The opinions, the reviews, the personal stories and thoughts, the way it made a person feel. 
So, for years I would just sit down at the kitchen table and write for hours on end about the sound, the rhythms I’d felt and heard, the lyrics that had had me bellowing out or playing on a never-ending loop in my head. And then, as a teen, Twitter had come along and had been just another way for me to express it all.
That was what had led to all this actually. The radio.
At first, I’d never paid much mind to all of the people who had started to discover the small page I’d created, the users that had enjoyed reading my inner thoughts. But then I had and it had been an insane concept to comprehend, but was also what had, ultimately, pushed me into continuing with it.
From there, opinions on genres of music and their style throughout different decades turned into thoughts on up and coming artists, then actors and other A-list celebrities. So, I’d ended up spending an awful lot of time online, simply just tweeting about it all, on subjects followers had wanted to hear about and answering questions on whether I loved a certain album or new EP. 
The account had grown rapidly after and by the time I’d had the balls to tell my mum I’d wanted to leave home and make a start for myself, in London of all places, it had gained well over fifteen thousand followers.
I went to uni down there and met people. People who didn’t shy away from me or shine a light on my odd quirks. I met my best mate there, too. And Finn was unlike any other. The platonic love of my life, or so I’d dubbed. He was eccentric, witty, and didn’t care about what anyone else thought of him. Forced me to feel that way too, slowly but surely. And it had only taken a few weeks before he'd grown rather suspicious of my constant need to always have my phone near.
He had, pretty early on, decided that I must’ve had some secret boyfriend back at home that I’d yet to tell him about and had annoyed me about it at every twist and turn, basically backed me into a metaphorical corner. So to say I’d relented fairly quickly wouldn’t be a lie, and I’d told him all about the account soon enough.
Finn had actually been the one to suggest that I take it somewhere bigger, make it into something people could tune into and not just read about. I had actually taken that consideration on board way back then, but had only acted on it when shit had hit the fan a year or so later. But we'll get to that.
So with it all, I’d made an actual radio show out of my thoughtless Twitter account, allowing people to listen in and actually get to know the person behind the name.
That was essentially how ‘Mouse On A Mic' had come to life.
Yup, I’d kept the fucking nickname! I couldn’t not in truth, it was familiar, reminded me of the person I once was, and who I am now. But the only difference was, I’d given it a new story. I’d claimed it. 
The show's audience grew fairly quickly during that first year, I was new on the scene and seemingly refreshing. I had a no-bullshit kind of attitude that my listeners admired. I called celebs out on their crap and went to new extremes to conjure up inventive ways to get followers involved. 
Ultimately doing things that other radio presenters were afraid to do at the time. Which was fair enough, in hindsight, they had actual endorsers and brands that were backing them up and funding their streams. Me, on the other hand, had no-one to answer to for my mistakes or any backlash the show received. It was just me, sat alone in my bedroom, speaking into a mic.
Only now, it was me sitting in a quaint little studio in East, not too far from my flat and walking distance from any and every coffee chain London had to offer. 
Anyway, back to the current show! I adjusted my headset over my ear as I wheeled closer to the table, aware of the many monitors and cables I was constantly trying to avoid and glanced upwards, locking eyes with my co-producer, Adi.
The girl shot me a hurried gesture, a circular wave of her hand that had me chuckling to myself even as I waved her off, knowing I’d already gotten off track one too many times this recording. 
"Alright! It seems as though we've got to move on with the next segment of the show now! Unfortunately, Ads here has informed me that I can't just sit around all day and talk about Inhaler forever. A right shame that, don’t you think?”
I huffed theatrically, whilst Adi merely shook her head at me in return, dark ringlets brushing the length of her shoulders as she mouthed the word 'prick' through the thick sheet of plexiglass that separated us.
Ignoring that loving endearment in favour of continuing on with the commentary, I hoped I hadn’t steered too far off track, there was still a lot scheduled for today's show that I had yet to go over.
“So moving on!” I sighed into the mic and rubbed my palms together, “It seems like quite a few of you lot, on Twitter especially, have made it loudly known that you want to hear my thoughts on Manchester’s very own Matthew Healy. God, is there yet another scandal under his belt I don’t yet know about, where’s he finding the time?”
I shook my head briefly and rolled forward in my seat. The wheels squeaked beneath my weight and I made a silent prayer that the mics hadn’t picked up the sound. 
