#...i need to go make something with my matcha and calm down.

[jfkisonthemoon]

i want to be living in japan again.................

[angelicgirlmj]

an angels guide: sunday reset routine

hi angels! at the end of a busy and long week you need to prioritise taking care of yourself, your mental health and your space. i like to save sundays to be a ‘me’ day, a day where i indulge in self care, cleaning and preparing myself peacefully for a busy week ahead. resetting your space and self can be an intensive routine (think thirty minute youtube videos of someone deep cleaning their house) or just simple and short (having an early night). this is my more aspirational reset routine, on an ideal sunday i will do all of this but some days i may negotiate and do a little less. hopefully this post inspires you to take care of yourself and your space.

space ˚₊‧꒰ა ꣑ৎ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

open your windows, let air circulate.

wash bedding, pillowcases, towels and any face cloths.

light candles or incense to make your space smell good.

polish any mirrors and windows.

declutter surfaces or desks (put everything away and back into its place).

fold clothes and ensure wardrobe/drawers/clothes storage spaces are tidy.

wipe down surfaces.

clean any hair brushes, makeup brushes etc.

throw away any rubbish from bins or around you.

plan meals for the week ahead. look at what is in your fridge or cupboards and clear anything expired.

play calming playlist or playlist themed around the atmosphere you want to create in your space.

water any plants.

get new flowers/rid of old flowers.

plump any pillows, refold blankets and make your space cozy and safe feeling.

body ˚₊‧꒰ა ꣑ৎ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

apply hair oils + hair mask and leave to soak in for the day.

do yoga/stretching in the morning.

drink a glass of water first thing.

eat nutritious meals that will allow your body to feel good.

go on a walk or exercise.

have bath/shower.

do full body exfoliation - scrub off dirt and grime from past week.

shave (if you shave your body hair).

apply deep, cleansing body washes and give self a massage of sorts.

drink tea/matcha.

clean teeth, floss, mouthwash and oil pull twice.

apply body oils, body lotions/creams.

finish day doing light stretching/yoga.

face ˚₊‧꒰ა ꣑ৎ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

do full am and pm skincare routines.

ice face.

do gua sha routine.

apply a face mask.

tweeze/tidy eyebrows if that is a preference.

use a lip scrub or exfoliator.

gently facially exfoliate.

give self brief facial massage.

apply any spot treatments or specialised skincare.

mind ˚₊‧꒰ა ꣑ৎ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

meditate in the morning.

journal and plan week ahead.

read at least one chapter of a book.

watch a comforting/relaxing show.

ensure all school work or anything similar is complete or at a point where it needs to be.

do something for yourself (paint your nails, colour, make something, bake etc).

plan ways to stay on top of any goals set.

set weekly goals and targets.

have an early night.

be off devices by eight if possible.

spend time with a family member or friend.

spend some time outdoors.

drink plenty of water.

thank you for reading angels! i hope this post is helpful and you have a relaxing and productive sunday. all my love, m.

[cottonlemonade]

hi!! I'm gonna take menu b with strawberry and matcha roll and im gonna sit next to tsuki!😊 thank you!!(⁠｡⁠･⁠ω⁠･⁠｡⁠)⁠ﾉ⁠♡

Don’t Call Me That

request: fluffy, jealous crush Tsukki, as manager

Kei set up the net, caught in a conversation he wished he hadn’t started. Hinata was going on and on and on about a new technique he was dying to try, while Yamaguchi thankfully indulged him and asked questions, leaving Kei the opportunity to throw glances at the entrance of the gym.

Originally, he had meant to wait close to the door, just in case you needed help carrying something. He wouldn’t have offered his help readily, of course, but you were usually quick to ask one of the team members to jump in when things got too difficult to balance.

To be honest, he didn’t even know why he bothered. Sure, your smile made him think of a sunrise over a field of wildflowers in late summer - but god, you were annoying. Always bright, always prepared to build up the team with an inspirational speech that rivaled Takeda sensei, always eager to support wherever you could, as if this wasn’t just a stupid club.

The other first years started following you around like puppies after their initial introduction, while Nishinoya and Tanaka were extra protective of their fellow second year. You finally arrived, closely followed by Ennoshita and Narita. For quite some time now, Kei had tried to figure out if Narita was maybe more than a friend to you, but you were probably just being nice, right? He was too bland for you. But an image began building in his mind of the other middle blocker pulling you into an empty classroom, one hand on your plump hip, the other cupping your chubby cheek, leaning down to-

“Tsukki, are you there? You gotta pull the string to-“

“Don‘t call me that!“, Kei snapped at the idiot tangerine, but did as he was told, “How many times do I have to tell you I hate that nickname!“

“Geez, fine, calm down - Suckyshima.“, Hinata mumbled and ran away screaming a second later when Kei threw him a murderous glare.

A moment later the team was called to assemble for a pre-practice pep talk from the coach and Kei was actually much more interested in the way you played with your necklace than paying any attention. For a split second he wondered if it might have been a gift from a boyfriend, Narita or otherwise and his already sour mood turned even darker.

“So, that‘s our goal for today. Tsukishima and Hinata, are you ready to try this block?“, the coach asked and Kei did a double take upon being spoken to directly. Even though he had no idea what had been discussed, he nodded and turned to get started on the warm up when you said, “Good luck, Shoyo-kun! You too, Tsukki-kun!“

Kei froze for a second, then continued walking, feeling his legs beginning to wobble slightly.

“Hey, she called you “Tsukki”, Tsukki.“, Hinata said, catching up to him and bouncing along.

“Sharp as ever.“, Kei muttered.

“Why isn‘t she getting yelled at? You said you were going to make sure my bloodline ends with me if I called you “Tsukki“ again! Why isn‘t she getting threatened!? Hm? Tsukkiiii~“

a/n: Tsukki going for a girl older than him - scandalous! Thank you so much for the request 🌟 I hope you enjoyed it!

[thebottomfromhell]

Can i request uppermoons x GN reader baking with them for the first time? (fluff)

A very cute prompt! I will be using mostly Japanese desserts for this, I hope you don't mind. Also, some will be more fond with the kitchen than others, specially since none of these guys can eat human food. Still, I hope you like it.

Uppermons baking with GN Human Reader for the first time

Warnings: Manga spoilers, Implied child prostitution, Sexism, Implied polyamory relationship (the clones) and Douma is his own warning.

Gyutaro (ft. Daki):

Daki was a lot more enthousiastic with the idea than him, she already knows slightly about cooking, mostly because she needs to know about food when she recomends meals to clients, since she herself can't know what is good based on taste. Gyutaro is straight up ignorant with these things, he can't even recall having anything sweet or savoury in his human life, only the ghost of rice and the taste of rawness. He let's you and Daki decide what to do. "Let's do sakura mochi and matcha mochi!" He chothose oflavor due the color, but you are more than ok. In the end he is just making the Sakura pouder as you and Daki make the dough.

Still, he seems content by just looking at you both make fun, making most of it as you mix the cream with the respective powder to make the filling. Once the doughs and filling are done, it's you and Daki the ones that make the balls as Gyutaro starts cleaning everything after you both. "Are you sure you don't want to help us the the mochi? It's fun to get yout hands dirty with it." You offer but are denied. "Ne, I prefer cleaning up your mess. Not sure you would want my hands in something you will eat, ne." "Nah, I'm pretty sure your hands are safe." Daki lets a happy squeak as she finidhes her part, having a group of pink mochi, still giggling as she has been the whole process. "Onii-chan! Look! Don't they look good?"

And as Gyutaro has been the whole time, he smiles softly to both of you as he pats you haid and Daki's. "They look great, ne. Both of you are really talented. Y/N, ne, you might want to see how they taste. It would be a waste to throw them, ne." You smile cheekly before teasing. "How about you feed me, then?" He blushes and looks as if he wants to say something while looking away, but Daki interrupts. "NO! You can eat by your own! Onii-chan doesn't have to feed you as if you were a child!" She scolds you while going to grab her brothers arm, looking at you as a challenge. You only laught it off, seeing Gyutaro smile shyly before calming his sister down.

The mochi taste good, as sweat as the experience, but you made too much for yourself and the other too can't eat (Also the fact the texture is a bit off because you all were a bit careless with the measurements). But Gyutaro is right, it would be a waste to not eat them... If your tummy hurts after eating them all, it's a you problem.

Gyokko:

Gyokko is not into cooking, he admires culinary arts, but that is not for him. It took him some begging, a bit of annoying the shit out of him and A LOT of praising for him to accept. First thing Gyokko does is look at the recipe of taiyaki (it was one of his conditions to make it with you, so you were forced to get the fish mold) and then.. throws it away. "Ok, I got it. Now let's cook." He mostly makes you into an assistant, making you get the ingredients. "Don't worry darling, I will let you fry it, but I already lave the perfect image for this." He adds and mixes the ingredients mostly by instinct, and bieng fully aware you are the one who is going to be eating that, you fear for your life.

"Hey, Gyokko, love... are you sure you don't want me to get the cooking book again? I don't think those are the measurements we were instructed..." Gyokko only scoff as he keeps mixing the ingredients. "Of course not. How could a book know more that the wise eyes of an artist?" Yep, he is too much into himself, but... these are just pancakes ingredients, as long as you cook it well, it should not be harmful to you. After he finishes, Gyokko hands you the mix, it looks good, a nice color and texture, very clean, and he kisses the side of your face. "There you go."

Gyokko only looks at you as you pour the mix and the red bean paste into the oiled mold before you close it and heat it, unlike him, you make sure the fire and the time is the same as the book, keeping it a few seconds more, but no more than a minute, to make sure it cooks well. Once the time is up you open the mold to see the fish shape perfectly gold and toasted, and the smell was nice too. You decide to have a little bit more faith because of it, so you keep making more to use up all the mix while the frist one cools down. Still, Gyokko looks amused of how you keep turning to see the fish-shaped pancakes.

Then the moment of truth, the fear comes back the secong you take one taiyaki into your mouth, only to be surprised with a fluffy texture with the sweatness. It's... actually very good. "Gyokko... HOW?" He only laughs at your surprise. "Well, of course I would know, the eye of an artist is the best." You are torn into making cook more since he has a natural talent ot tell him to never do it again for the sake of not feeding his ego. Damned Gyokko, you think as you keep eating.

Hantengu:

To your surprise, Hantengu knows how to cook, so he happily complied into making some melonpan. He seemed to ignore you through the whole process, relaxing as he mixes the ingredients in a bowl without even looking at the recipe. He claims he holds some memories of cooking for the wives and children he had when he was human, nothing precise, but it's still there, like a muscle memory that has not left him fully, the same of the memory of hiding, of covering his face instinctly, a twitch in his hand meant for stabbing. He was old when he became a demon, unlike all the other Uppermoons, who did not live even half of the time he did as human, even the master was pretty young when he became the first demon. Unlike others, he managed to form habits as a human, and those habits would never die.

"You need to add more butter." You add yourself whenever the book says he is doing something wrong, not wanting to disturb the peace, enjoying the comforting silence. Usually, Hantengu´s frantic breathing, whines and even sobs don't let you enjoy time in silence with him, unless you are feeling sadistic and want to bully him, but this is relaxing. You also have your own bowl where you are making dough, mostly switching in between following the instructions on the book and following his lead. "Oh... right, tha-thank you..."

Besides that some corrections, you don't really talk to each other, but you are fine, making sure to make a lot since you are planning on sharing with friends and family, Hantengu shows no qualms on it. He can get jealous pretty easily, but he doesn't mind sharing as long as he has in in his reach (he will get insecure no matter what, so why make it hard for you and make you want to leave?). "Here hold it like this so you can cut it more easily." Is the only thing he says to you after you have the forms made, making the last details. He holds your wrists gently to guide the movements, being stables in contrast of the usual tremblings. Maybe, if it was not for his past and impulses, he would be better made for a simple life, a fake ilusion of safety.

You don't mind the new silence as the dough bake, but normalcy returns the second the bread is out of the oven. You take a bite to try it once the baked goods cool down, it has a nice texture, soft on the insides but with a slight crinch on top. You need to do it again, you think as you start hearing the whines and pants on the corner.

Hantengu Clones:

These guys are a disaster. For starters, Urogi got protective on the eggs, so you had to look for a recipe that didn't include them. So you are doing a sponge cheesecake, or well. Aizetsu is making a sponge cheesecake, following the recipe step by step, making sure the measurements and the order is correct, since he can't taste the mix to know if it's good or not with his demon tongue. Meanwhile Urogi is... taking care of the eggs, Sekido is supervising and complaining for everything that gets dirty in the process and Karaku is distracting you from getting your eggs back.

"C'mon love, you look so cute while making cake, but why don't you... relax a while. Urogi is not changing his mind and if you keep trying so hard you will get an ugly and unfixable frown in your face like Sekido." You want to complain, Urogi is perfectly fine with you eating chicken and any other type of meat, but the second you try to make something with eggs, that mind you are not that cheap to keep buying, he draws a line. Still, Sekido's growling voice rises up first. "THE FUCK YOU SAID ABOUT MY FACE, KARAKU?!" The anger clone goes directly to the pleasure, ready to start a fight in the kitchen, so the situation morphes into you trying to calm them down before they destroy the place with Urogi chanting "Fight! Fight! Fight! I bet a human leg on Sekido!"

""Mix vigorously until well combined", again? Why can I add all this ingredients at once instead of having to alternate?" Meanwhile Aizetsu is just ignoring you all for the sake of baking, fully concentrating on it. Which is good, at least some baking will be done with all the shenanigans going around. "Sekido, don't use the staff in my kitchen! NOT IN MY KITCHEN!" "You heard Y/N! Not in the kitchen! You wouldn't want to make a mess, would you?" "I'm gonna kill you, you bastard!" "Aren't we technically all from the same parents?" "SHUT THE FUCK UP, UROGI!" "SEKIDO, NO! HE STILL HAS MY EGGS!" "Put slowly the mix into a greased mold with a parchment paper..." Aizetsu knows batter than to care.

At least until the mixture goes to the ove, then he turns around and see you and Karaku holding Sekido, the secong bloodied from an attack the anger clone did on him, with Urogi laughings his ass off as he hold all your eges in his arms, threatening to fly as the wings would make a bigger mess. "Excuse, what is going on?" You all turn around and see him surprised, suddenly stopping as if you all had just being caught doing something wrong as those confused puppy eyes look at you all. "No, nothing Aizetsu. We should just start baking." Then he points up to the oven. "Actually, I already did everything. It should be done in 45 minutes." You look surprised, making you look around as Urogi congratulates Aizetsu, Karaku laughs and Sekido scoffs. "How?"

