#3. could just be a neat thing to have if i DO write fics in the future

[lightningflvsh]

hello followers on my semi-inactive blog. can someone talk me out of doing hours of research in order to build my own timeline/canon rewrite of the dc comics universe because i’ve been filled with an Urge to do just that and i don’t know if my motivation issues can take it

[aidensolas]

STORED DATABASE (1) - A Forsaken Fic

Heya so I decided to keep writing as the conclusion I reached was just people being people like to ruin things that other people like due to hate. I want to say I might be distancing myself away from knowing about these types of things and just focus on what makes me happy. Enjoy the chapter!

Okay so you already pinched yourself 3 times and it seems like you aren't waking up so it's probably a lucid dream.

Anyways you might be wondering what's happening? Right John Doe and Elliot sitting neatly on your bed as John Doe looks at Elliot confused and staring at your figure he shrugs and looks around commenting on your room "Nice Room... for a runt." You held out your hand in a pointing motion and pointed it at John Doe which he responded to holding up his hands well... a hand and a spike up in a defeated motion "Can't take a playful 'poke'..." He said in a joking manner "So uhm... Hey? Where are we exactly?" Elliot suddenly piped in as you thought about the situation what's happening right now as you paced back and forth between the door of your room.

Okay so you might be wondering what exactly happened after they appeared in your bedroom? Well, I'm your mind! Here to recount things you never needed to remember again... So as they appeared in your room a series of silly events happened that involved John Doe trying to murder you and Elliot which was scary in itself then suddenly as he tried to pierce your stomach with his giant spike he suddenly got flung into the wall of your bedroom knocking down some shelves and cabinets full of your precious well... Whatever you keep in those as you were more scared about your home you realized the things once destroyed started to rearrange itself in a neat manner not knowing what to do you made up a bluff that no one can do anything in this house without your permission and if you break a rule you immediately get punished via getting ragdolled into walls which to your Suprise both Elliot and John Doe believed so now they're both setting on your bed.

Back to the current time! As you completely ignored Elliot's questioned (Rude.) "So where are you guys from and how did you guys exactly... Arrive here?" You asked not like you didn't know already you just thought that having prior information about them without them knowing who you are is weird so might as well keep the appearance that you don't know them.

"Ask the twerp beside me." John Doe nudged Elliot beside him "I can barely remember anything besides killing them over and over again." To which Elliot replied with a nervous laugh as John Doe nudged him "Well! About that it's uh... Hard to explain if you can give me some tim-" You raised your hand in front of Elliot before he could ramble on "No need. You don't need to explain if you aren't ready yet... Anyways would you kindly lea-" You got interrupted as well. Karma's a bitch ain't it? You heard the door open behind you as you quickly looked to turn around to see someone peeking in, wait is that Noob?... Dear God.

Okay you tap your foot in hurry as you paced around your main living room which was enough to accommodate the whole Forsaken cast including the out of place Mafioso who just randomly decided to show up despite being a variation skin of c00lkidd. Chance piped up seeing you walking around the room in a hurry as a coping mechanism of how your life is ruined now. "Hey... Uh your name whatever mind you settle down?" Okay you gather your thoughts and say down sighing as Builderman started to talk "This might be stressful and surprising to see various people you don't know inside your home and people with alarming looks to top it off of." he said as he discreetly looked at killers who were surprisingly not murdering anyone at the moment not like they can but you're surprised an attempt hasn't been made considering some things. "But we mean no harm and we would like to not bother you but when we tried to leave the front door a random pop-up would appear saying that we don't have access to do so. Would you happen to know anything about it?" Then Shedletsky decided to squeeze in a comment that's stated in a lighthearted joking manner "Who would wanna leave anyway have you seen this house?" Builderman replied by quickly stomping on his foot which made him wince as he grumbled "Okay... Okay... I get it." You squeeze your eyes shut as you cover your face with your hands as you resist the urge to cry into them. "I tried it as well. It said I can't open the door for at least another 7 days. First things first who are you guys." Yeah, you aren't asking them you were demanding an answer.

As they all introduced each other you quickly gave them their own lodgings and places to stay good thing you have a lot... Well, more than enough guest rooms to accommodate them since it was relatively late anyway you were preparing to sleep before you felt a tap behind you which revealed to be Dussekar "In my own lair, where dreams take flight, can I wield the brush to color my night?" What is bro saying? You thought about it for a second then realized he meant if he could decorate his own room to which you replied to "Go ahead it's all yours anyway for the time being." He nodded promptly before slowly floating away into his own room and closing the door. This is going to be a long week.

After waking up and feeling shit like always you decided to do your daily routine and as you leave your room you see Chance on the side of your door as you stumbled upon him he immediately takes your hand into his and drags you somewhere "Hey you never told me you had this." He said with a chuckle "Had what?" He then reaches a door to which he opens which reveals a whole ass casino. Wait... What. The. Hell. "Right and in case you forgot the name's Chance the best gambler you'll ever see." He said with pride as he closed his eyes striked a cool pose and flipped a coin the coin landed it rolling tails did make it a bit silly, but you won't ruin his day so you didn't mention it as he hid the coin, you nervously laughed to see people working inside the casino yet no other gamblers or people are present. "Yeah... I totally had this since the start, but you never asked, nor do we totally know each other... Haha.haha." to which then Chance looks back at you saying " That's fair but... Wanna go round all the people up and have a nice fun day in the casino? Well, it's yours so it wouldn't be a problem to treat us, right?" You never owned a casino, so you have no idea, but you felt like you were about to faint but, you gave Chance a giant totally not fake smile. "Sure, go ahead! Go call them up I'll treat all of you to some fun." Chance wasted no time bolting out the door and probably waking everyone up to drag them into this. You glanced at one of the workers who noticed you and it seemed to be the same people who you would see in a Roblox game but humanized or some sort... The worker stared at you and waved giving a small smile. Yeah.

This is definitely going to be a long week.

Notes:

Guys I'm sick so I couldn't promise the bulk of chapters I've written but most of it is done anyway so expect day by day and a random two-time x reader to pop up one day. Excuse my writing if it's on the wobbly side as I said I feel like absolute bunz anyways hope you enjoy this chapter. I wonder what happens next, I totally can't see into the future or anything, but I think it's going to be a casino chapter...

TAGLIST (raaaah)

@brain4stew @yukinaabutlazy @ilikedrinkingsoda @oniadopts @no-hearts-included @haveneulalie

Random note: Why do I feel like John Doe and Builderman would be great at telling Dad Jokes...

[hangesfavles]

Nerd Hange headcanons

4.1k words. AFAB NB loser! hange x bimbo (ish)! fem reader. <3

Summary: Hange is more of a socially inept lesbian redditor gamer nerd rather than a normal ‘i’m smart’ dweeb :). These are general hcs of how you met loser/streamer Hange, things they like and relationship dynamics including you secretly eating them out on stream. <3

A/N: this is my first ever attempt at nsfw so i’m sorry if it’s bad or nondescript! also i know both of my fics so far have been for afab reader, but going forward i plan to write for a genny nootch reader just because i find it to be inclusive to wider groups of hange lovers <3 lol and last time i posted i said i never wrote fanfiction before but that was a tiny fib because i wrote shitty dumpster fire fanfics in middle school, but i’ve /srsly never tried my hand at nsfw before, but i guess there's a first for everything. pls critique me if u have any thoughts but be nice i’m sensitive. also shoutout to @abbyslev for helping me brainstorm <3 if ur reading my fanfics u probably already do, but pleaaaase follow her if u dont she’s lovely!!!! :3

Warnings: Nsfw content under my 2nd divider, sort of exhibitionism and masturbation. Not all of this is nsfw, but I’d still like for MINORS TO DNI. However, I know that you guys like to ignore those warnings, so I bolded the nsfw sections. At the very least, please don’t read the bolded hcs. Thank you & enjoy reading!

❥Loser! Hange who is in the same math course as you. When you walk in on the first day, you’re drawn to them, but not for the reasons you’d initially think. You were almost positive that they would be a decent person to cheat off of. I mean, they seem to look like they know what they’re doing, right?

❥Loser! Hange that can hear their pulse in their ears when they see a pretty girl take the spot beside them. They feel their heart rattling around in their chest as they sneak glances at you whenever they get the chance.

❥Loser! Hange quickly figures out the reason why you decided to sit next to them, rather than the other isolated chairs inside the lecture hall. But don’t worry, of course they’ll let you cheat off of them. Unfortunately, their performance starts to dip a little when they realize what you’re doing. They’re frequently under your gaze, and they can’t help it that you make them nervous :c 

❥Loser! Hange that is unaware that your eyes aren’t only looking down at their answers. One class when you were copying off of them, you started noticing the way their fingers hold their pencil. How slender their digits are, that their nails are surprisingly short, neat and cleaner than expected. You also started to notice how their veins protrude slightly and move up their arm... You feel yourself biting your lip as you observe their side profile. Their cheeks look soft and pink, similarly to their kissable lips. Your eyes continue to trail over their face: their thin, ovular glasses are slightly pushed down on their hooked nose, and their long eyelashes flutter as they continue to take notes beside you.

❥Loser! Hange can’t not listen to you getting called out by the professor when they notice you copying off of your seatmates’ assignments and notes. It was rather embarrassing, but you’re just happy the professor didn’t catch you cheating on an exam and risking academic misconduct.

❥Loser! Hange nudges your arm lightly after that incident, their voice low so you both don’t get caught by the professor. "Hey, um... I've noticed you've been using my notes and uh... answers. Do you need any help with the material? I mean, like, we could study together or something! If you want." They ask you with an excitement in their eyes and voice.

❥Loser! Hange can’t even feel proud of the fact they managed to talk to you because they barely even got that sentence out, and they couldn’t look you in the eye for more than 2 seconds. But it seems like all that is forgotten when you actually agree to meet up with them. They feel a rush of giddiness, but they try not to make a fool of themself in front of you. “Right! Yeah, so here’s my number... We can plan something, er- sometime.” They write their number down, sliding you the ripped end of their notebook page.

❥Loser! Hange who feels their heart in their throat as they lead you into their bedroom. The study session started off a bit rocky and awkwardly, but the tension in the air decreased as time continued on. As much as you would like to actually learn this material to earn good grades, you find yourself wanting to earn their attention much, much more. I mean, you obviously wore your lowest cut shirt and a pleated skirt for a reason. You look up at them, calling out for them. “Hey, Hange?” You ask, smiling as their head shoots up from their notes. “Can you explain this question to me?” You ask quietly, turning around your notebook to face them. You lean closer to them, purposely displaying your breasts for them to (hopefully) ogle.

❥Loser! Hange who starts to feel like they’re being tested by a higher power. They have to physically stop themself from glancing down and making a fool of themself. They try their best to focus on explaining the math problem to you as you watch their every movement like a hawk. You notice their eyes fall on your chest for a split second, and you pounce on your opportunity to tease them further. You reach up to their face, flicking their nose up so they’re forced to look at you. “My eyes are up here, silly.” “I- Uh- Sorry, just-” Hange trips over their words as they try to formulate a cohesive sentence on the spot. “Don’t worry about it, I’m just teasin’. It’s not so bad to be stared at if it's you.” You say with a playful wink.

❥Loser! Hange folds immediately. “O-Oh... Me? Really?” They ask, their eyes widening and pupils dilating. You can’t help but chuckle at their disbelief and nod your head in confirmation. “Yes, you. Is there anybody else in the room with us?” You joke. They stumble over their words as they think of a response. “W-Well, no, there isn’t, but- y’know- I didn’t think you-” They stutter, pushing the notebook aside and gesturing their hands between the two of you. They feel their cheeks growing warmer from embarrassment as they struggle to coherently voice their jumbled thoughts. “You know, you should at least take me to dinner before looking at me like that.” 

❥Loser! Hange doesn’t need to be told twice. They grab your hand with a cheesy smile, practically dragging you to their car while suggesting all sorts of restaurants that you might agree to. “Is there a certain restaurant you had in mind? We can try something totally different, like a little hole-in-the-wall joint. Ooh, but picture this: hibachi. The whole watching people cook in front of me thing usually makes me feel awkward but the food is always soooo good. Oh, or maybe we could go to a steakhouse! No matter what you choose, I’ll be fine with whatever! What do you think?" GOD they are just so excited and you find it utterly adorable. They remained true to their word and took you to whichever place you decided and paid for both of your meals. (They would have done this even if you didn’t joke about it bless their heart.) But then that first date turned into 2 dates, which quickly became 3, 4, 5, then suddenly you both forgot because anything the two of you do together is a date in your minds.

❥Loser! Hange definitely asks you out after only the second date. But in their defense, you’ve been hanging out after class as well as coming over to their house for “study sessions” that alway turned into watching tv or movies, ordering ubereats, going to the movies, walking around their neighborhood, anything but studying. You even took them to a party once. (You guys left after a half hour because Hange got overwhelmed, but you were still happy they tried something for you.) So by the time you guys went on your second “official date” they definitely felt confident that you would say yes.