What a fucking topic, I thought quietly to myself and sent Adi a semi-amused smile before I peered down at the recent headline she had handed over to me earlier that morning.
It was the same old thing. Expected really at this point.
“Healy’s at it again! Whatever will we do?” I gasped, dramatising the whole thing as I stared down at the images of the haughty singer that were plastered across the printout I held in front of me. 
There were four of them, a quick succession that had all seemingly come from a clip at a recent concert. Bit blurry but the title gave away to what was happening.
A laugh bubbled up out of me as soon as I read the headline. “Oh god, it appears Matty Healy is- just wait for it!- back at it again, only this time it seems he’s gone and traded off a drumstick for…” I paused to drum quite the anticipating beat against the tabletop, and as stoic as I could, I then added, “A joint!” And a smug grin made its way up onto my lips when I heard Adi’s faint cackle echo from just outside the booth.
“Honestly, I swear that everything this man does makes the rags! Reckon I saw an article about how he took his tea one time. And like, do me a favour, yeah? A man of the people though, in’t he? He’s got to be! I mean, just look at this headline. Fucking who the hell writes this shit?”
Tossers, I supposed. But even so.
“It’s madness.” I muttered, clucking my tongue, “But anyway, I’m guessing that most people claim him to be the epitome of a realtime rockstar, and sure, he might just be. 'Sex, drugs, rock & roll', all that shit. But how much longer is it going to last until everything goes tits up, hey?
“I mean, Healy can pretty much do whatever he wants at this point, he’s got half the world either falling at his feet or complaining about him- has done since he was what, a kid? Following his parents among the shadows of their fame before he stepped out and made an actual name for himself. It is insane to see how much he’s changed though!”
And it was. He and his band had risen to fame so evidently, their music was everywhere, they sold out shows constantly, and had the privilege to fly across the globe doing whatever they pleased. But they’d also practically grown up in the limelight, Matty especially. So it was hard not to notice the resounding changes. 
“But, if I am being truthful. And when am I not? I thought that most of the shit that went around about him at first was a load of crap- publicity of sorts, if you get where I'm going with that. Or just him being an idiot, a lad who’s had to grow up with all these cameras on him all the time and had to basically learn what he can and can’t say in front of them. Slipping up from time to time, like most do. But, now? I’m honestly not too sure… It’s just a bit sad. In’t it? There was so much potential there.”
I shrugged, a hearty sigh falling with my shoulders.
“I actually used to quite like his stuff a couple years ago, he’s got a way with words, with just music overall really. Reckon if he’d gotten his shit together he could’ve been ranked higher up on the list of rockstars. Could’ve changed or paved a way for newer musicians. But not so much anymore. His songs lack the passion they once had, they’re not what they used to be. He works hard, I’ll give him that. But, I can’t help but wonder if it’s just his band pulling his dead weight along with them now.”
I took a slow breath, then gazed down at the small amount of sticky notes I had pinned to the monitor beside me: the next segment. I’d have to wrap this one up quickly.
“Maybe that’s a bit harsh.” I said, “But honestly, I just hope he takes an actual break sooner rather than later. The band looks spent and he just seems like he could do with some time away from all the cameras and prying eyes. Just so he can sort himself out good and proper, you know? Then again, that’s just my opinion among a sea of many.”
Truthfully? I really did think that Matty had talent, and he seemed like a sound enough guy- or at least he had done, a couple of years back, before all the controversy and whatever else. Now though, the guy just seemed so caught up in it all, in the fame, the tabloids, the drama. Unaware of just how far he’d fallen.
Me, I’d seen it one too many times before, with many of the greats even, and as painful as it was to watch, what more could I do, or say? I'm a nobody in comparison.
I blew out a short breath.
“Fuck, that got all serious didn’t it?” I tried to laugh off and only felt a little more at ease when I glanced up and caught Adi’s sincere smile, “Anyway, onto our next segment, reading a couple of your lots tweets! Let's see what everyone's saying about our amazing Adi today, hey? What was it last week, Ads- those yellow trousers you were wearing?”
--
“Oi, will you two stop mucking about, please? We’ve got to get going!” I scolded without any real heat, shaking my head as I held back chuckles, always amused by the infamous pair. 
I’d not long left the studio, having walked with Adi to the nearby train station before heading over to Finn’s, and was currently packing away the belongings that had been messily upended from the Spiderman backpack I was often seen carrying about. 