You are to one who tries the cake, obviously. It's perfectly done, step by step, so it's good, a bit less fluffy than you expected it to be by it's looks, but still good. "Sorry we left you doing all the work, Aizetsu." He shrugs. "I don't mind, it was relaxing. I could do it again."

Nakime:

Nakime always hated to do the chores, it was one of the she was the happiest when she became a demon with a power like hers. The castles sustainst itself, everything can be reformed, replaced, transformed and created, as long as she has her biwa and enough space in this unlimited ientnteional world. She didn't have to take care of a useless man that expected her to have the house clean and food on the table with the little money she made and he wasted like the air and space he took. She never thought she would ever step into a kitchen again, but of course...

"C'mon Nakime, pleeeeaase?" She hates you, how did you even manage to convince her? You are stubborn as hell. In the end she agrred to supervise and help (if you needed it) to the cooking... of a moon cake. You just wanted to make a moon cake and didn't know how to start, didn't you? In the end you manage to concince her to make the lotus paste, but she just watches as you do the dough and put the egg yolk inside of it, she guiding you through the process everytime you get lost on the recipe, she keeping the reading. The meal looks intimidating, but it's not so hard to make if instructed.

She doesn't speak through the whole process, but you keep smiling at her, grateful that she is here. "Now you only need to put it on the oven." Nakime uses her biwa to give you an pre-heated oven... sometimes you wish you could have her powers. In the wait, Nakime plays for you, it was not as bad as she remembered it, still she would never go back into cooking, specially now that she can't eat. Still, spending time with you made it a bit worth it, not that she will let you do this more often, her days as a housewife were long gone even before she became a demon.

"Is it good?" Nakime asks the second you give it a try, seeing how happy the first bite made you, she knew it was, but still was amused so she decided to ask, only for you to vocalize it. "It's very good!" That is good enough.

Akaza:

Akaza was unsure at first, a part of him felt like being in the kitchen was natural, since he inmediately knew how to get the ingredients for a sweet, getting the eggs for a datemaki. Even if the kitchen of a Taisho era was slightly different, he got into it too easily, but also... "Why are you making sweet rolled omelette?" You asked him when you realized he was set on doing it, not even needing to look at the recipe book. You know it's a sweet form the Edo period, when Akaza was human, but the fact that. he went straight to make it still felt odd. "You like it, don't you? I made it several tim-" He stops in his tracks, pausing a moment before just concentrating in cooking.

He let you help and guided you through the making of the mixture, showing you hoe he makes it. He pours a lot of care into it, knowing by muscle memory how much to add of everything, moving smoothly as he let's you handle it for whiles before taking the lead once again, making sure to praise you constantly. "Yes, just like that. I will pre-heat the oven. I know you can handle it for a bit, you are doing great." He is gentle and soft, looking a bit... sad. He can't remember, but he used to make these for Koyuki while she was sick, having to learn from scratch as Keizo didn't know how to cook but the girl told him her mother used to make them for her. It's important to make them right, for her to feel home the same way he did around her, he wants you to feel home, to feel your own life, when you try it.

He still praises you, carresing your face softly as you both wait for it to heat up, gently urging you to seat down, setting the table in front of you as he moves back and forward to check that it hasn't burnt. He treats you like this sometimes, as if you needed to be taken care of, and even like this he doesn't stop. Still, you can see that, even if he is worried, nostalgic and melancholic... he smiles towards you, happy to be sharing this. Koyuki also came to help him to the kitchen once she felt better, he taught her how to cook, this meal included, but the first times it was too much effort to her and the heat of the oven made her head hurt, so Hakuji always made sure for her to rest with some tea while he finished cooking. "Here, have some tea. Relax."

He serves you a healthy amount, not too much, not too little, and gently reminds you he can serve you more if you want but you also don't have to eat it all if you can't. The brownish colour of the outside contrast slightly the yellow of the thes of the roll, you take a bite and... it's delicious. There is something of it that, while the texture and taste can't make it the best thing you have ever ate, could still become your favorite. It's comforting, warm, peaceful. You look at Akaza, who smiles softly at you when you also smile. "I love it! You are a very good cook." He laughs a little, clearly happy. "You think so? Maybe I should start cooking for you, then." He teases, and you both wish you could stay like this forever.

Douma:

As you might have guessed, this is the first time Douma has ever stepped into a kitchen in his long, long life. "Oh! So this is how the kitchen look. I always thought they would be more messy!" His follower try urging him to get back to his room, to the gardens, to the corriders, anywhere but the kitchen. Some even look at you as if you insulted their family name and every grave that shares it, because none of them liked the idea of Douma cooking. To some it was because of Douma's status, why should he cook when people should be serving him and filling his basic needs? To have the god's messenger doing the maid's job, what an insult! Others... well...

Other knew Douma's true character, that he would definetely set something on fire only for the sake of it. You knew that, so you decided to just try and make yokan, since it doesn't requiere cooking. At that, the rest of the followers calmed down and gave up on taking the "Great Founder" out. What could they do against his wishes? Some stayed in case anything happens. Nothing wrong at first, deiding to go for a sweet potato flavor for some and matche yonkos for the other. The kitchen had already everything you needed to make those sweets, most kids of the followers enjoy it. Douma remembers Kotoha asking for the types of foods her son would be allowed to eat, and he promised anything he wanted. For you, he had the same reaction.

It was a simple recipe, the kenten did most of it, if not all. Everything else was watching out for the temperature of the water and mix it until it fuses. Very easy, and int Douma's mind, very boring. Maybe you should have seen it coming, staying safe was never part of his main interests, not when basically nothing can really hurt him. Physical pain? With how fast it heals it's barely a sting to keep the adrenaline and endorphins running. Emotional pain? Never heard of it. Mental pain? Why? He is above any type of problem both demons and humans could have. So exploding the kitchen on purpose the second you got up to speak to another follower because of the insistence that you were violating the cooking shift... was a must.

"DOUMA WHAT THE FUCK?!" You screamed on top of your lungs as his wounds healed, having him laughing it off carelessly, clearly amused by your reacting as every cell is replaced with a new and yourger one from the master's blood. "Oops, guess this things happen when you don't know what you are doing. So sorry about it, I swear it was an accident." What a liar. Needless to say, nobody got any yokan at all.

Kokushibou:

... Kokushibou doesn't cook, doesn't bake, that was his wife's and the maid's job, once it was his mother's and, again, the maid's job, not his. Desserts are included in this, his wife used to make him sweets at the first year of their marriage, but he constantly rejected them so she stopped. He was never into sweets, never ate them since anytime he was given one he wuold give it to his brother, even if that gained a scolding or a beating, so he never developed a taste for them. So the second you asked him to bake something with you his answer was a long stare before leaving you alone, speeding up when you went after him.

Really, you only managed to get him to stay in the kitchen while you made Dorayaki, something simple and traditional, By his point of view, staying didn't really make sense to Kokushibou. He doesn't know how to cook, it's not interested in doing the "woman's job in the house" and he can't even taste anything you make, not that he would if he could, but still. Part of him is tempted to leave now that your attention is not on him, but he just... stays, looking at you. You seem content doing this, and he can't really understand why. How can you be contenct with something so simple while all his life he was chasing a figure that was as godly as it was close from the womb? How can you be satisfied doing these kind of things when others have powers beyond a human should have, being in the blood or lungs?

He just looks at you, the silence being comforting and peaceful, almost like meditating as he looks at you mixing the ingredients, humming a bit sometimes only to focus again on your task. This is so... other, for him. He has never belonged to the kitchen and never planned to, so he couldn't understand anything. Specially why do you find his presence peaceful and comforting too. You only start frying the pancakes the second you talk to Kokushibou again. "Maybe next time you can join in." You tease before looking at him with a smirk. He si definetely not falling for it, so you just finish and serve yourself.

The pancakes were fine, as good as anything you can make, nothing bad but also nothing beyond your abilities. Still, Kokushibou's next words made the dish even sweeter. "I will clean, you enjoy the meal." He knows more or leass how to do it, and he doesn't think it can be that hard. Even if this is the only way he is filling to interact with the activity, you are happy he is willing to get outside his comfort zone for your sake. "Thank you, Kokushibou. I appreciate it." He blushes slightly, nods, cleans the kitchen and leaves the house without saying anything the second the sun is down... now, if only he wasn't so shy and petty...

[deathofpeaceofmiiind]

illicit affairs | twenty one

*Ellie’s POV* two months later The last two months have been an absolute whirlwind, it was hard to believe it was already August. Noah moved in with me but he’s only been here half the time since he’s been back and forth from LA for work and doing a few festival shows. When he was here though we spent most of the time exploring around Vancouver and getting Noah familiar with what the city had to offer. It still didn’t feel real that was he was permanently here, I kept waiting for him to go home to LA .

One of the best things about Noah being here was him spending time with Liam and developing a bond with him. Liam loved having Noah around which was such a relief because I was worried he wouldn’t like sharing our space. Noah spent a lot of undivided time with him and his calm, patient, kind nature helped him gained Liams trust pretty quickly. He even introduced Liam to Naruto and now it was their favourite pastimes. I also tried to not get offended when Liam started wanting Noah to read him a bedtime story and tuck him in, but their bond was so special I let it go. “Ow.” I turned around and saw Noah holding his shoulder, making me sigh. As much as I loved that Noah brought some of his music equipment with him, our living room was getting a little crowded. We had my desk, some guitars and Liams toy shelf in here, along with a sectional the size of Texas. I turned my attention back to my computer so I could wrap up some emails for work. Seconds later Noah came over and gently rubbed my shoulders, making me lose my train of thought. “I’m almost done.” I breathed as he brought his lips to the back of my neck. “Okay, I want to talk to you about something important when you’re done.” I raised my eyebrow at him, “I can type and listen.” “No you finish, I’ll make us some coffee first.” He whispered before kissing the top of my head. My head tingled from the contact as he walked towards the kitchen. Noah’s love language has been making me coffee when he’s here, which I’d never complain about because he always made it perfectly. He set up a full coffee bar when he moved in, making me anything from matcha’s, flat whites to iced oat milk lattes. When Liam was having a sleepless night he would even steam milk and honey for him to sleep, which worked like an absolute charm. “So what did you want to talk about?” I asked as I sat down on the couch. Noah came around the corner, a hot coffee in hand for me. I smiled as he passed it to me, feeling the warmth against my hands.

“While I appreciate all of us cramming into this condo together, we need more space. Jolly and I have been toying with the idea of a deluxe album so I’ll need a recording studio sooner than later.” He fiddled with the strings on his hoodie, looking nervous as all hell as he looked at me. “I had some places lined up to look at this afternoon if you’re interested.” “Seriously?” “Yes Ellie.” He smirked, “you can’t tell me it doesn’t feel crowded. I know Liam is only here half the time, but it would be nice to give him more space to play too. Not that I don’t trust him, but some of these guitars are really expensive so I need them somewhere safe.” “No I get it, and it would be nice to actually have an office.” My tone changed, getting excited about the idea, “so when do we go?” Noah just smiled at me before finished up our coffees. He had picked six houses that were in this area to look at because he liked it here, and I did too. After quickly getting dressed we got into the car and drove about 10 minutes away from the condo to a small bungalow that was almost identical to his home in LA. My stomach dropped a little, I didn’t want to be reminded of what happened there. Our realtor showed us around but I could tell even Noah didn’t like it, he took one loop around the kitchen and said we weren’t interested. 

The next few houses didn't impress us and neither of us could see ourselves building a future in them. I started to wonder if we needed to hire a new realtor because he wasn’t getting it. Noah wore his defeat on his face and I tried to remain positive for him but it was hard. I grabbed his hand and gave him a reassuring squeeze as we pulled up to the next house, which was also the last one. “Holy shit.” My jaw dropped as we pulled into the driveway. It was a two story modern home but with much darker aesthetics. Once we got out of the car I noticed and it had the cutest front porch, and it was on a quiet cul-de-sac. I was already picturing Liam riding a bike around here in the summer. Noah’s eyes glowed as he looked over at me, this could be it. Noah and I were walking around the house in complete awe, every room was leaving us speechless. We found out it was just built this year, so no one had lived in it yet. The interior matched with the exteriors aesthetics with the doors, window frames, all the cabinets and lights being black with gold fixtures. The floors were a lighter wood finish and the walls were a soft white and the house had so much natural lighting. It had 5 bedrooms, which was good because Liam can have his own room and we could have guest rooms for when the guys come up. There was also a small office off of the living room that would be perfect for me, or for Noah to turn into a recording studio. This house was meant for us.

“I saved this for last, because I think you’ll love the backyard the most.” We both gasped as we headed outside, my hand squeezed Noah's harder as I looked around. There was a large patio with a fire pit, again, perfect for us when the guys come up and a decent sized yard with a small in ground pool. My eyes wondered over to a detached garage that had a bonus room above it. Noah’s eyes lit up and I could instantly tell he wanted to make it his recording studio. Seeing him like this made my heart melt. Unfortunately our excitement wore off when we saw the price, it was a bit out of Noah’s price range. Unfortunately Vancouver real estate was, if not worse than LA’s was. Our realtor assured us he could get the asking price down since it had been on the market for a while and would get back to us with a better number by tomorrow. We felt our dream home slipping out of our hands and it was crushing me to see Noah so distraught over it. We thanked the realtor and drove home in complete silence.

“What if I sold my condo?” “Are you sure?” Noah sighed, not taking his eyes off the road.

"This house was made for us babe. My condo has doubled since I bought it and I paid it off, so it would help us with a downpayment. We can make this happen."

Noah put the car in the park as we pulled up the condo, sighing heavily. My eyes pleaded for him to give in for once and let me help, considering this was something for us. He brought his hand up to my face and held my cheek in his palm. I studied the freckles on his sun kissed face as he tried to find his words. “That house really was made for us, wasn’t it?” I just nodded on account I was melting into his hand. A small smirk appeared on his face before he gently kissed me, leaving me wanting more. The pad of his thumb gently rubbed my bottom lip as a million thoughts raced through my mind. Our eyes remained locked on each other and that gravitational pull made it impossible to look away. “Lets go get our home then.”

