Artist note: I’m so proud of this :))) I know it’s a lot of dialogue and reading, but dialogue is grueling work for me. I’m glad with the art and for the amount of pages I made in such a relatively short time span -w- page 5 was super fun to work on. A lot of blood, sweat, and hours here... :) The backgrounds were a big bore tbh, but I finished them! Yippie!
Bad is such such SUCH a good father but his self-sacrificial nature has definitely rubbed off on his children and it’s fascinating to see him struggle with that.
Bad, about Pomme being willing to die for Richarlyson: “I understand the sentiment because I would sacrifice myself for any of you. But you shouldn’t do it unless- Uh. It shouldn’t be something you rush into. (Reading Pomme’s sign) ‘Only when I have no choice’ … Okay… I’ll just make sure you never get the opportunity then.”
This is one of the most fascinating lines from q!Bad tonight in my opinion because you can literally hear him realize, in REAL TIME, how unhealthy his mindset is once it’s applied to anyone other than himself. He hears his own voice out of the mouths of his children and he hates it - but in trying to dissuade them, he stutters, because he still doesn’t think it’s wrong. He starts to tell Pomme “you shouldn’t do it unless-” and then cuts himself off because he doesn’t want Pomme to sacrifice herself at all, actually. Buuuuut he still believes self-sacrificial behavior is okay and so he can’t actually say “never sacrifice yourself.”
So instead he has to say “it shouldn’t be the first option” and Pomme replies with “only if I have no choice” which he clearly doesn’t like either but what can he say? ‘No, that’s wrong too’?
No. He can’t say that. Because if he’s teaching his kids that sacrificing themselves is never worth it and will hurt the people around them, then what does that mean for him?
So he just accepts it and settles for “Oh but I’ll make sure you never have to make that choice” which is obviously NOT the correct response to your child telling you they’re willing to die for any reason… but he can’t quite make himself say anything else, or he risks having to seriously re-evaluate the value of his own life. The flippant way in which he treats his health and safety in comparison to others has influenced his kids negatively, whether he likes it or not.
He deserved to scream and shout and rage because, holy shit, both of his kids have been missing for a month and he doesn't even know if they are alive.
He has been trying his absolute best to say calm, to stay afloat and to be dependable. But he's also falling apart when no one is looking.
He deserved to explode at the man (his own son?) who left a child in his care for months on end with no return date to speak of.
Wilbur spent 8 days with Tallulah.
Phil protected her, raised her, cared for her, held her as she cried, cherished every conversation and loved her as his own for 6 months.
That's his daughter, too.
That's his daughter.
((This is not to hate on cubito wilbur, from his pov and with the info available to him it makes sense to act as he does, but phil's side of this whole situation is just devastating. There is no good guy or bad guy here, it's just a family going through the unimaginable.))
the intense narrative foiling between the death of q!tubbo and the death of q!badboyhalo.
q!tubbo’s death felt like it happened so suddenly. many of those around him didn’t even believe it was real. one second he was playing around and then for a brief instant he begged for his life and then he was gone.
q!bbh’s death felt very slow. that he himself was stretching it out for as long as possible. there was time for him to prepare and for others to realize. to have the terrible feeling of grieving someone while they’re still alive.
and that’s not to say that q!tubbo’s death was random and out of nowhere because it wasn’t. similar to q!bbh, you could see his slow path to self destruction for months. but once again, those two were foils to one another.
q!tubbo was not one to hide it. the way he would say that he wouldn’t shower or change his clothes for brief periods of time. that he would willingly let himself get hurt without a care in the world. the thought that no one would take him seriously about things and he had said that thought out loud before. he spent his last moments gambling his own life away.
q!bbh would always try to hide it. although the evidence was clearly on his face and back, he would deny deny deny until those last final days. and even then it was only to those he trusted. he let himself get hurt by the soul vultures in his own home away from everyone else. he spent his last moments alone, panicking over old memories that still hurt him.
in the end, their commonality lays in that the kids were always the first ones to realize something was wrong. that they could see that the decline was slow but meaningful to them. the two soulhunters, bound together by fighting so fiercely to protect those who were not even their own, although it led to their deaths. the realm of the living waits for their returns and misses them in the shape of eggs
Happy Birthday to me! I am continuing my tradition of drawing Unit Bravo being pretty and looking ready for a ball <3 Close-up on the face is under the cut
Aged up Q! They’re late teens/early twenties here. One of these outfits is based off one described by @sunnysidesevenup in their fic “hearts in a different place” yeah remember when I said I’d draw more for this fic?
[A sad violin song plays over an image of a sad hamster]
Pac: This doesn't have anything to do with me – I wear a blue sweatshirt, you're crazy, this mouse doesn't even have a sweatshirt, this hamster! [Reading chat] Am I a depressed hamster?
[ Transcript continued ↓ ]*
–
Pac: Actually– that's fine! I embrace that idea – of course I'm going to be depressed, are you crazy? [He hits his desk, then starts counting off people on his fingers] Fit is gone, Richarlyson is gone, Ramon is gone, Bagi and Empanada who were always there when we were there are also gone, I haven't seen them! It's just me and Tubbo, and sometimes Philza shows up.
Pac: I lost Chume Labs, I lost the Favela, I lost Murder Mystery, I lost Ilha Chume Labs, it's crazy! Look at how much I've lost, and I've gained nothing! Of course I'm going to be depressed, are you crazy?! How am I supposed to be happy?!
Pac: [Reading chat] "You have us Pac," that's true, thank you. No, that's true, sorry.
* NOTE: Please note that this is an incomplete transcript, as I was primarily relying on Aypierre's translation mod at the time and if I am not confident of the translation, I do not include it. As always, please feel free to add on translations or message me corrections.
one complaint i do have is that ppl will sometimes comment on the fact that house never uses his cane on the proper side as if the show did it on accident when it's mentioned more than once that it's the wrong side, and people tell him this, and he knows it and still does it like that anyway . mostly because he's contrary and will go out of his way to try and prove that his way is better even when it's patently not, also at least partly because he's afraid of what would happen if he wasn't constantly suffering more than he needs to be, because that's the underpinning feature of his life and he doesn't know what he'd be without it. like the episode where he was in that parking space spat with the other doctor so to prove a point he went around using a wheelchair all week and is more or less pain free and clearly enjoying himself (to say nothing of his incredible smugness at having what he sees as extra disability points) but as SOON as the bet/point-proving is up he fucking . goes back to his regular life. with the cane that he knows he could use differently but doesn't and the back pain and the painkillers in excess of safe levels and the etc etc etc. king of learning zero lessons and preferring things to be worse because he doesn't know what to do with better!
friendly reminder that Neteyam is a well-adjusted kid who has a good relationship with his parents, that he tries his darnedest to be a good warrior because he genuinely looks up to his dad and wants to be like him, and that the idea that Jake and Neytiri are "forcing" him to be perfect, that they "stole his childhood" or that he's "not allowed" to be a kid, etc. are all pure fanfiction with little to no evidence in canon thanks bye