My gaze wandered over to the other side of the room once I’d teethed together the bag’s plastic zipper, over to where my son, Teddy, was currently in the midst of being whirled around by his godfather, tawny coloured curls flying in every-which direction as his cheeky grin grew even more prominent.
I felt the corners of my mouth tug upwards as I watched my best mate laugh at whatever the toddler had just said, tickling the boy’s sides too. If I was feeling incredibly sappy, I’d tell Finn then just how thankful I was to have him around, because he truly was incredible. 
From the moment I’d found out that I was pregnant, Finn had been there for me. He loved my son almost as though Teddy was his own, he adored the kid like no other and had placed him on a pedestal above everyone else since the day he was born. 
Finn was always free to take teddy whenever I had the show to fret about too, or if I was ever in dire need of another helping hand. He was fiercely protective of the two of us and I knew in the very depths of my heart that there would never be a hair harmed on my son’s head as long as he was around. 
I was pulled from my thoughts just as the toddler in question came bounding over, giggling uncontrollably as Finn chased after him, his arms stretched out wide and crouched down to mimic the small boy's height. I couldn't help but notice the matching grins they both wore.
“Help!” Teddy squealed as he flung himself into my awaiting arms, allowing me to wrap him up and settle him safely on my hip, using my frame as a shield to block him from Finn’s view.
"You can't hide from me Teds, I’ll always find you!" Finn taunted playfully, laughing merrily as he wiggled his fingers at Teddy, who was only just peeking out at him from over my shoulder.
Teddy squirmed in my grasp, giggling and screaming senselessly as he tried to dodge Finn’s oncoming hands that had since managed to softly graze his sides. I could only roll his eyes in fond exasperation, the pair never failing to brighten my day, and I couldn't help but feel ever so grateful for whatever being had brought Finn into both mine and Teddy’s lives.
You see, Finn was the closest thing I’d ever had to a brother, let alone a best friend. He’d been the family I’d never known I’d needed, a home away from home. And I knew that I could always count on him for just about anything and he had proved that the day I’d turned up on his doorstep in the pissing rain one Tuesday night, utterly terrified after having just found out that I was pregnant. 
“Alright, you lot!” I began, batting away one of Finn’s oncoming hands as he made to grab at Teddy's tiny ankle. “We've got to get home in time for your bath and tea, and I think Finn here has to pick up Liv from work.”
I was directing my voice towards the toddler in my arms but also sent a knowing look Finn’s way, one which caused the man’s eyes to widen in immediate realisation. ‘Liv’ was actually Olivia, Finn’s newest fling, only she had managed to last quite a while longer than the rest, a new record for him really. 
“Shit, yeah.” Finn muttered before he hurried over to his desk in the far corner. I could only chuckle quietly, Teddy joining in too when he noticed, and watch on as he hastily started to grab at an array of items, shoving them into his jean pockets. Phone. Wallet. Keys.
When he was finished, Finn spun back around towards us and shot an accusing brow our way, not too pleased about having been the source of our amassment. Teddy and I couldn't help ourselves then and laughed a little harder at his impervious expression. 
With that done and over with, I pressed my nose against the side of Teddy's head and smiled contently into his curls whilst Finn merely rolled his eyes at us, chuckling before he made a start for the door. I followed just behind, Teddy's backpack slung low over my shoulder and a happy little boy nestled in my arms.
***
People lover @/user1 Imagine being a mediocre radio host and thinking you know the ins and outs of the music industry.. #CancelMouse 102 @/user2  Don't mind me, reckon I just found my new favourite radio show:) Ugh! @/user3 Mouse sounded proper excited today but switched up so quick when that 75 bloke came up:// Soloveme @/user4 Hate to see people supporting toxic behaviour, sit down.  Milk @/user5 Don’t hate me, I'll forever be a matty girlie!! But @Mouseonamic I kinda agree?? Paris @/user6 Do you think he’s seen it yet? > Too_shy @/user7 Probably, it’s trending rn >> Drummepls @/user8 Hope he’s okay and doesn’t take it as a personal attack.. 
He should’ve known really.
He should’ve fucking known.
Even in his drunken state he should have known not to look at what they were fucking saying about him. Slumped on the floor of his hotel room, propped up against the bathroom door, too exhausted to think about moving, let alone try.
He’d only heard a snippet, caught the last of it in the cab ride back from the club the band had found themselves in. But he had heard it, and he’d listened. 