[gymleadergarnet]

My Introduction Post!!!

Hello, everyone! I'm Garnet Skyesor, 21 years old, and my dream is to become a Gym Leader in my home region of Hoenn! I'm . . . not entirely sure how to GET there yet, but I'm doing my best to figure it out!

Back when I was 13, I did the Gym Challenge here in Hoenn, and actually got all the badges! I never ended up going to the league, though . . . it just didn't work out. But I made a lot of friends along the way, who've stayed with me all these years!

My squad is:

Skipper the Swampert, my awesome starter. He's a pretty calm guy, but helped carry me hard.

Endeavor the Gardevoir, the absolute QUEEN. She will not hesitate to mess you up if you mess with my guys.

Linear the Linoone, I originally named him Ziz but then realized "wait that's kinda stupid" and he agreed so we changed it. He's pretty good at helping me navigate out in the wild!

Quartz the Sableye, she's a bit odd but pretty fun. I didn't use her much during the Gym Challenge, but she was still pretty helpful!

Tory the Torkoal and Elec the Manectric--these two are actually parents to the wonderful Tory Jr, also a Torkoal! Tory is a fairly calm and wise mother, while Elec is a fun-loving energetic father. Tory Jr is fairly stubborn but sweet, and likes to follow me around.

Grassel the Wynaut, named after my old Math Teacher. He (my teacher) really liked making puns, so I named this silly little lad in his honor.

Amy the Skarmory, my super-fast flyer and a pretty dependable messenger! She's pretty sharp, like her feathers, but also really silly.

Minos the (SHINY!) Tauros, who I found on a short trip to Kanto about a year after my gym run. He's surprisingly silly for a Tauros, but we all enjoy his company, and he likes to help give me rides when I need it.

Matcha the Sinistcha, a newcomer to the team who I adopted from @ghost-pokemon-appreciator. She's a lot of fun so far, and she sounds pretty interested in joining my Gym Team! I'm still getting to know her, though.

Neutron the Mimikyu, a little guy received from mystery gift via @ask-games-galore! He is adorable and I love him and he's dressed as a Plusle/Minun and he's so CUTE AAAAAAA!!!

Elise the Froslass, a very fine lady adopted from @the-daycare-pokecenter! She's very charming, and seems very excited to battle on my team.

They're all silly guys, but I love them, and they all seem willing to help me figure out how to reach this dream of mine!

Out of Character:

Hello, everyone! Welcome to "Lily's friend Finn discovered and decided to join rotomblr so she followed suit", as well as "Lily decides to actually use her first playthrough of emerald for something".

My main is @boom-fanfic-a-latta, follows and likes will be from there.

(This is now my second time going down a tumblr roleplay rabbit hole, let's see if I end up accidentally creating a discord community out of it this time as well . . . update, I have at the very least created a circle of friends on discord via rotomblr, I'm pretty sure that counts!)

Please keep things SFW--while I'm not a minor, I'm still very averse to anything NSFW, and there ARE minor who interact with this blog.

Pelipper Mail and Mystery Gifts are ON!

[fangirlandtheories]

I have worked at Starbucks for over 2 years now and I make the chalkboard signs for my store. While searching for inspiration on Pinterest, I discovered that someone made a Stranger Things chalkboard designating different drinks to different characters. While the artwork was great, the drinks just didn't match according to my opinion so I wanted to make my own. Without further ado, a baristas guide to Stranger Things drinks:

- Steve Harrington: We're starting off with one of the more simple to order drinks. There's no mods or alternatives, just a pure, sweet drink. Steve is a Caramel Ribbon Crunch. He's layered and multifaceted the same way the drink has separate layers. He's sweet, sometimes too sweet for his own good, but he's cool as ice. Served drizzled and well topped (if you know what I mean 😉)

-Eddie Munson: My best friend Maya works with me and introduced me to this drink and I can't think of anything better for Eddie. You get a cup of lemonade, add some ice, pour a blonde espresso shot on top, and voila: The Cigarette Butt. It's got a sweetish smokey flavor, a little sour, a little weird. People either love it or hate it without giving it a try.

-Nancy Wheeler: I wanted to do something sensible for Nancy but something that would also be strong for a badass like Nancy. We often say that Iced Americanos are the hot girl drink so I knew I wanted it to be and Iced Americano. As for the extras, I wanted it to be blonde ristretto. Blonde Ristretto shots are the BEST kinda shots so it fits one of the best characters. As for cream: Almond Milk. She's giving lactose intolerant but in a "I prefer almond milk to soy milk" kinda way. She's not pretentious about it, but maybe a little.

-Robin Buckley: I was going back and forth with Robin. I had multiple ideas but narrowed it down to two. Number 1. Iced Vanilla Matcha with coconut milk OR Number 2. An Iced Chai with brown sugar syrup and oat milk. Either way, both scream Queer and Quirky. I also get a sort of library soft vibe from her. I'm picturing tans and old books, soft pastels, those kinda things. Arguably that's more a Nancy vibe as well but Robin is light academia and Nancy is dark.

- Jonathan Byers: This is a man that listens to good music and spends his day taking photographs and getting high. He's a sweater and slacks, a wallflower, the quiet calm in a chaotic storm. He's a London Fog, specifically with soy milk. Underappreciated and sometimes forgotten, this is a true pillar in every way. Teas have always been there and always will be, much like the steady reliability of Jonathan. The flavors are gentle and when paired with the vanilla it creates something complex and delightful.

- Argyle: This brochacho does NOT need coffee. He's bright and colorful, slightly overwhelming at times, but full of zest. When thinking of him, I wanted to choose the brightest, most colorful drink I could. He's a Mango Dragonfruit Lemonade with peach juice and pineapple pieces. This drink is the Starbucks ocean of flavor, but the pineapple comes freeze dried in a bag. Remember: Try before you deny.

- Hopper: I was going to leave this as just the Fruity Six, but I can't resist. Hopper is the McDonald's Dad. Hopper is a cup of black coffee.

[yandere-writer-momo]

Heart Shaped Wound: Yandere Various Baki x Fighter Reader

Reader grew up in Brazil but is not ethnically Brazilian (unless you are). I wanted to use a martial art I hadn’t seen show cases much in Baki so I decided to use Capoeira. Plus it’ll make more sense as the story progresses.

Also everyone is aged up past 21. Please let me know which characters you’d like to see. So far I have Katsumi, Retsu, Hanayama, and Jack as love interests.

I have an OC in this story who plays the role of your best friend. She is not going to interfere with the love interests. She is there as comic relief and for my guilty pleasure of sarcastic banter dialogue.

This story does not follow a specific timeline/ storyline in Baki. This is just a tournament being held.

Enjoy!

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    “I think you’re in the wrong place, little lady.” A simple man  wearing basketball shorts and a white wife beater smirked down at the (height) woman who stood in front of him and his friend. The two men continuing their sexist onslaught of the young woman. “This is where fighters come for the underground arena. It is not a shopping mall.”

   “But if you wait long enough, one of us could show you a really good time. You’re an awfully pretty young thing.” The other man licked his lips as his eyes hungrily wandered the girl’s form. The young woman trying her best not to hurl in disgust.

    The young woman with (hair length and color) hair tightly pulled up in a ponytail giggled, then two men blushing at the soft sound.

   “You know what I love about you violently sexist clowns? You actually think you’re nice guys. That you’re just ‘being friendly.’ You’d never hit a girl.” The young woman smirked at the group of men outside of the arena with a smirk. “I could do this-“ She then reeled her fist back, punching one of the guys in the face, knocking him out cold in an instant. “And you wouldn’t do a thing.”

    She then rose her muscular, (skin color) leg up, kicking the other man straight in the jaw. The much larger punk flying back, his back loudly colliding with the wall. 

    “Jesus! You’re not supposed to fight people when you arrive to the tournament, (your name)! You could get disqualified.” Another young  woman with dark skin and black hair approached the fighter, sweat falling down her face from trying to catch up to the (hair color) woman. Zaria nervously casted a glance at the two men who were out cold. “Let me guess? Sexism?”

    “You know me so well, Zaria.” (Your name) smiled at the brunette, the other girl laughing. “I feel like I could’ve done a lot worse. They’ll just be out for a hot minute. It shouldn’t deter them from fighting.”

   “I heard this place has the best fighters in the world that come here. I can’t believe Mister Tokugawa specifically asked for you to come here.”

    “He promised me a fun time. Plus when’s the last time a woman was asked to fight men. I don’t think it’s ever happened here.”

   “Maybe he’s going to find you a husband before you mom-“ Zaria bit her tongue at the glare (your name) sent her. Zaria raised her hands up to try to calm (your name) down. “I’m kidding. Just kidding.”

   “I have no interest in such earthly pleasures. I’ve been drinking a lot of matcha because I heard it makes you infertile.” (Your name) then cracked a smile at her best friend. “The bloodline ends with me.”

    “Please don’t say it like that. You sound like some old nun or something. Plus, your mom might fall over and die if she hears that.”

   “I hope she does. Maybe she’d stop pressuring me to get married. I’m only 22. I have plenty of time… if I live after today.”

    “You really need to stop wanting to die. I don’t think you’ve ever even kissed a man before.”

   “That’s because I’m saving these lips for the sweet kiss of death.” 

   “You’re insane.”

    “And you’re delusional. That’s why your last name starts with a D.” The two women shared a quick laugh before entering.

.

. 

.

   “Thank you so much for making it, miss (last name).” An elderly man greeted the young woman with a smile, his dark eyes soon darting over to her friend. “Oh and you brought another fighter with you?”

   Zaria bit back a laugh, (your name) interrupting her.

    “Oh she’s just my friend. She’s my lifetime travel companion and emotional support d-“

    “Yes, I’m here for emotional support.” Zaria intercepted (your name), her brown eyes glaring at the smiling woman. “I’ll be in the stands most of the time.”

    “Right…” Tokugawa then flashed (your name) another smile. “I’m happy to have you represent all the different Brazilian martial arts. I haven’t met a formidable female fighter.”

     “I don’t know if I should be flattered or insulted but either way I thank you for the opportunity.”

    “You’ll definitely get you fill here.” (Your name) elbowed Zaria in the ribs before the Latina could crack a dirty joke.

    “Follow me. I’ll show you where the other fighters are. You can get ready before your fight. You have about an hour till your match, so that should leave you enough time to mingle with the other fighters.”

   (Your name) and Zaria gave each other a look. The Afro Latina wiggling her eyebrows at her friend, (your name) immediately scrunching up her face in disgust.

    Tokugawa soon brought the two women into a room full of men, all eyes instantly flying to the pair in a mixture of bewilderment, awe, curiosity, and confusion. 

    “Play nicely, (your name). I’m only giving you this warning because of what happened before you came into the tournament.”

   “Word travels pretty fast here, huh? I’ll take it into consideration but no promises.” (Your name) gave Tokugawa a playful wink.

   Tokugawa laughed, his eyes crinkling in joy. “You’re funny. I like you. I’ll leave you to it then. Have fun.”

    “Hey now that we don’t have to be professional, why did you bring me along?” Zaria asked (your name). “Is it because I’m your best friend and most loyal companion.”

    “So if I snap my neck and become a vegetable, you can pull the plug.” (Your name) shrugged her shoulders at Zaria, the other girl scowling at how sarcastic (your name) was. “I’m kidding. Kind of. It’s so if I end up in the hospital, which I’m certain I will, I have someone there to support me.”

    “Emotionally? Physically?”

    “Both. Maybe put the pillow over my head and hold it down  super hard too-“

   “Hey what if people hear you, they might put you in a mental hospital.”

   “Anything to be away from my mother at this point.” 

   “Hello, ladies.” A tall muscular blonde interrupted the two, a wide smile on his abnormally muscular face. What the hell were they eating here to look like that? Steroids for breakfast, lunch, and dinner?

   “Hello.” Zaria smiled at the male, casting her friend a ‘do not speak’ look.

    “I noticed you’re the only two ladies here so I’d like to be the first to introduce myself. My name is Jack Hanma.”

    “It’s very nice to meet you. I’m Zaria Darosa and this is (your full name).” Zaria gestured to (your name) who was biting her tongue. The poor girl was almost in tears from not saying anything mean in less than five minutes. 

    “Well I’m guessing she’s the fighter. What kind of martial arts do you do?” Jack asked (your name), the young woman sighing. 

    “Capoeira.”

    “See I knew you two looked out of place. So you’re latinas?”

   “Well (your name) was originally born in (countries name) but she moved to Brazil when she was really young.” Zaria smiled at Jack, (your name) keeping a blank look on her face.

    “You scared of her talking?” Jack joked, his dark eyes studying (your name)‘s neutral expression. “I heard she’s pretty feisty.”

    “Oh she’s pretty nice once you get together. I swear on it.” Zaria nervously babbled, the young woman pointing at the sky. “Or may god strike me down if I’m lying.”

   (Your name) also looked up, the young woman moving closer to Zaria.

   “I’m going to stand in your general vicinity so that lightning hits both of us. So we die together.” (Your name) giggled, a smile enveloping her face.  “Because that’s a lie and you know it.”

   Jack released a loud laugh, causing Zaria to shake in fear. A competitive look flashing in (your name)’s eye.

   Jack perked up in surprise at the genuine expression on (your name)‘s face. (Your name) was definitely eye candy in this sausage fest of a tournament. Maybe that’s why he was so quick to try to stake a claim on her. This was the first time in history of a female martial artist being able to set foot in this tournament so she must be special if Tokugawa himself invited her here. That or Tokugawa was trying to be more progressive. But he highly doubted that. 

    “You’re funny. I like that in a lady.”

    “Careful I bite.”

    “So do I.” Jack bent down, flashing his teeth at (your name). (Your name) pressed her forehead to his, flashing her teeth as well. Their eyes staring the other down. Poor Zaria trying not to piss herself in fear.

    Jack pulled back with a chuckle. The muscular man placing his hands in his pockets in thought.

    “You’re very brave for your size. How about I take you out sometime?”

    “A fight or a date?” (Your name) asked, Zaria giving her friend a bewildered expression. 

    “You cannot be serious-“ Zaria whispered to (your name), her eyes blown wide open in shock.

    “Maybe both?” Jack smiled, the other men paying close attention to Jack.

    “How about maybe? You joke an awful lot, I somewhat like that in a man.” (Your name) flashed Jack a predatory smile, the two were like wild animals sizing each other up. Zaria began to tear up at how scary her friend’s face looked.

