#*20k

[swissmissficrecs]

Word count: 35,040 Chapters: 4/4 Fandom: Sherlock (TV) Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson Characters: Sherlock Holmes, John Watson, Mycroft Holmes, Harry Watson (mentioned), Sherlock Holmes' Parents, Holmes Family - Character, Sebastian Wilkes Additional Tags: Fake/Pretend Relationship, accidental fake dating, Mistaken for Being in a Relationship, Oblivious Sherlock, Oblivious John, Friends to Lovers, Fluff, Christmas fic, holiday fluff, The tropes all the tropes, Sherlock's parents aren't nice, AU, Unilock, they're just done with Uni but still Unilock, different first meeting, various sex acts between consenting adults, Alcohol, mention of past drug use, mention of alcoholism, Christmas fake dating romcom, Seriously Sherlock's parents are the worst Summary:

Sherlock hates spending Christmas with his snobby parents. John has nowhere to go over the holidays. The heat in 221B is broken and their fridge is empty. Plus, Sherlock's parents will hate John. So of course Sherlock takes John along. It's not his fault that his parents assume John's his boyfriend. Of course John is perfect and all, but Sherlock doesn't do romance. So what harm can there be in pretending, if it makes his parents this mad?

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Rec: Christmas in April? Yes, please! Completely charming with a smidge of angst, this reminds me of classic pre-S2 “meet the Holmes family” fics with a supporting cast of eccentric broadstroke characters, an old family pile, and only one bed.

In this AU setup, Sherlock is just out of uni and running a fledgling consulting detective business, while John - his former dormmate and now flatmate - is a medical student. The Holmes parents are upper-class snobs with a long list of reasons to disapprove of Sherlock, although there may be an ally or two (or 3) amongst the extended family. 

Playful quips, jabs, and snark trade off with more serious confrontations of classism and homophobia, all the while Sherlock and John come to the slow-but-sudden realization that what they are playacting may not be a game after all. You won’t regret returning to the chill and gloom of winter with these two fakers to cheer on.

[charlesoberonn]

It's gonna be such a funny mess when Donald Trump dies of a stroke on April 1st, 2024.

Naturally everybody will think it's fake because of the date only to lose their minds (both positively and negatively based on their opinion of trump) when realizing it's real

There will be massive celebrations in the streets and on social media and lots of predictable "don't speak ill of the dead" discourse about those celebrations

Weird evangelicals will pull some weird number trick talking about how Jesus was conceived on April 1st and that makes Trump a sort of messiah and people will make fun of that

The Republicans (after they're done with the faux-sadness and faux-outrage) will stomp over each other to be his successor but none of them will succeed. They'll tear each other apart and have no single nominee for the November elections.

There will be discourse about if Biden and the living former presidents should go to his funeral (they won't, he was a traitor insurrectionist)

The Ukraine-Russia War immediately goes in favor of Ukraine as morale in the Kremlin is reduced. China similarly backs off from its threats on Taiwan.

Ten thousand new memes are made, some sticking around for years to come.

Not a month later a bunch of unofficial biographies of Trump hit the bookshelves, many with new details about just how awful he was.

[phosphorus-noodles]

Reblog to let your followers know that they’re safe from jumpscares/screamers/etc from you on April 1st but they are NOT safe from getting boop’d like an idiot amen

[53v3nfrn5]

Tree roots following the pattern of concrete footpaths

[corpish]

in recognition of World Down Syndrome Day on March 21

[toothwormfactory]

[fleshdyke]

you cant fucking hurt me bitch im protected by the migratory bird act

[oceanfossil]

2024

DO IT SCARED

FUCK IT WE BALL

REMEMBER THAT PEOPLE CARE ABOUT YOU

MAKE THE CHOICE TO END HARMFUL PATTERNS

LOVE WITH YOUR WHOLE HEART

[erros429]

roommate texted this to me……..

[maythray]

"the three dots on the side" call her by her REAL NAME.. Meatballs Menu

[brennan-lee-mother]

Diversity win! Ancestral curse recognises non-biological parenthood!

[charlesoberonn]

[ikimaru]

I just came across the steven meme and had to do it 🏃‍♀️

[og comic]

[gavamont]

Not my white ass locked in the duke’s dungeon again because I fucked his favorite jester 😩

I didn’t know he was so territorial over the silly little guy 🙄

[disableddyke]

[holyvirgilscriptures]

you've stripped him of so many of his qualities that it's no longer "he would not say that". it's "who the fuck even is that guy"