"He's got the whole world falling at his feet." He fucking wished. "Changed." Too right. "A load of crap- publicity of sorts, if you get where I'm going with that- but now I'm not too sure." Laughable, man. "It's just a bit sad." The story of his fucking life. "Potential." When’s he never not disappointing someone? "Lacks passion." Passion lies in living, mate, and he hasn't felt alive in a very long time. 
"Not what it used to be." Who he used to be.
He lit another cigarette from a crumpled pack he’d pulled from his back pocket. Watched on as a curl of smoke unfurled in the air. He only wished he’d brought something upstairs with him, or grabbed one of the little bottles from the minibar before deciding he’d needed a piss. But if he closed his eyes hard enough he could imagine it all going dark, the world fading around him. 
Though, even then he still couldn’t quite muffle the loud, pitying laugh that escaped him as he continued to scroll through the mass of tweets that never faltered. They were like a freight train, unable to stop.
Matty wiped his nose on his sleeve.
Never had he ever felt so fucking lost. Desperate for everything to just pause for a second. To stop and leave him alone for a bit. The world to let him wallow in the dark, dank pit he's hollowed out for himself.
But what a fucking life, hey.
Carelessly, he thumbed across the dimming screen, his intoxicated mind too focused on the task at hand to remember why exactly it was he was even sitting there on the cold bathroom floor. Something to do with Hann, he supposed, or George. Perhaps another heated encounter? Probably.
The sound of his phone's keyboard echoed off the surrounding walls and Matty breathed out a self-depreciating chuckle when he clicked send on the tweet he’d curated, not caring enough for the consequences. Hardly even thinking, in truth. He was far too gone to care anymore, already knew firsthand what the consequences would be tomorrow. But at that moment, he just wanted honesty. To tell the truth, for once. To let them all know that he knew he was a shit excuse for a person.
What more could the world possibly say anyway? 
Everyone around him was the same. He was simply just a puppet on a string. They’d make him sing and dance until the day he finally wrapped those wired strings tightly around his neck, and then all they'd be able to do is sit back and watch the show. And he'd enjoy every unabating second of it.
Matty @/trumanblack 10s ago Radio shows are sick man, gotta love them! And I sort of am sad haha. And I do lie, we all lie, I spose. But just listen to the radio, kids!
He laughed silently after, amused with himself, and tossed the phone off somewhere off to the side so he wouldn’t have to look at it again. 
Bullshit. It was all just fucking bullshit.
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astro-enthusiast · 1 month
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Solar Return Observations 1.0
Hello, I'm so excited to write this post! Today I will provide an overview of my most recent solar return chart and how the year manifested for me.
For extra background, this was my 12th house profection year (ruled by Jupiter) and it was just as messy as the astro girlies predicted. 0/10 would recommend. Due to this being my 12th house protection year, I assumed it would be pretty low-key. But, my Leo ascendant had other plans. Note: these observations were made using Tropical astrology and Placidus house system!
Leo Ascendant at 24 degrees: talk about being in the spotlight. To an uncomfortable degree, the focus really was on me this year. What I could do, what my talents are, and undivided attention. For an introvert like myself, this was superrr uncomfy!! Idk how y'all do it. But this was a year where my creativity was able to shine. I spent a lot of time with kids and nurturing my own inner child.
Taurus Sun in 9th house (conjunct mercury, NN and MC): I started and stopped college this year. Apparently I needed to go back to be reminded of how much I despise it. Much to my dismay, I did little to no traveling this year. But these planets are all in Taurus so perhaps that can make them stationary? Sun conjunct NN made it to where my entire being was exactly what I needed to be. I just needed to stand tall and confident (Leo ASC) in who God created me to be.
Speaking of God, with this being my 12th house protection year, I started going back to church, volunteering my time and resources, and standing stronger in my spirituality. I would have NEVER made it through this year without this!
Aquarius Pluto in 6th house square Taurus Sun: I thought I was gonna d*e like a thousand times when I seen this aspect/placement. Y'all I was scurred, but still I rise! This year was certainly strange. At times it felt as if I was my own worst enemy. Battling inner battles every moment of the day. I joked that each week I was a new person, but honestly, this was the truth. Pluto doesn't let you stay the same. My routine changed a lot this year and I ended up working in a career I have never even considered! I also started posting on social media a lot more and even made a YouTube channel!
