#ABOUT IMMEDIATELY SPLATTED THEM.

[gamerdot]

average grizzco employee when you say 'this way!'

[splaboon]

people that are serious about video games are so confusing to me because I go into every game with the same monkey brain mindset. No strategy, no fine motor skill, and an endless thirst for blood

[worldsewage]

Hehe may I ask about evil Callie?

(The evil/brainwashed) Callie here functions a bit differently… as I also use her to explore what exactly mud mouths are… and the octarian’s relationship with their ally, Salmonids…

Explanation under the cut. 🚧

Due to constrained relations between them and the other main dominating species— (salmonid/octarian vs inklings)— most Inklings, namely younger generations, are more desperate to fix and mend the relationship.

(There is plenty more to this! But I don’t want to make this come across as far more convoluted than it needs to be, so here have this for now:📒)

Octavio contacted Callie directly, albeit in secret, telling her that he has plans that would be a step forward in ending the tension between the Inklings and Octarian-Salmonid groups. What he had introduced was a new type of “ink” that would make their species “salmonid friendly”, and he wanted Callie to be the one to be the first public appearance with this new Ink in hopes to reach a wider audience…

Most of that isn’t true— but to Callie— who is a direct descendant of a war leader, was raised as an agent, and lives in a fairly dangerous city zone that floods, that sounded like a better step towards a better life, and she went for it.

This ink is known as MUD— and this “ink” isn’t technically ink at all, as mentioned in a previous post, most inks are a synthetic toxic poison, designed for warfare, but this ink on the contrary, wasn't designed by Inkfish, it was designed by Salmonids.

MUD is a slimy corrosive ink designed to rival Inkfish’s ink, namely in salmon runs and Ink Wasted territories, one that blends into the grounds and spreads out quickly and efficiently much like Inkfish ink, but one that corrodes Inklings by absorbing into them, and leaves salmonids completely safe from any burning effects.

The Octarian were the ones tasked with creating this new bio-weapon, as an added benefit being it would not affect their species, (they would be safe from it regardless, considering Salmon-Runs are an Inkling exclusive event, and Octolings were surprised when they learned about them.)

They tried different methods of testing it, and ultimately, the project failed— Mud uses both Salmonid and Inkling DNA in its creation, and when Mud was being developed, it melted Salmonids like Ink typically does due to its hyper-corrosive nature, but because it carried Inkling + Salmonid DNA, the salmonid’s skin would attempt to mimic the properties of inklings and constantly try to reconstruct itself into the “swim” form, which made Salmonids a walking (or rather, squirming) sludge, these monsters became known as MUDMOUTHS, and are not truly considered alive, since they run exclusively on the Running Instinct that exists in Salmonid DNA.

And in turn, when the ink was absorbed into Inklings— the previously noted “running instinct” would have an almost Kraken-Esque affect on inklings before corroding and splatting them.

The running instinct would work as intended, everything they eat immediately converts to growth in preparation for an arduous journey, they’re extremely aggressive, and they have a desire to return to the salmonid birthplace.

Mud would splat inklings upon prolonged contact, but Inklings who were test subjects for mud were slowly injected with Mud over a course of time. These subjects were disoriented and had a sort of “positive” aggressive attitude that didn’t falter even in the face of family or friends.

They are easy to persuade and it’s unclear if this is due to the pain of getting the ink-content in their bodies replaced by this synthetic fake-ink, or if the running instinct muddles their thoughts. It’s probably a healthy mix of both.

Dj Octavio, kept Callie by his side, since in her current state her mind would be too fogged up to dispute or make sense of what he’s making her do.

He planned on using Callie to stir up trouble in Inkopolis solely for the sake of rising tension. Octavio is constantly searching for reasons to make Inkling’s an enemy in the eyes of everyone who sees them, and painting Callie— a well known public figure; a known descendant of Captain Cuttlefish— as vicious would do wonders for allowing most people to view the Octarian as a force that would more desirably be backed up, it would reinforce their armies. And make them overall stronger if people felt they had reason to target Inklings.

He didn’t get this far due to Agent Four’s interference.

But, he got to accomplish many theft missions using Callie— which included robbing Inkopolis of some of the Zapfish Generators, which are giant machines that are powered thanks to the Zapfish, and thanks to the Zap-Ink— ⤵️

(Above image is from here) — Octavio was able to use said generators to restore power to many of the war-affected bio-domes that have been obsolete for decades, WITHOUT the need for a Zapfish.

But his reasoning can still be dumbed down to a petty move on Octavio’s part— who despite having a safer ground in the domes due to a good trade relationship with Salmonids and a vast space away from water— he still feels bitter about losing the remaining lands. And because of this the Octarian are plenty more war driven, and they are more likely to easily fall to the fervor of these schemes and battles.

[yanderenightmare]

incel Shiggy roofying his big-titted cheerleader crush at a party!!! she’s sound asleep while he’s fucking her little cunny raaawwwww 😭😭😭pleeeeeeeeeez

BNHA ! THIRST

Shigaraki Tomura x f!darling

TW: yandere, noncon/dubcon, NSFW, incel, roofying, sex while darling's unconscious, somnophilia, Shiggy is very naughty in this, darling has big breasts

CHEERS

He’s coolheaded but nervous as hell, locking the door behind him quietly – eyes shifty, heart pounding, hands sweaty, pants heavy.

He shoved his hand into his pocket and pulled out the condom he’d been saving for you… but after turning around and seeing you lie there, oh-so-very still – soft body sound asleep on the bed - he thought it would be a waste and dropped the rubber on the floor instead. 

Swallowing thickly, his cock made a jump, perking up even more at the thought of fucking your unprepped little cunny raw – tip leaking pre just thinking about it – straining in an almost painful bulge against his clothes while his head burned with the vile thoughts of what he planned on doing to you.

He stepped out of his sneaks and nearly tripped shuffling off his cargos, slipping his fingers beneath the band to his boxers and sliding those down his thighs as well – his thickness springing free with an eager kick as he left it all in a heap on the floor before getting onto the bed.

His drugs had you knocked out good – so good, only a teensy soft croon escaped your parted lips as he clambered on top of you. 

He poked the inside of his cheek with his tongue, staring down at your resting face – breaths short and heavy as he rubbed over his cockhead with his fingers, catching the sticky slick that had formed there before motioning the digits toward your mouth – stuffing them past your plump lips. He made sure to wipe the cum on your tongue – watching you moan with gleeful eyes as you unconsciously sucked the skin clean.

He shuddered at the sight, playing with the wet muscle with another fist wrapped tight around his shaft – breaths getting tighter – red eyes big while scanning your body, helplessly spread open under him. High gym socks squeezed into the chub of your midthighs while he hiked your short cheer skirt up around your tummy, leaving only a thin panty separating him from your smooth-shaven cunt.

He didn’t waste much time. Swallowing the drool pooling beneath his tongue while clammy hands reached out to grip the lace, clumsy in his haste when tugging it down your thighs and legs and off at your feet. He put the tiny article to his face and indulged in a shamelessly perverted sniff – feeling his abdomen roar in return.   

Eyes, steamy and dulled as more pearls pilled from his reddened tip when looking at your sweet little exposed slit. He wrapped his shaft with your panties and put his weeping cock-head right where he’d taken them off – in a soft kiss to those puffy pussylips – splitting them apart to smear his spillage over your clit and entrance – almost immediately beginning to push. 

“Come on- let me in.” He groaned, frustration already lacing his voice, turning it into something desperate – almost resembling a whine as he continued nudging against your taut opening, trying to press his plush bulging head inside with little kindness – except for a fat blob of spit he let drip off his tongue – landing in a splat right on your clit and slowly sliding down to where he tried to fit.

It wasn’t much, but it proved to be just enough – making you jerk with a tiny sound of discomfort as your hole finally gave and received the first inch. 

“There you go~” He choked out in relief, hands gripping the swell of your hips, eagerly glaring down at the lewd sight – where lubed with a mix of saliva and precum, he kept sinking inside the tight space one fat inch at a time. 

Your thighs strained at the intrusion, trying to wind shut to protect yourself even in your sleep – but it achieved little less than making Shiggy smile. 

He sighed in awe, offering a low and amused hum while effortlessly pushing them back in their place – his red eyes dazed, misty while looking at your little hole swallow him up, so tight and so tense at the stretch where his big cock bullied its way forth until he was all the way inside – balls-deep, nestled tight against your womb. 

“Touchdown~” He cheered in a drawl, mocking the way you squeal for football players after scoring, pumping your silly pompoms in the air with a high kick and bright smile – jumping up and down with pudgy tits bouncing in your tiny cheer outfit. 

He feared you would change out of the skimpy articles after the game. But lucky him, you hadn’t even showered. You were all ribboned pigtails and glitter makeup still, dewy and sweet-smelling from dried sweat and perfume. Dirty with greenery from the field and booze from the pep rally and soon to be made absolutely trashed and filthy with his spunk in your cunt.

He groaned, still remaining buried in all the way, liking how you snatched him tight, clinging to his length like a virgin – but soon pulled out. Rocking back from the deepest part of you, he watched you hang onto and writhe at every ridge and vein before his bulging head popped out with a wet shlick. 

You’d glossed him nicely with pussyjuice, made his cock warm and wet. 

He smiled, fingers pinching your hole open – watching it flutter from the absence of his meat – body sagging forward at the pretty sight as he got down low until his mouth was on your muff with dewy huffs – tongue sticking out and sliding through your slit with a breathy shudder.