   “I’ll see you around then. Good luck to you, (your name).” 

    “And good luck to you too, Jack.” Jack waved at her before walking off. Zaria grasped (your name)’s shoulders in terror. 

    “Were you two flirting? What the actual hell? (Your name), te has vuelto loca? Te has vuelto loca?!”

    “Si, me volví loca hace mucho tiempo.” 

    “You’re a nut. A nut.”

    “Aren’t you allergic to nuts?”

    “I hate you.”

    The two girls smiled at each other, their eyes trained on a pair of men making their way towards them. A muscular man with short black hair and some of the thickest eyes brows (your name) has ever seen and his equally muscular friend with darker skin and long black hair that was pulled into a braid came over.

     “Hello. We would also like to introduce ourselves.” The taller of the two said with a smile, his friend respectfully bowing to the two. “I’m Orochi Katsumi and this is my best friend Kaiou Retsu.”

    “It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance.” Retsu gave the two a polite smile, his polite demeanor not going unnoticed by (your name).

    “It is nice to meet you as well.” (Your name) politely replied with a smile, Zaria nearly having a heart attack from how polite the normally feisty girl was being to the two strangers.

    “I am (your full name) and this is my best friend, Zaria Derosa. She traveled with me all the way from Brazil.”

    “I’m also from out of country. I’m from China.” Retsu smiled. “I trained in a temple there for a long time.”

   “That’s amazing, mister Kaiou.” (Your name) smiled. “I was trained by some wonderful dancers.”

    “You may call me Retsu. And do you do capoeira? I don’t think I’ve seen a capoeira fighter here yet. I admire the origins.”

    “That’s right. I ever learned from some wonderful people throughout the years.”

    “You learned every dance you could. You love dancing.” Zaria joked. “Maybe we could go dancing after all of this. It’ll be fun.”

    “Oh you enjoy dancing?” Katsumi piped up with a smile. “I think there’s a place that offers salsa dancing around here. Retsu and I could show you two.”

    Zaria wiggled her brows at (your name), the female fighter ignoring her. 

    “Maybe. We shall see. I’m guessing you do karate.” 

    “Yes. I am a third dan of Shinshinkai karate.” Katsumi nervously fiddled with his hands, his dark eyes focused on (your name)‘a face. “If you ever want to stop by, I can teach you some karate.”

    “I’m very happy to meet you. And maybe I will if you’re interested in learning some capoeira. I am not sure of who I am fighting yet but I wish the two of you luck.”

   The two men gave Zaria and (your name) a curt bow good bye Katsumi’s face flushing slightly pink. The karate prodigy whispering excitedly to his friend.

    “I think he likes you too.” Zaria hummed her brows narrowed at her friend. “And so did his friend. I’m a little jealous of you today. But then again, none of the guys here are my type.”

    “Well I did beat up all the male fighters in central and South America so I don’t really have any interest in anyone back home.”

    “I remember. Your mother was crying because you beat up every suitor she found.”

    “I will not stop fighting. It’s something that is such a big role in my life. I will never give it up for anyone.” (Your name) frowned at the thought of her mother. Even though the old woman could be a bit much, (your name) knew her mother held (your name)’s best interest at heart. “I think she’ll understand after we’re done here. I probably won’t go back to Brazil if I enjoy it here.”

    “What?”

    “If the fighters are as good as mister Tokugawa say they are, I won’t leave. I’ll stay here forever.” (Your name) chuckled at her friend’s mortified expression. “You could always visit me-“

   “No I’m going to live with you. Who will keep you out of trouble?” Zaria joked, causing (your name) to crack a smile. 

   “You’re the best.” 

   (Your name) shivered, the young woman slowly turning her head to glance at the person who was staring holes into her head. (Eye color) eyes clashing with the dark eyes of a massive man covered in scars. A predatory smile crawling on her lips at how intense his stare was.

   “You need to stop smiling like that. You could probably kill some one with a look like that.”

    “No. I just smile like this when I’m excited about fighting.” The scarred man simply took off his glasses and continued sizing her up from a distance. (Your name) could feel it in her bones that this man was powerful. Maybe even stronger than Jack, Katsumi, and Retsu.

    “Well it’s scary and you need to stop.”

   “Make me.” (Your name) continued her staring match with the stranger until he finally turned away. The ‘terrifying’ smile finally off of her face.

    “We’re going to be finding out who your march is soon. So save your scary faces for later.”

    “Okay, mom.” The two girls giggled before (your name) began to stretch. A smile on her face. She really hoped to face off against the man covered in scars. She felt as if he’d be the biggest challenge for her to beat.

   She just hoped everything went smoothly until she was fighting the big dogs. They seemed to be the ones everyone else were avoiding like the plague. Yet they didn’t seem to be aware of what she was capable quite yet. But they would learn. They would all learn of how deadly capoeira could be when it’s sped up and actually connecting the hits.

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Author’s note: thank you for reading!

[chaotic-on-main]

Summer Event! 💕

Matcha Green Tea Ice Cream,

Kitchen Sink option but make it a surprise!

Thank you for being so understanding & sweet, I get really anxious if you can't tell haha. You're a dear💕✨

Order up!! One matcha green tea cone with everything but the kitchen sink for Eri!!

Sky's Summer and 250 Follower Event!

☾ Pairings ➼ janitor!Levi Ackerman x fem!people-pleaser!Reader

☾ Content/Warnings ➼ modernAU, meet-cute(kinda?), familial trauma, hurt/comfort, fluff, accidental therapy (for me), corporate ick

☾ Author's Note ➼ Hi Eri!! Thank you so much for sending this request in. I was a little worried with the whole "make it a surprise" because I struggle with lack of structure BUT I'm so proud of how this came out. I couldn't stop writing, as you can see. This might be a little self-indulgent and I hope I got the emotions right since I struggle with them. I just want Levi to call me out on my shit, okay?? Anyways, I hope you enjoy!! love you k bye *smooches*

☾ Word Count ➼ ~7.6k (oops)

“Hi, you’re the new hire right? It’s nice to meet you, I’m Carol from a few rows down. Listen, I hate to do this to you since you’re so new but you’re the only one I can ask. Would you be able to do the data entry on the Sina job? I can’t stay past closing tonight due to my set plans and unfortunately it’s due tomorrow morning. Could you help me out? I’ll pay you back!”

The voice of your overly excited brunette coworker reverberates through your skull as you type away at your desk, the bright light of your monitor biting at your eyes just like the migraine you feel in the back of your head. You had a feeling that this is not the first time the people in the office have picked on the newcomers, and you bet it wouldn’t be the last. You chalk it up the fact that you were still in the office past seven in the evening doing someone else’s work because they dropped the stack of papers on your desk before you could say anything back, but you knew better. Damn your pathological people pleasing tendencies.

Your chair squeaks as you lean back in it, closing your eyes and pinching the bridge of your nose as you sigh heavily. It’s a handful of days into your first week and you’re already daydreaming about your next vacation. An office job was not your first go to, but as all struggling artists do, you needed this job to supplement your income until your art took off – if that ever happened.

Thoughts of how much longer you’d have to be here swirl through your mind when you’re interrupted by a loud thunk a few cubicles down. It startles you so much that you jump up as your eyes shoot open, hand over your heart in an attempt to calm it. You weren’t aware of anyone else in the building so you can’t help but think there might be a mass murderer just feet away from you. Steeling your resolve, you push yourself up from your chair and carefully peek over the half wall to see what had made that noise.

At first you don’t see anything as your eyes adjust from seeing nothing to the semi-lit office floor from the setting sun and dimmed overheads. Down the row, you see the back of a man in what you assume to be a gray janitor’s suit. An undercut peeks between short raven locks, neck lines sharp giving away to a clean cut. It doesn’t seem like he notices you’re there as his attention is focused on the waste basket in front of him.

You sit back down slowly, heaving a heavy sigh from relief that it was indeed not a mass murderer – well, that you know of. He didn’t seem threatening from far away at least. Your hands hover on the keyboard as you do your best to blink away the tired. Only a few more pages now, you reassure yourself.

An hour later, miraculously you find yourself down to the last page. The miscellaneous words and numbers swim off the page as you force yourself to focus. With the promise of a late night treat, you finally make it down to the last line. Just as you’re about to hit ‘enter’, something kicks the back of your chair causing you to yelp loudly and slam down on the keys harder than you meant.

“What are you still doing here?” A deep voice grumbles from behind you, making your ears twitch at the sudden volume difference. You twist around in your chair to see who the voice belongs to and you’re surprised to see it coming from the janitor you saw earlier. What’s even more surprising is how young he looks, and handsome to boot - despite the look he’s giving you. Stark gray-blue lidded eyes stare down at you as he scowls, eyebrows pinched together. He doesn’t look pleased.

“I-I’m sorry. I’m working on some…” Your voice falters when his expression turns into annoyance.

“You’re in my way.” He simply states as he leans against a vacuum you only now notice sitting under his arm. Was your focus so strong that you completely missed the sounds of him cleaning around you?

“Oh, uh. Yeah, let me get out of your way then.” You say timidly, pushing yourself out of the chair. You’re face to face with him at standing height, even in your work heels. This was a very intimidating man despite his short stature.

“I’m not going to clean with you breathing down my neck.” He grumbles, eyes narrowing at you like you asked him the most offensive question known to man. Your lips part as you struggle to find your words, but nothing comes out as you find yourself low-key panicking.

“I c-can just-”

“Just finish what you’re working on, I’ll just come back.” He rolls his eyes before walking away, leaving you and the vacuum illuminated by your computer screen. You ball your hands in fists to keep them from shaking.

Exhaling a weak breath, you sit back down and force yourself to focus on the last line of data instead of the glowering expression of your office’s janitor.

.

You slam your forehead into the vinyl coating of your desk, not hard enough to leave a bruise but enough to hear the echoes of contact through the whole floor. It’s nearing seven at night again and you’re still in office catching up on yet another coworker’s workload.

When they asked what plans you had tonight, you didn’t think that saying you were going home to watch TV would bite you in the ass. If you were completely honest, you had quietly hoped they might be asking if you wanted to go out for drinks with them. After all, they were the only ones that had really talked to you in the past few weeks but you’re starting to wonder if they were just trying to butter you up to get you to say yes to their requests.

Who were you kidding though, you would have said yes anyways because the word ‘no’ didn’t exist in your vocabulary. You wish you weren’t so aware of that fact because not only are you stressed out, you’re full of self loathing. A groan escapes your lips.

“Still doing other people’s work?” You hear a familiar voice grumble from behind.

After lifting your head up from the cool desk, you swivel around in your chair to see the janitor – this time in dark blue. A white handkerchief wraps around his face, covering his mouth and nose so that all you see are his tired eyes. A same-colored bandana adorns his head with some of his bangs falling into his eyes. You bite your tongue to keep yourself from asking what the point of the bandana was if it didn’t keep his hair out of his face.

It takes you a moment to find your voice, partly from not using it for so long but also because of the steady unfriendly feeling radiating off him. He raises an eyebrow at you as you stare up at him almost dumbfounded.

“I- who said I was doing other people’s work?” You finally make out, voice trembling.

“You’re new, right? The office goons do that to every newbie that comes in.” He folds his arms over his chest and you see that his sleeves are rolled up to show his toned forearms, muscles popping up from the position they’re in. Your eyes flicker back up to his, blinking slowly.

“I’m sure but they needed the help, so...”

“Because they would rather slack off than do any work. They’re taking advantage of you and you’re falling for it? You’re an adult, right?” There isn’t malice in his words but they still sting.

“Of course I am! I work here, don’t I?” Your eyes widen in emphasis, sweeping your hands around you.

“Tch, that doesn’t make you an adult. I’ve been here for years and I’ve seen my fair share of children.” His scowl reappears at those words. You’ve never met someone so grumpy.

You close your mouth at that, not sure what else to say. He clicks his tongue and flips a small towel over his shoulder. Turning on his heel, he sets off down the aisle without another word, the sounds of his heavy boots getting quieter.

You don’t get done until 10:30 that night. On your way out, you pass by the janitor who was currently on the inside of the board meeting glass walls, wiping them down with what you suppose is glass cleaner. His eyes meet yours as you walk by and you offer a small wave and smile even though his short words still sting. You think he’s going to ignore you but instead, he gives you a curt nod.

.

The janitor’s words swim through your mind the next time you’re asked to stay behind to help out. You spent the last couple of weeks doing your best practicing in the shower on setting boundaries with your coworkers but when the person who came to you next was your supervisor, how could you say no.

You were in the middle of packing your bag while lost in thought of your weekend plans when she came to you. You’re thinking you might stop by the evening market by the river before heading home with some food from the local vendors when a finger taps on your shoulder followed by your name coming out in a honey-laced voice.

“Hey, I just wanted to stop by and commend you on being such a team player in the last month. It’s something we find rare in someone as young as you and of course we’re grateful.” Your red-haired boss beams down at you while she talks. The feeling of ice pricks in your veins at what you know was coming next.

“I’m really sorry to come to you so last minute and on a Friday no less, but because of your wonderful work ethic, you’re the only one I can trust to complete The Warrior Project. It’s been extremely slow going and we need it done by Monday. Do you think you can stay behind and help us out?” She offers you an apologetic smile, eyes boring into yours with sincerity.

You wished you could have said no but the words died before they made it out of your mouth, instead agreeing meekly with a fake smile.

So now here you sit at your desk with the dying rays of light rising higher against the back walls as the sun sets, fingers flying across the keyboard. You suppose you’ll have to stop by the late night convenience store on the way home for some dinner; your face scrunches up at the thought of your very limited choices.

“If you type any harder, you’ll break it.” You don’t bother to turn around at the voice, knowing damn well who it was.

“I’m sure they’ll get me another one. They need me to finish this, after all.” You mutter the last part under your breath. The smell of something sweet and tangy hits your nose and on contact, your stomach rumbles loudly.

Swiveling in your chair, you’re met with the janitor who’s simultaneously holding a feather duster as well as a bag of what looks like Chinese take-out. Your eyes widen at the sight, bouncing back and forth between the objects in his hand.

“Are you here to eat or dust?” You ask, finally looking up to his face. There’s no expression on his pretty face. You still haven’t gotten over how stunning he was, with his pointed nose and pouty bottom lip. Today he has his janitor uniform half on, the sleeves of the suit tied around his waist so that it’s only pants. Tucked in is a black t-shirt that shows more of his muscular arms. He’s not ripped by any means but it’s very obvious he exercises on his time off.