❥Loser! Hange who loves talking to you about whatever game they’re playing. If it’s a story game, they’d love to explain anything you missed or don’t understand. They also would voice their predictions about how the game will end or where the story will go. If they see something predictable, they’ll definitely tell you what they think will happen, trying to impress you so when/if it does they’ll look “cool” to you. In reality though, you just find them to be geeky in the most endearing way. “Look, there’s a bunch of ammo in this room. If there’s a boss behind this door, you have to give me a kiss.” They say to you with a sly grin on their face. If it’s a PVP game, they will explain everything about what skills and powers each character has and who their favorite to play is. They’ll talk about what they like and dislike about the different mechanics, their favorite characters, parts they find tricky, etc. And of course, you sit there with a dopey smile while you listen to their rambling without interrupting, even if you don’t understand a word of what they’re saying because they’re just too cute when they’re passionately rambling. 

❥Loser! Hange who loves inviting you over, even if you two are doing absolutely nothing. They adore when you watch them play all sorts of video games. If they’re playing a console game, Hange lays next to you with your head against their shoulder, your arm splaying across their stomach while your hand rests around their waist. You tend to get pretty invested if the game is story based, insisting that they can’t play it without you around to watch the next part of the story unfold. If they’re playing a PC game, you’re sitting in their lap with a skirt that does absolutely nothing to cover your body once you’re seated on top of them. You prefer to face away from them, occasionally squirming in their lap so they can feel your ass pressed against their thighs and stomach. However, you do occasionally enjoy facing them, your arms wrapped around their shoulders as your legs hang off of their gaming chair at either side of their body.

❥Loser! Hange who also loves when you’re sitting in their lap, even if they struggle to focus on the game in front of them when your warm body is pressed against their own. It doesn’t help that they can smell the perfume coming from your neck, tempting them to lean in and kiss you there.

❥Loser! Hange that can’t resist the urge to rest their hands on your thighs during a cutscene, between rounds, during any sort of loading screen or when they’re respawning. They’ll use your thighs to push your ass back and closer to their body. 

❥Loser! Hange kisses your neck from behind, causing you to tilt your head and expose more of your neck for them to kiss. You let out a chuckle at how you effortlessly turned them on just by sitting on their lap and looking pretty.

❥Let’s just say... Loser! Hange finds the opportunity to quit or pause the game as soon as they can. When they eventually return to whatever game they were playing, they find it much easier to focus after you’re both satisfied. ♡

❥Loser! Hange who is also a small streamer! They probably get a few hundred people to watch them game each stream. They may not have a huge community, but their fans are consistent, funny, and always welcoming to new viewers! It’s a comforting little community. Because of this, Hange responds to their chat quite a bit and they’ve made quite a few friends with their mods and regular viewers.

❥Loser! Hange had to explain to you what streaming was. They decided that they would show you what it's like by doing a short stream while you silently watch them game and listen to them talk with their viewers.

❥Loser! Hange never technically introduced you to their fans. Not because they didn’t want to, they just knew that the internet wasn’t always kind, even if their fans are 99% supportive. They wouldn’t mention it much, but they are a little insecure about themself. They know that they treat you like an absolute princess, and they know that you adore them, that’s not the problem. The problem is that they don’t know if they’ll ever feel deserving of you. 

❥Loser! Hange only mentions this to you at late hours of the night when they feel vulnerable and slightly sleepy. You spend countless late nights at sleepovers holding them in your arms and reassuring them just how attractive you find them and that no one has treated you better. They start to feel reassured more once you mention to them that you don’t feel deserving of the endless love they give or of the many ways they spoil you.

anyway back to streamer hcs

❥Loser! Hange didn’t expect you to surprise them one day in their room with their favorite takeout in the middle of a stream. You didn’t know that they were streaming and you wanted to sneak up on them and scare them >:). You slip into their room as quietly as possible, slowly tiptoeing to their form slouched over their desk. Because of the slight delay of their videocam to their viewers, Hange doesn’t get the chance to read all of the different messages of the chatters who spotted your presence and are questioning about it. You silently place the bag of food on the floor, wrapping your arms around their shoulders and kissing their cheek roughly. 

❥Loser! Hange practically jumps out of their chair, yelping from the shock. They realize that it’s you pretty quickly, because no one else would hold or kiss them like that. They pause their game, swiveling around to face you with a wide smile. “Hi, baby!! What are you doin’ here?”

❥Loser! Hange immediately forgets the world around them, forgetting they’re literally live as they try to grab at your hips while they talk to you. “Mmmm,” You hum and giggle. “I just wanted to surprise you. It’s been a few days, I missed you.” You mumble before stepping back so that their hands disconnect from your waist. “Let me get some plates and napkins real quick.” You tell them before you leave the room again.

❥Loser! Hange remembers that they’re streaming, facing their viewers again to read what they missed from chat. “Chat, what do you mean ‘how did you bag a baddie?’” They say, reading some of the messages out loud. “‘How come Hange can get a girlfriend and I can’t? Life isn’t fair-’ WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?” They cut themself off, their jaw dropping a little from the comments they read. The chat starts to go crazy after seeing you. Most of the messages are asking who you are, if Hange is dating you, or simply encouraging Hange to stream with you sometime officially. But of course, it’s much easier to take note of bad comments people say rather than nice ones.

❥Loser! Hange pouts when you return with plates in hand, ignoring their chat again in the blink of an eye. "I'm charming, right? and cute?” They look up at you with puppy eyes as you stand in front of them. “I'm desirable." They say those words like a statement, but it sounds like they’re trying to convince themself rather than state a fact. You hear the insecurities dripping from their tone. You promptly climb into their lap, placing a tender kiss to their cheek while your hand cups the opposite one. You progressively start kissing all over their face, and they close their eyes, giggling and getting lost in the moment. When you eventually begin moving down their neck, their eyes snap open as they remember the audience. "AAAAHHHH, I'M LIVE, I'M LIVE!" They warn you frantically, suddenly remembering again why they were a bit insecure in the first place. This causes you to jump a bit from their yelling. They swivel their chair around to face the monitor, looking at it from over your shoulder. "S-Sorry chat, ending stream a bit early today..." They say quickly, turning off their game and switching tabs to end their video. You chuckle, turning to face their camera. "Oops." you say only a few seconds before they end their stream. 

❥Loser! Hange decides that they might as well officially introduce you after that incident, since they know they’ll be getting teased for it for the next few streams.

❥Loser! Hange never thought that they would be in this situation with anyone, no less you. This exact scenario had been nothing but a fantasy in the corners of their mind. A fantasy that would fog up their mind in the late hours of the night, prompting them to slip their fingers under their boxers and lightly circle their clit with their fingertips, eventually slipping them inside of their warm body. Their back would arch up off of the bed, trying their best to picture that their own fingers were instead yours.

❥Loser! Hange that noticed a sort of glint in your eyes when they asked if it was okay to stream while the two of you were still hanging out. They hadn’t been active in the past handful of days because they’ve been spending all their time with you. They just can’t deny you, especially when you both want to spend all your time with the other.

❥Loser! Hange who has to resist the urge to drool as you carefully and quietly crawl under their desk, looking up at them through your long, mascara coated eyelashes as your knees hit the slightly dusty floor... 

❥You aren’t sure what came over you, but when you were watching them put their headphones on and start welcoming people into their stream, you missed the attention being on you. So decided to tease and torture them and force them to give you attention still. 

❥Loser! Hange is forced to pretend you aren’t under their desk and spreading their thighs and pulling down their boxers while giving them that signature sultry smile with your matching lustful look in your eye. You bite your lip as you part their legs, moving in closer to their folds. They can feel your hot breath on their legs as you kiss, lick, and bite the plush skin of their inner thighs. For a few moments, you feel their hand rest on top of your head and stroke your hair approvingly as you start to rile them up. They can feel their face heating up a little, but if anyone in chat mentions it they just explain that their AC isn’t working properly. Even from just your breath and kisses teasing their thighs, they can feel themself getting wet, the stickiness spreading around their groin.

❥Loser! Hange melts under your touches, but they quickly become needy and desperate for more. Their resolve is always weak when it comes to you, and your teasing will be the death of them. They’re trying so hard not to whine and plead because they have to act normal and play their game. Even when your tongue finally reaches out to meet their pussy, you keep teasing them. You give them as little as you possibly can, spreading their folds with the tip of your tongue, only occasionally flicking up to their clit. You also kiss their puffy pussy lips and their clit, showing how much you love them while simultaneously subjecting them to such sweet torture. When they feel your tongue finally giving them what they wanted, their legs start to twitch slightly from the stimulation. They try their best to regulate their breathing so nothing seems out of the ordinary.

❥Loser! Hange doesn’t know how to act when your mouth starts to move faster and faster between their legs. They’ve stopped looking at their chat entirely, just trying to focus on playing the game somewhat coherently and occasionally talking about it or making a random comment without stuttering or sighing from pleasure.

❥Loser! Hange’s pussy is dripping onto their chair from all of your teasing. The combination of your tongue and their pussy makes an audible squelch as you suck, kiss, and lick up their slit and their hips move slightly, trying to keep up with the rhythm of your tongue. At this point, they’re starting to feel the knot in their stomach tighten, and they’re struggling to hold back their sounds. “Chat, I’ve gotta use the bathroom real quick-” They say, closing their webcam and muting their mic as fast as their fingers let them.

❥Loser! Hange’s hand finds its way back to your head, grabbing a fistful of your hair and pushing you as close to them as biology allows. Their head falls back as they let out a shaky moan. “Ahhh.. F-Fuckk... Please, please more.” They whine, encouraging you to eat them out without fear. You can both feel how their pussy throbs with desire for attention. They’ve been impatiently craving this, so they plan to take full advantage of the fact you’re right where they want you. You pick up the pace, sloppily making out with their pussy and sucking their labia between your lips. They toss one of their legs up onto your shoulder, allowing you more access to them as the knot in their core is almost ready to release. You look up into their eyes, slurping up their juices. The way you look up at them with devotion makes them feel even better due to how much desire is in your expression, adding another layer of eroticism for them from your enjoyment.

❥Loser! Hange feels the tension in their lower stomach releasing. They sigh and moan out into the air lightly as they feel white hot pleasure take their entire mind and body. They arch themself off the chair, trying to meet your mouth even more than already possible. Their body grinds against your tongue as they shiver from the intensity of their orgasm.

❥Immediately after their orgasm subsides, loser! Hange pulls your head up by your hair, kissing you deeply and not caring that they can taste their sticky cum on your plump lips. Their free hand slides down to the back of your thigh, guiding your body to sit on their lap. Their hands are protective and possessive while you make out. They are such a softie, always wanting to cuddle, hug, and kiss after sex. They love you so much and need to let it show, it’s like a warm blanket of warmth and affection covers their heart. They see the world with rose colored glasses for an hour or two after you make them cum, honestly. 

❥Loser! Hange holds you for a little while, their face nuzzled against your neck as they whisper sweet nothings to you. They’ll pepper your neck, collarbones, and face with kisses while telling you how good you made them feel. “I- love- you- so- much- sweet- heart- thank- you-” They’d say between pecks to your skin, causing you to giggle from the slight tickle of their lips moving around your upper body. They only stop their barrage of kisses when you start to push at their shoulders playfully, begging them to stop. “I love youuuu!” They say in a drawn out tone, giving your body a tight squeeze. “But duty calls, so we'll have to continue this later. Don't worry, I'll be thinking about you the whole time!"

❥Loser! Hange loves aftercare, giving and receiving, basically. They’re happy as long as you’re physically close to them <//3.

❥Loser! Hange also used to have inappropriate thoughts about you before you two were officially dating. They knew it was a bit weird to do so without you having any knowledge of it, but they couldn’t help themself. The two of you had exchanged Instagrams after your very first study session and since then, they can’t help but fuck their fingers to your posts. They try to refrain from doing so each time; they attempt to scroll past your stories as if the sight of your face hadn’t already turned them on. Each time it always ends the same, inevitably retyping your name in the search bar to revisit the photo. At this point it had to be some sort of conditioning, the way their body would react to you like clockwork. But they still feel so embarrassed to be so obsessed with you simply because you gave them an ounce of attention.

❥Loser! Hange used to imagine you in all sorts of different positions for them. You name it, they’ve probably thought about it once or maybe even twice. Sometimes they would imagine you sitting on their face, other times they could imagine you under them as they would fuck their strap into you. When Hange feels extra desperate, they like to picture the ways you would take them, perhaps you would trap them against the bed, fingering their throbbing pussy while making out with them to ensure that they weren’t too loud. A favorite daydream of theirs surrounds the different types of faces you would make as they eat you out. They yearn to see how your eyes might look down at them, pleading for them to make you cum, or how they may be shut entirely, your lips parted to sigh out with pleasure from how good they’re making you feel. They’d wonder what kind of sounds you would make. Were you loud? Quiet? Shy? Breathy? Are you the type that moans, or are you the type that whimpers? These questions had plagued their mind until they finally had you for the first time after 4-5 dates. <3

i miss hange rip hange you would’ve loved being the most nerdy loser dork the geek world ever saw.

[adragonsfriend]

Ways to Write a Meaningful AO3 Comment…

…or frankly, a comment on any writing or artwork where your primary goal is to encourage and appreciate the creator.