Hands grabbed fistfuls of the chunk of your ass, pulling you snug around his face while he munched – sucking your bud into his mouth and in between his teeth – hearing you give the softest little moan in regard.

His heart drummed a rushed beat in his chest at your taste, so sweet and so naughty, driving him crazy �� but he was going to take it nice and slow. He planned on having a good long time with you – wanted to leave traces of himself all along your body for you to find once waking up.

He got back up in position. No mind to bother wiping his chin except with his tongue out and gliding across his lips for any excess as he sunk back inside you with a content sigh. 

Even wetter after his lathering, you took him in with ease – accepting it only with a pretty moan.

His hands left the squeeze of your thighs and reached for the straps on your shoulders, pulling them down until your heavy breasts flopped out. They were fatty and firm little things – big handfuls of plush down, soft and honkable in his grip. 

He couldn’t count how many times he’d fisted his cock at the thought of sliding between them. “Mmh~ I’mma do that later- right now ’m gonna make these cheer titties bounce ‘n’ jump up and down for me~” He moaned in a frenzied giggle. “You’re gonna root for me as I drive a goal right into your teensy tiny hole~ give you a nice warm creampie to help you dream sweet~”

He placed one hand on each tit, pinching your sweet stiff nips between his thumb and index finger, and then he picked up the pace – cock driving in deep, ramming your cervix, lingering there in that plush warmth for a brief but full second, before swiftly pulling out – pounding you good and hard enough to elicit moans despite you still being out-cold.

Your cunt started to squelch, and he couldn't believe it – he think he might have just made you cum in your sleep – the way your hips softly lolled and gummy walls started milking him tight, fluttering around the size of him – lovingly enough to make him buckle over – his face panting against the pillow next to your head, drowning in it while your cunt cuddled him tight in your orgasm.

He made a pathetic sound, and soon he was spurting too – unable to hold back any longer – hips stuttering, dick deep while shooting rope after thick warm rope inside you – his mouth gaping against your cheek, grunting as he stormed your cunt to drive his cum in deeper. Emptying himself inside your heat for a good minute and fucking the leakage back into you for an even better minute, and then, just to keep his cock warm while his breath evened, he kept you propped for yet another one.

He sloshed his cock out after a while – still bone-hard and standing although numb post-nut, yet so sensitivehe made himself hiss when touching it. 

He lazed off of you, feet prickling against the cool floor as he rose up – looking at you and your poor sore cunt he’d just pounded into climax. You were still pulsing from it, hole spasming – drooling with his thick white load, spilling out and onto the sheets beneath.

“Bet that felt nice~” He grinned warmly, reaching a hand down to squish your lips apart as he bowed to lick the insides of your mouth with a hungry moan, tasting the sweet mix of your spit and the fruity drink he’d slipped the pills in earlier – before pulling back with a slurp and motioning his cock to your face. 

It was messy with slick and cream and cum, and just aching to get inside the sweet welcoming warmth of your mouth.

He bit his lip, sucking his teeth while playing with the blubber of your lips with the glossy tip of his cockhead – making you kiss it so sweetly. He nearly lost balance from the sight – fever pounding in his head, making sweat pill beneath his bangs, which now clung to his skin in wet meanders. His sounds wavered, feeling the pressure and pulse of arousal surging in his loins, heavy in his gut and burning with desperation in his length as he pushed into the softness of your mouth, sliding along the wet runway of your tongue and getting sucked down the choke of your tight little throat.

“Yes- yes- yess-” Poured from him in strings of drool he no longer had the mind to swallow. Cupping your cheek in his palm as he pumped in and out of your mouth – his jaw hanging open with unfiltered sounds, watching with awe how you suckled him clean and seemed to beg for a warm mouthful of his jizz.

He had to throw his head back so as not to lose his semblance, grabbing your tit as an additional anchor – feeling your soft tongue lick the spine and your pillowlips pucker on his girth – being such a sweet slut in your sleep – worshipping his cock like that.

He pulled and pinched your nipple, and you seemed to like it – moaning around his member with eyes closed in bliss like a little whore, gagging once he got a little too eager and fucked a little too deep. “Oh, it’s coming, little cheer-slut~ don’t worry your sleepy little head ~” He crooned, a hand tangled in your hair while fucking the pocket of your cheek in slow strokes – smiling at the cute sight of it bulging.

He found your undies again, raising them to his nose once more to breathe in the sweet, rich tones of your scent – sighing out in pleasure – but no, he couldn't cum yet. He still hadn't fucked your tits like he promised.

Leaving your mouth, he swung a leg over you and seated himself on your stomach. And pinned beneath him like that, it wouldn’t even have mattered if you’d suddenly woken up. But you didn’t stir – still lying there peacefully with a smile of slick on your face. He chuckled softly and bunched up your tits, pressing his spit-slicked rod between them – watching himself poke out the other end of your cleavage with a gleam in his eyes – mouth parting with a happy smile.

And they were so soft – plush like cotton and velvety smooth, taking his cock so good where he slid through them like butter. He groaned, gripping them tighter in his fists, giving them greedy squeezes as he plowed between them.

Swollen nipples he’d tugged one too many times were big and throbbing, making you whine and whimper small drowsy sounds as he kept on messaging them – pinched tight between his finger and thumb.

You made a greater sound once he pulled on them – mouth apart in a cry which immediately made the knot in his gut tug – balls clenching, wanting to capsize – the need for release strumming along his veins.

He leaned back on his calves, cock aimed up into the air, planning on showering you with the next batch. Fapping the long shaft in quick desperate jerks until he exploded for the second time – shooting it all over your tits and face.

Leaning forward again, breaths dramatic – he pumped and dumped the rest of the load out into your mouth. Carefully now, with lazy movement, he kept leisurely stroking his length like a pet – soothing and congratulating him on a good job as he watched his fine work. Splotches of creamy white splattered on your pretty skin, now melting down your curves and drying in place. 

It was a peaceful thing to watch… but his cock was hard and hungry still.

He looked at his watch, earning his smile. He had a lot more time left. 

The party downstairs was only barely getting started and would continue for several hours until morning. People always go crazy after winning a game – and for once, he was just as thrilled as everyone else.

Maybe next, he’d make a cumdump of your little cheer-butt too.

tip-jar: Kofi

[rassicas]

In the splatoon fanbase, there are many misconceptions surrounding the relationship between inklings and water. without fail whenever I mention something related to the topic I'll get replies of "actually the canon is [some popular but incorrect theory]" "no they can do this and this canonically [it's actually a headcanon]" "no its really [something NOA made up]"

so to briefly go over The Facts:

Inklings canonically die when submerged in water. And yes, getting "splatted" is them dying for real, respawning is also an in-universe thing that has existed for at least 2000 years and not just a game mechanic. While the dying in water thing originally came from a game mechanic, it has been repeatedly stated that they incorporated this into the inkling's biology. The water weakness is not because of the water itself being toxic. The reason is based in osmosis. in the process of their evolution, Inklings (and octolings) changed a lot, and one of these changes was the ability to transform between a humanoid and swim form. Doing this transformation requires skin that is a thin, semi permeable membrane [this kind of skin is a trait found in real life molluscs]. The evolutionary trade off is that, because of how semi permeable their skin is, the ink inside of their bodies will bleed out when in contact with another liquid. This is the answer given directly by the series' creator. Kind of like how a slug will die if you sprinkle salt on it (for a reason that's almost the same as the inklings), but ultimately needs salt in its diet through the food it eats to live, inklings do drink water and other liquids. Its also not like they touch water and immediately explode, it seems they can wash their hands in it and dip their feet in it and be fine. Some people think the water weakness is stupid, personally i think its reasonable because Inkling biology is already weird as hell and of how ridiculously advantageous it is to be an ink-based cephalopod. the ink gives them the ability to jump absurdly long distances and cheat death to an extent. they're not losing much by not being able to dunk themselves in water. Anyway point is it sucks that all the relevant canon information on this is one of those japan only things/exclusive to developer interviews and pretty much every time it's brought up in English the localizers make shit up. I plan to make a video about this one of these days, but with how 'controversial' the topic is, and how many little details and connected concepts there are, I've been holding it off because I want to do it right. there's also some specific details that are unclear that I've been hoping would be clarified in the artbook or a dev interview but haven't, I might just have to go for it at this point. for the time being, i hope this post helps clear up a few things!

[koolades-world]

Can you do some crack headcanons for Obey Me where some accident causes MC to temporary get wings that are not only huge af but also let them fly super fast? Like a singular flap could cause MC to almost bump into the ceiling at Diavolo's castle alone. They can also zoom through the air at high speeds and you can just hear the "ZYOOOOOM"

One thing I can imagine is Lucifer teaching MC how to fly and immediately regretting it cuz he's the only one who can get even remotely close to them when they're flying and MC finds it funny to fly away from him(it's also out of fear of what will happen once he gets them)

hi! haha yeah of course! this is too funny can kinda imagine mc going splat like a in a cartoon LOL

let's set the scene: solomon fed you something weird that he cooked up in a cauldron after promising you something you want, and this makes you grow these super large, super strong wings. he swears they'll go away eventually, but it's up to you if you believe that or not. how does your man react?