“I’m here to dust. This is for you to eat.” He says dryly, shoving the bag in your direction. Once again, you find your words stolen as you stare at the brown paper bag that sits curled in his pale fingers. Your eyes shift back and forth between his face and the food.

“F-for me? Why?”

“Whenever I see you here late, you never eat. You need to take better care of yourself.”

“I eat when I get home.” You retort back softly. A late night meal for you consists of a single serving bag of chips and whatever looked edible at the convenience store – but you wouldn’t tell him that.

“Just eat it.” He pushes it forward to you again, the warm smells of food wafting past your nose. It smelled like heaven.

“I- no. I can’t take that, it’s yours!” You wave your hands in front of your chest in a dismissive manner. A dark eyebrow shoots up his face.

“So she can say no.” He reaches over you and places the paper bag down on your desk. Along with the smells of delicious food, the scent of clean laundry and musky pine tickles your nose. It’s a very pleasant combination, and one you were not expecting. “Eat it, throw it away, I don’t care.” He says casually before turning around and walking off. Your hand reaches out in an attempt to stop him, but he’s long gone.

Twisting your chair around, you eye the paper bag for a moment before finally caving. Your stomach is about to eat itself and he had paid for it, so you don’t want to waste it. Why he would care enough about you to order food is a mystery, though.

Upon opening the contents, you’re greeted with a small foil dish with a plastic covering holding what you believe is orange chicken. A little white box off to the side contains sticky rice and in the little plastic package next to it holds some spring rolls – all still steaming hot and smelling wonderful.

You spend the next half hour scarfing down your dinner while thinking about how you’d pay the janitor back. The flush that started creeping up your cheeks at the end of your encounter with him stays even when you go to bed late that night.

.

The week after, you intentionally slow down on your daily work so that you had a reason to stay late and finish it. But much to your dismay, you don’t see the janitor anywhere. You’d leave each night a little embarrassed at yourself for being so excited for someone you’ve talked to a handful of times, but to your benefit you had a reason for your madness.

Finally, you gather enough courage to peep your head over your half-wall and grab your coworker’s attention – whose attention was on a mobile game in his hands and not on the spreadsheets in front of his face.

“Ryan?” You whisper-shout down. Your brunette coworker’s eyes shoot up to yours, almost in a panic.

“What? Is the boss lady making her rounds?” He asks back. You sweep your eyes around the office floor and finally find your supervisor who was currently in a meeting with other board members.

“She’s busy, you’re fine. I actually had a question?” You didn’t realize how soft you were speaking until he stood up to meet you, towering a good foot above you with his ear down to you.

“What’s up?”

“I was wondering if you knew when the janitor might be back? I haven’t seen him in a few days.” You subconsciously start picking at your nails – a nervous habit.

Ryan stares at you as he processes your words before throwing his head back in bellowing laughter. You’re quick to shush him and duck your head down from the glares aimed your way at such a loud disturbance.

“Not so loud!!” You whisper-shout again.

“I’m sorry, I’m just curious why you want to know? He doesn’t like anyone, and no one likes him.” He shrugs his shoulders. You so badly want to tell him to shut up and that you like him, but instead you settle on trying to get him to answer your question.

“Well, what’s his schedule?” You narrow your eyes in hopes of getting the message across that you were serious.

“Well, that’s the thing, he’s always working. Sometimes even on the weekends. From what I heard, his cleaning routes are the same every week. He doesn’t get to our floor until late in the week. He has a thing for cleaning, so I heard, and that’s why there’s only one janitor contracted. He’s so weird.” Ryan rolls his eyes as he rests his chin against the top of the wall.

“What’s his name?”

“Why do you care so much about the janitor?” It’s Ryan’s turn to narrow his eyes to you. You’re asking too many questions and he’s getting far too nosy about your business. It’s best to retreat for now.

“Uh, it’s nothing. Thank you.” You squeak before plopping yourself down at your chair and pretending to click around on your word documents until you no longer feel the pierce of your coworker’s stare.

So he’s always here, you think. You’re just missing him on your way down. You bite back a smile as you glance down to the clock at the bottom corner of your screen. The time reads 4:37pm and it’s a Thursday which meant that he would be around your floor this evening. Perfect. Your eyes sweep over to your bag in your excitement.

In the time it takes for you to wait for the gray-blue eyed janitor, you’ve finished half of the next day’s work. A part of you starts to wonder if he isn’t coming tonight, that it may be tomorrow instead, and weirdly you find yourself hoping one of your coworkers would ask you to help them out again so that you had a reason to stay.

“That’s so stupid.” You say out loud as you stir sugar into the black tea you had spent the last 5 minutes steeping. You’re standing in the office break room, lost in thought.

“I’m sure the mug doesn’t feel that way.” That voice makes your heart flutter, and you bite back the smile that threatens to curve into your face. Instead, you pinch your lips together and turn around.

The janitor is there alright, uniform zipped up tight as he holds a spray bottle and a rag. He’s leaning against the doorframe of the break room, arms folded across his chest. His black hair falls into his face, almost kissing the corners of his heavy-lidded eyes as they watch you intently.

“Ah, there you are!” You exclaim, pointing your spoon at him.

“Here I am.”

“I have something to give you as payback for dinner last week.” You muse, grinning at him. His eyes widened briefly before going back to normal.

“And why would you do that?”

“Because I’m grateful for it, dummy.” Carefully, you place your spoon next to your mug and walk towards him until you’re face to face. It takes him a moment to realize you were waiting for him to move, and carefully he backs away so that you have room to escape.

“Stay here, I’ll be right back.” You order before dashing off to your cubicle.

When you come back with the gift in hand, you see that the janitor hadn’t moved an inch. His intimidating eyes follow you as you stop in front of him, slightly breathless from speed walking back. An eyebrow raises at you as he waits for you to catch your breath.

“I-ah. Okay. So. I made these for you. I ended up having to make a fresh batch because I didn’t see you for a bit and I didn’t want to feed you stale cookies so. Anyways, here. Thank you for feeding me last week.” You beam up at him as you hold your hands out to show him your gift.

It’s a small plastic bag wrapped with a pastel bow. The contents of the bag include bite sized cookies that you spent all last night remaking in hopes you would see him again. They’re pale yellow in color, dusted with a light coat of cane sugar. His eyes widen again at your gesture, this time staying big as they stare at the bag in your hand like its gold.

“You… made these for me?” His voice is low.

“I did! I don’t know if you like sweets but these are my mother’s recipe and her cookies were never that sweet. Pretty much the sweetness comes from the sugar on top. The rest are just buttery goodness.” You gush as you stare off in thought, the happy memories of your mom making these cookies for you flooding your brain.

When your eyes fall back to the raven-haired man, you’re almost tempted to run away in embarrassment. His neutral expression stares back at you and you take a small step back.

“I’m sorry, this is probably weird. You don’t have to take them actually. In fact, I’ll just le-“

“No, you’re fine. I uh, I appreciate it.” He quickly reaches out and grabs the bag, the sound of crinkling plastic taking up space in the nearly empty mess room. You offer him a small smile, grateful that he accepted the gift. His eyes trail past you and onto the kitchen counter behind you. He purses his lips as he thinks but finally opens his mouth to speak.

“Pour that disgusting excuse for a tea out and follow me. Bring the mug.” He says tersely before turning on his heels and out the door. You blink hard a few times as your brain processes his words but quickly you find yourself dumping out the tea and chasing after him down the cubicle aisles.

Soon, you’re sitting on the ground with the janitor as he pours steaming amber liquid from the thermos he pulled out of his cleaning cart just mere moments ago. It splashes into the bottom of your mug and fills it quickly, then he hands it over to you as he starts speaking.

“So are you a workaholic or…” He gives you a side eye.

“I should be asking you that. I’ve been told you work practically every day, even on weekends.” You hold the mug by the handle as you stare down into the cup. “Is this…?”

“It’s tea and no I didn’t poison it.”

“What was wrong with the tea I had?”

“Stale tea leaves don’t make for a good cup of tea.” He states like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “No, I’m not a workaholic. I like to clean, and I get paid for it. Plus, I’m left alone. Usually.” He grumbles the last part, but you don’t detect any hostility in his voice.

“Well, I’m not either. A-a workaholic, I mean.”

“No, I suppose not. Just a people pleaser then?” His statement makes you splutter on the tea you had just sipped on. Despite it going almost everywhere, the bitter taste of the dark leaves bite at your taste buds. It’s unsweetened and you can’t keep the slight look of distaste off your face. Luckily, it’s covered up by the glare you shoot his way.

You don’t say anything back at that, knowing any denial would have been a lie but you didn’t want to confirm it either. However, you can’t hold back the annoyance that simmers in your chest at such a presumptuous statement, from someone you hardly know, no less.

“Beats being disliked by everyone.” You mutter finally, setting your mug on the floor next to you. Your eyes drift to the floor-to-ceiling window you were both sitting in front of. The last dreg of golden sunlight warms your face as you stare out into the bustling city as they prepare for the evening.

“You say that like it should bother me.”

“Shouldn’t it though?”

“Why would it?”

“Don’t you want people to like you?” You whisper softly, dragging your gaze over to his face. There’s no readable expression on his face as he sips his tea out of the top of his thermos lid. He’s holding it in a way you’ve never seen before – long fingers gripping the metal from the top rim and tilting it back into his mouth.

“I don’t give a shit if they like me or not.” He says finally as he gives you a side eye.

You’re not sure if your surprise at his callous attitude is warranted or not. Your interactions with him have been few and far in between but that night he got you dinner, you thought maybe he was a little more caring than that.

“Why do you care if people like you anyway?” He leans back on a hand, his other cradling his cup.

“I just- well. I don’t know.” You say simply. You do know.

“I read this thing about people-pleasers. It said that they’re great manipulators. They bend and break just so that others tolerate and like them, pretending to be something they’re not. Are you trying to get something out of it?”

Your eyes snap to his, feeling the heat behind your stare at his insinuation. Where did he get off calling you a manipulator? A pretender? Despite the subtle rage dancing in your eyes, you give him a smile and push yourself off the ground, grabbing your mug on your way up.

“Thank you for the tea. I really must be going now.” You say politely, voice coming out higher than you meant.

“Tch.” Is all you get back.

With that, you turn on your heel and head back to the break room to pour your tea out and rinse the mug, leaving it out on the rack to dry. You’re quick to gather your things before practically running down the aisles to the elevator, down to the front door, and towards home. A lump in your throat stays even after your shower and still when you lie down for the night.

.

After your last encounter with the janitor, you find that you’re rushing home as soon as you can. You aren’t necessarily mad at him for telling you a hard truth, but the rumination of having someone being annoyed at you doesn’t go away.

Your evasive tactics work for a while. Your office was in between projects and jobs so no one had come to you for help for anything. But of course that didn’t stay that way for long and your luck would run out as it always had as the quarter was about to close. Your supervisor came to you early on a rainy Tuesday morning to tell you that some freak accident had happened to the last reports which made the data you spent days organizing completely disappear.

You don’t know what was more frustrating: the fact that your hard work from the last week had completely vanished or the fact that no one in the office offered to give a helping hand when you needed it the most.

Your supervisor apologized and said the entries needed to be done by the next morning so they could be submitted in time for the quarter review. With a forced smile and false-positive voice, you agreed and got started on it right away.

This was about 12 hours ago.

The only thing that brings you solace is the knowledge that the janitor was not due for your floor for a couple days so at least you could work on it without worrying about running into him. And thankfully for you since you were semi-prepared for being held back, you ordered pizza for dinner before the front doors locked for the evening.

For some reason, you find yourself sitting on the floor in the same spot you had shared bitter tea with the janitor. You’re lying on your back with your phone hovering as you scroll on it mindlessly, a more than half filled pizza box next to you with the lid propped open slightly. There’s a vacation photo that pops up from one of your acquaintances that makes your chest tighten from envy.

“You’re in my way, brat.” A voice from above rings out. It startles you so much that your fingers loosen on your phone, and it comes smacking into your face with a loud slap. Your eyes scrunch shut from the stinging pain radiating from your nose as you groan softly.

You sit up from your position, making sure to grab your phone before it falls on the ground, and turn to narrow your eyes at the perpetually scowling janitor. You hear a subtle pop in your back as you do.

“What are you doing here?” Your voice comes out more accusatory than you meant, and you end up clearing your throat before giving him a forced smile.

“I’m working. That’s more than I can say for you.”

“You’re not supposed to be on this floor today.”

“Says who?” An eyebrow quirks at your statement.

The words die on your tongue because even you knew that one person’s word was not enough to be reliable. You reach over to close the pizza box and gather your things to leave. He doesn’t say anything and only stares while you push yourself up onto your feet.

“I’ll just get out of your way, then.” You mumble, bending down to grab the pizza box in one hand and your empty cup in the other. As you brush past him, you can’t help but wonder if he’s still mad at you, though you can’t logically find a reason why he would be mad in the first place. And if he was, then what did you do? These thoughts are jarred as a vibration in your back pocket alerts you to a notification. Upon more buzzes and the start of your soft ringtone, you realize it’s a phone call.

Stepping over to the nearest desk, you set your stuff down and pull out your phone. On the screen is the caller ID for your mom, her faux-happy face staring straight at you as the lights around it pulse. You don’t fight the grimace that etches into your features. Hitting the green button, you regret it immediately.

“Hi mom!” You exclaim, forcing another smile on your lips.

“There you are! I really thought you had died on us.”

“Of course, I’m not dead. Just busy!” You state happily, turning around to face the windows again. A relieved sigh escapes when you notice the janitor is no longer standing where he was.

“You should call us more. You know I was talking to our neighbor about you recently! Remember Donna and her kids? Apparently her youngest just got engaged. And it got me thinking…” Your mother’s words trail off as your eyes glaze over. Your pulse is steadily picking up speed with every word, and you grip the edge of the desk tightly to keep yourself grounded.

“Anyways, both of your sisters are coming to visit with their little families. When are you planning to come by? It would be nice to have everyone home again. Maybe this time with a man on your arm?”

“Oh, I don’t know, mom. I just started here, so getting the time off will be a little hard to do right away. But I will ask my supervisor, and see? I want to see everyone too.” Your voice wavers a little as the muscles in your face start to hurt from your smile.