Cancer Moon conjunct Cancer Mars in 11th house: this also frightened me. I'm a natal Cap moon so to give me a Cancer moon?! Baby, idk what to do with this...but we made it work! My energy levels were very much dependent on my mood and emotions so that was icky. My relationship with my mother pretty much carried me through this year. In whole signs, this moon is placed in the 12th house which I found very interesting as my mother suffered some mental health issues and had to go away for a bit. I did partake in more social gatherings this year, although I won't say I necessarily gained more friends. Friendly gatherings felt more purposeful and I felt much less anxiety compared to what I would typically feel.
Scorpio IC: a majority of my transformations took place at home. I would go to sleep and energetically wake up a completely different person.
Taurus Mercury square Leo Ascendant: the way I articulated myself was in direct contrast with the way I presented myself. My appearance was very bold and hard to ignore, but my voice was very soft-spoken, yet straight to the point. I also noticed that people expected me to be one way, but when I opened my mouth and was a straight shooter, it took people aback, Like yeah, you weren't expecting me to be a bad*ss were you? Also Sun conjunct Mercury and Mercury conjunct Uranus so I stood on business!
Aries Chiron at a Leo degree: You know what's worse than being projected into the spotlight? Being in the spotlight, but cringing the entire time because you don't want people to see who you truly are. Flaws and all. This was how this placement manifested for me. I've always struggled with self-acceptance but the universe really said it's time to tackle this head on! Not an easy feat...
7th house Pisces Saturn at a Leo degree: Dang, Leo energy was on me bad this year! Well, I experienced my first committed romantic relationship with a Pisces Rising! It only lasted a few months, but the levels of delusion were insane. Definitely someone I shouldn't have been with to begin with, but you don't know unless you try, right? Saturn sextile my NN and Sun, so it was for character development hahaha.
10th house Gemini Venus at Leo degree: I've had this placement in plenty of my Solar Returns and each time I thank God it's only for a year. But it's a cute lil placement for the time being. With Venus in the 10th house, I found it very easy to charm people and get on their good side. Especially after just one conversation. I didn't have any love triangles cause I don't play that, but I did have quite a few people tryna be my boo...Venus square Neptune added to the delusion I had going and Sextile Chiron helped me to heal relationship issues and my relationships with women! Ooh, Gemini rules the hands and I created a lot of beauty this past year! Especially on the internet. I was also incredibly loved at work. People bringing me gifts and buying me food regularly. I could get used to this lol.
10th house Taurus Uranus conjunct MC: drastic and unexpected changes in my career and reputation. One minute no one knew me and next minute I'm Ms. Popular?? Okay, popular for ME lol. I was nervous in my career because I was doing stuff I had never done before. My job seemed fairly stable and chill. I appreciated this vibe greatly.
These are some of the placements/aspects that stood out to me this last year. Feel free to shed some light on your personal experiences with these placements either natal or solar return. :)
Please do not under any circumstances copy, rewrite, reword, or repost my work without crediting me.
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androhtl · 1 year
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THAT'S JUST WHAT COUPLES DO, NO? — tom kaulitz
hello my loves!! hope you guys enjoy this little oneshot that i put together! if you want a part two please just let me know! now a little bit about the story you are about to read and a couple of heads up!
english is NOT my first name so if you see any grammatical errors please do let me know so i can correct them.
the german that i will be using comes from my 7 or so years of learning german at school. with that being said if i wrote something that makes zero sense please do let me know!
this is very bad and rushed but i just wanted to put something out there :(( also not proofread!
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BORING.
if you had to ask ( name ) what life as a celebrity is like the answer would be boring for the most part. sure, the concerts were fun and so were the fan meet and greets but the interviews, photoshoots and anything that didn't give her adrenaline was boring, in her opinion as least.
and this interview was no different than the others—
"so ( name ), recently there's been a photo of you and a member of a famous band walking downtown, would you like to talk about it?" the interviewer asked, as a picture of the girl and guitarist tom kaulitz from tokio hotel flashes on the screen.
— or maybe not
"scheiße! i knew that this was going to come up, so fucking annoying..."
" well, me and tom have been friends since we were small, our parents met eachother in highschool and became really good friends and so when me and the kaulitz twins were born we instantly became really good friends! it was just a friendly outing and nothing more!" smiled the girl, waiting for another question.
" you heard it here tom fangirls, your man is still single!" laughed the interviewer.
you'd think that after that interview the rumors would die, that people would get bored and suddenly forget about the picture, however that never happened. in fact, the press started questioning the guitarist as well.