Mc with temporary wings

Lucifer

kinda like a disapproving dad for accepting yet another strange potion from solomon

despite this, he takes you under his wing (haha get it?) and teaches you how to control them

once you get comfortable, you invite him to play games that he pretends he doesn't have time for but always joins in on. he secretly really enjoys having someone to

gosh,,, sky tag 🥺 the silly potential is endless since in the sky, there are no expectation for either of you

Mammon

probably also would have taken that offer from solomon

as another wing haver, he can help you out a little

the first time he tried to give you lessons, you accidentally smacked him in the face and sent him into the wall behind you

after that, he’s much more careful, and once you get the hang of it, he's teaching you his crafty ways

Levi

manages to reference at least three different animes he's seen around the situation

he thinks your wings are so cool but won't admit it

at one point, he takes you diving at Siren Beach for fun since you would be able to move through the water quickly with the large wings. lotan joins and you end up finding lots of cool stuff!

afterwards, he helps you dry off your wings since that wasn't exactly something you thought about before you got in the water

Satan

he's quick to ask solomon about how he made the potion out of curiosity

also asks if he can study your wings and watches you as you learn to fly

kinda goes science mode on you

since he knows how tiring carrying around that new weight must be, so he gives you lots of tasty food to replenish your energy, and offers you massages! (he learnt from simeon, the best)

Asmo

over the moon! he thinks they're so beautiful and almost wants to ask solomon to give him a pair too

he will accessorize you even if you run away, so expect lots of him hustling after you with all his ribbons and bows in hand

"Mc, sweetie, you're gonna look so cute!" is holding the ugliest old lady esque bows ever

teaches you all his favorite arial tricks even though both of you realize early on that you don't have the agility required with how large your wings are

Beel

can't comprehend how fast you are with those things

even though he also has wings, you fly circles around him with yours (if you even have the control for that)

quickly introduced you to aerial sports and the two of you find games to play together, even though it's kinda hard considering how different your wings and skillsets are

since they're only temporary, he wants you to make the most of them, and takes you sight seeing!

Belphie

you're literally just a pillow as far as he's concerned now

they're perfect for wrapping himself in and if you wanted, you could hide the two of you in them

when you're practicing flying, he yells out all sorts of useless "useful" tips, such as not to run into something you've already hit

he just sits on the sidelines, wrapped in a blanket, watching lazily amused

[cameronspecial]

Let Me Do It, Angel

Pairing: Frat!Rafe Cameron x Reader

Warnings:  Dangerous Stunts

Pronouns: She/Her

Word Count: 1.0K

Summary: Alpha Epsilon Pi love their dangerous antics, but Y/N is there to make sure Rafe does them safely.

Masterlist

Rafe grew up in the Outer Banks as a Kook. He got to do crazy, dangerous and illegal stunts all the time without any consequences. Add to the fact that he was a single guy and it was sure to be a recipe for disaster. However, when he got his Angel, his frat brothers would say he became the complete opposite. It is an over-exaggeration because he still does the risky stunts. The only difference: he does it a little more safely for his girl. One example is the famous cliff jump that everyone does whenever there is a cliff near water. The boys of Alpha Epsilon Pi and their guests all arrive at the beach with the sight of the fun activity and immediately most of the dare-devils want to be a part of that. “Dude, we have to do that,” Topper points out. Rafe enthusiastically nods his head, “We totally have to. I’m going to help Angel set up and then we can head up.” He turns to see the worried look on Y/N’s face. “Rafe, I don’t think you should do that. It looks dangerous,” she frets, watching as the person who just jumped splats across the water. It looks painful. He takes her hands into his and brings them near his heart, “Come on. Please, let me do it, Angel.” 

She gives him a tilt of her head and can see how much he wants to do it. She lets out a sigh, “Fine, but only if you wear a life jacket.” Rafe is about to let out a celebratory cheer until he hears her condition. “Angel, none of the other guys are going to wear a life jacket. I don’t even think half of them own one,” he argues, not wanting to be the only one wearing one. Her expression doesn’t change, “Well, good thing you have a girlfriend who thinks ahead and who brought one. So either you wear the life jacket or you don’t go up at all.” The only person who can order Rafe Cameron around is Y/N Y/L/N. He listens to her command and sorrowfully puts on the jacket she is holding out to him. 

The group set up their area and everyone who wasn’t going to jump was already relaxing on the sand when the others made the climb up the cliff. The Alpha Epsilon Pi group is all circled around the cliff, trying to decide who is going to go first. They notice Rafe’s added accessory. Kelce laughs, “What are you wearing?” “Shut up. Angel made me wear it. You are just jealous that you don’t have someone who cares enough about you to be concerned about your safety,” Rafe snaps, bringing his hand thumbs under the jacket. This causes Kelce to stop laughing and to look sad at the truth of the situation. Tired of the looks the group is giving him, Rafe runs toward the edge and throws himself off of it. Y/N can easily spot her boyfriend falling down the cliff with his life jacket on, heading into the water to meet him halfway. His head breaks the surface of the water to see his Angel swimming over to him and a massive smile grows on his face. He speeds up, so she doesn’t have to do that much work. He brings her legs around his waist once they meet because he knows she isn’t the strongest swimmer. 

“Was it fun?” she questions, moving his wet hair away from his face. He looks at her with a sparkle in his eyes, “I did. Thank you for always wanting to keep me safe, Angel. I felt very secure when I jumped.” A sweet smile appears on her face and she brings their lips together. 

———

What do slightly tipsy fratboys do when they have two carts and an empty slopped street? Cart racing. Yet again, Y/N is there to make sure Rafe is just a little bit safer with his recklessness. “Helmets keep that amazing brain of yours safe. So I need you to wear one for me, Rafe,” she states while placing her bicycle helmet on his head. She has to loosen it a little to make it fight and then kisses him on the cheek. “Good luck. Kick Louis’ ass.” He grows cocky at her encouragement and hops into the cart. Daisy counts the boys down. As soon as she says go, they are pushed off down the hill. Rafe didn’t expect to be so fast and he quickly realizes he doesn’t have anything to stop himself. A car backs out of the driveway and he has nothing to save himself. The cart slams into the driver's side door and the motion causes him to fly backward onto the pavement. His head flings back against it, but thanks to the helmet on his head, more serious damage isn’t done. 

Y/N comes running and tells him not to move. Her phone is in her hand, so she can call an ambulance. “You have to stay still and keep the helmet on until the ambulance gets here. We want to prevent any further damage,” she informs, gently lacing her fingers with his for comfort. He knows he should listen, but he just wants to feel her touch, “Angel, I am fine. I promise.” “Rafe, I’m not kidding. Stay still until the ambulance gets here. Just to be safe.” He doesn’t want to add to her stress around the situation, so he listens. The siren gets louder as they wait and mixes in with the fratboys arguing with the driver. 

She can finally see the light of the ambulance and waves them down. The paramedics get to work on assessing the situation, letting Rafe know, from what it looks like on the scene, that he has no brain or spinal damage. “We are still going to go to the hospital to double-check. It’s a good thing that you are wearing a helmet. It probably helped prevent anything more serious,” the paramedic tells him as he gets put into the ambulance. He looks over at Y/N who is handling the driver situation, “Yeah, I have a pretty smart girlfriend.” She sees him about to get taken away and runs over to be there for him. Sure, his crazy, dangerous stunts aren’t as dangerous anymore, but he was okay with that. Because he prefers keeping himself safe for his guardian Angel. 

[mochinomnoms]

WHAT IF Riddle and Yuu started developing feelings for each other while hiding from Jade/Floyd? What do you think that would look like? Angsty?

I haven't considered it, as Riddle and Yuu are meant to have a sibling relationship in PTM and so the idea of that kinda doesn't exist in my mind lol.

I'm having a bit of a hard time thinking about such a scenario, but I can imagine a case of Riddle and Yuu somehow entering a fake dating scenario to get the twins off their backs, lol.

You'd think Riddle would be the sensible one and shut it down upon the immediate suggestion from you, but the moment he becomes aware of the extent of Floyd's feelings and hears that ominous “Goldfishie~” from down the hall, all sensibilities exit out the window and splat against the stone path like an egg.

Suddenly, very loudly mind you, Riddle is ever so sweetly asking, “So, my dear,” he says it like the words leave a bad taste in his mouth, “where would you like to go for our next date? The cafe in town? Cater always gave it his highest regards!”

You might want to get rid of the scrunched up look on your face, like you just swallowed a bad lemon, or else the twins won't believe it. Though, based on the shared look between them, you don't think they do anyway. In fact, they even look…amused, as you two awkwardly lace your arms together and avoid eye contact with the crowd staring.

The twins do so love playing with their food, and you two just made the little game of cat and mouse so much more funny than they expected. So you two are dating? They never would have guess, since they've never seen you two kiss, let alone lace your hands together. Rumor has it that you two are faking, why don't you disprove the rumors by sharing a kiss right here, right now?

Even Riddle can't hide his cringe, as you two share a look, disgust in both of your eyes that you can't hide. Despite Riddle very loudly telling them that they need to mind their own business, they won't stop pestering you two until you either fest up, or disprove the rumors that they started, though is it really a rumor if it's true?

[marlynnofmany]

Catching Things in Zero-G

“Reach over the border,” Captain Sunlight directed the Frillian twins. “Make sure they’re touching the floor when they cross into gravity.”

I watched from well out of the way as Blip and Blop nodded, holding muscular arms out for the oncoming guests. No one here was new to gravity fluctuations, but that didn’t mean they were fun.

The first person to cross from the damaged ship to ours was a bright red Heatseeker whose name I’d forgotten. He stumbled a bit on landing, grateful for the assistance. Blip and Blop released his hands when he was stable, looking like parents helping their lizardy toddler off a swing set.