“Your grandmother is asking about you, you know. I had to come up with some excuse about why you’re so far away, and single no less.”

“I’m working on it. I’ll give her a call soon.” Tears prick in the corners of your eyes.

“Well, I’m sure you are, honey. Oh, your little sister is calling, I need to go. Please call us more!” And just like that, the line goes silent as she hangs up.

“I’ll call tomorrow, I guess.” You whisper down at the blank screen. Setting your phone down, you press the heels of your palms into your eyes to get rid of the wetness that threatens to overflow. You practically feel your heart beating right out of your chest as your mom’s words float around your head.

“I see where it comes from now.” The janitor’s deep voice comes from the right of you. When you pull your hands away to look at him, he’s holding out a steaming mug to you. Hesitantly, you take it. The color of the liquid is lighter in color and smells slightly floral. A mile’s difference from the last thing he shared with you.

“Where what comes from?” You mutter before bringing the cup to your lips. It’s hot but not unbearably so. The taste is gentle and has a touch of sweetness to it. It’s pleasant, and not something you were expecting.

“Your people-pleasing tendencies.” He leans against the half wall next to him as he eyes you.

“Please do enlighten me, as I’m not sure what you’re getting at.” You reply back in a monotone voice. You were tired in more ways than one. Slaving away at this project that you were only 80% done with. Staying late, lack of sleep, and now your mother calling. You were tired and you can’t mask anymore.

“Let me guess.” He raises his hand and taps a finger against his chin in thought. “Middle child. Your parents always apologized for what you lacked. Always felt like you had to put in extra effort to be seen and walking on eggshells so that when you are seen, no one pulls away. You’re starving for real, positive attention.” Again, none of his words come out malicious but they really sting. This man hardly knows you and yet he’s spreading your entire childhood out like it was nothing.

You’re tired.

“Yeah. Exactly that. And it’s infuriating. Not to drag on my sisters because they’re doing their best and they have the same parents I have but it’s like…” You take another sip of the honey liquid before continuing, feeling the heat of not only the tea but also anger burning in your chest. Your eyes drift back to the front window.

“I can’t stop myself from doing above and beyond on the off chance I might be liked and appreciated. I’m putting in all this hard work and still it doesn’t matter. I’m just so tired.”

The sun is all but gone and is replaced by the city lights that illuminate the indigo sky above. The janitor stays quiet through all of this as he takes in your words. You’ve never told anyone any of this before, and part of you feels liberated. The other part feels guilty for putting something so heavy on someone who probably doesn’t even care.

“So, what if it doesn’t matter? Why are you putting so many expectations on yourself? You’re just one person.” He stands up from the wall and walks around it so that he’s face to face with you. His arms are folded across his chest again as he eyes you warily before continuing.

“I spend everyday cleaning after you shits and no one sees that. And yet, what I do matters because otherwise this place would be a shithole. You do not have to bend over backwards so people can see your accomplishments, they still exist whether they see it or not. But, say they approve of your help, then what?”

“What do-” Your fingers grip tight on the handle of your mug.

“They say thank you for doing what they asked you to do, then what? Do you keep up with their demands?”

“If I have to.”

“And what do you gain from that outside of exhaustion?”

You want to lie so bad. You want to say that you get a lot of enjoyment from making others happy. That you gain happiness for making others smile because you did what they ask of you. But you realize that putting yourself out there for the sake of others is wearing you down. And you aren’t actually happy.

“I don’t.” Your voice cracks and when you blink next, your sight is blurry.

“That’s what I’m saying. You bend and you bend for these short bursts of attention but you don’t need it. The only thing that should matter to you is your wellbeing. The rest comes after.” His voice retains the same dryness as it had before, but there’s an unmistaken lilt of tenderness.

You look away from his gaze and wipe the corners of your eyes with the back of your hand as you take a shaky breath.

“Don’t take this the wrong way, but why do you care so much about me?” You offer him a small smile to hopefully deter any ill will that statement could bring up.

“Tch, don’t get me wrong, you’re still annoying. But, I can’t stand watching people tear themselves down for the sake of others. You’re here to live for yourself, not for them.” His steely eyes roll to the ceiling before landing back on you.

“Right. Well. I’ll keep that in mind.” You smile at him, a genuine one that squeezes your eyes closed. “Thank you for taking the time to talk to me, even if your words are a little rough.” He huffs at that then nods curtly, tapping his foot on the ground.

“On that note, I need to-“

“Will you stay with me?” Your words come out faster than you can stop yourself. A sudden burst of warmth blooms into your face. “I-I mean, if you want. I just have this pizza left and-“

“Do you want me to stay?” He stares hard at you as he reads your reaction. You have a feeling he’s testing you.

Do you want that?

Yes, you do.

“Please stay?”

He considers you for a moment before relaxing, his arms falling to his sides.

“Okay.”

Once again, you find yourself on the floor with the janitor, knees tucked into your chest as you’re lost in thought. He sits a few feet away, slowly chewing on a just heated up piece of pizza while he stares out into the night. Your eyes never leave his face, watching the way his long eyelashes tickle his cheekbones and the way his hair falls in his face. You notice the dark circles that bruise the underside of his eyes.

“Do you ever take time off?” You ask softly.

“I never needed to.”

“You look really tired.”

“That’s just my face.” You laugh at that and he gives you a side eye. He wasn’t expecting that from you.

“Where would you go if you ever took time off?” You ask despite the fact he might ignore you as he didn’t seem the type to indulge such stupid questions, but he surprises you.

“Home.” He says without skipping a beat.

“Home? Really? Are you not home that often that you miss it more or something?”

“It’s quiet and all of my things are there. Where else would I go?” He stares at you with a perturbed expression. His dry voice adds to his comment and you find it very endearing. You think you see his lip twitch, but it might have been your imagination.

“What about you?”

Leaning back on your hands, you stretch your legs out with a soft groan and stare out the window. By this time, it’s well into 9pm and you still have work to do. But with the janitor staring at you, you find yourself pushing the thought of work away for now.

“Don’t laugh. But I really want to experience a day in that park off of Centennial. I heard it’s really nice in the afternoon because of the trees and little river that cuts through it. I would love to just sit out on a blanket and draw for a bit.” You say wistfully. You can already feel the heat of the sun against your skin.

“You’re an artist?”

“Yeah, struggling and starving as most are. But I draw when I can.”

He hums softly. “That sounds like a good day.” He says, wiping his hands on the towel that was tied to his utility belt around his waist.

You beam over to him at that. You again think to yourself of why people don’t like him. He was blunt and a little tactless, but he was caring and empathetic. Something you wouldn’t see from the outside. You liked him for just being himself with you.

Realization dawns on you at what his words meant earlier. Just being you was enough. You matter.

“Thank you.” You say simply, a toothy grin pointed his way.

.

A month passes and you find yourself steadily settling more into your job. You haven’t seen the janitor much since that one night. When you got home after that conversation, you made a promise you would only do things that you wanted to do for the sake of yourself and not others. The next time your coworker came to you for help, you were able to put your foot down and tell them no. Your voice and hands shook the whole time, but since then you haven’t been bothered. Unfortunately, you helped your supervisor when asked but you are proud of the progress that you made with your boundaries.

And now, here you are on a blanket in Centennial Park on a Thursday, lying on your stomach with your sketchbook propped open in front as you pop grapes into your mouth. There’s dark charcoal smudged along the side of your hands but you can’t find yourself caring as you finish a hooded eye with a flourish. It’s a nice day with a light breeze that helps keep you cool and soft music flows through your ears from your earphones, quiet enough so that you can be aware of your surroundings.

You’ve been at the park for so long that you’re almost done with your drawing and you’re thinking you should have brought a book to read when something kicks your foot. It makes you jump and your head twists behind you to see who or what it was. You assume it’s a child that kicked their ball too far as that happened earlier, but instead you scrunch your eyes to make sense of the figure in front of you.

Your eyes trail up to find it's a man dressed in dark jeans and a t-shirt, with a pair of oversized headphones circling his neck and sunglasses covering his eyes. The shades are dark but you can only assume he’s staring down at you. In his hands are two hot to-go cups.

“Can I help you?” You ask up to the mystery man, not hiding the annoyance in your tone.

“So she does take a day off. It’s nice to see you away from the computer screen.” The voice is familiar and you find yourself scrambling up to your feet, staring at him hard. He’s the same height as you and you notice his lips are all too familiar. They’re the same ones belonging to the drawing you just finished.

“You’re the janitor! What are you doing here?” Your annoyance quickly changes into surprise.

“Took the day off and I’m meeting a friend.” He raises one of the cups which you assume must be his friend’s. “And you can just call me Levi, by the way.” He grumbles the last bit. You only now realize you never asked for his name in any of the interactions you’ve had with him. Your face flares in embarrassment.

“I- yeah. I’m sorry, that’s so rude of me to have never asked.” You tell him your name as well but he just nods.

“I know who you are, and it’s fine.” He shrugs, tone dry as ever.

“You know my name? But how?” You don’t remember telling him your name. Nor has he ever been around to hear it be said. You raise an eyebrow at him.

“You have a plaque on your desk.”

“Oh. Yeah, that’s fair.” You run a hand through your hair as you laugh at that. You don’t notice the way his eyes flicker from your sweet face to the sketch behind you on the ground. He huffs softly at that.

“Well, I can’t keep them waiting so. I guess I’ll see you when I see you.” He murmurs before turning on his heel in the opposite direction.

“Wait, Levi!” You yell, taking a few steps towards him. His head tilts back in your direction so that you see his blue-gray eyes side-eying you from behind his sunglasses.

“What?”

“Would you like to get some tea with me sometime?” You ask quickly. Your voice wavers slightly with anxiety as you shift uncomfortably from one foot to the other.

“Are you sure you don’t have other people’s work to complete first?” You laugh at that.

“No. I don’t think that will be a problem.” The sides of his mouth twitches.

“Then sure. Only if you bring your mom’s cookies again.” He raises his cup at you before turning his back to you and walking down the hill.

You sit back down with a grin, staring down at your finished sketch of Levi leaning against the doorframe of the break room.

Doing things for yourself has never felt so good.

I'm adding my taglist to this bc I'm actually quite proud of this one?

-> taglist: @averysmolbear @humanitys-strongest-bamf @youre-ackermine @notgoodforlife @roseofdarknessblog @missamity @levis-squishy-cheeks @icansmellsouls @dkbktk420 @elnyrae @romantichomicide95 @sckerman @secretmoneybearvoid @apolloshaiku @sujiroses @jadam724 @kamyru @highgoon69 @missyasma @nube55 @svftackerman

The link to my taglist is in my pinned post on my blog!!

[meditating-dog-lover]

Anti-inflammatory diet - being in charge of our own health

I've been following an anti-inflammatory diet for almost a month.

I did expenses recently and was happy I did not eat out a lot recently. I only had some mozzarella sticks at work the other day.

I feel so much better. My skin has improved from this alone. The diet won't get rid of the fungal infections (I'll need actual topical medication for that) but it significantly reduced my skin inflammation. Not 100% though, but a good amount. The aloe juice (also anti-inflammatory and is great for the gut) and steroids helped too. Killing the infection will also help reduce inflammation.

The next real goal I have is stress management, getting the support I need for my autism diagnosis (testing + longterm support), and hormone balancing pertaining to my cortisol, estrogen, progesterone, and insulin levels (as someone who struggles with anxiety, I do have normal-high cortisol). I'm in good health thankfully, and my diet helped a lot. But my anxiety/stress management, autism testing and support, and hormone balancing will be what really helps me next. I'll get help from a psychologist for the autism testing and support, and my doctor can help me with hormone balancing.

I've been on steroids for 4 days. Along with my diet, it helped a lot with my inflammation. However today I went out to go shopping with my mom and sister, and I got exhausted and overwhelmed. And I argued with my mom and brother (nothing serious, family arguments happen). So I got tense and stress and felt some itchiness. That's why relaxing and calming down are just as important as diet and steroids. I'm okay now, I just hate going out in public places when I want to rest at home. I remember as a child going to this grocery store with my mom and dad every weekend and would feel so overwhelmed and drained. It's one thing if I want to go somewhere, and a completely different and draining thing when I have to go with someone else while they are shopping and I get so bored and overwhelmed. It's usually clothes shopping with my mom and Home Depot or something like that with my dad. I'm okay now thankfully.

I'm definitely craving a lot of healthy stuff now. I love drinking green tea, eating fruit and veggies and olive oil and avocados. I do allow myself to eat out on Fridays, and I felt bloated and drained from that alone. I got some coffee and a caramel chocolate block, and I even felt like the chocolate was too sweet. I might look into 80% cocoa in the future, and I love chocolate and have 72%. But anything higher is usually harder to find. I ordered a healthy salad today with olive oil dressing rather than the usual stirfry pasta. Pasta is not the problem, I actually really like it. The problem is the processed inflammatory oils they cook and season it with. Olive oil is very anti-inflammatory and is a great option along with avocado and coconut oil.

I've been really into matcha green tea recently. I love drinking coffee, though I know tea is probably better and more anti-inflammatory and won't make me crash. I felt pretty bloated today, and I think it started after I had my coffee. I went out today to get clothes with my mom and sister and felt big and ballooned. I guess sometimes it just happens. I know I've been concerned with general digestion and nutrient absorption. I've started chewing more and I'm drinking aloe juice for intestinal lining support (I've been taking something before that to help me out but am drinking aloe now). I wanted to focus on stomach acid levels and pancreatic enzyme production, because not enough acid and enzymes can negatively impact digestion and nutrient absorption. Maybe I can ask my doctor about this? Again I'm tired of taking supplements and the last thing I want to do is get a new supplement with HCl and a new one with enzymes. There has to be a better way to approach this beyond expensive pills. I know h pylori can influence stomach acidity, and I had h pylori. And sometimes the pancreas doesn't produce enough enzymes. Or the liver doesn't produce enough bile to absorb fat soluble vitamins. It's a headache to sift through all this and to buy a ton of supplements, but I can find little and easy to follow things that can help. Even ginger tea can help. I know tropical fruit contain natural enzymes, but unfortunately I'm not a fan of tropical fruit. I'm more of a berry person.