It occurs to me that comments are a mini writing task, I have been a writing tutor, and if I’m going to ramble about how not to form communities and have meaningful interactions on the internet, I could maybe also help make it a little easier.

This post is written on the assumption that people want to interact, but struggle for whatever reason: nervous, tired, didn’t realize comments meant that much, can’t think of what to say. I myself spent years at a time on ao3 not commenting on literally anything—something about stones in glass houses. But in my experience, while getting comments on my own fics is kind of my favourite, leaving the kind of comment I know I would cherish—and sometimes getting replies from authors replying to my comments and actually chatting with them—is pretty damn magical too.

In that spirit, this post is henceforth a how-to, not an argument, and I’m not going to address anything to do with bad faith comments. I’m gonna try and provide some structures and simple formats to start comments from. I cannot emphasise enough, these are all intended to be used from a place of sincerity. Tools for finding and formatting the appreciation which is already in your brain, just hiding from you.

That said, we’re gonna take this in stages—

1. The Chapter Kudos

“Chapter kudos,” a little “<3,” an “I loved this,” or similar simple expressions of warmth and enthusiasm, slapped on a oneshot or each chapter of a long fic. These are a nice small gesture that lets the author know you’re here and you’re still loving the fic. Not every author is in love with the these type of very short comments, but unless they have a specific note about it, they’re almost certainly glad for the knowledge you’re still reading. This is minimal—great for days or weeks when you’re tired, low effort, can’t think of shit to say about a particular chapter, and so on. Comments, like all tasks, must be allowed to vary in intensity with available energy and time.

2. The 1-2 sentences

A one or two sentence comment. Here, a combination of a general compliment: “this was amazing,” and a specific compliment: “character A’s dialogue felt so realistic” works really well.

General compliments are typically easier to come up with:

What an awesome chapter!

Wow ok I did not see that coming—

I fucking. Love. Your writing.

This was so exciting!

I screamed when I saw this updated

Maybe a little over the top, but you get the idea—it’s hard to go wrong with these.

Specific compliments are often a little harder to come up with, but they generally fall into two categories which are both wonderful: content and writing.

Content includes things like:

I love [character] so much, seeing them in [particular situation] was so fun

Wow there’s so little content for [niche fandom/character/ship/trope] it’s great to see it here

Your idea about [authors headcanon] is so smart—that makes [weird element of canon] make so much sense

I didn’t used to be into [trope/ship] but holy fuck am I convinced now

The point being you’re noting a particular element content of the fic—what and who it’s about—that you loved. These are great because getting really damn excited about a character/trope/headcanon etcetera, really is the heart of fandom.

Writing takes a slightly different tack, and talks about the author’s writing skills—what they do well:

You write such good dialogue, it feels really realistic

Your action scenes are so exciting!

The tone of this chapter was so perfectly creepy—the way you describe [setting/character] gave me the shivers

The spacing you used really fit the piece—it’s a neat way to show the character’s mindset there they’re struggling to think clearly

The combination of a general and specific compliment can make it easier to start writing your comment, while giving you a second to think of your specific thought. It’s simple, but it means a lot to get any kind of specific comment, because it shows the author that you are paying attention to their writing and that you appreciate or relate to them, specifically. These comments are fairly quick to write, but can mean so much.

3. The paragraph

Several sentences long, with a bit more room to explain what you loved. Everything from the 1-2 sentence section applies here too. A general compliment is still a great starting point, and specific compliments are still where we want to end up. The main difference is you’ve got a little more room to talk, and you can take that in a few different directions.

You can talk about one specific compliment for a bit:

I love the way you write dialogue—character A saying “[quote]” was exactly what they would say in that situation. And their banter with character B was incredible, i laughed out loud. The way they both use cursing, but in slightly different ways is fascinating. The way character B does it is…

Or you can go through several different ones quickly:

I love the way you write dialogue—character A saying “[quote]” was exactly what they would say in that situation. The fast dialogue kept the pace up and the whole chapter was so exciting—I loved that you brought up character B and character C’s relationship too, it gets so little attention but I love it…

There’s also room for wider observations and questions (these can also totally go in 1-2 sentence comments, it’s just easier to have a little more substance around them):

Your writing always makes me feel so [feelings]

Wait I’m a little confused did [event] happen the way I think it did, or am I being silly?

Your ideas about [character] are awesome, I love everything you’ve written about them.

I’m so curious, what’s your specific lore on [character/event]?

4. Multiparagraph

Several paragraphs, or a very long paragraph. Hot damn, the author is in love with you now. Either you’ve got a whole lot to say about one specific topic of writing or content, or you’ve got a couple of different topics you want to pay some attention to—as you start writing your comment, you’ll probably discover a few more. Let yourself ramble, make bullet points, just get your thoughts out, if you have this many. All the principles from before apply: general compliments, specific compliments, wider observations, questions—all of these can easily feature in a long comment.

5. Fuck Formating

Write comments in whatever format works for you. Bullet points, google translated into the necessary language, rambling, well organized, short, long, emojis, copy-pasting your favorite quote from the fic with an exclamation point, pre-formatted general compliments, whatever will get your thoughts and enthusiasm down.

If you are communicating, the format doesn’t matter all that much. The same information from a multi paragraph comment can be done in bullet points or by quoting. Whatever communication you do will be meaningful to the author.

It’s hard to go wrong—

Like most writing, making meaningful comments and picking out those specific compliments gets easier with practice. There’s no need to write multiparagraph comments all the time. Those 1-2 sentence ones can be full of so much love, and chapter kudos are sometimes all there’s energy for.

The most important writing advice ever in my opinion is this: you have interesting things to say. About yourself, about the world, about writing, about that damn fanfic.

Go forth and use the structures above, or come up with comments I couldn’t even dream of. Whatever you do, you will find fic authors are probably the most willing and grateful audience in the whole world.

[alexanderlightweight]

Could i request: any fic where simon puts his foot in his mouth around malec? I love how you write Simon (and how he interacts with both magnus and Alec) No survival instinct at all, that one

it has been a while but here we go, I hope you enjoy. this is just Simon finding trouble and then trying to find help as usual. also yes, I love your comment that is 100% accurate. no survival instinct whatsoever in Simon.

<3 lumine

trouble for two

Simon pauses at the door, wondering why he’s hesitating when he has every right to be here.

Probably.

Except he and Magnus have bonded, definitely.  Maybe not over everything, but at least over raiding Camille’s house that one time.

So they’ve definitely bonded enough that Magnus most likely won’t kill Simon for showing up out of nowhere with a problem that Simon definitely can’t fix on his own.

“Why are you here?” Simon can’t help his dismay or the way his voice waivers at the sight of a tall, deadly shadowhunter where he expected a well-dressed warlock.

“I live here, Simon.”

Simon swears that Alec’s said the exact same thing about the Institute which means one of them has to be a lie, right?

He must say some part of his thought process outloud, because Alec is frowning at him, arms crossed over his chest. 

“I need to talk to Magnus.”

“It’s eleven in the morning, Simon.  Magnus is asleep and he’s going to stay that way for several hours. He’s also not going to be happy about the fact that you woke me up, let alone if you also wake him up.”

Simon whimpers a little, but he needs the help.  He really does and something in his expression or demeanor must give him away.  Alec is pinching his nose but motioning Simon inside and then Alec’s sending a fire message.

A moment later a message is sent back, but to Simon this time and he winces because it’s from Raphael.

‘Do not fuck this up.’ 

So Raphael has no faith in him, or — Simon sneaks a glance at Alec — way too much faith.

“You’re free to sit here and wait. Don’t touch anything. I’ll be back when Magnus wakes up.”

At that point, Simon realizes he’s not in the semi-familiar loft of Magnus but inside a neat, spacious room.  There are windows with sun-veils and a bookcase filled along with a small tablet and it’s very close to what Simon guesses a magical waiting room would be like.

“Wait, where are you going?”

“Back to bed, with Magnus. You’re welcome to wait as long as you need to.”

Simon blinks at the door shutting behind Alec and even as vampire speed has him up and across the room, the door seals shut.  Oh the one to leave is still there and Simon glares at longingly.  

As he sits back down and pokes at the tablet which is connected to a variety of streaming services and libraries, Simon decides this isn’t the worst thing he’s done and certainly is probably one of the safer places he’s been.

Also he should probably be thankful that Alec didn’t try to stay and keep him company.  Simon couldn’t have handled that, even if he did panic when Alec first left him alone.

—-

Magnus can tell the day will be a terrible one the moment he feels sunlight on his eyelids.  Sunlight that is normally rather conveniently blocked by Alexander’s fluffy hair and broad shoulders.

The space beside him is empty and slowly warming from the sun, the pillow still indented but rising and Magnus’ anger and panic nearly flare when Alexander slips back into the room.

“Darling—” Magnus breathes out because the nightmares have held him too tightly as of late.  

Alexander is there in a mere second, steady and cool and pulling Magnus into his arms and pressing soothing kisses to his hair.

“Simon’s here.” Is not what he expects to hear and all of the lovely calm that Alexander’s touch brought shatters.

“Is he?” Magnus can recognize the dangerous edge to his voice and knows it’s unwarranted, except Simon is still an intruder. 

“In the waiting room. I figured he could test it out for us.” 

Magnus calms at the realization, sleepiness coiling in his belly alongside pleasure.

“It worked then?”

“Like a charm.” Alexander teases and kisses his brow, “and I’m back until you wake for good. So come cuddle me and fall back asleep, Magnus.”

It’s hardly a request Magnus wants to or is going to deny and Alexander’s arms embrace him so willingly and with such fervor as sleep snares him back into her web.

Lips press again to his hair and Magnus gets greedy fingers on the skin of Alexander’s chest and waist and then back before he pauses on the verge of sleep.

“Did you open the door shirtless?”

Alexander sighs, “it was only Simon.”

Only Simon.

As if that truly makes it any better.

It could have been anyone and while Alexander can’t be hurt with the wards intact, he is far too tempting half-naked and sleep-soft for him to be answering the door fresh from bed! 

Magnus curls tighter around his boy and lets his lips press against the steady pulse of Alexander’s neck.

AN:

I dont know what magnus is assuming but i assure you, simon did not consider alec sleep-soft or tempting beyond ‘looks like he could kill me, would kill me. Only magnus’ cinnamon roll’.

If you’ve seen howl’s moving castle? Magnus set up a door spin card that can open to a waiting room  and office to keep people out of his more private spaces. Alec was testing it out. No he did not ask simon or tell him it’s an experiment. He figures simon is durable enough to handle if anything goes wrong and if not, well he did wake them up.

[hope-andwhatnot]

So uh … I would never comment a negative thing on someone’s fic or fan art but I have some … general critiques 🤷‍♀️ that are kind of fandom wide so here we go

1) there are a lot of you that are either too young to drink or don’t drink that don’t know enough about alcohol to write about it. This can be remedied by talking to your friends or family who do drink or by doing some research on the subject but here’s some basics incase you would prefer not to do that

On the rocks means iced. Neat means not iced (and usually straight from the shelf)

Bourbon is sweet, rye and scotch are not. All three are considered a type of whiskey - an alcoholic drink made of grain

Martinis are typically made with vodka, vermouth and olives. A dry one is made with less vermouth. A dirty one has olive juice. Some people like gin instead of vodka (which I think is gross but gin is also cheaper)

You need to drink a significant amount of alcohol (or have a very low tolerance and even still) to black out. I have notoriously sucked down about 8-10 drinks without losing consciousness or memory back in my party days and I am a petite woman who did not drink often outside of the bar scene

2) A lot of you don’t know what jambalaya is and it shows

Jambalaya literally translates to “mishmash” and is a dish that consists of a protein, the holy trinity (bell peppers, celery, and onions), rice and seasonings that directly relate to the chosen protein. My family always made it with kielbasa or sausage, but it can be made with any protein or combo. Also some people add more vegetables but you don’t have to (I like it with peas and corn but that’s just me)

3) there is TONS more to Louisiana cuisine than jambalaya and even more to southern cuisine. Alastor grew up in the middle of the Great Depression so he was privy to the peak of Southern food and culture which is what it is due to this time period where literally everyone was starving

Biscuits and gravy

Seafood boil (shrimp boil, crab boil, crawdad boil, etc)

Fried chicken (skin on to make the meat feel more filling)

The idea that anyone who comes to your home must be offered food and drink and that no one should ever leave hungry comes from this time period. Alastor likely would make sure the kitchen was always fully stocked and that guests were always fed if only because that was the politesse he was raised with and a gentleman (especially a southern one) would never be so rude

Sweet tea

4) Shudder: to tremble or shake

Shutter: a type of window covering popular in parts of the world that suffer from tornadoes. Also used as slang for being closed up tight.

So I’d better not be seeing the phrase “he shuttered” in a fic anymore because that’s not a thing people do. He shuddered

5) hunting dogs do not kill people. Hunting dogs do not kill period. It would be counterproductive to their job and also it is regurgitated PETA rhetoric that targets poor people (people who hunt for their food, notoriously a lower and working class activity as they could not afford to buy meat at the grocery store)

Thank you for coming to my TED talk

[teddyfalls]

WHY WON’T YOU BE MY GIRL? — conrad fisher

PAIRING. conrad fisher x conklin!reader

SYNOPSIS. conrad asks you to go to the beach with him late at night so that he can teach you to surf and things lead elsewhere.