Hard on his heels was Bopburt, the big gray Strongarm whose name I did remember (along with his extreme and hilarious dislike for pizza, from when I’d talked him into trying it that one time). I’d worked briefly on that ship before getting a more long-term position on this one. Nobody had changed since then. Bopburt was still a bigger octopus alien than the Strongarms on our ship. He was surprisingly talented at navigating in zero-g, though.

“No need,” he said, waving a tentacle at the waiting hands. He launched off the wall and landed with a splat just on this side of the seam between airlocks. “Thanks, though. They’ll want help with the cargo. Ah, here we go.”

He tentacle-walked over to stand near me as several other crewmates appeared at the hatch with an expensive-looking shipping crate. I couldn’t tell how heavy the thing was about to be, but it was a cube about the size of the bedside table in my quarters, and it shimmered with pearlescence. Even the label on the top was embossed in gold, matching the seam around the edges. Four different crewmates worked together to guide it oh-so-gently toward our ship.

“What’s in it?” I asked Bopburt. “Do you know?”

He made a rude noise. “Clients wouldn’t say. Rich jerks.”

Captain Sunlight watched with concern. “Is it heavy? Should we get a hoversled?”

“No, just don’t drop it.”

“Right.”

There were far too many people involved already, so we just watched as the whole procession made their way awkwardly through the airlock. Captain Kamm showed up during all this, along with the rest of their crew waiting to cross over. She and Captain Sunlight started a conversation over everyone else’s heads.

It was getting crowded. I moved back toward the hallway, where a few of my own crewmates had gathered to greet the guests. It’d been a while since we’d seen our sister ship, and while a damaged gravity generator wasn’t the best of circumstances, it was still nice to visit.

A furry shape trotted past my ankle. I scooped up the cat before she could get in the way. “Hang on there, Telly. You don’t want to get stepped on. I know it all smells new and interesting.”

Telly ignored me, watching the proceedings with great interest. Her mismatched eyes were wide, and she didn’t react when I ruffled her two-toned fur. This was more focus than new arrivals usually got. She hadn’t run out the airlock yet, but there’s always a first. I kept a close eye on her.

“What kind of animal is that?” Bopburt asked, looking up at the tense shape in my arms.

“A cat,” I said. “Humans keep them for companionship and…”

Telly was chattering — that distinct “I see prey” noise.

I turned toward the hall, but too late. She launched off with a kick to my ribs and flashed toward the gravity barrier.

“Telly, no!” I exclaimed, like that had stopped any cat ever.

Some crewmates looked up at me while others jumped aside with startled noises. Blip nearly caught her, which was pretty impressive honestly, but Telly jumped right past and into the other ship. She immediately careened toward the far wall, meowing and clawing at the air.

“Sorry, I’ll get her!” I dodged through the crowd. “I don’t know what she’s going after.” I ignored the conversation behind me and dove into the zero-g. It was just as disorienting as it always was, but I was heading in the right direction.

I caught up to Telly in midair where she’d bounced off the wall and been unable to catch anything with her claws. Those claws immediately tore into my sleeves, leaving more than one scratch that would probably need to get patched up, but I was busy offering comforting noises as I focused on holding her close with my arms while getting my feet into position to hit the wall.

I landed gently, making sure to take it slow before pushing back off, and in that half-breath pause, I saw something skitter past. “Ah!”

“What is it?” called Captain Sunlight.

“Something moved!” said, trying to look for it while shuffling the cat to get an arm free, and also searching for a handhold before I drifted away from the wall. I found a little hook that had probably held decorations once, and that was good enough. I clutched it tight. Telly tried to scramble onto my shoulder. I did my best to hold her in place. The creature had disappeared.

But Telly was chattering again, looking at the ceiling.

Somebody shouted about wire-eating pests. More people were coming back over the gravity barrier, a jumble of motion and urgent conversation about which tools had the best shot at catching something so fast.

“That’s why the gravity’s out! I knew it wouldn’t fail suddenly!”

“Do gravity wands work in zero-g?”

“Better to use a stun gun. Just nobody shoot anyone else.”

“What about that net in the cargo hold? We could—”

I tuned it all out when I spotted the thing Telly was chattering at. It was a flat little silvery beastie with lots of tiny legs and segmented plates on its back, every bit the kind of thing I could see wreaking havoc in the guts of a spaceship. It clung to the ceiling with stillness that could break into astonishing speed in an eyeblink.

The wall below it had pipes sticking out, curving into the living space in the type of ship design that was a little unsightly but immensely useful right now.

With one hand firmly holding Telly against my shoulder and the other on the hook, I turned in the zero-g until I could stick a foot through the loop of pipes. Then I used both hands to grab Telly, holding her out in front of me as I did a sit-up toward the ceiling. “Get it, girl!”

Telly didn’t disappoint. The thing saw her coming and tried to dash away, but she twisted in my grasp to launch off my wrist in a way that was incredibly painful but worth it. She snatched it off the ceiling and brought it to her mouth with a crunch of exoskeleton that I could hear from there.

Then she dropped it, shaking her head in comical disgust as the crowd cheered. Somebody caught it easily. I caught Telly before she could fully realize she was drifting again. After that, it was just a matter of making my way back to gravity without use of my arms. I ended up crowd-surfing, which wasn’t my plan at all, but everyone was appreciative and eager to help.

When I got my feet back under me, the first thing I did was find Eggskin the medic. “Was that safe for her to bite? She doesn’t usually react like that.” Telly wasn’t trying to jump free, busy licking a paw with vigor.

“Yes, I remember it from her original bio scans,” Eggskin told me. “Definitely on the safe list. These are a known pest with a strong flavor. They’re actually a sought-after delicacy in some circles.”

Eggskin was also the cook, which had seemed strange when I first joined the crew, but it made perfect sense these days.

“Oh good,” I said. “All right, kitty, great job. I’ll get you some treats to take the taste out of your mouth, okay?”

Captain Kamm appeared at my elbow, standing on the tips of her tentacles to get a good look at Telly. “Does your little predator like fish?”

“She does!” I said.

“Then we will be happy to reward her with some.” She waved a tentacle at a maroon-and-teal Frillian who was carrying a mesh bag of various things. “It’s the least we can do after she caught the source of our woes. Thank all the stars that it’s a small one, not old enough to spawn more.”

“Hey captain!” someone yelled. “There’s a gap in the seam of that expensive crate! And the bio-scanner shows traces of droppings!”

“More excellent news,” Captain Kamm said with an angry smile.

Captain Sunlight asked, “That crate has a scanner block, doesn’t it? No way to scan for hitchhikers.”

“Oh yes it does,” Captain Kamm confirmed. “How kind of that pest to leave its droppings by the hole where we can detect and record them.”

“They signed a waiver, right?”

“Oh yes.”

When I realized that the rich jerks had set themselves up for paying to repair the gravity generator that their negligence had damaged, I broke into a grin as well. “Such great news!”

Telly moved again, making me tighten my grip instinctively, but it was just to get at the tray of fish chunks that the Frillian was holding out. I took the tray and held it for Telly to eat from. She made some adorable happy noises.

“So you were about to say,” Bopburt said, “That humans keep these creatures for companionship and, and I think I’ve figured out the other thing.”

“Yup,” I agreed. “Valuable predator services.”

“You’re bleeding a bit there.”