So I'm going to wait until my fungal infection disappears, and I finish my steroid course tomorrow. The next goal is to talk to my doctor about hormone balancing, schedule the autism testing appointment, and read a bit about digestive/absorption support in the context of stomach acid and enzymes. I want to be in control of my health, I do not want doctors to be in control because they're going to make fear mongering decisions for me, or even unhelpful ones, and I'm going to feel scared and vulnerable and inclined to listen to them because they are the "authorities" and we hold them to a high standard. But sometimes we just know ourselves and our bodies better. I know I do. But the trick is to follow and stick to these healthy habits, otherwise we cannot rely on our own conclusions and decisions. There have been several moments in my life where my own family was more helpful. It was my mom who helped me a lot with my skin, my dad introduced me to intermittent fasting, and my mom and sister suspected that I might be autistic after going to therapy for almost 2 years and my therapist never mentioning anything about it being a possibility.

I know I feel like I'm not up to that level or standard yet because my skin inflammation was a constant reminder of how behind and sick I felt. I know I had some inflammatory issues pertaining to my diet and gut and I've improved my diet and followed a gut healing protocol, and now I drink aloe juice to maintain my gut health. I know stress contributes to it as well, along with possible hormonal imbalances related to my stress. Even things out of my control like the weather and environment, as well as hidden infections that can weaken my immune system. My skin is much better now, I just need to address the stress and hormonal side to all this. And I'll look into reading about stomach acid and enzymes for optimal digestion/nutrient absorption, but without the headache of supplements.

I will heal. I don't need people to be in control of my health just because it's their job. I need guidance and feedback, but not final decision making. That should be my job, but I need to be proactive in order for that to be a possibility.

[thatfailedpokemontrainer]

Pelipper mail!

[Oh! It's a letter from Polaris!]

“Dear Sprite, Beedrill, and Tari

So so so sorry this letter is late. We finally resolved the Walrein situation. Unfortunately…well, the pod will only accept Wallace as the leader of their pod, so I’m going to have to leave him to stay at the shelter. He’ll be fine, he was getting bored at the house, but I’m sure he’ll miss his daily Beedrill inspections. Skie got it in xer head that I should do an interview on the main sanctuary account while I’m in town, so it looks like its going to be another week. My work never stops it seems! Ah well.

Sprite: ….I’m going to be honest Sprite, I’m not exactly delighted by that news. You. Told Kittsu to leave and she did. That’s not great! That’s super not great actually! Just- fucking dist Sprite. I’m not. mad. A smidge frustrated but not mad.

….I hope your outing was fun, and that you feel better soon. Make sure youre drinking water and eating regular meals and getting enough sleep. Please take care of yourself, bubs.

Beedrill: Your support in my caring for Bird means everything to me Beedrill. This week she got to pet more Spheals and ride (very safely) on a snowmobile. She says it was very loud but a bit cool. Matcha has been banned, but she does enjoy mochi.

As for service pokemon. The main reason for keeping service pokemon and battling pokemon separate, is specifically in the case of medical alert and task pokemon. For example, if Orion was a battler and I was battling with him, if I started having problems with my heart, he would be too distracted by the battle and wouldn’t be able to alert me to sit and calm down, or fetch my medicine. Or if I had a panic attach while he was battling, he may not notice and be able to task to help me out of it. That’s the main reason for not having a pokemon do both. It’s possible to have a service pokemon also be able to battle, but it’s a bit frowned upon for those reasons. It really depends on what tasks the pokemon will be trained to do to help you out. If you’d like, it’s something we can discuss at length when I get home. I would be happy to train a service pokemon for you if that was something you wanted.

Tari: Glad that Corro is keeping Jester in check haha. And I’m especially happy to hear that you and Delta have made up! Good job kicking its ass at air hockey, much respect. I used to be quite good at air hockey in my college days…perhaps we should battle it out to see who’s the best when I come home, yeah? I appreciate your thanks, but it is unneeded. You are always welcome in my home Tari, no matter what.

Lots of love for you not kids

-Polaris and Bird”

[A letter is returned, later than usual]

Hello Professor. I was glad when your letter arrived, Sprite had got it in his head that something bad had happened to you and we both enjoyed this letter. I will miss Wallace, Admittedly, I do wish I had some of his DNA and a small laboratory to study him and come to my own conclusion on weather he was a dual typed pokemon, or a fraud. I hope he finds peace at the sanctuary. In your next letter I would like to know how bird is doing, as not hearing from her directly has made me rather on edge. Could you please include an excerpt from her in the next letter. Tell her she doesn't need to write in cursive, or use code name, just something, even a drawing would be good. I will think over the service pokemon thing. Theres nothing wrong with me to a diagnosable extent. I don't think giving a service pokemon out to someone who doesn't need one would be the best course of action. Maybe a normal pokemon would do just fine. I have been hanging out more with your green haired friend. It's interesting. I have a couple more observations, but i'll spesify them when I have more evidence to back them up.

----

Hi proffesor :o

I've got a gift for youuuuuu when you come back!! I won you some stuff at the arcade- we spent all of our tickets on it but I think it will be worth it

Also what are your fav colours, I've been bracelet making recently and feel like making something for you and sprite, based on one of its favourite songss~

And also I am the reneinging champion of air hockey, but thats just because everyones too scared to take me on since i keep hitting peoples fingers.

Have a good week proffesor. Hear from you soon. Beedrill

Tari

Sprite.

[cerissy]

something about yesterday

i like errand days, sometimes.

yesterday, my partner cory and i went to have brunch at the neighborhood pancake house. he was making it up to me for sleeping in until 5:30 pm the day before (yes it was ridiculous - we didn't get any chores done). the clouds that hung over the city gave a constant threat of a rainy day. when we got to the restaurant, it was busy, and the food was mid, but the coffee was just how i like it. something about that was so comforting. it was about finding comfort in simple things amidst the general discomfort and inconvenience of it all. one of my profs in grad school once said that the mundane can be a portal to the sacred. and it's true. magic is everywhere, even in your morning coffee.

after that, we went to a japanese cosmetics store (tokyo no beauty). this was unplanned. yesterday was supposed to be about brunch and grocery shopping, but i asked to go to tokyo no beauty on a whim. cory agreed to drive us there, and there i got an oil cleanser, vitamin c essence, and hair mask that were all over tiktok 😋 the impulse shop gave me a dopamine hit and cory commented on how i became so much more energetic after the stop at the cosmetics store lol

we also happened to walk by a complex which was supposed to have a hidden coffee shop. we tried looking for a secret entrance but could not find it. it was like a side quest that hadn't been unlocked! i found amusement in being unable to locate a secret coffee shop, because if it was a secret coffee shop, it should stay a secret. at least from me, at this time.

we headed to the asian grocery store for some kimchi, soba noodle dip, and some kitchen supplies. i was frustrated and overwhelmed as usual because it was so crowded and i could not find furikake. i ALWAYS get overwhelmed at asian grocery stores. it gets very crowded and the shelves are often too close together. after being unable to find furikake and fuji salad dressing, i gave up, we paid, and left.

after expressing my frustration with asian grocery stores, cory calmed me down by holding my hand and suggesting that we check out the korean bakery near where we parked. they sell pastry that i really like, something they call mammoth bread. we ended up getting matcha donuts instead of that, and then we drove to the grocery store where we did most of our shopping.

the grocery store was as normal as it could be, which is perfect. normal is good, familiar, comforting. no surprises. we got what we needed for dinner (beef stew). cory wanted milk tea after shopping, but i didn't, so he went to order milk tea while i walked around the pharamacy and bought drugstore makeup. i accidentally spent more on that than actual groceries 😐

apparently cory's bestfriend was waving at us somewhere sometime during the day. we did not see him, and cory thought it was funny. his friend said "i didn't say hi because i didn't want to interrupt your date" to which cory replied, "dude we were just grocery shopping!"

we got home, put the groceries away, and then we ate our donuts. it was cory's turn to cook so he started making beef stew, so i went into the bedroom to watch a korean drama (celebrity) while waiting. soon after that, it was dinner time, then i cleaned the kitchen, and then i binged the kdrama until 2 am 🤭

something about yesterday was perfect. it wasn't perfect, but it was. it probably wasnt the same for cory because i know he would rather stay home or hang out with his friends. i just like slow days with the right amount of adventure and disappointments and surprises. there was no rush, and we could afford to stop and be curious about a hidden coffee shop or a bakery. we safely returned home, stocked up the fridge, had a comfortable bed waiting for me. it's a reminder of a simple and safe privileged life that i will always be grateful for.

i could go on and on. as simple as my life may be, simple is extravagant these days, and life is never guaranteed. i hold onto these things right now while i am still alive 💖

[mythoughtsbysms]

Date Plans

Do not repost this post. This is my original work.

Sunday Morning

It’s 7:00 am and you woke up to your alarm going off. The room was warmer than usual because you decided to close the window since it was raining badly the night before and didn't want water going into your room. It was foggy outside and you decided to get up and open the curtains all the way and open up the window to let some fresh air into the room. 

You grabbed your phone and went into your kitchen to make yourself a honey latte since you really liked it yesterday. You made yourself peanut butter toast with some banana slices and strawberries with a couple of hard-boiled eggs. You sat down on the couch and opened up your phone to see if anyone texted you during the night. You saw a notification that Matt has texted you very late last night, you were asleep at this point. 

Matt: Hey Y/N! Sorry for the late text. I wanted to make sure you are okay and say I'm sorry about the kiss tonight. I didn’t want to come off pushing or trying to rush things since we are now getting to know each other. I understand if you don't want to go on with our friendship. I want to make sure you are happy and feel respected. 

Y/N: Hey Matt! I’m seeing your text now. I was asleep when you sent your text. You didn't do anything wrong! I appreciate that you wanted to make sure I felt respected. I was worried that I did something wrong. You left so quickly. Are you doing okay? Of course, I still want to be friends with you. You're really cool and sweet. 

Matt: Hey. Yes, I am doing alright. I’m happy that you want to continue our friendship. I really enjoy spending my time with you. You're an amazing woman and I’m grateful to have you as my friend. 

Y/N: Aww... I’m grateful that you are my friend too!

You were so happy that you both are on the same page and communicated what was going on on both sides. After you were done eating, you went and got dressed so you can run some errands. You wanted to go to Blick’s art store to purchase some Prismacolor color pencils, some Copic markers, bristol paper, and a couple sketchbooks. You also needed to stop by the store to pick up some groceries and flowers. Flowers make you happy because they are calm and feel as if they have a personality of their own. [ Your favorite flower(s) ] is/are your favorite. 

Errands

While you were getting ready, you picked out an outfit. You are wearing black flare pants, a loosely fitted cream sweatshirt, a black beanie, a loosely fitted black shirt jacket, and a pair of black ankle-height UGGs. Once ready, you grab your water and stopped by the local coffee shop to get yourself a matcha latte with honey and went to go Blick’s. 

While shopping at Blick’s, you were picking out some colors from the Prismacolor pencil section thinking about texting Matt to see what he is doing but decided not to because he could be busy and you didn’t want to disrupt him from his work. You went on the purchase the supplies you needed and wanted and went to the grocery store. Before you left, you wrote down what you needed because you planned on baking more treats since you and Matt ate the other ones up. 

Whole Foods List:

Fruits: organic honeycrisp apple and avocado.

Vegetables: organic cucumber and baby romaine lettuce.

Pantry: 100% organic cacao powder, 100% organic cacao bar, canned pumpkin puree (2), canned refried beans (3), and organic peanut butter.

Dairy/Dairy Alternative: soy milk (2).

Misc: flowers for the kitchen table.

You got what you needed from the grocery store and walked home. Luckily, it wasn’t raining outside, so nothing got wet from the rain. When you got home, you put everything away and took care of the flowers. The flowers were [ your favorite flower ] and looked amazing on the kitchen table. I made the space look complete. Now that everything has been taken care of, you made yourself a classic peanut butter and homemade raspberry jam sandwich with some chips on the side. It’s simple but it was good. Sometimes, having something simple hits the spot, especially on a busy day. 

 A few hours later, you were relaxing on the couch eating a snack, and watching some [ your favorite genre of videos ] on YouTube on TV when Matt texts you.

Matt: Hey Y/N! I wanted to see how you were doing. You’ve been on my mind all day. 

Y/N: Hey! I’m doing alright. I’ve run some errands earlier and now I’m watching YouTube on TV while eating a snack. What’s going on?

Matt: Cool. Nothing much just been working on some music for an upcoming single. May I ask you something?

Y/N: Oh cool! Of course, what’s up?

Matt: I know we just met and started becoming friends but, I was wondering if I can take you out to dinner sometime? I’ve been developing feelings for you and wanted to take you out but wanted to take it slowly so you didn’t feel rushed.

Y/N: Matt, I would love to go on a date with you! What date and time were you thinking?

Matt: Awesome! I was thinking before my tour starts (January 27th) since I’ll be busy with music for the next couple of weeks. How about January 20th at 5:30 pm? 

Y/N: *checks calendar* Yes, that should work!

Matt: Great! See you January 20th at 5:30 pm! I’ll pick you up.

Y/N: Perfect! I’m looking forward to seeing you.

Matt: Me too. :)

You spent the rest of the night watching TV and relaxing, You went to bed with butterflies and love in your stomach. You were so excited but the date is a month away. You wrote on your to-do list things you need to get done prior to the date to help make the days fly by quicker. 

[boycigs]

IM ON MY WAY !

bibi's note; intoxication, rushed growing up, making out. yes, bibi just got matcha and is making a coffee. this reminds me of breakfast at tiffany's,,,

"don't wanna leave.." the blonde beauty muttered, pupils wide, her eyes glazed over and tired. a sigh left bibiyana's fatigued body, her black acrylic's gripped harder into his shirt and back.

she drags the joint to her plump lips to take a hit, soon passing it to her lover as he sucked in, inhaling the smoke.

"...i gotta go see blitzo, i practically spent the whole day with you omi. not that 'm complainin' though..." she trailed off while his rough hands hooked under her top and rubbed her sides. a feeble attempt to calm her down, but with no prevail she was still visibly upset.

she leaned back, loosening her embrace as her smaller fists pounded lightly on his chest. he laughed at her pout. "why. aren't. you. helping. me. decide ?"

takeomi grabbed her hands, as he exhaled. staring into her warm brown eyes. "doll, ya gotta decide for yourself, make decisions, etcetera etcetera."

she let his words in, let them melt and make an inprint into her mind. why ? why should she have to make a decision ? she's been making decisions for herself since she could speak. thinking about what was in her best interest, and if it wasn't, well. that's something to learn from, albeit the hard way.