WARNINGS & FEATURES. fluff but angst if you squint, ooc conrad, shy reader, fem!reader (implied), you/yours pronouns used, no use of y/n

WORD COUNT. 1.1k

TEDDY TALKS. hi!! this is my first fic posted on here so i hope you guys enjoy it. it’s also dedicated to my best friend and the moon to my sun <3

masterlist. | who i write for. | divider credit: @cafekitsune

this fic is based on “why won’t you be my girl?” by william hinson.

THE NIGHT HAD FALLEN FASTER than you had fallen in love. It wasn’t a new thing by any means—anything Conrad did made you fall even more head-over-heels for him, even if that was near impossible. But tonight, it felt different. It felt like the love had come anew.

“Are you coming then?”

Even his voice sounded like honey. A perfect melody mixed intermittently with the midnight wind, like his voice was made to make you fall in love with him right then and there.

“To the beach?”

You ask, wondering why on Earth he was asking you to come to the beach with him at nine at night, just days after you’d gotten to Cousins. Conrad had been in a far better mood, that lovely light-bringing smile on his face, his past teasing demeanour at its full potential. Yet something still felt… off with him. Like something was toying with his mind, but you didn’t want to ask. Didn’t want to ruin his mood.

“Yeah, the beach. Obviously. Do you— d’you not want to come?”

There was a hesitance in his words that you wanted to point out, but your mind didn’t dwindle on it for too long.

However, you did stay silent for a moment, causing him to tilt his head to the side in mere confusion. It didn’t take him long to figure out that you had sensed the hesitation within his voice, and his eyes softened their glare.

He rested his hands against the smooth side of his surfboard, which was completely light blue in colour and reflected the moonlight against its surface.

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to. I just thought it’d be nice to offer, you know? Take you surfing like you asked last summer.”

That brings a smile back on your face.

He remembered.

You nod rather eagerly, and he smiles back—all teeth and lips, a complete sure smile that never faltered. It made you so glad to see him like this, no darkness behind those eyes, just a sparkle in them. A sparkle that only seemed to appear when he was with you.

—

It took you both only a couple of minutes to get down to the beach, the wind running through your hair making Conrad’s look rather neat compared to yours. It made him laugh quietly watching you spin against the weight of the wind to try and get it out of your face.

He stopped just before the crux of the ocean, where it swam up against the shore and licked the sand with its cold waters. He wanted to actually try to teach you before you got in the water, knowing it’d be safer for you that way (and knowing Steven would have his head if he put you in harm’s way).

As he planted his surfboard in the ground beside him, he held a hand out for yours.

“Oh? You want this?” You say with a laugh. “You’ll have to come and get it!”

And with that you took off, running down the beach and kicking your sliders off on the way, looking back at him.

He laughed wholeheartedly, yelling as he watched you run off.

“There’s no way I’m running!”

Even though it was dark—being nighttime and the time when you would usually be watching a movie with your mother and Savannah—you could still see his face lighting up with not just the moonlight, but with a happiness that you hadn’t seen in a long time. Happiness that you knew no matter what that he deserved more than anything.

Despite his words, the moment you’d stopped to turn around to see if he was following, he took off too, running after you with sand kicking up behind his feet.

He managed to catch up with you quick enough, hands reaching for yours blindly as the moon hid behind a cloud for a second. The moment he touched you, you’d dropped the surfboard you were holding and let it clatter to the ground as the moon came back out, coating you both in a glittery shimmer of moonlight. His hands were still clasping around your wrists when you moved one of your hands to manoeuvre the hair from his eyes, wanting to see that sparkle in a closer proximity.

“C—“ you began, but he cut you off.

“I think I caught you.” He says, breathlessly. Practically panting into your face, his eyes search yours, that smile on your face fading to something of a miniature grin. A knowing one.

“Yeah?” You whisper lightly.

“Yeah.” He mutters back, eyes flicking momentarily to your lips. His hands flex around your wrists, letting them go once his mind had returned to what he was actually doing.

Looking like he had more to say than just simply that, he gulps. Your Conrad—the boy you’d liked since, well, forever had you wrapped around his finger. Yet he was the shy one.

“I wanted to, ahem, ask something,” he manages to get out, a cough between his words, voice still low in the moonlight as he starts to make space between you, all too well conscious of the minimal amount of it from beforehand.

“Ask away, Conrad. I’m here.” You say, voice equally as quiet, if not more.

“Why won’t you be with me?”

You look extremely confused, so he presses on.

“Why won’t you be my girl?”

With that the proximity between you immediately minimises again, his breath fanning against your face in quick, short intervals. You look into his eyes, almost pleading him to say something, to break the silence before you have to do it yourself.

The hands by his sides move, almost in slow motion, but then it’s as if fireworks explode in your mind and you can’t help but let your body move without willing it to do so, letting your body have a pure mind of its own as you move even closer to him. He lets your bodies easily become one, hands coming up to cup your face as if it’s second nature.

Then he’s pressing his lips against yours and it's like nothing else in the world exists anymore. The more he tilts your chin up into his the more he smiles, and you smile too, and those fireworks feel like they’ll never cease to exist.

You’re the one to break it. Break the silence and the kiss, panting rugged breaths as his hand moves a strand of your hair from your eyes, just as you had done for him.

“I will.” You whisper, holding onto his wrists now.

“I will be your girl, Conrad.”

⌗ teddyfalls

[luxfuxxvii]

my theories on Bilbo Baggins - Post Quest

why is Bilbo's house a mess????? im 90% certain that it was not normally so messy???? at least not back then??????? WHATS THE REASON???? well i have a few theories (ignore the fact that i should be watching instead of making this post)

excuse me while i get to the third chapter, I have to double check this shit before i share any theories. [this is where I start progressing in the movie]

okay the doorway isnt.

ITS NOT!!!!

DOUBLE CONFIRMED ITS NOT!!!!

Okay so in An Unexpected Journey, we start the story with Bilbo as an old man, the day of his 111st birthday. Idk if you guys can see, or have noticed, but his house is a right mess. There's cheese dropped on the carpet, crumbs on the floor, papers everywhere (like me too Bilbo, i know thats a writer thing, but it just needs to be mentioned in order to further the argument), countless books stacked high instead of actually put away, dirty dishes, mail hes ignoring, etc. Now, if you get further into the movie where the dwarves are all coming in, you'll see that it didn't USED to be so unkempt. In fact it was relatively neat.

So why isn't it tidy post-quest???? well. well. my friends. my theories, that I've decided are all true, include:

1. old age. he got old. it hurts to clean. yeah that'll do it. pick a joint, pick a bone, pick any set of tendons, theyre going to hurt.

2. the ring definitely made him less aware, less mindful. it takes up all his time by fucking with his mind and worsening his-

3. GRIEF!!!!! HOLY SHIT THE GRIEF!!!!!! Guys, his house was ransacked at the end of the quest. Y'know what that means???? All evidence of the dwarves is gone. All of it. The furniture wasn't in the same spots as they were the night the dwarves came. And if you're a rearranging adhder you know for a fact that the placement of your furniture holds memories. THIS POOR MAN HAS NOTHING LEFT OF THEM ASIDE FROM ahem I digress. he is simply too sad to keep track of his home like he used to. he does not have the energy, the will- he has all the time in the world but he needs that to be spent on something else, anything else.

4. this. this. you guys. this also leads into grief. yknow how the dwarves completely obliterated the state of his home???? "mud trod on the carpet, they've pillaged the pantry, im not even gonna tell you what they've done to the bathroom, theyve all but destroyed the plumbing. I dont understand what they're doing in my house!" so basically. the only thing. the only thing he has left of them. is the mess. thats it. thats all. just the mess. AHHHHHHHHH-

5. he is definitely not the same hobbit as the one who left the shire. i think maybe in the aftermath, after finally returning home, he adopted many traits of the company in order to preserve their memory. this is a very real thing guys. you lose someone, and you pick up the habits you most remember them by. thats just how grief works. it is a subconscious thing that you cant always control, at least not without help. dont get me wrong, hes still very obviously a hobbit, but you dont come out of a year long adventure in the company of 13 rowdy dwarves unchanged.

6. this could actually be what Frodo was referring to when he said that "You know, people are beginning to wonder about you, uncle. They think youre becoming ... odd." "Odd?" "Unsociable." the state of his house COULD just be that he is withdrawing from Frodo, from neighbors, from friends, etc. his mind is a thousand miles away, thinking of a distant mountain-- certainly hes not worried about the state of his kitchen when he could be going BACK.

this all basically narrows down to Bilbo's grief. but I just had to point it out.

Personally, I'm never going to use this information in my fics because i believe in HAPPY endings, thank you very much. however, this NEEDS to be shared with the people who are braver than me and are actually willing to write something so gut wrenchingly depressing.

[levandright]

HII this is my fluff wip tht i scratch away bc i hv too many smut reqs

Summary : One of them writes a love letter to get over their feelings, but it accidentally ends up in the other’s hands. Not knowing the letter is about them, they ask the writer for advice on how to respond to their own letter, sparking a chain of misunderstandings until the truth is revealed.

What i had in mind :

-Jake wrote it to y/n

-He accidentally lost the letter while he was walking on the hallway

-The letter ended up in front of y/n’s locker

-She picked it up and read it

-Told jake abt the letter (but they r both idiots) until somehow they figure it out bc it got obvious

Feel free to change the plot!! ( I might write a part 2 from ur fic if u make it <3)

Letter of the Heart

pairing : jake x f!reader ୨ৎ content / warning(s) : fluff, they're friends, funny misunderstanding cause they're idiots(jake specifically but its okay <3), highschool au ୨ৎ word count : 1k ・ archive

synopsis. when y/n finds a love letter at her locker, she has no idea who it’s from, so she asks her best friend, jake, for help with what to say. jake, being the good friend he is, jumps in—giving advice, joking around, and even offering to “practice” her responses.

ᐢ..ᐢ lev notes : ended this on a cliffhanger hehe >:3 hope you like what i did mama belle <3 cause i had an awesome time, thinking of what to add on to make it more fun.

part 2 here!

it all starts with a love letter. jake, who’s been silently carrying a crush on you for ages, finally pours out his feelings on paper. he didn't plan on giving you the letter—it just something he wrote to work through his emotions. but the next day, while walking to class in a rush, the letter slips out of his notebook and lands right in front of your locker.

later, you spot the folded note, curious, and decide to read it. your heart flutters as you take in the words—gentle, vulnerable, clearly written by someone who has been holding these feelings close. but who could it be? the handwriting is neat, but familiar. intrigued, you decide to find out.

during break time, you bring it up to jake. “i found this letter outside my locker,” you say, holding it up, eyes sparkling with curiosity. “it’s… really sweet. but i have no idea who wrote it!”

jake, obliviously laughs. “a secret admirer, huh?” he teases, thinking of all the possible suspects. “what did it say?”

you blush reading a line out loud: “‘every time i see you smile, i feel like everything makes sense.’” jake’s heart skips a beat, hearing his own words, but he quickly pushes away the strange familiarity of it.

-------------

later that afternoon in the cafeteria. you hold up the love letter, cheeks flushed as you read through it again. you sigh looking to jake for help. “it says, ‘you make me believe in all the little things that make life beautiful.’ how… how am i supposed to respond to something like that?”

jake laughs, trying to brush off the pang of recognition he feels. did he… write that? he wonders but shakes the thought away, assuming it’s just an odd coincidence.

“maybe say something like, ‘i didn’t know i had such an impact on you!’” he suggests. “or if you want to be bolder, add, ‘tell me more about these little things.’ you know, just to tease them a bit.”

you beam, nodding. “that’s actually perfect! you’re a genius at this.”

jake chuckles, putting on a casual smile while his heart races. “just call me the love doctor.” he can’t shake the strange feeling, but he pushes it aside, too embarrassed to imagine he might be your admirer.

-------------

in the library the next day, you and jake go over the letter again, trying to analyze every word.

“whoever wrote this,” you murmur, pointing to a line, “has a way with words. ‘every time i see you smile, i feel like the world gets a little brighter.’ that’s… that’s intense. do you know anyone who’d say something like that?”

jake’s pulse quickens as the words ring a familiar bell in his head. that sounds like… something he would write.

trying to cover, he shrugs. “uh, well, it’s probably someone with a soft side,” he jokes, mentally kicking himself. “maybe they read a lot, or… watch a lot of rom-coms?”

you laugh, clearly enjoying the mystery. “could be… but it feels so genuine, like they really meant it.”

he tries to smile, but his mind races. could it really be… his own letter? the thought sends his heart racing, and he fights to keep his cool, feeling embarrassed that he might be guiding you to respond to his letter.

-------------

that night, as jake lies in bed, an unsettling thought lingers in his mind. could it actually be… my letter?

the more he thinks about it, the more familiar those lines sound, and his stomach twists with both excitement and dread. sitting up, he grabs his backpack and rummages through it, pulling out his notebook. he flips through the pages, looking for the tucked-away letter he remembers putting there. but as he gets to the back of the notebook, his stomach drops.

the letter isn’t there.