“Ah, it’s not the first time. Worth it.”

~~~

The ongoing backstory adventures of the main character from this book. More to come! And I am currently drafting a sequel!

[sailortongue]

"Baking with my boyfriend!"

pairing: Spencer Reid x Reader

wc: 1.6k

summary: you run a popular baking vlog, and after a Q&A video where you said your boyfriend helped you eat all the delicious things you baked, the people demanded a bf reveal

------

“Hi guys!” You waved at the camera enthusiastically. “In honor of the upcoming fall season, today I’m going to be showing you how to bake pumpkin bread!” You were practically sunshine incarnate when you were filming for your viewers, but today was special and you were even more cheery than usual.

The last video you did was a Q&A and apparently many viewers were very curious about what you do with all the baked goods you make because surely you don't eat all of that yourself. You’d laughed, pleased to tell them that you share everything with your lovely boyfriend, and, if you made a particularly large batch of something, then he’d take them to work for his coworkers.

You hadn’t thought much of it, but when you read through the comments it was flooded with requests for a boyfriend reveal. You’d immediately called Spencer into the living room, excitedly asking him if he’d film a video with you. How could he possibly say no to you when you were looking at him with those pleading eyes? He caved embarrassingly quickly, but frankly he’d do anything if it meant that beautiful smile would continue to be directed at him.

And so here you were, standing in your kitchen with Spencer and getting the ingredients and supplies assembled. Now, as much as you loved him, there was a reason he’d never been in one of your videos before: that man was a klutz in the kitchen. For all his intelligence, he couldn't bake a cake to save his life.

Spencer, bless his heart, had neglected to place the eggs in a bowl and accidentally knocked one off the counter, sending it to splat onto the floor. You glanced at the cracked egg slowly seeping across the floor and then back up to Spencer, a grin teasing the edge of your lips. He did the same as you, and as you both made eye contact the tension broke, both of you bursting into laughter.

“I’ll clean it up,” he said sheepishly. “And get another egg.”

You chuckled and continued with your instructions. “Once Spence gets that taken care of, then we’ll have everything we need to start. As usual, we’re going to preheat the oven while we prepare everything. This particular recipe says 325℉ but if any of you would like to bake this at home, there is a note at the bottom of the recipe. It says that if you're using a one pound loaf pan instead of a 9x5, then it may come out underbaked, and if you feel like you need to add more time to it then you should bake at 350℉ instead.”

You felt Spencer’s presence return to your side, this time placing the eggs in a bowl to prevent any more mishaps. He bent down and kissed the top of your head as his way of apologizing. You reciprocated the action and got on your tippy toes to kiss his chin since it was the closest you could get.

Continuing with the recipe, you put Spencer in charge of the streusel topping since it was the most straight forward. You were confident that even with his lacking baking skills he’d be able to do it. You were promptly proven wrong.

“Wow, I’m impressed,” you said.

“Really?” he asked excitedly, ever eager to please you.

“Very. I think you got more flour on the counter than in the bowl.”

He threw his head back and groaned. “Oh come on, it's not that bad.”

“Whatever you say, hun. Can you put it in the fridge?”

He nodded, and you turned your attention back to the camera. “And now for the star of the show we’re going to start on the batter!” As you spoke animatedly and explained every step of the process, Spencer was watching you with rapt attention, a small smile fixed on his face.

Occasionally you’d ask him to measure out some of the ingredients and put them in. You’d had to correct him that the brown sugar had to be packed in, but other than that there was no way he could mess up. The only notable thing that happened was his insistence on tasting the vanilla extract. How could something that smelled so good taste so bad? He was going to learn the hard way and there was nothing you could do to spare the stubborn man. You had practically doubled over with laughter when his expression instantly changed to one of profound disgust. He rushed to the kitchen sink, trying in vain to spit out the vile liquid.

He was positively green when he looked back over at you. “Why would you let me do that?”

Taking pity on him, you poured him a glass of water and handed it to him. “Here, swish.”

He took it gratefully and did as you said. “Thank you. Lesson learned. Vanilla extract is a liar.”

“Would stirring make it better?” you asked, offering the whisk to him.

“No, but licking the batter might.”

You shrugged, “Your loss.”

With your attention back on the camera, Spencer took the opportunity to stand behind you, placing his hands on your hips and watching you mix the dry ingredients into the wet ones from over your shoulder. He took advantage of the close proximity and placed a tender kiss on your temple. You were practically melting on the spot at how domestic everything felt.

“Ok, so with that all mixed up the next thing we have to do is pour it into a greased loaf pan and then sprinkle the streusel on top.” You turned your face to the side, “Hey, hun, can you get the streusel from the fridge?” He hummed in affirmation, leaving you to pour the batter, intentionally leaving a bit more than you usually would to make up for Spencer’s unfortunate experience with the vanilla.

He resumed his position at the counter, standing next to you this time. He was eyeing the bowl with the leftover batter, being very obvious about what he wanted. You giggled. “Trade?” Without a word, he snatched the bowl and handed you the cold one with the topping. As you were sprinkling it onto the top, Spencer was busying himself with licking the spatula.

“Perfect!” you exclaimed when you were done. “Now all that’s left is to put it in the oven for an hour and twenty minutes.” After closing the oven door, you turned to see Spencer scraping more of the batter from the bowl and onto the spatula. You also noticed that some of it was smeared around the corners of his lips. You huffed a breath out through your nose, finding him utterly adorable. You grabbed a rag from the drawer and ran it under the faucet. You walked over to Spencer and he spoke before you could do anything. “If the batter is anything to go by, then the bread will be delicious.”

“Of course it will. I think it'll be one of the best, just because you helped me with it.” He beamed at you. “That was cheesy, but cute.”

“C’mere,” you said, placing your hand on his cheek and adjusting his face so he’d look straight at you. You brought up the hand with the wet rag, wiping his face. He laughed and took the rag from you, using it to clean the stickiness from his hands as well.

Now that there was nothing to do but wait for the pumpkin bread to finish baking, you stopped recording and set about cleaning the mess you two had made.

With both of you working together, the kitchen was pristine in no time. You decided you’d go ahead and start editing the footage you already had, and by the time you had it looking as aesthetic as always, the oven timer went off. You gasped excitedly, hopping off the couch where you were sitting next to Spencer. You quickly slipped on a pair of oven mitts and took it out to cool.

Thirty minutes later and you began recording again. “I wish y’all could smell my kitchen right now,” you started. “Smells so good. Like cinnamon and pumpkin goodness.”

You cut two slices of the loaf, one for each of you. Spencer took a bite before you did and groaned. “It's so good,” he said.

“Better than the batter?” you teased.

“Definitely.”

You took your own bite and reacted just as he had. It really was tasty. “10/10. You guys should definitely make this at home! It’s perfectly moist and pumpkin-y and the streusel topping adds a lot of texture. I hope you all enjoyed this video and I’ll see you next time! Bye!” You waved at the camera before stopping the footage.

There wasn’t much editing that needed to be done since the second take was just a review of the dessert, so you had the video uploaded shortly after, titling it "Baking with my boyfriend!"

You were both splitting a second slice when you started getting notifications on the video. Spencer placed the plate down on the coffee table and got comfy next to you, putting his arm around you and pulling you close. You leaned into his side and opened the app to read the incoming comments.

“#relationshipgoals”

“You two are so cute!”

“Does he have a twin brother? 👀”

“Can we reply?” asked Spencer. You nodded and handed him your phone.

“Does he have a twin brother? 👀”

“Sorry, @user but no, I don’t.”

“Homeboy is so down bad”

“According to Yn, that means I’m infatuated with her. Yes, I am.”

“Omg his HANDS”

“Thank you? I guess?”

You laughed at his reply to the comment about his hands.

“Did yall see the way they look at each other? 🥺”

“Lmao see if he’ll try cacao powder”

Spencer looked at you after reading the cacao powder comment. “Is cacao powder also a liar?”

You shook your head. “Nope. It tastes just like chocolate.”

[blossiewossie]

— Lawless Affair

pairing : gojo x reader x geto genre : business men au (lawyers), smut rating : mature word count : 2k+

shoutout to @junqkook for helping me with learning the ways of tumblr and for helping me prep to post; i still have lots to learn but you made it less intimidating teehee ♡

— note : hihi this is my first time using tumblr and also posting on tumblr, pls be kind. also, i put down 'smut' but the spicy stuff could come in a later part (when i eventually write it, lol) enjoy!

“Ah, ____, I see you’re all set up at your desk!,” you heard someone exclaim behind you.

Spinning around in your chair, you look up to see one of your new colleagues smiling cheerfully at you while holding a woven basket full of supplies. Her silky black hair was tied up in a half-up do with a cute pink bow on it, completely encapsulating her bubbly personality.

“I’m sorry to bug you, but I brought you these!,” she exclaimed brightly, plopping the basket down. She reached in and started pulling out different items for you to use to decorate your cubicle, including a bunch more bows of various sizes.

“Thank you, uh…,” you trailed off sheepishly, glancing at the spot where you were told to wear your name tag on her shirt before realizing she didn’t have hers on.

“Oh, where are my manners?!,” she cried out loud. “I’m Utahime Iori, but you can just call me Iori! I figured since it’s your first day here with us, I’d give you a hand with decorating your spot!”

“Cut it out, would you? You’ll scare her away!,” demanded another colleague. Turning your head towards the new voice, you spot a woman with silver hair sashaying towards you, her heels clicking against the floor. She came to a stop next to Iori and nudged her before turning to you with an apologetic smile, while Iori coughed awkwardly.

“Sorry about her, she tends to overwhelm our new hires with her presence. I promise she means well,” says the new woman. “I’m Mei Mei,” she says.

“Hi, I’m ____,” you say back, laughing as Iori sticks her tongue out at the unimpressed colleague.

You tell them you appreciate how welcoming they are, as you were feeling quite nervous about today. After all, not everyone gets a chance to work at a prestigious law firm under one of the greatest lawyers of the country.