" tom! tom! please look here! are the rumors true?"
"tom! are you and ( name ) dating?"
"can we expect a collab form you two in the future?"
truly a nightmare.
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" i don't want to be that person really, but i think you guys just need to come clean, i mean what's the worst that can happen?"
" great idea bill! let's see.. oh! i've got a few! the press will be on our ass nonstop, privacy will be GONE and let's not forget that our crazy fa girls will probably attack the living shit out of ( name )!"
" du spinnst wohl, tom. bill's right, we should just come clean i mean, we've been dating for two years now and i'm tired of having to be secretive and careful 24/7." sighed the girl, as she picked up another piece of hair to start braiding. " i mean sure you're right about the fan girl part but the rest is nothing that we haven't dealt with already. we'll be fine, trust me!"
" see! even ( name ) agrees with me! hör auf so depp zu sein, tom!"
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tonight was the night.
"hello everyone and welcome back! tonight we have ( name ) and tom kaulitz joining us!" presented the host. " so tom, ( name ) i think we both know why you guys are here tonight."
" i have a slight guess but i'll let you explain" smiled the girl before making eye contact with the guy next to her.
" perfect so as we all know there's been some rumors about you two recently after this photo right here was posted on the internet, anything to say about it?"
" uh yes actually, you see i was trying to enjoy a nice afternoon before my show with my beautiful girlfriend, away from paparazzi's eyes but it seems like i failed." replied tom as his iconic smirk appeared when he heard the live crowd gasp. " why is everyone so surprised? that's what couples do, no?"
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cottagecheese1 · 1 year
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Oh oh, what a platonic request where steve rogers meets his orphaned shy five years old grand grands Grand- niece, reader
Can you say Hello?
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Summary - Steve finally meets his grand niece you, but he didn't know you would be so little.
Warnings - Nothing, just fluff really and a little angst
Paring- Steve Rogers x child niece reader
Steve didn't have any more family. Well, not that he knew of, after he came out of the ice and as he continued living in the present day, he learned that all his family had passed on, and even most of the people he knew except Bucky.
So you can say he was pretty surprised when he got a call from an unknown number on his phone. Steve was contemplating picking up the unrecognized number, but what was the worst that could happen? That the person on the other line tries to get his credit card number? Yea, right.
Although he was pretty contempt with learning to live like that, he would still lay down in his bed at night and wonder what would have happened if he didn't take the serum and got to live his life so Steve could pass on with the rest of his family and friends.
Steve glanced at his screen one more time before hitting the green answer button. Holding the phone up to his ear, "Hello?" Steve waited patiently for someone on the other end to answer until a voice finally came up, "Hello? Is this Steve Rogers?".
Steve furrowed his eyebrows curiously, holding his phone tighter, becoming more engrossed in the conversation.
"Uh, yes, it is. Who is this?
He heard the voice on the other end give a relieved sigh.
"Thank God. I've been trying to get a hold of you forever. My name is Jessica Marfield. I am the owner of Mar's Orphanage"
That's weird. Steve wasn't looking to adopt any kids.
"Ma'am I think you're confused, I haven't called looking to adopt any kids."
Hearing a slight chuckle on the other side of the phone, he was also confused. Now he was just waiting for another response.
"No sir, we actually contacted you because we have a little girl who's about five that recently came in that seems to be your niece, and you’re the only known relative that's she has that's alive."
Steve paused, not for a second a long time. He couldn't believe it, but at the same time, Steve felt excitement and joy at the thought of a little girl that's related to him. Maybe he wasn't alone after all.
"Can I meet her? Well, I-I mean, could I schedule some time when I can meet her?"
"Oh yes, of course, Mr. Rogers, whatever time works for you. And of course, if you meet her and you would like to get guardian ship, we could go through that process also."
At this point, Steve was ecstatic. He quickly got up from his bed with a huge grin on his face. Holding the phone up to his ear again, he began to speak.
"Yes, um, how about tomorrow at 1:00?"
"Of course, Mr. Rogers, I'll put it right in my notes! She's a little shy, but I'm sure she will quickly warm up to you."
Steve quickly gave a quick 'thank you' and hung up the phone. He laid on his bed with the biggest grin on his face. After setting his alarm and finally getting ahold of his excitement, he was finally able to go to sleep.