"don't wanna omi," at this point her words were slurring together as she spoke. "can't ya' do it f'me ? can't'cha make my decisions."

alas, making her decisions for her would strip her of her personality, one of the best things he liked about her.

takeomi thought about it. she did make comments about it with him: having to grow up to fast, she made remarks like she has a sibling but never delved further than a mention of him.

"well" he paused, letting his words reach her and catch her attention before continuing. "I can call the kid, let him know you're here."

he posed the favor, his eyes roaming over her to see any reaction. "..." she opened her mouth, full sentences coming to mind but not being spoken she chooses to write the words in his skin. 'sure'

she gave him a goofy smile, letting her heavy lids fall after handing her phone to him.

Lets go back, 13 hours should be enough.

10am.

'maybe it's burnout ?' she questioned herself as currently she couldn't get up. she had no strength or energy to force herself to get up mentally in addition to physically.

but, she had to do something, she called the first person to come to mind. she remembered his words. "hey, love" he started before leaving a few gentle bites on her shoulder, pleased that she felt relaxed in his hold. "if you need me I'm only a call away, alright ?"

takeomi akashi, a man she had gotten to know quite well as of recent.

[Now Calling: takeomi <3 ]

she called out softly, thereafter hearing the phone pickup. "hii, takeomi !"

"hm ? oh g'mornin' doll" his morning voice slightly raspy, though she could hear papers being shuffeled and several men arguing in the background, worrying her.

"omi, am i interrupting something ?"

"no, yer not. how'd you come to that idea love ?" his abundance of petnames messing with her more then she'd like.

she spoke of the yelling she could hear from his call and he just told it off as noisy coworkers. including his brother.

"oh, anyway omi," she struggled forcing the words out of her mouth. giving help to others was like her autopilot function. why was this. so. goddamn diffucult ?

"c.. could you, mm, would you come over and help me ?" now, with that kind of question akashi had no idea what to expect. she asked for help but for what ?

"hold for a second bibi." her chest fluttered with the most delusional idea, that he's already making way to her place.

"hey, mikey !" he slipped back into the meeting room, covering his phone. nobody reacting to his presence, just as if he never left.

"yes ?" the bonten leader answered right back with his dead, uninterested stare.

"may I take the rest of day off ?" he asked, for once in a millenia.

"sure, g'bye," and he was sent off without a second thought, although there was a new one. 'maybe I can go get a coffee f'her ?'

"omi ? what's up ? the noise died down." her warm sweet voice always made him feel loved no matter what she said. except for the time she yelled, pushing him outta the kitchen when they tried to cook together. 'VEN IZ MOJE KUHINJE, SEM GA !!!'

he internally laughed remembering the accent she pulled out when she spoke, in her mother tongue too. translating to 'get out of my kitchen, I got it !!!' although they were in his apartment the whole time. "hey darling. do you want some coffee ? I'm nearing your fave café and I could stop in."

que high-school girl squeals. "I'll take that as a yes, darling. I'll be there soon. bye, mwah."

a matcha, pastry and denied phone number later, akashi was at his lovers apartment. 'bzzt, bzzt'

"comin,," bibi yelled trudging her feet across the floor in her saggy white socks, "thanks omi." embracing him in a lousy hug upon opening the door.

"don't worry about it pretty," as he left a delicate kiss on the crown of her head, he continued trying not to step on her cat. "have you eaten anything ?"

"substantial ? nope !" she took a bite of her pastry, letting the powdered sugar fall to the ground.

"hmm, fine I'll cook for you then, let's see." takeomi tests the waters as he moves around her kitchen. unapproved of her almost empty fridge containing coffee beans, butter, a jar of jam, cream and one (1) takeout container.

"love, I know you can cook, what's... this ?" she looks up from the couch, and replies with no thought.

"I need groceries. have no energy to do so, but I gotta get 'em, promised tora I'd cook him today, help me up ?"

he sighed, but came over and grabbed her forearm to pull her up. "I'm gonna make my coffee, would you mind choosin' my outfit ?"

he caught her eyes, giving her an incredulous 'for real' stare. "yeah go ahead, I trust you." she went back to putting the grinded beans into her moka pot.

'oh well' takeomi thought, wandering to her bedroom. after looking through her wardrobe he pulled out: a pair of low rise cargos, a camisol and a light hoodie along with some accessories.

step step step step step ste-

"omi !!! my coffee's done, let's see what you pulled ou- ooooh !!! cute !" bibyana fawned over the outfit he put together as he backed up. "thanks~ I'll be ready soon. you can fix a coffee if you'd like !"

and so he did, being fed up with whatever bonten nonsense he had to deal with periodically. he sat at her tiny, seeminly second hand, kitchen table. opening the window to light a smoke. 'wow, does this look familiar..'

bibyana mused at his mug as she came back in the room. "black coffee ?" he let out a short chuckle at her question. "yep, have you ever had it ?"

he glanced up, his train of thought dissapearing as he saw her. "lovely, let's get going shall we ?" he snuffed out his cigarette and set his mostly empty mug in the sink.

"grocery shopping !!! but bye toasty" she whispered to the cat stretching over the ottoman near the balcony. soaking upthe sun "thanks for coming, takeomi. not sure what happened but I feel a bit better already."

takeomi caught her gaze, sincerity filling his being. "don't worry about it," he took her hand, leaving a soft kiss before moving to her face, a smooch on her forehead, one on her nose and lastly her lips. just raw passion being expressed.

"whenever you call, I'm on my way to you love."

[united-as-one]

The imugi was very familiar with the different scents when it came to different dragons and since this one wasn't one of those that would be trying to figure out how to break his neck, he was okay to keep calm, just making a mental note it was good Feen had taken the month off to do some underwater things. A hand rested against their cheek, the tray pushed under the arm while he was looking at the other. "If you are undecided about what to get from the menu, I could just surprise you with something. Not all customers like it but I am happy to bring you some of my favorites." Micha was standing close enough to hear this one comfortably, the last he needed was for a dragon to mock him because the hearing was shit on land at a great distance.

While not the usual café that Yubin would stay in, the writer loved seeing new places through which he could find a muse to write in and this establishment was no different. Small and quainter than his other coffee stops, this café had a very unique flair to it part of which was the waiter and who he assumed was the owner or one of the owners but he could smell the scent on him. Imugi, an intriguing species for sure. While many of the dragons hunted down these sea serpents and vice verse, Yubin himself did not share that sentiment and wanted the relationships between them to be better, sweeter.

But as the waiter spoke, the dragon smiles and nods before asking, "I think I'll have a matcha latte. Do you guys have fruit toast as well? I didn't have breakfast today yet and am just a little bit hungry." He asks gently. "Oh and before you go, my name's Lim Yubin. I always tell people who I am just in case I become a regular, i tend to always be around coffee shops anyway."

He was unsure as to whether the barista and waiter knew of who he was. Ever since Yubin had been freed from his mountain prison he had taken upon himself to become a writer, and had written quite a few well known books that had turned him into a literary celebrity in some circles. He much preferred them not to know, just so he could focus on his writing whenever he was out and about but Yubin enjoyed the attention either way. "You smell great by the way, I like the scent." He says with a chuckle and smile before typing away.

[deathofpeaceofmiiind]

high infidelity | thirteen

Aquamarine, moonlight swimming pool...what if all I need is you? *Ellie's POV* I woke up to the sound of the hotel door opening up. Noah appeared immediately with two coffees in his hands and the softest smile on his face when he saw I was awake. My heart fluttered as I saw him, I don’t think I’ll ever have a normal reaction to seeing him. He was wearing gym shorts, his Canucks hat he bought after the game last night and one of his band t-shirts, and he made it all look so damn good. He put his AirPods away and walked over to me with my coffee. “I would’ve got you a matcha, but I figured you’d needed something a little stronger.” “This is perfect, thank you.” I mused before he kissed my cheek. I took a small sip of my coffee and realized he got me a caramel macchiato, my second favourite. “Did you enjoy yourself last night?” “Absolutely.” he replied with a grin, rubbing his hand on my thigh. “I liked the post game show more though.”

“Yeah, that was…” My voice trailed as I looked over at him, remembering what happened. My mouth went dry as my entire body began to tingle. “I’m sorry that I needed a break, it’s been a while for me.” “Don’t be.” He replies as he leaned over to kiss me. “Just means I did my job.” I rolled my eyes, I could tell he was basking in his accomplishments from last night. Noah ordered us room service before he went to go take a shower so I drank my coffee as I scrolled on my phone. I stopped when I saw Tyler sent me a lengthy text. “Fine, you win. Your lawyer will contact you next week for our court date. I’m going to go live with my parents until everything is done so you can go back to the house today. Start looking for your own place though cause I want to put our house on the market as soon as possible. I’m keeping Liam until your next rotation at work is done. I will drop him off at daycare next Thursday and then you can pick him up. I’m still sorry about everything.” “Okay.” I didn’t want to argue with him, all I wanted was for this done and over with. I quickly texted my manager and said I needed to be on stress leave for the month. There was no way I could work in this state. I put my phone down and just sighed. Suddenly I heard Noah lightly singing something in the shower, I didn’t know what it was but it sounded angelic. I lied back down on the bed and just listened to him. There’s just something about his voice that resets my entire nervous system. “With your boots beneath my bed …forever is the sweetest con” I smirked… he’s a swiftie. A few moments later Noah came out of the bathroom and I almost choked on my own spit. He had on a pair of tan Lululemon jersey shorts with a black Lord of the Rings T-shirt. Seriously…how does he make casual clothes look that good? “So…Cowboy like me?” “Oh, you heard me.” He bashfully replied, his face flushed pink. I shrugged my shoulders, “I just never expected you to like Taylor Swift.” “Are you kidding me? Evermore was the reason I wanted to do an unplugged album.” He exclaimed as he went to grab our room service that just arrived. I bit my lip, he was too perfect.

“So Tyler texted me while you were showering.” I said as we sat down to have our breakfast. Noahs jaw clenched and I grabbed his hand to calm him down. “It’s a good thing. He basically said he’s not gonna fight it but I do have to find somewhere to live as soon as possible.” “I’ll come help you look for an apartment.” Noah suggests as he takes a sip of his coffee, “If you need to stay in hotel for the time being I can set it up for you.”

“Thank you but Tyler is staying with his parents until we put the house up for sale. I can stay with Danielle if I have to but I’ll start looking tonight.” I replied as I analyzed Tyler’s lengthy text message.

“I’m here every step of the way.“ He expressed as he gave my hand an assuring squeeze. I half smiled, trying to wrap my head around this.

“I’m sorry I’m putting you through this.” I replied, feeling equal parts defeated and guilty. Noah lifted my hand and gently kissed it, sending me the most sympathetic stare. Someone needs to pinch me cause this still doesn’t feel real, he doesn’t feel real. 

“Ellie, you’re worth all of this okay?” He assures me, “I’m not going anywhere, I promise.”

I just nodded cause I could feel tears filling my eyes. I took a deep breath but couldn’t stop the guilt from clouding my mind. Just a short few days ago Noah didn’t know who I was and was living his life perfectly fine. I had to come in and fuck it all up for him with my problems. Noah grazed my neck before he lifted my chin with his thumb. I stared into his somber eyes as he wiped the tears I couldn’t fight back anymore.

“When do you have to leave?” I asked changing the subject.

“Next show is tomorrow night, so either tonight or tomorrow morning. I’m just waiting for Matt to text me flight details.” he replied, meeting me with sad eyes. “We only have a week left so I’ll be back when everything is done.”

“I wish I could go with you.” I pouted, hoping that me joking would keep the tears at bay. I never had a problem being alone but the idea of being this alone was foreign to me. I selfishly wanted Noah around me every second of every day. I didn’t feel like eating anymore so I sat down on the bed as Noah tapped away on his phone. I watched him, begging for some kind of response from him but he was still typing on his phone. He finally put his phone away and turned his attention back to me.

“Hypothetically…when would you need to be home?”

“Wednesday night.” I replied with a raised eyebrow. Noah knelt down in front of me and reached for my hands. I sometimes forgot how tall he was cause he was still eye level with me despite being on his knees. I stared down at his hands that were tangled in mine, still not having the courage to look at him. “Ellie, come with me.”

“Really?” I gasped as finally met his gaze. He just smirked at me as I tried to find the words to say, but I was speechless.

“I may or may not have texted Matt to change my flight so we can go together. We’re going to be in Vegas tomorrow so it’ll be a good place to take your mind off things. We’ll get our own room, you can come to the show, then after we can gamble or drink a lot and bitch about how awful Tyler is…whatever you want.“

“Why are you doing this Noah?” I sighed. I had this overwhelming feeling that I was becoming such a burden to him. He was uprooting his tour routine for me and getting on more flights than he needed to. I know we had this incredible connection but it felt like a lot of effort on his end.

“How honest do you want me to be?” He answered, tucking the hair that fell in front of his eyes. 

“Like your life depends on it.”

“Ellie, I…I’m really fucking scared of how much I care for you already. Those few hours where I thought I lost you for good were absolute torture. My mind is telling me I’m coming off too strong and I need to back off but I’m sorry, I can’t” he stopped to catch his breath and fight the tears forming in his eyes. “You deserve to know how it feels to be truly loved, and I want to be the man to do it.”

He looked down at the ground and I sat there in disbelief at what he just said to me. No words were escaping me, all I could do was get on the floor and give him a hug. His arms immediately pulled me closer to him. My body was fighting every urge to tell him I loved him. I know it’s too soon to have feelings this deep but I was overwhelmed with emotion.  

“Do you need to do anything today?” Noah asks as he closes up his suitcase.

“I should go to the house to change and pack some stuff for tomorrow.” I sighed, dreading going back to the house. “Also maybe pick up my car, I can leave it at the airport.” “Do you want me to come with you?” “I don’t know.” I confessed crossing my arms, “Tyler said the house was empty but I don’t want to take any chances. I’ll be quick”

“Works for me.” He replies as he puts on a few sprays of his cologne. The smell reaches my nose, fuck he smells so good. “Since we have a free afternoon, where is the one place in this city you’d take a tourist?”

I pursed my lips, “Oh! The aquarium!”

He looks over at me and smiles. If there was in thing in this life I’ll always be sure of, is that I wanted to see that smile every day from now on.