The two women quickly assure you that you’re in good hands and the topic is quickly changed as you all started getting to know each other. Many moments, and laughs, later, you are all exchanging numbers so that you could contact each other outside of work. As the two women say their goodbyes and you turn to face your desk, Mei Mei stops in her tracks and returns to your desk once more.

“Just a final thought. I want to give you a warning,” her voice drops to a whisper, while she glances around carefully.

Intrigued, you lean in, eager to hear what she has to say.

“Whatever you do, do not let him in your pants.”

Sputtering wildly, you look back at Mei Mei with a shocked expression while she has a curious look on her face.

“I’m not letting anyone in my pants, wha-,” you start to stutter out when Mei Mei’s palm splats across your lips, hushing you immediately.

Mei Mei glances around once more before removing her hand.

“The big boss has a friend that likes to linger in here when he has nothing else to do at his own firm,” she says softly. “We cannot speak ill about him freely, but as your friend now, I must warn you. Do not fall for his games. He has slept with every new hire we have had. You don’t want to be tangled up in his mess.”

Straightening up, she looks around once more before nodding at you. Turning on her heel and flipping her silvery locks, she walks away while yelling out a loud ‘Nice talking to you, ____!’ before entering the hallway and disappearing.

Shaking away your thoughts, you straighten back towards your desk and smile amusedly at the basket left behind by your new friends. Digging through, you find a couple of bows of your favorite color and start piling them up on the side, reminding yourself to put them up before you leave for the day.

As the day drags on, you commit to your work meticulously, organizing and storing files away in their proper locations. You hear your coworkers occasionally walking around, but all is silent for the most part.

The next thing you know, BANG!

The door leading into the office area slams open and you see someone’s leg outstretched, as if they had kicked the door.

Startled, you scoot back and stand to lean over your cubicle to see what the commotion’s about as some of your coworkers do the same around you. Some of them have a wide grin on their faces while others roll their eyes and continue on their work as if nothing has happened. You notice most of the women around you are the ones keeping an eye on the door. Must be the hot-shot, you think to yourself.

The outstretched leg at the door set itself down and the man behind it walked in, exuding all the confidence in the world with his stride. You trail your eyes from his covered legs up, appreciating how well his slacks accentuated his long limbs. They continue to make their way up his torso to his chest, where he’s sporting a snug, white button-up with the top buttons lose. His matching suit jacket wrapped seductively around his arms, showing off their physique as he swung them nonchalantly by his side. Finally you raise your eyes up to his face and your breath hitches in your throat.

His eyes — they’re like the color of ice, but there’s more to it. They’re almost paradoxical, the way they sparkle with light but also glint with a hint of darkness. Paired with such breathtaking eyes was his unique hair color, as white as snow. The man was a walking epitome of winter, beautiful yet dangerous. And his smirk, that tied it all together.

Before you was an angel with devilish intentions.

You swore you could see the women in the room swoon instantaneously as the mysterious man waltzed his way around, stopping to chat with different people. Clearing your throat, you duck back down into your seat and try your best to continue where you left off in your work, suddenly feeling a rush of heat between your legs.

Jeez louise, you think to yourself.

Never in your life has a man made your body react like that from just looking at him. Sure, you’ve read some spicy stories here and there that made you want to touch yourself, but just his mere presence is making you feel more than all those stories combined.

You bite your lip as you continue typing, trying to ignore the conversations around you. Soon after you started to finally concentrate and your shoulders relax, a deep hush fell across the room as another set of footsteps make their way into the room, this time from your right side, where the boss’ office was.

“Ah, Satoru, I thought I’d find you here,” said a velvety voice.

Looking up, you realize your boss has stopped right in front of your cubicle as he spoke to the mysterious man. You recognize his voice from when he joined the human resource manager’s call to congratulate you on getting the job, but now you finally get to put a face to the voice — and what a face it is.

His eyes were closed as he smiled towards the mysterious man, making the latter return it with his own smile. His arms were crossed lazily, making his built arms and his toned chest puff out of his navy blue suit. His hair was tied up messily into a bun, with strands coming down the left side of his face, framing it nicely. You could see his ears, pierced and adorned with dark circular earrings. He stood tall, his frame towering over everyone but his friend, who had started to stroll leisurely towards him.

Gods, does being attractive come with being a lawyer?

“My, my, is that any way to welcome your friend, Seguru?”, said the man, Satoru.

You file that name into your memory, making sure to keep it there for later.

You peek through your lashes as the handsome man finally stops in front of your cubicle as well. Squeezing your thighs tightly, you listen as the two lawyers chat absentmindedly and try your best to type quietly. You do your best to tune out their conversation out of respect, but you can’t help stealing glances at them

As you went to look up at them once more, you realize the man Satoru was now looking at you curiously while your boss continued talking. Your breath hitches again as you stare into his twinkling eyes. Time seems to slow as all you can see is him.

You don’t realize your boss stopped talking until he clears his throat to get his friend’s attention, swiftly ending the intense eye contact between you both. Blushing bashfully, you glance back at your boss to see he was already staring at you with an eyebrow raised. He smiles and turns, facing you now.

“Ah, ____. I forgot to come introduce myself to you. I am Seguru Geto, we talked briefly on the call with Mr. Yu, the human resource manager.”, he said proudly, reaching his hand out to you.

You shake his hand as you spoke, noticing how small yours was in his.

“Hello, Mr. Geto. I’m honored to meet you!”, you say brightly, returning his smile with one of yours.

Your boss' smile widens as he turns his body slightly towards the mysterious man and stretches his hand out to him with his palm up.

“This is my friend and the owner of our sister firm, Satoru Gojo. You’ll see him here as he tends to visit us quite often while he lets his fellow lawyers pick up his slack.”

Your hand is suddenly lifted, taken by the handsome man himself, as he places a gentle kiss on it, his eyes never leaving yours.

“Hello there, ____.”, he says slowly, as if tasting your name on his lips, his smile now a smirk once more.

“Pleased to meet you, Mr. Gojo,” you stutter out, yanking your hand back to your chest. You can feel your cheeks heating up again as you shyly look up at him. He sends you a wink as Mr. Geto wraps an arm around his shoulders and starts walking back towards his office, hollering for everyone to get back to work and apologizing for the interruption.

Your eyes follow their leaving forms, trying to decipher if this is real life. Before the door to the boss’ office closes, you see them both stopping to chatter, glance your way with smiles, and exit the room.

You look back to your computer once more, feeling the same heat rush between your legs from before. Now it wasn’t just because of Mr. Gojo, but also because your boss is an attractive specimen as well. A naughty thought of being with both of them crept into your mind, making you bite your lip intensely. The air around you felt warmer than before.

Leaving your desk, you quietly tell the clerk to the side of you that you’ll be going to the bathroom, getting a thumbs up in return. You quickly make your way down the hall to where the bathrooms are located. Rushing towards the sink, you turn the faucet to the cold water side and wet your hands, bringing them up to your face and neck as you look at yourself in the mirror. You notice your bottom lip was a bit red, bringing back your earlier thoughts. The sudden thought of being with both of your senior lawyers made your pussy tingle.

Groaning, you throw your hands back under the cold water to try and distract yourself from your naughty thoughts. You think back to your friend’s warning from earlier. Curiously, you wonder why she didn’t give you a heads up on how much of a hunk your boss was as well. Maybe he’s married, you thought as you dried your hands. Tossing away the napkins, you straighten up your blouse and skirt before nodding at the mirror in satisfaction.

Spinning on your heel, you make your way out of the bathroom and into the hallway. Turning back towards the office area, you walk forward — only to slam into a wall.

Faltering back a couple steps, you feel a pair of hands reach out to steady you.

Quickly apologizing, you look up to see none other than Mr. Gojo looking down at you with a concerned look.

“Are you alright, ____?”, he says, looking you over, probably scanning for any injuries.

“Yes, I am. I’m sorry, I didn’t see you-,”

“This is why I told you not to walk backwards,” said Mr. Geto abruptly, rushing forward from behind Mr. Gojo, stopping behind you to look at you as well. “Are you sure you’re alright?”

You realize now that both men are standing on either side of you, each one scanning your frame from the front and back. You look back up towards Gojo, his eyes now settled back on yours, an eyebrow cocked with a sideways grin. You glance back behind you to see Geto’s eyes surveying your body, lingering on your behind for a moment, before bringing them back up to meet yours, a mischievous smile gracing his lips. You swallow the lump in your throat and cough, before nodding to both of them that you’re okay.

The two men make eye contact before looking back at you and nod as well, both of their eyes twinkling as if there was an inside joke that you missed out on. Shuffling your weight from one heel to the other, you apologize again for not looking at where you were going and excuse yourself so that you can go back to work.

Walking away quickly, you couldn’t help but hear them chuckle to themselves as they talked in hushed tones. Before you reach the end of the hallway and enter the office area, you turn your head back to look at them — only to see them already looking at you with matching smirks on their faces.

Sitting down at your desk, you only had one thought on your mind as you tried to continue your work once more:

What a first day at work this has been.

[jinxed-lemon]

Part 2 to my original post of Mean Siblings Unbreakable Bond because it’s funny writing them:

Whenever they play an outdoor game like Hide and Seek or Tag, it’s a battle to the death to achieve victory. Sonic usually wins the most bc he’s the fastest, so the one ace in his sleeve that Tails learned to pull is the waterworks. Sonic find him during hide and seek? Tears. Sonic is close to tagging him? Tails will fall down and pretend to get hurt and start sobbing. Sonic falls for it every time.

Doing laundry? They make it last for hours on end bc they’ll literally take each others stuff out of the wash mid cycle to out their own in. It pisses the other off so much to the point where they’re constantly stopping the wash to switch out the clothes. Oh, Sonic is washing his old blue hoodie??? Too bad, Tails yanks it out of the washing machine sopping wet and drops it on the floor with a splat to put his blanket in. They know that they can probably just wash their stuff together but it’s funnier this way.