“no, no, no…” he mutters, flipping through each page again. but it’s nowhere to be found. he recalls that day in the hallway when he’d been rushing to class. it must’ve slipped out then!

jake groans, covering his face with both hands, completely mortified. 'she’s been reading my letter this whole time… and i’ve been helping her respond to it!'

-------------

as you sit in class together, you try to bring up the letter again. “so, about my response… i was thinking of adding a line about—”

jake quickly interrupts, laughing a bit too loudly. “oh, yeah, sure, whatever you think, it’s all good!” he blushes, then looks away. “i mean… i’m sure whoever it is would be thrilled with anything you say.”

you narros your eyes, studying his red face. “are you okay, jake? you’ve been acting really… weird since yesterday.”

jake scratches the back of his neck, glancing everywhere but you. “who, me? no, no, i’m fine. totally normal. it’s… totally normal for me to help you write a love letter to someone i don’t even know, right?”

he lets out a nervous laugh, mentally cringing at how ridiculous he sounds, and you just raise an eyebrow, watching him closely. is he blushing? you wonder, putting the pieces together bit by bit. but you don’t say anything yet, waiting for the right moment.

-------------

the next day, you read the letter over again, something finally clicking. as you recall jake’s reactions, the strange look in his eyes every time you talked about the letter, you suddenly realize the truth.

the next day during lunch, you turn to jake, a small knowing smile on your face. “jake… i have a hunch. about who wrote the letter.”

jake’s heart stops. “oh? who… who do you think it is?”

your eyes search his, twinkling with a new understanding. “i think it was… you.”

jake’s eyes widen, and his mouth opens, but before he can respond, the bell rings, signaling the end of lunch. you stand up, leaving him stunned in his seat as you head off to class with a glance over your shoulder, you give him a teasing smile.

“see you after class, jakey~” you say with a playful tone.

jake is left sitting there, his heart racing, unsure of what you’ll say—or what he’ll say—when you finally meet again.

perm taglist.@honeybelleee @honeychocos @manaah02 @kozumesphone (open!)

requests. open!

©levandright

[licorice-tea]

And There You Are, An Ocean Away

Pairing: Trafalgar Law x reader (and a little Nami x Vivi if you squint)

Content: friends to lovers, fluff, anxious/hopeful crush feelings, confessions, long distance relationships, reader is a Straw Hat Pirate, and Law is a little awkward <3

Word Count: 1.2k

A/N: this is one of the first fics i’ve finished and i’m not the best at grammar rules so there are probably a few mistakes! also i might have made Law a little ooc lol, but besides that im just trying to write more to improve! thanks for reading :)

Edited 1/17/23

be-beep. be-bee-

“Hello?” Law cuts off the ringing of his transponder snail. He can’t help but smile to himself upon hearing the voice on the other end of the line.

“Law? Merry Christmas!”

“Merry Christmas, y/n.” He leans back in his desk chair, twisting the cord of the transponder snail around finger “E” while holding the phone in the other hand.

“Sooo,” you drawl, “have you guys started opening presents yet?”

Law can practically hear you smiling, which makes him exhale in amusement before responding. “Yeah, the crew exchanged gifts and opened them earlier this morning. How about you?”

“Mhm, we were up as soon as the sun rose- Chopper and Luffy woke up the whole crew.” You pause, and he can imagine you biting back a laugh while shaking your head as you often do. “Anyway… Did you get everything you wanted?” You sound expectant, almost knowing.

In his usual deadpan tone, he answers simply. “Bepo got me a new coffee blend.”

“That’s nice of him… he’s always so considerate.”Based on your tone it’s not quite the answer you were looking for, but you provide commentary anyway.

“Ohh yeah,” He continues on the other end of the line, feigning the recollection of something important, “and there was this massive box on deck…”

“Oh good!” You exclaim as Law chuckles. “You scared me, I thought you hadn’t gotten it. Did everyone like their gifts?”

You’re referring, of course, to the comically large box that the Straw Hats had shipped to the Heart Pirates. It was packed to the brim with gifts for every crew member. After all, what was the point of having tons of berries from “stolen” treasure if not to use it on your friends? Or at least, that’s the reasoning you used to convince Nami to rearrange some funds for gifts to the Heart Pirates and other allies of the Straw Hats. Though, maybe it was just because you had mentioned sending a gift to Vivi back in Alabasta as well…

“They all really liked it, a lot. Was it your idea?”

“No,” you explain with a playful cadence, “it was a group effort.”

“Sure thing, but the bows and wrapping paper has you written all over it. And the handwritten card…”

“I have the best handwriting on our ship! Besides, we all signed it so, its from all of us.”

The only part that 100% was not from all of the Straw Hat Crew, was a box with Law’s name on it at the bottom of the much larger box. Inside the present addressed to the “Captain of the <3 Pirates” was a neat little coin display with places for 25 coins, as well as a card tucked in beside the display.

“Well, it was nice of all of you then.” He concedes with a snark in his voice. “And, uh… I like what you got for me, y/n.” Law’s voice comes out a little quieter, and maybe even a little deeper towards the end. He sounds hopeful, not 100% sure if it was you that had chosen his gift, yet knowing that only you could have selected something so sentimental and- ugh, perfect. His tone makes your stomach do flips.

“Yeah? Good, I’m glad.” Your voice, now a bit softer, replies. “I was worried you might have already had-“

“I-I didn’t. I’ve just been storing my collection in boxes...” He trails off, now tracing the edges of the coin display you’d gotten him. It was nothing exceedingly special or expensive, but it meant a lot knowing you had thought of him- just him- and went out of your way to send him a gift. The thought that you cared about him as much as he did you had his heart beating faster already.

You only knew Law was a coin collector because he chose to tell you. Thats how it usually was with him- he only shared the parts of himself he wanted to share. (Though you did also have a knack for “catching his vibe” as you liked to say.) Anyhow, you also knew his office was painfully tidy and there was little to no decoration, despite having ample bookshelf space. And so, a display for his not-so-secret hobby seemed like a perfect gift!

But, that wasn’t the only thing you’d added to his present. There was also a card, in which you’d written something along the lines of “I’m so glad I met you…. You deserve so many great things, but hopefully this coin display will suffice for now… I have feelings for you…. Merry Christmas! xxx, y/n” You had sort of just slipped in the confession between other clauses.

“And did you read the card…?” Your face suddenly feels a little warmer. Not that there was anything scandalous in the card, just some very honest words about your feelings for Law. Words you hadn’t ever been bold enough to say out loud and in person, and still hadn’t been brave enough to write without lots of other thoughts and well wishes surrounding them.

“Card?…” You hear some shuffling on his end, “I’ll read it now.”

“Mkay.” Your short response is a telltale sign of your own nerves, which makes him curious to find out what you could’ve written.

There’s a prolonged silence as he reads, and Law’s heart skips a beat as he nears the end. His eyes go back over and over 5 specific words: “…I have feelings for you.” He feels nearly giddy with excitement, but it comes out as pure anxious energy. He never thought this would actually happen; a scenario where you reciprocated his affections had only ever happened in his imagination up until now. Usually in these scenarios, he’d have worked up the courage and audacity to tell you how he felt in person, and not only would you accept his confession; you’d also return his feelings. But now that it was actually happening? He found himself at a loss for words, heart beating in his ears and probably blushing like some lovesick idiot.

Law wants to say something perfect for you, something charming and witty, but all he can think of in the moment is, “… I read it.”

His throat feels dry, like he doesn’t know what else to say. Law likes you too of course- how could he not? Ever since you’d met back in Saobody Archipelago, though the interaction had been brief, he’d thought you were beautiful, strong, and somehow a little different from the other Straw Hat Pirates. Then he’d gotten to know you; really know you, beyond your fighting capabilities and the information on your bounty poster. You were kind, witty, selfless, hardworking, and so much more. And alas, absence only makes the heart grow fonder.

Sure, you’d started off as allies, but that quickly became friendship, and a close friendship at that. He liked you because of your acceptance for nearly anyone, so long as they seemed a good person. Even more so, your ability to understand his emotions despite his usually reserved nature (he secretly thinks it’s some sort of sign, but in reality you’re just emotionally intelligent.) And you like Law because of his obvious (though he tries to hide it) love and passion for so many things: his crew, his work, etc. This, along with his witty, albeit odd sense of humor, made you enjoy his company quite a lot. The two of you took most every chance you had to be in each others company, since they were few and far between. Sometimes you’d chat, with you doing most of the talking and Law being content to listen and only add comments where he thought them necessary. Other times you’d follow each other into battle to provide support for the other, though neither of you had ever really needed help in those situations.

You swallow the lump in your own throat and continue, “You don’t have to have an answer or anything right now, I just want you to know how I feel.” Law doesn’t say anything, and so you continue while trying not to sound disappointed. “Merry Christmas, Law.”

“…”

“Law?”

“I like you too.” his words come out sort in a rush, like he had been holding his breath.

“Y-you do?”

“Yeah.”

You can’t help but smile.

“Well, uh, I have to go now, but… Can I call you tonight?” He asks hesitantly, even though you’ve already confessed that you feel the same way he does.

“Yes, that’s fine! I… I was worried that you didn’t feel the same way for a second.” You laugh, light and airy.

He scoffs, but you know it’s not meant to sound mean when it comes from him. If anything, it’s endearing. “Of course I do.”

You giggle again, “Bye, Law.”

“Bye, y/n.”

As soon as you hang up, his nervous frown turns into a small smile, and it grows and spreads across his face until he’s grinning like a fool and hiding his face under the brim of his hat.

[groovy-rat-man]

Random baseless punch out wii headcanon time!!

I KEEP TRYING TO SAVE THIS TO DRAFTS BUT IT KEEPS POSTING INSTEAD BUT FUCK IT WE BALL (i might add more stuff or change things but this is what I've got so far)

Doc Louis

Hes not the step dad he's the dad who stepped up

Hes got a tshirt that says that and every time he wears it in public mac dies a little inside

Hes also got pictures of him and mac together in his wallet that he likes showing off to people

Im gonna take this time and tell you about this crackship I like. Idk why but doc louis/gabby jay is just very cute to me and i wanted to share that with you

Little Mac

Everyone makes him transmasc, everyone makes him autistic, everyone makes him selectively mute and I just so happen to be part of everyone soooo...

I might however be projecting myself onto him just a little bit but whatev

Him and Birdie are like brothers to me, not biologically but still <3

Pretty awkward around his fans, especially the ones who don't respect his personal space (looking at YOU, nameless women in super macho man's title defense intro😡)

Got called into the counselors office at his school a lot because he was always covered in bruises, every time he just showed them his latest match on his phone like "yeah don't worry everything cool at home I just get my ass kicked as my job"

Tries to be friendly with all his opponents, or at least decent with them

~~~~

Glass Joe

I read the first couple chapters of this fic and now it's just canon to me, he is a single girldad and there is nothing you can do to change that

Well I say "dad" but sometimes I like to make her transfemme just because I can so when I do that she's still a milf instead

Has always had fucked up bones and joints and health problems and stuff, boxing just made it CONSIDERABLY worse lol

Gabby Jay is like his uncle or something

Sleeps like 3 hours a night and hasn't drank water in like 10-20 years, this freak is living off of coffee, bread, wine, cigarettes, and NOTHING else

Tried to be blond, it didn't work on him

The only reason he haven't died in the ring is because god is punishing him for his hubris

His one win was when Nick Bruiser died in the ring due to a completely unrelated brain aneurism

Von Kaiser

Used to crossdress back in his younger years, he may not do it as much anymore but he still has his dresses

Actually enjoys his job as a boxing teacher! He likes instilling knowledge on the next generation

Complete neat freak, trys to suppress it as much as he can but it's always there in the back of his mind

Definitely has SOMETHING wrong with him but thinks that if he doesn't get it diagnosed then it's not really a problem

Probably has like prosthetics or metal implants in his joints or bones or something, idk why else he'd make the noises he does

Disco Kid

I like to think that he does drag in his free time, makes you wonder if him and VK ever talk about it

Can fully SPRINT in high heels, hell he could probably fight in them too if they'd let him

Always has at least a little bit of glitter on him, it's a curse

Boxing is more of a hobby for him than a career, he's just having fun with it

Always makes sure his friends are safe and having fun whenever they go out somewhere

King Hippo

Scares babies and small children on accident just by being around them and feels REALLY bad about it

The first time he met glass joes daughter he made her cry and still hasn't gotten over it

Whenever fans ask him for a signature he either writes it in the most beautiful handwriting you've ever seen or he just draws a lil hippo with a crown, which one you get depends on how he's feeling

Has a storage unit somewhere filled to the brim with all those shitty blenders that had to be recalled

He still tries to pawn them off on people, too, if he ever tries to get you a gift for like your birthday or something you just know it's one of those shitty blenders

Oh and the "king" in king hippo isn't a stage name, he is actual flesh and royalty. His subjects seem to think highly of him and he treats them well. He does a pretty good job running things too but to be fair his kingdom isn't all that big, just one tiny island that isn't on any maps.

He usually doesn't hold his title over people's heads, mostly he's just some guy

Fully CANNOT swim but he can hold his breath for ages and just sort of walks on the ocean floor (gee, almost like his namesake)

Knows what gender is, does not care for it

Likes to sketch and draw :)

~~~~

Piston Hondo

Possibly aromantic? I don't really know and I don't think he knows either.