---------------------Next day------------------------
When Steve woke up, he was probably the happiest he'd been in weeks, so when Steve went downstairs to get breakfast at the compound, everyone looked at him a little funny, considering he was unusually bubbly at this time in the morning.
Natasha eyed the blonde haired man suspiciously until she started speaking.
"Whats got you so happy, captain?"
Steve looked at her and tried not to smile, but the more he tried to suppress his grin, the wider his smile got.
"Well, I'm going to an orphanage and meeting my niece. And she's about five, so I guess I'm pretty excited. It's been a while since I had any family around, ya know?"
Natasha gave Steve a sympathetic smile and gave him a pat on the shoulder when she walked past him.
"Well, I'm happy for you, Steve. I think you'll both love each other"
Steve leaned against the counter, "I already do".
-----------------At the orphanage------------------
When Steve pulled into the Driveway and found a parked spot, he grabbed the white teddy bear from the backseat and took a deep breath. He looked up at the orphanage, and he was ready. But also very nervous.
Walking through the front doors confidentiality, he went up to the front desk and said he had an appointment to see you. The lady tapped on her keyboard and looked back up at him.
"Yea, you have a time scheduled to meet (y/n) at 1:00 correct?"
Steve didn't know her name, but he was pretty sure that was it, but even then, Steve knew she would have a beautiful name. The lady led Steve to a room filled with tons of little kids. Some of them were coloring, painting, playing dress up, and playing with a variation of different toys. It all just made him a little more excited at the wholesome sight.
"Wait, right here, Mr. Rogers, I'll have to get her quiet little self out of that corner she's always in."
Steves eyes followed the lady to the little girl who did look around five. He noticed she was coloring while sitting down in a princess chair, fidgeting with her fingers nervously as she glanced at me and back at the woman.
The little girl got up slowly and walked in front of the lady while she held her small shoulders softly. Once she made her way over to the door frame, where I was at, we all walked in the hallway. She stood silently, glancing at me once in a while.
"Can you say you say hello?"
She turned to the lady behind her once again and spoke.
"Is he my Daddy..."
I chuckled a little before the woman spoke up with a slight smile on her face.
"No, he isn't your daddy. I'm sorry, sweetheart, but he is your uncle. I'm sure you'll love him."
Steve gave a small frown at the sight, adverting her eyes down while she gave a soft 'oh' and played with her small fingers nervously. Steve knelt down to her level. He held out the white bear towards her while she stared at it.
"I got this for you. Do you like stuffies?"
He saw her give a small smile while nodding her head, looking up at him for reassurance that she was allowed to take the teddy bear.
"Go ahead, you can take it, angel, what's your name hun?
She took the white bear while giving a small thank you.
"y/n.." she said softly.
"That's a beautiful name, y/n, I'm Steve it's really nice to finally meet you"
The small girl giggled and hid her slightly red face with her hands. Steve couldn't help but pull her into a hug. He still couldn't believe how he actually still had family. Especially a little cutie like you.
Wrapping her little arms around, Steves neck and hugging as tight as she possibly could. Steve picked her up, rubbing circles on her back until he felt sniffles against his shoulder.
"Aw sweetie, why are you crying, baby?"
She looked up at him with puffy eyes and just gave him lots of "Tank you's." Steve cooed and wiped her puffy eyes. Until she spoke again.
"Cause you wan me"
Steve was positive his heart broke when she said that, moving her long hair out of her face, giving her a peck to her forehead.
"Aw, I love you so much, sweetie."
"Tank you, Stevie.."
The woman in front of me teared up but started to speak.
"Y/n, would you like to live with Stevie?" She quickly nodded her head but shortly rubbed her eyes tiredly while yawning.
The woman chuckled and walked over to me, "it's almost her nap time anyway, I'll go get the paperwork, and you guys stay here. Trust me, she'll out in a couple of minutes."
Steve laughed and gave a quick ok and felt the pressure of the small girls head on his shoulder, her face tucked into the crook of his neck. Well, I guess she would be out in a couple of minutes.
---------------------time skip-----------------------
Once Steve filled out the paperwork and got her stuff, some people came over to check if his living area and house were acceptable, he slowly picked the girl up and carried her to his bedroom where she would sleep until he could get her a bed.
When Steve laid her down softly and tucked the covers under her chin, laying the white teddy bear beside her, he bent down and gave her a quick peck on her forehead.
And at that moment, Steve knew everything at that point on would be ok.
A/n: This request was kinda cute, so I decided to finally finish something that was in my drafts.
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