They’re play fighting and Tails learned to do that infamous leg kick. You know the move you do when you’re cornered on your back? He just starts kicking his legs at full speed and Sonic starts screaming bc it’s nearly impossible to get past that move.

Sonic is eating chips and he has dust all over his hands? He purposely bypasses the numerous napkins they have just to go up to Tails and wipe his hands over his head to have the chip dust fall on top of him. Tails retaliates by shaking the empty chip bag over Sonic’s head.

Tails is an avid coffee drinker and Sonic has tried everything to stop his addiction. So he tries the famous ‘replace the sugar with salt’ trick to mess with him. One morning Tails puts the salt in instead and when he takes a sip Sonic already had that shit eating grin on his face. Tails immediately spits the coffee in his face and Sonic fall to the ground screaming.

Tails take advantage of his shorter height and sneakiness to kneel down and tie Sonic’s shoe laces. He’ll fall face first and before Tails can book it away Sonic will stick his leg out and make his brother fall too.

Their favorite way to embarrass the other is going onto each others social media accounts and changing something about their profile. Tails logs on one day and finds that his profile picture had been changed to an embarrassing photo Sonic took of him one day and PROMISED not to show anyone else. Sonic goes into his Twitter and for some reason there’s hundreds of posts hyping up Eggman and basically talking about how Eggman is the best/greatest, etc. His profile, header- everything is basically changed to pro-Eggman propaganda.

Fans: are you and Eggman friends now???

Sonic: I was hacked I would never say this shit pls you gotta believe me 😭

Tails LOVES bringing up the ‘divorced parents’ story whenever someone asks about the relationship between him and Sonic. Like Sonic is about to explain how Tails is his adoptive brother and Tails immediately interrupts and says, “Yeah, this is my dad. He got custody of me after the divorce and it’s been really hard lately so try to be nice to him ok? :(“

They’re eating out at a diner/restaurant and Sonic looooves secretly telling the waiters that it’s Tail’s birthday so they’ll do that embarrassing thing of coming to their table and singing happy birthday in front of the whole restaurant. Tails is mortified and covers his face every time and Sonic will record the whole thing like a corny parent and say “Oh he’s just a little shy! Smile at the camera Tails!1!!1!! 😁”

[truth-bound]

To the new players on Splatoon 3!

For any battle type:

Always remember to booyah back! this means at the start of the round when a player on your team presses booyah, say booyah too! it lets old players know youre communicative and pay attention to your teammates. Its friendly. Its polite. Its honestly gonna make the whole game more enjoyable if you can use the little bit of communication there is.

theres no in game chat function so booyah and this way are the best way to let your team know what's up! booyah when your teammate did something cool! its a morale booster

plan your specials around your teammates. is your special better for support or slaying? check to see if there is already a cooler up if u have it, cus the effects do not stack. and in salmon run specials can be what saves the whole team!!

check your map! not only does it show the current ink coverage, it also shows enemy players if they have taken damage even without being marked. you can jump back to spawn if things seem dangerous and you can jump to teammates. keep in mind that teammates might not be in a safe position for you to land in. anyone can see where you will land and can try to jump kill you. knowing the map itself for good jump points and seeing if the teammate is in a well inked area helps.

Ink spawn. Always. Dont think it applies to X mode? It does. Even in anarchy battles (which splat 2 players might still call ranked out of habit) you should ink spawn. Why? multiple reasons! It keeps your base safer than not. helps maneuverability in getting back in. It helps build your special, which can be incredibly useful for a push. generally speaking, an inked base is a happy base. EDIT: I dont mean ink spawn immediately for anarchy battle, the first push is critical! Use the spawn for free specials to push when you're behind! And dont be thorough in anarchy battle either, prioritize the objective over turf inked unless you have a very good reason otherwise. the movement is also more for a path back to spawn than anything. having escape routes is important.

For turf war:

Inking ground takes priority over killing. Yes if they are dead they cant ink but the respawn time is pretty fast, about 5 to 7 seconds. Also, inking builds special. it is the only way you build special. kills do not build your special. Inked ground both gives a tiny amount of damage to the enemy when they step on it, AND gives you more coverage, AND gives you quicker escape options, AND is the deciding factor of winning the game.

Walls do not count towards points. Only ground. Inking walls isnt useless though, but don't think that inking them all will help you win, its more for maneuverability.

Last second bombs can decide a match. If you have a sub to throw and there is roughly one or two seconds left on the clock, throw it no hesitation. after the match time is over, it will still pause for a second to allow all subs and specials that were out at the last second to explode.

Hide in ink. This should be self explanatory. You aren't as visible if you are submerged in ink and you are faster in ink than walking. if you hide while an enemy player is nearby, and they dont think to check whatever puddle youre in, you could get a sneak attack. another point to focus on inking!

For salmon run:

Learn to squid party! its just jumping and changing in and out of squid to inkling (or octopus to octoling) form very fast so u kinda look like a blob. it might be frowned upon to squid party in other modes but this is totally fine and encouraged!

Pay attention to your teammates positions. Dead teammates cannot help more than sit there and hold a single egg. throw a bomb or shoot at them to revive them. they take priority over eggs in most cases.

Use this way liberally. This way points towards where youre looking. Use it to say hey theres a boss here.

LISTEN TO TEAMMATES. if someone says help or this way go to them. its worth it. they know what theyre doing. usually.

Losing on wave 3 doesnt lower pay grade. It sucks to lose but wave 3 sucks slightly less to lose on.

thats all for now! have fun and i hope you enjoy my favorite game series of all time ever. woomy!

[cosmicpearlz]

a drop of your good love

summary: he’d kill for you just as along as you loved him as much as he loved you.

pairing: gf!ethan landry x reader

warnings: a very graphic description of a murder

a/n: got inspired by another song and this one is ‘kill for your love’ by labrinth :) (i literally wrote this in like 30 minutes)

…………………………………………………………………………….

ethan knew he was in love with you since mindy introduced you into the friend group. something about your personality and character had drawn him to you. all he wanted to do was be close to you. near you.

when he finally confessed his feelings to you after a couple months of friendship, he was surprised to find out that you felt the same. you were finally his and nothing was gonna get in the way of that.

“hey cutie, you here all alone?”

“no, i’m here with my boyfriend and friends,” you replied to the creepy guy that stood too close to you while you were getting another round of drinks.

“i don’t see them anywhere,” his smirk sent red flags in your head. you looked for ethan to find he wasn’t there. maybe off to the bathroom but you needed an out. you turned around once more and made eye contact with chad. you frantically waved him over, to which he gets up with no hesitation.

“there you are, we were getting worried.”

“this is the boyfriend?”

“what’s it to ya, huh?” chad sized up the guy, ready to fight if need be. you were practically his best friend and he’d do anything to protect you.

“i’m just saying she could be with a real man,” the guy goes to grab at your arm but chad stopped that immediately by shoving him.

“keep your fucking hands to yourself,” the bartender finally notices the commotion and calls over security to get the man thrown out.

“what happened baby?” ethan wraps an arm around your waist and you leaned into him. feeling even safer with your boyfriend with you.

“that asshole was bothering y/n while you went to the bathroom. i made sure to set him straight,” chad explained to the boy and patted his shoulder.

“you okay love?” he gently grabs both of your cheeks tilting your head up to look at him.

“yeah, just a bit shook.”

ethan places a kiss on your forehead and takes a look at the man arguing with security. the boy was fuming with anger, how dare someone try to take what’s his? his eyes darken with delight, already knowing how he would make that man pay.

-

it didn’t take long for ethan to find every bit of information on the guy. his name, address, and job, all quickly accessed in the matter of twenty minutes. little did peter know, he wouldn’t live to see another day to harass another person ever again.

“so peter, you like to harass people, huh?”

“man, i don’t know what you’re talking about,” ethan had peter on his knees like the bitch he was, begging for his life.

“oh but you do know. you remember at the club last saturday.”

“i didn’t mean to do it! i swear!”

“i’m afraid time is up. you should’ve known better peter.”

ethan knocked him in the head with the lamp close beside him. successfully knocking the other boy down, he bends down and starts to slash him with his knife. blood splatting all over the ghostface costume but that didn’t bother ethan.

the boy started to picture the way your soft face had a tense look to it. it made him stab peter more and more. getting revenge for you was all he cared about. you, his baby shouldn’t be scared of a loser like peter. shouldn’t be worried about people like him.

peter stayed sprawled out on his living room floor in a pool of his own blood. ethan had stabbed him over a hundred times and ended with slashing his neck and tying his intestines around his cut neck. that’ll show that motherfucker was the thought that ran through ethan’s head before he left the crime scene.

-

you were walking into your shared apartment with ethan. stressed out from a draining work day, all you wanted to do was be in your loving boyfriends arms.

“ethan?” the sight of your sweet boyfriend who you believed couldn’t hurt a fly was bleaching his ghostface mask. the black robe still covered in red blood and what looked like chunks of human flesh.

“baby,” his heart dropped as you stood frozen in place. you weren’t supposed to be home early. ethan steps close to you, only for you to step back.

“what the fu-“

“i did it for you my love. he bothered you and i wasn’t there to help. so i killed him because he doesn’t deserve to live life after that,” your eyes watered and you couldn’t fully process what was happening.

“this was not for me ethan.”

“oh but it was. i’d kill everyone who even thinks about trying to touch you. tries to bother you. tries to be near what’s mine.”

as small tears run down your cheeks, you couldn’t help but to be overwhelmed. you felt just as fucked up as your boyfriend for feeling some what honored knowing he’d kill for you. feeling slightly turned on by his animalistic killing nature.

“i love you so much darling and i’d do anything for you.” the silence was killing ethan, if you didn’t accept him he’d have to handle it. that being killing you but he couldn’t do that. you were the love of his life. he needed you.