God why don't I have any headcanons for him?? He's my fucking wife!!!!

Ok I KNOW I said he's my wife but i saw like one person make him and Bear Hugger queer platonic partners and im in love with that idea

I feel like of the two he's the one who was most concerned with putting labels on it and trying to figure out what exactly they were but eventually just decided that even if they're not in a romantic relationship they can still be soulmates and I think thats beautiful

Hes a sweet guy but he can be pretty awkward around people lol

EXCELLENT cook like you have NO IDEA

Bear Hugger

Does NOT know his own strength. He'll go to hug somebody and and break their ribs, he'll go to open a jar and shatter it into pieces. He's trying his best to be gentle but good god.

Also the gay kind of bear (the stage name was on purpose)

Can actually literally for real life talk to animals. No fucking clue how he does it, i guess it's just a Canadian thing

Lost his squirrel after losing in title defense and was DEVASTATED, but DONT WORRY the squirrel was fine

The "i like raw fish" line isn't about sushi, be just sticks his head in a river and comes out with a live salmon in his teeth

Great Tiger

Has at least one if not a plethora of cats (one of which is a British shorthair cause I feel like that's the kind of cat he'd like)

"I feed you, I home you, I give you all the treats and toys you could ask for, and what do you do? You scratch up my furniture and knock over all my nice cups! What do you have to say for yourself?"

"Mmmrrp?😺"

"Hmph, you're lucky you're cute..."

Magic is a difficult thing to control so sometimes when he sneezes he teleports, happesnt to the best of us

It took him weeks to fully resolidify after getting poofed my mac in title defense so for a while parts of his body were just vapor

If i ever draw him I'm gonna give him widdle kitty fangs, trust me

Still trying to work on his music career, the dumbass

Him and don like to gossip together like catty bitches

Don Flamenco

Carmen 100% tops him, I will not elaborate (at least not until I finish my fanfic)

#1 bi4bi couple ever

Whenever he drinks he literally does not shut up about her

"Me gusta mi esposa porque es suave y cálida y bonita y amable conmigo🥰🥰"

Sure, alright dude

I know it's HEAVILY implied that Carmen left him after he lost to mac the first time but I choose to think that he just lost all his self worth and was CONVINCED that she was gonna leave him

That... might actually be worse now that i think about it

But whatever, in the long run they get married and have twins and grow old together and it's great<3

She likes him better without his toupee, more room for kisses<3<3

"I'd kill someone for you, PLEASE ask me to kill someone for you..."

Hes tried on her lingerie more times than he's like to admit, it's gotten to the point where she just bought him his own. She wasn't upset about him stealing her clothes, she was upset because pink is NOT his color

Also I'm sorry that literally all of these are about him and Carmen, I didn't mean to do that