“i love you too ethan,” you whispered knowing what this now meant for you. you couldn’t really find it in you to care once you looked into those big brown eyes. maybe in fates own twisted way, you guys were always meant for each other.

“i want to kiss you so bad baby but i gotta get cleaned up first,” he gestured to his blood cover self making you giggle. you bit your lip and nodded, walking closer to him.

“hurry and you can get all of the kisses you want. maybe a little bit more.”

“remember darling, i’d kill for just a drop of your good love because all we’ll ever need is us,” he whispered before carefully kissing your cheek. he didn’t want to get anything on you but boy he couldn’t wait to touch you since you were all his.

[eldritch-spouse]

Hey Pinnie! I was rereading some of your older posts about your vertically challanged creations(i.e. the imps, red, and Fassy boi)and it got me thinking about sharing a bed with them. So I know that when I was younger I was a very restless sleeper tossing and turning all the time. I’m a lot better now but I still move about here and there.

So it got me thinking about how they would react if I rolled on them in my sleep

(I did ask this before but I think the throat gods swallowed it up?)

Fasma is just simply splatting beneath you. He has no reflexes when he's sleepy, you're going to flatten him and he's going to spend the next half hour seeping off your sides like a puddle. If it happens too many times, he's sleeping on the pillow like a domestic animal.

Listen. If you roll on top of Nena, you're likely to wake up to muffled moaning. She's getting her bones crushed by your full weight and it's like getting smothered by your chest, this imp is kind of shamefully getting off until you move.

Lacai likewise gets a kick from being mildly crushed, but he's less considerate and definitely starts groping and spanking around until you roll off or wake up all pissy.

Flints will flip slightly. You're about the only person he allows to touch him so frequently, rolling on top of this imp will have him mildly panicked and possibly forcefully shoving you off. You're lucky he didn't swing at your throat. He'll apologize and explain afterwards.

Jayde is more sorry for you than anything, you're going to get mildly stabbed by his horns and wake up, definitely. If not, he'll resort to pinching you awake before you get one of them in your eye and he has to take a trip to an emergency room in the middle of the night.

Roch is the smallest imp here, and he'd be at risk of cracking things if he didn't already sleep in spares of his work outfit, which protects him from impacts and some compressions. That being said, you're still effectively suffocating him. And boy, what a time for a boner... He might genuinely orgasm.

Rieba is trying to pry you off her without waking you up. When that doesn't work, she resorts to more drastic measures, because if there's an imp that really needs their sleep, it's her. You might get bit.

Eleri is likely whining and poking you everywhere. It's not the first time they've been slept on, especially by Vorticia's girls, who cling to anything warm when they're sleepy. You're flicked and rolled off them more easily than the other imps. They're not even that bothered honestly, a human's weight is nothing compared to the crushing form of a demonlord's child.

Rei barely notices it. No really, he doesn't immediately wake up from your weight on his, it's more likely a noise of yours next to his eardrum will do it. This imp is ripped enough to easily lay you back on your side and simply fall back asleep.

Primin is going to scream. Get off her, you big baby! What are you doing, trying to kill her?! The only way to resolve this is to make sure you sleep at her feet, obviously.

[ickadori]

++ 𝐒𝐇𝐄𝐍 𝐗𝐈𝐀𝐍𝐆

[summary] forced to voice an embarrassing thought to keep from dying, shen does what he does best and comes to your bedside to tease you.

[cws] gn reader. minor spoilers for the UMA spoil fight. reader has a broken rib. unedited.

Maybe turning into a semi-mindless zombie wouldn’t be so bad - at least you wouldn’t have to worry about doing a skin routine any more.

You also wouldn’t have to shout out your hopes and dreams and completely embarrass yourself in front of the trio.

67 seconds.

You sigh to yourself, arms crossed over your chest as you listen to Shen’s dream —a very grandiose one at that, but a part of you feels as if there’s a small possibility of it happening…or maybe that’s just your bias talking—, and three sets of eyes turn to you, waiting.

“Oh,” you start, suddenly feeling a bit embarrassed at the attention. “I…I think I’m just gonna let the timer run out, guys. Don’t worry about me. Carry on.” You wave them off.

“Stop fuckin’ around, this isn’t a game.” Andy snaps, and you shoot him an annoyed look. The man that had come charging in with a rocket launcher, snagged a zombie-bride, and then proceeded to have the entirety of the zombie town participate in a brawl was telling you to stop fuckin’ around?

“Maybe you should try telling that to yourself, you half-dead per—” A head of blue hair is suddenly blocking your vision, and you blink as Shen crouches in front of you, his eyes trained on yours as he gives you a patient look.

“What’s going on?” His eyes flick between your steadily decreasing timer and your face. “Even if we kill Spoil, their ability won’t go away, you know. You’ll stay a zombie.”

“That’s fine,” you obstinately turn your nose up. “I’ve been thinking about switching up my look anywa—!” A scream is pulled from you when you’re suddenly snatched up into the air, and you look back to see Andy holding a fistful of your shirt, a maniacal grin on his face as he propels the both of you closer to spoil.

“You wanna be a zombie, eh? Then let me help speed up the process!” You recall how Andy had immediately spoiled when he got too close to the UMA, and a wave of panic washes over you as you’re forced to come face-to-face with your decision.

“W-Wait! I change my mind! Andy, I said—Andy!” He catapults you into the air, and you wonder for a brief second how the hell Fuuko could possibly get used to this.

Andy grins up at you, and your hands reach out for him as you go flying back down, only to be met with nothing as he cackles. “You know what to do if you don’t wanna die!”

Your gaze moves to Shen who’s watching on with a look of amusement, and your cheeks and ears burn as you slap your hands over your eyes.

Damn it all.

-

“I’ve gotta say, your dream is quite the lofty goal.”

You groan as you flip over in the infirmary’s bed. Not only had you been forced to shout your humiliating dream at the top of your lungs, but Andy had also failed to practice the same care and compassion he put into carrying Fuuko around, resulting in him breaking two of your ribs when his torso slammed into yours to keep you from going splat on the ground.

Maybe if I ignore him, he’ll go away - it’s wishful thinking, but it’s better than facing him after you loudly declared that your dream in life is to—

“I never saw myself getting married,” Shen muses, “but if it was to you…well, I don’t think I’d have too many complaints.” The heart monitor you’re hooked up to starts to beep wildly, and you make a noise of embarrassment before you’re hastily moving to pull the wires away from you.

You only manage to get one off before a pair of warm, strong hands are covering your own and pulling them down to rest in your lap, and your head snaps up to lock gazes with Shen, that signature smile ever present. “I hate you.”

“Yet you wanna marry me - you’re a strange one.” He breathes out a laugh, slightly leaning forward in his chair, and you go to turn your head only to find that you can’t.

“Shen, stop.”

“What?” You narrow your eyes at him, and he pouts before dropping his ability. “I don’t like when you hide that cute face of yours. Haven’t I told you that?” Yes, many times, and it’s only served in making you want to hide it even more to conceal your burning cheeks.

“Well, get used to not seeing it because I’m never showing it again once I get out of here.” You’ll go into hiding—put your ability to good use and vanish off the grid and lay low in the African jungles or something. You could live off the land; build a small house, start a garden, hunt for food, really just reconnect with nature while you waited for the world to end.

Yeah, that’ll do.

“Oh that won’t do,” Shen tsks as he shakes his head. “It won’t be much of a wedding if I can’t see your face.” The beeping goes haywire again, and you sputter as you shake your hands free from his grip.

“I-you-we’re not getting married!” The both of you hadn’t even kissed yet—you weren’t even in a relationship, not really! There was…something between the two of you, but with the possibility of being killed so high, no one was really eager to form such connections.

The idea of getting married to Shen had only come to you after hearing Andy announce that he was getting hitched, to a zombie of all things, and your mind had immediately conjured up images of you and Shen being the ones to tie the knot. It had been a silly thought, but your brain had latched onto it nonetheless in that instant.

“Yet.” He stresses, and then your hands are back in his, his fingers intertwining with yours. “We’ve got a lot of milestones to hit before we can finally tie the knot, after all.” He leans in a bit more, and your eyes widen as his flick down to your lips. “…I think now would be a good time to hit one of ‘em, don’t you?”

…you must have died. Andy hadn’t caught you at all and you had burst open on the ground - they were probably scooping your body parts up right now to give you a proper burial.

You must be in Heaven right now, and this is simply all just some kind of hallucination that God blessed the love-sick idiot with, and who were you to deny such a generous blessing?

“…yeah.”

His lips are soft against yours, incredibly soft, like pillows, and his scent wraps around you and squeezes you tight. You feel warm all over, and when one of his hands move to cup the side of your neck, you briefly wonder if you had went to Hell instead with how hot your skin burns.

His tongue runs along your bottom lip, prompting a gasp from you, and you feel him huff out a laugh through his nose before his tongue is making its way in. It’s rubs against yours, and then it’s running along the roof of your mouth and forcing you to abruptly pull back from the ticklish feeling.

The both of yours breathing is ragged, but that doesn’t stop either of you for going in again - the next kiss is messier, sloppier, chockfull of held back emotions that had been festering for months, and Shen curls an arm around your waist to tug you closer.

A sharp pain follows the action, and you wince through a groan as Shen immediately pulls back and moves his hand away from your side. “I’m sorry,” he pants, lips moving to press against your temple. “I got too caught up.”

“It’s okay.” So much for being in Heaven. “It’s just still really sore.” He hums, fingers softly tugging at the hospital gown you wear as his eyes take in your face. You take the chance to do the same, although you find your gaze focusing on his pink, puffy lips more than anything else.

They curve into a grin. “See something ya like?”

“No.” His fingers push into your cheeks.

“Your face is burning up. You sure you don’t see something you like? You positive? Maybe you want another kiss, huh?” He squishes your cheeks together, forcing your lips to pucker, and you make a noise of complaint before he’s pressing a quick kiss to your mouth. “And another, yeah?” He kisses you again, a loud, exaggerated ‘mwah’ sounding after, and you laugh as best you can with your cheeks squished together.

You don’t know if marriage is in the cards for you two, but even if it’s not, you think that just being with him as you are now is enough.