He is a complete giga bitch to everyone except her

I like it when people interpret mac as being Hispanic because I feel like he'd try and start a conversation with don and he'd be like "Lo siento, no hablo inglés. (Lying)" and mac would just be like "¡Oh, está bien! Así que, como te decía..." and dons just like GOD FUCKING DAMNIT

~~~~

Aran Ryan

He used to be normal, but then they put him in a room. A rubber room. A rubber room with rats. The rats made him crazy.

Does not know Irish and refuses to learn because it reminds him of being in school and he fucking HATED being in school

Probably because of the adhd or whatever is going on with his brain

Will break somebody's nose if they make fun of his accent

I see folks giving him a ton of siblings and I really like that idea but I just gave him one cause I thought it'd be easier lol

I named his sister Sharan cause I thought it'd be funny, she's also fucking crazy but when they're around eachother they're too busy trying to reel the other one in to be crazy themselves so they sort of balance eachother out

Shes about 6-7 years younger than than him and even though he KNOWS she can stand up for herself he's still very protective of her

When he first started boxing professionally he would bring her with him to get her out of the house (even though she didn't like seeing him get hurt)

Used to read her stories to help her go to sleep and would stay with her to protect her from monsters

Has fistfought his dad and would do so again if he wasn't dead

Soda Popinski

Literally just this post

Him and his wife that I made up have been trying for a baby but haven't had any luck so far

Gained his sweet tooth after quitting drinking (ya know cause he used to be called vodka drunkinski, god I'm so fucking clever)

Is actually a gentle giant outside of the ring!

His wife started knitting him sweaters once she saw him go out into the snow nearly naked. He loves and cherishes them and wears them every chance he gets but he still goes outside without pants🫠

Has killed someone on accident

Bald Bull

I like to think that he's a pretty chill guy when he's not being hounded by the paparazzi but god damn they will not leave him alone

He was probably glad when mac became champ for all the reasons macho man hated it

I honestly don't know what else to say about him

Fuck it I'm giving him agoraphobia

Him and popinski are pals😊

Has killed someone on purpose

Super Macho Man

I'm gonna be real, in my first draft of this post i completely forgot he existed and if he was real and he knew that he would be thinking about it for WEEKS

His ass: NOT real

His tits: NOT real

Thinks he's talking Like The Youth when he says shit like dude and bogus all the time

Also he's like 50

Definitely has at least one kid that he pretends not to know about, dodges child support like it's bullets in the matrix

Idk what social media was like in 2009 cause I was 4 years old but I like to think that people bully him online

Tried to own the "release the bogus" thing but it was just suuuuuuper cringe

Sometimes I like to make him ftm, I think it's neat

Sometimes I also like to make him fluent in asl but I got that one from a fanfic

Mr. Sandman

Comfypilled cozymaxer (at least when he's not training and stuff)

I feel like he would not be able to play any of the punch out games if they existed in his universe

I really dont know what to put here either

I like to think that under that intimidating exterior hes a real sweetie but I also said that about popinski and bb so it feels like I'm just being stupid

Give him some chamomile tea. Now.

[gophergal]

Perhaps an obvious one, but for the ship ask game – HeavyMedic? :3

"What do you mean, obvious?" I ask dumbly, looking at my laser engraved HeavyMedic coaster

What made you ship it?

Funnily enough, I do this thing when I'm considering getting into a fandom where I just kinda peruse as much of the fanworks as I possibly can. Probably very common. I saw that Heavy and Medic were a popular ship, looked into why, was rapidly convinced. Definitely helped by the similarities they have to my other Main Ships from previous fandoms.

What are your favorite things about the ship?

I'm a sucker for ships that are dangerously devoted to each other. Mostly when they're dangerous to anyone who threatens their beloved. They make each other better, have one another's back, serve as a center point of the team. I think it's really beautiful how their popularity isn't just based on secondary source material (the animations and comics), but also the gameplay itself! A good Heavy/Medic duo in game is a force the whole team can rally around, and- honestly? I've got quite a few scenes in mind inspired by Heavy/Medic pairs I've seen in game (none I was part of though lmao. Forever alone medic main)

Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

HEAVY IS NOT AN ACCESSORY TO MEDIC. THEY ARE EACH THEIR OWN CHARACTERS. THATS WHY THE SHIP IS SO NEAT. I can't STAND fic where Heavy's entire character boils down to "I Love Doktor <3". If you write it, thats fine, but man. I love Heavy, if I didnt like him as a character I most likely wouldn't be shipping Medic with him. Heavy CANONICALLY shows discomfort towards some of Medic's antics. Not only is is totally fine if they experience conflict on that front, it makes the ship more interesting. Let them argue and question if their relationship is going to make it. They dont need to be Goals to be worth shipping (though they certainly can be. Both Is Good is what I'm trying to say) While Red Oktoberfest is my favorite merc/merc pairing and I'm thus biased toward them, PEOPLE CAN SHIP HEAVY AND MEDIC WITH OTHER CHARACTERS. Even OCs. I know thats not specific to this ship, but by god do I see people try to enforce that "Heavy/Medic is CANON so you have to ship them". They are not canon. Makani's artwork that wasn't part of the published comics is Non-canon. The VAs' shipping them and making (psuedo official???) fanworks, despite how FUCKING COOL that is, doesn't make it canon. In the comics, SFMs, and games they are not explicitly shown to be or described as a couple in a romantic/sexual sense. Now, the ship is LAMPSHADED (alluded to by the creators) frequently. Which is fun! And they are meant to be close! But I feel like this very much a K/S situation. Yknow, since Gene Roddenberry was like "well, if I want Captain Kirk to be popular, then I have to make people associate him with Mr Spock, so now they're besties" then that close friendship and deep devotion read as homoeros to folks and was later alluded to by other writers of the source material? I'm not saying it had the same motivation. I don't think this was meant to be a way of making either Heavy or Medic more popular, but I do think Valve originally just wanted to depict them as a Duo. A well oiled machine. Doing so makes sense, given it mirrors how they work in the game. But over time they realized that fans picked up on homoeros undertones, and not wanting to alienate either the fans who saw HeavyMedic nor the homophobic fans (as alienating either would cut into their profits/cause a backlash), Valve began walking the tightrope of shipteasing, but not being too explicit I dont want to call it queerbaiting, because really? It's not used so much in the marketing. But it is kinda a frustrating thing to see. But uh, long yap short. I suppose my most unpopular opinion is "Red Oktoberfest isn't actually canon, even though it easily could be"

[narcolini]

white room - pt. 3

johnny davis x gn!reader, 18+, canon typical themes and language, 4k words, 3 of ? part one | part two a/n: if anyone's curious, the fics named after the song white room by cream, which was both relevant enough, and playing on spotify at the time, to be chosen for such reasons skskssk gif credit to @hausofmamadas mi amor

Friday, well, that one turns out to be a movie. Not in the romantic feeling kind of way, but in the real movie theatre with a bucket of popcorn and everything else kind of way, and you would’a never expected that from a guy like Johnny. 

Really surprised you at first, caught you so off guard that you made him say it twice when he picked you up, but then he said besides riding and racing, movies are his favourite way to spend an hour or two, which really warmed you up to the idea. And you know, he wasn’t lying, neither. Everyone likes movies in some sort of way, sure, but Johnny? He loves them. Really really. His eyes lit all the way up when he told you which one he’d picked out for you, and you didn’t mind anywhere near enough to complain or choose something else, so that’s what you ended up doing.

And on the way there, he asks what your favourite thing is, for passing time and stuff, and you tell him, well, you suppose that’d be writing. So he says, books? And you says, yeah, stories. Adventures. 

“You ever think about writing a movie script?” he asks.

And you shrug, cause you ain’t never thought about it really. “I could do.”

“Bout some guy who starts a bike club?”

“Yeah, and he thinks he’s the coolest guy around, til he meets someone cooler, that is.” 

He smiles. “Oh, yeah?”

“Yeah, someone they call Lips.”

Then he’s laughing, and not looking at all where he’s going, eyes all sticky to yours, but the road's straight, so you figure it’s alright for a little while. “It’s good,” he says, “but, ah, I don’t think it’ll make it. Won’t get the audience, you know?”

“Sucks,” you tell him, “I had a real good feeling bout that one.”

Oh, and he picked you up in his car this time too, which you ain’t never seen before. With the bikes and the trucks, you thought you had his wheels all covered, but then he pulls up in this thing—real neat looking, all black and low to the ground, but not too showy, like something he could still put his girls in, when it’s his turn or something. And you know as much about cars as you do about bikes, which is nearly fuckin’ nothin, so you couldn’t tell him anything about it, other than it looks nice, and that he was in a real surprising mood today. Keeping you on your toes, you said. 

His reason was something about not wanting to leave his bike someplace he can’t get to in a pinch, and apparently that’s the movie theatre. So, you’re sitting next to him this time, instead of clinging on like a second jacket, and talking all that crap about movie scripts while he drives you there.

You figured you’d be feeling a sort of way about the car thing, cause you were getting real used to having him in front of you, really enjoying it, you know, but side by side? Well, that’s a whole other drug. Spent the whole ride so far just looking at him. At his face, his hands. His thighs in those washed out jeans of his—cause he sits the same in a car as he does on a bike, would you believe it, his knees all spread out like that. And sure, maybe it’s not polite to eat him up so much with your eyes, but you’re listening too, and talking when he needs something from you. 

Plus, you only caught him a couple times, but he’s been looking at you as much as you’re looking at him. At your jeans and thighs as well, you reckon. Between the both of you, you’ve made the car feel like one of those Swedish sauna things on wheels, or maybe it’s just you thinking that way, but your neck is hot, real world hot, and even your brow’s a little damp too. God, if he notices the sweat on you, you’ll be opening that door and rolling out onto the road before he can shout at you to stop. 

At one point, he says, “You like the bike or the car more?”

And you say back, “Well, whichever one you like driving, Johnny,” cause the real answer is that one makes you dizzy and the other makes you act like you ain’t never seen a man before. You’re not precious neither, about what he thinks of you, but you’re not gonna go and say something that’ll make you sound like that now, are you?

By the time you’re finally getting out of that thing, you’re thinking thank God, cause you don’t know how much longer you could’ve survived without taking one of his hands off that steering wheel just to feel some part of him. Not in a freaky way, you know, just something to stop you thinking all crazy like. Some little bit of him to hold on to, like you have on the bike. 

Who would’a known that was the lesser evil of the two, right? At least when you’re pressed up against him like that he can’t look at you, all hungry and curious like he has been doing—and you can’t look at him neither, but you can feel him. All big and strong and warm. Then you don’t gotta sit and wonder like you were just then, going all crazy thinking about how it would be, how it would, well, you know. With his hands and his face and his lips and stuff. Thinking bout that, you know. 

So you get out the car, and for a few minutes you’re free, feeling normal, and he buys the tickets and the candy, and the soda that you need dowsing with, and you think, yeah, sure, you can play nice. You’re chatting and laughing just like last time. And he’s letting you go in first, cause he’s a gentleman with things like that, so it’s easy to feel like you’re a respectable person still. 

But then you’re sitting next to him again, and this time it’s in the dark, and his knees are touching yours, actually touching, cause your seats are closer in the theatre and he’s still spread out like he’s got a damn engine under him. 

Like, fuck, you feel altogether insane by the time the movie’s going. 

No other man’s ever got you like this, right? Sure feels that way at least, like you’re fifteen again, and letting the kid next door take you out for the very first time. All heart hammering and sweating like you ain’t never kept a guy’s company before. 

Johnny don’t notice of course. He’s watching the movie with both hands on his lil’ pouch of M&Ms, and every time he laughs, he’s no idea that his knee’s rubbing up on yours or that his elbow’s bouncing right into your arm. You don’t tell him though, cause these are perfectly normal things to happen on a date, right, and you wouldn’t want him to stop, you only want your brain to quit thinking all these things you ain’t got the right to know yet. 

Like how his lips are so big and pretty looking. Like they’re made for kissing, carved out just for that one thing, but they don’t make his face any less handsome, right, and you certainly wouldn’t call him pretty allover. Just, rugged, you know. Good to look at. And, Jeez, you can’t even go five minutes without something like that. Wondering what his lips are really like to kiss, or whether he’s got any more tattoos any place you can’t see. 

It’s a good thing you ain’t supposed to talk in here, cause the way this is going, something might slip out that you really shouldn’t say. So you just keep looking forward and watching the movie that you’re already losing track of. 

_____

Turns out, biting your tongue is worth it sometimes, cause about half way in you get the answer to one of those crazy questions of yours.

Only a little something, but it gets your heart going all over again. Out of nowhere, his hand goes right there on the arm rest between you, and it’s not just resting, it’s inviting, cause the palms up, you know, waiting for you. And when you don’t move, like you might not’ve seen him do it, he reaches and puts his fingers through yours until, yeah, you’re holding hands, and he’s sitting them both in the middle right where he wanted them.

Before, you’d been wondering if his hands were as rough as they looked like, and well, now you know. And they are. But that bird tattoo, that swallow by his thumb? That’s smooth as anything, and once you start feeling it, you can’t stop. Running your own thumb all over it like you’re in love or something. But his hands are a little cool, you know, compared to yours, and you guess you got some habit you can’t help, about warming things up by rubbing them all sweet like that. 

You guess you’re also feeling like he’s sort of familiar already, and that’s what you do when you hold a hand and it’s one you’re used to, right?

But how’s he got you feeling that way after doing so little? Like he’s got you holding hands and tracing swallows and thinking about his thigh against yours, when really, you’ve seen him three times and that’s it. Which is next to nothing, you know? You haven’t even kissed him properly yet. The other night, when he dropped you home, you got a peck on the cheek and a mouthful of cologne and that was that. Which you’re not complaining about, course not, it sent your heart scattering like a mouse across the kitchen floor, but normally you got a real hold of yourself at a point like this. 

Instead, here you are, acting like you know who he is and what he looks like under all the layers. Acting like maybe you wouldn’t mind so much to one day marry a sort of guy like him—if you were to marry anyone at all, that is. You figure one like Johnny wouldn’t be too bad. Quiet when he needs to be, rough looking, but nice still. Someone you couldn’t bring to your mother but would bring to an office party. It could work, you know, if you were ever really wanting something like that to work. 

Boy, you’re almost making yourself sick thinking about it. You barely know the guy and you got no interest in marrying, not any time soon, and God knows Johnny ain’t wanting that either, so what does it matter to you? You’re just thinking all sorts of things for the sake of thinking them—just to avoid thinking about all the other things that you’re trying not to think about and, yeah, you’re really going round in circles about it. If he could hear you now, he’d be leaving you right there in the dark. 

Then he breathes by your ear, and he’s whispering about the girl on screen looking like his Aunt Tina in a hair piece, and you laugh so loud the people in front turn round to shoot you with their eyes—until they see Johnny, that is. Cause then it’s right back to the screen again like they didn’t see nothing. Even in the dark, when all you can make out is what the light off the screen gives you, that jacket of his means something. One look at the leather and the patches and, whoosh. Suddenly nobody’s got the guts to say anything about it.

And the worst part? That all makes you feel even more like you’d marry him. Or someone like him, if it came up, of course. You’re even squeezing his hand a little afterwards, like you’re thanking him for it even though he didn’t do nothin. Just sat there looking mean, you know. 

But maybe you want someone sitting there looking mean. Maybe you don’t wanna be doing it for yourself no more, and are perfectly happy to let someone like Johnny do it for you.

Who knows, but you really should be watching the movie now anyhow, cause he’s gonna ask you all about it, you’re sure, and you don’t even know any of their names yet.  

_____

“So you like it?” he says after, just like you knew he would, when you’re walking back over the lot to that four wheel surprise of his. 

“Yeah, I think so.”

“What, you only think you like it?” He throws you one of them big, crumply, frowns, with a cigarette bouncing in his mouth already. “How can you not know if you liked it or not?”

“I’m still deciding,” you tell him, cause you are, cause you were distracted for most of it. But that part you’re not telling. “I know I prefer things where I can talk to you, though. Face to face and stuff.”

He don’t smile but his eyes do, and you know before he says anything, that he’s gonna say something in a real sort of a way, just to get a rise outta you. “There I was,” he says, “thinking I was doing something good, you know. Giving you a break from all that talking, Lips.”

“No way.” There it is. “That’s not stickin, Johnny.”

“Yeah…” He nods in a sorry looking way. “I kinda think it already has.” 

“And I kinda think three dates is enough. How’s that for thinkin?”

“Oh, calling it then, are you?”

“Yeah, I am.” But neither of you are pretending like you believe it, not even for a bit of a game to play; like it’s a given that you’re lying, you know, three dates and he and you both know you’re sticking around for more. No question. “You ever gonna light that thing?” you ask, pointing to the long smoke dangling over his chin. You’re at the car now and he still ain’t touched it, acting like he’s not even thought about it since he put it there.

“Was getting round to it,” he says, making no move to do anything other than standing there looking at you.   

And you’re looking right back. 

It’s dark out already, cause that movie was longer than you thought it’d be, but there’s enough street lights round here that nothin’s really hurting by it. He’s just got a little orange on him, shoulders glowing like you’re sitting with a campfire or something. 

So you lean back against his car, right on the driver’s side, and ask him what he thought of the movie, cause you can tell he’s thinking a lot on something or other, so you figure it’s probably that. And he sets off talking like you’re right, going on about one of them cowboys in particular, but you gotta admit, you're not listening to a word of it.

Real bad manners it is, really awful of you to get a guy talking and not even hear one thing he says, but Jeez, you’re just watching those lips and that cigarette and not helping yourself in any sort of way at all. You just agree and shake your head when it feels like the right thing to do—and you know you’re making it obvious, may as well be screaming kiss me, Johnny, kiss me, but he just keeps going. Talking more than you ever heard him talk about anything. 

And right when you think he might ask you something, or call you up on that look you’re giving him, he takes the smoke from his mouth and tosses it. Never even lit, clean as the day they made it, and he throws it right into that grimy little puddle there with no warning at all. He could’a kept it you know, put it back in the box and had it later, if he didn’t want it no more.

“What d’you do that for?” you ask him.

He says, “You wanna go?” 

It’s the way his voice sounds when he asks, it makes you frown a little. Like he’s upset or something. Or maybe, and most likely, he saw how rude you were being and got worked up about it, instead of going the other way. And you wanna tell him it’s not that at all, and you’re sorry, yeah, you’ll listen better now, but all you can do is shake your head at him. 

No, you don’t wanna go. What you want is—well, you’re trying to be good about it, cause he said before that you’re the first person he’s looked at in any real sort of way since Betty left, and that’s a whole load of weird, every step of the way for him, you know—but, God, what you really wanna do is kiss him. You want to kiss him. 

Guess he’s used to you by now, cause you’ve been so quiet that he notices something off about it. Then he don’t look upset, or mad, he just looks confused when he asks, “You okay?”

 Well, then you figure, screw being nice, just for a little bit. 

“I’m thinking it’s getting real hard to look and not touch,” you say.

Slips right out of you, gone without stopping, but you said it in a dazed kind of way, so it came out sort of nice, you guess. Honest without being crazy about it. And he says nothin, no surprise right, but you do catch something—yeah, right there, he goes and does it again—his eyes drop from looking at yours, to looking down at your mouth. Bingo. He’s thinking about it too. All you can do is wait it out.

After a second that feels like a minute that feels like an hour, his head shakes halfway and he says, “I don’t,” but that’s all he says, I don’t. Then he goes and pulls you into him. 

Just like that.

Two hands, either side of your face, scratchy on your cheek and cool feeling cause you got hot real fast, and then he’s kissing you. Not quick like some other guy might, but slow and careful like a man really thinking about it. Kissing you like. Well. Like nobody’s ever been kissing you before. 

You feel yourself curling in, right up close to him, and grabbing onto the edges of his jacket a little. Letting him kiss you, not the other way around, but doing all you can to keep it going, you know, cause you can tell by his lips, by the way he’s moving, he’s still sort of worrying about it. Like he knows how to but can’t remember yet, or doesn’t know if he likes your mouth enough to forget about the last one he was used to. 

And you’re not caring about anything to do with any of that, you’re just making sure you remember every bit of this, incase he decides he don’t like it after all.

But he keeps going still, and your mouth starts tasting like his mouth, which is like a load of ash and candy, cause he’s a sweet tooth, you know, who knew, and he was tossing them back like water in there. Which you’re glad of, cause somehow it’s all adding up to taste like the best sort of thing you’ve ever had, and you don’t think he’d get that title if it was just the cigarettes on his tongue.

When he pulls back—and God, you fight him on it—you make a noise like he hurt you. Embarrassing, right? A little whimper like an animal, or something, and that makes him keep you real close for a sec, just to be sure he didn’t actually hurt you somehow. Then you’re both saying “sorry” at the same time, for some reason. Sorry, you know, over nothin. 

And that’s dumb enough that you laugh right up against his lips, and he breathes in a lazy sort of way, all heavy like he’s not had his fill yet. 

Well, you’re already standing straight again and letting go of his jacket, cause it seems impolite to be tugging on him like that now he’s waiting a little, and one of his hands moves to your neck like he’s trying to leave but can’t make his body listen to his head. 

Course, you don’t mind either way. He could have another, or he could shove his hands in his pockets and rush you into the car, and you wouldn’t complain one bit because now you know. You know what it’s like. 

You’re smiling still too, while he looks at you all hungry like, and you know it’s in your mouth and your eyes and the way you find yourself saying to him,

“Take me home?”

Which is the wrong fuckin’ thing to say apparently, because his hands drop off you so quick it almost stings. Like you were never hot, he was, and now he ain’t there holding you the cold is real sharp feeling. Then he steps back a bit, and he’s clearing his throat and rubbing his nose with his knuckles, and you figure you’ve scared all of that right back out of him again.

“You know,” he says, like it really hurts him to say it, “I—I can’t. I mean. I don’t wanna rush into nothin with us, you know?” 

“I know,” you tell him. “Who’s rushing anything?”

You watch him scratch the back of his neck—always itching when he’s trying to get outta something, yeah, you seen him do it enough times already—and he’s screwing his face up like you ain’t getting it, and he can’t think of any way to put it that'll help. “We should probably, I mean.”

“You gonna tell me you don’t wanna date me no more?” you ask him.

Which is funny, cause you said that before he kissed you, and neither of you meant it then, but now there’s a little sour guy in your gut saying maybe, just maybe, you know. 

“No, no.” He shakes his head, voice all whiny like it actually is hurting. 

“Well what is it then?”

“I know how you get, yeah…you, when it gets like that. Taking you home, staying over. I mean," and then he says, "I can’t give you a life, you know?”

You stare at him real hard. “Did I ask you to?”

“Not yet, but,” he shrugs, “I’ve done all that before.”

A part of you is thinking, God, worrying about all that already? This guy’s a real piece of work. But the sensible part thinks, yeah, you too, even if you weren’t really thinking in any serious kinda way—plus he’s got a divorce two steps behind him, so why wouldn’t he be worrying about it? He’s figuring all this out like it’s brand fuckin’ new, and all the while trying to make sure you’re not getting cut up in the process. A little early on, sure, but that’s what you gotta do, right? Clear the gutter out before the rain comes.

So you tell him, “I only wanna spend time with you, Johnny.”

And he thinks on that, looking like he don’t believe anyone could ever say it and mean it, then he says, “S’pose that’s alright then, if that’s what it is.”

And you say, “Yeah, that’s what it is.” 

And when he drives you home, he’s got one hand on the wheel, and the other on his thigh, and you put your pinky round his like you’re scared of holding it proper. Scared of touching him like you’re used to doing it, and scared of him dropping you off without saying nothing else at all. Just your pinky and his pinky, and the radio on quiet like you’re dreaming, or something. 

But then it comes to it, and you get another taste of candy and ash right under your porch light.

It’s short and a little polite, like Mrs Saccone might be watching, but that don’t matter, cause you figure it means he’s decided you’re alright spending time with him still. Not rushing into nothing, yeah? 

He’s half-way down the steps again when he says, “See you tomorrow, Lips,” and he don’t even know if you’re free for him or not. Which you guess means you haven't scared him off at all, if that’s what it is. 

_________________

part four >>>>>>>

taglist: @garbinge @drabbles-mc @ashlingiswriting @raven-black102 @lyralu91 @hoodeddreams13 @businesscalamity

[muttering-folklore]

(I punch a hole through your wall)

HI MICK 😡😡 HOW ARE YOU, I HOPE YOURE DOING OKAY😡‼️

I'd like to request more Clopin Headcanons because the last ones were really awesome (maybe some Headcanons for Phoebus as well?) ok that's all BYE

HEY?????? MY FUCKING WALL!!!!!!! WHAAT

(i’m doing okaaaaay i hope you are as well)

also ew no how DARE you request headcanons from me especially after you broke my wA— HEY NO DONT GO UNDER THE CUT THEYRE DEFINITELY NOT UNDER THERE. HEY. HEY—

CLOPIN HCSSSSS

he probably has to make his own paint for his injuries and dye for his jester clothes out of plants (i’m not VERY knowledgeable about this but i know they used like. flowers and shit back in the day) so he’s probably pretty good at identifying different types of plant and knowing what colour they’d make when crushed and turned into paint or dye or ink or whatever. probably sells any excess pigment he makes to people for extra cash

pierced his own ear one night. wasn’t even dared to do so he was literally just like “hell yeaaahhh earring time”

double jointed or uncannily flexible. a borderline contortionist. constantly doing tricks and backflips and general annoying gymnastics stuff because it’s incredibly easy for him to do so and also because his Bones Ache if he sits still for more than 3 seconds. i think someone pointed out you barely see him walk or run bc hes always just tumbling around

cant read very well & can only really write a couple names (including his own) so he has someone write his lyrics down for him via dictation if he wants to record them. doesn’t rlly bring it up a lot & occasionally plays it for laughs but he’s secretly a little annoyed other people find it easy to learn how to read & write

he has kids but he doesn’t interact with them much when they’re outside of the court because he doesn’t want to put them under any danger considering he’s like.. the leader/scapegoat of the Rromani. i saw someone say that if someone was referred to as a “king” then that was typically someone sacrificed so the other Rromani people could flee semi-safely & i thought it was a neat idea so i adopted it into my belief system. it was explored in a fic i read that i thought was super good i’ll link it in the replies

was the one to Acquire djali and wasn’t rlly sure what to DO with him. mentioned possibly eating him as a last resort maybe and esmeralda was like ABSOLUTELY FUCKING NOT and took the goat in 😭

captain feeble my loved and beloathed

mentioning the sequel off the bat IM SORGY but i feel like he was secretly super relieved when zephyr didn’t show any interest in wanting to join the army/had an interest in juggling/took after esmeralda etc. has horrible ptsd (canon in the musical) and would not wish for anybody to experience what he did on anybody, even his worst enemy. he struggles sleeping sometimes because he’s plagued with nightmares, especially after the siege on the notre dame. all the noise and sights of the people fighting were almost too familiar to him.

talks to achilles. little things like ranting to him after a bad situation with someone, filling him in on their daily schedule/what they have to do that day. he’d also spend hours grooming him and making him look pretty because it’s both relaxing AND satisfying. soldiers typically had very strong bonds with their horses for getting through war together so ik that horse is basically his bestie. he’d walk into his & esmeralda’s house during spring or summer when achilles is shedding hair like crazy and just get horse hair everywhere LMFOAO esmeralda would make him sweep it up. he’d also probably sell the hair or use it in pillows and mattresses or whatever as stuffing :)

its a fairly popular hc in fics (at least the ones ive read) where if he loses his job as captain he does little odd jobs or physical labour tasks and i think it’s absolutely so true. he’s literally down for anything. you’d say you have a job for someone to do and he’d just bound over like I’LL DO IT before you even tell him what it is he’s signing up for. he’s literally not picky at all & will just gladly do jobs other people would instantly refuse to do

straying into a semi romantic area here but like… carding your fingers through his hair is essentially his shut-off button. if he’s fighting sleep and you do that? oh brother. he’s gone. he’s not waking up for a solid 9 hours. extra brownie points if you hum to him while you do so.

it’s like he has a 6th sense for danger. if one of his friends (or zephyr tbh) are doing something kinda stupid that’ll lead to injury or tears at the very least he’ll just sort of…… Know. and maybe join in, activity-depending. he’ll rock up all “wtf are you doing you’ll get hurt” and then be like “wait lmao that seems super fun. can i join in.”

evilly projecting onto him but he cannot wear a hat without looking ridiculous. his helmet is literally the only exception to that rule.

he lets esmeralda shave him because of that “i just shaved!” line from when they first met. it’s really sweet but he cANNOT STOP BEING AFFECTIONATE so it takes a legitimate age for them to finish. he’s just looking up at esme like “🥺🥺🥺 you look so good today babe you look so nice.” and she’s holding a razor like “stfu and stop trying to kiss me you’re getting your ye olde shaving foam EVERYWHERE. let me do this”

[orangepanic]

Any tips for writing Iroh II? I wanted to put him in a fic of mine but LoK gives us so little to work with, but I’ve seen you’ve done so much with him in your works.

Any advice would be appreciated <3

Wow, I'm honored (get it?) you reached out! I love Iroh II very much - obviously - and am always excited to see him included in other fics.

The thing is, as you said, there's so little in canon that you can honestly do whatever you want. I have my own headcanons about him but they're just that, headcanons, and there's no right or wrong answer here. I've seen him written very differently by different authors and no one take is more valid than another. Go nuts.

That said, I do think there are some characteristics that can be inferred from his small on-screen presence.

He doesn't talk a lot. Compared to his total screen time he has very few lines, and all of his lines are very functional and spoken to others (as opposed to monologue). Ergo, I consider Iroh an introvert who processes a lot internally rather than someone who is chatty and gregarious.

He has short hair and is in the United Forces, not a topknot serving in the Fire Navy. He mentions his mother and grandfather but doesn't share any screen time with them. Therefore, I think Iroh has a complicated relationship with the Fire Nation and is someone comfortable with or even seeing to break with tradition.

Iroh both acts bravely and respects bravery. In nearly every scene he's in he puts himself in physical danger. He notes Bumi is "one of the bravest commanders." He also nearly dies many times over trying to save his and Bumi's troops. So, Iroh is someone who sees his and others service primarily as protection and will not hesitate to physically put himself in front of others. The Avatar RPG even says "expect to see General Iroh leading from the front." I also interpret this as him having somewhat low self-esteem, or at least a reckless disregard for his own safety.

Iroh will bend the rules but not break them and is quick to adapt. In book 1 he essentially goes rogue because there is no one to stop him, and pivots his strategy several times: on the ship when the fire cannons can't hit the planes, after Korra leaves with Mako, and again after he, Asami, and Bolin are captured. In book 2 he instantly devises a strategy of military exercises to support Korra's cause, then casts it aside as soon as Raiko orders him not to but tells Korra to go to the Fire Nation. In book 4 he mounts a defense a week early with four hours' notice, then surrenders to Kuvira when ordered but tells Korra to run for it even though the Avatar's surrender was included in the order because he knows he reports to Raiko but she doesn't. So, I conclude Iroh is very smart but also knows what he can and can't get away with, would generally prefer to do what he considers the right thing and will tell others to do what he can't when he's stopped, and will defend his actions on technicalities.

He doesn't change his clothes. In book 1 his uniform is soaking wet and shredded. Yet except for his missing sleeve, he's immaculate. Buttoned up, cravat knotted, medals attached. Could Gommu have scared up another outfit? Almost certainly. But Iroh says no. Compare this to Bumi's unbuttoned dishevelment and I think it's safe to infer that Iroh is a neat and clean individual who holds the image of his office in high regard. This is the kind of guy who folds his socks and labels his leftovers and never forgets to shave.

Dude is hot. Hottttttt. Yet there's no mention of a Mr. or Mrs. Fire Nation, and he's not exactly hitting on anyone on screen. So, Iroh is either shy or socially awkward or married to his job or finds himself in some other way unfit for companionship or - in my writing - often all four.

From the above I get an intelligent, brave, intellectually agile, determined, ambitious, orderly individual who thinks before he speaks, is somewhat alone in the world, and is ready and willing to die to protect others both because it aligns with his own values and because he sees himself as somewhat disposable. If there's an attack, he's between whatever it is and innocent people. If there's a party, he's in the back of the room wondering how soon he can leave. If there's a job to do, he's working at it until it's done to his satisfaction or he's directly ordered to stop, in which case he'll secretly tell someone else to do it instead.

Anyway, that's more or less how I wound up with my characterization of Iroh II. Happy writing! I'm excited to see what you come up with.

[kairos-polaris]

I have a lot of thoughts and opinions on jonelias and I was encouraged to share them, so here some things about how I see them/what I want from them in fics/how I write them in order of most to least important

the first two are equally important but I see the first one more so I'll start with it

1. Names

I am very particular about names so it's important to me the way Jon and Jonah call each other

I've talked about it before but it's so important to me that Elias calls Jon by his name. which he does canonically! he calls Jon by his name all the time!! so I am a bit annoyed when in fics Elias calls Jon Archivist every sentence. the exception for it is "my Archivist" but not if it's overused, then it doesn't hit the same

same for Jon calls Jonah Elias post reveal. I prefer the canon version of Jon calling him Jonah. it's an acknowledgement of the person Jonah has always been, the person Jon actually liked and then hated, not the man he never met

2. Elias' attitude towards Jon

it's vital to me that Elias isn't casual when it comes to Jon. I've read a couple of fics when he is casual about Jon and their relationship and I was like :((((

this might be me being sentimental but also I just don't think Elias would risk his plans by getting involved with Jon if he was casual or normal about him. it just doesn't make sense. for what purpose? showing that he has power over Jon? or that he controls him? I don't think it fits his character honestly. Elias is a passive observer first and foremost, he serves the Eye not the Web for a reason

3. Obsession

they should be obsessed with each other, not normal at the very least. Jon refuses to acknowledge that he is obsessed with his boss and keeps insisting their relationship is normal (no one believes him). Elias is aware and doesn't even try convincing people he isn't obsessed with Jon. maybe even claiming Jon in front of other avatars without Jon even realising it

4. Mutual interest

this one isn't as vital but I do want them to be like this 👁️👁️ when it comes to the other. both Elias and Jon should want to inspect the other under a microscope

Jon's interest can be less intense later on but he canonically deeply respected Elias and knew there was more to him than a mild mannered boring manger he presented himself as ("Elias is a difficult man to pin down" I bet Elias was extremely flattered, that his Archivist was paying attention and seeing what he painstakingly tried to conceal)

this is more about me not liking Peter Lukas but it's important to me that Elias is more interested in Jon than he has ever been with Peter. that his interest is so blatantly obvious (read one fic where Elias cheated on Jon with Peter and I was like 😟 nooooo)

also now that I think of it, I don't mind them being interested in someone else but I do need them to prioritise each other (exception is jondaisy but that's because my coolest mutual ships them and loves Daisy and I love their take on their relationship and Daisy)

5. Liking each other

this one isn't that important but I think it's neat when they just like each other as people, when they have shared interests, when they can talk for hours about the most random topics. and also Jon ranting to Elias and knowing he listens and is actually interested

hear me out, hear me out, if Elias postponed ending the world they could totally have some peaceful domestic relationship (am now thinking about them being married pre canon and having a comfortable relationship but everything else is canon and Jon spends season 3 wondering if anything about their life together was true and then one day in season 4 learning that it was real and true and Elias wasn't lying when he said his vows or when he said he loves Jon)

5. Sexless sex

while I enjoy je smut (especially the ones that include Jon being ace) sexless Eye sex is everything to me. and mind meld. anything involving telepathy and Beholding kink

whether it's them staring at each other (unnerving everyone else in the room) or Elias watching Jon read/take a statement or maybe even Jon compelling Elias or taking a statement from him. I love it all

Beholding is like a third in their relationship. To Me